Hamish & Andy - Hamish & Andy 2023 Ep 231

Episode Date: September 27, 2023

1. Jack doesn’t want to talk about Mr Ralph 2. The deodorant sniffer - special skill 3. Croc wars - the secret tapes 4. Hamish's 'Do not review' 

A list-knife production. Activate your internet. Cause the hay mission and the podcast starts in three, two. Sorry, still buffering. One. A hoi to me hobo. No, not Hobo. No, no, no.

You think I know what we are, Jack? You vagabond. No. Homo, Herbillus. Oh. Herbillius? Herbillius. Yeah.

We're early men. Yeah, Homo, Herborectus. Homo, Arectus, you were going to... A Hoi, are you Jack? I'm Homo Arectus. Arectus turns into the humans we are now, dimwit? Well, no, Astral apethicus turned into, um, turned into homo sapiens. So why is Orectus so famous?

Because they stood up. First hominid to stand up. Yeah, pretty good. Good tall. Really good defense. I mean, when I was playing basketball that day, they were like, oh wow, these guys are good at making up. That's actually different.

That's very, that's a cool trick. Wish our spines did that? I'm also an athlete in the end of the fall. Oh, well done. Yeah. But you would hand the first true human species evolving in Africa two million years ago. Thank you. Jack, probably the earliest species to discover fire cooked food and of course, end up straight,

which is kind of interesting because you've got back problems. And you like that. You're now flat. You're now going, you're now like, flasidious. You're now bending back over after enjoying two million years of erection. Yes. Yes.

I'm of course, in the end of course, when you extinct about 40,000 years ago. And how does seem pretty recent? When you think about how? You were two million, seem pretty recent? When you think about how... You were two million, that's huge. When you think about how fast, you know, even just, I'm sure, you know, just zero to 2000 has gone. Yeah.

40,000 is not that long ago. And we're all homo sapiens, are we, right? That's us, yeah, that's right. But you made that sound like we all experienced the year zero to the year 2000. Well, I know we haven't, but you look back in your life, you know, when you look at ancient, when you look back in your life, you know. It seems to be that...

When you look at ancient, we're doing that two million years, it's not actually that. Inconceivable. Because, you know, homosens, we killed Neanderthals. Homosensin. No, no, homosensin didn't. Homosapiens. We're the ones that cause Neanderthals to go.

Homosensin ran into that, uh, ran into the tree after he fell asleep at the wheel, but no one was hurt. Yes, yeah. Yeah. Ahoy also to Sam, him, who's traveling overseas at the moment, and has a lot of date for us that he's uploaded at homie-shary.com. Ahoy boys, Sam here.

I've recently been overseas, and of course, I traveled in economy class with the common man. Good. No doubt when the Weaver travels, he's up in first. You can be found there. Anyway, my luggage was delayed a few days, so I had to ration the little tube of toothpaste the airline gives you, and I can confirm

that it is just not enough. You've got this one wrong Andy. I definitely need more froth. Anyway, I love your work Chaps. On a legend. Sam's got a lot of things wrong in that. That we appreciate him riding in. Ham, you wanted the top of the show tonight.

Sorry, I mean, he, he leveled the accusation at the Weaver for flying first, but we also know the Weasel. Yes. The Weasel. Doesn't mind flying right up the front. Sometimes on the pilot's lap, because he knows Mr Anthony. Mr Dr Froth, what's up there? Mr Ralph. Mr Ralph Ralph. Mr. Ralph.

Mr. Ralph. It never stops making me laugh. Mr. Ralph. Because it sounds so mafia. Yes. Mr. Ralph. Thank you, Mr. Ralph. 2000 thank yous.

Just bowing and backing out of the room after getting your discount. Well, he is a bit mafia, Don, because I've never even actually met him nor seen him. So I don't know what he looks like. I'll just contact him. You're the first to be at the foot of his bed when there was a hell of scare. How did he stocked up on flights? Well he actually just literally yesterday I got sent the confirmation email for next winter's flights which will be summer in the US. Wow. Thank you. Yeah, nearly a whole year ahead.

Which was across you, Mr. Ralph. Very nice. How far in advance can you buy the view? Yes, I do know. This seems like it only comes online once every 12 months. It's in some reasons, 11 months that the airlines will do the bookings in advance, where they'll do the schedule. So, look at the process. Look at the process of getting registered with Mr. Ralph. Okay. One second, but I just want to just drill down a bit more of this.

So you have thought, had the thought, we could book for 10 years. Yes, definitely. Yes. Did, did you go to a book for more than 11 months, one time? We've tried, obviously, we've tried to book because when he had a health scare, which looked like he might not be around for a long time, and thus the business class flights would dry up, we thought, what could we book 2024, 2025, 2016, 2016, how far can we go? And you can only go 11 months into the future. They release them.

OK. Can you talk us through the process? Once you've identified the flight, once you look at, you know, at 335 days out, you get online and you go, hey, Bianca, great. There's these flights. Yep. You know, flying in Miami. No, why do they do it then?

It's a little more fun. I 11 months away, but you go, flying in Miami. No idea what they're doing. I'm going to live a month away. I live a month away. You go, let's get these flights. What's the next process to get Mr. Ralph's approval? So we choose the flight, then we send them to Bianca's mum. Bianca's mum talks to Mr. Haster, wait till day where Mr. Ralph is in a good mood. How does she see that? She, she often goes over with a gift

basket or songs of praise because he goes, she see that? She, she off it goes over with a gift basket or songs of praise. Because he goes, she says that he goes through waves of not really wanting to help. And then some of that is, you're sucking up like a big goat leech. Fluttle eat. People live in a forest of leeches. So he knows as soon as he shows an uptick in mood, the doors get to get banged down but all these family members want him to fight. Brings him down again.

It's a rough roll of fate. So again, because mum is in charge of judging his mood. Yeah, she visits him in person. She has. So how does she judge his mood? Well, she'll just give him a call to any guys. I'm like,

oh, you're doing Mr. Ralph, how's your health? And then she's judged by that. If it feels like it's a good day, then she'll go, and you know what, Jack and Bianca would love to come back over again next year. But she'd have to do top up calls outside of when you're asking. Yeah, she's like lobbying the government. Yes, yes, she's got to play favorably to Mr. Ralph

all times at the end. And we thank her for that. You would. Does she, is she the gatekeeper for any other people's flights? Yep, she does. So they've got, Bianca's got two siblings. So my sister-in-law, her husband, they've just flew to Argentina. Have your family asked me to access.

That's where, that's where Bianca's mum drew the line. Because my mum tried to go over to the US on a Mr. Ralph flight. Mr. Ralph out. And bangers mom said no now we're getting we are getting a bit silly. Right. Pretty sweet. What's being his mom's relationship to Mr. Ralph?

She is a real estate agent who sold Mr. Ralfa House in Florida. That's the right. I thought they were family. Oh my gosh. Wow. So do you think your bankers mum, did you think about it a lot with your mum? Like all she liked or did she just have a pretty strict line that she's? This is, so there's so much shadow business around Mr. Ralf.

We don't actually know how much miles he's got in the allowance. I don't know if he used to be a pilot or there was word that he used to be the vice president of one of the major airlines. So we don't actually know what he's got. This makes more sense that you don't actually know because I thought it was a family matter. No, no, no, no.

Will I say I've never met him or know what he's like? He is a man. When did he buy that house off your wife's mum? Right, they've known him for years, like, for 10, 15 years, I don't know. And they're not giving up their relationship. Mr. Really, your mother-in-law is the gatekeeper here. Yes, yes. Well, she's doing all the dealing.

She knows Mr. Rouse Health at any one time. How old's Mr. Rouse? He's eight in his eighties, maybe 88. Would he come on the show? Well, no, no, because I don't want to jeopardize anything. I don't want to jeopardize anything. I actually don't even like talking about it because I don't want someone to go, you know, and American to be here and hear it and go, oh, Mr Ralph, we have talked about you on an Australian podcast and then he might lose his little. No, no, no, no, no, I don't want him any excuses for him he might lose the deal. He's alive. No, no, no, no.

I don't want him any excuses for him to turn off the tower. Let's find Mr. Rowland. No, you can't find him. You can't, because that's not even his surname. Rowland, Rowland, is his first name. Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland,

Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland,

Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, Rowland, I'm gonna text her now. Don't want it to go. Don't want it to go. I just don't want it to go. I don't want it to go. I don't want it to go. And we can tell. No, no. Shit, Jack. The guy that are going to agree about a free tumult bag.

Yeah, we can tell that you enjoy getting business class points for 5%. It's literally the most important thing in your life outside your family. So don't even joke about jeopardizing it. We can have a little joke about it, but don't worry, we won't do it. We won't do it. We won't do it. Hey, and people come to this show, hamishnety.com is their pathway to it, and we're one of our pipes,

but they go there to put down their special skills, something that they're exceptional at, they're not being properly recognized by society. Someone's come in and we've organized this for today. His name's John, and his special skill is that he can just by sniffing an armpit tell exactly what deodorant anyone is using any brand. Now it's because he works, he's a physio. He's not a public transport creep.

Just waiting until the tram's full and he can get lots of hands up. He's up in the air. On the overhead rail. He obviously when you are seeing people like that and you I guess more so than anyone else that consults in a small room, there's a lot of arms up, probably because you see a lot of shoulder stuff. So you do get, I don't know how he knows the brand though.

So, no, because that says he sniffed a lot of deodorant, but it means he asked for a question. That's what I was thinking. He must then go, links Africa or, yeah, you know, oh, what are we talking there, Rexona? Probably good. It's green, green, and...

It's a good small talk because small talk is tough when you're doing any kind of consultation, so it's probably like a scent. Something you can have a chat about. Anyway, the whole point who brought this up without him in here, because he has traveled here. It's come a long way. The cheapest available flight.

He's been here for hours. Yeah. The absolute red eye. Is that we were all going to come in and we're all going to lift our own pits And he was going to test we're going to test his skill We didn't put much more thought into it than that and the people testing he's happy to smell through a t-shirt Yep, it's going to be Jack and the myself

Darcy and Darcy in and Podcast Mike so we thought that's easy five, you know pretty standard if you listen to the show You know your eyes as it's a standard for out of five. We thought the only thing left to just check off before it gets in, let's all quickly go what, what do you do? Are you wearing? That's where you discovered a twist in the tail. Yeah.

You absolute weasel are all wearing the same teodorant. We've got a cent for free months ago. And he goes, well, I'm using the free rex soda. Then Jack goes, oh, I'm, I mean, you're exactly where this was going. I'm using the free rex soda. The stash I haven't sold. Yeah. Definitely.

That was from Jack. Then last walked in and goes, oh, why are you holding up that? Yeah, I'm still using that. Directly. Mark's like, oh, no, I use the free, I use, oh, no, it is the same. But he's the only difference. You guys are using the roll on black or you gray. I'm gray.

The other two are roll on black. It's the same recsonant of sport. Yeah, they've got 92 hour protection or 48 hour protection I think. Running on the edge. We're 96 hour protection. We've got 96 hour protection. Yeah, extra for you.

Is this smell different? I mean, will we give it to him if he says Brexit's a sport? I have to. Yes, I have to. Brexit's a sport. So he's going to be four Brexit's sport. What do you think?

Well, I didn't know that you guys were all going to be exactly the same to you, Odor. And so I thought it was going to be pretty normal. Yeah. So I went and got Nivu women's and sprayed it on me. Because I was going to be the red hair egg. I was going to be the trick. Well, it's a thing. So now we've got two tricks. Now for him to get it going, because I was going to be the red hair egg. I was going to be the trick.

So now we've got two tricks. Now for him to get it going, he has the balls to go. That's four. Let's go four out of five. We'll chat to him about it. But let's make sure I'm first your second. Yep. So at least he doesn't smell the same thing again. And then he's going to smell the same thing three times the right.

If he is the guts, he's just actually... Can I tell you, the reason I have Nivia women is because I like to buy a car can of deodorant, just keep it like in the side. Yeah, yeah. And usually I don't mind going Nivia. This is the black, white t-shirt one. Yep, so it's nice from Andy. It is a powerful smell in here.

I was in a rush the other day. I was only buying a pack of Oreos. And you know what, the supermarket, there must be something else I need. Yes. Got the Oreos. You really love Oreos at the moment. I feel like that's the third time it's come up in the last few weeks. If they so choose to recognize my little team.

No, let's just call it a well known. It's two months time wewing and miskeating competition. We're like, oh, I'm sure it's not. Sorry, I've been smearing the Oreos on my body. I was choosing a well-loved two-biscuit, one-cream-layered favorite, whatever they may be. But anyway, I was just doing that thing of like, you're like, this is a waste of a suit market.

Waste of a... And so I got what I quickly grabbed it, but that black and white can, the difference between the traditionally male scent and the female one is, again, it's like the public towards that I fell for the other day. The males are t-shirt. The female is the slightest pin chin. It's a mental look like a threat.

Take a seat in color, can. Same color, can. Same color, everything. The black and white. I grabbed it quickly. I sprayed it on. I didn't even notice. That night I'm watching TV was on the couch. He starts going, how can I smell another woman? And I go, what? She's like, I can smell, you smell like a woman.

I don't know, I don't. And she's like sniffing my shoulders up. I'm like, I got no idea what you're talking to. She's like, what did you do? I was like, honey, literally picked the kids up from school, took Sunny Vijitsu, had sex with a friend. So I'd hook up. So I'd hook up.

Insistered she put Modo in on, I actually got it. I was like, that's it. And then I was like, what it can then was like, well maybe there's a parent spent at Jiu Jitsu that's quite cramped. I might have been sitting next to a well, I normally said a parent spent at GJT here that's quite cramped. I might have been sitting next to a well, I normally said, you know, I've got Kim, I've got Dee Dee. I was like, Dee Dee, who's one of the kids grandmas, she might have had a heavy load on that's

scung to me, couldn't figure it out till I went the next day to the car. And then I, since I was like, this is why I smell like a woman, I've accidentally bought women's do, which is like, that's exactly what you would say though. With 24 hours to think about it. So now I'm wearing it again. You really, really get it out there that I do have a count of it for a funny reason. And telling everybody publicly to really be able to double down on the line. He wouldn't have made that up if he really did it. Hey, bad news for you, but good news that for Zoe, you aren't cheating.

We have to Zoe get to, and again, no, it's exactly the kind of thing you would say if you didn't want to be caught as many don't. We have, that's a long preamble to what we've just discussed because we've got John standing outside. We're going to take him into a different studio to, one with the highest feelings, and we can put our... But it eliminates any residual waft that's in here. And we'll get straight into this. 4 out of 5, we it games self-according. Creepy thing, just a skill that lives in him. Cautioners every single brand, a deodorant detection man.

So let's pause this song. And test John. Hey John, how you going? Yeah, good mate. How you going? You're good mate. How you going? You're in the arena now. You feel like you've got the skill ready to go. Rare any go, Matt?

Rare any go. Just off-micons we walked in, I said, how's the nose feel? And you said it's a little bit blocked for that. It's a bit blocked, yeah. Not ideal conditions, but we'll see how we go, eh? We've just come out of a pressurized tube, obviously flying across to Melbourne on the cheapest available flight for that lead. How did it go on the cheapest available flight for that flight.

How did it go on the flight? Did the flight help it? Did it not help it? It didn't help, but made. I'll take any excuse I can get. Yeah. Don, we had a question as to how you discovered the trait because obviously with through physio, you are in and around a lot of armpits.

Yeah. But there would have to be a follow up question, which is, oh, what are you wearing today? Yeah, well, it's got me in trouble before. So I'm a sweaty bloke myself. So I use my fair share of deodorant. And, yeah, one day this bloke came in and they load up with the deodorant before he comes in. That's nice of him.

Try to protect the braille and stuff. But he just stung every single sport. Right. And they, like, good one, good one, go for it. And he got a bit offended, so I don't pull that out anymore. So you just get the familiar sense, you know. So it's more on your side of things, you're going through an array of different deodorants

and you'll recognize it on people rather than you've got an extra form at the clinic that goes and by the way, what deodorant do you think? Yeah, we haven't added that on yet. Yeah, yeah. Medicare number and just know of know what he's praying under there. Okay, so you knew Rex, so does sport. Rex, so does sport. Is that a killer one?

Oh, I think it's one of the things that I've seen. I've seen golf, shelf space, definitely. Yeah, okay. All right. Nice. Well, I've done you a favor. The do you know and I'm rocking at the moment is like a roll on that I bought a few months ago overseas. So I was like, so I'm not wearing that today. I thought I'd change that a bit.

Because I was like, if he gets, this is, you know, Viva la sweet pits or something like the france, then that would be tough. So we've gone to a local brand today Sweet Pits or something like that. Yes. Then that'll be tough. So we've gone to a local brand today. This is available at Coles. Fantastic. All the way. Five of us here, four out of five.

Yep, get yourself a coin, my friend. Beautiful. Do you have a preferred left or right arm to sniff? I like the right area. OK. Well, you have to go. Have a favorite. Can I check one thing?

Yeah. Is everyone wearing deodorant here? Not gonna get a YBLO, am I? No, that's good for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're all wearing deodorant. No, just kidding, we've all just come out of a grappling session.

Yeah. Okay, I'm first pit. Beautiful. Stand up and take that in. Pit your skills against standing. Pit's right in there. Get's right. You gotta get in there.

Just smells like when he blows, mate. and repeat your skills against Andy's. It's right in there. It's right. You gotta get in there. Just smells like when he blows, mate. LAUGHTER He does often tuck one under his armpit if he sees his mum coming. LAUGHTER Never spoke to him. It's a familiar scent. A reckon it's in the rexona varieties.

Gone original. Incorrect. Yeah, it's important. Exona sport. But love that you could pick the vineyard, even not the specific one. It's not the varietal. That's rough.

I mean, do I put you off with my pretending not to know Rick so to sport, William? Yeah, you did. You did. We'll have to review that for a game play. All right, take that out of contention. OK. John's now moving into Hamish's pit.

I have that, yep. I'm not going to worry. Hamish is lifting. It's right in there. Ooh, I reckon that's a Nibbio. Very nice. Gone black and white. Yes. Yes.

Oh, yeah. Maybe it's Nibbio black and white. It's the woman's. The woman's. He's the... OK, he levels it up. Well done. Not the Simska.

Not the Simska. That was really nice. Under D What was it? Rexona sport. Yeah. Oh, I got on the shovel. Yes. We did ask everyone to just wear the doughnut and they normally wear in.

There's a long, long backstory to my Nivea women's, but you can listen to the episode. Let's go to Mike. Okay, let's go to Mike. Okay, let's go to Mike. That wasn't a deliberate stitch up. Yeah. I'm left handed, so I'd prefer you to sniff left here. That is fine.

Just raise your right, mate. You can still lift your right arm. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Noisker, Forest Fresh. Wonderful choice. Seems a bit right left, is it? Incorrect. Oh yeah. Raksana sport. Oh, God, what? So when he said it didn't smell familiar,

you just smelled it. Yeah. Sure. So, one, two, three, four, five, one. Hello, John. Hello, Jack. Anyone else here before we get to Jack, did anyone else have one round when there were a tenage that where you went

Norska? I remember doing that wrong. I'm not bra, it makes could be my new spill. And then back to the original. I've never sniffed it to the honest. Yeah, yeah. You just went for the howl Mary. Yeah, absolutely howl Mary. It's when you feel like being a little I don't know, Scandinavian, like, change it up a bit in your tense,. Let's go back to the original. Jack's lifting his hands. You may, Snipps, come on in. It's a good size, Snipp.

Shh. I reckon that's a nivvy of her idea as well. Mm-hmm. We're gonna go... Oh. It's a terrible poker face. I don't think it's nivvy. It's, uh, it's another Rex-Hon give it. It's another rexona sport.

Another rexona sport. Oh no. We took a gamble here, John, because it turns out through no organizing that fall out of the five men in here, because we got sent rexona sport for freerlier in the year. Everyone was still using the weasel fact, yes. So rather than illegally. I'm excited to support for Freerlier in the year. Everyone was still using the weasel stat. Yes. So rather than illegally...

But I would say that's easier, because you've gone from smelling the same deodorant three times in a row, and this did three different things. Is that, is that what we're hearing then, is when it hits the body, your own BO changes the scent. It does. They like oil and water. They can't mix. They just create this new thing.

I'm happy to use that as an excuse. Absolutely. More than that. It must be the case. The people that were excited with know this, the other reason I mentioned that it wasn't a stitch up John because I don't know when you're thinking, oh, they've tried to trick me.

We decided to play honestly with everyone wearing what they honestly wore in. Thought it could have gone your way with you just going guys. I don't know what you're doing, but this is just all Rex on a sport that is did seem to rattle you. It felt too basic to go everything Rex on a sport. Even after you're here, free of the four people.

I would say a bit more. I would say a bit more. We've become increasingly harder. Well, you know, for one excuse, that it could be that, because you started really well, straight away with Andy, you knew Rexona. Maybe Rexona gets in your nose and sits down in there inside the nostrils,

and then when you smell another Rexona, it's not really lighting up the alarms. Oh, and you should set an alarm. Like a garbo, who's like, I don't, I don't smell it anymore. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You just used to smell it. Yeah. It's amazing coffee beans in between, what if that's right, I don't, I don't smell it anymore. Yeah. Because you just used to the smell. Yeah. The smell is some ocean coffee beans in between would have been.

I think that's right. I think that's what happened. We, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, understand it's quite a late flight out. It is, yeah, got a bit of time to get out. I have a go to the supermarket, there's a reason. It's a wreck's on a sport. Fellas' quick crop update, as we try to earn a Nobel Peace Prize, potentially heading up North to Darwin Darwin to see whether we can get the owner of a spectacular jumping crock tours and the owner of the original jumping crock tours

together, standard olive branch smoker piece pipe, shake hands. And I think you suggested how they have to give each other a compliment. I... I just think that would be a nice... I don't know if that happens in official piece negotiations. I wasn't there at the end of the Korean War when the armistice was signed, and I don't know if they did the compliments, but I just think it would be a nice addition to modern times piece negotiations.

To go, well, this just shows how much there is piece. I think you should be able to compliment your former adversary. Got sent in some audio from someone that surreptitiously recorded a conversation asking one of the guys up at Spectacular. I'm not sure if he's staff or he's been there, he's ex- staff or anything. We can't use that audio. I've been told by the lawyers because permission wasn't granted when we've recorded someone and you cannot air something if you don't have permission. Yes.

Unless we obtained a wiretap permit, did we do that? No, we did not. Yep, because I don't remember doing it. So then what I've done is I've transcribed it and got it reenacted, which I've heard other legal podcast, crime podcasts do. Was this on the advice of the loser? Now we're just doing things we heard on other podcasts.

For the latter. I'm willing to sign off on that. Jack, are you? Yes, no. Oh, good. I'll double sign off. Double sign off, that's pretty good to me. I think the illegal, again, more thinking than actually knowing, think the illegal thing

is recording someone. So they're identifiable. And also you just can't record someone's conversation without them knowing it's a valid act. But we are saying that has happened. But we didn't do that. Yep. Yeah, yeah, no, it's a shame. We agree that it's a shame it happened. Such a shame. So we have our official stance is that's a shame that happened. So we

agree with the law there by the shaking of our head. Since it has happened, you know, be ashamed to waste it. That will be our defeat. We thought it was ashamed to waste. Well, what's, you know, be ashamed of wasted. We ashamed of wasted. And that will be our defense. Yeah, we thought it was ashamed of wasted. It was due to the way we were born, aren't we? You don't throw a good audio recording in the bin. It's, it's a shame to waste it. Yes, it'd be ashamed of wasted. So there's two snippets.

It was long. It was a long conversation. There's two snippets that I want because we did put the call out for, how deep does this go? What kind of geneticans happened? Because we hear things got a bit unsavory. The first one is commenting for something which is like 40 years ago. It's a long time ago. This is when the original was up against, I think we mentioned this before, another mob in a different river in Tiley. Yep. Have a listen, I think Tony who's the owner of the original is the person they're talking about here. Yeah, yeah, so the one that's called the original is not the first.

But the first one is not here anymore? Well, it's not here anymore because they had a fire that burned down all their premises and apparently the bloke who runs the original saw it from the other side of the river Well, it's not here anymore because they had a fire that burned down all their premises and apparently the bloke who runs the original saw it from the other side of the river but decided not to call the fireies because he thought it would take too long to get there. So what's the point? Oh, wow. And apparently a few weeks after that one of his boats had a bunch of bullet holes in it.

Oh no. So four decades passed. Wow, we passed. We know know that's escalated. That's escalated, but we know up north back then. Back then, it was a bit like the Wild West. Obviously, that was back when they first started out these clock tours. It's got a stress long, long time ago. Stress received. Then...

Yeah, no, I'm just, just, just, G-Pullet holes is just, you know, what an ever since the dawn of the gun and the bullet. Such an, such an effective way to send an message. I'm not supporting it, I'm not condoning it, but I'm just saying, just, just no two ways about it. You do read that one loud, it's clear.

Breakthrough the window with a note attached is also another one. One of the classics. One of the classics. Again, this is from Spectacular Side and the person who sent us this audio through the window with a noted touches also with another one. One of the classics. Again, this is from Spectacular side and the person who sent us this audio was inquiring about how the bridge between the two of them, how did they get their territory established?

How did it become known as this North Bridge, is Spectacular, South, the bridge is original. So like going back like decades, some tours from spectacular would head down towards original and they would come up this way as well. Definitely heard stories of some unsafe driving and close calls between boats. It got a bit out of hand so it would have been parks and wildlife for the National Maritime Authority who stepped in and said, you know, if you two aren't going to sort your shit out then you're going to have to stop the tours altogether. Why?

You know, stop putting people's lives at risk. And ever since then they've gone that way and we've gone this way and the conflict's halted. How bad did it get? Well, an old made-of-mind was running a spectacular tour that side-swapped an original boat because they're on our turf. Both boats were full of passengers and yeah, that wasn't great. Okay. It's like the body time won straight out there. It's a hotly contested piece of international water.

Again, that went into two decades ago. Again, it's hearsay and it's a long time ago, but it does help paint a picture. This is why I think it's ripe for a piece process. Don't you guys? Because now you would assume the people involved in those, that sounds like heads were running pretty hot in the 80s. And I can't believe this. How excited would you be on that tour

where you're in Crockenfist of Waters, you've seen them jumping out of the air and just eating jams all, and they're on the boat coming' Festive Waters, you've seen them jumping out of the air and just eating just all. And they're on the boat coming side swipes, yeah. Whew, hoo. You'd be like, well, at least, you'd probably be thinking like, would the Crocks be satisfied with the chicken?

Like, are they full? Or is that an Andre? Or if they now got a hunger up? Good thing, yeah. It says like, thankfully everyone stayed inside the boat, but it's swiping. But it says like this is, this is what's going to 80s and 90s.

And as often happens, it's like how like families in towns have issues with each other. And the kids are like, well, we don't know it's come from, but it's like the grandparents had issues back in the day. So another part of the audio, and I should stress this, because I picked out some of the juicy parts. He said it did have a reputation of being the wild west back then, He must stress it's nothing like that now, which we all agree. That's no bumping. No bumpings happen for 40 years, but that's why it needs to be resolved through some kind

of piece. It just sounds like there's a band-aid put over an old wound and never got air there. I think if we had the right peace team and I'm looking at us three, travel north, go look, we think we've heard the facts, we've heard the evidence, sit down, we smooth things over, calm waters, two compliments are exchanged, the plaque goes up. I just think peace in the north would make the country happy too. Are we in a position do you think now to reach out to the two owners to see if they're interested or we're just going to go. Yeah, we can't force peace upon people. No.

You do need buy-in from the parties. Okay. Well, that's our next step then. Yeah, well, you don't think so? I think I agree. I think we're- It just sounds disappointed. No, I think so disappointed that I was- No, no, no, I was impentious. I'm sorry.

Yeah, my emotions are running high and I don't know which one to choose. I was pensive and in total agreement, I feel like an next step is to reach out to them and see if they're interested. And then maybe schedule a little bit of a trip up there. What if they were going to be wanting to listen to, they could be something they need, you know? That could be part of,

that could be what we're doing here, middle manning a bit. Lovely. Yeah, great. And, oh, and Jack, you're familiar with a DNR as in a do not resuscitate. Oh, right. If you have a DNR on you, like, yes, if you're going to have a bracelet or whatever, it's really like resuscitate. Don't bring me back. Not interested.

Right. So that's in at the, at the end of it all closer to the end, you just, like, you kind of, I think I think I've fun now just like, you can't have it. I think I've kind of fun now. Yeah, you can, you can. Yeah, some people, you can have a, you can have a, you can make the request now. Just to be like, I don't want to be just in case you get brought back in your brain dead or whatever.

Right. Right. But like, say if I get pulled in from the, the surf, you can have a dinner because you'd be like, I don't want to run the risk of coming because you, if you, if you get resuscitated and it's been like five minutes, then you could be like, I don't want to run the risk of coming. Because if you get resuscitated and it's been like five minutes, then you could be alive but brained. Anyway, it's probably a bit grim to what we're talking about. I know, but I just feel like there's certain times I'd like the,

what was it? resuscitated me sometimes. You're on my list of reasons. What's the core of the resuscitation? Get the tattoo on your stomach. Okay, hang on just quickly reading here, sir. Yeah, yeah, it's actually, actually, since we can't resusc't, how long's it been?

45 minutes. It's a very long document. A DNR. No, maybe it's more of a hospital thing too. I think maybe that because definitely would've been resuscitated. Just for you guys, and we can say it's publicly I'd love to be resuscitated if I'm coming in from the...

Oh, yes, me too, especially in the first 45 seconds. Yeah, absolutely. Love that. But yeah, at the hospital from my old guys just pulled the plug on me. Absolutely, that's actually what I'm looking for. Well, pull the plug is different than that. Is murder.

That was like, that was my, look what I told you, my dad said that to me on. So he goes mate, if I get, if I've gone, right? You just take me down to the end of St. Kilda Pier. Yeah, in my wheelchair, put a bag of smettin' mullap, you tip me in when, right, well, I'm not doing that bag

because that's murder in broad daylight. So you're getting me sent to jail. Plus, if I put a bag of smett, I put a bag of smett on your lap and I tip you in. The smett will fall off and you'll rise back up to the top. I can tie it to you and push you in backwards for more of a chance. Now we're talking.

Yeah, yeah. It's good kid. It's fine. This is why I wanted to bring it up. Anyway, so not actually here to talk about murder. What I do want to mention was I would love to introduce. No, I know it wasn't. I didn't get an immediate response for you guys on the DNR, but I'd love to introduce

another DNR. I feel. wasn't, it didn't get an immediate response for you guys in the DNR. But I'd love to introduce another DNR that you can have somehow put on your file or your digital file does not review. I want to be known. Wouldn't it be amazing if you could get, so it's just known, across all platforms, emails, this guy doesn't review things, so don't ask him. Because now, what is going on with every time you have any interaction with any company, they're like, how'd you go? Like, it was fine. I was a customer.

Like Australia Post everywhere. I'm not singling on Australia Post every company. They're like, hey, how was your package delivery? It's like, yeah, fine. Got it. You guys delivered it. You charged a fee. I assumed to the senders.

And I got it. You said you would do it. Yeah, did what you said you'd do. Yeah. The level of surprise in the package. Sure. And then I said, how was it? I'm like, I was pretty happy with that little extra you did. Yeah, but if it's just a normal letter, how do you even get that five out of five stars? What are you, what is you send a letter in the. You've been doing it for hundreds of years to like gold fields and war zones like I actually think this was an easy one Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I have a box out the front of my house with the number on it Yeah, and that's where your guy put it like it wasn't amazing. It was pretty easy

Even like the most mundane objects now you'll get the email afterwards Or you'll be and then I often get the one where it's like, a month later, they're like, hey, like in those socks, and you don't respond, and then they'll be like, hey, you know, it's not too late to review those socks. Good, yeah, well, obviously after 60 days, why are there so important areas?

I reckon it, I think it's, I think it's because for a lot of online shopping now, it's like, it's like gaming, it's like gaming the system to be like, if we have tons of far-sorry views, it'll sell well. So, but just everything, like, stay on the line, do the, I'm just like, I'm not doing any of it. I'm not, I don't work for you. If you gave me free, if you gave me twice the amount of socks, like market research, if it was free pizza, yeah, 15 bucks an hour hour and a can of code.

That's how it used to happen, Andy. That was how me and Andy, that was our favorite way of making money. You got 15 bucks to sit in a room and get very passionate about whatever they wanted to do. You can't just woof as much pizza as you like. God damn right, we love this brand. This is the best window cleaner I've been got in the market.

I just, I just, I just, I've got the market. Although the purple is a bit dark. And we would just go wild without a pin. And that's what you used to have to do. And now they're probably don't they don't do market research. You just send you the mouth free. I hate to say this and there there is a worst offender in my in the in the things I use. You're not going to love it because it's something we both love. Knock off. Knock off. It's, it's the meter. Oh, really? The digital thermometer you gave me, this is a, and I gave me this as a present. And I'm so surprised I hadn't seen this online because I really thought I'd bought everything. But it's a Bluetooth, it's like a meat thermometer.

So you stick it in like, you know, Oh, yes, yes, on a chop, or a leg lamp, or I use it all the time for steaks. Yeah, chicken's great. Put in the oven and it's not only obviously like to text the internal temperature and the external temperature, but it sends it to an app on your phone

and it will tell you like when your meat is exactly like, you know, 58 degrees. So they're like, take it out the oven. Can't get raw. It's like, take the degrees so they're like take it out the other. Yeah and like take the steak out now, take the chicken out now, let it rest, it's your resting time yeah and so when I cook for my family and particularly beck's family I'll take care of the meat and all I do is stick this thing and and the app goes take it out and rest it I'm like great and then they go oh well cooked any like it's it sounds great but I think you guys are both accidentally doing a review for it right

now. This is the way I'd rather do it. No, this is the way I'd rather do it. Talk into friends. That's the old way of reviewing it. Not having any other thing. They tested me for a review for a while and I was like, turn this. How do I get this off?

This off, right? Then, because I think you must, I think you have with them, they have my email address. So I must have had to register to start using it Not only that though, and oh, but because they now know what you're up to when you cook things I'm getting emails the next morning going how's that steak yesterday? Out of my house This was a one-off transaction. They're like hey, you didn't review it. You didn't rate it. Good, bad, what we told you. I was like, I'll leave the judge. That is between me and the me. You're just the little metal stick that tells me when to take it out. You're not,

you're not, you're not the chef. You're not the, you're not the, you're not doing this together. You're a tool. Like, it is wild. The level, this is big data, man. This is big data. This is how they get you. Okay, by the way. At Wine Cave. But it really, I can't even think of an example that will seem too silly. No.

Like you buy a shovel or something from Bunnings and like they will now just be like, how's those holes? Like you dig and well. It was a deep enough. Good, good load. Carry the load. Nice, how's the shaft?

What's up? Come on in. But I would say this, carried a load. Nice, how's the shaft? What's, what's up? Come on in. But I would say this, thank you to all the people who do review, because I won't buy anything without looking at the reviews first. I'm going to foreign house stars. next week. Catch up or contribute at www.hamishanandy.com