Handsome - Will Arnett asks about living in a TV show

Episode Date: January 6, 2026

Will Arnett takes a quick break from SmartLess to ask the Handsome hosts a question about their favorite sitcoms! Plus a round of "Row, Row Your Boat," a Golden Girls detour, and Fortune getting a little touchy-feely with Tig. Did we mention we have a new FORTUNE MARIE shirt at handsomepod.com? Cheers!Handsome is hosted by Tig Notaro, Mae Martin, and Fortune FeimsterFollow us on social media @handsomepodMerch at handsomepod.comWatch Handsome on YouTubeThis is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Handsome via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Cheers Welcome to the Handsom Pod It's your friend Tignotaro And I'm Fortune Feeveser And I'm May Martin if you believe it I can't believe it I believe it Don't stop

Believing You know there's a line in that song Yeah In the beginning where it says Something about South Detroit Born and raised in South Detroit Yeah There's no part of Detroit called South Detroit.

Really? But South is a universal direction, no? For sure. But there's no area of Detroit called South Detroit. Called South Detroit. That's a little rock and roll trivia for you. Okay. Does that keep you up in night?

No, I sleep fine knowing. Yeah. How are you guys sleeping these days? And how are you? Welcome back to the New Year, New Handsome. I know. Oh, 2026 is upon us. And we're together.

Mm-hmm. We are together, feet touching. Portsch and get your other foot in there. Oh, there we are. There we go. We did that as though that is our thing that we do. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Quick six-toed touch. I love the beginning of the year. Do you? I do. I just feel hopeful every time. Yeah. We're like, this year we're going to get it right. Yeah.

And you never have, to be fair. No, never have. And we never have as a species. Well, I will say in comparison to the beginning of last year, this is much better. Like you're more settled. Last year, everything was up in the air. This year, at least you know. This time last year was a nightmare. Yeah. Yeah. So now I feel much more grounded. You made it through hell. Yeah. And I know there's still tough days ahead. Yeah. Yeah. But my God, do I give you ongoing credit for the hell you dug through? Oh, thanks, my friend. Truly.

And really, so many people, like, when I do shows and stuff, people probably tell you, like, if they're going through hard stuff and then they listen to the pod and they're, like, your resilience is very inspiring fortune. Oh, that's sweet. Good night, everyone. Good night. Oh, are you going to sleep? Yeah, good night. But we were just talking about, you know, about, well, you were just saying, have you been sleeping? And I thought you were, like, saying good night, like you were going to lie down.

Have you been sleeping while? Yeah. I think I've been sleeping fine. I have been waking up earlier than I used to in general. Yeah. Like how much earlier? Like I used to be a person that slept till like 9, 930 super easily. And now I'm averaging around 7, 7.30.

Wow. Do you like that? I don't mind it. Are you going to bed earlier? I'm trying to, yeah. Although I did stay up and I got sucked into a show that has been capturing the hearts. of girls and gays everywhere. Is it the hockey gay one?

It is indeed, my friend. I need to watch it. It is called heated rivalry. And it is on HBO. Yeah. And it's got all the gays and all the girls in a chokehold. Because it's hot. It's hot.

Gay hockey players. Gay hot. Having hot gay sex. But they're also having like hot sex and also loving sex. Yeah. And also I know I'm going to watch it because everyone's talking about the sex. I know I'm going to watch it. going to be like half as much sex as a straight show, but people just talk about it way more.

Well, I think it's just like, it's just different than any portrayal of it that you've seen in media. Oh, I'm excited. There's a hotness to it and some, sometimes then there's a tenderness to it and other times in a way that they don't depict males often. And girls are really into it. Wait, oh, it's gay guys? Gay guys, yeah.

Interesting. And they're closeted hockey players that are like meeting up. and banging and it's got the word it was gay women no it's men and it's got the world but called the world by storm but you know how like the the cliches that like straight men watch lesbian porn yeah i do watch gay male like i'm i think a lot of people like a lot of um non men yeah non men watch gay male porn yeah yeah yeah because it's hot because yeah yeah fortune do you watch gay male I don't, but I'm really into this series. But back to porn, do you watch a lot of porn?

No. Did you watch a little bit of porn? No, I haven't watched it in so long. Back at the day. How long? Are we talking weeks? No, like years. I haven't watched it. Did you ever watch the original queer as folk?

Oh, yeah. That was hot. That was good. Yeah. I would say, yeah, this show is like, these men are very attractive. And you were binging this and you didn't sleep. And I stayed up later than I should because I was like, well, I can't quit now. I got to see what happens in episode five.

Right. And what happened in episode five? It really leaves on a cliffhanger of, well, I don't want to give it away because I feel like people. I'm going to watch it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, I'm not going to give it away. Can you just tell me then? No. You need to, you should watch it too.

I think y'all would be into it. Okay. How are you feeling about the start of the year? I'm feeling really good. I am yeah do you want hold hands I'm happy to hold hands do you want to hold hands yeah I'm feeling good about the new year

you're the horse I'm getting a horse you're getting horse you're getting a horse and you get a horse and you get a horse no it's the year of the horse oh I said you're getting a horse

you're getting horse you're getting a horse yeah no I'm uh I feel like I've teed life up where I want it yes at 54 it's so crazy how long it takes humans to evolve yeah you're and change yeah and and and and i i do feel like this year everything feels pretty much in place and i'm ready to

live life with things in place yeah carly karl young said life begins at 40 everything up until then is just research oh my for sure i'm really holding on to that i'm like yeah I feel like lighter. I feel good. I went to Toronto and like I was so many friends going through tough stuff and it gave me perspective. And then I also, I was at like a wake and one of the grieving husband of the person who had passed after I left the wake apparently said to my friend, so nice to see May, I hope they figure out the riddle of their life. Oh. She passed this on to me.

And I was like, am I giving, am I giving off? I haven't figured out the riddle of my life. But I loved it. It's haunted me and it's made me think, yeah, I got to figure out the riddle of my life. I would be very excited by that. And I would say, it's a great way to look at it. Like, we all have a riddle of our life. And that's our mission is to solve that riddle.

And the joy is trying to solve it. Like, we might not. I would say the complicated and exciting part of you is that your life definitely feels like a riddle. A griddle. But really, like, you know, there's so many people where I just feel like you have had and will continue. It's a very full life. There's a curiosity and a change. And you're a very curious person. Very. And I like a mystery. I like an escape room. So I like approaching it that way, being like, yeah. So I came back feeling good. And then I volunteered at this. And everyone, if you're going to. LA food on foot it's called yeah and it's you can go every Sunday if you want it's like handing out food to unhoused people and I was just like fucking hell because I've been feeling so paralyzed by how bad the news is and we're just you feel like hopeless but really if you do things in your

immediate community like if everyone did that yeah the massive change would be crazy and I felt like oh it's I can do something I'm not yeah because imagine like we're all reading the news about like anti-trans laws and all this stuff but if everyone in their small town like supported their local LGBT center called their representatives whatever in your immediate vicinity it would make a huge difference

that's my little spiel I'm feeling very positive and and so you um it was that your first experience with food on foot yes and there's not actual food on your feet there's no food on my feet right and uh I went with my friend Matt who I

who lives with me sure he lives and you're he's free range he lives in your backyard someone that wanders by your window occasionally yeah exactly yeah and it was just amazing that they it's food and clothes and stuff and you you hand it out and 400 people showed up to I mean to make use of it yeah and I kind of thought it would be one of those things where it was like super privileged people just like getting a selfie of them volunteering but it was like which is always helpful which is always helpful I mean I did take a selfie let's not you're like I got to get credit for this but like they are really in need of volunteers like they really like are in need every Sunday and then they also have a program that helps people get housing gets training

get sober gets yeah it's like they they stay with these people and while we were there this woman graduated and got the keys to her first ever apartment she's in her 40s so cool it was like oh my god so it may yeah like you can't not leave feeling grateful and positive and yeah And as a reminder, too, I've told you guys about that place where we deliver food every Sunday. What is that? It's called Hangout Do Good. Okay. And it's different houses around Los Angeles that are every Sunday, rain or shine, you pull up, you drop off prepared food.

Prepared, okay. Yeah, like sandwiches, snacks, all sorts of things. In a bag, you put it on the people's yard or front step. And the people that have, you know, made their home the drop-off, they take all of the food and go deliver it. Yeah. And it's just, you know, if you don't have a huge amount of time. Yeah. And, you know, we're busy on the weekends with our kids, but we get up every Sunday, put the meals together and we go drop it off.

That's so good. And you can, you know, they have it online, tell you the nearest one. Yeah, that's amazing. So anyway, it's, even aside from. holiday time just like if you have to remember these people are in need all year round yeah I'm gonna keep going and then like this unhoused person is walking past my table and goes you're did you forget something today and I said what do you mean and he goes did you forget how beautiful you are oh that's a good one my god my heart like that's a good line thank you

yeah I'm gonna use that one did you forget something did you forget something did you forget something Do you forget how beautiful you were? It was really charming. My goodness. And what did you say to that? I honestly was like, well, thank you. I did not forget anything.

I said, yeah, I did forget. What if you were like, actually I didn't? No, I always remember that. That's one thing I never forget. Yeah. Well, that's great. Yeah. I love that.

It was good, man. I love you too. Oh, I have a gift from a handsome listener. girl girl show it to us it's I don't know if give me mine this is for TIG

because it has your name on it and there's it says cat lady and this is May question mark I don't know why this has a question mark question mark and then there's a letter here sometimes when we do live shows someone will hand me something for all of you

oh it's soap so this says a fortune TIG of May wishing you the most wonderful Christmas and the happiest new year I haven't seen you guys to give you this earlier Thank you for being amazing Cheers Jillian

This lovely woman in Florida in Orlando Also had sent my mom A bunch of candles that she makes Oh no way And then my sister-in-up ordering a bunch of them Because she liked them so much But I guess she also makes soap

That's amazing This smells amazing And is she cat lady or is that I don't know Please don't touch mine No her thing is Jillian says Dot com

I think she just did Cat Lady for you Okay, yeah, that's me I will say this has coconut oil in it So I cannot use it But I was, I have a date tomorrow Do you think I should give? No, that would be weird No, I can't give a bar

I said. Oh, I have another one That I'll take that one And when I see you later I can exchange you She hasn't given us. Well, no, she gave me two She gave me one for me You being greedy

She gave me one for me But it might not have coconut oil in it I bet they all do. It smells so good, though. Can I give it to someone? I'm going to say yes. Yeah, I'm not going to give it to someone on a first date. Yeah, don't take a personal.

Here's a bar of soap. Yeah, no. You can give it on the last date. Yeah, yeah, which might be the first. Yeah, right. Same day. Yeah. I don't think I realized that the coconut, I felt with you and coconut, it was only ingesting it.

Well, your body is ingesting it, right? We don't know when it's on your skin. Yeah, but I had a no, like, seep in like that. Well, I had a massage with coconut oil, and afterwards I just felt really, like, red and itchy and, like, woozy. But it could be in my head. We don't know. I've never been tested for this allergy. That's true.

Well, I think that would make a lovely gift to someone, though. Yeah, it would. But don't say I didn't ever bring you back handsome presents. I will never say that again. I will. Today, we'll say it. I'll keep saying. I always try to bring y'all stuff back if someone gives it to me, but let's not go crazy.

I only have so much room in my bag, people. Yeah. So let's not, let's not do that. every time. Handsome is brought to you by Shipped. With Shipped same-day delivery, I never worry about how I'm going to get my shopping done for a few reasons. Shipped gives you same-day delivery on everything you need, groceries, decor, gifts,

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Yeah, yeah, you were going to. You bailed back down. I was like, I told my agent, I was like, you know what? I will do mean greet this year. And then when I started thinking about, I was like, I don't know. It is like, because it'll, it does add like two hours to, you do your hour and a half show. Well, it shouldn't be two hours. You're doing.

Oh, you're doing too much. I think you're doing too much. I think I'm spending too much time with each person. It should not be two hours for sure. I'm excited to go to all these cities I've ever been to. I know. You get your big. tour that's, when does that start?

End of February. Ooh. I'm scared though about like, I just saw in Texas they're making this rule that you're allowed to take pictures of people you suspect are trans in the bathroom. Oh, really? And then upload them to a helpline. What? Reporting it.

And then they're offering cash prizes to people who turn in. Prizes. Cash incentives. If you report on like someone who is propagating trans ideology. Like it's getting really. Gosh. Not to be a downer, but it is nerve rat. I guess I'll just pee on the bus.

That is nerve wracking. I'll pee on my tour bus. Or where in Texas are you going? And I'll send selfies to the helpline. Yeah. Where in Texas will you be? I'm going to doubt the big city. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like I don't want to cancel because what's nice is that maybe people in those small towns will come to. For sure. You should definitely drive in. Do it. Yeah. Weird times though.

Yes. Yes. Indeed. Yeah. Why do you live here? I don't know. I mean. I truly, I just look at people that have the option to not.

Right. Oh, I see. Yeah. You were thinking about Toronto for a while, right? You guys? Yeah, it's not off the table. Yeah. I would miss you too much.

Well, we're bringing you with us. If they go, I'm going in a little side car. Yeah, wagon attached to your car. Yeah. That seems safe. And then you get in a wagon attached to mine. Like a little red wagon that we would pull behind the car. Oh, that's cute.

What's that from? A wood wed wagon. A wood a wood wagon. Is that Fred Willard, I think? I got a wheel wed wag Oh like on best in show or something Probably Oh man

Oh my gosh Oh my god Oh my goodness you guys And wait I feel like you went and saw Somebody that told you Oh the psychic Uh huh

Yeah I I Okay I'll say What will I say I had an experience with the psychic That was so crazy that I'm Keeping it I just told you

Before we started recording But maybe I won't say it on the pod Because I think people think I'm insane on this podcast For sure Yeah they think I'm fucking That's why they tune in No they're just That you just like some woo-woo stuff

They know that they're following you With your riddle of life Yes exactly And this is just part of it Part of the riddle Yeah Good point Tate Thank you

You're welcome Because I'm also like I'm also interested in What does this mean sociologically The way We A lot of people especially Gen Z are turning to things like magic

and manifestation and spells like... Oh, really? I didn't know that. And it's a very individualistic, inward-looking thing. I'm sorry, yeah. You can't just casually say Gen X is turning to magic. Gen Z. Gen Z. They're like got a coin.

Like higher. Because like up close up, magic with top hats. But I have to say, I did a show at Largo last night. Yeah. And it was crazy when I interacted with somebody in the audience. Yeah. He was a magician.

And then another magician was there. No, no. He was like, hey, Brent, is that you? Yeah, it's like. No way. And I was, when I was on stage, I was like, okay, it's so dark in this theater. I would have assumed it's just a sea of lesbians. Right.

But it's white, middle. age, balding, magicians. I didn't know that was my sweet spot. How is that your demographic? I don't know. I mean, everyone is welcome at my show. I was just like, look at this. Also, I have to just say this, because I, you know when you miss a moment? Yeah. And you're like, I want to go back in time. Yeah. One of the go-goes was at my show last one. Oh, really? That's big, that's like your people. How do I know? Yes. Okay. How do I know? I was talking to. to her. Oh, there you go. And so I was worried you didn't meet her. Well, she, I do this thing where I'll, I'll talk to the audience and ask them, like, if they know anyone famous. Oh, really? And this

woman. That's so funny. Wait, so you just say, does anyone here know anyone famous? Yeah. And it's just such a fun, it's so fun to follow. Well, especially in LA, there's the likelihood is high. So I'm talking to her and she says, I know Belinda Carlisle. And I was like, and it's like, and And it's so dark, okay? She's second row, and I'm like, how do you know Bullenac Carlisle? Yeah. And she's like, well, I've been in a band with her for over 40 years. I was like, wait, you're a go-go?

That's hilarious. And she's like, yeah, and I go, what's your name? And she said, Charlotte. And then I was like, oh, my gosh. And then I wanted to say her last name. Yeah. But I was scared that I was remembering it wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And that I was going to be saying, I thought it was a girl's name from my childhood. Yeah. And that was the moment I missed because I wanted to blow her mind. And as soon as we got in the car to leave, I looked up her last name and I turned to Stephanie. I was like, I had it right. And I just wanted to.

And Stephanie was like, you should look her up online and tell her. And I go, I miss a moment. Yeah. But if she's listening, which she claims, she goes, I am a huge fan of yours. If you are listening, Charlotte. TIG new. I knew.

What is it? Caffy. Charlotte Caffy. Yes. Yeah, nice. But I was convinced I was like, I'm pulling up my childhood friend's name. Anyway. But that was just a thrill.

And I got to tell her that when Max and Finn were babies, we used to put them in these little bouncy chairs. And they would bounce to We Got the Beat. And we have videos of them just like bouncing and kicking their little feet. That's good. And when I told her that, she was like, oh, we did. She was so happy. I love that. That's a great siding for you.

Yeah. It was really, really fun. Yeah. It's right in your wheelhouse, right in your niche. Oh, my God, the guitarist of the go-goes sitting right there. Sweet spot. I mean less magicians and more like, like spells. Like people are getting into tarot.

They're getting into like, yeah, esoteric kind of like quantum stuff. Yeah. Like that's where we're drifting. And I am interested in that. And I don't think it's a bad thing, but I also don't think it's necessarily a good thing because it's very solipsistic. It's like, it's very like I'm in control. I can manifest my destiny, me, me, me, you know, and we're, anyway, what was my point?

Oh, I went to see a psychic. Oh, there you go. But I'm scared of talking about it in case people think I'm crazy. But I would ignore to psychics a lot. Yeah. Okay. At least in L.A. Because I saw this woman about a year and a half ago or longer now when I was still.

in a relationship and I was like yeah I'm everything's great next year I'm really gonna be like nesting and she was like I don't know about that but oh really I was kind of like fuck you but I remember this was a different psychic no same one same one okay so I remembered I was like oh she was pretty on point and she said some other stuff and so I went back and you were just like don't say I'm not nesting next year I'm gonna nest so hard yeah you're wrong man that was my vibe I was like yeah okay really this psychic is not good yeah and then so i went to see her in toronto and um yeah i was just did you have to confess she was right that you're not nesting yeah i was like hey i have some news yeah then

i she said look into so she's saying all kinds of stuff and i'm crying it's just like therapy right cathartic it's cathartic i'm talking about life and and by the way you sound crazy right now i know no no go ahead She is messing with you. And then she goes, look into my left eye and I look into her eye. Okay, all I'm going to say is I start tripping out. Like, I see her face change. And I've never had, I've never had an experience like this when I'm not on psychedelics. Like her face sort of went, became an old woman's face.

This is broad daylight. Like how old like 54? We're talking. Like around my. 90s like she suddenly looked like you like almost like mother Teresa like me she had word she had a droopy I like your face yeah and then anyway it it it was yeah and then it was what I was just seeing her face changed into different faces and was that helpful for your life I started laughing I was going what is happening and she goes I know I know she goes if you wanted to stop you

You can just look away. She knew her face was melting off. Yes. She knew. She was like, I know, I know. It's weird at first, but my face is going to melt off. You either enjoy the ride or get off. Don't freak out. I'm going to look 54 in a second. And then afterwards, she kind of, I said, what the fuck was that?

Like, what were those faces? And she goes, I don't, she's like, I don't really know. She goes, I just want to, I've always been able to do that. And I just wanted to show you that reality is not what we think it is. There's a lot more going on. Give me her number. I'm going to see if you are lying to us. You have to go in person in Toronto.

I work in Toronto. Okay. I'm going to give you a detail. Give me her number. I won't be there for a minute. Okay. It was wild, guys. But I told my parents they were like, you need to go back to rehab.

No, just kidding. But they were, they were, people are freaked out. And I'm freaked out. Just by the state of the world, you mean? No, by the fact that I saw a woman's face more. Why can we not follow? a conversation. I don't know.

Are you saying the go-goes freak you out? Is that what you're saying? But did you come away with it feeling enlightened? I've just felt more relaxed because I was like... Because her face was melting off. I kind of was like, oh, who cares about anything? There's like old lady faces floating around, you know? And then I thought about the song row, row your boat.

You've heard of it. Life is but a dream. you know, row your boat gently down the stream. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, yeah, barely, barely. I just feel like I'm less worried about things. It'll fade.

Don't worry. Next week I'll be heartbroken. So you left after her face melted off and you were singing row row your boat. And I'm worried people are going to think I'm crazy. They will not. No, no. I think that people can clock that.

People who understand what you're saying. Look, I'm also very grounded, both feet on the floor. Actually, one of your feet's on the floor. on the couch right now. I'm gripping one of my feet like this. Well, anyways. Listen, whatever, you know, whatever, whatever floats your boat, whatever road, whatever.

You can row, row, row your boat. Your turn. Yeah, let's do it around. Okay, ready? Row, row, row your boat. Ro, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. Perry, Maryle. Okay, you start.

And just sing it all the way through. Okay, ready? Row, row, row your boat. Marely, maryly, mary. You can stop this stop. No, because you have to go gently down the stream. Okay. Rrow, row, row your boat.

Gently down the stream. Merely, merrily, maryly, maryly, mirely. Wife was about a dream, your boat, gently rowed a stream. Generally, merrily, merly, barely, barely, gently down the stream. My face is melting. I'm melting.

Wow, I feel cured. Great. I feel enlightened. On that note, should we? We hear our question. Hell yeah. I think we should. Let's do it.

Today's question asker is a Canadian-American actor and podcast host who played Job the magician. Magician in Arrested Development. And BoJack and Bojack Horseman. He's one of the three hosts. A horse. I'm getting a horse. You're of the horse and you're getting a horse.

I'm getting a horse. He's one of the three hosts of the hit podcast Smartless. He stars in the new movie about stand-up comedy is this thing on opposite Laura Dern. Will Arnette is out. asking today's question. I want to see that movie. Hi, I'm Will Arnett from Is This Thing On?

If you had to live in a sitcom, which would it be? All right. If we had to live in a sitcom, that one is so easy for me. Oh, really? Because I have dreamed about this since, Alf. Alf is a, you know, near and dear to me, of course. But I have thought about this since I was a young gal. Yeah.

Because when I was young, for whatever reason, I'm talking like 10 years old. I was obsessed with shows about old people Meaning golden girls Emptiness You remember that? That's because you loved your grandma I love my grandma so much So I could

And I love I think I love the golden girls Because they were so sassy Yeah And I learned later in life It was because there was a lot of gay men On the writing staff Which I was like that makes total sense They tell it like it is

They tell it like it is Yeah you know I've never watched a full episode Oh my God I was so sorry. I remember when I was younger, I saw I would catch an episode or a moment here or there. And I would think, this is so funny. You know what? I'm going to watch this show.

And then I. And you didn't either? No. Oh, they're so good. They're so funny. Those women were like just had such chemistry. Yeah. Were they friends in real life?

They all got along? There was always a rumor that Betty and, um, B we're dating got into it a little bit right right um and i think they i think they loved each other but had also i think b was annoyed by betty at times there was a b in her bonnet yeah there was a be in the studio and also they were like i think in their i want to say 50s they were so young film which is so crazy but oh and i love we've talked about before designing women that's kind of in that same vein of like strong women and so my whole life I was like it is my dream to one day just end up in a house when I'm older with my friends eating cheesecake and wearing caftans

and uh what's a caftan like a real like a poncho almost like a it's like a wavy blanket that you wear almost but it's not but it's like why would I know what that is why why are you both pulling attitude a captain is pretty common yeah For who? Like I, you think I have a caftan in my house? Do you want to show you a picture? No, I don't ever want to see. I don't want to see what this thing is.

Says someone that's going to end up in a caftan at some point. Yeah, you're going to, up the three of us, you're going to be in a taftan. They're very popular in Palm Springs. Yeah, they are. Which you go to because you have in-laws there. Okay. We know what we're getting to take for her birthday. You seem annoyed that we're like telling you what a captain is.

I'm not just annoyed. I'm like, I'm angry. Your borderline ready to walk out. Yeah. I'm going to quit the podcast. It's like a flowy piece of fabric. I don't care anymore. You just put your head in.

And there's no, there's no, like, legs or arms. It just flows down you. I'm sorry I didn't know what that was. Like, kind of like your nightgown. Yeah, it's like your little nightgown. But there's no arms holes. Okay. Well, you're going to end up in a cap tan.

You're going to end up in a cat. You are. You are. Stop. Girls. Girls. Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart.

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That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R-com. Wayfair. Every style, every home. Wait, Fortune. This would be like an episode of the Golden... girls do you want to be you want to live in that world and do you want to be yourself or you want to be an older version i want either either option okay okay i either want to be in the sitcom yeah the golden girls as one of the girls that's eating cheesecake cheesecake is a big part of this it is they eat cheesecake they eat cheesecake a lot yeah and i was very drawn to that i was like you mean as an adult you can just

eat cheesecake whenever you want yeah i was fascinated by that wait you can yeah wow in a caftain how you can do anything you want and um but also in life i wouldn't mind a situation later on where i end up with a bunch of gals yeah with a bunch of your friends also are the it seems like the problems on that show it's like a problem of the week it's and it's never seen anything too scary like that would be nice and then they had uh so b arthur's mom so b's character's dorothy and her mom was sophia yeah and uh she was a real spitfire and always like talk shit and stuff. Did you have

a crush on any of them you think? I loved Rose, Betty White's character because she was very naive and silly and she would be like back in St. Olaf and I can't believe I'm going to watch it. I'm going to watch it. I'm going to watch it. This is crazy. If you were if, okay if we were on the golden

girls who would be who? And including tonne because aren't there four golden girls? Oh I know okay. That's true. Is there four golden girls? There are four girls. You would eat God, you would either be Dorothy or Sophia because you're cranky as fuck. I don't know, maybe Sophia.

Yeah, you'd be Sophia. Wait, which one, Sophia? The old one. Who's like sticking it to people. And you would be, uh, Rose. Naive and silly. Dixie one. I would be Blanche.

The, um, the like the sassy. Sassy. She's the, she's the, she was the, She was going out on dates with all the men. Okay, yeah. She was a whore. Fortune. Marie.

And so I guess that would, you would have to be Dorothy because you're tall and have a mustache. And Dorothy was, you know, adjacent to that. Okay. Oh, that's actually pretty great. You know, they have a lot of gay men do drag. Yeah. They do shows in drag as the golden girls. Remember how we had that one picture online where our social team

made us the Friends Actresses. We need them to make us for us Golden Girls. Yeah. I never thought in my life I'd be explaining the Golden Girls to people. This is wild. It's blowing my mind. I feel like it's so dependent on

what you grew up watching. Right. And so I'm saying it's less that I want to live in the world of friends. Although Penthouse Apartments in New York Pretty great apartment. It's more like I want to be part of the cast and like I was so captivated by, like, the behind the scene.

I wanted to know, like, are they really friends? And they just, it seemed so tight. I know. So I think I want to be. On friends. I think I wanted to be Matthew Perry so bad. Oh, really? Yeah, it was around the time of, like, Jim Carrey as well.

And Matthew Perry just was cool and funny, and I wanted to be, and kind of self-deprecating. Yeah. Yeah, I wanted to be, and he's Canadian. That's right. That's right. Yeah. You play hockey, right? Yeah.

Yeah. Will did. Oh, that's right. No, honestly, I forgot that Will was Canadian. I would never forget because I got a list in my head all the time of every Canadian. Of all the Canadians. He's very funny. Yeah. I liked all the romantic drama going on on friends as well. Like you'd never get tired of, you know, the real of your life. We were on a break. We were on a break. We were on a break. They were. Yeah. Teg? Well, here comes my age reveal. I, uh, I was obsessed. With success with good times. Oh, yeah. Never heard of it. Never heard of it. You've never heard of good times.

No, this is why this podcast is... Dan, oh, that rings a bell. Yeah, okay, good times. J.J. Walker. Okay. And John Amos, the dad. I mean, they were like this family

living in the projects, you know? Oh, whoa. And the comedy was there, but like the drama was so there. Like it could get earned. It could get like after school special. Oh, way after school special.

Like, it is like serious business. I remember Janet Jackson was on it too. Like regularly? Yeah, she was on there. And I remember one time she came over to their house and she had a like a burn on her from an iron. And it was revealed that she was being abused at home. Oh my God, this is a sitcom we're saying.

This is a sitcom. Holy shit. And it would get real. Yeah. But it was also really funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was so, so great. I loved 70, and black sitcoms in the 70s.

There was nothing better. Yeah. Nothing better. Yeah. Because I love the Jeffersons. Yeah. And also, not to bring up such a sad thing, but like Rob Reiner and like all of it. Like his.

all in the family did you ever see that I have seen oh my gosh just incredible that was also part of my upbringing of yeah you know sitcoms but I would I have to go with good times for sure like I'm moving I don't want a family one I want like sexy friends yeah like cheers I would do see I want to show up abused yeah you want to show up the book I want to be in that and like someone doing a wellness those old sitcoms had such great theme songs too Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

And I also, oh my God, the painting at the beginning of good times and the camera pans along this painting is so, I want, I need to get a copy of that painting. You got to get a copy. I got to get a copy of it. There's a documentary on Netflix right now about cinema in the 70s, specifically 1975. Oh. And it just was the best.

It's, if you watch it and you're just like, that's why I tapped out after, you got to watch I know, you don't watch anything anymore. Yeah, yeah. Good Times had a great theme song. Yes, it did. Jefferson, I think, might be the best one. Let's hear it. What is it?

Bees don't burn in the kitchen. Bees don't burn on the grill. Took a whole lot of chariotrion. Just to get up that hill. We're moving on up. Now we're down in the big lees, taking our turns out bath. You and me, huh,

there ain't nothing wrong with that. Moving on up. Moving on. Up to the east side To a deluxe apartment In the sky We're moving on up Best song ever

I don't Can we by mess up some of the words It's real good And Sanford and son I wouldn't mind being on that What about Will Arnette Like Arrested development would be hilarious

To be a bit highly stressful That's one of the best shows oh hands down yeah the joke ratio and that it's crazy oh love it it almost numbs you into like you can't even laugh anymore because every line is so funny yeah yeah that was the first time I remember you know because as we know I haven't followed a lot of um TV shows and whatever and I remember hearing people talk about oh I'm so sad I'm going to miss this character I'm gonna that family and and I was always like get a life yeah um and then When Arrested Development ended, I was like,

Devastated. I'm going to miss these people. Yeah. I'm going to miss these people. Yeah. Liza Minnelli on that show, who had vertigo all the time, her character. I got to go back and watch it. You got it.

It's been a while. It's so good. It was so unique. All those characters were like insane. Yeah. It was funny to see them like interact. It's also, it's been a while. I guess there's Tim Robinson is doing stuff.

but that something's been such a comedy like all the shows we're talking about have heart and pathos and stuff but not that arrested involvement doesn't but like I miss like silly big insane yeah yeah like when he when Tobias joins the blue man group

it's so good I have to go way way nonsense or I have to go way way devastation right you know clearly yeah yeah yeah like I'm The sitcom I'm watching is in the projects where people are getting abused.

To me, and there's a laugh track on that show, by the way. Is there really? Yeah. And then I like, dumb and dumber. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no in between for me. Boys don't cry or dumb and dumber. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I do love a silly, ridiculous comedy where everyone's absurd. Yes. That's why, like, like, when I did a couple days on your show with Will Ferrell and I had to, like, almost block out of my mind just all the, the like stepbrothers and I mean really well I know you have it takes you a while to sort of like like stop laughing at him yeah because you you just have to like take his character seriously not be an audience member yeah it's not to be an audience member because he's playing like his classic like overconfident absurd ridiculous type character that he does so well yeah so the beginning I would just always be cracking up I like that was a

funny. And they're like porch and you're on the show. Yeah, yeah. And I finally had to just like participate with him. Yeah. Sorry, Tick. I touched your foot with my foot. Oh, that's okay, dear. Oh, guys, I love it. Starting the new year with foot kisses. Yeah. Yes, foot kisses. What else should we kiss? Well, should we? Oh. How dare you? How dare you? You just made that. Well, you just made the same face that you made it, talking about a calf fan. Yeah, but you just said in a snug voice what else should we kiss and like i don't that you're well yeah i don't want you kissing anything you're giving you're giving lesbians a bad name you know you're like acting like we just love a bad name don't say that i love bad names fortune all right i won't kiss anything exactly

You just winked at me. Can we please edit that? I'm quitting this podcast. I don't feel safe. Yeah, I am. No, you're not. Oh, my God. Give me a kiss.

Give me a kiss. We're not letting you quit. We're not. I can't quit you. I wish I could quit you. I can't quit you. You don't have to. I'm quitting both of you.

No, you're not. Oh, you're not. We're not starting this year. You can't quit us. We're not starting a podcast. Stephanie and I. I'd say, never mind. I don't know how the story goes.

That was really genuine. Are you honest? Oh, I know what I'd say. Every now and then I go, what would you do if I left you? She'd be like, I'd just go with you. That's really good. I'm like, I thought you were going to say she was like, I'd be fine. She said you can't, I'd just go with you.

Oh, I'm like a lot. That's sweet Stop holding my hand Your hands are soft Have you felt? Takes hands I have Yeah more than you know

My fingers are between your fingers That is pretty intimate When you do your fingers In my God is a part of your body Fortune are you attracted to me Fortune Are you attracted to me? All the times

We've just been trying to make a pro Fortune Oh my God Oh my God I just scissors TIG's fingers with my fingers. Let me be clear. Let me be queer.

All the times that we've just been asked to make like a simple promo video and then Tiggs kissing all over you. Right. On Tiggs time as a friend and trying to make you feel loved. Yeah, sure. You can't just turn it on and off. Yeah, I can.

Whatevs? Oh, um... Yeah? Love you guys. can we edit that out can we edit that out Thomas the love you yeah no leave the love you

Thomas remove it you know what that fell away and also remove the finger violation that happened do not no blur it out no you leave it out you leave that love is I won't be silence

look at that nasty face you're Megan I won't be silence Oh, should we hear what Will has to say? I feel like you left the room there and you're just like, I won't be, like you got caught in some old trauma where you're just like, I won't be silenced. I won't be silence. I'll drink my spin drift. Should we hear Will's answer?

Yeah, let's hear it. Cheers. I live in cheers. Oh, my God. His question and answer reveals what a fan of the podcast is. Listen, he's obsessed with us. It's like Cindy Lauper. Well, calm down with how much you want to talk to us.

Would you have to write a cookbook? I like, he's like. I would. And Will is like, cheers. What's the common to be in? That's it. Cheers. He doesn't tell us.

He doesn't tell us why. I feel like they didn't tell him who that question was for. Because if he'd known he would have been gushed. He would have really delved into why. He wants to be on Cheers. I've got to see him on Cheers as the bartender as like a woody type character. I could see him on Golden Girls. I could also see that as well.

This is a dumb question. I just can't remember. Yeah. There's a few. So what's the riddle of my life? No, so was Cheers? It all took place in the bar? They never went out of the bar.

Do you remember if they ever went out of the bar? They did once in a while. But not often. They'd be at Sam's apartment or something. It was mainly. in that bar. That was a good sitcom, too. Well, they probably didn't want to promote drunk driving.

Sam Malone. People leaving the bar. Yeah. That was a, Kirsty Allen was first and they got. Kirsty Allen. She was second. Allie.

Cirstie Allen. What I say? Kirsty Allie. Allie is the real name. What is this? Felista Claw card again. I watched that again the other day and cackled. Philista clock heart will live in my heart forever.

Stephanie, it and oftentimes, you know, like she's used to me and silliness, whatever. She texts to me. She's like, I can't stop watching this. I couldn't stop watching it either. And the word Philista Clockhart is kept going around in my brain. I stand by. That's her name.

It feels like a character from Robin Hood or something. We have to find her. She has to ask us a question. Yeah. Just to say hi, I'm Felista Clockhart. Yeah. Yeah, she does. She has to.

She does. And we can blur out her mouth. Yeah. Cheers is another one where, like, it turns out all the actors were 35. I know. Isn't that wild? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, you probably don't know who Gene Stapleton is. Yes. The mom on all in the family. She was 38. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Why didn't everyone look so much older back then? Smoking. I think she was 38 or 48. Was it smoking? Maybe smoking. Really? The clothes they wore, too?

Maybe worse makeup, worse lighting. They were like a moomoo or house dress. Captan? Heard of it? Heard of that? Heard of it? So angry about those caftans. I can't wait for you to go to Palm Springs.

Why, you want to get some space for me? No, I want you to give you a caftan. Should I get one for my mother-in-law? Yes. She would love it. Perfect mother-in-law yet. If she lives in Palm Springs, she's got it. don't want a caftan because it's airy it's so hot down there you wear them in hot places

nothing underneath no ponty you got to wear some ponty do you ever wear them um no but when i enter into my golden girls era i will only be wearing those when do you hit that because i'm a year i'm less than a year away i'm at when i'm 55 i can legally move into a retirement community is that True? Yes. I'm going to wait till 65. 65. There's some places you can move it and that's who your friend is over here. I am retirement community agent. They need to change those ages as our life expectancy has gotten

longer, I feel. That seems young, 55. I'm going to wait until between 65 and 68 to have my golden girl's era. Oh, really? Wait, why 65 to 68? Yeah, because before that, I'm going to be. But why is 69 off the table? Yeah, why stop at 68? Boning.

Yeah. Pre-65. Yeah. Then I'm going to hang it up. You're going to stop boning. When I move in with my gals. Okay. Are you going to be boning the gals?

We'll see. It depends on the house. I have a lot to look forward to. You really do. Well, what a treat that. What an absolute treat. Will's quick. question and answer, full of information.

Yeah. But I learned a lot about you guys. I know. It did spark a great conversation. Why did you learn? That you like tragedy or extreme silliness. You already knew that. Yeah, but I didn't know that you wanted to,

I wouldn't have guessed that you wanted to be on a show. And I didn't know I was getting a horse. I didn't know that. You were getting horse. A horse. Your horse. It's the year of the horse. Can we just acknowledge that this is the first episode of the podcast where someone's almost quit?

We had the biggest fight that has ever happened on the pod. And things have gotten nasty. Nasty. Yeah. You almost came to blows. We got through it. Do you think there's listeners that believe when we were saying right now that we had a nasty fight? Yes.

I read the Reddit page. They really think we get irritated with each other, but I don't. we I can't think on the Reddit page they think that we're fighting about it I haven't read the reddit page we have a Reddit page I haven't read it in months and months because I started to notice people commenting hi May we know you're reading this and I thought this is too because I said on the pod I read it oh funny I didn't know we had a Reddit page so I haven't read in a while check it out so when we just casually said like that we had a massive fight there will be one some people that really believe that

say that was a close call yeah I see comments every now and then on our Instagram that are like they're fighting again sometimes they think we interrupt May too much sorry really yeah I don't think that's true we kind of interrupt each other all the time yeah that's kind of the nature

that's what happens with three people also sometimes I'm rambling on I don't have I honestly don't have a single problem with either of same yeah same same same I've never felt let's set this record straight on Reddit the joy I feel in my heart walking into this room and doing a live recording with these bozos

unparalleled it's immeasurable I got the joy joy joy joy down in my heart Where? People project their fears and insecurities Yeah that's true yeah we're right That's right we're objects of projection and that's fine and I love it Look we locked fingers that's very sexual.

Oh my god. Take I would never violate you in that way. I'm not going near your webs. I know. I would. Just kidding. No, it's for the pod. Fortune.

Don't touch me. Fortun. That's so rude. Can you guys write about it on Reddit? How Fortune just said, I was trying to grab you for a wink there, but I missed the moment. There you go. Well, okay, what a podcast.

What a podcast? And I know we all have some tour dates. I'll tell you real quick. quick here that I am going to be in Fort Lauderdale on January 14th. I'll be in Orlando, January 15th, Tampa, January 16th. That is both of my parents. That's their birthday. Aww. I know. And Fayetteville, Arkansas, February 19th. I mean, it goes on and on. Oklahoma City, the 20th of February. Midland, Texas, February 21st. Anyway, go to Tignotaro.com for all show information, and if you have not yet seen, come see me in the good light. Some people get scared

of this movie. Oh, don't be. Yeah, they think it's like too devastating. They don't want to be depressed. It's the opposite. It's really funny and really uplifting. Yeah, yeah. And it gives you this urgency of like, I got to make some changes and really, really appreciate my life. Yes, there's some sad moments, but it's all in all, it feels good. I am on January 13. Soon, I'm at Largo in L.A. with Lisa Gilroy. We're doing an insane show called May and Lisa Surprise Party, where we're just surprising each other with things we've planned. And it's going to be ridiculous. It's so fun. It's so dumb. And we got special guests. It's going to be great. And then my tour starts on the 26th of February. I start in Oklahoma. And then 27th, I'm in Houston

and onward. Just go to maymartin.net for all the tour dates. I'm doing 47 shows, guys. Come say hi, come do the... And tour dates change. So always... And get added. Shows get added.

Cities get added. Go to websites. Constantly check back. Join my mailing list on maymartin.comnet. Yeah. And I'm excited about that. Yeah. This weekend, I'm in Mobile, Alabama,

and New Orleans. And Atlanta, all back to back. I'll also be in Indianapolis. Cincinnati, Milwaukee, Des Moines. There's a bunch of stuff. New York City, right outside of Philly, Burlington, Vermont. Yeah, on my website as well. Fortunefeature.com. Do you think people listen to this part of the pod? I don't know. I hope so. Sometimes there's little hidden gems in it. Do you think people listen to the pot? No. What if people just tune in for the end? They do listen to the pod, you guys. We've crossed 50 million downloads. Holy cow. That's a lot. Holy moly. Holy cow. That's a lot. I think back to like the early conversations of like, would you be interested? What do you think of doing this?

Like, should we do this? And here we are. Here we are. And boom. Boom. Well, we appreciate everyone that listens. I really appreciate it. And please share episodes with friends.

Help us build the community. Yeah. It's really, real. And go to Reddit and talk about our nasty fight. And also make sure to rate and review. It's really, really help. And go to YouTube, sign up for that. I got to say, there's also lovely people on Reddit as well.

I mean, I love the community. It's 99% really sweet, joyful stuff. It's impossible to get through a day walking on this planet without somebody saying, Keep It Handsome. Oh, my God. It's the best. You guys are the best. Yeah, we appreciate you.

On that note, Keep it Handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Tignotaur. May Martin and Fortune Themster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Willett. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com. Follow us on social media at handsome pod. What a podcast. What a podcast.

That was a hate gum podcast. Checking Allstate First could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. not checking for happy hour specials when you're out for an early dinner, that's an unforced error. You're telling me mozzarella sticks are half off, I would have ordered twice as many. Yeah, checkin first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook,

Illinois. Hey, it's Tignotaro from the Handsome Podcast. And I'm May Martin. And I'm Fortune Feinster, also from The Handsome Podcast. And we wanted to let you know that we made a very fun special episode of our show sponsored by Squarespace that's up now on our YouTube page for you to watch. Hansom finally formed a band and recorded a hit song live in the podcast studio. And we documented the whole process for you to watch. It's by far the most ambitious and inspiring moment on our show to date. I feel like we can't say much more about it without giving too much away. So just go watch us make complete fools of ourselves and have the best time ever. Or become the newest pop sensations. That's right. Go to YouTube.com slash handsomepod or listen

wherever you get your podcast. That's YouTube.com slash handsome pod to hear us record a song live. See you at the Grammys. Oh, for sure, buddy. For sure. Get started on your dream website head to squarespace.com slash handsome for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use the offer code handsome to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.