Handsome - Jeff Probst asks about emotions and cells

Episode Date: July 16, 2024

Jeff Probst of "Survivor" asks about cellular knowledge, plus breaking news from Tig, Netflix and chill (for real), and loaded nachos!LIVE STREAMING SHOW Aug 24! Tickets: dynastytypewriter.com/handsomeHandsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media: @handsomepodMerch: handsomepod.comWatch on youtube: youtube.com/@handsomepodEmail the show: [e-mail] Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Cheers. Welcome to the Handsome Pod. I'm one of your handsome hosts, Mae Martin. I'm joined, of course, by my handsome co-hosts. Fortune Feimster. Tig Notaro. Clean entry. Yes.

No fuss, no mess. Just right in there. No fuss, no mess. That's what we like around here at the Handsome Pod. We hate a mess. Exactly, hate it. Happy weekend. Oh man, yeah, happy weekend to you.

We're neck deep in the middle of a play date this morning. Oh, no way. Yeah, yeah, happy weekend to you. Yeah, we're neck deep in the middle of a play date this morning. Oh, no way. Yeah, yeah, kids start early. Oh, I thought it was just like one of your friends. Yeah. What time did the play date start? I'll be honest, 10 minutes ago, right when I got on. You were like, well, have fun guys.

Yeah. Yeah, but it's still like. Nobody touched the. Yeah. Yeah. But it's still like. Nobody touched the knives. Yeah. Mommy's gotta go do a podcast. I mean Stephanie's down there. Stephanie's down there. All right.

When the kids have a play date, it's cause like in their minds, they're gonna be just hanging out with their friends, but then they do kind of need help with what to do, right? Like they're. What do you mean with what to do? Well, like they kind of need a grownup to be like, why don't you guys do this?

Oh, no, no, no. No? No, no, no. Tell me. No. They are, they have a plan and it's to play basketball and they are also going to do their Pokemon battles. I see, I see. I guess they trade Pokemon and then there's another game called Yu-Gi-Oh!

And they have Yu-Gi-Oh! battles. So they're friends that are coming over. Everybody knows what the business is about. There's probably a really niche group of people who are handsome pod fans and Yu-Gi-Oh! battle fans who are like, finally. The crossover they've been waiting for. Have you ever heard of it?

Yu-Gi-Oh rings a bell. I know Pokemon battles are huge. Fortune, are you a big Pokemon battler? I definitely am not. I'm not into, what's the right word? Nerd stuff. I'm kidding. It's like little boys stuff. I just never, like all little boys love Pokemon, right?

Yeah, I think my kids have taken it up a notch, a nerd notch to- A nerd notch. Yeah, they took it up a nerd notch to Yu-Gi-Oh. Stephanie sent me a video of these two boys, your boys, at an adult Pokemon battle event where it's all these men with ponytails who are just sitting deadly serious and they're in their 30s, 40s sitting at a table and then the camera just pans over in this perfect reveal of these tiny two redheaded eight-year-olds just fully like these are our people. That's amazing. It's so funny

also imagining you and Stephanie bringing them there like you guys are so out of place in that world. Well, I'll be honest, I wasn't there but Stephanie there. And she said that the men that were there didn't even notice her. And she said that kind of hit her later. Like, oh yeah, they don't even know I'm here. That is so funny. They were deeply, deeply immersed in their game. Yeah.

And yeah, it's like they're speaking another language. They're just like, well, the attack points are level four at the moment. So. Well, yeah, and that's the thing is this game that they play, there's math and you have to do math in the battle. And I'm just like, oh my God, just go kick a ball. Yeah.

Which they do. Kick a ball, please. Go throw a ball, do something. But they lost me at math, I can't. Oh my God, they lost me at Yu-Gi-Oh, math. I still use a tip calculator. What's a tip calculator? You can't do 20%. It's more of like, when it's like 22 or 23,

it's an odd number. $22, the tip would be $4.40. I swear to God. And you know, some of us just don't do math. Listen, I'm the one that has barely an education, but I know how to do the, I told somebody how to do a tip calculation and it changed her life and blew her mind

and it's so simple. It's like if the bill was like $80, 10% eight and 20% 16. Well, yeah, you just double the first number there. Yeah. Okay, it's still like even as you're talking about it and I know it's simple, I'm getting like a lump in my throat.

Like I'm gonna cry like in grade eight when I just didn't understand. Cause I'm like, I know that sounds simple, but my mind's saying, what if it's like, doesn't that only work if it's a small number? No, it keeps working. No, it actually keeps doing what it's doing. One time I was 12 and I was going on a date

with Jamie Griffin and my mom let us go out for dinner by ourselves and she gave me $80 to go for dinner. Was Jamie male, female, non-binary kid? Jamie was a boy with a mushroom cut and I was crazy about this kid. Oh my God. And you had to pay though? Yeah, I wanted to take him out. Oh, okay. He told me- And you had to pay though? Yeah, I wanted to take him out.

Oh, okay. You know, I wanted to wine and dine him. And so I think it was my birthday. My mom said, take Jamie Griffin, take him out. And I was like, we're going for sushi. Show him a nice time. Sushi, yeah. How old were you?

Eight. 12. Oh, 12. 12, you're eating sushi at 12? I was like, get that. I don't think I even knew what sushi was at 12. I think I was getting like a chicken teriyaki bento box. Got it, truth comes out. There was this place like two blocks from my house

so my mom let us go. So Jamie was like, what the fuck is happening? Like he just wanted to have pizza and watch a movie but I was like, we're going to sushi. So we go and I have my 80 bucks and the bill was like, I don't know, 18 bucks total for both of us. And then I just didn't, I was so anxious about calculating the tip. You left it all? I left the 80 bucks. So then we're, and my

mom was expecting a lot of change. And then, so we're walking out of the restaurant and then the waitress kindly chases after us and is like, excuse me, you left all your money. This is way too much. And I was like, no, I meant to, yep, I intended to. And I like insisted on leaving it all. And then I got home and my mom was like, where's the rest of the cash? Poor Jamie was just like, this family's fucked.

Poor, poor Jamie. Jamie just probably thought you were a baller. Yeah. Maybe. Well, you know who didn't think I was a baller? Who? The person I tipped when I was in, God, I can't remember where I was overseas. And somebody told me that the way to tip

was to go up to the waiter or waitress, look them in the eye, place the money in their hand and say thank you and put the tip in their hand. And because I had just arrived to town and we had gone to a really nice restaurant, me and my friend that were, we found like the nicest restaurant in the city. And so I wasn't familiar with how to use the money.

I was just, I had my meal and I was saying thank you and tipping and the longer we were there traveling, I realized I had looked that person in the eye, said thank you and put essentially a penny in there. The palm of their hand and confidently walked off like, yeah, you can keep all of that. Wow.

Like the thank you must've seemed like code for fuck you. Like, thank you. Oh my God. Yeah, it was so mortifying. Like when it all clicked for me, like this is how you do it. Oh, by the way, I have some breaking news. I did something that you will not believe I did.

Oh, okay. Wait, can we guess? Wait, do we need a breaking news sound effect? Sure. Da da da da da! Whoa. Breaking news. Imagine if that was the one on the news.

Da da! I thought you were going to use the little machine that has sound effects. Whoa, imagine if that was the one on the news. Da da! I thought you were gonna use the little machine that had sound effects. I know, I had to switch to a different machine because there was a buzz. The sound effect you did sounded like what's-her-name's coming on the stage.

I can't remember. Ethel Merman? Sure, might as well be her. You know how... Da da da da! Bam bam bam bam! Yeah! Ethel Merman! Hello everybody, it's me, Ethel.

Who wants to show? I'm ready to perform for you. Cause I'm... Da da da da! Ethel Merman. Well that was your breaking news song. I don't know what you want from me. So we're ready for your breaking news song.

I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I want to hear your breaking news song. I Well that was your breaking news song. I don't know what you want from me.

I wanted a breaking news song. Breaking news. Should we guess what the news is? So it's something that we would never expect you to do. Trampoline park. No. Go-karts. No.

Laser tag. Kiss the Man on screen for acting purposes. Nope. You got your Cooderwax. Fortune Marie. Fortune Marie, how dare you? I wish that was the breaking news. And I've got a code for all of us.

Oh, you handsome listeners. I negotiated a code for 15% off for all our listeners. The code is ouch. Okay, so that's not it? No. You ate a Big Mac. Nope. Oh God, that would be more shocking than the Kooterwax.

What if I made a day of it? I went out to eat at McDonald's, or I went out to eat, had a Big Mac, got the old Kooterwax. Went on a trampoline. Went on a trampoline. Went on a trampoline. Oh God. Geez, I think I'm out of guesses.

Me too, that was all I got. I binged a TV show. Wow, that is out there for you. Baby Reindeer. Oh yeah. I knew it was gonna be that. Yeah, have you both seen it? Yeah, I really liked it.

I have not binged a show in a long time and I was telling Stephanie that like, I feel like this is why I don't watch things because it's- Oh, because you get sucked in? Well, no, because I don't get sucked in. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay, fine. All right, sure, sure, sure.

Seen this before. I just have not seen anything that raw and intense and seemingly honest. Like things that like, why would you even put that out there if that wasn't true? It doesn't make you look terribly great. I will say that I know Richard from the UK and he's yeah, super talented. And I remember when Baby Reindeer was a stage show

first. He was on the circuit and around everywhere and then he suddenly came out with this incredible stage show that was pretty much that story and it just like blew London away. And then, yeah, how amazing is it? Jess Gunning playing. Oh yeah, she was incredible. Yeah. Is that the woman? Yeah, playing the stalker. Oh my gosh, I kept telling Stephanie,

I was like, I keep forgetting that this is an actor. I know, she was unbelievable. I kept forgetting that was an actor. Did he really have a video that went viral? No, I don't think so. I don't think so. I think like elements were were fictionalized for sure. I think it was the stage show that happened that started getting written about. Yeah, yeah. And then and then maybe she became aware of that. I don't know. But

yeah, either way, I was just I was truly floored. I was like, wow. I mean, even his acting. Yeah, like, Every little thing was so well done. Anyway. You know what, it's such a good example of like, I feel like sometimes the big streamers and stuff are like, we gotta make stuff that just appeals to the broadest number of people and they're so second guessing themselves all the time.

Yeah. It's such a good example of like a really specific authored story where they just let someone, you know, it's a small budget. He just made it in the UK and had total control. And of course it blows up. Yeah, I mean, that's a really good point and think something for people to remember because yeah, you hear it all the time.

Like, no, we don't want those little tiny, nuanced stories and characters. And, and then it's you see this and it's like, oh my Lord, it's so well done. I think, I just, I was really blown away. That's all. I just thought I'd blow you away and say, I actually watched something. I'm picturing you like just for some reason,

like 10 inches from the screen, like just all the light of the screen. Oh no, no, no. I was lounging on the couch real far back. But we did have a moment where Stephanie and I had a boohoo together during the series. Aw. Aw.

Yeah. A unifying boohoo. Yeah. You're like, I'm crying. Yeah, I'm crying. I'm crying. Did you have popcorn? No, we didn't have popcorn. That's a good question though. I'm crying. I'm crying. Did you have popcorn? No, we didn't have popcorn.

That's a good question though. Thank you, Fortune. You didn't sprinkle some dyke dust on the popcorn? No, no, just shoveling dyke dust in without anything else. Have you? Oh, I was gonna ask something inappropriate. If I kind of wanna know. Let's hear it.

Okay, but it might have to be edited out. It might be. Finally, somebody it might be, I might have to edit it out, it might be. Finally, somebody else is gonna ask something inappropriate. Have you guys ever, not necessarily in your current relationships, but in any relationship, I feel like there's a specific type of hooking up that happens when you're both watching a show

and you're kind of still paying attention to the show and you're kind of just slugs and like someone just gets someone off. I mean, not to baby-rank you, that would be inappropriate. That has never happened to me. Is this inappropriate? It's like one of my favorite ways. It's one of my favorite ways.

Cause it's like- I like one eye on the television and one eye on the, you know what? One eye on the motor boat. I think I need to explain more. So you're like, so you're like, do you really need to explain?

We have a pretty clear picture of it. So you're on the couch, watch the show and then all of a sudden you get busy. I know, I know. I'm sorry. It's early for this, but I think my, what I like about it. I'm sorry it's early for this, but I think what I like about it. I just left a play date for this. I don't know about all you handsomes out there, but I'm totally ready for summer. My skin,

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They just like put their hand to my pants or something. And it's hot that they're not even really paying attention to me. They're just watching the TV show. That's a boring show. Or no, it's or I'm boring because they're just watching it. And then I'm just like next to them on the couch. Yeah, I didn't see that coming. Isn't that what Popeye makes in Popeye's having?

Oh, you're right. I'll wave, I'll wave. Anyways. Two against one is what I have to say. I can totally see that happening to you, May though. Honestly, I can see anything happening to May I think you invite that a little bit more. Right. Like I'm sending off.

I'm more of like, hey, we're watching a show. Come on. Here's some popcorn. I would have popcorn butterfingers. Nobody wants that. Right, right, right. I'm more, yeah, I'm like, let's say you're hungover from the night before.

I could see May being into like, I love popcorn butterfingers. Oh my God, I draw the line. You know, actually, I don't know. I feel like there's few situations that you would be in May where that wouldn't be off the table. Right, yeah, I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think what situations.

Maybe like a public thing where a bunch of people around you probably would be more not into that, but like. But notice Fortune said probably. That's true. Yeah. Yeah. It could be an exhibitionist. Who knows?

All we see right now is May's head and shoulders. We have no idea what's going on. What's happening down there. Yeah, or like what sort of visitor might be in the room. Did someone crawl into your room? No, I draw the line at during the handsome pod. That is off limits. Oh, thank you.

This is a sacred time. Cause we're chatting with friends on the handsome pod. Dun dun dun dun. Well, hanky panky. Cheers. No, but like, you know, even like dun, dun, dun. Or whatever. Hanky panky. Cheers. No, but like, you know, even like Netflix and chill, like that phrase is like, you know, you're, but I guess in that scenario, whoever, you stop watching.

Yeah, you're purposely watching something that you aren't that interested in, don't you think? So, but wait, what is it called when you actually just wanna watch Netflix and chill? I guess that's called binging. I think it's called like, yeah, you go, no, actually Netflix and chill. Okay, all right.

Thank you, if you specify. Because I feel like I could see myself getting caught up in a weird situation of somebody who's like, want to come over and Netflix and chill or whatever. And I'd be like, yeah, sounds good. And then, peanut butter. And then you show up and I'm there with my butter fingers. Popcorn butter fingers.

Oh, butter fingers over there and we'll keep it out of your pants. Oh my God. Well, look at you binging. I know. If there are other shows like that, let me know. I love Dark, Dark, Dark. Okay, okay.

Dark, Dark, Dark. I love Dark, Dark, Dark. Like a movie that I was very into was Dancer in the Dark with Bjork. Oh my God, really? I never saw that. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Dancing in the dark. It's so depressing, Dancer in the Dark. It's like- And like Boys Don't Cry, dancer in the dark. It's like. And like boys don't cry. Yeah. That kind of stuff. Okay, okay, you want like true trauma. Devastating. I like leaving something devastated.

Oh well, all of us strangers, all of us strangers I wept in recently. That's a love story, but it is devastating. Okay. Would you be into a heartbreaking story that starts with high schoolers and goes into college? Or is that too young? I don't know what you're talking about.

That show Normal People made me so sad. Well, if people could write in, tell me the most devastating movies and TV shows they've ever seen, that's what I'm looking for. What about Steel Magnolias? Shelby, Shelby! I haven't seen that. Shelby!

I'm assuming that's a quote from Steel Magnolia. I haven't seen it. Oh, May! It's really more of a gem for us Southern folks. Okay, okay. They had a groom's cake that was an armadillo cake with red velvet. I mean, how do you appeal to a Southern person

more than a red velvet armadillo cake? Oh, I have a joke for you. Oh, good. Great, a joke. Yes, well, I'm jumping around. I'm like crazy here today. Well, you're binging things. You're just a different person.

Play date. Okay, you're binging things. You're just a different person. Play date. Okay, here comes a joke. Why did the chicken cross the road? I guess it's not to get to the other side. Nope. Because it had, yeah, it had somewhere to be. That's right, Mae. Yeah.

It had somewhere to be. Yeah. That's right. That is right, my friend. Yes. It had somewhere to be. Wait, I can't tell if you're joking. Did I actually guess it?

You didn't, but it was utterly precious. Oh, it had was utterly precious. Because it had somewhere to be. I really thought that that might, okay. No, I know, but the answer is to prove to the armadillo that it could be done. Wow, that's for the Southerners, thank you. They are just dead on the side of the road. Oh, is that right?

Like endlessly. They're so slow. Just turned into a red velvet cake. Yeah. Have you ever hit an animal with your car? Oh God. Sorry. Must we go into this? You said you like dark. I'm in baby.

Well, I don't like real. I mean, I know these other stories are real, of course, but I don't want to like reminisce about, oh, I know these other stories are real, of course, but I don't wanna like reminisce about, oh, I ran over a squirrel. Tell me the craziest story. When did you kill an animal? Welcome to our comedy podcast. Things like, no, thank you.

I think that's one of my big fears of learning to drive is- As animals. Hitting a little bird or something. At least you're not on a bunch of country roads in LA. Are there country roads in LA? Country roads take me home to the place

I belong. Rob along. Rob. Babylon. Babylon. Babylon. West Virginia. West Virginia. West Virginia. West Virginia. Mama.

Mama. Mama. Take me home. Take me home. L.A. roads. Hollywood Boulevard. What is this podcast? Sometimes you can't avoid it, May,

and that's unfortunate, but you do the best you can. Can we recreate the chicken cross the road? And you answered just very knowingly and confident. Me? Yeah. Yeah. Why did the chicken cross the road? He had somewhere to be. That's right. So should we go into our question? Sure.

That was a sort of chaotic opening chunk. I liked it. We jumped around a lot. We were, as they say in the biz, all over the place. They also say that outside of the biz, I think. I know that every guest that we have, we say that we're excited. This one, for for me is huge.

And I have to kind of downplay it in my home where I live because I think if Parvati knew what a fan of this person, of Jeff Probst that I was, I think she'd be a little concerned. Jeff Probst to me, I mean, I've watched every episode of Survivor, as you know, probably multiple times. I'm a huge fan. And to me, Jeff Probst, he's the heart of the show. He's like King Solomon to me. On that show, he's got no earpiece in. He's rolling with the punches and he's having to respond instantly to kind of moral dilemmas. Sometimes there's a medical emergency. Sometimes there's a controversy or something. And I just feel like his judgment is always fair.

I feel like I want him, like I trust him with my life. I could see a video of him committing a murder, running over an armadillo. And I would still be like, he probably was in the right. Like he- That's my guy. Were you saying running over an armadillo is a murder? Like you should go to prison for that?

Well, that's an interesting question actually. Yeah. Yeah. Here is my question about Survivor. I know we're trying to introduce this man, but is Survivor really like people climbing trees and eating bugs and really trying to survive or do they get like a PB&J on the side? Okay, okay. I'm so glad you asked. I mean, I really could write a PhD thesis on the evolution of the game. I would say in the early days of Survivor in the first few seasons, the actual

survival element was really paramount. Like they're in Survivor Africa, they had no water, they were in survivor Africa, they had no water, they were so thirsty and people lose insane amounts of weight. Now in the current era, because you can win reward challenges, so you could win a prize of some food, like some nachos or something. Nachos? Really? Like out on an island? You know what I love in Africa and the outback is some nachos. Oh wait, so you're not always on an island? You know what I love in Africa, in the outback, is some nachos. Oh wait, so you're not always on- It changes locations. No, now it's always- You're not always on an island.

Now they're always on Fiji. Oh, they are? Yeah, they used to change locations, and now they're- They're like, what are we doing? This is a lot of work for ourselves. Well, exactly, yeah. And so yeah, now they get no rice, no beans,

and they can win those things. So yeah, people are really hungry. There's been crazy medical emergencies. I'm sorry, I feel like I missed something. They get no rice, no beans, but they do get nachos? Okay. They. I'm so, I'm truly confused.

So, explaining survivor to to Tig is the best. I know, I should have. I'm sorry, I just have a question. But truly, how do you deny people rice and beans, but you're like, here are loaded nachos. Okay, I'll give you an example. I'll give you an example. Let's say there's an endurance challenge

where the players are competing to see who will be safe at the vote. Like if you win this immunity idol, then you can't be voted out. So everybody has to hold their arm up in the air for as long as they can. Oh, I'm out already. You're out? I'm already out. My arm's hurting looking at you doing this. You haven't even tried it.

How are you going to get the nachos? I'm not going to have nachos, nor rice or beans. I'm gonna be freaking starving. But this is the thing, and this is the beauty of Jeff Probst, is his sort of devilishness is like, you'll be standing there and you're competing and then he'll come out with a plate of nachos and he'll say, if anyone feels safe

and they wanna give up the chance to win immunity, drop your arm. I'm going for those nachos. You couldn't pay me to go on to a show like that. Really? I don't wanna survive, I just wanna live my life. Right. I just wanna live my life.

The whole time I was on that show, I'd be like, what am I doing? I could be touring right now. This is crazy. And I'm standing on a pole, holding my arm up, trying to get nachos. What if we just did a survivor with the three of us? Well, you know, May did the survivor thing

for their birthday. Yeah, so we could get that company to these guys who run like Survivor in a day. They're just events. So I don't wanna do that. You don't wanna do that either? Fortune, you don't wanna do that. You just want the nachos when you want the nachos.

I'll sit there with nachos. I'll watch you guys while I eat nachos. Oh. If you're a homeowner who doesn't want to deal with switching your home insurance, we understand. Switching can feel like a big task. That's why Allstate is dedicated to helping you find the lowest home insurance rate possible, as fast as possible. Check Allstate first and you could save $574 on your home insurance.

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Cooter to people who wanna do it. Cooters. I get it. They wanna, people like to test themselves, be challenged. I'm not that gal, no? You don't like a challenge. I mean, I like a challenge in that like, here was a difficult task in life that I overcame, but that doesn't involve me in the wilderness.

Like balancing on a narrow ledge in the ocean. This is like, oh, I hit a milestone in my career. Not like I started a fire with a twig and a pine cone. I don't know. Well, that's not gonna work. Even though I was a Girl Scout, we all know this. Oh God. Must we reminisce again?

If anybody was, you know, set up for success with Survivor, it's us that were former Girl Scouts. I don't know, I think Canadians have an advantage. I do think Canadians would be good at this. Yeah, but really it's more about the social dynamics and the politics than it is. Yeah, because everybody's backstabbing each other. But wait, aren't you all really nice Canadians?

Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, but put into those situations. Oh. Because Parvati is really nice, but Parvati was just on that Trader show and was a Trader. Maybe that's part of why it's such a fun fantasy when you're watching it, because it's like you have license to cheat and lie

and deceive for once in your life, you can just be so self-interested. And you do form real relationships that help you get through to the end, but. Would you do it, May, survivor? I always thought I'm too self-conscious like about my skin and stuff like that. But now that I feel better about my body,

like since top surgery and stuff, I'm 37. I'm thinking if maybe in a couple of years, I'm gonna give up everything and just beg to be on Survivor. Why do you have to give up everything to do it? Because I think I'm gonna humiliate myself and my career will be over. I think something will happen.

I'm allergic to coconuts, first of all, and that's like the main thing they eat and drink. That is true. Yeah, I think you should give up everything. Do you think I should? Yeah, I think it's worth it. I think I'll pre- Give up everything.

Preemptively, I'll give up everything. Yeah, give it up. Can you stay with the pod though? Yeah, yeah, you're having a good time. Yeah, yeah. I'll be like, made it past April and everything. Oh, but you know what? When you do the podcast from the island, you're gonna have to use

a coconut earphone and like a coconut microphone. You know how they did on like Gilligan's Island and so your ears gonna twitch. I might get a rash on my face from the coconut recording device. Should we introduce this guy? Yes, yeah, yeah. Yeah, on a real tangent today. Okay, so yeah, that's all I'll say. Jeff Probst, he's an iconic TV producer and host.

He had his own talk show. He's a brilliant speaker. And look, do I know the guy? No, I have no idea what he's like. I've seen him on hikes. I go, what up? He goes, what up, Fortune? I say, what up, Jeff?

I can't believe you waited this long to say that. Give each other a little nod. What's up, Jeff? What's up, Fortune? He's't believe you waited this long to say that. Give each other a little nod. What's up, Jeff? What's up, Fortune? He's always very nice. I've never met him. I'll tell you this. He's handsome.

Oh, is he ever? He's like Tom Cruise. Fortune, you need to calm down. He's a handsome man. And he's now an handsome, asking a question. Should we hear what he has to say? Yeah, let's hear. 40 minutes in.

Hey, handsome pod. Jeff Probst from Survivor. Honored to be on your podcast. Usually I see Fortune when she's walking Freiman Canyon. Tig, last time I saw you was backstage at a SIA concert in the Hollywood Bowl. And May, we haven't met, but we have a mutual acquaintance. So I feel like I know you a little bit from that. All right, here's my question

Do ourselves know the difference between a physical experience and an emotional experience? Here's what I mean Let's take you're a sports fan and you're watching your favorite team from the comfort of your couch with a bowl of nachos And your team wins and you go we won yes we won we got him do yourselves actually believe that you won did you get that experience even though you didn't play that is my question of the day well he did not disappoint i mean he mentioned the hike, he said my name, he mentioned nachos, and then he asked

a really philosophical question. You were beaming the whole time. He also mentioned meeting me at SIA. Oh, sorry, yes, of course, yeah. Yeah, let's not forget. Oh yeah, that too. That's such a good question. Do your cells know the difference

between a real experience and like a vicarious experience? I feel like they don't personally. They did a study and your brain responds the same. When you're looking at a real apple, your brain like spikes in certain ways. And when you close your eyes and they say, imagine that apple, your brain responds in the exact same way.

See, I was right. And also apples are my favorite fruit. You're kidding. No. I was right. And also, apples are my favorite fruit. You're kidding. No. I love them. I eat a crispy, crispy apple every day of my life. I'm trying to keep the doctor away, let's be honest. What brand, what type? I love, what are they called?

Don't say Granny Smith. No, no, no. Honeycrisp, Fuji. Yeah, what did you say the first one? Honeycrisp. Honeycrisp. Oh, what did you say the first one? Honey Crisp. Honey Crisp, oh my Lord, Honey Crisp. Oh my goodness. Honey Crisp, when you got a Crisp Honey Crisp, get out of my way.

I love those. But think about the other fruit options. You got banana. Look, I love fruit. I love golden kiwi. Yeah, a nanner this morning. I had a banana too. I had a nanner too. We love golden kiwi. I had a golden nanner this morning. I had a banana too. I had a nanner too.

We all had nanners. This is our first time to be three on the same page. Three on three nanners. Yeah, I had peanut butter with my banana. I had almond butter with my nanner. I had mine straight. Wow. Straight.

Yeah. No, I love golden kiwi, as I mentioned. Love those. So if you close your eyes right now and you picture that honey crisp apple. My mouth starts watering, truly. It's like you're having it. Yeah.

Wow, that's crazy. Pavlov's dog. Yeah. I am Pavlov's dog. I use that VR headset, you know? Mm-hmm, for what? Well, I used to use it for working out, but it does have, oh, and this is,

I know you already said that you're not into nerd stuff, Fortune, and- I might be into this, you never know. There is a Star Wars game on- I'm out. Oh. I'm still in, I'm still in. Are you, okay, Tig, can I bring it

around to your house one time, and Max and Finn can try it, and you can try it? No. It's a VR, no? No, I do not want them near that. Oh, oh shit. They still think they have iPads and they don't. They have tablets that are not, that are like eight years old that don't do anything

and they call them iPads in front of their friends. What, because it's like crack cocaine, like you don't want them to get a taste of VR. Well, I just don't think there's any reason to like hurry them into that kind of world. Okay, so then it's you and me privately, we're in a room. Yeah.

It's a Star Wars game. Fortune's there eating nachos and watching. And it's basically, it's a narrative virtual reality story where you discover that you have the force. It's so realistic. You're flying the Millennium Falcon. The Empire captures you. And you basically, the whole thing takes about six hours,

but you can play it in chunks. But by the time. Six hours? Who has this to do? Yeah, oh my God. You're in escape rooms and like playing Star Wars for six hours? I don't know if you guys have a six hours spare one afternoon.

I mean, if somebody writes me too long of a text or email, I'm like, oh boy, I feel too bad. I get wordy. But by the end of this game, you battle Darth Vader and you defeat him. And I have to say that- Six hours later. When I played this game, it was so real.

And by the end of it, I really felt like I'd grown as a person. Like I had faced a fear. I felt like I'd had the experience of battling an enemy and conquering him. And cause it's scary. I really was like, I'm a better person at the end. So you're thinking your cells were like believing

that this was true. Oh, are you trying to bring it back to topic? Yeah, no, that's why I brought it up. I'm not just randomly like, you guys played this game? No, I think my cells were like, you used the force. Like they really, yeah. I truly have never thought about my cells. You need to spend some time thinking about them.

Like, yeah, I mean, this is very foreign to me of like, what are my cells thinking? I don't know. Yeah, actually when you put it that way, that is kind of a head fuck actually. I'm like, I don't know what they're up to. I just assumed that they were just being, they were just there.

Well, you gotta take care of yourselves because when they start misbehaving. True. You don't want the bad cells, because that leads to what? The cancer, right? Yeah, sure. I guess you could put it like your body intelligence,

like what your body knows, like does your... Well, so having no information, would you guess that yourselves are... Know the difference between like, are you, you watch sports, right? So like when a team that you support wins and you feel that elation, do you think it's almost like you won?

Like I'm part of the team. I definitely get like way too into it. And I have watched the entire season. I watched like the World Series and suddenly I'm like screaming at the television. Yeah. And like so invested in it. That in that moment, it does feel like

my cells are there part of the game. I am not that person. Even like with the Super Bowl, when you guys all watched, you're like, I get into it. To me, it's more of a social gathering and I'm happy to have friends and family over and have our nachos and chat. And like if somebody scores, I'm like, oh great.

And then I find out that's not our team, but it doesn't matter to me. Like I think it's awesome. Like I love going to see Max and Finn play basketball and baseball and all their sports and stuff, but I'm certainly not a parent that is screaming at them on the sidewalk. They're like, why is Tick cheering the opponent scoring?

You're like, everybody wins. Yeah, I don't know. I just, I really, I love having people over for things like that, but I don't feel connected to it. I'm like you, Fortune, where I can not follow the whole, like the European Cup soccer. I was on vacation with my girlfriend at the time and then a couple who I used to date.

And there was this whole like sexual. Wait, go back? Yeah, rewind. I used to date this. There was like, you used to date a couple. Yeah, I had been dating this couple. Nice. And then.

Go back. And how do you end up dating a couple? We have some follow-up questions. Yeah. They were my. I mean imagine if I just casually. You and I are very boring. We are so boring.

I was just telling that to Stephanie the other day. I was like, I love that I don't have complicated stuff going on in my life. That I don't have to remember any weird things or, you know, like I just, at any given hour of the day, I'm shuffling around the house, I'm petting the cats. I feel that way now, I do. Yeah, I think there's no better feeling.

How was it dating a couple? I was a friend of mine and I'd always had a crush on him and then he was dating this amazing woman and then I think we were just at a party and we all got really drunk and then she came up and was like, can we make out? And I was like, well, what what's he going to think? She was like, he's fine with it. And I was like, is he? And then he was like, yeah, I am.

And then we were all anyway. And then we all hooked up and it was so good that we were like, we should do this again. And then we started like, whoa, how long were you dating? This was like on and off kind of whenever I was single for five or six years. Did you ever get into like a group argument or like, no, I wanna go see this movie. Right. No, it was one of the healthiest romantic things

I've ever had. It was kind of casual still, right? Like you guys- Did you say, I love you? I mean, I? Like you guys, did you say I love you? I mean, I do love them. Or did you say I love yous? I love yous. I love yous.

I love you guys. No wonder you can't watch Netflix without things happening. Without chilling. You just have a lot of options. One funny thing did happen where me and the woman were like kind of making fun of him because he was so silent. Me and the woman.

Me and the woman. Sounds like a real special place. Me and the woman. Where she's landed in your heart. We were like, you're so silent during sex. Like you're really, you don't say a word. And we were like, say something like kind of dirty. And he goes, I'm the luckiest man in the world.

That was what he said. And we were like was what he said. And we're like, what an angel. He really was. Yeah, what a sweet, we love, yeah, it was really nice. And by the way, this, we don't ask out of judgment. It's more like Tig and I are so boring and want to know. Speak for yourself. You are too.

That we are envious of May's full life. I think they are still, they are still open. that we are envious of May's full life. I think they are still open. They're married now and they're still in an open marriage and it really works for them. They're one of the only examples I know where it really seems to work for them. Well, you know how it works for people is that they're open and honest about it.

The ones that don't work are the ones that are in an open thing and they're still being secretive. I've heard of that quite a bit. Yeah. I mean, that is always the answer to everything is being as honest and upfront about everything. And then things shake out. Yeah, I have no judgment.

I find it fascinating because I am not built for that. Yeah, at all in any way, shape or form. It doesn't speak to me, but it's more like, whoa, tell me everything. Yeah, I'm more fascinated by the workings of it. It's really like, it really has evolved for me. And I think it depends on who I'm with, how I'm feeling, but yeah, anyway,

so I was not seeing them anymore and I had a girlfriend and all four of us went on vacation to Greece and it was during the European Cup final and there was this kind of thing in the air like are we all gonna hook up? And it was like the last night of the vacation and we kind of were all like, yeah, we're going to and then we sort of, the four of us did sort of hook up. But we were like, okay, to be continued because we have to watch the European Cup final between England and Italy. And we're in this beautiful Greek village and everybody's gathered watching it on screens outside.

Nachos. Nachos abounding? Does that work? It doesn't matter. Nachos abound. And it was so crushing. They lost in the final penalty kickout. No! Exactly!

No! It's always a heartbreaker. And it was like, we just couldn't hook up after. We were so depressed. I bet. Your cells were bummed. Our cells were like we've lost your people. Fully turned off.

I can't imagine what situation I would be in where I'd be thinking, are we all gonna hook up? Yeah, I was thinking that too, Tig. I go, there's no situation I've been in where I'm like, is everyone thinking what I'm thinking? Well, would you have your headset on, Fortune? Yes. I see you, I in my headset.

So it sounds like May and I believe that yourselves can. I did too. I thought you said you couldn't. No. Well, the sports specifically doesn't get revved up. I don't get revved up. I'm revved up for the nachos and the friends and the conversation and animals coming in and visiting.

But isn't that kind of like the, when you watch your kids watch a movie or read a book and they get, their imaginations are so active that it's like they are feeling it. They're in the story. I think that's the power of storytelling. Maybe their cells don't really, they're like at Hogwarts in their mind, you know?

Well, should we hear what Jeff has to say? Yes. My answer is, I don't think our cells know the difference. I think some of my best experiences never actually happened, but vicariously, I felt as though they did, therefore they did. There you are. I think that's right.

Is that what we were saying? Yeah. Yes. Yes, mad, mad scientist fortune. Did we say that? We were all on the same page with that and a banana. Oh no, things are really turning around for us. I know, are we gonna lose all the fizzling friction

if all three of us are just on the same page? Yeah, I really enjoy two against one. We'll find plenty of other things that we are not on the same page about. Also, Jeff's video shows him really looking like he's in a jungle. Mm-hmm. I mean, is he ever just like indoors?

He must be in Fiji a lot, because they film two seasons a year. Whoa, two seasons a year seems like a lot. It seems like a lot. Do you think he's still enjoying it? Yes, I honestly do. That's awesome. But I hope that if he's not,

I don't ever want to know that. Right, yeah. He's such a big part of it, and he seems really passionate. There is nothing better to me than, and I've probably said this on here, but I say it all the time, when people love their job. Right.

You know? Like I just, I feel a sense of freedom even when a stranger tells me that they love their job. A sense of freedom. Yeah, I just, I love knowing when people feel free and happy and- Yeah. What's such a big part of their life? Huge part and so if you're happy in your relationship if you're happy in your job

And I don't know you and you're telling me that I'm like, ah, I'm so happy to hear that. That's so nice Yeah, I love it. I don't care who you are If you are are into that and exactly what Fortune's saying, this is a massive chunk of your life. And if you're happy, I don't know why it makes me so happy. It's one of my favorite things to learn about people is that they're happy. Well, honestly, I think that's why I never got too bummed

like in the beginning of my career when I was working so hard and no traction was happening. I was like, well, at least I know what I want to do. And seriously, no traction was happening, fortune. Yeah, like nothing was happening. Like nothing was going on. Truly nothing. But I thought half the battle

was just knowing what to work towards. And I thought about how many people don't even know what they want to do. And to me that would have been more difficult aimlessly trying to get success or traction and not even know for what. Oh my God, I was driving around in a hatchback from like North Dakota to South Dakota to, you know,

Idaho camping between gigs and making $75 a night. And I was like, oh my Lord, have I found a loophole in life. This is magical. Yeah. Yeah. It's, I mean, that's why when I think about our kids, if anything they said they were gonna do, as long as it was, you know, not illegal

and they were gonna die for sure, I would be like, I am on your side. If you are excited and passionate. Yeah, when people light up like that, it's so contagious. Oh my God, yeah. Yeah, maybe that's why I love Survivor so much because it's like, I love games and I love escape rooms and like, I can just imagine if I'd created a format

like that in my life was just, you know, watching people go through that. Yeah, I think I'd be pretty pumped. Yeah. Well, and if people are listening that don't love their job, I hope that you can find a, I don't know, a way to make a, make a new move or something because find the, yeah, or find the join. It changed the job in some way that it's, yeah, but oh man, it's hard though, isn't it?

I kind of had to do that with Los Angeles because I kind of reached a point where I was not really feeling it anymore. And I was thinking, oh, we should move and give Max and Finn a new start in maybe a safer, cleaner city and you know, that kind of thing. And then, and then Stephanie and I really talked about it. And it's like, they are so happy.

Right. They love their school. They love their house. They love their friends. They love their family, their neighbors. They love their neighborhood. And it's like, why would we need to pull them out of here? Because of these ideas that we've made up.

But it's been fun in the past six months for me to have to shift my mind and look at LA all over again in a brand new way. Yeah, and fall in love with it again. That's cool. Or for the first time. Yeah, it feels good. Yeah, we fall in love with it again. That's cool. Or for the first time. Yeah, it feels good. Yeah, we kind of went through that too.

You did? I think a lot of people did, and especially at pandemic times. For sure. Are we in the right place? Or is life what we thought it would be? We thought about some other places and tried them on for size,

even just a little mini, a week or something. And then we kept being like, no. We kept going back to LA, no, this, this is home. Well, and that was kind of a moment for me where I had to kind of. Stephanie was the one that said, I don't want to move. We need to stay here. And I was, I was, I was frustrated at first, but by the next day, I was like, I think you're right.

You know? You're like, I'm so relieved actually at not having to move. Well, it wasn't even relieved, it was just, she was right. And she was right. And it was an emotional moment for us. Like we actually teared up because I think she was thankful that I saw that and admitted it to her.

And it felt good to give that and be like, you are 1 million percent right. And I was making every move to get us out of here. I felt like that when I guessed correctly about the chicken crossing the road and you said, you're right. You're like, that's right, man. We both teared up.

We both teared up. We both teared up. Well, this was a fun episode. Yeah. It really was. It always is, you guys. What a podcast. What a podcast. No mess, no fuss. And what a guest. Thank you, Jeff.

Thank you, Jeff. Thank you, handsome Jeff. I hope to meet you one day. Yeah, I'll see you backstage at SIA again sometime. See ya at SIA. is what I meant to say. I'm just gonna be trolling those hiking trails looking for you. Oh, before we promote anything,

I wanna remind or share with our brand new listeners, the most important thing you can do is subscribe to our podcast. So go find the show online and click the subscribe button. If you don't know how to do it, I don't know, Google it or call Fortune directly and ask her. Yeah. And go, go back and listen to old episodes too. There's some, there's some good ones. I want to do that.

Is that narcissistic? I don't know. I mean, you know, I think it'd be more narcissistic if you fast forwarded every time Fortune and I spoke. Yeah. I have heard it's guaranteed laughs. Guaranteed laughs. Also subscribe to our YouTube channel. You get to see our handsome faces,

these pretty little lady, handsome faces and pretty little they-dies. Yeah, and Fortune's shoulder pads today. My shoulder pads today. Those are good looking. And my, what would you call this you guys? What do we call it? A radio headset.

It's a radio headset with my mic. When I travel, I use this guy. It's so good looking. A headset with a microphone attached to it. Can I take your order? If you're ever shopping at Old Navy or going through a fast food drive-through. Large khakis to the front.

Large khakis to the front. Oh my God, that would be so fun to go into any store and just get on their microphone and just say large khakis to the front. Large khakis to the front. Does anyone have anything coming up? I just have two shows left of my tour. It's a little casino situation, Niagara Falls, New York,

July 27th and August 10th at Charlestown, West Virginia, the Hollywood casino there. I'm gonna be filming in Toronto, like the rest of us, and I'm gonna be coming back to Los Angeles and we'll be planning on doing some shows at Dynasty Typewriter and Largo. So go to tignotaro.com if you wanna catch me in Los Angeles. And I also have some sporadic shows around,

which will also be listed there on the website. Also, just a reminder that we have a handsome streaming live on August 24th. We're gonna be reuniting at the Danforth Music Hall in Toronto, Canada. And you can get your ticket now to watch the show from anywhere in the world. Just go to our social media pages for the ticket link.

A ticket also gets you access to watch a replay of the show for one full week. So go to any of our handsome social media pages and get your ticket now for Handsome Live August 24th. Until next time. Keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Tig Notaro, May Martin, and Fortune Themester.

The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com. Follow us on social media at HandsomePod. Home shopping season is upon us. Whether you're buying a new home or an existing homeowner, you're going to want to save. Home insurance doesn't have to be a hassle with Allstate. Check Allstate first and you could save $574 on your home insurance. You're in good hands with Allstate.

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