Hate Watch with Devan Costa - Towbaby

Episode Date: January 16, 2023

Rick and Morty are pedophiles, Jeremy Renner got eaten alive by a snowplow, a married man hits on a woman at the gym, a tow truck driver that thinks he's a baby Get weekly bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/HateWatchPodcast Join the Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/hatewatchpod/

It's good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that. I know. But lately I'm getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over. Many Americans, I think, feel that way. Looks, Joey, you look like a daytime, you look like a daytime, like, shock jock guy.

Joey looks like he works for Stern in 1996. I don't know what Stern you guys were watching. No? I don't think so. You actually look like you sell pills. I do look like I sell. I killed Mac Miller with fentanyl. You look like a pill salesman that was exiled from Pittsburgh.

Well, I just woke up. This is what happens when I'm forced to re-record a podcast. And I wonder why we're re-recording. Somebody to our far left kind of maybe did a bad, bad thing on the last episode. We literally can't release it. Because I want my friend

to stay on the streets. The problem with this is that we're making it sound worse than what it actually was. It was horrible. It's pretty bad. You did a horrible thing. I woke up the next day and I rapidly realized what had happened. John was like, what are we doing about that episode? And the whole night you were gaslighting me. Joey's gaslighting me.

Joey's such a bully. Joey's like bullying me about like, he goes, tomorrow, what are you going to do with that episode? And I'm like, I don't know. I have to think about it, man. That was a lot. That was a lot. I don't know what, I mean, I looked it up. That was a lot. I don't know. I looked it up. It's a federal crime.

Joey goes, so tomorrow, you're going to tell me you're not putting it out. So you're not going to think about it. He was all pissed off. You're not thinking about it. You already have it in your mind you're not putting it out. I think it should have been.

I would have risked it. I was the one who would have gotten in trouble. But you have a death wish. Yeah, you're insane. You really want to be taken. You want to be taken into custody. Yeah. It's like a fetish. Joey wants the picture of him with the bulletproof vest on in the jail. You want the perp walk.

I want an Eric Rudolph perp walk. They put the vest on me. You want that sick sweater they gave Koberger. That green. I want the anti-suicide vest. The anti-suicide vest. I wonder if they sell those at like A&F. That's what it is?

I thought it was a bulletproof vest. No, that's for suicide. That's cool. How to be bulletproof. There's like guys in prison with guns. In case why Gary Y happens to him on the way to jail or some shit. What type of hitman would just shoot him in the chest? You shoot him right ran the fucking head.

I don't know. Anyway. You're a psychopath. Anyway, we had a really rough... I'm going to release the Patreon where we are chastising Joey for his criminal ways. Yeah. But I just... I literally...

It's unusable, the public one. Maybe there's like 30 minutes that I could put out at some point, but we talk about this specific entity for too long. It's impossible to edit around. And then I just know, even if I did somehow figure out a way to edit around it, people would call the place.

Oh, yeah. See, Devin is under the impression that the listeners are a bunch of snitches and they're going to listen and hear and report us to the FBI. We can't account for 4,000 people. Most of them aren't. But some are.

You know my DMs? The insanity in my DMs now? I'm getting calls by some crazy lady in the middle of the night on my Instagram. You know when they call you on Instagram? We're not even friends. She calls me. I look at her page today. It's just a bunch of... The background of every picture is a Confederate flag.

And there's a, there's a, there's a child on the floor. There's always a child on the floor. You know, it's what they're going to do is they're going to call the place. Cause they think we're going to like, be like,

yeah, dude, like good job. Yeah. Like it's going to be like a big, like Howard Stern's penis moment. It's just not going to be good. He did it on my phone too.

Yeah. That's the best. The, too. I'm terrified. The best part is I'm just, Devin's going to get a knock from the FBI. Well, it was spontaneous. The actual criminal part was spontaneous. It was such a nice, funny prank call. It was great.

It was really great. You took it zero to 100 in half a second. Yeah. There's something wrong with your brain. There's something where there's... It's true. I was drinking. It's truly crazy how quickly you go to that.

It's wild. I looked it up the next day. I told five, six people about it. People that have been in podcasting for a while and they've done some crazy things. They've had some visits by the FBI. They go, that would be absolutely insane of you to post. You'd be a complete idiot. It'd be funny though.

It would be, but I care. I want Joey to be my friend for the rest of my life. I'm not trying to visit him at fucking... Apple Valley. Yeah, Jesus Christ. I'm not trying to talk to him through glass. Imagine you would get a low-level penitentiary. You'd be in a camp.

Listen, they're putting me, hopefully, in ADX Florence Supermax. Joey's in space jail uh but now i guess i apologize i ruined the whole podcast we're all recording this is sunday night at like 9 30 it's so funny because i picked joey up at the arts district that i just i i he gets the i i see him he's sitting down underneath this like tent uh outside of a coffee shop. And he looks at me. He does that wave where he's like, hey. And I was just like, oh, there's an overwhelming sense of guilt this entire drive back.

Was there? There was. Joey's just going, how you doing? Joey is kind of acting like when a dog is taking a shit around you. Exactly. He's got to rub his nose in it. Both ways. Well, I felt bad because it was your phone.

And then it ruined the whole podcast. So we had to come back and do another one of these. It was funny up until the criminal part of it. I apologize. I was drinking. There's some casualties of war. The criminal part of it was the funniest part. That's the fucked up thing. It was literally one of the funniest things

I've ever heard in my life. I laughed so hard I was dry heaving. That's why I still say release it and I'm fine with it. I've never had that, where I felt like my stomach was going to come out of my fucking mouth. Maybe one day when the statute of limitations is up. 17 years.

In seven years, I'll put it on the Patreon. But at least, you know, it's funny. It's funny how things work out. We were re-recording, and some things have happened. You guys see what's going on with that Justin Roiland guy? Oh, yeah. I heard a little bit. Yeah, the creator of Rape and Morty.

Very good. What, did he rape someone? No, but he's using women's heads to open doors. I met a... He's treating the writer's room of Rick and Morty like they're Tina Turner. I met a girl who matched with him on Tinder. And it was like the fucking weirdest thing I've ever seen in my life. That seems to be a lot of it. Let's look at some

of these stories I was looking at. He's sending the most autistic fucking messages. Oh, he's out of his mind. He's a retard. He's like a pedophile that like does like Chinese voices. He's trying to like court women. He's like if he's like a pedophile that like he's like if Nick Mullen was a pedophile.

He's doing like, he's like, oh, Mr. Honey, for fucking your pussy. Is he going after 14-year-olds? Look at this. This is a conversation with a 16-year-old. Oh, good job, buddy. Oh, yeah. Sorry, at the airport. It's insane in the membrane. What time is it there now?

She goes, 11.37. He goes, oh, oh, so, so red. It's so red. And me so Chinese. She goes, I have school tomorrow, sad face. He goes, oh, so, so red. It's so red and me so Chinese. What? She goes, I have school tomorrow, sad face. He goes, oh, school tomorrow? Oh, no. Wait, what?

This is real. She goes, F my life. He goes, you should just run away from home and go to sex slavery, you stupid fucking stupid faggot bitch. Jesus Christ. He goes, just kidding. And she goes, you wish, you stupid bitch. Like, she doesn't know what's going on what the fuck

well you know he's a drunk that's what I hear yeah then it keeps going yeah would you do video game reviews and stuff like that I bet you'd do good

she goes yeah just playing games and shit he goes then once you turn 18 you just start cam whoring yeah good job Justin whoa buddy

that's good stuff what a great guy Morty why are you such a Morty why are you such a gentleman Morty you're a stuff. Morty. Why are you such a jailbait? Morty. Why are you such a jailbait, Morty? You're a pedophile, Morty. Oh, Rick.

I don't know, Rick. I don't know, Rick. Why are you such a jailbait? What's wrong with you in that regard? You should grow older, you dumb bitch. It's like Satan's talking to young women. Just the king of nerds

is just, he's really let everybody down. You know what sucks about this is we can't even, Callahan's not around to interview him. That would be a funny kind of, nice little like, it would be like the Spider-Man meme. Like when Mike Tyson and Evander Holyfield got back together.

Then he keeps calling her Jailbait. Is it cool being a Jailbait? Does the FBI follow you around arresting all the men you sleep with? Good. Maybe I will. I want to meet you in real life, Jailbait, so I can't help you not be a homo. I'm Atlanta drunk. Yeah.

He was 35 years old when he was saying these things. No, but when did the show come out? Oh, God. When we were like 22, 23. So 2015, before 2015? Like 2015. Was the show out when this was going on? Yeah.

No, yeah, this is from years ago. This is from 2015. But the show was out when this was happening. I believe so, yes. Okay. I don't think it was as big of a hit as it was. No, no. But he had enough to get checks to like message him or whatever. He had so, yes. I don't think it was as big of a hit as it was. No, no. But he had enough to get checks

to like, Master Trimmer or whatever. He had a blue check. It's vindicating. You know, I never really cared for that show. I never got into it.

I know the first few seasons are really good. The Pickle Rick stuff, go fuck yourself. Yeah, no. Well, it got co-opted by all those guys that wear Cookie Monster hats

that they get from Target and shit. Yeah, it just turned into a Sriracha t-shirt. The whole show is just, might as well be written by the Target young adult section. This is another,

people are just sharing all their messages. This is 2014. He goes, you were great. She goes, so are you. He goes, are you going to get Morty tattooed on your boob licking your nipple?

If not, then who? You should do it. That's not that bad. I mean, odd. It's odd. He's really into weird things. Relax, pal. But that's not even it. I mean, odd. It's odd. He's really into weird things. Relax, pal. But that's not even it.

He's, like I said, he's like Jake LaMotta. He's been fucking beating women. Oh, yeah. He might go to prison. Surprising. Rick and Morty co-creator Justin Roiland faces felony domestic violence charges. Justin Roiland, the star co-creator

of the animated comedy series Rick and Morty, has been charged with felony domestic violence in Orange County in connection with a 2020 incident. Of course, they're looking forward to clearing his name. Yada, yada, yada. What is felony domestic violence? It's when you fuck someone up.

Like a serious beating. It's like when you put their head in the car door. It's really bad. It's like Boardwalk Empire level beatings. James Gandolfini in True Romance. Yes, exactly. It's a True Romance beating.

Which is crazy for such a weak nerd. I think all these guys are inside really angry. Their moms and shit. Yeah, they have big rage issues. Him and Dan Harmer just in the parking lot in between lunch breaks, just throwing a woman's head around like a football. Just fucking taking turns

just whipping women. You know, I get it. It's fun. It's kind of fun though, because it's like, you know, one of our close friends, Joey and I, we know somebody that just got a job on Rick and Morty, and I think it has to do with this. Like, that's kind of how things work out in this town town in Hollywood. You just gotta hope your superior

winds up raping somebody. Everyone's kind of just waiting for the person above them to commit a sex crime. Then there's a vacuum. And then you fill a slot. Inevitably, you commit a sex crime. Somebody replaces you. That's the economy.

The currency is screenshotted messages. Yeah. They should change money into just screenshotted DMs that show criminal behavior of somebody. That should be the new currency. Just hand out different DMs from criminals. And it'll sink the U.S. dollar because it's so valuable.

It's so valuable. There's got to be a bunch of guys hacking emails that have all these things just stacked up. Yeah. Some of them have nudes of celebrities and shit. Like you're paying your mortgage

and you pay them with like a you pay them with like a screenshot of like fucking The Rock admitting to rape. A little bit of a hot can of rape on your ass. Yeah. Wells Fargo's like

alright we can do a lot with those. You know how much TMZ's gonna pay us if we give them this DM? It's wild. The Rock is a rapist? Knowing The Rock, they probably raped a fucking Statue of Liberty or some fucking giant building.

Every movie now The Rock does is just him versus a wall. Yeah, it's called The Skyscraper or something. Yeah, it's The him versus a wall. Yeah, it's called the skyscraper or something. It's The Rock versus a bridge. He's fighting a bridge. Yeah, so that's it for old Roiland and his wacky, wacky characters. What are you going to do?

It's just insane at this point. It's starting to feel like everything is... I mean, is everybody a is... Is everybody a fucking... Is everybody a pedophile? It's starting to seem like in showbiz, if you're that successful, it's just like, what are you doing? I don't understand this thing. Like, just...

They have all the money in the world. There's websites where it's just... you can just do it. If you're that rich, you gotta- Wait, like fuck kids? What are you talking about? No, get a hooker. Yeah, get a hooker.

Why do these guys gotta keep going after regular- Get six hookers. Stop going after civilians. They can't be trusted, folks. Jesus Christ, why is anyone hitting on any regular person? Yeah, there needs to be a rule of engagement once you get past that. I think all sexual acts should be paid for in this country. It should be illegal to have consensual sex with a regular person.

Yeah. If I was president, I'd make it illegal to have sex without money involved. It's illegal to not be a prostitute. That's what I'm saying. We need to end this. There's too many good men. Jesus Christ. Enough.

They can't handle themselves. They're wild animals. We got to do the job for them. We have to put some, there's got to be some standards here. Well, with money, there's implied consent, right? So you're just eliminating all rape.

That's what I'm saying. It's helpful. It's like electric vehicles, like So you're just eliminating all rape. That's what I'm saying. It's helpful. It's like electric vehicles. Like 2035, no more gas vehicles. 2035, everyone pays for sex. I'm sick of creatives going down.

They can't handle it. Their brains are all wacky and they need to fuck kids and send weird DMs and chase drunk women through alleys and throw women in cars and open cupboards with a woman's head. We can't. There's no

who's good. The only good people I know are like Kyle Chandler and there's this guy Mav on YouTube who seems pretty sincere and like a good guy. Kyle Chandler. If I find out Kyle Chandler's a bad guy, I will blow my head off. I will kill myself. Why?

Because he's just such a pure man. I agree with you. He just plays Coach Taylor from Friday Night Lights. He's Kyle Chandler. He's in Wolf of Wall Street. He's the FBI agent. Show me a picture and I'll figure it out. He's the sweetest man on Earth. He is the sweetest man. He's America's dad. He's literally he took over for Cosby. He's

the ultimate American. Oh, that guy? Kyle Chandler, buddy. Yeah, he's always playing a World War II dude. This is all we have left. Chandler is all we have left. He just glows with kindness. Imagine him. He was the fucking dad in Manchester by the Sea. Yes.

Yeah, he rocks. He's the king of men. He is who you want. You want to look out on a Sunday and your family's barbecuing and Chandler's at the Traeger Grill. He's flipping patties. And he tells you, he goes, yo, we need some ice. ice you want to come with me you're getting his f-150 with him you guys drive to walmart he's teaching you you know how to fucking he's teaching you how to be a

gentleman he's got a palette of gatorade he's telling you about he's he's he's he's preparing you for prom yeah he's fucking he's he's you know clear eyes full hearts uh empty balls goes to church goes to church yeah but he kind of doesn't. It's kind of tongue-in-cheek. He doesn't really quite believe in religion. It's just like a routine for him. But he just gives, he's constantly giving incredible speeches. His eyes are so kind.

He's literally the only person I have hope for. Random celebrity. If I find out Kyle Chandler's a bad guy, I'm going to fucking kill myself. I'm not kidding. I can't take it anymore. No, I've looked it up.

He's good. So far, he's good. Nothing on his Wikipedia? He's fine. Kyle Chandler, like, got a charge. If there's a controversy with Kyle Chandler, I'm done.

Type it in. I'm done. Oh, no. Controversy. Nothing. It better be nothing. What do we have? Refuses to.

What does he refuse to do? Stop having sex with a woman. No. Here, here. He's such a good man. The only controversy is that him and Connie Britton in Friday Night Lights, they told the writers, we will refuse to. You don't write our characters having an affair because we are a wholesome family.

Oh, wow. That's how good they are. And they refuse to do the fucking show unless Connie Britton had a bigger role because he respects women and he wants women on TV to have bigger roles and she's not just supposed to be a cheerleader from the sidelines. And there's some incredible storylines in Friday Night Lights all because of Kyle Chandler. Who's a great man and if anything ever happens to him I will

kill myself. He's all I have. And this guy Mav on YouTube. He's very wholesome. I love Mav. He goes on little road trips by himself and shit. He's made money for himself. I like that guy. Just look up Mav. But, you know what I mean? We're down to like

seven people left. Chandler, Mav. Chandler, Mav. Fucking, I don't know. I don't trust anyone else. Who do you trust? The dude, the fucking the guy, the Star-Lord guy. What's his fucking face? Loves God.

Your friend from the elevator. Chris Pratt? Chris Pratt. Solid boy. Don't butt me. I don't know. He's hated. Yeah, because he's a God-loving real man. Yeah, but I bet he's done something weird.

Nah, that guy's great. That guy's America's sweetheart, dude. All right, Chris Pratt. I'll add him to the list. Who next? Charlie LaBeouf. No. I love Shia, but that's... No, Shia will be helped out tremendously

when I become president, and in 2035, I implement the only only having sex through with money. He's going to be thrilled about that. Yeah, he's going to. That's going to be like, oh, my God. Thank God. Yeah. I was so close to going to prison because I was about to beat the shit out of my girlfriend

named like fucking the mRNA vaccine. Who'd he beat up? Faka twigs. Yes. He's banging like a chemistry board. What? Was shooting dogs, too. He was shooting animals. He killed dogs. He's banging a chemistry board. What? He was shooting dogs, too.

He killed dogs. I used his name as a joke because he's clearly not one of our heroes. But Dustin Hoffman. Dustin Hoffman, good guy, but he got confronted by that weasel, John Oliver. What happened? John Oliver had a Q&A

and threw him completely under the bus on stage about something that happened 40 years ago on set where he made a woman uncomfortable by putting his hand on her shoulder. You know, whatever. Some shit like that. Yeah. Unbelievable.

We're out of names. I don't... When I did comedy, I didn't talk to women. Oh, Denzel Washington. I don't trust anything. Denzel Washington. That's a good one, actually.

Denzel Washington is pure. If Denzel, if I find out anything happens, if he did anything, too, that'd be really rough. That'd be hard. That's a really good pick. That's a good pick, John. Yeah, Denzel's solid soul. Who else seems like just the purest soul? That's a chaotic one is Will Smith. No, he already did it on live TV. Well, he slapped a guy, but you know what?

That's fine. You think that was okay? That was fine. That was crazy. That was fine. That DQs you from the list. Yeah, he's disqualified forever. He's disqualified forever. Because he's hysterical. He's hysterical. That's why I'm saying he's a chaotic person.

I don't care about the violence. That was just a womanly reaction. Yeah, it was unhinged. That was just an unhinged, hysterical reaction. Yeah. That was a man in a corner. That was the male equivalent of drowning your kids In the lake

In the lake out back You kill your children You leave them in the car Throw a toaster in the bathtub While they're playing with their rubber ducky Right? Yes The rubber ducky

What else happened? Jeremy Renner lost a fight to his driveway. Oh, yeah. Got in a big... Somebody was on their snowplow, and it was a little jammed, and they looked under it, and they... They saw his little face. They saw this face right here.

Hold on. I love... This is the funniest picture I've ever seen in my life. God damn. This is great news to see. Imagine your snow plows not working. What the hell is that? What's going on? You look under it and you see this guy.

He's like, help me. Help me, please. He looks like a muskrat. He does. Is that Jeremy Renner? That's like an ACA commercial. It's Jeremy Renner. He fucked himself up. Let's watch the story. Hopefully they took away his ability to was Jeremy Renner. He fucked himself up. Let's watch the story. Jeremy Renner is still recovering from two surgeries after his plow accident.

Hopefully they took away his ability to make music. Oh, dude. That shit's so fucking bad, bro. Anti-musical surgery. I like his music. Good. You a big Renner fan?

Yeah, I listened to it for a while. For a while? I had that album. I listened to that for like a week. What? Are you serious? Yeah, it's good. Does? Are you serious? Yeah. It's good.

Does he make good music? He makes really good music. No. You're the type of guy that would listen. South Dakota cocksucker. You fucking weirdo. God, hillbilly. It was good.

I think Ben Avery got me into it, actually. I got into his car one time, and he just had it on. I'm not kidding. He didn't even tell me what it was. It was just on. And I'm like, what is this? He's like, oh, this is the new Renner. This is the new Renner.

Are you serious? Are you serious? I swear to God. That's crazy. And you were into it. You liked it. It was really, I would take it to the gym. It was my gym.

It was my workout. What the fuck? Yeah. It was actually quite good. Give it another shot. I think maybe. I've never given it one shot. I got a start first. I knew you didn't. I knew you didn't give it another shot. I've never given it one shot. I got a start first.

I knew you didn't. I knew you didn't give it a shot. I'm just an asshole. Maybe he's a brilliantly talented man. I just don't. Of course he is. I don't like when actors have another skill. Like, shut the fuck.

Get enough. Like Seth Rogen, I don't give a... Fuck your vases, okay? Enough of the ashtrays. Make a fucking movie. He makes vases. All he does is make vases and ashtrays all day. It's like, all right, relax.

And they suck. They're not even good. Yeah, they're like... It's like fucking... It looks like some stoner in the Haight-Ashbury district could have made this. It looks like a sixth grade project in the arts room where you start figuring out how to mold the shit. You put it in the oven. Yeah. It's terrible.

Let's make another good comedy. Yeah, how about that? Is that too much? You stopped making like woke horse shit Santa shows. What was that awful Santa show they make? I don't know. Santa Inc. I didn't see it.

It was like all of the elves are trans. It was just a hunk of shit. There's that new Velma show. The Scooby-Doo Velma show. I don't know about any of these. That's on HBO Max right now. That's another steaming pile of shit. Another reason we should all just be fucking launched into the moon.

We should just be sent into space the moon. We should just be sent into space. The whole country should just be put in a rocket ship and sent into space. Let the animals come back. Give the animals their homes back. Coyotes could make better shit than us. I agree with you. Coyotes wouldn't make Velma that

bad. It would be interesting. It's Velma from Scooby-Doo. Can they stop? And she's like played by mindy kaling and like the whole show is like the whole show is so incredibly woke and bad that even woke people are like you're hurting our cause they're like like woke people are like upset by it can just let scooby-doo be scooby-doo who gives a fuck about scooby-doo i don't even know yeah i don't know what adults give a shit about scooby-doo retards like insane it's fucking wild.

I mean, it's like, what's next? Like, HBO Max is going to have like Go-Gurt the movie? Like, what is going on? I feel like they're really in a tailspin. There's nothing being made. They've forgotten how to make things. Like, I was reading that article where Brendan Fraser was thinking about reprising The Mummy. And he was like, the tone of The Mummy was so difficult to nail though and i'm like wait what the tone it's

an action adventure movie that's fun yeah what are you talking about brendan's a little up his ass no no but i feel like that's i feel like though no but i feel like that's indicative of everything that's happening they just forgot how to make good shit yeah you know what i mean well yeah if you watch the attempt to remake Mummy, it's like the biggest... It is a huge hunk of shit. It's terrible. It's like a nightmare. They completely forgot how to make it.

I refuse to watch it. Mummy's one of my favorite movies of all time. I hated the Mummy when those beetles go in him and eat his body. That creeped me the fuck out. I lost his eyes and his tongue. Yeah, it's Mummy. I don't know. Brandon Fraser that creeped me the fuck out. I lost his eyes and his tongue. That was scary. Yeah, it's the mummy.

I don't know. Brendan Fraser... You kicked ass in that movie. Yeah, but what are the... Did you see The Whale yet? Nah. All right. Yeah, why would you?

You love Brendan Fraser and he's in a great movie right now. Why would you go see that, John? I don't know. I've been a ton. Want to know why you won't see it? Why? Because you have the attention span of a squirrel.

Maybe I do. You do? Maybe it's what makes me good a squirrel. Maybe I do. You do. Maybe it's what makes me good. Really? I hop around. Hmm? All right. I'm like a time traveler.

Let's watch a little bit of what happened to Jeremy Renner. Because, you know, we all know that this is the biggest... Well, are we going to talk about his previous incident where he fucking did blow and almost blew his baby's head off? Yeah, where he shot a gun into the... He shot a gun in his house and it almost killed his kid. It's wild that nobody's bringing that up for this. Yeah.

It's insane. Yeah. Using your firstborn for target practice. But that's just as actors, man. That's Hollywood, baby. That's Hollywood, bub. Sometimes you don't have a dartboard around. You got to use your baby's head.

He was on set all day, man. Pull off a little steam. Talking like 18-hour days, bub. Sometimes you go home, you take a pot shot at the baby. It's like Daniel Day-Lewis at the end of fucking There Will Be Blood. You gotta blow some steam. 18-hour days. You come home.

You see that baby. It's the perfect size to kick. Looks just like a ball man my favorite part about that story though is that he had the gun in his mouth and he went ah and shot it in the air like some pussy actor he was like afraid of the gun yeah he had the no he had the gun in his mouth and he wanted to blow his brains out in front of his ex-wife or some shit and then he was like no i'm not gonna do it and he took it out but instead of just putting that's not dramatic enough he has to be an extra actor and shoot it out. But instead of just putting, that's not dramatic enough. He has to be an extra actor-y

and shoot it in the fucking air. Yeah, shoot it into the sky. I realize his daughter's sleeping upstairs. Yeah. No, it's a total actor move. That's insane. In his mind, you want to know why he's doing that

and how these people think? He's thinking like, I'll write something about this one day. Oh, yeah. People like that, these narcissists in Hollywood, they use their family and their friends and everyone in their lives.

They're all, you're, you're all, you're, they're all, uh, they're all movie characters to the person. They're guys such an art, like writers and shit out here. Yeah.

They use everything in their life. They all, they'll, they'll, they'll do horrible things. They'll, they'll commit adultery. They'll fuck with people all because they think they're like caught up in a movie and they'll write about it

one day yeah Renner just like blew his baby's hand off and he's like I made art here I just made art he's like one day like in 20 years

I'll have a novel about this it'll be a great chapter says he suffered blunt chest trauma and today there are new details about what happened we're learning more

about the horrific accident movie star Jeremy Renner suffered. Is that him in a snowplow? Yeah, he's like six. So he just like drives a snowplow around all the time? I don't know what the fuck

he's doing. What is he doing? Like enough of also these actors that like act like they're fucking Davy Crockett. Why do they all have to like pretend

to live in the wild? I feel like he probably has a bunch of property in Wyoming and he's like, I'm tired of paying for people. I'm just Jeremy Renner. I'm gonna buy the fucking plow. And then he just rides around.

And then he gets blunt chest trauma. Going snow. It really sucks that Indians aren't around anymore to just circle the home of Aaron Paul and his wife. They're in their quaint little home in Idaho. Just out of nowhere.

A torch flies through the windowaron paul looks out the window he's like ha comanches bitch and they're being circled just by maniac indians there's an arrow pierces yeah jeremy renner's being scalped yeah kanye's at his compound in wyoming he forgot totally forgot about the comanches. The Calvary has to come as Kanye's working on his newest fucking Jew-hating album. A bunch of guys in blue uniforms roll around. I always think about that

when these guys, whenever, because now the cool thing is to go move into, like the cool thing next, Joey, will be people moving to Rapid City. Celebrities will start buying property in Rapid City and in the middle, giant, giant resort-style home. Well, you guys had Cage. Well, Cage came there for National Treasure, too, and it was quite a big deal.

That's when he was spending all the money, and he went to Wind Cave, which is owned by my friend Cody Johnson, and he was considering buying Wind Cave. Wow. It's a big cave system that tourists go to. He wanted to buy it just to hang out in it for himself. He wasn't big cave system that tourists go to. He wanted to buy it just to hang out

in it for himself. He wasn't going to keep it open for business. He was like, he walked in and apparently he was saying, oh, this is going to be my bat cave.

So Nicholas Cage was just like, he's like Eric Cartman. He just wanted to buy the theme park to himself. He's like, hey, hey, finally no lines.

Exactly. Yeah. I was going to buy my bat cave. He bought a T-Rex bones. He bought T-Rex bones. I mean, that's sick. And then he bought a castle, like medieval castles. Yeah. I was going to move my back here. He bought a T-Rex bones. He bought T-Rex bones. I mean, that's sick. And then he bought a castle, like medieval castle.

Amazing. And then like shortly after it was announced that he spent all of his money on accident. Oops. And which was like tens of millions. How'd he spend it on accident? How does that happen? He's like a Venmo. He was like trying to pay his buddy for like IHOP.

And he's like, oh shit, it's like 12 million. I think. Can you send that back to me. He just wasn't doing the math. I think his account was probably like cage, cage, cage. You got to slow down here. That was the accountant talks to him. He goes, cage, cage, cage. Yeah.

Yeah. And I think he probably just told like fired his accountant was like, nope, buying castles. I got National Treasure 2 coming out. I'm going to keep doing huge blockbusters forever. Yeah. And then suddenly he's doing straight to VHS shit. Was National Treasure 2 as good as 1? It was really good.

The National Treasure movie is fucking slapped. Really? Even the second one was good? Yeah. It's really good. Yeah, they're really good. That's when he goes to England and he's insane. No, 2 is when he goes to Mount Rushmore.

I think 3 is when he goes to England and he has the most insane thing I've ever seen in my life. I can't remember three that long. Great films. All right. He was helping a woman stranded outside his home when he was hurt. First responders at first hear his home near Lake Tahoe might be unreachable. Just imagine some French fur trappers breaking in and just fucking wreaking havoc. They're fucking Jeremy Renner.

Fuck Jeremy Renner. They're chaining Jeremy Renner. They're chaining Jeremy Renner to a tree and fucking him and Leonardo DiCaprio. They're all wearing bear heads. You also have time to pay the fiddler, Renner. Because of the recent heavy snowfall. What's these photos of you? Look at this photo.

This is when he was a boxing coach in the 40s. What is this with his stupid paperboy hat? 51-year-old Renner is now in critical condition. Oh, shit. Blunt chest trauma and orthopedic injuries. The snowplow apparently accidentally rolled over his leg. Renner stars as Hawkeye in the Avengers movie franchise.

He was nominated for an Oscar for The Hurt Locker. Just last week, Renner posted videos of himself using a giant snowplow on his property. Early done with sledding for the kids. Jesus Christ. The thing rolled over his leg. What the hell is he doing? And Mother Nature. I expect to lose the fight, but I'll

always give it my best shot. So he's like his own garbage man? You're like a billionaire actor and you're like driving a garbage truck around? He's just bored, I think. He's just bored. He's just doing like civic duties. He's just like delivering the mail.

It's ran in the worst of potential environments and between all of those things together, it can add up to something bad really fast. John, how do you get caught under your own snowplow? Snowplow rolled over because he's retarded.

I assume he got very minimal training in how to use the snowplow. He was probably rolling around on big hills of snow and shit. He thought he was Jason Bourne for that one movie and he could do anything. Actually, I bet you're right. One of the big rules if something rolls,

if a big heavy machine rolls, rule number one is you stay in the machine. You let it roll, you stay inside, then you get out after it's done rolling. I bet you Renner tried to hop out mid-roll, and then he crushed his legs. Oh, God. Fuck.

He's going to get his leg caught in a corn combine. Poor Renner. This photo, though, he just looks... Doesn't it look like a raccoon in the trash? Look at this photo. Can you get over how funny it looks? It looks like an old dog. It's like, also, just stay in bed.

Sleep. You don't need to wake up and fucking go on Instagram. Speaking out after his snowplow accident, he shared this picture on Instagram, thanking fans for their kind words. Well, Renner suffered blunt chest trauma and orthopedic injuries and underwent two surgeries. The sheriff's office says that the actor

was helping a family member who was stuck in deep snow near his home in Reno, Nevada, when his own snowplow, which weighs more than 14,000 pounds, ran over him. Washoe County I'm picturing them putting him in the fucking section of the hospital of newborn babies

they have a gun next to him he's just sweating he got ran over by his own snow plow this is what happens when you call Renner for help it's like you call a big hollywood celebrity like hey uh my suburban stuck could you come help out yeah it's like okay yeah five minutes later if there's a chopper taking him to the hospital

i'm hawkeye i'll handle it yeah and we're so glad that he's here and he's glad that look at how happy the sheriff of Reno is He's like, boy, these Hollywood folks Sure are retarded When you and your team arrived What was happening? Well, Jeremy Renner was under his own snowplow When we arrived

We received a call at 911 Of a snowplow versus pedestrian And shots fired at an infant Snowplow? They call it snowplow Versus. And shots fired at an infant. They call it snowplow versus pedestrian? What is he, like, world star hip-hop? Like it's a movie on the sci-fi

channel? Jeremy Renner in snowplow versus pedestrian. That's the ebombsworld.com title. We got a call of a snowplow versus Renner. I'm on the West Coast, so there was about three feet of snow, and our highway going up was closed.

So when we got there, what we saw was Mr. Renner and his snowcat. He had been plowing the neighborhood. It's private roads where he lives. He had gotten out after he had unstuck one of his family members, and the truck was speaking to him. He noticed that the piston bully is what we call it as a snowplow started to move. He went to go back into the snowplow to stop it, at which point a family member and witnesses say they kind of saw him getting to the cat and then he disappears. And then later is found on the middle of the road as a snow-capped cat passed him

and it ran him over. The family member quickly ran to a neighbor's house. This guy's trying his hardest not to start laughing. Yeah, he literally is so close to laughing. The sheriff thinks this is the funniest thing that ever happened in his town. Him and all the boys, after they got him airlifted, they went

straight to a bar, and they had all laughed their ass off. He's like, sh shots on me, boys. He goes, that was the funniest fucking shit. They all go to the Alclad. They're like, this is crazier than the time Randy Quaid got caught in the tree. God, it must suck being like a small town

sheriff and all these Hollywood fucking celebs start moving there and you just have all these, you're like, he's getting these calls. You're like, what happened? It's like having a pest. It's like you've got an infestation. You're like, what? You're like, Sean Penn got stuck in the sewer.

What? 187, Tom Sizemore's in a shootout. This is at the local saloon. Yeah, Tom Sizemore walked in. He called himself Wyatt Earp and he started blasting. Those neighbors came out with some towels and then fire from Truckee Meadows Fire Protection District and North Lake Tahoe came down and then we care flighted him when we arrived he was

speaking when our deputies arrived on scene you know for what had just occurred he was in good spirits and then we rushed into one of our hospitals what Dan Aykroyd just made a killdozer. I was going to say killdozer. Oh, my God. Fuck. 10-4. Miles Teller got stuck in a school bus in northern Alaska. He ate some poisonous berries. We need to rescue him. Oh, man.

Johnny, have you... Yeah. You ever hit on a woman at the gym or in your jujitsu long before you were with somebody? No. You never hit on anybody in jits or workout stuff? That's not... Joey, you? No, no. I tried not to at the gym. Yeah, right. It's not a place to pick up shit. No, it's like a big no-no. I tried not to at the gym.

Yeah, right. It's not a place to just pick up shit. No, it's not a place. I sat, this video is pretty astonishing. This guy tries,

this guy is trying to hit on this woman at the gym, and he just openly tells her he has a wife. Jesus. You know, yeah. It's kind of funny. I want to see what this guy looks like. You don't see him,

but it's, I don't know, I still thought. So she's filming herself doing like a workout and this guy just comes in and has no clues being filmed and he's just like he looks so sad and dumb let's watch this Silly question, but I'm just curious. I know you don't like coffee.

And I know you don't. And I know you eat cereal. And I know you have a son. Right? Yeah. And I know you're a cop. Or a security. He goes, I'm the Night Stalker. He goes, I know your route to school.

I know your fears. He goes, real quick, I see you at all times. He walks up to this Random woman at the gym And goes Hey real quick Missy I just want you to know That I'm constantly watching

Everywhere you go I know your whole schedule Front to back I actually I've actually memorized The lines on your palms He goes I hate to be a bother

Just real quick I've mapped out Your entire routine I know the white of your eyes Is gonna make me hard as a. He goes, I hate to be a bother, just real quick, I've mapped out your entire routine. I know the white of your eyes is going to make me hard as a rock. He goes, I'm a little embarrassed,

but, he goes, I know your full family history. I've been watching you from afar. I've looked into you. I have your

social security number. He goes, I feel kind of silly right now saying this, but the smoke detector in your living room, you're going to want to change the battery on that. He goes, this is going to sound a little crazy. Don't get wild, please. But I changed your blinds last night.

Your blinds were getting a little, it was too easy for me to see through them from my van. And I just don't like that. I don't want you to be spied on that easily. So I changed your blinds in your home for you. You know how you said you didn't like that rug? I got you a new rug. And don't you worry about those transmission problems. Your car should be working just fine.

I took it into the shop. So creepy. It's so sad. Men's dicks just turned them into this absolute retards it is unbelievable what a man's cock will do to him otherwise self-respecting intelligent man on any given day his cock could just be like you know what we're gonna make you retarded my cock is has made me retarded oh i'm I'm around you constantly. Yeah, you're big fat retard. Who are you going to say like that?

You're a big idiot. Well, I mean... I don't even think your brain gets blood. I think your brain is just full of cum. All the blood goes to his cock. It's like one or the other. You got cum brain. I mean, okay, now you're going a bit far. Yeah, you know how spiders move? They like pump blood

into each leg. It's like Joey moves by pumping blood into his cock, and he just makes a step. It's like a hydraulic lift system, but it's powered by cum instead of air pressure. You have a lowrider cock. He's flipping switches, dude. I think you're really cool. I know you have a son.

I also love when men, when they're so nervous talking to women, they go, I think you're really cool. Why? All women should go, I think you're really cool. Why? All women should go, why? Why am I cool? What have I done that's cool?

You see me fucking talking shop out front, holding court. It's like, what did I ramp a motorcycle? What's cool about me? Would you see me like win a fight the other day?

Do I have like, am I slicking my hair back? Am I playing dice? You see a guitar solo or something? Yeah, did I do a guitar solo? What is cool about me? Women should go, I'm not, how do you know I'm cool? You play a guitar solo or something? Yeah, did I do a guitar solo? What is cool about me?

Women should go, I'm not, how do you know I'm cool? It's like, yeah. Flipping on them, ladies. Yeah, start making them say. Be like, what is cool about me? Right. What have you seen me do that's cool? He goes, I just think those tits on your ass are cool.

Your ass and tits are just so cool. God, you're so cool. Oh, women are cool. Your ass and tits are just so cool. God, you're so cool. Oh, women are cool and funny. Oh, you're so funny. She goes, I've never spoken to you. He goes, I know, but you're just so, I can just tell from afar your tits are funny. I'm kind of, sort of married.

Well, not kind of, sort of. Come on, this fucking guy. Well, not kind of sort of. I am. That's what he... Okay. Yeah. That's great. Yeah. Oh, she's so uncomfortable.

Yeah. I don't know. There's something about you that's really cool. It might be, like, your pussy, your tits, your ass. I don't really know what it is. Is it my ass and pussy showing through my yoga pants? Yeah, she should go, is it the fact that I have yoga pants so you can see my big

camel toe at the gym all the time? It's my pussy lips. My visible pussy lips. Is that what's cool? It's so cool. What is cool about me? My pussy lips? She goes, what's cool about me? The fantasy image you're conjuring up in your mind of your cock going between my lips?

Is that what's cool? Is that cool to you? Like, just casual, but I don't know if you have a pizza with you sometimes. Have a pizza? He's trying to be, like, a real low-down, grounded guy. Yeah. So. Not your friend, but, yeah. He's like, I just think you're cool you want to like maybe

possibly like watch like UFC like 247 with me like my like Makachev like Olivera you're so cool I guess tell like God no totally that's why I said I'm No, totally. That's why I said I'm married. No, I know, because it's crazy. I wouldn't. I'm married. Why would I be hitting on you? I'm the one who told you.

I told you I'm married, you fucking asshole bitch. You're trying to cheat on me. Fucking homewrecker bitch. Trying to homewrecker? You're a homewrecker? Are you a homewrecker? He flips the whole thing. He goes, no, right.

Of course. That's why I told you I'm married. No, asshole. He goes, no, right, of course. That's why I told you I'm married. No, asshole. He goes, hey, guys, homewrecker. He's an equinox. He starts throwing a fit. She's a homewrecker. Slut.

She turns into Karen from Goodfellas. She's like, I want everyone to know there is a whore at Equinox in Glendale. There is a whore at Equinox in Glendale. There is a whore on the leg press machine. Beat Mary's good, you know. Just leave, buddy. He might as well just come out and say, be like, listen, if you don't have sex with me, I'm going to kill my whole family.

He goes, surely you can tell something's not right. He goes, listen, I was pretty much assuming that you thought that my unsettling, shaky behavior would force you into having sex with me because you're afraid for other people's safety. I'm going to give my entire family date rape drugs and light the building on fire while they sleep. He goes, honestly, how could you not be mortified right now? If you're not scared of me right now, something's wrong with you. He goes, what are you fucking nuts?

You don't think I'm unstable? You better date me. You better get pizza with me and watch the, watch the game. Okay. Cause every night I make my, my, my wife and kids Spanish fly.

That's what I'm, that's for dinner every night. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. My connection would be your connection. What is this? I can't believe she's still talking to him, though. She's kind of maybe...

Well, because she knows she's getting this on video. Oh, right, right. I'm going to start unlocking the leg press. Let me spot you real quick. Yeah. He goes, oh, for sure, for sure. Men could be at the gym. They could be killing women.

Oh, no. Men are capable of anything. You know, for instance, like, I know my wife's going on a run tomorrow morning, and I might be in the bushes along her route. No, totally. Totally. No, I know you don't want to lose faith in men and humanity.

Either do I. That's because I plan on killing my whole family and killing myself tomorrow if you don't have pizza with me. We're going on a cruise next week and I know it takes like three hours for the ship to turn around if somebody goes overboard. So, you know.

She's saying he's literally a scumbag to his face. He's like not catching on. He's too stupid. Yeah. All right, buddy. You know, I really wouldn and that's it. All right, buddy. Yeah. And I was, you know, I was like thinking

I really wouldn't think about it. It's unfair even to like you also. It's unfair to you to, he goes, he goes,

listen, do you want me to catch that guy that was just hitting on you? He goes, dude, he goes, I know that, isn't this crazy?

I should fuck, I'm going to fuck that guy up that was hitting on you a minute earlier. Then he starts punching himself like it's liar, liar. Probably the best scenario is you, me, pizza. So now is he saying they're swingers? I think he's pretending about what happens. I'm like, seriously, if you knew my wife and you knew me and we were all friends, that's different. So now is he saying they're swingers? Yeah, now I think

he's pretending that his wife would be a friend. Yeah. Then he goes, you'll meet my wife. Watch this. You guys will probably go on vacation

and stuff like that. He goes, you and my wife are probably going to become best friends. After this, when I grab you and I tie you up, we're going to go home. You probably going to become best friends. After this, when I grab you and I tie you up,

we're going to go home. You're going to become best friends with my wife, right? And then later on that night, we're all going to be really good friends in bed. We're going to get quite close. We're going to be

very, very close. No, totally. I get it. I get it. You don't want to lose faith in men. That's why I'm going to show you how good

I am being a friend. Best case scenario, this ends without any bloodshed. Instead, it's you sitting on my face while my wife makes cookies. He goes, listen, best case scenario, my wife's in the

kitchen baking cookies. You're using me as a chair. That's what I see. When you're here and I see you, I go into the bathroom and I jack off. He goes, I've only jacked off to six women at this gym. And you are the number one most jacked off to. Oh, shit. Here's another thing of Roiland.

Listen to this real quick. He admitted to some weird... This is some weird audio clip of him on a podcast. As a race, are we that crazy? When we were fucking... 100 years ago,

it was little 13-year-old girls. If they were built like a woman, they were getting married and having kids. And now we're gonna be all precious about it? I keep using the word precious today. That's the word of the week.

Which is a movie about a child molester. Precious. Right? Downs and Jumps, baby. Yeah, exactly. So, anyways, I'm not a pedophile, though. I do follow the law. I'm a pedophile.

I wait until they're 18 if I'm ever so lucky as to have the opportunity. What? This man should be shot. I don't know. What a creep. Don't really get stuff like that. Don't really understand a saying anything like that out loud. Right.

There's no changing of the guard. There's no cancel culture with that. And I'm the biggest. I hate it all. A lot of people might call me a lack of a better term. A lot of people might say I'm a possible rape apologist. Child molester. A gay pedophile.

A lot of people may hear my thoughts on things and go, that guy is a rape apologist. But this I don't understand. No, this is odd. This is not. But it's weird with their little nerd veil. No, this is odd. This is not... But it's weird. With their little nerd veil, they get away with this. You know?

Yeah. You wear a fucking goofy shirt. You wear some weird nerd shirt, and you get away with it. Nerd glasses. Right, John? Yep. Got anything to add to this? He's a pedophile.

He should be burned alive. I don't know what to tell you about it. The guy's fucking like... How would you ever get away with... What does he think that's a good thing to say? I don't know what year this was. I don't know what he was thinking. It doesn't matter.

No, I know, but I'm trying to put it into context so that I can understand it, and I can't do it. It just makes no sense in any context. The guy's a pedophile. He's a vicious pedophile. Man, it just makes me think again if anything happens to Kyle Chandler. If Baby Boy Chand

says anything like that... Baby Boy Chand! Do you think Wilk is pure? T. Wilk? Yeah, of course he's pure. Who's T. Wilk? T. Wilk. Yeah, of course he's pure. Who's T. Wilk again? Tom Wilkinson. Tom Wilkinson.

T. Wilk. You know what? That's funny. We're actually, we're so unique. We are the only people probably in world history that have ever developed a joke where, like if somebody found out there is a group of friends in LA right now, they're all getting drunk at the house and they're watching a movie and they are referring to Tom Wilkinson as

T. Wilk. We almost started a company where it was like a picture of Tom Wilkinson and then it just says, got Wilk. Yeah. That should be one of our first merch jobs. Yeah, Charles.

Just the weirdest guy to become a huge fan of. Well, it's because of Michael Clayton. It's because of Michael Clayton. We were watching in the bedroom and stuff. Sean Wilkinson, great actor, but it's just hilarious that there's any group of young men that are like, T-Wilkinson. It's like we're big Wilkins. He's so good at Michael Clayton.

I know, but it's still hilarious. We're the only people on earth that have ever been big Tom Wilkinson fans like that. Like Tom Wilkinson has fans. People go, he's an amazing actor, and then they move on with their life. But we're chanting his name. For about a week, we were like chanting his name as a joke. We would be in places and we'd just start chanting T. Wilkinson. He's amazing.

Yeah. Well, you know what? We've been talking about that tow trucker. Remember the tow trucker guy we did on Patreon? Wasn't that fun?

Oh, I love that guy. Tow trucker? The guy, were you aware of that one? No, I'm not. If this dude that films himself is ruining people's day. Oh, that kicks ass.

Towing their car. Oh, is he like really moody about it? Yeah, he's just like a southern, he's like a true detective pedophile character that like just tows people's trucks and and he just like laughs about it and he ruins their whole day his whole job it's funny people tow truck drivers their whole thing is like like if you're a tow truck driver that picks up people that are stranded that's different but if you're a tow truck driver that's like the parking

enforcement calls you and you go tow their car, your whole job is just like, you just punish inanimate objects. You just pull up to a car with nobody in it. You go, you've been a bad boy. Yeah, this guy's sadistic. He gets pleasure from ruining people's lives. And then they run out and they go, I'm just, I was just inside. Let me get in. He just laughs at them.

He makes them describe. He's like, oh, really? He's like, what's going on with you? Why is this such a big problem? They're like, well, I got a newborn baby, and if I don't have my car, I can't work. And then he's like, well, the law's the law, baby. My favorite thing is that he's like a figure.

He's got a company based on ruining people's lives with his tow truck. Look at this. He's got a check mark on his YouTube channel. He's got like 170,000 subscribers. He's just killing it. He's just killing it. He's really cool.

Look at his logo up top. Look at that logo. It's like a really shitty skyline that looks like it might be like, what is that? What is that? It's got to be like St. Paul. Yeah, that's like Riverside, California,

or whatever the, I don't know what shitty town that is. But, okay, so here's his popular videos. Parking Revenge. That's always got to be good, right? Parking Revenge. Want to do that? Yeah, let's do it.

Let's do Parking Revenge. Hey, we're back. Hey, we're back. We're towing. Jesus Christ. That's what we do. It's about every day. Hell yeah.

He's a foghorn leghorn. Hell yeah. Towing trucks. They called in a car parked in the fire lines. We're going to have a lot of trouble. Oh, he's's a foghorn leghorn. Hell yeah. Toe on toes. They called in a car parked at the fire lines. We're going to have a lot of time. Oh, he's got a flatbed, dude. He means business.

He's fucking serious. Oh, fuck. I got to hook this car as quick as I can. Anyway, we'll see. We'll see how it goes. See, he's like worried. He's like, they might come out.

Yeah. Park anywhere you want He goes Oh yeah You looking all types of good To like a Kia Sentra He's like Oh

He's got his finger And his belly button He's like Oh yeah He's like You been needing a tow That's right You been

He goes You been needing a tow Haven't you Like someone's been Needing a ride Oh no tow, haven't you? Like someone's been needing a ride. Oh, no. Here we go. Here we are. They parked in a red.

Can't do that, folks. Can't park in red. Get them. Get them before they come out. Oh, it's an Altima? Oh, fuck. Oh, it's a Nissan Altima? Oh, yeah. So the car, like, came with warrants? Ha ha ha ha. Because I love the sound of chains. I got into tow trucking because it's the only place I can legally use chains. Love training these guys. Love chains. Love training in these stuff.

Love chains. I got a warehouse full of chains and people. He's just hitting on a girl at the gym after this. He's the same guy. He's like grunting. He's like, easy girl, easy. He goes, don't fight it, girl. He goes, these chains ain't gonna hurt you, girl.

He's giving the Ultimo a sugar cube. He plays trap music while he, like, tows the car. He's like... Look at him. He's all nervous. Yeah, he's looking around. He's like, motherfucker's burning. I'll come out here.

I hope I don't have a confrontation. I hope I don't have a confrontation. Is it Grand Theft Auto loading music? Hell yeah. Oh, dude. They got yanked. They got yanked. Yanked? Sorry.

You got yanked. Sorry. It's in the house for breakfast. Now I'm going to go get yanked. I didn't see anybody come out. Spend all day yanking cars makes me want to get yanked. He goes, the exhaust pipe on this Kia makes me want to get yanked. He goes, that exhaust pipe on that keel ultimate looks like it will fit my cock perfectly. Two of them parked there. They've been doing it repeatedly.

This isn't a one-time deal. I let these motherfuckers get away with it the first time. This Fire Lane guy. Fire Lane. Parker. Something I have found about doing these impounds. Somebody reports in a Fire Lane or a handicapped spot.

I really thought it would be the most entitled people. What if they're actually handicapped and they forgot to put up their placard? He goes, that entitled amputee piece of shit. He doesn't even hate illegal parking. He just hates handicapped people. He goes, I tow everybody in a handicapped spot. I don't care if you're in a wheelchair. I don't give a shit, brother.

You don't get to get anywhere quicker than i do because of your disability and uh most of the time when they come out it's gonna be it's gonna be some drama they usually come running and they'll run right up on you and uh you don't know if they're gonna uh they're gonna try to swing on them yeah these guys get like shot and you gotta't know if they're gonna try to swing on them. Yeah, these guys get shot and shit. You gotta be ready for them when they come, and more often than not, they don't realize

that tow guy, he's ready. That's what he's expecting to happen. His adrenaline's already up, and he's gonna be ready for them. He's gonna be ready for you when you come out. That's just how this business is. If you ain't ready, if you do this kind of towing and you're not ready for somebody to come out, man, you're going to get caught slipping.

Like how he's talking, is he describing desert storm? Yeah, I mean, it's like, what is going on? Is this Normandy? He's like, illusion 2004. Yeah, are you storming the beaches of Normandy or are you towing a car from a condominium? Head on to the yard. Get this thing dropped off.

We got a guy on the property. He's upset because he got towed. Hell yeah. Let's get to him. Oh, fuck. This guy. Oh, this dude's pissed off. He's going to be like, psh.

He called the police out here oh yeah like the police officer's gonna do anything about the man getting his car towed he got towed for a reason or it wouldn't have got towed anyway i'm gonna drop this one uh this fire lane car go ahead and drop it oh he's got an air pod I got one listening to hate watch security officer had it towed he's trying to keep teach this guy a lesson where the guy parks in a normal parking place like normal people yeah that's all the person is he's a normal person he don't get no special parking okay we got it got it, buddy. We'll roll to the next.

Go get in the competition. Damn. It's tow truck and we're back. It's auction day. It's auction day. I want to see him fight. Oh, he's got some motorcycles. He got a motorcycle.

It's parked in the road. He's like, yeah, we just towed Drift King. I'm going to go tow a dialysis center next. Oh, shit. How is this called parking revenge? No one's even fighting this guy. They fuck your car up sometimes when they tow your car. Yeah, that's why you always get a flat.

Dude, the ones that fuck you up are the non-flat beds. But we've, uh, the guy I work for, he's been, uh, he's been hauling Lamborghinis for many years. Long haul. He's not in a fight. On his profile

there's like a screen capture of a woman chasing Oh, here we go. Here we go. Uh-oh. Don't talk to me, bitch. He. Here we go. Uh-oh. Don't talk to me, bitch. He goes, one second. Yes, I have an S in my car. It's not a fire. It's just not a wish I could make to you.

Oh, is this him being a good person? So she didn't put her placard up in her car. She said she has it. But Tow Trucker's gonna quickly realize She's lying Liar He goes, you think you're gonna fool me, bitch Let me see these fucking things Let me see this

He goes, ma'am Don't try to use sexuality To to to Manipulate me I have sex with cars Ma'am, this is a Costco membership Manipulate me I have sex with cars You dumb bitch Ma'am this is a Costco membership

Oh he's like This is him being like I'm a person This is him being good He's like I'm a good guy He goes she's good She's good Look at me

Look at my authority She's good He gets in the car What is that? People are chasing after him What is this? Let's see what this is What the fuck happened here? What the hell just happened to the car. What is that? Yeah, what is this? People are chasing after him. What is this? Let's see what this is. What the fuck happened here?

What the hell just happened to the screen? What is this? The Fed's coming after you, man. Never seen this before. What the hell is going on with my computer? Shut it. What the hell? Who the hell?

All right. Handicap parking only? Do you think cripples come hopping out of their homes and chasing them? Or are they dragging themselves across the ground? Let's go to his popular videos. Parking revenge number six. This looks like a lady's pretty pissed. He's got some forearms, bro.

He's chaining up those chains. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Drop fees. What are drop fees, John? See, if you're getting towed, you can pay the guy right there like a hundred bucks or something. It'll drop it. So they'll just bribe you? Yeah, you can.

These people like legally steal your car. It's fucking crazy. Yeah, it's insane. It's insane. Get it? Say what? These guys should get shot more. How you doing, Carl? I think he gets shot a lot good

he right he speaks good English he's one of the normals okay I'll get your car back you ain't one of them bing bong boong people a lot of time I tow a car I don't even know how they drive the car with the language they be speaking it's got inspired inspired tag bucks to pay it and i'll see

i'll see that's completely right here she comes here she comes here she comes i told him explain to him it's saving money to pay it out here. If you don't want to do that, it's going to cost you more. Don't want to do that? You can drop that top and give daddy some milk. Daddy want milk. He goes, listen, I'll give you your car back if you give daddy some milk for his cereal. I'll drop the car. You give me a couple droplets of cream from them boys.

A baby's thirsty baby want mommy baby want mommy baby misses his mama you might think a baby can't drive a tote truck but they can

he's wearing big diapers he goes I know you can't see below the waist right now because I'm in my truck. Is that wearing a diaper? He says it all cool. He's really cool. He goes, because you might be wondering why my pants are kind of stuffed. Because I got a diaper underneath.

I got my diaper on. Yeah, you might be wondering. Yeah, it's a diaper under. I got my diaper on. Yeah, you might be wondering. Yeah, it's a diaper. He goes, yeah. Yeah, that's Pampers. He pulls out of his glove box a Rattler. He's like, I keep that thing on me. You know what I mean?

He's like, I keep that thing on me at all times. Baby needs his milk. Baby's got his diaper. Baby's got his Rattler. Baby needs a milk Baby's got his Baby's got his rattler Baby needs a little milk Oh god He's got the Like the toe baby

He's like you just got Yanked by the Toe Baby. I'm taking this Nissan Altima back to the crib. Sorry, y'all just been yanked by the Toe Baby. The Toe Baby. Oh, God. Toe Baby don't fuck around. Toe Baby needs some...

You all know the drop fee? It's a couple droplets of milk. Toe Baby don't fuck around. Toe Baby needs some... You all know the drop fee? It's a couple droplets of milk. Toe Baby needs his formula. Toe Baby thirsty. Toe Baby. Toe Baby. I stopped because I'm not liking the drop fee. I stopped because I saw those titties.

He goes, keep her away. Get her out of here. Get that ugly mommy away. Get that ugly bitch out of here. I ain't trying to hear Summer Over the Rainbow saying to me by that fat Samoan. I ain't trying to get into a fight with Mark Hunt over here. I'm the toe baby. She looks like she's supposed to be taking care of babies He's just chewing on a teething ring

They go, toe baby's gonna start crying Toe baby need to be burped Toe baby need to be burped. Toe baby. Look at that guy. He's like, shit, that's the toe baby. Get the fuck out of here. Toe baby reeks havoc. He's going to make you change his diaper Damn mama see them. How do you say toe baby in Mexican? Like, damn, mamacita.

How do you say toe baby in Mexican? He had to make her call on her phone because all he has is one of those baby monitors. He has a baby walkie-talkie. He's like on his break in the shade of a tree eating mashed carrots. What did you say, Gregor? The baby.

The baby is here. The baby is here. I come to this country to be safe and to be free of prosecution and I test the baby. The baby. The baby. The toe baby. The toe baby. The toe baby.

He terrifies me. Toe baby, he make my life hell. My country have a lot of problem but we don't have toe baby. I wake up one day

in El Salvador with my brother's head on my front lawn and then I come here for safety and I face the toe baby. Toe baby. You thought you were safe, bitch. You thought you were safe from the toe baby. Things are just a lot weirder here and scarier.

Toe baby shows no mercy. Toe baby show no mercy. We are retards. Huge, huge retards. We're retards. Do you have a key here? It's one of those big colored keys. He's driving a Fisher-Price car around.

He's shaking the big key ring. He goes, I'll tell you with my Fisher- with my fisher price he's like this thing got two foot power he gets out to like change somebody's side he's got those plastic baby tools we'll back up over there okay i may not be able to put in that same same spot, but I can put it over here. I can put it back down. We'll figure out where we put it. Okay. Okay. All right.

And then after this, you promise to watch the Wiggles with me, right? I love VeggieTales. If you want to tell her- We going home after this, we're watching Phineas and Ferb, right? Listen, let me say that back. He's telling her to go to the office. I'm not playing- I'm not doing that. We going home after this. We watching Phineas and Ferb, right? Let me say that back. He's telling her to go to the office. I'm not playing.

I'm not doing that. Toe Baby is going to watch Phineas and Ferb. That's the only reason to talk to the office. I ain't going to no goddamn office. She ain't getting the money in the office. Toe Baby's got colic. He's not getting the money. Hey, you told her to go to the office.

I explained to him. I told him. I told him I'm a fucking baby. Toe Baby's throwing a tantrum right now. Because Toad Baby needs a nap. Put Toad Baby down in his manger. Long story short, this gentleman wanted his girl to go talk to the office. So instead of paying me the $100 drop fee,

they're talking to the office about why I towed it. So now it's going to cost more money. Anyway, that's the way it goes. Anyway, off to Chuck E. Cheese we go. All right. Is there anything more? Should we watch more? There's a video I saw today of this 17-year-old

who basically went into a YMCA locker room, and there was a trans person that was just naked in there with her cock out. Really? And she's testifying in front of a city council because apparently she went to the YMCA, and they were like, yeah, that's allowed. At the YMCA?

Yeah. What happened to the type of number? The YMCA and they were like, yeah, that's allowed. At the YMCA? Yeah. What happened to the stipend? The YMCA trans. Okay. I don't know if this is going to be funny, but that's it. Teenage scolded by YMCA? Hell yeah. All right, guys.

So we got to talk about a story that you only hear. Is this it? Is this what you watch? That's what it is. But I don't have to listen to some fucking red-pilled guy. All right, guys. So we got to talk about his story. We all love a black conservative. I love a black conservative.

That you only hear in the Coco Puff world. Unfortunately, we are living in that world. Yeah, he's got like a 30-minute breakdown. Yeah, what the fuck? Get to the video. You know, heartbreaking. Take a look. Good evening, council members and residents of santee behind me my name is rebecca phillips and i'm 17 years old i am not a resident of santee but i am employed at a local restaurant the omelette factory and i work out regularly at the santee ymca

just two weeks ago after finishing my shift at my job hey we gotta make fun i went to the gym just watch john as i was showering after my, I saw a naked male in the women's locker room. I immediately went back into the shower, terrified, and hid behind their flimsy excuse for a curtain until he was gone. I ran into a bathroom stall to change as quickly as I could, organizing my thoughts to share with the people at the front desk. As I did so, I could only think of my five-year-old sister, who I bring to this gym during the summer to...

Sorry. And what did she think of me if she saw me squirting this much? Look at these two guys in the back. They're like, I can't believe Heisenberg killed us. I'm so mad at Heisenberg. I'm still pissed off how he got that goddamn machine gun in his trunk. Fucking Pantera back there. Fucking bullshit.

Enjoy their water slides. This is the YMCA, where hundreds of children spend their summer afternoons in child care camps. She has such a different idea of the YMCA than what I have. The YMCA in LA is a homeless shelter. This is what I expect to see at the YMCA. At the YMCA, I expect to see any and all types of people. I expect to see a guy who got shark surgery at the YMCA. He's got a big dorsal fin.

He's a human shark. He's a human shark. That's what I expect to see at the YMCA. What YMCAs are you going to? What is this town? The town of Santee? This is supposed to be a YMCA. It's a YMCA.

santee it's supposed to be a ymca it's a ymca okay we pay i pay every month i pay three dollars and 25 cents yeah it's it's a safe haven for uh anonymous gay sex and a shelter for homeless people yeah and human sharks it's a bath house for people with like tb that's what the ymca is okay it's so homeless people can wash off their rashes. It's for homeless people to go and die of an old timey disease. Remember when we worked out

the YMCA in Koreatown? That was fucking awesome, man. Just old Korean balls. That wasn't awesome. That was awesome. Old Korean balls everywhere. Sister took gymnastics lessons. The locker room was supposed to be her safe haven to gossip with her friends and shower and change. She's also fake crying.

When I asked the YMCA management what their policy was regarding transgenders, they confirmed that the man that I saw was indeed allowed to shower wherever he pleased. As long as you are not a red flag on Megan's law, the California Sex Offender Registry, a grown male can shower alongside a teenage girl at your YMCA location here in Santee. Yeah, it's pretty wild, bro. I was made to feel as though I had done something wrong when I talked to people at the YMCA. That's strange. Is that guy jacking off?

Somehow. Also, though, it's weird for... I think that guy's like, what is he rubbing? Naked men shouldn't be allowed with naked... He's carving a swastika into his thigh. But it's also just weird that adults are allowed to be naked around kids of the same gender at YMCA. Yeah, is that a thing? I didn't know about that.

They don't have a kid section? I always stay out of the locker room at YMCA for obvious reasons. I don't get naked in locker rooms. I would just go home and shower if I'm ever at a YMCA. But if that's true, I mean, that's still weird, like, same gender. I don't know. It's, um... I find people...

And why is she... She's 17. She looks like she's 35. Yeah, I don't get how she's 17. But I also... Yeah, people that shower publicly make me sick. Especially at a YMCA. Go home.

Go home. Or if there's not a private stall. If there's no private stall, people just shower. Yeah, that's the majority of them are private stalls. Oh, really? It's not like fucking... You're not in full metal jacket.

There's a bunch of people under hoses and shit. Yeah, well, people have their cocks out and shit. Yeah, I've been to a couple. My friend took me to a sauna one time, and it was disgusting, the amount of people just naked around each other. I know a friend that was. It's John.

Oh, yeah, you. I was getting Donald Duck in it. Yeah, the people on the Patreon saw that picture. Where is Santee? What a weird town. It's a fake Where is Santee? What a weird town. It's a fake town. Santee? What is this, like a Truman Show town?

Him that he should never allow me to shower there ever again. The YMCA wouldn't let my father speak to the manager of the Santee branch. After waiting several days, he finally received a call from Terry Moss, who is the director of membership for San Diego County. She informed my dad that I was not in any danger at the time of the incident, that I was safe. But I ask you this. I'm assuming all of you either have a wife, a sister, daughters, or granddaughters, or are a woman yourself. Could you knowingly send an underage girl into a room where there was a naked male

and say that she was not in danger, that she was safe, or more importantly, that this was right? Sounds like progress to me, bitch. The fact that there are privacy policies and bathroom laws around transgenders ignoring the blatant threat to safety that this poses is obscene. The safety of children, girls, is on the chopping block. And this issue is not unique to one political much like the same chopping block that these trans people she just gets she ruins her whole point she just starts looking really transphobic both democrats and republicans whom i have shared this story with have all been equally disgusted

so i implore you all to take action. With great privilege comes great responsibility. That is Spider-Man, ladies and gentlemen. Uncle Ben said that. I just quoted Uncle Ben from Spider-Man. I believe she is 17 now. She's doing Spider-Man references

in her trans speech. She does another quote. She goes, ladies and gentlemen, that is from the Netflix program Wednesday. Putting genders to use the single-cell family restrooms or making them use the bathroom which aligns with their biological trans... Thank you. Thank you. They cut her off.

Yeah. So, again, we've heard this story time and time and time and time again. I don't know if we need to hear this guy's comment. Give us five seconds. You have a woman, okay, that is in a locker room or a girl and you have a male that's shouting with them because in their imagination in their head they say that they're actually a female or they're a woman yep hell yeah brother i love that okay i love that guy it's funny that he's his whole life he's just like it's just in their imagination

this is all in their imagination he's like gay people have conjured up they imagine they like ass oh man by the way I want to make a public

apology to Yarmles because Devin still I know I've been busy this thing has a light inside of it and Devin just has to like. I've been busy. This thing has a light inside of it, and Devin just has to unscrew it,

and it will look way better. There's an outlet right here, too. It's pretty crazy. We can plug it in. I'm going to do it soon. Thank you, Yarmules, but I just have been busy. He's been busy plugging in his Sibian.

We're supposed to plug it in? It's usually where I plug my Sibian in. Most podcasts, I'm fucking myself throughout the whole thing. Yeah, we... Devin comes down here to get rid of his... John and I get office chairs, and Devin's been... You guys don't understand.

You guys sit next to me. That's why I need you guys to bring the heat more, because I'm just sitting here like... It's really disturbing. Kind of just jumped in on us. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Hate Watch. Just coming out of my ass. Yeah, well... disturbing, kind of just jumped it on us. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Hate Watch. Coming out of my ass. Yeah.

I think we've done some good work here today. I think that was a good redo. You know, we canceled out the federal crime. I still believe that the federal crime episode is much better. I'm okay with you releasing it. I want that to be on record. The only reason it's not coming out is because Devin lives in fear of

the FBI. I don't. I'm happy to talk to them. I'm happy to deal with them. If you want to release it, you have my permission, so don't yell at me, people. Yell at Devin. I'm literally looking out for Joey's safety and well being it's insane

it was your phone that made the call yeah I know so you should also feel really bad about that you could get me in trouble yeah I think you know I'm gonna

rat on you anything happens I go no I don't know my friend Joey was drunk and he took my phone from me I'm gonna tell them cause that's what you did Devin's gonna act like

he's facing a Rico charge yeah Devin's so scared I'm gonna act like when the mob got involved with drugs and they just started ratting everybody out it ruined the. I'm going to act like when the mob got involved with drugs and they just started ratting everybody out. It ruined the mafia. I'm going to just tell, if the FBI comes to my house

and they ask me questions, I'm going to lie to them and say that you tricked me into doing what I did. And that's just the way it's going to go. And you're going to have to deal with the consequences. Doesn't sound like a very good friend to me. I'm trying to protect you, my friend. I am doing extra work for my podcast because you, I'm worried about you. Well, I'm a menace, and I out-reciprocate that concern.

I'm going to. Yeah, but anyway, I think this was good. Some good stuff. How are you doing? Are you okay johnny i'm good i'm just reeling still reeling about this this this crime it is insane it's really it's fucking so casual we're gonna we're gonna put on patreon the fucking uh us describing there's an episode we did right after we go what the fuck joey then we like had to do another one we're like well this one has to be the public yeah and then that one's it's it's basically it's

just us chastising Joey. For like 40 minutes. Joey's just like calling like, Joey's calling like fake attorneys. He's like, no, it's not, it's no problem here, right? Yeah. And the attorneys, they weren't fake. They were real attorneys and they agreed with me. And I will just say, listen.

They're also your family members. Yeah. I was hammered. I was extremely hammered. And that's why I'm sober right now. You're going to get hammered and sell block D by some guy's big ass cock. You were in that trunk when you did it.

I was. I was pretty hammered. Oh, really? Yeah. It's crazy. You got really annoyed with that person on the phone and you just immediately went

haywall. Yeah. Let's not get too into it. Yeah, whatever. I want people to go to Patreon. Yeah, check out the Patreon for the episode where it'll be out tomorrow.

Five years. With this, too. Five years. That's what we looked up. Five years. I'm willing. I did the crime I'm willing to do that time. Well, the funny thing is.

No, John. No, no, no. I need you around, bud. Love you. I love you. And I'm not going to let that happen to you. I kind of want it to happen now. Yeah.

You might be the only thing that gets anything through your thick head. Big stubborn head. Well, I don't agree with you. I think that probably nothing would have come from this except for a really funny podcast. And now you're cheating the listeners who have been loyal to you. They've been sending you money.

Joey acts like we work for SiriusXM. We have a huge legal team. Well, the crazy thing is... That handles all that type of shit. I'll represent myself and I'll pod the whole thing. It's like... You'll pod the entire trial of you representing yourself.

I'll pod the trial and I'll pod myself owning the FBI on the stand. Yeah, that's... It's wild that he recorded himself doing a crime and then is just like, nah, nothing.

And then gaslit me the whole night to being like, Devin, you're a fucking pussy. Yeah, he's like, Devin, you cuck. You should fucking get me in a lot of trouble. Yeah. I'm willing to risk it. I'm willing to take the risk.

So I don't see. It's because you're suicidal or something. Yeah, it's crazy. No, I'm a risk taker. Joey, do you turn the shower like all the way hot before you get in? Yeah, I feel like you whip yourself in the shower. Joey like staples himself while he's fucking working. Yeah. I cut myself

Are you a cutter? I'm a cutter You seem like an emo person I'm an emo cutter kind of guy for sure And you guys live in fear and I don't So it's just What are you going to do? Patreon.com

Slash hate watch podcast This will be out tomorrow And podcast this will be out tomorrow and the Patreon will be out tomorrow too I think or at least the next day thanks for listening you guys any final words

Joey you're done with your pussy announcements right it's enough it's enough of that I don't even want you to keep bringing them up you're over it

I did that as a goof and it's done and I would always say Joey R. LaFleur on Instagram if you're a hot chick and you want to have sex that's what I would And it's done. And I would always say Joey R. LaFleur on Instagram. If you're a hot chick and you want to have sex, that's what I would say. That's what you used to say. That's what I used to say.

But you don't say that anymore. Say it again. Joey R. LaFleur. Yeah, but you don't do that anymore. I don't tell the hot chick. That's done. I don't do stuff like that. Why would you?

Because I did it as a joke, and then some people thought I was being serious about it. I know. It's unbelievable. And people thought I was being horny and creepy. And I was trying to do a funny joke for your podcast to make it funny. And now I'm being accused of being cum-brained and that my body works on a cum system

where... The cum gets pumped in. Your body is like a hybrid cum system. Well, that means it's cum transfusions. Remember that? You get cum changes. It helps with the cum transfusions help with yeah you actually you get cum changes like an oil change in the car it helps with the cum transfusions help with my knee pain yeah just devon goes to a valvoline

and then he a mexican guy unplugs his ass a bunch of cum flies out a mexican guy goes turn your car off and then devon's cum just spills out of his ass i go make it i go make it synthetic goodnight thank you