Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2021 Ep 124

Episode Date: March 24, 2021

1. OnlyFans Update 2. Chit Chat Champion 3. Nelson the Fruit Thrower – Special Skill 4. Shunned by a Russell 5. Tracksuit search continues 

A list-nuff production. Activate your internet. Cos the Hamish and the podcast starts in three, two. Sorry, still buffering. One. A high with a capital A to U, Hamish. A Hoi with the full set of capital letters, two exclamation marks, and an anchor to you, Andy.

Thank you. A Hoi with a lower case A, but a capital H to U Jack, like at some kind of new app. Oh, yes, you would see. I have a lot of a Hoi back to you. I thought, actually, thought Hamish or a Hoi had too much fake gusto in it with all the capital letters and explanations. Sounds like you had that prepared. No, no, no, no, no, no, no,, I know. It's been years of long for the shave. Well, it's still a beard. I know you were getting,

Jack was getting a lot of heat about looking too old. Is that why you've gone a bit shorter? Yes, someone guessed my age you're full of five years above what it is. Wow. And coming from somebody who used to, I always got, yes, younger than what I am. So I've somewhere along the line,

I haven't even realised, but I look now older than I am. Probably it correlates with you getting up to do breakfast right to your boyfriend. If you're wondering. Why hate to lot in two years, be honest. Absolutely. Yeah, definitely. 100%. You're an old man. I look at photos that when Sunny was born, who's now six? I look at the photos of me there and I'm like, who is this fresh face boy? And then you're just like, oh, that's it. You're great, you're great here. Just just dried out skin.

Yeah, just all the way to sleep. All the time. Yeah, and you've had the thrill of the hours of having a baby Jack with none of the human connection. He loves Christian. He loves being a baby. He's connected to the list. I, we're both lucky enough to be in on a show, Andy. the human connection. He loves Christian. He loves Christian. I, we're both lucky enough to be in on the show, Andy, and quite often you will see Jack

our holding Christian to his bosom in the ad break. So Christian is like his giant child. That's true. I'm a hoi also to Rob Brown. A hoi boys. Received a lovely Christmas gift this year. I've got a $32 call flute box left under the tree that came with a bonus book. So well done, well done, it's been a great read. Hey, Mish, Andy, and number six. I had a double-powl move pulled on me at the local Dan Murphy's. I kindly let a motorist out. I pointed to him, pointed to where I wanted him to go. He, he, he, he, he, Julie followed suit. Then he wound down

his windows, if to motion a thanks to me. I've wound mine down and he's given me the old number 12 down and dash. I was a bit flustered after that and didn't really know what to do. But hopefully you guys might be able to give me some advice should I encounter this moment as a second time. Thanks boys, keep up the good work. What's the number? Quick question, what is the number 12 down and dash? Is it number 12, maybe the middle finger as if it's pointing up to 12 on a plot?

Yeah, I mean, I assume that's what he's done. Yeah, the guy who's sitting in the bird, but I've never heard that sound before. Rob's gone, you go there, which is the very first power move we had on the show, pointing to someone who has to move in traffic anyway. You go there. You go there.

Yeah, we put out white. And then the guy's done it and then returned fire. Yeah, with another finger base. And then, another finger base. Finger base PM. Yeah. Well, look, to be honest, I have an absolutely spit-boying here, but he did ask for some advice. I think I know the answer is anyway, but if someone

gives you the finger and you did, and you cover your eyes to show them, it hasn't been received. I like it. Who is the winner out of that stand-up? Because the person holding the finger for longer, hoping it gets through, it's still you are in a position of vulnerability is the eye coverer. But into the car. It's probably not. Yeah, in the, in like this, in a drive-through. Or does he, you should have a, have a little bit of a, a take-through. So I'm seeing you give me the finger in the head.

But I can see you peeking. Can you see now? I've not, yeah. But I'll be wearing a studio right there next to each other. I can. But I can see you peak. Can you? So now I've got, yeah. But I've been wearing the studio right there to each other. I can absolutely, I can see you peaking. Jack, and from it, from if you were a different car? Maybe, because as soon as I know you're peaking, I feel amazing, because you are hiding,

you're terrified to look at me, but you're still a peaking. It does mean you have to hold the finger for a long time. You have to completely cover your eyes and listen to the sound of them driving. I like the idea. Hey, couple of quick updates. How Moos book, of course, last week was the order,

was the option there to buy the dishonorable second run, which is, of course, people that weren't quick enough to get the book in its first run. That's why they just had no issue with the dissonner. Yep. They accept it. They're flocked to it. It's nearly sold out. It is nearly sold out. At the time of recording, it's nearly sold out. So if you hear this one, you jump on, hopefully you can get it otherwise. I don't know, we're going to go through this again. There's not a dissonable third run,

I don't know. We'll talk about that. We do talk about the second edition, so Power Moves Volume 2. That's what it is. Maybe when we do that. And we'll just do a second edition we later on. But yeah, maybe when we do the second edition, would we sell the box set? Oh yeah. And a lunch box.

Lunch box. I'm just adding bonuses now. That's not about idea. Power foods. Anyway, that's not a bad idea. How are foods? Anyway, I don't know. But anyway, we have to be at www.harmishary.com if you want to check it out. The other update we have to do is the only fans update. Yeah, I have.

I have. We had a stumble. We obviously had the stumble, which was the situation where I mean, it's bothersome getting into it. No, I'm just saying there was a URL situation. It was like if you went your only fans website that I've been curating. Curating facilitating, yeah, monetizing for the fans, very cheap. Well, she was, you can go $5 a month. Is only Andy 24, 7. that's the name of the account.

Then someone actually got the app, like only fans forward slash on the Andy 24.7, that's not us. So we are only fans forward slash a official only Andy 24.7. So we're a official only Andy 24.7. If you do it, it doesn't matter. So little people go in there, and I think there's a free trial.

Because we soft-launched it. Just because we soft-launched it. That was the mistake. Floppy is launch of everything. That was the rigidity of a launch you would normally want. It was a noodle that had been in the water way too long. It was like watching a league around. If you're watching SpaceX have a rocket launch,

and it turns out they were just launching one of those wiggly men from the car. I mean, the space. So the bottom took off and the head flopped out. So it was a very floppy launch. Yes. However, the now that we sorted out, the fans that are figuring it out and getting through, and there are over a hundred.

And you just do, just over a hundred, I would say, and you just do what it seems to be. There are people leaving tips. It seems like people will leave in tips, and they are in terms of the tips. I'd say and you just do it what it seems There are people leaving tips it seems like people will leave in tips and I am a Me too. I would say because it's I want you to just feel the gesture if it's over $20 total that it'd be the Standing and guess what it is yeah, okay people want you to feel the gesture the sharing you've been You go more more more give us more we want more of this content you also have only uploaded three pictures I've told them we're aiming for semi-daily and we're not like that semi--daily, it's weaklet. No, no, no. It's semi-daily and more vids coming through just putting some edits on them, finishing the edits off.

You can't start to. The thing is, I didn't want to, since it is a soft launch. Who's snapping the nerve out team? Because you did someone's just trying to catch me. You didn't use a generator. What do you mean, user-generator? Team-generator. Sometimes I get you. No, no, we can't. We all keen to feed the fans, feed the beast. And you don't have to tough take it off your plate.

One less thing for you to do, so you can focus on what you need to get done. There's a free, apparently there's a free trial for a month. Yep, great deal. Let's just, let's check in with this in a month, and if there's anyone still there. There will be. No, it's actually created the quite a movement

Just quite a sub movement and now the fans are chatting to each other I think There seems a couple of messages Well a couple of messages have been answering to it like oh my mate got me onto this You know they may rob and stuff and like so the fans know each other and it's just a fun thing for a group of group of friends to do I don't it it is. And anyway, they're loving it. In one month's time, fans are loving it. We've only had one person, Dromboff. That is a good retention rate. What did I send to you the other night, Jack? And this was a, this is a week ago, after the soft launch, before we clarified, you know, exactly what the, you know, because there

was an imposter on there trying to just cash in on our hard work. Even during the soft launch before we clarified, Jack, yeah, you see, you see me a screenshot of somebody who donated $5.20, I think. No, but the only fans they tell you what percentage of creators you're in, even with a soft launch, when the top 21, it said you're in the top 21%. Of course. They're rocketed by now. That can't be right. That's so bad. It's such bad news for only fans.

No, no, no, no, it's such good news for us because it's so bad. Did that mean just like local area or something? Must be. That can't be right. Why don't you local area? No, it's just saying, hey, well done, you know, you're connecting with people. They're in. They want more.

Give them more. They're very much not. But anyway, one month you've got, we'll check in and see if anyone's seen it and you can help us. Can I get us through the month? Something hot. This is the, but this is the trouble that I face here a bit, Jack, is the curator. I'm trying to satisfy this beast. They are chanting more, more, more. We want more and you won't. No, just a top off. No. There'll be no tops off. There's nothing. I have access to a top off that I've not used.

What do you mean? I've not used. I have access. Anyway, just saying, please send me one. No. No one. That way you can get the lighting right. No one goes.

Please no one go. And please don't do it. Please do. I'm going to have to step in here and override that. I'm going to have to say to step in here and override that. I'm gonna have to say it as the curator of only Andy 24-7 or at official only Andy 24-7. Please go and enjoy the content fest.

It's an absolute, we're serving up lots more this week. One month. I must remember that more. I'm a flurry of people over the government mandated three month break. We're writing in saying give me a shot at Cheat Chat Champions. Yep. Well, obviously we had busy shows early, but it's time I think. It's time, Amanda, to test people's ability to execute small talk flawlessly.

As we always say, the rules are you can't just ping back with the question. You have to add something talk flawlessly. As we always say, the rules are, you can't just ping back with a question, you have to add something to the conversation. And then I will have the identical piece of small talk with each other. We won't indicate when it's your turn to talk. That's part of the skill of being good at small talk. You identify the right gap and you approach it with gusto

and something that's interesting enough to keep the conversation along. We've got two competitors standing by so let's jump into it. Chitney with your best shot, not a roway, chit chat champion. Dane, how do you Dane? Oh, how are you boys? How are you number six? Hey, good one D Dana. Dane, what work or hobby do you have that requires excellent chit chat?

As a job, I'm a physio therapist, so quite big on the small talk. And a lot of face down chat too. So you'll be good at this. You have practised, so your clients are face down. I don't know how you do it. Don't you? Maybe you lie down next to the Fisola Darity. It's very progressive. This guy's therapist.

Yeah, obviously, you know, he's not saying that you'll save your knees and your hips. If you lie down too, will you treat them? Or you say, good, I'll do this no look. But you're facing a similar thing here, Dan, because you'd be good at chitchat with no facial cues. I mean, you don't get the eyebrow, you don't get the head nod,

you don't get any of the things you get in real life. And that's what you need in chitchat champions. It is a purely audio format. I like your chances. You've obviously probably done a bit of physio on a lot of sports people as well. Yeah, sports is probably our niche area, yeah. And they are good underclutch situations.

So maybe during that kind of chat, he's got a few pointers with regards to being under pressure. Well done, Dane Conner. Dane is your opponent. A opponent, a hoeie to you, Conner. Hey, how are we going? Hey, Mishandhi and the recording messed up. Very good, Conner. Now, what's the next thing you have to do? It's a text in Irish Lill which puts you genetically in the top one percent of talkers globally. Like Kenyans, right? Oh wow.

I mean, it's just you've just got the skills, the gift of the gab, the crack, Connor. What do you do, what do you do, day to day? I'm going to tell him Scrooge. Again, both physio and coaching, you require a small talk. I put it this way. You're both in situations where you, it's in your professional interest not to let conversation lag.

Yeah, it's kind of the onus is on you to keep the chat up. Yeah, because it can't just be a coach, not chatton. No, it can't be a physio that's decided not to talk. Okay, we're gonna put Conor on hold, Dane, you're up first, and you'll both receive the same conversation. You ready, Dane? I am ready.

Good luck. Oh, good anda. Hi, man. He was reading an article the other day in a magazine. It's saying, there's no real reason. We eat three meals a day. Oh, recently I've just gone down to two. Now, I'm a big three-mail man myself.

I've got to have Breaky lunch dinner. Why? I just reckon they're essential. I get too hungry by lunch if I don't have Breaky. Oh geez. Why not that? That's a way to work. Yeah.

I was hoping for, not even a chance to giggle at you, which is our favorite part of this. It was good. I will say critically, is that absolutely nothing wrong with the performance stage? Critically. Really, okay. It didn't kick, it didn't, there's nothing wrong with it.

Do you miss opportunities for it to be at Stannis? Didn't wow us. Didn't wow us and didn't kick the conversation that far down the road. It's interesting. I'm hoping for a bomb on the other end. Oh, well, if you've absolutely registered as solid score. Which normally is more than you need.

It was downhill skiing. It's like, okay, you've done one flip. You can't be beaten. Now, see for the goal. But if the next guy lands on your head, you've absolutely got it in the can. Okay, good luck, Dave. Okay, Dane's on hold. Connor, have we got your back, Connor? Yep, yeah, you didn't hear any of that, did you? No, I did not. I had a very long hold. Can be nervous on the bench, good luck Connor. Yeah. And I was reading in a magazine the other day, but no real reason, we have three meals a day.

Oh, I've recently gone down to two. It's interesting that you go down to two Andy. I would recommend probably a five, but I think Jack would probably be on a five meal as well since he's falcon At the moment, but me personally I always think before like the morning couple of snacks in the day Nice long piece of piece of chat. It's like, it's not a big self-analysis. Self-analysis.

Got a head you feel about. Yeah, very, very nervous on the staff. Yeah. It was a personal knowledge. And then, yeah, I did it at the end. I thought I'd finish strong. I thought I'd finish strong. Yeah, it was definitely an interesting one because it was a sort of attack, attack, Andy.

A little bit like a few barbs at any then a big bar, but Jack, and then just sort of pull back into the defense with a nice personal anecdote at the end, but by that stage the conversation had been going for quite a while. In for it was a swimming race you missed the start didn't you? But boy did you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, which is strange, whenever I undived it and you were already in the pool, Which is strange, whenever I undive, did a new already in the pool. I was backstroke. I would say also then having missed the start tried way to make up for it. It was still both very gallant attempts. It was good, but it was

like watching a swimmer try a few different strokes during the race. You didn't sort of come home with freestyle, which is the preferred stroke for speed. So Dane, of course, the winner today, a token of no value ahead Dane's way, congratulations Dane. And really good try, I kind of wish you good day. That was great. That was good, cheers. Good, cheers.

Rude, top quality cheatchap from both. Absolutely. Just a nice solid performance there from Dane. Loved it. was good, cheers. Good, top quality chit chat from both. Absolutely. Just a nice, solid performance there from day. Loved it. Thank you, fellas. Hey, I'm just going to discuss last week we're going to get Nelson in free. His special skill, I'll remind everybody of what it is because we've gone out and done it today. It was epic.

It really was epic. He wrote it. There was a few key elements wasn't there to the skill. He said, I can throw an orange or other similar fruit so close to the roof without attaching the roof. That you will go wow. That was close to the roof. And the wow bitch.

Yeah. The wow bitch is the important factor because it's, you're right. In any, think of anything where something's getting close to something but not touching it. Like if you're in the classic one, when you're parking at the supermarkets, shopping center and you go, and you don't have a K-EVN old car without beep beeps and you go and have a look at this. You go and have a really close and everyone walks around the front of the car and they

go, wow, that is so close without touching. That's what we're looking for within two and a half centimeters and we go, wow, that is so close without touching. That's what we're looking for. We're in two and a half centimeters, and we used to say Andy, sorry, to just back on the curfew, when we're at uni together, you really knew the parameters of your car. That was a, that was a, probably my earliest exposure to special skills.

That would have been yours if we listened to this show while we were at uni. I would have written and gone, you gotta test my friend Andy. He really knows the parameters of his car. He can drive it through in profile if team that was invented back. He can drive through narrow spots at pace that you wouldn't think he should be driven through. Certainly not at the speed he goes through them.

And it's it isn't in Tara and he really knows the parameters of his car. And you would park often get very, very close to the wall. And we would get out and we very very close to the wall. And we'd get out and we'd have a look. Wow. I mean, I'd say, wow, you would say normal and walk off. So you were saying, you used to know in the parameters you car, but I still amaze to see a man that did know that parameters too such an extent. We thank you, him. Appreciate that. Lovely, lovely, lovely. We've been honest. We pick up the action though after this wonderful open out with Nelson outside the pub

in which we're going to test you skill. This fruit is made for throwing, so that's just what he'll do. One of these days Nelson will throw and wow the pants off you. Nelson, welcome. Thanks boys. Thanks for being our friend. Thanks for being our friend. Oh, I'll give you the elbow. It's nice.

OK, so your eyes lit up when you saw that I was having three oranges. Well, we did say it's said you could throw an orange or similar type fruit. You please, it would just wait with orange. No, orange is my strong taste. Yeah. Makes sense, it's the most spherical

of the large round fruits. You could argue that a grape or passion fruit just in some circumstances just beats it. It's also part of the top five fruits. It's also part of the top five fruits. It's classic. It is. And I also feel that if we gave you a pair,

super unfair in case it rotates, in case the top half rotates around unlocally. That would have been hard. So orange it is, your eyes are immediately scanning the three oranges I've got in my hands. What are you looking for when you select an item, a fruit to throw as close to the roof as you can when you're touching it?

We don't want any like dimples or anything because we'll affect the ball flight. So it's got to be very spherical. Yeah, that's an orange. But the color just gets the vibes off. All right. It's awesome. It's like the emotional side of the game.

Yeah. Well, these ones have this demo-on-like little bit. No. This one has more of an in-ie if we're talking about belly bones. Is that a good thing? I think definitely. Because you have to get, what are we saying millimeter one? That's what we hit that.

That's what we mean. That would be the stint. You don't want any protrusions. No, you want a perfect sphere within two and a half centimeters of the roof That's what you see you can get every time first time you'll be loud That's actually say wow. I was when was the last time you did this This skill about like two minutes across the road this skill about like two minutes across the road We was the last time you did it before you knew you were gonna be on the world stage. Oh no to regular thing Yeah, I listen some. Yeah. Oh, all the girls love it. Yeah, well. Yeah, have you ever Like got yourself a date or a kiss from the move. Well, that's the plan today

So it's what we're here for You go to have a news as a young man, you got two. You have the fireful. This is the fireful. And I like maps as filled up, so this is the way we're doing it. Perfect. Obviously, we can't leave, have a practice. No.

Inside. The whole skill is, as you remember on the show, the whole skill is one look, one throw, two wows. That's for man-a-ving. But you can have an unroofed practice just to get the weight of the orange. So I want you to have a little chuck of it around, see how you feel about it.

Remember, this is unroofed, so there should be no pressure. This is purely the man-orange, man-fruit connection. Wow, it's a very firm. I like that. I like that. How often do you go to throw one and it's careful to apart of being too juicy? As a sighter there is a leaf just hanging probably like one and a half metres above you.

That's what I'd be doing. Do you know what would have been close? I'm close. I can do it on Muleys in a while. It just touched it there when you do it in your back bit. But you're getting the reins. I didn't really say well. Just for his practice, too.

But I haven't said well. What's the biggest crowd you've ever had to? Oh, maybe like 45. Right, so everyone has to hush. Oh, it's right. And it gets ready. Yeah. Kevin, we're getting ready.

Yeah. Should we hit the arena? Let's do it. Let's get upstairs. I'm ready to say well. All right, well upstairs hit the arena. Let's do it. Let's get upstairs. I'm ready to say well All right, well upstairs at the pub this is Natural arena is that go to arena and it does feel like a pub game feels like having you do to win a round of drinks for everyone Yeah, today the stakes are a lot high you are playing for Hamish and he coin Wow, which as we know is not pegged to gold or the US dollar

We deliberately pegged the Hamishanne coin to Bitcoin. Smart move is a turns out. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's a big game chain. Got any BTC? Not at the moment, but I'm certainly about to have.

You're on the brink. You're on the brink. OK. When you walk into an arena normally, how do you feel? Obviously, you'd be sizing up your distance. Yeah. I usually have a little range finder.

Yeah. And then... I'm going to reveal something for the listeners that we weren't recording for. As we walked up stairs at the pub, we said, now, you know, you're only going to get one shot at this, and illegally you threw the orange at the roof. I thought of secretly doing it. And you get the roof.

So, I question whether that was a good move or a bad move. Do you reckon it gave you confidence? Or is it? It didn't. Scream confidence. Well, you found that you've got something right. You know you can make the distance. But if you nailed it,

do you reckon you would have felt better now or worse? I think I would have felt better. Right. Because sometimes I get an unerulled and I'm really sorry. Just bang. We're just screaming, autographs. We're committed to one go only.

Yeah. If it doesn't touch, we're going to stop and review the tape. We've got a GoPro strap to the roof. We've got a Hamish and Andy slight devil ruler that is up there and we're going to measure out the 2.5 centimetres. So there will be a moment where we all pause and we have to go to a review tape. But if it's not close enough to do that, I think we'll all just... We'll know. Oh god. And if you hit the roof, we'll know. Yeah. Okay. Are you ready? It's a disaster. It's a

roof. Yeah. Clear mind. I'm ready. Completely relaxed. This is what you're going to want to do. Yeah. Alright. Completely relaxed. This is what you got a born to do. All right, just a bit of quiet everyone. Absolutely. Do you do what you got to do? No pressure. Got all the time in the roof with some force. Was it someone coming out the toilet? Oh, you could have pulled off. He should have pulled off. I thought that his smell was coming out.

He should have pulled off. I wanted to have walked away. He's got my phone. Did he say it's not your fault? Sput! Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, God. Oh, sorry.

Not professional of the host. You've seen, you've seen. Wow, also a, That's right. A shame for those single girls out there that we're wanting it so bad. We have to give you another go, Nils. I guess we're gonna give you another go. I guess we gotta give you another go.

Just for on up. Just for on up. I'm looking up. Bit more of a toilet. Look at why he's not right. Back off. Back off. Is there a token of no value on the cards?

You'll always get that. You'll always get that. But, but do it well. You might be looking at two tokens of no value. Wow. You trade that. The one coin. Good to get it. But do it well you might be looking at two tokens of never yeah, wow Good to go Okay, remember if conditions aren't right. Yeah, like a tennis like Right Got redemption

Got redemption. I'm sorry. It's quite a bit short. I didn't. My life just got to the rule. My life being with about a foot. Well, well, if you want one more go or if you want one more. No, he doesn't. He doesn't.

He doesn't. He can walk away with everything. All the cash and prize money you've got so far. I'm done. I'm done forever. Smart move, smart move. I'm walking out of this skill. Take, take what you've already got.

It is a token of no value. God, the cap's a good laugh. You look, the Simpson guy comes to mind. No, no, no, no. That's a huge call. That's what I'm saying. Oh no. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's's a huge call. That's what I'm saying. Oh, no. That's what I'm saying.

That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. It's just like a worst case scenario. It's a worst case scenario. I'm very saying you don't want to be the Simpson's guy and I'm like here at the pits. Someone, you're in Las Vegas with a friend, things are going fine, he's gone for a way and come back and your parents' house has been more.

Yeah. And you're sitting at the time. We've got to run it back. So my point is, do we want the new saying to me, you don't want to be the fruit flow, the fruit throwing guy, that's tough one. Simpson's guy is easy, or do you want to try and get one? If you're with In the Ruler, we would say...

Within the zone of dignity. I am well above the Simpson's guy if I get it within. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, this is just saved that. I'm down for that. One final throw. In the zone of Ruler. Well, with you. Okay. What are we doing? I think it's the adrenaline.

Oh! Is it the adrenaline? It's so hard, it's the adrenaline. I'm getting old. The people up above when we think of having a party, you're like, stop it up there. Say I'm officially the assistant. You are.

Yeah, you are. We didn't say well. Well, we are saying well. We are. We are saying well. We're not at the brighets so close to the roof. Nelson, thank you so much for putting on the line. Yeah, that's man, don't be sorry.

You've got to take on a no value. We understand it can change a lot when you get to the bigger end. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Wow, wow. Ando, I want to introduce segment on the show. It's a niche segment. Right.

But I think, certainly I would be very confident saying we'd be the only show that has this segment. And when I was scared of niche stuff, most of the power moves are like, you know, I, he is one if you work in a shoe shop and someone comes in, but they want shoes for their hands or whatever. So, Pete's a lot of, I would say would be each segment.

Yeah, we should go get back to Pete's a lot of. Well, yeah, you bought nearly a hundred hats for, that we're gonna give out for you are a Pete's Yeah, we should go get back to pizza a lot of all year you bought nearly a hundred hats for That we're gonna give out for you are a pizza a lot of participant or pizza a lot of winner They're all at my house. But keep saying you get these huge box of hats out of here I have I have a pizza lot of hats Obviously took a little taste for myself. Yeah a little cream off the top But only a participant one only participant don't have the pizza lot of winner hats

But so often says can I straight this hat out and I say, no, you don't understand this, but that's one of the rarest hats in the world. Just people don't know about them yet, we're going to get one. You and I are recently up in Sydney together, people are asking whether we'd even been out to Pino's pizza rea. We haven't. And we haven't, we shouldn't. We're onto it. Peter and we haven't, and we haven't, we shouldn't. We're onto it. This is not that. I'd like to introduce a segment called Shand by a Russell. Shand by a Russell.

So if you've got someone called Russell in your life that's mysteriously shunning you, bring it to us and we'll get to the bottom of it. Right. I've got one. Okay. Hahaha. I'm wide and I kick things off. Yeah.

I've actually built an opener. Go, Jack. Not trying to complain to one of cause of us, but you have been shunned by a rust. Oh, very good. Or rustle. So rustle. Yeah.

So shunned by a rust. Or shunned by a rustle. Depending on how close you are with the crow. Not crow. Okay. I wouldn't be too upset if I've been shunned by Russell Crowe because I don't feel like I'm on a footing to not be shunned by Russell Crowe. Is that a two-be-shun you mean? No, I don't feel like it would be unfair if he shunned me.

If I were to Russell Crowe, you know, and I went up and I said, oh, can I make, can I do mine if I join you for dessert and he went piss off? That would be fair. That that seems fair. That's not really a shunning, that's more just an unexpected exchange. Yeah, see, so who's the Russell in your life? Would it be shunned by someone?

I think you need to be expecting more of them. Yes. Do you know what I mean? It blows me away to say this, and I'm a bit, I feel sad bringing this to the group because it doesn't make me look good. And I still maintain this some sort of problem that's out of this Russell's hands

because he's one of my favorite Russell's. Russell Howcroft. A beloved Russell Howcroft. The Loved by Australia. Now, Jack Wooden like him. Huge fit. Why does he end up against? He's up against Jack and Ray McRachfast radio wars.

But Jack, you're never gonna be three AWs. Yeah. And of course, he was done growing for a for a long time and I loved Grooan. I mean, he still is on Grooan, isn't he? I think so. Yeah. Good. One year ago, good for him.

Good pounder, too. Pretending to not know the hugely successful TV show, your competitor who destroys FM in the ratings is on one year ago, ran into Russell Howecraft, flying back. Last time I went overseas, came over from Los Angeles. Was over there for Gidea La. Like, well, happened to be in town at the same time. Went along for the V, wasn't there for that,

but took the free dinner. Yeah. Flying back. So it would have been January, late Jan, running to Russ at the airport. There's a bunch of us. Yeah. We have a great time.

Having a few drinks, hanging out for a few hours, get on the plane, we're kind of seeing each other, chatting pretty much, flying all the way back. It was LA to Sydney. Getting off, I was, it was LA to Melbourne. Getting off, you know, Russ was talking about, these kids, we listen to his sons music,

he sons in a band, we both go for the Melbourne footy club, we'll tell you what, going to the footy. Great, we change numbers. Okay. Sorry correction. He goes. He goes. Oh, we've got to catch up. We've got to make sure we go to the footy. Yeah. Great. We actually got split up at baggage claim never never didn't see him again. Yeah, but we've got mates that have side text whipper our mate who good friends with Russ. I guess sorry mate. Just spent you know 20 hours with Russ. Can you send me his number? Get the number.

Show the message out to Russ all within a few days. I'll certainly get to say goodbye, mate. Anyway, let's catch up. Maybe hear anything back. That's life. That's the cut and thrust of life. That's a shum though. That's the initial shum, but it's also could have been jet lagged.

It was a few days later. It's not an urgent catch up. Yeah. Think COVID hit and once that you're not chasing up too many russles during COVID, if you didn't already have, that only, if that russle wasn't part of your tight orbit, yeah, I wasn't going to be throwing out during Melbourne's lockdown. I went this all in remember we meant to catch up.

What's good about this as well for anyone who else wants to participate in shun by a russle is we're now getting in the level of Shunning you need. For sure. Well, that's the thing. So some people would go, well, that's enough, but are you saying that I'm going to be completely open and honest here? The guy was hurt. Yeah. Because I really like Russell. You didn't feel shunned yet.

I was beginning to feel shunned, but I was like, it's just not like him. And he's been, and his friends were so, like he's communicating with Zoe like professionally and through her business, go to him stuff's like, okay, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna harp on too much about this. And then I went, you know what, whither is Slack? He's giving me the wrong number. So we're like, he said, hey mate, this would have been like maybe a week after

I didn't hear back from Russell. So still about a year ago. You really like catch your mouth. I was like, I was bugging him. I was like, why is it Russell? I had a cruff written back. I like it's a lot worse. I mean, he's fun, but like it gets worse. It gets worse.

So let's not before we let the booty and I'm fearing my heart here. It's like a whip up. Send me Russell. You've sent me the wrong number. Whip goes, no, I haven't. This is his number. Send me a screenshot of their most recent chat, you know, they've chat with them within the last couple months or something. So it's, it's a recent number. We've got, no, I haven't. This is his number. It sends me a screenshot of their most recent chat, you know, they've chatted within the last couple of months or something.

So it's, it's a recent number. They go, fair enough, he didn't want a chat. I get it. We move on. Fast forward to the end of last year, December. Someone recommends to me, oh, have you watched this documentary on the ABC? There's a great, it's called Australia, how Australia got its mojo, a documentary about advertising in the 80s and 90s, host of my Russell Howcraft.

We made by Russell. I watched the docko, great docko. I'm in the moment I go, I'm gonna go again. I'm gonna go again. I think, it's a very well made docko. I think I'll just go again. I went, you know what, so much water's passed under the bridge now. I actually think I'll just go again. I went, you know what, so much water's passed under the bridge.

I said, I actually think it was the wrong number. I message, so I message Sam, our producer, who works with Russell, I think, on his podcast, I go, mate, do you have Russell hair across the phone? You're really, really, really, I think it's, you never, this persistent about anything. Anything, but I wanted to tell Russell

that he did a great job in this time. Sam sends me through the contact, and I go, great, now I've got it. Maybe he's detected how eager you are back from one message. But you know when girls used to not reply to you back in the day, like this is kind of changed the game. I'm just saying. I'm so lucky.

I get one. So Sam sends me through the business card. I go, great, this is actually Russell, how across number. I said, hey, I just saw that doco. Awesome, well done. Just wanted to say that. I hear nothing back. I go, hey, I just saw that dock. Awesome. Well done. Just want to say that. I hear nothing back. I go, I check the numbers. They're the same number. Right. It's the same number. I thought Sam sent me an updated number. It's actually still the same number. The older but I'm beginning to realize that he's Rosalie. I've crossed number. It's now

zero from two and that's where I've just let it go. But it's been on my mind over some ago because now unfortunately I sent that number. I was telling this story behind the scenes of Lego and the wardrobe makeup people were like, having a girl with me, going, he doesn't want to talk to you. So now unfortunately, every time I see those people there,

like, have you caught up with Russell Halcroft? And I have to like again, I wish I had a girl. It's good, we're all connected. Here's the thing, Andy. Do we continue the... So first of all, if you've been chanted by a Russell, I know how you feel. Yep.

And the first thing you would admire, that's the most painful part about this. Can I... Can I... Do you have these number? I think I've got these number, yes, because we're... Just something we're occasionally gazing at. We're gazing at playing golf together. Right, well, that's what I've got.

I've got the... What is it ending? Your one. Hang on. But let's, he's what I'd like to put forward as I get before. Well, I want to try and call him. Oh, great idea. So if he's answering your private number and he's not responding to the alien, that's great idea.

Stand by. But I also wanted to put this out before we get to the number. Is I want to apologize to you, Ham, for giggling. And Jack. I think you should do the same because I think it's a bad precedent Oh, yeah people won't nominate for people that want to come in for Sean by Russell Well, I appreciate that I want to correct I think I think our stance wanted to laugh at me But also in then whitewash it after the event Well, I just want to make sure that Yeah, everybody comes

forward with their council worries. What is yours ending? Because if we've got the same room, I'm just calling right now with my phone and putting him on speaker. It was showing me again, but we might as well have the third one live. 545 here, isn't it? Yeah, that's the number. That's what everyone's given me.

Beginning to, there's no, the competing fear that I had the wrong number. I have to let go of this. Yeah. Don't, we're just going to call him. This is great. Please be just kidding. Okay, so work another.

Hi Dad, you're called Russell and Halcroft. Please send me a text as I do find I can respond to. Oh! It sounded like you got donated as well. It did sound like you went to message bank really quickly. Well, these literally says I prefer text. I'm wonderful on text message if I have even a scrap of respect for you. I will respond to your text message. Well, this is not on and that lets us practice what we...

That says what we're saying. If someone else joins a segment shown by Russell, what's the best way for us to respond to you now, Ham? Well, I mean, I guess it's just a safe space. Play some piano music and just go, Hey man, we're here. There are other people out there. There are the people that are the last thing you wanted to be recommended

and another Russell. Yeah, exactly. There's other people that are the last thing you wanted to be recommended another Russell. Yeah, exactly. There's other people's other names. Like if I was like, I'm feeling down, I'm gonna call Russell Brand. He's shutting me through the last thing he needs to be to be the two of Russell. Yeah, so I think we'll just practice here, Jacko.

Hey, hey, don't worry about him. Don't worry about it. There's plenty of other guys out and girls out there with different names. And like, they start with completely different letters as well, so you won't even remember your mind or your Russell. You can take some million people and they'll text back. Yeah. No pressure.

No. It's my mind's racing with what's going on. Could someone have... No, I did. I was going to say, could someone have got into his phone and changed my number to something bad? That could have happened. That's why.

I think this is the part where we, Jack F. too, really... You have to believe in the theory I try there? Now your job as friends to help me get over this issue. Just go, actually that's what happened. That's what's happened. Yeah, someone's accidentally put in his phone as don't pick up or something. Yeah.

I mean, it's a number that was closed. Yeah, yeah. So don't worry about that. Yep, you're right. Telemarker. He's probably going in there as telemarker as I say. Yeah. How would we get to him to change that? How do you feel? A bit better or? Yeah, I'm just a second. Actually, you're dragging this on, hoping that in the next few seconds,

he sends me text going, sorry, I couldn't talk. Sorry, I couldn't talk, man. I mean, in the middle of something I do want to talk to you. I've been meaning to catch up. No, no. That's a hat trick of shuns. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, a little bit of business. We obviously are wearing white shirts or t-shirts at the moment because we're hoping for a new

track suit to come for a new show track suit for 2021. We're still blankies. We got a email from SportsCraft saying that they are the official uniform provider of the Australian Olympic team. Would I have seen a SportsCraft shop at a mall or am I thinking of a limb craft? No, you can. And SportsCraft. Yeah, so I thought that's what I was thinking.

I was like, I don't think I've seen the shop. Am I thinking of a cross between SportsC girl and limb craft? I'm thinking sports Girl I'm thinking sports girl was it sports but it sports craft is it sports girl won't be making me official of in big Universe Nothing gets sports craft but Sportscraft it sports girls not known for its elite sports wear Jacko Have we seen sports cry they are in Westfields and Mires and stuff. And the craft.

And this is the logo. It's pretty much just text. It's just text sports craft. Maybe they're new. Well, they don't need to show off because they are obviously very good at what they do. The most surprising thing is from the window shopping, it's not a lot of sportingwear.

Right. It's more to the casual casual wear. And they got the gig. They've got the gig for the Olympic tracksuits. Well, he's, he's what a, so we went back to him and said, we want official Olympic tracksuits, please to wear on the show. We did say that didn't we? And I think we asked for a accreditation. Yeah. They came back and said, might be able to do that, but there's an embargo on that till May 18. So that's something we're going to kind of like do. We can guess what it is. We could guess and beat

them to the punch. And I think the one of the obvious things is, you know, putting into it together, they obviously listen to the show. They would have been aware of your a whole lot more chickens hat. The big, the big foam roast chook. So you sort of imagine either it's either going to be the harbour bridge on someone's head, like, you know, big, like those would be the hats. That sort of like, well, we know that the harbour bridge would be the hats. What will the go on. That's the topic. He's where there was a bit of loss in communication. I was like, okay, we can work with that.

And then they said, great, so how do you like the blaze at a look? They mean the, they mean the, they mean the, they're not doing the tracksuit. So it's for sport, they're doing the opening ceremony arrival outfit, which still will have that Of course, which is the obvious thing, but they're doing a blazer and slacks and a poll Not doing that. And so they said but you guys could like were a country club You guys can still do the podcast in a blazer and polar like no, no, no, it's really just a really cool. I'm going to meet the president after winning the soon of all.

Yeah, it's only meant because so it's meant to be just relaxed. We're just trying to make the most comfortable outfit. That's why we do tracks. That's what we do tracks. That's what we do completely relax. So I had to say this sports craft. Good luck. Yeah.

I gave them a wink with regards to the Sydney Aberha. I said, you know, can't tell me, but I think we all the good small replica, all the roofs dangling off instead of the courts. He's a nice touch. Yes. They then said, look, Asics are the actually the track suit sponsor. That makes more sense, does it? Because I was like, why did a sports craft? The sort of one or two location mall shop get it over

one of the big sporting companies. Like, again, I'm greatly admire sports craft, but now knowing a bit more about the story, I think that would be the first to admit. Yes, we're not trying to beat Nike or Rascals. No, you know another kind of... If you know what America, who will be Nike? You know, who makes your tracks?

Sportscraft. You mean, lean craft? No, common mistake. Not sportsgirl either. Not a huge player in the sporting world field. First go at it, actually, you just thought we'd, you know, COVID and stuff, give a local business a shot. So we thank and respect sports craft.

Thank you for coming forward. But maximum. Yeah, it remains open of enevacic listening. Right. Right. OK, that is something that we would look at the style and see whether it's right for us. Just to all other tracksuits that thought that sports craft had this, they don't sign up. They don't have the Hamish and Andy show.

They do have the opening ceremony arrival for the Australian Olympic team. Which is equally huge. A huge grad. A huge get. A huge get to sports craft. Because all eyeballs will be on the team for that. And it's probably better than the tracksuit. Yeah.

Because a lot of the athletes, like, let's be honest, podium time. Yeah. You're not running in the tracksuit jumper ever. You're not really participating in it. It's only during podiums. You'd have to say of all the brands, Speedo probably gets the most exposure because you know, we do, we do meddle heavily in the pool. I'm happy about that.

And you do get the tracksuit on the podium, but it's really the warm up stuff. Yep. Really whoever's on the, yeah, whoever's on the baters and you'd get the tracksuit on the podium, but it's really the warm up stuff. Yeah. Really whoever's on the, whoever's on the baters, and you'd assume it's speedo and, or I don't know, that's whatever. They're probably the winners out of the Olympics, aren't they? I would say so. Any interesting, or we're not doing it in speedos, we're just saying, you know,

that's just a side lecture, I guess, on some fun marketing tidbits.