Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2018 Ep 20

Episode Date: July 11, 2018

1. Robbie’s Special Skill2. Happy Birthday gag3. Mannequin challenge4. Power Moves5. True Story – The People’s Junket6. False advertising7. Special Skill – What’s my age again?8. New tracksuits wanted

A LISTEN-UP PRODUCTION! Activate your internet! Cos the Hamish and the Podcast starts in 3... 2... Sorry, still buffering. 1... D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d everyone ready? No. Because it just caught me on the harp. No. And it could be one. Oh yeah. Where's it from? Long. Long shot. Long shot. Long shot. It's a long shot. No, and he just went, oh gosh, I didn't even see the emails yet. To get a greeting. I said to a fakey. That was good enough. Yeah, until I get called back. That would text up on him. Setting me up for the perfect, perfect hero move to call Andy out on the fake one.

But Dirk to all today, my apologies, haven't been to the country for a long time. I mean, was there any temptation for you to not just yell fake straight away and go drag it out a bit lower? Well, we don't do the guessing anymore, as we stated on last week's podcast, because it is a hand break. So I thought to keep the energy up, reveal the fraud. So reveal the fraud, try him by the people, string him up and get on with the shirt, get him on the wall.

We'll continue it though. Oh, we'll definitely continue it. That was, I didn't request you to not have one. That was your, that was a wrap of sloppiness from you. It was just the, the interplay last week when you said, you don't want to, you don't want any inter really continue it. That was, I didn't request you to not have one. That was a ribbit of sloppiness from you. It was just the interplay last week when you said, you don't want to, you don't want to any interplay with it. It's a no interplay. It just felt like, I was zero to do it.

No, no, no, no. It felt like, did it Jack? It felt like, I didn't, it Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said,

Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, Jack said, from straight away. Straight away. I like the effort you put in. I like reminding people that the podcast is international. You don't need to be like on who wants to be really there where we talk. I just felt like I was talking through the answer. And he gives it

shit. I just thought, now you've ended up talking about it more than we had in previous episodes. But I think this discussion is more interesting than the guesses of, oh, you made a noise that I think's from Eastern Europe. Yeah, it cares. Like, I never seen you so passionate about it. Yeah, the further I get from those banal musings that we had, the more angry I am that I let them in this podcast, which I do to be sacred ground for only top shelf content. And I saw the downloads for last week. Screw the roof.

Screw the roof. What you can see day two, day three downloads after the first day, one's word spread. They don't do the kissing. They're not doing the country guessing anymore. They like that. Great, so their hand breaks are off. They must be.

They must be. They must be. They must be very quickly. That was the only feedback we got. And no, let's keep this momentum. We don't, we never have to regain any momentum because we never slowed down. And let's keep this momentum. We don't have to regain any momentum, because we never slide down and use it.

Use it to talk to someone that really captured a vine. This week on the email. Great, love to. Often, as people would know by now, as we have we're rounding the turn, coming charging home for this year's season Of course this year the unexpected bananza has been people's special skills and the breadth and depth of talents that people have From from time to time it will want to get someone on first to discuss their skill before we decide to take things to the next level on this point

I did have an idea for the special skills that I feel like we should potentially have a haul of fame or a leaderboard and then a haul of shame. People that have rocked up and just not delivered what so ever. And then of course the duck's couture issue in the haul contention. We maintain couture ducks. We stand by a diamond. Couture is Cuties of duck, a duck is a coat. A boot is a shoe, a shoe is a boot. Yes. It's the same sort of thing. It's exactly the same. Same as that old shoe boot saying,

except applied to waterbirds. If you're joining the pod from here, we actually have a duck summoning situation. Yeah, we went down to the Eurasian Coots. Tendord Eurasian Coots, upon review, it was found that we were not at fault. Yes. And we have not had to rectify that situation.

As yet, although we still get a lot of points about, you happy for me to put together what I think believed to be the Hall of Famers. Yep, and a Hall of Shamous. And I'll tell you what, this young man, I reckon think believed to be the Hall of Famers. Yep, and the Hall of Shames. And I'll tell you what, this young man, I reckon, could be in the Hall of Fame. Okay. Get an email through the way, throughout the week, Robby. Hmm.

He writes, he used to work at the Woolies' Delhi. We know them, we know them well. At first it started as a game to keep me entertained, but then I got good. Probably the same way that Wolverine's Sparks started as a bit of a game. Yeah, yeah. And then he just, he sort of began to dawn on him the not everyone has these spikes and he can use them to fight crime. Robbie contends that he is able to get within 10 grams when asked for any amount of cold meat specific amount of cold meat so if you say no in I want 770 hand, he can get you between 760 and 780.

This is great because remember I wanted to set up this game between you and I when we go down to Coles Delhi and I wanted to say where amateurs, where amateurs, I wanted to see who was better at picking out meats. He knows the scale. He goes, talent extends from honey hand to Danish Salami, hekkenake, I can even do it with rare roast beef. He joins us on the line, Robbie the meat measureer. Yeah. How are you, mate? Hi boys, and I'd just like to say happy birthday to Andy. Take pressure off your hand a bit.

No, thank you. Robbie, my vocal chords from one of the millions he requests per year, I appreciate it, Robbie. How are you in the meat, mince meat department? Mince. Yeah, so mince meat, I'm not too good at, but any, any coal meat give me give me give me to lami give me turkey and I'll get within 10 grams. He did say coal meat and so it's a meat that can be consumed cold mince can not.

I should not. And therefore outside of his sport. The reason why is I was asking him is because that's often when there's mince meat in the deli you go I need 500 grams of mince meat. Do you have in the deli? I get pre-packaged. Yeah right. Things are all right over on Anis. Yeah, that's right. Doing pretty well. I noticed. You're frosting. Robbie. You're trying to save me, mate.

So the game would be as such. Yeah. We make up a fake deli. Well, here's another like to ask you, Robbie. The game would be as such. Yeah. We make up a fake deli. Yeah. Well, he's not about to ask you, Robbie. And first of all, are you really confident with this? Because it's certainly got our attention. We are very excited to see a man do this in real life. And until four minutes ago, there wasn't a hall of shame up for grabs.

Are you confident you could be in the hall of fame on this skill? I'm pretty confident. I've been out of the game for half a year now. I stopped working at the Delhi That's just that's a skill that sticks with you. Yeah, it is like riding bike weighing that is a weighing me is like riding bike If I said you just as an example if I said hey 450 grams of salami you could get it pretty close to on the nose. Yeah, yeah. Within pancrumbs.

I must say salami is the seavenly lifer than you'd think, but I can handle it. I agree with that. I agree with that. I'm Gary and salami, certainly. I've picked up a stack of salami before. I honestly have thought that is a lot of things. No, it just sounds like I'm trying to agree with Robbie for no particular reason. I honestly have thought that is a line of I'm trying to agree with Robbie for no particular reason But he's touched on a real feeling I've had

What would you say is heavier than you expect from me? What me? You got honey honey hair. I'll say because of the honey I mean, honey's a heavy Yeah, the honey feels all the other gaps. How is it feels any microscopic pause? Robbie, name your meats. Name the meats that we should bring up. I'd lock in, I'd say, any ham.

I'd say, any ham. Shave, shave champagne ham should be good. Shave champagne. So it's coming in like the shreds and bits and pieces. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is added to a press meat. And that allows you to maybe add one or two grams here or there right at the end Okay, exactly. So shave champagne him name three meats. Okay, shave champagne ham. Mm-hmm. We can all Breroes beef Hello, it's a bit more expensive

You worry about that right? I can't put a price on his talent. I'll sort that out. I'll sort that out. I know he'll be paying for that. This is a custom mince. Yeah. Maybe some of the other roasted turkey. I could probably hand it. Very good. Okay. Now Robbie, now just thing you bring up the cost of this mate. We obviously, as you can easily tell, you've definitely got our attention with this. We love this. We're in Melbourne. You're in Sydney. Can we fly you down? You could, yeah, for sure. I'm willing to go. We want to see this. We'll put the bill on that. Here's the thing. Now, when we had to hold duck summoning debacle, I mentioned at the time, hey, if you can't summon a duck, you've got to pay for your flights. That was quickly shut down and in hindsight, that's probably fair. What I will say to time, hey, if you can't summon a duck, you gotta pay for your flights. That was quickly shut down, and in hindsight,

that's probably fair. What I will say to you is this though, if you cannot, if you can't get three from five within 10 grams, you'll pay for the meats. I can do that. That's a good deal. We have a challenge. We have a challenge.

So just to really quickly recap, Hem, we're gonna have the meats laid out. Are we saying give us 500 grams or 400 grams of shaved champagne ham? And that's when he goes and does it. And we see it. So we need to pick two more meats. You rise. Or should we just do it out of three?

Well, it's a no three. If you get two out of three within your 10 gram allocation, we will give you an 8 and 8 coin. You get three from three, you get an eight coin coin. Well Amazing. Yeah, I know you fail you pay for the meat pay for the meat now And you don't get to keep them. Yeah, you don't get to have any meat. I don't get to eat the meat No, no, no at your cost. Yeah, we eat the meat your cost If I win if I win, do I get to keep some of the shapeshaping? You can have half the

If I win, if I win, do I get to keep some of the shapeshapes? You can have half the map. Half the map. Yeah. Thank you. Rob, one more thing. What model of electronic scales would you like? Doesn't shoot it matter. The Woolies, the Woolies one actually worked within a believable 0.2 grams or...

We'll get one from Woolies. We'll get one from Woolies. If you can replicate the Woolie scale, I'll be... You don't know the model number, do you like it's not a Casio 98? Not on me. We'll be right, we'll get it. We'll get it there. We'll get you the most accurate electronic scale we can.

Very good. Thanks for watching. Cheers, Wastey thing. Hey, Mew and I had a victory during the week. So much better than we expected. Yes. We had a function for Channel 9 and talking about true story coming up, true story coming up, a lot of media in the room and a sprinkling, a splash of stars. Yes, it was not the name of the night,

but it was the jest to everyone who was going for. And the voice, judges or coaches, and all their contestants, they were milling about, all your faves, all your faves. Anyway, it turned out it was someone's birth, they were one of the voice contestants. Believe his name was Trent, was it Trent? It's okay. It's okay. Was it Trent? It's okay.

It's okay. You were friends. Exactly. Anyway, suddenly, I think it was Kelly Rolland, who started singing... I think Richard Wilkins was hosting this night. Yep. And you're right, Kelly Rolland was part of it.

And Kelly Rolland said, let's sing Happy Birthday. I think Dickie had planned it. Who really, okay? Only because I think Dickie had planned it. Oh really? Okay. Only because I think is MC of the night. Yeah. For anyone that's MC in an event,

before the event happens, you're looking at a blank run sheet. What am I going to do? What am I going to do? I mean, I know on the paper here, it says I talk to Boy George, I talk to Kelly. Yeah. How about that?

Yeah, he might wear a hat, he might not. But like, what can I do? What if this goes bad? Look at it end on a high note. I know, I'll have organized the cake. At least that's something, at least that's effort. That's I think Richard, I think Dickie organized that, right, as a bit of a, if this whole thing tanks,

at least people might remember the cake. So he's, okay, then. So Dickie's directed at their trends birthday. Yep, he gets trends. Whatever it is. It's his birthday. Let's everyone sing Happy Birthday. Kelly Roll and with a mic starts singing in beautiful.

Happy birthday and the whole crowd. 200 people start singing Happy Birthday except for two people. Well, the volume goes up. Annie and I. Amy, are you lost? Yeah. I mean, why was this day so exciting for us? Why was this night so exciting for us?

I was trying to explain to people why. We weren't expecting to be at a birthday party. Now, for people that listened to the radio show last year, we talked about a power move. I wish I could remember these names. It deserves credit here. And I haven't remembered it. And so I was not going to get me.

But if you remember this incident from the radio show, a young man called up and he said, I look, I do a thing. When it comes time for the hip hips, I do a very, very loud hip hip. And everyone acknowledges the natural leader. And whoever does, whenever, when anyone's family, whoever is hip-hiping, you know, whether it's a gene, if she's the boy, for someone, whatever it is, the hip-hip has the alpha position, the high status role. Human nature means because we were a tribal species and we need leaders and human nature and immediately

something clicks into us to go we will follow you. We immediately cout out of the alpha hip hip up. Sometimes there's one on two but usually one and this power move was yell out hip hip, everyone says hooray, you stop. It's my ham, people suddenly thought they had an incredible leader and their heads being cut off. The dragon and it's crazy. People go everywhere, people don't know what to do. So then a meek hip hip might come in or whatever. So we'll take you back to the moment.

Kelly Rollins is singing, boy George, backing her up, Del Dracood from Joe Jonas or whichever brother it is. Starts started like, they're all singing happy birthday. And they all start singing. The whole room obviously follows them in. 200 people except for two people. Let's you and I. You and I look each other going, oh my God, we can do it.

We didn't even need to say it to each other. We just knew we know what's coming up. It's a room of 100 people. We both just, I don't know. It's like when you hear stories afterwards of like off-judi police officers, or off-judi members of the military, a catastrophe happens, and they can't explain how

to people that haven't been through, but they just knew what to do. They're training kicked in. And for you and I, that's what was happening. We didn't have to say anything, but we knew what was coming up, the hip-hips. We knew what we had to do. We had to get in first to the hip-hips.

You went in a semi-quave early, which is a right move. I felt like we timed it beautifully and we were loud. We came in with the biggest hip-hip, you could possibly imagine. Podcasts, if you'll indulge us, I'll recreate the end of the song for you. I'll be the crowds and you're happy birthday.

Andy will be me and Andy. And this was the timing. You're going to notice the semi semi quave of early difference. And it's the way to do it because in a room like that full of strangers, you've got a high volume song and a lot of gusto in the song. Full of strangers, but also the TV type. So there's a lot of big egos in that room.

Would be silly to think no one's gonna do the hip hip. So it was right to go early to establish the high ground. So this is the end of the song. Happy birthday to you. Hip-Hip? So I was already away. Very early. Yeah, I went early and you had got me

by the second hip though. You were right at my toes. So it was loud. It was loud. I was out of it. It was like we were doing sports my toes. So, it was loud, it was loud. I was out, I was out. It was like we were doing sports here. Yeah, and everyone went, hooray!

And then silence. And then silence. That's the best thing I've ever heard. The best silence. And then we even ducked down. We, Hamish and I then went down to our knees. And it went on one beat, two beat, three beats. That's a start.

We got it baby, we got it. And no one came in for us. No, no. And that's a recovery hip. It went on so long. No one had the guts to come in and pick up the hip. It ended in a really awkward laugh. Richard Wilkins not knowing what's going on. I was having here, I organised the cake, this was meant to be my highlight point. This

was meant to be my fail safe. He would have been taking that back from the bed organiser going, what did you do? Thinking, I think he would have been pleading with them going, have any move in a public gathering book? I would have thought singing Happy Birthday. It's not exciting, but it's something that everyone knows the rules of. And it was, I've never been, we've never pulled it off like that. And I've never felt euphoria like that. Oh man, it was. He was stubborn, Elst, yeah.

It was really something Elst, yeah. Like they could have, I mean, they could have gone out and we'll also like to announce, Namish and Andy, we'd like to give you a 50-year contract to the network and we would have to do care. It's something that they can't beat. What we just felt.

Ha ha ha. Ando, it's time we let the podcast is in on a little bit of a, well, a bit of a journey we've been on last couple of years. It's early taken up a lot of our off air time, but a lot of good documentaries take time. And we didn't want to say we were making this docker because you never know.

You just never know how it's gonna pan out. And I'm sure there's so many docker's, we're like 80% of the footage gets shot. And it's like, well, we just don't have an ending. We didn't make it. We think we've got enough now. We are making a documentary about something we've been working on for pretty close to two years.

People would remember the cool video, the cool viral video, the mannequin challenge. Yes. It's been almost two years now and we have been humming and arring over whether or not we will do one. And we, I don't even know the end of the docko, but we made, like, spoiler alert.

It's a great ending. And we have been making a docko on the journey. It's almost ready to be released. A story nearly two years in the making. I remember around late November, early December 2016, seeing a few people doing it, and it definitely spiked my attention. I called Andy about it pretty soon after. Yeah, I remember getting a call from him and saying to him, you know, what's it all about?

Taking you back to the moment, two men realized a craze was sweeping the world. It's funny, I remember being on the phone to Andy and he said something along the lines of what's this all about. So I told him, well you know, people are freezing in real life and people are filming it. I remember saying freezing. What do you mean freezing? I remember Andy being confused at the term freezing. He said something like freezing. What do you mean freezing? Or something like that. So I tried to get across to him that they weren't really freezing literally. And I remember a ham that explained it. It wasn't literally and I remember saying, oh like a

mannequin. I remember Amy just suddenly saying, oh like a mannequin and I instantly go, you've got it. That's what they're calling it. A very, very long conversation, leading to a question that would change their lives forever. So Andy gets me and Jack together and he says, So I remember getting Jack and him together and I said to them, So boys, should we do it? It was a huge call. I remember him just saying, let me think. I remember saying something along the lines of, let me think. I remember saying something

along the lines of, let me think, you know, because whilst I could see the upside to being part of the funny joke, we didn't want to jump on a bandwagon. I hate bandwagans more than anyone now, and I think I said so at the time. And I vaguely remember Andy saying words to the effect of, boys, I hate bandwagans more than anyone. But the idea of being swept up in this popular fun video craze was certainly tantalizing, and from there, it was never really too far out of our minds. Join these men who struggle to express themselves succinctly in soundbites as they debate taking a huge reputation

risk and doing a mannequin challenge. I kept saying to the guys, I think we really have to focus on the upside here. You know, we're gonna have a piece of footage that will make it look like we are actual mannequins and we're gonna have that footage forever. I remember saying something along the lines of, well, we'll have a piece of footage

that makes it look like we're actual mannequins and we'll have that piece of footage that makes it look like we're actual mannequins and we'll have that forever. And I got that. But to me, the glaring risk was being labeled, you know, late to the party. And I think I said that at the time. I remember the juice to what Andy was saying, and that was about being late to the party. And really, that argument carried us all the way through 2017, and into early mid 2018. I remember, I think it was Andy actually, just coming in one day and saying, let's do it. I remember I just came in one day and in mid 2018, join three men as they take a thoroughly debated leap

into the unknown and create a piece of video trickery that has a track record of going viral. And cut! Woohoo! Did we get it? Did we get it? I think we got it! I didn't move!

Did you guys move? I'm pretty sure I didn't move. Guys, I think that's it! Yes, we menacum. Coming to boutique documentary film festivals soon. I just remember afterwards Andy saying words to the effective, thanks man, thank you for taking us to this awesome place and doing this. I don't remember that.

Ando, it's actually been a couple of weeks since we did this and we should do this now. Oh yeah, palmoves. Palmoves. The reason we use electric guitar there is if you order something to cafe then play that chord, that's a palmove. Yeah, that is a palmove. People will love it. It's a lot of difficulty for you to like the equipment around.

That might reduce your status level, but in essence it's a power move. Hey I had one done to me. It's always a good way to spot a power move by being the victim of a power move. If you ever feel yourself in an interaction suddenly your power less. Something you're hanging a second, I get this low status position. What's that going up on the summit? You've been power moved. You know, Al, right? Al who's a driver who he sometimes use. Lovely bike, right? Dropping me at the airport. He is, we're pulling in, he goes,

oh, it's my mate, Sammy. Right? Sammy's another driver. Hop out, Al's laughing and waving to him. So he pull over, he hops out of the car. Sammy's there unloading the car as well. He's car, he's dropped someone off. I hop out.

The other driver, Sammy, grabs a bag right, like a big duffel bag and goes to throw it at me, right? And I know he's not going to throw it at me because the guy's driving is right next to him because it's thrown at me. I've never met this guy, Sammy before, so I was on a laugh and go, Sammy goes, me, you shit yourself. No, I'm not going, no, I didn't shoot myself. He shot himself. He shot himself. Turning around to everyone going, he shot himself. Where you're allowed to, that bag's been potentially for you. But he's heading to yourself. Literally off-eagerly. But complaining, winging and going, I didn't shoot myself immediately. Lost status. Telling someone they shut themselves

isn't pretty good pal move. Like... That... Quick one here from Nicolette. Yep. Um, when I meet someone for the first time and they tell me their name, I always reply with,

oh that's my dog's name. Oh yeah. I get a lot of heinous dogs out there and I know that feeling. You feel power moved. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, okay. So that's cool. I'm aware that it's a name owned by you. And it's good enough to be something

I've complete control over. I have, and we're all thinking, it's like going, well don't think, don't think of me now on the floor with the least ramanaque. Well you've thought thought of it and I've now power moved you. This is from Alex and he is a london, he could be an Aussie, he lives in London. In the mornings on the way to work I'm using the same tube as in a train and exact same frame carriage as my boss. Okay, so I'm assuming here, banging on sale, this is a bit of a suit.

Okay. Okay, so he's by the hustle and bustle. He has a hard from him on the train. Then I run from the station to my desk to beat him to work. Then when he arrives a few minutes after me, I tap my watch and ask him why he's like. He's like, he's not a bad move.

This one, similar workplace scenario from Ben Nielsen. He says that, got a power move for you. When leaving someone's office or room, I always ask them whether they want the door open or closed. Which everyone they pick, I do the opposite. Perfect. So basic. So basic. That's such a simple power move. And a wonderful family of moves of just asking someone something, trapping them, by getting them, because they stay to preference. And it makes it look like

you're in charge of their preference. It's terrific. Do you want milk or sugar and you tea? Yeah. Milk, thanks. There you go. Completely bite. You'll get what you're given on the loss of use. Certainly. When we do it in our soul. It's an asshole, man. It's one of the funnier asshole moves. There is.

Tim, this comes in from Tim. This is for members of families who are of the Christian faith. Because I don't mean any disrespect. I'm a Christian myself. And I'd prefer this as by saying, let's go work for any religion. At dinner time, once everyone's ready for dinner, that's the time for this power move.

Once everyone's seated at the dinner table, immediately begin praying loudly, with eyes closed and hands together. Everyone will look over to you, see that you're praying and being inclined to join in no matter what they were doing or what conversation they were having. Because everyone's going, yeah. Oh, shit.

Tim's praying. That's what he's saying. I don't know what he's, I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's really saying. I don't know what he's really saying. I don't know what he's really saying. I don't know what he's saying.

I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying.

I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. I don't know what he's saying. You just have to close your eyes and I'm the boss of the press. And occasionally look up at them to go, okay, they're still going. But most of it's head down, yeah.

No, our family's not religious, but I know from being at people's houses that you can't yell out how long it's pretty good. Otherwise, we would have seen a little bit at the raw wedding with that preacher. The general rule is you can never ask for time calls. Let it go, go, go, go, go, let it go, go. That's the rules with prayers. He goes, so once you get everyone wrapped around your finger, you can then decide when the prayer is over

and when everyone is allowed to eat. You have the power over their stomachs and the entire meal. I like that. I mean, not the first time in history that religion has had power over the masses, but good to see that it still exists in this day and age. So. start of August and we obviously do press for that. Well, this is the time. It occurred to us that we're often getting farmed out to bigger shows.

What, who's standing up for the little guys? Exactly, Andy. The here's the thing, when it comes around to this time in a television show's life, we all know the way this goes. Three weeks out, two weeks out, one week out. You do your standard stuff. For us, because we're channel nine, you're gonna do the today's show.

Will you do today's show? Today's show, you feel lucky. You feel lucky. Ah! You're channel nine you're gonna do the today show. Yeah, we do today extra. You feel like it. Give me your own current affair. We love today. We love today. You know current affair do that. Yeah great. Sure. Do you want to do a show again? Yes, okay. We'll do that. Someone here from the Australian wants to talk to you. Okay. Great. Love when you pay back. Some of the Guardian wants to talk to you. Oh huge. I wouldn't have thought we'd be out there cup of tea. Maybe you get a slot in ABC Radio, but they're all big shows. They're all big shows and they're the standard people. News.com. I know you want to do an interview. Yes, happy to do it.

But it's the standard stuff. And we're not poo-pooing that. And I'm sure we'll still do all that and stuff to get the word out about the TV show. But as you said, Ando, what about if you have a podcast that only has eight downloads a week? What if you've got a high school Newspaper or a YouTube channel that you run for your high school and you give updates on the week in wacky news? Yeah, yeah, you're like a 35 subscribers, but they bloody love it. Yeah, if you're weird to say we were lonely

Go on and show if they have a large audience. If you have if you're ahead of a newspaper at a mine I'm sure they have little newsletters. I mean turn on newsletter. I mean, do newsletters, but you're the editor and you're taking it seriously. We would like to essentially provide a junket for you. I would love to appear in mine, your own business. So what would I think is the newsletter for the mine? Here's what we're doing, too.

How, however, small or big your publication is, it could be a podcast, YouTube show, it could be your own TV show on community television, it could be a radio show, regional radio, whatever it may be. It must exist though. It must exist, you must have a valid media outlet. We don't care about even if it's long as you get one,

like as long as you've got consumers of it, that's all that matters. Or if you know someone's got one, tell them, tell them that. We want to do the people's junket. Not the standard, big, masked head, big hitter junket, the people's junket. We want to do a day when we sit down, you got to register homiechandie.com. Go to the other, now the people's junket will be up there, we're going to be a form to fill out, listing your publication, but we'll do four minute slots. We're going to do four minute slots, okay? As many as we can possibly fit in across one day.

So if you get one of these four minute slots, that's a thing. I mean, have your questions ready. Four minutes isn't a lot, but we've got to make it a short interview time so we can fit in as many people as we possibly can. Having said that, our very first interview was Robert Downey, Jr. in France.

And we got given three minutes, 30. And I ran out of questions for two minutes. Yeah. Here's the thing though, we're pretty sure we can say it's gonna be in Sydney, can't we? We are hoping to get, we're hoping to get one of the standard hotel rooms that look at the opera house.

The opera house back there. You often see like the Avengers people and stuff to your junkies. It's gonna cost you a lot of money on that front. You will have to get yourself to Sydney. No, or maybe not. Maybe not. We'll try, you know, just apply. Just apply have to get yourself to Sydney. No, maybe not. Maybe not.

We'll try. You know, just apply. Apply. If you're near Sydney, you can get there, obviously, it makes it a lot better chance. You're a bit of chance. You're a bit of chance to get any one of the covered in four minutes slots.

It's going to be the fourth of August. So if you're listening to this, if you're a fresh, if you're a fast listener, as this goes, it gets uploaded, that's still a few weeks away. Fourth of August. You've got a month. You've got a month. You've got a month. So apply, and we can't wait to see if Fourth of August. You got a month. You got a month. You got a month. So apply and we can't wait to see if he's junk.

We will film it and give you the footage. That's true, yeah. And you'll also get a photo. And we're in the form. Possibly a certificate of attendance. I don't know. We're looking into that. Good luck.

TICKING TICKING TICKING TICKING TICKING TICKING Hey, ando. If there's one crime, one category of crime, American is like a thing, dads, a threatening. I don't know, seems like more dads, a threatening to like prosecute people for. Certainly my dad growing up was always like threatening to prosecute people with this

and I find myself internally going, oh, it's false advertising. You know, I, dad always growing up was, I don't even know if false advertising is a crime. Like, dad was always going, get in for false advertising. You know, it was always like, get this guy for murder. Like, that's an obvious one. But like, yeah, get these guys for false advertising.

That's not true. Yes. It was so much a part of my upbringing that I believe that, like I believe that every week in the courts, there's several dozen cases of false advertising and people going to jail for it. It's probably not a crime. No.

Because all marketing is false advertising. Pretty much all advertising is false advertising. The burgers aren't necessarily better at hungry jacks. No, that was back in their claim. Interesting you mentioned food, because here's this week's one where I thought to myself, I'd get those guys for false advertising, and you can't,

but here's who I would prosecute for false advertising. We're at being bought before the courts. And you and I both fans of, you know, treat yourself once away, bit of a delivery service. Yes. Well, my crime, now that everyone, like we're all getting used to these services,

like a year ago it was really novel and you were, you know, it was exciting. The thing is the photo they use to show the restaurant like the flat lay of the food. I mean, I know we're not surprised that it's obviously they take a much better photo of what's in store than what you're actually going to get. That's a trick that food places have been using since time. Yes, it began. But some restaurants are taking the piss of it more than others. I mean, you do say you go, we know what McDonald's look like,

that's fine. The one that gets me the most, because I'm a fan of chicken. If I had to pick my favorite meat, I'd say chicken. So sometimes in our area, and we live close to each other, I'll think to myself, I want chicken, I know what my standards are, but I wonder if there's anything new out there

that might surprise me. So I'll search for chicken. Red rooster always comes up. The flat lay for red rooster, like the marketing shop that got the photo from above, I mean when I say a flat lay, it's a top down photo of the table. The photo for red rooster is out of control.

Okay. There is, obviously the roast chute, like at the start, it's played it up. Yeah. I don't even think Maca's has played it up there food. It's like who's plating up red rooster? You don't get a plate, though, at the restaurant either. It is no plate, it's not on offer.

Yeah, if Nando's was plating up on their photo, I'd allow that, because when you eat in, you do get a plate. It's plated up. Yeah. Look, I'll accept that the chickens played it up. I can imagine that people get home from research and go, well, don't just grab it out of the bag,

you're animals. Just wait for a second. Let me put it on a plate. Not your mouth. No, think it's more my mouth. The thing that gets me, I then way less probable is plating up the peas. Because you just dig it those like animals.

They're in a bowl, they're like in a beautiful bowl. He's what would never happen. Four pineapple rings are on a plate. Like no one is going, what it gives you impression of. The thing that annoys me the most about this is that there exists a family where, you know, my mom or dad's gone, I'll get Red Rooster. Here you go, you guys chicken, and you've got a selection of peas

or you've got a selection of grilled pineapple rings that's four there. Like some people like, oh no, I won't have one. Whatever. Every family's like, give me my pineapple. Give me my pineapple. Just with never. Ever allow them to be on a plate

because that like indicates that Have as many as you want some might have none some might have three No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, or two bites. Yeah. With your fingers, they never make you to apply. That's the thing you eat while you're thinking about how to serve out the food. Exactly. The thing that really gets me on the chicken, like I said, I accept that no one's going to just like, I'm sure not every family is going to eat it at the fall bag like we do. Some families would put the chicken on a plate. There is a fresh sprig of rose, man, I'm a chicken. Like so much, I'm just like, before you guys hook in, I'm a chicken. Like so much, I'm just like,

before you guys book in, I give you the fridge and get out of the little plastic container I got from the supermarket, a fresh sprig of rose, for the gamush, because as we all know, this isn't the one night of the week. We just eat with our hands like animals. Hey, all listeners to the podcast are supreme human beings. Yeah, there is a step up. Super supreme. Something more, slightly more meat.

And some people, I do remember you're going to free dessert. Super supreme, but all the vegetables, all the meat, double cheese. The deepest dish, the deepest dish crust you could ever imagine. That's how super supreme listeners. They're the ones that have filled out the value. Sorry, just because I'm getting used to this new track scene. When I say, when I'm doing pizza deals, and I was waving my arm there adidas, I was doing the pizza deals. I feel like it feels right.

Because I feel like a retiree who's telling their friends about a great deal you can get. Because it strikes me. It makes me feel like I'm the kind of guy that would eat at a 5pm, double half-priced pizza. Who's special? I'm telling you guys about all these great pizza specials. I feel like Paulie from the sopranos. He's a great piece of specials. I feel like Paulie from the sopranos. Anyway, the superser primes,

those that fill out the valued and important podcast, the form ham. Yes. And there's a lot of people that fill that out. Yep. On that form, you have to list the special skill. Yep. And we have found in the past.

We checked it in there as filler. Yes. We'll be the first to admit it. Because initially we just would basically chase an age name data birth like where you live and basically Do you know anything about anything is the vibe we were going for yeah? Who knows why we wrote the world's special skill my goodness It's basically turned into the point of the podcast Matt joins us in another studio linked up Matt hello hello and a hoi Hoi, happy birthday Andy. Very good boy. Very good boy. I mean actual need today. I think that is aware that it's a special birthday. I say no need. Never a need. Matt on your special skills it was noted that you said you could pick the age of any person just by hearing their voice. That's correct

Matt What standard deviation Within how many years can you pick someone's age? I'd say probably within the four to five year mark maybe three These sounds like a guy trying to give himself because a bit of an extra blanket Maybe three. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, okay. Well, I mean, we'll give you some easy ones. How old am I? It sound like you're about 36. I mean, have we learned anything when we're doing business special skills,

helps to throw a softball out there early. So in the event that you just are guessing 200 for everyone, at least we've got something on the board where we can show that you have some talent in this area. That's good. What about Andy? Also 36? Yeah. Well, that time it comes out. When this podcast comes out, it'll be ticking over 37.

As this has recorded, what about Jack? Hello Matt, this is my voice. Hello Jack. Don't you taste a cube. I'll go at 29. I'm 30. Well, no. Okay. Jack's a really hard one though, because just like no one knows how Mark is serious. No one knows what Jack is doing. What we've done though, you can firm for our producers, Matt, that you can do this over the telephone as well, as long as the clear line. We have more of our VIPs waiting by on a clear line. Let's jump into the game. Simply what will happen is we'll read the name of the person on the call.

They'll have to say, hi Matt, what's my name again? What's my age again? What's my age again? So, Andy's giving away the opening of the show. Which is, you're about to hear a very, very good rendition from Andy and I doing over an 8 bit bit version of Blink 182's hit A sloppy bit acceptable opening here it is Jack's furious his favorite band And it's not the best available Backing music, or it's just better than the original. Is it Apeic? Because the opening is a bit Apeic that opened it up.

No, look at him, tell us. Look at it. Look at it. Look at it. It's a serious... A serious... Punk raid. Punk raid, you're an experienced spirit. You're right, Paul, from Jack. Hopefully it doesn't put a mat off as he tries to guess the age

simply by hearing the voice first of. We should, we should so that before we play, let's set, as Andy and I are the reserve bank of the Hammershandy coin, which is of course what you cover. We should set the parameters. We will give you a plus or minus two years on the age. Do we need all three to win a coin? I reckon two out of three to win a coin.

Two out of three out, babe. It also gets you the coin. All right. Two out of three out, babe. It also gets you the coin. Victor joins us. Victor, please say the line in a hoi. Hi, Matt. What's my age again? Good, Victor. Would we allow Matt to have a bit more of a sample of the voice? Yeah, can I have a bit of a...

I appreciate it. Matt, you can ask Victor one question. What's your age? No! You can do not answer! I did! I might not possibly be that charming! I did leave our flank exposed to that.

Interesting, that's... ...stubbed, balked early. You can ask Victor one, an age unrelated question. What do you do for a living? I work for government in New South Wales. OK, he's building a sample size. He's not just on the voice. It's a little bit unfair, but take it away.

Matt, what is Victor's age? I'm going to go with 33. Oh, Victor. Hello old are you Victor? I'm 51. You do have to have more chances Victor thank you for coming on. Okay what was wrong you're what I think you had 61-year-old listeners. We did. So the doubt, the doubt crept in. Yeah, don't doubt it.

Don't play the numbers, play the voice. Okay. Sebastian, you're going off. Sebastian, you're joined as Sebastian, go for it. Find that, what's my age again? What are you feeling, Maddie? You can ask him one, age unrelated questions, band questions would be, an example would be,

what year did you finish school? I was class of 98, what were you, et cetera. Yeah, I guess what do you do for living again? I am unemployed. Okay, that doesn't give you that much. No, you can't get it. You can't get it any age. My nine month old daughter is unemployed, but then so is my 90 before your old grandma.

I'm not saying you should have a job, Moose. Certainly, I've given Australia enough. I'm not saying send her back to work. I'm just saying, old and young can be unemployed. Matt, again, you're not leading on your skill. No, I'm not. important. Matt again you're not leaning on your skill. Like when I say Superman look through this wall he doesn't go can you give us a mirror? Can I have one peak just one peak into the other in first and then I'll tell you everything that's in there.

Taking away Matt what Sebastian's a? Can? Can leap buildings in a single bound with appropriate stunt rigging and crane apparatus. Yeah Matt, this is your man. Oh jeez, I'm only a 25. Oh Sebastian, Sebastian, how old are you? I'm 18. 18. And only big, you can put me out, out you flunked out massively. I think I helped my intuition. Are you searching for a job especially? You're just taking it easy.

Oh, just taking it easy. Yeah, hurry. You're sorted out. Yeah, you're sorted out. Exactly. So so far you've been about 36 years off. Anna, she stands by, she's been on hold for 20 minutes. Let's give her at least a chance to say the phrase, go for it Anna. Hi Matt, what's my age again? There we go, Matt. Is he better with the females? Dig deep. Dig deep.

Ask an non-adrellated question. Feel that you're skill. Where are you from England oh, they're all a certain age And that rule in England that you can only be 46 No, this is good map. What are you feeling? What are you feeling Anna? What are you feeling at age to be? 29 Anna, what's your age? I'm 38. 9 years old.

Got my heart up. Matt, that's zero from three. Anna, thank you very much for sticking around for that. Do we have? So you were 28 off in the first one? You won the 23, I think. 25, the 33, the 49 and nine, yeah. 42. 42 years off in the space of having three guesses. Matt, promise us one thing. Yeah. Cross that off your list.

Okay, that's not a special skill. You can't do it, be one of these. The skill. In fact, at least out the proof. Conversationally, can you say- Would you come in with no proof back? We're still eight, so was it more of a,

I'd be interested to know if my skill is this? There should be another category. There should be, sorry, it was a special skill. Was a special skill you'd like to know if you've got, but have done no testing and have no proof to back it up? Matt, in fact, conversationally, you now have to say, you know what I'm bad at. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know what I thought I was good at, but I'm not. I'm currently putting on a CV right now. Yeah, I'm bad at? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I thought I was good at? But I'm not. I'm currently putting on a CV right now. Yeah, just I'm not good at. If you need, if this job requires me picking people's voice, at the age, by their voice, I'm not your man. Skills I've been mistaken at full disclosure. Yeah.

Thanks, mate. Cheers. MUSIC What a show. Yes. What a show. What a show. I thought we might have been wrapping it up after that, but you said there's something. Just one more thing I want to talk to everyone about. Now look, hopefully in the next episode, we've got Robbie guessing meat weight, which is working at times to get him.

Just trying to figure out some times to get him to Melbourne. It would be nice to flush out what we just heard, but ando. I want to talk to the group about something. I said I'd like to finish with a big call, but it's not a normal, a big call. It's more of a how much bikes fat up. Okay. I hate these track sets. Yeah hate my tracksuit so much.

I keep meaning to bring it up everywhere. I keep forgetting to organize it. By next show, we're going to have new track suits. I'll take care of it. All new. We've got to be a team, but we're in these Pima outfits. Your guys are fine. I just got the parachute one, and it's been weeks now.

It's been stupid. So should we go back to that? No, I'd like to keep evolving if we can. Yep. I'm going to try and tear up a meeting with someone. OK. Someone, anyone this week, but I'm going to get out of this thing. I agree.

I agree. I agree. I'm like months. Yeah. Yeah. And I hate it. Yeah. You should.

It makes you look older. Like, it's 100% like it looks like it's just makes it's a hundred percent Like it looks like I've just got it out of a bag of charity here Yeah, and you go to the supermarket with it pushing a kind of a prance slash super like a box and eventually You will be that person if you stay in that tracks people avoid me on the straight I said we're going because they're like oh this like, cause often if we rush out to get food, I'm walking fast. And look, I don't want to generalise

but a guy walking really fast in a parachute track seat. It just has a weird feel to it. In, you know, in some of the back streets around here. And I'm welcome. I'm happy, I'm happy to go to the mustard. Yeah, get me out.

Next week you say. Yeah, get me out. Thanks, what you say. Yeah, thanks that. We're out. We're out. Kiss you, kiss you, puma stuff. Good bye guys. and Andy.com.