Hate Watch with Devan Costa - I Gave You My Teeth

Episode Date: October 21, 2024

New goof, boba tea appropriation, an old friend of the show goes on the balloon dating show https://www.patreon.com/c/hatewatchpodcast

You motherfuckers, you motherfuckers, you motherfuckers, you motherfuckers, you motherfuckers. All right, welcome, welcome to the show, everybody. We have a fish on the hook. We have a fresh goof. Fresh goof coming in hot. Joey, explain the situation. You got hit up by like us like a Veterans Association. Yeah, so I got spammed. I'm laying on my bed hungover waiting to do the pod Dodgers Ron you guys were out in my bed. I get a text just to spam and it goes hey Logan

So it's a wrong number spam. He goes. Hey Logan. My name is Mike First off. Thank you for your your service I am an Arizona VA specialist mortgage broker and then he goes on to explain this offer where I can get to skip payments and an escrow check refund blah blah blah blah blah so I respond and I say I'm actually in a war as we speak and so I think that's gonna be the end of it because it's so so ridiculous But he goes of course sorry for the inconvenience. Yeah, and I said I also love this that he's like Oh, this is an 818 number and in a war

Five still it's like it's still an area code from America Well, he thinks that I am like an American troop that is fighting. I'll just read it. He goes, what's your coverage? That's insane. You have amazing coverage. I'm a Jason Bourke. So then I go and then he goes, of course, sorry for the inconvenience. And then I said, literally dodging bullets and missiles right now. Haha. Are you free tomorrow if I make it out and then he goes where in the world are you I hope you stay safe and I like he's like who the hell the damn heck so then I said so he goes where's the world are you I said technically this is classified left my ass off but it's a guy texting him over like with his hands right here and he's

kicking his feet technically this is classified but about five clicks outside of Kharkiv but short answer is yes I am interested so what that's like the deadliest city in Ukraine I don't know if I'm pronouncing it right So then I said also if you know anyone in the area with heavy artillery weapons, and that would be the time to say so It's getting real hairy out here. And then so he doesn't respond for a little bit and I go Mike I need you to promise me you'll tell my wife I love her if this goes sideways on me buddy. No time to explain Please say you will do it and he goes I will do it can you send me a number so then I sent him Logan Kira's phone number from the famous forefathers goof and he goes so I said in the number then I said text her right now and tell her I love her and I'm sorry I wasn't a good enough I wasn't good enough at being a soldier to survive this war But I said tell her I RPG the tank and then quit or parentheses I actually did and killed a guy with a knife

Those are two big achievements at war a tank and a knife kill. That's really cool Then I said also please send her more info on the mortgage stuff Cool that I said also please send her more info on the mortgage stuff No response so I said text me when you do it and then nothing and then question marks Then right now just before this pod. I said Mike my phone isn't working You're the only person it will let me text their call. Do you copy and then he texts back just now Roger that if I do not hear back tomorrow. I will send her the text Godspeed. He's getting into it He's using the linga like it's reminding him of his days. He's like honey. I'm kind of in the war right now Say like

Okay, so calm right now is it on the blue tooth can be died yeah, thanks. Yeah Is this too much Started over I guess We told while I tried to connect you oh, it goes to his company! Turn it down, turn it down a little bit. Let's see if we can get him. Haha! Fuck! This could be a huge dud.

Fuck, come on. Say, Mike, please pick up. Pause the shooting. I said, Mike, text me a number. I can call you direct now. Should we wait it out? Yeah, let's wait. Let's go. Let's do the pod and then if he responds.

On the backburn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I gotta hang this up. Your call has been forwarded to the voicemail for Anthony Saba. No one is available to take your call. Guess this went to somebody else. I think this is one of those.

It's like they got a voicemail with that voice. Yeah. Yeah. Hopefully he responds. Imagine you listen to your messages and you just hear Hopefully he responds. Imagine you listen to your messages and you just hear pshhhhhh. Oh, that would have been such a slam dunk.

That's such a bummer. Fuck. He's been responsive. Maybe he'll give us a number of weeks. Let's pod and then if. Can't get a hold of these guys. Based on the back burner, yeah. Oh man.

God damn it. I've also been posting all this on my Instagram and I doxed him. So I'm wondering if like a troll, I wonder if like Matty Ratz texted him right now or something. I have a feeling this is like that, like this man's a scam artist and works at a call center. I don't think he's like a veteran.

No, he's not a vet, of course not. Vets would not be spamming other vets illegally. That's illegal illegal span. Yeah, I didn't opt in he's got the wrong name like I can sue for this Yeah, you should sue So we're gonna go put them on a fucking freeway Underpass I'm gonna release Nick's ribbons on him I want to call Logan so bad too tomorrow. Well, I got this up and oh, yes. Oh, yeah, if he texts we'll jump right back into it. Yeah so apparently there was a

Massachusetts Senate debate last night and this guy said something pretty wacky while on It's wacky. It's just interesting to bring up. On overdraft fees, where folks like JP Morgan Chase were making more than a billion dollars a year. So there's Pocahontas. Of people who were struggling making it day to day. I'm in those fights, but I think crypto ought to have to follow the same rules as everybody else.

Briefly, I would say everyone would attack inflation the way she attacks crypto. I wish she would attack securing the border the way she's focused on crypto. You know, she's so focused on crypto. She had the CEO of JP Morgan Chase available for questioning and they had financed the largest child sex trafficking operation in history with Jeffrey Epstein. You know, Senator Warren didn't ask a single question. She wanted to talk about crypto because she's so hyper-focused.

Now I know that because I was raped as a child. I was a piece. I was a little more sensitive to those child rape victims. Now as a guy with good pussy. Why would you not ask one question? This is actually incredibly bad. Yeah, it's cool. Yeah.

It's just the funny, the timing of it to be like. Look at her face. Look at her face, she's going, what? Here's's the thing about Coinbase is I was raped as a child. Let me tell you something about crypto. I was spit roasted as a little boy. I would say Ra's al Ghul. He's like, what you really need to understand is blockchain. Now I've swallowed so much seed in my life My uncle tried to put a baby in me at nine years old my face look like a Jackson Pollock painting, okay

People are not paying taxes on Bitcoin and I was raped as a five-year-old It's so funny cuz it's like point could have gotten across so easily without saying that. I mean, Elizabeth Warren looks like she wants to clown him. I just think she's about to cry. Ha ha, this motherfucker was raped. She's Nelson from Fucking Simpsons. Hee hee, hee hee. Ha ha, you were raped. Virgin Islands, and Senator Warren doesn't ask a question.

You want to know why? Because a former Democrat president is involved. She's too busy speaking to coyotes in the She knows are involved again Loyalty to an agenda once the last e to a party I come back I come in and I want transparency She's like what the fuck is my life? Your booty hole was touched He goes now if you'll excuse me the cum in my tummy's making my stomach hurt.

So I'm gonna go throw up. I'm gonna go puke this cum at. I look like John Travolta in that movie where he steals the train. I like how it ends with her going, so look. Here, hold up. Transparency on everything. I'd like her to answer the question

on behalf of all those rape victims though. So look, I was raped a lot too, okay? Okay. It was the taking of my innocence at age one, two, and three. He just seemed like there's like, like, Cardi B like had sex while pregnant or something. Yeah, it was a. That caused a big ruckus.

Was it with a famous guy? I don't think, was the other guy famous? I don't know. I don't know, I know in Cardi B it was like the, B like had sex while pregnant or something that caused a big ruckus. Was it with a famous guy? Was the other guy famous? I don't know. I don't know, I know in Cardi B it was like the, you know, the guy that drives the subway or something. There's a guy in front of the bodega, yeah. You know, she's a trashy trashy bit. I don't get what's weird about that.

She's like a little subway rat. I mean, I personally. I find pregnant sex disgusting and I think you should be locked up if you're a woman. Well, not with your husband. No, it's so gross. You're turning your pussy into a little, like, pedophile glory hole.

Devin has always said this about pregnant sex. Your dick is going right up against your infant, an unborn. Just an infant high-fiving the tip of your penis. It's not OK. It's really weird and creepy. No sex. What pregnant?

It's a whole category on porn. It's not my thing. I don't like it. No sex, what friend? It's a whole category on porn. It's not my thing. I don't like it, but it's, I guess they say chicks are the horniest when they're pregnant. Yeah. Yeah. Well, let them suffer. Look, it is, I get where you're coming from.

I disagree. I think it is a little weird, but- I think it's better Philip. Another guy, like getting fucked by somebody who's not your baby daddy. Yeah, that's creepy. It's fucking disgusting. It's worse, it's worse.

So much worse. Yeah. Was she cheating? Yeah. Yeah, cause she, cause she. Oh damn, that's terrible. No, they were like currently not together. So not cheating on you guys.

I don't fucking know. I mean they're just. Oh, that's crazy. They don't have like a, you know, they don't have a 1950s relationship. They're not a conventional couple, yeah. Cardi, I'm home. If I wasn't cheating, I don't really see what the big deal is to be honest

I just think pregnant sex is this year to Scott you've always been disgusted by it. Yeah, I think it's cool You think it's evil think about how weird it is you make a kid inside The person you fuck and then you fuck them with the kid inside you're getting John all horny day You're making me like really really like that. He loves drinking milk. He loves he he loves. I didn't even look in my auto blow in like a couple weeks. It's so funny cause like the cum options are also bad too. If you bust inside of her, that's really invasive and gross. But if you cum in her stomach, that's also like kind of a cum shot on the baby's face.

Also when you cum inside your pregnant wife, does your baby go like, oh man, he's gonna see daddy or that. Oh, he's just like, he's like, hey. Oh, he's kicking like, hey, cut it out. This says, this is so inappropriate with children there. I'm disgusted. What school is this and is it close to me? This is fine.

This is, you know, there's an epidemic of really hot teachers out there now and they're trying to, you know, the lib cuck agenda wants to take this away from us. They want to replace all these Latina chicas with big fat trannies. Oh. Big fat.

I know where you're going with that. Just a guy reaching so far into a barrel. The lib cuck agenda, they want a fucking they them freak They want that. they them freak. They want that. To play tic tac toe with your kid. But. The quadruple D wood shop worker. And we want him with that.

And you know, the. This is in a third world country. Is it? Yes dude. No structure like that exists. Third world countries love like hot women doing shit. Yeah weird uniforms. Damn I wish Dean Withers was here to sign you

This is their jungle day everyone do your math homework and then Jack off to me Giving a lap dance in front of children. You see, but this type of sexualization in school is okay. Yeah, that's fine. I agree. You know? We had a hot teacher in high school who, it was my gym teacher, Ms. Duran. She later became the dean. Oh, so hot. Goddamn. And she wore like, skin tight leggings and camel toe popping out. And one time she was showing us stretches in front of the gym like it were all like on mats.

And she's like now this is advanced. You know if you're comfortable doing this try it. And she put herself in that full on porn pretzel position like both legs behind her back. God damn. That's diabolical to kids wearing gym shorts. Yeah. That's crazy. You're attacking me actually. Yeah. She's a, she, I bet she's a pedophile dude Well, we think she fucked one of the kids actually blur name Fucked up. I don't know why you're protecting a pedophile. We think she fucked one of our buddies Why won't he admit it? Cuz I don't know but he like we saw like we would seem like walk out of her office like all red and like disheveled

And we're like did you fuck mr. A like no Like all coy I'm like, huh? Did you fuck mr. A like no like all coy I'm like, huh? Thank you did mark sounds like nothing's wrong with that. Yeah, it sounds pretty awesome. She has a lucrative successful career, mm-hmm Emily saves America the friend of the show Recently did a little debate with a with a college kid proud of her man. You know, she's getting out there Let's say I don't know.'t know, people keep sending me this clip. I don't really know what she did, but she's making the rounds, and we'll see.

She always goes viral. She goes viral all the time, so there's no way this is that. This is me debating Emily. This isn't gonna be crazy or anything. Sending the right to get abortion back to the state, leading like 65,000 victims of sexual abuse. I think it should be state by state. Okay, why? That's fine. I think if everyone in a by state of sexual abuse. Okay. Why that's fine

I think if everyone wants if everyone in a state wants something Yeah, that's fine. So everyone in Alabama wanted slavery back. You'd be okay with that. She fell into this trap sure if everyone I want to go ahead right Oh Okay Now all right. Well, let's go next topic. I'm getting nervous I just want to clarify you understand understand that that was the same argument? We should get in a second chance, okay. Hold on, she's gonna help.

Explain. Right, so do you wish that the Confederacy won the war? Because according to your worldview, the Union impeded upon the state's ability to legislate as they liked. No, but it's an irrelevant argument. No, so you're glad that the Union won? Like I'm not some like psychopath, like I live in LA, I'm not some crazy right-wing person. So now you're saying it's

State wants something sure let them have it you agree with the Confederates. Yeah like blacks the articles Actually work on your textbook definition actually got your moments do not work on her Shared five billion times. She obviously doesn't want sleep. Cause she just got, she was nervous. 20.4 million views. Yeah. But yeah, anyway, that's,

she loves, we love her. Yeah, friend of the show. Friend of the show. Lover. She was, it was a real hate watch argument. Yeah, it was. It reminded me of me drunk, dying on a hill about something I don't really care about. You're like way better.

If I was in that situation, I'd go, cause I would have said something like that. I would have initially said like, yeah, it's a fucking state's issue. If people in a state want something, fucking give it to them. And then this slick little queer would have come right back and said that. And then I would have, if I went that far where I was like,

yeah, sure, let him have slaves. If that means, because then I would have said, here's how you make a little more music. You then go, yeah, because that means the black people want slaves too. Yeah. And then it's all ridiculous. You kind of got out of it.

You go, yeah, so if everyone Alabama, including the black people wanted slaves, I would let them go find a new race of people to make slaves. Yeah, you go, actually, how about an issue you brought up? Black jobs, you're against black jobs? Wow. With slam dunk argument, you won now.

You go, who says we didn't pay them a little bit, we just called them slaves. Shut up. Shut up. No, that was shame on this guy. He tricked her and... Shame on Dean. What's his name?

Slippery Twink. Is this 14 withers? His name's Slippery Twink. Slippery Twink. And then Stein is just sitting there the whole time. He like the whole, I watched some of those. He's a genius though. Stein is a public intellectual.

Yeah, he's a really smart guy. Who's hosting debates now. And he, yeah, he was just the whole the whole episode. He's like, you're really hot. You're really fucking hot. And yeah, anyway, you look beautiful. Are you serious?

Yes. Go to a little slimy twink in a cock. I watched it too, and he kept bailing her out in moments where it's like, this is good. This is what you want for your show. Yeah. Stop telling her out. You like, listen, I get it. Like you want to defend her or whatever, but this is what is gonna do Iron Man numbers.

Make her be in a corner. Let her- Stiney was holding a happy dad cell turn. He goes, she does make a good point about slavery in Alabama. And then, so then, you know what's funny is that when I watch some of this This debate because that's this country the economy is now debates. No nothing will ever get done

The the wreckage and the decay of Western civilization is just up for debate for people to make money off of debating like no one No one wants anything to actually change. No one actually has any honest like good faith intentions here because everything is just entertainment. It's now like Paper view and if I was slippery twink versus venture bureau Yeah, that would be fucking who's the go beat up his wife How Steven Crowder Steven Crowder slippery twink versus Steven Crowder and then the winner takes? Shapiro, I guess Crowder Crowder he goes to Shapiro. If he beats Crowder, he goes to Shapiro. Winner also gets Crowder's wife. Of course.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shapiro's sister. All these people would hate if things got better. He's racking up conservative hotties, come on, dude. Dominating them as a slippery twink would. He's just a slippery twink, dude. Come on now. He's like a, god, he's like a dastardly villain.

Yeah. That guy also has like a passive, saying the n-word non-stop Oh, that was the weirdest part. I listen to it too. He said the n-word back in the day Yeah, at some point. He just volunteers this information. He goes, you know, the n-word used to be part of my vocabulary Yeah, and we were like how we know only when I was with black people. It doesn't he didn't really explain it He was just like saying the n-word. He was like he was like on twitch and shit. Just doing like I call it When I was in a car passing black people on the street, but I used that word Just so weird to give that info out unless like somebody was already caught

That was already big controversy He's completely owning what was funny is that ever like the interview they were like you're really smile of respect for you like that Type of thing and then I went and saw this go viral and What was funny is that ever like the interview they were like you're really some I have respect for you like that type of thing and then I went and saw this go viral and Then I went to this kid's page and it like Emily is just calling him a grifter fag They're both fighting each other horrible. I'm a faggot in the debate. Yeah. Yeah the whole time like I have so much You're so smart and like five minutes. They're just like you're fucking dumb cuck faggot retard. It's like so much respect for you, you're so smart, and like five minutes later she's like,

you're a fucking dumb cuck faggot retard, and it's like, holy shit. Yeah, you really must suck to have to take the high road. Yeah, it's not nearly as fun. Being a lib cuck sucks, man. Yeah, tell me about it. You can never just, I mean, if he wasn't a lib cuck, he goes, you're a fucking dumb whore.

You're a Havasu whore, you know? Exactly. Slam dunk, okay. But I'm gonna download Havasu whore. Yeah. You know? Exactly. Slam dunk, okay? But. I'm gonna download Havasu whores tonight. Yeah. La Torre. Yeah.

But she did good there. That was like, it was like, it was like Gore Vidal. Yeah. William Buckley. Yeah. Level debate. It was like how you just

hosted by Stiney. Yeah. Moderated. Throughout the episode, Stiney goes, well, cause I'm the moderator. Hold on. Let me explain. Let me let her talk. Uh-huh. Yeah. Moderated. Throughout the episode Stiney goes, well, cause I'm the moderator, hold on, let me explain, let me let her talk. Uh huh. Yeah, it's just, we're so finished.

He goes, hey Vidal, Vidal, sorry dude to cut you off. How much can you bench? Give me your bench presses, guys. Hehehehehehehehe. Imagine if like on Twitter the next day Gormitall is like, you're a fucking fag, Buckley. You're aifter fag. You guys see this guy, this Ravens fan, who he was really excited about the Ravens winning

and he expressed himself. He expressed himself. He's got a dragon. Screamin' done. What the hell's going on? I don't know why the sound's so loud. Oh, I did see this. It's a ruler.

He just finds two random commanders fans and beats the living shit out of them Holy shit Reminding the cool sky ball time. He's actually pretty sick damn. Yeah, well he went viral Could you mute it and play one more time? He was arrested you know I actually right after I did it I realized YouTube might have a problem with that. I was thinking that. Oh, shit. The violence thing.

So, might have to blur it. But yeah, so we've all seen the Ravness Ravens fan. Yeah, he's getting arrested and they found him and he's losing his job and he might face like 10 years. Was that truly like unprovoked? Yeah, completely unprovoked. He just went up to two random commanders fans and beat the living can you play it for us only one more time? Yeah, it's really fast

You sure yeah, so he just walks over and he just sees them in different jerseys They're not they're not even talking shit. No one knock out Against the wall Damn, he goes down. He runs off, and then he's gone. And he flexes, that was, that was. Yeah, his name's Jack Callis, and I want him on Hate Watch. How gallus of him.

His boss calls him, like. How can we possibly say that? That's a good one. Holy shit. His boss calls him, he's like, hey Jack, I saw you being an absolute badass online, unfortunately we have to let you go. Love that flex, Jack, but you know.

If you were my son, I'd be proud about him. You're boss and I'm disappointed. So the really obnoxious Asian from Barbie is making the rounds for being a really obnoxious Asian. Which one, Simu Liu? I fucking hate that guy. Yeah, he sucks my ass. I really hate him.

Probably my least favorite celebrity. Yeah, he's incredibly- Of not just Asian, could you be more specific? Oh. Oh. Yeah, he, he's getting, it's all turning on him. Yeah. People are a little sick of his shit.

People hate him. Yeah. So watch this. Yeah, put it on the- And I don't think he's even, whatever he's saying, I don't think he's like Taiwanese he's saying. I don't think he's like Taiwanese. I think he's just like Chinese. I am studying your can and I am looking for anything

that tells me where boba came from and where boba came from is Taiwan. So it's a white, it's like a white woman that started like a boba, a canned boba company. Is this Shark Tank? It's Sumble. They're like a rip off of it? Something like that, yeah.

And I started this venture company for a lot of reasons, but really primarily to uplift minority entrepreneurs. And not only do I feel like this is not happening here, but that I would be uplifting a business that is profiting off of something that feels so dear to my cultural heritage. Tapioca balls. Your cultural heritage.

Something that feels so dear to my cultural heritage, tapioca balls in a milky tea for fucking emoji people. Chinese people are the biggest intellectual property fucking pigs of all time. And they like, Yerba mate, that shit is, there's like, you go to Peru and they'll have like herbs and stuff, they're supposed to stay in the country. You're not supposed to export them

because they don't really have like an agricultural base we have, so they lock that shit down. China stole Yerba and just started breeding it in fucking China and then Yerba mate happens. Shit like that. They constantly steal software. They constantly steal software and like, fuck this guy. You fucking retard.

All you guys do is steal and that's a thing he's a fucking Self-righteous retard who's on me. He was one of the guys who led the crusade against Shane He was yeah He was like a the biggest voice like celebrity voice on Twitter because he's an Asian actor and all of his tweets went crazy viral Wow, I'm dead. I'm Shane. Yeah. I realized I hate this guy. I Think before that he was on now couldn't before, but he was on like that show Selling Sunset, Valor was watching it, and he was buying a house and it kept being like, well now that I'm a Marvel superhero I must get a bigger house. Like I was like, oh you are so horny for fame, it's disgusting. He also sucks at everything he's doing. He's awful. What hero is he?

He's a Shang-Chi. Who is that? The legend of the Ten Rings. Oh, actually, I kind of like that, to be honest. What does he do? He does karate. Eats cats and dogs. He agreed to that. Yeah. It's safe that I like the movie. I had no idea that that was this.

I fucking love Asian people. Yeah. I was joking about, you know, earlier. I realized it's racist It would be a great move if I was if I was like a Hollywood exec and I Could I do I guess people do people remember Shane's thing with being about Asian people probably? I mean the people who are in the know now He's he's famous yeah right after that happened though if I was a Hollywood exec that had money to spend and didn't care about public

Backlash I would have made him Godzilla like he would say shame would have played about public backlash, I would have made him Godzilla. Like he would have played, Shane would have played Godzilla. And he's just like walking through town like, what's up dude? Fucking I'm gonna stop on you dude. I'm gonna fucking crush your fucking little Asian head dude. Knock out of our skyscrapers. He's Godzilla has his hands together.

He's like, hey dude, I'm gonna fucking crush your fucking building dude. He's holding a Bud Light and a microphone dude. Sorry about your fucking building, but it's fucking gone, dude. Fuck Sinoleum or whatever this guy's name is. I'm gonna fight King Kong. Is Godzilla doing a fucking Trump impression, dude? So yeah, let's get back to this fucking,

grrr, there's some words. Shane's gonna say, there's some words, grrr. I love Shane's, though. That's a little, Shane. There's some words for you. I love Shane Zilla. That's even worse than saying slurs. Oh, big time, yeah. Just look at somebody go, there's a couple words that come to mind.

If I didn't have social decency, I would have lost. I'm a good person. But there's some words that come to mind when I look at you in your face. That's a good insult. Yeah. I'm gonna start doing that.

Do it. With every word. There's a couple words that people have said about you before that I'm not gonna say. Titch, I want to be a part of bringing boba to the masses. But not like- It's already, boba's a really- Every block. What are you talking about? Are you fucking retarded?

You're talking about milky tea, you dipshit. It's sugary bullshit. I have eight boba places within a block or all of- They're all over. They exist for fucking college kids. He's just the biggest virtue signaling. Yeah, he's a thug ass. He sucks. These exist for fucking college kids. He's just the biggest virtue signaling. Yeah, he's a dumbass. These people are fucking morons.

Yeah. So for that reason, come out. Not these people. Yeah. Sure, sure. There's some worse for you. Thanks. Respect that.

Respect that. They're so scared of any racial backlash. They can't even be like, dude, shut up, it's a fucking good product. Dude, listen to this guy though. Now he goes, it makes me sad how successful this business is. He's like actually actively trying to hurt these innocent fucking boba makers.

Small business owners. Small business owners. Makes me sad that people are, you know, they're drinking boba with a raccoon with a sun. It doesn't mean that they don't have the- What's the raccoon with the sunglasses have to do with fucking anything no idea He's upset about that too. He goes that's also a little racist raccoon don't like that I'm saying Simu said that right see me says that I would never say that you don't say something like that

Yeah, you wouldn't do that dude Seamus just yeah You won't do that, dude. Seymour's just, yeah, he's just doing this. You're a liberal cock. You never said that. He's been. Opportunity to change and do that. That's true, but there has to be a willingness, and I have to be able to invest in these founders

knowing that... I hate that he has money to invest. God damn Marvel. God damn them to hell. They didn't say no. The collaboration that they've had to this point is With their supplier in Taiwan and if nobody else has told them that before you can't put that all on them He goes you're a dumb Indian lady He was okay dot head

Look at the look at his face. Hope the poop demon gets you shut up stinky That's so funny. He goes, what's your product, diarrhea balls at the bottom of milk tea? God, I really, and he's not, he's from Toronto. Not good. Not good at all. Gets me going.

I want to do a deep dive on Simu Liu. Simu Liu, what do you say, stupid name see me leo, I think see me leo. I think no leo Whitney Let's find him. I'm gonna look him up. We're gonna like send people out. I'm fine. The docs and slaughter them see me leo Sucks ass on you. I'm gonna type that in on you sucks ass Cultural appropriation at its finest. It's the same clip. I would love like a elephant graveyard

at too late to try to do a video on Seamooly-oo. Ooh, good idea. Yeah. Yeah, okay, let's just type. They don't go mainstream. Interview, interview. You know? Company apologizes.

Whoa. Oh man, come on. A Canadian take on fuck tea. Fucking losers. You never apologize. It's because they're Canadian. Oh, cause they're just real nice. They're just, no, it's because they're the biggest cocks of all time.

Yeah. Justin Trudeau. They're just trying to save face. Yeah. Justin Trudeau called him and was like, you need to apologize. He's wiping blackface off. He's in face.

Justin Trudeau called him and he's like, he doesn't know how to be liberal, but all he does is try. And he goes goes you need to apologize to that Chinaman. Quebec based Boba recently pitched itself on CBC's Dragons Den. That trendy sugary drink you are cure for and you are never quite sure about the French Canadians. Now that she sounds like that I'm kind of happy he's ruining her business. Come on, French-Canadians are great people. George Zepierre.

No, great people. Jean-Claude Van Damme, I think so. I like some Canadians. Those days are over with Boba. Hang on, hang on. I'm quite sure about its content, but continue. Okay, the entrepreneurship. By the way, apparently, I think Boba,

I think it was created like 40 years ago. Yeah, it feels relatively new. The tapioca balls were also. I don't even I think they could be traced back to not Asian yeah tapioca. No, it's a big thing It's a root the little balls. It's a root. Oh really? Oh well my white grandparents are eating fucking tapioca pudding Oh, yeah Feels Jewish or something feels like it feels doesn't feel Feels like too corny. It just feels like an old person thing.

Yeah. ...pitching their version as healthier and less ethnic, but actor and potential investor Simu Liu wasn't keen. Why? Are there gonna be new takes on things? Sure, but I'm looking at... Not everything has to be true. Sure, but these two round eyes piss me the fuck off. No, but then there's also an issue of cultural appropriation. There's an issue of taking something that's very distinctly

Asian in its identity and quote unquote making it better, which I have an issue with. No. It'd be so funny if the next guy to come in is like, I'm selling a Chinese finger trap. What do you think? He's got like a big rice hat on. He doesn't notice who he goes, go on.

He's like, wow, brother. God, I really hate Simu Liu. Simu Liu. Fucking stupid name, hard to remember too. Not for me, I hate him. Hey, how about this, bub? Jackie Chan. Half squad.

Can you make it a little easier on us? Short round, how about that, bub? Jackie Chan. Half squad. Can you make it a little easier on us? Short round, how about that, huh? How many are criticizing the company for selling a Taiwanese beverage? This person from the business was like, oh, people are using it. Okay, first off, all these people want, they want everybody to mingle and not be racist.

And then when people get really into something from their culture, they call them racist and appropriators Yeah, it goes in a circle. It's in it's bull. It's bullshit So all beauty of America is that it's a melting pot all these cultures together. Yeah. Yeah, it's like a nonsense today Yeah, your Canadian scumbag black people get away with the best because Asian people want to be black also. Yeah Yeah, it's like a perfect yin and yang right right right, you know, yeah, but yeah Sure about the content like what is there not to be sure about don't say that It's like a perfect yin and yang. You know? Yeah. But yeah.

Sure about the content? Like what is there not to be sure about? Don't say that it's not an ethnic drink because it is and it always will be. Major Chains have offered... Imagine being proud of Bobo. That's pretty nuts. That's our ethnic heritage. Are you kidding me? You dipshits? Like it's gumbo? Like we were given the tapioca balls when we were slaves and we had to make the best of what we had.

So we put it in our sugary tea and we poured it over with milk so people would have farts all day. And we put a little cover on it and you could turn it upside down and none would come out of it. And we had to do this as slaves. All we had was the tapioca balls. It was a cultural heritage. Remember when we were slaves 40 years ago? Fucking assholes.

And what are your people doing to Uyghurs? See, Muliu? Wait, what? Uyghurs. They got slaves, they got Uyghur slaves. Uyghur Muslims. So Taiwanese people are Chinese people ethnically. They just kind of breeded with like island people

a little bit, but. Acting like it's some amazing dish. It's little tiny disgusting balls for freaks to drink They do get oddly weird fucking ladies and Cookie Monster pants to walk with their stupid crocs Into a shitty boba time and her son Jayden. Yeah, and every time I discussed me people getting boba I just I could smell the farts from their car While I walk by I could smell the farts from their car while I walk by. God knows how it stinks in that shit hole.

Fucking disgusting. You see some shitty Toyota Scion pull up and just two fat whores get out with their Cookie Monster pajamas on. And their stupid fucking foamy shoes. Just their foamy shoes, like, you know, cause they need their knees, their knees need protection from the hard floor.

Cause they gotta get back home and eat, they gotta eat some flamin' hot Doritos and have their boba. And then maybe do a little elote corn cob with smothered in mayonnaise. It's like, oh my God. I picture Mexican right away. It's not Mexican, it's not Mexican. I've seen this everywhere. There's a place called Menchies. I pictured Mexican right away. It's not Mexican.

I've seen this everywhere. There's a place called Menchie's. That whole thing is totally, elote is being, is B&B's becoming more mainstream with just like a fast food. Well, either way, I see Mexicans doing this every day. As I walk by Boba, I see these women in real life. There's a farmer's market in Burbank on Sundays. Whenever I go see Boba, I see these women in real life.

There's a farmer's market in Burbank on Sundays. Whenever I go see a movie, I end up wandering through it. And it's a farmer's market for fat, fat retards. And I stroll through like I'm Owen Wilson in Midnight in Paris. It's a May exit, me too. It's taking the sides. It's like it's a flea market in like in Morocco

or something, but it's like, it's literally just fat people eating like corn dogs smothered in like nacho cheese with like it's a lote's dust They had it coming they had it coming they had it coming boba suck my dick leave this disgusting drink Or products with less controversy for example Starbucks marketed Asian origins with its recent tea. Are we honoring the place of where it comes from? This food writer says framing bubble tea as unfamiliar is off base.

It's not new, you know, without dating myself necessarily. I remember this being, I remember there being so many bubble tea shops in Vancouver in the 90s. The company didn't respond to CBC News inquiries, but on Instagram, it said it was sorry and will reevaluate branding, packages and marketing strategies. I think they're going to need to make some big changes to their brand and how they tell their brand story in order for that to happen. I don't think they can keep it to that.

I wish I did job in another planet so I could say it. Should I email Baba the company right now and be like, hey man, don't let the haters get you down. Love your tea. Fuck you, that Asian guy. Yeah. Let's just start biggest. They're our new sponsor for free.

Baba? Yeah. Everyone get out there, remember to buy Baba. This episode's brought to you by Baba. Baba Milk Tea. Maybe. It's a terrible name. But for a company already sold in big retailers

like Costco and Sobe's, it may be hoping this controversy has already bubbled up. Sobe, for Asians. Yeah, so I guess there's not much else on Sima Lee. I wish he would've like, I wanted him to have some more moments of embarrassment. Damn, this is getting a lot of coverage. Oh yeah, it's all over.

People love shit like this. Can't mix. Yeah,, it's all over. People love shit like this. Can't mix. Yeah, he looks like a hero. Keep food segregated, you know? Keep the hate, keep the differences, you know? Seema's like, my next victim, Mitty's tacos on Sunset Boulevard. Yeah.

Fusion really does. Wait, wait, go, go, go. What's that? 10 things Seema can't live without. GQ. Put that on. I don't know if we could watch Do people do these guys get angry about like fusion to nunchunchucks, ninja stars, katana. Deep fried cow pussy.

Rice farming. What'd you say, Dave? Nothing, I don't know. Just like, would that guy get upset if like they were mixing a French thing into the boba? Would he get upset like, I hear the fusion happen? Well, you know, the French.

I think so. Yeah. Fusion does kind of suck. The French original fusion. There was some there's a Middle Eastern taco place that opened up that I really wanted to support because I watched the whole thing on how they do it. And they seem like good guys and from Glendale, they're like Angelino's and stuff. And I wanted to try it out because they just they were endearing in the video. And I got it the other day.

And I was what was the fusion? Which two? It's it's Middle Eastern tacos. So it's like it's like it's like shawarma taco or like. Sounds good so far. I got it. But it's gross. I got it and it was like, just kind of like,

not necessary. The whole time I was like, I wish I was just eating Mexican food right now. Well it kind of just seems like at the end of the day, it's like the only difference is the type of bread they put it in. Yeah. They put it in corn tortillas.

Yeah. But it had like, you know, like saffron and it had like middle Eastern like salsa or whatever. That actually sounds gross. Was it beans? No, no. The only thing good was the quesadilla because it was just like a quesadilla basically, but the tacos were like, there was, I don't know, they're just new, like ZUG sauce is the salsa.

Sure, yeah. It wasn't necessary. Yeah. And now I hope the place suffers and I hope they go out of business. Costs email. No, but no, but yeah, Fusion doesn't need to have, Fusion already, we already have Fusion. It was the Conquering.

The French did Fusion with Vietnam. Banh Mi, song is Fusion. We already are done, no more Fusion is needed. Okay, there was a lot of blood shed for a fucking, for a, yeah, for a Banh Mi. Tex-Mex. Yeah, the Alamo. That's the for a bond me Tex max. Yes. Yeah. Yeah the Alamo That's the last fusion acceptable Tex max

So this is interesting There's like it's like a black like a dating show and is the bubble pop stuff the balloon pop. Oh, yeah balloon pop I don't know what that is. What is that? Girls walk out and then they the guys are all holding balloons. They pop them. Oh I don't know. I don't know fucking love those videos. Yeah, they're good You know, she's like doing it's like a dating game in my opinion And over here we got a pop your name and age I'm John I'm 27 Okay, hi John and John why did you end up popping your balloon?

So I didn't think that you were indecisive or anything like that. I think, you know, maybe it might be the nerves or something. But for me it was like the lifestyle that you said you wanted to live, like the countryside, farming, all that. I've lived in the city my whole life. I'm not a country person. Like I've tried it and I just wouldn't succeed in that. So just wanted to pop and not waste time. Okay, no problem. And now is he someone that's your type? No, okay. Why not? He looks a little gay Damn she really hates that. Okay, if you're not it's okay. He goes, what a gay guy fuck you right now Your pussy for seven hours, I'm not gay! He grabs her. How about eight inches thick? Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha. Uh. Loving and supporting. I love it. I miss that guy. That guy rolls. That guy rolls. I'm sure he's dead, but he rolls.

That guy was in the middle of a manic episode. He died like four days after that video. Oh yeah. He's wearing like a diaper. It was crazy. He chatted shit. He chatted. Yeah, that's the type of guy that like, he one day, he's wearing like a diaper. It was crazy Yeah, that's the type of guy that like he one day he like snapped and he like thought like a roller coaster was like His enemy and he stood in front. Yeah

Sound like that guy one day decided to fight a train. Yeah I mean you are dressed gay. I mean, yeah, you know this whole like I think that lip gloss on to I mean you are dressed gay. I mean yeah, you know this whole like I think that lip gloss on That guy's down low the fashion looks like a pimp. He's like a lot of no a lot of guys like that or flame point He goes you look I think the reason I think that he seems offended by that means he's gay. Yeah, I think he's gay I think he's just annoyed. He's slightly annoyed by I think he knows he was cut I mean, I think he is annoying because like he gave such a honest answer of like I'm sorry What if he's like, oh, yeah, I'm totally gay. Yo, I better all suck this dick. I might throw up. I'm gonna throw up. Yeah, it's disgusting. Oh, you caught me sucking him up.

Look, bastard. Oh, I'm swallowing this fucking gum, huh? And then the guy comes and he spits out. He goes, yeah. Right. Would a gay guy not swallow? Hello? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

That was it? That's it. Fuck, I love those videos. I thought more would happen. We should watch one of those. How do we watch the full one? What is the channel? Go to Balloon Pop Dating Show.

Is it all black people? It usually is. It's fucking hope. It usually is. Balloon Pop Dating. If it's white people, we got nothing. Go to the channel. Go to the channel.

Yeah. Go to the channel. Just buy some girl, REO. Go to videos. Wow, what a queen she is. She has really started to fuck us. Go to videos. She's a titan of industry.

God damn it, Devin, go to videos. Yes. And hit top. Such an honor, bud. Popular? We've done this so many times. There we go. All right.

Let's do that one. Let's do that one. Oh my God. I wouldn't say that she's my type. Oh, you gotta go when the guy walks in cuz that's like a really funny reveal Oh, yeah All right, so we're gonna be bringing out some single men one by one Come on out around this corner. If he's your type you like what you're seeing, you know, everything is just on point

Do not pop your balloon. But you know, if there's anything like he said or, you know, whatever it is, if he's just not your type, you can't see yourself going out with this guy. Go ahead and pop your balloon. And then I'll go over to a few of you see why you ended up popping. Y'all ready to get started? All right. The cabal hairs.

Let's go ahead and bring out our first single guy. Not because she's like she had the same kind of cadence. No, it's okay It's going out on the web that's the only problem No, no, I don't post these Do a few things I own two media companies I Run a clothing brand and I also make music on the side I mean bro The best thing of all time is sometimes the guy will walk out and every girl will pop their balloon immediately

That means they want him or they hate no they do not want him if your balloon still inflated you're into the guy Okay, I've watched guys come over like no neck and they're like five foot four and they're just like And then they go down the line and they like you know and the guys like damn shit And then they still make him interview girls. Oh, that rules. If I were a billionaire, I would pay whatever they wanted to have John on this. Oh yeah.

I'd watch a sex life here, like I have a fucking motorcycle, I'd kick ass. Right out on my motorcycle. Not a single girl pops their balloon. They love John. No, they're all squirting. They're all flicking their beards. Yeah.

No, this is just a black people's version of Next. She's like, okay girls, you can't masturbate on the show now. Man, black dudes have like so many businesses. I like that you're bald and homeless. I like how you eat onions and shit. I mean, being like a racist podcaster is like- You be eating office beef, you be making office beef, you be eating like fermented beef and shit. I like that it's been some time since you last shit your pants that shows growth

This guy said he has a clothing brand Yeah, then you find out he sold like four shirts Yeah, you kind of find out that they made a couple LLCs like three years ago, but there is no business. Yeah, but they're like, I'm a business owner. He's also a rapper. Yeah, okay. What do you like to do for fun? I love thrifting.

I love, yeah, thrifting, shopping. They go, he broke. Coffee shops. I'm like a museum goer. I'm not much of a clubber. Somebody pops up and goes, okay, but take my mixtape though He wouldn't be into I mean some of them They turn it but is he gonna be into her I mean, you know, no, absolutely not he goes he goes bitch

Why don't you pop you a balloon right now? I Look for someone who's gonna be able to be supportive of me and like help me with my Loving and supportive. How about 12 inches? Lost my daughter last year I'm looking for somebody who would like pay my rent Think about that video all the time and I'm'm like, I think I really said all that. Because I lost my daughter and wife, and how about 12 inches and thick?

Like, it's such a crazy combination. How about age, dick? Like, I just said I prefer skinny guys. I don't know. And it's so funny, because I think the girls look like they're like 16, too. And they're like, Jesus. You found me, you asked me what kind of guys I like,

and now I have this giant fucking roid in that dude with a huge cock. Jesus. You found me, you asked me what kind of guys I like. Now I have this giant fucking roid in that dude with a huge cock. He's fucking screaming at me. His family's dead. You got Frank Castle over here fucking coming at me. I wish we could. I wish we could like fact check that guy.

I would love to find out all those dangerous rules. He killed his wife and daughter. Yeah. It's so funny. It's like his wife and daughter daddy goes go to the beach What are some body surfing today make some sandcastles try go viral. I'm gonna get some pussy Got it and now what are some of your deal breakers deal breakers black one Having kids is one. Holding balloons. Damn shit, kids? No, she wants kids. She wants kids, yeah. Okay. Might be one. I'm 26. You're 26? Okay. Got it. Okay, cool. No, he said having kids. Like if a girl has kids, he's not gonna date them. Oh shit, okay. Oh shit, okay. What's going on? Alright, if we can have your name and age. Brianna, 26.

I do have a child. I have a son, so. He looks gross. God, dude. And Brianna, what do you do? That's gross. I work for a medical record retrieval company, so I mean, they have us doing a lot of different stuff.

But yeah. And now prior to him saying that kids were a deal breaker for him, you did have your balloon unpopped. Why did you? I was slow on the draw to be honest I would like to hear more though but yeah deal breakers the deal breaker I like fuck my kids all right you stupid bitch once you get your ass home raise your kids what? I would say... What makes her your type?

I think I like her presentation. I like her tits and her pussy. I imagine her pussy looks really good. Her ass. What makes you like her? Why do you like her? I don't know, her pussy, her tits, and her asshole. When I picture her pussy, it's drenching, sopping wet.

I'm picturing her pussy underneath her clothes right now and that sounds nice. My mind's eye it's dripping with sweat. He goes then I got the kid news and now I vision a dune worm and it's kind of a deal breaker for me as well. But yeah she's cool. Thank you. Let's go oh right here. If we can have your name and age.

I'm Charisma and I'm 27. Charisma, damn. Charisma, what do you do? Charisma. K-H-A-R-Y-Z-M-A. Dude, I genuinely think black people name their kids right. Have fun with it. Yeah, have, yeah, sure.

Yeah. It's so much cooler. Her balloon's a hot air balloon. That's cool. It's very good. It's a weather balloon balloon. That's what. It's very good. It's a weather balloon. She popped her balloon. She popped her balloon and falls to her knees.

She looks like that ghost from Ghostbusters. Alice. And why did you end up popping your own? Bitch, you look like slime. I mean, the deal breakers were if you're older and I'm 27 and he's 26, so. Yeah. And then before he said that you did have it unpopped? Yeah I mean he's tall he you know is sure about what he wants. He's got that

battlefield earth haircut too. Have you ever dated someone younger than you? I have yeah so I mean age isn't a big deal for me, but you know if it's not I'm I've been around actually She's cool, I like her charisma yeah, I wouldn't say that she's my type um fat yeah He goes ectoplasm kind of a deal breaker for me goes well. The host goes, fat, okay, so next? Okay, next. He goes, not really my type, fat. So you mean fat. Now let's go to the next contestant. Let's go to the next contestant, whose name I'm sure is like Musso and Frank.

I'm gonna look at this up there. My name is Musso and Frank Jackson. Thank you. All right. And I'm back over here. So we do still have quite a few balloons unpopped. So the game gets switched on over to you. I wonder why this is the most popular one.

Something crazy must happen. Yeah, why is this such a popular show? Is there any bumps? Oh, there's gonna be more, there's gonna be multiple contestants. Oh, the end has some big ass bumps. Oh, the end is big. What is he, like, kill them all?

Well, it's probably a different contestant. Oh. Shit. I wonder. Do they bring in like a troublemaker? Yeah, sometimes they bring in like absolute pieces of shit. Oh, beautiful. Yeah.

Beautiful. Should we skip? Yeah, skip to the end, see if there's a new guy. This guy's kinda boring. Bump, bump, no, we don't. Oh, dang it, okay. Oh, new guy, this guy's hot. A lot of balloons popped, holy shit.

Get a lot of them. They're all gone. What case you like retarded? What are you know? Does he come out drooling? He looks like he mines blood diamonds He's looking for a sign She's pretty all right, let's go ahead and bring out our next single guy Because why is my son? What is it with the way you do a camera here

He goes up to one of the women he chops It's that 12 star general from Blood Diamond. He pulls out an AK and they're shooting into the sky. He's like, you want boom boom? He goes, my name Coney. 27. 27, okay, what do you do? He's looking at him like already way too salaciously.

Wait, what was his job? He's doing this shit. He's like Looking at his lips are you looking all types of good? Was a job why do they hate him so much always a job always a job How old are you? I'm 27 27. Okay, and what do you do? I work at a plant but also a personal train Oh, okay. I work at a plant. He works at a Wonder why that she hated that. Yeah, I don't get that. Interesting. Personal training.

Really work out, just self love, focus on self love. What if she didn't get with that? She goes like, how you work at a plant? So what, your boss is like a little tree or some shit? So you tell me you a Keebler elf? You a Keebler elf, that's what you are, huh? You making fun of me, huh? So what, you like work for flowers?

Okay, so you're all about the gym? Yeah. All right. Help as well, help as well. Okay, and now what are some things you look for in a woman? Really, make sure she love herself first and then just she gotta understand that a happy man is God's plan.

Knee strong back. Now, what are some of your deal breakers? Gonna be digging. What are some of your deal breakers? I'm very interested in why they hate him. Smoking. Smoking is just a no deal for me. Well, I'm high right now, baby.

That's really it. And then you got to be a gym girl. Be a gym girl as well. A gym girl. OK. And I can tell a lot of y'all never heard of a gym. So we did get a couple of balloons. Let's go on over to these girls and see what's going on.

We'll start right over here. We can have your name and age. My name is Jacqueline, I'm 25. And Jacqueline, why'd you end up popping your balloon? I'm initially not really attracted, but also you said you want a gym girly, so I'm not that either. We really are a great trait lady.

She's working at the milk farm, that's why. Is she someone that you're type of? I'm not, she's works at the mill farm. That's why. She's not. So is she someone that's your type? I'm not. She's good. She's good. Thank you. See? He say, even if you're not a gym girl, he's billing you.

He's fucking huge. Holy shit. Yeah. He also, he keeps giving, like, I will find you after this look, though. Like, he's nice. All right, if we can have your name and age. I'm Lex.

I'm 23. OK. And Lex, why did you end up popping your balloon? Because he's not my type. Like, just physically, he's not my Lex. I'm 23. Hey and Lex. Why did you end up popping your balloon? Because he's not my type like just physically He's not my type. Okay, so physically what is your usual type? Big fat case More oh no, I just I don't know I can't even tell you He looks like he's gonna fucking kill her

I can't even tell you just like he looks like he's gonna fucking kill her Interviewing these chicks before the show to make sure they can talk he looks insane. He keeps doing that under by it Okay, and now is she someone that's your type This is sick he's so horny. We can work something out. Let's go. I ain't against nothing. It is what it is. I don't know none of y'all.

Hey, things can change. OK. And they will. Let's head on over to JG Wentworth, Washington. I'm a fan of JG. Everything was cool, but you say you don't like people who smoke, so. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, well, you're ugly, too, so I don't care. Same thing. Same thing. Everybody's cool, but. He goes, all right, that's so Raven. Get the fuck outta here. I respect it. Okay, let's go on over here.

We can have your name and age. Hi, my name is Mishnah, I'm 23. And Mishnah, why'd you end up popping your balloon? I popped my balloon because at first you said you're a personal trainer, but then I heard you speak about how much God is in your life, and I was like, darn it. But then I also kind of, I just felt like,

more or less, I just don't see us being compatible. And Mishna, what do you do for work? I'm an old Navy mannequin. She goes like this. I don't get how, like, he was a personal trainer affects being into God. I don't know. That's an interesting.

He gets ripped for Jesus. He's so big into the gym. I'm not a gym girly whatsoever. I personally dance. That's my choice of exercise. So I didn't want you going to the gym and me feeling, no, I'm good. I didn't want that to be an issue. So I just figured I just wrapped that up myself.

I also don't really trust the fact that you got a mouse that you taught how to do tricks and when you touch people, you can cure diseases. Also the fact that you're on death row and... The flies coming out of your mouth kind of deal breaking. Like, you know, oh my God. You look tired, boss. That took me a minute to get out.

I was like, damn, you're being really mean to her. She's not, she doesn't look like Michael Clarke Duncan. Jesus Christ. See, there you go. I actually got go. This could have been... Next mom. I got you though. I'm sorry, it's just that. Great teeth too. Great teeth, physical fit.

They all feel good. What is it though? Let me know so I can work on it. Hello. Seth, improve me. It's like beauties in the eye of a beholder you know you know this guy's a madman at the gym oh sure you know if you look at him wrong yeah growls at you you know there's like viral videos the guys who are doing pull-ups with like the like bench strapped around their waist yeah they've got they've got like on a chain yeah yeah yeah someone else's cup of tea just not mine

all right guys okay Calvin candy walks in he's like you're my cup of tea I have some work for you boy! He breaks a stick and throws half of it out oh my god dude superimposing Calvin candy in the lineup would be the funniest image of all time. He's just waiting, he's waiting patiently. He's holding 10 balloons. He's doing the meme face, like. What do we have here? He watches and he goes, I'll take all of them. He goes, I don't think I'll be popping this tonight.

Jamarius, we're having a white cake. So, we have three of them. He looks at his buddy and goes, you are safe tonight. This balloon might pop tomorrow. I didn't have you ask the ladies a question to kind of help you narrow it down and see who's more your type. So I already got the gym thing out the way you want some fuck 50-50 50-50 The bill 50-50 Broke-ass bit Backtrack on my past relationship that we was doing 50-50 there and I didn't like it.

Because I feel like if I'm cooking food, if I'm cleaning the house, you know. Oh, that's fair. Okay, she's doing that. Alright, baby. But a lot of women don't do that these days. Wouldn't explain. It is, can you adapt? That's a better question. Can you adapt? Yeah, okay. Yes, I can.

Because I can be holding you down. The under-elect has a kid and he's definitely not into that. No, not at all. When I was being chased by the Predator in downtown LA, I can. Because I can be holding you down. The only girl left has a kid, and he's definitely not into that. No, not at all. When I was being chased by the Predator in downtown LA, I had to adapt, OK? I shot him with a shotgun. Covered myself in cold mud. See, Kayla, that's why you should have just asked him.

You're right. That was my fault. I'm sorry. You good? How you good? What? Mm. You know what? Hold on.

I'm about to do it again, because you know what? Shoot my shot at him a long time ago. And he never gave me the time where it's this slow. He probably don't want to send it by the way. He's, what's the people? Security at the club. I'll be trying to shoot my shot there too. He looks like he's kicked me out of a couple plays.

I don't even care no more. He worked at Echo Park Rising. Yeah. He's doing goth night. That's all you gotta say for yourself. Emo night? Uh, yeah. All right, it's just like, if I see you in the club all the time, it's just, come on now, let's be real.

It's not even all the time, but I also got you on Instagram, so. What does that mean? Make some shit shake. Why'd you pop the balloon, you dumbass? You're trying to fuck this guy for like yeah, you're upset she's jaded So you're saying you see her out too much? And that's like a that's not like even though even though I work security at the end of the day

I'm not making money. She was out making money. This is kind of fuck this guy. Let's go. Let's go the next bump You got Fuck this guy this guy. Let's go. Let's go the next bump Okay, come on. Oh shit. Yep. You too. Oh my god Yeah, I think we have to watch the initial walk in because the bubbles being pop is the best This is gonna be a match And if you have one is waiting, okay There we go Here we go Here we go Calvin candy is the guy he comes in he goes I'll take them all

Five okay, what do you do? How much for the whole bunch? Like the big bitch. He's on a horse and carrot. What is it? I don't know. And I grew up in this. Why do they hate him so much, or maybe they don't? Okay.

He's a slub. And now, what are some of your deal breakers? NBA player Grant Williams. Just ruthlessness, being disrespectful, especially depending on certain situations and stuff, but really that's the main thing. Okay, all right. And then for the ladies to kind of get to know you a little bit, what do you like to do for fun? I play basketball. I play paintball as well. Also, I'm getting into my motorcycles. Paintball? Paintball should have gotten us up. You say you play paintball? Yes.

Ooh, oh. Get back into that. All right. So we did get a couple of pop balloons. Let's go on over there and see why they ended up popping. Let's start. Such a weird time we got that far. If we can have your name and age. I'm waiting for one of the guys to just punch a woman.

That pops a balloon right in front of them. That might be the end. This really is like the stars version of Jubilee. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's like Breaking Bad versus Power. Yeah, this is like. They're not really. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah, it's like we're like a Breaking Bad versus power. Yeah I don't have the self-esteem to do this. I'd cry

I'd walk in there I'd walk in there and I go, what? You don't like this? You like this thing? I start rubbing my cogs over my pants. You start eating a toot or a stand. What's in front of them? You don't think I can be cool at the club? You don't want to introduce me to your cool past friends?

This isn't cool. This isn't cool to you? Look at me. I can put my pussy in. I get on all fours. I start crawling around and going Meow! Meow! I go, that's not cool. You don't like cats? You don't like cats? You don't like cats? That's my fucking move.

You start to find the laws of gravity. You're on the ceiling. You're head-twistering. You like this? Uh... Uh... You like this? We could have been great together, Cantavia. You fucked up, Promethazine. You fucked up, Promethazine Janssen. Just the biggest freaking cells to come. You spider walk in like.

Spider walk in, I'm on all fours. You go, wahey. Your neck is super long and like it starts looking at them from like around. You start doing that chimp run on all fours. I look like skippity toilet. He's running like James McEvoy in Split. Exactly.

You start pulling your own teeth out. Why would you want me like this? I'll give you my teeth. I gave you my teeth. You popped my balloon, I gave you my teeth. Well, I guess you won't be getting this, a Judd Mason jar of my toenails. I spit out my teeth.

Bleeding everywhere. Give me my teeth back. Bring me my pliers, bitch. On all fours, screaming, I'm bae. You know I'm bae, Felicia. It's like the Emerson Spooky on the Black T.D. show. That's all our guys. Suck! Fuck!

Who wants to suck me? I work at Cracker Barrel. I walk in and I go, ooh, I love balloons. Yeah, what are we celebrating? I like giving gravy. Who wants to hit up rascals? You're gonna make me embarrassed to walk into rascals with me? Well, she must be into the Emerson College graduation center.

I like sucking dick! I like sucking dick. By the way, ladies, I'm a flaming homo. Another gay entity. There you go. And I'm a thousand years old. You think I'm not cool? I can dance. Do the dance. Oh You Jeff Goldblum in the fly it just freak of all time We got a name this entity by the way for the record, what's the once the Anthony's name? What is this case? No, that was the Emerson spooky at this

This wasn't full turned into the Em Spooky, but it's a different. The episode's gonna be called I gave you my teeth. I gave you my teeth. Here! Pfft, pfft, pfft. And I'm looking at him, I'm bleeding out of my mouth. Oh! No one pops a balloon, McAlvin Candy pops his balloon.

He goes, just not gonna be here. I go, what even is this thing? And then finally I get up at the end and I act all sassy like I wanted to go. Bye Felicia. Yes, Jamarius, could you kill this fucking thing for me, please? I look at them and I go and I shit myself. I summon a shit and you just hear my pants.

And then I fall on the ground on my shitty ass. What happened? Baby, I got you. You changed my diaper. I got you changed my feet. I've been told I'm the cool white boy. You shove your pants, you're scooping the diarrhea in your mouth. It's food.

It's food. Reduce, reuse, recycle! And then I go, I knew it was because you guys were hating me! I'm self-sustaining! You guys just hate me because I'm white! Oh my god, we are losing! You're racist! You're all racist! You're all racist!

And we go, pfft! Now I'm just picturing Tom Perlman. Spitting teeth out and shitting myself. Eating the diarrhea, throwing it up, eating the throw up, putting the teeth back in. Tom Perlman would be a great guess. Tom Perlman walking out. You guys know how my name's Tom.

I'm saying nothing and just shitting a bowl. I'm naked, scooping it up. I'm fucking burning up, holy shit. Oh fuck. Woo! Woo! Fucking burning He does have one of those like big fat hips Yeah, he's good. He's good. Let's go to this Let's come on up come on up. Yep you too All right

Did that question go back to you or any final questions between either one of you before we determine if this is gonna be a match? And if you have one is waking oh We have to go to the ends of these, because that's when the guy gets to decide if he actually wants her. What is she thinking of? She's thinking about being on a spaceship, invading Earth. She's like, is that an acrobat going to be able to stop me this time? We got a match!

Okay, I'm going to take this mic. He's not excited about this. for you for her. We got a match! Okay, I'm gonna take this mic. He's not excited about this. I get the fuck fat, comorally. I've always been into big fat cone heads. Really glad I got fucking. All right, let's go ahead and bring out our next single guy. I like them clean on bitches

28 28 and what do you do? I'm like I'm the lead singer of the gym class heroes Customers accounts make sure that his voice Make sure that his voice sucks Him fraudulent use of their account Pay him back if it's a fraud I made a beat for deltron the homo sapien The lady that's into God likes him Evidence I found okay pretty cool. Yeah, and now what are some things you look for in a woman. Yeah, why just? Kind of like my other half.

You know what I mean? Someone that complements me, someone that's a. What? That can't. By my side, definitely. There's one balloon. For just me. There's two.

There's two left. Oh. That's nice. Now what are some of your deal breakers? Calvin Kennedy's like, you will be my house boy. You ain't cut out for a lot of the stuff I want the other guys to do. And just the close mindedness, you know,

not willing to just try new things and you know, just be spontaneous. Okay, all right. So we did get a couple of pop balloons. Of course. Let's go over just a few of these ladies, see why you ended up popping their balloons. Sure, of course, of course.

Okay, let's start over here. Of course. We can have your name and age and why you ended up popping. Gosh, she's got some weird titties. My name's Kayla, I'm 23. I just popped it just because I don't like your outfit. I like your face. I like your height.

I like everything about you. I'm sure. You just don't like his outfit. I would definitely like. This is all good fellas from Target. My next question for you is what kind of outfit would you choose? You have something against Mossimo. Okay.

Why don't you take that up with Mossimo then? I was here to meet someone special. Mossimo I'm actually I'm missing the guy that walked on all fours and shit himself Maybe Don't you want me? Even though I'm fucking gay, I'd rather fuck him. Oh, I thought you teleported home, baby. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. He's got portals. You're welcome. Now is Kayla someone that's your type? Yeah, actually. Yeah, I like the braids. Very beautiful.

Thank you. Yeah, tattoos are cool. Thank you. She's definitely someone. This is like Emerson Spooky goes to Atlanta. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. It's like the scene in Borat when he gets out. are cool thank you she's definitely like Emerson spooky goes to Atlanta it's like the scene in Borat when he gets out but it's the Emerson Spooky

he has the mesh underwear on approach okay yeah let's go over to another lady we're gonna skip around if we can have your name and age and why you ended up popping it. See, she's learned which ones can't talk. She's like, okay, I know. You're just not my type. No worries. Like, your whole aesthetic is just not,

it doesn't fit me. Sure, no worries. Your outfit, whack. That's cool. And now as Lex, someone that you would approach. Stance, whack. Yeah, no, she's beautiful. Love the hairstyle, love the dress.

Tattoos are cool. You just said the same thing for the last two. Yeah. Okay. the hairstyle of the dress tattoos are cool. You just said the same thing Love the pussy love the tits Yeah, love this pussy love this tits and love this ass I'm 22 years of age and I just pop because Even though I don't really know you but No shit. Are you ladies pop your balloons like this? I just pop because even though I don't really know you, but based off of the physical attraction and all the physical attraction.

All you ladies pop your balloons like this. This really is. I respect that. I love your freckles. I love your freckles. Well, why'd you pop your balloon, bitch? These chicks are weird, man. No, is she also someone that you would approach?

Oh yeah, definitely. Everyone, I'd approach anybody. Dresses great. Dresses great. 30 years of dry. You're beautiful, definitely. Yeah, no, I'd approach anybody. At this point, I mean, what's with a fucker catcher's mate?

And I do, every night. Oh, so yeah, I told you the religious lady was the only one that was gonna give him a chance. Yeah, yeah, it's just as really as simple as that. Like, I've just seen good, beautiful black love, and that's what I want. Hell yeah. He's one of those black dudes that like loves same.

Is that my porn search history, or? That's the one, you, sorry, you're out. I bet this guy's life is one of those black things that like love that my porn sir history or You I bet this guy's life is hard in the black Obsessed with like horrid toads Big on like I kind of like Family first date. I'm really big on like the picnic kind of setup I know it's a little hot for that But we can do okay noon to the like to the sunset kind of like picnic date you feel me Yeah, you know Sam which is the the sandwiches the the the grapes the water the the blanket I'm thinking take you to Mendoncino farm

I'm just a lover boy at the end of the day, so. Definitely just looking for love. He's like a black Martin star. Yeah, it's fucking nuts. I work at Adventureland. Is it a yes for you for her? Definitely. We got a badge! Oh, yes, definitely.

This is great. Oh, I'm about to lose my virginity. I don't even think I need to drug this one. I guess I'll throw my GHP in the dang car. Now, we get to the end. Oh, this is getting gnarly, bro. I just came in my pants, so can I give my balloon back? We gotta watch him walk in, bro. You have to watch him walk in.

Now let's get back to the bone. All right, watch. Um, what do you look for in a woman? Um, my pussy dits. My pussy dits. Pussy dits. Ass. Ghetto booty.

Chad? I like a bumble booty. I'm 29. 29? Alright, and what do you do? I wear sunglasses inside. I'm a restaurant manager, model, rapper, actor. And now what do you look for in a woman?

Quattro bulls. Threat. Peace. I'm one of you look for in a woman? Quadruple threat. Peace. I'm one of those jack of all trades, master of none. Respect, you know what I'm saying? And by that I mean I'm the manager of a jack in the box and I'm a porn star. No you can't. And now what is your job?

And when I say quadruple threat, I actually meant I'm a dangerous threat in the head. I'll say one of my best things. I will steal your catalytic converter. And by quadruple threat I mean I have four STDs. I will srab you and shoot you if you try to stop me, is what I mean. Okay, all right, well we did get a couple of pop balloons. Let's go on over to these ladies,

see why they ended up popping. Let's turn right over here, if we can have your name and age and why you ended up popping your balloon. My name is Jacqueline, I'm 25. You wanna skip to the bottom now? I ended up popping? Start right over here. If we can have your name and age and why you ended up popping your balloon. My name is Jacqueline, I'm 25. You wanna skip to the bottom now? I ended up popping because you said you want like a hustler.

Here we go. I'm talking to myself. If you can't talk to yourself, you can't talk to nobody else. Self evaluation, yeah, self evaluation. You hold it all to like. I talk to myself all the time. Oh, he took the sunglasses off and turned retardant.

He sounds gay actually. They gave him his power. He lost all his swag with the sunglasses. He's cross-eyed. Yeah, he's like the kid in Big Daddy. He was cool with the sunglasses on. Well, I thought y'all were invisible. Just talking to people. Right now I'm being raped by Adam Sandler. It's not crazy, but talking to myself. It's not crazy, but Adam Sandler adopted me.

I'm John Stewart's kid. He's like, yo, you like Scuba Steve? I look in the mirror and be like, hey. So you're honest with yourself before you could talk to anybody else? Exactly. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, yo, you like scuba Steve? I look in the mirror and be like, hey. So you're honest with yourself before you can talk to anybody else.

OK. That's awesome. No, I don't have no questions. He goes, but once again, Sonny raised me. My real dad is Kevin Garrity. All right. I don't think you have no more questions. Any final questions from you? No, I don't have no more questions any final questions from you

Let's question throwing sticks in front of rollerbladers What time is McDonald's breakfast and my biggest question to you is if I hock a loogie and it touches the ground I slip it back up. Is that a deal breaker for you? Y'all like you like ketchup packets Is that a deal breaker for you? Y'all like, you like ketchup packets? And is it a yes for you for her? We got a man! What's an ideal first date? He goes, 20 packets of ketchup.

She be awake, don't pop her below. Why is this chick so crazy? Y'all pop it. I feel like we kinda nailed it with this. Yeah, is that it? All the bumps are coming up. It's a huge bump, yeah. It makes it seem like they get slaughtered or something.

Our next single guy. It's Richard Ramirez. He's covered in blood. He's got pentagram hands. Hello, welcome. Already? Oh, I've seen this one. If we can have your name.

I've seen this one, it's great. Here we go. Aaron, how old are you? I'm 29. I'm a Ninja Turtle. It looks like the baby. Wow, he looks crazy. He goes, I'm a street shark. And that's not promiscuous and has a career going for herself. Okay. Yes ma'am. And now what are some of your... He already talks like an old man.

Deal breaker, being promiscuous, not cleanly. He's like Eddie Murphy's nerd character in both of them. Okay. All right. Yeah, it makes for like Jonathan Majors. Go ahead and go on over there and see what's going on. They like him though. Oh, he starts talking.

He's bowling. It gets bad. Alright, if you can have your name and age and why you popped your balloon. Hi, my name is Karma, I'm 24. Oh, sorry, I'm supposed to say to pop the balloon properly. For me, it just did not work. I didn't feel like I had chemistry or wasn't fully attracted to you and I feel like that counts if we are going to be going through a dating show, you know?

Yes, the feeling is definitely mutual He starts losing everybody it's great sassy nerd, thank you did me a favor All right, we got a pop over here Oh, if we could have your name and age and why you ended up popping your balloon. Hi, my name is Jera, I'm 22. Okay. And why did we end up popping our balloon? Um, the comment you made, uh, didn't really, I like a more humble person, not someone that

responds who, defensive-ish, yeah, that's really it. I didn't really necessarily like how you responded. That's fine, hey, I could just. All I can do is be honest. I mean, yeah, be honest. Be your authentic self. That's okay. To find a man that wasn't matching. That's the whole point. He's like, I went skydiving one time

and now my face is just kind of stuck like this. But, you know. I'd like to remind y'all that I breathe out of gills. So my time up here is limited. So if we could speed up this process That'd be great And we did get a pop balloon over here your name and age and why you ended up popping your balloon I'm Lex just staring their bodies down and I pop my balloon because I feel like you could be a tad bit

disrespectful like and I pop my balloon because I feel like you could be a tad bit disrespectful. Like how you like, I don't know, arrogant a little bit. Yes. Yeah, just that. Well, voice in my opinion is not arrogant. He goes, what does that mean? He goes, arrogant. He goes, can you use it in a sentence? What is the origin of the word?

Can I phone a friend? Spell it for me. You know, she asked me if she would be a good fit for me. If I like what I see, you know, it's contrary to the truth. Of course. After being in the wheelchair for 15 years, that's not a deal for me. That's all I'm saying.

But thank you. I just got the height surgery, so my legs are killing me. Oh shit, what is he doing? He's looking, he looks like right at her. Yeah, he's looking at every girl's body. Oh, he's horrifying, dude. My legs are killing me. Hahahaha

How you? I was 4'11 before the surgery. Hahahaha. He had that elongated surgery. The Korean surgery. Yeah, just that. Well, voice in my opinion is not arrogant, you know. She asked me if she would be a good fit for me They do not be telling you when I said the amount of pain Oh, you're going to be in on the recovery so that's all I can do is just stay what I see

I don't that's not a good look for me. That's all Queen, but uh, thank you. You did me a favor as well What I have to say is, it's not what you say. This is what I mean by what I said. It's not what you say, it's how you say it. You could have rephrased a lot of the things that you have been saying to me, as well as the other girls, differently. But that's all I have to say.

But one thing about me is I'm not gonna change who I am. I love my pigeons. I keep them up on top of that building. And I swear to God. One thing about me is that I work closely with Custom Auto. I'm just gonna tell it how it is. If you're not it, that's not it. You know, the one that is it. And you're like, bitch, you keep disrespecting me,

I'm gonna bite your ear off, all right? Respectful. And those odds against Buster Douglas were not fair he was underrated Ended up popping your balloon Briana 26 My eyes are up here, baby. Yeah, he keeps staring. Oh, yeah looking at the hair on your arms Oh wow. Oh my god. This guy. Wow. He came in hot. He's a lot smarter than we think he is. Women I deal with. As a hairless sea creature myself it's kind of a deal breaker. Being a street shark you know. Don't do too much. Hey I'm just being honest queen. Don't do too much. You know I don't like that. That's all I was looking at.

You trying to say if I'm looking at particular body parts, but that's not what it is. You just wasn't looking at my eyes. No, I was looking at the hair on your arm, queen. Anyways, she asked me the question. Yes. Um, yeah, I'm in heels and you ain't tall enough. Okay.

Don't do too much, though. Well, you're not qualified, baby. So that's all good. Baby, don't do too much. This guy rocks, dude. Okay. Why do they still have their balloons? Because he's the man, dude.

This is the type of women that they get with serial killers. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Okay. If we could have your name and age and why you ended up popping. My name is Jaclyn, I'm 25. I popped because I have hair on my arms. Jacqueline I'm 25 I popped because I have hair on my arms Hey just cuz you got hair on your arms, that's okay though queen you look phenomenal She ain't my name a wrong

I'm talking to this woman right here. Oh, well, I can look anyway. I could look anyway. I could look anyway. I'm going to You know Yeah, do you want your balloon back queen we're not talking to you sweetheart You already been already let you know. I'm not interested in you got more hair on your arms than me, baby Damn so you say get your balloon back, but I'm not gonna give my balloon back. Okay. Okay. Fuck you damn Another sexual assault for kid, okay Basically, my philosophy life is that if you just aren't into me a little bit. I hate you He goes damn so none of y'all victims want me that's crazy I hate your guts he pops their balloons with his head moving

do we still have two balloons? no okay let's go over here I can't wait to see what he says about her you sea monkey looking ass why you ended up popping my name is Kayla I'm 23 um originally I was not gonna pop my balloon cuz I know a lot of them do we have any balloons left the one? But to me, I like my man that's not gonna sit in every girl face and you know complimenting them

You know, so I didn't find that offensive to me But when they started that was gone imagine the type of woman that would get with this more. Oh, he's fucking his ass off Imagine the type of woman that would get with this more. Oh, he's fucking his ass off But I don't want my man to argue back with me because then I feel like it's gonna always be a problem That was the only reason why I popped my balloon because sounds very reasonable Yeah, you'll have a lot of luck with that Well, you were stupid bitch and I hate you and I'll kill your entire family Prefer to be very annoying all the time, but I don't like when anyone calls me When they put me through the Captain America program

Oh, she said it! What'd she say? What'd she say? To argue back with me because then I feel like it's gonna always be a problem That was the only reason why I popped my balloon because I was just like, dang But then with me you kind of got a little bit Catty with me, you a little sassy just a little bit. And since you wanna come at everybody over here,

I'm gonna get at you too. You kinda look like a Ninja Turtle. You're not a Ninja Turtle. Oh my God! Damn, you right, queens. You come back in, you're like, is that my queen? I know, is that my queen right there?

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! You need to relax. Yeah. You stocky as hell. He keeps trying to look down at their bodies for like something to say. He's like sizing up like a way a guy who's about to fight somebody. Yeah, he goes, that's okay, that's okay, queen. I hope your family dies tonight.

He's gonna get her. He's gonna own her. You think he's gonna dominate her? And I was trying to be respectful, but like you was really coming out, like I didn't like it. I'm from the South and I can handle like a lot of criticism and stuff like that, but the way you was coming, you just act like you got it all like that.

And I guarantee you probably got a roommate at home and it's just not giving anymore. Well, let me say this queen, I'm a licensed plumber. So, and I do rent. Oh, what a flex. That's so funny, cause. I'm a licensed plumber. So? And I do rec... What a flex. That's so funny, cause Ninja Turtles live in the sewer. I'm a licensed plumber, and a good comeback would be like,

I'm a licensed plumber, and every day I deal with shit like you. That would've been great. I got hit with that green toxic goo while I was down there plumbing. Yeah. I'm the toxic Avenger. It only hit my upper body. I live downtown. I live downtown. Toxic Avenger. They only hit my upper body. I live downtown. I live downtown.

I stay by myself, queen, you know, and you're not even qualified to be dealing with me. You keep saying the same thing to everybody. Definitely not. You know, if anything, it was one of these two. I wasn't even looking your way. You ain't my type. And the one that you wanted popped out of the room. If I see you, that's fine.

That's totally fine. But one thing about me, I could pull 100,000 on the bank. Can you do the same? Yeah, you can't do that. You can't do that though, baby. Yeah, let's move. Why would they break that up? This show sucks.

I mean, we've made it good, but this fucking, they're terrible at running this show. We've made it good. You know, there's like some dudes like in his neighborhood watching this shit, they're like, is that Cantavious? And they go, let's rob that motherfucker. He got a hundred thousand in the bank.

What the fuck? You guys an Ultima. You can have your name and age. Hi, I'm Esther, I'm 23. And Esther, you still have your balloon unpopped. I have no respect for myself and I hate these bitches. Oh yeah, I'm done with the rest of that. Okay, now we can talk, right?

In a real way. Okay, what do you look for? I. Okay. What do you look for? I look what are you looking for a woman like that arm? It's such a maybe that's the angle no no he's bow-legged cuz of all the fucking roids He looks like he was paralyzed for a long time in his mind. I worked his upper body up Also his other arm looks tiny, but it may be it's the angle the angle. He's also flexing the fuck out of the microphone arm. Mm-hmm. That's gonna be consistent a woman that has a career and things going for herself because I had the same thing going for myself you know as well. I

don't need a woman to give me her money. She goes well it looks like you're riding a horse and I don't like that. Oh, he's a fucking black Israelite. He goes, I worship Cthulhu. He's the one god in outer space sleeping in the dream god's head. If I start going into your Yacoubian philosophy, it's gonna be a whole other show.

Is his right arm way more jacked? No, we're just talking about that. That's what I was saying, it's the angle. It's the angle, I think. I think he's just flexing that arm. The Bible says that love is kind. Yes, certainly. Are you here for love or are you here to just insult? I'm trying

to create a family, you know, that's what I aspire to do. Okay. Yes, man. Jesus Christ, his eyes are constantly raised. I think we've had enough. Yeah, I got to get leaked. Yeah. I think we did some good work. How does it work? Phenomenal work. He just knocks the brakes off. They get matched together. It's a classic Tyson uppercut. What a dumbass. Is that OK? I think he's kind of cool. He seems kind of sweet.

I like him, actually. He seems like a chill guy. Get out of here right now. Hates arm hair. Let's step on over here. Let's step on. Step that way real quick for me. They hate this right now.

All those girls hate this. All right, so it seems like there's a little vibe here. So is it going to be a yes for you for him? God has saved souls, so yeah. Oh my god. God is a terrible person. You're a bad bitch. Leading you to him. God says save souls, so yeah. Oh my God, God is a terrible person. Damn, you're a bad bitch. Leading you to him.

You're naughty. All right folks, that was fun. I love the balloon show, and everyone subscribe to Ariette Amul. Arlette Amul. What a queen. Amulie. Oh, by the way.

Running her own business. Me and Ben Avery are doing a show again, Cringe on November 2nd. Ticket link will be in my bio on Instagram, 429tboy. Please come out, running our own business. Me and Ben Avery are doing our show again, a cringe on November 2nd. Ticket link will be in my bio on Instagram, 429tboy. Please come out and be a great show. See, you can see the biker gang. Biker gang also. It's not the same venue as it was last time.

It's a new venue and it's BYOB, so that's huge. Hell yeah. So yeah, it's gonna be awesome. Come get fucked up, have a good time. No more of that gay ass Virgil. It's this place called the Bad Ladder Studios. It's in like Hollywood proper. Yeah, it's gonna be great.

Cool, all right. Host of the show, not a big fan. Oh, and by the way, while I remember, to anybody that wants to become a patron, any new patrons, starting like November, Apple is extorting Patreon on their app, you know, channel or whatever. So if you subscribe to the Patreon, don't do it through the Patreon app.

Yeah, go to patreon.com. Go on your web browser and subscribe because if you do it on the app, it'll be like, there'll be like a 25% higher charge. They force you to use Apple Pay and then there's a massive fee. So, and this doesn't apply to current subscribers, so hey, great reason to keep your subscription absolutely but yeah I don't

know just figured to let people know because November I imagine people will be like the fuck's going on you know yeah but so keep that in mind all right God bless love you guys