Handsome - Pretty Little Episode #29

Episode Date: March 7, 2025

Mae and Fortune talk about trusting your instincts, made up holiday, and more on a brand new Pretty Little Episode!Handsome is streaming LIVE from Austin April 12! Get your tickets here.Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterSubmit questions to speakpipe.com/handsomepodFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTubeThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. This is a HeadGum Podcast. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first. Like you know how to check that your bird feeders are stocked up with seeds before heading out of town. You don't want those little guys going hungry. Checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds.

You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Handsome pot. Chatting with friends on the handsome pot. Chatting with friends on the handsome pot. Pretty little episode. Welcome to the Handsome Pod. Pretty little episode.

Welcome to the Handsome Pod. Pretty little episode. Welcome. And for me too. I'll say it too. I'm Fortune. I'm Mae. And we're together again.

How do you feel when you hear yourself singing such a tune? Oh, the theme tune. Yeah. It's like, it doesn't even feel like me because it's got your voice mixed in and tigs and it's like so many layers that I just think, wow, what a cool group. What a cool, handsome group. Yeah. You're in music mode right now, right? Dude, thank you so much for asking mentioning.

I yeah, I am. It's really, it's really crazy. Yeah. The two songs have come out and then the album comes out soon. And I'm like, I don't know. I went to they said the Gibson guitars said they would give me loan me a guitar for the tour. And I went down there and you go to like the showroom and they show you and I know nothing about guitars and my questions were like I don't know because they're like oh we got the 335 which of course is a hollow body with a pick up in the neck and I'm like I like the bigger one that's more

yellow I don't know which one's cute yeah what makes me look like a big boy yeah when did you start learning to play guitar? When I was 11, my parents got me lessons from a guy called Luis Mario Ahoya. And he was quite the character. And he used to tell me to close my eyes and imagine that I'm running and I'm being chased by a dog. And then he'd say, imagine you get to a hole in the road. Like, do you do you go around it or do you jump over it? And I'd be like, jump over it.

And he'd be like, wrong. Like, whatever I said was wrong. But then anyway, it was all about, like, trusting your instincts. Do you play any instruments? And that applies to guitar? Apparently. I don't know why the dog was involved. I started with the coolest instrument, the trumpet.

That is an alpha instrument. I played it, and I remember my dad was like, do you really have to do the trumpet because you have to buy one and it's expensive. Yeah. We didn't have a lot of money. And he's like, really? Does it have to be that? You want to play the trumpet? And I's like, really? You like, It doesn't have to be that.

I wanna play the trumpet. And I'm like, yeah, it's gonna be cool. And I lasted two years. Really? I never touched it again. Okay, well we gotta bust it out. I don't think I, I don't even think I could remember. I could maybe play Mary had a little lamb.

I was not good. I was like last chair. I always thought that the trumpet players were the coolest. Like, you know how people have like associations of colors with numbers? Do you have that where you're like seven, to me seven is yellow for sure. I don't have that now.

Oh, okay, okay. Well, to me trumpet- It's called a specific thing though, right? Synesthesia, is that it? Something like that. I don't like that. Because I know a fiddle player who can play, if he hears a song once, he can recreate it

because he sees it as colors. Really? That's incredible X-Men style skill. But I always thought of trumpet, like the brass section to me is like the color red, it's like Gryffindor, it's the letter A, it's like a strong leader instrument. And I also do play a little bit of guitar.

I can play like the four main chords. Yeah, nice. But my fingers start to hurt. I'm a delicate flower, Mae. You really are and you have sweet, supple skin and when you play the guitar you do build up like calluses on your fingers. So your tour is gonna be starting? Yeah it starts in LA on the 26th. I wish you should come play the trumpet and sing. I would love it. Do you feel like a rock star when you're

up there singing in a different way than when you're doing standup? I feel like it's acting. Because with standup, you can bail halfway through a joke, you can be like, well, that's not working, but you have to commit to a song from start to finish, and you kind of have to emote. And the way I'm wrapping my head around it is like I have to just act.

Act serious. Are you going to be inviting people? How do I put this? If you were Tig, how would you put it? Who would be invited to a key party? Are you inviting those people to the tour shows? I got to see how the first one goes because if I look like a little twerp up there and my voice is shaking and it's bad, then I am inviting nobody. But if I feel like I'm, you know,

why can't I think of a single, John Mongeauvy? Is that really fair? Yeah, then I'll for sure invite, I'll go through the Rolodex. All right, I feel like there's gonna be some people coming to these shows that are gonna be throwing their ponties. I'd love that.

I have some special guests that are pretty exciting as well. Ooh, yeah. Maybe people will buy our handsome ponties. Yes. And throw those at you. That didn't occur to me. Yeah, we have ponties. That me. Yeah. That would be amazing. Will you come? Are you in town then? I might be. If I'm in town, I will come. Where did it come

from that like the way to get out of invites was to say I'm washing my hair that day? That's an old one. Yeah, right. And I don't know that it would hold up in court these days. I think so too. You just got a fresh cut. It's not going to hold up in your court because your hair is shorter. I know and it's looking very orangey. You know the endless battle of... Trying to get this hair sun kissed is a journey.

Right? And the roots come in. I found someone who does a good color job. And are you going for, do you put like an ashy toner over top? Um, I not ash, but there's like a, like, um, I do like highlights and low lights. Oh, I love that. It's got like a, the top parts blonder and the base is brown. That's what I want.

But how long does it take when you go in there? I mean, it's like three hours. See that you could, that would hold up in court. You go, I can't come. I've got to get my hair sun kissed. Yeah, my highlights and lowlights. Well, you look great, bud. Should we get to some questions?

Yeah, let's do it. It's always exciting hearing these. Hello, let's do it. It's always exciting. Hearing these. Hello, handsome pod. This is Sarah calling from Fayetteville, Georgia. Over here with my dog Gus. Love the pod. Love y'all so much. Here is my question. If you could create a brand new holiday, what would you celebrate? How would you celebrate it? And what time of year would you celebrate it? Look forward to your answer. Thanks, y'all. The listener questions are really good. They're really good. Also, I love hearing another Southern accent saying,

my question. My question is, here's my question y'all. Yeah. What do I like? Yeah. What do you like? What do you want to celebrate? I think of that all the time when people ask those questions. I'm always like, what am I into? What do I like?

Who am I? What's my personality? Yeah. The first thing that came to mind was that the new Mission Impossible is coming out in May and I was like, that should be a national holiday. Oh, just for that movie? Well, it's so much fun to do. You can rewatch all the Mission Impossibles and then go.

But I don't know. I think maybe it should be lunar, like for those super moons and stuff. You know, a couple of times a year you get like- So not necessarily every year? No, like- Or multiple times a year. Multiple times a year, yeah.... So not necessarily every year? No, like... Or multiple times a year? Multiple times a year, yeah. I was like, when does the lunar stitch happen?

Well, isn't it like every year there's a handful of times where people are like, whoa, it's the wolf blood moon, you know? Wolf blood, I know. I never know when those are going to be. Like that would be nice if we all got that night off or day off and we all got together and howled. Or what about you? I have a fun one and a serious one.

Oh great. The fun one, I think there should be a celebration that celebrates comedy. Yeah. And that whole day is dedicated to like either watching a funny movie, seeing a funny show, Either watching a funny movie, seeing a funny show, your friends could put on funny sketches yourself, film a funny TikTok. But your only goal that day is to have fun and laugh. I'm all for that.

I think people don't take April Fool's Day seriously enough. I think that could be a similar vibe, like pranks, rubber know, rubber chickens. I also want this holiday to involve treats. Yeah. Kind of like a treat yourself type situation. You've heard on the Parkinson's wreck, it was like treat yourself. Oh, I haven't heard that.

And it's like a holiday where you just do what you want. Yeah. So it's like my friend Steve used to do this thing where he would have a treat yourself day where a group of like eight people would all put in suggestions of things they think would be fun to do. Yeah. And he would curate a day where you just go from,

he would rent like a party bus. What? And go from thing to thing. And not everything had to be big. It could start with a coffee and then go, then it was silly, let's go try mattresses. This guy. And then it was like, let's go do a workout,

some kind of fun workout class, and then let's go to some kind of arcade. Arcade. Yeah, then let's go to, you know, some kind of like arcade. Arcade. Yeah. How did I know you were going to say arcade? Let's go to like a lunch. Okay.

This guy is really my type of guy. This sounds like my dream day. I love an activity. I like to know what I'm doing. It's scheduled. I'm with my pals. Wow. We don't have a comedy day.

I could see a treat yourself day. Yeah. Or they could be combined. And I participated in several of these. I will say, I think you need to do like treat yourself day. Or they could be combined. And I participated in several of these. I will say, I think you need to do like a half day. A whole day is a lot. Like now we've over treated ourselves. I highly recommend that.

The serious one was it should be a holiday to go vote. Oh, 100%. It's insane that it's not. That is crazy when you think about it. If they don't want to give us a whole day, it should be at least half a day holiday. Yeah, that is so wild. I know individual businesses will sometimes say our employees can go vote if they want, but yeah, that's completely insane.

There's too many people that don't vote that we gotta do something about it. But yeah, those are mine. It should be maybe also that all 18 year olds, like the first year that they're allowed to vote, they all get a hundred bucks when they go to the, we gotta fight back. Didn't Elon Musk pay people like $1,000

to vote in the swing states? Like, there's a lot of sketchy shit going on. I say we need to get sketchy as well and start giving all the teenagers money if they vote. Thanks, Sarah. That was a great question. I hope to meet Gus one day. What's next? This is Anna calling in from Portland, Oregon, and I have a question for you about meeting your idols. In April, I'm flying to New York City to see a one-man play performed by a truly talented actor I deeply admire. And there's a decent chance I'll have an opportunity to meet them briefly at the stage door after the performance. My question is, what do I say? I want to be brief, direct, and genuine, and to express how their work has moved me. But I want the interaction to be positive for both of us and prevent it from careening off into doe-eyed fangirling.

Bonus points for stories about your best fan interactions, and maybe one or two of the worst. I wonder who she's going to meet or hoping to meet. I know she's very coy about it. I wanted to Google it. I don't know who's doing a one-man show right now. But that's a very good question because. It honestly depends on the person,

especially if you're doing like a stage door situation. If you're doing a stage door situation, I could see a world in which if there's a lot of people there waiting, you're probably not going to get much time. Other than a, hey, I love you. What if it's like an obscure random person that's like so stoked that someone's at the stage door? Yeah. Then you might have some time something that's nice is when. I'm you shouldn't pressure yourself to not have the dough i'd fangirl fandom feeling cuz you're a fan of this person and they're gonna be used to that and but what's nice is if you say something thoughtful specifically about their work, like some reference that's maybe a little more obscure that shows

that you really like care, I don't know. Yeah, I'm just, I'm always appreciative when people are just real. Yeah. On themselves and they're like, hey, you know, I really love what you do or I've been watching you since such and such, like I'm always appreciative of that. I definitely know what you do or I've been watching you since such and such. Like I'm always appreciative of that.

I definitely know what doesn't work and that's like nagging someone and you'd be shocked how many people come after shows to me and are like almost argumentative. But I think it's because they think it'll be memorable or like they'll say something like I liked your old they'll say something like, I liked your old stuff better or something like that. Like a quote unquote backhanded compliment. Yes. Maybe in their minds, it's like kind of flirty and fun, but it's like, you have to remember

you've never met this person and you don't know what kind of day they're having. And I had recently at a show, this woman come up to me and say, um, hi, it would be really good. Um, at some point tonight, if we could find 10, 15 minutes to sit down and talk, thanks. And then walked away. So I was like, oh, okay. And I'm like about to go on stage. Like she came up to the side of the stage. There's like tons going on.

Like my, I have friends there. And then, so I kind of forgot about it. Then, then like later on I'm talking to someone else and she's there kind of hovering and like rolling her eyes that I haven't, she keeps coming up going. So are we going to talk? And I was like, sorry, I don't, I don't really know what you mean. Like, is there something specific you want to talk about? And then it was basically like, I'm going to be in LA and I think we should be friends.

And there was like, but there was like a negative element to it to have like, well, I bet a lot of people are telling you that the show was great. Like, I'm not going to tell you that. Like it was very, I don't know. It was like, she maybe thought it would be kind of- She's already assuming way too much

and acting like you're old friends and you're not living up to your part of the friendship. Yeah, like she was mad at me. Right away she was mad at me. Definitely don't do that. Yeah, don't be mad at them. Yeah.

I mean, the truth of the matter is we all love to meet people and connect. The real of it is just that it's a crazy night and there's 2000 people to, you know, you want to connect with as many people as you can, but it does leave you limited in time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Probability of you sitting down for 10 to 15 minutes with someone is not. Yes. Gonna probably just be able to do that. Yeah, but-

Even if you was acting normal. Yeah, yeah. But 100%, you're right, Fortune, that just being real in yourself and saying, I'm definitely saying that the work has meant a lot. It's always awkward if you go in with, I have a crush on you, or you're my hall pass, or my friend is a fan of you, but I'm not, or things.

I don't ever get that. or you're my hall pass or like, my friend is a fan of you, but I'm not or things. I like, but saying your work has meant a lot. That's gonna every time. Yeah, I think that's why we do it, right? So it's, yeah, it does mean a lot. It means a lot for sure. Also, if you have more that you want to say to them, you could write them a card and say, I always read the cards that people give me.

Yeah. Um, so that is a nice way. Um, yeah, there are some, there are every, every now and then some people that are a little inebriated who will be like, you think you're funny? Yeah. I'm funny too. All my friends say I'm funny. Oh my God.

Or definitely people who, um, before shows are like, you better make me laugh. And you're like, okay, that's the idea. Or the worst thing, I mean, I get this a lot with people who are fans of other famous people that they think I have a connection to. So they come up to me and are like, could you get this to Lisa Kudrow, please? That's hilarious. They're like, yeah. When I used to be on Chelsea L lately, I would get that a lot. Really?

Especially when that show is at the height of its popularity. I would have people that I kind of knew, but not well, who would like ask me to coffee or something and then like have like a package for me to give to Chelsea to ask her for like a favor. And I'd be like, okay. Oh my God. That's so- People I hadn't heard from for like 20 years since like, you know, high school or college wanting her to do something. And I was like, hi, I haven't heard from you in 20 years. Yeah, that's gross. That like-

Yeah. Just being real, just be kind. If you appreciate it. Say it. It's just whatever's from the heart. Yeah, agreed. And I will say I went to see Bette Midler in Hello Dolly on Broadway. And afterwards, I did not wait at the stage door just because I was like, she's too important to me. Like I should have, I wanted to get her autograph or meet her, but I just was like, if this goes badly, I will never, I'll be so sad. So I didn't, but I think that you should. Yeah, I was so geeked to meet Dolly Parton and was like sweating, like waiting for my chance to say hi and I just gave her a quick hi and like, I love you so much.

And I didn't want to ask her for a picture because I was like, it's kind of was one of those things that said no pictures. Yeah. Like don't bug people. So I didn't want to be that person. And then I got home that night and like 30 people had posted pictures with her at that event. Infuriating, yeah.

But I love her so much. Yeah, I sometimes have regretted not asking for a photo as well, because sometimes I think, well, maybe I'll get to be friends with this celebrity, and so I don't wanna, and then you never do, so it's like, I should have got the photo. Yeah. Yeah.

I think a lot about Paul McCartney, and if I met him, because he's probably met more people than the Pope, like more people than anyone on earth. And everyone says shit to him. And I'm like, how could I impress upon him the importance? Yeah. Yeah. Actually, I'm doing meet and greets though at my music tour shows and I've never really

formally done those before. And I'm looking forward to that because it's like you have a decent amount of time with people and you can like... Yeah. That'd be great. I love it. Are you kidding? I'm going to overshare.

I'm going to be way too intimate. I do them at my shows too. They're nice, right? Yeah. Let's hear Anna's answer. What I think I want to say is the way you portray the human experience, love in particular, is just a gift. And it's so obvious you have so much love in you. Thank you for sharing that with all of us. But is that too much? P.S. It's Andrew Scott.

Oh, it's Andrew Scott. Oh. Okay, I've met Andrew Scott and I think you're gonna have a warm audience there. I think you should definitely say that. And I think that's, I actually, it crossed my mind when she said that about the human experience and love. I thought, I wonder if it's Andrew Scott. Yeah, definitely say that. Oh really?

He seems like a kind soul. Super kind and funny and warm, yeah. That's great. That's a really nice compliment too. Oh my God. That's just being like your soul is shining through and helping people. That's nice. Keep shining. Keep smiling knowing you can always count on me. Please just do that. Sing a little something. Well what a treat. A true treat. I just say it doesn't even matter if the person is known or not. Just having like kind interactions go, they go a long way.

Yeah. When like a stranger just like opens a door for you or to like say like, hey, I like your shoes or whatever. Yeah. When like a stranger just like opens a door for you or to like say like, hey, I like your shoes or whatever. Yeah. It means a lot. So I recommend just doing it on the reg. Yeah, you know what? Maybe I've said this, but what I've started doing is leaving like positive Yelp reviews.

Like if I have like a really good, I don't know, Thai massage or something, I'll like make a point of, with that person's name in it, just because I think it's nice. That's great. Yeah. Give those five stars, baby. Well, this was a real treat. Please keep submitting these amazing questions

and your answers as well at speakpipe.com slash handsome pod. Fortune, what do you got coming up in early March? I'm doing some shows at the Irvine Improv and at the club in Huntsville, Alabama. And then I'm starting my big next theater tour. It's all new material and it starts out in Savannah, Georgia. And then I go to Charleston, South Carolina, Albuquerque, Phoenix, Cleveland, Columbus, all those places.

Nice. March 1st, I'm in Toronto at the Danforth musical. March 4th, I'm in New York. And March 9th, I'm in London, England. And I'm playing my full album. I'm a TV and telling stories and doing meet and greets and there's like special guests and I'm nervous because the venues are too big.

So please come and- It's gonna be great. Tell your pals. Yes, tell your pals, make a night of it. Yeah. Throw some ponties. Throw some ponties for the love of God. Enjoy some tunes.

Well, awesome. Well, we appreciate everyone's question. It's always fun to hear from you guys. And we'll see you next week on our regular pod. Yes. But until then, keep it pretty handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, May Martin, Tignotaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced,

recorded and edited by Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsomepod. What a podcast! That was a hate gum podcast. That was a hate gum podcast. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First. Like you know to check that your guidebook isn't from 1997 before going on that trip abroad. Half of those restaurants aren't even open anymore.

Checking First is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.