Hate Watch with Devan Costa - The Death of Creampies

Episode Date: June 27, 2022

We talk about the end of Roe V. Wade and it's impact on men everywhere, why there will never be a real revolution in America and then hate watch the Elvis movie trailer made by the worst director of all time Baz Luhrmann Get weekly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/HateWatchPodcast Join the Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/hatewatchpod/ Available on all platforms. Listen on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hate-watch-with-devan-costa/id1459356319 Follow the pod on Twitter: https://twitter.com/Hate_watch_pod Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hatewatchpod/ Follow on Twitter: https://twitter.com/devancosta Follow on IG: https://www.instagram.com/devanjamescosta/

I hate you, I hate you, I don't even know you, and I hate you nuts, I hope all the bad things in life happen to you and nobody else but you. Alright. Men! Men! Men! Men! Men! Men! Men! We did it men we did it we did it hey it's a sad day for us too you know

because we have to have sex with these broads now we can't where am i gonna put my goo cream pies this is all i know i grew up on porn for christ's sake exactly if i can't watch it squirt out and then you spit it into another woman's mouth, I don't even know how to cum. What, am I going to cum in a shot glass now? What is this? Jesus, I got to cum in a condom? Who uses those?

I hate condoms. I can't cum until you're cum swapping already. You have to cum swap for me, ladies. Spit it into my mouth. I like my taste. I my my babies they're my babies my body my choice my body my choice it's my throat but then i refuse to kiss you you can spit my cum in my mouth but i will not kiss it's not it's touched a dick that's gay if my i can't do it but if the cum is in a lady's mouth it's not gay to go back into my

no no no because it's like hot and dirty and you're spitting it yeah exactly exactly if i have sex with a trans woman it's not gay because she's a woman well they're more pissed about this than women right now i know i saw a bunch of of tweets from from like they're feeling left out i don't know just from from people that look like uh they look like john goodman and they're feeling left out. I don't know. Just from, from people that look like, uh, they look like John Goodman and they're saying like, Hey, you know, don't think this is just about women. Like trans hetero,

whatever's can get pregnant too. And blah, blah, blah. I saw like a bunch of tweets like that today where they're like making it about themselves. I think it should raise their stock. Shouldn't it?

Cause you can, they're women. You can still come in and it's fine. Yeah, I guess so. Cause they, but no Jace, that's transphobic or something because but no jace that's

transphobic or something because they can get pregnant i guess maybe and the emoji can right hey 33 000 retweets bub okay so if that's not a scientific fact i don't know what is ratio is fucking 33 000 retweets and she's and the person, she, her, I don't know. It's Devin. They turned off replies and you know that's a sign of a point that really resonated with people when you have to turn off replies for fear of death threats.

I thought you guys were just mad because they took your vapes away. You go back to smoking. Oh, the jewels, the jewels that she throws away. I was joking that I'm downtown in the protest. I don't know about the abortion thing. Just protesting the jewels. I'm like, my body, my choice. They're with me.

All these women. Well, there were a lot of women for some reason. Well, they took the... Oh, fuck. We were about to put the lights on. They took the... Oh, you want me to get that real quick? Yeah.

Just talk shit on trans people? Just hit the lights. I need to look hot. They took Jules away from kids because the kids need to have better cardio when they're running from a shooter. That's the main reason. Right? Woo! Men!

Men! Men! Men! You're a big fan of the new Alexanderlexander garland movie oh yeah the crimes of the future is no no no men oh man that's excuse me alex garland alex garland yeah yeah the movie that is uh it's what we it's our it's the same it's just like oh no don't oh no you can't you can't drink the cum after you come in a mouth mustn'tn't do that. Simply joking, of course. I did like that actor in Men a lot who played all the men.

That British guy? Yeah, yeah. I haven't seen it. You saw it? Roy Kinnear. Yeah, I thought it was actually pretty good. I like Alex Garland a lot. Yeah, me too.

I like him too. He did Ex Machina, right? Yeah, he did Ex Machina and he did Annihilation, which was pretty good. Oh, I love A24 movies. That's not what the sketch was about. They're great.

I do like them too, a lot. Yeah, except when they have Pete Davidson in them. Then I don't care for them. Was he in an A24 movie? He's in a new one that's coming up. Every like fifth A24 movie, they're like, let's do Spring Breakers even though it sucked and nobody's willing to admit that. Let's remake Spring Breakers. Maybe it's Midsommar with Pete Davidson and they just

kill him. Sacrifice him. Shove him in a bear costume and then fly him into the Freedom Tower in honor of his dad. I loved Ex Machina. Ex Machina is a great movie. My only problem with it, I think I've yelled about this for years, but I don't understand the problem with making your own robots to fuck and keeping them in a cupboard. You're like, this guy's a genius. It seemed like the greatest idea I've ever heard.

What is evil about this man? They villainize Oscar Isaac because he likes to keep his women creations in a cupboard. He's trying to make a sex robot that doesn't do that face the whole time. The I'm scared face. Yeah, exactly.

And they're hot girls that don't try and be funny. They know their place. None of the robot women in that movie were doing gerbil face, which girls that don't try and be funny. They know their place. You know, none of the robot women in that movie were doing like gerbil face, which is what all hot women think is funny. Do you do gerbil face real quick? Hot women love to go like and then you're like, oh, my bone. I just don't even want to

pursue you anymore. They do the neck thing. Double chin. Aren't I goofy? Aren't I goofy, folks? It's like if you did not have a pussy, no one would talk to you. Anyway, this is a pro-woman podcast today. Joking. We're all kids. Ida's a woman.

We're just, yeah. She lives here. Ida, I'm sorry about today. I'm going to come in here tonight. Ida's at the protest looting right now. She's breaking into Beverly Hills Jewelry Stores. right now she's breaking into beverly hills ida's in the lululemon store with a uzi just going crazy i mean what is the big deal it's only been a 50 year long right i don't know yeah it was funny how quickly the Democrats sent out.

You can only show on the Democrats, but it was quickly how quickly they had their fundraising letters sent out. I think Nancy Pelosi within 15 minutes had a fundraising letter sent out, which means they had it drafted up. Yes, they knew. But they did nothing in the two months when that leak happened to try and codify it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Democrats are like, we come on. You need to vote for us. And we're like, you're in the president's a Democrat. The Democrats are like the guys at the Apple store who can't stop a shoplifter where they're just like, hey, knock it off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're like walking up to him with their arms behind their back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cut it out, buddy.

Yeah. The Democrats have a no chase policy. You're just allowed to steal Jordans. But come on. I mean, this will be better for the country. Let's be honest. Right? I mean, because it's murder.

Right. Our leaders wouldn't do anything. Sorry. Sorry. You're looking me right in the eyes. Sorry. Right, James? Come on.

Come on. Big Pharma. looking me right in the eyes. Sorry, right, James? Come on. Big Pharma! Big Pharma! Oil companies. Big Pfizer wants you to get an abortion. Exactly. Big Tech. Think about what the powers that be want. Planned Parenthood. I mean, they are a corrupt institution.

An evil organization. That has done nothing but make money on the backs of dead babies and whores. Have you ever betted to a Planned Parenthood? Yeah, I took John because he had gonorrhea. Oh, Jesus.

Good Lord. Or it may not gonorrhea. He had a really bad thing. Yeah, something from the Old West. Yeah, from when he went to Africa or whatever and he fucked, you know. Wait, really?

Yeah, he had like sex with a gazelle he got it fucked up they just they just went and and devin was like i came in john without a condom it's okay yeah you're shoving a coat hanger on john's ass we shared the same

flashlight is that a problem they're like it's okay it's probably unsanitary you're pushing the flashlight down a flight of stairs just to be safe. You're shoving a hanger up there. That's right. That is true. I mean, that's, that's, uh, women just need to, you know, remember when you're marching

out there to march up and down some stairs, maybe trip because that's your last hope because it's over. Start smoking a lot. It's over ladies. It's over. You got to keep my baby. And I hate kids, but i just love the idea of putting that burden on you and i'll be i'll abandon them i'll be out of the house in in 12 months

what is it big pharma you just love the idea of trapping a woman for 20 years yes come on what do you have hopes and dreams raise my kid and I'll come back when he's 18 and I'll fucking get him in the NBA. Just say I'm Sam Warren Hustle. Yeah, that's me. Big old basketball shorts. It was pretty good. I haven't seen it, but I heard a lot of people liked it. It's good.

It's good. Yeah. It also shows just how decimated American basketball is because the whole movie is him looking for the next big thing in Portugal. Which is kind of true now. It's very true. In the movie, the 76ers

are like, you need to find me the next big thing. Instead of going to colleges and looking at young black American kids or white kids from America, he's like, in China. I'll find you something. I think about this guy named Bad Bunny. He's like, in China. Like, I'll find you something. Like, you know, I just thought, this guy named Bad Bunny, he has a pretty good jump shot.

I need you to find a light-skinned Chinese guy. Stat. You know who this country could use more than ever right now, James? Who's that? Jake Novak. Jake Novak, that's true. We need another Novak song.

You know, he's on the bus from 8 Mile right now, just riding up a storm. Packed in the skodas, hocus pocus, and they acting bogus. That's an awfully hot coffee pot. Fuck, now that's been done. Shit. Children dying in schools. Women having kids.

Can you imagine him in the rap battle from the end of 8 Mile? Oh, that'd be the best thing to ever view. That'd be a funny bit. That'd be a great bit. He tries to get the crowd bouncing, and they just all just kill him. Just punch him. Everybody from the 313. You know, I did a little, put your hands up if you follow me.

Yeah, and yeah, that guy fucked my mom. Since we did our last episode, I can't stop thinking about that guy yeah i can't get uh like lemon branda damn like i can't get that out of my mind it's he's actually the kind of a genius it's very catchy i i've had like 18 conversations about jake novak since we've we've done that everybody is, I'm talking about Novak all over town. I got Novak fever. The whole damn country. I'm going to try to tear his clothes off if I see him getting out of a car. It's like Beatlemania.

Just teenage girls. Novak, Novak, Novak. But they're kicking his ass too. I forgot that he even had them on YouTube. So the other day I went to his YouTube just to look at the comments. Oh, yeah. Okay. This will be good.

Check these out. The first comment, 95 likes. It's honestly sad. You don't have friends in your life who care about you enough to stop you from doing this. That's the best is when you get like a really earnest comment it's just like dude you don't have to do this man don't do this please yeah please just get a slack job

just please get a fake tech job dude this guy goes returning again today because I wasn't sure if this was part of some dark terrifying fever dream dot dot dot but no it's real hey Jake I usually don't comment on youtube videos but i felt compelled to in this case i like a lot of singing videos especially the lonely island but

i don't think you should pursue this to put it bluntly and perhaps rudely though i have no intention of hurting your feelings this video put me in a really bad frame of mind. They're so earnest. Yeah. And it is funny that everybody, they hate it so much they can't even be mean. They're not even,

yeah, they're just like, dude. Because they know there's no actual fans of this. Exactly. At all. Exactly.

They're not, yeah, they're not like fighting against people that love it. No. So then, they're like taking a deep breath and editing.

They're like, if I say that, I'm going to get seen as a bully. I'm going to delete that. They're giving criticisms like they're his grandma or something. Yeah, like, honey, I just think you should get a trade. Just him at Thanksgiving. So how are the songs going? How are your skits? So then the other day, I posted the clip of us saying that he should be skinned alive at the Legion of Skanks.

Which I think is fair. And this guy quote tweeted it. And he goes, I laughed so, I was in a Starbucks and I started dying laughing. And I felt bad, but I'm also like, I just writing this sentence about a grown man is so funny. The hate on social media makes me sick to my stomach. Jake Novak is one of my best friends. I grew up with him and have known him since I was four to see somebody. Hope joke.

He is skinned alive. It's beyond comprehensive. We don't need hate. We need love. He wrote to see somebody. Hope joke. He is skinned alive. He wrote to see somebody hope joke.

He is skinned alive. You know what the Haywatch podcast needs more of? Less hate. Less hate. More hope. We're really about just getting people into good stuff. Yeah. No.

Yeah. But that's just such a funny thing for an adult to write. Like, I can't believe people want him skinned alive. I mean, can you imagine? It's obviously an absurd joke for me. Yeah, I mean, the fact that he wrote it out like that is like, you have to know this is a little bit funny. Come on, dude.

I couldn't help but laugh. Like that you actually are like, no, dude, I truly believe he should be held down and the skin should be ripped from his flesh. Right, like I'm on this like rampage. No, he should be skinned alive. If you were made the press, you're like my first act. We skin Jake Novak on the Masked Singer.

So everybody can watch. I want to like the Merchant of Venice. I want a court to approve it. I don't know the reference. I want my pound of flesh. Oh, there we go. There we go. Yeah, they should kill him like the fat guy in seven.

Yeah, they should make him eat the fat guy in seven yeah they should make him eat his own body well i guess uh the people they hate democrats you know this is the call them fucking useless uh i guess because they did a lot today they came out and they sang god bless america that's still about jewels which why why would they sing god bless america he he doesn't want abortions right right you listen to the catholic church and everything wow good point yeah seriously i mean do you not listen you know i always had a feeling christianity would be a problem who would have thought that come back to bite us and ask that pretending that we're a christian nation would really screw us who would have thought the writings of sheep farmers from 3,000 years ago

would come back to bite us in the ass? Yeah, they didn't worry about having kids because sheep can't have them. Can you imagine like, walk up to the historical Jesus, who had no powers, most likely, and just be like, just so you know, this is going to fuck up everything 2,000 years from now. Same as the founding fathers writing, like, you know, like

you can't take guns and certain shit like that. They're like, you know, they didn't think that one day there'd be guys with bazookas and subway yeah if you brought benjamin franklin to today he would just fuck trans girls constantly that's all he would do you're right yeah he'd see like the little like cat videos and stuff he'd be like my god they'd see like nba players and they'd be like, oh my God. We've got to stop breeding them. He'd be like, who let them out? Think about how much corn they could pick. Bushels and

bushels of sweet, sweet corn. You could be Franklin and be like, wanna fuck Dwayne Wade? Look at how high they could, we could grow grapefruit and they could grab it from the trees. He'd be like, look at Dwayne Wade's hot daughter. What a piece of ass. Yeah, Thomas Jefferson would love the current NBA.

Yeah. He'd just be sucking and fucking. Oh, yeah. You show him the Real Housewives of Atlanta, he'd just lose his damn mind. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He was the one who fucked all the slaves, right? Yeah, Thomas Jefferson. Yeah, yeah.

He'd think the WNBA is like, did I start this? These are all of your descendants, Mr. Jefferson. How bad of a thing is this? It just means like that they have to take a plane trip to go get. Yeah, it's I think about killed. Right. It's good. That's that's that's good.

Down to brass tacks. Yeah, it's good. Down to brass tacks. down to brass tacks yeah let's get down to brass tacks no it sucks like we should not be able to have abortions i'd have an heartbeat if i was gonna have the same kid right yeah yeah but you know yeah but it is like kind of murder but like not but kind of you know what i mean yeah i i tell i'm not the p i'm not the people who are like you get 20 abortions a year get them all flush them out not into that like where it gets overly like you know, liberal and they're like, I think I might have

an abortion for fun. Right. That type of shit. People who tweet like, I just got an abortion. I'm going to go get ice cream. And it's like, no, you should listen

to Benfold Brick and feel bad about it. You should go home and listen to Mazzy Star and stare at the wall, you sick cunt. I think you need to light some candles and listen to into the dust yeah fade into you woodstock 94 great live version listen to it

yeah but you're also not you know i'm always like you know i'm just like a don't tread on me guy but for like everything like just do whatever the fuck you want as long as it doesn't impede on somebody else so to have somebody's rights taken away i think like 20 states are not going to have abortions so if you have the money you could just go to another state but right the issue is more like poor people i guess who can't afford but they're not like getting abortions anyway the poor people are the ones who have they just have the poor people have kids for help right they don't look at them as having a kid they look at it as like getting some fucking help around yeah they're the people who like know exactly how much like tax money you get paid per kid that you have right right yeah like we'll just fucking feed them

kool-aid mac and cheese we can we can afford that we can have 10 300-pound children. Yeah. And I know this is like, I'm kind of being facetious here, but this is horrible. And now it's interesting to see the other side. I mean, come on, man. At what point should people start fucking lopping heads off? Yeah, just killing people. Killing politicians. I was thinking that today because you see

all these fucking guys who just weigh 80 pounds tweeting they're going to kill a senator. It's like, please actually do it. Exactly, but they all had to be sucked into pretending that January 6th was the worst thing to ever happen and we overly demonized

that and now what if there's a reasonable reason to storm the capital you can't do it can't do it now because it goes against everything you fucking fake you know believed in about that because they that they let those fucking guys in on january 6th they let that get worse than it had to be yeah so they could use it to make now if you now if if if uh the good side wants to fucking uh storm the capitol and kill some politicians because they're fucking our lives up right now you're just like uh the you're just like the q anon shaman yeah no i wanted to tweet today it would have just been more hassle but it's like are these the people

you know these are the same people you wanted to protect in january 6 so much yeah no it's just just because like oh don't hurt mitch mcconnell yeah not nancy pelosi all right yeah all these people should be killed exactly they should be fuck i tweeted yeah the same thing i was like you know the january 6 committee needs to ensure the safety of nancy pelosi mitch mcconnell and all other hard-working americans working to you know improve our lives like every day not not only did the democrats not even try to codify roe v wade they actually signed extra protection for scotus judges when that memo when that draft leaked so nobody would be harmed what was this what did you say so the the the either the senate or or the representatives i don't know which they signed like a new like hey the scotus gets this

much more for security like double down on keeping them safe because people were threatening their lives after the leak that this decision was coming to overturn Roe v. Wade. Yeah. Well, also a guy did go to Brett Kavanaugh's house and try to kill him. Which the media did not cover at all.

Really? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it was barely covered because it was a Democrat. It was a very liberal. Right. Very liberal person went to go kill Brett Kavanaugh. Media did not cover it at all. And that guy should be celebrated. Yeah.

We should have a parade. I love that, too. I don't you know, I'm for everybody stalking all politicians. This is the problem with Democrats is he got there and he said, like, I think this would bring meeting meaning to my life to kill Brett Kavanaugh. And then he got scared and called the cops on himself. What a liberal fucking cuck. God, really? He did that?

He called the cops on himself. He's probably fucking wearing a mask not to hide his identity. He didn't want to get COVID from Kavanaugh. I was going to go in and kill him, but I was too afraid of getting raped by that rapist.

He raped Christine Blasey Ford, and he's going to rape me. People were posting his address online today, Brett Kavanaugh's. Great. Yeah. I love that. Yeah, whatever. I love that, too. I want to have a beer with a cool guy.

You just slowly torture him. I just show up. I'm like, dude, where are the babes? Where are the brewskis? You're doing funny games with Brett Kavanaugh? You know, I like a beer, Brett. Just tie it up and all bound. It's weird being in California where this shit really doesn't affect us.

Right. Which is, you know, it's like, listen, you know, like we have to let a homeless person in to sleep in our house once a month or whatever, but we don't have to worry about coming in women. There's some upsides here. There's free medical if you're poor. You can get EBT really easily. We're not going to ban abortion. We'll never ban abortion, but you get a gun pointed at you coming home from Topp.

Where are you going to go after the casting couch if there's no abortion clinics here? You could come in a homeless person if you want. You're fine. Yeah. Yeah. We just, you know, they're going to ban abortion in Hollywood or something. Like, I don't know. Yeah.

And it is funny to see all the people we know protesting, you know. Yeah. Not that I'm anti-protesting. It's just like, wait, you're backing up the 405. every single one of these people agrees with you yeah you don't need to protest out here yeah you need to fly to alabama plane yeah get on your skull cracked in trying to protest a little like pig trail road well also the only people that probably disagree with you in la they're fighting also endlessly to keep here and not get deported or right and like that because a lot of mexican people are very oh yeah i mean yeah the catholics

so anti-abortion very anti-abortion yeah for that that reason they vote republican a lot of the time yep so there you go maybe you shouldn't save that guy who works at the fruit stand i'm only protesting guys who work at the fruit stand. It is. It is funny that. Yeah, there we remember these people. Yes, sure. Oh, yeah. Who also came at you recently. Yeah, it came at me recently. Yeah.

Oh, let's get into that a little bit. All these people who. Well, it's not. No, it's not name any. No, no, no. It didn't. I just we've I've wanted to talk to you about this for weeks. Sure.

We always have too much fun. So it's time to bog down the show no but this was a fucking great drawing you did and a great point you made and uh you got like people just played it right into it yeah people really dragged me for this one but not really they showed their they they were the point of this. The drawing is Adam Conover from the show Adam Ruins Everything. He has a show on Netflix produced by Obama

where they tell you about the government done by the government. Who I cattily drew a little fatter than he actually is. You should. I added a little extra neck. Adam K. Ultra. And he goes, don't forget to vote for everything i want you to vote for i think your vote is is is important as long as your viewpoint is the exact same as mine the democratic process should operate according to everything i believe all the time on

everything i should be the god of all society which is so perfect because every year around voting season especially in fucking la um it's it's people uh posting like hey i did the research for you guys just vote for this like here and if you haven't had time i know you work hard just this is the right these are the right people and these are the wrong people and it's like how do you know it's opinion it's opinion based right like so I've always thought that where I'm like, what are you talking about? Well, they'll also be like,

Hey, for the ninth count, like all this stuff, nobody researched the wig for the ninth council. You got to like nominate Nithya Ramadan. Yeah. You, and then nine months later,

they're like, uh, Nithya Ramadan has unfortunately endorsed the Nazi party in Los Angeles. No, it's literally your choice is always like, you got to vote for like a billionaire that has like 30 rapes on his record or a lady that runs a taco stand right who thinks that homeless people should be allowed to enter your home and well that was my whole whole point i'm not even vote it was about

rick caruso because everybody was going on about that i'm not even voting for rick caruso no me neither i don't know but i don't know it is funny for people to be like, you can't vote for this guy. Because he's a billionaire. Because he's a billionaire who literally his opinion is, there's unclaimed land on LA. I'm going to build a lot of houses and we're going to make the homeless people live there. That's literally his point. And that might not happen. He's a

politician. Probably won't. He'll kill them all. He'll kill them all. Whatever. But that's what he's saying. So how are you getting this that he's definitely not going to do that? Versus Karen Bass, who they say you should elect, who's like, Karen Bass has let this problem go on and get worse for the last 20 years. Yes. She has a record of doing like nothing about this.

Yeah, right. We should vote for her instead. She's changed the conversation from homeless to houseless neighbors. Right. All right. And the people that this drawing is about all of them showed themselves in your comments they were just like hey yeah this is me yeah this sucks like it was really like i saw the i saw the comments that were like you know they weren't like super mean

the people that we kind of know vaguely sure but they were like this isn't the one dude kind of weird to choose the opinion of a billionaire over a comic hey no it isn't you fucking loser it's not actually because this comic is a comic he's a loser and a billionaire did way more things to somehow become a billionaire way more like like impressive things yeah it's also funny to just get mad at a drawing it's like just how much does your life suck also funny to just get mad at a drawing. It's like just how much does your wife suck? Yeah, but I just thought that I mean it was it was that was an amazing day watching watching the discourse online.

I mean, there's there's some there's some big names too that had a problem with it. I don't want to get into because I like them and I think they're very talented, but we won't even mention, but it is funny like my, you know, my parents will be like you still do a copy. I'm like no, but people on TV shows are very angry at me. People whose dreams came true do not like me. And they'll never help me out.

They're actually changing the locks of Hollywood right now for you. That's what they're willing to do for you. No, but people who get checks from billion-dollar corporations do not like my little drawings. That's what I tell my parents. I go like, no, things are going good. I have have a couple friends they work for hbo they flew me out they fed me hummus they cut me from the show it's great things are going great it's great everyone i have a beef with is doing tremendously and everyone i'm a close ally with is living in

in a shoe downtown fuck yeah but i just Yeah. But I just thought, I mean, this was the perfect summation of just the culture war, basically. Right, sure. That is instilled on us every fucking day. And people play into it. And the comments were people playing into it. These people were,

this is a bipartisan drawing. Like, this doesn't have a side. Right. You're making just a thoughtful point, and people go, but it attacks my side, and we're obviously the only one that matters. Well, and you know what's so frustrating? The next day, I posted, just to make it even, I posted an anti-Republican drawing, and then the exact opposite.

All the people who loved me yesterday were like, like dude you're a cuck fag yeah i swear to god like 14 year olds with like little their accounts are just pepe smoking cigarettes and they're like uh cringe much fag and i was just like all right i don't think this i'm gonna take a couple weeks off you called it perfectly what do you call you? You call it dog brain. You see them black and white. It's like they're, you know, they have like no memories. No memories at all. No memory whatsoever. Live moment to moment. Yeah, they're like, they are like just a big, dumb, retarded

dog. Just a big, dumb dog. Chained in a yard. Just barking at anything that gets close to it. Yeah. I don't know, but I thought that, I love that drawing and I, I i mean we used to kind of we used to know this guy yeah he was a dick to everybody he was a fucking pompous douche at open mics he hosted open mics he would wear a suit at every open mic and we'd we'd all be like what is this what do you mean the great gatsby you retard we're at a fucking bar

like at 5 p.m. Nobody wants us to be here. The owner is making a very bad decision by wanting this to happen. He made just nothing but bad decisions. It led to nothing. And now he's hosting the White House Correspondents. Whatever he does. He's best friends with Obama.

He's having dinner with the Obamas. What are you, an idiot? You're a failure. Truly, we've made every wrong decision even that i don't know he was like nice to me when i first started but it was it was just interesting because he was the last guy that i would assume like would have gone on to be like on the side of buses and bus stops and shit and then it's stupid face just another one of those you know when you do comedy where you're just like it starts to make everything feel like a fucking uh a um a simulation where you're like what yeah you start looking around you're like that guy's like world famous now right it's almost like at

some point they're gonna take the vr glasses off of you and you're just in a prison then you forgot you're like you're just being punished yeah. You're like in those Black Mirror episodes where they make time go really slow for the little digital you. That's what it feels like. Yeah, you're just with you and Jon Hamm, and you're admitting to being a pedophile or something, but they're forcing you to do open mic comedy for years

and watch everyone who didn't like you succeed. Yeah. Behind your wildest dreams. Yeah, and you're just going like, stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! seed yeah to haunt your wildest and you're just you're just you're just going like it's just you driving home from work like maybe i could get a job in weed or something that'd be a good job and then you you drive past a guy who told you you're racist just out on a bus he's on a bus stop he's doing a show for a guy who drone killed 40,000 Muslim children. What hell am I living inside?

There's a bunch of guys in lab coats who are like, this is subject number 170. We made him a failing comedian. Very funny. We gave him all the skills necessary to do it. Unfortunately, none of the relationship aspects are coming through. He doesn't know how to be friendly. The worst punishment they give to any criminal you had to be the guy who butchered like 40 children like john wangasey

they're like make him an open mic comedian for life for life it just really is amazing though like that like it never changes like when you made that drawing i was like great that's perfect and i i i assume like because you're very um you're nuanced you're nuanced and and and but also like the the people that like you we know i know them all too and most comics really like most comics like you no exactly so like i was i saw that i was like what what is the other side gonna say to this because it's good it's honest and it's real right and they just played right into it like immediately and i was like god you fucking people never learn anything it's unbelievable you're the you are the point of this and you're in the comments like hey this is about

me right fuck you yeah i think i even post on instagram if you got mad at the drawing you prove the point you prove the point yeah well because somehow there's this mentality that's been created where you get to be like it's not helping okay i know that you don't think this i know that you're a good guy right but it's not helping yeah and everybody's definition of help just comes from sharing stories on instagram i even saw people today like like, hey, take note of your male friends who are silent today. Note that. It's like, oh, I'm sorry. I couldn't help with an Instagram story.

Yeah, what does silent mean? Yeah. Do you think this is Captain Planet? Like this has some power or something? I'm sorry to break into all of you, but you'll never change anything ever with anything you do. Not a single move unless you get into politics, work within it for 25 fucking years, and then you just refuse to let bills be passed, and you're just this big fucking asshole that refuses to let you do what they want,

and then they'll kill you. Yeah, then there's a new group of 20-year-olds who think you're a piece of shit. And then you're an asshole to the 20 year olds. How about this? The only way you'll make change is if you bazooka the White House. How about that? But you'll never do that

because you're a fraud! You're a pussy! And you love Chick-fil-A! And the AMC theater! And you love going to the mall! And you like going to zara and it doesn't really matter to you yeah you're in all of caruso's establishment you are you love caruso all you do is fucking you love you tweet about the gallery you tweet about the americana all damn day how about that unless you put on a mask and you arm yourself and you take to the streets

violently and it's not like antifa versus maga hats right you'll never do anything with your little post so don't act like like anything matters of somebody tweeting something on twitter or instagramming like here's a great organization that helps with this join this join that like because then you'll donate you'll donate and then like two years later they're like oh the way, the owner bought six mansions. Yes. I was literally today about to be like, this is a horrible day. Support BLM.

Because it doesn't fucking matter. They're all the fucking same thing. Nothing will ever fucking change. They proved that to us and they showed us that when they fucking took off Kennedy's head in broad daylight, you retards. It's over. It is over. The only guy that ever wanted to do anything had his head exploded like a watermelon

in broad daylight and his wife was trying to shove his brains back in his skull. Yeah. And then his brother tried to pick up the torch. And then they killed him. A waiter killed him. They had a waiter kill him.

It's ridiculous. So everything you do is for show. Right. And just either just shut the fuck up and have my baby. And take my goo.

Take my goddamn goo. No, it's a sad day. Bad day. For black people. This is a horrible day for black people. Yeah. The guy that is, he's lost with what, who to care about. Guy's like, oh my, you know, black people, they've been at a deficit their whole lives.

They're like, no, today's about women. Yeah, yeah. I have seen some people be like listen this is a bill that targets black people specifically it's like what are you what are you saying about that you saw that today i've seen that in the past i don't know if i've seen it today because i try to say sure but i've seen people be like listen we all know black people just are affected most by this because they just don't know how to have safe sex because they're retards my favorite thing is when every year there's,

or every voting season or whatever, there's always this big thing where it's like, listen, black people just don't know how to vote. They don't know where to go. Like they just, where liberals will just treat black people like they're like mentally challenged.

Like they're just, they're just like walking into walls, like a glitch in a video game. They're like, I was trying to find the library, but it turns out I'm at the city hall. They're like, guys, we gotta

find a short bus to pick these guys up and take them to the polls. Give them a crown, let them fill in the ballot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Liberals are like, listen, we can fix this. We need to bus them. I just don't even, I don't know. I mean, they literally think so low of it. They're like, do you realize if you make them get IDs how much it'll hold them up?

They don't know how to do that shit. Yeah, right. They're like, they can't get IDs. They don't have cars. Okay, are you kidding me? You think it's okay to have black people get IDs? You know when they take their picture, the light is white. A big flash of white at them, and you want to put them

through that? These black people can't get IDs to vote. Are you kidding me? You want them to go to the DMV? There's black women there who are mean. They work at the DMV. They don't use the services, you fucking asshole. They don't know how to do that shit.

Liberals will be like, the black people can't vote. They're too busy eating welfare. We need to make it easier for them because they're applying for welfare the day of voting. Just no idea how insanely racist they sound. That's an example of something. Not me. God damn it.

Can't say anything these days. Oh, man, we've really entered the... It's hot in here. Yeah, we've entered the no-spin zone. We're doing exactly what everyone thinks podcasters do. This is the fucking podcast. This is the new racist podcast.

I want everyone to know I grew up... My dad and I, we're Green Party people. We're big, like, vote for Ralph Nader. Yeah, you guys were Nader guys. And everything got so fucked up and crazy. I have no clue what's happening anymore. Yeah.

But also, just know I have many black friends. Everyone's okay with me. Devin saw the movie Hustle. He's fine. I loved Hustle. He knows what the DL means. Anyway,

I guess we should switch. I don't know. Yeah, it's hard to be funny about. It's not funny, but I tried to make it funny by being insane. It's all for show. I really don't care about anything. You know what I'm upset about is this Elvis movie, goddammit.

Have you seen this fucking Elvis movie? Yeah, it looks like a real piece of shit. What a hunk of shit. Baz Luhrmann is just successful Jake Novak. He's just large-scale Novak. He's like, what if we made the shittiest movie there's ever been? All this guy does is ruin incredible stories

and incredible... Just blows layups. That's all this guy ever does. Great Gatsby yeah was like had jay-z playing in the fucking 20s that idiot i hate him moulin rouge sucks i remember every adult loved moulin rouge and then i watched it like five years i'm like oh this is the dumbest thing i've ever seen terrible it's god awful terrible so let's watch the trailer yeah go for the trailer for the elvis movie

but baz luhrmann baz luhrmann his big his big thing i had a friend just watched this movie yesterday he said it was a real just the biggest in a fun way the biggest piece of shit you've ever seen i don't think he's ever made a good movie no i don't think he has i don't know why he keeps even like romeo and juliet you watch that're like, this is just stupid. It's just dumb. Yeah. The Great Gatsby had modern rap music playing and it's the 20s and it's just terrible. There's like, it's just this musical bullshit. I know. It's like, I wish there was a genre from the 20s to pull from, like the best jazz ever made.

All right. Okay. Here we go. Here we go. By Warner Brothers. All right. That's a fun t-shirt okay that's great here we go folks easy our country itself is sick but it's lost its sense of direction even its common decency you don't so much as wiggle the fingers

Even it's common decency. You don't so much as wiggle the fingers. There's a lot of people saying a lot of things. But in the end, you gotta listen to yourself. Oh, yeah. In that moment... Elvis wasn't emo. ...with sacrifice. What?

And Elvis the God was born. Was Tom Hanks? moment with sacrifice what and elvis the god tom hanks tom hanks is probably the best part of this movie yeah you're looking for trouble oh my god to the right place look at the trouble okay first off when was elvis conceived by filipino people it's like five two what did el was elvis born in a jolly bee why is he filipino in this movie they're just like make him as the gayest man who ever lived what is going on? And also, what is Tom Hanks in this movie? He plays the Colonel Parker, who is Elvis' manager. Found him, discovered him.

This guy looks like George Lucas, who's a big goiter. Discovered Elvis. Fuck off. This looks like a hunk of shit. This looks like it's... Baz Luhrmann making this movie is Elvis' punishment for stealing from black

people this is so bad I'm gonna make him look like he's in My Chemical Romance yeah what is Elvis in Panic at the Disco he had no idea what he had done you

ain't nothing but a dog player oh my god Oh my God. Who the hell is that? It's 21 Savage. They remixed Hound Dog? Hey, remember when Elvis wrote WAP? Yeah, just I was like, well, I think we need to make a song with Megan Thee Stallion. And somebody get Megan's big fat ass on the stage. You got nothing but a wet ass pussy.

And I want a fucking wet ass pussy. It's also funny i watched a couple trailers and the whole time they're trying to make elvis be like you don't understand elvis was like like hip with the black he was going to the black church in the beginning of the movie and stuff like as a kid yeah and it's like it's literally like elvis would be like listen just don't give them the right to vote like that guy's singing dance but don't let him vote now here's the one thing i don't quite know about elvis like because i grew up my mom like loved elvis we went we did a big southern road trip we went to graceland and uh i grew up respecting elvis sure and i thought he was like great and i thought he really respected the black community and black artists that he uh sampled from or whatever the fuck took from

that was the whole like the tour really made a point of that that he was very he's very generous guy to people but i guess is that false like to black people like he was like a piece of shit i know i mean i don't think i know like public enemy went at him and all that, but I'm like, is that true though? I thought Elvis was actually pretty cool with black people that he came up with. Not black people now. They hate him and they think he's an example of like white, you know, stealing from black culture. Yeah, I don't know.

I don't know if he went out his way to like help the black community, but he was just like a Southern, you know, like dipshit idiot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Towards the end of his life, he's a complete retard. Yeah, he was like completely idiotic there's one karate like jumping into room no literally like there's one story of him uh towards the end of his life he thought he had developed telekinesis and he had he always had this like crew crew of like big dumb southern idiots with him who were just like collecting a paycheck they're like shut dang elvis you got it

buddy and there was one time he he uh they were were driving back to Graceland in a Cadillac. And Elvis was like, hey, stop the car, man. And he goes, you see that cloud off in the distance? He's going, I'm going to move that with my mind. And then five grown men just watched Elvis do this, hold his hand to his temple. And then the cloud just slowly blew like it normally would. And they all had to go like wow damn elvis i'm scared now

that's crazy you're god elvis anyway can i get my paycheck eat this sandwich full of bananas and yeah and barbiturates peanut butter sandwich yeah no it's fine that there's 40 pounds of impacted feces inside of you you big dumb he couldn't shit that was the that was the rumor that when they did his autopsy there was 40 pounds of impacted shit everyone says he died on the toilet yeah which is true he literally tried to shit really bad he took a bunch of laxative because he wasn't shitting for like weeks and uh he had a heart attack on the toilet and died you didn't know that i know he had a heart attack on the toilet and died. You didn't know that? I knew he had a heart attack on the toilet.

I didn't know it was because he was fucking constipated. Yeah, yeah. He was just taking fistfuls of pills and eating his stupid fried peanut butter sandwiches. So do the pills make you constipated or the type of food? Yeah, barbiturate. Yeah, opiates. They make it so you can't shit? Yeah.

But I thought heroin addicts always like evacuate like everything at once. Once they detox, they just shit themselves. Shit like a Coke can out. but i thought heroin addicts always like evacuate like everything at once so at once they once they detox they just shit themselves like a coke can out yeah okay interesting fuck yeah because it uh it uh it it it's a downer so your your your your guts are just like you gotta ask big pharma john about that i don't know your large intestine is just like we're not you gotta ask you gotta ask big farm john about that i don't know your large intestine is just like hi like that's john sack i'm not doing shit man you're calling like i can't shit i got grateful dead tickets man your sphincter's too busy if i can listen into the kinks yeah you're calling has a big headband on watching dumb ass like Cheech and Chong movies. Hey, this is the best comedy man talking about weed.

So he was taking essentially like synthetic like heroin, like like like he was taking like oxy basically. Yeah, he was just taking like all the I mean, all those celebrities back then they had a doctor feel good who would just like just give them anything. I mean, fucking they took a lot of Nembutal was what they would take. Nembutal. Yeah, Nembutol. Kennedy was just chewing fistfuls of painkillers, and he was on meth.

Like, all those guys were on meth back then. Yeah, they were doing it all. A lot of Dexedrine. Yeah, Dexedrine. Yeah, which is like. That was the big one back then. Which is like early Adderall, right? Yeah, yeah.

It was a diet pill. You could get it. It's a lot better than Adderall. Oh, yeah. Wasn't that Mommy's Little Helper? That literally is. Mother's Little Helper. Mother's Little Helper, yeah. You used to be. You could get it over the counter. Nazis better than Adderall. Oh, yeah. Wasn't that Mommy's Little Helper? That literally is Mommy's Little Helper.

Yeah. Mommy's Little Helper. Yeah. Yeah. You used to be. You could get it over the counter. Nazis did it all the time. Yeah. Yeah.

Look how they turned out. Got a lot done. There's a clip. Got a lot done. There's a clip of Hitler at the Jesse Owens Olympics, and he's just methed out of his fucking mind. Yeah. Just like tapping his foot and like scratching his neck and shit.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that could have been because he was. Jesse Owens was black, right? He was just outraged. Oh, God. Should we finish this fucking trailer?

Yeah, sure. Please go back to it. Goddamn, I got to shit. The whole movie is him shitting. Yeah, it's like Osmosis Jones. Told from the lens of Elvis' shit. Elvis is like, I can eat that egg off the zoo. I'm a zookeeper now.

All the dancing is just him trying to get his shit out and move his shit around. A little Chris Rock germ inside of him. Oh, fuck. Just going like, I don't want to be inside no white boy. Fucking love Osmosis Jones. Fucking love all those shots. I love that movie. Since my baby left me, I haven't been able to shit. Hey, baby, I'm backed up.

Hey, baby. Hey, baby. How about you let me treat your chest like a toilet, baby? Hey, yo, titty milk got any fiber in it? Come here, baby, for you. It would be for nothing. Trust me. There's been a lot of talk about the new Elvis.

I also love they can't let him be fat. No, they don't show him being fat at all they make him hot did Elvis wear mascara? yeah he looks like he's Batman did he wear it? like what is this? if you dream it you'll do it

I've never met anyone like you I hope not. Without me, there would be no Elvis Presley. Everyone's told me that things are too dangerous to say. Hold on! Sing. Ladies and gentlemen, here's Elvis Presley.

He calls out love too much, baby. Ugh. This ain't no nostalgia show. We're gonna do something different. I'm going to predict the weather, baby. We're going to do a little something different today, baby. Hey, that China man taught me a little karate earlier. He goes, watch me cut these.

Watch me cut the clouds and hair, baby. Yeah! Who needs a dopp clouds in half, baby? Woo! Yeah! Who needs a double kicker, baby? Dallas rains more like it was presently, baby. I had a twin I ate in the womb. That's what gives me my strength. They call me the weatherman, baby. Johnny Mountain more like it was

presently, baby. Just a psychopath. Just a fucking psychopath fucking injecting fried chicken into his veins living in an insane mansion in the south oh man yeah it's great i mean it's it is it's so funny how it's just walk hard like it's they made a serious walk hard yeah yeah like elvis going to be playing catch with his 5,000 children. It's just more so

upsetting because he does deserve a real movie made about him. He's great. He is. He's an icon. I love his music. I'm sorry. I don't know about the black stuff. It's always funny with those guys. They're like, he actually stole that song from Blind blind lemon jefferson and then you listen to like uh don't like don't be cruel from 1937 so i can don't be cruel your love is there's no instruments and it's like you

know it's fine like the guy came up with the chorus and stuff but it's like can blind lemon jefferson shake his hips do I want to fuck blind Lemon Jefferson? Hey, cold was the night, hard was the ground. How about you shake your dick around, buddy? Yeah, he's like, of course he got stolen from me. He's fucking blind. He's a blind idiot. He's a blind doofus. How about you see

blind Lemon Jefferson? Dummy. Hey, Robert Johnson, you know what you should have sold your soul for a little hip movement get that coccyx moving i mean i'm gonna do a deep dive on this after the show because i'm not sure that he's he should be as villainized as he is by the black community i always i mean when i did that tour and uh we went to Beale Street, and we went to Sun Records, and they made a huge... I mean, maybe it's just damage control, I guess, but there was a huge point made

of how generous and philanthropic he was to black people. See, I don't even know. I mean, I was just trying to do a bit earlier. No, I don't know either, but all I know is that public enemy hates him, and black people generally think Elvis is just scum and stole from black people, and rode off the backs of them and i'm

like i always you know because i love black but i'm like yeah yeah okay yeah and even public enemy doing that that was more just a statement than anything like who's your greatest hero fuck that guy yeah yeah and i get that it's like that scene in repo man you remember have you ever seen that where the guy just walks up to those construction workers he's like john wayne was a faggot he's a cock sucking faggot i fucking forgot i was doing a podcast for a second you're quoting a movie no i know i know but i just suddenly just snapped to me this is being filmed hey ordinary fucking people right ordinary fucking ordinary fucking people i need to re-watch that one look at those people ordinary fucking people i hate them

maybe the hardest i've ever laughed because i was like harry dean stanton right harry dean stanton i had no idea paris texas you ever seen paris texas i love paris texas that is a beautiful movie just a unbelievable movie a Just an unbelievable movie. A fantastic movie. Gorgeous, beautiful thoughtful movie. That director made some other good stuff like Wings of Desire and stuff like that. Yeah, Wim's Wenders? Wim's Wenders? I don't know, some German idiot.

Get back to your brothel, you sausage-eating crap. We love your movies, but fucking get away. I don't care about your name. Get back to your Hitler country, moron. I love when Germans try to speak. You're responsible for the worst guy ever. Right.

Anytime I've been talking to a German, they're just like, oh, yeah, the country is very beautiful. I'm just like Hitler, Hitler, Hitler. You guys killed the Jews. If I were to go to Germany, I don't know how I would go anywhere without being like, so like, I mean, why'd you guys let that happen? That's crazy. Yeah. I'd be driving on the Autobahn just like, man, you could kill a lot of Jews with this

thing. No backbone. You guys have no backbone. Couldn't stand up to anything. I had a German professor in college. He was a very nice guy, but he was like, he was just like, so the thing is, and he taught accounting and he just would always talk about, he's like, yeah, from Germany was very good. And then halfway through the class, there was just like a down class and so it's like so what

like what was it like growing up in germany's like my grandfather did unspeakable things that he would i remember one time he never talked about it but i went to my grandpapa and i said what did you do in the war and he left for three weeks and he came back covered in the drink reeking of it and I'm just in the bag going woo oh man it is even funny going to like Red Wine

which is a German themed bar German themed bar all German food and you eat it you have a good time and you're like but this was a part of it's like going to a confeder german themed bar german themed bar all german food and you eat it you have a good time and you're like but this was a part of it's like going to a confederate themed bar it is like i think i think we're gonna walk in with rich and they're just like that is is that um white privilege what that german bars can exist it's weird it's a weird like touchy thing where it's like uh should we have let any like beer gardens and that i have jewish friends who think that we should not they

hate that shit right yeah that really actually hate that shit like parent people whose parents were in the hall our grandparents were in the hall because like i hate like don't take me to this i thought i thought the same thing it's like it's similar to like if you uh you know you're like hey like tell your black friends, hey, come out to this place. It's called the plantation. We're going to drink mint juleps all night. And then the waitresses,

they're all dressed like slaves. I mean, you go to Red Line and they're all like the German... They're not dressed like Nazi soldiers. No, but if you look closely, some of the lines, the lines are a little zigzaggy. There are little zigzaggy lines in there.

You're like, I don't know what that is. That S is too close. I don't like that. Is that math or hate speech? There's two super S's from high school on the wall. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The S, you know, that's probably Nazi. Yeah. Nazi stuff. The S, the 88 school on the wall. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The S, you know, that's like, that's probably Nazi. Yeah. Nazi stuff. The S,

the 88s, the old. Yeah. There's a lot of fun. A lot of fun. Little things you can do. Don't forget about the Z. What you could do with a Z in the Nazi. What's the Z? What's the Z? I've never seen the Z. Just two Z's is the Nazi. Oh. Right. I never thought of that. I knew a kid in high

school that used to just go to the bathroom and draw swastikas all the time. It was weird. It was like his like zen part. I never thought of that. I knew a kid in high school that used to just go to the bathroom and draw swastikas all the time. It was weird. It was like his zen garden. I knew some kids like that. I mean, I probably had a two-day period where I just kept drawing swastikas in my notebook. I gotta say.

Just because you're like, it's fun. Look at this. You tell somebody that like a kid in high school who's already rebellious that like this is the worst thing ever. They're going to draw it all the time. It's just going to incite emotion out of people. Exactly. I remember a lot of times when I would see like a Nazi thing carved

into something. Also like I'm from like a metropolis, extremely liberal area, the D.C. area. It's very liberal. I would just think it's hilarious every single time. It's like good placement. That is shocking. It is funny. That is a good bet. Well, also hating the that is a good bit well also also hating the jews

is such a fun because it's such an antiquated yeah i know exactly yeah it's just like oh look at you a little 1940s man anytime someone really hates like really really hates jews i find it like cute it yeah it's like why are you even wasting your time it's like oh look at your little tiny pea brain that's so cute yeah they like control the weather you're so retarded yeah you're right it's like watching a kid like make like play-doh it's so outdated yeah it's like okay boomer you hate the jews boomer okay german okay right it's the and they're always like you know those jews always establishing a strong community and taking care of their own and being financially wise yeah yeah it's horrible horrible god they did all the things my community failed at this is bullshit why didn't they destroy everything they

did all the things i talk about what people should do and then they didn't i hate them for it yeah i mean it's the funniest thing is people saying the Jews run everything while the Protestants just took like ran every shadow organization. There's not enough of us. They run some stuff. Yeah, there's there's five. There's six million Jews worldwide. Totally. And like a hundred of them are smart. So they came back.

There's six million Jews worldwide. I think there's twelve million Jews worldwide. Yeah, six million are in America. Half of them are in America. Half of them are in America. Most of them are in Brooklyn. Yeah, you know what we're thinking. You know what I'm thinking, pal. Hey, we're on the same wavelength.

Same wavelength. We need one more. I also love the people who are like, hey, you know, it's not, you know, the Holocaust could happen in America. It's like, well, no, it wouldn't. No, it can't. it wouldn't yeah it can't you moron my other favorite thing is when people if germans had netflix the holocaust would never have happened can you imagine like the holocaust with tiktok at the same time simple as that jewish kid flossing in the camp dude hitler would have been hitler would have been distracted all the nazis would have done when they would have been Hitler would have been distracted.

All the Nazis would have done and they would have been like, okay, now do the coordinated dance. You did not get it right.

Hitler would have been like, I want to kill all the Jews, but there's 15 year olds shaking their pussy on TikTok.

But I need the pedophile app to distract me. When I'm coming down off of the meth, I get intrigued. I can't stop. Everyone knows meth makes you want to jack off. I cannot help it if I see the girl and then she happens to be 14.

It's not my fault. Why TikTok show me that? TikTok no regulation. I'm on so much meth. I'm jacking off a smoking cigarette. I don't know why my algorithm is huge titted 15-year-olds. That's so much meth. I'm jacking off a smoking cigarette. I don't know why my algorithm is huge titted 15 year olds.

That's not my fault. Hitler would be like, should I do Holocaust? Oh no. Oh no. Oh no, no, no,

no, no. Oh no. Who's the chief's quarterback? I forget his name. Patrick Mahomes. Yeah, Hitler

would just Holocaust his brother. His weird Puerto Rican dances. Patrick Mahomes has stripper body movements. He's a cloud chaser. Kill him. You see how they shook hands before Super Bowl.

They do not like each other. He danced on Sean Taylor's memorial. Kill him. Yeah, Hitler's profile would say he had black lives matter. He did, I'd say. As he's just running the trains. Yeah, they would do the Holocaust in Montana or something, where nobody goes.

And no Jews live. Yeah, well, they just have to train them in. That's where they send them there. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's where all the camps would be. It'd be South Dakota. It'd just be Joey and those friends. And Kevin Costner.

Yeah, it'd be Joey. It's Yellowstone. I'm visiting Joey. Just him coming out like, we don't want no Jews around this part. Oh, you're killing him? Okay. You're visiting Joey?

Yeah, I'm about to go to South Dakota on Monday to see Joey and his family and friends. I've known Joey for like 10 years. I've always been fascinated as to what area in this country turned him into this like 1940s milkman slash prize fighting slash John Wayne impressionist. Milkman Jack Dempsey. I've always wondered, how did Joey

turn into this? What part of the country has made my friend the most fascinating, hilarious person that sounds like Trump when he's drunk and just is like, he literally looks like from another era. Who made a gumshoe detective in the 2020s?

Sounds like Perry Mason. He really does your body buddy, but Joey always needs to be putting a piece of cardboard in his old wingtip because there's a hole in it. It would be funny if you go out there and it's just like the Whitakers from

West Virginia, like those family. It's like this is my this back story. I've told you a lot about him. He's like do you think Hitler would have done 9-11 or would have it have been like not enough people for him? Yeah, he would have just had a lot more

planes. He would have just been like we need way more planes, way more planes, put some Jews on them. We can't teach the Jews to fly their plane. They'll just fly it to a bank and take over it again. I mean, what do we do? We tried to do 9-11, but the Jews, they just flew to Miami. They flew to Boca.

And retired. And started a law firm and a consulting firm. I basically brought up 9-11 just because I had this thought the other day. I'm sure it's been done before. Sure, sure, sure. I told Richard before we started the podcast. Do you think, because I forgot that 9-11 happened on a Tuesday.

Sure. So that means Monday, people went to work, normal, annoying, just another case of the Mondays in the towers. And so do you think people that worked in the towers on that Monday,

at least one group, at least a group of people somewhere in those towers. They had a big presentation or some annoying thing to do the next day. And before they left, at the very end of the night, they were like, tomorrow's going to be a living hell. Yeah, they had their one-on-one with their manager on Tuesday. Yeah, they're just like, you've got to get us out of this.

I mean, come on. Tomorrow is going to kill us all. Come on. Come on, Taliban. It's turning on the news. My Q1 numbers were way off. I was about to get shit can, but thankfully everyone I know is dead. I can't be blamed for Q1.

Look what happened to the twin towers. You think, boss, you think we're going to get any sales with the towers crumbled to the ground? We're all covered in ash. We look weird. I didn't have my papers. They got all burned up in the jet fuel. It was weird how a 911 shouldn't have burned at that temperature. Boss, I had the

whale of a deal. The Henderson account was coming through. Jet fuel melted it all. I had everything we needed in Tower 7. What was I supposed to do? The whole fucking presentation was in tower seven. Devin, we had a whole pitch deck guys. It was great.

Jet fuel was all over the place. The twin towers did blackface on nine. Yeah. Well, you know, the sad thing about, uh, or I guess maybe it's funny about 9-11

is it all depends on the lens you're looking live through as nietzsche said it's all it's a grand dance life repeating eternally but because it was so, it was so early in the day that almost no executives got killed. It was just secretaries. Yeah. Hardworking. It's all the owners who show up at like 11 scream for 30 minutes. Like, all right,

I'm going to go fuck this prostitute uptown. Right. Right. Yeah. None of the, yeah. So there's so many stories of like higher up people being like, yeah,

it wasn't, I didn't end up going that day. No, yeah, literally all of them. Yeah, they all got a phone call. This guy knows what I'm talking about. I made the... I was 11. 9-11.

No, no, no. I won't be saying that. Was that an old Louis bit? I can't remember if it was me and Ben riffing this, where it was, they're making the call to all the jewish people on 9-11 they're like hey yeah we're doing a 9-11 today so and the jewish people knew exactly yeah they're like hey don't go it's 9-11 yeah it's this year we're doing the 9-11 so all right mazel tov take care click is ben back in town bring i think he flies back. I think he just landed, actually.

We got to get Ben on soon with both of you. We got to do a big Avery Brothers podcast. Yeah. Anyway, should we get to the Patreon? Sure. How long have we done? We've done like an hour and six. Oh, okay.

Yeah, perfect. Let's get to the Patreon. Let's get the Patreon. Yeah, the Patreon will be less political. Yeah, patreon.com. Hey, watch podcasts. We will be less political. Yeah, patreon.com, much hate watch podcast. We will be much more tame. Because that's, you know,

the people that don't get how it works. They're like, no, no, we can do, we can say whatever we want on this one. It's just going out to the world. We usually actually do it reverse. We always do it reverse. On the very one, they're like,

they're not people. And on the Patreon, I'm like, listen, I care about everybody because we did the first hour and then we feel bad. Yeah, then we feel bad about it. We should also always just do the Patreon first

so we can just really let them fly. But I always think the first stuff is the funniest. Yeah, the first. Well, you know, you don't want to tell that to the audience. You know, the Patreon is where it's at. It's the exact same level of quality. Because we're always the same. Top tier, always.

We are all. I'm never. I kind of, I don't. I'm never. I kind of. I don't think I'm capable of not being myself at all times. I went around you guys. When I go to. I'm around like other people. I'm like, I have like a, you know, I was.

I was like raised. Well, I know. Sure. We can all put a mask on. I know how to act. Oh, I'm. Way funnier around other people. When I'm around you guys, I'm like completely unhinged.

Yeah. When I'm at my office job, it's just like, oh, just like oh wow that's crazy yeah so they're making another anchorman wow that's gonna be so funny yeah yeah yeah back to my desk are they wait are they making no it's just like bullshit it's it's literally just like you'll be in an office and somebody's like man you remember in fucking anchorman when um he's like i have leather-bound books and he just has to be like yeah that's so funny man did you have any did anybody at work today like about the did they no i don't think they even knew honestly they're literally like so conservative they get their news like four days later yeah they're like all they were talking about is that the two for five at mcdonald's is

over they'll come in on monday and be like can you believe they outlawed the jewel? And then on Tuesday they'll be like, ah, good, good, win! Everybody at your job is like, I don't know, Newsmax hasn't covered it yet. Alright. Join us over at Patreon, folks. Patreon.com slash hatewatchpod. Podcast, right?

Is it pod or podcast? Hatewatch! You do the Patreon. Patreon.com slash hatewatchpodcast. Anyway, the link is in everything. So if you can't find it, you're mentally challenged. Yeah. Alright, anyway. Thanks! See ya! Bye!