Handsome - Pretty Little Episode #60

Episode Date: October 10, 2025

Mae and Tig give themselves some advice, name their favorite ghosts, and air their grievances on a dreamy Pretty Little Episode!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterSubmit your questions to speakpipe.com/handsomepodFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTubeThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. All state North American insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Handsome Pot. Chatting the friends on the Handsome Pot. Pretty little episode. Welcome to The Handsome Pod. It's me, your very dear friend Tignotaro, sitting here with my co-host. Your close personal friend, May Martin. Hello, May. Hello, TIG. Now, tell me what is going on behind you.

Oh, this is the same old thing, this pile of clothes. They're all going to get donated. I was going to sell them. My friend who lives in my backhouse was going to sell them and keep the cash, but nobody wants to buy them on Facebook Marketplace. So we're going to just donate. I have a new idea. Oh, donation is great.

Yeah, why? But you could also promote this online. that it's just a mixed bag of random stuff from May Martin. And yeah, and so you pay a certain amount of money that you know is going to go to charity. Yeah. And it's just a mixed bag. You just, you get it in the mail and, oh, my gosh, there's a shoe,

there's a bow tie, there's a mustache, there's a toothbrush. Yeah. There's one sock. A piece of quartz. Yeah. A blazer. Yeah. That's a good idea.

I like that. I mean, I'm already like, it's a hive of industry here with these like animal books I'm sending out. It's crazy. My house is so full of stuff. And how, how is homeowning going all these months later? I just have not here enough, but I have big, I got big plans. I, you know, I'm going to get an ice plunge maybe or. I thought you were saying ice skating rink.

I wouldn't be shocked. I wouldn't either. You know what? I got a dartboard. professional dartboard and I'm going to put it outside and uh what makes it professional well the I think the quality it's dense cork and uh sharp sharp sharp sharp sharp dark yeah I might become one of those people with like personalized darts and yeah do you play have you played darts I imagine you'd be weirdly good at it like fulls eye I have played darts um in fact when I was in

Toronto for season one of Starfleet Academy, this isn't darts, but it's a, it's a brutal version of darts. I was doing axe throwing at targets for charity. And did you find it intuitive? Yeah. Yeah. Have you thrown an axe? Never, never done it. Nor had I, my friend. And it was, it was really fun and satisfying. Yeah, the sound when it thunk into the. Yeah. Yeah. Were you throwing them just at a target or at like a at a target yeah it was like a it was a bullseye oh cool mm-hmm okay that's good but i've also done the sharp metal darts and i've also done the velcro darts which max and fin have okay i just like the idea of with darts you can stay very still and then it's just like a flick of the wrist and oh man one time my mom threw one it went in the

bullseye, then she threw another one and it stuck into the back of that dart. It was, you had to see it to believe it. I have a photo of it. It was like, I don't think I'd even believe it if I saw it. I'll be honest. Bullseye on bullseye. It was crazy mic drop moment from Wendy. Wow. Yeah. But I had to get a dartboard because Foo's balls become too competitive and we started, we're drifting into dangerous territory because we started putting like five bucks on a game kind of thing. Oh, may. I know. And we've introduced money. And so And not only that, but high stakes. I know. And I lose every time. So, yeah. Now it's going to be darts for a while. Okay. Well, I'm open to you going pro. Thank you. In one of those shiny acrylic shirts.

I don't know what people wear in the world of darts, but they're shiny? I feel like they're dressed kind of like bowlers. Like they wear, yeah, shiny shirts. Maybe they wear, yeah, shiny shirts. Maybe they're. of sort of glasses and I feel like it's the only professional sport where you can like nurse a beer while you do it like I swear they it's like part of the culture I feel like people do that with golf right do they you're on the course maybe have like a little cooler of beer I don't know I really don't know fortunate tell us soon with her um her new job as a caddy oh right for will I was like, wait, fortune golf. Like, yeah, well, I guess we'll find out. I mean, I hate to add another thing to the list,

but I would love to have you over to play darts. Not ice skate? Can you imagine? Just like the amount of energy it would take to keep that cold in L.A. too, like just this, like, deafening roar of the air conditioning and the freezer and the... It wouldn't be good for the environment. No, it would be bad, yeah. No. No. Oh, well. We can ask Fortune about that too. Yeah. About ice skating. I don't know. I'm sure she's working on a film about ice skating or something, you know. I have a question. Have you ever had a dream about me or fortune? No. Of course not. What do you mean? Of course not.

We haven't penetrated your subconscious? No. Nothing has. I don't really have dreams often. No, really? Yeah. Every now and then a little something happens and I'll wake up and I'll be like, oh, that was a slight dream, I guess. Yeah. What about you? You have vivid dreams. Yeah, and usually very literal about stuff going on in my life or like exes or family, but I've never had a handsome dream.

And I think that's because our relationship is very uncomplicated. There's nothing to work out in my subconscious. Like, it's a healthy relationship. Yeah. Yeah. It's, it is what it seems to be. Yeah. Yeah. Well, aside from all the simmering sexual tension, of course, which will one day explode. Simmering sexual tension and simmering rage. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yes. But yeah. So you feel like because there's not some sort of underlying drama that you're not dreaming. Well, when I dream, it's usually like a conversation I want. want to have with someone that I haven't.

But I wouldn't, I'd love to have you guys pop up in a dream and just say hi. Say hi. You know what I mean? So just to go back to that, there's not anything that, and maybe this isn't the place to do it, but there's not anything you want to like clear the air with me about or. Any grievances to air? Yeah. Yeah.

Um, let me, well, with fortune, there's the lingering resentment about the Alanis Moriss that incident. Oh, of course. That'll never go away. But on a serious level. Yeah. As serious as we can be on here. Is there something you wish I'd do differently?

No, I think I feel really respected and supported. You know, I'd love to spend more time together, frankly. Well, you know, that's not going to happen. Exactly, yeah. Yeah. But no, what about you? Anything you want to air? I don't feel comfortable on the show.

Oh, okay. Yes. Yes, of course. Your agent will reach out to my. Yes. Yes. I'm actually without an agent. Oh, fuck.

Yes. I didn't know this. Did you? Because my agents got nervous when they heard about that. Agents got nervous when they hear about people dropping their, or going agent-free. And so they were like, I think that they were like, but we're good, right? That's hilarious. I know, I know.

That is so funny. They're going to be contagious. I was just ready to just kind of. of set sail in a new direction and um you know no hard feelings um and um you know i still want to work but i just um i just i just want to go in a new direction yeah and it's tough when you're generating your own projects and stuff too it is kind of like yeah but i bet i bet those agents are dreaming about you now should we get to a question i think we should we should Hi, everybody. My name is Megan, and I am going to ask you a question. Here it is. Can't wait. Can you name your favorite ghost.

My favorite ghost? I love that question. But am I hearing that correctly? My favorite ghost. Yeah. You know what I'm thinking about that song by, is it Kate, Kate, I'm running up that hill. Kate Bush? Yeah, Kate Bush. Isn't that about like the ghost in Wuthering Heights or something? I don't know, but it's a phenomenal song. Yeah. Hmm. Favorite ghost. Is that your favorite ghost? No. No. My favorite ghost has got to be the telltale heart one. And, you know, Edgar Allan Poe wrote that story. There's like a, he hears, I think he murdered someone, this guy, and he hears the beating heart from under his floorboards. And like when the cops come, he's so afraid they're going to hear the beating heart. So I think that ghost had it right. It was like really mess with someone who killed you, torment them with your beating heart.

I think that's a cheeky little ghost. And I'm on board. Yeah. Okay. I don't, I mean, this question, this person is assuming I have a favorite ghost. Well, what are some ghosts? Like, you got Casper. I mean, Casper's the most famous ghost, right?

Yeah, I think so. Oh, maybe Christmas passed. I still feel like Casper. Yeah. Yeah, because I feel like no matter how old you are, you know, about Casper. Yeah. Whereas maybe not everyone knows about Christmas past. You're right.

Until a certain age. But is he your favorite? it? Well, that's the thing is it's like they all fall in the same category of who gives the shit? Oh, you heard it here. Wait, but have you ever seen one? No. Okay, yeah, because that might be your favorite if you'd seen one. I haven't either, but I mean, I just don't know. You know, I think as I talked about on the Andrea Gibson episode, the Kristen Shawl episode. I feel Andrea in a different way than I felt anybody. But I don't know that I see Andrea as a ghost. Yeah, that you would go so far as to say a ghost. But I feel it's challenged my thoughts and beliefs

about the afterlife. Even, you know, I told you before we got started, Andrea's wife Meg is staying with me right now and we had a conversation and a thing happened that was, we were just stunned the way things lined up and handed us over to something where we were all full of goosebumps and tears. and that's just one of those examples of like,

this is challenging me, but I just don't know. Yeah, I'm curious whether this person is going to name like a famous ghost or one from their personal life. I would say without a famous ghost attached to this conversation, I would say I love an old, old ghost rattling chains. Like, it's just so silly. Yeah, a classic where you're like, where'd you get those chains? Yeah.

Why? Why are you doing that? And why did you tell your friends to do that? Yeah. I don't mind a ghost that's dripping with weeds and stuff from the water. That's pretty good. A swamp. Now, also, do you become a ghost right when you die?

Only some. Only some. Okay. Some. I think you get the choice, maybe. Are you making things? things up, you know? Well, yeah, of course. Oh, yes, of course, yes. And if I can, yeah, the main fact is, when you die, you get a choice. And they say, do you want to be a ghost?

And if so, do you want some chains? Or do you just want to do your own thing? Okay. Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on your own thing. car insurance is smart. Unfortunately, not checking that you save your passwords onto your new computer is not smart. You don't want to be stuck clicking, I forgot my password every time you want to log into, well, anything. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds.

You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Should we hear? Let's hear Megan's answer. Let's hear Megan's answer. And Megan, I apologize. I just, I don't, I'm not attached to this ghost thing. My answer is, no, because I have way too many and you get to listen to me list all of them. First is timer from Ghostbusters, the animated series, not the live action. Beetlejuice from the animated or the live action movie animated series.

And then Marley from a Christmas carol, but specifically the performance by Stadler and Waldorf in the Muppet Christmas Carol. Oh, my God. Bruce Willis in the sixth sense. I don't remember the character's name, but I do remember finding out he was a ghost of being shocked. Last, Casper. Just a legend. Yeah. Okay.

I hope you loved my list. Thank you so much for answering my question. Absolutely, Megan. Megan's listed every famous ghost there. Yes. I love the, the Muppet ghosts. That's true. Yeah.

And Casper made number one, basically. Casper made number one. That sounds like waste, like human waste. Made number one. Yeah, very good. Apologies for that addition. Yeah, I just do not feel attached to ghost stuff. stuff. Yeah. And then I, you know, if I was, if we had a ton of time, I'd want to dig into some of those

that Megan List didn't say, is Beetlejuice a ghost technically? Or is he a sort of demon that you summon? Like, you know, I'm, you're out. I don't care. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Who cares? I don't care. And I'm sorry if I'm offending people that care about it. I just don't. Listen, there's something for everyone in this pod, you can send your lists of ghosts to me. And you're okay with me being honest? Do you think Megan is? Because she sounds like she would be open to me not caring. Oh, totally. I think in a way it's a badge of honor. People would be delighted by you not caring. Okay. All right. Well, May Martin, should we get one more question? Well, Tignotaro, yes, please. Thank you. Let's do it. Hey, TIG, May and Fortune. This is

Kristen, calling from North Carolina. Woo-hoo! I just listened to one of your episodes, and you said you love giving advice. So here's a twist on that. Let's say you were to meet yourself 10 years down the road. What advice would that 10-year-older self give to each one of you? Like 10, like so 64, Jesus, 64-year-old TIG. That's in 10 years, guys.

64-year-old TIG. What advice would I give TIG may end fortune? Or give yourself, I think. Yeah. Oh, okay. Again, we're getting into the weeds with a whimsical question that requires some suspension of disbelief.

But yeah, okay. Yeah, that is, okay, 10. I mean, in a way, that's just saying, what advice now do you need to hear? You know, you know what I mean? Yeah. And for me, it's always stop trying so hard

wow that came out of the depths of my soul well that's good just in general stop trying like just go lightly you know let things roll and evolve and don't feel this like tension yeah what about you well I guess like to go back to what you're saying are you saying like you need to have more just faith in yourself Yeah. And like, yeah, because I think the trying and overthinking and stuff comes from like a fear of failure. Like what will happen if I don't, if I don't try this hard that I'm like burning out, then I'm going to lose it all. Like instead of just trusting, you know, that things will, what will be will be. I don't know. That's a fine line.

For sure. You've got to try a bit. For sure. Sure. Yeah. I like that. I'll probably spend more time with my parents, too. I mean, I see them a lot, considering we live in different cities, but I want to see them more. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. I would say, I think that the time that I spend with people, whether it's my friends, Stephanie, my family, Max and Finn, just to really prioritize that. which I am in the process of doing and in that time to be present, more present than ever. Yeah. And it's, you know, so overstated and it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, of course everyone needs to spend more quality time and be present. But like I really, you know, I have moments where I'm like, I'm walking through my life. doing things. I'm taking Max and Finn to baseball and picking them up from school and having

dinner. And then, you know, I'm always stopping and having to my phone dings. And I, just this morning, it bothered me when Finn was talking to me while I was returning an email and I was like, hold on, hold on, hold on, let me, let me respond to this. It just felt terrible. Right, right. And he patiently stood there and waited. There wasn't like a conflict, but inside of me, I was like, God, that feels so gross. Yeah. You know? Yeah, you're right. It's so easy to say, but it is the main thing, right? Yeah. It's being present. Yeah. And that when I'm, because I took him to a doctor's appointment this morning and just when we were waiting to go in, he had a question for me. And I'm like, hold on, Finn. Hold on. Let me just respond to this. Yeah. And he was like,

Okay. And then I was like, ugh. I don't like, not that I was saying it to, I'm like, stop it. Let me finish it. It was just more of this distracted, like my phone buzzed. And it's like, why am I? I should just not. And I don't respond to everything all the time as soon as it comes in. I'll definitely let things pile up and respond to it later. But I just, it was a reminder of less of that. Less of that. I used to really enjoy, like, Like if I had a doctor's appointment and my mom would take me or my dad, it would be a little outing and you like get a snack and you chat and you listen to shit in the car on the radio and it's just like a nice one-on-one time. Max and Finn love it. They have like a little special day because we go drop off one at school and then the other one leaves with us to go to the doctor's appointment. And yeah, we'll usually stop and go to the bookstore or get a bagel or something.

ends up just being just a tiny little special moment together. Oh, I love that. More of that. Should we hear Kristen's answer? I think we should. So my answer is nurture your relationships. Hey. Life is short.

Treat people with respect, kindness, and curiosity. That was my dog. He's out chasing dear. Love you all. you for the love, light, and joy you bring into our lives every week. Love that. And also the sound of those crunching footsteps sounds like the opening of a true crime podcast. I'm walking through Des Moines, Iowa. Whatever. Yeah. De Moines. Yeah, I love that. I had my premiere of my show in Toronto and afterwards, my friend just unexpectedly wrote me

an email about it. And, you know, and people had texted or been like, congrats. But she sent me just the most thoughtful email. It was like three paragraphs just like about our friendship. And it meant so much. And then I wrote back and I was like, God, that makes that little thing makes such a difference. Absolutely. It's so, it's so nice to take those moments and more of that, more of that, more of that. So next time I have to go to the dentist, will you take me and we'll have a little day? Yeah, I'll take you to the bookstore and get a bagel. Yeah, take you to get a little Blueberry bagel. Oh, I'd love it. I'd love it. And please keep sending in your questions.

Our handsome and pretty little listeners, send them into speakpipe.com slash handsome pod. And also share episodes that you like with people that you like and help build this handsome community. Yeah, we love hearing from you and we love you and each other and ourselves. That is true. true and more special, special time. Focus, time with loved ones. And until next time, May. Well, TIG.

Let's keep it. Pretty handsome. What a podcast. What a podcast. What a podcast. That was a hate gum podcast. Checking Allstate First for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance is smart. Unfortunately, not checking that you.

updated your playlist is not smart. Your collection of super upbeat dance songs is fantastic, but probably not appropriate for the meditation group you're supposed to lead this afternoon. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability, Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.