Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2019 Ep 56

Episode Date: June 12, 2019

1. Golf cheats2. Drum lease3. Being a real Jack4. Chit Chat Champion Plus5. 4L Milk6. Just 2 guys and a hot rod7. Sticks and stool package...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 A list-snap production. Activate your internet. Because the Hamish and the Podcast starts in 3, 2, sorry, still buffering. 1. A hoi to everybody in the future future because that's where you are now when I say this That's true of course we're not recording this live nor are we recording it in the future which would make you in the past But I ahoi to you him in the present. How do you Andy? How do you jack you ahoi? You ready to shoot the stars today baby? Did a dream? Yes, I do
Starting point is 00:00:42 And ahoi to match That was a bit weird wasn't it? Well I was right, just to press off. Yeah, it's not my spot on. We've done very well this year to get rid of the hand breaks in this segment. Lastly we need to do a pool jackpot and his inability to speak. Release the hand break.
Starting point is 00:00:59 Matt, a hoydem match, what's he up to today in England, I believe? I don't know, he's attached to the pronoun. We're in a miss and Andy and Jack I suppose. It's Mr Matthew Stranger here from Preston England. Today I've just set off for another day Burtfoot walking. I'm currently 500 kilometers into a 2,700 kilometer Burtfoot walk, Ginnish wall record attempt
Starting point is 00:01:20 that I'm doing for charity. So peace I've got some walking to do, catch his letter. You don't want to walk in torque? 2,700, is that a miles thing? Maybe that's what like four miles, 4,000 miles or something? Jacob, he, no, it'd be less miles. Oh yeah, what, sorry.
Starting point is 00:01:36 Yeah, so what is that like, whatever, 2,000? Sounds more impressive in kilometers. So you'd always be saying that. Always, because I'm going made it. A barefoot walk. That's incredible, isn't it? You'd pick your terrain. Wouldn't you be allowed to go in a loop?
Starting point is 00:01:48 Yeah. Because otherwise you might find yourself at the end of a row. If there was a rule. I'd go to a large carpeted warehouse. Yeah. And just like that. I guess I get a carpeted treadmill.
Starting point is 00:02:00 Oh yeah, but yeah, okay. I mean, it is still walking. It is still walking. Um, carpeted treadmill. There are three specific items to purchase. Oh yeah, but yeah, okay, I mean no walking it is still walking Carpet in treadmill there for a specific items to purchase Yeah, I'm not sure I do the Guinness record thing, are you know, we're you know to two thousand seven hundred kilometers? Yes, I'm aware me just send us the carpet master five thousand All right good luck. Well good luck to man. I could like man. What a wonderful and worthwhile thing to be doing I the charity's worthwhile, the walking is,
Starting point is 00:02:26 if it is in a circle, it's pointless, but the charity's worthwhile. If it's Guinness, we'll record. To achieve a great thing. It's, yeah, well let's keep, let's keep, send us another one to tell us whether you make it. Maybe permission to,
Starting point is 00:02:37 and hopefully we get the WhatsApp set up, so it's a little easy if you can just send it in. But, yeah, we'd love to know who makes it. We're all for any kind of record or achieving on the show, we'll support. And you can attach any audio files at www.habitstiny.com. If you've got time. If you go there very easy.
Starting point is 00:02:51 Cause maybe you work, spend canceled in your area and you've got nothing to do all day. Got plenty of them. Less than a hundred clicks you can polish it for the seedliness. Ah. It's very working on the WhatsApp. Very easy.
Starting point is 00:03:04 One touch. Very easy to do. Hey, let's kick this off this week with something that we've tried in the past. It's a cross line prank. Essentially. It's difficult. Do go to the super high. And you speak to someone in your life.
Starting point is 00:03:19 You then go hang on a sec, ham's calling through. You then go hang on, I'll put you on a hold. Then you and I have a discussion, but I'm right here next to you, but it sounds to the person. On the phone, like they can hear me calling you, and then we can talk about the other person. I'll fight street noises. For five of you to street that, I'm still elaborate. So they go, I'm going to sec, I can, I'm meant to be on hold, but I can hear the calls have been hacked. Yeah, we've merged.
Starting point is 00:03:45 The secret, the supposed secret that you're gonna let in on now is that I cheated on a golf trip to Tasmania. So you're a radical hogs. Then at some point you'll go, hang on a sec, ham's going me. I call up and I'll go cheesy and a tell hogs about cheating. A golf, which I'm led to believe by you saying telling me before, that will be upset.
Starting point is 00:04:09 He would be furious if that was the case. Did you cheat? No, I didn't. You'd say that. Okay, okay. Let's do this. Jack, are you going to all set up? Yep. Hey, mate. Hey mate, how are you? Good. Good to hear. Good to hear looking forward to tonight.
Starting point is 00:04:28 Yeah, and tomorrow. Five o'clock. Five o'clock. Yeah, I'll see you at five o'clock. And tomorrow probably more importantly. And you're right. Say no, no bees, I was looking forward to having a few bees tonight. Hang on, sorry mate.
Starting point is 00:04:44 Hey, I'm calling Phil in the other line is, he's getting lunch for me. Once I put your own hold, I'll put your own hold, I'll come straight back to you. Once I get back. I got this. Hey, me there.
Starting point is 00:04:53 And I, yeah mate. Annoying, Nand, I'm here as well, boys. I think I might get a, I might get a spud or maybe Indian, but I'm happy to go either way for you. Let's go spud. Sorry mate, I'm just standing on the line to Hawks. Oh really? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:10 I dare you to merge the calls and I'll tell him about you cheating at golf in Tasmania. I like to tell you that. No, no. Okay, mums the word. My lips are sealed. Sorry, did you say Indian or spud? Spud, spud, spud. Alright, I'll see you in 20. Okay, cheers mate the word my lips. So did you say Indian or Spad? It's bad. It's bad. I'll see you in 20
Starting point is 00:05:29 Who you there? Yeah, sorry about that What do you mean I He was there you try What do you mean? I heard that he was there. You drive? I know. What do you mean? What do you mean? Sorry, it's just...
Starting point is 00:05:54 No, I heard. I heard the conversation. No, you couldn't have heard the conversation. I just... I've put you on hold. You lied. I'm not. I just I've put you on hold. Your life. I'm not. You said something about you trading it to his brain. There's something. I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:06:18 You could hear. Could you? Yeah, right. Now he was just joking. So we, uh, we'll see you tonight. Um, Yeah, right. Now he was just joking. So we, uh, we'll see tonight. Um, yeah, right. All right. All right. Sorry. Okay. Bye. I do feel like he, he knew something was up to me. I mean, during the, during the call,
Starting point is 00:06:43 he was shocked that, yeah, the hold hadn't. And since we've hung up, I reckon there'd still be doubt, he'd be still sitting in his desk now with an element of doubt. Here we go, I heard admission of cheating, which he suspected, he's suspected all along. But I think, I should call him back. We gotta get it.
Starting point is 00:06:58 Now, this is the first time we've done this, we need, we need like a victim's tape on whether this is a successful way to have fun on the phone. Yes. I mean, it's going to be two fails with Beck. It was like, well, we kind of got Beck. I think that's a guess. It is a guess.
Starting point is 00:07:13 We need to be feedback. We need to do a market research. You're doing. All right. Jack has got the number he's putting it in. I mean, we're really one thing. I want to take us in and have a good experience. I want to we were hoping you'd ever got me. Hello. Oh guys. It's Hamish Noodle here. How are you mate?
Starting point is 00:07:33 How's it going? I'm I heard that you accidentally heard my phone call before. Yeah. You're on to us weren't you? Did you... What did you think happened? You switched... We switched lines. Yep. I mean, I was there. But why were you there? Did it feel like some sort of phone error?
Starting point is 00:08:01 Probably. Well, I called out today before you talk about anything God. Oh, me, God. All right. Yes, we did hear that, but then we kept going to join the record does show that you tried to do the right thing. Yeah. Hugs, it was an elaborate setup to see if you would say anything. If you heard me say to Andy, hey, are you going to tell Hawks about cheating in Tasmania? Because Andy thinks you think it's possible they cheated because I got such a good score when you guys all played golf in Tasmania. So that crossed your mind. I was thinking, when did you cheat at Tasmania?
Starting point is 00:08:37 I'm still doing it, but now I know, yes, we're very skeptical at that. So I think if we've gone more info, like if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if any, gone, oh yeah, yeah, we all hid in the bunker on the floor, and I get invented the scorecard. If, if I'd given more info, would you have, think thought it was a prank, would you have thought that you'd heard something, something you shouldn't have? Um, yeah, I think, oh, yeah, it should have been more, I think it's bottom. So if you said, don't tell him when you kiss Kate that time. Yeah, oh right, your wife. Yeah, yeah. So you reckon like ratchet up the bombshell that the other person's
Starting point is 00:09:17 like saying on food fee fact. Yeah, this is great. This is what we, I wish you could do this with all prank calls. Yeah, you could have a good debrief afterwards to go. Where do we go wrong? How could the experience have been better for you? What would have devastated you more? Yeah, right. So you think a real bombshell. And why didn't you?
Starting point is 00:09:34 Because then I'd be like, oh my God, he has kissed her. Yeah. And I'm just like, I can't even approach that with you. Yeah, OK. And you reckon you wouldn't have had the guts at that point to even say, hey, I just heard that you kissed my wife. You'd prefer to go, let's see if I'll see if it'd be a still life.
Starting point is 00:09:51 All goes brain would go. Just follow that one away. I'm gonna lock the drawer on that. No, come back to that one ever. Okay, that's great feedback. I've almost tempted to wait 10 minutes and do it again. Okay, two great wins here. We've got good feedback on how that thing works and Andy hasn't kissed you off, so everyone's
Starting point is 00:10:16 winning. So I can't see you for a bit at all. You can see that. Right, or I'll see if I can. See you. I think it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun.
Starting point is 00:10:28 Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun.
Starting point is 00:10:36 Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun.
Starting point is 00:10:44 Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. during the week over the weekend, whether did the bands split up or are we in hibernation? Well, I was gonna, this is my question for you guys. We're gonna get gigs coming up. Like, I was gonna do not know any better gigs coming up because we haven't gigs since 2017. The closest we got was going to Andy's brothers band and we were watching the crowd and we felt that band joy was there and we thought, well, we're all here.
Starting point is 00:11:04 The last formation and it is etiquette in band circles if another band's in the house to invite them up to play one song. And he's by the band's shunned etiquette. We don't have any giggas coming up. I don't think we've got giggas coming up. My brother's there, we've got gigg. Yeah, but for us, cool boy. Jack, have you had any giggas coming up? I don't. Off the top of my head. I can't think of any. Yeah, right. Yeah, no, I haven't had it
Starting point is 00:11:29 He's coming up because I was just asking just I mean, I don't I don't need it to lock any gig today But I suppose we haven't really discussed the future of the band and I just love to know where we're at I'm I want to make you still drumming. I always yeah, yeah, I want to make this He tried to give me his drum kit. Actually, but. Oh, well. You tried to give Jack your electronic drums
Starting point is 00:11:50 and you're like, I suppose that's what I, that is something to do with what I'm bringing up today. You think you're selling the electronic kit? No, no, mate. Just hear me out. You see that? The third one. This is the van meaning,
Starting point is 00:11:59 I've got the talking drumsticks in my hand. Okay. I was just thinking, since we don't have any immediate gigs on the horizon, I'm more of a game day player. There's been some discussion in my household as you know electronic drum kits take up quite a bit of space. They've been in the garage right near where we keep the pram and I suppose every day as we wrestle the pram pass the drums. It's causing some bother, whether it's me using, I'm fine. Why don't put the drums behind the pram?
Starting point is 00:12:27 No, they get tangled up. That's where the mics go. Okay. We've tried to tetras it a few different ways and it's just... Don't get me wrong, guys. I'm the drummer of the band. I'm deep into the drums, okay? But without a song coming up... Can't it fold down? It's folded. Oh, all right. Without you ever played them for months then.
Starting point is 00:12:46 I've, I've, I've, I've, I've worked on rhythm stuff, but not on the drums. Okay. I've been working on percussion. But you know, if anyone follows Jack on Instagram, that's what I was thinking, Jack, you're making heaps of music at the moment. I'm sure playing. I am not, I want to make this absolutely clear. I am not selling the drum kit.
Starting point is 00:13:02 I'm not giving it away. I'm the band's drummer. When we get our next gig, I'll be ready. But, Jack, I notice at your house you have a music room where you're making music. I'd be interested in leasing the drums to you for $1 a week. No, that's what I should take to store them. Like if you go, if you try to take the drums to a storage place, you would have to pay $1,000, they pay them the cost $1,200 mate. So you get I would be happy to store them for free
Starting point is 00:13:29 You are able to release them from me for one dollar a week No, I think that is fair to dig in here Jack because he's got four dollars for a month I'd like you to ignore Andy's advice to dig in and I'd like you to loosen up. I would like to acknowledge that the fee is a dollar a month. What is it? A dollar a week. A dollar a week. And I would like you in good faith to waive the fee.
Starting point is 00:13:57 That's interesting. Alright. That's interesting. So how about this? What about this? What about this? What about this? I will...
Starting point is 00:14:05 It is a dollar a week. It is a dollar a week. Jack said he's willing to again. It is a dollar a week. And it's flowing from you to me, leasing them. So I'm putting these drums to work and putting my drums out on the street, and adding me a little bit of coin. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:19 Plus a one month bond. Mm-hmm. That's a $4 bond. Mm-hmm. I'll need the bonding cash. I will wave the monthly fee for the first six months I'll wave the weekly fee for the first six months. I'll wave the weekly fee for the first six months. May I have a word to Andy? No.
Starting point is 00:14:33 Sounds like a pretty good deal. This is what I'm seeing here, though. I don't want to give over any money. Not it more on principle. No, it's a russes there. You've just tuned into the podcast. We just saved you 50 episodes of Catch Up. That's all you need to know. $4 bond, which you can get back. You're actually not giving any money.
Starting point is 00:14:58 I'm holding the bond. And you then are leasing the drums from me for $1 a week. For six months, with a six month free period. Yes. I'll waive the first six months of lease. And then it is a dollar. And then they return to you the drums. No, no, then it is a dollar a week.
Starting point is 00:15:14 When do you want them back? When we need them. When we get another gig and I need to start, because remember, think of the benefit you're going to have of this premium electronic drum gig. Mata reminds you, I bought an extra tom and two extra symbols. Four dollars upfront for the bond. I'll pay no limit on the monthly lease of you waving at Goodwill.
Starting point is 00:15:36 So, I'm limited free rental. I'm limited free rental, but you get the four dollars upfront and you deliver After six months it goes to one week free one week paid On off on off on off and you pick up you've got a you You charge you pick up feed. Yeah, yes pick up fees 50 It's you gotta pick about you're gonna come to shop. Yeah, come to shop. No Hey pick up fees 50 dollars Jack. It's really good. That's our control. No, the shop. You're gonna come to the shop. No. Hey, pick up fees $50. Jack, that's our control. Mate, the drum fee here. You got a bunnings, I think they do $29 you hire for an hour.
Starting point is 00:16:10 If you lease a drum kit from a store, you've got to go and get it. I feel like you've gone high on the pick up fee, Jack. You've got to go and get it. Absolutely, I can't actually come. I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't.
Starting point is 00:16:23 I can't think of a music store. I can't think of a music store where you don't go to the store to get the music alive. Yeah, what's happening at the moment is that you've... Well, Hamish has stayed the same, where he thinks he's leasing it. And you entertain that for a while, now you've turned into a storage facility. And so, it doesn't actually make sense for a pickup fee. The pickup fee doesn't make sense. You're a acknowledging your own. You're a acknowledging your own. I'm leasing.
Starting point is 00:16:50 It's like going to coals and going, I'm judging you a pickup fee. I will know you can't be here to get the goods. That's a good point. That's a good point. Pobbon, I'll come for free in the you. Yeah, no money changes hands. Ever. I'll bring it back When you need it that's interesting well, but you've got to give me the $4 bond Which will be refundable when you return it and then no money you are leasing it at $1 a week
Starting point is 00:17:15 I'm waving the I'm absolutely away the weekly fee for the first six months It then alternates no because I this is my can a negotiation and you've just gone back to what you first negotiated That is what I'm so confused. I didn't know it is what about this I'll wave it for a year after that we go to weekly And unless you return no because I don't want to be stuck on some program where in three years time you go It's a no-locking it's a no-locking It's a no-locking contract. You just return Yeah, but then I've got it say I've got it shoved down the back of my house I'm here for three years.
Starting point is 00:17:46 I go, oh, hey, she's drum-kid, you go. You owe me 12, 36 sold. I think I don't think that's gonna happen, Jack. I mean, we're talking about, yeah, we're talking a year of, you're talking 52 bucks, free rental. $4 up front, and I'll pick it up and drop it off when you need it at my discretion. Four times a year max.
Starting point is 00:18:07 No, no, no, no. That's a deal. Deal. Yeah, there's a good deal. Deal. Deal. Four times a year, dropping off your idiot. Idiot.
Starting point is 00:18:17 I'm in a team three just for you to think it was. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha You're going to get on to Chit Chat Champions soon. Sorry about the feedback in your face. I just got socks on there. Too relaxed. Sorry. Let's do this, mate. That's really shit for the stars today, guys. Well, good negotiation, you guys have just done.
Starting point is 00:18:41 But it remind me, Jackie, I think your quote during that was, I don't wanna pay anything. Yeah, I just, it was more of a plea. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was made me feel a bit sad for you. Just begged, I just don't wanna pay any money. Everyone's just a big, it was a negotiation. Everyone's just a burden, but let's just hear it again now. God, don't wanna give over any money.
Starting point is 00:19:00 There's over time, it's a desperate plea. And it reminded me of an email that came in. Oh great. From Ben, Ohoi Fellas, I just thought you'd be interested to know that Jack's name is quite fitting for his personality. Hmm. In the army, in the army, anyone who's doing something to benefit themselves over others, or not doing something
Starting point is 00:19:21 at the detriment of others is called Jack. Jack Post. Oh, just Jack. Come on. And it's actually named after Jack. An example of this might be there was a box of cupcakes left in the office for everyone to share an individual takes all the cupcakes for him or herself. Yep. If that person was caught, you would say something like going Jack on your mates, are you?
Starting point is 00:19:45 So, I mean, really, since, doesn't it? I've never heard that. Well, you haven't served. This seems like the kind of behavior we've witnessed from Jack time and time again. We just heard about it. Let's have a quick never listen to that grab again. Go, don't want to give over any money.
Starting point is 00:20:01 Yeah, so that's great. Enjoy this newfound information. Ben, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, in it. So, you're with the... Yeah, you did, yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:26 You get a fence for a track suit. That was more of a prop and you just decided that you would... It's kind of... it's called stolen valor. When you run around making people think that you're in the... In the military. Stolen valor. Yeah. So, you just go and jack on the country.
Starting point is 00:20:40 Oh, really? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha on the country. We're really. Hahaha. Hame. Obviously, people podcast for free and bat our old. All our old shows, if you go to our Hamechnani app, some people listen to the Hamechnani app. There's a 2,000 shows from yesterday that people can listen to. 2,000 of the best. Well, not the best. Well, 2,000 of the whole lot. 2,000 of the catalog. And probably a hundred of the best.
Starting point is 00:21:10 And I think it's like seven bucks for the year or something, it delies into all the viewers. It's a lot of lots. If people didn't get, you wouldn't have done for anything else. Some people have been going back through that. And you remember, I think it was 2007, 2008, where you accidentally gave the front half of my phone number out in one year.
Starting point is 00:21:29 And then the next year gave the back half of my phone number out. I've got a lot of listeners. And I received this call yesterday. Message received yesterday at 4.55pm. Okay, I wasn't expecting this. Did that really look like you were listening to your old podcast? 455 PM. Okay, I wasn't expecting this. Did that be a lady? I'm looking, I'm reading, listening to your old podcast, and I think I'm going to
Starting point is 00:21:50 summarize across your number. Anyway, you're probably going to ignore this message, but I'm loving the show. I'm loving going back, and I think, right, I've got a good day, Andy. I want to catch you later, because I'm not going to call this number again. But, yeah, anyway, so yeah. One of my best aliens. I'm a really to call this number again, but yeah, anyway, stay out. My name is Elliot. I'm a really good chitchat champion. I should fill that flag in now while I've got the chance. Yeah, should definitely get me on the show. My chitchat is amazing.
Starting point is 00:22:14 Even though it's pretty bad now, what's going to be? Anyway, love you guys. You do great work. Bye. I thought, what? There's no better contested for chit chap champs. Let's play that now. Chit me with your best chat! Not her away! Chit chap champion!
Starting point is 00:22:34 For people who don't know this game, we are testing how everyday people go at keeping conversation going in a social situation. Just keeping the ball in the air, you don't have to be funny. You don't have to be outlandish. You just have to keep the tempo of the conversation going, like you do at events, weddings, birthdays, where any place you've got to make small talk. And we frown upon heavily.
Starting point is 00:22:56 It's not like a rule you can't do it, should be, with questions. You can't just ask the question back. Points will be deducted for questions. You've got to be brave enough to step up and take the reins of the conversation. Elliott joins us who called me yesterday. Elliott, well done mate. Congratulations, a holy welcome to the show. Oh, holy. And I mean, it's got it's, we've only had maybe four or five people ever. Cracked the code. Cracked the code. So well well done to code it and he's the same number since we're at uni together so it's still still live you definitely change that yeah you've given a lot of secret yeah but I don't
Starting point is 00:23:32 mean the man hours involved in rolling and going back to it yeah I mean you won't share that you're not going to share that how you did it you're not going to share the episodes yeah yeah well done Ellie yeah people have got to do the work and it was a terrific message mate, because I loved it. You said, not gonna call it again. Just test it. It was everything I'd want to hear. Yeah, it was my number of being.
Starting point is 00:23:49 I got out. Elliot, we know that you rate yourself as a chit-chat champion. You're against a Joll today. Joll, how are you? Ahoj. Ahoj boys. How you doing?
Starting point is 00:23:59 Yeah, very good Joll. Joll, what are you doing your life that you think helps you with your ability to chit- chat right up there with the champs? Look, I'm not the best, but I've been doing a lot of wangs lately, putting in a bit of effort with a small talk, so I'm quite reconciled. So he's in form. He's just had a run of hot forms, that's perfect, and then he gets to play in the big leagues just off the back of that.
Starting point is 00:24:20 Now, I know both of you guys have heard the segment before, but same rules as always, Andy and I will do an identical conversation to each of you you'll be on hold you want to hear the other guys attempt obviously and we are looking for timing you're never you're you're not given a cue you have to feel it out that's the fun of this area feel it out for when it's your turn to speak and there's a group of three good luck let's put Elliott on the hold. Yeah. Let's continue with Joel.
Starting point is 00:24:47 You still there, Joel? Still here, standing in. Elliott's gone. Best of luck. Here we go. So, right for the party. Oh, hey guys, I heard that it's a kiss the rock band or a touring game at the end of this year.
Starting point is 00:25:01 Oh, great, great. Yeah, I read that they're back in the make up now because for a period they didn the end of this year. Oh great, great. Yeah, I read that they're back in the make up now because for a period they didn't wear the make up. Yeah, my mates actually rode you to that tour. Yeah, he said he walked past and doing the make up the other day. You can't beat me.
Starting point is 00:25:16 It's good job, it's alive and it's pretty good. You don't need the rule book book we said you can't lie. Nothing at all. It does. It's all quite awesome. We were doing the make up. Like, where was the thing you'd mentioned, you mate? How's being a roadie going?
Starting point is 00:25:34 Great, I won't pass the boys through the make up. Well, I also found them amazing. Where does that conversation go next? Because we go and say is he seeing them doing? Hey, who's your mate? Hey Joel, bring us a picture like all these things. He's done. That was the tour he started.
Starting point is 00:25:51 Another one wasn't until December. A short term game. A short term game in the conversation there. Joel, you got the attention but I would ultimately learn to long term demise as you were exposed. This is a big lie. Thank you. Joel, I would love to see some ofterm demise as you were exposed. This is a big lie. Thank you. Thank you. Joel, I've got to be in love with it.
Starting point is 00:26:07 So the wedding is you've been at. So what do you do, Joel? I'm actually, yeah, F-22, wrapped apart. Yeah, there are many birds. We have even a fun with them. And a few bummin' runs. Are you getting any pictures? No, I'll have to take it.
Starting point is 00:26:21 Joel, well done. We'll put you on hold. Thanks, boy. Joel goes on hold and we retrieve Elliott, Elliott. Hoi, you back? Hoi, yeah, for me. Beautiful, Joel has, he's lodged his attempts. You'll get exactly the same lead in Convo, good luck, Elliott. No worries.
Starting point is 00:26:38 Oh, hey guys, I heard that kiss the rock band touring again later in the year. Yeah, great, I read that they're back in the make up this time because for a period they didn't wear the make up. They didn't wear the make up, that's weird. You think they would all return? I'm assuming they're tung like that. They've probably got faces that are a little bit less than they've designed. Oh. Oh boy. He knows. He knows. He knows.
Starting point is 00:27:06 He knows. He knows. Is that even a phrase left to be disowned? No. Let's bring Joel back. Oh, Joel. Oh boy. You talked a big game.
Starting point is 00:27:22 We've got an interesting situation here. Joel just flies out live. And you took off running and then fell down. Yeah, I'm going to call this way, Ham, and obviously we're both judges. I want to see if you think this is fair. I'm going to give Joel the win because it was crazy. And it was confident to the end. Unlike it's only a... If I come with less confidence, what do I have one?
Starting point is 00:27:42 Is that Elliot saying that? Yeah. Yeah, that's Elliot saying that. Sorry, Elliot. You just kind of started with a question which already put you on the back foot. And then you, to buy yourself some time and then you got less confidence with your responses
Starting point is 00:27:55 or whatever, then I think you said a made up word or phrase. So yeah, you didn't win, but Joel did use a trick, which I think we should ban in future. A lie. What did he do? He just lied. He just lied. Ellie and he just said he made was a rodeo on the tour and he saw them.
Starting point is 00:28:12 He's made told him he saw them doing the thing. So Joel for the win, you are... A dishonorable win. A dishonorable win. You can get yourself a token of no value. Ellie, thank you very much for playing and thanks for the call. other Elliot if you disagree with the decision you obviously have the phone number you know who to call to argue the case up for hours I want a lot of children champions of my time yeah good good thank you mate And a food science is advancing.
Starting point is 00:28:48 There are really there's two big questions in the food game at the moment. And it's sort of like in sports. Like what's the, what's the hundred meter record at the moment for you? Or you say, is it you still you say? I think it's still you say in nine point nine two. I think you got a nine point six at the stinti. Really?
Starting point is 00:29:02 Nine fives, nine six nine and a half. Go close to nine point six. Wow. Yeah.5, got close to 9.6. Wow. Yeah. I know. That would be on that. Jack, you know, pay Ewa sleep. Sorry, I'm trying to Google it. The media meant it to me.
Starting point is 00:29:13 It looked like her eyes were closed. And you guys are the boys are talking. This usually takes five or six minutes. I might grab a bit of a shot. I've been... 1.58. I'm a 5.8. So you've broken number six.
Starting point is 00:29:24 So you have those barriers, because growing up, the premise of cool runnings, the famous film about the Jamaican Bob State team, all those guys could run the 100 and under 10. That used to be the limit. But human endeavor, we keep breaking limits. That's what humans do. We keep progressing. Why do you climb the mountain because it. We keep progressing. Why do you climb the mountain because it's there? Yeah. What do you go to the moon? Did I? A couple
Starting point is 00:29:48 of other reasons to it. Yeah, which is weird. Like a genie thing. There's two big frontiers I've noticed in the supermarket that are being broken. You've seen those three litre milks? Yeah. Yeah, they're doing them now. They're really big. It really begs the question, will we ever see a four litre milk? Yes. And if so, will we ever see a five? I think they could be humans ever do a five lit milk. I think we'll see a full lot of milk. I think we'll see a four. They will see a four before we see five. But the problem. I've seen a four. Wow.
Starting point is 00:30:23 Oh yeah. I haven't checked every bit. But it's normally like a school camps and stuff like you're not seeing for consumers. Yeah, you don't see the supermarket. Oh, it's a Costco thing. Yeah, like a big cash income. Yeah. But the problem they've got from a consumer facing level is you still have to have
Starting point is 00:30:47 Handle and the thin Everyone likes their meal has to be in the so it's some eventually you're getting to it being the size the shape of a briefcase Yes, exactly But with a handle which would slide into the it would be the shape of it but they're handle of the end and then at that point You'd almost put a you wouldn't put a lid on it, you'd put a tap in it. And so you come to the fridge and tap your milk out, like a big task. And that's why, and now we're obviously just mimicking the conversation scientists are having
Starting point is 00:31:15 as they try and develop a five liter milk. We've probably been so big that you actually slide it on the shelf like those 10 packs of Coke. Yeah, yeah, again, but I don't think that's, I reckon that would deter users. I think you're right, we're 10 pack of Coke cans, isn't even four liters, three, yeah, okay, but I don't think that's, I reckon that would deter users. I think you're right, we're 10 pack of coke cans, isn't even four litres, 3.75. So, it's bigger than that, volume wise. It's so much milk.
Starting point is 00:31:34 I like the beef. If you see me, it's free, Jack. No, but I can picture a four-leaded tub of ice cream and then I use that measurement to imagine what milk would be like. What a brain. What a brain. The people having trouble imagining. The people that have trouble with rectangular prisms. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:31:56 That's good. Okay. What's the second one, then? Rice. Rice. Quick, quick, quick, rice. We all remember the sachet. You know those sort of vacuum sealed sashays?
Starting point is 00:32:06 Cook it in 90 seconds, right? I don't know how long this has been around for, but science is really pushing that boundary. You now can get the individual cups of rice where you just peel the top back a little bit. Yeah. Sometimes you get a rice and quinoa mix, where a brown rice family,
Starting point is 00:32:20 and not interested in the quinoa mix, but each is owned. Understand as well, some rice produce many different types. We like a Kinwamix. Oh wow, interesting. And a four litre milk. But I think it's the same across the board. The reason I mentioned that is I think
Starting point is 00:32:33 that generally the cooking time of the Kinwamix, the same as the rice. But you peel it back in the cup and you put it in. I went to put it in for 90 seconds last night when I was doing some rice at home. I don't know why, because I'd never normally do this fast and worse. Clanced at the back of the pack,
Starting point is 00:32:49 as I was putting in, it's down to 40. Wow. It's cooking in 40 seconds now. I almost double cooked the rice, but that is not fast and worse. I was wasting myself 50 seconds. I couldn't believe it.
Starting point is 00:33:00 Question being, will we ever see a 30? I think we will. I think we will. I don't know how that would be. I don't know how that would be. Will we ever see a 30. I think we will. I think we will. I don't we ever see a 10. I don't know how that will we ever see a 9.58? No. We won't see it sub 10. Don't say no. No, we won't say that. I think we'd need advancements in microwave technology as well. I'm not ruling that out. Okay. Maybe we will see a 10. What I what I do see in the supermarket which I'm against is on packets where they go cook for 40 seconds on high
Starting point is 00:33:27 or a minute 20 on medium. No one knows what they're not going to do. Like you go, why? Why would anyone go, oh gosh. And a bit more cautious today, I wouldn't mind doing the medium. And you know what the problem is too in this rice situation is
Starting point is 00:33:44 I can't remember if this is sunrise or not, so it might not be. Whoever this rice company is we've used, I feel like they're heading headfirst into a lawsuit as well because on the back of the pack, it goes, cook it for 40 seconds, fluff it, they give you an option to fluff it with a fork. But then they go, serve it piping hot. You're going to burn, you will burn so that you're telling them to serve it piping hot. You know, it's always, it's always be cautious, be cautious. Yeah, they tell you to serve it piping hot. I'm sure people have seen this before too, like right in if you've got this right, this is the most dangerous rice on the market because they are telling you, servant piping hot, they're crunching down, like they're absolutely, because these
Starting point is 00:34:23 guys got to be at the forefront. They're crunching down the numbers. They're figured out how to do a quick cut rice. They're telling you to put in your mouth boiling hot. This is rice for someone like me who's got, who's very busy. We don't have time to cook. We don't have time for it to cool down. Cook it for a little bit. Eat it piping hot. Well, they're the two frontiers. So you heard it here first. We will see a sub 10 second rise and we might see one day of four litre milk Hey, we've mentioned on the show in recent weeks that we have decided not to do a lottery No, started as an idea to go wonder if we could do a lottery that simply everyone give a dollar Yeah, and then one person from that pool just wins it all. And that's legal. And of course as soon as we said that, we just said, hey, the laws exist in this land for a reason and who will we'd ever, ever bend those laws.
Starting point is 00:35:13 Even though it'll be very fun to give one reason. And we thought it would be more of just a friendly kind of game of happenstance, not a game of chance. Just an, and we thought the friendly vibes might carry it through. And we've since been told by the Good People at Podcast One and just a couple of people that have read the whole book of the law. Look, it might contribute a few of the ideas
Starting point is 00:35:36 set down in the law. So look, be they right or wrong. And a lot of people probably think they're wrong. Not for us to say, of course, no way would we do that, particular maneuver, even though we thought it could just be a harmless bit of fun amongst friends. So instead we're building a hot rod. We're building a hot rod.
Starting point is 00:35:53 Now, we didn't completely throw away the idea of using Kickstarter as a place to after go phone me for a bit. We've landed on Kickstarter. Kickstarter seems like the right place to offer people the chance to donate $1 to our hot rod effort. Yeah. Gosh, I hope we've landed on Kickstarter. Kickstarter seems like the right place to offer people the chance to donate $1 to our hot rod effort. Yeah. Gosh, I hope we make it.
Starting point is 00:36:08 Yep. Uh, we're excited to make this hot rod. Yes. And now it seems much clearer. It's two men making a hot rod. Boy, I hope they do it. Yep. And we're getting...
Starting point is 00:36:19 And you can donate $1 to hopefully make the projects secede. You can only donate once. $1. But if you are one of those people that donate, I think those guys making the hot rod would also like to say thank you. In a way of their choosing, had a later date. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:36:33 So we tried to sit down earlier to nut out exactly what we're gonna write on our Kickstarter page, which goes live tonight. Yes. After we finish recording the podcast. If you listen to it now, you should get it together. It'll be up. It'll be up.
Starting point is 00:36:43 And simply that's all it is. Ignore all the stuff we said at the start about how it was gonna be a pool of money and one person would win it all. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do.
Starting point is 00:36:52 I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do.
Starting point is 00:37:00 I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do. Forever down my track. Okay, Ham. Yeah. To give a little wink to people who... No, that we... You're a bit worried? No, this recording is...
Starting point is 00:37:12 This is about... Really at its heart, this is about... We're building this hot rod. We hope we get it made. Dollar maximum to help us get the, you know, parts, oil, paint, hot rod magazine,
Starting point is 00:37:24 you know, we don't know home, hot rod magazine, you know, we don't know everything about hot rods at the moment. As a thank you, one lucky contributor to the hot rod project, we're gonna make it an extra special cash thank you from us. Thanks for being part of the project. I don't think we can set it. I don't think we're allowed to say it.
Starting point is 00:37:38 Get a cash thank you. That is an extra special thank you. We would like to thank them in any way we choose. Yeah. I don't know why you keep looking at the camera and not putting this at the front. Well, it's good. Just, you know, in case the government sees this,
Starting point is 00:37:53 you don't own the way we thank people. So, hey guys, we can't wait to make this sick hot rod. Yeah. Well, thanks for getting on our campaign. Yeah, hey hot rod fans. Yeah, good, good, good. Hey hot roders. Hot roders.
Starting point is 00:38:13 Thanks for backing back this hot rod project. This hot rod too. I don't know. I think that's right. Hot rod seems more like a guy you'd hire for your numbers 50th. This is my rod guys. Okay guys, I've never got it for an hour, I've got it for 50 minutes. So 30 of those just serving drinks.
Starting point is 00:38:32 No touching, Lindsay. Okay. Bam. Please only give a dollar. Yeah, but yeah, like eat yet. Remember, maximum one dollar. And please leave your details as we would like to give a very special thanks. I'd like to give a very special thanks to one hot rod enthusiast.
Starting point is 00:38:57 Check out the sweet peaks of us appearing. Here's us on day one of the hot rod journey. Yeah. Obviously legitimate. And then I think we just go, look, it's going to be a huge task. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:17 That's why we need as many people as possible to donate $1. Hope we finish it. Yeah. Because we might not. Do we think Yeah. Cause we might not. Do we put cars we might not? Yep. Yeah, you don't recover. Under this stage, word of mouth,
Starting point is 00:39:34 because people don't know, but they're not listening to the podcast and going there. And they're disappointed. If we just say, we don't end up finishing a hot rod. Oh. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, don't end up finishing a hot rod uh okay okay don't spread the word you might be going to spread the word don't actively spread the word
Starting point is 00:39:50 don't actively spread the word but also don't actively keep this a secret no one will say just we encourage everybody to spread the word of the true story of the full story the full story so to not to a true story behind our love
Starting point is 00:40:06 of this hot rod project it okay great done great and then at the end of something cool like keep you know stay good like winning you know can you be as cool in your rods hot as I do? Absolutely, that's going in. If we end up doing the giveaway, the winner has to say that. Yeah, that's going to be the phrase the Pope. The phrase. Awesome. Yeah, got it.
Starting point is 00:40:43 Sorry, I was just thinking about what wheels we'll put on it. Yeah, exactly. So that'll be live. I think we'll have an up next wheel. I think we'll have an up next wheel. Yeah, basically. We'll put a link up at Hamishane.com if you want to go to help us build the hot rod. Yeah, thank you.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Of course all contributors could be. Yeah. Jolly thanked. Yeah. Jolly thanked. Yeah. Yeah. And when we're getting here to the podcast, we bang through it. You know, like we've got we hit the bell. We reset. You're into the next thing. I don't know if you picked up on what was said here in the studio just a couple of minutes ago as we're sort of going from segment to segment. Jack, it's dawning on Jack. He's getting a drum kit.
Starting point is 00:41:26 He's very excited. Yeah, that's right. I heard. And I go, can I come around to night and get it? So suddenly, oh, the boy who was too scared to have the drums in his house now is thinking about- He wanted to play four dollars for six months. Can't handle getting drums for free.
Starting point is 00:41:43 So he does play, he pays a dollar a week for these babies, but I waive the fee. Yeah. I can't waive the bond. Then he goes, oh, can I have sticks? Yeah, I heard that as well. I didn't know you wanted sticks and stool. Oh, stool didn't think of stool, yes.
Starting point is 00:41:56 We didn't discuss that. Oh, it's a stool's part of a drum kit. No, it's not. We didn't discuss stool. Yeah, right. So if you, are you interested in sticks and stool package? All right.
Starting point is 00:42:04 That is a $1 a month cash. If you play for a band and you go to the head rowdy, hey, set up my drum kit and he didn't put a stool with me. I've made a mistake. I'm not your Ody. You've gone to a drum. This is remember I am a drum leasing business. And you have gone to the store and you have asked for a kit. I want a... Would you like the sticks and stool package? Oh, using kitchen chair. Actually. Okay, come on.
Starting point is 00:42:29 I'm offering you, don't think about this really carefully. I'm offering you the stool and four sticks, four high quality sticks that we used on the tour, the best you can buy. I'm offering them to you for $12 for the year to lease. Think about the convenience you've got to buy with that $12 versus you've got a kitchen chair using two wooden spoons to buy the drums. I mean you're mad if you
Starting point is 00:42:51 don't take the sticks and stool so far. This is how they get you and her. That's how fun it is. It's all about the add-on cost. Jack, I just before just to have a note. No, this is a slippery slope because you go, oh, did you need the screws that screw the symbol to the... All screws included. I've... I've... I can't get it. Donald Trump, Donald Trump,
Starting point is 00:43:12 the story's been business been. And you know, I got him to throw in the screws that hold the table together. Jack, can I say that I just quickly Googled how much you can actually rent an electronic drum kit? It wouldn't be cheap. I don't imagine it'd be cheap. 10 bucks a month. Sorry, 10 bucks a week, is it?
Starting point is 00:43:32 Yeah. The cheapest one, but we can't say it's cheap, but I think you've got a very good quality. It's actually top of the line. The cheapest one you can get. That wouldn't be a roll on the V drums. No. The cheapest one you can get. That's your drums.
Starting point is 00:43:43 How much are drums, Andy? It's the two. Drumsticks. So drumsticks to rent per week. Why the reason why quickly Googled is because there's the $1. There's no way you can get in here. You can't be upset with the new. The stalls seem very much included.
Starting point is 00:43:57 Oh, good point. But for $40 a month. So you can pay me that and you get the store for free. Or you buy the stalls and sticks package. And that's $12 a year. Now, can pay me that and you get the store for free or you buy the stores and sticks package and that's $12 a year. Now the other the other difference though I'd say, Ham is that these guys like having their drum. This is here. I just made. You just close a lot of I premium issues. I could close this whole thing down now and and be playing the drums to my heart's content with my state of the art stool
Starting point is 00:44:27 and the best thing for if rock sticks you can get. What are you gonna do with just a stool? Mate, I don't care, that's not the argument. It's like I'm gonna get out of the canards. You don't get out of the canards higher on the weekend and go, we've got three cherry pickers. What are you doing with them? Are you going home over the weekend?
Starting point is 00:44:40 So give them to me. That's what happens for the space. If you've got a store you're still fine. Stools fine, we're gonna storage cover for the, Stools and Sticks doesn't bother me at all. But for you, you could absolutely save yourself a world of hassle and look cool when you're making music on Instagram
Starting point is 00:44:53 with your state of the art. So it's $12 bucks for the year, was it? Dollar a month for the Sticks and Stools package. That's pretty good. All right, wait, one last question. How much is just the Sticks, no, stool? 10 bucks. Ah! So we're chucking the store for two bucks.
Starting point is 00:45:06 For the year, that's good, Jack. No, I'll use kitchen chair and I'll take the sticks for ten dollars a year. Fine. You're an idiot. Just need a little win. Thanks for listening. The Hamish Nandy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamishanandie.com.

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