Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2019 Ep 42

Episode Date: March 6, 2019

1. Horgs – Power Moves book2. Behind the Music with Lord Kane3. Jack’s housewarming invites4. Slapping Skill5. Hamish the Medium

A List Snap Production Activate your internet Because the Hamish and the Podcast starts in 3, 2, sorry, still buffering. 1 Good Podcast to you, Hamish. Good podcast to you, Jack. And to everyone listening. Continue the theme from last week. I'm interested to see who we've got.

I reached out to Chris in the United States of America. What's he going to be up to today? He gave me back this voice memo. Hey, this is Chris from Vermont in the United States. Today I'm watering plants and playing a little bit of guitar. Cheers. It's like a ginger. It's just me and Santa like Jack.

That's Jack most days. Well, though, watering plants. Yeah. Well, Jack, there's not many plants yet. Big guitars come and jack. That landscaping is going to come in soon and we know he'll be out there. I mean, I believe that that is a real person,

but it sounded like a fake person. There's something about the way you said like, this is Chris and I am for months. Sorry. I just think of the email I want to get. I want to earn my $20. Yes, of course I am from Vermont. Yum, yum, do try a classic Vermont pie if you're in town. Chris, I thought it was perfect.

Just for a second, I thought you got our friend, Chris, who lives in America, that we're all buddies, we either went, oh, I'll week two. And he's just panicked and called in an international favor. No, no, that was great. Great little insight into the real life of Chris. A life of a podcaster. Hey, let's get down to brass tax straight off the head here.

Yep. We made a promise last year. We've delayed giving that promise out. No, but it's increasing. The promise is slowly gaining value and cheese, but I'm going to live on the promise. It'll be a white hot promise. Everyone knows that the coffee table book market

is a hot one and it's only ever growing, I've heard that there's no slowing down and building coffee tables. Who's ever, you're gonna need books for that? Who's ever heard of buying a coffee table? May I have? Who's ever heard of throwing one out? No. No?

Not aware of it. So the critical mass of coffee tables is only increasing. As Andy said, therefore, the market for coffee table books is booming. We have been, you know, going through and riding up a list of power moves throughout, through everyone's help, of course, and the idea is to put it into one book that covers on both sides, which sounds normal,

but it means that you can read it. Very book like, you can read it from both directions. The trick is both covers Other front cover. Yes depending on if you want to read about legendary power moves or our soul power moves Yep, um have for people who are new to the podcast. We recommend going back Yeah, and what would we just is it because it's a hammy channey book do you just have my face on legends and I'm just you know, no, we'll work on the design We'll check it around later. I'm just spitball. Do we need on the design. Will work on the design. We'll chuck it around later.

Just spitball. Do we need to give you an example of a power move? Well, I was gonna ask you a question, actually. A couple of power moves come up where I'm like, well, I'm not. I want people to understand that not every single power move gets in. Can I read you one that came in and look,

I don't want this to dissuade anyone from submitting power moves. Gerard, lovely guy and he writes well, but I don't know if this is a power move. Like, I want people to understand that we're putting the cream of the crop in. You know, I want to just reading out every single email we get,

because power move, when you're visiting an office, we have some sort of meeting happening. So that's a common scenario. When they offer a glass of water, you accept it, and he's written minor power move number one. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, glass over. So I'm like, okay, an accidental knock. The effect, everyone in the room, no matter how high their position will jump up and rush around for you to find some paper towel or even offer you their jacket, to quickly clean up the spillage all the while you remain seated. Yeah.

And all you have to do, sorry of a few stories of the trouble. Everyone since Dan Puffton flustered and you're sitting a little higher in the chair because it looks like they serve you. No, if we were bringing out a book called Clumsy Smug People, that would by be in there. Just going into an office and spilling the water. No. A good example. No one's going out going, wow, what do you mean we just sell that diamond mine for a dollar? Well, he got me with them. He's a bill. I thought he was the king of the world. That's a good idea of not one. One of my favorites in the past is telling the driver in the car

that the child locks on if you're in the back seat. And it means they get out. That's good. And they have to over the door for you like a chauffeur. That's the one was getting out and leaving the back door open. Yeah, that's also a good one. Ripper. Hey, we know a guy in book publishing.

His name's Hawks. He's done inventions on this show before. And told us a lot of great stories. Let's give him a buzz now and just see what kind of turn around time is required. The first coffee table book we've ever done. Yep. What if he's done one?

I think he did hang a Mandela one. I think he's one of these second. Coffee to a bit insulting. Hello. Hogi. Hello. Hogi. Hello, I am. Yeah, how you doing? How are you, Hogs?

Gentlemen. How are you? Hogs. Any was just saying as the phone was ringing that you made a coffee table book about Nelson Mandela? Yeah. Did you run? Whole life not interesting enough for you.

Just give us the abridged bits for the coffee table. Just give us your highlights Nelson. I don't have time to get all story. Well, I was at a coffee table for you. Yeah, I mean it went gangbusters, but he was still alive at the time, but we kind of did it thinking that maybe you might know. No, it was Nelson Mandela in Memoriam the coffee table book But we printed twenty thousand term any yeah, and we thought we'll just keep it here and And wipe it and these these leaves like ten more years and

Hang on, you've got a history of this. This is exactly what you and Andy didn't ask for the Marmot Ali Now sadly both of those heroes did in fact eventually pass away. But I'm almost glad it wasn't at the time that was financially suitable for you to teach your lesson. Hawks, the show here's got a proposition for you. We need some key questions answered. First of all, so it sounds like after the Mandela days, did you stay in the coffee table book

game, are you still producing them? No, we tried to release the 2020,000 and no one bought them. So that was the only time you dipped a toe in the coffee table market. So we've come to the right guy here. So you'd be hungry to make another one to try out the market again. Yeah, Hawkes. We want to make a coffee table book for the show. Yep.

How quickly can you turn a coffee table book around? How many pages are we talking? 100? Yep. I mean, we could do it pretty quick. I mean, I mean, if you've got the pictures, that's the. We don't have any pictures. We're not.

Well, what do you do? We're bringing you the concept in the words. We're going to do the pictures as well, do we? Well, who's going to do the pictures for us then? We'll work that out. But Hawkes, what we need to know is logistically from your end, if we were to supply you with so we give you the PDF and we're like, it's done. It's done.

Pictures and words. And words. And words, and then we'll make it look pretty. Yep. Well, I hope so. Yep. You're the book publisher. Yeah. Are you pointing a more, 100 pages pretty thin for a coffee table for it.

Okay, how many pages was Mandela? Oh Mandela was a good 400 I think. Oh I see. But now it's like 250's fine. Well, we'll get, well, I don't know if we've got the any power moves. Well, so Hawks, on the podcast we've been making a list of power moves, right? Yeah. And we think it's the perfect subject to have a coffee tail book.

And so we're just going to gather them all together. Quick question, Hawks, just for sales. I feel like people buy a lot of those little books at the counter, the impulse books. Could you ever make a coffee tail book that can sit at the can or at a bookstore? I mean, we just have to not call it a coffee table book. I mean, it's just a coffee book I suppose. Yeah, right. A book you can have coffee with. I think we want it hardcover here. Yeah, right. We want hardcover. How much per unit or COVTW is more than $20 or $95? That's much more of you. That's interesting. That would be

incredible. If you're looking, if you're thinking of an anti-war hole that's like sometimes they're like 90 bucks and we think ours would be more 180 to 200. Jack, don't roll your eyes at 90 bucks mate, you'd be lucky to get a war hole for under 90. I was thought something in the 40s to pay for the hardness of the cover. Yes. If I can get the sales, I reckon we just go out at 30 bucks. So you're going to big W and no, they'll fill it for 20. Thanks for coming.

Ah! So with a losing $10 book. Back in my watch from 4 My Boys. That is the rule in the book industry. Okay, so let's get back to how long it would take. If we provided you the pictures and the moves and the words, how long? A week.

I'd turn that around in. Were you painting it? Australia or, I have a saying. No, I'm just saying to get ready to go to print. That's not a turnaround. That's, you haven't done anything. You just tucking your napkin in. You haven't eaten any food. You haven't done anything. You just tucking your napkin in. You haven't eaten any food.

Pretty for print. We thought we'd be doing it. We're getting ready for print. What are you doing? Double check again. Okay. We print in China. It's going to take six weeks plus a week to get it ready.

That's seven. And then it's going to take three weeks to get it here. So we're talking ten weeks. Time to quick turn around. Okay, good. And then distribution out to the different stores. Another week. Another week. Yep. That's 11. Thank you. And apart from book week, what's another big book week of the year? Yeah, we probably found out this guy. Get it in stills for Father's Day. Actually did that when I launched Annie by Handish,

the smart casual fragrance for men. Or work well for us. Yeah, if Australia's fastest selling fragrance of all time, is it win? And it is. Okay. Well, it was finally the day September, so I think it's the August. Four fathers that I do. uh... okay that's what was part of the time by certain store all that's all father's six months away and we we could really

you can get it could be three months away so we get three months no i think we need the three months we need three more months of collecting more power move this because we put the car now to go if you've got any moves you know this is the time to get him in your make it into the book also this is the bit we say if you're very submit a one, you're letting us put in the book and that's all totally cool legally. So why don't we say, hey, speak now for it, call now?

No, it's a call. Call now if you've got a problem. Yeah. No one's called. All right, great. Everyone's cool with the fact that we can buy the end of April. So in five, six more, seven more weeks from now, we're cutting it off. Yep. That's a submission date. Yeah, you have it with that hogs then we'll give you what do you want to do?

And PDF word doc. What do you prefer? I just can't read PDFs on. Thank you, orgs and Obviously this show will have to do some kind of contract with you, but we'll get that happening down track. Right. Well, we used to that. Yep, good luck. We used to contract because we're a business. Borg, thanks very much buddy. Bye-bye.

Love you, Horg. Thanks mate. Hey, last week in the show opener. At the end of the day, we stumbled across an amazingly talent of listener, came through my side of the emails on the Valley of an important podcast to form, said you released an album made up purely of his own farts. No one's gonna care about this, but it was the show closer. But I'm just, just kick on.

I mean, that's not, I'm just saying. I think you said show opener. All right. No, I just do it because it could be a few people back to back in the episodes. Yes. I thought you meant openers in like the first show of the whole year. That's what I mean. I thought you meant the first thing we talked about. So the year later. Yeah. Anyway, we've been, it's a handbrake. We're saying handbrake. We're being handbrake. But I know people care about this stuff.

Yeah, the closer of the opening show, except it. Look, we don't want to, I know by my parents, particularly, this is a podcast, Mum does not like toilet talk, but I thought if we attack this seriously, season open up. It's a, what's the show? It's season open up.

It was the season open up. The closing segment of the season opening show. Yes. Anyway. Your mum's right. She doesn't love this kind of stuff. Doesn't love the kind of stuff. But I thought if we attacked it professionally,

and maturely, and we get an artist on to talk about what he's done, it's a 56 track album. She's a man, right. Seven minutes and 56 seconds worth of music. Yep. And if we take it with an mature approach, perhaps it was a learn. It was a learn.

It was a learn a little bit about this artist. Yeah. In the music landscape today, it's hard to be original. So many songs, derivative. So many albums remind you of something that's come before. That's why this artist is special. Lord Kane has put together an album like no other. And he's today's guest on Heemish and Andys behind the music.

Lord Kane, thanks very much for joining us. Oh yeah, Mish and Andy. Lord Kane, it's a huge honor. Firstly, congrats on the album. We've had a listen, covered a cover, and got through our 56 tracks. Lord Kane, I suppose my first question to you is, as someone that's professionally recording these parts as album tracks, how do you know if a fart is just a fart or if it's album worthy? Well, each fart for me has a character of its own, takes on a kind of personality, but not just about taking the one fight and thinking, well, that's a fight, put it on.

It has to have that, that effector. And I personally think that I have 56 of those. Oh, wow. Okay. It seems like we're taking a long time to make this album from what we've heard. It seems like you're out and about when inspiration hits. You record it. You didn't go into a studio. It was special. Are we right in saying it is mostly recorded live in venues? Yeah, it's off the top of the cup. Here comes record inspiration hits yeah, you just got to be ready for it. Yeah, yeah How long did it take you to make this album then? It's actually a two-year making. Whoa That's right. So how many thoughts hit the cutting room for?

There was there was one that didn't make the film and it titled a disappointing finish was one that didn't make the film and titled a disappointing finish. What's going to be the last one? And what was it about that far that just didn't cut muster? Like what was it about the farther? Didn't make it track album worthy? To be honest, it was the smell. Oh, okay. Something a listener would never know, yeah.

But it's that extra layer. Right, okay, okay. Until a quick question on the track, quiet in the cinema. What movie were you watching? A pan. Oh, let's have a quick listen to the track. Oh, you're lucky.

Oh, you're lucky. You're lucky. Oh, you're lucky. No. No. No. Hey, if you're own work, You don't want to. And if you're own work, you've got to be your number one fan to make it in this industry. I can. You do have to like what you're putting out.

Lord Kane, during a dual tone, what are my favourite tracks on the album? There's a child in the background. Let's have a term quick listen to that one These childs that That'll be my child. Yep, that will present for a lot of the work And is it great getting to have the family around as you're recording the album? Um actually they came up with a lot of the titles with me. The kids sitting around listening. What about your partner, your wife?

Is she a proof of the album? I got the standard role of the I.O.P. approach. Right. Art is not for everyone. That's what makes it art. Opening Windows is another track I enjoyed. Let's have a quick listen. Now you're collabing there with a pretty big sound effect. A very well-known sound effect. What was it like working with the Windows noise? It was a bit daunting, a bit company, but they were OK. They were very warming. Well, one thing I wanted to ask you is there's five tones,

ding, ding, ding, ding. And then the last one is the longest. Now, other artists might put their thought before the fifth tone. So they might go, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. You bring your thought in earlier, why? It's unexpected. Yeah, because as soon as I start listening to the track, I thought to myself, I know where the farts can go.

And you surprised us. That's what I like about the album itself. Do you want to have another listen? Yeah. I mean if you didn't pick it up. Brilliantly done. Lord Kane on the track revving the engine again was a tougher one. If we have a listen to that. Geez. Were you driving or someone else driving?

No, I was someone else driving. Yeah, that makes more sense. That was the power park. So you would have had to go to the driver and say, this is what I want to achieve out of this track. Can you rev it that that that's certain time? Yeah, it was very hard to line the two up, but we got it first take. May the point. Unbelievable. I know you're busy. You got a lot of other people to talk to on your press to really appreciate the time. Yes.

Last question. We had was what is next? What's your dream track like a sound to work with? Yep. I guess where would you love to fart the most? I don't like to fart the most, though, the Olympics. LAUGHTER Like Omega's Paris MPAP.

Absolutely. If you did the... I'm lighting the torch. The torch with a litre fart would be... Is there a greater one? Have you got have you got have your plans ahead to Japan 2020? No plans of yet. I think it's a bit higher, I'd say.

Imagine your marks sit. That would be yes stunning. Well, we really do wish you the best. All the best Lord Kane, thanks very much for your time. Good. Cheers Lord. Cheers. Keep working. thank you, mate. BELL RINGS Hey, fantastic idea last week to celebrate the fact that Jack

has finally moved into the house that he promised to build his wife, having not lifted too many tools in the end, just contracted a fair bit of stuff in, being tied from doing breakfast radio. He got a U, though. Got a U. Got a work, but it's got a lot of dust on you. And I believe got the sign off.

Do you get you've passed your final building inspection? We do not pass. Yes, sorry. I believe wrong. Are you living there illegally? I guess technically, I don't know. Maybe I don't want to say too much in case I wouldn't I would never remember on podcasts

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember I told you about the latest we still have to put the lightest up in there Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no it's easy, but we technically I guess shouldn't be living there Definitely not hosting parties there That's good to know that we should we we're gonna hold a surprise housewarming party a lot of people do surprise birthdays Yeah, this is a prize housewarming thing Jack ever done The encasement no one's ever done a surprise housewarming before you must be stochak It happened any moment. Yes. It was a vibe like now at the house because we could have done it Why didn't think you would come straight away? Yeah, so I did I have my garbage right down this week

Week one week it will increase week by you. Yeah, right. Weak one week, it will increase. Weak by you, yeah, we could hit this. We could hit you in the middle. But we might hit you next year. So we might let you guard increase to fever pitch and then just when you fall in a heap and go, it's never going to happen. Maybe that's when we strike. Or the middle of winter with muddy shoes.

Oh, yes. Yeah. He'll hate that the most. Now we're looking forward to doing a really nice thing. But the response has been huge, and we put it out in the podcast last week. A lot of people, we're going to get to a few people that we'll invite in a moment. Jack, first question, a lot of housewarming, there is a gift. Obviously you bring housewarming gifts.

Oh yeah. And the question is for home. Are we going to ask our guests to bring individual gifts I mean, Jack, you know what people are tanning out with like a great blender or new cutlery or cool things Do you know I mean honestly we're trying to be more minimalist? Okay, I think it would be nice I've asked you can't your full fix No, we realized when we finally got all our stuff out of storage and started putting furniture

and bits and pieces back in the house, we didn't want to hold a lot of stuff that we got previously. I think it would be nice though, it is a tradition for housewarming gifts if everyone brings something. I mean, if you, I don't want to expect it, but if you want to bring something nice, it sounds like you got the space too for even a big thing. No, no, we don't actually have that much space. Even we're, I mean, we can all jump in. If you doesn't want to think it'd be nice, if everyone bought one thing and if it is a big inflatable,

you know, if it's a big pelican or something like, it'll be a nice way to remember the day. Sure. I'm sure. I've actually got a very, very funny big polar bear statue that I think would look nice in your house. Let's invite some people. Brianna has written in, she wants to come to the surprise birthday party. Sorry, surprise, Housewarming Party. Brianna, are you there? Yes, hello. Brianna, oh hi, welcome to the show. You're probably just hearing this for the first time that we've got to bring a gift. What do you reckon you'll bring Jack and Bianca? I think I'm going to bring some wood. So when he builds the fire, he can fire up. Yeah, fire wood.

Fire wood. Yeah, it's perfect. Well, fire place isn't actually in, but we'll get a gas fire place. So one of the fact, you know, it looks like a fire, but it's still being wood. Still being wood, being an awesome gas. Bring wood or a bag of gas, but seal it up,

don't because that gas can leak. Brickanna, we don't know where we're going. Another question we need to ask of everyone. You're coming, you've been invited. We'd love to have you along. But are you relatively free for surprise house? Yeah, well, I'm a uni student, so yeah. Great, perfect.

Nicely nimble. You're in a holding pattern. Yeah. It's a category. Hey, Brianna, you did say in your email that you can yell surprise really loud. Yeah. We're gonna you did say in your email that you can yell surprise really loud. Yeah. I'm doing it back away from the phone a bit and just give us an example. Well this is fun browsing the people working past yeah. Okay go for it.

Oh yeah. Jack met some of you. Yeah. That's definitely be surprised. Okay. Thank you. We want you to get right up into Jack's face when you do that. Also, Eloise, welcome. Ahoi to you. Hoi, thank you. We'd love to invite you along as well again, how you, with regards to availability, you're happy to be just on call for a housewarming party? Yes, you're definitely. Okay, great. Have you done many housewarming in your time?

Not many, and definitely not any surprise one, so that'll be a nice exciting element. You have definitely. Okay, great. Have you done many house warbings in your time? Not many, definitely not any surprise one, so that will be a nice exciting element. No one has it's a first. What are you thinking gift-wise? Remember, no size limit. I'm thinking maybe some safety equipment for Jack's poor wife, so when the house eventually does collapse, they're not hard at all. That's a great idea.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Safety equipment and some sort of like inflatable, rubble capsule. So the equivalent with you, caught an avalanche of something. Yeah, yeah. The one with his big, like a zaw ball. The two are not room in the house for a zaw ball, Jack. Well, she just wears any time she's at home. It would be nice piece of mine for her.

We don't really have room for a zaw ball. Just a roll room to room in a, in a collapsed, broken bowl. Do you think the houseable. Just to roll room to room in a collapse probe. Do you think the house is that we can roll room to room? Should we give them a plus one? Yeah, I suppose. Well, how many people total are we? What do you buy? A lot of things we can get.

Yeah, at least what are you vibing? You want a plus one? Oh, yeah, why not? Oh, great. Yeah, I'm just making it all a plus one. Everyone's got a plus one. Jack, when do you think it's gonna happen? How do you guys operate?

I guess two weeks, in two weeks from now, I reckon it would have been done. We'll be bored enough. I can feel like we can keep adding elements to this for weeks and weeks. I tend to agree. And do I get surprised in the house or do you tell me, like, do I come to an episode?

So say we're recording the episode like today and you're like, aha, surprise, but this is the day of the housewarming. Come on, let's jump in the bus, let's go. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, you have the whole ride, you live a long way, we have a whole ride to prove yourself. No, there'll be Bingbong. So you've got a ride in the house, okay.

There's 30 people in the house. I wouldn't plan to hide in the house and wait for you to get home. We're going to hide in the roof cavity, but with no way it's engineered for that. We were going to be outside Ding Dong, you answer. We barge in. Oh, okay, I'm home already.

Yeah, you're home. We come in to warm it. You be home in a freezing house. He's expecting us to hide 25 people in his house. Yeah, well, it's going to ask how you get in. If you're not telling Bianca or you're not telling me, how do you get in there? I assume it's still not at full lock-up stage. LAUGHTER

MUSIC Ando, of course, sifting through some of the special skills that people have sent in is always one of our favorite things to do. Thank you, everybody, for going to the valued and important podcast to form. Some cracking special skills that I wanted to test. I'm not convinced some people can do them, but that'll happen again this year. Sometimes I read when I just go, we just can't be. And I hope I'm not, you know, I've got to learn to go, well, not could be.

Because we've learned on this show. Someone can give you within 10 grams of a set grammage of sliced meat just by feeling with their hand. It can happen. You asked us three 30 champagne hand, what do we get? We got the three 31 I think. Was it? Yeah, maybe three 30 30.

One in close. A spoty close. Oh, I, you know, we didn't think a grape could be thrown that high in court in one's mouth. 31 I think was it yeah maybe straight 30 30 plus body clothes buddy clothes or I You know we didn't think a grape could be thrown that high and caught in one's mouth exactly We didn't think some could some in ducks. We didn't and they couldn't yeah But that's the great thing about getting to test those skills on the show Ticking it off for 29 in you bought one to my attention and I saw this other day I just thought we've got to do this young man called will called Will from New Zealand. Yeah. A Hoi Will, how are you? A Hoi Palad. A Will, thanks very much. You are probably wondering what special skill we are interested in because you did list

a few. We see this from time to time people scatter gun at hoping that one of them might peak our interest. You've got some kind of, you've got some kind of baseline stuff in there like can drink liquids extremely fast. That's fine but we'll be in a boat race. A lot of people can scale. Good at jumping fences of reasonable height. Again, if you set a high fence. I can jump the highest fence in the world.

You know, can't leave the Great Wall of China, something like that, that would have got an attention. But that's okay because you had more. Pretty stretchy skin. Yeah, again. It was another, but I like how on a stringly stretchy skin maybe, but I like the still. But will. You're an honest guy.

You're not going to go, I'm a human sugar glider. Yeah. If you're not, you know what I mean? How stretchy, how stretchy, how stretchy, but it's not going to stretch that long. No. How stretchy, it's not going to stretch that long. How stretchy is it? Oh, I mean, have you seen those lizard that have like the things that go straight out from their neck? Oh, from a neck lizard.

From a neck lizard. I reckon I look a bit like that when I do, I mean, it's a good, probably, three fingers length. Wow. Yeah, sorry, just to be clear. So when you pull your skin out from your neck. Yes. Yes. The from a neck lizard though, it's almost as body width you pull your skin out from your neck, the front neck isn't though,

it's almost as body width when it pulls it out from its neck. So you're not getting it that far, but you're getting pretty thin. It's pretty thin. Again, spot on. I'm glad that's pretty stretchy, but it's not stretchy. No, no, we were interested in, I think you know the one that no other person has ever claimed they can do this on a show. That's what we wanted to test it. they can do this on the show. That's what we wanted to test it. I can identify where on somebody's body they are being slapped just based off the sound. We'll lose 100% every time.

Oh 100% there's exactly the level of confidence we like. Can you do it down the phone? I hope so. I mean, it relies a bit on pitch and volume, but I'm gonna trust that that's still gonna get a cross on the phone. So you're like, you've got a clear line. This is a lovely trans-tasman line, we're on the moment.

And we've got some very high fidelity microphones here. They should be able to catch the pitch and volume. You know what's on the line here, traditionally a Hamish and Andy coin. Now they are pegged to Bitcoin as their base currency, which is bad news. Taken a bit of a bad ring, but it's still some thousands of dollars worth of coin you be getting.

If you get three out of five, he can have a regular coin. If you get five out of five, he can have an eight coin coin. An eight coin coin. No one's ever won one well, and you could be looking at an eight coin coin today. Ah, I'll be thousands of dollars richer than I am now. Yes, you're right. Well, we will have five body parts hit. My body will be the parts.

Hamish hand will be the hitting. What kind of things are you listening for, Will, when palm strikes body? Well, I do have to ask that it is on contact with beer skin. Yes. Is it health? No, no. It's not going to be Andy's back through a park or something like that. No, no, no. It's not going to be Andy's back through a parker or something like that. No, no, no, no.

We'll be basking. Skin on skin. Royal doggan. All right. All right. I'll just rely on pitch to tell me the amount of flesh and volume. Or we're on the body and length for density is the goal. Okay.

Well, we'll do it all at the same distance away from the microphone. Yeah. What's going to move over is the other mic that's going to register the go. Okay, well, we'll do it all the same distance away from the microphone. Yeah, what's going to move us to the other mic, we'll, that's going to register the slap, we'll then jump back on these mics, and you're going to have your guess, all right. So there will be quite a generous sort of three-second thinking time. Yeah, yeah.

All right, Jacko, you ready for your first slap, Will? I'm ready, I'm ready. I'm heading across to the slap zone now. I'm heading across the slap-and-be now. 3, 2, 1. I'm going to go. Is that just above the hip? How far above? Like a hand? Hand-wink? No. It was a long way above it. I'm going to go.

Is that just above the hip? How far above? Like a hand? No. It was a long way above it. How far above? Up there like a hand and went. No. It was a long way above it was there. It was my cheek. It was any of the cheek.

I clapped my cheek. That is above the hip, though. That's why we clarified how I look forward to the next four guesses being above or below the hip. And that's the right one. I could have been a little tricky for you there, well, I was no as easy as you think, because it was a gentle air slap. I'm not saying it was would have been pain free,

but I also had then Mike to contend with. So it sort of affected my backswing. So don't feel bad. No one would have expected you to get that straight out of the gates. Here comes slap number two. I'm preparing forap number two. I'm preparing for Slap number two. I'm watching him. Three, two, one.

Oh, Chris now I sound a flishy. It was not the back. Of what? Of the shoulder. No! It was not. It was the back of the leg, otherwise it was the calf. In the leg circles. You must get three from three now to win a coin I'm warmed up

He's going to know your body. Yeah, yeah getting to know its density. Well, here comes a must win one for you Okay, I'm heading across now to the slap zone Three two one 3, 2, 1 How is it? It has been performed. Am I not asked is it mainly fingers or is it full palm? Great question. For that I actually was just finger contacts. I can still feel it stinging.

OK, all right, then I'm going to have to say, was that on the bicep? The bicep? The bicep of wash. Oh, no. There's not many bicep. Will, it was on the buttocks of a parade. The bicep of the leg.

That's why I was a little longer in the lead up because I wish was- And he just basically put his pants down when he's ankles. Well, what was then to be a bum slap? Which was, why are we choosing this area? I don't want this giant hairy ass in my face. Give me a select piece to slap. I don't need the whole thing

So unfortunately will Would you like what about if you get one more? This next one more for honor. Yeah, one more for honor. No, you could get a token of no value Yeah, yeah One more for honor will one more for honor. It'll be a token of no value. Can't stress enough, no value. We're gonna do a test. Send him in a boat. Three, two, one.

What's that? Chist. What part? What are the? Chest. What part? What are the chips? I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I hope it's installing. Is it a pick? No, it was a tummy. Unbelievable. Bad luck. Never tell anyone that you can do this.

Ben, you say 100% at the start of this? Yes. I may have mentioned that. Never tell anyone that you can do this. You say 100% at the start of this. I'm not a mention that. Well, never tell anyone you can do this. I stick to this stretchy skin stuff. And the reasonably high fences. But we will send you out of Taku no vales. Yeah, well we're going to give you Taku no vales. Again, that's really his skill of no vales.

Cheers, mate. Go ahead. Cheers mate, good night. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate.

Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate.

Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Cheers mate. Yeah, it's okay. It seems like you're totally fine about that. Well, you'll find out how fine I was about it at the time, actually.

Beck and I have a fish together, my girlfriend, and a fish called Fido, that you and I actually sent back. Yeah, it was meant to be a dog. Yeah, you promised to a dog. She wanted a dog, and they were doing Uber puppies where they sent out dogs in Uber, and we got a guy dressed up as an Uber person, go with a big box with just a goldfish inside for

herbifishies and expertly pounced on her excitement. Yep and the excitement of the whole office we've got a bit for you here. Hi I've got something for you, a cubital surprise. It's from Uber. Oh. Oh Hey, Beck How do you like uber fishies? Yeah, everyone is like why we got a gold bitch in our office. Yeah, where are the puppies? I think I heard someone yell, I hate you so much. She's a background. So that fish beckypped.

You adopted it. And we adopted it. It became our fish. No, I don't. As a fighter. In memory of what you wished it was. Adority. Yes. Anyway, I've had the fish, I'll keep for it very greatly. For a while.

It's actually, yeah, it's lasted a long time. I've seen you carrying for it. It's really beautiful. You've never seen a bond between man and fish. Like Andy in Fido. It's three and a half years or something. How many nights have we called you up and gone? Gone to the pub, made a call. Fido's doing something really funny.

I don't want to miss it. Anyway, we went overseas last year, beckoning out for a holiday, Poppy and Shamus, her boyfriend, Poppy is beck sister, came and house sat. We got a home from the holiday. How come you didn't ask Jack back? It was a cousin war with your clothes.

Yeah, we figured that, you know, you've had a good one. You've had a good one. You've had a good one. You've had a good one. You've had a good one. You've had a good one. You've had a good one. We figured that you know, one of the guys was shy. He left the door open to my house on three different occasions and the neighbor had to close it. Anywhere or my clothes. Um.

I only wore out-of-layer clothes. Yeah. Jumpers and dance. Yeah, I know what we know in out-of-layer dance. No worries, Jack. Anyway, we came, we should have had Jack, because we came back and Beck was very excited to go see how Fido was doing and when we got up to the top of the stairs, Fido looked a bit different. Still a gold fish like,

but certainly had slightly shorter tail and more of a plummed chest than Fido used to. I can't age. I'm not sure whether he was doing a different exercise regime or eating any differently while we're away, but I smelled the fish. And suggested that maybe it had been replaced. Do you say that back straight away? I quickly took out my phone to film. Because I thought this would be good audio for the podcast.

Back turn around started crying and said it's been replaced. I don't think it would fight anymore to which I stopped filming and went, I'll send for kind of fear. Just taking this a bit more seriously. I heard, and Lise is here today. She works with us here. I hear that the thing is, they'll try to get away with it. They'll try to get away with the fish repotter.

You don't swap a fish and not try to get away with it. Lise, were you around when the fish was being swapped? Yeah, but it's unfair to say that we tried to get away with it. I saw you were in this team as well. I was dropping something over and Poppy was a bit flustered. Oh, you're in accessory. So it was a roundtable discussion over several weeks. Yes, they had.

About what we should do. They bought it in Beck's mum. It was actually quite traumatic for all of us, but then it became quite funny. Even worse for Fido. So how did Fido die? I had a few issues in the past, I feel, hadn't I? I cleaned up my health with a left combination of complications.

So then who made the ultimate decision? Who said let's replace it? In the end, we're all like, at the end of the day, it's going to be better for Beck if we just replace it just emotionally. Do you know what I mean? It's not, it didn't matter about us, because it would have just been easy not to get another fish. Sure, yes.

There's one detail I don't think you guys know, because this is our deep, the discussion's got. At one point, because we knew the Beck would look really closely. Yeah. And so you're right about the little tail-y fins, but bits being shorter. Yeah. And Gabby, Beck's mum, said,

what if we say it was sick and we took it to the vet and they had to trim its fins? Fins, fins, fins. And I was like, just don't know that that's a thing that she might buy and they're like, the Gabby and Poppy are like, she will. I don't think they did too many fish surgeries with the fish out of water.

Little snip on a table. A little, little, little, little, that's how deep this is right here. Right. Now I was quite fine with it, but I feel like Poppy deserves a little bit of, well, please explain. Yeah.

See, look at how much you're on the other side. So, hey, can you ring Poppy or Shamers till the group equally responsible? And I'd like you to call, I'll probably be at work, call them as a medium. Someone who has, of course, who's been,

it's true at God, is chatting to someone in the spirit realm. Yes, you've been chatting to someone who is, I'll be joined to fight it. From the other side. Yes, and this gets advanced. I can do that. We'll call Stowe's Shamus. Okay, do you want to try the Shamus? Yes, great knowledge.

Hello, this is Shamus speaking. Is that Shamus? Yes. Shamus. My name is Jonathan Misman. How are you? I good, thanks. Very good, thanks. Hey, Sham shown as I am actually a medium a specialise in contacting those near and dear to us who have crossed over to the other side entities that have passed over and I've actually been communicating with a loved one a soul close to you. What? Do you know a fish called Fido? Do you know a fish called Fido? A what? A fish, a goldfish named Fido. I've been communicating with Fido's spirit in the spirit realm.

And I am very familiar with Fido. He sounds... You know Fido. Well, I've been talking to him and he wants to know why you and Puppy let him die. Well, I don't know if he can remember me, but I know he does. Yes, he does. Oh, the girls. Yeah, he knows puppy pretty well.

I think he's angry at you both. Is there anything we can do to make? Well, he's dead. You can bring him back to life. You already tried something. There didn't you. He wants to know why you thought it was okay to replace him. Well, we thought it would be a good idea to pay tribute to him.

He found it himself. And he wants to him. He found it himself. And he wants to know where his mortal body is. So does he so? What can I do to repay him? Nothing mate, he died on your watch. You've committed the ultimate sin. Well, Fada, he forgives you, but unfortunately not poppy, so you break that to her. Thanks, Shane.

Oh, okay. Speak your seat, but... Thank you, Saved Out. $75 a session. Thanks. Stone one.