Handsome - Pretty Little Episode #84

Episode Date: March 27, 2026

Tig and Mae deal with FOMO and share their silliest lies on a truly delightful Pretty Little Episode! Don't forget to get tickets to our May 4 Live Show in LA!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterSubmit your questions to speakpipe.com/handsomepodFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTubeThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. Not checking what baseball team your friend's kid is on before cheering for a home run. It can get a little awkward. I just cheered for them losing their game. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds.

You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings varies subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Chatting the friends on the handsome pot. Chatting the friends on the handsome pot. Pretty little episode. Explain yourself. This is welcome.

How does this show start? Welcome to. You go ahead. Oh, welcome to a pretty little episode of the handsome pot. Did you like that, TIG? Well, who are you? Oh, wow. No, no, I'm saying like who are, you haven't announced the host. Oh, I may.

Yeah. Oh, my God. I'm joined by. Tignotaro. Now, who is this other little friend? Well, I'm not sure yet. I'm still getting to know him, but on tour I did. Oh, my God.

I've said on tour that I love like trinkets and stuff. And now I've created this situation where I'm like, Ghalam, like, people are bringing me these amazing things. So someone. Wait, so this is amazing. I would say go to YouTube, but I guess I am annoying people by saying that, but fine, you're going to miss out on this amazing. It's an item. It's a possum.

So I'm holding a handmade possum creature that is so characterful. Like it just looks kind of stressed out. and I love it. It's very cute. I have kind of a problem now that at every show I'm getting these amazing gifts. And yeah, I don't know where to keep them all or what to do. And do you need to keep them all? Well, a lot of them are kind of magical, like crystals and spells.

And I don't want to be cursed if I throw them out. So no, I'm keeping them. I'm going to have to have a good case. You and I could not be more different, May. Yeah, you're like, I wouldn't. Like, where do I put all? my little stuffed possums people are giving me. It's very nice, these gestures, and it's so up your alley. It's hilarious. It's crazy how well-chosen these things are. This is a book of Canadian

trivia that someone gave me. And she goes, she goes, hey peanut butter, bitch. I go, hey girl, she goes, and she goes, you're not going to believe this, but peanut butter was invented in Canada. I was like, I'm in heaven. Wow. In like 18 something, we invented peanut butter. It took us that long as humans to grind peanuts? Yeah, that seems weird because we were grinding corn, we were grinding wheat. Why didn't someone say put a nut in there, you know? Wow. Yesterday, this woman said, let's take a photo as if I'm at TIG's meet and greet, one as if I'm at Fortune's Meet and greet and one is if I'm at your meeting greet. So the TIG photo was us standing side by side, just sort of not touching but smiling politely. The Fortune one was being like, hey, pointing at

each other. And then the mean one, she just like wraps onto me like a koala. I was like, okay, I guess I guess this is my reputation. So is that, do you feel like that's, because I feel like that is true with me. I would stand politely next to somebody. Yeah. And, uh, And but you feel like a full embrace makes most sense for you. That's the precedent I've set. And you're going with it. I'm going with it. Yeah, I'm a little, I like a hug.

Okay. Well, here's how you and I are also different. The suitcase on the bed. Oh, my God. I know. I know. And the fact that it didn't even stick out to you to think like, I'm recording. I'm going to take my suitcase.

off of my bed. But here's where we're alike, little cowboy. Please. Green suitcase and a green suitcase. Yes, 100% always green suitcase. Yeah. Dark forest green. Yes. Well, I'm moving out of the bus today for, tonight I'm in a hotel, then I'm back in L.A. for a week. But I'm leaving some stuff in the bus. Okay. Like all these trinkets. All the little possums and stuff. Yeah, I'm postponing the, I mean, I have so many possums. I have little cowboys. I have little raccoons. Of course you do. Yeah. I mean, what an incredible following you've created, you've developed.

I'm feeling that. I'm feeling so grateful. So someone, you need to give me the context on this. Someone went, don't tell Tig and then showed me this. Well, because I talked on the show about my, I just, Buckees. It's. a gas station that has really clean bathrooms and a lot of shopping you can do. And people are so into this place. I think it's wonderful. But they buy the merchandise. They get the t-shirts, the stuffed animals. And I'm just like, who cares? Like, go. Empty your bladder, buy a bag of chips, fill up your car, and head out. Yeah, you don't have to worship the brand of that. Right. Right. I just, I don't like, I don't like brand worship.

And I used the example, I think it was on this show. Yeah, I used the example of like when people were really into like certain donut shops and like certain, um, yogurt, frozen yogurt. I can't even remember the name of the places. Yeah. But it became the, the cool place to get these types of food and people are wearing the merch. Yeah. And I'm just like, God. I don't know.

I'm just, yeah. I love the weird network we've created where that people are giving, people are giving me gifts specifically to annoy you. They're saying, oh, you know, all your point till it takes you is this. It's really funny. And just to be clear, I fully appreciate Buckees. I don't get the obsession over a gas station. Yeah, and the merch specifically.

Foof. Way to row me up. I know. I feel raw. How are you this morning? I'm doing well. I'm just thrilled to be home still. I just, it's, I've, I've just been back and forth between Toronto and on tour and doing press and New York and L.A. And I just, it is truly those little moments of loving to be home when it's time to go drop Max and Finn off. or go to their practice on the weekend or we sit around. I told you we do a game as a family.

This is about the only game I'll do. But we sit around in the living room and we each say a word. Yeah, I've told you that. No, remind me? Well, somebody will start off and they'll say like Wednesday. And then the next person will be like, is. And then the next person says the day, that. And then you just create a story.

and you add a word and then and then the other part of it is like Max and Finn love trying to remember what the whole sentence was and so you try and repeat it back. We got to do that on the pod. That's my kind of game. I know. So, but it says those little moments of just and also being home with Kitty City and Stephanie and anyway. And just having your routine, eating the things you want to eat, sleeping in. in your bed. Yeah, taken a walk. I'm still going to a trainer a couple of days a week. Oh, you are? Yeah, I have been since the summer. Certainly not creating a body like May Martin,

but, but yeah. Are you doing weights, though? Um, I, you know, I'm doing 55 year old weight training, you know, where I'm, yeah, I'm, you know, I'm not pumping iron. You know, but it's like toning, strengthening. It's good for your bones. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm stretching. I'm, I'm weight training. I'm still doing my daily walk.

But it just, yeah, it feels nice to be in a routine. And Stephanie and I in the morning sit and chat and we take a walk together. And it's just nice to start my day that way. That's nice. Yeah. Yeah. It all feels good. Wait.

I get back for 10 days and then I'm pretty much. much gone for six weeks or more. It's going to be, I've got to find ways to stay sane. Uh-huh. Yeah, a little. I think exercise really is what does it. Like, just, I'm going to get a yoga mat and a couple weights and just like. For the bus? Yeah. Just try and do something before every show or something. Do you do those bands? Yeah. I love those bands. Yeah. Those seem like a really nice travel workout option. Yeah. Shall we get to a question?

Oh, right. That's why we're doing this. It's not to just show off your green suitcase and your possums. Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. Not checking that you bought pizza dough for pizza night?

Oh no! Now we're stuck waiting 90 minutes for the delivery order to arrive. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check all state first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands of all state. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Yeah, let's get to a question. Hey, handsome. This is Ray from Toronto. And I want to know what the silliest, unnecessary lie you've ever told is.

Yeah. I have one that's really embarrassing. A lie that was, um, unnecessary? Do you have to do your internet? Aside from the Wi-Fi. But you know what? It was in that same era. It was right around then. I had a show booked at Largo. I was just going to do a set at Largo. I was still new-ish to L.A. and so excited that I was even getting sets at Largo. But often when I'm falling in love and becoming obsessed, I end up canceling things. And I don't know what happened, but I texted Flanny at Largo and I go, I don't, I've got to come clean about this to him. I go, I had a massage and the person was walking on me and I heard, I hurt my back. I've had like a spot. So that was a full

made up line. I don't know why I said that. Hold on. Were you getting a massage? No. Okay. So that's such really weird elaborate line. I know. And he texts, he goes, do I need to call an ambulance? And I'm like, no, no, no, I'm right. No, no, no. I'm naked in bed. I'm completely fine. I'm in love. I'm just in like, yeah, I don't know why. It needed to be something, oh God. Yeah, I've really broken that habit. I mean, I really, how did you break the habit? I don't, I just, you know, the podcast helped. I think fortune noticing that sometimes I was like sending these. long explanations for why I was late and things like that. I was like, yeah, as my mother would

call them fougaboos. Fugaboos, yeah. You were fugabooing. I was fugabooing and it all comes from like people pleasing and just not wanting to be in trouble and having bad time management, but I think I've turned a corner, but that was crazy, blaming some fictional masseuse for breaking my back in some way. And then having to see Flannie like the next week for another show and he's like, did you have to limp or anything? I was like, oh yeah, it turned out to be fine. Oh my God.

Oh. So embarrassing. What about you? An unnecessary lie. Well, I really try to stick as close to the truth. But I feel like I prank people a lot. Yeah. I was out with around the time that Wayward came out, I was out with Tony Collette, and she said, wouldn't it be funny if I texted this other actor in Wayward who they only had a couple scenes together. They weren't even like, and she said, I'm going to text him and say that I want to sing a song with him at the premiere on stage. And it was like the next day. And it was just such a funny prank because it wasn't like they had an established relationship of pranking. It was,

So she texts him, hey, Josh, May wants us to sing this song. I've got a guitar. I don't have any time to rehearse, but I know that hopefully you know the chords. And he was freaking out. He was so stressed. And she didn't even tell him it was a prank until like four hours later. She was like, just kidding. But it really made me laugh.

Yeah. Yeah, I was with years ago. I used to live in Venice out by the beach. You're in California. and my old pal Henry Phillips, who is such a ridiculous man. He's a musical comedian and he does stand up as well, but like he makes videos online, just a silly, silly guy. Yeah. And we used to do things called party bits. And he was at a party in Venice and he called me and he said, hey, I'm at a party. And he said, hey, I'm at a party near your house. He said, I don't know anybody here. He was like, you got to come,

you got to come and do some party bits with me. And we would just like prank people at parties. And so I was like, oh, okay, I'll be right over. So I go over there and we're just doing stupid, subtle things that where people are looking at us, you know, like we're odd, which we were. And then I was by myself when Henry had wandered off. And there were like, maybe five people chatting in the kitchen. Yeah. And again, I knew no one but Henry Phillips. And I leaned on the door frame.

And I just, I said, hey, guy. And this is a Saturday night. And it was like 9.30 at night. And I lean on the doorframe. And I go, hey, guys, I'm going to be going to bed in like 10 minutes. And then I just tap the wall and walk away. And you know, they were all just like, who was that? And then so I go up to Henry and I said, oh my gosh, I just told these five random strangers in the kitchen that I'm going to be going to bed in like 10 minutes.

And he was like, oh, my God, that's so funny. He said, there's like 200 people in the backyard. He said, you have to go yell that on the back patio. And so I was like, okay. So I walk out to the back deck and I was like, and people are all, I mean, it's Saturday at 9.30. Like, of course. People are having drinks and chatting. And I was like, hey, everybody.

And I don't even know, like, if the owner was in the kitchen. I'm sure. Yeah, or like in the back. I don't, I didn't know where I was. But I just like, hey, everybody, just so you know, I'm going to be going to bed in like 10 minutes. And then Henry and I go back here. We're dying, laughing. And, but here's what I stand by.

That doesn't mean. I own the house. That just means I'm going to bed in like 10 minutes, you know? Totally. Yeah. Yeah. If anyone tries to, yeah, that's so funny. Yeah, I love that kind of stuff so much. When was that? Was that recent? No, it was a lot. It was when I lived in Venice. It was probably like 20 years ago. I really think that I really think that we should start party bits at like awards shows, like big high stakes environments. That's, that's, I'd be all for it. Remind people that they have free will and they can do any silly thing at any time. Absolutely.

Should we hear Ray's answer? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Let's hear it, Ray. I once convinced my partner that the term gas lighting was originally gas lamping because it was derived from those old gas street lamps, which were notoriously unliable. and once I had him thoroughly convinced, I then told him I'd made it all up. And he just stared at me and said, you planned this? Why?

And you know, I'm not sure why. I think it just keeps me young. Anyway, I'm a big fan. I can't wait to hear your answers. That's so funny. She got list. Gotless. She got list him.

She got listed him. She gossed him. Yes. Do we have time for one more? We could do a quick one, right? Yeah. Hi, Handsoms. This is Katie from Chicago, and I have an advice question for you.

I was wondering if you have any advice about how to deal with FOMO or fear of messing out. And as a bonus question, what is the worst case of FOMO that you've ever had? Great question. Is it? I don't feel like I have FOMO. Really? Oh, I guess I do when I'm away from home. I think I've just been traveling so much that I'm like, oh, I want to be there. I want to hear all the funny things everybody's saying and yeah, yeah. Yeah, you're kind of living in a state of FOMO when you're away. Yeah. I guess I was thinking of the outside world. I don't really experience that with the outside world. I can think of one time in my 20s that. I was in like a Soho house in London, and Harry Stiles came in. And so we were all freaking out in my group. And we were kind of following him around, you know, at a safe distance and just

observing him. And poor guy, poor guy. But we were like, should we talk to him? Yeah, I'm sure that's the only time. I feel like his entire life is being observed as a wild animal from a distance. Yeah. And he was so tall and handsome, and we were like, who's going to have the courage to talk to him? And then it was getting later and later, and I was like, I got to go. And he kind of maybe peripherally knew someone in our group, but he was very closed off. So then I went home, and 20 minutes later, my friend texted me a photo of her linking arms with Harry Styles and drinking from champagne glasses. Like, she just went for it. As soon as I left, she was like, ah, fuck it.

Went up and was like, hi, I'm Lolly, nice to meet you. And then they ended up drinking champagne together. And I was like, wow. Yeah. You just missed it. Yeah, if I just stuck it out. Yeah. Oh, Katie.

Let's hear your answer, Katie. Yeah, let's hear it. Katie. I don't have an answer to the first question. But my answer for the second question is that May is coming to my city on their tour. But I'm currently super pregnant. And they're going to be here on my due date. So I can't come see you live because I might.

giving birth. So that is the biggest case of FOMO that I've ever had. And I really wish I could come see you live. Thank you so much for the show. I'm a huge fan. We love listening and looking forward to hearing your answer. That's so nice. Why don't you drive your bus over and help deliver the baby? That's so funny that my first thought was she should come and have the baby at the show. No. But no, I should go to hospital. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You should pull. up screeching. Yeah. Which room is Katie in? Oh, yeah, I've had friends

from Texas and wherever tell me that they bought tickets to your tour and go into your city. Yeah. Oh, that's so nice. Yeah. That's so nice. Yeah, it's fun to hear. I'm just finishing my third show in Florida. And I did go to Disney

yesterday and that was a mistake. I'm so, I'm on like four hours of sleep in night and I thought, I got to just sneak to Orlando to Disney and I forgot how it makes your body feel like your bones are dust, like jangled up. Yeah. But it was pretty great. Yeah. I really like Orlando. I have to say. There's so many cute people think of it as only Disney, but there's so many cute little areas to walk around and eat and shop and whatever. This is a commercial for Orlando, Florida. Yeah. Anyway, well, that was fun. Good to see you.

Cowboy? Lovely. Sorry, I hiccpped. Oh, yeah, you burped. Oh, you hiccpped. I burbs, and I just said hiccough. That was a lie. I said hiccups because I was embarrassed and I burbed.

Everyone knew. Yeah. Everyone knew. Here's a commercial for us on May 4th. We're doing our Netflix as a joke show where we are interviewing the cast of the hunting wives. So please come out in person. and also submit your questions and advice request to speakpipe.com slash handsomepod. And what have you got coming up, TIG?

Well, I just, I have my tour dates at Tignotaro.com, you know, and as I've mentioned a few times, some have had to be rescheduled for this award season, as they call it. Just back-to-back press and dinners and all kinds of stuff that I'm not normally doing. So go check out where the dates are and they could move, you know. Always go back and check the website if you can. And also come see me in the good light on Apple TV. And until next time, keep it pretty handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feimster, Tignitaro, and Mae Martin.

The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Wulet. email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and follow us on social media at handsomepod. What a podcast. What a podcast. Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance, and that's smart. Not checking that you put your slippers next to the bed before going to sleep. Very sad times. I really don't like it when my feet have to touch the cold floor even for one instant.

Yeah, checking first is smart. Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings varies, subject to terms, conditions, and availability, Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.