Handsome - Mindy Kaling asks what makes us cry

Episode Date: July 9, 2024

Mindy Kaling asks what schmaltzy stuff makes the Handsome hosts cry in an episode that's also chock full of laughs... from Fortune's wedding officiant to the Statue of David's fig leaf!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media: @handsomepodMerch: handsomepod.comWatch on youtube: youtube.com/@handsomepodEmail the show: [e-mail] Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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That's right. Handsome streaming live from Canada, anywhere in the world on August 24th. It's going to be a major in-person reunion for us. And we can't wait for you to be a part of it too. I got to decide what I'm going to wear. I'm getting really pumped. Oh yeah. What are you going to wear? I don't know. it's summertime in Toronto, so I gotta think.

So nude? Yeah, I gotta think something new. So get your tickets and come join us or yeah, watch it from anywhere in the world. Just go to our social media pages for the ticket link. The show is August 24th and we'll see you there. Handsome pot. Chattin' with friends on the Handsome Pod.

Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod. Cheers. Cheers. Welcome to the Handsome Pod. Good morning. Good morning. I'm Fortune Feimster. I don't know if you needed to know that.

No, I do. I'm, my memory is going. And who are you, little guy? I'm May Martin. you needed to know that. No, I do. My memory is going and who are you little guy? I'm May Martin. I'm Tig Notaro. Oh my gosh. You're handsome. Yeah, I was saying good morning, but you're already into lunchtime hour over there.

Yeah, but I slept in, I had a show last night, so I slept in, so it feels morning to me. I just found a place that has a biscuit. And I love biscuits and they're not easy to find in Canada. No, that's unusual. And this tastes like a red lobster cheddar bay biscuit. Where's the place? At a coffee shop.

Damn. Which coffee shop? Yeah. Oh God, I don't remember the name of it. Well, you just know there's a biscuit. It had castles in the name. Castles? Yeah.

White Castle? No. Yo, I discovered this place called White Castle. So that made me very happy. It reminds me of home. My breakfast, and in fact my morning, I think think I've been excited to tell you guys because I think oh yeah I think I'm gonna garner a lot of like you know approval and support from you guys. Oh my god. Were you treading water?

Well so I'm in Santa Barbara just since last night. This morning what did I have when I woke up? Wild blueberries. Your fave. Takes wave. With steel cut oats. Since last night this morning. What did I have when I woke up wild blueberries? Steel cut oats how amazing was it so amazing like raisins it was so like fresh and clean and good Yes, sir a splash like some almond milk, but then I tried water for 15 mins Let me tell you I was zonked. I don't know how you're doing an hour. I've never tried water before. I am wiped. Really? After 15 minutes?

Yes. That is precious. I know, I don't know if my cardio. But it's a good start. Yeah. Oh, look at you being positive. Well, I think I started with 15 is what I'm saying. I thought I'd be fine, cause like I lift weights,

but I guess my cardio is garbage. I was like. Well, I started at 15 as well. Yeah. And then I moved up in 15 minute increments. Okay. Did Parvati join you? No, she was sleeping.

What made you decide? I just, I woke up, I couldn't sleep. I woke up super early and we're in this hotel and the pool was empty and it's heated. And it's kind of like a cold day. Like it's gray and I thought, damn, that looks good. I don't like- I love a nice heated pool.

Yeah, I could have done laps or something, but I was like, this'll be, yeah, I wanted to see what it was like. At what point did you start to get miserable? Oh, pretty quick. Pretty quick I was like, I'm bored. And then- That's when I listen to a podcast or something.

Yeah, next time, yeah. So there will be a next time. Yeah, now I'm like, it's a challenge to myself. I gotta get up to an hour, but I don't know. Wow, I can't wait to follow this story. I don't have a pool, so it might be like 20, 25 that I'm- You can go jump in mine. Really?

You can jump in mine too. While you guys are not there, I'm going to scale the wall. Jax will let you in. She's home. I'll give you the code. Great. Now it's a competition. Yeah.

Who's pool are you going to get into? What neighborhood are you in? I could do both in one day. That's so cool. When you've been healthy eating blueberries, I'm like, I had a biscuit. Now, may I have more questions? What else was in your oatmeal? Talk to me about it.

Well, and I'll say like, I think the reason I wanted to be really virtuous was we got to this hotel last night and I think we drank like a bottle and a half of red wine last night. And it was like, we were so thirsty. And we had like a loaf of focaccia with olive oil and then like a full three course meal.

So I woke up feeling rotten and like rotten and I needed this. So I had, there were simply raisins, splash of almond milk and some sliced almonds. And then we're talking blueberries, wild blueberries and blackberries. I think I know what hotel you're at and that's a nice romantic getaway.

It's nice. We just both are, yeah, we can work from wherever and we're about to be apart for a while, so. And so are we not saying what hotel? Well, I guess by the time this comes out, people can swarm it. You will be gone. Yeah, look. Isn't it a Belmond? Well, I guess by the time this comes out, people can swarm it. Look, yeah. Is it a Belmond?

Yeah, El Encanto. Yeah, I stayed there. Yeah, it's nice. It's really nice. Yeah, super nice. I didn't get in the pool when I was there, though. That big mistake. I didn't know about the treading water yet.

I guess who did get in the pool? You did. Aessa did. They're very dog You did. Yes, I did. They're very dog friendly. Biggie had a blast. Yeah, Biggie had a blast. They had a dog menu. I love that.

So we ordered him chicken and rice off the dog menu. The only rule was the dogs can't sit in your lap, which is fair. So they brought out a giant dog bed for him. What, and pulled it up next to the table? Yeah, on the ground. I love that. That is fair. So they brought out a giant dog bed for him. And pulled it up next to the table? Put it on the ground. That is hilarious. Like how do you decide on this rule here? I know. They're like, he can have his own menu. Do not put him in the chair. And his own bed.

Yeah. The bed was like the biggest dog bed I've ever seen. That is hilarious. When we pulled up yesterday, I was like, wow, this I've ever seen. That is hilarious. When we pulled up yesterday, I was like, wow, this is beautiful. And there were all these people coming out of like a wedding reception and they were all kind of staring at us

and they looked really miserable. And I was like, what a miserable wedding. And then it turns out it was a memorial and I felt real fun. Oh. You're like, I wish these people would have more fun. Yeah, I literally, oddly was like, I hope my wedding's not like that.

They're so depressed. That's an odd place to have a memorial though too. Totally. Because I don't know, don't be bumming the guest out. When people are treading water next to you. Hey guys, can you move that memorial over a little bit? You're bumming us out. A little more, a little more.

My dog, Shani, is churning rice. You're bumming my dog out. I have some weird news. Great. I was invited to something that is really interesting. The Met Gala. Bit of a curve ball. A threesome. I was invited to something that is really interesting. The Met Gala. Bit of a curve ball. A threesome.

What did you say Met Gala? We have Met Gala, threesome. I'm gonna say seance. Oh, a seance? There's no world you're gonna guess this. Something for animals. No. A doggy for animals. No. A birthday, a doggy birthday party.

No. The opening of a new bird sanctuary opened by Maura Tierney. Oh. Yes. I knew I'd guess. Carrie Russell has invited you to her home for lunch. No, I have been invited There's I guess some other comedians that were invited to this

To The Vatican Yeah, what yeah mean well the Pope, you know, does like, yeah, I got an invite from the Pope. Oh my God. He does his audiences, you know, where he speaks to the people and he's doing one on humor and the importance of humor and changing minds. Wow. My God.

Are you going to go? I wasn't going to, but then I got, you know, Jim Gaffigan called and was like, hey, I'm going. He was like, are you going? And I said, oh. What are you, a big Catholic, that tracks. I was raised Catholic, but in a very non-Catholic way.

And are you allowed to go? Well, I was invited. You gotta go. Well, also was invited. You gotta go. Well, also. Well, so now I'm going to, because I was like, well, you know, there's a gaggle of people going and. Yes, this is gonna be an insane story,

and you're gonna be with a random group of comedians in Rome, like that's hilarious. Is this summer? It's in a few weeks. Oh my God. Oh. What are you gonna wear? You a pretty little lady? Are you gonna have your heels on?

I don't know what I'm gonna wear. I guess, you know, maybe I'll wear. They don't be letting them dykes up in that Vatican, you know. You know, wear a suit and a fake mustache. Yes. Will you get to meet him personally, do you think? I believe so.

I don't think so. Fuck off. Yeah. There don't think so, yeah. There must be a protocol, like you gotta curtsy or like kiss his hand or something, I wonder. Tug on his robe. Tug on his robe. I mean, people be lining up for hours trying to just kiss his hand.

Yeah, that'll be me. So if you get a chance to have like a moment alone with him, the thing that I would love to get some intel on is he- Do you want me to say your- This little tranny little cowboy. No, what did you say to- Oh, your legacy will be great. Your legacy will be great.

Listen, you might- Oh my God, I'm going to say that and I'm going to record myself saying that. Yes, because you think you're going to be cool and then you're going to be starstruck and you're going to say something. I feel confident I'm not going to be starstruck. I'm confident of that too. I wouldn't be starstruck with Obama. That's what I always tell people. That wouldn't even... I don't think you're starstruck with much of anyone. The Pope is no Taylor Day. Yeah, there's certain musicians that can, you know, take your tigs. So Tig, a few years ago, maybe this was 10 years ago now, he had an audience with Obama.

And right after he had the audience, he came out and he made a statement saying, if aliens arrive and are real, then I just want everyone to know they're under God's remit. Like, they're also children of God. And it was so clear to me that he'd just been briefed that aliens are real. That he knew they were real. Yeah. So please ask him. Okay. If aliens come, guys, let's, you know, I know we're good at treating people who are different

really well. Yeah. Can we also give that grace to aliens. Yeah. And do I need to learn this in Italian? You know, I'm also Italiano. Italiano. Oh my God, yes, of course.

Oh, you're going to need some good Italian over there. Yeah. Oh my God. Are y'all going to make a trip of it? We're going to go to like some other places in Italy? I'm just going by myself. Oh my God. Because I'm just going by myself. Oh my god. Because I'm gonna be in New York. So I'm gonna go from New York over and then okay so the audience

is at 9 30 in the morning. This is so jet setter of me. But on the same day Rufus Wainwright, who is a friend, he is doing a performance in Paris that night. Oh my God. So I'm gonna fly from Rome to Paris on the same day to catch Rufus's show that night. Wow, you are a jet center. I thought May was fancy, but now you're fancy. That's cool.

Well, that's the premiere of Rufus's show and he had invited me to it and I was like, oh, I don't think I'm gonna make it. And then when I got invited to go to the Vatican, I was like, how on earth is it that I have two invitations on the same day and one's in the morning and one is at night? I'm gonna make this happen. So. Wow, that'll be cool.

And Stephanie was very much like, you gotta go. You don't have to go. Our whole family would have gone, but our sons were selected for club baseball travel team. So they are so excited that they get to travel to other cities. Yeah, what overnight, like with a chaperone? No, but that's the thing is it's only like an hour,

hour and a half, the cities. And Max is like, we get to travel, yes! Oh my God. We're going to Bakersfield. Yeah, truly, it's that kind of stuff. That's cute. So they're gonna be in their travel tournament. Yeah, they're like, the Pope's cool and all,

but we got a game. Yeah, we got a game. And I'm only gonna miss a few of their games, so I'll be back in time to catch the rest of the tournament. Oh, good. When Stephanie was like, you must go. Yeah, you gotta go. For a beat, I did think that just getting the invitation

was enough to kind of be like, oh, you know, cool, I got invited to the Vatican, you know? But now it's like, I'm going to seal this deal. You can get another, an hour long special out of this called The Pope and Me. Imagining you with the Pope is pretty hilarious. It's really funny. So you would both go if you were invited to the Vatican? Yeah, I guess I would.

I mean, yeah, I guess I would. I, yeah. I would go because, you know, it's just, that's a very rare invite and for sure. I went with my family and went to Rome when I was a kid and we went to the Vatican and all I remember is being like overwhelmed by the opulence. It was so much that it almost made me nauseous because you're like, I think they stole all

this stuff. And it's like the level of gold and rich and priceless. It was just overwhelming. But it was pretty wild seeing that. You know the famous paint that- Sure. Finger to finger. Oh man.

I can't believe that just happened to me. Who's getting fingered. Finger to finger. Oh man. I can't believe that just happened to me. Finger to finger. Fortune Marie. I was on like a game show, like a Jeopardy style game show in England. And the question that got me voted out was where is that painting? Is it the Sistine Chapel? It's the Sistine Chapel fortune. And I wish I'd known that.

I said, I said the cathedral in the Vatican and they wouldn't accept that answer. I'm pretty good at Jeopardy. You know what I mean, that painting. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I went to the Vatican when I lived in Spain. Oh, you did? Oh, boy, Fortune Spain days are coming back.

Was it a guided tour with you and a bunch of people? No, it was me by myself, just walking around. Oh yeah, like your little, I need to make friends meetups. Yeah, just like, I'm alone traveling, so I gotta, back then I was like, I need to see all the things I've been reading about in school, so. I was surprised at how tiny the statue of David was. Tiny, is it really?

I thought it was small. Yeah. I can't remember. Now I'm picturing like a tiny little like paperweight size. No, I mean, it's like a human size. I just, I don't know. It just seems so massive when you see it. Yeah.

And then there was this wiener. I had not seen any wieners. Fortune Marie, how dare thee? The statue of David's wiener? Yeah, this wiener, I had not seen the new wieners. Unfortunately, Marie, how dare thee. The statue of David's wiener? Yeah, this wiener's pretty, seems like it was pretty accurate. He doesn't have like a fig leaf over it? I can't remember.

She doesn't know the difference between a wiener or a fig leaf. And I'm sure all wieners had a fig leaf on them. Well, when the wind blows, you know. leave on them. Well, when the wind blows, you know. So I've been sleeping on this Blissy pillowcase.

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I want as far away as possible, but I'm not growing up Catholic. I don't, you know, I didn't get dive too deep into the Catholic. Yeah, you don't have that all time religion. I didn't dive too deep at all. But I do have family friends that are very Catholic and conservative. And I told them I was invited and they of course were beside themselves and excited and just felt like it's good to show up as a gay person.

Yeah, for sure. Because even as Catholic and conservative as they are, there was that like, you should definitely be a presence there in the gay community. Yeah, absolutely. Could you take him a handsome tee? Could you take him a muscle tee? Yeah, do you think we should give him the one with our faces on it? This is handsome or should we give him the muscle tee that says keep it handsome?

I have a better idea. How about a propeller hat? Cause doesn't he wear one of those little, uh, what is that little? Yeah, he wears a little, uh, Pope hat. He wears a Pope hat, doesn't he? Yeah. Yeah. Do you think you could get a question from him for the pod?

Oh my God, that would be so incredible. To have a question from the Pope. We have no idea what he's asking us. Oh my God. Don't you think you three need husbands? Do you three want to repent? This week we have Kelly Clarkson, next week it's the Pope actually.

Pope Francis. After a lot of requests from our listeners, we did finally get Pope Francis. Next week, the Pope. He's also with CAA, so it was easy to reach out to his team. He's actually with Gersh now. He left CAA after the merger, and it's like, I'm going a little.

We will be ready to hear about this journey. Yeah, yeah. I mean, what if you come back and you're like, fully, you're like, I was deeply moved and I'm fully Catholic again. Yeah, I guess I've been wondering about that too. I want to take communion. Yeah, we'll know when you log on and you're in a robe and. I honestly don't think it's going to work.

Really? No, no. You think you're pretty. and a robe and... I honestly don't think it's gonna work on me. No, no. You think you're pretty... I think I'm pretty set in my ways. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's exciting.

I can't wait to hear about that. Well, I can't wait to hear about your treading water. What I'd like to do is surprise you guys with footage of me treading water in your pools when you didn't know I was there. Well, you know, it's funny because an ex of mine, years ago, we were on a road trip and her aunt lives in St. Paul and she was out of town. Her aunt was out of town when we were driving through and we had all of our camping equipment and we decided we were just jump her fence and set up the tent in her backyard.

And we took pictures of ourselves in her backyard camping. And then, of course, had to get the film developed. And then we mailed the pictures to her without her knowing. That was pre ring cameras. And that so good. That was pre-ring cameras. That was correct. Yeah, that's amazing. You could just camp in someone's yard. And I did. I did it.

Do you like sleeping in tents? I haven't done that in years. I mean, this was, I was probably 21. Oh, okay. You know? I think I've said it before, but I hate tense. Me too, I gotta say. And I probably said the opposite on this podcast before,

but in this moment, I'm being real. Did you have some experience to make you change your mind recently? No, I just, I wanna be someone that likes it. And as a Canadian, I feel pressured to be an outdoorsy, but I hate waking up feeling all crusty and confused. Like your back's killing you. Yeah.

And I'm like, why are we doing this? Well, I think that the older I've gotten, the more I struggle with my sleep. Just so, it's rough. And I think that there's no world I would fall asleep in a tent these days. Yeah. Do you use a white noise machine?

No, I would, but the woman I'm heavily involved with cannot stand white noise. Oh, I'm the same. I can't, I don't like any noise. Really? I just use earplugs. Oh yeah. And so when I shove those in my ears, it really makes a massive difference.

Yeah, I need white noise like, like so loud, just drowning everything out. When I was in college, I was given a room, that was when you were like giving a roommate and I've always been like very, like I don't like any noises, any like, I like it pitch dark. Yeah. Same.

And, you know, you're just kind of like whoever you're assigned to, you're like, that's your person. And on the first night, she goes, she sits on my bed, which already we're like, whoa, this is a lot. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. And she goes, I just wanted to tell you that I kind of do this thing where I hit my head on my pillow to go to sleep.

And I said, what? And she's like, I hit my head on the pillow to go to sleep. And I'm like, okay. Like, I don't really understand what's happening. She goes, I also listen to music. I go, well, this is a lot. But let's try it for the first night and we'll go from there. So she turns on her music like a jam box, whatever they're called, stereo thing.

And I'm like, first, already I'm like, well, this sucks because I don't want to go to sleep to music and she lays on her bed and she is on her side and she just starts banging her head on her pillow like no boom boom boom like non-stop for like 30 minutes. Like the exorcist. I'm holding myself in the corner like, who is this? Who is this? Like welcome to college, oh my God. We lasted one week together.

And then did you kick her out or what? Well, she didn't like that. I was like, can you use headphones? Like, and can you maybe not, you know, give yourself a concussion every night? Yeah. So she was annoyed with me. I was annoyed with her. So we both were like, yeah, this is not, we're not each other's. And so thank God they, she found another friend who loved to bang heads on pillows.

Found another head banger. Yeah. So it was mutual. She wasn't trying to stay with me either. So you did not keep in touch? No. I mean, she was very eccentric. She was like, you know, before she told me about the head banging, she was telling me about the shrine in her backyard, all of her dead cats. And I was like, oh my god. Well, that's not going gonna help me sleep either.

We're just different. Yeah. But I'd never experienced anyone literally banging their head like pretty high off the ground as a way to go to sleep. I know it's a self-soothing thing that people like will smack their foreheads or something.

I wonder why, maybe it's like in the instant that you hit yourself. You mean they smack their forehead? Yeah, I dated someone who did that. To go to bed or just in general? How have I been around for 53 years and I haven't... Yeah, I don't think she did it as an adult, but she told me that she did it as a child a lot and as a teen, like a sort of rhythmic slot. Like I guess that that would be soothing because you have no thoughts in the second that you make impact with your head. But I don't know, man. The fact that

this girl didn't recognize that her version of going to sleep was the abnormal version. Like she's like, you're weird for wanting it silent. Dark and silent. Yeah. I've only run into, oh, I like it this temperature. I like it this temperature. Yeah. Right, right. Like, cause I didn't go to college. I always couldn't imagine that thing

of having a sharing a room with someone. Like having a tiny room too. Yeah, cause you probably had your own room at home. Yeah. Most likely. Cause that's the thing. It's like, you're not in another room. You're like, literally like my bed's here, your bed's here.

I know and people are meant to be like experimenting sexually, bringing people back. Well that did not happen for me. But it's wild, you're like just... No sock was put on any door in my room. Is that a thing, sock on the door means? I don't know, back in the, you'd always hear guys be like, don't come in my room if there's a sock on the door. And that means there's hanky panky going on, Tig.

Oh my gosh. I went to a very strict Christian college. So like, it was- I'm amazed the Pope didn't invite you. It was a women's college. Guys weren't allowed in the, like your room passed like nine p.m. during the week and midnight on the weekends. If you were caught with a guy in your room after that, you could get like expelled from school,

which did happen. What if you were caught with a girl in your room, huh? Well, that was a tricky thing that was brought up at one point. Putting lotion on a girl. There was only, that I know of, one out woman in the whole school. And they were all, the people in her hall were like, well, that's not fair because she's got, I was like, well, that is a fair point, you know?

The guys couldn't be in there past the time where she was all, you know. Even if you're not out and you're just getting some closeted hanky panky. Yeah, I did not get any closeted hanky panky. I don't think I invented this, but you said, am I right that you used to play the song leaving on a jet plane in the hallways of your college by yourself? I sure did, man. It just came back to me.

I don't know how women weren't throwing themselves at me. I'm leaving on a jet plane. And were you with part of you, was part of you hoping that one of these girls would hear it, the voice of an angel and be like, who's singing that? God, sure. I'm sure that my closet deep down in my closet of brain, I was like, who's singing that? God. Sure. I'm sure that my closet, deep down in my closet, a brain, I was like, all these girls are walking by, you know, fall in love with me. That is so funny.

It just was me probably annoying the shit out of people. Even if you weren't out and dating, were you making friends though? Oh yeah, I did have a lot of friends. And were you feeling really Christian when you went to that college? No, I mean I didn't even really think about it being Christian. I guess because I was used to that, but now that I think about it, we did have to go to chapel as freshmen once a week. Wow. And oh, and another thing was they, you, you had to go before the judiciary board at the beginning of your freshman year and they were in black robes and you had

to go sign a book that of their rules basically promising to not break these rules. So I guess in hindsight, yeah, it was free Christian. And human beings, we are so weird that we just invent these rituals and this like very theatrical. Sign the code. Yeah, we're drama queens as a species. We're just like put the robe on and sign the book.

Well, even just I was talking to Stephanie about how it always blows my mind that we made up rules. I know. Like, and then people break the rules that the first people made up are the rules that you have to follow. And it's like, I'm making up my own rules over here. Like, who cares about your rules? that you have to follow. And it's like, I'm making up my own rules over here. Who cares about your rules?

The whole thing, if you start pulling that thread, it's like, what? We invented money. We invented, it's so psycho. And my friend's kids are in middle school. And they said to their mom, they were like, so you want me to go and sit at a desk for eight hours a day? And I'm like 12.

And she was like, yeah, I guess. She was like, yeah, that is pretty fucked. But it's like, do you wanna be the parent that is like- Goes against the grain. I know, and then you're worried your kid's not gonna fit in because you're gonna put them in some weird alternative school. But it's like, it is crazy because you're just training them to be part of the system.

But it just blows my mind that the original rules, them's the rules. And it's like, why can't I just be over here making up my own them? And that's what they say when you want to break them. Them's the rules. Them's the rules. If you're a homeowner who doesn't want to deal with switching your home insurance, we understand switching can feel like a lot of work. That's why Allstate is dedicated to making finding a lower home insurance rate as easy and simple as possible. Check Allstate first and you could save $574 on your home insurance. You're in good hands

with Allstate. Not available in every state based on the national average annual savings for new home insurance customers surveyed in 2023 who switched to Allstate and reported savings. Savings vary. Well, should we? Yes. Yeah, let's get to our question.

Okay. Today's questioner is an actress, comedian, writer, and producer known for playing Kelly on The Office and Dr. Mindy on The Mindy Project, which I also had the pleasure of being on that show with Mindy. She has created so many TV shows since Never Have I Ever, The Sex Lives of College Girls. She's got one right now going on Netflix. I mean, she's killing it, but she's on Netflix. I mean, she's killing it. She's on fire.

She's on fire. I've always been appreciative too, because she is truly who got my acting career started in a big way. That's so nice. Yeah. Yeah. I had left Chelsea lately and I had done a couple of pilots. I sold my own pilot. And we were filming the pilot for ABC and one of the writers, Lang Fisher, who she does Sex Lives at College Girls with, or no, she does Never Have Ever with Lang. She was doing punch-ups and she told Mindy, like, you got to check this girl, Fortune out and it was supposed to be a three episode guest star and it turned into a three season

series regular gig. Oh man. Nice. And it taught me all the things about acting, and really helped get me on my way. Nice. That's so nice. And there you are in Toronto with-

Yeah. And I've worked with her like four other times since. Oh, that's amazing. I'm working with her now. I don't know if it's announced yet, but I am working with her on something. I love it. Cool. So cool.

Well, let's hear Mindy's question. Yeah. Hello, my name is Mindy Kaling, and here is my question for Handsome. What is something that is undeniably schmaltzy and even a little embarrassing, but that makes you cry no matter what? Hmm, schmaltzy, like corny, right?

Oh yeah, I like this question. I got, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you guys cry easily at things like movies and TV shows? Um, not easily, just, I don't go crying to cry, but if I'm exhausted and overworked, I will cry out of nowhere for no reason. Yeah. Wow, okay. Good to know.

I feel like I'm just average crier. I don't think I'm hard to break. But I don't think I'm- Weepy. Mm-hmm. Yeah. But I don't think I'm, you know... Weepy at commercials and stuff. No. Yeah. I think my emotions are pretty easy to manipulate. Oh, yeah? I think so, yeah.

I think all the parts where you're supposed to cry, I'm crying. Yeah. I'll sob on a plane watching a movie where it's like someone dies. I read that on planes... Tears down the face. Yeah, it's because of the lack of oxygen people cry more. Seriously, I read that. I have been embarrassed on planes many times just sobbing. Yeah, me too. I have not. Maybe I am more of a hard ass. But I also actually don't really watch things on planes either. Right. So maybe I would be crying. Oh, actually one of my favorite things,

I'm going off the topic slightly. I was sitting next to this elderly couple on a flight and the woman was watching a movie and the husband did not wanna watch. Yeah. And then he continued to interrupt her. Oh my God. What's happening?

Who's this? Oh my God. Oh my God. Didn't have the earphones. She's like, what? And he's like, who's that? What are they doing? Oh no.

And she's like, catch them. And they stole the money and they're going to the blah, blah, blah. Oh my God. I mean, it was so hilarious. So the things that are popping into my head are anytime Tom Cruise cries in a movie, I cry with him. And like there's something about when his eyes, like so Jerry Maguire, end of Jerry Maguire,

I'm crying when he comes in, I'm looking for my wife. I'm dead, you complete me. We live in a cynical, cynical world. I'm with him crying. Then also in Magnolia. See, I thought they didn't know each other well enough to be having that kind of level of chat. That's a great point.

But they are, but they're, what do you mean? They're married. I know, and I feel like they didn't really know each other that well. Yeah, I know what you mean. Yeah. And then also the classic Matt Damon, it's not your fault in Good Will Hunting when Robin Williams says,

it's not your fault. Yeah, that was a good scene. I think it's when men cry, when men cry. So yeah, I lose it. See, a lot of people are very repelled by men crying. Really? Which is wild. Yeah. Men should be able to cry. Agree. Agree. I've just heard of people being like, like they're like, what a pussy. I don be able to cry. Agree. Agree. I've just heard of people being like... Like they're like, what a pussy. I don't want to see a man cry.

What? Yeah. I thought that was a myth, like that men were like, oh, I can't cry because people think I'm weak and women loved when men cry. I mean, there's nothing better. Yeah. All right. Well.

I think lesbians like like maybe like when men cry. They love it. When men are on their knees crying. Yeah. Take that, Mr. Guy. I don't know. Do straight women, straight women are the ones repelled by it or into it? I don't know. I don't want to, I don't want to propagate this. I've heard it from both. Okay. Oh, interesting.

Yeah. Really? I've heard it from both. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Really? I feel like I cry at music a little more. I remember, well, I still cry. Okay.

Stephanie and I walked down the aisle to John Denver's song, Sunshine on My Shoulder. Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy. Yes, that's the one. That take you back? Yes. And I feel like he and his music is considered a little schmaltzy. But one day it just hit me because there's a line

in that song, if I could give you a day just like today, if I could give you anything or something, I can't remember the words, but it's basically I would give you a day just like today. And that line made me think of a wedding. And then it says sunshine on the water makes me happy. And we got married. We're going to get married on the beach in my hometown. And so I just thought, oh, that's perfect. Yeah. And so that song, when I started to tell her about it, and she wasn't familiar with it, I started crying and I was not expecting that just talking about this. Just telling her about it, because I was just picturing it.

And then she was crying, not even hearing the song. Oh my God, oh my God. So she listened to it, and then we had a legit boohoo together. And then to this day, when I hear that song, whenever she and I both hear that song. It gets you. Oh my God, it kills us.

Have you ever seen the footage of Led Zeppelin playing, no, Led Zeppelin at the Kennedy Center Honors and Hart is playing Stairway to Heaven? I have seen that. Yes. Yes. Incredible. Yes. And they're all in the audience watching and they start crying, like Robert Plant

is like putting his finger on his face to stop him crying and that gets me because I'm just like they're looking at their legacy and what they did and the choir comes in and I'm tearing up right now I get goosebumps all right the Kennedy Center honors quite a bit yeah yeah it's a lifetime achievement thing yeah Beyonce doing proud Mary that's pretty fucking great. Tina Turner watching, yeah. Oh, Tina Turner. Barbara Streisand, Oh My Man, at the end of Funny Girl,

when she comes out on stage and that gets me, that makes me cry. And that's pretty corny. Because she has that little break in her voice, she goes, Oh my man, I love him so. I do it at karaoke and it weirds people out. There's this moment in, did you know that movie mask that had Cher? No. Oh, you haven't seen it? No, I only know the mask with Jim Carrey. And I was like, really?

and I was like, really? What part makes you? It's devastating. A mask. And it's so great. Oh my God. It's from the eighties. So Cher's son goes off to summer camp and he has this medical condition.

You can watch the movie, but they're so close. She's a single mom and she's so close to her son. And it's the first time that he's going away and that she's not going to be with him. And he's a teenager and she's, you know, and she's not very educated and a biker and, and she's just trying to write him a letter and she's sobbing to herself just while she's, you know, she's just trying to write this letter and she's really, I don't think she can really write very well even. And then her boyfriend comes over and he's like, what do you want me here? Let me help

you. And he goes to write it. And when she starts crying and she's like, mommy misses you and mommy blah, blah, blah. And when he looks up at her, he just stops writing like in this like beautiful way of like, he can't capture all that she's just pouring out of her heart and soul and then just like holds her. And I mean, I used to struggle to even think about just scribe that scene. Yeah, I'm gonna watch it right after this. It's such a great movie.

And I think the soundtrack is Bob Seeger. Oh, cool. Yes, so cool. So cool. Fortune, is there anything that you could watch right now that would make you cry? I, without fail, anytime there's a movie where someone's dying of cancer, fucking I start sobbing.

I think it stems from my grandmother dying of cancer and being in that experience with her of watching her deteriorate and seeing it take the life from her. And what that experience was. And when you know someone's dying, you face it and talk about it. And we had someone play songs for her, which would be at her funeral. Like you're forced to look at death in a very real way. Yeah. And ever since then, anyone that's dying of cancer in a show, I will like, like more so

back in the day, like now I'll cry. I used to like, like heave crying like, and now I just, I cry, but like even like still magnolias like when someone dies like two terms of endearment Yeah, did you see that? Yeah? Yeah, I mean, isn't that the power of finding Neverland even that? Oh, yeah Yeah, you know, that's like the power of art though Like because we need to cry like that Sometimes you can't even do it when the person is in your life dying and then you see the movie and it triggers something And you're you can let all that out.

That's yeah. Yeah, it'll just get any yeah, or even if it's not cancer anyone dying like they know they're dying or and you're watching the process of the family grieving like any of that stuff just like ah kills me. Yeah. Yeah This is on topic but off topic but on topic. Are you guys I mean, I think you're familiar with Andrea Gibson Oh, yeah. This is on topic, but off topic, but on topic. Are you guys, I mean, I think you're familiar with Andrea Gibson. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Who's an old, old friend of mine. And Andrea is just blowing people's minds. The way that they're handling a stage four cancer diagnosis right now. Just writing and sharing and post, yeah.

And like mind blowing sort of facing mortality. I can't express enough to people that they need to check out Andrea. That is really heroic. There's like a Thomas Hardy poem that says, teach me to live that I may dread the grave as little as my bed, teach me to die. And it's like, yeah, I want to dread death as much as I dread like going to sleep every night. And I want to look at it in the eye. I love that we're supposed to be talking about schmaltzy, corny things that make us. And this is not schmaltzy at all. Yeah.

At all. I mean, this is kind of cheesy in that it's like so unnecessary, but I think I've said this before, but sometimes Jackson out of nowhere will just like think about our dog, Biggie, dying at some point. Yeah, he's talking about that. And I'll start crying, you know?

What am I doing? Why are you doing that to yourself? I can't live life just looking at him like TikTok. Oh my God. Well, this is my first relationship. I don't think Parvo will mind me saying this. My first relationship where like multiple times we've just burst into tears about like

how much we love each other and like how great, how like grateful we are to, yeah, but that is new for me. I'm like, I'm gonna be a cool cowboy. And I'm like, oh God. I think we all feel that way about our significant. About poverty, yeah. We're all, no, I just mean like we all feel that level

of nobody's in a relationship that they don't wanna be in. Yeah, yeah, imagine if one of us was and all the times that we talk about our relationships if one of us was like, yeah, that's fine. Yeah, that's fine. They're okay. Did you guys cry when you decided to get married?

Oh my God, I did. Were you a mess? Oh, did. Oh my God. Actually, I didn't cry. Oh my God. You guys are cool. Oh, my God. I didn't cry. Oh, my God. You guys are cool.

But we were, but we got married in the pandemic. Yeah. Had like four friends there, you know, it was like, the officiant was a stranger in a mask. It just was like different times, you know what I mean? Yeah. A stranger in a mask. It was. It was a, it was a girl from, I think Russia, who we just hired from one of those same day marriage

places. And she was like, do you jacks? Take. Oh my God. Do you jacks? Take. I thought you meant like a mail order officiant. No, it was like, and I made the mistake of, did I tell you guys this?

No. I made the mistake of like, they have like a script and I was like, let me use this up a little bit. But like how I would, you know, say it, not thinking like this is not a performer. She's Russian. She doesn't know us. And I, I, I have the poem. Um, I can't remember.

It's like, may your, um, God, may the sun rise above you. I can't remember. It's one of those like poetic thing. And she's like, but the sun was above the clouds. We should have gotten Andrea Gibson. Yes. Do you have a video for that? Slim?

I'm sure I do. It was slim pickings in the, because this was like thick, thick of COVID. You actually could have gotten me, I'm certified to do weddings. But you might not have wanted to venture out. This is when people were not really even there. I would have done it. Oh, you were so brave.

Because I had been praying, praying, bringing it back to Catholicism, and praying for your love. That's right. So it kind of tookism, and praying for your love. That's right. So it kind of took the like crying part out of it. We kind of were like, what's happening? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. When the potatoes grow. Is that the end of the. And may the potatoes grow. May the first born be blessed. Oh God. Not the second born. Made her firstborn be blessed. Oh my God. Not the secondborn.

May Biggie have a blast. Biggie was our ring bearer and we got married in a patio, or a deck at a house in Malibu, and Jax put the ring on it, like tied it to him, and he walked out to us and immediately shook. No, the ring almost flew out. Hilarious. Oh, biggie.

So, yeah, we weren't like it was hard to get like the emotions super charged. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like Stephanie and I were so emotional when we got married and we're still so emotional when we talk about our wedding. Yeah. Or when music from our wedding comes on. We also played this once we were finished with the ceremony and we were leaving, we played this Bob Dylan song called You Changed My Life. It's so celebratory and full band type Dylan tune. It's funny because at the reception, we were choosing what songs we wanted the band to play.

One of the options was journeys don't stop believing. And I was like, Oh, you got to have that. Stephanie was like, Oh, I can't stand that song. I was like, you don't like journeys. Don't stop believing. And so we went back and forth. And I was like, well, let's just have everybody loves you. You're the odd one out here. And so we did do that and the people that organized our wedding brought out the sparklers during Don't Stop Believing and it actually made the song more magical. And then now Stephanie loves that song because of our wedding and Max and Finn, they heard that song maybe a year ago and we said that it was played at our wedding. Yeah.

They love it so much, and they love that it was played at our wedding. That's cool. So that song that was like a point of contention when we were trying to plan our wedding has now become so massive. You guys invited me to your wedding. I don't know if it was on purpose.

You guys invited me to your wedding. I don't know if it was on purpose. Probably. We went really wide. I couldn't go. It was working. Yeah. I don't remember inviting you, but I believe that we did because we were just like, let's go so wide. Yes. One thing that really gets me is on Survivor, on Parvati's first season, actually on any season that she did, they have like a loved one's visit. And it's now that I know her

and we watched this with her parents and her daughter, we showed like the loved one's visit and it got me, cause Parv part was like 23. She's starving. She's just sliced her finger in half of the machete and it's all bandaged up. And she's emaciated. And then they're like, guys, you final six, we got your loved ones coming. And then her dad, her little dad comes out on the beach and she's so stoic and cool and kind of cool girl that she's so young. And then she sees him and both of their eyes full of tears and just seeing that hug between them

of him being so proud of her and then they win the challenge, which helps, but I lose it at that. Yeah. And could you have almost lost it? Just now. Yes. Yeah. I was like, aww. Jackson, I will be eating sometime and I'll think of some kind of memory or something special or sometimes I'll reflect on the journey of this business or something and my eyes will well up and I'll look at, she's not sentimental in that way and I'm welling up and I just point at myself.

You just point at your eyes? She's like, what's wrong with you? You're like, I's wrong with you? I'm like, I'm thinking the journey of this business. And when you say journey of this business, like that it's hard. Yeah, like I got here with like $25 in my pocket. I'm from a tiny town, you know, like the odds of making it were not in my favor. And if I'll have like some kind of thing that I accomplished that never seemed

possible, if I take that second to sort of reflect on it, I'll just be like pointing at my eyes like, look, oh my God. So nice. And she's like, pull it together. Yeah. Should we hear the answer to Mindy's question? Yes, please. My answer to this question of what is very schmaltzy,

a little embarrassing, but that makes me cry, is the song Coming to America by Neil Diamond. Because when my parents became citizens and they pledged allegiance and took their oath as citizens, when they finished at the courthouse in Massachusetts, they then played the song coming to America and whenever I listened to it, it makes me cry. Um, even though it's, I would say objectively a little bit goofy. That's all.

I love it. Thanks guys. Thank you. Yeah, it is a goofy song, but in the right context, that does feel so electrifying. It has a lot of meaning. I've never heard that song. I'm adding it to the list. I got Mask was shared. We haven't heard Coming to America.

No, and I got Sunshine on my shoulder. I'm about to have a weep today. Yeah, you are. Yeah. Well, when you listen to Sunshine on my shoulder, picture me and Stephanie walking to each other. Can you send me a wedding photo so I can just stare at it while I listen? Yeah. And you know, it's funny is our wedding photo.

My cousin is marrying us and he his pants behind me make it look like I have like swashbuckler boots on. It's so funny. Here, I have to show you this. Can you see how it looks like? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah, it looks like you're wearing like puss in boots. That is hilarious. Like Zorro boots. Yes. Oh, that's such a nice picture though. It is nice and people are always like, what's with those boots?

Well, what a podcast. What a podcast. I mean. I was talking about being emotional. I know. I think it's good to have a little cry here and there, even if it's cheesy. Well, there's gotta be like a biological reason why we cry.

It's got to be good for us. To release. Yeah, like to release those salty tears. What if there was absolutely no reason? That's possible too. It was just a flaw. And for our male listeners, you cry as much as you want. Yeah, girl.

We've got no judgment here. And film it and send it to me. Film it and send it to me so I can... Point at your eyes with the tears and show us. That's what I do. I point at my face. Okay. Okay. So I don't really have anything much to plug in terms of live shows.

You can always get my book or check out my special sap on Netflix. But what do you guys have coming up? Hello again on Prime Video. And I also have shows on my website, tignotara.com, very sporadically doing shows in Los Angeles and around the country. So come on out. I have two shows left. That's it. And then my tour is over.

One is in Niagara falls, New York at the casino out there, um, July 27th and then Charlestown, West Virginia, August 10th at the Hollywood casino. Um, and I got some specials on Netflix. Check them out if you're wanting to chuckle as well. If you're jonesing. Yeah. Yeah, I got other specials too. I mean, whatever.

Whatever. I got them on. There are things out there. Yeah. To watch. Different networks. And check us out. If you enjoy our podcast on our audio,

don't forget we also are on YouTube. We are. So go to our YouTube page. Check it out. You can see Fortune imitating the girl trying to fall asleep by banging her head. Check out YouTube and check out handsomepod.com for merch and gear if you want to support the pod

and rock the gear out in public. And so people go, what the hell's that you're wearing? And how do I get it? And how do I get my hands on it? Jake told us that our very first guest ever, Sarah Zilman, she's rocking a handsome hat. She sent me a text and was like, look what I wear every day.

This is my day in day out. And I said, did May give that to you? And she said, no, I bought it. Oh my God. I know, I was like, why? And it looks so cool on her. She said, take a picture. Wait, we gotta post that.

It's the handsome hat with the rainbow cross. Damn, that's cool. She should rock a little cowboy one too, or Rory could. And she's in Handsome History, our first guest ever. Yeah. Handsome Herstory. Yeah. Awesome. Well guys, our first guest ever. Yeah. Handsome Herstory. Yeah.

Awesome. Well, guys, this has been great. It's been a good one. But all that remains until next time? Keeping it Handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feimster, Tig Notaro, and Mae Martin. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Woulett. Email

us at handsomepod at gmail.com and follow us on social media at handsomepod. Home shopping season is upon us. Whether you're buying a new home or an existing homeowner, you're going to want the best rate for your home insurance. With Allstate, saving is easy and switching from an existing plan is simple and quick. Home insurance doesn't have to be a headache. Check Allstate first and you could save $574 on your home insurance. You're in good hands with Allstate. Not available in every state based on the national average annual savings for new home insurance customers