Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2018 Ep 9

Episode Date: April 25, 2018

1. Horgs’ stolen car2. The Letter Man3. Learning to surf update4. Chit Chat Champion5. Sonny’s super heroes6. Power moves...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 A list-snap production. Activate your internet. Cos the Hamish and the Podcast starts in 3, 2, sorry, still buffering. 1. Tesh, tesh, tesh! How are we this morning? I feel like your mouth didn't enjoy it. I've made you that sound.
Starting point is 00:00:31 You didn't even have a time I spent on Google trying to get that. It's tough. That's polish. That's polish. That is polish as we do a tour of the globe. Um, I'm not invited to a tour of the globe. No country is so far as asked us to do their intro. But you invited me to do it.
Starting point is 00:00:48 I did invite you to do an ando, so. I'm going through every language in the world, the equivalent of the aloe aloe, aloe, which is said by British bobbies. Tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh. Tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, Tesh, T not going to because you haven't pleased me at training this week, but I will leave the ball on the bench and I will go over here and talk to some of my assistant coaches. And if I turn around the ball's gone and you got it, well be the first good thing you've
Starting point is 00:01:36 done at training all week. And I've got the ball. And Andy has the ball. Okay, it starts off a bit golfy. Why did I throw you the ball? If I'd known it was a golf ball, I was throwing you. But just bear with me, okay? I'm playing a side bit of news for golf for you.
Starting point is 00:01:56 I'm toying with the idea of taking it up at 40. Nothing solid yet. So when are you going to fill in your surfing? Yeah, well, I guess I have to learn, I've got four years to learn surfing. And then I can surf. Switch to golf. During summer, and golf might be my autumn and spring sport, and I'll need a winter pastime, which could be woodwitling, or some sort of form of woodwork.
Starting point is 00:02:20 Well, if there's ever been a reason to stay tuned to this podcast. Will Hamish's four-year plan to entertain the idea of playing golf crystallize or evaporate? We don't know. It's in liquid form now. Will it solidify? I made steam away. Like so many of these other dreams. Hey, and there was a a golfer who stuffed these round completely, one of the big championships by hitting into the water a lot sort of and a friend of mine sent around a picture of me essentially of the water boy from Adam Sandler that had
Starting point is 00:02:55 superimposed this golfers face. I'm looking for a warm and up. I'm looking forward to getting those in four years' time. At that point, I just wrote back, you know, at a bigotry like laughing face, like. I hope not the wrong. The tears coming out. Yeah, probably was. You should have just said that Paulite's mark. Because that's kind of all that's worth.
Starting point is 00:03:17 Yes. I wrote back a day later to that. It was a bit late and I was like, I said, I'm back in emoji a day later. Yeah, I just felt like, I shouldn't have gotten back to people. And then Hawks, just the emoji. Yeah, a good mate of mine, Hawks and ass. Is that a palmy?
Starting point is 00:03:31 I thought about this for a day. He got me. And then Hawks, all he writes back is, all my car's been stolen. So I hope you're not laughing about that. Right, it's on a group text. Everyone suddenly writes, what's happening, what's happened, Hawks?
Starting point is 00:03:53 And I wrote, don't tell us, because I want to find out on the podcast. I think. So I've held on to this for two days. I don't know what's happened to Hogs' car. Normally when something like this. The inappropriate behaviour in this equation is just flipping around all over the place.
Starting point is 00:04:11 Because first of all, I go, hey Hogs, no one's like, you've bought up your car. No one, this is a golf meme in emoji response transaction. Even though it took a day, no one's, this isn't about your car. But for the end of you to go, hey mate, sorry to hear about your car,
Starting point is 00:04:24 but now I want wanna use that story for my own amusement and that of the people. Yep. And that's probably the right thing to do. So let's give him a buzz now. Normally when, you know, there's many catastrophes that happen to hold. I got a fair bit of money on this,
Starting point is 00:04:38 it not being stolen or it being his fault. Well, he left the thing. Normally it's his fault. But to remind listeners, the last time he thought his car was stolen, he packed his twins in the back and a friend of theirs and ran inside to the party to see if another one of them made to where it had come. And had accidentally left the car in reverse and so it had gone over four laneways.
Starting point is 00:05:01 No, into a Porsche. Four laneways and a cross traffic. Sorry, I was just thinking of your house and he has a head. Porsche has parked out the front of his house. He calls his head. So this is the level we get from Hawke. You got the number there, Jacko? Let's put it in. BEEP BEEP
Starting point is 00:05:18 One of his phones has been stolen. No, he's gone all. Oxbink. Hawke's a tamey handy here. How are you holding on? Hawke's, all. Oxbing. Our hogs are tamey and handy here. How are you hogging? Hugs, I heard about the meme, the funny water boy meme. I've been heard about your anger that people dare laugh in this dark time. That you had a friendship group that was having a ball at the same time that you were down
Starting point is 00:05:47 one car. Hogs, are you still down a car? Yeah, I'm overing everywhere at the moment. So you carry a stolen car? A stolen car. Was it an Amarok? Yeah. Okay, so this is now turning to Crime Stoppers.
Starting point is 00:06:02 We're creating a lot of people see you're ice peeing. We have a lot of people listening to podcasts, a lot of them commuting. Yeah. Look left, look right. A lot of the first three letters of the Regio hogs. A cariner here, I see. I see, I see.
Starting point is 00:06:17 I see. The lazy one, everyone can remember out there. So hogs has the car being found. It has. Okay. So, Horg says the car being found. Uh, in a hat. Okay. A poloing you, so everyone, we just spent the last 30 seconds scanning the immediate area, hoping there'd be a reward. Hopefully people didn't pause their podcast and go out on the crusade.
Starting point is 00:06:40 Hopefully there's not another Amaroque with ACA, is there another one? Okay, so what happened Hawks? Well, basically... Is it your fault? Probably. Okay. What happened? Well, I actually last...like a week or so ago, my car got broken into Because I left it unlocked
Starting point is 00:07:06 Okay, and I checked the car got entered. Yeah easy break and enter The middle compartment I Didn't leave anything there but my spare keys are in the middle car I don't believe I didn't steal the Fueled car I have to with anyway Two weeks later leave the car out the front end, forget to lock it and... LAUGHTER
Starting point is 00:07:31 Really? Keep in a memory chance. When, uh, every... When out the front on Saturday morning. And the car wasn't there. Oh, my God. How did we get the bloody keach? Yeah, yeah, right.
Starting point is 00:07:45 OK, so that was that. What any of you's backies? Why are you so allergic to locking the car? It's so easy to lock a car. Oh, not wet. If you get two bags, you've got to carry out of the car. You've got to remember then when you put the bags down inside, you've got to come back out.
Starting point is 00:08:03 So, yeah. Yeah, that's fair enough. It does happen, but I mean, yeah, it just seems like, I mean, would you say you lock your car more than you don't? Oh, 70%. Oh gosh. So now you've got the car back and people know it's an emerald ACA, if they're actually going and stealing one.
Starting point is 00:08:22 If you're someone who's overbills getting a bit high, you're not doing Dagen the Bar, so you're not interested in one of those go get car share things. If you are lucky enough to live near Hawks, he's running an unofficial car sharing program. So what did the thief do with the car? Well, they crashed into a poll.
Starting point is 00:08:41 Yeah, all right. That's just a classic. If you didn't earn it, you don't respect it. You know, you know, that's a sense of someone just gets something for nothing that I treat it well. Exactly. It's like when you get a free concert ticket, you often leave early. Yeah. Free jumper, spilt sauce on it, who cares? And they've done the same thing with your car. And they, I bet they did, they don't respect for the pole either. Well, I'm glad you got it back, Hawks and then that uh... actually on
Starting point is 00:09:05 on monday morning police over three new calls from the police are private number had to listen to the messages uh... i can't believe it's called me three times at five thirty in the morning and kate said well most people want to know where they're coming. I'm not going to. It's a good point. You can't ever go to the company doing their job too well.
Starting point is 00:09:30 So he's all the respectable hour. Guys, come over when I'm ready. Is it right off? Can we first go? I'm sorry. This is sounding more like an insurance job. No one but he doesn't like his car. Oh, there's a trail of M&Ms to the centre console.
Starting point is 00:09:53 No one finds them. Thanks mate. No one's here. Oh, I'm sorry. Hey, we have a lot of great listeners on but I'm not a fan of the word. I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, but I'm not a fan of the word, and hamishjani.com because they want to be more involved. You know when someone says two sayings that jump to mind,
Starting point is 00:10:26 relate both relating to cream. One is, you know, you skim the cream off the top of the milk. That's the best bit of the milk. Is creme de la creme the cream of the cream? The cream of the, is that the best cream of the cream? Because I'd say those around valued and important podcasts. Yes, they're the creme de la creme.
Starting point is 00:10:41 They're the cream of the top of the cream. Cream's cream. Ethan is one of those. Yeah. And he filled out the form. And people know that they can be, they can get a ancient acoin. Yeah. Value to the approximately 10,000 bucks. It's a bit pouncy around a bit.
Starting point is 00:10:57 Buckshoes, but it stands right there on the coin. It equals one bit coin. So whatever bit coin is that day, that's what you've, that's what you've got in your hand. If they participate, I'm gonna say up front now, for Ethan's sake, he's going for a coin. Wow. But more accurately though, his father is. His father is.
Starting point is 00:11:12 He said, I'd love to nominate my father. He can tell how many letters are in any word straight away. It's definitely a superpower worth testing. We agree, and so we're gonna test it. Kim is Ethan's dad. Kim, welcome. Hi, dad boys. Hi, Jim. Thank you for taking the time. Welcome. You are the first father to be on the podcast has nominated by a son.
Starting point is 00:11:36 Now you've started with a hoi, which is our preferred telephonic greeting. Were you told to say that by your son, or a US secret podcaster as well. We did debrief. We did have a bit of a briefing because I wasn't actually aware that my superhero talent was about to be uncovered. But that's a good average. Okay. That's true in most films. I mean, Superman will often walk past a disaster suddenly happening and then he has to spring into action.
Starting point is 00:12:00 He doesn't get a call two weeks in advance at the villains coming. One of the rules about being a superhero here is you got to be adaptable you got to you got to move for the times can have you always known you could how you could do this this this trick this talent this super power of of hearing a word and knowing how many letters are in it when you find out you could do it so I've been kind of doing it in my head for years probably ten or fifteen years try to find a way to make the, you know, find a way that the super power could probably be used for good instead of evil.
Starting point is 00:12:29 I'm commercialised. I haven't. And I haven't actually found a way where that can happen. How are you using it stuck in my head, using it from the find a way? How are you using it for evil? It's wasting you, start. I might have a suggestion. Why, I mean, it is, it would be, is it frustrating?
Starting point is 00:12:45 I mean, because again, the simulator is Superman's Batman. You can't turn the power off. Are you just key words all day long? Like we would have just sent to you podcast then. It's like you're living in the Matrix. Just streams and numbers. And... Whoa!
Starting point is 00:13:04 Oh, we're getting a taste. Let's get into it. I'll just scratch any of the three and four little words of our No, we're gonna start actually I do have a kryptonite I discovered the other night my brother-in-law said dog and I said four and I went well there's my kryptonite right Too easy soft balls. Let's not adjust the game And they only wait for we're hearing I mean this is like we've seen him in batting practice eating sixes left, right? And so you're going to fastball him. But that's interesting that the easy stuff challenges you. People will be familiar in tabletop and it's
Starting point is 00:13:33 a good, if you're often playing someone, it's better than you. You're just, you lob, no, but you lob the ball them, give them the easy smash. They panic and hit it off the table. Kim, let's jump into this. The way it's going to work is we're gonna, we've got five words. Did you get four out of five correct?
Starting point is 00:13:49 Your son will get an HNA coin and... This is about a big deal by the way. Let's jump into it. He smiles and says that his name is Kim. But we know him as the Letterman. Letterman there, just in case you feel he'll call you a multi-toy. Letterman, I've been trying to think of it, the Letterman! Letterman there, just in case you could, you'll call it a multi-tall. I like that. Letterman, I've been trying to think of it now.
Starting point is 00:14:08 Letterman. You're a Letterman. Not the Leatherman. Okay, Kim, the first... You're going to have pliers at your core. The first word is... Dury. Four.
Starting point is 00:14:19 Yep, that was easy. That was easy, though. That was easy, though, though, for you could be in the hardest. You could be over the tallest hurdle Second word Cantalope Nine. Oh my god. Oh my god. Okay. He's good. He's good I mean, but Annie you say he's good, but he could have just memorized every word in the English language I'm the corresponding numbers. He could be an element of that
Starting point is 00:14:40 He could be gee. He could have just stayed up one night read the whole dictionary memorise over what is it easy? If I can spell it, I can generally say it So if I hesitate it's because I'm trying to work it out of spell it. Right, okay, no problem. That's still quick. Still quick, your third word is generation. Ten. Two. This is insane. Okay.
Starting point is 00:14:59 You must be writing these down so fast. Okay, fourth word, in cyclopedia. Third word. Oh! Unless we've counted it wrong. Yeah. And now I'm down again. I'm counting now.
Starting point is 00:15:17 We've got it down to 12. Hang up one, two, three. Oh, that's a six. I'm going to live in 12. Yeah, okay. This makes it, this is exciting. Do you agree, do you agree that it's 12 now on reflection, Kim? I'm thinking maybe I've spelled it wrong.
Starting point is 00:15:29 Okay. Kim, this is actually made it exciting though. We said you needed to get four out of five. It means if you get the next one correct, your son Ethan walks away with an 8-day coin, the letter man. This are the type of shots that define the player. This is where the cream of the cream can denser into an even more delicious, fatier, denser white product, the cream of the cream of the cream. Yes. Your word is Memorandum. 11.
Starting point is 00:16:06 Oh, no. 10 mil tea cream. Sorry, 10. Kim, you were out in front of the marathon, but about 400 meters. And then suddenly you started to stumble. This isn't real. I would like to stay. I would like to stage a protest, though. Yes.
Starting point is 00:16:23 How do we spell encyclopedia? I would like to stage a protest though. Yes. How do we spell encyclopedia? Always. ENCY, C-L-O-P-E-D-I-A. Isn't it? A-E-D-I-A? Two.
Starting point is 00:16:35 There's two ways to spell it. Hang on a sec. He's got a set of... Hang on a sec. Hang on a sec. How fast fingers are going. Hey, if you type that in, will we accept what Microsoft Word likes.
Starting point is 00:16:47 No, that could be American. If you can spell it the other way, I think we have to give it to Kim. You can certainly spell it the way we just spelled it. Yeah, maybe we have to Google it. Jack? Jack, I'm saying in the dictionary definition, it has both spellings, including...
Starting point is 00:17:01 Peace, mate! Oh, I'm so sorry. Peace, mate! Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, I'm so sorry. both spellings including... He's done it! He's done it! He's done it! He's done it! He's done it! Not the classiest way to do it! But it doesn't matter
Starting point is 00:17:16 because the record books will show that you won one coin and no one will remember that it was through a legal protest Kim Weldon, that is... You know how to create excitement. And how many letters in excitement? Ten. Yeah, probably. How many and probably?
Starting point is 00:17:36 Eight probably again. Got your Kim. Thanks. No worries, thank you. And as the weeks tick by, we are working on a very, very special project here at the Hamish and Eddie podcast, as conceptually endorsed by two world champions. Surfers, yeah. Two world champion surfers.
Starting point is 00:17:57 If you've been listening, you would know that we are working on our song about learning to surf. It is a gaping market. Can't think of a famous song about learning to surf. Certainly hasn't been one in a while. The beach boy said let's go surfing now. Everybody's learning how come on a safari with me, but it was certainly assumed that everyone had already learned and they're often surfing. That's not the stage of the continuum we're at. Exactly. We're interested future customers. If everybody's learning how, you're, we're all those. We're interested future customers.
Starting point is 00:18:25 If everybody's learning how, you've already got them. Yep. And once you are learning the surf, then you've, then you're picking up Lingo. You know Sean, he's your instructor. Like you're just in it. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:37 We're not, this is about thinking about learning to surf. We're very much on the fence. And we don't know when it will happen. And then we're heading into winter. So it's probably not going to happen for us anytime soon. Which gives us plenty of time to work on the song to we don't know when it will happen and we're heading into winter. So it's probably not going to happen for us any time soon. Which gives us plenty of time to work on the song to convince ourselves that when some are learned around, rolls around, let's learn to surf. What we wanted to do is get all the concepts of first learning to surf. Mick Fanning, of course, former World Champion, just recently retired,
Starting point is 00:18:59 he had this to say. When they start, you know, learning to get get up, I have to go one knee up first or straight to your feet. Which one is the good one? Straight to your feet, step up. Yep, right. So we know that that could be a possible lyrics. Just the preference of getting straight to your feet. I've got a bit of a lyric we could make out of that, because at the moment we, again, we've been listening and I know a lot of people listening chronologically. I'm sorry, you have your g of that because at the moment we again we've been listening and a lot I know a lot of people listen chronologically. I'm sorry, I have a giggle because your lyrics haven't been great today That's because I was just chucking stuff out without giving you the thing. Okay, this is a bit of it more of a thing This comes out the end of a thinking tunnel
Starting point is 00:19:37 How long was I in the tunnel not long but I went through and something happened to me in there and now coming out the other end We prefer them when they're in the I've been through the thinking tunnel and this is this is what I came up with last night. Can I before you go This is why I don't think you're lyrics of that good. I feel like you're rhyme the first part of the rhyme is always deliberate and Shoe horned in fit the same like you know, don't set home watching the smurfing like watching the smurfs And you're like well, I think we know it's coming up in the next lyric. You mean that? That's what I mean. Like, you just, you can tell what the second rhyme will be.
Starting point is 00:20:09 Yeah, because of the first. Not guilty of that in this instance. Let's have a look. I just want to stress the people that anything we've said to this point has never been a lyric. We're a concept stage yet. The exact combination of words we've been using shouldn't appear in the song. Yes, because they're not lyrics, they're just concepts, which we then boil down overnight. Take it through a thinking tunnel.
Starting point is 00:20:30 Come out here. You got a nice little kernel of a two, two mix point. Have you want to jump straight up onto your feet? Not go up one knee at a time. Some sort of lyric to be like, Hey, let's be a two feet Tony, not a one knee-none. Oh. You know, you wanna be a two feet Tony. No, no, I don't think. If Mick Fanny had said,
Starting point is 00:20:56 you wanna be a two feet Tony. Oh my god. All right, so you just wanna write a song and take no chances. You just wanna only put in stuff that everyone else has said. I want us to invent new conversations and new phrases. Anyway, not anyway. Let's take some risks. Let's invent our own lingo. I'm happy to, but
Starting point is 00:21:16 that's not the risk I want to take. I think I think going, all right, let's be two feet toning. Stop saying it. I know you're tricky. It's catching on. No, it's not. You're acting like a 1-N-O-N-E. Who's playing it safe? Where I am a two feet Tony, he jumps straight to his feet and sees what happens. Let's be two feet Tony's about this lyric.
Starting point is 00:21:34 You've wiped out. See, that's someone else's tip. No, I bet you in future weeks, whether you were a dog, this lyric or not, people will start to use the term two feet turning or one knee. No, any for playing. He doesn't surprise me because you are a one knee-no knee. You're a cautious man.
Starting point is 00:21:53 And I'm a little bit faster and looser like a two feet turning. Jack's taking me. He said. Yeah, because he's dancing. He's enjoying this so much. No, you let him get away with saying it too much and then it becomes an actual thing. You can't stop him. We all know what he's doing, Jack.
Starting point is 00:22:08 It's just, and it's all let me punch myself out. LAUGHTER Um, hey, let me go through the concepts, um, aside from getting up, using preferably two feet. Er, let me go through the concepts that are already in the mix. Yeah. Um, we're worried about the mornings will be cold. Yeah, definitely temperature fear is a huge issue, especially for lower states in Australia.
Starting point is 00:22:33 Lane Beachley said respect the lineup. Yeah, that was it. That was, that actually made us all sit up and pay attention because one of the big things we're scared about is getting bashed and having someone yell local's only at us. But we don't live near a surf break. So we need to know how we can go to a break and respect the local gangs essentially. I just wondered where the,
Starting point is 00:22:53 do we need a definition of lineup? In the song? Yes. Song with a footnote. Just wondered because has this ever been done? You know more about music than I do. You do, verse verse chorus verse chorus But in the first two verses we're doing all this lingo. Yeah line up two feet Tony
Starting point is 00:23:12 The last verse is a bibliography The last versus footnotes and it explains some of the terms you might have heard earlier in the song That's a good idea at At least, I think that now that now were... That's a good idea. That's a good idea. And to be Tony was so scored. That now were onto something. Now it's okay.
Starting point is 00:23:32 It will be the first song. Even if this song's not a massive hit, we will have the first song ever that has a bibliography or an index, a definition section as the last verse. It just has like a tailing off type thing. Yeah, it's good. The zip is predominantly at the back of your wetsuit.
Starting point is 00:23:48 I think she said that's so castically. I think it's always at the back, isn't it? I know some of the shoulders. You got the zip across the front of the front. I'm only saying that because we got given those free wetsuits. Yeah. Have the playfulness of a child is what she said as well. It's true. That kind of cuts the heart of it as a pastime.
Starting point is 00:24:04 Anyway, you're out in the ocean. You're enjoying it. That team has chorus feel to it. Can't be the hook. Okay. But it could be sub, could be pre-opost hook. Okay. Hold your breath for over eight seconds.
Starting point is 00:24:16 We're gonna have a hold your breath instrumental. Yeah. So that's all the concepts. That's all the concepts. We're gonna have Kelly Slater on the show next week. Yeah, cause in my head I've still got a few more. Yeah. What did she say about driving to the...
Starting point is 00:24:28 Oh, yes. You can drive. You can drive. You can drive to the ocean with your wet suit on, but just not the top half, just the bottom half. Now that could be a lyric. Yeah, well, yeah, absolutely. That should be perfect.
Starting point is 00:24:40 And that's exactly what you said. Yeah. You just put that to music. You can drive to the ocean with you What's it on the just bottom half not your top off? Yeah, it's nice Okay, so all then when you're in the line up remember it's bad having the placefulness of a child and having a laugh Yes, that rhymes with top off Jack any one of you contributed
Starting point is 00:25:03 You don't do anything anymore. There's not any buttons to push, by the way. There's no songs. What do you do? What do you do? Someone's got to say it. I just think. I mean, what does he do, Andy?
Starting point is 00:25:19 He's open there. He's lying and groaning like, Why don't you have the Why do we look like that? Why do we look happy with the free drugs here? And just why do we invite this teenager into just like, be role their eyes at Mum and Dad? Who are trying to run the family business which is riding surf songs?
Starting point is 00:25:35 Give me one line in the song and I'll do it. That, to me, speaks volumes. Give me one line. Give me, give me like a, give me my Indian eye over here, trying to do a hundred lines and you've opted for one I'll do one rhyming. Okay, the sand's hot sometimes. Oh, I was gonna go away and work on it over the week Get through two toll points. It's like there's ones in Europe that go from New Zealand to Austria.
Starting point is 00:26:12 I'm having a request to play this game again. Sorry. Shitty with your best chat! That was a bad way! Shit chat, champion! It's not going to be a single channel. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa but you could have gone, well we still do play sound effects. Glad you didn't fight back because then minutes later, you've just been caught completely flat footed again. Chichachampions, if you think you are good at chatting,
Starting point is 00:26:52 you'd be the perfect person to take as a plus one, do any social event, particularly if the person that you're going as a plus one with has duties, like hastin, make off and do a speech or something. If there's a human left on your own, big chance that you're gonna be in a room talking to some suits, maybe some Arnie's uncles. You pride yourself on being out of this.
Starting point is 00:27:15 A couple of things we like to look for here in this segment because we've devised the test to see if you're good at chit chat. You can pick the right time to enter a conversation and for people that haven't heard this before, we must stress that this is a test to see if you can kick the right time to enter a conversation and for people that haven't heard this before, we must stress this is a test to see if you can kick the conversation along in an interesting manner, it's not about being funny. No. Statements rather than questions. Because you're new to the group, you're new to the group, no one likes someone that comes in and throws out a B plus word play
Starting point is 00:27:42 because it leaves an awkward pause and it makes it harder for chat to happen after that. The real fertilizer of chat is an interesting kick a lot. Renee, you think you're good at your chat? What kind of work do you do? Hi, I'm a teacher. Oh, it has to be. Of course. Yeah. Most of your job is keeping the chat up back. Of course, of course. I use high school or primary school? High school, but I did specifically say in my form that that I have access to my Husband who would be a boss at CheatChampion. I mean I could definitely play, but my husband would totally smash this competition. Rana, we want to give you a shot. I'm sick of you losing it living in his shadow.
Starting point is 00:28:18 Yeah, okay great. If you don't reign supreme, we'll get your husband back on. Yeah, okay great. In future weeks, you're up against John today. John, welcome back to the husband. Yeah, I know. How are you, John? You're not Renee's husband. John, what do you do?
Starting point is 00:28:32 What's your job? What's your line of work? I'm a swim coach. I'm a swim coach. You've got to keep the chat up. Yep, with parents coming in. Like the one mate. Motivate.
Starting point is 00:28:40 Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Motivate. I see. You reckon that you'll probably head towards motivation for any type of chat no matter what the conversation. I just like to make people feel good about what they're doing. Okay, that's a really good quality for a chitchat champion to have. All right, we're going to put John on hold so he cannot hear Renee.
Starting point is 00:28:56 John can't hear Renee's attempt here. Now guys, you're going to get exactly the same prelude to your moment. It is, you will be judged on how you're timing is, as is always the case here. And he's going to start with an interesting thing he's seen in the news. I'll add to the conversation. When I stop, you must judge that it's time to jump in with your little bit. You're going to add to the conversation too. We then evaluate you based on, was it interesting and was your time and good? Good luck Renee. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:29:27 Oh, hi, Hannah. Hey, I heard that they are getting close to releasing a pill that can mimic the exact effects of exercise. Is that right? Well, I mean, it won't stop people wearing active wear around. People do like wearing mat but that's good. Wow that's really interesting I guess active wears really become a interesting thing out there. Oh no I told you I can't do this. Oh no I really thought you were calling to call my husband. Really? Right, right, right, yeah. I haven't lost yet.
Starting point is 00:30:07 I can't, I've technically have. No, I can't have it yet. You haven't yet. There's always a chance something horrible could happen to Johnny. He could, he might be, when we tell him that he's looking good. The glory of interest. He could dance around in his kitchen and slip on the floor and crack his head.
Starting point is 00:30:24 I would have to give it a little chance. It was when he used the word interesting. That's where we used it. In your first six words. Yeah, because your first interesting was a placeholder. Which is, it's a great move to make in a conversation. To buy some time, but you are taking out a mortgage. You will need to pay back the attention later
Starting point is 00:30:45 and when you reach for the word you need to use your placeholder again that was great but I we loved it okay we'll put you on hold with it and hold in incomes John John can you hear us? I can indeed John we will head into the party now and good luck no get a handkerchief John how's it going I know it's done hey mate I heard they're close to releasing and good luck. No, you know, Ham got a jump. How's it going? I heard they're close to releasing a pill, the gimmick, the exact, the, of exercise. Yeah, right. Jeez, that's interesting.
Starting point is 00:31:14 Hi, I'm, haha. That is interesting. I mean, I've got a few athletes myself that actually could do with that exercise and juice pill. It's a good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, to any girl who's interesting here to give any little smile because Renee used the word interesting a lot John and then I gave myself the girls and then I realized I'd failed on each agenda. We're rehearsed. We already had our go and we both went off script. I'm like John, you're the winner when you listen to this back you'll realize just by how far I'm by how much you've won. But Renee, you were brilliant. And you can have it the best of us. Hey, Michelle, I'm both fluffed at Stead off the back of you.
Starting point is 00:32:10 And, um, not saying it was your fault. But let's get your up. Let's get your half the songs. You have to, uh, to, uh, to look at. Hold on. Yeah, to see where he's in. He'll say something much more interesting than me. All right.
Starting point is 00:32:23 It's a good, it's a good little conversation, Rick. Worldwide YouTube. What on guys? What on guys? What on guys? What on guys? Ando, there's a lot of Marvel and DC comic franchises flying around at the moment. It's big business in the movie world.
Starting point is 00:32:41 So you can imagine my excitement when my son, Sonny has invented his own franchise. I see big things for. Yeah, right. I mean, Black Panther is just destroyed at the box office. Wonder Woman was probably the hitter last year. Sonny has invented his own superhero, which I suppose came about. There was just a, there's a black leather ladies glove lying around. I think it must have been Zo's glove. Sonny figured't forget to add a put this on and he became black glove. Like we've had black glove in our house
Starting point is 00:33:08 for a couple of weeks now. Black gloves are the same show we've had lettermen. Earlier on, we don't struggle to name them. We're good at naming things. We see things we name them. Black glove, if you ask him, what is powers, I when he puts the glove on, super strength, or the standards, super strength. The glove can become sticky when he needs it to be.
Starting point is 00:33:27 If he needs to lift up a car that's not easy to have an obvious handle. Or even a, probably more of like a rock, a big, smooth rock. It can be sticky and strength. He can then turn the stickiness off to throw the rock into the ocean. Right. Black lives, Ripper. Couple of days ago, Sonny just announced at the dinner table that there was some new additions to the Black Glove team.
Starting point is 00:33:47 Wow. Every one of them. Yeah, everyone else in the family, we became some sort of like a fantastic five, Justice League. We're a squad. Now we're a superhero squad. So that missing a baby's going around the table,
Starting point is 00:33:57 like naming everyone, I'm Iceman, which was like, thank you very much. I can shoot ice beams out. Rudy at the time was wearing a red hat, like she was in her heart, and see he's got Rudy's red hat. Okay, as a baby. So it's like, okay, we got Iceman red hat.
Starting point is 00:34:14 And then meowat walks past, he's fur boy. That makes sense, he's the cat. And so, I don't know how Zogue got this. Maybe she was sitting near the window, something else a weird reflection. She got blue face. Okay. It wasn't even wearing a blue top.
Starting point is 00:34:26 So he's like, right, your ice man, you freeze things. And so we go, yeah, what is red hat do you go, she throws unicorns. Wow. Which in me, at the start, you know, that's not really a super power, but you're like, but it's a unicorn. It's a magic and it's a shoe she has infinite supply of them.
Starting point is 00:34:39 Big ones are small ones. I guess small ones, because he's a baby. And she throwing them as weapons? Or is it like so? It doesn't as weapons or I don't restrict it. She could throw him as distractions, which it would distract you if someone threw a tiny unicorn you saw it gallop out the roof, you would go hang on a sec, I was going to steal that you could be a weapon. It was a huge one.
Starting point is 00:34:59 You give me enough time to escape. And so we go, right, that's cool, that's a cool power, what does Furboy do? And it's something like, he throws cats. So I think you're just borrowing a bit from Red Hat's super power there, but that's okay. Again, if someone's throwing small cats, it's gonna at least confuse you and distract you, especially if the supplies infinite.
Starting point is 00:35:18 Like if Miyabit is like a puss in boots character that has a small sack of infinite cats on his waist, and he's just throwing him a non-stop. Yeah. Keating to keep people with like them. It's a power. I mean, it does in the traditional sense of superpowers, it defies the laws of physics. And that's all we're after here in the team, and then it's about how you can creatively
Starting point is 00:35:36 use that to defeat your enemy. Who is the Joker, by the way? I don't know if there's an issue there with Marvel or D.C. whoever owns the Joker, but he's part of our universe as well. So there is a crossover. So then it gets to show. It was a big at the moment. Well, yeah, I mean, I don't,
Starting point is 00:35:50 we're not the legal stage yet. Like we haven't made the film yet, so. Okay. Then it gets to show. And I was like, oh, what's mummy? Have what does blueface do? And so he goes, she can squirt water. Where? And I go, oh, it's me.
Starting point is 00:36:01 I'm already going, correct. Because that sucks. Yeah. And then so he goes, well, no, I, I could better than that.. And then it goes, well, no, I get better than that. And then it goes, no, no, you squirt water, you squirt water, whenever we need you to, you can squirt water. You squirt it out of your mouth. I'm like, all right, so she spits it. So she's like dribbles.
Starting point is 00:36:18 Like she spits water. Like that says it about. So it's like, no, no, no, I would be, maybe I could be invisible. Then say, like, dig in these heels and going, no, blue face, spits water. I'm like, hey, blue face, you've got your power. You have to work with it.
Starting point is 00:36:29 We all, I give it to choose our powers. Like the X-Men doesn't, Wolverine doesn't want forks anymore. I want the red vision. Like you get what you're given. Yes. Like that's super powers, mate. So it's like, well, I was like, hey, you know, if we need someone to do a spit take or something, or if we're all like a bit hot, you can spit cool stuff.
Starting point is 00:36:47 Like you have, you're still part of the team. So is ropeable, right? Because she knows, ice man, really, what could ice man, like, why do we need blue face? Because if I can make ice, name a emergency that I can't handle, like it does feel like a bit of, like, hey, blue face, we're gonna go and do the thing, like, we'll let you know.
Starting point is 00:37:07 If we, we'll let you know if we need you, because if there's a fire, I'll obviously attack it with us. We don't need you to spill on it. Anything that really could be handled with water, I realistically could do with us, any emergency. Hydration that a pinch bit again. I'll just do it early and let it melt. Like, if you guys wouldn't need a drink after this,
Starting point is 00:37:26 why don't I just ice some glasses now? We'll go and do the five prime and by the time we get back it'll be an delicious ice-cold glass of water and it has been someone's mouth already. Right. So, pour our blue face. Yeah. She's having a shocker.
Starting point is 00:37:42 But what I thought I'd do is I've typed up a small promo here if we were to make this into a film. Oh great. Can I get you to do movie voice? Yes. Jack's got some Santa Feaks lined up. Jack you're in this as well. If you can line up Santa Fe as I mean,
Starting point is 00:37:54 it should be pretty easy, but at the end, cause we're gonna need blue face, well, I have to call Zoe during this. So he has those number line up as well, Jack. Yeah, I can do that. Okay, great. Let's get So, have Zoe's number line up. Okay, well, Jacko. Yeah, I can do that. Okay, great. Let's get everything together. Let's jump into it. [♪ Music playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing. Ah, it's okay, Black Glove is here! Yes, he will use his superpowers to save us! No matter the situation, there'll be something Black Glove and his heroes can do.
Starting point is 00:38:35 Red Hat, throw your unicorns! Incredible, such a rare animal and thrown with such accuracy! Furboy, throw your cats! The Joker is hating that! Hey! Iceman, watch out! Incoming missile! I got it! Activate freeze rate! There is literally no challenge the team cannot overcome. I know there's some wheat-bick stuck on the bench.
Starting point is 00:38:59 You just maybe need a little bit of water to loosen it up. Yeah, that's gonna make it easier to scratch off with an ale. Each team member is always briefly available to do their job. I'm not quite sure. What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:39:16 What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
Starting point is 00:39:24 What? What? What? What? Hello? Hi, honey, it's Iceman. What is that blue face? Yeah, it's a blue face. Yeah, we've got a real problem here. We've got some wheat big stuck on the bench when you need you to come and dribble some water out of your mouth on it. So I found it up so he can scratch it off with our nail. No, that's unfair. And I go best in the show.
Starting point is 00:39:42 Which come? I didn't want to be sleeping face. Come, come, hurry, we need you urgently. I mean, I could do it as I was saying, but it'd be nice to include you. No, it's okay. Didn't I switch to another secretory that I have with all the terrifes? No, you dribble water. High pressure dribble.
Starting point is 00:39:59 I guess even worse, because you know why a play face came from. Where? Because I had a face mom. Oh god, I'm pretty bad. It's good. Alright, see you later. We're in the middle of a trailer. Maybe a trailer. Okay, sure.
Starting point is 00:40:12 Alright, get back to it. Go, go, go. What a team. Black Glove and his band of superheroes, including Drivel Girl. Boyfaz. Sorry, Blueface. But yeah, it's spot on with her talent. MUSIC
Starting point is 00:40:30 I'm going to wrap up this week's podcast. We should touch on power moves again. So many great power moves coming in, haven't you, Danny? Well, I suppose I can't be angry. That happened. We did agree that that would be the sound effect. Jack, try to make up for some earlier slubbing us now with preemptive and premature sound effecting. You're impressing me on yourself, Jack. But again, we can't red flag you too hard
Starting point is 00:40:56 because we did ask for it last week. So many great palmots coming in, habitjandy.com. It seems to be an infinite well of tricks that people use to gain the advantage or to make themselves look superior in a situation where you wouldn't normally think you had that opportunity open to you. You can submit them in hamishney.com. There's a contact list there. I've got a couple for you actually.
Starting point is 00:41:18 Actually, I've got one that I think is definitely one and then I'd like to work out whether we think it's worth it. Well, can I just set the tone on one? Because I think this is like the almost the textbook power move. The move of going first at the pedestrian crossing. So seeing when it's about to, when you're about to get the green man, especially in city situations, if there's a lot of people, having the guts don't get too early will get run over, but having the guts to leap off before the green man,
Starting point is 00:41:44 and to go out in front has been listed as a power move because it makes you look like Moses leading people through the Red Sea. This isn't written down the power move, but I'd like to add this addition on. I don't, I mean, I have never tried this but I think it would work. You get out there early, turn around,
Starting point is 00:41:58 then yell, come on, everyone. And they have to come, because there's the green man And from Naomi She lives in a share house when people call and say hi as team there. That's her flatmate. Yep. She says yes They say could I speak to you then? She thinks is no. And pauses. Not a lot of people know what to do.
Starting point is 00:42:34 Yeah, that's good. And then for a little bit, she'll go, of course you can, then put them on, but they're completely rattled. I have a similar one. I don't know who it came in from, but I said when someone calls and goes, hey mate, you know, if you call someone, like, oh sorry I'm busy, can I call
Starting point is 00:42:47 you back? You say no. Really wrong for its people. Yeah, I'll call you back in five minutes. No, it has to be now. Okay, well they're like, but you do have to follow it, it's only pretty good. You're thinking for lunch. Yeah, so how was Byron?
Starting point is 00:43:07 This comes in from Will. He goes, could be a bit late on the power move thing. No, Will, we'll probably do it all year. He goes, this is someone else's power move, but I want to submit it anyway. He said, I've seen it done before. The move is making up a beef between two people, then checkmateing the person, the move is being made on.
Starting point is 00:43:25 It's all like that, I'm not confusing. He goes, well, this is best described in a scenario. So here, Simon is playing a power move on Dane. Okay? So it's like, if you have a textbook. Yeah, it sounds like how to learn power moves in another language. Right.
Starting point is 00:43:40 So Dane introduces the new arrival, Sarah to the group, because guys, this is Sarah. Everyone says, high Sarah. Simon, I remember who's playing the power move on Dane introduces the new arrival Sarah to the group because guys this is Sarah. Everyone says hi Sarah Simon, I remember who's playing the power move on Dane goes, haha. I'm surprised you bring Sarah after all the shit you've been saying about Dane has obviously not said anything to anyone about Sarah, but now Dane is completely locked if he questions Simon Which he would as he has no idea what he's talking about, he looks guilty. But if Simon's six to his story, game over.
Starting point is 00:44:11 Yes. That has an element of our soul about it. I've got three more before the asshole category. This is another one. Do you know how smooth? Pound moves basically, assholes and legends. Some pound moves, you're an asshole. Some you're a legend, some you both. These ones and these ones today.
Starting point is 00:44:38 Jared said, I like to suddenly tell someone they've got something on their face when they don't. And when they wipe it off? I say, yep, you got it. Yes. Aasol. Here's one from Zoe. If you're in a group and someone's being a bit too alpha, like getting all the attention, you ask them, have you been crying?
Starting point is 00:44:57 So have you been crying? They go, no, sorry, it just looks like you've been crying. And immediately everyone in the group is thinking, this guy's been crying. Here's another one, it's an asshole move. I can't remember who this came in from, and it's coming in a few different versions, but simply again, if you're in a group,
Starting point is 00:45:12 a lot of these in a group where people don't like the fact someone else has the highest status position. Somebody going, how's your ex? Because he rattles people. Because now they're thinking about their ex and they lose all their confidence. Keep them going. We'll take our souls, legends or both.
Starting point is 00:45:30 HamishDaddy.com. You can keep it coming in. If you want to fill out the value of an important podcast or form, that's a separate form. You can fill out that. You have to do a bit of a questionnaire. But any other pondering you have, just hit us up at the normal contact form. We'll catch you next week. We'll love it and thanks, guys.
Starting point is 00:45:56 you

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