Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2019 Ep 41

Episode Date: February 27, 2019

1. Jonathan Denholm2. Power Moves3. Coffee table book update4. H&A to the rescue 5. Bec's stuck6. Poppins Poppins Poppins7. Surprise for Jack8. Lord Kane

A list-knife production. Activate your internet. Cause the Hamish and Andy podcast starts in 3, 2, sorry, still buffering. One. Let the podcast commence. Oh no, I see what we've done. An interesting new world opens up before us. No more handbrake.

No, well, no more. There could be potentially handbrake. I did like the international theme. I know the podcast a lot about us. Welcome back, by the way, for graduating from the team, graduating back, happy March Eve. And if you're downloading this on the 28th of February, on the day it gets released.

And to all the listeners, thank you, but we talk about us a lot. I wanted to check in with some of them. Yeah. And so I emailed a guy from Islayne, called Stari, and I said, what are you gonna be up to today? Yep, on March Eve.

He came back with this. Hello, this is Stari from Iceland, although I'm currently in Amsterdam building a laddh for my girlfriend. I had to do something drastic since I'd forgotten to be short out both Christmas and Valentine's Day gifts for her. Better than a snake, always better than a snake if you have an option of the two. So we're going to do that now. I'm just gonna give you an update from one list of... We pick an internationalist. This is good.

I like it. Normally you do like listener stuff. Other podcasts do it like later in the show. Yeah, it's like you get through it up. You know that he's building a ladder. Don't know why that's making up. What an amazing, if this is anything to go, if we're gonna have more questions

and answers in this part of the segment, because that's a handbrake here. But it's a handbrake turn. It's impressive. Not just a handbrake. It's a skid, but it's got the crowds attention because why isn't there anyone good enough to build a ladder in Amsterdam

or is it the hand-built aspect? Okay, Stari, no, I know. We're not just gonna do the updates of Stari every week. We are for next week. Oh, I'm gonna be late. You already got lazy. Pick a new one. You found Good Talent.

The problem is Jack, you know what he's done. He's found Good Talent in Stary's. He's like, great, I don't have to sort it out another one for next week. Anyway, Cypher, share the wealth. We'll do. Stary, you've had your moment. You're building a ladder. Very sweet, go.

We'll set up a thing on the website that people can just drop a voice memory in of what they're up to today. That would be hard for people to do. No, it's easy. Can we set up like a WhatsApp? You could just send a message to you. Oh yeah, we'll work it out.

Because it already goes as a fan of podcasts when I hear other podcasts go easy, go to the website, something, yeah, Mike, forget about it. Love it. I mean, I'll dedicate. The whole show is done. I know, I know. That's why I want to make it easy for people because. I mean, I'll dedicate. Whole show is done. I know, I know.

That's why I want to make it easy for people because I would have been to dedicate an hour of my life listening to a podcast in the car. And I'd be like, if you want to get involved, simply go to the website all the time for you to get involved. But not to record an audio message. That's the problem with it. That's hard.

Websites are easy, audio messages are hard. First bit of business, track suits. What are we, we're still in the ADF track suits from last year. We're happy with these track suits. One, I think we could change them up. Yeah, if there's, so what, brand, filler? Yep, speeder, slas, gear, anything. We'll take anything.

It's nice to be in the Defence Force ones, but we have run its course, Jacko Tukis. I would say, Jacko Tukis. Jacko Tulkies tracks it home. I've got a Navy one. And went for a job. You took your roller strion Navy tracks it home. Well, we didn't need it. We went for a job.

We went for a job. But Jack, these are the show tracks it's made. Tony Barbers not taking the suit so that he hostels the century. And he probably did. I bet you he did. But you don't see bugs bunny. He leaves his suit. We can do that. You don't see... Bugs Bunny. He leaves you soon.

He's the only thing we can do to this. You don't see the celebs from Celebrity Splash walking around and they're show speedos. They stay in wardrobe. Over there might take them to the beach during summer. I don't think they always do. I don't think they do. Wait, if we replace them, I'm definitely...

I will hope to keep mine. Do we have to give these back? No, no, no. No, no, no. Defends one. This is as I would say this though, this is the closest we've come to a promotional track suit. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no you said we needed to address. And you said, Firstly, can we say thank you to all of the podcastes

across the summer break, who've stayed invested in the show. We know audio messages are hard to do, but emails are easy. So we appreciate the correspondence. We're sifted through it all. And those people that's, you know, they're like not up to date yet on the podcast, whatever.

It doesn't matter. You don't need to be, this doesn't have to be March Eve for you. Yeah. You know, you're staying, whatever you consume it as up to you. But thank you for the emails. As we were going through them, a theme popped up. And it was from the more kind of hard core listeners of the show, people that have been with the various incarnations of this show over the years. A one name, one word kept popping up. I'd say about a dozen times. And it was always cryptically mentioned as if this was a common topic of conversation on the show.

We had people saying, well, I guess the good news about this here is Jonathan Denholm can listen to the show again. Yeah, and when he went home, when he rang me in. The name rang a bell to me, but didn't immediately. And then we remembered. Yeah. If you listen to this show five years ago in 2014, it was a radio show,

Ten Inhood Podcast, it was called The Happy Hour. It was just sort of a stopgap show. I love this show. No, we had a great time, but in fact, there was a long email from someone I received saying it was the preferred format of our show. No, for the radio station. They hated it. They didn't like it.

We were essentially doing a podcast on air and the power's it be despised it. Yeah. They didn't know where to put it. No. Because it wasn't fit for radio, but it was a lot of fun to do as a show. Yeah. One of the great things on the show was if you performed a feat, an incredible feat, I suppose much like the Hamish Anticoin, you could win a gold coloured watch.

Now there was only 50 of these ever minted. Yeah. I had one you had one and a Jack. Did you get one? I got one. Yeah, Jack. I don't still have it, just like, I guess in a move and I just don't have it anymore. Doesn't surprise me in another insulting revelation, Jack.

This guy rings up Jonathan Denham, I said, I'll do anything for a watch. And he said, would you be prepared to take the ultimate wager? Game of Papers is as rock. If you win, you get the gold color watch. Congratulations, but if you lose, you'll band from the show for life.

That's a huge cost to bear. This is what happened in 2014. One, two, three, scissors. Hey, boss. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, man, you band! You band! You said rock, I said rock. You did it, right?

And unfortunately, we are required to hang up when you were mainly any final words Jonathan. Goodbye. He got emotional, didn't it? So then he was out. He was banned. He was banned for life and we blocked his email. He wasn't able to participate in the show.

He couldn't even talk about Hamish and Andy show stories with these friends. Obviously it was a bit of a trust system. We looked into the science of if we could like specifically block the frequency from hitting his suburb, whatever it was with, it was too difficult. So I was like, look you are a band, do the right thing, you're band, you're band forever. Then we find out, Kathleen Jack has been chatting to him. So it was so weird. A format of this show, as people would suggest ideas, we'd have a topic every week and he's

still writing in for topics. No, it's surprising, Jack betrayed us. topic every week and he's still writing in for topics. Not surprisingly, Jack Petratus. And... Oh, it's just being polite. I think I honestly said, hey, thanks for still contacting the show. I'm aware of the ban, so just be careful. You didn't at all.

You didn't, I've gone back and listened to the audience too complicated to play out here, but you said, don't worry, I'll bring these ideas up. I just won't say they came from you. So you're covering for him. Classic double agent move. We find out about this, so we said Jack, call him and do the right thing. Hello.

Good day, John, it's Jack Colin from the Hamish and Andy show. How are you going? Good job. Yeah, good mate. Hey, I'm just giving you a call because I know that we've been emailing back and forth a little bit when we weren't supposed to. Yeah. Yeah, and I don't know if someone's caught wind of it and there's a chat that someone's been talking to you inside the

team and I've just got to stamp it out so this is the last time we'll ever talk to each other. Oh that's a pity. Sorry mate, gotta go. I shouldn't never be talking to you now. I mean it was actually a really nice guy. We felt a bit bad, we commuted it to five years. It was sort of like a parole board review and we went, you know what, you can have five years. Now a lot of people noticed in 2019, that's the five years.

So let's give. The question before us is, do we allow this guy back into the show? Yeah, well let's call him and ask him whether he's been listening. I assume you'd still have his number on speed dial, Jay. Well this is his number from five years ago so who knows if it works. Hey Siri, go to most. He's most texted.

I know what he's been listening to. Oh, without us it would be horrible. Hello John. Johnathan. Hello. It's Hamish and Andy here. I'm just gonna run away in the back of the takeoff. That's okay. Uh, where are we going, Johnathan? Oh, great. Hey, sorry, we shouldn't have wasted time checking where you're going.

We're just calling because it's 2019 now. And the band. The band! The band! For five years ago. It's up. We are reviewing your cakes, but we won't be able to do it. And the band. The band. The band. For five years ago. It's up.

We are reviewing your case, but we wanted to check, have you listened at all? No, completely. What about you? You got to be honest. Well, no, that's not true. Obviously, you thought about us a lot, but you did the right thing. Yeah. You were still, you wanted to listen.

Yeah, but you couldn't listen. Is that what you're trying to say? That's right. Am I not able to listen to Yeah, but you couldn't listen. Is that what you're trying to say? That's right. Am I not a good back and listen to the back catalog now? Is that Oh, we're twisting. Jonathan, if you are granted permission, yes, you are allowed to go back and listen to the back catalog Perfect, and you're promised that you haven't heard Anything we've done Yeah, I believe

But um, but even though we have not went up out of your life anymore, still paradoxically, still a fan? Yeah, absolutely. It's been granted to my DNA. Jonathan, welcome back to the fold. Jonathan, would you like to come back to the show? I would love to. You think you've learnt your lesson? It's been tough one, but yeah, I've learnt it. Jonathan, you're back. Yes. You's been tough one, but yeah, I learned it.

Shall I film? You're back. Yes. You are no longer banned from the show. We're welcoming you back. We're doing a podcast now. You wouldn't know. It's just, it's weekly.

Oh, wow. That's a lot of fun. That's a lot of fun. Good luck with this one. Yeah, good luck finding it. It's still in the same poem, I'm Hamish Nihandi, if you've had a podcast before. You would have all that down.

One of the dust off your podcast app. Your back baby. Thanks, Poverha. Oh, no, welcome back. And we will monitor this week's stats to our... We look forward to seeing it tick up by one. We'll push the edit then. See you later, mate. No, it's that's JD.

All right. All right. Have a good trip. That's JD. All right, bye. Have a good trip. Hi, I'm Tom Fuson, Power Moves. Great to see very sharp on the SFX junk. Come back in. Well rested.

People in Melbourne would know Jack had moon lights on a terrestrial radio show. He's obviously just a little bit more. Yes, but don't do the buttons over there, so. Yeah, it's gonna be your hands arrested. Keeps it for us. I guess. I'm lucky, I only wear the glasses with the technical prowess of Jack.

But everyone knows radio sucks. And podcasting goes that. Podcasting is the future. Hey, power moves, we're looking on this podcast to find the definitive list of power moves, things moves you can use in everyday life. It just that gives you an air of authority. It gives you the edge. It gives you the edge in other people's company. Do you want to kick it off to me too? Because I've got one that I saw an engagement party. Everyone will know this one as soon

as I bring it up, but it certainly hasn't been added to the list. Let's get it happening. it up, but it certainly hasn't been noted to the list. Let's get it happening. Congolines starts. Yep. I think it works best if you are second in the Congolines, because you really leave someone in the lurch, but just break off. I'm a Congolines. Just break off.

The guy that first... Oh, you let go of the first. The guy that's first is having... He was out there having the time of his life being quite arrogant about the guy second. Just let him go. And start a weaving left. That's really good.

That's a whole party stop. And that's when he realized the guy at the front wheel was, I don't have any hands around my waist. He give, I'm dancing by myself. He give the third person in line, though, the dangerous idea that they could do it. Because it's an amazing move. It's a really beautiful move.

Because what the guy on the front does, that first person, no one ever says this out loud, but you'll know that what the first person's thinking, which is, I'm the engine. And these guys are my carriages. But what the second guy tells him is, we're actually all engines. We don't need you to drive us.

I think anyone in the top five can do it in engine. Yeah, as long as your break off groups bigger than the group you're leaving, I think it's a pal. It's a really great one. And look, I've got one that came in again. It's on email a really the other day. I just cannot for the life of you find out who emailed this in. That'll know. But it's stuck with me, maybe Laugh Out Loud, as I was reading it as Eating Breakfast one day, reading, just flicking through some emails. When you're walking down the street,

this is a street-based move. So available to a lot of people, because sometimes we have very specific power moves, like you know, after a meeting, like Smith's Apprentice, and you know, the boss says, hand me the small bellos, whatever, like you know, some, they're fine, but it's nice to have some general ones. Yeah, I agree.

If you're walking down the street and there's a dog poo, normally the normal thing to do is like, well, you know, watch out, mind your step, you point it out for the team. The alternate power move is to point at the dog shit and yell as loud as you can. Don't you dare step in that shit. LAUGHTER MUSIC MUSIC Does give the air when you're sick and tired of the person you're with. Stalking. Indulging in their fetish.

Impostive stepping. That's right. It's a good idea. It's been coming from Joe Bainbridge from England. I assume. When a guest arrives at your house at the door, ask if they'd mind taking their shoes off. Good.

So far, a normal occurrence in the Lee Hathels? That can happen. He has, keep yours on. You see the benefit of making them in short. Yeah, making you look taller. That's a good one. Yeah, that's a good idea. That's a good one. Um, this is from Dan.

I don't know why, but because we get everyone's emails on the camera. I always love it when it's a government email. Yeah. So you say, Dan's in the government and I just like knowing guys like Dan helping run the country. Um, it goes, look pretty simple one. When my wife gets mad at me, sometimes I like to go into the fridge and the cupboards in the pantry and tighten all the bottles and jadalids, except, so soon or later she'll

have to talk to me again. You see the view of the vise or a ridge? Oh, that's a bit... What's an older Paso medium-cellsor on a bit tight, is it? This one here... This one appealed to me, it's from Blake Hall, and... Yep. ...very rare that a student can get the better of a teacher.

Oh yeah. Yep. So, I like this. You said, I set my watch to the exact school time. Okay. I lock into their clocks. He's figured out that it's all like the belt. The belt, yeah.

So he goes, I know that the belt's not ringing exactly on 11 when it should be. It's a little bit out, but he sets his clothes. Or it's off a program or something. Yeah. Because why would you leave it to human error? There'd be's student revolt. So now he can predict the future.

And he's in class, and he waits till about 10 seconds to go and starts packing up his bag. Yeah, great. That's when the teacher tells him to stop, great, because the bell hasn't run. And he looks the teacher and the iron goes, three, two, one. Oh, great. Oh, great.

Oh, great. Really good. three two one oh crap really good I kind of feel this I don't give in the air that he's like in Grahamhall day I know exactly how this day is playing out don't bother me with your little model stuff and this comes in from Jonathan Love international podcast

look because this is a good workplace one. When somebody approaches you and begins to speak, he doesn't say this, but I would say it works well if you're trying to assert dominance over that person to do the wider group. Simply when someone approaches you and begins to speak, let them get a few words in, then interrupt them and say, whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down. It makes it look as if they're frantic

in speaking nervously. You then, and I feel like I have to mention this. Yeah. Signs off his email, saying, keep up the great work, fantastic podcast. PS, congratulations on the superior penis, Hamish. Oh, because we did. Yes.

I mean, that was a competition we had last year. Yes. He's just merely referencing a title I won. Yeah. But it's a nice sign off. Okay. Pretty shabby. Failure move from me.

Hey, something for you forgot to mention is we bit a business. We. I know you said to me over the break I should look into the book. I haven't yeah And that disappoints me because I I fulfilled all my tasks Not wearing a gillie suit for the entire time kept it off Horg's good power the show book publisher is a book for week. I guarantee that we'll have an update from Hawke We'll talk to him about making the coffee table book and power moves. Yes

The fantasy is still the open at one side. It's legend moves the other side. I'll move. Yeah It does look to be almost no five percent asshole moves at the moment. Yeah, although Well, we can aim for a fair mix. Yeah, I agree I'd like to ask folks to like how world how well does that sort of double-cover book go in the market? That's the thing. Yeah. And how big, like, there'd be signs behind

how big your copy table is to move units. Copy table books are some of the biggest you'll ever see. Yes. Like, you know, and no one ever reads them. No. Like, oh, you know, like, this one, faces of warhol.

Yeah. Oh, go ahead, yeah. Great. And basically, I'll give you the hits. Mum's got a malt. This will be French gardens. This will be the most red coffee table walkable. We're going to break them up. Yeah, absolutely. And a good name on my side of the fence fence. Look to it, look to it again. Joe hit the floor, immediately printed it off, sprinted out of my office.

Jumped in one of the golf carts that we have at HNA headquarters, screamed across, cut through the stuff, soccer field, screamed across the compound, raced over to the Eastern complex. It's risky. My car.

Your car is so security-wise, so security too. Yeah. Retina. Your tower is very security one, very security two, right in the scan, fingerprint scan, golden rocket, up to the top of your pen house. Yep. It's kicked in the door. Yep. Didn't see what was going on in the jacuzzi,

didn't want to see it. Grab G, you were tallying off with a mink robe. Yep. And said, have a look at this. And I couldn't believe it. And I was like, despite the damage you've done to my door, I think you're like, do you make good time? I didn't know, just skype here from your office.

Forgot about it immediately, because I was like, yes. Yeah. Someone is in trouble. And it's actually forced us to bring a whole new segment to the podcast in 2019. I do not have a record. I bet radio steals this. Yeah, agreed. We're essentially, if someone's in need, we will help out.

We want to help. Yeah, absolutely. And the sequence called this. The concept that we've personally invented here is if someone's in trouble, we use our influence, connections, and the machine of working at a big corporation to quote unquote, rescue them. And all you've got to do is write in and tell us what you need help with. This one came from Dan. He's a young, he's an international podcaster, so immediately I'll end Tanners up.

We love to look after every one of those that use to listen globally, not just in our home country of Australia. Guys, have an interesting request for you. I purchased flights to Melbourne for the Red Hot Chili Peppers concert. Good job, very soon. Before tickets were on sale,

so he's purchased flights first. And just what you would expect to happen next happened. I missed out on tickets despite waiting as soon as they came up for sale as well as registering for the pre-sale. So everything's worked against Dan here. He's filthy. I'm from Deneid in New Zealand. So these flights, not cheap. These aren't cheap flights. Look, I don't like doing this, but I'm wondering if there's anything you're able to do to help me out here being the genuine legends that you are. And it was that sentence that got me under. Is there anything you're able to do to help me out here being the genuine legends you are? Look back to here, look forward to hearing from you. Back to you. And I thought,

well, look, we're doing these rescues now. How can we help? Yeah. He's got flights. He's obviously spent a lot on the flights, but he's got no tickets. Should we get Dan up? Yeah, let's give him a buzz. BEEP. BEEP.

Love doing this stuff, mate. Quite good. BEEP. How are you? How are you, Dan? Dan. Dan, it's your best friend's Hamish and Andy here from the Hamish and Andy podcast. How are you? I'm very well. Thanks, it's your best friend's Hamish Nandie here from the Hamish Nandie podcast.

How are you? I'm very well. Thanks. How are you guys? Well, I'm really well. And you are the first participant in Hamish Nandie to the rescue and new segment for 2019. Interesting. Interesting.

Very interesting. We got your email. We had been tossing around doing this for a little while, doing, you know, seeing if we could help use our powers for good, help one person per week, got your email, you just a recap, see if we've got the faxia correct, you bought flights to Melbourne from Dunedin before, I mean just assuming you were going to get chili peppers tickets. Yeah.

Yeah, very, a very risky assumption. Yeah. Well, you would have thought you were you registered with the presale, you did everything you were meant to do and you missed out. So now you have got flights but you are ticketless and that is not a good situation to be in. Do you mind if we ask how much you just spent on the flights? Two flights, I think 299 to each flight. I only bought tickets over there which was safe. I got caught by consumer Fumerism and in New

Zealand gas me a wee notification saying they had to sell outside up and put. Yeah right. So you do what two tickets? Is that two one way tickets? Yeah. Right. So that's okay. So obviously, you know, that's almost 600 bucks. Yeah. You know, that if you don't get chili peppers tickets, that's just going to go to waste that money.

You're 600 bucks down. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Dan, a lot of people would send an email like you sent thinking there's no hope here. The timing, your timing is spectacular. Yeah. Since we're now going to start rescuing people, we had a word with the people here. Obviously, we're podcast one now, but podcast one is still part of a radio network.

Yeah. Our old boss, Grumpy Dave, he is the head of two networks, right? So he's across a lot of stuff that's happening at the station. We told him about your dilemma. And he said he could help you out, bud. Dan, we said to Dave, is there anything that you can do to help this young man out? Are you sitting down, Dan?

I'm sitting down, yeah. Because Grumpy Dave has agreed to purchase your flights off you at 90% of what you pay. You're only going to be 10% you've hardly lost any money. He's got family in Dan Eden, he's got cousins. And he'll bring him across. And we had to fly them across using your airfare. You could be in much worse situations. Yes, so he's come we've come to the rescue I think we've got Dave on the lock. Happy Dave's there Dave. Thank you very much. Hello, boys. Hello, Dan. I've always wanted to go to No, you're flying people. You're flying your family from Danny and to Melbourne. Oh, I wasn't going the other way We from Danny and Demelvin. Oh, I'm going the other way. Yeah, it's just one waiting. Even better. There's only two one way to know. And so it's only it's a

540 bucks, which is good. Because yeah, Dan's pay nearly six. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Please just clarify. I don't want to have to pay the name change fleet. But that's it. Dan. Oh, now you're getting difficult. There's still a good offer. Dan, now you're getting difficult there, that's completely good. Oh, I still look good off of it with a little bit of speed.

Dan, you'd have to pay the name change fee. Dan. Oh, but. Do you accept the change the name change fee charge? Oh, pay 90 to think of the name change fee. Yeah. That's a pretty good job. It's got it back with the 90, 90 bills.

That's it. I'm gonna keep going. There you go, Dan. And just when you think nothing good happens in this world There you go dream come true. Yes, that's I'm so You go leave you guys on the line to not out the details exchange basketball numbers or log in or I

Dan you bring up you need a reservation number you need to switch the day leave you guys to, Dan, you bring up, you need a reservation number, you need to switch the day. Believe you guys are not out there details. Feels good. Hi, Dan. I think to the rescue Feels good. Hey Dan. This is the part where you know we come back out as joking we couldn't actually get me to actually cock it. That's hilarious. That's hilarious. I'm glad I don't go out to out to any people. Couldn't even find them. Sorry about that.

Again, they're real rescue stands. Yeah. Yep. Apparently one of their concerts on YouTube. This is not to the rescue anymore. This is just as you get in the doors of the Westpac Rescue Chamber. You push you out again.

I'm just back around with you, mate, you still attached to the rope. Oh, see. Okay, full CD, like yeah. Andy's gonna do that. What's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, what's up, a bit later than I said I was going to, to Beck. And she'd been waiting. And, I know. Candle, melons, cold chicken dinner. Yeah. Now it wasn't so much to see that out of a movie.

It was more like, she'd... Hiding in the bushes. She just said, she just said, what time you home? I said about nine. And I got home around about 12.30 having had a few too many beers. Do what you want.

And Beck said, you know, you're gonna sleep in the spare room. And I went, Well, it's her house. I was, well actually, I went, like pretending that it was a punishment. It's the best thing ever, the spare room. Like, I think sleep a part of the time. Yeah, it's like,

I'm gonna get up in the morning. I mean, so is rap, don't rap, sleep all night, do whatever you want. So I couldn't believe that I was getting, you know, a whole bed to myself. You're going to Vegas to think about it. Very noisy, and there's a lot of bright lights and you'll hate it. So I was like, oh, but I took that on the chin and set it up to the other bedroom I went.

In the morning, after nine hours of sleep, I went, I better go check on back, went across, and she's not in our bedroom. I was like, oh, maybe she's gone out, Pilates, work, whatever. I was like, oh, I better go check on Beck, went across and she's not in our bedroom. I was like, oh, maybe she's gone out, Pilates, work, whatever. And not a hearth from the bathroom, out a little on-sweet. Sweetie. And I was like, oh, I opened the door and Beck's there. She just burst into tears. And I was like, oh, is everything all right? And she's like,

yeah, she's trying to gather with what she's exhausted. And that's when I remember, for the last four months, Beck has been asking me to fix the internal bathroom door. At two o'clock, she went for a wee. And on the way, stuck in that old toilet. At two o'clock, two o'clock in the morning, she went for a wee. Went to the back of the bed.

You got your wish. The door nods, broke off. Here are the kickers. The light and the fan are both on the outside of the room. So she's in the sun. No, so she put the light on. I see turned them on. So turn it on.

So all night long, like fan noise, light. Yeah, exactly. Like one ton of my bait. Yeah, I said, I looked down on the ground and there was two towels and a robe as a pillow. So you tried to make a nest. You tried to. Often in captivity,

Becks will make a nest. Yes. So she tried to have a sleep, didn't get anywhere with that. I said, well, you don't, she was, I was yelling out to you, but I'm on the other side of the house. And you're in detention.

Having a heavy asleep, the normal. You've got headphones on and a dancing around the room playing a guitar. Having a great time. And then she's like, well people around us know that we live here, me yelling at Andy and he hysterically is probably... She's yelling it nicely. Well, like it's tough at that point, which is a bit worried. Don't tell me

you went to the flyer drop to neighbours. Guys, just clearing a few things up there. You might have heard my girlfriend screaming, Andy, Andy, I can totally understand why it would sound like we're having a fight, but I'm giving you this very elaborate, seemingly made up story about a door handle that fell off the dancers. Oh, your questions. And I'm totally in the clear. So I said to her, well, what we, what we're going to do is because I had no idea what time it was. I must have got some sort of, it's been a daylight.

It's completely daylight now. The sun had come up three hours before and, so I said, what are you going to do? I said, I was, there's a small window, which I was good, I saw builders going and coming across the way, and I was going to yell out to the builders, and we've got a code for was going to yell out to the builders and we've got a code for the house that gives them the code and come and rescue me.

So I was just kind of buying, biting time to see if you'd come in but if it was got to worse by say midday, she felt like the day had really got away from her. She was going to start yelling at builders. I went, right, what, I mean how else did you spend the other three hours waiting? I said, I did three face masks and had a five-spot. And it's sort of like that jail you hear about in Colombia. You're in jail, but you can, you know, it's a nice jail if you've got the money. You can kind of have a fancy time.

Let me ask you this quickly. When you woke up in that morning, did you go straight into your bedroom to check on Beck? Or did you sit in bed and play iPhone games? Or do you live in that? So was your mind going back while she's dying with hunger in the bathroom? Yep.

I played school maps. You were playing soccer match, yes, that we played a lot. I'm gonna ask you a question. You told me about that game, and you're like, I'm addicted to this soccer game. And I started playing it, but I think I'm playing the wrong game. Really? I'm playing a school hero. No, I'm not to this soccer game and I started playing it but I think I'm playing the wrong game. Really? I'm playing a score hero

No, I'm not as addictive. I've been playing it for weeks trying to get into it He's going, he's anti-carrying on about this game like he's acting like it's the greatest game full-time Yeah, what's different about score match? I've played school hero. I don't know but it's I mean I hear you and Ryan talking about it I'm thinking myself That's not the conversation I would have based on the game on play. Yeah, don't snilly lost, he's, give her a no for it,

because the problem with score match is you're playing silver. Oh my god, I got back some in bathroom, yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ando, we caught up many, many times over summer, had a lot of fun. There was one burning question I wanted to ask you every time we caught up and I restrained myself because I thought self-issue of me to ask this off air as a lot of, most of our catch ups are. When really, I think the people of the people people podcast would want to know the answer as well because it was it was to do something that's been

was raised I think two years ago Jack maybe a year maybe when we're back still on radio. Yeah, probably I Don't know the answer this question. It's a genuine 5050 for me. Yeah, but depending on yes, no question It's a yes, no question depending on your answer. I have prepared a song that could go either way. Okay, great. A song for yes and a song for no. Because as you hear in a second, the question has been slightly to do with the song-based world. All right.

So have you recorded the question as a song as well? No, I've recorded the flow on the celebration or the head scratcher. Depending on the yes or the note. The question I will perform live to you in moments from now, just using my voice. Yeah, great. And I'll do it in English. I'll be like any other upwards inflection at the end. You'll recognize it instantly.

Here's a question. Okay, good. The question is, here it's coming. Here it's coming, here it's coming. I did promise. Moments from now. Slight preamble before the question. Okay.

It's well known to long-term listeners of both the Radish and the podcast that you have a special place in your heart for the hit nonsense film, Mary Poppins from the 70s or 60s or whenever it came. 50s. Not just film, it was a bit silly. From the 60s or 20s, I don't know,

when it came out, it was met with great glee from you a couple years ago, and was announced they're doing a remake. It came out over time, I saw it on buses, posters everywhere, bus stops. Here's the question. Did you see Merry Poppins at the movies. I did not.

That surprises me. You can pop and steal it's playing in sub-sidermers pop and see you till Hello mr. Any know pop and what's that about? That's cackling jack and he wants to know what's with your pop and strut so grab a tiny blue bird in a rainbow What you and pop and yourself silly yes? You Puppens we did it in the store of pop and sorry. You love Mary pop and What's the deal? Two bizz? Too busy?

No. As it turned out, it wasn't a remake. It was a new one. It was a sequel. Yeah, but still in the world you love. Yeah. I was kind of excited about seeing the same film. Oh, you're worried it would have been so...

Same in my blunt seeing you say, yeah, you know, but it turns out I don't think. Not on your radar. No, what about the opportunity to sing along in the same... That's what was popping your poppins. That's what you would have gotten your poppins in. Oh yeah. Do you want to hear this song if you did say it?

Yeah, sure. Poppins, poppins, poppins, come on back we're gonna see Mary Poppins at the Flix. Grab this umbrella, I'll be that homeless fellow, don't worry I bought all the gold clastics Oh second night of poppins We're going again What do you mean you've got some better home I told the boys I'm off at gold put secretly I'm up and zing with you all night long Poppins, poppins, poppins

I've seen a 50 times or more Read the sign on my door Gone poppins zing Poppins, poppins, poppins Nonstop, poppins, poppins, I've seen a 50 times or more. Read the sign on my door. Gone, poppins, sing. Poppins, poppins, poppins. Non-stop, poppins. And that's how I spent my summer. I'm Andy.

That one was from your perspective in the style of Poppins. Or I imagined you saw it more than once. Yeah, I see it. I've heard that, I think. OK. Yeah Jack if you got to look a celebration effect over there Yeah, don't hear yeah

Celebration and the radiation the radio They don't use you for buttons that you already I show that you do Amazing Ladies and gentlemen, yeah, cackling jack after years and years of huge promises and big talk Yeah, and a lot of YouTube tutorials and then let's face it hiring professionals and Starting getting a bit of sweet breakfast radio money comforting his wife. Yeah, well I lived with so many parents promises. Big claims, soon honey. Oh, I'm just waiting on a bit of merbou. Yeah, exactly.

Has finally, when I say built, I'm going to put that in quotation marks. I've seen the construction. I've seen the construction. Started to build then oversaw the construction. Professional construction of his house and he has moved in. Thank you. You're in. Thank you.

It's just big. Now, from the bold claims at the beginning of, guess what, guys? I'm going to build a house with my two hands, kind of an Abraham Lincoln feel. I'm going to mill the wood myself. I'm going to foward from the sand. No one knelt it down into glass. No, from the notebook.

That's exactly who Jack 40 was going to build. Had high hopes. And then we were asking stuff about, like, what's the laws laws like doesn't have to Pass code all I cared about was that thought of grandkids one day telling people in their family our granddad built this house And that before the roof fell in on him and he was inspired by one of the struts Because he thought you could just use tent poles for time Yeah, hopefully they're not saying granddad build this house followed by hysterical laughter Yeah, hopefully they're not saying Grandad build this house followed by hysterical laughter

So Jacko how what what percentage of the house did you do? Your big claim was Christmas day you promised your wife. Yes, and we were in Christmas Christmas Eve We dragged the bed into the bedroom. So it's still not not finished, but of Well, sorry room. So it's still not not finished but I'm sorry. What's the opposite of a pause? Can we live in the air? We live in the house. House has. We got a little bit of landscaping to do. There's still a bin sitting at the front and a few things around the house that like there's no fireplace in the fireplace. This is a big empty hole at the moment. You're entertaining people there. Like, yes, you use it as a,

and I love how have you guys around soon? When it's finished. Well, it's interesting you say that because it's like, it's obviously begun to function as your house. Yes, so we've really stopped putting work in because now we can just use it as a house. It's got a bathroom, it's got a kitchen. Well, here's the thing, Jack.

I feel like the listeners of our guests are in so invested in this journey. Have you, and in I personally have been, always wondering when's it gonna finish that house? Yep. And it feels like a very joyous occasion that the house has constructed, which is why we wanted to throw you

a surprise housewarming. Right, at my house. Yeah, of course, that's the house. The first ever surprise housewarming. Right, at my house. Yeah, of course, the first house, the first ever surprise housewarming. We're gonna organize it for you. We're gonna get people, here's at hamishanings.com and register. It's in Melbourne.

If you would like, you'll never know when it's happening. And you'll get home one day and we'll be now. Oh, it's like surprise birthday. Imagine how annoying that would be if you needed a surprise birthday. We're gonna get a mini bus, and we'll blindfold everyone for security reasons, although I don't really care.

Yeah, I was gonna say, that's, I'm glad you chopped that because someone I wouldn't worry too much. Someone stole on the fireplace. Oh no, we just never put it in. How do you steal a hole? We're gonna, mini bus, let's say a dozen people over yours, everyone can bring a plate. So this will work best for Melbourne listeners, but if you can get yourself to Melbourne.

What, how many people would be good at the desert? I think it does, it's not a very big house. No, it's not huge, but I mean, if you wait till the entertaining area out of the back is done, but that might be... We're ready to warm up. So if you're going dining room, maybe 12 to 24. Great. I think we can, Andy's got his bus license.

We'll see what the biggest bus we can get in. But we'll get people on a mini bus. We'll sort of meet somewhere central. Yes. Drive out. So Bianca, at least know my wife, who also has a surprise in bed. It'll be nice surprise, you both.

We'll probably hire a private detective to let us know if you can get out there. I'll just tell you. This might be a surprise. I actually like the idea, but this part will be the surprise and then we just agree on a date and we go there. We like the idea of just barging in. The surprise is the exciting part.

That's the real gift. That's the gift to us and you. Everyone gets so excited for surprise birthday parties. They feel like, oh, what's going to happen? Those kind of things. It's the end of the... The end of the... The end of the party is really the most exciting part.

If we tell you, we steal that from you. Oh, it's a party. It's a housewarming that Jackson organized. All right, so is it daytime? Because usually I get... I don't know. Whips the seal. And what do I have to do?

Do I have to... Do I have to... I mean, you'll have to... Well, I'm worried now I have to keep the house clean at all times in cases. That wouldn't, that wouldn't, I mean, it's, it's how much you want to show off your house. But I haven't thought this round a bit. It's not a bad point. Would it be worth Jack having on hand, you know, a dozen bags of chips and...

No, no, you can cater. No, we can bring that. No, but he should have a bit of stuff on hand at all times. And I, I mean, he's hosting a party. Yeah. Well, I think it was... She's a bit... He's not going over there for nothing.

He's a regular surprise birthday party rule. Should... So you don't have to do anything? He shouldn't have to do anything. Right. If mission chips and beer company want to send me a whole lot of stuff to have... No, I just don't want to name the mission chips. And what a...

I mean, just to prove that it's not sponsored. What a poor choice. Yeah. Because they're just corn chips. Why wouldn't you go one of the big hitters like Smith's or Kettle? Yeah. Oh, I really love those mission chips. Oh, I'm gonna get out of here.

Now, he's got this again. Hey, before we go, I want to thank all our listeners, particularly the ones that go and fill out the form, the more involved. Valued and important pockets. That's what we've got all about, what it was actually called. Well, it's because when you do the reading, we don't do the filling out. We're certainly very grateful of the man there, and I've just had a chat to web gays and jazze. It's going to be a new form for Jack's surprise housewarming.

Great, new form for that. I think we could have a couple more questions on the... Yeah, we've had a couple of other things. It's very easy to do though, but it's so much easier than attaching a sound file. You won't have to do that. I was having a read through my side, 50, 50, they get split, yeah. And I felt like, Lord, Kane. Oh, Lord?

I don't think so. But, he said, special skills, I've evained in my face that I can move without touching it. I'm not bad. Probably not bad for radio, audio. So, I mean, because really, I just know it on the special skills. What really excites us is like,

well, is this going to be exciting to watch someone attempt this? Yeah. And if it's just my elbows are double-jointed, yeah, that is great. But it's not as exciting to what you attempt it as it is to watch someone guess someone's suicide just by visual inspection.

So then I wanted down to, I would say a lesser or a less thoroughly looked at area on the skills form or the VIP form, unique and interesting facts about myself. Yeah, right. Yeah, actually people usually shoot their wide and special skills. A lot of people just go, a lot of people just go, oh, I already did it.

I had to touch you at my elbows. Exactly. Said I've released an album online, made up purely of my farts. Jeez. And I went, oh, have you really released it? You know, like, have you just put one up there and one farts? One farts of your release? 56 tracks.

Seven, seven minutes and 56 seconds of audio. Seven minute album. It's an eight minute album. Hang on, are these keys real farts? That's why it's so, and there's tracks like Breath of Fresh Air. Oh. No, that's not a Breath of Fresh Air.

That's what it is. I mean, that's someone forcing it through sweaty cheeks. All I'm saying to you, Ham, is, I know this is not a savory area, but the amount of time and effort this guy has put into this, I think it's fascinating. And I thought, one of the things I'm interested to hear

where we're going with this and I think we should get Lord Kane on if that's what you're about to say. One of the things I think would shock time travelers from the 80s or 70s, ten hour days, would be how lax we are with the ten album. Because back in the 70s, an album meant a deal, it meant a promo to her, you're on a bus, you're doing a renaissance to support it.

It didn't mean 756 or far, but now you can just put an album out, you can put anything at Goon at album. So if you guys were interested, yeah. I know that we've got a level of on this podcast, that we don't want to dip below as far as, you know, low-brow humor. But if we approached it as we're getting a young artist on, to actually learn about the album, you're right. And take it quite seriously. We have musical guests from time to time. Yes, certainly. We had them in our careers. Amy Shark came on, she sung.

We made us win like a shark. You superimposed some stuff. Exactly. I was wondering, do we get Lord Kane on to talk seriously about the album? Easy willing to discuss it seriously. Yes. Have you reached out to him?

Hmm. Right. Um, more I vote, yes. Jack. Andy, your vote. Mine's yes, Jack doesn't need. Well, sometimes we get people to perform live would we get him in the music studio? I'm acoustical.

I'm acoustical, I should have. Well, unless, well, let's fold back on his parts then normal. Let's take a one step at the time, right? Huge forward days to next week. We're gonna have Lord Kaiman.