Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2021 Ep 125

Episode Date: March 31, 2021

1. Wee mask 2. Pino investigation 3. Hamish’s boat license 4. Blanked by a Blake 5. Loyalty card lottery 

A list-nuff production. Activate your internet. Cos the Hamish and the Podcast starts in three, two. Sorry, still buffering. One. Ahoy, you, Han. Oh, hi sir. And it's, when this drops, it'll be the first of the month.

So no doubt, you're dad will be texting you. Can you let it, let it still does it? Still does it. Still does it every. Have you got him? Yeah, occasionally overseas, time difference. I think I've got him long range from New Zealand before, which is really the only country you can go to that is earlier. Yes. Time difference. I think I've got him long range from New Zealand before, which is really the only country you can go to that is earlier. Time difference. My dad, Jack loves doing, I don't know if we've...

We discussed this on the podcast. What does he do, pinching and punch for the first of the most? Dad, he's a very low volume textur. I think he fits well into the days of paying per text. Yep. But, you know, so I think he still thinks it's 30 cents a text or whatever. It's 60 carriages or whatever it was. Yeah, it was drawn anarily low volume text. But he will absolutely get you with the pinch and the punch. And then sort of almost like a Batman villain

will often put my lovelies at the end. So it's like quite an evil, to be like, pinch and a punch, my lovelies. Yeah. And it's just not a term he uses for the kids ever About it is when he's a villain I decided to weigh you know pinched and punched in via text of the day You work a sleeping giant and I got this the most dismissive didn't know you're involved would have got you ages ago And 30 days later at 12 o'01 AM, he would have got me.

You would have got just King Pinch and Haymaker. My lovely. What are you two, Jacko? Ohoy and Ohoy. To Ryan, who I believe is in Melbourne. Ohoy boys, it's Ryan here from Melbourne, Australia. And I just wanted to say, it was not that hard to upload the audio file. I have been using it to the podcast over the last month now,

and I think I've listened to every episode in the shortest amount of time. Loving all of the work and loving Jack most. Cheers boys! Oh wait! I can't see anything for the right show. This thing's ever set up. I feel like it's like Jack and Andy when what if we hired a guy to do one of these messages? We'll go halves and I mean Andy's like,

we need to say something about the far sub-loader which I'd say why then I need to be the favorite. Well it was originally me but it was five hundred dollars. I couldn't afford it so I needed someone to split it with. To outside. Ryan thank you very much. Thank you for the ride. I am in inverted quotation marks.

But we do recommend people going back to the start of the podcast, get on board. Do you message, set it loading, set, you know, have higher summer, maybe go to air to ask for something, get someone to come over your house and start going through the motion of opening the drop bars and all that stuff, and then start listening to the back catalog, and then finish it together in a beautiful union. Hey, can I cast our minds back to summer? Actually, just as I said that before, a scandal over summer or something that I forgot to bring up and I was like,

I'll wait for the podcast. Two scandals occurred over summer. Now, or two things that I would either of them be daggling male worth. Yeah, we could get clicked better at this. The one involving you could, for sure. Yeah. There's also another one involving my mum. This is more of an internal family scandal

Okay, I just popped back into it, but I was like geez wonderful family scandals, you know off the back of the raw family family Okay, well, let's see if they bite at this one so you get a sit down with Oprah for this Yeah, but I'm gonna spill it all now. Okay, so she what if it's Hamish Blake re-spelling Hey, which like re-spilled, that already makes. Over summer, I stayed with mum for about a week. I could be a horde with mum. And the family had to move into state, and I was hiding, holding back,

held back in the future. We had to finish Lego. I was shooting Lego masters. I couldn't do the New South Wales move, but I was hanging out with mum, I had a lovely week mum. And it became a daily ritual to do the crossword and use paper.

Big K-Bos, eag on the crossword. And it was great, something we bonded over. Mum was very good at the crossword. She's a literature teacher, she knows a lot of stuff and she's very pro at the crossword, like you know counting on her fingers, maps it out, now she's just got all the moves at the crossword.

I wanted to contribute to the team. I probably, you know, I had to have good days and bad. I was probably kind of have two bad days. You want to get in early across a... When someone comes to you and goes, I've been doing the cross-er for an hour and eat these last ones. You're like, oh, you're pretty good at the cross-er. You know, I'm like, oh, you're pretty good at the cross-er. You know, I can finish it before we take off. I'm like, oh, you're pretty good at the cross-er.

I'm like, oh, you're pretty good at the cross-er. I'm like, oh, you're pretty good at the cross-roading, he goes, normally I can finish it before we take off. Yeah. Cut to us taking off, and he's four, five words down, and he's got a lot to go. Oh, he's a lot to go. He's a lot to go. Yeah.

So I see a huge long word across the top. It's higher education certificate, right? And I look at whatever amount of words it is, and I can't remember fingers, bachelor's degree, fits. Well, here we go, Mum, or after all, absolute fly. They give us ten clues for the rest of the crossword. We progress on things aren't working. And the elephant in the room becomes, oh my God, what if bachelor's degree? I mean, it has to fit. It's the exact amount of letters. And it's so big. It was secondary school.

And there was so much, it's in pen and you would hate it. Andy does not like this. So much writing over, recapitalizing. Go on, go on, buy your newspaper. And I could see my mum does not like that either. And she, the next day, when we opened up the crossword, the pen was lying there on the table, and Mum reached over and just quietly shook the pen.

And she was the scrawl. She was the scrawl of the wrist. I lost my pen for it, just because I jumped into it really, but that was great. So that was scan number one. That's good. Probably just worth it, I don't know.

I just don't know. I don't know if I was going for this. Yeah. Issue number two across summer. This was earlier. I just totally forgot it at this end of the if I was going for this. Yeah. Issue number two across summer. This was earlier. I just totally forgot at this until the other day where I picked up a face mask. I went, I never told anywhere this. I, you and I were on our way to the podcast team drinks.

Remember this? We were going from your place. We were walking to the team drinks, jumped on the train. Yep. And as we were going to the train. Very in touch for the comment. Very in touch. Super in touch.

Going to the train went, oh, don't have a mask. You said You said, I don't know what I said. I got to spare one. Looking in my back pocket. Got to spare one for the train. Happy days. Took the train. We're all good. I poured my mask that I wore out of my pocket, pulled yours out of my back pocket. I forgot, but a few days prior to that, the reason I had a mask in my pocket was I had been in the Botanic Gardens with a few mates versus in Melbourne, and we're not going to have like a kid's birthday party, and my daughter who's three, you know, you never know when they need to, we should do a tree week. Now, tree weeks for girls are different to tree weeks for boys. When you're in the tree, there's a lot of angles and holding the legs and the angles and stuff.

Just a different angle on a little girl. And that's all fine, but you need something to clean up with afterwards. I would have used the mask and just popped it back in my pocket because you're in the bushes of the Botanic Gardens. They're gonna live. I don't know who got what.

One of this got a tree. There's a 50-50, you had a We mask. If you didn't smell anything on the day, you probably didn't get the We mask, but it's worth noting. No thing. It's worth noting that there's a chance that you got the We mask.

Even knowing that it was a chance. You know what I mean? Yeah, I know. It can't be happening. It's the same thing as if I said, you know, one person's come back positive for COVID in the group. We're still waiting results, you're like, I'm sorry. You know, it came to me. It's the same thing as if I said to you, one person's come back positive for COVID in the group. We're still waiting results, you're like,

I'm sorry. You know, it's probably because there is no thought about it because the next day I was like, gee, that was, it was a rare moment between the two of us where I had taken a fresh mask on the left of the house, walked over to yours. And then you're like, oh no, I don't have a mask. And I've got a spare.

It was incredible. I was afraid in my mind going, that was so odd that moment because it was like, I was super prepared, and Andy wasn't, and that never happens. And then I went, why was I prepared? I think I know what that mask was doing in there. That was the freeway mask. So you got a 50-50.

It's not a big deal, I should tell you. I've had that young ladies. Yeah. And you said, I've been absolutely saturated in that for years. I mean, you know, when she was in Nappy's, she'd come into the bed and jump, but she'd just wear a Nappy, you know, big fall after a night in bed. Climb over my face, just drag a hot bag of piss over my face. And that was just every morning for like months.

And you know, you know, that I am her dad and that's and it's my privilege to have that hot bag of pierced drag across my face. You and I signed up for all of that. No, I didn't start off. I do apologize if you didn't get the bad mask. You and I have probably been in worse situations on our travel shows, except for stuff that have been. Have we ever paid on each other?

No, but you are. No, just accidentally. Oh, yes. You owed me one. Do you like? You owed me one because on our caravan of courage, our caravan trip, we were broadcasting all the way through. We're going up through the Adelaide wine district and Hamish was saying how goodies at wines he knows. That's right, you may be trying to go at piss. how good he is at wines, he knows. That's right, you may be doing goat piss.

Well, I, Hamish was just going to sip different wines and tell us the price, right? And so I did one, which was just full of goat's piss. And Ham went, this is the best wine and then she tried and she'll have in front of the whole crowd scald the whole thing. And I was horrified. I was petrified and horrified.

And that's a goat's piss. That is dirty, then a toddler. So it's very sterile. So yeah, I think we've got vision of the way we try to track down and post on the pipes. But yeah, you owe me one. So yeah. If I can find a picture of us from that day, I don't think we dig a photo of us in the mask, but maybe we can find one in zoom in

to see if there's any stains anywhere in the house. But anyway, yeah, so I guess I do know you one. So one or? But all. Just. BELL RINGS OK, gentlemen, and email has fallen to my side of the fence that raises a question mark over a beloved

segment of the show. So we haven't done yet this year, but we certainly plan to have hats made. Oh, pizza lotto. Pizza lotto. It's, we do have hats this year. We have a winner, pizza lotto winner hats. If you knew to the show, welcome. Welcome.

Welcome. My all means pizza. Pizza, pizza lot is where hats. If you knew to the show, welcome. Welcome. I all mean pizza. It's not as well We call Peno's pizza Zio Peno's in Sydney and Peno answers and we we go hey, is there a pizza in the upper is there a pizza no one he says yes Took a lot of establishes with Peno. Yeah, cuz he didn't tell you part of the game Yeah, don't tell the don't tell us the pizza Callers guess what could be the next pizza out. If you get it right, you have one pizza lotto. We've had one winner.

I think we've only ever had one. We now have hats this year. When we have time, we reintroduce pizza lotto on the show. You can either get a pizza lot of participant hats, which is black and white, or a pizza lotto winner hat that we got printed in color. We played it at the podcast in a year party in Jezza, one a piece of a lot of winner hat that we got printed in color. We played it at the podcast, and you're part in Jez'a. Jez'a won a hat.

The rest of us will participate. He's the only one with a color hat. Now, if you two would like to experience that thrill, stay tuned. A piece of a lot of more return. Before it returns, conspiracy must be addressed. This was bought to the shows attention by a Lert listener, Nathan, towards the end of podcast episode 96.

We rang, we rang Zio Peno's. I've got the audio here, good to go up here. And Nathan said, something court easier. So look, I need you guys to go back and listen, specifically to the initial answering of the phone by Peno. He's usually highly authentic Italian accent is nowhere to be found. But he's native, like a accent. Instead, you're typical Aussie, how are you going? All right. Then straight back into his, quote, normal Italian accent, once you identify yourselves.

Nathan suggests, could Pino be putting it on for the listeners? Add extra authentic Italian-ness to Z could Pino be putting it on for the listeners? Add extra authentic Italian-ness to Zio Pino's. Well, maybe he's putting it on not just for us, but for the customers, because with the very first time we rang him, he had it, or is it the first time? Maybe Nathan's suggesting it's boosted on the phone

to give you a more authentic feel that you're talking to a real zero, Uncle Pino. He said, look, oh, zero. Yeah, zero, aren't he zero, Uncle? So it's Uncle Pino. Uncle Pino is. I'm late. Something just isn't adding up.

Okay. Says Nathan. I will get to the bottom of this. Oh. Says Nathan. Nathan Nathan. And there's okay. well, let's try. He, I've got the audio that he speaks of.

So the claim is the how you're going all right. He's not in, he knows, normal attain access. Oh, he's saying, hey, how are you? Hello, it's Fina. Oh, Fina, how are you, sir? Hey, how you going? It's H&D. Hey, how are you?

You're good. You never take a Hey, how are you? It's Amish and Andy. Hey, how are you? You're good. You never take a Tuesday after you. You are. Never. Well, before you had nine, nine to mom and nine to mom and now it's bad. No in the moment. At the end, it's the English has become quite broken.

It's a fear. It's a start of that again. Hello, it's been on. Oh, hey, how are you, sir? Hey, how are you, sir? It's Amish and Andy. Hey, it's Vinah. Oh, Peno. How are you, sir? Hey, how you going? It's Amishan Andy. Hey, how are you? You're good.

There is some gear change. Wow. It's subtle. Yeah. And in Peno's defense, it could just be enthusiasm. It's exciting because we don't say it's Hamishan Andy first. We just say, hi, Peno. And he goes, yeah, how you going?

All right. Then we say it's Hamishan Andy. Now, just say hi, Pino. And he goes, yeah, how you going, all right? Then we say it's Hamish and Andy. Now I'm not saying he's excited by us, but he loves the game. So he's infusious and may bring on the accent harder. I get mides, I'm just trying to see a cultural background check as heavy as Centalic Bordent's wife, actually, when they all went. Illaria.

This is Australia's Ilaria Baldwin. Hillary Baldwin from Boston. So, Hayne, is Nathan here? We have Nathan up. What are we proposing? Well, I really just got Nathan up because I wanted to thank him for his investigative work and to get his take on things. Some people will thank him, some people won't, because it changes.

You don't know. Hey, Nathan, have you thought more about this? Well, I'm happy they're standing. Oh, what are you? Are you leveling the accusation at Peno that he can dial up and dial down his level of Italian authenticity? I suppose that is one of my accusations.

How do you feel about, if Peno is putting on an accent, how do you feel about, if Pino is putting on an accent, how do you feel about that? I feel a bit lied to you. Obviously we all love Pete a lot, and I feel he knows obviously he's part of it. I'm right on the fence, I don't deny that there are different tones in the voice, but it would be like if your host leaves you a favorite favorite game show like the regular host like it would be hard to replace him. Yeah. We'll afford to lot of different hosts on baby John Burgers.

Yeah. Most then Steve I would love it. Steve I'm care friend of ours. Yeah. But you would he would admit he said he said to us. He's like, no, baby John. You know, and he said that he stopped a 27 year franchise. He ended on his watch.

So he's the thing. He said, you know, Pino, what we're imagining when we think of Zio Pino is huge, you know, an authentic Italian man. And myself as a one eighth Italian man, I guess I'd begin to think of him as my uncle, a little bit, as time had gone on. But if we, but there's no doubt

that there's a slight tonal difference. Here's the thing, Andy. I live in Sydney now. I don't know where Zee of Paners is. I know it's within driving distance. Is it me? One option we've got is I drive out. I'd love to. Undercover. If you're willing to. Yeah. Undercover. One night. And I sit in the back with a newspaper or something. And I just observe. He's demeanor, pre-phone call, and post-phone call. Great idea. And because I hope to clear him.

Yeah, I have to go, we all want that. I have to go that the, that's not the, when you hear him saying, hey, you're gone all right, he's just, he's distracted. That's, you know, he's obviously in Australia as well. He lives in Australia, he's an Italian accent to Australian man. So he's dipping in and out of accents. Yeah.

This is not, you're going out there to exonerate. A hundred percent. Not prosecute. I love it. I love Zeta Pena. Look Nathan, thank you for bringing it to our tension. We need the alert listness. HamishNanny.com if you ever have any queries about any pun we call.

Yeah. Any basis conspiracy theories? We are your guys. And thanks to you, Hames. Sure. For taking the front seat on this one. Absolutely. I've also got a bit of a hectic week.

It may not be this week. Oh, look, we can expect this by mid-year. Investigation absolutely pending. And in the meantime, I think he's absolutely innocent until proven guilty. I'll go out and do the accent check live in costume. The good news for you on this one is there's probably a pizza at the end of it, which will get an extra incentive where the big finishes and the big charts that you've promised to our shows from time to time,

more required just work with no pizza. Now that you've mentioned the pizza, I may have a small window opening up tonight. LAUGHTER The justic was. MUSIC And I received something exciting in the mail, I'm sorry. How odd have it stay hard, I suppose.

I've been, have been talking to Andy. Yeah. I mean, you've been part of the show for a long time, Jake, but I guess guys, guys. I'm not offended. You can address Andy if you wish. Great. Go for a walk. I'm not offended.

I'm not offended. I'm not offended. You can address Andy if you wish. Great. Go for a walk. Go for a walk. Go for a walk. Go for a walk.

Go for a walk. Go for a walk. Go for a walk. Go for a walk. Go for a walk. Go for a walk. Go for a walk. That's right here. Yeah. I never see anything like anything. I use it through all my mail out without opening it. I remember back in the day when I came in. I was waiting for this thing. Game round to your house one day when you and a share house. In back when we did the radio, at a 10.50 years ago.

And there was a pile of mail that if like in a hoarder's house or if you know, if it's safe like on CSI they go and investigate someone's house and they open the door and there's a big pile of mall like oh, he hasn't lived here for like 10 months. Yeah. Hamish's pile was still bigger. And I said, when are you gonna go through that? And you pulled out the bin, you swept it all into the bin

and said, it's better off starting afresh. If they want me, they'll find me. They'll get me. And it was all the final load of stuff. It was a horrifying on notice star one of the ones. I will have actually notice But at the running joke in that house house house that rane joker that house became I made where do you want your mail and I'd say pop it in the archive Just pretending it wasn't ongoing archive. And should I need anything I could dip into the archive to find it? To me, that was more audacious. Still do it.

Then when we, the other male related, this one's electronic, but the other male related situation with Hame, was when you logged back on to the work emails for the first time in four or five years. And there was 12,000. After a Christmas break, not four or five years. There was 12,000. After a Christmas break, not four or five years. There was all, there was 12,000. There was a lot.

There was a thousand. There wasn't a thousand. There wasn't after a Christmas break. We just had you and I had been both locked out of the SCA emails. Oh, that's right. We both did go back into them for ages. Then I went back in and tried to do a bit of cleaning up. You just let it ride.

I looked and said, okay, yeah, there were a few thousand emails and I, I instigated the policy of going, I'm going to just like quickly on the mouse wheel, scroll down at random, hit five. It was like paying the pokes, we sort of just scroll down and then just stop and then pass all these bolded subject lines, hit stop, look at one. If any of the five were personally addressed to me and only me and relevant to me. I would open all 5,000 or whatever. But if none were, they all got deleted.

Surprise, surprise. They're all group halls. Yeah, Kathy's birthday this weekend. Can you not leave you cutlery? No, I just remind that the intranet hub logon is now located in the top left hand corner. And then, hey, went the master lead. Burn them all. Burn them all, burn it down.

Start again. And it, not a single time in my life, when did anyone go, but I sent you the email. It's just, they were relevant. Nigerian princes, you could have had a million dollars, if you just given them the, your bank details. Oh, well, you do win some of those. I said the thing that came in the mouth the other day, I was excited to get because I was

expecting this thing. It was my boat license. Oh, okay. Jeff's got a new photo for that. You know, they can use you, they can use your license photo because it's through the same people, right? But interesting you ask, I was excited to get this boat license. And what I was doing was you just, I get I was doing was, I get a lot of mail,

everyone does a guess from like, you know, GPO box in the middle of the city. You know who it's from? But I was like, one of these has got a license in them. Now I usually throw a lot of my mail out. I was checking the recycling, but I was like, bending each envelope till I filled something stick in there like a cart.

Because I was like, the boat license's got to be coming. But I'm not opening all this stuff, you know. But I hit the jackpot the other night, and it went great, it's finally here. Opened it up. And interesting you mentioned the photo because I look wonderful in the photo. Right, but there's a reason I look wonderful.

I remembered when I got the boat license, it was last the, actually early start of this year, right? It's in January. And did they use an old photo or a new photo? They use a new photo, but you had to do it. This is in Melbourne. You had to, like, I did do a course online. Then you get a certificate that you have to take in just because the rules are, it's not allowed to be easy. So they give you a certificate, you have to take in. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's like, you're under the government act of this cannot be convenient or easy. In any way, go in, make an appointment online at an inconvenient time for you, then go

to Carlton to the main hub. You're allowed to go to one of the others, get your ticket, line up outside because of COVID, go inside, be at the wrong window, go upstairs, be at the right window. Line up again to pay up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't, don't, don't give everyone enough lost terminal. That would be too convenient. Go to a separate spot to pay. Sorry, I do all this. And only day, it's scheduled for filming Lego masters, right? So, and Lego masters is shot in North Melbourne. Right. And I was like, I can do this in my lunch break. I can get off set, and I'm not

that required. I mean, no one noticed, I sometimes have a nap, so no one notices if I'm half an hour late, but they said, so I go, I think I can make it in the lunch break. So I drive over during the lunch break on Lego masters, go inside, do all this stuff. Give them the details and stuff and they go, okay, great. We can get you out of here. We can just use your photo from your driver's license. And they went, then I realized though, I'm in full hair and makeup because I've been on set. I'm in professional television, like, makeup. I look 10 years younger, my hair is perfect. And I said, so you can use the license first, but can you take a new one? Because what you can, better mean, you don't need to. I think I'd like to. I think I'd like to. Oh, right,

okay. Like, there's no one. It says yes. Can I hang around longer and do the final? And so there was a little bit of confusion of like, yeah, yeah, well, if you really want to go over here, and then I was talking to the lady and I said, is it like a passport when you can't smile? And she went, oh, you're not meant to smile. Let me give it a little bit of a, just a little bit of a, just a little bit of a, just a little bit of a, not a dang app. You're not ending with a perfect photo. I will put up on, it looks unbelievable. No black bags under the eye because they're all, because the only thing is a...

Is this the guy that put this stuff? Have you got it on? I will. Yeah, yeah. Have a look at this. It looks like... Actually, it's like I've been in one of those sticky machines you're going in Japan

with a... Put a filter on your face. It's unbelievable. It's well done. And the only thing that was a bit of a concern is, because TV makeup has like a reflective bounce in it. Yes. You never get flash photography for TV makeup.

So do you ever slide? I was worried because when they show you the preview on the photo, remember there was like a bounce from under my eye. It's like bright white from where they put makeup on the bags. That hasn't turned out. No, I think they dealt with it. I think they've smoothed it out or it doesn't print.

It's just blowing the whole thing out. I'm going to go back in and get mine. Maybe you should. When you're filming something next, book your appointment because it's just... That would be me now forever. I'll be 65 going. Use the one from 2021.

Use the one from 2021. Hey, last week you launched the segment. What's it called? Shand by a rust. Shand by a rustle. Sorry. I'm remembering the intro. In fact, we should play the intro. Play the intro.

In fact, we should play the intro. Yeah. Yeah. Not trying to complain to one of cause of us, but you have been shunned by a rustle. And you got shunned by... Well, I opened the segment up to say anyone in their life if they feel that they might have been shunned by a rustle, be they well known or civilian, you can come to the show. We'll try and get to the bottom of it. Well, obviously, as we found out, I'll obviously lend a compassionate shoulder for you to

reveal why Russell Shunju and how Russell Shunju are kicked off the segment by telling the going through the history of the two text messages I've sent in the last year to Russell Howe, Croft. Yes, of course. Of course, it's quite fun. Breakfast radio on Melbourne. Number one, breakfast show. Do I know? I'm sorry, gets just to say.

I don't know. I am an FM radio to me. It's like radio on TV. It's two whole different mediums. No, it's like the genus, the species, the phylum. Like all of radio, he's the king of. Yeah. For your specific species of radio, FM,

you are the king of that ecosystem. Yeah, specifically a winner. Which is special. Special winner. Which is kind. Yeah, which is special. Special winner. Which is kind of like five is the final. The same way as being the king of Nero, isn't as great as the king of the world. No. You would be under the king of the world.

But to Neroviens. Oh yeah. All hail the king. Anyway, so that's us. No one's come forward. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no resolved Russell Shunnings. And so this would be good news for all those people that were uncertain about emailing in because Russell Halcroft did hear the segment last week on the podcast and he joins us now at home. Do you want the opportunity to say these words? Hello, because you were so keen to catch up with him by the sound of it.

Well, one of my texts was a catch-up enthusiasm. The other one was simply, and contained no catch-up base, just wanted to congratulate a man on a job or done for the documentary he made. Both messages went green. I thought there must be a problem with the phones. I've since Cross Reference's number. It is the correct number. I called him on the show last week. He went straight to message bank from my phone, which is, you know, is correct Russell.

And in fact, Russell's message, as we all heard, is something along the lines of, I've hung up on you because I only do text message and I love doing text messages. So, Russell, well, been so for years. Oh, come on, Russell, be willing to buy it. It's great to hear your voice. I'm so excited to buy those. It's great to hear you, boys. I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I've got to say, I She did miss out I think a fairly important point in the flight back from LA to

Melbourne story One of us was upgraded Oh, it was him who you upgraded we was I upgraded You were upgraded I feel like I would have remembered that Yeah, I know so I was shunned so I was at a class thing so we were friends in LA We were on the same level. But then once you got closer to the nose of the plane, you began to change your friendship group.

Yeah, that's a fair. I've moved on, I've moved on. So I'm sure Kate Middleton changed a few of her friends when she entered the Royal Family. It's a class thing, yeah. Yeah, you got it. So I'm, so I only shop 10 andy's, some exhibits. Oh, yep, just coming through now I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm. Yes. So you will notice, maybe,

fake out via Blake, what about me? What about me? Wanked via Blake. So, yes, the first text we had, we had a nice little text after I had my little nice pointy end flight. And we discussed having a bit of, having a pizza over at my place while, yeah. We did?

Yeah, now I sent you a text on Thursday, February the 20th. And I thought, you know what, I'm going to have to, I'm going to have to sort of say to Hamish, look, I've got some other friends coming over. So Max Gorn, who of course is known to both you and I said, look, I've got Max coming over, Thomas Donaldson. Like D's. Some Melbourne football club players, which we have will be so thrilled with this. This goes 21 days after our didn't get a chance to say goodbye at baggage claim, but let's catch up soon. And you're following through.

He also in the Andy, I'm sending Andy my script. Oh, okay, he's saying, I've got friends coming up, so don't come over. Sorry, I wouldn't fight over, but we don't have any more cheers. No, he does. I'm reading it here, him. He will be mentioned. I've never received it. Tom McDonald, and he says, Sunnay night, the air place, if you and so, plus kids,

if that's good for you, would like to come over. You're very, you're very, very welcome. Extremely low key. Well, I make the pizzas. It's exceptional on you. So, and also he has Russell according to his Dossier has replied to your initial text messages well. Thank you. Andy, I sent you the screenshot from my phone. Russell, am I messages going blue to you? Because they're going green to me, mate. Are you on iPhone or you Samsung?

No, I'm Google. That actually could be what's going on because I'm sending you what I've got a mind and it's nothing. It is there. And then it makes sense. So first day February the 20th, I sent you a text, nothing back from you regarding telling over. Of course. Then some day I sent you another one.

I'm deep in what I now refer to as my cold year. Thinking that this is a year of being cold shoulder. Yeah, let me know if I need to make extra batch of pizza dough. No reply. So, yeah, so at this point, Russell, I just talk us through what you're feeling. I mean, imagine you'd be feeling extremely shocked by how fast the tables are turning here. Right, right. At this point I thought, you know, hey, Michelin, I thought we were... That's what we were both operating off. That's like none of this has made sense to be russling the fuck.

Look, I get it. If I was me, you know, if I was 18 and it's a girl I met at an eye club, of course I would be 2K, but the chemistry seems to be undeniable. That's what's had me questioning. And then going on. And according to Russell Ham, he gets a message from you just wondering if you're still in the building because though I would like a photo with him. Oh, that's true. Yeah, that's true.

And so after you're not replying to him, he didn't reply to that either. Well, he does, but according to him, but after all this non-replies and the pizza, you just ask him a favor. For your wife. I've never got, obviously, never got the pizza here. I know that I'm just interested in.

And then, so from my self-respective, okay, you think I'm a guy that cares, doesn't care about pizzas. Because my wife, in your business podcast, had a great time, we came in to do our podcast, she was hanging around with us, and she's like, oh, I forgot to do a photo with Russell,

sent you that message. You didn't write back, and I was like, oh, you know, you can only see this to me. You're up in the middle of it. I said, a little sad face emoji. Then you sent me a text regarding Mojo, as you've referred to. I immediately sent you a back of text saying,

Tuesday, Jan, the 12th, what does that say? Oh my. Yep. So you're a champ. You're a champ. Yeah. You're a champ. So suddenly, I mean, what is happening between you two, though? My phone gets none of your messages. That's why I waited so long. I mean, Mojo was such a good docker. Have you blocked it in a mess? It didn't just, it didn't just compel me, right? It didn't just compel me to go, I'm gonna message Russell. Go to Russell's number, have you got a block? Because then he's text wouldn't you?

Oh. Have you got a block? No, no. Oh. That's a block. What is this? It says unblock this call. What?

Russell, blocked by a Blake. That is the news. That's the same thing that happened to our mate, Tim. My phone does this out. What are our best mates, Bartley? Tim goes, why are you responding to my messages? He's like, what are you talking about, mate? And I'm accidentally blocked. Could you please show, mate? And I hadn't accidentally blocked.

Well, could you please show Hamish the note I sent back to him after he sent me a very nice note regarding Mojo? Yeah. And then you'll see that I missed a phone call, which you've just referred to at the beginning of this podcast. And I've sent a text saying, I'm now off the phone. I then tried you twice.

Yep. I'm going to go. And it just, it's because you're locked. It just went straight to the place. So after the mojo, why don't you go and go and go and go and go and go and go and go. This is our first time. You're a champ, age. A good, a bit of reference to the docker.

You're a champ, age. Good ad story. Hope to do another one at some point. I see you and Femme and Bondo Hower real. Now that my job determines, I can't live in Sydney, all of a sudden it's a greater allure. And he talks about coming up and sharing a boat with you. It'd be brilliant to catch up.

That's me, no? Because I hear a bit of a boat going on. Yes, we have access to a time share system where we can go for boat days. There you go, Harry, working class. You have this. Here I am just on this. It's, you know, I'm thinking I'm just growing what I feel like to be, you know,

amazing messages out there. Because you know, back in turns out that I've got the nicest guy on the world as we suspected you are, Russ. Hey, Russ, just you know. I'm not lying. Not since Hamish was single back when we were like in our early 20s have I seen him so distraught for someone not returning his text message. It used to happen a lot back of the day. He's having terrible flashbacks, but he did pursue you.

And this is great news that we've worked it out. I did say. Well, I said you.'s, it was at this end as well, Andy, you know. I'm really going to. Do you know what? I'm so glad we invented gunfire Russell because it's, we would never have discovered this. And I hope that for people listening, that the think they've been shot by a russ.

But in fact, in fact, open the segment up to him to anyone. I mean, it's still called Shun by Russell. But if you feel like you're being shunned and we would like to get to the bottom of it for you, is that a service? Or do you still want to relieve it strictly to Russell's? We're like, we can open it up. We can open it up.

Mystery Shunning. Shunning's warehouse. Shunning's warehouse. Shunning's warehouse. We'll take any shumming. That's right. You have to prove to us that you've gone and done that up. You did have a rapport.

Just like basically there will be a Tid system. If you get past the report test and we go, yep, that seems weird. It doesn't add up. We'll fall without adding up. But Russell, thank you so much for joining us we know you're busy I'm pleased to announce your unblocked congratulations you now have a you are you have a direct life see you buddy

Jason watch out hey one thing we promised to follow up on was loyalty cards. Obviously, we got 29, 900. We were given away, but of the 30,000 loyalty cards, a lot of people were getting their discounts across the town. It's a heinous, nanny loyalty card. We had a lot more interest than we had available cards to go out, which we apologize for, but it gives you 10% off every store worldwide, disappointing at the Australian Open Hand,

the Canadian club tent having some teething issues I noticed. You would assume that that's head office. I was just wondering, how would they have done that? I assume the Australian office would be well across it, but maybe it's they have sent someone out from Canada, but I'm just thinking with COVID, how do they do that? Yeah, I do, it's a shame. With a scandal, because it's clearly a Canadian that's working the desk

and it should have been across that. But anyway, it's a teething issue. With COVID. I don't know if the... It appears that there was one. It was a good news story. Yeah, I was playing golf at Sinanra's Beach Golf Class at a golf club, a guy walked past when he's way off

and he said, enjoy your round of said thanks and he said, by the way, very pleased that they accept the loyalty card here. Asked at the pro shop, they'd given him the five percent off and he'd shown his card. So, straight back to the pro shop. Yep. And...

You know, still the pro shop's love. Yep. I was... It's the card of this pro shop's love. Sorry, it's the card of the pro shop. Yep. And, you know, still the pro shops love. Yep. I was the card this pro shop's love. Sorry, it's the card the pro shops love. The store that Andy likes to shop at. I also like it. You do like it. It's one of your one-off your clubs.

I'm going to be careful. You don't want to play favourites amongst the one plus club you've admitted to being a member to on the show. It's a public golf course. LAUGHTER Um, seem to treat it like a private club. I did. I was buying a frozen yogurt for my daughter. Yeah.

First few days that I'd moved to Sydney. Pleasure to cut. And so I don't know. I was just somewhere in the RANWIC area. Yeah. I'm at the counter, right? I was, I only had tap and go, so I don't know if my wallet, I mean, that's got the card in it.

It wasn't doing the card. God walks up behind me and goes, I do accept the Hamish and Andy Laulti card to the girl serving me. What did she say? And she went, I'm not sure, it's possibly a student or a backpacker. I detected an accent. I'm just saying perhaps fresh new to the country again, so maybe not across the, across the Laulti card situation. She said, I'm not sure what that is. And I had the privilege of being the passerby. And I said, oh,

you should tell everyone takes that. I said, yeah, everybody does it. It's 10% off. Everything. Really. So you could see it or I was going, wow, management hasn't mentioned that. And then I said, but the great news is 5% straight back to the store. It's the store. The car, the store's love. And she went, it sounds a car. Management hasn't mentioned that. And then I said, but the grain uses five percent straight back to the storage. The car, the car, the stores love. Yep. And she went, it sounded like a good idea.

And then he was able to get the discount because I was like a stooge in the audience going, yeah, everyone takes this car. Like a politician's press conference. Yeah. Oh, one more question, Minister. How is it that you're so generous to the people of your electorate

get balanced the books perfectly? Thank you, great question. So we've got an extra 100 to give away. We've got 15,000 people standing by for a chance to win that 100. We said we'd have some kind of lottery. Hame, the idea sprung to us that no one picks up their phone anymore. It should be a triumph to pick up your phone. So the game we're gonna play now

is of that 15,000 people that are registered. We're gonna ring the random number. If they pick up, if they pick up, they've got themselves a loyalty card, and less, we call another number, and they pick up. There's a chance for the steal. There's a steal. It's different to what I like about this handle is usually

if this was on radio, there would be like three months of build up, you know, you know, this was the today show, be like, don't be away from the phone, whatever. No one knows we're doing this. Because we didn't talk, we haven't talked about it before and now it's just happening. It's just happening, I don't know.

So it's like, if you pick up, you really deserve this loyalty card. Olivia is the first person I'm going to try. She was standing by. Good luck, Olivia. Jesus, she picks up. The mobile phone you have called is currently not accepting incoming calls. Outbound situation only. OK, then this is a thing. I've actually never heard that. On her opportunity. I've heard this number is disconnected,

but not, yes, I'm still using the phone, but I don't accept incoming calls. Rebecca's the next number. Beep. Beep. Beep. She's done. Thank you for calling me and I'm not connecting.

No, no. No, no. No, no. No, and I'm sorry, I'm not saying no to the COVID outbreak. I understand that. That's serious. We're just saying, no, that was a hang up, too. Yeah.

That was a decline. Rebecca now knows if she listened to this back that she missed out. She declined. A loyalty card. She declined 10% off everything worldwide. Quick private conversation over here in the kitchen Andy. How long will we do this for? We'll people that I don't want to speak in front of Jack because I know that I'm just, you know, he gets worried about so many things. But how long will we go for the old no pickups?

Not long. Okay. Sorry about that, Jack. We you're just in the kitchen. Have a good chat. Let's try another one. Okay. This is Kayla. Kayla speaking. Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla.

It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla.

It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla.

It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's It's Kayla. It's Kayla. It's It's Kayla. Hey, how you going? Yeah, great and guess what Kala I think that's what inside of you. I Don't know if this is for real. It's for real You know is for real Kayla true or false you applied for a Hamis Andy loyalty card But after the 2,900 driverway cut off. That is true. You've won yourself one out of the lottery.

At the moment, you are staring down the barrel of one of the last 100 loyalty cards, unless unless for reasons that we can only put down to, because we thought it'd be fun and it adds an element of jeopardy. We have introduced whoever picked up their phone first gets the card and less than very next person we call picks up their phone and then they will have stolen it from the, yeah, there's a steal element. Did I steal it from someone else? No.

No, you at the moment are the king and we will see if the thieves steal your card. Are you ready? Are you ready? Yeah, I think so. OK, Jack, who are you calling? This is Chris. Good luck, Eilach. Chris Kudstiel.

Kaila, at the moment, in full possession of card 29, 9-1. Yep. BEEP. BEEP. All right, this is Gabby. Please, please. No, I'm not going to fight anyway.

Anyway, he has nothing to do with it. You've got to kill him. You've got it, you've won! Oh my God, that was awesome. It's all yours. You've got Law of E-card number 29901 and look forward to what is 10% off every store worldwide. You can have an absolute ball with that Cali. Enjoy, enjoy, drink, or on you.

Good on you mate, well done. See you guys, see you mate, well done. See you guys. See you tonight. Oh, tough break for Chris. Listen up.