Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2023 Ep 207

Episode Date: April 12, 2023

1. Ear camera surprise 2. Just the sausage - Another Bunnings update 3. Time is tight, guess the movie right - special skill 4. New health stars info 5. Power Moves 

A list-snuff production. Activate your internet. Because the Hamish and the podcast starts in three, two. Sorry, still buffering. One. A hoi-timi, cata, hamish. I will cut it to the mill, perfectly every time.

Ahoi to me, hamper. Yeah, and I will hamper... We'll have the mill for a time's mill. Oh, okay. Hamper times a mill. I'm the ferrier. Okay, there's no hierarchy today. No, no. In fact, I would trust you the most, him as the catter.

Well, of course, when you work at the sex robot factory, I must carefully cut the outline out, give them to Jakku, text them, test tests them out, and then Andy, you get them to the stores. You ferry them to the stores. Of course, there's someone else in there, the cleaner, who's very important. No, um, any, any ideas, you'd have to cut this. We're not making drugs, are we? You don't have to hump them.

You... Like a farm. No, no. Actually, the guy that carries them to the tractor. Hey, good. Watermelons. Close bananas. Oh.

Banana farmers. We are today. And yes. Where was the hump of doing? For us, you're carrying the bananas. So, because they come in these big stores. Yeah, I chop today. Yes, yes. Where were we to the hump of doing so? You're carrying the bananas, so because they come in these big stores, they come in with a machete. I like to hump on my back, yep. And then you've got the hump on your back,

and then I'll ferry them. Most, most probably in India. Um, really? The world's largest supplier of bananas. Is it really? I wasn't going to pup trivia last night. Well, that all I wanted. Yeah, I went south America America and everyone was like,

oh, India, fun facts. Anyway, little turbocharged for anyone else that might run into the same question. Max also used the easy to use system. HamishNani.com, if you wanna upload what you've been up to hit us there at HamishNani.com, but Max from Florida. Oh my boys, this is Max from Florida.

I just had a lot of say, Andy, you got, oh my God, there's someone in my house. I don't know what to do. I need to grab a weapon or something. I don't know. I'm not near any knives or anything. I don't know what to do. Oh, I got an idea. Okay, I'm alive. Okay, thank god I was near my snack drawer. I grabbed a towel around it.

And I just went for it. I'm alive. I'm okay. Thank God I was near my snack droid, grabbed a towel around, and I just went for it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Thank you. That was the closest our show has ever got to really well-produced true crime. Where you guys thinking that? I think everyone listening was like, yeah, this is like a crossover with the true crime broadcast. Max, obviously, good reason to have a total and don't be scared of total loans, Jack,

because they can save your life from an intruder. Well, if I got given one, I actually would have it on hand for many years because I would never have eaten. But could you not nibble the back that's the flat side? You could nibble that and then glue the sharp bits to a baseball bat. You get both weapon and treat. If someone does hand you a toberum, will you put on a protective glove to receive it?

Leave it all in here. It's true that even the packaging is a bit sparky. Yeah, it's a bit sharp. Yeah. Handle with care. Handle with care. Hey, okay, it's been more documented on this show that I am susceptible to the algorithm on Instagram. Oh, yeah.

It knows me better than I know myself. It's completely infected my brain. It is me. I know the world is a wash with people, you know, the stories are going, I didn't even, I didn't tell anyone that I was thinking that. Yes. And then it came up. The problem with me is, it means many problems with me, but the problem that I have from a vulnerability to advertisers background is the most, the purchase I probably buy the most of is I fall for an ad I've never seen this out loud me my phone. It knows it knows already.

Oh, you're already best. The the structure of the ad that gets me the most is when something's the world's most comfortable. Yes. The world's best. Yeah. And I what I realized lately was, it's the, that company telling me it's the most comfortable,

it's not the international federation of shorts telling me that these are the world's most comfortable shorts, it's that company telling me that their shorts are the world's most comfortable shorts, or this torch. Has been verified. This torch company telling me it's the world's brightest torch, or this is the world's most practical tactical knife or whatever it is And I keep falling for that company telling me that they're the best

That's the tricky part for me. So anyway In in amongst all the the the flight of stuff that's coming in are you building up a resistance to it? I'm actually on a bit of a I'm doing trying to do one month. We're instead of buying the stuff I'm riding it down and then at the end of the month. I see if I want it. I'll give you the list. I'll give you the list I'll give you the list. I'll give you the list. Anyway, something came in the other day that I forgot I bought but it was Pre-pre-the-month and this is the other category which is This is a much more niche one, but this is popped up before with me Technology or medical instruments that I can't believe are available to the labors.

You do like that. You actually bought me some dental scrapers. Couldn't believe you could, I thought those specialists dental equipment, but you can buy them as a labors. I get into work and Hayme goes, hey, I got your present, right? And Hayme, it's still in the, like, sanitary, like, you know, to peel back and the little scratchy instruments where they do the grass. Have you been using it at home? Well, it's a bit, it feels scary to use by yourself.

I used it before I went to the dentist and they were like, you've been doing very well. Do they really? Mm-hmm. You're a guy would be different, because you see an elastic dentist, so they're probably looking at your face. Yeah, the elastic guy. You aren't using him anymore, do you? No, I'm just, since I moved house by doing Miss Him Nail, I've been thinking about going

all the way back to him just because he takes your kneecaps to take your molos out. It's a very impressive guy. He's going to be smack on the bottom of my wisdom check. He's a listing, but that means he does the whole, everything including the mouth and the teeth. So he will get there eventually. I don't want to travel. I'm not going to do it.

Mate, I've got a two o'clock. When you reckon you'll be off the wrists and heading towards the jaw. So what is, what is he doing? While your stress levels can be, give you causing you tooth pain. Right. So he gives you a message.

He's giving me a mouth massage before. That's called a Kirstack. And he should not all dentists work at the train station. Like a jaw massage. That would. It feels really good. Okay. Well, we're in the sphere of the head for today's medical device that I was able to get online, but not the mouth.

It is the ears. Oh, I'm interested. Wireless, light up, fiber optic, camera ear pick. So it sinks to an app on your phone. Wonderful. Right. Now, of course, I'm holding up what appears to be some flimsy packaging from China. It looked a lot better when I bought it, of course, online. I had to play with this.

Wait, so it's filming the inside of your ear. Look at this. Why would you want to see that, though? Because you can look. Okay. I go in. Look at this. Do you want to see some footage for I took earlier? Not really. I do. Because I get my ears cleaned out every six weeks. Yeah, you don't want to see it.

Yes, they send a little... Here's a screen shot. Oh, God, what a screenshot. See, the works in here. Here's a screenshot from inside the ear. And look, Jack. That's like a fair brick, by the way. Here's a screenshot of me looking at it.

I would say the quality is pretty good. What a pretty good. So that's after I pulled it out and I was in the background going, look at that! We'll put that up on our pipes with a warning. Your favorite pipe, a Ptuchu favorite pipe, whether it be Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok. I'm gonna fire this up, okay, Jack.

So you can see, so what I have to do is I have to turn this instrument on. It's like a pencil shape, you can see it's got like an LED light at the end. It can be turned inside that and it's got a little white. What's the end of the hook made out of the soft silicone. Yeah, amazing. So check this out, all right. I'll link this together. It's going to take me one second.

So it kind of looks like the end of a sewing kind of apparatus thing there and then Haynes got a handle attached, but it's got a little white light and Haynes. I'm watching in real time now on Haynes' phone as he's putting the pick in his ear, this is disgusting. And we can see not just that much at the moment. Oh, it's a bit... It's a bit... It's a bit...

I'm just shooting blind here. Yeah, yeah. But you can see, that's the quality. I would say as well. And your ears are super clean now. Yeah, you have to spend an hour cleaning it out this morning. What I was playing with this thing.

I think I want this. This is the first thing I've ever bought. How good is this? Don't you think though, it's that feeling of going, I can't believe I have this. This is the technology you think that you have to go to, yeah, like, someone said you have to go into state to get this technology, be like, okay, I'll do it.

In America, I remember I had to get my ears cleaned in America. It's always very creepy when you're looking yourself out here, come here. And it was $720. Yep, it's the same thing. And that's pretty much all they did. No, this is about 50 bucks, right?

Now, it obviously comes, I've got two extra heads. Do you guys have a play? Oh, all right, all right. Because, come on, Jack. It obviously comes I've got two extra two extra heads. You guys have a fight Because you know you don't have to use my like we'll just that's my my wax on it now But it comes with like a family pack of heads and switch Oh, so we take the head home and then when we want to turn bring it back all right actually Can we play a game? I'm just thinking this now because I'm now watching this thing I'm just thinking of this now because I'm now watching this thing Like got my nose up his nose. He's as

Conbunding so um Jack I want you to Look away from Guess which party your body You have to name where actually so close your eyes first and I'll tell you tell me when I start looking at the phone Yeah, Hamish is now placing the camera in an orifice Have a look now. Yes. Well, okay. Okay. What are you thinking? Okay, so I can see here It looks kind of bright. So I don't think I'm anywhere too deep. Dark and deep. Dark and scary. How do you know I don't bleach? Or I can I'm in an armpit. You are not.

Guess what? You're in the armpit of the stomach. I'm in the belly button. That actually was pretty fun. No. See. The thing was pretty fun. No, see! No! No! See! No!

See! See! Hey, muffin things come up on the show, and it's an avalanche. Yeah. More and more information about a certain part of society, and you go, wow! That's true. You didn't realize how deep this ran. And I'd like to give a particular tip of the hat, or refocus everyone's attention on

the times that happens. Peter ends. Peter all in. Yeah, let's get it. Peter all in. It just stacks on Pete. Because let's not just focus on the times. That things do by the sheer necessity of scarcity of time.

Something's Peter out. We have too many ideas and evolution. And often because evolution. Evolution. Peter ends, they must be peter out. This is a perfect ecosystem. Yeah, exactly. If they're all trying to get in the room,

and we've already had too many peaters in, unfortunately. What if the idea police come past and they say to our idea, the answers, shall we see a clicker? Yeah. We want to know that we have, just as many peaters out as we get peeders in. I'm always room for this.

When I was at Bunnings over the government mandate and break, and the sausage sizzle, and I saw someone said, I'll have a Bunnings sausage. Yeah. No, sausage. We've since had another person right here in with regards to this. So then, I mean, we all, lest we forget, I can't remember out the dear friend's name who called the show and she was talking about as you chased the grease. Yes.

She was a fan of sausage grease. So not vegetarian. Yes. Like the grease on the onions, but wouldn't eat a sausage per se. Drue the lime there. She thought the sausage because you don't know where they've been. Yes. But the grease to have a greasy bit of bread with onions and tomatoes. The second hand smoke, I'm all in. Madeline joins us today. She works at a Bunnings sausage sizzle.

Okay. Madeline, or who are you? Hello, who are boys? How are you? How are you? So much. First of all, Madeline, is it the same charity each time, or are you a worker for, and they rotate different charities

that you're running the, kind of raise the money for? This was a one off, this is like our charity does it once a year I think. So this was all, I was a first sizzler. Okay, so can I ask another question? Is it their equipment? Is it Bunnings as equipment? You just just get a go or do you have to bring your own equipment? Lots it Bunnings as a equipment? Yeah. Just get a go. Or do you have to bring your own equipment? Lots of their equipment. But then usually there's like a team manager that organizes all of the

stuff, all the sausages and all the bread and all that. From Bunnings or from you. No, from the charity. You bring your own manager. Yeah, it's quite an organized operation. So what do you do to quit? Sir, you're a caterer. Look at all the leaders trying to get them to off. Is that so if I was to go one week for a sausage, I'm not necessarily getting the same brand of sausage because it might be up to the individual charities team managers to locate. That's actually true. Yeah. Interesting. of sausage because it might be up to the individual charities, T managers, to low key. That's actually true. Yeah.

Interesting. So people, I think, believe, I think people have a quality location assumption as we heard where you go, oh, you know, the Keysborough bannings, I love that bannings, they do good sausage. It could actually just be you got lucky with the charity that day. It could be the Lions Club that weekend, but then the next weekend they're in Danny Nong. So you better off driving a denog if you want the same quality sausage.

But that lady we talked to a couple weeks back who said that she chases the grease. That could happen because it could be the same barbecue. It's probably the angle of the hot weight that's catching the kind the amount of grease she likes. Yes. Regardless of sausage. Yeah.

Oh boy. Okay, covering off a lot of stuff. So Maddie, quick question. What charity do you sizzle for? Catherine House in Adelaide. They're a sanctuary for women experiencing homelessness. What I know. So if you sizzled at locations that aren't bunnings,

but this was your, I don't even know what you're on for, but the story in question, the timing question when you're at bunnings, is that your first time sizzling at bunnings? Yes, yes, first time. Tell us through what happened with you, Maddie. So a man asked for a sausage and I said any onion and he said no, nothing. And so I called out his order and then he really intently said I don't want bread either. I just want the sausage. Ah!

Okay, the complete inverse. Now. So when we were doing that, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we didn't think of this. Really does just show that, I mean, you know, sausage customers are a spectrum. And there's no typical sausage customer. And they are always right, because they're the customer.

But did you say, sir, where should I place this? I have a hot sauce in your hand, sir, or may I give you a napkin? It was. It was an intense moment, because you think, if I have misread this, I have really misread it. You can be decarifunding a nude hot sausage in a man's hand, you would think that's probably the most foe of paths.

That's right. That's the foeiest of the paths. So you would be nervous as all get out. Yeah. How do you know that Nia is nervous as a woman who swaddled it in a serviet, but it's not good. That's not good, because it's going to have wet oily nap serviet on it. You stick sometimes when the serviet goes too long, and the serviet sticks to it, then you're going to pick off the whole thing.

And that's the whole thing. Is that what he wanted? I don't know what he wanted. Well, if you listen, if you're that person, we'd love to get to the bottom of what you wanted. And I think I know the answer for this. Well, I ask it anyway. No sauce.

Nothing. Just ate it like a zufid over. LAUGHTER The sacked on it. LAUGHTER Wee! There's a steady... Straight there and he's wet boardies. LAUGHTER

One thing half an hour before we could have a swim again. Three days sausage. Interesting. Well, Matty, thank you for sharing these. It's important people like you that are brave enough to reach out and tell us about sizzling experiences. And your brain starts, your mind runs now, doesn't it, to go, okay, what could possibly beat that? Oh, you know, can I just have raw onion, please?

Could I eat the napkin? Like, there's not too many more strange things than that. Oh, you know, can I just have raw onion please? Could I eat the napkin? Like there's not too many more strange things than that. It'd be great to hear that. You squash the raw. Could you put the raw sausage meat in my eyes? No matter how hard I scream, just stop. Maddie, thank you so much. Really appreciate, Tom. Thank you so much, Faith. Wow. Bye. Wow. So, I welcome. Thank you. How are you feeling? A bit nervous. Yeah, that's effective.

We've actually come into a really elaborate setup. Not the normal studio we're in the next room. Because your special skill requires a special stadium. We thought to accurately recreate the simulation. Yeah. Do you want to give everyone a snapshot of your skill? Well, it involves movies. Yeah. I just found my family would always be watching movies at night as you do.

And I just walk in and be able to tell what that movie is instantly without no prior knowledge. Yeah. And it doesn't matter if I know the movie or not, just somehow able to do so. You're getting, you're walking in and going like, fell you're a launch, even though I've never seen it. Yeah, I could not have seen the movie,

but if I have enough, I guess, info? Yeah. And this is the special- I don't know, I wouldn't say like really vintage movies, but if I have an idea of the movie, I think I could get it. We picked popular films. Well, then hopefully slam dunk, slam dunk. You in your submission to us were like,

look, if it runs for sort of five seconds. Yeah, just as it, like a glance as you're coming past. A glance. Five seconds is fine. That's really good. You really good. So we're, we're going to discuss, I think it's fair

if you get two seconds of looking at a screen. So what we thought we would do is we've picked a minute, like a kind of a, what we think is a fair minute from each film, was that right Mike? I mean, you've been in charge of editing these. Yeah, a minute except from the film.

All popular films. Yep, yeah, yeah. And what we want to do is we're in a blacked out room here. We'll start playing the minute. You to make this fair and like a, at a bit of randomized fairness to it. You can then walk in at any point during that minute. Yeah, right?

So we can't really rig it. So I choose, you choose the zone within the minute. You could walk in between four and six seconds. So I'll be able to see myself up here and walk in. 51 and 53 seconds, you know what I mean? Like you just got to walk in some time within a minute. You could walk in between four and six seconds, or you could see myself up here and walk in. 51 and 53 seconds, you know what I mean? Like you just gotta walk in some time in that minute. And as soon as you walk in, Michael, wait for a two count, then turn it off.

Be generous with a two count one. Yeah, two beats. Yeah, then pause it, then you look at us because we're gonna be your mum and dad. You go, hey mum and dad. Who do you think's more like your mum and who's more like your dad out of the tours? Oh, you're definitely my mum. Thank you. Yeah, hey Mum and Dad. Who do you think's more like your Mum and who's more like your Dad out of the tools? Oh, you're definitely my Mum.

Thank you. She fast and loose. Yeah, a bit fast and loose, I'd say. And I have a powerful feminine energy. Yeah. I'm very proud of that. Okay, so, and do they have spots in the couch where we be in the ride already?

I reckon you'd be spot on, yeah. Okay, great, yeah. So, I'm very accurate. And look, and I'm, you're late. So, I'm late, I'm late, you're late, because that's how I prefer to cross my mind. I do too. Again, you're late. I'm lately lagging, because that's how I prefer to cross my mind. I do too. Again.

This is a powerful feminine in it. Okay, so we'll be your mum and dad. Yeah. We're watching a film. You walk in, as soon as you break that seal on that door, you come in, you get a two count,

we pause it, tell us what for. Now, okay. I want you to say it in that format. We go, Hey mum and dad, are you enjoying the Titanic? Yeah.

Or whatever the movie happens to be. I'll keep the realism. OK. And then we'll respond. And we'll respond. I mean, what you want to hear us say is, yes, we are darling. And we've got five films. How many him?

Four out of five? Four out of five. All right. Mike, we haven't got the Titanic. There is no Titanic. Okay, well this now is a down a bit, though. So at least 4 out of 5 now that we've given you a clue that Titanic's not in there. All right, Zach, you jump out.

Let's get it right. Just one quick sight. Zach will pick the movie right. Here we go. I think it's it for softball is first one. And this is such a thing. I mean to me it is. I know every frame of this movie. For everybody, it's Wayne's well. Yeah. And we should start the film now, Mike.

Whenever Zach comes in at door... I mean, if he comes in now... Chuck up a tea by the way, darling? No, thanks. Oh, honey. Sorry. I mean, this is the Madera's... The Erosmith concert.

I mean, if he comes in now, this is... This is the menace. It's just coming in. Oh, it's coming in. I can... All right, all that says, oh, hey, mum and dad. Hello, darling. What are you watching here? Oh, that's Wayne's world.

One or two, darling. That is... Two. Oh! Now, I love you very much. And I feel like a real last whole month. Because you were right. And I've sure cat amongst the pigeons.

Sun, I've never been more disappointed with you. Hey, you need that a little bit harder for you. But he does. Alice Cooper. Alice Cooper isn't in two. Yeah, it's like I'm going to be in a room. He's even on the freeze frame. Yeah, very true.

What are we saying? It's a great warm up. I feel like I should go back to my room. He's even on the freeze frame. Yeah, very true. What are we saying? It's a great one. I feel like I should go back to my room. Honestly. I think you've got a room and we're going to watch another movie. We'll see you in a second. All right, no worries. You can't look out the water to him.

Well, yeah. He's zero for one. You've got to get all four in the row. You're going your house. See what we can do now. It takes up to you and that regards. You're soft, soft-minded. That was never too manipulated.

All right, let's go to the next film. Okay, things are going on. That's a stunning loss. Oh, looks like a minute black. I would know which one. I haven't seen that in black. Yeah, I think it's, is it number two, Mike? Number two.

Okay, he's number two. Okay. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay.

He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay.

He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. He's waiting a bit longer. Okay. Okay. Okay. Before he's still here. I mean it's all pretty slappers and like when will we see him emerging all in camson? Hello darling. Hey, how's it going? Yeah. Good. Thanks son. Oh, what's on TV tonight? Well, you think it is. Looks like men in black. Number one or two or three or four? By looks of it, I'm just gonna go one.

I'm just going to go one. Oh, I see. Oh, boy. It was a toss-up between one or two. So what's your choice? Well, I've got to go one, don't I? Yeah, you can't change. Oh, boy. Hey, don't try and help out yourself.

It's a mother's instinct. It's a mother's instinct. It's a rule. Here's in fact number two, so. Oh, no. Yes. Okay, number two, so. Oh no. Yes. Okay, go to your room, think about what you've done. Let's give him a half, it's a half inch.

It's a half inch, I mean, we are making it difficult there. Well, I feel like I'm going to be more... There's no more getting the little glances I come in. Mark, can we see if are there any more sequel based movies? No, the rest are all standalone. Did you get three from three from now on? Yeah. We did him with the sequels.

Can I, I think you've got to give him Wayne's World because he did say Wayne's World, and then you threw him by saying one or two. Don't speak to my wife like that. What are you doing in our house? Who are you? What's this guy doing here? We thought this was one of Zach's friends. Do you not know this guy doing here? We thought this was my exact friend.

Do you not know this guy? I thought it was just boyfriend. Alright, darling. Yeah, we've done. Sorry about Mike. Darling. I thought you knew him. No, I don't know him.

Thank you for coming over to our house and playing movies for us. Please play the next movie. Next movie, please. I'll move you. Ooh. Brad to pre. So is it you mean pre on it? It's just Brad to pre on the desk.

Who is this? I'm you. Oh. American Beauty. It's American Beauty. It's American Beauty. Kevin Spacey again. Hi darling. Hey. Hey, son. You know you're welcome to join us anytime.

We just like to pause the movie when you come to the living room. Well, Pause the movie when you come to the living room. Well. Oh, we've got a nice, nice little movie on. Nice classic, I see. Certainly not modern due to some canceling issues. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Having a lot of kids in space lately. So we do seem to be watching quite a few movies, but people are, yeah, we're, we're falling from grace. It seems to be our favorite genre. We rolled down it on Netflix. Stars that are fallen from grace. He's a new category, might also like Harvey Weinstein. So that sort of marks false. Jack, I feel like I've chosen a bad time to walk in. Well, I mean, the lead protagonist, Kevin Spacey, is on the screen when we're with him.

Yeah. I'm just having a blank on the Kevin Spacey catalog at the moment. Right. Yeah, I can get to people. Yeah. All right, I'm just going to say just to put it out there, I'm just going to say seven. I know it's not, but I can't get anything else. What are you going to do these things?

Sun. It's American Beauty. Oh, yeah. We will give you a token of no value as in Hamish and Andy will. Yeah. As your father, I still love you. Not disappointed anymore. No, not disappointed.

As Andy, I'm extremely disappointed. Sure. The actor. Yeah, the character's very proud. Yeah. Never tell anyone that you can do. No, I like going for bonus rounds. What about, okay, doesn't have to leave. Let's just play the next one.

Literally the first frame. Just freeze the first frame of the next one. Is it too easy? Okay, I think it's impossible. All right, good. Okay, here we go. Oh, it's impossible. All right, good. Okay, here we go. Oh, it's the Batman. Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! What are you saying? That's our boy!

That's our boy! That's our boy! Oh, that's our boy! Should we let that recover? Yes! Yes! Yes! I was saying to your father after you left,

that would not help you with the house deposit. We're helping you with the house deposit, we're changing them all. What was saying to your father after you left, they were not helping with the house. We're helping you with the house, they were changing them all. What was the give of it? Like, three guys, it's the best scene in the movie, by far, it's when the Batmobile starts revving up. But the Batmobile's not in there.

No, you're just guys in the dark shooting from behind the car. I mean, like, I know Colin Firth, he's in the middle. I call him Farrell. Colin Farrell, sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he doesn't even, like, he didn't the middle. Colin Farrell. Colin Farrell, sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he doesn't even, like, you didn't even, I see anything is so dark.

I love movies so dark. Yeah, incredible. We can't give him a coin. We can't give you a coin. You bought us a lot of joy. You bought us a lot of joy, and you certainly know any of the frame of shame. You really bought it back and back.

And you can tell people that you could do this. I'm sorry, but I redeemed myself. I feel like the walk in maybe, I know it's accurate to what I said, but it can throw you off depending on what time you come in. Because you've got to think about how you walk. Yeah, yeah. If we step, we're thinking going on. That's true. Yeah, we deliberately introduced motor skills to bamboos. Thanks for covered in Zach. That's true. Yeah, we just literally introduced motor skills to members of you. Thanks for covered in Zach. That's all right.

Thanks for having me. You're going to take another vote, you Zach. Amazing. Amazing. And I don't go back to this case. You know, I need plausible evidence to go back to investigate the health stars. Yeah, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. We've investigated the health star system, tried to get to the bottom of it so many times and just when you think you find the latest inconsistency, like the same product being labeled different health stars in the supermarket, you think that's gotta be the end of it. That's gotta be case closed.

That's all one big thing. Again, the week actually cannot, if I can be in the market. No, of it. That's got to be case closed. I saw one again the week actually. I think I've been. Yeah, great. No, of course. Every time I go to the supermarket, I still can't, I still never feel like I've finished scratching this edge. Two things overseas can't,

I'll come back to you on what the exact country that they have the same system that A, B, C, D, E and F. Yep. And some products can get an F. Yeah. Which seems very harsh. I mean, can you get a zero in health stars or in Smallest you the smallest I've seen is 0.5. Yeah

There was a thing back when the formula one was in Melbourne The saviest driver George Russell was given the classic. Here's a bunch of Australian stuff to have a look at It's a core cat. It's veggie mite. You know, there's timtams in there. And they do run a point five. Really? Which again, they're, I mean, they're of sometimes food, so that's, that's a delicious treat. But again, sour cream, we've always felt that sour cream's unfairly given a point five. But timtams do have probably a plausible point five. You can't, it's not too much healthy about a timtent. He was blown away. It's first, you got the impression it was the first time he'd seen the Hellstar, the Hellstar ratings. And he was flabbergasted. Why any product would would would label itself as a 0.5? Like, you know, why would a

comedian put up a one star review on their poster? Probably he's thinking like he's not walking around talking about all the times. He's crashed the car. He probably rather focus on the poster. Probably he's thinking like he's not walking around talking about all the times he's crashed the car. He probably rather focus on the wins. But it just goes to show it's a it's a concept that confuses even the elite. We prefer emails at hamishink.com about the subject, but I got this one. It must have been so hot off the top. In this guy's hands, he's at the supermarket. I got it on Twitter, he's from Ben. It's mixed berries, it's warworth, it's mixed berries, you get your blueberries, you frozen, frozen, frozen mixed berries.

He said, they're the exact same, how many times have we seen this? How many times have we seen this? They're the exact same, I still have a number. Five, yep. And it'd be the same flavor, same. The five hundred gram packet. Yep, it a number five. Yep. And it'd be the same flavor, same five hundred, the five hundred gram packet. Yep. Is 4.5 stars.

The kilo packet, five stars. If you can eat, so it's healthier to order double. If you can eat a kilo, you're in luck. I mean, by that logic, if you can eat like a hundred kilos of Tim Tam's. Like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey approach a ton of Timterams, you might, overall, they might be close to five stars. We've often, it's become accepted wisdom here because again, you get snatches of like, I heard this and, you know, my sisters housemate worked for the organization and they reckon this. One of the snatches of information we get is that you, the reason you run a point five star is because if you're in the, if you want to run any of the stars,

you have to list all your products. You can't choose what product to play, stay out of it. Well, then I, then someone sent me this, right? From Sunrise, okay? You know the instant, like the 42nd microwave, It's a rice packet. Yeah, lovely. Instant rice. So they're all fun rice. And the three varieties of rice, this person's got them bought the three varieties of rice in the 42nd packet. Long grain, white rice, three and a half stars. Okay.

I feel it should be closer to four. That's it. But that's okay. We're just talking about opinions there. Which is, I know it's many of these. I do feel like it's based more on opinion. Jasmine Rice, also three and a half stars. In the middle,

Basmati, Aromatic White Rice, doesn't play. Same brand. Same brand. Same brand, not playing. Marty, aromatic white rice doesn't play. Same brand. Same brand. Same brand not playing. So son, son, that goes again. That's how it comes as Marty.

Marty doesn't have to play if everyone else is playing. You get exactly. So you got a note from his mum. You got these other rice that's played today. Doesn't know. He doesn't have to play. Got a note from the bigger pack, I guess, the one minute bag of rice saying, no, 40 seconds doesn't have to play.

So you've got these other rice to send, they're going, well, we're not proud of 3.5, because you're not proud of anything under a four. Oh, yeah, great. You'll wear it, but it's not. Some comedians will put it all up. It's not good for sales. It's not good for sales. The other reason you put for 3.5 star reviews up if you're a comedian is if

the fourth star is half hollow and half filled in. And that's a lot. These are three and a half star reviews. But to the casual glance, it would seem four stars. Or you only use a bit of the quote. Yeah. So if you know, fantastic. Was, but it was terrible.

Yeah. But you just use the fantastic. Was. But it was terrible. Yeah. You just use the fantastic. Yeah. So anyway, Basmati is somehow, again, every time I feel like, every time I get a rule about the system, we lose a rule. Every time you think you can hold on to some solid fact here, it's, it's shaken from underneath your feet. Check this out.

I got another email from someone at habichanity.com. Good. Check this out. I got another email from someone at habichanay.com. Now this is obviously they don't feel that they can talk because their name is AINON ANONON MOSSO. So I think that is a fake name. But AINON thank you for writing. They said I can't say why? I can't say how. But in the last week of April, there's going to be a very big health star in it. That's right. Oh wow. So I don't know if it's a changing of the rules. Yes. Or, where they're going to explain why some people are playing, some people aren't. Maybe. We haven't. Maybe it's over.

We're nearing the end of April. This is, I mean, we haven't heard anything yet. But I just want everyone to be on alert. Good. Can people please write, I mean, everyone does a great job of keeping an eye on the health stuff out there anyway. But if anyone hears the press release or they're at the conference or, you know, let us know the big news because so far nothing. But one thing I have seen, I hope this isn't the way they're going. Someone else seen in a picture of a cafe in Australia that on its front, like where the outside tables are, it's got the cafe name.

And they're on those ballads that they sort of put up between you and the traffic. They've put their own hell star rating for the whole cafe name. They've read the cafe of four. That's just a sign on average. We could kind of bundle everything four. That's just the side of it. On average, we've kind of bundled everything together. If you ate the lot, it's about a four. I don't know if you can do it for the venue.

Hey, they're flooding in still, and it's look, it's one of the main reasons people listen to this pod, obviously for a light bit of entertainment but also to be able to get the better of anyone else in social situations through power moves. Have you set up close friends on Instagram? I've never got any. I haven't suggested a few times I haven't done it so this makes sense for people that are using the close friends feature. Which I think is you sort of nominate a select. If you follow like 500 people, you might nominate like a select 20 person group that you can share stories and stuff to them just for close friends.

Little green outline around it. Yeah, I'm so perfect. Okay. I might have Mike's close friend. Mike does close friends. Oh right. But I'm not one of Mike. I'm one of Mike's close friends. Mike does close friends. Oh, right. But I'm not one of Mike's friends. Interesting. Interesting. No, I'm I. That's okay. Well, we do, we do, you know, he runs a lot of our off-ear stuff.

So maybe we're more connecting off-ear, off Instagram than Jack, you'd be able to do this to Mike then, as a close friend. If you see a close friend's story and you've just been added to that person's close friend's list, this comes in from Alex Barlow, or Alex. If you've just been added to this person's close friend's list, always start the conversation by replying, hey, can you take me off your close friend's list? Please.

LAUGHTER MUSIC Right. This one came from Penny Luck, or Lack, sorry. When meeting up with someone and they've asked where they should meet, simply give them a street address and say you'll meet them out the front there. Make the address that of an adult entertainment shop and turn up late. They'll be looked at you out the front like a per. Very good. Very good. We've done the side story, side home facts. If we can pause for a moment, on the way home from school, that my school bus used to, you know, sometimes the bus stop

has the stop to make up time, back on schedule. One of the stops to make up time to get back on schedule. One of the stops to make up time was opposite an adult entertainment store. And there's only two shops, that and a real estate agent's next to each other. And there was a certain type of guy that you could pick a mile away who would seem very interested in the real estate and really give it a good thorough nod and a browse until there's sort of no one else around and then just do a bit of anyway. My favourite guy to play with kid. Okay, and a very good shop to have next door to. You'd think it wouldn't be. No, it's a really good thing to be like. Yes, window. We might move a few houses, my people accidentally try to cover till

there's less foot traffic around so they can walk in. Yeah, that's a smart way. Okay. Okay, power move. This comes in from Isaac. Made it work. Just asked me to hotspot him for data. I, of course, obliged. Then I noticed he was just scrolling Instagram. When I asked him why he needed my hotspot, he said he just didn't want to use his data for a little bit. He had plenty to spend. This is from Maz. He said, my sister did this to me.

The power move, the power move is thus. He writes, if you're eating your friend asks you a question, it's commonplace to signal with one finger that you'll quickly finish your mouthful and then you'll answer them straight away. It's often it's a finger up and then a bit of hurried chewing. Once you've finished and swallowed, instead of responding, just take another bite. take another bite. Really good. It comes in from Dom. If you see a shit car listed on Facebook Marketplace, message the seller asking if the car is still

available. When they reply yes, reply saying, I'm not surprised. Thanks for listening. The Hamish Nandy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamishanandie.com.