Handsome - Sarah Silverman asks WHY?!

Episode Date: July 29, 2025

Handsome celebrates its 100th episode with Sarah Silverman returning to the pod to ask one of the biggest questions of them all... WHY?! Plus, a Handsome 3 way, Thomas saving the day, Mae playing the Handsome theme for their mum, and more! Thanks for keeping it Handsome for 100 episodes!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTubeThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Handsome Pod. Chattin' with friends on the Handsome Pod. Chattin' with friends on the Handsome Pod. Cheers. Welcome to the Handsome Pod. We're T're taking Fortune. And we're joined by. May Martin. Woo. Oh my gosh, Fortune, as I look at your beautiful,

handsome t-shirt, I realize I left all of my merchandise in Nashville. No. No. Yeah, yeah. I'm so bummed. Where did you leave it? In a Nashville.

In a garbage can. In the theater, the hotel? I guess in the theater. Yeah, I think I left it backstage. It looks great on you, Fortune. It looks great. Look, I'm wearing us on my shirt. Thomas, is there a way I can still get merchandise?

Oh, yeah, we can send you some. That's what I like to hear. Look at that. Well, I'm wearing this you guys, because today is a very, very special episode in the Handsome Podcast. Well, my friend, today we are celebrating our 100th episode.

What? Can you believe it? That's wild. That's insanity. I thought we're gonna make it past that first April. We're at two years in. We've made it past two Aprils. Yeah. Congrats guys. And we're on shirts. It's one of my longest, healthiest relationships. I know. And I feel like we just keep getting stronger and better and our communications improved. Yes. Did we have that communication? Well, we communicate a lot now

more than we did two years ago. That's true. We would be good candidates now if we wanted to try a triad in our lives, cause we're really good now at like a three way relationship I think. Wait, what is a triad?

It's a threesome? A threeple. Yeah. That's what a triad is? Yeah, a triad. What about a triathlon? That's something else. We can each take on one different part of the, um,

athelon. That is definitely different than a throuple. What's a triathlon again? Biking, swimming, running? Yes. Oh, it's all cardio. I don't want to do any of them. No, can I lift a little weight instead?

You won't be in a triathlon, but you sure can. Yeah, you can stand around and flex. I think you would prefer to be in a thr't be in a triathlon, but you sure can. Yeah. You can stand around and flex. I think you would prefer to be in a throuple than a triathlon. Do you guys, are you surprised by how I mean, I'm surprised by not that I didn't know it would be great this podcast, but it's become so big and beautiful. And what a community. Right when I think that it's not as popular or big then I go somewhere else and then I don't know,

I don't, I'm shocked every, I guess that's all I'm saying. I'm shocked every time I'm shocked that people listen, who listens, and what they get out of it, the different ages, the demographics, all of it. I'm just like, oh my Lord, it's such a fun treat to unwrap each time.

And how well everybody knows us now. Like, because in two years, we've all been through life changes and talked about it and it really is like, I feel like people really know us. It's nice. I feel like I know you guys a lot better. Yeah, for sure. Cause when we started this, all of us were friends, but there were a lot of things we didn't know about each other. Yes. Yes. And we've had some giggly times, we've had hard times, we've had really hard times.

And then we've giggled again. Yeah, it always comes back to the giggles, which I love. And then we giggled again. Yeah. I think that's an interesting opening too. What have we learned about each other that is surprising? Oh, good question. Thank you. Because I would say it's a lot of it is surprising because the podcast was built on, hey, we're all friends in the comedy world, but we don't know each other deeply well. But we've enjoyed running into each other in the comedy scene. And so we've certainly gotten to know each other's, you know, highs,

lows, quirks, and, you know, all of those things. So what is surprising? Okay, what jumps out for me is like, well, we all have our you know, you have your kind of stage persona or whatever And I guess I always like fortune. I would say you're you're you're so bubbly and self-deprecating and stuff but I I've it's been wonderful to also meet this like Warrior inside you like you are also a very confident, very astute, very driven person. And so that's been cool. Like it's, you know what I mean? And then Tig conversely, who, you know, you have a high status. Yeah, Tig conversely, you're just sitting around insecure, not driven. No, there's like a real softness and sweetness that, I mean, I didn't know, I obviously knew that was there,

but like there's a self-deprecating soft sweetness there as well. So I guess it's just the different shades of ourselves that I've, you know, that we're three dimensional people, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. And so what did you think was the one-dimensional part of us?

Well, like I guess, yeah, like fortune, like self-deprecation and- Like a goofball. Yeah, and you're kind of dry wit and- Yeah, and so it's been nice, yeah. What'd you guys learn about me? Well, you have I didn't you you have such a curiosity about things and you're you're more You're harder on yourself than I would have ever guessed because I you when I met you you seem so confident and you are confident but

as we've gotten to know you more, you like. Riddled with insecurities. But I do feel like we've, I've seen like a more mature side of you in the last two years, it feels like you've sort of gotten to know yourself better and are more comfortable in your skin. to know yourself better and are more comfortable in your skin. And so you're starting to be more confident in as you should. And I've enjoyed seeing a transformation in you where, yeah, it just feels like you are coming into your own, which I really like seeing.

I love that. Yeah. I can, I can, I can, um, I concur. Um, I also, and I, I, so this is not at all me thinking that marriage and kids or any of that kind of way of life is for everybody, but I have found it really interesting to see you May, who, I mean, let's be honest, we all know that you can triathlon all over the place if you know what I mean. But it feels like in your curiosity and your different paths and journeys and dating and all of that, that I think you've surprised yourself at what you're actually interested in and what you might want in life.

And I think it's also still unfolding, which of course it's unfolding for all of us. But it's been really an interesting thing to watch with you. And also Stephanie and I were talking the other day about this side of you. I guess it goes into the curiosity category, but that you really are an artist that is creating and writing and searching and you just. Oh, to cry. But it's...

That's so nice. But you know, this is a business where people can just start churning things out just for the sake of churning things out. And of course you're churning things out, but you do seem to be thoughtful and doing it for artistic reasons and that you have so much to say and express and it comes through in writing TV shows or improv or comedy or music now. That's so nice. That is actually kind of a recent, like I feel like really in the past

year I've been like feeling not as constrained by like what medium it takes and being like, yeah, I'll try doing a painting. Like I'm finding it really rewarding. Yeah, that's so nice. Yeah, that's the other thing is that your paintings that you've been doing, there's so many different ways that you're expressing yourself. And I just, yeah, I wouldn't have guessed. And then I'm also always intrigued by how you just blow to shreds what people might expect from somebody who looks like you or presents in whatever way. And you just have a, it is, it's a confidence and a security in your body and your feelings

and attractions. And that's another way of expressing yourself. It's you and it's really an interesting side of you. We can end the episode here. Our little cowboy is going up. That is so nice. That is so nice. But you can so easily tell yourself stories about who you are, especially if in our jobs, like we're narrative-izing our own identity so much, and then people are then further boiling it down to write about you and your work and putting stuff on you.

So yeah, it's been nice to... Yeah, like I always was like, I'm bad at relationships, right? Where I'm like, I'm not good at monogamy and things like that. And now I'm like, yeah, it's situational. And yeah, I can really show up for people sometimes. You can. You can. I think you did get in the habit.

I saw early on with you of you telling yourself you could or couldn't do things and believing that. And I think you're getting away from that, which you should because I think like Tig said, you are surprising yourself. Ah, love it. Yeah, I mean, it's really, really cool. I had a friend, I mean, I guess I still consider her a friend. I just haven't seen her probably in decades, but she was very similar in that, like, man,

she could write any type. I remember she put out an album of instrumental surf punk, Chardee covers. What? Yeah, like she was just, she was so, and she would write plays and musicals. She's in like a heavy metal goth band now. She's just, she has so much to express

and it's just pouring out of her. And I wonder if you should meet her. But anyway. But also trying not to get hung up on like what will sell or what do people want from me next? But like what do I actually feel called to write or? Yeah, that's so cool. Yeah.

But you knew fortune better than you knew me before probably. So what surprised you about about old fortune Marie? I mean, I guess I did. But I mean, you know, I feel like we were in each other's orbits very loosely for a decade or more 1510 15 years something. But it was really, I mean, I could say, I actually feel like I maybe knew you better because you were working with Stephanie, doing those shows, doing improv together. And so I feel like it was almost an even amount of knowledge of each other.

But yeah, I think with Fortune, what has really surprised me is the, gosh,, this. Because- Are you gonna cry? I'm gonna cry. No, I'm not gonna cry. I'm not gonna cry. It's not that kind of thing at all. It's more like- This is not that deep. No, no, it's more on the heels of like,

yeah, like when you were describing yourself as a goofball, you have said you are a very business minded person. And this might just be the person in me that's not very educated. But I'm always like, gosh, fortune went to school, fortune knows stuff. Wow. And not that I thought that you were like some dumb ass, but you can bring things to a very serious grounded conversation, whether it's, I mean, it's not like we sit around

and we talk seriously about history, but I feel like you have that wealth of knowledge as much as you, but also an understanding I have of you, of your upbringing and how you, you know, the instability in your family that you wanted to write for yourself. And I think that's what's so, just so fascinating about getting to know people and like how, what just, when you understand people better and you're like, oh, they're not actually who I thought they were. And then also seeing you right now, I did not, and I hope it's not offensive, but I did not see you rising up from the ashes in the way that you have.

And it's really remarkable. And it does give me chills right now because you have been dealt a heavy load and a hard load. And I just, I'm like and I'm pretty floored. I'm pretty floored. And excited. Thanks.

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aside from like the obvious like stoicism, you know, like that idea of that theory of stoicism. It's something that I try to follow. And it's not to be misunderstood as to be you're just stoic and that you don't have feelings, but it's like you have control over how you're going to handle what's handed to you. You can make a decision how this is going to go. And I feel like you have really shown that. Oh, thank you. The rivers run deep with all of us. And you're right. You meet someone and you meet them where they're at in the moment. And then you really can only know someone when you understand

where they came from and their childhood and their teens and it's rare to have two years of talking about that stuff with, you know, in concentrated amounts of time. And you're talking about it on a podcast, but then you're also having a side conversation or, you know, and it's like, hey, this is happening or hey, you know, here's what's up. And how's this, how are we going to deal with this and how are we going to handle this? And you know, if I can just loop Thomas into this as well, I've known Thomas for a decade and man, have I seen this guy grow and change and I stand by the fact that he is by far the best, best option as a husband or father.

Not that he has kids, but I just, you know. And producer and just keeping it together and like championing us. Yeah. Yeah. One of my, I've told this many times and maybe I've told it on this podcast or I don't know, but one of my favorite Thomas moments was, um, when I, and I'm sure Thomas is tired of me telling this story, but it really does make him look so cool because he is, but I was being interviewed by a TV show on a stage after a show. They came in town, set up a

lighting situation, cameras, everything, legit, legit interview. And they started asking me questions about something that was not at all what I signed up for in this interview. And I said, oh, I'm not wanting to talk about this or that person or whatever. And I just kind of moved on and they were like, well, but why don't you? And it was like a real gotcha kind of moment where they weren't letting me out. And Thomas was my assistant at the time. And he, he walked in front of the camera and he went, this interview is over. What? I did not ask him to do it. He took total, like he, he took charge and pulled the microphone

off and he was like, we're leaving. And I just looked back at him and I was like, nicely done. Oh my god. I was so blown away. And that's this weird curve ball in Thomas where it's like, he's absolutely a decent solid dude, but here is the boundary. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And that was fun to find out. And the protectiveness there. Yeah.

That's so nice. Thank you. Would you do that for me a fortune? As long as it's done. Anytime this podcast gets out of hand, I'll step in and stop it. Yeah, this podcast is over. We can't not mention you Tig, obviously.

There's so many wonderful qualities. Not that this surprised me, but I so have appreciated the wisdom that you impart and not only on the podcast, but in real life. I think especially in this last year, going through the different things that I've gone through personally, I've had some really great private conversations with you

on the phone or on text where you are just a great friend and really show up and you don't stop at just like, it'll be okay. You like give really amazing advice and check out this book. I learned this. In my experience, I did, you know, it's just like really thoughtful, meaningful conversations with you that I've come to really appreciate and that has helped me a lot. So yeah, you just really show up for people and on the podcast you impart some really great wisdom. And I know a lot of that comes from a lot of the hard things that you've gone through and coming

out the other end of that and seeing you appreciate life. I've not seen anyone have such genuine appreciation for what you have. Yeah, yeah. Thank you. I really, there are so many things about your life that I want to emulate or find myself unconsciously like putting on my vision board and yeah, both of you, like me, you're heroes. You're both the best. I'm crying. I can't help it. You guys. It's all so nice to hear, but it's also equally as nice to say. And I do appreciate my life. And you can kind of, I think it's human nature to think that you appreciate it and you've got a handle on, oh man, did I learn my lesson? And then life gets going and you completely forget that lesson. And, and I do that time and time

again, but I'm very thankful that I have a well to go back to and straighten myself out and be like, man, I remember what it was like begging, begging to live through a moment or begging, please, I just want to have a kid, you know, and, and, or, or even just to find a partner and, you know, in those moments, I always say to Stephanie, I'm like, I am crazy about you 99% of the time, but 1% of the time, I cannot stand you. And she's like, same. But I'm, I do, I appreciate my life. But I actually am also at a point in my life where I feel like I need more guidance

to be even more appreciative because there are things that I cannot believe get on my nerves or that I dread doing. And I'm like, what are you talking about? You are the luckiest person alive and you need to get it together. You know what I mean? Like, let's just human nature.

I know it is. But like, I really want to focus more energy on, I guess, gratitude, because I am grateful, but I would like a heavier dose. Yeah. Heavier dose. You're right. It's so nice to say this stuff. And in your regular friendships, it's so rare that you are like, these are all the things I love about you and I'm grateful for. I want

to do this with all my friends. They'll be like, oh, gosh. I'm not stopping you. Yeah, I'm going to do this with all my friends. They'll be like, oh, gosh. I remember when my stepfather, who I think I've talked about how talk about stoic in the way of being, you know, just like a robot. But when my mother passed away, I remember him making a toast. We had like all of her old friends and our old neighbors and my brother and I had our childhood friends over and our families and stuff. And my stepfather was like, this is what she would have wanted when she was alive. And I never did that for her. And I regret it. And it was such a moment where I thought, yeah, like you should write that letter.

You should tell your friend that thing. You should have a surprise party for somebody for no reason. You know what I mean? Like, and just feel like, God, I love you. You know? Yeah, for sure. Those are fun little things to remind yourself to do. Yeah.

And I really felt it when my stepfather was making a toast to my mother, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I'm feeling very grateful at the moment because I don't know if you were wondering where I am, but I'm in my ex-fiance's apartment in Toronto. I had nowhere to record. I'm at my parents' house and I can't try to be funny audibly in the room with that. They'd be listening and being like, well. And so I reached out and she's out of town and she told me where the key was. And it's just, I'm so grateful for it. And it's so

nice to be around objects I remember from when we were together. I love an object and like photographs and yeah, so I'm grateful for that relationship and With Lindsay and yeah, I'm not snooping. I'm not gonna snoop. All right. Are you typically a snooper? All right. Are you typically a snooper? Well, you know, I'm curious. I think that's a yes. I mean, it goes back to your curiosity. It's my innate curiosity.

Yeah, your innate curiosity. Yeah. You do a little peek-a-boo in her drawers, so to speak. Yes, see what's going on with her current relationship. Is she home right now? No, she's up in Prince Edward County. Her and her partner live most of the time up in the countryside. Do you like your partner?

Oh my God, yeah, the best. And this person was at our Toronto show, right? Yes. That's right. Yeah, they both were and Lindsay's partner asked a question at the live show. Yeah. And they're just gems, both of them. Oh, that's nice. It's good that you are friends. Oh my God. Yeah. Oh, look at us. What a moment of sharing. Sharing is caring.

Yes. 100 episodes in. I guess we have done 101 if somebody is going to start crunching numbers, because Thomas did put together one episode that was all of our, what was it, the greatest hits? Yeah, that's so. And then also we did one when we didn't know the format of the podcast yet. We did one with a guest, right? Yeah, we did a couple.

One with Brett Goldstein as a guest? And Otzko. Yeah, one with Otzko. Oh yeah, were they there for the whole time? Do we still have those recorded? Yeah, they're somewhere. Oh, maybe those will get released one day. Then we were like, oh my God,

it's a nightmare just to schedule us. Yeah. If we then add another busy person to this, we will not get anything done. That's correct. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So thank God we pivoted.

And we wanted to hog more of the air time. Yeah. We don't want no guests. Get out of here. We got feelings to share. Yeah. I feel like it works nicely. Yeah, it does. Our show. Yeah. I love all the sharing of I'm I just turned 45. I know it's hard to believe because I wear a lot of creams.

And you'd use your de puffer. I use my de puffer, but it was a time and probably because of what's going on in my life where it just made me very introspective and just thinking about a lot. But I am of the opinion of like you think nice things about people or you appreciate something about someone like definitely tell them And with my mom being sick that definitely hits home even more like you're saying TIG about your stepdad having regrets That's the last thing I want is to be like I wish I'd said something to somebody or Did something differently? I just want to I want to move forward did something differently. I just want to move forward deliberately and not so out to lunch. You know, there's been times where I've just worked so much where I've just been a little

out to lunch and I don't want that. I want to be very present and tell people in my life things that are important and meaningful and not shy away from stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you, in the past, have had a tendency to just keep that stuff private? I just went through a period of time where I was just working so much. I just wasn't, just this like, I don't know why, I just was like, threw myself into that And this was kind of coasting a bit where I wasn't, I wasn't, you know, connecting with friends like I should. And just wasn't taking the time to, to appreciate some of the smaller things in life.

And like sitting on a bench, like sitting on a bench. I wasn't sitting on benches. Yeah. And I just want to be more cognizant of, I don't want to be a robot. I don't want to be just like, next show, next show. I got to write this. I got to do this. I don't want that.

I think I told you and I've probably mentioned it on the podcast, but I just realized I was gone filming, I was touring and I was just like, yeah, I'm working, making money, sending it home, but it's like, I wanna be home with my family doing the activities that they're doing. I wanna be, I wanna go play tennis. Yeah, I wanna go, yeah, I wanna go, I wanna be there at the baseball game.

I wanna be everywhere with them. And I came up with like a schedule of all, you know, podcasting, Star Trek and touring that is really scaled down, that keeps me working, but keeps me mostly in my life. And it's, I'm so proud of it. I can't even tell you, I'm so proud to have those things in motion and but not ruling my life.

Yeah, I feel like I'm still in my like, hustler era, like I still have this scarcity mentality of saying yes to things, but I'm getting better at it. And and I'm also I'm like I in my last relationship, I was like, immediately was like, Oh, no, I'm happy to just cancel everything and sit in this house. So I know that I have that in me too. So yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, but yeah. People used to ask like, oh, what's your work life balance? How do you do that? I'd be like, yeah, you know, I'm trying to do this. I'm trying to, and then I realized like, I am lying. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I'm not, it wasn't that I was like purposefully lying. It was that I was lying to myself. I had made no conscious decisions to shift my life in any way. It wasn't like I was never home

because I would certainly have the ability to stay home for weeks or months at a time. But I just wasn't really, really making the decisions that would get the work-life balance in order. Anyway, I'm just so excited. I can't even tell you. That's awesome. Yeah. I'm really, really happy about it. Imagine if this was the first episode of the pod someone listened to. I'd be like, okay. They're really emote. They really feel deep.

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Should we, should we bring her back on on the hundredth episode? Because she really kicked us off in a solid direction. A huge way. I mean, that episode is so ridiculous. It's insane. It's so great. And it's just so perfect. Yeah. Because we do love getting ridiculous questions and earnest ones. But and Sarah, man, she can, she walks that line really well. Yes, she does. Have you seen her new specials? Amazing. Oh, it's so good.

Yes, yep. She is nothing but silly and nothing but like, she's so smart. She's just- I like seeing her out and about in the comedy world too. It's like you see her and you just like start smiling. Always the best, yeah. Yeah.

Well, let's hear Sarah Silverman once again asking today's question for the 100th episode. Hey, handsome, it's me. It's Sarah Silverman. I just wanted to say congratulations on your first 100 EPs. That's short for episodes. I'm cool.

Also, I have another question. And my question is why? Why? Wow. That could apply to so many things. But I really relate to that feeling that like, I mean, why, oh, why are we here? Why? Why are we? What is this? What's happening? Stephanie told me that the other day, Finn goes,

I'm so sick of not knowing things. And he was like, what do you mean? He was like, why are we here? Why is there a sun? Oh my God. Why is there, I just wanna know. Oh my God. I felt that panic my whole childhood and teens.

And like, I really, I mean, was it, was it Finn who wrote that song? No, that was Max. There was no one knows, we don't know why the world was born. We don't know why we were born. Yeah. How does the world work?

We don't know how the world works. It was the sun rises West, the sun goes down East, which is profound. And then we don't know how the world works. Yeah. Oh man. But no, I really relate to that. I mean, I know it's bad because it uses water, but I talked to chat GPT quite a bit and I often ask it like, what the hell's going on? And like, are we in a simulation? Are we, what's going on? Do you want wanna hear what chat, well, I just Googled, why is the world the way it is?

You wanna hear what it says? Well, yeah, but you're destroying the world a little bit by asking, but go on. I know, well, that's part of this duality we live in. Yes. Like, how do we live in the world and participate in it when it's such a mess and all the systems are so damaging? Okay, so it says, the world is the way it is

due to a combination of natural processes, human actions, and the inherent nature of reality. From the formation of the earth and the laws of physics to the development of cultures and individual choices, a complex interplay of factors shapes our world. That's, I mean. Did that satiate your question? No!

Yeah, it just seems like a lot of this nonsense. It sounds like a robot answered you. Yeah, sure. To be honest. 100%. Yeah. Yeah, and then it, I don't know, you can put on different lenses and see the world in different ways.

And at the moment, it really feels overwhelmingly negative, like world-wise, our capacity for cruelty. We don't know how the world works. We don't know why we were born. You know what my mom said though? We don't know if we were born. That was my favorite line. We don't know if we were born. That was my favorite line. We don't know if we were born. Yes. Because yeah, we don't really have any evidence outside of our own minds that any, like when

you close your eyes, everything could not be there. But my mom one time, because I was like, God, it's just, there's so much suffering. You're just born, you're immediately suffering. And my mom was like, but we don't know what the alternative is. Like being is better than not being as far as we know. And I was like, that's true. I guess I'd rather be than not be.

But yeah. That's a good point. Yeah. I don't dig too deep into all these kind of questions. You don't? No. Why? Cause you know it would drive you nuts.

I just, some things can't? No. Why? Because you know it would drive you nuts? I just, some things can't be answered. So I don't drive myself crazy trying to figure it out. Right. And maybe that's a little, you know, turning a blind, not to big important things, but just these like more philosophical questions. Right. I don't dig too deep into that. Right. Yeah, you got to let those questions sit loosely on your shoulders. Because really, you got to get up and have breakfast and have a shower and live your life. When I was a kid, and I've probably mentioned this before, but I used to really, really think that if I grabbed a pack of smokes, headed off into the woods and sat on like a little rock, like a, you know, boulder, I

could really figure out the answer to. Yeah, like Siddhartha, like the Buddhist, he sat under the lotus tree and yeah. I really thought I was going to come up with like the answer to how the lotus tree and yeah. I really thought I was gonna come up with like the answer to how the world works and why we're here and what this is all about, but I never did unfortunately. But I have to say one of my big whys that's going on for me right now is,

and I guess the answer to my big why it would be going directly to specific people and sitting down and asking them why but I've had a handful of friends that have really veered off from what I thought was similar thinking, socially, politically, and they've really veered off. And I think part of my why is also why didn't you just share that you were heading off in a different direction. Like why, cause everybody is kind of left wondering why, what happened? Like what, why? It goes back to the why.

And it could be a different feeling if somebody was like, hey, this is kind of weird, but I didn't feel this way before. And here's what's, something in me has really shifted. And not that I'd be all for that, but it would be more understandable. You know? You would think that they,

if their convictions had really changed and you're their friend, you'd think that they would come to you. That they'd want to share that. And they'd say, hey, I think you got it wrong and come with me, like,. They don't ever do that. Do you think they're aware that they've shifted so much? Yes, they do.

Yes, they do. I was, I was in in Nantucket. I was having my brunch, like at the hotel restaurant or whatever and it was just one other table next to me. And I didn't have my phone with me or anything, so I was just listening to their conversations. And it was like a cartoon of like, they went through everything from like, trans people are bad, like, you know, women are dumb, like every immigration, like they went through everything.

They were just, they were getting revved up. It was this, like three couples, sort of older couples. And they were, but I was like, what's going on here? Because they were really enjoying, they were fueling each other and they were, but they were really connecting over it and being like, God, it's hard. It's so hard. They were like, they, them, like, it doesn't make sense. I've got, it's just, it's hard. It's just hard. And they were like, and I was like, where is this coming from? Cause I could feel their like panic or fear.

And I get wild. Cause it's on like, in what way does that affect them at all? Completely. Yeah. And they always, and you can always hear them be like, oh yeah, it doesn't make sense. You know, if someone called me, they tell them where they could stick it.

And it's like, you just did it. You just said that. But then, yeah, I felt like that they were finding community over it too. And so I guess it is just like these things come in waves and cycles and like the sense, maybe it's the same existential fear that we're all feeling and that there's people's solution is just to build up their walls and

grab what's theirs and you know what I mean? Yeah, I mean because it is true. It's like if I had a major shift in the way I was going about my life, and of course people have shifts and you change the way you're thinking and you change, I mean even down to comedy. Like look at Sarah Silverman. I mean, her material has shifted so much over the years, you know, where she's even had moments of saying like,

oh, hey, this didn't age well, and but she's keeping you in conversation. Like, oh, I've learned this, I've changed, I've gone in this direction, or oh, I've learned this, I've changed, I've gone in this direction or oh, I said this the wrong way or I apologize or I do it better now or I'm, you know, like she, she really keeps you in conversation. Yeah. And then there are, like I said, if I made a massive shift and did not fill in anybody

on where this came from. And I just went with it so far away from where I was planted with the people I was growing with, you know? And again, it's like, it's okay to change and it's okay to say that you have different ideas, but just like, why? Where, what? Give us some more information.

Stay in conversation. I know, because the fact that it, like Sarah's series, I Love You America, she was really talking to people and it's like, I know the work shouldn't fall on us to always build bridges. But often when you do engage in conversations with people whose thoughts on human rights and things are so different from your own. They do come around. They haven't. But then there are, like I'm saying, people that you thought were on that side of things,

and then you see them drifting away. They're not staying in conversation. I would want to explain myself. If I was seeing the light, I thought, that was so different from the world I was in. I guess I can compare it to veganism if you want like a comparison. It's like, I saw the light. You can think I'm weird.

You can not follow what I'm doing, but I'm gonna talk you through how I got here i know it's very different but i'm just i'm saying that. People make massive shifts and just but just explain what what happened like what yeah where is this coming from and what sent you in that direction yeah cuz the fact that they are. The people are reluctant to do that makes it seem like there is some awareness somewhere or shame about it. Shame, yes. Yeah, that they are aware that they are punching down or, you know. Yes, if you slither away quietly, Yes, if you slither away quietly, there is shame. There is shame. There is shame.

There is shame. If you are slithering away, there is shame. It's the same like when people break up and they can't talk to you about it or like they or if you've ever been ghosted or broken up with where it's just like this isn't working. Often they can't talk about it because they know. where it's just like this isn't working. It's often they they can't talk about it because they know. Yeah I had an experience with somebody recently where there was some weirdness in the air and I was like I'm gonna go up and just say hey. There's some stuff going on obviously. Would love to talk to you about it. And she was kind of defensive and weird.

And, and we were in this like group situation. And she avoided me the rest of the time. And I thought, if somebody came up to me and said, I'd like to talk to you, I would follow back up with that. I would be like, Hey, so what is it that's going on? You know, what was that? I would not slither away. I think not everybody's capable of that emotional level of communication. Yeah, I walked away from that going, man, like why on earth would you slither away and avoid me

if there wasn't any shame in there? And I guess part of it, like, I think I take responsibility too for sometimes the, you have to make an, which I think you do take, but in general, like we have to make it an environment where it's safe to ask questions and safe for people to express themselves, you know, and not feel like they're going to immediately get called, you know, a bigot because they don't understand they them, you know, like we got to. Well, yeah, and this, you mean like giving people grace? Yeah, totally. Oh my God. Yeah. Like in this particular conversation, I truly went out,

we were like kind of giving each other awkward smiles, like hi, because there was obviously something to discuss. And then that's when I was like, hey, so I'd love to talk to you about the, you know. Elephant in the room. Yeah, and slither, slither, slither. So anyway, that all goes back to why? Why?

Why? Stop slithering. There's been a lot of why's I think since COVID times. So much, I was thinking about that today, just like this pre and post COVID world, things just so significantly shifted. Yeah. They really did.

And it would have been nice if it was a moment where that would have unified us as human beings. And it does feel like people just went to their little caves and went online and got radicalized a little bit sometimes. Got into podcasts. Yeah. Just started taking in podcasts and stopped talking to people.

But keep on doing that. Keep supporting the show. Yeah. Glad you listen. And Sarah does not have a follow-up answer when I asked her. No, I was hoping she'd solve this for us. She doesn't have any answers for us. She said that it's just, it's like,

it's an open-ended why, it's for everything and anything, which I think is perfect, that works. Very timely. And I will say, I really admire that about Sarah, her fluidity in terms of her, yeah, and transparency about her journey as a person. I hope I do that. Yeah, I just think we should all aspire to just,

as we get older, because no doubt, younger generations, there are gonna be things that I do not understand, or that I immediately feel defensive about. There's all kinds of things, probably now. And yeah, we gotta keep talking to young people, and keep learning, and talking to young people and keep learning and talking to people and yeah.

Yeah. And we gotta keep being silly at times too. Oh, for fuck's sake, that's all we have. And have some levity. Yeah. We're gonna have a lot of whys and a lot of, ugh, and a lot of frustrations and keeping it, you know, obviously these things are important and you got to take them seriously but also taking time to let the air out of the tires for a minute.

Oh my gosh, one million percent. People are, I hear from people all the time how thankful they are for just like a break from the insanity of life and the silliness and the singing and the Fortune Marie and the Mayfax and all of it. It's like, you know, there's obviously plenty of news stations you can go and drain your energy into, but like we'll touch on things from time to time, but in general, you know, this is, this is a nice place for us to go. This is where you hear about me, a pineapple apart. That's right. I really, for my own brand, really appreciate it. Swell of little cowboys.

Yeah, ghosts. Yeah, ghosts. Ponties, galore, checking out those gams. Motorboating. Motorboating, my friends. Cooters. Cooters galore., my friends. Cooders. Cooders galore. Cooders and hooters.

Cooders and hooters and pooters. You need to start your own, or maybe we could as a trio, start Cooders and Hooters. Cooders and hooters. Put it on the list. Well, yeah, put that on the list. That list that we haven't whittled down. We will get to it. We will get to it in our retirement.

You know what? I was watching a documentary about the Beach Boys with my friends, and I was like, oh, I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy.

I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy. I'm going to be a beach boy.led down. We will get to it. We will get to it in our retirement. You know what? I was watching a documentary about the Beach Boys with my mom last night, and my mom goes, God, their harmonies are amazing. And then out of nowhere, she doesn't listen to the pod, I don't know where she goes, you know, you and Tig and Fortune should do harmonies, like do a do like a barbershop quartet. And I went, have you heard our theme song? And she was like, no. So I went on YouTube and I played the theme song and she was like, wow. So that's one thing we've checked off the list.

Yeah. Well, we could be a, what's, what's a three person? Triad. A triad. All right. Triathlon. Triathlon. That's a long term. The frouple. Yeah. Triathlon. Triathlon. That's a long term. The fruple. Is it triathlon?

Triathlon, yeah, yeah. That's like if you really, on your deathbed, you're holding hands with two people. You did a triathlon. Yeah. All right, well that was a really special episode. Yeah. So full of emotion, so introspective,

lots of philosophical wanderings. And a lot of why? Why? Why this day in conversation? Yeah. So was our 100 episodes. Congratulations, you guys. Yeah, congrats. And thank you, Mr. Thomas, for staring the ship. Yeah. And thank you for everyone that's listening to this.

Awesome pod, cause we get as much joy doing it as you guys have told us you get from listening to it. And thank you guys for me, it's a privilege to produce this show and I feel like this, you know, the podcast spreads so much joy and to participate in that is really meaningful for me. So thank you all.

So why do we do this podcast? Oh, to spread joy. Yeah, I think joy. Yeah, yeah. Well, speaking of spreading handsome joy, I'm gonna tell you where I'm spreading my handsome joy, if you don't mind. Please.

West Hampton Beach Performing Arts Center in West Hampton Beach, New York, August 17th. Provincetown Town Hall in P-Town, Massachusetts, August 23rd, Beau Rivage Resort and Casino, Biloxi, Mississippi, September 27th. Also go to tignotaro.com to see when I'm working out my new material at Largo, Dynasty Typewriter, and Comedy Bar, bouncing back and forth

between Toronto and Los Angeles. What do you have going on, my friends? I got nothing live for a little while. So yeah, you can listen to my music or I'm gearing up to launch something very cool. I'll probably talk about it a bunch more, but I'm gonna launch like, I do these animal paintings.

I'm launching an online store, selling the animal paintings and 100% of the proceeds go to charity and I'm excited about that. That'll be launching in the next week or two, I think. So stay tuned. That's cause you can't stop expressing yourself. I can't, I just can't stop.

Can't stop, won't stop, don't stop. Can stop, won't stop. Can stop, won't stop, yeah. What about you, Fortune? I'm going to Iceland soon, August 8th in Reykjavik. I'm doing a show there for their Pride. So if you live in Iceland, check that out. And then San Antonio and Houston,

Norfolk and Richmond and DC, Burlington, Vermont, Atlanta, Cincinnati, Chicago, Salt Lake City, fortunepinscher.com for those tickets. Well, there you have it. Please, Well, there you have it. Please, should we say share this episode? Maybe not this one, as the first episode that you share with us. Share your favorite. Start with Sarah Silverman's first episode with us. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Where she asks about cleaning undercarriages. Yes, that's right. Solid episode. There's so many great ones.

Share one with a friend or family member and bring them on into the handsome fold. And keep chatting to each other on the Facebook page, the Reddit page. Keep sending us questions for the pretty little episodes. And we love to hear from you. Get your merch. Look at this fun, handsome shirt right here. You can see that on YouTube. Merch in the biz.

Head on over to YouTube and see handsome fortune face in a handsome t-shirt. Well, you guys are awesome. What a joy and treat to do this with you. Ditto. Yes, it is. Kisses. Mm.

Mm. Happy 100th. You both look under 50. Happy 100. All righty. Well. Until the next time. Keep it handsome. Keep it handsome. Happy 100. All righty. Well, until the next time. Keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, May Martin, Tignotaro and Fortune Feimster.

The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsome pod. What a podcast. What a podcast. What a podcast. What a podcast. That was a hate gun podcast. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First.

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