Hate Watch with Devan Costa - TikTok Nuremberg

Episode Date: March 27, 2023

We watch the TikTok hearings, Tekashi69 get beat up at the gym, AirBNB squatters, Joey is being evicted, we wrap it up with John's Gun Corner and of course the Rapid City Round Up Get weekly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/HateWatchPodcast

It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that. I know. But lately I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over. Many Americans, I think, feel that way. Fill your hands with Topo Chico, you son of a bitch.

We were just saying that the 40-ounce White Claw from last episode that John had was quite, it was the drink of a gay cholo, as they said. But John got a Topo Chico one this time. Now he thinks he's like a tough cowboy. They're made in Texas. So I went to the AM, PM, and I was going to get another White Claw. But then I remembered Devin saying they're for gay cholos.

So I chose to get a Topo Chico instead. Yeah, White Claw is what guys, they play, what did I say? They play dice with handle beads. Yeah, it's like when you buy a White Claw, you get like a free popper with it. Exactly. Topo Chico's a lot cooler. It's tastier, honestly.

It tastes more natural. Oh, well, that's what tough guys want, is tasty. Yeah, they want their natural strawberry guava flavor. John Wick tonight, baby. Woo! John Wick 4. baby. Woo! John Wick 4.

I heard it's like fucking 17 hours long. Fuck off. Are they doing this to us? I heard it's like the Irishman. It's three hours long. We're seeing it 1045. Are we out of our fucking minds? We're going to be hammered by this. Oh my God, dude.

We're going to be so fucked up. We're going to be so hammered at the AMC. We're going to get fucked up at the Cheesecake Factory before. Is it officially the last one? Because that will help me get through it. No. It's not the last one, dude. They're going to make another one.

They're going to keep making Wicks? I think it's the last one. No. That'd be sick. You can't end on four. If you go past three, you've got to go to like ten. Really? That's what you did with Fast and the Furious.

I knew that was Fast and the Furious logic. Let's not base the rules of movies on Fast and the Furious. Well, Fast and the Furious makes a lot more money than these movies. I want to see a movie called Wanwick, and it's a mild-mannered, hardworking Latino man, and they kill his dog, and he's like, they're rushing and they kill my barrel. They kill his pit bull.

And he's like, they're like, what are you going to do? What are you going to do, Wan? He goes, I'm going to file a complaint with the city. I'm going to key their car. He doesn't really have any recourse. He's not a violent man at all. He makes a piñata. It's an hour and a half.

No, it's a three-hour epic. And it's just him in court. He's like, they are not legal. I work hard for this country. He's like, this system is not giving me justice. They kill my peril i am one week they took my cheetos hot i am one week they took my font orange they took everything from me but i will not fight back with violence oh man so john uh oh this is

scary oh whoa wait you're you're looking at Steve1989? Steve MRE? I love that dude. I figured maybe we'd get into a little Steve MRE later. That's great. I love that. Yeah. Great guy.

Yeah. All right. So, but this TikTok video you sent, what's going on? They're trying to ban TikTok finally, right? So, it's like, I mean, we all know TikTok. Here's the deal. It's like, it's okay to gather private information if it's a domestic company like google right you know but if it's those chinese motherfuckers yeah that's just over the

line so it's also this is i don't care about any of that it's it's i care about that but like tiktok should just be banned for the the content on it it's it's it's nothing more than a chinese like barnum and bailey i'm gonna call you you out real quick because you've said this many times. There's a 14-year-old on a subway making TikToks that are funnier than your favorite comedian. Sure, but he shouldn't do it on TikTok. No more TikTok.

Okay, yeah, do it on something else. But I think TikTok is actually really fucking fun. I mean, it took off where Vine shouldn't have taken off. Sure, but there's also Underworlds on TikTok that it's some of the most deranged people you've ever seen on planet also even the funniest stuff on tiktok it's only funny on tiktok they figured out how to be funny in this weird little media that doesn't translate anywhere else yeah like like an add you know yeah truly funny person can be funny anywhere in any medium it's like a bunch of autistic kids doing memes that are very funny

yeah but it's not like like, it's crazy. Oh, are they gonna ban the app that has 15-year-olds showing their camel toe? I hope that doesn't happen. Jesus Christ. Half the app is guys jacking off the kids dancing. You're the one supporting that. I've never downloaded it.

I'm banned from it, so I'm permanently banned, and I hope they fucking ban that thing in America. I hate that stupid website. Yeah, Dan Crenshaw was really fucking on one. It's just a fuck, it's a daycare for retards, that website. TikTok is a daycare. So they had a congressional hearing with the CEO of TikTok.

Crenshaw? Crenshaw was pissed. He's got his eye on it. Crenshaw's pissed. Very good. Very good. Crenshaw, by the way, has the coolest eye patch of all time yeah can we just talk about how cool dan crenshaw is like like not he's really not that cool no he's not cool at all

but not as like a person but just as a like being like visually not visually but also like if you're like there's an ex-navy seal that's a member of congress who has one eye he looks like a comic book character yeah he's literally like a super villain he looks like a comic book character. Yeah, he's literally like a supervillain. He looks like a pirate's accountant. Yeah, it's crazy. And he has the eye patch that he like sticks into his eye. It's free floating. It's like literally like a Mortal Kombat character. Oh, it doesn't have the rope? Doesn't have the rope. He just has

this crazy like steel eye patch that's just like, it's insane. Yeah. It's steel? I don't know what it is. I hope it's steel. It's just steel, that's a bit much. I hope it's like rated for. If it's steel, that's a bit much. Bulletproof? I hope it's rated for type 3. It's got a Teflon eye.

It's got a fake eye also. There was a great video. They look real. Chop the side of your face off. That's more distinguished. But there's a great video where... Get that mask from Boardwalk Empire. Yeah, get that fucking Boardwalk Empire mask. Get that half-face mask.

The Phantom of the Opera mask. Yeah, we don't want to see that patch. But yeah, so Dan Crenshaw was going off on fucking Instagram and all that shit. But I guess they questioned the CEO of TikTok about a video that was posted about a congressional hearing that hadn't happened where the head of the Department of Energy was threatened or something. So I was like, how could you have gotten this information? But it's one of the funniest things I've seen in so long. All right, let's check it out.

Mr. Show, I'd like to direct your attention to the screen for a short video. Shoes, you two. Sounds like a type of dip at AM, PM. They're just playing a TikTok inok in congress yeah it's about guns what was that so explain the meme so it's somebody saying me at the way go back i want to see what this says so it says uh me as fuck at the house energy and commerce committee on 3 23 23 and he's unloading a clock and they're using a tech. This only has like 475 likes.

Yeah. Well, he's tagging Kathy McCarver. Oh, who's in Congress? Kathy McCarver Rogers. Who is, it's very funny. This is a TikTok. It's, I instantly thought of Joey. It's a death threat.

Yeah. Yeah, I instantly thought of Joey. It's a death threat. Is this your account, Joey? Yeah. No, no, no. Joey's not a Glock guy. He's more of like a.

No, this would be like, it would be like. Tannerite like a right guy tick tick tick yeah but um i i did a little deep dive on uh kathy mcmorris rogers uh what's she about well she's an evangelical creationist uh that is against gay marriage and uh it's very funny that uh i mean that's the woman who's yelling at the chinese man oh yeah no no no not the woman who's yelling at the Chinese man? Oh, yeah. No, no, no. Not the woman who's yelling at the Chinese man. This is the... Evangelical creationist.

From Washington. That's the woman who's being threatened. Yeah, that's the woman being threatened. She just loves dinosaurs. Yeah, she loves... She thinks that... Big Jurassic Park. There's a relationship between a man and a woman.

Creationists just love Jurassic Park. Like, no, humans did ride around with dinosaurs you asshole jurassic park's the only thing that's come close to the beginning of mankind but it was like it was like it's it's hilarious to me that this woman is for the woman who's speaking to this the ceo of tiktok is standing up for you know kathy Kathy McMorris Rogers, but, uh, she is, uh, basically a horrible human being. And she's acting as if the,

you know, this Chinese company is responsible for people in America being pissed off at a person who not only is just a bad person, but is, is like, you know, embezzling. I mean,

if you look up her, her name and controversy, like a million things come up. She's using campaign funds. They're using TikTok as a scapegoat. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Regardless of this, it should still be banned. I guess that she said like the House Energy and Commerce Committee,

like it wasn't public at the time that this date or something. So it was like some inside agent was posting this propaganda. Is this CIA? Yeah. So it was like some inside agent was posting this propaganda. It's the CIA. Yeah. There are Chinese. Chinese intelligence.

Yeah. It's a sigh up. Yeah. Chinese intelligence. The Chinese Jason Bourne dancing. TikTok. He's doing a Jason Bo. I will eat.

He's sucking one of those giant clams that squirts everywhere. Shrip one ton! Shrip one ton of thing! That's the thing, though. It's outrageous these people have such cognitive dissonance that they can't comprehend that, yeah, somebody might want to fucking execute that. Oh, they don't seem to understand. I mean, there is a point, though, that, first of all, this is a

very difficult thing to moderate technically because there's no in the text, there's no way to detect a death threat. If you want to detect imagery and ban all guns, then that's way too much. So he found a slang way to do a death threat with an image. It's simply an image of a gun firing. And it's him as fuck, though. It's him ASF at the Energy and Commerce Committee.

Just watch the rest of the video. It's funny. I love how the CEO of TikTok's watching this. Mr. Show, that video was posted 41 days ago. This lady's like, Mr. Show, can I eat bullets? She's like, Mr. Show, can I get a number three? If that's the case, I hope he shoots this place up. Mr. Show, remember when they banned my cooking show for being racist?

Mr. Show, are you aware that I'm Steve Cherepa? See, it is captioned me as F at the House Energy and Commerce Committee on March 23rd of this year. This video was posted before this. The Chinese guy's like, oh, that's American problem. At the House Energy and Commerce Committee on March 23rd of this year, this video was posted before this. The Chinese guys like, oh, that's American problem. You guys shoot up schools. No, you got a problem with guns. We take gun away.

We take gun away. We kill baby. We don't allow kids. That's a you problem. You keep saying that's a you problem. It's not about the one child policy. I think that's a very problem. You keep saying that's a you problem. He's talking about the one job policy. I think that's a very interesting point to raise. But more concerning is the fact that it names this chairwoman by name.

Your own community guidelines state that you have a firm stance against enabling violence on or off TikTok. We do not allow people to use our platform to threaten or incite violence. Yeah. Or to promote violence. I got banned for a joke. There's people making death threats on this thing. What the fuck? It's because this lady's making the rules. It fell through the cracks.

Glorify off-platform violence. We ban the account. This video has been up for 41 days. Yeah, the cracks that this lady made. It is a direct threat to the chairwoman of this committee, the people in this room, and yet it still remains on the platform. And you expect us to believe that you are capable of maintaining the data security, privacy, and security of 150 million Americans where you can't even protect the people in this room?

That's such a weird point. I think that's a blatant display of how vulnerable you are. this room? That's such a weird point. Moderating content is not even close to a security issue with passwords. You couldn't take action after 41 days when a clear threat As this Mr. Chu is like he puts on the Batman cape and takes

action himself. He does look like a character in The Dark Knight. Christian Bale's about to pick him up in an airplane and scoop him out with a parachute. Somewhere in Hong Kong, and they just jump off a building. This guy's going to be in John Wick 4 tonight. Donnie Yen is working double time.

John Wick's like, TikTok's ruined my daughter's life. You damn well know that you cannot protect the protect the data and damn well of this committee or the you damn well know you can't avoid fourth mail app because it is an extension of the ccp and with that i yield back can i respond chair no we're gonna move on no oh fuck them dude they don't let him what let mr chew Mr. Chu speak. That's it? He probably would have owned him. Yeah, he would have killed her, dude. Is there any more TikTok?

I mean, you can look up TikTok Dan Crenshaw because he goes off. Here we go. Here's a maybe some good shit. Dan Crenshaw went off on this? He wants it banned, right? Yeah, Dan Crenshaw wants it off. It is a legitimate security issue, though. Yes, it is.

Yeah, yeah, for sure. We're having problems with China and the ukraine and we're you know there's a lot of tension there's a lot of international tension well think about how much power you could have to leverage over um american citizens if you own uh instagram for example like every kid is dming crazy shit to each other on Instagram. Fast forward 10 years, a bunch of them are politicians. If you have some database, you could look up. Yep. Were they on our app?

Yes, they all were. What are their DMs? Okay, let's go. Okay, you're fucked. We blackmailed. What is TikTok's... Does TikTok have a... Facial recognition.

I know, but does it have a messenger? Yeah. Can you message people on TikTok as well? What I'm terrified of is like, that's scary itself. But, like, I'm going to get my fucking tinfoil hat on right now. Like, so what if, right? That's where you keep your ribs. Exactly.

What if. Right? Because he's a fat, little fat joke. So what if, what if, what if, like, they use facial recognition technology to, like, you know, get statistics on racial information in America? You can probably look this up on Wikipedia and figure it out, right? But they're literally, like, they're designing. They use facial recognition technology to get statistics on racial information in America. You can probably look this up on Wikipedia and figure it out. They're designing... They're like phrenologists through TikTok.

Easily. Studying skulls. I remember when coronavirus first came out and they were talking about... I do remember that period of time. Remember when they first came out and they were studying the effect that the coronavirus had on different ethnicities

yeah yeah yeah so you could manufacture a virus that could affect specific ethnicities right sure so what if and i would i would i would gardener i would i would say maybe i wonder i i'm just throwing a number out there but but I would say 60% of the US armed forces is probably Latino. Okay. Probably Latino. Okay. Maybe 40%.

40. Let's look it up. Look it up. I'm going to say 40. I'm going to say 40. I'm going to say 40. Okay. Changing to 40.

Somehow. I'm going to say 40. That seems high. It's going to be the majority. It's going to be the majority. Racial breakdown armed forces they're uh 21 women 17 men that's a lot still that's a landslide so okay what if they manufactured a virus that specifically targeted latinos and say they used it say there was a mainland invasion

to china sure right so if we were to invade china if there was a war on china it would happen on the coast okay say say they were to manufacture a virus that would specifically target Latinos. Okay. Yeah. You can easily wipe out- The hot Cheeto virus? The hot Cheeto virus. I can wipe out 40% of my soldiers.

I'm pretty sure Frito-Lay has been working on that for 30 years. They're giving kidney stones. No, you can easily do- That shit, nobody really even talks about. John, what the fuck is your point? Yeah, what are you saying? That's the point. They can use shit like this to just figure out who we are, what we are, what we're doing.

Right. It's bizarre. It's weird. Everyone should be a privacy advocate in some way. But all these apps do is just invade our privacy ultimately. Anybody could also just go to any publicly available information, like, on Instagram or Facebook or whatever. Like, no, Chinese people could scrape Wikipedia or Facebook or Google

or whatever publicly available databases there are. They don't need their own app. The privately exchanged information is what's sketchy. Well, also, like, you keep in mind, like, the privately exchanged information is sketchy, but also, like, I believe in, like, you keep in mind, like, the private exchange information is sketchy, but also, like, I believe in, like, the early Ukraine war, like, people were using

Snapchat in their location services to figure out, like, the location of, like, rival, like, troops. Exactly. Like, so there's, like, there's, like, that's a hell of a lot better than the dog filter, I'll tell you that. The death filter? Yeah. Where is your enemy? I vaguely... It's the death filter yeah where is your enemy i vaguely drone filter the

drone filter just hot girls like day like outside of a nightclub just like we're gonna send a drone also i vaguely remember like i was picking up when i was an uber driver down in north county san diego i pick up like pick up trans hookers? I'd pick up trans hookers. No, I'd pick up Marines, and they'd be like, yeah, certain apps are banned to use on Camp Pendleton. Because they could use tracking information from Snapchat to essentially map out a military base. Right. Things like that.

There's all these things you could do. No, I know what you're saying, and I agree. I mean, it is dangerous. Yeah. I think it's fully dangerous. Not even for those aspects. I think it's fully dangerous. Not even for those aspects. I think it's more dangerous for what it's doing

to the human race in America. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just think it's culturally impacting us at a rapid rate and it's making people dumber and it's giving

worthless people careers. And I know there's all these people like protesting, keep TikTok, it helped me grow my business, like all that shit.'s like I don't it doesn't matter I don't care it's helped also a lot of other people have

meaningless businesses and they're just you know ruining the earth with their nonsense the teachers union strike was happening in LA the other day and I was and they were all stopping at my bar because they all take public transit because they can't I hated that I went to Joey's gym and fucking came back and I got stuck in a teacher's union strike.

All those teachers. They're just getting fucked up. This is my favorite text ever that I've ever got. Devin's been coming to my gym. He gave me two kind of crazy texts back to back, by the way. I texted you today. I went to Joey's gym, couldn't find parking, and I just left. No, yeah.

No, yeah. So Devin comes to use the gym in my building every day. I went four days this week. You did a lot this week, but it was just very funny because we always go like, okay, yeah, I'm probably going at like 1230. And Devin's like, oh, could we do one? But we figured out. So we figure out a time and Devin just suddenly goes like, dude, I can't fucking find parking.

I'm going home. So he left his house, drove over, couldn't find parking, just went right back home. Right back home. I was also very, I'm very tired today for some reason. So I was just kind of like,

well, like, I'm not doing this thing where I usually drive around the neighborhood for 20 fucking minutes looking for a spot. I would never do that. Your neighborhood is so fucking riddled. I don't have a car,

so I'd never experience this. Dude, it is a utter hell. I got rid of my car because of that. They're constantly doing construction. It's finish. Isn't it done? Everything's done. The road is a road. Stop working on it.

It's like falling down. I guarantee they're fucking, they just need to meet a quota and they have to be out there for some fucking reason or they don't get their fucking money. Well, it's because they're trying to meet a quota and they have to be out there for some fucking reason or they don't get their fucking money well it's because they're trying to polish a turd they're fake fixing the fucking yeah they are like let's get like let's make this area that used to be like very nice and profitable let's try to make it nice again let's get the homeless people out fix it up a little bit yeah try to put some you know get some business going here it's so

fucking obnoxious. You know, I almost kill somebody like 30 times a day when I'm in your neighborhood. I'm just trying to find parking. I do know. I'm almost driving over people like all the time. I love to walk wherever they can walk. You know, if you drive in LA, you almost kill somebody 700 times a day. Well, you do.

Devin gets violent behind the wheel. No, I don't. I'm a very good driver and I've never had anything happen. Devin has like 15 dents in his car because he's cussed. We're just talking about this all the way over here. People hit me. I was trying to get to a lane. People look at my car and they go, that guy sucks. And they just ram

into me like it's bumper cars. I was trying to get to a lane and Joey was like, Devin does it every time. And I was like, Devin's car looks like a fucking broken trash can. He said that you can do it every time because everyone's scared of your car. He's not scared to hit us. That is it. You know when I drive on my street

because it's a real narrow street, so people if people don't drive on my street often, they don't know how to just maneuver by you. I drive right in the middle. When somebody's coming up, I lean to my left. You're playing chicken. I pull my wheel to the left and I go right down the middle.

And you know how many times I've done this thing where, you know, remember that scene in Stand By Me when Kiefer Sutherland, they're racing. And he gets in the left lane to pass the car, and the truck's coming right at him, and he just stays there, and the truck flies off the fucking road, and he wins? I do that every day. Because fuck my car up. Fuck my car up. Kill me.

Please kill me. You know it's an insane move. They can't do it. They got a new Subaru. Those fucking losers. They've got, yeah. You've got nothing to lose

and they've got everything to lose. They've got everything to lose. They have a new Subaru. They have a kid. They're fucking, you know, they want everything to go well. Their new Subaru Outback.

Go fuck yourself, Subaru drivers. Fucking retards. You know, Subarus are the only car where you buy them and you find a mountain climber in your trunk. You fuel them with cliff bars. You gotta feed your Subaru trail mix. They don't have an engine.

They just have a hamster wheel and a mountain climber. You have to give it track mix to run. It doesn't run on gas. Have you ever opened your door to get into another lane? Dude, I'm not kidding. I get out of my car. It takes me 10 minutes to get out of my car. I purposely disrupt everyone on my street.

Everyone uses my street as a cut-through to get to the freeway at a certain time. And when I park and it's busy, I purposely take like seven minutes to parallel park. I hold up. I'm not kidding. I hold up. I'm not kidding. I hold up a line of traffic because go fuck yourself. I've seen this. My neighborhood. I hold them up.

I take a really long time. Then I open my door really violently, hoping somebody rams into it and I get a big settlement. Hoping a bicyclist. Bicyclists are just a scourge of society. I hope bicyclists just rot in hell. You're a worthless scumbag. We haven't seen the penny-farthing guys. You're cycling in LA.

Oh, yeah. Big tour to France on Sunset Boulevard, asshole. I hope you get fucking hit. I hope you die. But I fucking, I take so much time. And then I open my door, and I'll purposely kind of stumble back into the street. Kind of hoping. I guess I'm kind of suicidal or something. You're like Mr. Bean.

I really hate everyone so much. I open all the doors and shit. Anyway. Yeah. Yeah, it sucks ass here. I hate this city. Just picking Joey up. It was like I had to fucking get out of my car with a whistle.

And then every day. I love this city. Do you want to know why? Because you don't drive. Because you don't drive. of my car with a whistle. And then every day. I love this city. Do you want to know why? Because you don't drive. Because you don't drive. I don't have a car. Yeah. Just get rid of your car.

Every day, Joey, there's a protest or a march. For things I don't even know. I didn't even know it was an issue. I'm downtown in your neighborhood, and I make a left turn, and all of a sudden it's a bunch of black trans kayakers doing a fucking protest. Like, hey, they're keeping us out of the Olympics. I've seen those.

Yeah, they get very obscure. Oh, a hot air balloon salesman really pissed off this week. They're going on strike. They're on strike, and they're in the middle of the road. Oh, no, we need to protect the midgets association of getting shot out of cannons. There's a bunch of midgets in the street.

They're not letting us get shot out of cannons. They've got to sign with a cannon. They've got to sign. They're not good equal pay for midgets being shot at. They're firing themselves in City Hall. Oh, my God. A bunch of luch cannons. They're firing themselves in City Hall. Oh, my God. A bunch of luchadors like, they're not letting us fight roosters anymore. Every day there's a fucking issue.

Fuck civil rights. I'm trying to get home. You heard it here. You heard it here. Fuck civil rights. I love civil rights unless you're in my fucking way. And they're trying to ban Skittles now. Did you hear about this?

What is going on? In Los Angeles, they're trying to ban Skittles and Hot Tamales. Is this like a homophobic thing? Hot Tamales? No. Look it up. Go like Skittles and Hot Tamales. What the fuck is going on?

California banning Skittles. I mean, Hot Tamales are great. What am I, South Dakota? Sweet Brock sent me this. Because he's constantly sending me stuff like, dude, you live in a fucking... Like, you fucking... Homos. Is he fucking balls deep in his cousin while he's constantly sending me stuff like, dude, you live in a fucking... Like, you fucking... Homos. Is he fucking balls deep in his cousin

while he's sending you this shit? Brock's making fun of LA. Why don't you go hang out at the bar in a treehouse? Look how fat... Devin was just like viciously attacking LA. As soon as he heard Brock was doing it, he's like, yo, fuck you. LA's the best city in the world.

Anyone not from here talks about hating here. It pisses me off. My fucking favorite city in the la's the best anyone not from here talks about hating here it pissed my fucking favorite city in the world and i'm not from the best city on end of the rainbow california bill targets skittles other snacks with toxic chemicals oh whatever yeah that makes sense yeah fucking i'm sure there's a bunch of horrible shit well it's like it's like um what is that uh yellow number five or whatever. It's in everything. So now they're saying that it's deadly. But why only in Skittles? That's odd. That was just the biggest name.

What is the tamale thing? They're in tamales? They're in a lot of candy, but Skittles and hot tamales, I think, were the big names. Oh, hot tamales. I thought they were hot tamales. I thought it was just an incredibly racist bill

banning tamales. Maybe it's going to get a ban. These women, they come and go. There's not even enough meat in them. It's all corn. It's just some politician.

It's just a bunch of corn. Fuck you. Oh, man. All right. Back to the TikTok thing for a second. Who's this? We have breaking news right now.

The CEO of TikTok is on Capitol Hill trying to convince lawmakers that the app is safe and secure thing for a second. Who's this? Hello. Oh, there she is. Tell me she's not a reptile. Of course she is. Look at her. Of course she is. That lady lives off of frozen mice. Little baby mice.

It's like, I moved to the UK to attend college, and then here to the US. It's like, I am not Chinese. I actually met my wife here. By the way, she was just born a few miles away from here in Virginia. I am American, my friend. Relax, Joe. I'm basically American.

My wife just won Academy Award for everything, everywhere, all at once. By the way, have you guys seen that stupid movie? It sucks ass. I hate it. It's horrible. You put it on, have you guys seen that stupid movie? It sucks ass. I hate it. It's horrible. You put it on, right? I watched the whole thing. I hated it.

It's a hunk of shit. Me and my dad walked out of the theater. Yeah, it's a hunk of shit. If I wanted to watch a Chinese family have a schizophrenic break, I'd order a free refill. That's my favorite one you've done so far. Sometimes the pot is just me railing off tweets. Devin ran that one by me he was like is this racist i was like no it's perfect ready to pretend like it was the first time i heard it

yeah john doesn't understand performance that was fine by the way there's one thing i wanted to say about john what john's not a performer no he just is i am john's just always him he doesn't even realize we do a performance this This is like kind of a performance. Yeah. He's he, that, and that's why he gets so much shit because he gives everything. Yeah.

He really is like putting himself. He's our most valuable member because John gives himself everything. I shit myself. He doesn't even realize what he's saying half the time. If you guys listen to the last patron, I gave everything I possibly could have given to this goddamn podcast. Let be honest check out the patreon patreon.com slash hate watch podcast john really gave us gold yeah he let he let me play but some videos where he it's interesting if you ever i if there's i could have life-ruining videos one a couple people i couldn't we lost like

three patrons or four in a row and i was i was one i'm not sure i wonder if they think we're racist or something but it was i i thought one of the most harmless versions of uh well what we did you could see it was very we're just drunk and one i'm not gonna say who it was but one of us who is not me seemed like they might have been racist on the With permission. No one was racist. It was a black dude yelling at us to say a word and then John said it. And I did it. Well now we have to just explain what happened. So you guys befriended

a local in New Orleans and his nickname was Chicago. And he was kind of like a street smart dude that was showing you guys around and he kept referring to you as the n-word yeah and i was i was like uh no hard r oh hard r hard r yeah i use soft a soft day but so so he much funnier when a black dude says what the heart is hilarious gets me every time but so he eventually was like just like say it back Call me. He's like, let your inner out.

And then I did it, and he hugged me, and it was an amazing moment. They called me a sand N-word. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So everyone's very drunk, and it's very funny, and it's loving. It's like they're all friends. It's one of the best moments I've ever had in America. But a couple of sensitive people in the thing took it as like.

I couldn't really tell if they were joking or not, but we did lose. But they quit. We lost like three or four patrons. Devin tried to call me racist to him, and then he got mad at me because he knew it was bullshit. I was doing some tricky white bullshit. Devin was being a little trickster. I was just throwing my white friend under the bus,

and I was like, he's not racist, but if we're surrounded by black dudes tonight... Devin was like, two years from now, this is going to come in handy. Oh, yeah. It was great. Back to you, Mr. Chew. was great back to you mr ching anyway back to back to before you go on i just want to say any american tech company can you think of one ceo of a tech company in america that is as well put together and well spoken as this glorious chinese no no No, no, no, no, no. They're all fucking nerds. Like Zuckerberg and shit.

They suck ass. This guy is like clean cut, looks good. He's the man. He's got his wits about him. He's composed. He's fighting back against all these retards in Congress. But I hope his app gets shut down and I hope he's homeless soon.

More than a billion monthly active users around the world, including over 150 million in the United States. Our app is a place where people can be creative and curious. And we're close to 5 million American businesses, mostly small businesses, go to find new customers and to fuel their growth. Now, as TikTok has grown, we've tried to learn the lessons of companies that have come before us, especially when it comes to the safety of teenagers. While the vast majority of people on TikTok are over 18, and one of our fastest growing demographics are people over 35. I'm about to move to fucking China.

We spent a lot of time adopting measures to protect teenagers. Yeah, China's just, they're a little more liberal than us. Let's go to Shanghai. I'm going to follow this man into hell pretty soon we forbid direct messaging for people under 16 and we have a 16 minute

watch time by default for those under 18 damn we have a suite of family pairing tools so their parents can participate in their teens experience

family pairing so the parents can fuck the kids they are paired together we match them perfectly So the parents can fuck the kids. They are paired together. We match them perfectly. A broccoli estesu. Who's this fucking Iranian Irishman behind him?

This guy that obviously has committed 30 murders in his life. Chemical Ali. Over 116 billion views on TikTok. And I think TikTok is inspiring a new generation. Who's that guy? Who's fucking that guy? This is the guy who's pissed off his kid can't do child porn anymore on TikTok. To discover a passion for math and science. Yeah, TikTok's all about math and science.

We'd also like to talk about national security concerns that you have raised that we take very, very seriously. No, you don't. You're spies. Let me start by addressing a few misconceptions about ByteDance, of which we are a subsidiary. ByteDance is not owned or controlled by the Chinese government.

Bullshit. It's a private company. Until they want to take it away from you. What are you going to do then? No such thing as a private company. 20% is owned by the founder and 20% owned by employees around the world. By then, it's just five board members.

Three of them are American. Now, TikTok- Put them in jail. No, they got some white faces. Yeah. We're headquartered in Los Angeles and in Singapore. And we have 7,000 employees in the US. He's like, three of them are round-eye Rita.

Three of them are Quilo. They have never used computer. We pay them 400 grand a year to sit on our board. Still, we have heard important concerns about the potential for unwanted foreign access

to U.S. data and potential manipulation of the TikTok U.S. ecosystem. Our approach How long is this? has never been to dismiss

or kill I feel like there's nothing happening. Get some Crenshaw on here, man. Look up Crenshaw. What does Crenshaw do? Look up TikTok

Crenshaw Congress. TikTok Crenshaw.. TikTok Crenshaw. There we go. There we go. Gentlemen from Texas. Let's go, Crenshaw. Five minutes, Mr. Crenshaw. Thank you, Madam Chair.

Thank you, Mr. Chu. Crenshaw's got an AR-15 in his hand. Crenshaw's like, first off, I'd like to announce that I'm the captain now. He's got a pair of night vision goggles on his head. We are now running the ship. If one more motherfucker calls me Snake Plissken, I'm going home. First off, I'd like to announce that ARG, matey. Appreciate that.

I want to get right to the critical point of concern. So TikTok is able to... Oh, he doesn't have the thing. It doesn't hold... It's just on his eye now. It's like a super villain. It doesn't go around his ear anymore. Yeah, he sticks it in his eye.

Interesting. Massive amounts of personal data. We all know that. That means it could, if it desired, to use this data to influence narratives and trends, create misinformation campaigns, encourage self-destructive behavior, purposefully allow drug cartels to communicate freely and organize human and drug trafficking. And to be fair, all social media companies could do that. Here's the difference.

It is only TikTok that is controlled by the Chinese Communist Party. All these other social media companies are not. Mr. Chu, do you agree that TikTok is controlled by the Chinese Communist Party. All these other social media companies are not. Mr. Chu, do you agree that TikTok is controlled by the CCP? No. Okay, I thought you'd say that. I disagree. I thought I might say it. He trapped him.

Here's why I disagree. Your parent company is ByteDance, right? That's correct. It is correct. So many of the workers who work at ByteDance, they're Communist Party members, right? I wouldn't know. Oh, I bet.

I think, for example, the chief editor at ByteDance, Zhang Wuping, is the Communist Party secretary. Let's go, Crenshaw. He works on the Chinese business. I don't know, man. The Chinese, the fucking Trident Stride CEO, he's doing well. He's handling this well. Kren is killing him right now, but let's see what he... Is he?

Kren. I think Kren is destroying him right now. I'm more of a Shu Chu guy. Well, let's keep watching. Let's see. I'm on the parent company. He works on the Chinese business. Right.

The parent company of TikTok. The Chinese business is called Douyin. Yeah, but it's all associated with ByteDance, right? So ByteDance owns a number of For ByteDance that are part of

the Chinese Communist Party. Like I said, you know, they are, ByteDance owns Chinese businesses and they operate in China. You don't know how many,

but Sir, I am in Christopher Nolan film right now. I don't know why you're asking me so many questions that are not in script.

Many must be card-carrying members of the CCP, right? In the Chinese business, yes. The CCP holds what's called a golden share invite dance that allows the CCP to control one board seat invite dance. That's publicly reported. That's not correct.

It's been publicly reported. They admitted to it. On our website, we have updated it so we can give people more transparent information on this. They have a share in a subsidiary that is only for the Chinese. That is not true, Cotton Eye Joe. I knew you a long time ago. And it's for the purposes of content licensing in China.

So there's not an internal CCP committee, which is a regular thing that happens in China. You know what CCP stands for, actually? Chinese child porn. If I run people, I cannot represent my Chinese business. Get him, Devin. Right? Here's the main point of concern.

China's 2017 national intelligence law states very clearly that, quote, any organization or citizen shall support, assist, and cooperate with state intelligence work in accordance with the law and maintain the secrecy of all knowledge of state intelligence work. In other words, ByteDance and also your TikTok employees that live in China, they must cooperate with Chinese intelligence whenever they are called upon. And if they are called upon, they're bound to secrecy. That would include you. So Mr. Chu, if the CCP tells ByteDance to turn over all data that tick-tock is collected inside the US even within Project Texas Do they have to do so according to Chinese law? Congressman first I'm Singaporean That's fine. But there are employees of yours and ByteDance is in China. We understand this concern in my opening statement

We said we hear these concerns. We didn't try to avoid them or you know know trivialize them we built something where we take that data and put it out of reach this is what we did we put it out of reach but they own you no we put it out of reach by by doing them by dance owns tick tock if by dance is told and it just sounds like they keep trying to say biden but they're like retarded yeah like by dance. Yeah. What are they yelling at each other about right now? I think it's a Chinese company. So this guy, Crenshaw is basically saying one of your partners, possibly one of your co-owners, is heavily associated with a Chinese company. What's the owner?

Yeah, well, so this guy's sort of trying to deny the fact that they have direct ownership with a Chinese company. The CCP owns bite dance because the CCP owns everybody in China. So by law, they can make them do whatever they want. And they say that by law, you can't tell anyone about it. So they can make you hand over that data. Is that correct? Data is stored here in American soil by an American company.

Well, you say that. We've taught that. But leaked audio from 80 internal TikTok meetings shows that U.S. user data has been repeatedly accessed from china when you said it hasn't been and here's the other thing following back on my my my colleagues line of questioning in your own privacy policy it says that you may share information within your so-called corporate group is by the time i was doing well right now yeah if you're talking about this the share of the the entity with the with the share i like i shared with uh the previous.

Is ByteDance part of the corporate group? ByteDance as a holding company is part of the corporate group, yes. It's part of the corporate group, okay. So your own privacy policy says you have to share data with ByteDance, and if the CCP says, hey, ByteDance, you're gonna do what we say, and you can't tell anyone about it because by law,

according to that 2017 national intelligence law, they have to do it. That's our concern. Maybe you haven't tell anyone about it because by law according to that 2017 national intelligence law they have to do it that's our concern maybe you haven't done it yet but my point is that you might have to and that's where our concerns come from i mean over over 300 tick tock employees have worked for china's state-run propaganda media that's just from looking at their linkedin profiles jesus okay so my last point is this i want to say this to all the teenagers out out there and TikTok influencers who think we're just old and out of touch. I just want to say this. John McClane, I will find you, and I will kill you. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker.

I just want to say this, Mr. Chu. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker. I do not care that your data is being accessed now, but it will be one day when you do care about it. And here's the real problem. With data comes power. They can choose what you see and how you see it. They can make you believe things that are not true.

They can encourage you to engage in behavior that will destroy your life, even if it is not happening yet, but it could in the future. The long-term goal of the Chinese Communist Party is the demise of the American power, and that starts with our youth. At any moment, they could demand

that all of TikTok's data be used to design an AI algorithm with the sole purpose of promoting Chinese interests and destroying our society from within. I want to know why Democrats and Republicans have come together on this. That's why we are so concerned. And I did see a video one time of the difference between between tick tock being access to the United States and tick tock in China. Like if you will go on tick tock in China, you'll get like a lot of videos about like respecting your parents and studying. But if you go to like tick tock in the United States,

like ass clapping, tick tock in America is about killing your parents and dancing on their, on their dead bodies. I think what we are trying to maybe that's a, a one way to look at it. But I also think that it's very possible that maybe Americans just like sicker, more fucked up shit. Like, we love twerking.

Dude, they eat dogs and shit. They, like, bully them a lot. Yeah, there's no fucking gutter oil section of TikTok in China. Yeah. Where it's Chinese kids, like, dancing in front of, like, hey, look, we're using human shit as oil.

Yeah, or, like, harvesting organs from ethnic minorities. Yeah, they've all been trained to, like, hey, look, we're using human shit as oil. Yeah, or like harvesting organs from ethnic minorities. They've all been trained to like avoid that content. I think they're sicker worse people in a societal way, but I think that pop culture wise Americans are like, listen, we like dancing.

We like twerking. We like all this stupid shit. It's like part of our culture. Chinese people are like, okay, no. Like our parents will fucking slit our throat. Yeah, are like, okay, no. Our parents will fucking slit our throats. Yeah, I mean, you're probably right there a little bit, but it's just it just feels a little too on the money.

I agree with everything Crenshaw just said. I genuinely think it's being used for evil and it's bad for us. And if it's not, it easily could be in the future. And I know there's a lot of fucking retards that get a lot of views for crowd work

and, you know, bad, really bad comedy on it and they think that they've started a career for themselves. What if Crenshaw started just going like, and Mr. Trout, all the crowd work comedians. Mr. Chu,

are you aware of what your app has done to stand-up comedy? They're not writing jokes anymore, Mr. Chow. There's no more jokes anymore, Mr. Chow. It's all crowd work. And it's not even clever stuff. It's not clever stuff. It's talking about dating. Oh, look at this guy in the front row.

Are you aware of that, Mr. Chow? They can basically say anything to a crowd, get a big reaction, your rap circulates. Mr. Chow, did you see the recent video of Burt Kreischer at Zany's? You guys see Takashi? Oh, God, yeah, this rocks.

Takashi, get the shit kicked out of him. That guy's talking mad shit to him too it's great takashi got the takashi 69 uh the rapper he's a snitch yeah a pedophile snitch pedophile snitch and um actually joey jack still owes joey money for uh oh yeah bet so i'll just like uh explain this really fast our friend Jack and I had a bet about Tekashi69 when he got indicted and was being charged. Jack was basically saying, okay, he's going to jail for life. And I was like, no. I just had a feeling like, no, he's not going to.

You're more ingrained in the reality of things like that. Well, no, but there was a compelling case that he might go to jail for a very long time because of the charges that were being levied against him. But I was like, I just had a feeling like, no, it's not going to happen. So then I dug through case files and I started

researching. And I basically went deep into RICO law and all these different things. And I, and then I end up coming out of it going like, okay, I'll bet you like 500 bucks that he goes to jail for 12 months or less. Wow. He's really just like a fucking,

he's just the rapper version of Henry Hill. Right. Exactly. I knew he would cooperate. Yeah. Yeah. And so that was part of it. And I like,

that's what Rico's biggest criticism is, is that they give people who cooperate way too lenient of sentences. Like Sammy the Bull. Right. He killed 12 people admittedly, and they let him off after like eight years. You can start a podcast. Exactly.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But anyways, I won the bet. Jack will never pay unfortunately. No, check your Venmo. You might get something sent to you from heaven.

So this is Tekashi getting the shit kicked out of him at a gym. You gotta put it on them. Oh, shit. There's no audio for some reason. The audio's the best part. Oh, my God. Look at them. Those head kicks are going to fuck him up.

You know who's most pissed off about this? Joey Swole. He's like the worst gym etiquette ever. Imagine it cuts to him. He goes, they should have their memberships revoked. I forgot who Joey Swole was for a second. Man, they are really knocking the shit.

I don't know. Audio's very good, yeah. I don't know why there's no audio for that one, but let's try another one. Hold on. Here's one. Bitch ass. You know, if I didn't know any better,

I would think this was some conservatives at a drag queen show. Drag queen story hour. Drag queen story hour. And he's like, I'm a rapper. I'm not a drag queen show the tracking story drag queen story hour and he's like i'm a rapper i'm not a drag queen damn look at they have an audience there's people in the hallway watching them oh man never seen a culture never thought we'd get to a point where people just post um like felonies publicly you know like this is this guy like wrote this on on snapchat like king shit we caught six nine slipping like he's a rat like it's like you're filming a crime.

Well, keep watching because this guy's hilarious. Take a picture. I want to be famous now, nigga. I want to be famous. Fuck, nigga. I don't know why that's the whole fucking video. Hold on. Let's do another one.

Here we go. Down there. Here's where they walk. Here, right here. Right here. All right, they're playing. Whoa, I haven't seen that footage. They're playing stupid music. Does it have a crown. Whoa, I haven't seen that footage. They're playing as stupid music.

I haven't seen that angle. Oh, this is a new angle. Man, there's so many angles. What did Roger Deakins shoot the fucking Tekashi 6ix9ine footage? Roger Deakins was like, I was at 24 Hour Fitness. I was in North Hollywood and this

clown man walked in and he got the shit kicked out of him all right we're gonna get taken off for that the music enough of the music well so anyways on the way out of the gym the guy starts going like it's all with music i can't yeah well the guy filming starts going like takashi like i'm, I'm a big fan. And Tekashi's like, still like, kind of wobbled from the beating. He's on the ground. And he's like, he just jumped me. He's like, why did you protect me? Yeah, exactly.

And it's quite an odd beating. It's an odd beating. Also, like, how did this unfold? Why is Tekashi going to an LA fitness, period? Yeah, he should have his own private gym. Why is Tekashi69 not living in Scottsdale, Arizona,

and his name is Marcus Smith? Why is he not just living a simple life and complaining about how the spaghetti just has ketchup on it? To be that publicly known as an enemy and to have ratted on a gang. It's insane he's alive. Let's be honest. Here he is talking.

You gotta put it on the thing. Yo, homie. I'm not gonna lie, bro. I'm a fan, bro. I'm a fan. I'm a fan. He does look like someone that would be on Santa Monica Boulevard. You can find Tekashi69 selling his ass on fucking Hollywood Island. He does look like someone that would be on Santa Monica Boulevard. I don't know why that. You could find Tekashi69 selling his ass on fucking Hollywood Island. He's like, hola, papi. He's like, hola, papi.

He goes, meet me in the back of the public storage. I'm in the alleyway of the public storage, papi. That's crazy. Look at that. He looks like a suicide squad character well good for those guys i guess good for the guy i mean yeah you you i like that i'm gonna i'm just i'm just gonna say it i i i enjoy that he got the shit kicked out of him because i don't like public rats yeah go be a rat, but the fact, if you're still trying to kind of have a semi-career in the public eye,

and you're the most infamous rat of the modern world, he is. As far as I know, Tekashi69 is the most public, famous rat of our modern day. And you can't just go to the 24-hour fitness on Hollywood. And you can't just go to the 24-hour fitness on Hollywood and look like that. Shave your fucking head. Get rid of your Skittles hair and

dress normally and get rid of the tattoos. See, that was him trying to return to a normal life. That was him probably after years of having security that he's paying and uh you know being very cautious it's him finally going like all right people they don't care anymore let me go to the la fitness and just do a long workout and then people start sending snapchat did you see your hashtag he's gonna hashtag on twitter takashi's at the la fitness yeah the wrong person

sees it and they're like okay let's go there and fucking pictures with them exactly i guarantee you he's gonna get shot to death and within five years if he keeps acting like this he's dead yeah did you see him working out at the gym no i can't find the footage but it's him like on the stairmaster and it's really it's one of those pathetic when you know when you see someone really pathetic on the stairmaster where they're holding the bars yeah they're like they're holding themselves up. Yeah, yeah. They look like they're working out their polio legs. They look like they're working out their little string cheese legs.

Yeah, yeah. They get out of their iron lung. Their legs that don't get messages sent to them from their brain anymore. Yeah, yeah. He looked like that. Wheelchair legs. Wheelchair legs. He had little flabby wheelchair legs.

Are you serious? This is real? You saw that video? He's on the Stairmaster, and he's holding the bars, and he's like... Oh, God. He's like... Also, like, just slow the Stairmaster down. You're defeating the purpose of working your legs out.

No, if you hold onto it, there's no point. Yeah. I've heard you can work out your... I mean, I work on the Stairmaster mostly. I do most of my work on the Stairmaster I'm trying to get a great big ass for those fucking maniacs There's a lot of crazy guys at the stops

and they pay you a little more if you have a good big juicy ass You know I'm a proud otter Jesus What should we get to now? What do we got? I want to talk about this, this is very funny this is an old video um and for some reason it's being displayed as it's in california but it's not i think it's in georgia i think it's in atlanta but it's about um renters rights cool homeowners

rights right cool and when you're in and uh or when you're a renter i always like there's gotta be zero in georgia this is amazing and uh this is an incredible incredible video and this is a this is a real problem in california and i guess it is in atlanta too because they have the same laws i guess um is this california this is atlanta i'm pretty sure this is atlanta i don't think this is california but maybe it is but i i saw this video months ago and i'm pretty sure it is Atlanta. I don't think this is California, but maybe it is. I saw this video months ago and I'm pretty sure it was Georgia. But it's you can't just let anyone move into your place. So she was doing an Airbnb

and the Airbnb guest decided to just stay a bit longer. They just stay. You can just kind of stay and you become a squatter and then the state just protects you and they don't...

It's illegal to kick you out because you've already lived there for longer than some period of time. It's like a month or something. You can just not pay and just keep living there and being like, oh, fuck yourself. I ain't doing shit. This is this woman. Don't trust no Airbnbs.

Don't trust no Airbnbs. Don't trust no Airbnbs. Okay. There you go, y'all. What? It's just a fat black woman walking through a kitchen. She's peacocking. And she's so cautiously strutting. She's walking like Superfly.

Right through the kitchen Of this woman's home Not remotely embarrassed Nope, going through the fridge Doing everything Going back to her room The belly walk Right to the kitchen I ain't going nowhere

I ain't going nowhere I ain't going nowhere So deal with it Deal with it. She disrespects, you know what I'm saying? And like I said, I've been trying to do this the right way. I went down there and got all the paperwork that I need to do to get her ass evicted out of my house. But that shit is a process.

I had to go through protocols. I was a stupid, illegal, blah, blah, blah, blah, bull. And then I just got them. The police just left my house and i'm like get this at my house they're like oh she's a tenant now she's a tenant why are you talking get back to your room. Yeah, exactly. Just stick to your salt. Go to your room. That's all I know. Yo, door. This is my house.

How about you get the out of my house? How about that's what you do? How about you get the out of my house? How about you get the out of my house? Okay, I'm going to close the door. I'm going to watch my stories. And I'm going to eat these motherfucking lemon pepper wet. and I'm going to eat these motherfucking lemon pepper wet. Ever heard of

the AC bitch? She goes, by the way, I got an order from J.R. Crickets coming over later. You better answer the motherfucking door, baby. That's crazy. 74 during the summertime? I don't think so. She goes, I'm going to turn this motherfucking thermostat down. This is my house.

That's crazy. Imagine hijacking somebody's house and being that aggressive about it. And being that casual about it and being like, no, you ain't kicking me out. This is my house now, bitch. This is my house. I love that lady. That lady kind of kicks ass. They're both amazing.

Here's the thing. Why can't you do this? Why can't that woman, the owner of the house, right? Trying to get this person out of her place. Yeah. Who's refusing to leave. Go change all the locks. You can't do that.

I know immediately you can't do that. Oh, you can't? Yeah, that's illegal. Illegal to change the locks on your own home? Yes. If you're keeping someone as a tenant out can't yeah that's illegal illegal to change your own home yes if the if you're keeping someone as a tenant out that way that's illegal you okay so you go you don't pay the heat bill you don't pay the air conditioning you can do yeah it's illegal too i'm pretty sure how's it illegal to not pay for things that are like an inhospitable look you

you create an in hot you it's hospital hospitability law yeah like you can't you can't shut down essential services. Why can't this woman get this bitch out of her fucking house? Shit, I don't know. And it could be, if it is California, that chick is fucked. Like, there's, dude, you have to, like, I was looking into eviction laws and shit, and, like, hospitability laws and all that stuff.

Like, there's so many things you have to do to just not get your fucking... How's that hospitability if she's not paying rent? When do they take that into account? Because she still qualifies as a tenant. Yeah. If she's not paying rent? Legally, she still qualifies due to some very insanely advantageous law for

renters. What if you go, I'm not hot, and I'm not cold, I'm not paying this, and I'm the only one that pays, I'm just gonna not pay the bill on that, and then I'm just gonna leave town. There's actually fucking groups of men you can hire because not only... That's legal. Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

It's legal to hire a gang. Exactly, no. But say you even get all the eviction paperwork done and they can be evicted, right? Have fun trying to get the sheriff's deputies to do that. Like, it's so hard. There's a waiting list. There's actually...

I know a cop who comes to the bar and he moonlights as a guy who has a group of other cops that will literally come by and evict crackheads from houses. After all the eviction paperwork's done, all that shit, he goes in with a private squad of guys, waits till they're all out, chains all the locks, all that stuff. And he moonlights, so he fucks them. He fucks them, yeah. He hangs out with them on a beach and cradles them.

He jacks them off on a beach. He fucks them. He hangs out with them on a beach and cradles them. He jacks them off on a beach. But, like, the, um, but this dude is telling me stories about getting, like, shot at and shit by methics. Some of them won't even leave the house because they know the locks are going to get changed. And they'll, like, barricade themselves inside with, like, guns and shit. It's wild, man.

Well, the best part of this story for me is the fact that we, you know, for sure that as soon as, like, this camera ended, the next night they were like drinking mimosas together in their best mood. They were having fun. The next night they were like drinking mimosas and they were watching like Basketball Wives. They were like, baby, I could get J.R. Smith. Speaking of being evicted,

Joey is being evicted right now. Fantastic. Wrongfully evicted. Not the story. Not you getting evicted. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, he'll fight it and he'll win. Yeah, kicks ass.

Let's get into this. Yeah, so how many years ago did we break that TV? About a year ago. Maybe not even a year yet and so it's on the page on the patreon check out the patreon there's video of joey breaking a tv of his apartment complex with a with a giant gold great dane statue it's a statue of a great dane he brings it into the room he brings it in like multiple times and then finally on that third time he he he accidentally stumbles and smashes it into like 500 pounds like a 72 inch

tv in their home theater like the tv so of the apartment complex right so um and they caught us so so yeah yeah i so i see the video i don't remember this and devin sends me the video and it's very funny it's on patreon and i realized i broke the tv and now i have to make a decision how am i going to respond to this? Do I admit what I did or do I just wait for them to catch me? And we go, just don't even act like you have any clue what's happening.

Exactly. So that's what I did. And then like two weeks later, I get a phone call from the management and they say, hey, you broke the TV. We busted you. And I never admit to doing it in writing,

but I was just like, okay, well send me the details and we'll figure this out. They end up sending me a bill for like $7,000, which included the sound system, which made no sense. They were trying to get a new sound system. So they replaced the TV with a newer, better TV that was more expensive than the one that was allegedly broken by me. And then the surround sound was no longer compatible with the new TV that they bought. So they're like, now you have to pay for the surround sound too.

So we're mid-dispute about surround sound. If I'm paying for anything, what am I paying for? And in the middle of this dispute, I walk into the office at some point, and it's all new people. And they tell me that the, the, the building's been bought by a new company.

Right. And so I go like, Oh wait, so it was bought by tech talk shoes there. So I, I, I'm like, wait,

so is anybody here from the old management? And they go, no, it sounds like some tricks are going be happening right so i go i and they're like why i go oh nothing no don't worry about it not a big deal i was just curious so anyways i'm like okay well if a company left um if the management company left they're not like passing over a database if there's video footage. No, they just,

all those people leave. They don't give a shit. There's no email server being passed over. They don't care. There's no video. They're just cogs in the system, yeah. If there were surveillance, it's probably instantly deleted.

Yep. So they don't have to pay for the storage. Of course, yeah. And so I'm like, well, I'll just pretend like this never happened. And so this went on for another eight months or something, six, eight months of me pretending with the new management that this never happened and then so finally I went back

to my apartment and there was a lawsuit stuffed into the door handle and I picked it up and it just like you're being sued by the apartment building and so I went in I read the thing and I'm like well it says it's suing me for not paying rent. And I paid rent. So this doesn't really make sense. So I contacted the management company and they said like, oh, well, no. Yeah. So like you owe like 7K, which is what they were trying to charge me for the surround sound on the TV.

Thinking it's rent. Thinking it was rent. Yeah. So once I informed them or once they eventually realized that it wasn't rent, and it was like a slam dunk wrongful eviction for me, they backed off and they got really scared, actually. Of course. I fucking bet.

You're going to sue them, right? I talked to my sweet friend Pooja, who's a legendary lawyer in SoCal, and I said, can I countersue? She's like, of course. You can definitely countersue. Fuck yeah like, of course. You can definitely countersue. Fuck yeah, dude. Get Jacob and Ronnie on this shit. So they dropped, they already dropped the lawsuit.

That doesn't matter. You still sue them for emotional damage. Yeah, that you got panicked. And then you say you passed out that night. You hit your head. We can beat you up tonight. Show them your Lunesta. It's not quite over, though, because after I owned them big time on the wrongful eviction stuff

and had them, like, cowering, then she's like, okay, but yeah, but you do still owe us for the TV. And you go, what TV? And that's what I said. And she goes, like, well, this was on the ledger. You're responsible for the TV. Like, do we have to take this to small claims? And she goes like, well, this was on the ledger. You're responsible for the TV. Like, you know, do we have to take this to small claims?

And she starts getting her confidence back because she realizes she's got something on me. Right. After being a huge coward all call. We're taking this to Judge Joe Brown. Exactly. Judge Joe Brown's like, I charge Joey LaFleur breaking a TV. You are found guilty. You will serve a maximum of life but then so i was like she's like what do you want to do should we do a payment plan like

she's trying to figure out payment plans suck me off yeah so i'm like payment plan and then so she's like trying to make me admit to by the way for a that has nothing, these new people have nothing to do with it. There's already a new TV in there. It's been there for nine months. Well, they inherited the debt. It doesn't matter. It's a apartment complex. I'm sorry.

I mean, it's not going to... Unless you actually sue them, I'll delete that. Well, I know you're not going to delete it. I won't. I don't delete anything. You've been through this a million times. I don't delete anything.

I'm sorry. What I say, I say. Anyway, keep going. I'm about to say something terrible about Devin, so he has to go back and do it. Actually, I might. Let me think about something really bad. Don't do it. Well, then will you edit?

I need to edit that out? Yeah. Yeah. You're doxing him, dude. The name of the place? Yeah. really bad. Don't do it. Don't do it. Well, then will you edit? I need to edit that out? Yeah. Yeah. You're doxing him, dude. The name of the place? Yeah. All right. I'll edit it out.

It's where he lives. There's a number of them. No, no. The only reason I'm doing this, and we have to edit this out, is because you can keep some of this in. Well, no. Actually, we have to edit all this out. No, we don't.

No, we don't. Edit it. We just have to edit the name out. That's it. I'm going to say your phone number. We just have to edit the name out. That's it. I'm going to say your phone number. We just have to edit the name out. I'll edit the name out, Joey. Why are you still doing this?

Just so you have to do it. I'll edit the name out. Devin's phone number is 323- That's Devin's phone number. I just said I'd edit the name out. Now you have to. Now I have to edit that out too? Yes.

Why? Because you have to edit a little bit more out too so I can keep explaining. I don't want somebody to tell the apartment that I'm admitting to breaking the TV, which is what I'm doing. Yeah. So anyways, that's why I kept saying a legend.

I said I'd edit the name of the place out. Okay, no, perfect. Okay, now you have to. But anyways, okay. I have to do that and I have to do two things. And start. out. Okay, no, perfect. Okay, now you have to. But anyways, okay. I have to do that, and I have to do two things. And start. No, it's one big edit. Okay, and start.

And start. So I basically said, like, okay, you guys want to sue me in small claims? I'm like, you know what? I don't know if I... Maybe I'll do a payment plan, or maybe we can go to small claims. I go, before I make my decision, do me a favor and send me all the evidence that you have that I broke your tv because that's going to affect my decision fuck it and then she started panicking like oh we don't

have like that's legacy dude the previous place right of course yeah and then so i'm like okay so you have no evidence so you have no evidence i'm like well that's gonna feel weird in the courtroom yeah and so anyways then she became a cuck again and i kind of checkmated her are you So you have no evidence. I'm like, well, that's going to feel weird in the courtroom. Yeah. And so anyways, then she became a cuck again, and I kind of checkmated her. Are you going to sue? No, I think I'll probably. Threaten to. Send a letter of intent. I've already threatened to sue.

Yeah, so I'll probably let them get away with just dropping all the charges. That's good. Yeah. That's a win. You guys want to do a little John's Gun Corner? You got questions lined up? Yeah. Alright.

Do we have new music? I'm kind of feeling the classics. Yeah, so do I. That's nice. Oh, wait. Where's the handgun? Well, it's John's Gun Corner. Oh, yeah.

It's John's Gun Corner. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh, yeah. John, wake up. He doesn't know a goddamn thing about guns, but the people ask him questions and he gets made fun of oh yeah

he wears a Mike Tyson shirt like Mike Tyson wouldn't rape him at all speaking to a pigeon Mike Tyson would rape anybody Mike Tyson would rape you and then he would have a conversation with a pigeon. Mike Tyson could rape anybody. Mike Tyson would rape you,

and then he would have a conversation with a pigeon, which he would enjoy more than a conversation with you. No. Oh, yeah. No. It's Chuck's Gun Corner. He would enjoy a conversation. Shut your fucking mouth, John.

Dude. Oh, yeah. All right. Wow, another edition of another edition Another edition I'm getting burned out on those Me too They're getting tough It's tough

It's even getting tough To read these I'm sick of it It's getting hard to read The questions Mike Tyson would like To talk to me Mike Tyson

Mike Tyson He'd want to talk to you About what you know What prep to give his friend He's got AIDS He's got a friend with AIDS Okay Because he doesn't discriminate Maggie Johnson Alright yeah But he would think You're disgusting for some reason He would think you're disgusting What prep to give his friend? He's got AIDS? He's got a friend with AIDS. Okay. Because he doesn't discriminate.

Maggie Johnson. All right. But he would think you're disgusting for some reason. He would think you're disgusting. No interest in talking to John. Oh, come on. Okay. So, first of all, opening up, shout out to Anna.

Oh, you put the cookie up on the thing. Oh, yeah. Lovely woman. Tell me that, Joey. Take the AR. Thank you. Big shout out to a wonderful fan of the show, Anna Pitt. Anna Pittman.

Anna Pittman. She's Anna Pitt. Anna underscore Pitt. Buy her cookies. I'll put that full screen. She made us a beautiful cookie for John's Gun Corner. Buy her cookies. And she's incredibly talented.

Scroll down a little bit and you can see her business. Dude. Modern stem sugar. Dude, she even put the fucking gay cholo drink in it. What a cool chick. Thank you, Anna. I don't know what state she's in. She can't right now. She's waiting for a food

license so she can sell food out of her state. Follow that. If you live in her state, buy some food. If you know how to get her a license to sell out of state, find her and do it. She's great. Yeah, she gave me a mustache like a silent movie actor.

Thank you, Anna, though. That is truly amazing. You made a lemon party one, too. Alright, what do we got? Have this back, too. Alright, thank you. A? All right, John. Have this back, too. Take the AR. All right, thank you. Good.

A couple guns pointed at us. First question from the official mom of the podcast, Renee P. Love you, Renee. Okay, since Sean won't heed my advice about not smack-talking Marines. I did more than smack-talk. Okay, stop. Let me finish. When he is eventually kidnapped and tortured by an angry and rogue Marine

that will not want a blowjob, what gun will he choose for his own murder? Well, Marines aren't smart enough to kidnap anybody. The only gun John uses is a salt gun for his food. Like the ones

that Gil flies with. What gun would I use to free myself? No, what gun would you give a Marine to kill you if you had to pick? Oh, if I had to pick one? You know, just fucking you know, just shoot me in the head with a shotgun. Very good.

Make it good. Shotgun. Yeah. Okay, next question from fan favorite, JP Ryder Morgan. I fucking love you, JP. You're the man. I love JP Ryder Morgan. He says, okay, Joey, here we go again.

Here we go again. He goes, dear John, thanks for joining my live. It was cool. It was awesome. JP reviews action figures and shit. It's fucking awesome, and he's thanks for joining my live. It was cool. It was awesome. JP reviews action figures and shit. It's fucking awesome. And he's just a really great guy. You should all follow him on Instagram.

Now to business. You are a Secret Service type of guard, and your job is to protect Devin from Joey, who is charging at him with a bottle of mustard. How would you stop him? Non-lethal force, or would you use a gun? Again, boys, cheers. Love you guys. And Devin, your voice is incredible on

this song. I would just kick a Sibian in front of Joey and it's kind of like he had no choice but to just sit down and turn it on full max and just ride it until he came. I would sit on it? Oh my god, that's not okay for you to say. Maybe like a big fat dildo and you just fucking ride that shit.

This is a weird diversion. Usually you do that. You're being strange. You've been off all night. You seem to have forgotten. Let's get in his head even though he's been pretty good. Let's make him think he's been bad.

I'm gray right now. Let's make him think he's been bad even though he's been pretty good. He's a weak minded individual. Let's make him think he's been bad. I'm gray right now. Let's make him think he's been bad, even though he's been pretty good. I'm putting him on my guard. I'm putting him on my guard. He's a weak-minded individual. He's got a weak backbone. You can't get in my head by saying, even though he's been good. What?

Go. I think that was the... Is that it? No. No, no, no. Sorry. That was the end of that question. So next question. Hello, John of John's Gun Corner.

I come to you seeking advice. Okay. What weapon would you attempt to use in a combative situation against Mr. John Wick, a.k.a. the Baba Yaga? And why wouldn't you survive Mr. Wick's wrath? Mr. Wick. Cup? Mr. Wick. John Wick would kill me with a fucking knitting needle or something.

That is true. We know, but try to play along for once. I would use a nuclear bomb. That's the only thing I'd be able to kill John Wick with. Well. You gotta score sure with this guy. He's unstoppable. Yeah, John Wick, the only thing you could stop him with is like a nuke.

Like a bomb. Like a big giant. A bomb. Okay, a couple more. Suicide vest. How fast can John unload an AR-15? I'm assuming fairly quickly judging by the amount of loads he swallows every day. Who knew cum could make you so fat?

Yeah. From Brandon. Brandon, you can fucking eat my ass, dude. Okay. Wow. That's mean. Yeah. Suck me. Brandon, you can fucking eat my ass, dude. Okay. Wow. That's mean. Yeah. Suck me.

Oh, yeah. Got no respect for the listener. Zero respect for Brandon. Well, there's a big man coming. He's coming around the band. I love how you kick into this whenever the guitar kicks in. There's a big man coming. And he's coming around the band.

He ate all our food oh yeah it's john's gun corner oh yeah john's gun corner oh he's a big man from glendale california got no experience with guns oh yeah yeah he pretends he's a big, tough guy, but he really comes from a loo. Don't do that. What? Nah, I'm just saying. You thought I was about to personally attack him? No, no. What?

I said I don't do that. I'm not fucking. You pretend like you're. I'm a vulnerable angel. No, you act like you're a big gun master. What are you talking about? You act like you're a big, tough guy, but really you're just an L.A. liberal fag. He went on to a safari once,

and now he thinks he's tough. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. Even the hyena's laughing, John, boy. Can I have a part of that? What? Oh, John wants a beer. The toughest thing he ever did was drink an IPA.

Oh, yeah. The toughest thing he ever did is not fuck his boyfriend. The toughest thing John's ever done in his whole goddamn fucking life is drink an India Pale Ale. A, Chris, and A, B, V. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. And that's it What's the question, Joey?

Oh, we have one more? Rapid City Roundup We can do Rapid City Roundup whenever you want I apologize for the lackluster songs today No, they're great How long have we done so far? We're good, we can wrap it up Let's get it going

I have a long Rapid City Roundup and I have a short one Let's do the Rapid City Roundup Short one or the long one?. Let's do the Rapid City Roundup. Short one or the long one? Whatever. Let's do the short one. All right. This is great.

It's the Rapid City Roundup, boy. Oh, yeah. When you're from Rapid City, South Dakota, the only black thing you ever met is the hills. Woo-hoo! Oh, yeah. It's the Rapid City Roundup. It's the Rapid City Roundup. People from Rapid City, South Dakota, sending questions.

Sending their, they're fighting their dads. They're fighting their moms. They're fighting everybody at the bar. It's the Rapid City Roundup. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. It's the Rapid City Roundup. It's the Rapid City Roundup. None, yeah. Uh-huh. It's Rapid City Roundup. It's Rapid City Roundup. None of you will ever meet Kevin Costner.

And that's a fact. He's the only person you ever want to meet. And he'll never touch you. He'll never shake your hand. Uh-huh. Oh, yeah. It's the... Oh, ha, ha.

The mayor is a mountain lion. The mayor is a mountain lion The mayor is a bear The mayor is a pack of wolves The mayor's in your hair You don't know where he is because he doesn't exist It's a lawless land called Rapid City, South Dakota Oh yeah Woo!

That was great Yeah God, that was good. Thank you. I'm going to download that. It was definitely on... Put that on SoundCloud. It was definitely on tune. It was in tune and on beat.

I'm a great... I'm a fucking virtuoso. You are a tour. That sounded amazing. Goddamn virtuoso. And I've been getting a lot of messages saying, like, Devin is very good at singing. Yeah.

And we want to hear him on, like, Spotify. Recorded as a single. Oh, I've heard that. He's good on his feet. I've heard that, too. Thank you. But so... I love guns! I love guns!

Look at this adorable little cutie pie. This little little pigeon, dude. We've lost our baby. I can't wait for John Wick tonight. Neither can I. Neither can I. Neither can I. So for this Rapid City Roundup, this is going to be a short one.

Next week is going to be a very good one. Sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. So this is going to be one. So the first Rapid City Roundup, I told a story about my friends who stole milk from a baby. Second Rapid City Roundup was the Bone Crusher. And people loved the Bone Crusher. And we called our friend Brock. It was interactive.

And we interacted with people from Rapid City. And people loved it. This one, it's just going to be a quick one. And then next week, we're going to have a crazy. So I'm going to call my mom. And we're going to have a crazy. Oh, hell yeah to call my mom and we're going to have a crazy. Oh hell yeah. I'm going to reveal something very embarrassing about myself. What?

What? Come on dude. On the next one because I realize like it's kind of hypocritical to do roundups about my friends and not be willing to do embarrassing ones. Are you sure? And by the way I'm embarrassing myself constantly on this fucking podcast. That is true. But so this one's not embarrassing to me.

Next week is going to be the one where it's like I look like a fucking maniac. Okay. Okay. You never look like that on the show. No, but I look really bad on the next one. Joey, you're like the sanest guy now. But so I texted my mom who listens to the podcast and has been buying counterfeit merchandise. Love you, Julie.

Love you, Julie. Sweet Julie. Love you, Julie. Sweet woman. She has been, she found counterfeit merchandise. Love you, Julie. Sweet Julie, love you, Julie. She has been, she found counterfeit merchandise. She's buying mugs. Red bubble. Red bubble. She sent me a magnet. Cock suckers.

So she likes the podcast and she's obviously from Rapid City and she's funny. She understands comedy and stuff. So I messaged her and I'm like, hey, did you hear the last episode? Did you hear the roundup? She's yeah it was very funny blah blah i go do you have an idea for the next roundup because i need something and here's what she says i'm gonna read it verbatim i'm changing the names um because like sure they're real people. So she goes, what's a good fake name? Just give me one real quick.

Johnson. Yeah. All right. We'll call Rick Johnson. She goes, I was thinking the Rick Johnson story. And I go, what was the Rick Johnson story again? And she says, verbatim, he's been out of town for a while and really wanted to get drunk at men's day.

Men's day? What? What is men's day? In the village? I made the exact same joke. At Arrowhead Country Club, they have a day called men's day where literally women

aren't allowed to golf. And they're like, we're doing this because we're straight as hell yeah and uh actually when we when me and my dad picked you up from the airport yeah that was men's day no it was like uh i think it was like men's day was the next day or something you made made Devin miss men's day? No, no, but I was saying to Devin, I was like, I called it men's night on accident. And I was like, so I was to my dad. Men's night's a different thing. I was like, what do you have to do tomorrow, dad? Is men's night, is what I said.

And he's like, it's called men's day. And I'm like, oh yeah, oh yeah, because men's night sounds so much gayer. They're both gay. Your dad's just like, I only have sex at night. But so that's what men's day is. So Rick Johnson had been out of town for a while and really wanted to get drunk at men's day. He was golfing with Brock's dad and two other men.

Oh, wow. Brock's dad had the cart girl follow them around, and they drank a ridiculous amount of fireball shots. But the cart girl was secretly giving Brock's dad, who had to drive to Denver after golf, shots of tea. Shots of tea. Like tea. Oh, tea. Fake shots of booze. Oh, and he got fake drunk?

Yeah, so he was giving Brock's dad and the other guys fake shots. But they had a placebo thing where they pretended to be drunk. No, no, no, no, no. So Rick Johnson was getting real. Rick Johnson was not in on the joke. He was getting real booze. Okay. Okay.

So after 18 holes, Brock's dad and the others left, and Rick Johnson kept playing. Rick Johnson crashed head-on into one of the 700-pound T-markers in his golf cart. Eventually, they made it back to the clubhouse, and Rick went into the locker room. He had some sort of alcohol-induced seizure and ended up wedged. What? Such a casual way to... Yeah, this is like her wackies. It's a perfect roundup, actually.

He had a seizure. We all laughed. Everyone went home. She understands the show very well, actually. This is a perfect. We all laughed. Everyone went home. She understands the show very well actually. This is a perfect roundup. So then she goes he had some sort of alcohol induced seizure and ended up

wedged in between a bench and the lockers. So he's in the locker room of Arrowhead and there's like a bench like in any locker room and he's stuck. He's like really fat room of Arrowhead, and there's a bench like in any locker room, and he's stuck. He's like, I guess he's really fat, and he's literally stuck. Yeah, he was so hammered, so he was stuck.

So two doctors walked in and found him. He was stuck, and they couldn't get him out, so they had to get people from upstairs to help before the ambulance got there. When they got him out, he peed himself. He couldn't drive a car or drink alcohol for six months. His BAC was really, really high. He had just, he just had his first beard last week. And then she goes, not a very nice story

now that I'm thinking about it. LOL. LOL. All I think about is the Native American homeless people in Rapid City listening to stories like this. Being like, yeah,

that guy runs the town. He's doing this on our land. We're the assholes. We're the drugs. Oh, I'm the asshole. Because I like to drink a steel reserve at 2 p.m. Rick Johnson's getting stuck in between fucking the lockers and a vending machine because he's too fat.

Anyway. Yeah, so next week there's going to be one with a phone call and a big story. Next week. Check us out next week. Anyway, guys be one with a phone call and a big story. Next week. Check us out next week. Anyway, guys, patreon.com slash hatewatchpodcast. Check it out. There's a great new episode on there.

Play till the police come. John does. There's a crazy footage of John in New Orleans, and there's a big Red Table-esque fight resolution between Devin and I. A lot of people like that. A lot of people liked that. A lot of people thought it was sweet, how we made up for the mustard fight on the thing. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't even listen

to it. I heard a bunch of people message me and they were like, hey, that was such a nice kind of insight into a real friendship. Oh, wait. We're the only podcast with a true friendship going on. This and Lemon Party, but I firmly believe we're the only true friends. Maybe there's a few podcasts out in Philly that are real friends.

But other than that, I think we are the only people and them that are doing it right. West of the Mississippi. Except for Joe Rogan and Brian Redman. West of the Mississippi. Except, of course, for Rogan and Brian Redman. Oh, fuck. That's it. Joey Arloflor on Instagram.

John Badman on Instagram Two D's Two D's Hit me up with all your bullshit Devin James Cost on Instagram Thank you for listening folks Woo Woo

You have a good night It's the Hey Watch Podcast Thank you baby Bye bye Oh yeah Uh huh