Handsome - Anjelah Johnson-Reyes asks about gratitude and "mad-itude"

Episode Date: May 27, 2025

The hilarious stand up comedian Anjelah Johnson-Reyes (Mad TV, Netflix) asks the Handsome hosts what makes them grateful, but most importantly what makes them steaming *mad*! Plus Fortune's incredible gift card story, a walrus joke for the ages, and a whole lotta good Handsome vibes!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTubeThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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And Fortune Veemster. Welcome. Welcome. May I take your order? Yes, please. Where are you right now, Fortune? I am filming a movie in Atlanta. Oh, nice. With Will Ferrell.

Cool. How's it going? I just got here last night, so so far nothing's happened till my lovely call time at 5.30 tomorrow morning. Do you know your lines? I will tonight. Is that how you do your lines? Do you do it the night before or do you do it in the makeup chair or do you work up slowly?

Tell us your process. Please tell us your process. On a movie like this where it's not like crazy, big chunks of lines, I'll look like two days ahead and see like if there's anything that I really need to dig into. And if it's not too bad, then I'll do it the day before, the night before, and then again in the makeup trailer.

But on FUBAR, I had like really long, like really long things. So it would print out a thing for me for the week that I would be studying all week. Yeah, all your action terminology and. That's right. Well, we got the, we got the, oh, I actually can't think of anything. Yeah, we. Well, we got the, oh, I actually can't think of anything.

Yeah, we got the, we got the. We got the, we're zooming in on the. The thing. Truth be told, I can't tell you one line that I had this past season. Because it's all short-term memory. I learn it really quickly and then release it as soon as the scene's done.

Yeah, same, same. My dream if I was working with Will Ferrell would be, because his bloopers are so iconic, my dream would be to be part of a blooper, like part of an unscripted moment where I make him laugh or something. Where do you see Will Ferrell's bloopers if you haven't worked with him?

Let me tell you, it's when I'm sad, I get on YouTube and I will search literally Will Ferrell bloopers. Oh, okay. He is so funny. I did his last movie with him, but my big scenes with him and Reese got cut. Oh man.

But it was so fun. This is them making it up to you? I guess so. And then, but we had a funny behind, they did some behind the scenes videos where he and I was, they were interviewing me and then he comes up and interrupts me and starts doing bits with me, which is like my dream. And then Reese comes up and does bits with the both of us and I'm doing bits with Will and Reese Witherspoon and I don't know where this footage is. I've not seen it anywhere.

And I'm like, I would. Maybe it never happened. No, I know it did. And we were all doing bits. I'm like, this is a dream scenario for me. But I have no idea where that footage went. Yeah, you need that. Track that down.

And so is this movie, are you and Will, are you the two stars of the movie? No, I am another small part in this. It's him and Zac Efron and Regina Hall. They're the main ones. And what is your character? I play a cop, obviously. Obviously.

Have you played a cop? I'm a CIA agent in Food Bar. This might be my first cop role. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I'm trying to think. Yeah. Are you going far out of the fortune personality? Are you doing some character?

It's just fortune in a... It's fortune as a cop. Yeah, fortune the cop. All right. Fortune the cop. I went on set today and had my fitting for my cop outfit and I said, I am playing a sexy cop, right? And they were like, obviously.

And did you feel pretty gay? Yeah, pretty gay. What, just because of the uniform? I mean, I fit in a cop uniform. I have to say it ramped up my homosexuality. Oh, did it? Yeah, when I glanced at myself, I was like, this is pretty gay.

At first they put the hat on you that's like the folded one. Cop hat, and I looked so stupid. I was like, this is stupid. And then they put like a ball cap on me. I was like, oh, that's way better. Okay. Can we see the picture of you in the stupid hat? I didn't take a picture of it.

Can you put it back on your head and take a picture and send it to us? I'm imagining it really clearly. A little, but I think in my mind it's pretty cute. It's like a little page boy kind of. It was funny. I was talking with Will and we were just chatting away and he was in his costume and then all of a sudden,

I think I was a good 10 minutes into talking with him when I looked down and he's in spandex and I had no clue. And was that sexy or was it funny? Beyond sexy. Okay. How are you doing Tig? What's going on with you? What is going on with me?

Speaking of sexy. Yes, speaking of sexy, I feel like I've been up to something and doing things for sure. That's riveting. I mean, we're pretty neck deep always in baseball at our house and outside of the house and base. Stats and games. Games, a lot of practices, a lot of games,

a lot of double headers. Did you have a Mother's Day celebration of any sorts? We did, we had a Mother's Day celebration of any sorts? We did, we had a Mother's Day celebration. We went to one of our favorite vegan restaurants and it disappointed. Ooh. No. Scandal, wow. It was such a bummer.

It was the fourth or fifth time we've gone to this particular vegan restaurant that is very nice. Yeah. It is one of the top vegan restaurants. Oh wow. Every time it is the worst service. I wonder if it's the place I've been to

that wouldn't accept my gift card. I'm not gonna name the place. Okay, I'll name the place and we're gonna bleep it, but it is. Okay. And it's in Marina Del Rey. And yeah, so Max and Finn, it's just a bummer because it's like, you're looking forward to it.

It's your big special day. The kids are excited to take you out. They're paying? And everyone get, huh? Are they paying? Are they paying? Yeah. They're so much not paying that anytime money comes up, they always tell you how broke they are.

Oh, that's so good. They're like, can I have your debit card? They're like, I am stretched thin right now. Truly. They're like, we are broke. The bills are due. Yeah. Wait Tig, if the restaurants,

it's had bad service for the past four times. Yeah. So what were you expecting? The food's probably really good, right? The food is so good and we have such high hopes that it's just a freak experience. And this time the waiter was like, at the end, at the end of the day, at the end of the meal, when he's giving us our,

or when we're finally, after we were finally able to track him down, he's like, hey, and sorry, you know, things are really busy today, and it's like, it's Mother's Day, wouldn't they be on top of that, that it's gonna be busy, but also for the four other times we've gone, what was the excuse there? Yeah, they're like, sorry, it's-

We'll bring more napkins, never came, we'll do this, we'll do that. And it's just, it's like, whatever, there's much bigger problems in the world. I don't think so. Well, in the moment, we think there's not, but I feel like Stephanie and I are very, we're nice to wait staff, we tip well, we're patient, we're understanding.

I worked in the restaurant world for many years, so there's a lot of leeway. This is endlessly bad service. You can't find them. They don't refresh your drinks. You can't find them to pay the bill. It's just all the wrong food. It's like, it's endless. So that's how our Mother's Day was.

But we walked around and looked at the water and just watched a movie and lounged around, had a relaxing day. Max and Finn were playing catch in the backyard, which is one of my favorite. I mean, Finn's so good at pitching and Max is so good at catching. And to see them in the backyard just- Satisfying. catching and to see them in the backyard just satisfying. It is so, it makes it so much more yin and yang. Just brothers. Just, just it was. Yeah. So aside from the actual brunch that we were all building up, it, you know what it actually did?

It made me feel bad for people who are taking their mothers out and let's say somebody's sick or their mother's very elderly. Maybe that will be your last mother's day or something. It's like, I don't mean to take it to a really depressing place, but like, but I did think about that. Or somebody coming in town, you know what I mean? It's like-

A special meal. For sure, and I think about it as a comedian. When I go and do a show, I don't take it for granted. I know people get babysitters. I know they maybe paid for an Uber to get there. So I don't know, that's where my head was. Was like, give it your 100%. Right. Did I tell you about my experience at the one nice vegan restaurant with my gift card?

I'll tell it. Really quick. But it was it's one of the nice vegan places and my agents had given me like a very expensive gift card to it. Tell us the name and we'll bleep it out. Um, bleep this part out too, because I don't remember the name. It's on. Okay. That's the name of it. Yeah. We'll bleep that out. But I was like, I'm not a vegan, obviously.

I like vegan food, but this is like a very expensive gift card. So I'm like, I got to use this for a special occasion. So I invited my friend, Jillian Bell, who we know, who's been on our handsome pod. And it was her birthday and she loved this restaurant. But for whatever reason, I didn't want to tell her. Is she vegan? She's not vegan, but she and her sister Brianna

love this restaurant. And I don't know why, because we've been best friends for years, why I didn't want to tell her I was using a gift card. So when the bill came, uh, Jack's like got up and, and just kind of, um, was going to the bathroom and just handed, uh, the lady, the check with the gift card. And, you know, kind of trying to be discreet. And then the woman like comes over and says gift card

more than anyone I've ever heard in my life. She's like, I tried to run the gift card, but the gift card won't work. And I don't know what, have you used this gift card before? Like, how much is on the gift card? Oh, and Julie's looking at me like, what? I'm like, ah, whatever.

You know, we take you at the funniest part is you were sitting behind me. We ran into you you guys that night. This was probably, yeah, this was like six years, five years ago, something like that. You were literally right behind me. You were literally right behind me, so I was even more embarrassed to like talk about this gift card.

That's so funny. And so I'm just like, no, never used this before. Just, you know, just go run it. And Jillian's like, and I'm like like, nope, never used this before. Just, you know, you'll go, just go run it. And Jillian's like, and I'm like, I don't know. And so she comes back again. She's like, I'm on the phone with the gift card company, but like it's not going through. I don't know what's wrong with this gift card.

Like keep saying gift card. And I'm just like, please stop it. And so I'm just like, here, give me the gift card. Give me the gift card. And we just like hand her our credit card and pay for it. And so I'm just like, here, give me the gift card. Give me the gift card. And we just like hand her our credit card and pay for it. But it was- And they're like, oh, declined. It was wild.

And then as we're leaving the restaurant, the manager stops us. Sorry about the gift card. I don't know what was wrong with that gift card. We're trying to run the gift card. And I was, and you know, Jack's went back another time and it didn't work again. And I'm just like, this is a bamboozled gift card.

Okay, but how was the food? Really good, really good. Yeah. I feel like bumping into Tig at a vegan restaurant is it's like bumping into me at an escape room. Like it's so on brand. I know. It's almost embarrassing.

It's like, yep, of course I'm here. And apologies for my memory loss. It was a while ago. But did we talk? We talked. Yeah, yeah, we said I'm here. And apologies for my memory loss, but did we talk? We talked. Yeah, yeah, we said hi and you guys sat down. It was just me and Stephanie? I can't remember, y'all might've been with another couple. That's okay.

So like we just said a brief hello, hi, it wasn't like a long thing. But I just remember between not wanting to tell Jillian I had a gift card and you sitting behind me, I was like, please just give me the gift card. They get on the intercom, they're like, table 47, your gift card is still not going through. Fortune theme, sir, please.

But the funny part is because we had this expensive gift card, we were like, order whatever you want. Yeah, oh my God. Keep it coming, you want another drink. Two of those apps, we were just going nuts. Be glad you didn't have the gift card at the restaurant we went to on Mother's Day, because you can't keep it

coming, because they won't ever come to your table. That's right. When you were saying we couldn't find the waiter, I was like, surely that's the base. You shouldn't have to find, hide and seek the waiter. We could find him. He just wouldn't make eye contact when he was walking past our table.

And so we'd be like, hello. Or there's the classic thing in restaurants where they're like, you're like, hey, can I get some water? They're like, I'm going to send over your server. And then the server you try to order, they're like, I'm just taking the drinks. I'm going to send over the, you know. That's what was happening.

Oh, my God. They gave us the Mother's over the, you know. That's what was happening. Oh my God. They gave us the Mother's Day menu and then they gave us the regular menu. So we were finding things on the regular menu. And when we all had our orders and they finally came to the table, they were like, oh, we only have the prefix meal on the Mother's Day.

That regular menu is just for drinks. So then we were like, nobody told us. So they leave and then we have to finding some to eat with small children, too. It's not easy. So we had to go back through. Anyway, again, bigger problems going on. Again, I don't think so. But you asked how Mother's Day was, and I am telling you, it was perfect. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First.

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Non-withdrawable casino spins valid for featured game only and expire in 168 hours. See terms at goldennuggetcasino.com slash promos. Ends at 11.59 p.m. Eastern on June 8th, 2025. I had my birthday. That's right. How did your birthday party go? Yeah, we haven't all been together since then. Thomas was there and... Crunk. Crunk. I mean, making a scene.

We had to kick him out. So it was set the scene. It was at your house. Okay, it was at my house. And the mistake I made was, it was like a last minute thing I thought, I gotta do something. And so I'd made an invite and on the invite, it said like, come for games, intrigue, mystery,

and like, what was it? And like lies or something. Like it was, oh, subterfuge, subterfuge. Like I would promise. I would think that this is a sexy party. No, no. That's what I would think. Intrigued. I'm intrigued. Really? Yeah.

Well, what I wanted was like I had big plans that I was going to do an Easter egg hunt. I was going to do like some kind of mafia game where you have to figure out who at the party is. But I kind of panicked. I left it too late. I was I was really I got the birthday blues in the morning. And then people start- Oh no, did you have snacks? I had some snacks.

Oh, this sounds like an awful party. No, wait. Wait, you woke up the next day depressed? No, on the day. Oh, on the day, okay. But if you're inviting people to your house, you have to have a lot of snacks. Oh, I had snacks, I had snacks.

Oh, okay, okay. That's why I said- Did you have a lot of snacks though? Yeah, I had a lot of snacks. Oh, I had snacks. Oh, okay, okay. That's why I said. Did you have a lot of snacks though? Yeah, I had a lot of snacks. I don't know, I'm not sold on, you had a lot of snacks. What were the snacks? Walk us through it. Oh, okay, well I had multiple pizzas.

Oh, okay. Chips and bowls, I had dips, you know? Okay, okay. Chips and bowls and dips. Was there a cake or of any of the dessert? There was a cake. Okay, I'm bowls and dips. Was there a cake or of any of the dessert? Okay, I'm just making sure. The like stressful thing was that I put on the invite

2 p.m. onwards, which is a weird thing to do on a Friday. Oh, you know, you have to have a finite get out of my house time. 2 p.m., but then I got so like bummed and overwhelmed in the morning and like stressed trying to plan all these games, I promise, that then I texted everyone and said, let's do 3pm, which is such a weirdly thing to just bump it an hour in the afternoon. And then people come and I couldn't like settle into a conversation because I was so aware I'd promised games. So the only thing I really came up with was throw the teabag

in the cup from the furthest distance. And I think it's fair to say I was manic Thomas. I was running between groups of people who were just having a nice time being like, guys, we're throwing a teabag into a cup. If anyone wants to. How many people made it to the party? There were about 30 over the course of the afternoon. You stressed yourself out.

Did I ever. I mean, I had little bowls of paper and pens. I was trying to write secret missions for people and everyone was like, what is this? And then throwing the teabag in the cup, it was who can throw it from the furthest distance? And we're taking turns. And then thankfully that did get pretty electric.

And the feeling when someone finally got it in was like, we'd won the world cup. The teabag part? Yeah, the teabag part. Yeah, that was pretty good. Yeah, but overall- Did they get a prize? Like, did you make out with them?

No, no prize, no. And is this a game that- Intrigue, it seems like something needed to happen. The intrigue was just, is Meg gonna have a meltdown? Okay. Yeah. Now, is the throw a teabag in a glass or cup, Is that a typical party game? Because I have to be honest, I don't know if that would lure me to a party or keep me there. It was interesting. I was thinking why fortune if you knew you could throw a tea bag into a cup, you would haul ass over there? I'll try.

What I thought was there's a lot of ways you could go about it, because you're trying to get it from the furthest distance. I didn't anticipate how hard it would be to get it in at all, but there's different, you could get the teabag wet. That would be my, I would want to get it wet. Yeah.

And are you dangling it like this and throwing it? Well, that's a very interesting question to dangle from the screen. Thanks for the act out on that fortune. Or I was like, maybe if you just get high up over it, that counts as distance. It does. But honestly, thank God for,

Cleo Duvall and her wife were there and they're like game fanatics and they love Survivor and they were like right on board with it. Setting the rules and everything. Cleo would turn into a director again. like game fanatics and they love Survivor and they were like right on board with it. They were like, yep, okay. Setting the rules and everything. Cleo turned into a director again. She really did and she also, she was the one that got the teabag in the cup.

She did it. She did it. She did it. And how did Mr. Thomas do? Thomas, did you throw the teabag in the cup? You know, I think I was too busy playing foosball. I was really attached to that foosball table. Yeah, the table was good.

I once butt-dialed Clea DeVall out of nowhere during the middle of a romantic dinner in Santa Barbara. You did what? Butt-dialed. Butt-dialed Clea. That feels like the universe wanted you to connect with her. But it's not like, I love Clea, but I don't talk to Clea very often ever. Just chat on the phone? And my phone just called her and she texted me.

And could she hear what you were saying? She could totally hear her conversation. Oh my God. And she texted me like, hey bud, just that why you just called me. And I was like, oh my God, that is so weird. And that was just a general butt dial? General butt dial. So your phone could literally call anyone at any time,

just so you know. That's terrifying. Guess what my phone did? What? I not only, I didn't just do a butt dial, but I think we, Fortune and I, I don't know about May, but have a mutual friend, Kim Dickens. We do, yeah.

Okay, I butt FaceTimed Kim Dickens. Butt FaceTimed. Yeah, and I looked at my call list of recent calls looking for somebody's number one day. And Kim is a friend, but not somebody I talk to on a daily basis, and certainly, someone I have never FaceTimed with, and so I'm scrolling through my missed calls and whatever

to find a number that I needed to find, and I see that I have FaceTimed Kim Dickens like three days before, and I'm like, no, I didn't. She didn't say anything. She didn like, no, I didn't. She didn't say anything, she didn't pick up. We've never talked about it. I have done that before and I think usually people know if you don't normally FaceTime with that person

that it was like an accident. Okay. I'm still curious if I get a FaceTime. I'm like, what's going on? You answer. Yeah, yeah, but I answer spam too. I get a FaceTime. I'm like, what's going on? You answer. Yeah, yeah. But I answer spam too. I've ignored several FaceTimes that I know were probably an accident. I once went to block an ex's number.

This is years ago to prevent me from wanting to text them or whatever. Go to block it. And when I go to block the number, accidentally hit FaceTime. I just wanted to inform you. And when I go to block the number, accidentally hit FaceTime, I'm calling. So I just come in. I just wanted to inform you, I'm blocking you. Yeah. Opposite day. At the end of this call.

Yeah. Yeah, that is the nightmare. When you're not wanting them to know about them. I've not ever blocked somebody. They can't tell when you block them. They could if they tried to message, it would turn up green instead of blue. Oh Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was just from everybody says just block the person for a couple. Yeah, yeah guys I'm drinking this um thing that Thomas told me about what is it?

Prune juice fucked up. It's diet coke mixed with cold brew. Oh It's diet coke mixed with cold brew. Oh wow. That's a double whammy. It's diet coke with a splash of coffee in it. And it's kind of later there, right? Afternoon, great afternoon. Later where? It's like 3 p.m.

Oh, I'm thinking of where I am. It's evening time here. Oh yeah. How does that taste? And Thomas, you drink that? Yeah, Coke Zero, cause the Head Gum studios have cold brew on tap and I started having cold brew and Coke Zero combined just

because they have those available. And so that's an already made up idea? No I invented it like it's like cold brew with a splash of Coke Zero. Wow. And it's good? I like it. It's giving me a jolt that's for sure. I got a lot of Coke Zero. Wow. And it's good? I like it. It's given me a jolt, that's for sure. I got a lot of flack the other day for, I went to the movie theater to see Sinners, that movie. And I've ordered a large drink and then you fill up your drink. And so I always mix.

I mixed like ginger ale and Coke Zero and iced tea and Fanta lemon. I think that was the combo. And the person was horrified. There's a lot of drinks in one thing, but do you? I kind of like Thomas's theory that if things are available, you've got to mix them. Why not?

Speaking of lesbians on text, Emily Saylor's from the Indigo Girls just texted me. Do you think that was on purpose? Yeah, because high fortune. I had a Zoom with her today. She mentioned you in here. Yeah. Oh, she called you Tig Ol' Bitties, that's weird.

Does she not know my story? So May, would you say the birthday party was a success in the end? I think people had a nice time. I have many regrets. I would do an evening party next time, I think, or at least a weekend day, not a weekday. Not at 2 p.m. on a weekday?

Oh, it was on a weekday? It was on a Friday, yeah. Oh, okay. And I would plan better, And people came and then left and then came and then left. And like, I have the same birthday as Kumail Nanjiani and him and his wife came. Her birthday is, I think the day before the day after and they came, but everyone had just sort of left. And I felt, I was like, guys, I swear it was fun. We were throwing tea bags. And would you carry on teabag game tradition? Was it a success?

Was it a hit? Were they into it? I think now that you say it, I'm like, yeah, I don't, from now on it won't be a birthday unless there's a bad going on. So you're gonna be like, guys, guess what's on again this year? It's my birthday and we're throwing teabags.

Remember last year? What is funny? It would be funny if you named it the annual tea bag party. Yeah. Yeah. Well. Come on. Forza.

Well, I hate that I missed it. I was out of town. I don't know if I would have been invited, but I hate I missed it. I invited you both. I sent it on the group chat. Yeah, I sent it on the chat. You did?

I did, I sent it on the chat. You did? I did, I sent it on the chat, yeah. Oh, well I apologize. I totally did not see that, so my apologies for not getting back to you. I think birthdays as you get older, they're not. I've had a lot going on. Yeah, man, yeah. Have you?

Yeah, just a wee bit. Yeah. Guys, should we see who our question asker is? Absolutely. Today's question asker is an actress, standup comedian and former NFL cheerleader. She has released, I know right? She has released multiple hit standup specials

with her latest Say I Want getting over five million views on YouTube. Angela Johnson Reyes is today's question asker. All right, so I have a question for my handsomes. Okay. What are you grateful for in life, which you've already shared a few, but also what's your attitude,

which we didn't get to today. Okay. Your attitude is your one thing that's making you mad these days, getting's your attitude, which we didn't get to today. Your attitude is your one thing that's making you mad these days, getting on your nerves, and then your gratitude. What are you grateful for? That's my question for you guys.

All right. So I did Angela's podcast, and I was like, you gotta ask us a question for Handsome sometime, and she's like, I'll do it right now. I was like, oh, okay. Yes, great. And we're now. I was like, oh, okay. And we're on.

And we're on. So I got to be a part of Angela's question. I mean, I'm thinking of a million things. Gratitude and matitude. And explain matitude again, stuff that upsets you, right? Yeah. These days, like what specifically these days is really getting your goat. We get your, the fact that I don these days is really getting your goat. Mm, yeah, getting your, the fact that I don't have a goat gets my goat.

Yeah, you know what? Is that how a goat sounds? Or is that a sheep? What's a goat do? Don't answer her. Let her go about, let her go about life, thinking that's what a goat maybe

sounds like. Oh my gosh. You know what? Speaking of animals, when we were on mother's day, we saw a seal in the Marina and sitting up. I love his music. Fortune Marie. That is a solid joke. And I think you need to write that down

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frizzle and drizzle and get to cooking your next chef quality meal. So this seal is hanging out right by this boat slip in the harbor. And it's just it have you does it not blow your mind how much seals are ocean dogs? Yes, they're big, dumb puppy. Yes. Really? And just like the barking. Is that how they sound? I mean, don't tell fortune. And brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr brr Max was like, well, they're both mammals. And I was like, sure. But I don't know about that logic yet. I mean, they have the whiskers, they look like dogs

and they basically bark. So what is the connection there? I know this is not Angela's ask, but. No, this is getting your goat. Yeah, it's getting my seal. Your attitude. Was the seal just by himself? Oh my gosh, just hanging out, sunbathing

and just like cleaning himself and just so cute. Animals are just little freaks. He was very nice to us. Well, I mean, but if you were like to, you know, swim up and- You need to Google seals and find out more information on your own. Here's the thing, what could a SEAL really do to you?

If it was on land. Slap you. I mean, you've seen those little. Yeah. Oh yeah, it could slap you. I guess if you were in a little kayak, it could try and overturn you. That's right.

Watch out. I know walruses are curmudgeonly assholes. And I'll stand by that. I'll die on that hill. Yeah, you've had a run-in with a mean walrus? I know, but I do remember. The walrus's sound is kukuku-chu. That's correct. Oh boy.

When I was... Oh. Oh boy. I can't even look at you. Yeah, it takes facing away from the screen. I cannot look at you. Come on, that was away from the screen. I cannot look at you. Come on, that was pretty good. No, no.

That was pretty good. No. All right. That was really good. That was deep. That was good, that was good. I wish I had done that one. When I was 13, it was the,

I was at like Second City Improv class and the news team, the news came and filmed a bunch of us kids. And they told us they were going to do a news segment on TVO at 8 p.m. on Thursday or something. And I told everyone in my class to watch it. But I got the time wrong. And so at 8 p.m. everyone turned on the TV and it was walruses fucking. It was like a nature documentary and it was walruses with their weird penises having sex. How weird? When you're like 13, then everyone the next day was like, saw you on TV.

So yeah. Yeah. Wow. Well actually that's another thing they have in common with dogs is they have those weird little dicks. Should we go to commercial? Yeah. Wow. Well, actually, that's another thing they have in common with dogs is they have those weird little dicks. Should we go to commercial? Yeah. What are you guys grateful for?

I'm grateful for this conversation. Yeah. I mean, first and foremost. Yeah. Gratitude. I've been very grateful for friends. I've reconnected with friends lately and just some of my friends have been just amazing and really good friends.

Love that. And I'm really grateful for that. You get really busy and I've been guilty of like getting so into my job and traveling that, you know, you sort of, I wasn't always great at checking in and just, yeah, just seeing how people show up for you. It's pretty amazing. I made new friends, reconnected with old friends. It's meant a lot to me. I made new friends, reconnect with old friends.

It's meant a lot to me. Old friends kind of remind you who you are too. Like it's very grounding because you can reconnect with kind of old versions of yourself as well. Like you're like, oh yeah, I forgot that I'm also this person. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just seeing how people, when you need them, just freaking are there for you, it's like unbelievable.

People wanna feel like they have a purpose or they can help in some way, you know? And I feel like when you present that opportunity, I remember my biggest lesson with that was when Hurricane Katrina wiped out my hometown and I was raising money and collecting items to drive out to Mississippi because I have the hurricane hit my hometown.

And I remember we had like lamps out in the front yard. We were collecting donations 24 hours a day. I don't remember it was two for two or three days. And I sat back going, wow, people are so nice. I can't believe they're doing this for me and my town. And then I thought, and then I realized like, this isn't for me. Like I'm just like the vessel and like removing yourself from it and realizing like, I'm just like the vessel and like removing yourself from it and realizing like this is what people

just naturally wanna do is when there's a problem, I think most people really do want to help and chip in and do whatever they can to make things right. And then that was really, I mean, sadly, if it is pathetic on my part, I didn't really realize that until that moment in my life where I was like, this has absolutely nothing to do with me or where I live.

Well, yeah, it just reminds me how important people- Oh, and I'm not taking away from the fact that your friends love you and care about you. Oh, yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want that to be misunderstood. No, no, no, no, not at all. Yeah, I'm fortunate to see, no, they're doing that for them.

It's just been a big reminder and some people in my family are going through some things and people have been showing up for them. Just seeing people show up for people has been, I have a lot of gratitude for that. That's great. How about you too, gratitude wise? I'm feeling- That seal was-

Yeah, I feel very grateful for that seal, but I'm feeling really, really grateful for, you know, I've, and I know I've talked about this on here, I've made massive shifts with my time and my career, trying to find balance because I realized there was a time in my life, I would say it was right after the pandemic where I was talking about how I was trying to find work life balance. And when I really thought about it, I wasn't actually, I wasn't actually making these steps to shift things. And I made a massive shift with my job on Star Trek,

where I made a choice to take a much smaller load of episodes and with touring take a much smaller load of episodes and with touring a much smaller load with going on the road. And I'm seeing and feeling a massive shift in my life. And it feels so good. And every day I say to Stephanie, I'm like, I am so happy to be home. I am so happy. be home. I am so happy.

It just feels good. And I'm really grateful that I have taken this leap and maybe it won't be forever, but I've now been on the road for the majority for about a year and a half. And that's huge. That's so huge. And it's a massive shift in the past few decades.

And so I'm not only glad I took this leap, but I'm very thankful and grateful that it's panned out in the way that I hoped it would. And it is those little things of being at baseball practice, at pitching practice, at bad Mother's Day brunches. You know? Yeah, so I'm really, really enjoying that and I'm very grateful for it. And who knows, maybe in a year I'll be back up and running full throttle, but maybe not. I don't know, but I'm I'm really good with how how this shift is.

Love that. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah. It's important. You gotta live life and be a human. Yeah, and have stuff to write about too. Yeah. Yeah, it's all about what material will you get. Yeah, I know, I just did the same thing that I could do.

Yeah, well the thing is, I'm a peer. You better be writing some notes down. I'm living my life so I can create more work and I can leave town again. That's kind of sometimes how I do think of things. I'll plan a fun day for myself. I'll go to art galleries and stuff. I'm like, God, I hope I notice something funny or interesting. I'm feeling grateful for music these days. Like I'm playing a lot.

I'm like, I'm writing a lot of tunes and listening to a lot of music and I'm loving it. And going on big walks and getting really into LA and Griffith Park hikes and- What's a big walk? Like Griffith Park up to the observatory or like I went around the reservoir or where I went yesterday to Santa Barbara with my friend

and found these hot springs. It was this big hike and they were too hot to, in my mind I was gonna be bathing in them, but they were too hot. Oh, cause it was like a hundred and something degrees, right? I'm sorry, but hotter than you? Impossible. They were scalding hot and sulfuric

and it smelled like farts, but man, they were beautiful. And there was a naked man standing, just standing, contemplating it all. Was he an attractive man or was he? Full Dong out? Fortune Marie, Fortune Marie. We were not expecting that. All our listeners were wondering, Full Dong. You? We were not expecting that. All our listeners were wondering, full dog.

You scared off half of our listeners. No. Yes, here they come, creeping back. They're creeping back. Come on back, you guys, I won't say it again. Come on, ladies. For now. He was, like I'm very like, you know,

nudity positive or whatever, but it was a bit like, someone, I think he had written on a rock as you're approaching the hot springs, you're going up the path and someone had written clothing optional with a marker on a rock. Oh, it was a joke. Well, I think he wrote it and then. Oh my gosh.

He's like, nobody call the cops. You see the sign over there? Yeah, yeah. Do you really think he made the decision and was like? Maybe, yeah. That marker on the ground was a real telltale sign. Yeah, yeah. And the ink on his hands.

And then the thing, my attitude right now is, and I'd love to get your input on this, guys. We'd love to give it. What you would do in this situation. So I love to do laundry, I love to smell of fresh laundry. Same season. Yeah, it's, oh, we've talked about it. It's the, to fold the laundry, yeah, I love it.

So I put a load in and then I guess I didn't, you laughing at load, Fortune? No. I'm putting a load in? Nevermind. Fortune Marie. Fortune Marie. So it didn't fully dry,

and then I guess I didn't take it out in time. So it now has this smell, and I'm like, do I rewash the whole load? Like it smells a bit like damp, you know? And now it's dry, but it smells a bit like damp. So I gotta rewash everything? I think you do. Yeah, all right.

Yeah. I'm mad about it though for you. Mad about it. That's a matter too. Mad about it. Yeah, like the shirt I'm wearing now. But luckily you have a washer dryer, right? This is part of your home.

This is part of my home. Are you in your home? Is that one big trophy? My eyesight is so bad. Do you have one gigantic trophy behind you? That's from Taskmasters. That's a bunch of different trophies. Yeah, and that's a Taskmaster trophy on top.

It's a guy's head. I was hoping it was such a massive trophy that was like floor to ceiling. Oh yeah, one big trophy. Yeah. And then that's a day bed there. Has anyone stayed on it? Yeah, actually.

And it pulls out, like the bottom pulls out. And so it becomes big. Did somebody stay on that after they threw tea bags all night? They were so exhausted from the tea bag. Boy, is my arm tired. I cannot drive tonight. See if some place I can lie down.

Do you have what, two bedrooms, your place? I have two bedrooms and then I have tonight. Do you have some place I can lie down? Do you have what, two bedrooms your place? I have two bedrooms and then I have this back house that I'm trying to renovate kind of that will be a guest house. Oh, look at you homeowner. Are you gonna rent it out or are you gonna just have people in town stay there? I have a buddy and him and his girlfriend

might come for six months or something. Wow. And I think they're gonna pitch in for bills and stuff, but probably not. I like having people around. Okay, okay. Yeah, and also they might wanna kill each other after they move in there,

cause it's tiny. Yeah, but so far you're feeling like the house was, it's all positive, It was a good purchase. Yeah, it's got good vibes. Have your stress levels come down about making a big purchase or? Yeah, yeah, I think they have. And also just being so unsettled for eight, nine months,

I was like in Airbnb, so yeah, it's good. I got stuff on the walls. Yeah, it is nice to have like a space that's yours that you're like, this is my grounding place. Yeah, seriously. And does it feel like home? Not yet. Not yet. But maybe it will.

I have there's a fireplace, like a working fireplace. And they checked the love it. Would you call it a flu? A flu. A flu. A flu? A flu. They checked it and they said it's all working, but I'm just too scared on my own to do it.

Oh really? Yeah, what if a little ember comes out or something? But you had it inspected. Yeah. So then if it passed and it's good. But what do I, there's no grate in front of it or anything. So what, I just light some logs? You can buy a grate, they're cheap.

You're telling me I light some logs? And I think I need to know. You have to turn the gas on and light the, is it a gas or no? Oh, it's a wood. Oh wow. I love a fireplace. It's one of my favorite.

I have gratitude for fireplaces. I need to know, is it a flue or a flute? I thought it was a flue. I thought it was a flute. I thought it was a flue. I thought it was a F-L-O-T. Flu. Flu.

Oh, so I was right. So what's a F-L-O-T? You don't know what a flute is? What's a flute instrument? How does it sound? Yeah. And then what about a flute? Hold on, I'm still soloing.

A flute, an instrument is F-L-U-T-E. That's right. I wasn't going to barge in on your poor spelling. But what's a F-L-O-O-T? Is that anything? Oh, this is never. It's a fart or a toot in the urban dictionary. That's what a F-L-O-O-T.

Fortune Marie. It's an urban dictionary. Fortune Marie, you are dirtying up this episode. Left and right. What about, what's a flume? F-L-U-M. It's a channel for water, like a log flume. Okay, log flume.

Let's just keep asking each other questions. And Thomas, what is a... What did you call a flume? We're gonna change this podcast to quick Google this for me. What else can we learn? What's your matitude right now though guys? Oh, matitude. I liked Fortune when you said,

Matitude. Matitude. I feel like I already went off on my matitude about the bad service. Yeah, that was definitely a matitude. I mean, nothing's really like getting under my skin at the moment. Do you get road rage?

No, not these days because people are crazy. And like, you know, I feel like there was a time in our lives where you could just give a fun bird to somebody. Just a fun bird. Just a fun bird. Like, hey man, not these days. Don't be doing that.

And people are nuts. So, uh, I try to keep it pretty chill on the road because, uh, I mean, I, it feels like everyone, my attitude is that stress levels seem to be through the roof for everybody, so they So no one has any patience. And most people, their impatience is properly handled and they're like, ah, but then other people go to the extreme. And you're just like, y'all need to get some therapy.

This is too much. So yeah, impatience and stress levels, that would be an annoyance. I think people will gotta get that stuff in check. I'm often, I find myself in an Uber and then there'll be some road altercation. Oh yeah. Often I know it was the Uber driver's fault,

but I will get on board with whatever rent the driver says. He's like, did you see that? It's like, I'm like, oh, I can't believe that. What's that guy even thinking? Even though I know that it was the Uber driver. I don's like, did you see that? It's like, I'm like, oh, I can't believe that. What's that guy even thinking? Even though I know that it was the Uber driver. I don't know, I just wanna like. You gotta make sure you're safe. Yeah, and bond and everything.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I lived in Spain, I was walking down the street and these two guys were both at a stop sign and I don't know, someone pissed the other one off and they both hopped out of their car and just started beating the crap out of each other. Oh my Lord. Punching each other like crazy

and everyone's just kinda like, what? They do their thing and then both just get in their car and drive off, like what up? I was like, oh my God. I guess that's what chimpanzees do, like you get your rage out and then you move on from it, but that's not good. That is wild.

What I've been trying to do to de-stress myself, obviously we know Tig's treading water has been very helpful. Yeah, but it somehow became your treading water. That's right. Now I'm coming to get it. That's what you're known for. But May right. Now I'm familiar with it. But May has one. I'm so intrigued by them. I did a sauna and steam room the last couple of days and that was a nice stress reliever. Dude, it is a game changer. I feel very

grateful that I'm in a position where I could have splashed out and got that little sauna, but I am using it 20 minutes a day and it changes your whole cellular composition. It feels like you just feel alive and young. And you kind of meditate in there, right? Cause you can't bring your like, I don't think you bring your phone or anything in there cause it's too hot. I've sometimes snuck my little phone in there really,

but I put it on the ground. You should have it be a no phone zone for yourself. 100% I should, you're right. No phone zone. Yeah. Instead of figuring out a way to get it in there. I do spells sometimes in there. Like you have your bucket of water

that you're gonna splash the water on the coals and I'll put like essential oils and some sea salt for spell power and then I'll stir it three times and I'll make a wish. I'll put my crystals in there and then I'll really focus. And then I put the water on the, this is a real insight into my- This is some witchy stuff.

Yeah, this is my private, I mean, I tell my friends this and they're like, just go to therapy. And you can change your world. Just may for the love of God go to therapy. You don't wanna go to therapy? I actually have a consultation tomorrow morning. Oh, there you go.

Yeah, and another one. Can we come? Oh my God, please keep me honest. Well, that's what's important about therapy, which I think a lot of people get wrong is that they start lying to the therapist. And I'm like, that's the one person you gotta come clean to.

Like they wanna hear what they wanna hear. So they- You gotta, yeah. Well, they wanna, people go in there wanting someone to justify their actions. Right, yeah. That's not gonna do you any good. You're going there to break those habits. Like whatever the habits are.

So it is the one person you gotta tell all your mess to. So I highly encourage that because just going in there and being like, this person in my life did this and this person did this and I don't know why, like that, well, it's not gonna get us anywhere. Well, so I should stop griping about you, Fortune, and my therapy. Right. Yeah, so I should stop griping about you, Fortune, in my therapy. Right.

Yeah, it's, well, cause you know, you're meeting someone you want them to like you, like everybody wants a person to like them, but at the end of the day, you're literally paying them to break these old habits and to heal these traumas. I know. Yeah, it's gross. I've had moments where I've, my therapist where I'm like,

I have something to tell you and I'm not proud about, I'm not proud of this. Yeah. Yeah. Like I have to preface it with like, I just want you to know I'm cringing right now and I have to tell you this thing that I did or thought or said or wanted or felt.

Because I guess their instinct a lot of the time is to be like self-love and don't be so hard on yourself. And yeah, but sometimes you gotta- Their job is to try to, you know, point out why am I doing these things? Why are these patterns like this? Why do I have this insecurity? Why am I avoiding it about this?

Or whatever it is, you know. Yeah, yeah, your blind spots, yeah. That's their job to then hear what are these patterns that you're doing? Why are you doing this? And tell you like, you do this because this. So I don't know, I'm just, I encourage you to, so I love that you're going.

Go in there and blow your mind. Yeah, I was planning on lying. So, no, of course I'm gonna be. But your instinct will be like, I want this person to like me. No, I gotta shake that. Shake that off. Just, this is the time to just tell all your secrets,

tell all your shit. Yeah, yeah, I love that. Yeah. Shall we hear what Angela answered? Yeah, let's do it. That's why we're here, right? My attitude, I'm gonna take it straight from today. We were selling our car, okay?

And so we go to CarMax. Manny's like, I'm gonna take the car to CarMax and we're gonna sell the car before we fly out. And he gets there and then calls me and is like, hey, the car's under your name. You actually have to be the one to come out here. I hadn't even showered yet. And I have Rosie, I gotta change her diaper,

gotta get us both dressed, rush, get in the car, be over there, they're like, okay, you're next in line. I'm like, perfect, they're like, it should be like maybe like an hour. And I'm like, wait, hold on. I thought I was next. Um, and then rush back home, took a shower and I was ready like right before you walked in the door.

So that's my attitude is like having to go waste time. Yeah. To go sell a car at CarMax. I guess I'm attitude. My gratitude is I feel like I would say this every single day of my life, but my daughter always, I am grateful for her love for music. She loves music, she loves to sing, she loves to dance, she has rhythm, like she's on beat when she claps and when she dances. And even like the intro of a song,

it's like music, music, music. And then it goes, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. And then the beat drops, whatever. She's full on dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Like she follows the beat. And she just, I love watching her love music. And that's what I'm grateful for. That's great.

That's awesome. We didn't even talk about, Angela's so funny. She's a, many people know who she is, but she's such an awesome standup. Some people know her from back in the day from the Mad TV days. She was one of the early people that like blew up on YouTube. Like her nail salon video went like viral, viral, viral.

And she's just one of the funniest standups. And she's back at YouTube, right, with her latest standup special. That's awesome. And an NFL cheerleader back in the day, I think she was for the Raiders, I wanna say. Well, I'll tell you what, you know who was not? Me.

All three of us. Speak for yourself. Yeah. Well, this has been lovely. I mean, hasn't it guys? Hasn't it just? I just love catching up with you. Indeed, indeed.

And you. And you, and you, and you, and you. What do you have going on, friends? Well, I'm on my Taking Care of Biscuits tour and it's in full swing. It started in June 5th, St. Louis. Kansas City, I have a 4 p.m. show on June 7th that I would love people to come to.

Then Mulvane, Kansas, Las Vegas, Lexington, Kentucky, Knoxville, Tennessee, Asheville, North Carolina. And then we just added like a ton more in like Houston and DC and Boston, Chicago, all those good places. Love it. And how's the material coming? Like it's feeling good? Really good, yeah.

You know, there'll be, it'll keep evolving. And, but the, you know, I was so nervous when this tour started about like, what am I going to talk about? But it's, the stories have been super fun. That's great. What about you little cowboy? The things, the shows I'm really excited about and would love to sell out are in June, June 10th.

I'm in San Francisco playing my music album. June 12th in Portland. I've never been to Portland before in my whole life. Portland, Oregon? Yeah. Wow, that place is made for you. Yeah, you like it. Really? Yes.

I can't wait. The Northwest in general is a very beautiful area. Yeah, I was thinking about camping or something. I say that, I'm not gonna do that. I'm thinking about it, but it. And then June 13th, I'm in Vancouver at the Vogue Theater, which is a beautiful big theater where I film my stand-up special actually. And yeah, playing music. So come, I'm going to do more covers. I'm going to play new tunes. I'm going to play the whole album. And what about you, Tia?

The documentary I produced, Come See Me in the Good Light. Listen, it's not often that Tribeca Film Festival takes a film that already premiered at Sundance. And you know what? They're taking ours. That's right, they did. Yeah, it's exciting. It's the weekend of June 6th. There's several screenings.

And then let's see, I'll be at Largo June 13 13th and then I'll be in Eureka Springs Arkansas June 14th then I'll be at Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles June 21st August 23rd I'll be in P-Town I have two shows I think I think the first is sold out the second is maybe almost sold out. But check online the documentary. It was purchased by Apple and it'll be premiering in the fall, but we are hitting so many festivals right now. And you can also get Handsome merch at handsomepod.com.

We have some- Oh man, we got good stuff. Lovely items. Oh yeah, I've been seeing our new tees out in the wild. Some people came to my last show with the rocker kind of tee. Yeah, that one looked really cool. Yeah.

Well, I don't know. I feel like this was solid and maybe until next time we should just go ahead and keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsomepod. What a podcast! and please follow us on social media at HandsomePod. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first. Like you know to check that you've got all the different types of cutlery and glassware

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And I'm Liz Feldman, and we're the hosts of a new HeadGum podcast called Here to Make Friends. Liz and I met in the writer's room on a little hit TV show called Dead to Me, which is a show about murder. But more importantly, it's also about two women becoming very good friends in their 40s. Which can really happen, and it has happened to us!

It's true! Because life has imitated ours! And then it imitated life! Time is a flat circle! And now! We're making a podcast that's about making friends. And we're inviting an incredible guest like Vanessa Bear. Wow, I have so much to say.

Lisa Kudrow. Feelings, they're a nuisance. Nick Kroll. I just wanted to say hi. And Matt Rogers. I'm like on the verge of tears. So good. So good. So good to join us and hopefully become

our friends in real life. Take it out of the podcast studio and into real life. Along the way, we are also going to talk about dating. Yep. Spousing. True. Parenting. Career-ing. Yeah. And why we love film.

And Louisa and It's the Greatest Movie of All Time. Shouldn't need to be said. No, we said it. But it's just a true thing. So please subscribe to Here to Make Friends on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Pocket Casts, or wherever you get your podcasts, and watch video episodes on YouTube.

New episodes every Friday.