Handsome - Peaches asks about pets

Episode Date: September 22, 2026

Iconic musician Peaches asks Handsome a question about a part of our lives we all love... pets! Plus Fortune's onion shirt, trying on Tig's spectacles, and an update on Ginger!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTube and HuluThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking that I put a sparkling water in the fridge when I take a sparkling water out of the fridge. My past self's negligence has led to my present self having to drink some room temperature bubbles. Yeah, checking first is handsome. So check Allstate First for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds.

You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential Savies very subject to terms conditions and available. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates Northbrook, Illinois. Handsome Pot. Chatting the friends on the Handsome Pot. Chatting to Friends on the Handsome Pod. Cheers. Welcome to the Handsome Pod.

I'm Fortune Feemster. I'm Tignotaro. I'm Mae Martin. Yeah. We're together again. We're together as friends. Sometimes more than just friends. But nobody knows that because we haven't revealed it until now.

People aren't listening to this part right now. Oh, y'all, the hand drop went quickly. Oh, what a song. We've been working on that one for a while. Yeah, I forgot about it, honestly. We were like, remember, let's not forget to sing that song. Let us not forget. You know, I want to do it again.

I had so much fun I want to. Let's do it. want to do it again. All right. Okay. We're doing it again singing this song that we said we weren't going to sing. And. Let's not give them the whole song.

No, just to our website where we wrote a song. We have a handsome band. We need to put out another song. HandsomeBansom.com. Also, TIG had a great idea, which we do need to implement. And this cannot just be a put it on the list thing. What is it? The GAMCAM.

Oh, yes. Tick suggested that the next time we're in person, we need to do the episode in shorts. In shorts. So that we can actually do the gam cam. Cut to the gam cam and it's just set up at ground level. Or don't even say cut to the cam cam. Gam cam, yes. And then just when we're telling a story, it just pans down and you see my five o'clock shadow legs.

Oh, I love this. You guys, our podcast, are you trying to hold hands again? No, what do you need from us? I wanted to just, I don't know if you guys knew this, but we won some awards. Oh, yeah. Oh, is that what this is?

We're changing lives. And not close. We won two Webby awards. Yes. Wow. Oh, I like this. Oh, whoa, that's good because we want it. We won

Oh yeah, it's a boiling We won the 2006 People's Voice Award winner Whoa Oh wow No, it says award weiner Weiner This was for an individual episode

Belonging and Inclusion So that's that one What does that one say? Now, wait, my question, I have won a Webby before I haven't You have? Yeah, I have What is

the award shape the spring it looks like some quantum uh oh uh device what are we gonna do we only have two awards and there's three of us two against one i do kind of like it how are we gonna figure this out you have it guys you guys keep I was hoping that I want both of them

what does that one to say what do we win that because I want to keep my other webby yeah but one is like the committee and one is the people's vote award. Oh. Okay. Titty committee. The Titty committee voted us and our big old knockers.

Thank you, Webby Awards. That's very cool. That's very cool. And also, my Webby gets lonely sometimes. Yeah. You're going to get both of them? Yeah.

I need to have three Webby Awards. But I have that fun new space behind me now. I know, but you got. It needs a award. You got something. I did. gave me the picture of the Golden Girls. I think you just got to buy a slinky and glue it to a block of wood.

You guys. Anyway, what's going on? Well, how you feeling? I feel good. Yeah? You look great. Thank you. I've been cutting my own hair.

I'm not feeling very confident at the moment. I love it. Before you go any further, my kids just went back to school. Is Alma back to school? Yeah, back to school, yeah. We took them for haircuts. There's a barber near our house. And it's like a $40 barber cut.

Yeah. I think I want my son's haircut. Oh. And it's like it's like a very buzzed kind of short, short, back and sides, buzzed. I think you go for it. I mean, I like your hair as it is. But if you want you, you're welcome. I want to keep you happy.

You are. I'm very happy. Well, maybe I can pass around and show you. Yeah, the haircut. I'm picturing them going and getting the full treatment where they get like a shave and like a hot towel on their face. Uh-huh. Yeah. Well, this is the look.

Yeah, it's just really short. Oh, that is short. Yeah. Very handsome. Do they like it? They are so in. Feeling themselves. It looks cool.

It's a cool haircut. Oh, wow, that is short. Yes. I'm thinking I might do it. buzz? You're going to buzz like that? I might buzz like that. Whoa.

Wait. And that's the natural hair color? Yeah. I might miss your little feathered bangs, though. You might miss my bangs? Your feathered bags, yeah. I'd miss them. I'd miss those.

My hair is turning into a big cotton poof. That's why I start cutting my legs. Mine's so thick like that. And then I think, oh, I can just. Uh-huh. How's my hair, you guys? Always perfect. Stunning.

Just like the award. award. Okay, wait, so you're happy, you're good, you cut your hair. Pretty good. I was saying before we started recording, I don't feel funny at all. Why? But I don't know what that's about. I feel happy, very content.

You feel very happy. Very happy, very content. But you're not in a silly mood. No, I am. Oh, okay. I just feel like I can't. You're just missing the mark every time. I'm like.

You're like, hey, rubber chicken. And everyone's like, nah. That's how I feel. Yeah, when was the last time I said something? funny, I don't know. Like a while ago. You should keep a journal. Katie Cooteric. Katie Cooteric was good. Katie? You're probably still coming down. I'm coming down. That was massive. I think about it all the time. Yeah, that was a good moment. First of all, I think about Katie Couric all the time. And then for her new name. I hope she knows about it. Yeah, you got to text her. I just get always when I

go through customs and they say, what do you do for a living? And I hear myself say, like, because I get nervous going through costumes and I go, I'm a comedian with a really straight face and they're like, sure, okay. They want you to be like, waka, waka. Now, I don't know if this is in one of my specials or not because I can never remember. We'll never know. I will never know. And there's no possible way to know. Never. Who cares, right? But when I first moved to Los Angeles, I was work, I got a temp job at a commercial production company. Yeah. And I was recommended for the job. by my other job working at Sam Ramey's company when I was working there part-time.

Okay. Or as like as a temp job before they hired me full-time. Yeah. So they had heard about this company that needed somebody. So they were like, oh my gosh, because we all loved each other over at Sam Ramey's company.

They were like, we're gonna send you TIG. We love her. You'll love her, whatever. So I show up with that vibe. Yeah. Where I'm like, it's me, guys. I'm here.

And the woman who ran the company answered the door very down to business. Like FedEx goes out every day at four. This is your desk. And I was like, oh, right, okay. And I was trying to catch up and take note of everything she was saying. And meanwhile, I had come from Sam and Rob's company where it was so, we're all still very close. Yeah.

Okay. So I'm just like, oh gosh, you know, there was no welcome-loving vibe from this woman. And any time she was on the phone, she wanted me to get up from my desk, come over and stand next to her and write a note of who was calling, who was on hold. And I had to wait there. It was very much like that. And just beaten down by this woman for three days. Oh. And to the point.

point where I didn't follow her rule and I'd go from my desk. I'd be like, John's on line one. I was like so over this one. So she comes over, we're going through these files and she said, so when you're not temping, what do you do? And I was so excited to turn to her with the life sucked out of me. And I just said, I'm a comedian. I make people laugh. What is she said? Was she? She was so confused. She was so, probably didn't know if you were been serious.

Yeah, she was so deeply confused. That's really fun. And, oh, it was such a joy for me to turn and dump that of like, I am a joyful clown. Yeah, yeah. And I bring everybody joy except you. When you find someone who's clearly not charmed by you in any way at all. Immediately. Like, you have an Uber driver or something.

There's plenty of them. Yeah, and then they're, and then, yeah, that's really fun. I audition once to be a host of the game show. Congrats, Fortune. I didn't get it. I went to check in on Star Maters in a little bit. And I'm, you know, I'm pretty bubbly in general. Very.

And so usually people are kind of disarmed by the accent and the bubbles. Yeah. There's like six people that could not have been less interested, charmed. I knew right away I was like I'm not getting this job These people think I am the biggest stick in the mud Not funny not qualified And yeah they were

So not into me The room was just like Record scratch That was my record But the irony is Somebody else got the job And they had me do a few of the episodes I could not have been more fun

fun, more delightful, once in one of one, a car. Oh, you were a guest on it as you... I ended up because it was like a panel thing. Yeah. I brought the... I brought life to the party.

Yes. Blasted them with you. Blasted them. You showed them. They're knocking on my door, thanking me for saving the show. And I was like, you're welcome. And let's name the show?

I want to know. I will tell you guys later. But yeah, I was like, I get... For whatever reason, and whatever I brought into that room in the original meeting they were not into.

Yeah. Yeah. But I'm also not a person that's bouncing from the walls like I'm just myself which they were not into. But obviously I amp it up a bit, you know, for the cameras.

Oh, I know. I'm saying it. In regular life, I'm just me. I'm just chill. Yeah, it's just you with your little diamond earrings on. That's right. Yeah, that's right. Pumpkin. Catching the life. And look at my shirt

It's onions I thought it was onions And I didn't want to I didn't want to presume Are there There might be mushrooms Capers Maybe there's capers too

Garlic clothes It's a whole Shorri's a whole Short I wouldn't buy I mean this is why I didn't get that job My wardrobe They're like Onion girls out

Obviously This is You would not I'm shocked But so you bought it for yourself, you saw it on a rack? I must have that. Why did I bring this up? I didn't have roasted.

When you drew attention to. Girl, it's so you. But picture me seeing that on a rack. I wouldn't have even seen it on the rack. No, so. You wouldn't have been in that store. They made this. This was made for me for a project.

It was made for it. There's only one in the world. Wait. You request. Did the onions? No, I think it was a long sleep shirt originally. And you ripped the sleeves off. And they made it into a short sleep shirt for me. And I was in such a hurry

to get here. I just... Don't you make excuses. You love your onion, cherry, capers, peaches, garlic clothes. I grabbed two shirts and just hauled ass down here. It's a great shirt for you. Especially with your diamond earrings. There was a minute where I was like, I'm just going to wear my black shirt, but May has on a black shirt. And I was like,

well, that might be weird if we're both just in black shirts. So I was like, I have to wear it. And here you are. And here I am. Well, if I can roast myself. Does it make you hungry? Kind of. Who doesn't want a mix of cherries, onions, mushrooms,

and carrots. The last day I wear it. No. I can't stop. I haven't stopped staring at it since you mentioned it. We want to know what fruits those are meant to be. Yeah, who cares? Is this an onion?

No, what's the kind of onion that's small? Oh, a little bitty onions? A shallot? A shallot? I think it's a shallot. And is that a cherry tomato? That could be a fig. Is it a fig?

Wait, maybe it's figs. Not a hulu. Maybe it's figs. You might be right. I think so. That could also be a giant cave for you. This shirt is wild. You have to, we have to all sign it.

I definitely think this is why I didn't get that job. Well, if I can tell you, which I, and I have to confess, I did say this on stage the other night for the first time. So my apologies, I'm going into a bit. It's fine, go away. But it's not even a bit. It really happened. So I was in Orlando a few months ago, with my friend. Yeah.

And. Mickey. Huh? I don't know see but you have to keep trying I gotta keep trying you gotta keep putting yourself out there

this is the same space I don't know it's a game show I get you one of these shirts I'm all I need is a couple a couple good ones couple capers shirts Mickey was good

Mickey was high pitch good It was good Mickey was there checking all state first could save you hundreds on car insurance not checking that I've got enough coasters for everyone before I have people over for a get-together? All suds. Now I'm a one-person ring-stained prevention crew and every table in my house is code red. Yeah, checking first is handsome.

So check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Today we're talking about a new sponsor of handsome Dipsy. Here's the scenario. I'm winding down for bed and I don't want to just be doom scrolling on my phone or listening to some horrifying true crime podcasts. Dipsy is an app chock full of short, spicy audio stories. Dipsy is the number one app for erotic audio stories created by women for everyone. Dipsy's library has over 1,000 stories written by professional writers and produced with a full cast and professional sound design. So you're

totally immersed in the story. Whatever you're into, there's a story for it. And you can filter by trope or by spiciness and who and what you're into. And right now, Dipsey is giving our listeners their first week free and then 25% off after that. When you sign up at dipsiestories dot com slash handsome. This is an exclusive offer for our podcast listeners. Go to Dipcy's Seestories.com slash handsome for your first week free, then 25% off. That's D-I-P-S-E-A Stories.com slash handsome. Fall is a natural time to get back into a routine. If your hair could use some attention, this fall is a great time to rethink how you're supporting it. Luckily, there's Nutraful. Nutraful is the number one dermatologist's recommended hair growth supplement brand,

and it's the number one hair growth supplement brand personally used by dermatologists. Because hair health isn't one size fits all, Nutriful offers different formulas for both men and women at any age or stage of life. And now the Nutriful women's formula has been upgraded to its most advanced version yet. It's 100% vegan, biotin-free, and comes in a smaller capsule size to make your daily routine easier. See thicker, stronger, faster-growing hair with less shedding in just three to six months. Right now, Nutraful is offering our listeners $10 off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you visit NutraFol.com and Interpromotech-Hansom. That's Nutraful.com spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L dot com promo code handsome.

Okay. You're in Orlando. I'm in Orlando. I'm hanging out with a first. friend of mine. Yeah. Okay. And she says, so, you wear glasses now. And I said, yeah. And I've known her for since I was like 18 or something. And I said, yeah. And she was like, that's like you always wear glasses now. And I said, yeah. And she said, so you went to see a doctor, an eye doctor. And you were told you needed them. So you then went to an eyeglass store and looked around. And I

said, yeah. And she said, and you picked the Stephen King edition. Oh, my gosh. Wow. And I was like, oh, I said, yeah, I guess, yeah, I guess there's Stephen King glasses. And, and I said, you know, I just needed something to help me see. And then I go to the airport. This is like a month ago, sometime over the summer when I was going to Toronto. And, you know, the facial recognition. Yeah. I walk up and I took my glasses off and the woman staying there who worked at the airport, she was, oh, no, no, no, no.

You don't have to take your glasses off. Those are just for stylish glasses. Oh, my God. My Lord. Wait, that seems like a rogue rule from her. They have to be stylish for you to have to take them off. I think she just meant like, you know, fashion glasses. Fashionable.

I like those. Do you? But now that you mentioned. I'm wondering what like the potential of experimenting with different types. Well, just to finish full circle, I tell Stephanie these things. And she, like a day later, she goes, oh my God, I told my mom about, you know, the comment about Stephen King glasses and facial recognition saying you don't have to with this. And she goes, my mother laughed so hard. And then she said, and yeah, why does she wear those glasses?

Oh, my God. And I was like, oh, my Lord. So now I'm very interested, like, what glasses is my face calling? So this never stuck out to you as weird? You just always, you just have had them for a bit, right? Kind of like the onion shirt, it just was used to it. Well, this is fashion shirt. Listen, I definitely should weigh in on what people who are fashion choices are.

I never noticed, I never flagged them as wrong for your face. I never flagged them. And then Stephanie did say, and they're chipped. Have you noticed that? No. No. Do you see the painting? We haven't seen them in person.

In Ohio? I can't really tell that they're chipped from here. Maybe you need glasses. Maybe. Do you want to try them on? Give me the name of your person. Oh, man, this is blurry. Everything's blurry.

How do I look with glasses? Yeah, they're not great. They're not great. I just cemented how not great. great these glasses are. Can I try them? May was like, I don't know. Pass them over to May.

May? Well, maybe May you'll say something funny. When I put them on, I would have pleased to be funny. Of course, makes them look hot. No, I don't think so. Nerd alert. This is, wow, wow. Nerd alert.

Well, your eye, what is your eyesight? Well, my, not my eyes are. I told you my eyesight. I told you it's very bad. Right, right. And I struggle with those on, too. Really? Yeah, you guys are like nothing to me.

Oh my God. I don't mean visually. I just mean as people or. Emotionally, yeah. Nothing to me. Yeah, those glasses are definitely not for you, May. No, they're not. They're not for anyone.

Who are they for? Just so now I'm used to you with these. Well, yeah, and I've gotten used to your capers as you did. It's going to be with me for a long time now. We could roast my fake rip jeans that I, they had their old. Yeah, they're cool. Thanks, guys. They're real cool

You know, you buy them pre-ripped I don't I don't buy any ripped jeans Because I don't want the airflow What? What? Do you really get a lot of air flow Through your pants?

No, because they're really well patched up Why don't you want? Yeah, why don't you want air flow? I don't want breezy knees You know breezy knees? I want breezy nis But it's Go on me

That was the most silly when you have shorts on. Cam cam is what I do. That's right. It's so hot out. You don't want a little cool? No, because if it's hot out, I'm just wearing shorts. I'm not doing full denim.

I ordered some vintage Levi's for like 20 bucks, like 50 ones, and they arrive today. And they reek of like smoke or B.O. or something. Like my whole house, I was like, I got to get them out of my house and just burn them or something. You didn't want to, because your backyard is going to stay. You didn't want to try washing them? That's a great idea. Thank you. I honestly put my onion shirt in there with them.

They didn't. I held them up and they were too small. I'm going to re-donate them or something. Yeah, redonate them. I don't want that. They were so putridly. It sounds like they've been overly donated. Yeah.

Yeah. Here's my question. Are these jeans? They are jeans, yeah. Oh, okay. But these are very thin. Uh-huh. They're almost like jaggings.

Not quite. Like stretch jeans. Yeah, they're like stretchy jeans. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why do you ask? I just wasn't sure, you know, my eyesight's terrible. Right, right. I knew you had pants on.

Sizing up my whole outfit. I think you look great. I told you right away. It's like you're seeing each other for the first time. Like, really seeing each other. We're just really taking each other in. Yeah. I know.

I'm about to go back to North Carolina to visit my mama. Oh, Gingy. Mama. We are doing one of the episodes, I think, coming up where I will be with her. No. Will she be in the episode? She'll be in the room.

I don't have another, you know I have my headset. Can we do? When I'm on the road. And I'll have one. Can we get her one or something? I would love to. I don't know. I'll just have to hand it to her for a minute and have her say hi to y'all.

She's going to put the headset on? I think so. I'll have her put the headset on for a minute. Go to Hulu. Yeah. Until we can get her in person, that will have to be the best that we can do. I don't know what I told y'all I don't know what to expect

when I'm visiting her now because she's really throwing me curveballs Yeah Last time I went to go visit I posted this online But I got off the plane My brother happened to be in town We had lunch with her

And then all of a sudden she's like I want us all to go to the funeral home And we're like what And she goes we're going to go plan my funeral Oh my God Was that chipper that the most chipper oh man but that's amazing it ended up being amazing and everyone that's what everyone was saying like what a gift

yeah because you don't want to have to when you're you know when the she as she says hopefully it's 10 years from now right um that you know you don't want to have that um happening when you're sad so we went to the funeral home and I just started it was like well if I'm coming to the funeral home I am going to film content um so I didn't get Well, yeah, you got to keep your numbers up. I got that star meter up. And so we go in there and she just starts planning it. At first I started crying only because, you know, if she didn't have incurable cancer,

it would be more of like, oh, one day. Yeah. But this hits a little too close to home with the timeline here. And so I was like crying at first. But then she started telling us her ideas and you can't not laugh. She wants a... Well, I remember her second wedding. Yeah, the circus theme.

Anything like that? Similar. She wants a cardboard cutout of herself. This is great. So a classic funeral. A classic funeral. She would like... Is she being funny?

No, no, no. She's being dead serious. Cardboard. Yeah. Okay, so she, like, not being funny, wants a cardboard cut out of herself. For people to take pictures with and stuff? Honestly, I don't know. know, but I guess you could.

That's a good question, man. I will ask her if she wants people to take pictures. Yeah. But she wants a full, a full cardboard cutout of herself to be somewhere in the, I like that. She doesn't want to anything at the grave

because she wants to be cremated. Everything's going to be at the church. She wants to sit at our United Methodist Church. She wants to pick all the songs. What songs do you think? What are we? She wants some hymns. You know, I don't, she hasn't picked those out yet, but she was very concerned about what the snacks would be.

Of course. After that she wants snacks. Could you get her cardboard cut out holding a tray of snacks? Yeah, we could do that. That would be good. She did, she did say no chick-fil-a nuggets just because she's. Well, she's fancy. She still, well, no, she still stands firm on, she doesn't love their past with gay.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I love that. I know. So she, even in death, she's standing firm on that. So she's like, toes down. Whatever, just no chick flasets. You're like, we weren't planning on it. She wants the family to have, because the ladies of the church provide either a meal or a snack for the family. And she's like, I think y'all should take the meal because that's more food.

Oh, my God. Okay. And then the best part was she wants to do a dry run, as she calls it, of this funeral. Can I go? Please. So that she can be there to see what people would say what it would look like. I mean, why don't more people do that? I know.

So at some point, there has to be an actual dry run. Are you going to do it? I guess we got to figure out. It's her wish. Who does she want to speak? I'm not sure yet. Probably us, right? Probably you guys, for sure.

So she's got to let us know what the songs will be and who's going to speak. Now, I don't know, like, if we invite people to this, like, will there be an audience? There's things to figure out for sure. But, yeah. Beyond what you already listed? Yeah. Now, I hope it's okay that I'm going to steal something. Please.

But at my funeral, I am also going to say no chick-fil-a nuggets. Yeah. Me too. Okay. Yeah. I do think we will probably implement the baby pools that she had at her wedding reception for the coolers of the soft drinks and cans of soda. Is it going to be in the same location? Yeah.

That's where the wedding was. Yeah, where she got married is where her funeral would be. Wow. And so the sodas, is it like, tax? and fresca. No, in the south it's like Coke and Diet Coke and Sprite and stuff like that. Those will be in the reception hall wherever the non-chicken nuggets will be and whatever snacks that we land on.

But she wants chicken nuggets there. She wants the family to have the hearty meal that the ladies at the church provide. Now, what we do snack-wise for the guest after the funeral will be up to us because the ladies will have already done their part. So yeah, so we started just laughing hysterically during this because it, you know, as always my mom's ridiculous. Yeah. But she's dead, as I said, dead serious about this. And so we even took pictures that week of her for the cardboard cutout.

And what does she wear for the? This is unreal. She had red pants on. And she wants. that exact out. Oh, yeah. Okay. Red pants on and a shirt with cherries.

Oh, maybe you could let her wear that. It was in the family. We just love a food cherry shirt. Yeah. And we also filmed her that day telling a bunch of stories in her outfit. Oh, right. You did the camera, multi-camera shoot. We did a shoot where she told us a lot of family history and anything that we would want

to know. Any family secret? Oh, that's such a great idea. Oh, I should have asked. I didn't ask them. I didn't ask. But I do think there's more to film her about. Definitely, yeah.

I don't think her story's done. If you think there are many more questions, let me know. But yeah, that was, I was not expecting that. But yeah, everyone that weighed in on it from the content collected was saying that that was such a cool thing for her to do for us. And it was. I mean, you know, I hate, it's hard to talk about those things. because the reality of it is so sad. But, you know, I do appreciate that we are having

Kennedy conversations about it too. Yeah. Having an open dialogue, so many families cannot talk about losing the person who is on their way out, even up till their death. Yeah. There's no conversation. And then you're just in the swamp after.

Yeah. It's so important to me to make sure that Max and Phil, Finn and Stephanie, everybody knows that I have checked everything off my list in life. I just want to be around longer to see Max and Finn grow up. Yeah. But there is not anything. That is a gift. What for myself?

To be comfortable with mortality. For your kids is so nice. Listen, I'm not totally comfortable with dying, but I'll tell you, I do want to, really, if I have a choice of how I want things to go, how I want to die, how the funeral or a memorial goes, and this is something I think about near daily now. Really? Really? Yeah. Yeah, because I just, I'm well aware. Anything can happen. Right. Do you have a plan for your funeral? No. And that's the thing is like, you got to have a few surprises. Like, it's nice for everyone to know going in and your family and stuff, but like, throw me unfortunate a little

surprise or something. Like put people on the spot. Are we invited? Think about us. Do you think you would go to my funeral? I would be there in a heartbeat. Because you're excited. No. Well, this is, as my mom says, many years down the road. Many years down the road. I just, I think it'd be fun to put people on the spot, like to be like. Oh, like a pass the mic. Oh, my mom doesn't want to pass the mic around anyone who wants to say stuff, come on up. But if it was like, wow, TIG in her Last Will and Testament said that we have to do a dance. That's the thing is I think part of the peace for other people, not just that you don't have to plan it, but also that you can see your loved ones' wishes.

Yeah, that's true. Just completely exactly the way they had hoped. And that would bring joy in the pain and sadness of loss. And whether it's serious or silly or however they want it, it would be such a wonderful, be like, that is exactly exactly what they want them. Handsome is supported by Squarespace. Squarespace gives you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. From consultations to events and experiences, showcase your offerings with a customizable website

designed to attract clients and grow your business. Squarespace also has a collection of cutting-edge design tools so anyone can build a gorgeous online presence that perfectly fits their brand or business. Squarespace's SEO tools help your ideal audience find you. Your website design is flexible with drag-and-drop editing and unrivaled visual design effects. no experience required. You can easily showcase video content with stunning libraries and even monetize your content with a paywall, perfect for online courses and workshops. Squarespace is so easy to use. Handsome even made our own website in less than 20 minutes. So what are you waiting for? Get started on your dream website today. Head to Squarespace.com slash handsome to save 50% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code Hansom. As we head into the fall, it is the perfect time to hit reset before the autumn rush.

And for me, that always starts with my wardrobe. Quince proves you don't need a crowded closet to look incredible. You just need the right pieces. I am awful choosy about my denim, but I was so impressed by Quince's straight-leg jeans. The best part was the quality, but the other best part was the price. Their jeans were priced at just $50. that's comparable to $245 a traditional retail. That's a 79% savings.

Plus, you get an amazing pair of jeans to go with all your cash. I find myself reaching for my quince jeans over and over again. Quince, I'm a fan. Find the fall pieces you'll reach for most at Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com slash handsome. Get free shipping on your order and $365. returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash handsome. Yeah, she said she wants it to be a celebration. Yeah, we'll just have to, yeah, celebrate.

For sure. Yeah. So I think it's awesome. It's very cool. And it's so, and you're so lucky that your mother is an evolved person able to have these conversations and be like, all right, everybody let's go to the funeral home yeah and let i mean that is that is one of the biggest gifts yeah you could ever hope to have for sure and you know it's like it's tough it's tough it's tough it's tough it's tough why don't always crowd run headcount it's it's tough it's when we're in person I know. Thank you, Mr. Thomas. But fortune, it's like, it's all, it's the hardest thing in the world.

The humor is real, but also underneath it is like the reality of the situation. Yeah. Yeah. I know it's like so, it's such a weird universe to be living in right now because I've been crying like a lot lately. Yeah. And just because, you know, there's been some real valleys for her. and not great news. And so I'm just like sad.

But then she throws these like things in there that made me laugh so much that, you know, it brings levity. Yeah. But I am glad to have the time to like, you know, have these conversations and to know what the runway is so that it's not like you had to experience just some like out of nowhere complete. like gobsmacked thing, you know, I am grateful that there is like time to, you know, to do the things and say the things. Yeah, and yeah, so many people, they're gone with no notice. Yeah. And there's so much to catch up on and planning.

And, yeah, my mother was like mid-60s. And like nobody saw that coming. And so there was no plan. And the fact that you get, she's bringing you in on the planning. And yeah, hopefully it's 10 years from now. Yeah. And that's not going to be easy either in 10 years. But the openness is I'm true, I find it so remarkable because I think so many people,

her age, not only don't talk about that, but even cancer. Yeah. It is unspoken. Yeah. And it's private. And then that's it. And so wherever she got this from is... Yeah, what is she reading amazing books?

Or she's just always been... I don't know. This evolved. I mean, she's pretty candid. Yeah. We've always, like, faced things pretty candidly. Are you surprised, though, that that's how she's dealing it? No, I guess not.

I mean, I'm surprised by her resilience. Yeah. I think that's probably surprised her, too. Like, she's just handled it so strongly. Uh-huh. Because, you know, there are times in her life that she's been, you know, I don't know what the right word is. Like rocked by life. Yeah.

Yeah. And had a hard time like letting go of the hard things that happened. She would hold on to things. But this she has just faced it very strongly, very openly. Openly. She's talked a lot, you know, online about it. And, you know, and what has. done is that I get all I mean I have never been so immersed in this world of cancer

It's not a world I would choose to be in as You know firsthand But I've just been so surprised that all the people sharing their stories with me now Talking about it and being kind of grateful and that someone's having a conversation about it. Yeah, people are so desperate to be seen like with their own illness or their family members when there's that darkness secretive. And how it modeled like how to do it, how to do it well, you know. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. I would say you guys are doing it spectacularly because there's no getting around it being sad and knowing somebody's struggling and you love her and, but that it's also like, man, she's kicking such serious ass, even down to like her cardboard cutout. Which that will be fun. I have to get that made for the dry run for sure. You got to. You have to.

She needs to see it. You can just live on Amazon or her. True, true. Yeah. She's just live in her apartment. It's just like it also makes me wish I was like a psychologist because I would love to talk to her and get into her mind and be like, tell me about the chicken nuggets and the cutout. Well, maybe we can get her on the pod one of these days.

Oh my gosh, yes, please. That would be amazing. We could devote an episode to her. I would love that. Yeah, I would be really on that. We'll figure it out. Yeah. Well, should we get to now that we talk about this?

Let's get our question for today. Yeah. Today's question, Oscar, is a Canadian musician and producer who variety is called a feminist and queer icon. She is currently on tour and you can get tickets on her website. Peaches is asking today's question. Truly an icon.

I have listened to my friends just scream sing Peaches songs and it's so fun to want. Yeah, and her live shows are incredible. You gotta go. Hello, handsome. It's Peaches and Miss Faggie. Listen to that purr.

Oh, she's so cute. And my question for you today is, are you a cat person? Are you a dog person? Are you a snake person? I don't know, a bird person. My question is, what kind of pet is your pet of choice? Did you hear the purrs? Yes.

I didn't. There was a low rumbling purr there. Yeah, low, rubble, pearl. Can you imagine if we revealed that one of us is a, snake person and we didn't know this whole time. That is a very specific personality to be a snake person. Well like iguana people like that's always heroin dealers in in the park they have a wait wait wait there are some iguana people that aren't heroin people. I'm just the guys in the park growing up who had an iguana on their on their shoulders usually they were heroin

people usually a heroin dealer yeah yeah but also that is a subculture. Sure. Yeah, bird people are specific too. I was just reading a kid's book about like friendship. Not for me. Just to figure out of connection. I think you're back. Welcome back, my friend.

Part of it was like these two kids and one of them was like, I love cats. And the other's like, I love dogs. And then the moral was they were like, wait, I also like dogs. And I also like cats. They were like, we can like them both. Like I don't know when you're born they go you've got to be a cat person or a dog person I love them both it's like being non-binary exactly yes you can be both you want it or you can be nothing at all exactly yeah we all be whoever you want I would have always said I was a dog person

and then parv got these two kittens that I mean they're a year old now or something but they are you can you can kind of manhandle them you can you can get right in there and they're purring and they were strays their manhandle look like But I mean like just like grab them and rub your face in them and they're they never scratched that face in that piss They're killers though they do sorry if you miss that fortune search fortune Marie rub that face in that pose no I just like this I just like to make eye contact with TIG is that Because your mouth freezes I think there's a dog in my future but I'm a dog a dog and cat person now I'm loving these particular cats.

I don't like knowing I could get mauled. Like your cat, remember? I do remember. But those scars have kind of disappeared. Kind of. Kind of. It was like you said, oh, my cat scratched me and then revealed it was like you had a tiger deep mall you.

Your belly? It was. You know, I think I told you he had gone through some trauma where his head got caught in a plastic bag handle. and he tried to get away from it and then the plastic was flapping behind him and he was just running up the stairs, down the stairs just trying to get it was so sad and ever since then

he was just a little on edge and I picked him up walked past the kitchen counter and pushed the stool in and it went and he used my stomach as his launching pad claws out I mean yeah

But it's like, he didn't know that poor little thing. But what I find fascinating is when people are not any animal. Oh, that's, I mean, they need to go to jail. That's like that's such a. People just do not like any animals? Is that not a red flag? It's interesting. Definitely the different thing.

I don't know what that is. Like I get being nervous about them. Maybe you've had an experience, but like, they are gifts from the Lord. They are. They really are. Yes. Yes. They have, I truly, I don't know if I've mentioned this, but I sometimes feel like I'm deeply

on drugs when I see animals inside the house. Yeah. I'm like, we have animals. Stephanie, we have animals living inside of our house. These little furry creatures are living in our house. They're part of your family. They're taking a shit in a tray there. Yeah.

It makes us laugh so hard. After I explained that to her, she started having those moments on her own. She's like, I had that drug-trippy moment when Skip came walking in the room. It's like, there's a little animal that just presented itself. Yeah. I'll be honest. I am a cat person.

We didn't know that about you. I do love a dog. You do? Like you like to get in there with a dog. Yeah, the dog has to not smell like a dirty dog. Yeah, okay. I do agree. Yeah.

The dirty dog's tough one and it gets into the furniture. Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's a little bit of a, you don't have a problem with that. I, because I remember your Harrison Ford like, come here. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So it seems like you're fine with the smelly dogs and-

Well, like cat houses smell like they have cats in them. The litter, that bothers me more, I think. Interesting. Yeah, I don't mind. Yeah, I guess sometimes like a big golden retriever is real stinky. I don't love that. What do you prefer, a smelly dog or a house that smells like cat litter? I think I would, I've never had a cat, so I don't know what that's like.

But I would think that with the cat litter, would it just one room smell? Well, this wasn't a real question, but I love it. that you're taking it to a serious level. I mean, you ask, I want to answer. That's our podcast. You ask me to answer. Are you full dog? Yeah.

I mean, I love, I mean, I can't really talk about it. I'll cry again. Wait, I, this just reminded me that someone DM me and said that they said, you got to do this quiz on handsome that finds out what vegetable you are. because we, I guess, did a mini episode where we had to say what vegetable we are, and apparently it's so accurate. How did we go to vegetables? I don't know. I was just thinking of what you ask, we answer. We will definitely do that.

Should I find it? Yeah. Oh, right now? Or maybe put it on the list. Maybe after we answer the question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yeah. I mean, I'm a biggie person, obviously.

Yeah. Because I could see you really getting into a little. little kitten. Maybe. Maybe. I'm really into little dogs. I love little dogs.

Yeah. I don't get to see Biggie. And that makes me sad. So I'm not going to go into that. But yeah, I was totally obsessed with him. In a way I never experienced with any dog.

Yeah. Animals teach you how to love. Like to be, you're picking up its shit. You're tending. to it and you're like I love this creature I know there was something like waking up to him was like

the greatest feeling in the world and you hadn't had a dog before him I had a dog growing up and the dog that dog died when I was 12 and I was so devastated by it that I was like I'll never have another dog not in a way that I didn't love dogs

but I was just like I can't handle this pain What kind of dog was that? It was a little Sheltie it's called it's like a minute a miniature collie. And I love that dog too. But, you know, Biggie just, I had for nine years. He just doesn't live near me anymore.

So I don't get to be with him. But yeah, I just couldn't believe how much I loved this dog. So he opened my world back up to dogs. And so now every time I see dogs, I'm always like, oh, my God, your dog. I'm really into wiener dogs right now. Me too. Like the furry ones, the long-haired one. I'm so into.

Too much. If I see, I take pictures of people. And how about the blonde ones? Yeah, the blonde hair. They're so great. Yeah. I'm just everywhere I go and I'm pet. I just saw a handsome listener in had their wiener dog and I was like, oh my God, can I pet your dog?

And yeah. So I'm very into other. I think that's helping me feel connected to biggie still. Yeah. Touching other people's dogs. And now do you think we should potentially get a handsome wiener dog? Maybe. Joint cuss?

Yeah, joint cussing. Don't tend me because I would. The only thing stopping me is traveling. I know the travel. I know, but then that's where we can hand it on. Yeah. With and then, you know. Oh, my God.

I mean, I really want one. I love long-haired weaner dogs so much. I love long-haired weiner dogs. Get out of my way. It's the only, it's the only wiener I want to. question I also I love you're I can't high-five May on this so you're gonna why can't you because mate does I'm loving May's we may loves weaners too and whatever I really love like a mutt I I follow all those accounts of like part pit bull kind of

mutts yeah I like like a like a mutt that the world forgot about that's like older it's in the shop. Maybe I would get an old dog. Oh, like maybe a little hello in there. Yes. Did you like that song? Yes. Oh, my God.

Yes. I want to play it for Power Flitter. You know, our friend of the pot, Alison Dunbar rescues senior dogs, and it takes a special person to be able to do that. She just rescued one. I know. I don't know how she does it.

I think it would kill me. But she, because she lost a senior dog not too long ago. Yeah, that just really devastated. or I would be a wreck. But I'm always like, thank God for those people who can do it because it just, it does take a special spirit to be able to give that dog such a great life at the end. I mean, I would hope that I would do that if I had the time and the, you know, schedule. I know, my travel schedule really does prevent me from getting another dog right now.

is what. Well, that's why the community weiner dog situation is, uh, I think really, I think it'll work for us. Yeah, I don't know if I'll ever have a cat, but I could see a world in which I can't really picture you with a cat, I can't really, because

big it was a little bit bigger than a cat. Yeah. And very, if you want snuggily. But he was so chill. I know. There are chill. Snuggling cats. I have pictures. I have pictures of them on my wall. It's just the, the cats, like, unpredictable,

intermittent, irregular sprints at night where it's like 1 a.m. and you're like, dig-d-d-d-d-d-k-da-k. Oh, I don't think I would like how cats. Don't they, like, paw your head at night? Like, they come and smack you in the head. They don't? Not my cats.

Oh, maybe you have to just have a certain, like a train, you train cats? I don't. I don't know. No. No, they just kind of get what you get is, My understanding is like They're called tuxedo cats

They're pretty Black and white cats Yeah They're pretty chill Yeah Orange cats are chill too Well I think orange cats can be a little bit Oh really

I do like the furry cats What are those called? Like the real like real furry No there's cats That have like kind of more matted Fur I like the real soft furry Yeah you like a long string hair A long hair

Camelaine? Maybe Yeah. My friend Andrea had a, what was it, her cat? Is that it? Yeah, maybe. Yeah, that's pretty cute. Okay.

I like it. Clearly it was big, yeah, like a big furry. Yeah. Lots of hair. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Wait, do we need to find out what vegetable we are? Can we?

Yes. Yes. Okay. That quiz I found is really long. Oh, no. It's like too long. We're looking to our two-hour episode. How much vegetable are you?

Thomas says we have to say the vegetable quiz. I just did it myself and it took about five minutes. Oh, man. And what vegetable? I am an onion. You're an onion. No way. Well, look who's inheriting the shirt.

We don't know if this is a shalette or a caper or a fig or an onion. Those are for sure. This might be an onion. We'll never. That's a peach. I'm seeing cherry tomatoes. Why are there? Why is a peach with a shalant?

Peaches. Peaches. Peaches. Look at that. Was that this episode that we flagged your shirt? Yes. Wow. That was a long time ago.

Can we hear what Peaches answered? I'm going to guess a cat, but I don't want to. Snake. Love cats and dogs. I wish I could take this cat on tour, but that wouldn't work. I wish I could take this cat for a walk, but I can't. I wish I could talk any hand my mouth from the cat, but I can't. And I'll take it.

I'm a cat person. Oh, that cat is cute. So what is your pet of choice? I do hear the pet. That is an outrageous creature. Peaches? No, the cat. That would a face that cat has.

And you heard the purring that time? I did. That's a Persian. I have heard. I have seen people take cats out of, on leashes. Is that common? Not very common or else you'd see it all the time. It wouldn't be saying is that common. But why are they doing that? My friend. But why are they doing that? Why is it happening? My friend just, well, I also near the end of their lives sometimes they'd do it, but also just

or just to let them experience. But also in the beginning of their lives, people put them immediately on a leash and just train him to go on a walk. I tried desperately with fluff. You did? Yeah, and she was like, like, jumping in the air, and I was like, oh, okay. She didn't like it? She did not like that.

Wait, did cats still do the thing where they, like, go out. Do they still do it? What, like, is it? For the 80s? Yeah, exactly. Is it still a thing where cats go out and, like, kill mice and stuff and then come inside, or do they all stay inside now because of coyotes and stuff?

I was trying to do stand up for a while, but like did cats figure out how to get down from trees? Because for a while you were calling the fire department all the time. Yeah. But that's less of a thing. That's less of a thing. I came back and now I've left again. You should have stopped it, Mickey.

Yeah. I actually, the fire department got a cat down from a tree on my street. No way. Yeah. And they had to get the big, huge ladder because the cat was like 50 feet up in the tree. They're so funny. It's so funny about that because you know they could get all the way up and then the cat's like, meh-and goes to, that could get down the whole time. Just jumps, though.

The cats into firefighters. Yeah, yeah. I'm so scared up here. In a night ago. Like you. That is, that is one of my, it's not a joke. One of your kings. Yes.

Yeah, so I like an exhausted housewife or a firefighter. A firefighter with a mustache. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. All right. That's right.

Well, wow. You guys. Wow. Wow. Wow. I can't remember what comedian. Which comedian's joke. It might be Mark Cohen.

Did you know him? Years ago, Sarah Silverman told me this joke of his. I think it was Mark. If it's not Mark, apologies, because I know everyone's listening to this podcast. Mark's listening. But it was when he would take his cat to the vet, and the vet would stick his finger in the cat's derrier. The cat would go, wow.

That's funny. Wow. That's really good. That's so good. Oh, good time. I'm sure I destroyed that. Yes. What do you have coming up?

What you have coming up. What you have. What you have? What you have? Come up. Oh. You go, girl. Okay, I'm on tour.

This is the last of my taking care biscuits tour. It's a cute. It's a cute name. October 2nd, Madison, Wisconsin, then Durham, North Carolina, Morganton, North Carolina, Jacksonville, Florida, Fort Lauderdale, Florida,

Oakland, Bakersfield, Santa Barbara, San Luis Obispo, and Los Angeles, California. Palm Springs, God, a lot of California dates, Denver, and then Nashville, Tennessee. Love it. And then that's the end of that tour.

Well, you can find me at Largo or Dynasty Typewriter doing my circus of a show where you never know. Is it stand up? Will it be a talk show? Will it be? Get me in there, coach. If it's a game show or something, can I come compete? Yeah, please. We don't know.

Maybe it's hot yoga. Yeah. Okay. Oh, get me in for that. I will be in Cincinnati, Ohio, Charleston, West Virginia, Chattanooga, Knoxville, Chico, California, Olympia, Washington, Fresno, Napa, Wilmington, Delaware, Terrytown, New London, Connecticut. And of course my rescheduled Colorado dates that I apologize that I had to do, it was necessary. Colorado Springs, Steamboat Springs, and Basalt, and the show and the tour goes on forever. Forever and ever. Mine doesn't. It ends in Nashville in November.

Well, make sure you subscribe, rate, and review our audio podcast. Also on YouTube. and we're available a day early on Hulu. Send your favorite app to your pals. Spread the word. Yeah, it's a good community. Yeah. It's a really handsome one. Send us your food shirts.

Send us pictures of you. Are you talking about this? Until next time. Keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feems, Tignitaro and May Martin. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Wulet. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com

and follow us on social media at handsome pod. What a podcast. What a podcast. That was a hate gum podcast. Checking allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking that I account for my house guests before I go grocery shopping. Oh dear. We went through those snacks really fast, and now I'm heading out for another round of food just a day after my big shopping run.

Yeah, checking first is handsome. So check Allstate First for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings varies subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.