Handsome - Pretty Little Episode #4

Episode Date: September 13, 2024

What better way to ring in the weekend than with another Pretty Little Episode from your handsome friends! Submit your questions at speakpipe.com/handsomepodHandsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media: @handsomepodMerch: handsomepod.comWatch on youtube: youtube.com/@handsomepodEmail the show: [e-mail] Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Handsome pot. Handsome pot. Handsome pot. Chiding the friends on the handsome pot. Chiding the friends on the handsome pot. Pretty little episode. There we are. I love a pretty little episode. There we are. I love a pretty little episode.

I love one too and our voices together in sync. God, it's good. Thanks to editing. Do you ever listen to that and think, May wrote that and we're singing along with May and kind of we're so talented. May, you're a real talent, right? That's a hit song.

That's a hit jingle. I told you my kids sing it to me. And I don't even know when they hear the song. May wrote this jingle and put it all together. And then Tig and I just had to do some like- We just had to sit there and look handsome. We had to look handsome. Tig brought in the bass, the handsome, pod.

And then I brought in a little harmony action. So do your kids listen to the pod or they just heard? No, I think they told me they've heard me sing it or Stephanie sing it. And you hear that kids are sponges and you can kind of roll your eyes at that and be like, yeah, right. No, they are.

Anything you say, anything. Well, the five-year-old who I live with, she knows your full name so well. Anytime I'm like, I'm gonna go record the pod, she's like, say hi to Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. Oh, wow. I know. Cause mine's a mouthful.

Yeah, and then I think it must've been playing in the car or something one time, cause the other day she was like, how are your tight pants? I was like, what day she was like, how are your tight pants? I was like, what? She was like, how are your tight pants? Tell Tig I know about the tight pants. Wow, that's so cute.

I guess we were talking about how my pants were tight. I don't even recall. And that's what's also funny is people will be like, they'll like mention some something from the show and I have no idea what they're talking about. Of course not. No, cause we're just babbling on and then sometimes we record, you know, a month in advance.

I have no idea when somebody's like, tight pants. Yeah, this part is stream of consciousness for sure. We don't know what we're saying. We don't know what's coming out of our mouth most of the time. But let's hear what is coming out of our listener's mouth. Yes, we do. Great segue.

Hi, I'm Heather in Silver Spring, Maryland. And my question for the handsoms is what is or was your favorite piece of clothing that you've ever had. Ooh. That's good. Heather. Heather.

How dare you, Heather. Heather. That's a really good one. I've had different pieces of clothing at different points in my life. Have you? Yeah. Really?

Tell us more. That I really hung on to for a long time until someone in my life told me it was time to part ways. Someone in your life had to be like, it's done. Now it's my wife. My wife. A childhood piece of clothing that I was very attached to were these turquoise and purple umbros.

Hello. Do you know what umbros are, May? Like running shoes? No, they were like soccer shorts and t-shirts. Very popular when I was a child. I still wear them around the house. I shuffle around. You still have umbros?

Oh, I still shuffle around in umbros. I shuffle around. You still have umbrose? Oh, I still shuffle around in umbrose. You know, I'm a retired soccer player. The logo's like a diamond. Like a diamond, yeah, flipped on its side. And when you wore those, you just felt like the cat's pajamas. Oh, I love them so much. I wore them all the time. I mean, probably till they disintegrated.

Oh, that's the, I mean, I'm at that phase with there's a t-shirt I have that was the perfect level of worn with holes in it and now it's too much and I have to retire it. And it's a vintage Paul McCartney tour t-shirt that I didn't even, a friend of mine actually had it from going to his tour in like the 90s, I think, early 90s, but it's like really ripped and,

oh, it's so soft, I wear it as pajamas, but it's a goner now. I hate to piggyback on yours, May, but I have a rock jersey from when I was a teenager from the actual concert. It is the coolest, softest, greatest, it's probably, I probably have it since I was 17. Oh, wait, from what concert?

I don't wanna say on the show because there's a second half to this. I had this, I've had this since I was 17, okay? And I met the singer in person. I have the t-shirt on and somebody was like, oh my God, you should sign Tig's shirt. And I was like, yeah, sure. And she signed to Tig from this person

so big across the back that it ruined it for me. Wait, are you serious? Yes, I didn't want my name on my back. That's hilarious. You don't understand that? I do, I think I do. I do, but it's on the back. Yeah, I didn't want that.

I would have just taken the autograph and also did it have to be that big? Yeah, that's a bold choice. I feel like whenever anybody asks me to sign, I'm always like, are you sure? I asked that too, I'm like, really? I have not the best handwriting. Or on their clothing,

and I try and make it not intrusive and off to the side. You know what I mean? I was so, while I was watching this autograph happen, I was like, no! No! Your favorite shirt. That was my favorite. I never wear it anymore.

I'm too embarrassed to walk around with two tig. Love one of the biggest stars in the world. That's hilarious. Iconic rock star. Yeah. Done. Ruin the tea. Ruined it with her own signature.

So that would have been your fave, would you say? Yes. It pains me. It's, it's still, you know, I still love it. It's still hard for you to get over. I can see it in your face. It's a bummer. Should we hear Heather's answer? Yeah. My favorite piece of clothing that I have ever worn was a pair of orange jeans that I found at a thrift store when I was in college, the College of William and Mary. And I loved those jeans. They were so comfortable. They were soft. And I had a song that I sang about them.

Oh, let's hear it. Orange jeans, orange jeans, orange jeans, orange jeans. Obviously greatly influenced by my missionary upbringing. Yes, that's it, Mae. So yeah, those are my favorite, my orange jeans. It's no chat with friends on the handsome pod, but it is lovely. Orange jeans, orange jeans.

That was a very fortune song, I think. Orange jeans. Where you just get to it. Yeah. You know what it is. Get right to it. Love it, thanks Heather. What do you pair with orange jeans?

Orange shirt, orange shirt. Or a white one, I feel like, or black, you know? That's where it's gray. You can work at Hooters. Oh, that's true. What about pink? What's your feeling about wearing pink with orange? Oh, with orange? Orange is a tougher one, but I love pink.

I say orange, you say orange. Orange, I say orange? Yeah, orange. What do you say, Mae? Orange, orange. I say orange? Yeah. Orange. Orange, orange. I say orangy. Orangy. That's how you say it in Canada, orangy. Well.

That was, you know I'm joking, right? No. Of course. Okay, okay, you do, it just wasn't funny. But how do you say it? I say orange. Unfortunately, don't you laugh at me. Oh, you guys just didn't think it was funny. Got it. I say orange, orange.

Yeah, me too. Two against one. So I'm gonna go out now. Fine. All right, on to the next question. Hi, handsome. This is Ashley from Atlanta. Just wanted to ask you,

what small thing did your partner do before you guys were official official that you knew that you loved them and that they loved you? What was the small thing that they did? Oh, that's so sweet. I feel like I can't say for sure this was when Stephanie knew she loved me, but I remember we had gone bowling and she was holding the bowling ball and she was about to roll it.

And when she looked over and laughed, I'm sure, who knows what I was saying, but there was something in that moment when she was laughing where I was looking at her thinking, wow, this is the perfect human being. And I even filmed her, and this was before, I think phones were as where everyone's filming everything, but I just happened to record her.

And that moment, I wanna go back and look at it because, oh man, it was just a look and a laugh where it was like, okay. I got it bad. Yeah, I got it real bad. I got a bad for this person. Yes, I do. What about you, Fortune?

I have the worst memory. I'm like trying to think back to like, if there was. Anything you ever did. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Saving money isn't always easy, but with your home insurance policy, it is. Allstate makes it fast and simple to get a quote

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for new home insurance customers surveyed in 2023 who switched to all state and reported savings. Savings vary. Jax's shows love with acts of service. So she was always like doing nice things. And she was teaching at the time we were long distance. So she would leave teaching, you time, we were long distance. So she would leave teaching after a long week and fly to meet me in whatever city I was touring in. And just that act of like, I'm exhausted, but I wanna see you went a long way.

And then we would leave each other notes when we were about to leave and not see each other for a few weeks with the hotel paper, whatever the, you know, they have the little notes. We would write each other a note and leave it, hide it in each other's bag or purse or whatever so that we would find it later. Like a fanny pack or something. or purse or whatever so that we would find it later. But I just- Like a fanny pack or something. Yeah, I left it in my purse and her fanny pack. But I just knew from the way, the effort she was making

that this was more than a little fling. I pulled up the video that I was talking about. Just now? oh my God. And can I tell you what just blew my mind? What? It was June 26th, 2013. Max and Finn were born June 26th. No way.

Whoa. Yeah. That's crazy that that stood, that they stood out in your mind. Yeah. Yeah, that's trippy. Whoa. Yeah. That's crazy that they stood out in your mind. Yeah. That's trippy. That's wild. My mind's kind of blown.

That's crazy. Yeah. Oh, someone's about to have a romantic talk later today. Yeah. Stephanie, sit down. I need to talk to you about something. I need to tell you something romantic. Something is afoot.

Max and Finn were born three years to the day after this. Wow, that is crazy. That is trippy. It's really wild. I can't wait to share that with her. What else do you guys want from this podcast? I mean, Jesus, we were just dropping gems less than we make.

It's pretty wild. Should we hear what Ashley has to say? We should. My small thing is we were dating for a few months and my husband saved his croutons from the salad at a restaurant for me because he knew croutons were my favorite. All right, thank you so much.

What a guy. That's sweet. What a guy. Those little sweet. What a guy. Oh, I love that. Those little things do add up and mean a lot, so. They do. None of us can forget to do the smaller things. Yeah. I know I didn't answer that question perfectly,

but I still couldn't help but remember that night bowling with Stephanie. Yeah, that's where your mind went. And there was a reason. That's right. June 26th. What else you got listeners? This question's from Jess.

Jess. Hi, Handsome's. I love the show. I was just wondering if you could swap lives for one day with any of your co-stars, who would it be and why? Co-stars like in TV and film? I'm gonna, I think she means. I don't know if it's she or they. I think Jess means the pod co-host, but we should.

Okay, because I would, I think we would all switch with May. No, I mean, yeah. Yeah, of course. I don't know, unfortunately might not wanna. No, there's no way. As boring as we are, we of course wanna switch with you. I don't know, but everyone has a child in their life.

Does that mean I have to babysit? Also, I'm not, listen. Max and Finn are so self-sufficient. I'm kidding. But they can make their own food. They dress themselves. Can they make me a corn, a turkey? No, what is it?

A folk soy corn dog. Is that what it is? No, they're gonna make you a corn turkey. Aren't there vegan corn dogs? There's vegan everything. Okay, I'd like a vegan corn dog. I feel like I might wanna switch with Thomas, just because I wanna know if I should go all the way

and transition and be a boy. And so I just kinda- Oh, you wanna really know, yeah. I just wanna have a- Are you considering it? No, I don't know. No, I wonder where I'll end up. I think I would never have like bottom surgery, but I don't know. I don't know that I'm at my- I don't think I've achieved my ultimate state. But I don't know. But it would be fun to be Thomas, have that mustache. Everyone evolves as we get older and get more comfortable in our skin and figure out who we are. Yeah, exactly.

And do you ever kind of go higher or lower in your dose or whatever? No, I do it pretty regularly, like every day, this micro-dosing, and it's like a very incremental process. But yeah, I do think maybe one day I would up it, but I don't know, I'm good where I am right now, but come on, who wouldn't wanna- And if you upped it, how long would we be until we would be able to be like, whoa, May upped it? Ah, I don't know, I don't know.

I guess it's so incremental that you wouldn't notice and then one day you'd suddenly be like, when did this all happen? Yeah, I was gonna say, if you up it, don't tell us. No. And then see if anyone notices, we're fortunate or like, I think May upped it. I love upped it as it,

I love it too. As my jaw becomes like a square and a little bristly. Yeah, I don't know, we'll see. A bristly square. A bristly square, yeah. But Thomas, do you think I would like your daily life? Editing yourself on the podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, you'd have fun. Editing yourself on the podcast. What about your co-stars then from shows you've worked on, like Fortune Would You Be Arnold? Arnold! He's got baby donkeys. He does live a pretty great life. He works out every day though. I don't know how I feel about that. It's intense. Yeah. Do you think Jennifer Aniston's life's pretty good? I mean I think as much as, I can't say as much as anyone, I think Jen's got the good days and the bad days

and all of that kind of stuff. But it would be very interesting to be Jennifer Aniston for a day and be one of the most famous people, not that that's what I'm in search of or would want, but to be that. Yeah. And to, I just would be so interesting.

It would be fascinating. Yeah, to stroll around. Yeah, yeah. And you could really, like if you're inhabiting her body for a day, you could really, like when she got back in her body, she'd be like, why is everyone acting weird around me? What happened yesterday?

And it'd be like that you went to Soho House and like did some weird stunt. Actually, it would be kind of interesting to be Arnold for a day because he's been a movie star for so many decades and then was the governor. And when people see him out in the world, there's a reaction to him like I've never seen with any other big celebrities that I've worked with. Really? him like I've never seen with any other big celebrities that I've worked with.

Really? It's like people can't believe it and like lose their minds. Yeah. And he, but he just kind of keeps walking, you know, he'll take pictures of people, but he kind of, he just like lives his life. That's cool. He's not fazed by any of it, but he also knows the, what he was bringing to the table. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, he's aware. And then he does a lot of charity work and stuff,

so he just immediately can go to places and help. Yeah, but we talked about some celebrities, if you see that they just dropped into a wedding, you see those pictures, and then some celebrities, if they did that, you'd be like, get out of my wedding. You have to be a certain level, and if you misjudged that. Tom Hanks is taking pictures with bride and grooms and you're like oh my god Tom Hanks

crashed a wedding. That's cool. Yes but I don't know I can think of a few where they'd show me that I'm here and you'd be like okay we're just in the middle of the vows actually. Can you please get out of our pictures sir? But I told you that's like kind of my pet peeve across the board, no matter who you are. Oh, people dropping into weddings. Yeah, yeah, because I feel like it's so like

aware of yourself. Like I am a celebrity and I'm gonna blow your mind. Right, yes. You know? Yeah, yeah. It's not my thing. Well, you're not really into that celebrity thing anyway. You wouldn't be excited.

If it were my wedding, I would be like, why are we trying to take wedding photos? Why are you jumping in here? But even if, whether you're into celebrity or not, that is telling of what you think of yourself, that you're such a big deal, that you're gonna blow people's minds. But I don't think that celebrity is saying,

hey, you guys want a picture with me, right? I think probably the branding room was like, oh my God, come take a picture with us. I would assume. But some people do jump in and whatever, whatever. It's not my thing. It's not my thing. So co-hosts were saying Jennifer Aniston

and then out of the pod, you guys are saying me, even though you'd be disappointed. It'd be you like 10 years ago. Sure. When you were. I would even wanna be May right now. When you were like in your wild dating couples. I would even wanna just be May right now,

settled down May. Like what is that like? Are there, well yeah, because in my mind, settled down May is still like, whoa, oh my God, I'm settled down. Well, I was about to say Tig, you seem so elated with your life and your wife and your kids that that wouldn't be, that would be a lovely thing to experience as well.

Yeah, I mean, I'd have to eat a lot more salads than I'm used to. I really would, I'd like to hang out with Biggie for a day. So I mean, he is pretty great. He's so great. Oh my God. I'm kind of boring, but my life's pretty fun. I know, I was gonna say,

I think we all have pretty great lives. Yeah. But it would just be an interesting thing to, because there was certainly a version of myself, even though I didn't, I wasn't involved in the things that May has been involved in and to the degrees that May has been involved, but I never imagined myself happily married

or anything like that. And so, yeah, I don't know. I just find it really interesting and exciting. I think- It's electrifying. Yeah, yeah. I think, I think. It's electrifying. Yeah, yeah. I think that we're all having different versions of electrifying.

Big time. Well, what a pod. What a pretty little episode. Pretty little episode. Those are great questions. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, for sure. And sometimes we, there aren't answers to questions.

Sometimes we can't play the answers to questions, whether it's not appropriate or it doesn't fit in the format. There's not enough time, but please keep sending in your questions and answers or just questions or just answers. Throw in a weird, just send in an answer and we'll just guess what the hell you're talking about. That's kind of a good idea,

send in an answer and then we'll guess the question. Yeah, go to speakpipe.com slash handsome pod. And that's where you can leave your question and your answer. I do like it when people tell us where they live. That's always interesting to me. That is interesting. I love an accent too. That's exciting.

I'm curious about age too, if you wanna throw in your age. Just so I get a full picture. Whatever you wanna share. But the link for speakpipe.com slash handsome pod is on our social media pages. You can find it there. Boom. Well, thanks again and until next time.

Keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, May Martin, Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Ouellette, email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsomepod. What a podcast! Calling all homeowners, we here at Handsome want to tell you about Allstate. We know that price is the top consideration when you're looking for home insurance. And you want a great policy too. So check out Allstate, make a change, and start saving money the fast and easy way. Check Allstate first and you can save $574

on your home insurance. No hassle, just savings. You're in good hands with Allstate. Not available in every state based on the national average annual savings for new home insurance customers surveyed in 2023 who switched to Allstate and reported savings. Savings vary.