Hamish & Andy - 341 - Pizza for the People: Jury Selection

Episode Date: July 22, 2026

The date is locked in and the jury selected for the Pizza for the People showdown between full-blooded Italian Luca, and 1/8th Italian Hamish! Andy has been surprised and delighted by something his plumber did in his kitchen, and Hamish probably won’t be trusted to book any holiday excursions for his family again anytime soon. 1. 100 pizza jury is selected 2. Power moves 3. Plumber’s plate stacking skills pleases Andy 4. Holiday cooking class fail 

A listener production. Activate your internet. Because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts in three, two. Sorry, still buffering. Ahoy to me theorist. Hamish. We're mispronounced wheels. Which in if we are, we're scraping the barrel for these.

No, not that. Ahoy to me, backtrianus. Ahoy. Jack. Furious, Battrianus? Backtrianus. No guesses. No guesses.

That sounds like just a soccer team from another country, doesn't it? Yeah. Players you're not aware of. Furis, back to backtrianus. And I'm Domidarius. Oh, again. Through to Domi Darius. He's done it.

That's why he's paid so much. Dromi Darius. It must be. My mistake, Dromy Darius, first time combating. Okay, how do I give a clue here? We're camels. Yeah, we're camels. The Latin names for camels.

How do you know? Oh, the dromedary is a camel. There's not many other places that you see dromedary. Well done, you two. That's how do we give a clue here? And you go, where camels are like, do that's a piece of clue? Yeah, is it one hunt, two hump, drumadier? We are the three main types of living camel.

Interesting. There's a few that have died out. The fairest have. two humps, the fear of sorry, two humps. Only truly wild camel living today. So free. Only truly wild.

Some others say they're wild, but then you catch them at night's leaving in a motel. Bactriarchiatus, Jack, two humps as well. It's a two-homper. Domesticated, cold deserts of Central Asia. And then the Dromedaris, Oderius, is the one hump most common.

makes up 90% of the world's camels. We have a heap of them here in Australia. I would say, though, I thought they were wild, the ones running through the outback? Yeah, I remember someone saying... I mean, that's a good question, but they're not... Is there a difference between native and wild? No.

I mean, yes, but you can be just wild and not native. I think... Wasn't there a million camels, someone told us once? We're moving in Caravan of Courage. I remember we're driving across Australia, and they're like, hey, keep an eye out. There's an estimated million... feral camels in Australia. I think we've got more camels in Australia than any other country in the world.

Like we've got the most camels. They burned. And it was that original, you know, there was like 12 that came out for Birkenwills or something. Got away. Yeah. And then got their freak on. They horny. Maybe Birkenwills didn't let them have sex or something because once they got on their own, they made a million. They were wild camels. They were more than two humpers. They were related to the horny goat. also to Cody. He went toamishnani.com and used the very, very easy to use system to upload what he's been up to.

Howdy, guys. It's Cody from the U.S. over in Southern California. Not sure if news of the soccer win has reached you yet, but the United States just beat Australia 2 to 0 in the World Cup. I just wanted to check in and see if everyone's doing okay with that news. But there's something from your side of the world that just reached me, and I think it's important to make you aware of it, given Hamish's recent fart experience. there's a new Australian study where researchers had people track their farts in an app called

Charger Fart, which feels like something Hamish would have invented if you had grant funding. We found Australians average about five farts a day, and most of that action happens between 6 and 10 p.m. So Hamish waking up the whole house with one in the early morning is not normal. Scientifically, that's off schedule, and I think it's worth further investigations. Cheers, guys. We pass gas with gusto. I did. Yeah.

Yeah, great. Love to see just how much of an outlier that fart was. Five fluffs a day? Yeah. I mean, do you put your phone in your back pocket and just leave it running? How do you have to log it manually? I think it's logging it manually. Yeah.

Like checking the rain gauge back in 1980s. If you were like, guys, don't laugh about this. This is a medical thing. It's science. But I've got an app on my phone. I've got to let it run. all week. Yeah.

Just measuring how many times I fart. Please don't run up to me and make fart noises. Like we are trying to do this besides. It would be a free-for-all. Yeah, it would just be relentless. People would just sneaking up to you with tubers and stuff. It would be awesome. Hey, and the World Cup has been and gone,

but there's another challenge that has really caught the country's attention. It's the pizza challenge laid down to you by Luca. Yeah. A fellow who didn't know, but you've become a quote. with who runs a pizza shop that is lauded. And for people who don't know this story, this is the background. Unexpectedly, a one-eighth Sicilian man is set a challenge. He goes, I challenge you to make a better pizza than me.

By a man who could only be described as full-blood Italiano. Hello everyone, guys. Ciao, chow, guys. Three pizzas. I want to take on the best. Two men. It's going to be very hard for you. One winner.

Wow, I'm very risky for my brand. And 100 delicious reasons to leave it all on the line. You need to do at least good as I do. If you are able to do that, you win 100 pizza. The 100 Pizza Challenge. I can't wait to be spinning discs with you. Coming soon. Oh, man, that's going to be so fucking fun.

I love it. I love it. He joins us now. The 100 Pizza Challenge Pizza for the people. Luca, ahoy and chow to you, my friend. How are we guys? We're great. Now, Luca, I need to apologize first up because apparently,

Carly, who works with us here and the producer, apparently you text us a couple weeks back when your episode came out, you went, oh my God, I didn't realize I was being recorded now. We thought that was. We know that. And people text me, say, Luca, what's going on? You are in a podcast and oh, wow, fantastic. That does make it more glad you feel that it makes it more exciting.

Because sorry, yes, we're so used to when we go, hey, it's Amish and Andy here. Ciao, guys. It's just sort of, we think it's implied that you know we're calling from the studio that you're right. And just to let you know you're on the podcast again. Yes. And this is for the show. A lot to all the audience then as well. Oh, what a man.

Yes. So, Luca. we have set a date for the challenge, which is very exciting. You're familiar with the date. Are we making the date public? No, I think it's a couple of weeks away because we don't want hordes of people throwing off me, throwing off Luca, you know, at the back as I pull into the pizza shop, rocking the car, yelling, you're never going to do it, ma'am.

Within the next three to six weeks, then, let's just say. Let's just say that. What we need to do, though, is nail down the rules between the two of you. We batted out a fair bit of it. We're going to have six jury members, though. Jack will be the jury foreman, so he's going to be there. And we thought today, Luca, like any good trial, I was going to present to you a lot of people that have come forward,

wanting to be part of the pizza jury, and you and Hamish have to be happy with everybody that's registered. So there's no bias. Okay, so you've got the right to veto anyone as I go through the applications. Does that make sense? That sounds good. Yeah. Okay. There's three pizzas. Hamish gets to make two. You get to make one. It's in front of six jury members.

Yep. They all just put forward what they thought was their best pizza. Yep. And we cut. So everyone gets one slice. They come out. Pisa's come out one at a time. And you've got to, you know, you can have your own system, how you score it. And then, yeah, pizza one, two or three. They'll always be served hot. Yes. And you'll get one slice each. So I don't think anyone will be, well, actually, I'm going to ask the jury how many pieces of people. pizza do you normally eat? I'm a five or a six kind of slice guy. I think they should just have one of each. Well, they have to have one of each. But some people eat like a bird and by the third piece, they're like, oh God, no, I'm full and they don't enjoy the third piece. I never enjoy my sixth piece, but I very much still enjoy the third piece, you know. Maybe they don't have to

eat to completion per slice. I just don't want people that can't handle three slices. I know you say. Well, we'll get to that later down the track. But in the meantime, we will cut the pizza into six slices, and then to the six jury members will finish that pizza. So they can't be accused of a slice being slid in, and it can be like deal or no deal. We check that all slices are gods, there's no confusion. I'll now present to you people that want to potentially be part of the jury,

and you two both have to say you're fine with it. Okay, Luca? Yeah, so fantastic. Okay. This is from Casey. Ahoi boys. I've just listened to the recent ep about the pizza showdown as someone who lives in Endeavour Hills.

Yeah, great. And Frequence La Calabrazi, which is the... Okay, yep, that's the pizza shop. That's Lucas Shop. I commend your bravery. It's a showdown I would love to witness. I would love to apply to be part of the jury. I promise to be non-biased member.

Okay. This worries me because they are a regular customer of Lucas. He's probably charmed to them. We can hear how charming he is. They probably love Lewis. Luca, and they would also already know what his pizza tastes like. They'll have a reference. That's a good point.

You're going to veto him? I don't think I can have someone coming in that knows what the pizza tastes like because it's too obvious to them. Luca, do you have a problem with Casey being on the jury? No, of course he was. No, I actually love to have Casey in the jury. Okay, okay, it's a veto. No, no, sorry, sorry, Casey's gone.

I'm not excluding Casey from celebrating in the win. afterwards because again, the prize here is if I win, there'll be a hundred pizza credit put at the shop. We're not going to eat 100 pizzas. This is pizza for the people. That's what I'm doing it for. And I guess it's a bit of an honesty system. You don't have to be completely, you know, down on your luck.

But I would like it to be people that. I think we said that those who have a Hamish Neney loyalty tar, that might be the way that we allow people. I'd extend it even further. I just go, just self-select to go, you know what? Our family could use four pizzas. For whatever reason, we've had a tough week. Pizza for battlers.

No more than four. No more than four, but by the same token. Maxim, order, four. Be respectful with how you're doing it. Nice. Okay, second person applying for the jury. Her name is Keely Judge. She said, I'd love to join the panel of judges.

As my surname is Judge, I feel like it was a task I was literally born for. We're having pizza for dinner tonight as my partner and I, sit down to watch the footies. So consider this training, and hopefully I can be a part of the big day. Love your work, Judge Keely, aka Keely Judge. That's a yes from me. Luca? Yes, sir.

Yeah. Okay. Were you saying yes as in you're there or yes, you're happy with that person to be on the jury? I'm very happy. I'd confirm the second judge. Okay, great, great, great, fantastic. She sounds great. Emma, she'd like her application to be part of the people's,

jury for the pizza. My qualifications include being a lifelong pizza lover who partakes frequently, a South Indian suburbs native who is local to Luca's shop but has never been before. She's in. I'm also a nurse and it's nice to reward nurses. P pizzas. Yeah. Luke, are you happy with that? I'm very happy. Okay, done. Callahan. I just heard the episode laying down about a hundred pizza challenge. I live in Endeavour Hills. as well. I'd love to be a part of the pizza jury. I recently completed actual jury duty. Wow. So I know what it takes, I have experience with juries, and I know how to act unbiasedly.

I also have much experience with pizza eating. I like it a lot. Good. Okay. Very much. In? Very much. Luca? Yes. I really actually have people who have someone that understand very well about pizza. Okay, great. Yeah, exactly. You want an expert on the case. Yeah. Great, great. Angela, well, we three in, got two to go. I'd like to put my hand up to be a judge for the pizza bake-off.

It's not a special name. I'm currently between jobs, so I have time and leisure to undertake grueling taste tasks. I live outside the state, so no bias to the location. I can pay for my own flight, cheap as possible, available. Now we'll fly you in. Now we'll fly you in. I do love a good pizza. The type of pizza, no, I've got to retract.

that last bit. I'm not going to say the type of pizzas that this person likes. Oh, God, no. Don't say that because that's just what will cook. Yeah. But how do you feel about Angela? In. I think she's perfect. Yeah, it's perfect. I mean, the more serious end when they do jury duty and jury selection, this is just based on movies, but you do never see a lawyer just like kind of lovingly say, I think you're perfect.

I think you're a jury member of we've always dreamed of. Or final one then, potentially. This is from Caleb. Dear hiring manager, I'd like to formally apply for the position of pizza judge. See my attached resume. And he's just attached a photo of him eating a pizza. He's in. Where's Caleb from?

No idea. Luca, you happy with Caleb? Yes. Yes, the resume guy is a legend, of course. We have a jury. That was quicker than I thought. We have a date coming up. Expect the next three to six weeks.

If people are into state that I've read out, we will make sure we fly you in cheap as available. How are you feeling ham? Yeah, I got one more thing to add. Luca, you very generously in our last meeting was like, hey, you can just use my pizza dough that I'm making here because the dough is so critical to the pizza, really. Do you think, Luca, though,

I worry that if I win using your dough, I'll sort of still feel like, you know, a huge part of it was, I was driving someone else's car and they had break assist on. And I was, you know, did I really win the race? What do you guys think? Do you think I should have to create my own dough and bring it? You know what, I mean, sorry that I interrupt, guys. The thing is, like two pizza and one pizza. So I don't want to also because the judge,

going to be like influenced by that because they're going to see two pizza, similar color, similar crunch, and maybe they're going to guess. Yeah, you're right, actually. We do have to use the same dough. Let's make it really, they really can't know who made it. It's true. If you're going to stretch it, I don't know. Maybe I underestimate you, but already stretching it like it's already big job,

you know what I mean? Fair enough. They're not going to help that much. I think he raised a great point. He made a great point. Well, pizza number one was a beautiful kind of white thin crust of pizza. Pizza number two was a lump of whole meal dough with some pineapple. With a tin pineapple jammed on it.

And then pizza three was great. But I do want to win the 100 pizzas. So I'm going to say number two was the best. Yeah. Yeah, you can't do that. That's why I'm worried about the two from you and the one from Luca. Because, I mean, are we going to see, are they going to notice too similar? How about this?

How about this? One of us will do two, one of us will do one, but we toss a coin for all hand to start, and the jury never knows who did two, who did one. Oh, I love that. Because that way they're not kind of calculating to go, okay, well, I'm trying to give the win falsely to home. You just have to go off your heart. Well, then you might as well just do one at one. Because the idea was to give you a handicap, I think, so that you have two shots to beat him.

And also, if there's two good pizzas and one poor one, they'll know the good one. are coming from. Yeah, maybe it's just one-on-one. I think it should just be one-on-one. I forget. I can't quite remember why we're doing three. I think it's just one-and-one. One-and-one, and you just don't know which one it was.

Yeah. And these people have never been to this pizza shop. Who wants to kick first? True. Yeah. I think that sounds fair, Luca. You happy with that, Luca? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That sounds a smart way to do. Okay, so exciting. Oh, guys, but the judge, what's going to judge, actually? like the bite, the dodd, crunch, or mainly the topping flavor balance. I think you raise a good point. Do we give a scorecard out, Andy? So each slice, like here's how I imagine it. Each slice has, let's say there's five things, right, out of 10 that you score.

Like you said, Luke, that a real pizza judge would judge on. So it's the texture. It's the crunch. It's the, whatever it is, the mouth feel, the consistency, how well you think it's cooked, whatever. So each slice gets a score out of 50, ultimate, you know, best score being 50. So then each pizza, you add up all those 50s, it has a score out of 300.

And so then it's like a, who got the greatest score out of the two pizzas? We could do that. My feeling is, water. No, my feeling is. My gut's saying we just go, because when you have a great pizza, you're like, that's a great pizza.

You don't go like, oh, that was perfect like, like feel in mouth or whatever you said. That's what I'm thinking with you, Jack. I was like, what makes a better pizza? The one I liked more eating. I think that's... Are we just going purely a vibe? I think it's just like I liked this pizza more.

That's what makes it a better pizza. And we still score them? I think you have to write down how you felt about the pizza pizza number one after you eat it. And in some way, that means you can compare pizza number one to pizza number two. Yep. Yeah, okay. It's just, okay, I really liked this.

I'm giving it an 8.9. I'm not going to explain where that comes from. I can't itemize that score. but I know what I mean when I say an 8.9 and then we add up the score, we have the total score for the pizza based on both people's feel. Yeah, I like that. My final question, maybe we can sort this out on the day. But as you put the topping on, you get it on the flat shovel, get it in the oven,

you've got to cook it. It's obviously woodfired. You've got to be managing the heat, checking it. Oh, yes. I've done a quick Google. but do we only get one attempt each or if you pull it out and you're like, okay, I've burnt that, I'm going again. Is it like a window that we have almost like in Formula One qualifying or it's like,

what do they get like half an hour to put your best lap in? And you go, okay, okay, that pizza is burnt. I think I can do better. Go one more. I'm happy with this one. I'm sending it out. Yeah, I think that introduces the handicap back to Hamish. I like that because you were going to get two goes to beat him.

so maybe it's just he can have a couple of years. I can send out the best of two pizzas. I get one life. Yeah. So if I don't like the way my first pizza comes out, I can use my other life. But that will mean I must perform on the next pizza. Yeah, because you're not going to send out a cold pizza. Because you're either sending a bad one or a cold bad one.

Yeah, it's not your home oven. I think that's fair. You have me about Luca? How about, okay, let's say yes to this, but also the pizza that you're going to present to the judge that it's maybe going to be good but maybe going to be very bad. What I'm going to do, if you lose, I'm going to have in the menu Hamish pizza, which it is bad,

a lot of people going to try how bad you're done. So you will replicate. You will replicate it. You will replicate the brand. So you're going to replicate the bad pizza and add it to your menu. I will live on, I will live on,

in Shanghai. on the menu and you'll, I guess you'll have to say on the menu, like, warning, this is a bad pizza. Yeah, you have to. That's what are going to happen exactly. Like, it's a little risky for you as well. Yeah. Yeah, God, I like it. Well, I really like that.

Okay, thanks, Luca. We're on. See you. See you, babe. Thanks, man. And if there's one thing we hate on this show is people feeling unpowerful. And therefore, we must. try and rectify that balance with power moves.

Now into, I think, at least it's second year on the show. Still fresh. Still fresh, they will keep doing them as long as they keep available. They still make me laugh, and that's the test. How many books remaining, you reckon? One or two. At least two. Yeah, they're still available at the Hawks of a madman price at homeyshani.com.

I think everything else at our stores sold out except for them. But it's a great gift, as you said. Your kids thoroughly enjoying them. Kids loving them. He ordered a few more... The number was outrageous. It was like a few more copies than there was the population of Australia. It was crazy.

It was absolutely crazy. It was enormous. Yes. Well, he did an initial order and then got... He saw that they were selling and got so excited that he doubled the order. And we were like, no, no. Hawks, hogs, hogs. Anyway, hey, this one's from William.

World Cup Power Move. Although I could work across a lot. lot of sports. I actually did this and didn't realize the power move. Great. Well done. AFL match at my sister's house. When watching the World Cup, I or any sporting event, put the TV slash video live stream on a short 30 second to a minute delay. Then keep tabs on the score on your phone or similar device. Very good.

When you notice a score differential, you can immediately throw out a check. Argentina are looking good here. Surely they have to get a goal suit. Yeah, I mean, it's a great... I mean, soccer even more impressive. Yes. Because, of course, frequency of scoring lower. Or...

Oh, they've changed the formation. This might throw the opposite. Something like that. It really is your Oracle to expert comments. Before suddenly, of course, you have the excitement of the goal going in and everyone looking at you thinking you're an absolute expert. I can read the game.

I read the game. like a language, but you probably just see a fun sport with a bunch of people playing up. This comes in from Caitlin. This is great. This is a cross, this is two segments. It's a crossover episode. Across two segments, power moves and something else. She goes, hey, I've told my mum, you know, big fans of the show, told my mum I signed her up for a gusto check at her workplace.

So she answers the phone with the most gusto every day. I'm yet to submit her for a gusto check. Love it. It could be any day, mum. Every phone call, it's not them. They're getting closer. Elijah, power move for you, boys. When taking a group photo and one person is just slightly shorter than the others,

ask them to stand up nice and tall. For example, nice and tall for me here, Noah. Nice and tall is a lovely touch because it shows care. It shows care. All right, this comes in from a judge. Jesse. When you're in a conversation with friends and there's a lot of jokes flying around, turn to your target and say, whoa, are you trying out a new laugh?

This will be puzzled as to how they laughed and bring everyone else's attention to their laugh going forward. This one from Troy. Power move. Workplace setting. Particularly works good in an open plan office. Go up to a co-worker and quietly ask, if you can have a word in private with them.

Then proceed to walk around the office from room to room to create the image that your co-worker just follows you around everywhere. All right. This is a goodie. A little bit involved, but I like it. From Dylan. How I move. Remember how some beer companies like Tuis and stuff used to put trivia inside their bottle caps

and you'd ask someone the question at a drink. drinks or barbecue. Yeah, a lot of fun. When you open the bottle that's from a company that doesn't do trivia on the lid, hold your lid towards yourself and pretend that you are asking a trivia question, but make the trivia question something the person would definitely know. For example, asking your Lebanese friend, what's the tree on the Lebanese flag? Confidently, they will say, that's the cedar tree, to which you reply, no, it's actually the oak tree. This will put them in a fit of rage. They try and convince you of the obvious right answer. Well, you keep saying, it's okay. You'll get the next one.

We had a gas leak at our apartment. Which... Have you had one of these before? Well, we had a flood. The flood, yes. It had a full flood. Liquid leak. We've had everything there.

It's been there probably since we moved in, but I've just kind of been ignoring it. Well, to be fair, Andrew, you've lived in this apartment now for, what, 15 years while you're building your compound? So, you have been there long enough for things to go wrong. So it's been there since the beginning. Wait, you've smelt a gas smell since the beginning and you haven't raised it. Yeah, and I know it goes against me. It's more like a fast and loose thing that Hayne might do. That's a nervous light up for a dart on the couch.

Luckily, a few times an hour, you have a test flame. It's in the cupboard under the cooktop. So when you go in there to get a plate or bowl, you're like, you can smell it. You go, whore. Like, wow, if you hit you, yes. But then once you put, once you close the cupboard and you put the crockery away or you don't need any more, you tend to just go, oh well, it's contained roughly in.

Oh my, I'm shocked. This is like opposite day and you're doing a championship roll. Yeah, yeah. It's, it's very unlike me. I would go to my drawer that's labeled gas detectors and voltage heat detectors. No, I do, anytime I suspect there's a gas like, and I realize this is actually not too long ago and I thought our oven, I thought our stove wasn't turning off properly and you go to ignite it. I realized I squinted my eyes because I thought I still need to see what's going

on. But if this erupts, I want a bit of a head start to be able to shut them fully before the fireball hits my face. So Beck's sister comes around to hang with Beck and she goes to get the plates and she goes, whoa, guys, guys, what is this? I was like, yeah. Yeah, it's a bit of a gas leak. That's really dangerous. Like, it's, it's potent. And I was like, yeah, yeah. It's how sideshow Bob tried to kill Patty or Selma,

right, from Deep Simpson's reference. Yes. So, anyway, we're like, okay, we'll get the plumber. But then the reason why it is annoying is you have to go to the agent who, the apartment agent who's so long and, and, Go to your landlord. Go to my landlord, Hughesy, he owns the apartment. And then they're reluctant to spend any money on it.

So they're like, are you sure, can you do it yourself? So there's all this ring moral. That's why it's been taken so long. Anyway, they eventually agreed to send the plumber out. And the plumber has to take out all the crockery and the plates and stuff to get to it because it's under there. I don't mean this to be disrespectful to plumbers in any way. My dad being a licensed one, or form a license, I don't think he's on the pipes anymore. Plummers do gas.

Yeah. If it's pipes, if it's pipes, we do it. There's not a separate plumber for gas plumbing. No, cool. Plumbing is a gas. I don't think they get enough credit for that. I agree. I just think they're all water, but there's a whole gas system.

Yep, yeah. So he has to take out all the crockery and the plates for the cupboard. I come, he was doing one day, I come home, I open it. It's stacked completely differently. but also stacked better. Now he's back to Andy. So I'm looking at this going, wow. I wonder, did he take it out and think that we could have had a better arrangement

of the different bowls and plates? Or do he not remember that way it came out? And he intuitively is a talented stacker. Or he's in so many cupboards because that's probably the thing. before the pipes. He has to unstack and restack so many cupboards. He's either A, got good at it over the years, or B, maybe they teach it to you,

going to come in contact with a lot of cupboards when you're at TAFE or whatever, going, hey, you know, you don't want to upset your clients. This is how you're pleasing. Well, he joins us now so we can find out. I have never met Rowan. We had to go through a complex system to track him down because he's... You're probably not allowed to know who he was

because they're trying to keep you apart. Yes. Rowan, ahoy to you, mate. Yeah, good-day guys. How's it going? Thank you. Rowan, thank you, mate. By the way, do you learn water first and then gas,

or are you learning it at the same time when you become a plumber? Oh, sorry. You probably just heard my job manager is just going off in the back around there, telling me I've got a job in five minutes. But we do start with water and then we move on to gas. But you kind of learn parts of both as you go. Water can be a gas, of course, and gas. Not that gas.

Not that gas, but that's a different gas. But do you know it's, I mean, we'll get to the plates in a sec, and I know you've got a job manager going off, but do you know gas is coming? Is it very excited to get to gas? Because it means you're kind of getting through the course, or do you prefer water or? No, no, you're right.

You do actually, when you're learning, you look forward to doing the gas and the hardest sort of things. You sort of feel like you were a big kid. Yeah, that's foolish. Because gas is copper pipes, isn't it? So you have to weld those and like, that's big boy stuff, not just like blue and pipes together with warm. That's, yeah, that's fine.

Yeah. That's exactly it. Okay. On to the 20. Big kids. Rowan. Yes. First of all, congratulations on the restack.

Yeah, well done, Rowan. It sounds like you've really pleased the customer here. So first question, did you look at my stacking and the way I had arranged it and went, this could be better? Or did you take it all out and then realize you had to restack? Well, here's where it gets slightly even more complicated than real estate agents and owners and stuff because the person actually did all the restacking was my apprentice. No way.

So he's probably just a natural, I guess. Yeah, right. How young? How new to the job? He has just turned 17. So he's very big. He's obviously really good at stacking dishes. No, it's hard to hang on to a good apprentice, but you've got to do everything you can to keep him.

He's a game changer. He is. That's what I've been hearing. So what he did incredibly that I hadn't done was he's quite stacked it. So like the lower items he put to the front, not necessarily the item you use the most. I had the plates at the front because he used it the most, but it actually makes it so much easier to get to everything the way he's put it back in. Now, is that something you're taught or is that just pure intuitive from him?

I think he just must be a bit of a savant. Yeah, he's a stacking servant. He's good. Can we just quickly talk about the gas for a second? How close to Andy, how close to exploding was Andy? Was it a significant league? Yeah, it was fairly significant. Yeah, I would say that probably just had just enough ventilation

to stop getting to the right percentages, like the ratio where it becomes explosive and you can blow yourself up, like slow to throw Bob. I'm not even trying to be funny, but is that quite reference in the plumbing industry, the side show, Bob Gas League? Because it'd be that and fight club where there's the gas leak explosion, probably the two biggest gas leaks that come to mind in my mind in pop culture.

Yeah, I guess we haven't, we don't get taught that during the syllabus, but it's always in your mind, I think. Yeah. Rowan, applaud your apprentice at 17 years of age, because it's 17 years of age, I mean, he's obviously his parents are making him unpacked the dishwasher, but if he's in a sharehouse, no, God, he's been raised up. that skill. But, Roe, thanks very much.

He's just here, I'm just going to ask him. Do you have to stack the dishes at home? He does, yeah. Yeah. So you can pass on the credit to his mom. Yeah, absolutely. You can tell that that is just, that's a man that come out of a 16-year-long training camp. He's probably giving the first year of his life off and now he gets it.

Ron, thank you, mate. Get onto that job that your manager's on the back for. You're doing a fantastic job, mate. Appreciate it. Cool. Thanks, guys. See, good work. Bye. See, see it. Legend.

And gentlemen, we just got back from a quick, very quick trip to Italy, over and back. Yeah, click joint with the kids. It was actually wonderful. Great family holiday. Went hiking, did a bunch of fun stuff. Loved it. As I've sort of mentioned before, sometimes on family holidays, it does fall to me to go, I'm going to organize. Well, maybe it doesn't even fall to me, but I like to think of myself as the guy that's like,

hey, I've booked something fun for the team. Yeah, you do a good job. I mean, as far as admin goes, Hame does a great job of holidays for family, but also for mates as well. You seem to lock in for that stuff. Why is that? I think because it's always,

I can get very excited, like in the moment, and that, and I can ride that. And so this is where maybe it comes undone because you sometimes don't look into it too much. I also have a romantic idea of when I book it, how amazing this is going to be for the first. So we're in this small seaside town in Italy. We went in the mountains and we're in this seaside town for like four nights, four days.

And I've gone, look, I know if you just sit at the beach, that's great. And like it's pretty rinse and repeat when you're at the beach with kids. But I was like, I think by day three we'll be getting antsy. Like it is a small town. Why don't I have a little Google, see what we can do for fun? And I find something that is a walking, really a pesto cooking class where you catch the boat to Portofino with a guide. Hang on a tip. They teach you how to cook.

Pesto. Right. So you said walking. Well, it mentioned walking briefly. We'll show you a few sites in Porthino, which is a port. Yes. Like a little beautiful iconic port. But mostly it's a Pesto cooking class. It's like a great. This is going to be an honor, you would think, teaching us this is a great photo.

This is a great moment for the kids. It's not very complicated Pesto. I don't know how to make it, but it doesn't seem expensive at the shops and can't have too many ingredients in it. I assume it's olive oil and something green. I had to guess, Basil. But who cares? Because that's about the skill level for kids, right?

Yeah. So I tell Zoe, hey, I've booked this. Great news. Go online, book it. We meet the guy. We're going to meet Enzo at the docks, and it's just going to be gorgeous. She's like, how long is it?

It's like, not that long. I don't really know, but it says, it says three hours. I'm sure it won't be three hours. Because it's just a boat ride. And really, we go to this nonnas house and we cook some pesto. And we, you know, we met Inzo. I was like, 10 o'clock, it was a heat wave when we were there.

It's like, all right, 10 to 1, the heat of the day. It's like, no, it's great. I think it's great because, you know, you're on the water. That's cool. That's cool. Get to the dock and you have to catch the ferry first up. It is like 38 degrees or something. So we had to walk, obviously, you have to walk from the hotel down to the dock.

Yeah. I get those, I was like, I didn't know, like, how much walking is there? Well, there's going to be some walk. I mean, we're not on segways. There's going to be some walking to get to places, but not much. We meet Enzo. The ferry is so crowded. He's like, let's just wait for the next one.

We're standing up the belting sun. Moral is already going through the floor. He's glaring at me. Zoh does not like being in the sun. Yeah, very you, very conscious. She is glaring at me from under a wide-brimmed hat. Enzo, meanwhile, is like, this is his job.

And he's like, you know, I don't know, 50, 55. And when you're a tour guide, it's a little bit like being a stand-up for a very small crowd. Like, it's about energy management. You've got to come out, you've got to start strong, you've got to keep the crowd's attention. Yes. Zoh is so annoyed by this stage. Were you the only people? So Enzo is, yeah.

Yeah. Private tour for people. I'm running off and getting waters and chopper chops and stuff. So I think you're just to try and keep blood sugar up, mostly for Zoh, but just keep everyone's vibe high. Yes. Enzo's, he can tell it's a tough crowd. Yes. He's English is obviously his second language.

You don't need to speak perfect English to know when you're bombing. He's trying to tell us facts about the port, who built the port. I am like Enzo's mum, who's come to his first stand-up gig. Standing in the front going, wow, wow, turning around the guys. I'm trying out so many wows. Yeah. Look at that. This is why you go on these tours going.

never know that stuff. Anyway, the fairy comes, we get off and he goes, now we go for a quick walk. And so it goes, how long is the walk? It's okay. It's his town and it's his, we're just going to see some interesting things. And I couldn't say to Enzo, hey, my wife hates this. So you really need to bring out something. But I believe in, I believe in this spirit of, you know, I always have great faith that when you book these things, they're going to go great. Yes. But even for me, I was like, we need something to make. move the needle here. He goes,

I'm going to show you guys a really special shop and so I'm doing it oh wow. I hadn't done such great wow since the kids did art in my kindergarten.

I'm going to take you to have you guys ever had Faccacaca. Like, oh. Yes. It is. Wow.

What do you know about everyone? Wow. What's a carcha shop? It's like, a different time of wow at that point. Wow.

He's come up with us like that. You have to do better than this. And I'm looking and going, Zoe hadn't looked him in the eye now for half an hour. So we'd stop at something and he'd tell us a fact about how the princess of Jordan had her boat here or something. And Zoe was just staring into the distance. Probably thinking about divorce lawyers or something.

I'm just like staring at the faceture shop. We go to the fakarcha shop and I just, I couldn't get a chance to it, but I'm trying to tell Enzo with my eyes, mate. I'm actually in the entertainment industry and I can't entertain her. Okay. Like, this is not a tough crowd. Yeah.

You need to do something. really amazing here, mate, because this, you've lost her. She's not coming back. She's very angry at me because we've been doing more walking than perhaps was advertised. We get into the feccacia shop

and he goes, now, so you guys know about feccacia and in Italy, a ferccia is a special bread. Yeah. Mate, we... Wow. Wow. We have access to a fecatura in Australia like this.

And he goes, and this shop, I think, sells the best ficcacacaca. Wow. It's his end. We get to the Ficcaccia display case and there's like, you know, giant slabs of ficccia.

To its credit, it looked delicious. Yes. Inso's brothers running. And so there's four different types of faccage. He goes, this one, it's plain. There goes to the next one, which has like olives on it. He goes, this one, it has olives.

And I was like, I'm like, oh, Enzo, if you're going to go along the row here and name what we can clearly see, my wife will kill you. Like, this could be over. And so he does that. We eat some ficcaccia.

I'm doing a lot of wows. Like, that's the best feccautche we've ever tasted. It was good. But at this stage, to recover from heat stroke and just the time wasting, he also took us up a big hill, which is always like furious at me for. He's like, if I had known they'd be walking,

I wouldn't have worn these sandals. There's a lot of that. I'm like, can we just go to pasta? I'm sorry, very hot. Let's go to pasta. Let's make the pesto. We're walking back through. the town and Zoh goes, like, where's this Nana's house?

I was like, I don't, honey, I don't, when Zoh gets angry and I've booked something, she acts like it's my business that I've bought her a long to, like this. Like I've bought her to my job that I've been doing for 10 years. And now this is the first day I'd like had to come and say what I do, which is run tours in Italy. I was like, honey, I don't know where the Nonna lives. My first time here as well, we go to a restaurant. Like, what are we doing at this restaurant?

And then I realized there's two mortar and pestles set up at the restaurant. and we're doing a pesto cooking class, just seated at a table with like hundreds of tourists walking around us and there's like a little dish of peasant of like basil. And so I goes, I thought it was at a nonner's house. Like, yeah, I did too. I would have thought it's at a non-a-shouse. Did it ever say non-us-air?

I quickly was Googling it. Where did I get non-a-from? And I guess I just added that in assuming. That would be a nice thing to do to take us to a non-a-house. We were not in a non-as-house. We were at a tourist trap, like front row restaurant just making pesto with me doing a lot of wow. I was just like, okay, well, so he wrapped him up like an hour early. But he did love, I think I saved the day with, and I give this to any other dad or mom that has organized a family tour where no one's interested in the tour.

He often would stop it as spot-bought and play a game. Instead of giving us a fact, he'd sort of transition into this. game he'd play, which is like one's a truth, one's a lie. Like, I'll tell you a fact about this building. Am I lying? Am I doing the truth? And, you know, Zoh's just staring into the distance, not looking at him, but I'm trying to play along with the game. He would go, one is true, and one is a legend. And then so he'd make it up and they had to guess. And I started going to him, well, I was saying, you know, in Australia, we have a legend. His name is Hamish Blake. and I reckon after the fifth time I did that joke,

the kids started coming around to it. And I reckon, we never got Zoe there. No. I reckon, had we have gone for another hour, I could have got it. I could have got it with the legend gag. But, yeah, if you guys need to know how to make pasto, you let me know.

We'll do it. Do you know there's a pinch of salt in it as well? We'll do it. Wow. Wow. That's the one, Jack. Thanks for me. listening. The Hamish and Andy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at

hamish and Andy.com.