Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2018 Ep 26

Episode Date: August 22, 2018

1. Bec’s laptop2. Catherine – trolley guess pt 13. Trip to the supermarket4. Catherine – trolley guess pt 25. Power Moves6. Jingle challenge7. Microwave Mia

A list-snap production. Activate your internet. Because the Haymission and the Podcast starts in three, two. Sorry, still buffering. One. One! Jewel, Jewel, Jewel, Jewel. Slovenian. Yes. Well, I'm beginning to recognize the...

...high eyebrows after you've done it, which is, I think, it looks, you want me in Jack to feel like, well, I nailed that. But really, it's a lot of nervousness like a whole butt going. Yeah, absolutely. Did I...

Did I get any of it close? I probably, you probably practiced it about a minute ago and you're hoping did that come out the way I practiced it. Yes, it didn't. So sometimes the first greeting for the LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL The hello starts with a Z with two little dots above it. Yeah, right. How do you pronounce that? But, no, it's actually Zubin. But anyway, Alta Hamm, who works with us in the edit suite for True Story. Oh, that's his.

That's her. Oh, sorry. That's his. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Just joking. She's from Slovenia and I said, well, I'll do it in your order. And you've got a Slovenian one in there.

Hey, I'm going to start with something bad I did. Have you guys been practicing the facial expressions? Oh yes. Did you? Yeah. Jack, we don't like Jack's one. I stopped doing it after last week after we finished the podcast. I tried to do the nose crunch, which is your new way to greet people on the street say it's like

um cute nose crunch like yeah you're having fun we're trying to we're trying to swap home eyebrows to be like oh hello like a sad sad high eyebrows which is we're on the rat race end of the day rat race eyebrows yeah switch it out for cute scrunch of the nose yeah uh is a kind of scrunch of grandma might give a grandchild after they've slipped them a little lollies and they don't tell mum. He's 50 cents. Now the child would do the annoyed scrunch like 50 cents, but we're doing the grandmas scrunch. Exactly. But no, Jackie, you went very good at it last week, so it doesn't surprise me to switch to that.

It remains the facial expression of a choice. Hey, I did something, and I know it's going to get back to you, so I thought I'd manage to come clean and... Cousin, because I will find out. I have spires everywhere. Beck and I were looking at furniture. I already know about this. Do you really?

No, I don't. Looking at furniture, and about three? No, I don't. We'll get furniture. About three hours later, we got home. Is that you having a dig at Beck for an email and from a phone that says, Hello Beck, I think I found your computer in the middle of the road on the highway. Is it yours? Beck comes up to me and goes,

do you unpack my computer from the car? And that's exactly when I remembered that when we were trying to, do you unpack my computer from the car? And that's exactly when I remembered that when we were trying to get a chair in the back of the car, I took it out and put the computer on my roof. I put the computer on the roof of the car. So at that point I'm thinking, no, that can't be yours because yours

is on the roof of the car. So at that point I'm thinking, do I lie? She won't know. She will. That I put it on the roof of the car. But she knows she didn't move it. But then it could just be like, oh, how weird. I mean, you could pull that off by just digging in and going, no.

I have heard of several instances where the computer will wiggle its way out of the boot and it cannot have been made. You can't, I mean, it just seems so gut and dry that you put it on the roof. Well, not necessarily. A computer is wound up on the road. If you and I were going shopping for a chair, I had my computer in your boot and I know I didn't move the computer. And there was a lot of things that got moved from the boot. And no doubt, if you were trying to put a chair in the boot, you would have been in charge of packing it in

because you liked doing that. Knowing all those things, Andy, some guys just called me, my computer was in the middle of the road. Did you take it out when you put the chair in? Whereabouts. Whereabouts on the road? On that way home. It was 10 kilometers away from the furniture store.

Yep. I was on the route we traveled. So did you move my computer when you're packing the chair? We're my first question. What would you go? No, no. No. I'd look.

I did come clean. I came clean. But in my head at that point, I was making a living. You can see it in the live. It's a long shot live. It's a long shot live. So I said to back, yes. Yes, I did move your computer and I do know where

it was, which was on my roof. And I have no business getting off. I said, I may have we talked to the roof rat guys, I can't believe that it's lit. I put it actually put it on the computer holder. But we have on the roof. So I'm feeling mighty bad, but mighty good. How amazing the good. They could turn on or does she have a phone number on it? No, it turned on and it just came up Rebecca Harding computer, that's what it said. So the lady just Googled Rebecca Harding's and got her number and no, emailed her.

I got her email. Got her email, which is bizarre. So had managed to get the email somehow, I think it's maybe through Instagram and emailed it. Do you worry now that since you can just go to your girlfriend's, I haven't get her email that? No, we've changed that. We've just put it on a podcast. Now we've just we've just changed that. Have we? Have we? Are we just making a mental note to change that now? You've just thought of that. I got time. By the time that this comes out, I got time.

Back in radio days, that would have been a bad one. Back in radio days, this would be a scramble. And you just texting Bitcoin, you know every email you're about to get because people will love the challenge. I got time. Yeah, you just realize what you're done with. Yeah, yeah. But that's all right.

Anyway, so I'm going- You're not going to make a ginger email address. No, not a email address. Just wait and get it. She just hasn't have to put it publicly on her Instagram. Yeah. Anyway, so I'm going to make a ginger email address. No, not a email address, just wait and get it. She just hasn't have to put it publicly on her Instagram. Anyway, so scared me, gonna be about peekable, dig harder though, find it.

So anyway, hey, I'm sitting there, I'm like, this is bad news, right? And I said, well, it's obviously turning on. Yeah, the computer's not broken. The computer's not broken, it's obviously turning on. And I said, do you back up, stuff? No, I don't back up anything. Okay, well this is great news that was found. Yeah.

Imagine the... Good lesson to back up. Yeah, and she's like, don't try and spin this into a good news story. And... Pretend you see if it's good news. I'm off the hook. Yeah, exactly. Of course I'll spin it into a good news story.

So I was trying to work out, you know, I was like, okay, well, let's chat to the lady, go straight round, her name was Lauren, right? Right. And we'll try and and Beck was still. She won a reward or a ransom? No, no reward. Ask for. We said, oh, let's just grab some bottles of champagne and go around and she said, because

the lady said she was down on a girl's weekend, down the coast and we'll go around the corner. Perfect. And and drop off some champagne and say thanks very much. Bextile a little bit perplexed with me that I left on the roof, not happy. We get there and it was another Limpic Gold Medalist that had found the computer. They never stopped giving it to this nation.

Amazing, sir. They never stopped giving it. Lauren Burns, the 2000 Sydney Olympic Taikwondo champion. And it's my main choice. first person ever to win the gold medal. In the Taikwondo, she's the one that found the computer. What a bloody Aussie. Exactly. I bet you she drives around on the weekends looking for things she do that will help people.

She's already achieved her dream. As if she had to keep kicking anyone. As if she had to keep kicking. As if she had to keep kicking. As if she had to keep kicking. As if she had to keep kicking. As if she had to keep kicking. As if she had to keep kicking. As if she had to keep kicking anyone. I just got to... Australia Gold Medal wasn't enough. She's still out there trying to make this country a better spot. Did she appreciate the champagne? She appreciated the champagne and Beck was pretty excited to the Olympic gold medalist,

so got me out of my fun, as well. A double win. Mentored. LAUGHTER MUSIC CATHARDON Catherine, welcome. Well, you did an important podcast to just join us in studio.

You were just saying that it's quite hard to get on the high chairs. He is because you're very large. We have a desk, it's almost like a bar stool height. No, it's not normal. It's a spot on. It breaks one of the Australian broadcasting authorities regulations. It's illegally high. We have a big problem.

And he might be in here, we don't know. He's probably walking around, leaping up, trying to grab onto the table. You're not the first... I'm not a great grab. We don't know. Sometimes I feel something against my sneaker, but I dare it look down.

But you're in good company, Al Gore, obviously from presidential race, and leading the world. Yes, game second, leading the world in climate change discussions. He had trouble getting on the chairs. A claim doctor from Jurassic Park, Sam Neal. Yep, also had problems getting on the chair. I think that's what I'm thinking of.

There was someone who, you know, my mind had a very high status position and I saw them try and leap up and side saddle on the chair and they slipped off. I slipped off. I slipped off. He slipped off. And he did want to help. Remember Jack, you were going to... Yeah.

And for anyone that's seen Hunter the Wheel of Pea, Hunter the Wheel of Pea, but he had very much the same character. No, I can do it. Yeah. He was a proud man. Yeah, he was very proud man. And we love him to pieces. And then he, you know, he was sparkling full of great anecdotes

on the show, but in that moment, he was vulnerable. And we wanted to help him when we couldn't. And then Sunny, when he's coming home, he's just helped your son up as well as Veronica's in the very similar manner. We're the same manner. And I have to remember to myself, no, Sunny can sit on my lap, but the Veronica's,

they get a chair. Muscle memory kicks in going, well, I'm picking up a small child, but no, that's a grown woman. It's a grown Veronica. We want to... Enough of the chair history, Catherine, that's not what you're here for.

What you're here for is something that you wrote, really caught my eye. You wrote in your special skills application. You can predict how much a trolley full of groceries will cost. Brackets, visual aid needed for full scientific accuracy. Well, you've come to the right show. Yes. Because as you may have noticed, this studio, with its tall chairs, sits above a cult.

Yeah, I've just got it out. All the way in, I came early, I didn't. It's impossible for you to memorize everything, though. There's no way that could be cheating. So I think you know where this is going. I think I have a vague idea. What Annie and I would like to do, and let's figure out the parameters now,

is we'd like to leave you here in the company of Jack, which sounds like some sort of bad. It's like a booty prize at a raffle. Like, okay, well, someone else won the weekend with the astronaut. And you get the hour 20 minutes Jack Jack, don't be stupid, Vist. We've got producers here watching on. The thing is, Catherine, can I ask a couple of questions?

Yeah, we need some parameters here. Your ability to gauge how much grocery is a cost. Does it come from a working in that environment background? Well, I'm not sure if this is cheating, but I have worked at a supermarket for last eight years. So that's a kind of house. That ain't cheating. That is just great practice and preparation.

Couldn't even notice how much stuff costs, because if I work to the supermarket thing, I'd just be scanning and... Well, I work in the dally, so I don't get to see everything, but I do buy grocery stores. I can barely work out. Yeah, maybe.

Without another, Robby, we've had another dally worker on the show. It's fun. Perhaps say now that we are the number one choice. We're the choice. Yeah, the choice for Delhi is the choice cut for Delhi workers. Okay, Captain, so if we were to bring back in a trolley of groceries and say 20 items, 20 items, would that be okay?

Sure. Within what dollar amount do you think you could guess 20? How sharp's this skill? I'd hope within 10. Then 10 dollars, five in this side. Yeah. I think that's fair, ham. You think that it's close enough or are you hoping for a better?

I can't get it to the cent. That's not going to happen. No, it's not going to happen. God no. No one would have. I'm almost offended you, thinking we would just think that. But I was wondering if sub one dollar We were a dollar either way if we were interested in that

But we're saying five bucks plus minus five bucks. Yeah, the reason I think parts of minus five dollars is pretty fair Ham is because if when you're going to buy something and you see the price and it's a couple of bucks more Yeah, I go okay fair enough. Yeah Over a bigger, you know, 20 hours more. This was out of category, but so now you know, we won't be putting this in our basket, but I'll tell you what, believe me, we're the other day for cheapness. Biscuits.

How much Tim Terms are? I bought three packs. I bought two packs of Tim Terms and a pack of mince losses. That was just, I felt I haven't just turned it up, the voltage on the weekend. I can't believe I checked there. $7.50 for all of that. That's not cheap. Biscuits like $2.50.

Yeah, yeah. Way for the half price deals. Biscuits, a pack of Biscuits get $13. Biscuits in the $5.50. I should wait. I must have lived in the wedding. When he carried on about that, I thought it was going to be cheap. I know.

And think about what a Mars bar cost. He's out of touch with the common man. Don't try and pull the bill short. Think about what a Mars bar costs. 250 you pay for a Mars bar on a vending machine. He doesn't. Oh, a vending machine. That's where I'm coming from.

Oh, you go to, you go to, don't you pay a tipped ends in the vending machine. Don't do that, that would be $100. I just say you get a lot of chocolate and biscuit for $2.50. That's very good, That's very good value. It's like he's now getting paid by two days. I'm not sure.

I mean, are that or are not that a great deal? Okay, Catherine, here's what's going to do. We're going to go down. We will not put biscuits in there. Or wait for items, please. I know we're going to put it in a fair way. You're going to say to me, I bet you this happens, Jack. And you go, that is interesting. I was interested to hear that. That's not Jack.

You know that happens. The Kevin Will Go purchase our bits. We will not put anything in the basket that's on sale. Okay. Good. Or any part of the deal. Three, four. Multi-bought.

Yeah, multi-bought. Yeah, we assume it's all RRP. Yeah. There can be no no wheel and a dealing and no way to die. I'm sorry. I don't think fruit veg can we put fresh produce in? Please don't. I think that's a ruin.

Yeah, I think. I guess just before you design the Grand Prix track, no she can. Please don't. Well they can flex, wait and price. Yes. For two seasons. For two seasons or two season. So and price. Yes. Okay. For two seasons. For two seasons.

So, that's a whole different world. You're right. It's like currency trading. You know who knows where the NICA is at today. We'll be back. People will be able to hear this bit because we're going to take our microphones to the supermarket. You will not, but enjoy your time with Jack.

And we'll be back very soon. I've asked Jack any questions. I look forward to finding out. I, you'll probably look forward to finding out how, if any, was interested about the biscuits, I might bet you will be. And we look forward to finding out what you and Jack talk about. Okay. Okay, here we go. Andy selected one of the shallow trolleys. Yes. Got more than I need for a basket, but I can't be bothered bending down into a deep trolley.

That's what the shallow trolley says. And's exactly 20 items. Walking through the fruit and veg now not interested and uninterested. We should try and grab some stuff We want as well. Well chocolate crunchy Jeremy. Crunchy-dairy-melt chocolate not on sale. That's in the VIX batteries we always have batteries. Good idea. Do we have trips or dubs? Well, what does um sunny need? Exactly. Yeah, good idea. Do we own trips or dubs? Well, I would just, um, sunny neat. Mixed up both honestly, thinking stories.

You never know. I think I actually need double A's at the moment. Okay, grab them. 10 double A's. Finish. Uh, the tablets are on special, but be liquid. No. I'm only a tablet goal.

Thought you might be. Thought you might be. I know you love the efficiency of a tablet. Have you ever heard of nice and natural nut bars? No. Can you grab a nice and natural peanut and cashew? How much do you spend for that? That's about six bucks.

You're out of touch with the common man. That's three bucks. Gotcha. After 15 minutes of walking down aisles, we realised we were ping-to-piggy, but we should have just been throwing stuff in. You talk to me. Pins, pencils, no. Do it on some wipes.

It's on bacteria wipes. No. Glend 20? We should have been grabbing, I don't know what. We're going to actually shopping. This is dumb. We're just going to grab a bunch of things. Okay, I'm getting these.

Just grab anything. We can go shopping later. Rubber gloves. A few minutes later, despite clearly agreeing that we weren't personally shopping for ourselves anymore, I came back from another aisle to catch handy, slipping detergent in the trolley. It'll sneak some um...

Oh yeah! You got me sneaking, you find some detergent tablets for yourself. Come on, this is just about the game. You just caught me mid-sleeping in the... OK. What's for yourself come on this is just about the game Caught me Back then I didn't get the batteries, but that's enough for you. I didn't and actually pack I'm meant to pay for that. Am I? I want my batteries Polenta all that's tricky isn't what would you pay for this much? Polenta? Oh, I's tough. Trick-y, isn't it? What would you pay for this much? Polenta. It's free, that's. Ooh, how to touch for a common man.

Four dollars. LAUGHTER That's a tricky one, because you go, I don't know, it's just corn, corn's cheap. But, ah, is it a fancy food? Like, in what? You don't know. This whole trip just taught me never go shopping with Hamish again. Toothpaste. Small condoms.

LAUGHTER Classic. Are there extra ones? OK, there's no condoms. Classic. Are there extra ones? Okay, there's no condoms in there. Oh, we need a baby formula. This is huge and it's a double-cut. No, no personal stuff. It's been a little bit of a lock-up.

No, you don't see me putting personal stuff in there. Come on, you got jar condoms. You have a baby tube formula. It's got a lock in it? Yeah, man. Do you know what you're carrying a fair? No. It's every second night they're going to story about

and about how you can't get infant formula because people from overseas are buying all the baby formula and people stealing it. They're stealing it. You'll have to get that unlocked. What, who do you go to? Someone, I have to go to someone to get it unlocked. I think you do it the front counter, yeah?

It is. It's so weird. Mike feeding their babies. Oh no, can't get them up and throw them special. you can come back later if you want with your own money. So after a shopping trip that took way longer than you would have thought to just pick 20 supposedly random items, it was time to sum up what we got. An 80 pack of detergent. I've never seen you say happy.

Baby formula, that's actually really good. I'm going to be good boy for that. Nice and natural Napa, loaf of bread, a medium sized, lego's, rose vegetable stir fry, one deodorant roll on, toothpaste, a... We'll say what it is though, advance whitening. Advancing, that's a fancier. 16 AA batteries.

16, is it really? Yeah, great. Two doughnuts, the Pallenta pack, the dairy milk crunchy chalk pack, three dish medics. I've got those for you. It is the refills. Rubbergloss.

Panadolous. Hormus and quen20 spray, which would have been for you because you're a germaphobe. Okay. I got it for the studio actually. Okay. I'm gonna say 98 for me. Okay.

That's for 25 for me. All right. Let's see if. Let's go. Hi there for me. Okay. 125 for me. Alright. Let's see if. Let's go. Hi there. Hi there. Yeah. Thanks, just need to unlock the 80 formula.

Peace, Charlie. What'd you get it? 125. I think you're getting a bloody close. 13790. And I was 125. You were 98. $40 off off out of touch with a common man You've got the platinum cards

Okay, see you in the studio guys Okay, we're back. I've just rushed back in. How is the conversation? What do you guys cover off? Sleep hygiene. Sleep hygiene. What? Okay, we can't talk about that now. I've been intrigued though, but we can't talk about it now. I'm in a mission I have made some purchases. Here comes Hamish right now with the trolley. We have stolen the trolley from Coles. Okay, I'm sure that's good. Oh, damn.

Nothing. We have a look to get in the studio. Nothing was on special. There we go. As Catherine now. Sorry it took a while, guys. And I get a little sidetracked with purchasing things that I suppose we've-

Well, Lenta, why would you buy that? Interesting. Well, we tried to throw throw a few curbs. I can understand that. Bear in mind, this is not me and Andy's normal shopping, although there might be a few items there that we might use post-show. OK.

However, we tried to buy some items that represent a good cross-section of society and maybe a few like the polenta. It's a little trickier to try and figure out what am I going to put my price point at there? Because I would never buy that, so that'senta. That's a little trickier to try and figure out, what am I going to put my price point at there? Because I would never buy that, so that's it. That's harder. That's the game though, isn't it?

Yes, why would you do this to me? Okay, so, but if the skill was, I'll tell you how much the shoving cost that I bought. Yes, we know. So, Catherine, you're looking across all the items. Yep. When you're ready, you turn back through. Talk to us through. What are you seeing in there?

What are you seeing? What are you feeling? What's a big ticket item? What's... Oh, the big ticket item's probably the formula, which you'll probably be sitting at about $20. I think something like that. The order is about $4 batteries, maybe 10.

It's, hmmm. The dip's about five. Interesting. It is a... It's the dips about five. Interesting. It is a... It's a people homeless, I'm very familiar with that one. It's a people 50 grams. Yeah, or the purple, pill pulls, sorry. Gluten free, don't, for that I've got this. It's not very nice.

It's just chickpeas, no one thought there was pollution in chickpeas. It's not good. Oh, it's not good. No, it's not good. It's not a family homeless, more of a Chris' girl. Yes, yes. One of the other big, big hitters in the hummus game. Trying to get another sponsor there.

There's a deep word, we mind it. Catherine. How do we want to do this, Andrew? I'm going to tell her her time's up. Oh, no. Oh, gosh. When are you going to say that? I'm very sure.

Very sure, you're right. Catherine,. Oh, that's what it is. Hey, Cam's really got some bad news for you. Coming down the pipe one pretty soon, is a time-based command from Ando, and it's not of the time extension variety. It's actually going to be a bit of a time-stop call in a 20-sone. And when that happens, I'd like Jack to fire off an almighty drone to add suspense. And then I'd like Catherine to turn back to her microphone and say confidently,

a dollar a million. What her amount is? What's giving you the most trouble at the moment, Catherine? The batteries. The batteries. That is a 16 packet double A remember? Just your cell as well, their brand name,

which makes a difference. Yes, you. They're not, I mean, there are, I didn't see this down there. We all know there are those fancy ones, they have no silver on them. Usually if there's silver on the back of your gates, that if there are higher levels,

there's more energy in there. Of course. These are just you run on the middle and juror cells. Yes. Catherine. But I mean, so you're telling me you've got everything else priced out, and it's the six batches.

The batteries are to give you the niggle. Yeah, and the the polenta because no one buys that. What's your bracket for polenta? Lowest possible price, highest possible price. I don't know. So what could it be? 3 to 7. I think that's sitting in that ballpark. Could be the thing that breaks the day. It could be. I think that's going to be my day. The nice and natural bicep. Here it comes. Get out of the car. The thing Andy said was going to happen. Okay, here it comes, get it. Give it a thumbs up. The thing Andy said was gonna happen. Okay, time's up. No more thinking.

Okay. You're not allowed to keep thinking about it. I'm still thinking. All right, all right. I want to, Andy. So do you want me to say now? I do. I thought we did discuss the process.

I thought we did discuss the process. Let's just go with $1,7. Catherine, the official amount was $137. TMA, because I was going to say $132, but I thought I'd do it. I was shocked. I was shocked. And excellent hindsight possible win. That was like gut, like honestly, but I was like, oh no, it's Coles. It's kind of cheap on that. Oh, Andy was saying you thought they're expensive.

Yeah. I think they're well priced at their cost. Oh, we don't do well, there Okay. There is a big loss for you. You've lost badly. Yeah. Which means you will not get a coin. No. No. Nor will you get.

I can't even say it was close enough. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic.

It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. It was pathetic. If you can guess exactly what the polenta is. sense you will get a token of no value a Hamish and Andy token of no value so not so bear in mind this has no commercial value this token but it's a nice memento to own sentimental so the pointer 475 from memory I think you have not got it no I feel like I haven't four dollars oh come on that was close Yeah, but you said it was all minus about 20% yeah, I'm not a cold shoppers like

But you make like one thing from the trolley. Oh, what did I take? I don't have a dishwasher Take Amy's finished I'll take the polenta so then I have a Take a take a he's finished table. I'll take the polenta so then I have a Meantime Take a polenta. Take a polenta. Yes Before you finish Jack you may have one thing from the trolley. What would you like? I'll go the batteries. Absolutely not.

You're mungrel. I'll be taking those. You didn't pay from the not yours. Thanks Catherine. You didn't pay from the not yours. Thanks Catherine. Oh god. MUSIC Pain power moves. We haven't gone back to this for a while. We've been hanging out to do it, and we are this... First and foremost, we'd like to make the Hamish Nanny podcast, the number one authority worldwide on cataloging and raising power moves. Should we... Should we be exploring power moves.org and and trying to get us still keen on that coffee table book.

Yeah, that's right. For the end of the year, where you start at one side and it's legends and the other side's ourselves. Because we did. We should do that. Yeah, legends and ourselves are usually as we categories power moves fall into. Yeah, let's make it just a book.

Just, yeah, not just a book, but let's not make it in online. Let's go analog. I mean, we've had huge success in the digital domain. Yeah. Sometimes costing us up to $500, $600 a year, just maintaining a farm of about 40 websites. But let's see if the book world can be kind to us.

I like it, I like it. Do you want to kick this one off? Please do. I like it. I like it. I'd you want to kick this one off? Please do Bailey Perkins. Yeah, what do you got back up from him? It's a good a power move for you if you ever get pushed into a pool Good situation. This is actually because that is that is when you've I would think that is the lowest status moment of your life How do you how apart from dragon someone in with you? Which is everyone tries to be if you've been pushed by a good pus life. How, apart from dragging someone in with you, which is everyone tries to do, if you've

been pushed by a good pusher, I love nature. I love nature, you're the other drag. Yes. How do you bounce back from getting pushed in a pool? You're pushing a pool, stay calm and remain underwater as long as possible, face death. Don't breathe. Excellent. Just stay there.

Someone will jump in and try and save you. Oh! You're murdered and say, need you do that. I really love it. That's a river. Especially because it takes all, all, all. Oh, but train for it. Yeah, train for it.

It's a river. It's a river. If you can get to a local pool and end all pool and the cold of months, but this summer, before the summer starts, because it's usually it's backyard parties, you're going can get to a local pool and indoor pool in the cold of months, but this summer, before the summer starts, because it's usually it's backyard parties that are going to get pushed in the pool. Just try and take a pair of old pants in a shirt, down to your local pool this weekend out, and you want to make take turns and push each other in, because I tell you what you're

training for, the big breath as you're falling in. And if you can get a big breath in as you fall in, you'll be able to stay face down for a minute, no worries. And that'll easily be enough time. But face down is enough. If you can, if you can as soon as you hit the water, no, not to come up for breath quickly. If you can just go straight to face down,

it's almost enough as well. That should be the training. That should be the training, this one. Do it. Well, I'm really good. From Rachelle and this is one from her uncle. He pulls this out at family events. It's a good one Let's say we're let's say Jack somehow put on a family event

Which would assume a he's finished his house. So this is set in the distant future when robots rule the world But let's say Jack's finished his house is invited us over a family event I'm Jack's you know the distant cousin. Yeah. You walk up to whoever's put the event on, you give him a big hand shake and you say as loud as you can, well, Jack, I didn't think you'd be able to pull this off, but you have. Yeah.

Yeah. So, what's everyone know? Even though they've gone all this effort had everyone at their house, no one thought they could do it. And they've actually just, they've just met past. I'm gonna throw this one in from Spike, then I'd assume LeVane ham.

I think he's from England, just for the plus four, four at the top of his number. Be sure to come around. At least one percent of podcasts, doesn't he, okay? Powmove, he said, someone tells a funny story or joke, just go, that's good from you. That's good.

Yeah. That's good. That's good. He'll be up there. We ever made that literally, does that. He does that, yeah. It's like he's in charge of everything. It's funny, you's it. Kill the off-the-off. We ever made that literally, does that. That's it. Yeah. So he's in charge of everything.

It's funny, you're not. And knows exactly your ability. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's it. It doesn't even have to be good, just good from you. And I'm watching you and you should work, and I have to impress me. And this is from Craig.

Gee, we've got Legends, our souls. This one's got to be a head scratcher. I mean, it is a power move but Geez, I just have to read it out. You be as guys you're forgetting about the longest existing power moves of all time So you've got my attention used by animals for centuries. Okay, well animals can have power moves, you know I just use by animals. Sorry, so you know like ancient tribes would often worship an animal for their power used by animals. So, you know, like ancient tribes were often worshiped in animal for their power. For instance, the dog, they will happily shit on the ground and look you in the eye while doing it, knowing damn well,

you'll have to clean it up later. So, I cannot stress this heavily enough. Don't do crags, pal. No, not at all. But for any cannilist listening, it's a very good one for me. Yeah, it's a reminder that we tolerate there's shit less than they do, so we will clean it up. But I mean, at the Kim Jong Un and Donald Trump summit, no one was going through that as an option for a palomove when we mean out in the middle of the summit.

I think I might just do a shit and look him in the eye. I mean, it's unpredictable. And it's what they call an asymmetric move. It's not pretty. She doesn't understand that it's not following any logic, but I can't say it's a pal move. Although we go over to a balacord. Julian, him.

Yeah. Julian, friends, he says, when I go by any product, I tap my card and leave straight away, I don't know why, I don't wait for the approved beep when don't you get it? I'm really sick. Right, yeah, really good. I've been interesting in that situation.

I've accidentally done before, but you have. Excuse me, excuse me sir. Okay, no it's okay, it's okay, because they want people to wait. It's a very weird thing we're seeing they're going for a proof, it's like what's credit? I don't actually have that money anyway.

It's just a benzo for the bank, says I'm an ask guy. You know when people are going, they say maybe there's an obvious thing I'm missing here, where they go, is PayPal okay? Like is tap okay? Who isn't doing PayPal? I haven't mentioned this before. So it's like, if anyone say,

like, I know people that do like putting their pinnacle. Is it a security thing? Yeah. It's not people that like the carbon. I just like taking more time. I don't know. I actually, I've got a bag of five cent coins. That's how I'm going to do this.

That's how I, now you've reminded me of a preferred idea. I was meant to break up my girlfriend trying to lay it. So, any extra time. Yeah. I get paid for how long I'm out of the office. I'm gonna do a long one. All right, here's a great one, Anna. It comes in from anonymous, deliberately.

Most of the guys I can't, please don't reveal my name on here because I don't want my power moves to finish. But this is a cracker. They give a few, this is my favorite. Finishing a drink or a bottle or a can of drink, so you finish it. We're on this feeling. Coming to the end of a delicious drink. Ben, you know. You've got to find a bin. But you've got to leave the conversations annoying. Ideally, you get someone else to throw it away for you. How you going to do

that? You can't do the other one. The primary school moves you check out their knees and go, you just, that's the last one. But we're growing ups. And that just won't cut it in today's the same. Especially if you work at a bank and you're all on break, no one's gonna fall for that. Here's what they do. Finish the bottle, then say to yourself, but out loud or muse, gee, that's a very heavy for an empty bottle.

Feel that, everyone. People have a fascination for the weight of an empty bottle and an unusually heavy bottle or can. They'll feel it and as soon as they've got their hands on it you just walk away. I am driving along the other day, heard a new company launching, oh no, that might be new, it's first time I've heard of them, easy turf. It sounds like they'd be established. You could easily imagine established 1978.

You could also easily imagine, here we are, establish this year. They've made... Let me give you more information and see where you want to pitch the year that they commenced. They make life like grass. There'll be five years old. But it's artificial. Because I recently bought a circle of turf for my backyard. So going to the trampoline, where all the grass was dying.

Like the polish. I like the polish. Best you can get. Oh gosh. You know, I know the radio money's run out, but I squirtle a bit away for a rainy day. And thankfully, I did think it's now, if you squint and zip your head past our yard very, very quickly,

you can't tell the difference between the normal yard lawn and the turf I've got under the trampoline, which is dying. So it's not cheap. It sets you back at, but the quality is incredible. I almost want to do the whole, we only have about five square meters of backyard, but I almost want to do the whole thing in turf. That interests me. That is not cheap. Because for the best stuff, you know. When I was, and I'm sure easy turf to do a quality of. It's like two pays. You're right. The two pay of a lawn. Yeah. Like it's your house's two pay, you can spot a cheap one, but the really expensive stuff,

you wouldn't even know. You got a tile end to do it. Yeah, because it's still $15,000, but like, all right, well, you know, that's a very good quality. The reason why I bring up this company is I heard the jingle at the end and I was like, it's fine. Yep. And you would always talk about.

We have fantasized about as a steady job. Yeah. We are pretty confident we could write gingles. Exactly. You saw what we did for the surfing song. Yeah, exactly. So I thought to myself, hey, what if I came in and just knocked out three gingles and I'll include the easy turf jingle in there, right? Are you doing a cover of theirs? No. So I'll be able to tell their gingles. No, that's my point. I haven't used me seeing them. I've gotten used to other people to sing up to make jingles. This is the most effort that anyone's putting in terms of shows. Jack, you're involved as well. What I want to

play you three jingles. One of them is the real easy turf jingle. If you guys can pick the real easy turf jingle, many will spend EasyTurf. They're good. But if you can't, maybe EasyTurf shouldn't be spending as much money on their jingle as they have. And we're a step closer to realizing our fantasy, which is running our jingle ranch, where people just send in their product, and if we're in the mood, we do a jingle. Exactly. I still think we should start the ranch, but this might give us a bit of extra confidence.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Jingle one. EasyJerf.com.au or call 1-800-BZJerf. The greatest green. You've ever seen in your life. For what is worth, get easy to. That's worthy. That's long.

I couldn't quite understand if you were the lyrics. I couldn't quite understand it. Is it the greatest, greatest green you've ever seen? Hmm. Was that it? The greenest green you've ever seen in your life. It sounded real to me. I sounded well-produced. But I wonder It's too long for radiating. We know there's a 30 second time constraint. I mean, what else you need to say about turf though? Anyway, okay, number two. Easy turf.com.au or call 1-800-EZ-Turk. It's easy, big green with easy turf.

I think that could be the real one. Number three. Easy turf.com.au or call 1-800-EZ-Turk. Just like grass, mud, mow, quail, and it's gotta be. Easy turf. That's an Andy Lee special. That's big band. I was in the high school big band feel.

That's an Andy Lee. I think we can. Okay, got set up and I'll reveal you are correct. That was not easy to single. But now you've got to decide. I believe, I believe, I mean, my issue with the first one was I couldn't quite understand. It just felt long. Yeah.

And I know that's an unfair rule to apply to this because I'm using insider information, but you can't... It almost felt like... You're never out of course. You might not have enough time to get your deals out. Well, it can't be like, you know, come on down to North Shore Ness and find out what you are missing. At North Shore Nessness and Ita Mission

to give you the best deal around. That's including all of the town. Sub-Event made for the choices. You could have said to us, it can't be a long time. It can't be too long. The thing is. I think the middle, I think the very short one was there, but I agree with you.

It's not correct. It's not correct. It's not correct. It's not great. It's not great. It is, it doesn't even rhyme or anything. No, I think they are going for a play one of its not easy being grain, which is coming with the frog's catchphrase. And so there's going to be extra level.

Let's have another listen to that one, Jack. EasyTurf.com.au or call 1-800-EZTurf. Easy being grain, easy turf. That's the... They should have put an emphasis on it is easy being green. Which they probably got on the whiteboard and then it got lost in translation when the singer came. Yeah, they're right, Jack.

They shouldn't have... So what you've discovered here, Andy, is a poorly executed play on words. Yeah, from the easy turf side of the fence. As part of our side company jingle ranch Yeah, would we allow businesses to send us their jingle that they've already made and we'll just point out where we think it could be improved Yeah, Jack's emphasis issue there would be great. Yeah, we're never enough to head to the studio Yeah, we like we easy being great. Yeah easy turf easy

Easy turf. Easy turf. Yeah. Easy turf. And we've already had a jam packed episode when it comes to our... I'm nervous to be doing something additional. We're right on the buzzer. We're right on the buzzer here. And I, in the team, huddle, I've gone, hey guys, I know we just got to defend our lead.

But, what about a trick play? We switch out the football for a basketball. No one will expect that. I don't know. Chance of ruining what we built thus far. Look, Catherine, I think you agree, took us on a wild ride. We were shopping. Yeah.

The shopping guestie. However, this is just counter-intention. I thought, would we quickly have a chat to another one of our Value of an important podcast love and names me look at got my attention. She's into state. So this is this is I got no further plans for me be it flying her anywhere Testing anything just because I want to run it path here and see where your vibes hit something. I like it.

Something that this made my antenna tingle. Her special skills list is microwaving. She can tell how many minutes slash seconds any food item needs in the microwave to be the perfect temperature for the average human. And this is her bold climb. Yeah, wow. She has never had to go back and reheat her food

after the first attempt. But is she going too hot? So many questions. Of course, keep putting in for an hour. You never have to go back. You'll never go back. You won't be able to eat it for two days. She joins us on the phone, Mia.

Oh, hoi. Oh, hoi, hoi. Oh, hoi. Mia, hoi. No need. Very good. Very excited that Heymish has bought this table. Well, it's certainly picked out attention here.

We've got a lot of questions I think when it comes to this. Can I ask you this now? Yeah. Yeah. Say it's a soup. And you've gone, okay, chicken noodle. Yes, the noodles will take slightly longer, but I don't see heavy vegetables in there.

It's all part of the calculus. Do you go, are you allowed to, obviously stir? Do you go, it's gonna need one minute, a stir and then 40 seconds? Yeah, you have to worry about the stir? Do you go, it's gonna need one minute, a stir, and then 40 seconds? Yeah, you have to worry about stir. Oh, okay, good, good, good, good. Well, that's the same thing. What about a can, like a Campbell's chicken noodle soup?

One full can, what would you say for that? How would you hate that? I reckon I'd go one minute, and then I'd do a stir, and then I'd do like, probably an extra like 45 seconds. Oh, sounds like a good one. Sounds like a good seconds. You're not just repeating what I said though. You did have five, you had a five. The master, she's the master. I'm just a lady.

I'm just a lady man. I'm just a man on the street. Not an issue. Wait too cool. Me is. What? You have to think that there so many different variables. Well, that's your skill. That's what we want to do.

He's the painter. Is it in? Container. It's in a ceramic bowl. And what time is microwaved yet? Well, that was a question. I don't know. That was the question I wanted to ask me. Are you good across all microwaves? If I said to you, I've got a 500 watt microwave. I don't know if that's good or bad, but I know they measured in watts. What would you say about that? Well, that's like my microwave is like 1,100.

Oh, OK, my dad has a Volkswagen Turic. Almost the top of the top. Top, it's a percent. That's a percent. But sorry, Mia, you can't meet up. My dad has an almost top of the range, 2,014%. So we'll have impressive things in our lives. Sorry, how much was your wattage? My, I tricked my mind, like a thousand. A thousand, a thousand. So, I almost had a double habe.

I don't have a 500 mic, I don't have a 100 mic. Hey, meh, this is interesting because, say, going to my, to my house, new microwave, in fact I had to give mine away on the radio show just recently. Did you put in fake yours? No, no, you played a game for my kitchen items. That's right. And you know I honor everybody on the show.

Last year, yeah, I had to. How much? I had to jack with these BSB, Frank Deep Hell bits. So I had to. How much Jack with his BSB, Frank T-Pel, yes. So I had to give my microwave away. So I got a new one. Go round in my mom's house to very different microwave game. She said she's running the same one we had

since they came out in the late 80s. Me, you reckon you're good across all microwaves. Yeah, well, I if I know what the microwave is, I would know that you need an add time on tech way time. Brilliant. How would you heat up? I got leftover barbecue sausages currently in the fridge at my house. Yep. I think you got about four. How would you heat up two, I want two sausages

as a snack, but I want them hot and I want them as close to barbecue quality as possible. I know that's impossible. With a microwave sausage. How would you use in your microwave heat up to X-bulberry sausages? Probably like like 30, 37 seconds maybe. 37. That's good. And they're both going in at the same time? Yeah, both at the same time, but you have to separate them slightly. Glad wrap on top that. Yeah, oh no, I just saved them as it is. Yeah, we're glad we're happy. Well, dirty, dirty, dirty Markwife with the splatter. Anyway, that's... Oh, no. Disgusting. Not everyone puts drum sheets down every time they're microwaves, I think it's something. Do you want to try and get me a... She's I'd like to see this live. I'd like to see it, but we'd have to fly with your microwave. No, no, she's saying she can do any

microwave. Oh, you can do any microwave. Are you can do any microwave? I think so. As long as she knows so what if you told us the wattage you know She just comes down. She'll have a look at a microwave the way I'm vibing it is she can walk in looking at my Player looking at a pitch. Yeah, she walk into look at the microwave. She'll go. Yeah, I can play this this pitch Well, I'm just this and me let's do that I'd love to get in love. I'd love to see it live That's trying How busy are you? Yeah, you fly out of it. Not busy that, not that busy. Like Amy. I'll also find the time to be there. Okay, well that's because I've got a lot

more questions that will save them until we have you in live. We hope to see you next week. We'll get to start. Do you know what? Because I'm just thinking about you, like, traditionally, because we record this still at the old radio station building we used to be in, but we just downstairs in a dungeon where they shove the podcast. Yeah. But traditionally, a workplace microwave or always the cheapest worst.

Yeah, that smaller. That smaller, they're always probably half the power of a home microwave. So we'll try, I'll try and So I'll try and get a thousand water. Oh, yeah. So not mine. Not amateurs. I'm just, you know, I just would hate me to get here and say, oh, this, I know these, these were made in one year in North Korea and they're like 14, what microwaves.

We will see you next week, hopefully, if not in a couple of weeks. And thanks very much for joining us. No worries, thanks for having us. Thanks mate. See everybody next week. It's a great way to finish here. What a tasty delight for people to come back. 37 things I'm trying that for the sausages.

So that result will be on the next show too. Yeah. For real. Thanks for listening. The Hamish Nandy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamishanandie.com.