Have A Word with Adam Rowe & Dan Nightingale - #389 with Lily Phillips - Have A Word w/Adam, Dan & Carl

Episode Date: July 11, 2026

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Dan Nightingale.com for that. Adam is going on tour as well with fashionism, his new hour of stand-up. And that is at Adamrove.com. com.com. You can go and see the dates and get your tickets there. Yeah, an absolutely brilliant stand-up. And, you know, me and my mates are pretty good as well.

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It's going to be a belter. Wagwaglids, you're listening to the funniest podcast in the game from the heart of Liverpool with Adam, Dan, Sensei Carl and Finn. This is the one and only. Have a word. This episode is brought to you by NordVPN, the very best in protecting your online activity. Go, Ed, get on me.

Hello. Hello, everyone. Hi. Hi. It always feels like a less natural start to the pod when we've spent the best part of the last 16 hours together. Yeah. What a schedule we've got at the moment.

There's lots going on. Also, in between you and the guest, you've been away. I have done stuff between, in the five second gap, you've been on Aldi, which is a bit more for them, in it? What? In the other gap between this and the guest, you've done an holiday. No, to do the way around? Yeah.

He's not done all of the other. He's not been on holiday in the guest. I'm going back in time to perform me holiday by the time the guest comes in. Oh, shit. Oh, no, she'd be been an holiday. Oh, yeah, wow. Buddy, sorry about that.

That might be the stupidest thing you've ever said. It's like, tenet. I'll take it. Not bad. Yeah, we've already recorded with our guest, Lily Phillips. She is going to be joining us in the second half the show.

It was a really good guest episode, I thought. It was great. Really enjoyed it. I think you're going to enjoy that. Yeah. But since then, I've been to Paris. I've done a lot of pooing. didn't have a good time in Paris

I've got a really bad stomach problem gone for tests had a poo and a pat a proctologist a bum doctor or just a doctor who also you know dabbles in I just went to a GP

and I was like here's what's going on and she was like right lad listen if I give you the wrong antibiotics it's going to make this worse and you're going to have shit coming out your nostrils and everything and I was like let's avoid that

she went so what we need to do is we need to get a bit of your poo and we send it off to some fella in Stoke-on-Srent and he grows your poo. He grows the bacteria in your poo and then he'll grow like a mushroom and he'll be like, I know what that is. We need to give them these antibiotics.

She doesn't want to give me tablets before she sees what mushrooms are growing in my belly. Did you black out when she was explaining what was happening to your poo sample? No, they grow on the bacteria, aren't they? They grow a mushroom out of Adam's shit. Yeah, they're going to grow what it is so they can look at it.

What? No. Yes. Surely they just look under like a microscope or something. No, they have to grow it. It's full of poo down here. Microscopes are expensive in Stoke. They just grow the sample.

That's what she said. They're just not making shit big. No. What we've always done. Did you, because obviously I missed the Patreon episode, I assume you have fun with Brennan. Yeah, Brennan was great. Did you mention the country day

that we all went to on Saturday at all? Not at all. No. Okay, cool. So we had our final whore ye of the summer on Saturday just before I went to Paris. Yeah. And it was really good fun.

I've never done one completely sober before. It's completely sober because my stomach was bad before Paris. So I was like, I'm just not going to, I'm just not going to booze. I'm going to try and look after myself so Paris goes well. It turns out I should have got fucking blathered

because it made no difference whatsoever. Okay. It was a cool. This event got added quite late. So there was a couple of things that happened Probably worth talking to you about Because you're the only one of us that went there Yeah, apologies, I was in Saddle with

with, happened a wonderful time, did not shit once The event was really good When I got there, there was a couple of reserved signs on tables So I spoke to the management and I was like, what's this? And they went, well, because you only booked this event in really last minute, we already had two bookings. Now, the way the bookings work at that venue is people don't pay to go onto the roof.

they pay like a minimum like let's say there's 10 of them they'll go right give us 250 quid and you'll have 250 quid on the bar when you get here it's a minimum spend but you definitely turn up yeah totally

so I was like yeah but like this event is 25 quid a ticket and they haven't paid to get and he was like well you wouldn't have been able to put the event on because we already have bookings in so we spoke to our team and they were like

look you've already got bookings in and I I was a bit, like, it's not ideal, that. And I was like, look, this can't happen again. But we'll just swallow it for this time. He was like, look, they've got the table for an hour and a half. It's from half three till five o'clock. They're not going to be here for the full event.

They're not going to get the full thing at the end. They're just going to listen to a bit of music at the start, and then they'll go. And I was like, yeah, I just feel a bit annoyed that, you know, there's people who've paid to get in, and they're not going to get seats because these people are getting seats. But I suppose after an hour, they can have their seats. And he went, look, they're not even here for your event.

They're here for a couple of little birthdays. and they're just there to just, you know, have a few drinks and then they'll go to whatever else. They've got planning for the rest of their days. I was like, that's absolutely fun. So sit down, waiting for the event to kick off. People are starting filing in. And then there was, I'm going to shoot at Malaysia.

Okay, I don't think you're far wide there. Yeah? There was a Malaysian woman with a Malaysian baby just walking around the event. So I went over to her and I was like, hello. you're all right? And she was like, yeah, I'm looking for Lulu. Singha.

Sounds like she wants drugs, don't it? Have you got any Lulu, lad? So one of those tables was for Lulu. And they're over there. And the other people at the table at the time were, they were all quiet. So I was like, yeah, go over there. And then within five minutes,

there was, if I'm right with Malaysia, I'm going to assume all of the people in that party were not white, were Malaysian. Yep. There was at that table 20 Malaysian people and eight of them

were Malaysian children. Yeah. Toddlers. So I said to the manager, I was like, do you know, like there's Malaysian children on the roof?

Children being the important part of it. Yeah. Just the Malaysian bit incidental. Yeah, yeah. But if they were Singaporeans, fine. But even anyone's ever said to another person. Did you know there's Malaysian? children on the roof. Do you reckon that's the first time I've ever been said? Possibly.

And the manager was like, yeah, see, they'll definitely have to go at five o'clock because our licence for kids is only till five o'clock or six o'clock or whatever it was. And I was like, yeah, cool. Just letting you know, you know, because I'm not like peasing this event up just because there's Malaysian children on the roof. And he was like, yeah, just keep doing what you're doing. You know, if anything, they might get offended and just leave earlier. We're really sorry. There's just, you know, it's one of those things. It's a diary clash. And then I'm on my phone for a sec and then I look over to the party of predominantly Malaysians and a couple of whites and every single one of them including all the children had cowboy hats on

and bea cheeps like they look better than us but no one had made more effort than the Malaysian children they'd fully cowboyed up so I was like right I'm now struggling to believe that they didn't know that this was a cowboy country music event and it feels like they've booked direct with the venue to get around paying a ticket price which I'm, you know, not happy about.

So they got to the bottom of it and it turns out what happened apparently the venue had called them and gone, hey, we're going to have to cancel your book and we've had a private event booking for the whole roof and they've got to cancel it and they went, no. We don't want to go back. We're not giving you our bank

details. We're coming. We're coming. and we'll just come to that event. And they were like, you can't really do that to ticket price. And they went, we've paid our minimum thing. We've made plans around our full birthday for this thing.

We're coming. And they were like, look, you might not even like this thing. It's a country and Western events. And they've gone, got, yeah. Then they've gone out and bought.

Yeah, they liked her. Yeah. They liked her. Cowboy hats for the Malaysian children. Yeah. Nah, and then I think the other, like, group was just a load of,

yeah, they kept to themselves. They kept themselves. They had a good time. Yeah. It was... But the Malaysians got involved. It was a young homosexual man's 21st birthday, I think. We love a label, don't we?

He was a young homosexual man. And there was a man, it looked like a bit like a Viking there as well. See him. Yeah. The beard. Viking gays and Malaysian children is a... I've missed the wrong country now.

But it's been looking like angled beads. Oh, one of those. Did it mean? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't use them like that. I was at this event.

I didn't see any of these people. You were black at the fin. Steve was convinced, by the way, that the Malaysian group were, it could have just been a coincidence because it was Fourth of July. Oh, yeah. That was, that was Steve's thing. He was like, they could have just,

like, accidentally ended up at the only country music party while they're all dressed as cowboys. It was a shot at that. I've heard some of Stee's not country-related. Fourth of July is America. It's like beach parties and shit. It's spring break. Woo!

It's adjacent, and it's fireworks and flags and full-on. Flag non-servoirs. Anyway, the event was great. How long did the Malaysian children stay for? The Malaysian children did get thrown off the roof, not literally. Whoa! We have buried the lead at 6 o'clock, but some of the other Malaysians stayed. I got there at 6, that's why.

There you go. And you didn't notice all the Malaysian children on the floor who'd been thrown off the roof? Okay. There's a lot of police. Yeah. I just told them they could stay. I didn't want to be like you've got to go because you're Malaysian

Yeah No but even like the gay gypsy guys as well I didn't want to kick them off You didn't mention in Malaysian Just don't need to Like stay or go Malaysian doesn't need to be mentioned You know what I mean?

Yeah I say all of half to them Yeah don't go like stay because you're Malaysian I don't leave because you're Malaysian Listen I know you're Malaysian And that's not important But you need to fuck off Not because you're Malaysian But you're not staying because you're Malaysian

If anything just fuck off, but you are Malaysian. And if you were looking for 27 uses of the word Malaysian today, you got it. To get to the most, my favourite bit of the whole story. Are you going to go there?

Which mean? I don't think where you're going with this. Yeah, but Carl, we've just been there, so we might as well go there as well. The lady. Yeah, we're going there, yeah. Oh, we've absolutely got to go to the lady. The lady. Yeah. Oh, okay. Unnamed. What? Unnamed. Let's go one. We'll give her a fake name. Yeah. Donna. Right.

So there was a woman called Donna who, she's very friendly. I think she fancied me and Carl and my missus. She's just a flirty kind of. Yeah, I reckon she was early 50s. She told me she was about to become a grandmother, so I'm going to go. Early to late 50s? 50s. She wanted them.

Early to late 50s? She was very interested in. She was lovely. She was... She was lovely. She was keen. She had a strong grip strength. On your dick.

At one point she tried to like grab me to pull over to her and she grabbed me by me watch and nearly ripped it off me. You love that, don't you? She was also four-fourthold. Adam loves that, by the way, if you want a selfie on the street. Grab him, grab his watches. She was four-foot-11, then.

She was a very small, early to late 50s, keen woman. Yes. Pissed? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Possibly. Right, right. Yeah.

She came over to tell us how much she loves us all. She was asking where my missus was because she fancied her. I told her if she wanted to have a little, you know, kiss of the pussy time with Alex. She can give it a go. I think Alex said no, though. Yeah. I don't think you're allowed to speak on your partner's behalf on that one.

No, but what I mean is, like, I wasn't going to get pissed off with Donner trying it. I gave her permission to ask. Yeah, you did. You know what I mean? I go and ask, you know, see what she says. Alex, I'm sending someone over. Well, just be careful of your watch. So, um, yeah, very grabby and lovely and just a bit, you know, hey, you come here and

and kept shouting at me and Carl, but like, like, hey, being fucking rude, not bad. I love you, though. I love you. Oh, that is a great impression. She sounds like an interesting middle-aged bisexual woman. Me and Carl had the, uh, the pleasure. of her company for about 15, 20 minutes. I managed to get away, actually, after about five,

but the full 20, Carl had all of it. And then we thought, you know, we can't keep this to ourselves. She wanted to be Harry and Finn. Yeah. Basically. So I told Harry that there was a woman there from... Panorama.

Panorama and dispatchers who wanted to speak to him about getting better guests for the next series of Madda. And Harry's little face lit up like a fucking Christmas tree and he was like oh my God, where is she? He left the conversation he was in.

Which Ellie wasn't unhappy about by the way because we were at the front of the queue for drinks. Yeah. And I left her. So he went, yeah, take me to her right now. So I walk vaguely towards her and went, it's that lady in the purple top. Harry went and introduced himself

and sat down right next to her. And very quickly caught on to the fact that this was not... No, this was a sting. This was clearly a ban to stink. Yeah. And then, and it was one of them ones where

when you were sat next to her it was difficult to be no longer sat next to her and she wouldn't really allow it she used pressure points as well when she came and like hugged me and she grabbed me by the head and then got her finger and shoved it like in the little you know soft bit behind your ear that was her loud

pretty violent so Ellie come up to us someone's like oh my god is that the woman like he's talking to is she the the telly lady who's going to get the best a guest. So at that point where you went, Ellie,

just so you know, that's not what's going on. Told her what was going on. And she was like, right, I'm going to go and save him. She threw a drink over, Ellie.

She knocked a drink all over Ellie. And look at Harry's face. He's like, that's my job. And then we got, so Finn came off stage after, you know, doing his great stuff on stage.

And I was like, Finn, this lady wants to meet you. And then Finn, with all, like, so much respect, gave her five minutes and then just walked away.

Five minutes. It was, He just went, I'm finished with you. I was like, wow, respect. Good, on you? There was a minute. I'm a pro at that. Harry is the, Harry's stuck there.

Harry loves chatting to everyone. Yeah. You got away though by proxy. She threw a drink over you. Well, yeah, but then she tried, then she found us afterwards because she bought us drink. She was very apologetic, but she, like, hunts us out like a shark.

Then I was in the toilet trying to dry Ellie, but because I've got like a fucking street reputation of spilling drinks. Everyone just assumed I'd swilled Ellie. So I had to go. around the old... It's fair, though, isn't it? Rightfully so. Yeah, but it was... I've been framed for a crime I hadn't committed? Do you know I mean? Like, I know I've got a record, but I'm doing better.

Yeah, but you've been exonerated now on the podcast. Yeah. Yeah. So this lady was... She was great, pissed anti at a Kristen vibes. Yeah, but like... With lots of aggressive touching. Yeah. She sounds like a fucking... Pist anti, but she's filed a big old bag of lemon.

Maybe pissed uncle... At Kristen vibes. Touchy? Yeah. Oh. Bit grabby. But yeah, but 4'11 uncle. Is she connected to anyone? Because we're dancing around this really carefully. No.

Like someone's sort of related to her. She was there with her husband. He was a good guy. Scott Chegg. Scott Chegg. His name was Scotcheg. Oh, his name was Scott.

And I went, oh, Scott Chegg. And she laughed like I'd just recited Raw by Eddie Murphy. I'd be fucking impressive. Do you know a single word of that special? I know that bit. Even the Mr. T bit. Only age, only lips. Like any Murphy's in the room.

What? We have that one more time. I don't have any up. Quite a deadly Murphy, if you ask me. Can you, um, cut that out? I'd like that on the soundbook. Yeah, it was, she was interesting. Listen, I didn't meet her.

Can I say she sounds like a fucking nightmare? She wasn't a nightmare. She does sound like a... No. She was just a little bit like sexual assaulty and a non-threatening female-to-male way. But over-zealous. Dreadful.

Sounds dreadful. Yeah, it sounds dreadful. No, I can say it because I wasn't... It was harmless. It was harmless. You can say it, we can disagree. Yeah, it wasn't dreadful. It was funny.

It was funny. It was funny. It's funny to watch. Yeah, it was funny. Oh, the grabbers, though. Not a fan of the grabbers. And I'm quite a tactile person. But when it's all like,

alright, mate. He was like, fuck off. And she have the hands of a 4-foot 11 woman, do you know what I mean? Small? Yeah. Oh, right. She's like big fucking shorples.

Didn't. She left early anyway, because Jack Finnegan told her fellow to take her home. Oh, wow. I wondered where that was going. Put your little tiny hands on Jack Finning and find out. She was hanging off.

on the dance floor like that and Jack and Jack to her husband not to have to Scott Jack I was fine though she's just hanging

I mean yeah and I'm rigid aren't I tell you what they're doing one of those days sober good fun

I actually didn't know how those events ended I do now oh yeah they always outlet that in a 20 minute rendition of revival yeah

yeah yeah I mean that's how every rendition and revival goes I'd have left after about eight minutes but

Oh, I won the best. I'm here on the whole. Oh, yeah. Harry fucking ruined me down soft competition as well. I won the best dressed. I started doing a best dress competition, which is probably the highlight of the fucking last couple of days of these that we've done.

You're not allowed in that competition. He wasn't me. I was adopted into a family. So he wore his shirt that looks like an American flag. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there was a family who turned up all in American flag stuff. So I nominated them. Malaysia, no.

The Andersons. I nominated them as one person. Like, they're best dressed as a family. Oh, like on Britain's Got Talent when there's like a group of fucking singers from the school. Yeah. Yeah. They won direction. And Harry tried to nominate himself for best dress.

And I said no, because it'll ruin it and he'll win because everyone will just be like, Harry, hurry, hurry, hurry. So Harry then just went and joined the Andersons. And was like, I'm an Anderson. And then the Andersons won. So we had to do second prize. I had to give two bottles of fucking tequila away. I think they would have won anyway.

The dad was sick. He was, like, taking his shirt off and he was, like, dancing on the table and that. Well, what happened was, there was a girl in the final who tried to use, uh, sexual proclivities.

I totally missed her. I was looking elsewhere. She did, like, a strip dance down the, the beam that was holding the whole roof up. Right. And she probably went in the lead with that until Mr. Anderson,

the 75-year-old man, who, you know, he got a big lad. He got a bit, he just copied her. Yeah, he matched the energy He matched the energy

Done a strip thing Took his top off I saw him Yeah So they won I kept on calling him dad It was making him a bit uncomfortable He really got into the bit

Well I was We were stood there in a line It was like You know at the end of X Factor When they'd vote someone off And like the bands are all there With Louis It was like that

And I kept to go I love you dad Oh you said I love you dad I don't know if anyone else Notice this bit Do you know They were doing like docy dough, like, round each other.

They might have choreographed that beforehand. Harry didn't know that was happening. So Harry just kind of, like, danced around them while they were doing that. No, because we would... You're not a real, Anderson. Me and Mrs. Anderson were, like, slow dance at one point, and she said, like, she went, like, 2-1-2,

like American football codes, but I was like, I wasn't there for the team talk before. So she's doing that, I'm just going, like, and she was, like, dancing. Maybe we won, you know. You know, they would... No, we. It was a week.

It was a joint effort. Have you had the security one? Yeah. Me and Mr. Anderson drank some. I genuinely. He came over and he was like, Honorary Anderson. Mr. Anderson.

Yeah. How was Saddlewiff? Really good. It's a great gig up in Greenfield. Not as fucking mental as this. And a lot less Malaysian children. Is that the Moors? I'll say, yeah, it's just before the Moors.

Yeah. Not tons of Malaysian children in the comedy audiences at Rob Riley. gigs. I think that I don't think. I'm going to offend anyone by saying that. They were fucking great. Did to be on the Sunday. All right. Pretty good. Pretty good.

Not enjoy that one now. No, I did. I did. But several people found it, I think, quite tiring. So. What's mean? Well, I did. I've done an hour, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. And it's on purpose, getting ready for the Don Nighting Girl and Friends tour.

And, right, stand-up that I like with have a word fans and my followers in mind and 62 year old women that live in Didsbury and go to a comedy in a church hall. That's not the same demographic. You know what I had a great weekend. So you're switching up for them no man.

Yeah, just change the references. Do your Didsbury stuff, man. Change the references. You used to live around here. You could do some Didsbury local. Didsper there. Hey? Hey, no.

What about the deli around here? Expensive. Is that green gross is still there? It's good, that of it. Oh. A bit of local. Yeah. I saw Pitbull and Liljohn in Litham.

Oh, you went to the Lhythm Festival? So Pippall and Liljohn. Oh, they weren't just about. No. I was like, what a fucking hell! I saw Lil John sing Sweet Caroline in Lytton. I don't know, Lil John. You do.

The song, The song, yeah, by Oshah, it's Lil John. But I'm off to the window, to the wall. No, no, but, like, Lil John could be in here right now, and I wouldn't know he was here. Yeah, we don't have many Liljohns in the studio, do we? There'd be a 55-year-old black rapper in the corner. I think you'd have your suspicions. That's Josh.

Look at Josh I think of the exact opposite I mean Lil John I think Lil John is the opposite of Josh No offence Is Lil John on Lizard woman No he's a small black man with dreads Is he small?

He's not big Oh I thought he's an ironic I thought yeah But there's a NFL player called Lil Jordan Humphre And he's 6 foot 5 Yeah it's not little John Maybe he's not small

But in my 5 6 Yeah he's small Oh he's small Yeah Yeah you're from at Lantown He told you loads But he can punish fucking party on and then Pipple came out

with just unbelievable energy and we were all dressed as Pipple. Like we all had bald wigs, shirt, ties and about, there's 25,000 people there I'd say... How'd you feel about that then? Your equivalent to black face? Yeah, it's cultural appropriation. Balled face. Marlain. I saw

someone say once Pipbold probably imagined all as follows is these gorgeous fucking Latin girls where he's from and it's not, it's just loads of English people wear a ball caps in a field. He must be gutted. It was sick. He was so fucking good, his energies and so.

They're bookings. They got a lot of money. I know, but they, did they do, like, one sort of... It's a full festival, full week. Yeah. It would do the headlines this year. It's the contrast in nights, because it's not like three random noughties. Yeah, no, it's always like...

I've seen Stings, Night's Wayne, Strokes. Oh, so they do a sort of indie rock night. They do a bit of a... Alanis Modisette this year, um, Pitbull, Michael Bublai was there I mean that is so living festival Teddy swims Pet Shop boys

So there's a bit for everyone You can go to them all Or you can pick you all night That's for you Yeah Like Stevie Wonder was there last year Which is mental He didn't know

Last year was better I'm fucking jar of glass It's all them They get names They get names But they're all over the hill Yeah Justin Blit was there

Maybe is he over there Yeah Kingsley on Oh mate over the hill Strokes Strokes is still great but they are now

almost like a nostalgia band of themselves Olivia Dean No, okay, I'm just saying These are good names But they're all nostalgia slightly over the hill picks Yeah I'd be happy to watch

Should I and Twain? Oh yeah, sorry She's in her peak Isn't she? What is she now? 64. I think she was at my Didsbury gig Anybody who's played there at the peak?

Hoseya Hoseya, yeah saw Hoseya there is fucking great There you got And he's in his pop Things on have been the support Like for Zach Brian

on like a third of his tour that must be a bit of a stinger because they were fucking massive well I think at those shows like there's

you know almost as many Kings of Leon fans there as well it's just seen as like a super show it's not like when we went

and that Dejohn mustard fella opened and I don't think he was right for the crowd he's class I love Deijon what the fuck's Dejohn mustard

Dejon was the opener for Zach Brian and not a lot of people enjoyed it. It's a weird. Experimental folk. Yeah, it's a weird... Steve loved him. Yeah, he's class.

Got in there early, watched the whole thing. Back into Dijon mustard, yeah? Wow, Steve said yes. Yeah, it was an odd booking for... It's because Zach Bryan doesn't want to be seen as a country artist. That wants to be cool. He wants, oh, I like you, you can open.

But in reality, like a lot of his fans just want an open-coming country artist on. But support acts usually are... in the past historically have been that, haven't they? Someone not as well known. It's not necessarily a great booking. Like in comedy now, the last five, ten years, you've been a part of this.

Comics are going, oh, I'll have my mate. He might also be doing a tour like in eight months or something, but he's my mate and he's dead good. There's been a cultural shift. Because when I was coming up in stand-up, you were like a new comic, purposely booking support acts that weren't very good. Yeah.

Like, it was seen as like that was part of it. You don't want someone doing dead well in the, opening section. And now there's a, there's been a shift where it's like, that doesn't matter. Everyone's going to have a great night and they're still here to see Adam or me or Mike Rice or whatever. Maybe that's happening in music as well. Because the Kings of Leon, I've seen them at the O2. They're still doing an arena tour on their own. Yeah. They're doing it. They're on that now. But that's cool that they've gone. Yeah. Yeah. Good bookings. Tell you on that, Paramo, who were great from when we were kids. And then she had to be in the

carpenter before that, but she blew up during the tour. Like she got that big. She had to just go and be she being a carpenter. I feel like Paramarmo. was a great booking for Taylor Swift. They were fucking boss. Like I loved Panama when I was younger and I was like, oh, I'd never see these. I'd never buy Panama tickets. Maybe at a festival, but I was like, oh, this is great.

Yeah, but hard times is an absolutely fucking bang. There's any business, mate. Shania Twain was good at Harry Stiles. Yeah, Shana. And that was like, everyone fills in. I mean, I went to go and see her, but you'd never go and see her, but you get stuff to see her. I think Shania Twain's a great bucket.

Haven't they, like, change the market and of that? And it's like, Harry and Shania. Well, the tour is the together tour. so every, because he's got different, based on what countries and he's got different support acts. So, Shanaithuan was only at Wembley. So it's Harry And then someone.

But it's just because the Tours like, get with someone and fucking neck them. Yeah, they're not. Is he fucking Shunai Tewan? No, he's. No, he's with Zoe Kravitz, oh, of course, he's with Zoe Kravitz. She's looking good still, Shia.

I forgot to tell you, by the way, when I was at Wembley, I was in me Flares and I went in and I was, I'd just been drinking Red Bull all day. I had the worst poo. I've never had in me, like, at Wembley, came out and I was, the fellow who was in the cubel next to me, was washing minds next to me, and he kept on looking me up and down, and I was really conscious about the fact I was wearing, like, a bit of a crop top and flares.

And he left the toilet, and then he came back in and looked me up and down, and then was like, are you hardy? I thought he was just judging me for having the worst shit of my life and then having shit kecks. You might have been doing both. Yeah, as you know, this is a vent diagram. What were you wearing? A crop top? I've seen it.

It didn't mean to be. cropped off. It was like, oh shit, it was Danny McGough and we spoke about this but we've seen Harry's rigo

for Harry. I've heard it was he was doing some sort of like disco office wear sort of vibe. Yeah,

I had, I had flares on but then I had like messages that was like fucking stacey to you. It was more of her

inferno than flares. They were class. I didn't say I didn't like them. No, Dan's gritting his teeth. They're very close to

to us scared. I'll say this kid. Yeah. It looks a bit mental but But in 2026, I think you're pretty relevant there. I look like Jack Finnege.

I was about to say if Jack Finnegan turned up, we're all too scared to question it. Well, it was, someone was like the fucking kip of those kecks, but it's like, Adam wore a cowboy actor, Zach Brighton. It's the same thing, isn't it? Flares, Harry Stiles. Is it? Yeah.

I think so. So, yeah, I think it is. Yeah. Yeah. There's flares about, man. I got some mix reviews for my pants that I wore to Luke Combs in Paris. Which ones? I'm not showing up in to send a picture of them 500 times.

I absolutely fucking loved them. They're dead comfy and I think they're lovely. I know you, I've seen your story. Go on, Dan. Get it, Dan. I, I, I, I don't know. I love, I love. He loves that you love them.

I love that you love them, but I also love to feel riled. Like, I feel alive. And so does everyone that follows you. me because they're like, fucking hell, that what's going on. I'm like, I don't know. But let's ride this roller coaster together. He's either the most fashionable man or full special.

I don't know. It's exciting. What will he wear the next day? What will he do? Is he goading us? Is it to entertain himself because we're all against someone? I don't know. Out of him in 2020, what a shit himself?

I don't know. But it's exciting, isn't it? And let's be honest, your wardrobe's boring. mind boring. Is his fucking mental? Let's just ride the wave of this visual concoction together. I honestly didn't see them as that controversial.

I know that a bit of like a... I know that like a pair of jeans is not controversial. Yeah, I just think they're just patterned pants, man. The high-wasted paisley pants. They're not really high-waisted. I just have to pull them uploads because they're deadlong. Like, because they looked like, do it 80% of your body.

They look like they were 90% of a couch. It's, there is. But I love it, but I don't love it. I don't like a lot of it, but I do. I'm in love with it. That's a good way of, I just can't. When you do the mirror thing, I'm like, wow, I don't feel alive.

I feel alive. So you don't, you can still, we can do it at the fucking cardigan. But it's fun, isn't it? The shirt was nice. I really like the shirt. Shet was lovely. The pants not for you either. Do you know what?

I used to be a bit more out there with my clothes and probably not as much as they used to. I get it. And when I thought they're not awful trousers but I think people look at them

and go what? I think people know they couldn't pull them off. I think if you were with someone who had them on you wouldn't really be asked. Do you know what I mean? It's because it was a picture.

It's a picture. Everyone's just judging you're going fucking hell. If you're with them they go they're mad and then get home to day and then get home to day. I think it's because everyone's got the time

to go, what the fuck a day they are. Yeah. By the way, Hey, I reckon 70% of the messages I got. Or like, they're the fucking sickest things I've ever seen. Same. Harry Potter.

Don't. Stop doing derisory fucking stories, lad. They're great. Shut up. Derisery, nice. I like them. I'm going to wear them for the next pod. You wouldn't see them, though. What?

You understand though? I'll just fucking... Actually, you will. You'll see them. They came to a man. Yeah. So you're collarbones and on show You can see them

I'll just sit here like this the whole phone Oh Listen I know a lull when I hear one Brick Yeah not on but neck though I think everyone should sign up to our patron If you haven't already

If you just listen and watch As a public lid You can become a member of the lid army Sign up at patreon.com slash have a word pod For literally 50 specials that are now on the Patreon. And if you're not a patron, you're wondering what do they do? If you go over to our

YouTube, you can watch our biggest special album for free. Go, wow, that's sick. I want to see more. And then go be a Patreon. An exclusive episode every Wednesday, me, Adam, Carl, Harry, Stee, Josh, and the rest of the lads. It's the best value patron in the world. Sorry, and I think if you're not already signed up, you don't deserve it. So actually don't sign up. I don't agree. I don't agree. And we've done this tactic before. Go back up. It's my vibe. I think they should have been signed up years ago. And I think anyone who signs up now actually doesn't deserve it. But I think they know deep down.

What if you only just turn 16? What if you've just turned 16? I'm not talking to 16 year old man. You can if you want. Are I fellow kids? It's a great sales bitch all around. There's accusations of paedophilia and, you know. But the point is...

It's cheaper than six and seven. What is the point? Don't sign up. No, do sign up. Oh, do sign up. Or don't. You child. No, you should sign up no matter.

what, but you don't deserve what we're given yet if you haven't been signed up for a while. You do, we love you all. Unless you're 15 and it's not your fault and stay away from Carl. Okay, so we will do some... For their balls. Listen, I am a little short of sleep and I still have green paint on from yesterday. I feel a little weird, but laughing about your fashion has really perk me up. Let's ride that wave. And if you don't like the question, we'll just move on. I've prepped some stuff. Sean says, question for you, Lids.

For the rest of your life, you can only go on holidays to two countries. Only rule is, you can't have been to the country before. Oh. So you get to pick two. And I'm going to say, no, that's it. That's the rules. Two holidays. I've got, I'm never going to see my nan again.

Oh, my dad. No, that's not a holiday you've gone to see family, is it? Well, why don't they come over here? Your Turkish nun has been taking the piss with that. She hasn't been here since 2001. Oh. Wow. What was happening in 2001?

What month? It was for my birthdays. It actually was September. Oh, fled, did she? I don't know. Fucking bet you she did? Yeah. I'm going to go sunny and snowy.

There you go. Mexico. Can you be ass going all the way to Mexico? Every time you want a bit of sunshine. A sunshine. A sunshine. assume that's a sunny one, that's not a snowy one. No, the skiing in Mexico is not what it used to be.

Global warmer, man. Yeah, man. Where's the other one? I've been... I've been... Like, I've been loads of good places. You've ruined it with your little addendum, but I've stayed it better.

Otherwise, you just pick two nights guys. I can't pick anywhere, because I don't know if anywhere is shite. Barbados in South Korea. Have you been to Barbados? Barbedos and South Korea. But I don't know whether it's any good, do I? Jamaica. It's not bad, is it?

We don't know. We haven't been. It's not back. You're going to get the goal. Bloody Alba. This is shite. Where's sunny in Europe? Ah!

Portugal. I've never been Portugal. Have you not? No, I've been to Lisbon. Yeah, that's been to the capital. That is the capital of Portugal. Take that fuck her off. I love Portugal.

Morocco. I'll go Morocco. Pretty. Because it's top of Africa in it, but it's like Euro-African. like it's near Spain. Yeah. I don't mean ethnically.

I'm not saying I don't want to be surrounded by Africans. I'm fine with that, honestly. Same. What I mean is, the distance-wise, it's what, like three hours, three and a half hours? Extra half hour.

Yeah. So I'll do Morocco. And, ah, shh. Canada? Been to Canada? Holy shit, I've not been to Canada. Canada.

You get your big cities, you get your snore. Yeah, I'm going Mexico and Canada. Great pick. Morocco's fucking lovely, by the way. It is full of Moroccans. I don't mind, then. Oh, I'm okay.

Yeah. Go to make me to Hachim Zesh, mate. I'm going Thailand and Australia. I honestly couldn't be asked. I happened to go all the way there for that. They're not similar enough. Yeah, they are. They're both art.

What? I don't care about snow. No, it's not snow. It's like metropolitan, big built-up cities, cool. Australia? Like, I suppose. They're far away as well. But also it's quite cold down the south of Australia.

It's fucking not. Quite cold. It's a bit cold. No, it's an average of 22 degrees. It's quite cold compared to the Northby, where it's 50 degrees all year round. Yeah, it's going to south. But it's like, it's as hot as it ever gets here all the time.

I think you're thinking of New Zealand. The southern bit of New Zealand gets proper. Why Thailand as well? It looks like a laugh. Brasses. Is it the brasses? Yeah, fellas. I mean, it looks like a laugh, yeah.

I can't wait to go, boys. I'm so excited. Apparently, apparently it's mental. I don't have cocks. No, they've got brasses. A third of them have AIDS. Nice.

Just don't go to them once. Yeah, I had a mate that went who, he slept with a brass, but he didn't realize that it was a brass. He thought, like, he was getting hit on, took her back and, yeah,

and then ruin the rest of his lads holiday because he had to take, like, AIDS blockers. But you want to go, you want to get the cock on? Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

Sorry. He had to take AIDS blockers. Yeah, like, yeah, because he was... He had unprotected sex with a... If she's got AIDS, he's now got AIDS. Not necessary. Well, she didn't... It's like a three-sided coin.

You mean pre? Is he on prep for life? No, no, no. It was like... He had sex with the prostitute. The prostitute didn't end up having AIDS. That's good. But he had mad health anxiety about it. There's no AIDS blockers, though? It was some sort of like...

Are you certain there's no AIDS blockers? More and after pill. Sorry, Mr. Focin'AIDS over here. No and everything about AIDS. You can't... you someone who's got AIDS and then take a little bit of a parisicism on and it's like, do you know what? No, we'll send that AIDS back. I mean, vitamin C's

not going to do any harm in that situation. There's got to be some sort of antibiotic. Like, like Plan B for, Plan A? No. Plan Aides. Yes. Pre-expo. Oh, no, that's just prep. No. Pollocks. Your mate was taken fucking multivitamins.

You've got AIDS. I mean, it was fine. No, I think. I've not seen him since. Could be dead. I'd go to France. Even though it made sense, it needs a screech. It's only over there, isn't it? And you got the south of France? You've got the...

France. How is Gay, Paris? I didn't get to do what I wanted to there because I was incapacitated by this fucking stomach bug that is just delayed the start of this section. I don't know what's going on, but yeah, Paris is great. It was too hot as well. It was 35 degrees.

35 degrees walking around a built-up city. It's just not nice. It's just not comfortable. I'd rather it be pissing. Is it for a couple? Is it a couple's holiday, my head? I seen my mate sent me a reel today because he knew I'd just been with Alex and it was two American like stoners on a podcast and they're talking about how Paris and France but especially Paris is for women. France is for women in it? They are right. Is Leon for women for women?

Well it's not for the boys is it? Do you know what I mean? If I said to you, should we do a boys trip to Paris? You'd be like, why? I think it'd be the first one ever. No, rugby. You've done a boys trip to Paris?

Yeah, that's different. For the footy? Yeah. For the UFC? Yeah, but that's for, like, you went for that? You didn't go for Paris? You went because that's where that was.

If that was in fucking Brussels, you'd have been in Brussels. Yeah, I don't think it is. A boys got. I think I'm going to take, I think I'd take Laura to Paris. I think I need to start. I need to take her for a spa afternoon

because I've, the only people I've been with, is Matt, Ishan and Bondi. So that needs sorting out. Take it for a spa afternoon in Paris. You've never been to a spa in a way. I've been for three spar afternoons or with my mates.

And I need to, that needs rectifying. And when I saw Adam and Alex in Paris, I was like, that is something you've got to tick off with your lady. Yeah, no kids. Don't take the kids. Don't take the kids. It's funny going on a, like,

like proper city breaks with Alex because she's got, like I've got very minimal interest in touristy stuff. You know, like going, in the Louvre and like going the Eiffel Tower and all that sort of stuff. I like kind of want to do it once and then

I'm done and if there's a big queue I'm not bothered. She's so not arced. Like we went the Eiffel Tower. We went to the second floor because there's a macadone shop and she wants to go to that macanone shop. Right. And then I was like, should we walk like 200 yards so we can get a picture with DeVille Tower? She was like

we know we've been. Like I'm just not ass. She was like, should we just get a taxi and go, I'm going to buy two teeth. She's just not bothered about the tour of stuff at all. We walk past to Lube and it was early and I was like maybe we can go the Louvre and she was like if you want it turned off it was closed on Tuesdays anyway so we didn't bother but I had a little head short that's the dream and like so you're sort of doing it but if there's any like hindrance you're like can't be asked

she did like we said we'd plan to I plan Monday she'd planned Sunday and she just booked us into like all the best cocktail bars in Paris Maria she's just like I just don't want to do any of this tour of shit. I just want to go and have cocktails. Are you listed Laura? There's another way. There's another way! But isn't cocktails in every country, though?

Does Laura make you're going to pictures of buildings? You're not asking us about and stuff? No, but she doesn't book in a cocktail piss up. I tell you that. To me, there's bars in every city. You could be in any city. I know you're in a French one, so it's cool. But like...

It's kind of a interest, though, in it? No, no. I'm not saying that, but I'm saying, for me, you have to couple that up with, oh, we're in this place, let's go and see the shit that they've got to show us. See, well, for me, it's the restaurants. I want to go and do the local cuisine

and the best place that does it. Yeah, the local food, because you're getting that way. That's more important to me than taking a picture of the Arcta Stranth. I don't even know where that is. I think it's going to be in Washington. Have you got another country?

Cuba. France and Cuba. See, I don't mind that. You got one long one, one short one. Yeah, and also they've got, like, cars, not on me? They have got cars, yeah. But it's like fancy cars. I don't know that.

No, they've got cars that. because no one lets them import anymore. They look cool though, isn't he? No, but they're banged out. Cadillacs from the 1950s, aren't they? Can't drive anyway, but you can sit there. Poverty looks cool, man, as long as it's in Cuba. And say, you know, I just think cars, cigars.

Bars, mate. You can't drive and you don't smoke? I smoke a cigar on occasion. I chong on a cigar. See, what the last time you had a cigar? Have you had one this year? Um, no. We're in the second half of the year.

You gave me one at the arena after show. It's only when there's cameras about, you know what I mean? So you want to go to Cuba to smoke a cigar that you don't like? Yeah, because I can put it on Instagram and be like, and then if someone's in Florida, I can be like, hello. That is what most people want a cigar for.

Oh, 100%. Oh, 100%. I've got five Cubanos in my sideboard draw of, like, just waiting for the big event. I can't remember why I spent that money. It was for something big. It was for something. big.

And then... It was your wedding and then they didn't get used because someone else had got some. So they're there and hopefully Eta doesn't find them

and smoke them for Instagram. You know what she's like. Get back on my nine-year-old chung and a Kubano. She smoked five cigar. But that's what? If you catch a smoking one,

you're gonna make smoke one, you make a finish the lot. If there was no addendum on it and you could only pick two countries, are we all the same too? Is it Italy and America? No. No.

No. Japan, just an absolute banker for me and Costa Rica. I love Costa Rica, loads on the wind. So I was going for the hot weather. You can only visit two places forever. Costa Rica and Japan. My favourite holiday that we've done,

beach was Costa Rica and my favourite country in the world is Japan. And in Japan, you can ski in the north, you can tropics in the south and you've got the cities in the middle. So I'm missing out on nothing. All right, Louise Redneck. I need the explanation on that.

Balance of the left. The jokes of them. Here I am in Japan. Louise Rednap? Yeah. Thug in the middle. She did the vision of it. He's not wrong.

Twist the wheel. All right. Steelers. Steelers wheel. Okay. Next question. Where would you be if you could go anywhere? I know what you mean about America,

but I feel a bit annoyed about how the last few years is. So I need to sort of detach from that a little bit. Just detach from the political climate down and have some fun. Yeah, but it is a disgrace, in it? Yeah. But, you know, he'll die. So that'll be all right. talk about Biden, yeah?

Yeah. Biden. Awful. I get it with America. I like the formation of one, one close, one far. Is a,

is a good shout. So I like a Portugal and a Portugal. You've got your Portugal, you're the Americans. You've got your near ones, like your Portugal's, your Spines. You've got your far-flown ones,

you're the Americas, you Cubas. Ben says, would you rather have to, wear shoes for 20 hours a day or only be allowed to wear shoes for five hours a day. It doesn't have to

be all in one. Just got a total time limit. 20 hours a day. Yeah. Oh, wow. Five hours for me. I don't think I'm walking for five hours a day, so if I'm in the building, I just take the shoes off. I think it's going to be a bit of a ball, like if you've got a busy day and then the alarm goes off and you

have to take your shoes off and you're in the middle of London. What if you go out for the club? Ah, you've got to think about clubbing car that you're always doing. The club is very central to my life. Fuck, the club might change the 20 hours. No, but I reckon you go to De Clurb maybe once a year. Yeah, we've got to Clope.

And I think that, I think that night in De Clurb will be so bad that it would be worth having shoes on for 20 hours a day for the rest of the year. You look like a shower in Monk. I love having my shoes off. Listen, I enjoy an hour in Pop World like the best of them, once every 18 months. But you need your shoes on in there, don't you? Yeah, but maybe if I don't. Do I know...

Just wear slippers all the time? Do I know this rule? Like, it's not like a... Yes, I think you have to know this rule. Okay, so for the first part of that... I'm going to club. So what time are we going to club? You're getting there for 11.

I like. I'll just not wear shoes until 10 to 11. Oh, you're pre-jing drinking at home? It's pre-no shooing. Yeah, I'll just wear not wear shoes all day. Put them on for the club. Go on at 4 o'clock? Yeah, but it's a night where they lock you in for six hours.

Like, we can do all change the panama than you want. It's a night where they give you three shoes as well. 72 hour drinking festival at Pop World where you're not allowed to leave. It's definitely 20 hours for me. The fact that I've got my shoes on now is alien. I've usually got them off. Alien?

Alien? It's like you're talking about, I've never seen you wear anything, but no, that's not true. You got married. Apart from when you got married, you wear comfy trainers all the time.

When you're saying shoe, to me, that's just footwear. I don't like wearing footwear. But you wear the most comfortable. We live in it. We're so lucky as men in 2020. that we can spend 99% of our shoe wearing time in phenomenal, like, trainers.

All the time. It's fucking great. So, the women, though. What? So I look at ways... No, I'm not talking about women. I'm talking about men 40 years ago. Oh, right.

I'm wearing brooks all the fucking time. I'm working in leather, uncomfortable shoes. Oh, I've got to go to a pub. You need shoes. I'm going to the club. You have to wear fucking shoes. Like, you had a court appearance. And it's my thing.

You used to have to wear, like, shoe shoes as well. Where did you, you're not training isn't here, some. Sorry, mate, you need of oxen. No jeans. No jeans in the glow. Is that, mate, Tokyo Joe's, you needed shoes, trousers. You couldn't, they wouldn't like you'd get in jeans, and you had to have a collar. A collar with Tokyo Jones.

For Taki Jacks, pre-98-99, maybe. What kind of vibe was Tokyo Joe's? It was the only club. Well, no, there were probably other clubs, but it was the main club where every club was going. What were the girls with? You had to wear black tie. It was the Met Gala every Friday and Saturday night

in Preston Town Centre in the 90s. You got just the most aggressive, grumpy fucking bounces and it was just this, basically, do you look like you've dressed yourself at Burton's, you fucking mug? So what was the point of that? Was that to be like,

you look put together? It's just an old-fashioned load of bullshit. You can never wear a hat. That only really got phased out as we started going to town. Did it? Yeah. Yeah, we just... Say that, if I think of my cousins going out,

they always have black pants and black shoes on we just missed that and I think I've got a picture of me like early on like making the effort so that we got in my first ever night out in town I wore that outfit like the collar and the shoes and stuff didn't even know where to go so we got taxed back home again

but yeah and then I think that you got over there can't imagine ever go to do you ever go to the club in the shoes no I think that had gone by the time I was going out oh so the best thing ever I remember living in Manchester at one point and I think my mate, Matt had brought some of his Navy mates up, and we all met up, and I was drinking in the Northern Quarter, and I was wearing what, basically, what you'd wear now, like, everything's

more chilled out, but they hadn't done a lot of, like, town boozing. They were sort of in the old trend of, like, oh, you wear a, something smarter, and I walked past the bouncer, he let me in, and then he stopped them. This is me and you in the club? I'm going to have a look. Yeah, we're still in the club. Oh, let crystal from the buying. No, that was like... Oh my God, get to Ford Cove!

Yeah, but to me, that was... It's your birthday, so we want to look fucking cool. So that was... That was not far off. If you wanted to go out in Preston in the 90s, that's what you had to wear. That was like, it was your 21st? I think that was the Suzo.

I was an agree. That was like Hick Suso old. But by 2011, 2012, Manchester, like, and Coat, Northern Quarter, are gone yet, no, no, no. So wait, he let you in and they let me in. I was wearing a hat. I was wearing a hat.

And he was wearing... And he was like, yeah, your sound. And then the shift had gone the other way, and Northern Quarter was a bit cooler. And he was like, yeah, these are gimps. You're not coming in. Wow. Great.

I mean, we kind of fucked that bit of the night, but... Have you seen the shoes that look like you're not wearing any shoes? Do you know the ones that are like you can see the toes? They've got toes in. This is the Emperor's new clothes, isn't it? What? The Emperor's new shoes. Oh.

You're all thinking of the Emperor's new groove? Hello. similar. Have you seen people wearing them? The ones that... You have to train your feet to wear them. Yeah, I think they're going to get more and more popular.

Are they? Yeah. Apparently they're really good for your posture, but you look like a fucking... You have to train your feet to wear them. And they're like socks for your feet. You're not saying? Like gloves for your feet.

Yeah. Socks for your feet. They've been around a bit. Yeah. Do you remember Nike 25 years ago, Nike did a version of it? You couldn't wear socks in it, so everyone that wore them fucking...

They hummed after about two months. might get a pair. There's no way there. I mean, maybe I'm out of the fashion game, but what? There's like cooler versions of them. They're like running ones. But I think they are meant to be really good for you. Yeah.

Bondi's got some. But everyone's toes are different though, aren't they? No, he looks like a fucking cryptos. Everyone's got like, have you ever seen those like diagrams that like, you can trace your ancestry back based on which toes the longest? Are they making like They're making Greek ones Yeah

So it can't fit everyone's toes I mean like yours are in italics Yeah Yeah So they have to be Yeah It's not talking to each other on Yeah you're called West Bank Trottes

They're not fitting in them West Bank Trottes We are the West Bank Trottes We are the West Bank Trotties Don't need this one then There's so many just like Individual lines That out of context are phenomenal

You've got a For a future quiz There's been some ballets You need to give us two years to forget we've said them. Oh, I've got a bad. I don't think he does, you know. You need to give us 10, 20 minutes. I forget the news.

I think West Bank Trotters is going to stick with me for a wee-wah. Like Fasha Kabusi did. Exactly. Points to anyone who can remember Fashakabusi. We're going to do some over-unders. Nice. It got suggested as a feature. We'll see how it goes.

See how it goes. Is it over-on-es? Over under or under Or under Needs work Nathan says In your life Under or over 20 plates dropped

And smashed Under Under Well over Yeah Harry Well over This year

Thank you for your honesty This year I'm on at least five That's not true That can't be true Five plates dropped this year In your new house You only get five in a box You're the next fucking box

I've done a pasta bowl Do you know what I've done maybe two or three this year But I've done quite a few glasses I've done shit tons of glasses actually On the floor to smash On the floor, yeah Like I'll knock them

I almost did it last night as well I'll just like I'll put them at the side When I'm washing the dishes And then sometimes I just like swipe it Not on purpose But like I'll turn to grab my phone Sometimes it just cackles and they explode

Well under for me Yeah I think under George Booth says George Booth has got a few Over or under 100 minutes of breath held in your lifetime. 100 minutes? A hundred minutes a year for me. Yeah, because when you're swimming?

When you play the game where you're like in the pool, you go, how long can I do it for? Yeah, but it's not like you're doing that loads of times a year. That is basically the main breath problem. Sleep apnea? Yeah, no, I'm well over. I'm over. Sleep happening, you can't be clusters. Right.

Have you got the sleep perhaps? I don't know. Sometimes my birds. there's that, like, cute worries have died because I'm not breathing, but then I just go, and then I'm back on. Like Nixon?

How are you sleeping, love? That game in the pool, though, I reckon I went through a big enough phase as a child where I've not gone off already. I will play that next month in Mexico with Seneca every day. Yeah. So there's at least two minutes a day.

Probably. You play it every day? Yeah, we're such kids in the pool. Like we... But you're adults in the bedroom. I don't for kids in the bedroom. I wasn't, I was just doing a playful, sexy thing.

Oh, right, okay. Overall under, 40 trees climbed in your life. What? What's this wrong with this? 40 different trees. Because maybe when I was a kid that I'd clown the same one,

maybe 10 times. Like, whatever, but no. I think I'm under three. No, I said I didn't have the dexterity for it. I don't think I did more than five. Yeah, I don't, climbing trees was just, who's doing that? I'm deaf, I'm under five.

Yeah. Not many. My dad fell out... 40? Who is this? My dad fell out of a massive tree. When he was a kid fell out of a massive tree

and broke like both his legs and his jaw and was in hospital for six weeks. So I wasn't really allowed to climb trees at all in my childhood. He fucked it for you, yeah? Yeah. Rewened that?

So that was one of those ones where you're like, well, you've heard of sorry about your dad. I don't know if I've done 40. I had a rope, tie a swing on me tree in the back garden when I was growing up. My dad had set up for this.

Chimp. There was one of them in the woods near our house that everyone had a swing on. But if you swung out properly, I think it was quite a steep drop. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's about maybe 40 metre drop you're dead probably.

Yeah, if you did that. Yeah, you're dead, yeah. That was a great, you spend an afternoon doing that risking me on. Death, oh, death, oh, death, I won. the 40. Alex Honnold. No adults climb more than 10.

Bear grills, I haven't even done that one. George Booth says, over or under, does bear grills climb trees? Is this a parable? Does he shit in the woods? I mean, if anyone's climbing, the trees, it's bear grills in it.

You can have the trees that escape the giraff. Surely, like, his whole thing is, like to survive in the wild, isn't it's like, no, we've got to climb this tree to get all the scrann that I left up there. Drink me pissate bear grills I'd left Scranton tree That's his bare grills after the fucking

Major brain Jackson in the seat He'll be drinks pissing that knows Doesn't he? I bet he doesn't I bet he does Limitless Yeah they're like

Do you want something from You might he's like I'll just have piss No they'd started doing Dr Pepper Zero I don't think they do piss on time No but he won't He'd be like I can't be ass getting up I'll just have me piss He ors he ors

He always responds it doesn't he bites the head off bats And he eats them like throobes Right because bat blood is as good as water apparently somewhere do bat sleep there's no way

bear grills there's bats and eats them like froobs yeah I mean there's one person on another person like there's no way he kills bats

and eats them like frubes I've seen it see not he's it doesn't say like a froub on Google like it's that is that legal can confirm to say that

I think he does it in like he's not doing it like the bat enclosure of chest is here like he's He's in the wild, man.

Bear Grills is in again. Get old. There's one he did in Wales. He slept in a camel, didn't he? He slept in a sheep in Wales. But he was like next to like... There's loads of Airbnb. Yeah, he was like next to the A301.

What? He slept in a sheep. He slept in a camel. He cut open a camel. Yes. Oh, like Star Wars? Yeah, Luke Skye. Yeah. Return of the Jedi.

Is it not Empire? I think it's Empire. Is it Empire Strikes Bar? Yeah. Have you watched all the? Three? Oh, that's the new hole. And then climbed in for warmth.

Yeah? He did the sheep in Wales, but he was like next to an A road. It was July as well. Is he getting enough pussy? Bear Grills. Is he getting laid enough? Is he married? He's got all these scout badges, honey?

Oh, well, then, yeah, he is, then, yeah. I've got the pussy badge. Does that his real name as well? It's a sick name, and he? Yeah, he's just dead posh, isn't he? Grills as well? Oh, no, he's not. It's fucking not.

His name's probably like Thomas Aquinas or something. Edward. Michael Grills. Thomas Aquinas! What? He's been to France, I know, he's probably the venerable beat.

What's his name? Edward Michael Grills. Edgoyles. No, it's not. No, it's not. Edward Michael Grills. Yeah. Brough.

Bear grills is better. No, bear. Brer grills. Thomas Aquinas. Wow. Who's he again? But I'm not 100%. Is he a writer?

Isn't he a lawyer, isn't it? I feel like he's like a biblical gimp. Like a massive gimp, back in biblical times. You are a biblical gimp. What? He's an Italian-Dominican friar and priest. From when?

There you go. From 12, he died in 1274. What? Where? Where? Where? I want to know where. Find the link.

I knew as many of you. Where's, where? Where's that come from? There's probably a Luke Combs song. I need to know. It'll be a Luke Combs song. It has to be. Like Thomas Aquinas.

Find the link. He was big for us, I think. He was the theological. I remember the name of Aquinas from school. He was big in our school. I think we had like Thomas Aquinas. We called something. We all dressed up like him and sang his songs.

He's really not wrong. Did he name you, there was one of your houses like named after it? No, we were named after like, Different groups of people who've come to the country and pillaged. I was in the Tudors. There was the Vikings. There was the Romans.

Stewart. Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They pillaged. Let it go. Let it go. The old rape and pillaged Tudors, who came here from Tuderton. They came here from...

Tudestan, mate. Formerly Istanbul. He came up with the five ways for proving... Can't you all? That's why you know him. He came up a fucking five wave. Put around them out in the middle of that lad. That's how you know him.

What did he do? He came up with the five waves. He was a theologist who did, it's either Thomism or Thomism. I imagine it was Tomism. Yeah, and it was Tomism. No, I don't know. Thomism.

Maybe it's a thylum. Yeah. I have. Yeah, so he was just a philosopher who came up. The five ways of what? The five ways of proving the existence of God. How do we... What are they?

We will have done that and screw you know. That is ringing a bell. Oh, we're going to the time. Or bear. You're real name. Bear Aquinas. Bear Aquinas, mate. It's all like in old language that I can't really understand.

Try. English. Modernize it. So it's the argument of the unmoved mover. Whoa. Pop what? We can see some things that are changing. Whatever is changing is being changed by something else.

If that by which it is changing is itself changed, then it too could be being changed by something else. We did do this. Fucking L, Tom, clear it up. I don't know what that means. What? Xcon, give it to. He also, yeah, he was...

Number three got a bit weird. He featured on a DMX. Number four was... D-MX. Thomas Aquinas. Do you Google him? I'm going to see if we can find an easier explanation. No. Number one is the unmoved mover.

Number two is the fear of change itself. It's proof of change itself. And number three, X-goon, give it to you. Oh, wow. He looks, there's a belt of barrette. Yeah. Is it one of those monk barnets? Yeah, it's like front heavy.

Front heavy? Yeah, as he has all the fronts of his head. party in the front, notting in the back. Yeah. Tremendous fun. I knew he was a biblical gimp. It was just in there that,

do I mean? To me, they'd have gone with like an aid to like Samuel Peep's or something. Yeah, it's the same air of that. Yeah.

Like Samuel Peep's. It is, though, in it? The theology. What did Samuel Peeper do? He wrote a book about the Great Far of London that nearly buried in.

If I was like, read this lad and it was called the Greyfard of London. Bruce Thomas Beckett. Is he the one that the king killed? I think he was a wicker keeper. Bowling Beckett.

Oh, catch him Beckett. The Archbishop of Canterian became a saint. That's in my head as well from that era. Fun times. Cromwell. You're just saying history words.

No, but like Cromwell went the booze with Thomas Aquinas, didn't he? All of Cromwell knew Thomas Aquinas, I think. I think they compared notes on the first ever World Cup for 400 years. Samuel Peep's done a book,

hasn't he? You live closer to Oliver Cromwell and Thomas Aquinas. Where do you live? I live. Thomas Squires on the five way. Break time.

Yeah, but like sort of doing anything like that like climbing Kilimanjaro. We were talking about climbing Kilimanjaro and if you haven't watched the Kilimanjaro special yet

go and watch it but any interest in a feat like that, mountains? No. Don't really like charity work. Huh? No, I'm joking. I know, I just, you know what, I'm lazy.

Yeah, that's the truth of it. I am a lazy person. Yeah, we're an old warehouse is here. It's like, I get a vibe, though. That's the person who didn't want to climb it. I get the vibe. Lily Phillips is here, by the way. Love the audience.

Nothing like that, no. You wouldn't like want to say you'd done Everest. No. I packed it in. I've done a couple of marathons and packed it in after that. Oh shit. Have you done a marathon? I've done a couple.

But they take so much time. to do. About four hours, yeah. No, as in the training. Yeah. So it's like, it's pointless if you want to do anything else in your life. I've signed up for a few marathons myself.

Oh, but it absolutely sucks the life, aren't you? No, he signs up but doesn't do it. He just doesn't do the training. Freeze up time. Did you actually do the marathon, though? No, I got COVID three times. Oh, my God. That wiped me out of a few of them.

I've done a half. I've done a half. Nearly. Yeah. How quick was your marathon? I did three hours, 57. Oh, well, that's good, isn't it?

That's really good. Which ones did you, like a proper... Yeah, I did London and Paris. Oh shit. Paris, eh? Paris was the one I was signed up for because I like the idea. Everyone does London. I was like, I think I'll just do Paris, you know, Paris. Yeah, yeah. But that triple COVID really hit hard job. Like, you can't train for a marathon when you've got COVID, man.

Right. I thought that was going to be the whole statement. You can't train for a marathon. I guess. I was all. track. I was. Like, I was on a full training plan and I got COVID like two weeks before

I went, so I was like, ah, split off. Good job. I'd never book me flights. That had been a fucking complete waste of money. But no marathons again. No. No. No. I'm too busy working. I'd rather work and

do something that's actually like a bit more fun. Would you train for the fight? I've been offered a fight. I imagine the the, the, what use a fight on their cards, all these influencers. Yeah. But it has to be a big bag. How much, how much you want for a big fight?

You're talking like, misfits, are they? Maybe over 200K. 200K? Yeah. It's the months out you've got to take to train and stuff like that. Yeah, it's a lot, yeah. Right now I get like, blown over by Augusta Wynne, so I need to like, I need like a year at least.

Would you be four? Probably not. I'd probably pack it in like you. Who'd you want to fight them? Got COVID. Who do you want to fight them? played? Leonard the plug.

We, like, we, like, we speak up on her. She's the one who, like, erred and her husband do, like, a porn podcast. Yeah, we could have a cook-off with the husbands. Yeah. So they get, like, what they're making. They get, like, porn stars on, interview them on the podcast,

and then they wellie the porn star together. Never seen it. I'll have to do some research. Why here? Have you done their show? No, I did. We did talk about it together. And then obviously our boyfriends are both like big cooks.

So we were like that would work really well. Is it from, it's not from a place of animosity? No, no, really. I catch up with her before her husband and stuff like that. So would you want them to fight as well? Or just watch you fight? I think just watch. That's all they're good for, aren't they?

You could do like a two-on-two, like the Dudley brothers in the... Yeah, a tag to you. Yeah, that'd be fucking sick. The first two-on-two misfits boxing. I'd watch it. Yeah. I've been the first misfits card I've actually watched. 200K seems doable for them.

You'd be a big drawer or a misfit card. I hope so. I mean, the thing is when you talk with only fans girls, they earn good money as it is. So it's like, why are they going to fanny about going in a ring to earn this money?

So you've got to put out a large amount. Yeah, and then you may be doing your content with like two black eyes for a month. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Is there? Yeah.

Panda porn. Traverse panda. if anything, isn't it? Yes, it is. Thanks for pulling me up on that one. If I work out in a day, I am not riding that day. Like, I'm not getting on top. Because it knackers me. I don't know about you guys. I can't do anything after the gym. I'm always on top me, to be fair. Like that's like, staple position. For three seconds. I'm like, no.

I've been doing the, what's the hip thrust one? It's taking me two. Missionry. Missionary. Yeah. In the gym, I've been doing missionary. I've been asked to leave several times. What's the, it's the one where you're sort of like fucking the weights into the sky. Oh, you put it on your, you put it over your hips. Yeah, it's the day. So, Cal Girl, but you're fucking up from the bottom. Like, no, but I, in the gym.

The actual, what's called Cowgirls? I've got to stop sexualising all the gym equipment. I know you mean. The hip thrust. It's just, it took me two years to get over my toxic masculinity because it looks like you're fucking the air in the gym. And it's mainly a girl. Yeah, to get the bum a bit bigger.

But my, I want my bum a bit bigger. I want my bum a bit bigger. I want me. one with a bigger because I'm like Dorito shaped, I know what you mean. Have you ever done shoulder shrugs? You never look more pathetic than when you do because you're gone.

Than I do, aren't they? No, it's the ones where you get on your heels. What's for? Oh yeah. You just stand up on your heels. When you're doing your little car phrases. Yeah, yeah. You look like a twat.

Looks like you're training to talk to your neighbour over the back fence. You're like John? All right, John. How good? Why didn't you just stay stood up the whole time? Why are you going up and down? Why would you be going up and down?

Because I've hurt me toes. Fair enough. Can I agree. Well, call out. We'll call out Lennel of the plug now then. Not much of a call or outer. Lanna, if you want to fight,

we can do it. Wow. As long as we get paid as long. Fighting so. But it'd just be for the money. That's the thing. I don't know if I could do them up that much of a, like a big audience that would want to watch.

Yeah, but you're a name now. Like, they would want to watch you fight. You're going to have to work on your trash talk and I'll get, like, I'll tell you that. Yeah. Yeah.

If you're free, if you're available. Oh, nice. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Go, go, go, just go. I've got a hairy bum hole?

No, I don't know. See, this, this is... It doesn't have to be factual. Is that a bad thing? I think to have a hairy bum hole as a girl probably not the best, but I mean, do what you were with your body. There's a market for that as well.

Yeah. Do you guys have hairy bum holes? Do you keep it? I'm a man. I have a hairy bum hole. I shave mine. I don't know how you guys... Like wipe your eyes.

I don't. I wash my ass with a toilet seat. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You get in the shower after? I used to, but now I've got a special toilet seat. Nice. I'm not having a pooy bum. Yeah, first.

Massively hairy, but clean as a whistle. Facked. Yeah. I give mine a little shave. I used to, but like, I don't know. What about veting it? Me feet? Veting it.

Waxing, basically. No, no, it's like a hair removal cream. Oh, yeah. No, so I did that once. And it's like when you use that, um, Mint and tea. Original sauce. The original sauce.

It's like that, but like on fucking steroids you've eat your asshole and it's like hardwood flooring. It's like you've like done the kitchen. You know like when you get like new floor in the kitchen it's like that but in your asshole. But honestly it's like there's just like a small child

blowing on your asshole for days. You should put that in the advert. So it's like the hot and cold burn. Yeah, we're selling point of it. You know when you're being your assail so much that it becomes cold. No. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's the tea tree thing. No, I've done that. It's more me under me bollocks. Like me gooch. Yeah.

Yeah, but imagine that on your bum hole. No? I don't want. I hate it. I purposely don't buy that shit. I don't buy that shit because of that. It's good for the summer though. He's not getting his arsehold out on a beach.

No, but the tea tree stuff's good for the summer. That's when I use it. Why? Because it cools you down for about five minutes and then you're fine. I'm dove all you around me, especially in the special area. Like sometimes if I'm traveling, like I'm low on. me dove. I just used my dove for

my co. And then I'll use the hotel stuff for my underbit because at one point I thought I had a severe STD and I went to the clinic and I was like, listen love, something wrong with this to the point where I seen it on Saturday. It was Tuesday. I was like, I seen it on Saturday and I haven't looked at my knob since because it's scared of me. Too scared, yeah. Yeah, you just don't look at it. It's not there. Ignorance is

bliss. And she had to look at it. I thought I had like herpy aids or so. I thought it was bad. And she was like, oh, what are you using to clean your cock with at the minute? I'm paraphrasing,

but you know, you get in the gym. I think she'd have said penis. And I was using that, is it Locetine or Lok Dyn? Not a doll. Super smelly. Yeah.

Yeah, they're all sweet. Like, it's the French, like, fucking 20 grand for a bottle about this big. It's an expensive one

and got us a gift. And she was like, yeah, it's doing no good for your knob there. And, uh, sure she was a doctor? Is she outside the doctor's surgery?

Was she a car mechanic? This is a prostitute or something. Fucking that, lad. Well, she told me, look, she went, look, I don't think we need to test you, but I will. And she did all the stuff. And she was like,

I'll send you a text in a few days see if I've found anything. She went, but for now, go and wash your knob with just dove or simple stuff. And, you know, in about a week or so, I reckon your knob will be as good as new.

And, you know, I've got to text a few days later going, no AIDS, don't worry, whatever. And then a week later, it was shiny again. It was class. So what did your cock look like? So. What does it look like now or then?

Then? Like me Bell End looked like a strawberry. Right. So red. Not quite red. Like you know when it's like sort of coming out from like a strawberry is halfway between green to red? It's like pink colour. Wow.

But it had like loads of like, yeah. Oh, loads of dots in it? Yeah, it was thrush. Oh, so it's thrush? Yeah. It was shower gel induced thrush. Anyway, been using Dove ever since. Can we get the Dove sponsorship?

This has happened every six months for three years. Can we just get Dove as a sponsor? No, this is only one time. It won't dry your skin like normal soap. Yeah. But if I run out of Dove when I'm away, I can't wash me cock for days. They sell Dove like everywhere, though.

Yeah, you'd think. Well, I think a few people have got the same problem. So sometimes, you know, if they've been in the shop earlier in the morning, then you. It's like trying to get fresh bread from Lunko. Like sometimes they sell out. Epidemic of strawberry cock going around.

No, I used to use Dove soap on my fan. and it was pretty good. I used to we use it as face wash as well. Apparently you're not meant to use anything that you'd use on your bollocks on your face. Right. I'm saying like a TikTok about this the other day. What?

It said anything that's good enough for your bollocks isn't good enough for your face and anything that's good enough for your face is too good to use on your bollocks. Like even men, we should be having good skincare, cleanser, we should be using moisturiser, SPF every day, even if it's cloudy and raining should be having SPF on.

It's all good for you. I'm factor 50 on my balls, just in case. Can't be too careful. We should all be using Factor 50 every day. Is it 50? Seneca has 50 on every day. Seneca has the makeup,

like the moisturiser that has SPF in her. Yeah. She's protecting herself every day. Oh, what's trying to do? You're gonna... No, but I'm gonna be old. I'm old now.

So I'm gonna look cold. I'll also think the man... I say you're in your 40 years. Early or... Early. Thank you. I have an actual guess. I'll take it.

I don't. I have an actual guess. No, no, no. That's what I'd actually guess. No, like a... Okay, 41. Thank you, Lily. It's been a real pleasure

meeting you so far. I'm 45. Nice. What about you? I think you're about similar, aren't you? Nice. Love how this played out.

Tremendous. How's that SPF working? I haven't started using the SPF yet, but I've read up on it. Do you know what I'm making sure I get the right one? I just don't think there's anything wrong with being a wrinkly old

when you're old. When I'm 80 and everyone's like, oh, he didn't put SPF on when he was 11. You're like, who cares? Men age so much better than women. They just do. Men get better looking as they get older. Yeah.

Totally. Women age like fruit and men age like wine. Yeah. But they do peak out about like 60. Yes. Is that after that it's just old, old. It's not like... Yeah, it starts to get a bit like now you are like an old wrinkly bulls like.

But you don't mind old? No, I don't mind old. No. We've seen. Yeah. I do old. Like I'm not a versed it. Yeah.

Say it again? I've got 15 years and then I'm old, old. Now I'm just old, but then I'll be old, old, old. No, no, you're a good old right now. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Yeah, I think 60, you're old, aren't you? Yeah, it's when people stop being like, oh, he was too young when you die.

60, who said this today? 60 years too young to die. Yeah. Is it? Yeah, retirement age is, he can't work now because he might die any day. Do you want to be old old, because a lot of people don't? He doesn't want to get to, like, old old old. I would hate to,

Yeah, it just looks horrendous. But I also don't want to die. Okay. What are you doing about that? I'm going to figure it out along the way. I'll probably just get so much plastic surgery. It's like tape the face back. Yeah, but that's not going to help like your lungs, is it?

I don't know. I don't care about what's going on inside, just on the outside. Oh, so you could be dead. Oh, like you're going to just keep your face alive. Like I heavily vape every day. You know, like my boyfriend's looking my pussy. I'm vaping. I'm going for a wee.

I'm vaping. Like, I don't really care what's going on inside. I don't really work out. I don't do anything actually good for my body. But I want to look good on top. If I was eating my Mrs. Hout and she took a pull on and vape. Well, she doesn't vape.

So that'll be confusing. She goes when she's had a biff there. When she's had their belly. She's got a spark and her vape. Fucking alcohol. I'll go on TikTok while he's eating me out. No. He's like, because he doesn't want to disturb me.

So he's like, no, do whatever you need to do. So is he doing it for him then? Yeah, yeah. He loves eating me out. That's his, like, thing. He doesn't want to disturb you, but he's eating you know. Yeah. Don't mind me, love.

Honestly, no, I'd be like texting my mate. It's like just on, like, Instagram. I mean, from your perspective, that sounds class. Bit of a Bushman, is that, win it? Is that kind of blowjob just like, underneath your desk or something? Yeah, but if my missus came home, was like, do you mind if I suck you off while you're watching the match?

That's, yeah, I get it from you. Yeah? I'd be really upset if Laura started giving feedback on eBay while I would, was going down on it. I think there's a line where you're like... No, I need some attention, me. No, after a bit, I'll, like, you know, I'll give up or put the phone down,

put the vape down for a second. It's actually like, come or anything. But at the start, like, I'm, you know, I've got to warm up a bit, so I'm just like, I'm still got time to text. Well, would you ever text him? I don't have to read later. Like, this is great, by the way, don't forget it.

Love for, yeah. Yeah. No, I haven't actually rest in my opinion. You should do that. I think that I'd be, yeah. Yeah, I appreciate that. This is good. Yeah, this is okay.

And you're both just on your phones. How would you feel if he was checking his phone while you were nothing him off? I don't really mind. If I really want to do it, I'd let him go on his phone, whatever. Maybe it's because we've grew up in an age where I'm, like, obsessed with my phone. Like right now I know this podcast is going to be like an hour, so I'm like, can't go, can't vape or can't go on my phone for an hour. It's hellish.

We have, literally, you're not the only person in the room that suffers from that. we have a little break halfway through and everyone will go on the phone immediately. I love that. I love that. Sometimes I hate being social. I get so tired of talking to people. When you're in the pub with someone

and it's just you and them and they go to toilet and you're just on your own with your phone for a bit. Oh, it's heaven and you're like, why did I say it home? I just hope they're doing a massive dump just go and sort your life out in there

so I can just have a little. How quickly after sex do you go on your phone? Oh, like two seconds Oh, because I think there's a bit of like You're both want to, but you've got to do the little Well, he's like cleaning up the cum and I'm just like right Yeah, I can't, you know, I can't relate, but Where's the cum?

Like you're probably like on my belly or something like that So you're on your phone while he's wiping come off you? Yeah What are you doing? I normally throw a toddler and then go for the shower It's equally as bad Yeah, what's more like nothing? Yeah, it's equally bad.

Why is that bad? Yeah, I'll sort yourself out, sort myself out. See it in a minute and we'll watch the telly. Yeah, you don't have to do everything together. Do you mean? Why's that bad? Here's the towel you need to get all my come off you. I'm going to go and get all your come off me in the shower. If I spend like all the time of the day like having sex,

I couldn't do anything with my life. Like sex is so time consuming, especially in like in my personal life. Because usually I'm having sex for money. I'm like, right, well, now I've got to do it for free sometimes, you know. Just make them pay her. Yeah. Yeah. That's good at doing.

Text them a PayPal link. Before you finish, they're love, send. So at 200 grand, apparently, that's your price. Is that a thing? If you've worked in the day, are you less likely to... Yeah, sometimes... Like, I think that's everybody.

You know, if you've been, like, hard a hard day at work, you're like, oh... Roger Fender is not playing fucking badminton with his wife after Wimbled, is he? Yeah. No, it's not. Probably not. Is anyone else, though?

This is like when I have a wank... When I get into it, I'm like, oh, forget how much I enjoy this. But sometimes the thought of this, I'm like, it's so much effort, I can't be asked. But like, I get into it and I'm like, yeah. Do you ever remember you forgot you've having a wank? Do you ever do that? Yes. You go, you're having to have one, yes.

And you go, oh, I can have one. Do you ever do that? Yeah. Never. Really? No, you know why? Because I know at the end of every day, I'm probably going to have a wank. There's chocolate in the fridge.

Oh shit, I can have some chocolate. Yeah. Mine's booked in mentally. Do you have a certain time? hit in every day. You're bedtime before sleepies. But is your partner?

Laura, my wife, does she sleep in the bed with you when you have the wang? No, so since we've had babbers, we've been in separate rooms and it's just become a big wank fest in my room. It's that quite nice. It's tremendous.

It's tremendous. It's brilliant. It's really good. But it does mean you are knocking one out quite regularly. Question note, because I totally understand you've been at work all day,

you're goosing about and that and you come home and you're like, the last thing I want to do be Goosing in the whilst again. But don't you enjoy Goosing with your fella more than with the people you're welcome with? Yeah. That was a lie.

Yeah. It's a different kind of sex. Yeah. Like I can just lie there and do niche, you know, just turn over. Like, I like to do a deady. So, like, I play dead. And that's, like, my favourite type of sex. It's like where you just don't.

Where you don't have to do anything. I think it's because I do so much in the bedroom when I'm working. I like to do a deadie at home. Wow. So I'm no fun in the bedroom Like what if he rings like an ambulance I know but like I'm I'm still breathing Oh but he goes Lily and you're like

Oh I'm playing daddy and he goes And he still phones the ambulance I'm playing daddy Rise I'm calling the ambulance I don't believe you're dead Like go on one side So you're not you're facing the same way So it's like you can kind of just like be asleep

If you wanted to I couldn't do that because I'm doing the work Yeah that's true Yeah I know what you mean about where You said earlier about working out, you're not like going on top after that. Like if I've played five aside,

I'm just a meat stick for the night, me. I'm lying on me back. I'll get it hard for you. And you crack on, girl. I'm doing a daddy. No,

I'll still make the faces and the noises and be like, oh, lovely that or whatever. Like a 68 year old Lancasham out. I felt in that. Cracking tit. All right, yeah, nice. I'll be enthusiastic

whilst not be, you know, after five a side. I hobble into, you know, pick up an injury every week. My hamstrings are getting to the point where they're like... Yeah. But I crack on when I can.

Right. So if I get home and she's like, we're fucking tonight. I'm like, yeah, sound cool. You know, stretch out your hammies love because you're doing all the jobs. I'm a meat stick. You're doing the running.

Huh? I'm a meat stick. Yeah, I don't mind being a meat stick. Is your girlfriend quite like, right, we're having sex. I'm getting on it. She can be, you know? If she's a...

You know, if she's, if she's, if she's full of it and it's been a few days, then yeah, like, absolutely. Yeah. Full of what? He's already full of cum. I'm full of it, me. Oh, right, right. Like woman comp. Oh, okay, yeah, yeah.

If she, if she's like, like, for an example. Because if I say I'm full of it, it's usually like a cold. Well, aptly, like, I was in London for four days, five days. And I've come back and she was raring to go because as I went to London, she was on the blob, like, you know, timed well, really. And, uh, I got. back and she's being quite keen, but I've had food poisoning for a few days, so I was like, we can't really love because I might poo on you. So we haven't for a few days, and she keeps, she's being like, I want to, you know,

let's have a goose tonight. Tap when you on the shoulder? I'll try, like, you know. But I'm a sicky, sickie meat stick. Gotta be careful. Yeah, I just, uh, yeah, she, if she wants to demand her, she can demand it. Yeah. Yeah.

What are you doing after you've, you know, done all the fucking and the wanking? What do you mean? What do you do? you're not like doing... Doing this shit. Yeah? If you're not podcasting, you're not having sex.

What is it? If I'm not working? Have you got any fucking... No, I've got any fucking... No hobbies. No hobbies. You know what? Yeah, literally.

Really good. I focus so much on my work. Like, when I get downtime, I'm just so flat out. Are you just on your phone? Yeah. You're not watching a film or something? I can't.

I don't have the attention span for it anymore. Yeah. I think that generation is just TikTok. Oh. So bad. I hate it. I was thinking about getting hypnotised to not enjoy it anymore.

You could do that. Yeah. Let it work. I don't know. Apparently if you make your screen black and white, it makes a big difference because you can do that. You've got an iPhone.

Yeah, yeah. There's a setting where you can make the screen either black and white or it's got like a red tint to it to everything. And because you're not getting the variation of colours. Right. So we've got a life of a dog then really.

Huh? Just got a life of dog. Just not seen black and white. Yeah, but the dogs are never on TikTok, so it must work. That's real. Okay, then what do you want to enjoy, but you have, like, do you not go, I wish I could do that hobby, but I can't be asked? No, you know, I'm pretty chuffed with my life so far.

But there's not, you'd want to squeeze in, like, tennis or? No. I wouldn't mind, like, working out a bit, but then I'm also, like, if I really wanted to work out, I'll go work out. I don't really want to, because I'm not doing it. Do you not want to paint something? I'm already an artist. Yeah, totally.

so are we but I'd love one day to just paint something and I'd everyone be like that's fucking sick no I'd rather spend my time like working really yeah

there's just nothing else you want to do I like to like move towards a goal like painting just feels like so what's the goal? The goal of like being more successful and being better at my job and stuff like that but what's more successful

than where you are now it feels like you're pretty name peak no I don't think so who's the peak of your world then there's no one like I always think of myself as like I want to be the best version of myself. I don't think.

Oh, so it's you versus you. Pardon? It's you versus you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think you should ever really like look up as well, especially not in the porn industry. So how'd you kick on? Then what's next?

What's the next part? What's the next goal where you're like, do you know what, that's better? What's Lily Phillips doing in 2027? That makes 2025 look like a fucking lazy little shy way, gobshite. I'm currently manifesting. I'm a celebrity, like doing something in TV,

rather like Big Brother. I'm a celebrity would be an absolute bag, but I don't think I'm quite yet there, yeah. Would that be a big jump for them to sort of take that risk? Oh, huge. I don't think they've ever had many controversial. Katie Price was a glamour model when she went on. Which is kind of like the only fans of her time.

And then there's been politics, which are fairly controversial. Do you think you'd be able to take the heat on your shoulders? If you've got ITV, so many people would kick off. Oh, but like I have everyone kick off in my life. No, but I'm saying, I think, this would be to like a national media level of like, why is this person doing the. Yeah, but that'd be a great PR though, wouldn't it? That'd be fucking classic.

It's great, but like whether you can take that on your shoulders? 100%. I've never really been that asked that much about people saying shit. Well, just to finish a reality show and that was like, I didn't really care about the comments of that either. Even though I won't ever watch anything back that I do. Like, this won't be game watched by me. I hope someone watches it.

Do you watch your scenes back? If I'm editing him, yeah. You don't edit in? Pardon? You do you own editing? Yeah. Well, to be fair, now I've kind of passed it on a little bit, but most of the stuff of like editing and things like that.

Say that you don't watch anything you're in, really. No. Hate it. It's on my own voice. Part from if you're editing. And then something's really gone wrong. Then we're all sicky, sicky,

so many people have to have food points. Do you guys edit or no? I mean, we did a bit. As the company, as the pot has got older. It's like, why not give the job, on so I have more time to do the most important stuff. We've weaponised autism as Finn Taylor wonderfully said. What's the reaction like

because you're very like recognisable in the street. What's the like average reaction of someone? Because I imagine you walk in through Liverpool people are either doing a double take or looking. Do people come over or do you see people kind of be hesitant to come over to? Rather a double take or people will come over and they're usually really nice. I've never had one person be rude or anything like that.

Not even again because Phil Fawson's girlfriend wasn't a fan of you. Oh no. She told you to fuck off. Yeah. Phil Foden's girlfriend told you to fuck off. She shooed me away with a hand before I'd even finished to begin. And bear in mind, like, I was just going over there to be like, hi, can I get a photo so I can put it in my buddy family group chat

to show my dad and my brother. Are they city fans? Pardon? They're they just like football. He's played for England, hasn't he? Yeah. He's quite a successful, famous footballer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But Lily went over to approach him and she just goes, fuck off. like go away. But it was, the thing is as well, like, I've been up to like much bigger celebrity is. And like if someone doesn't want to take a photo with me, that's so fine. I think there's just like a way to say it. Like I'm sure if someone comes to ask for a photo

with you guys like, so nice there for a charm. We take Phil Foden's Mrs Willer, she's hard dormant. So how did you react to that? Because you're back to the camera so you can't really see what your reaction is. Oh, I just said, no worries, have a good day. And did she smile or was she like, No, no, no, no.

She didn't smell the whole night, though. Do you think she's a bit suspicious that it's for some sort, don't take this the wrong way, but for like some sort of publicity stunt? Yeah, that's fine. But like if you take a photo, a public photo with someone at a boxing match, like, it's bound. Oh, was it out of boxing match? Yeah, yeah. You weren't just like buyers.

No, no, no. Yes, they were ringside. We were like both ringside. Yeah. Ah. What was the fight? But he was getting photos with the people and stuff like that, so I thought, oh, it might be like. What fight was there?

It was misfits. It was Tommy Fury, Ed. Eddie Hall. Yeah, yeah. Like two weeks ago. Sorry. The big one. Tommy Fury for Eddie Hall.

Man Mountain Eddie Hall. Yeah. Who couldn't really box. Yeah. I'm not calling him out, by the way. But he couldn't really box. Wow. I would like to watch that.

Big boy. Who's the selfie that you'd love to have? Of all the celebrities you could get, who's the one that would get you the most hyped? It's no one that I really... Sorry, I sound like actually the most boring human ever. I think a lot of people of your generation don't really care about. No.

Because Julia up there's the same. And she's like, there's no one who really I give a fuck about. No. I've met like some of the big celebrities that like I've looked up to. And they were like really nice. I didn't get like a phone with them or anything. It does sound if we take everything you're saying,

it's face value that you literally go to work and fuck. Come home. Let your boyfriend fuck you. And then go on your phone and then go to sleep and start again. That is pretty much it. Do you ever make a roast dinner? No, I don't. cook. Sorry, I have no hobbies. I genuinely do nothing. Other than obviously, like, we have,

I have, like, meetings with all my staff and I've run a business, essentially, so I'm so busy doing that. Like, I'll get into bed at, like, 8pm and that's when I can have, like, my, like, scrolling time or whatever, but all days you spend, like, I don't know, chatting to, like, my assistant on what we're doing next and things like that. Do you don't even have, like, Sundays off or anything like that? No, this Sunday I've got a threesome. And them. So no,

I've got a threesome in London. Yeah, same, but I'm going to have a roast as well. Why have you got, is it like a special threesome? Surely a threesome to you is like... No, not special. Rucky numbers now? No, every other day.

Just a three-sum. There was just a girl in town but I don't really shoot girl much. So I was like, can I just bring a boy? Because it doesn't... Can be made cumming sound? Is the male porn stars that are like...

When you get offered work, you're like, no, he's a, he's a bad cunt that one. I'm not working with him. There are some people who are like sworn out the industry, like blacklisted, because rather because they fake their tests or something or another, if you heard like something bad happened during a scene. But there's not, like people just don't work with them. Yeah. They're not the guys who are really big or anything like that.

So they're all pretty sound and they've got a good reputation. Yeah, yeah, they've got to be because they've been in it 20 years. All right. And then you've got, it's almost like us putting on a, like Adam Rowan friends or Dan Nightingale and friends. You've got people in the industry that you're like, I trust him, I like him. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, I don't work with many English guys because it's shit. Disgraceful. I'm sure good to stay hard, like, or come too quickly. That really, that hit too hard on. Yeah, we get excited. We're happy to be there. Have you got a favorite, Willie? It's got to be like J-Mack.

Yeah, Google that. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, you look like you have to Google J-Mach. Danny D is pretty good Maybe I'll know him But I don't know his name You'll know his cock I might know his face in his cock

Let's see Or Danny D I like him I know him Danny D looks like he was in Holly Oaks at one point It's too big that for me I know that's insane

Is it too big for you It's not that big Sorry It's not that big for me Like I can take it Alright Yeah But I'm like

That's too big That brother I want to be able to connect With the guy And I'm like That's not me Oh you want to be able to relate.

Yeah. Yeah. That ain't, that ain't me. That ain't knowing. J-Mack's got not, not too long. Who's J-Mach?

I don't know. It's coming up with a... Tying porn? I did. J-M-A-Porn. Porn star. But there's like lots of different ones. Is he a black gentleman?

No. Okay, there's a big black willy on the screen there. J-M-A-C. Ah, okay. Sorry, I think you're writing J. Oh, he looks a bit like Dan. He's like Dan, but a bit fatter. Hello.

How proud of you? Like someone looks like you but than a bit fatter. A few years ago it had a been he looks like Dan, but he's slimmer. That is a bendy, willie. Is it? Yeah. Yeah. I don't remember.

It's one of them proper. It's like a Beckham. Yeah. I find it very unsatisfying those curve, Willys. No, this is to the side. Oh, no. What we do? Do you find it unsatisfy?

I will not watch porn with a bendy dick guy in it. Really? Oh, I want a good dick. I don't, the ones where, the worst one's the ones where it's sort of like, like a... He's diving. Like, Moes over. Oh, I hate it. What are doing?

The little outside of the foot ones that go a bit up. Don't mind that. No. Don't mind that. Is that because it's similar to yours? I'll do they the best? Yeah. Because they can push the button, can't be better?

Yeah. Like sugar babes. And as a circumcised, man, do not enjoy an uncircumcised willy in porn. Well, I'm uncircumstised. Like, it's hard to, you'd have to specifically look for uncircised. Most of them have had it that I cut off, haven't they?

I've never put the Boolean operator, I've never put that in the search bar. Yeah. I don't care. Question, when you guys are watching porn, are you watching pretending it's you or are you watching two people have sex? I'm watching it imagining it's me,

not pretending it to me, but I'm going, oh, I, that's for me, that. Yeah, yeah, I'm the fella, don't it? Right, right, right. And, like, I have... So the massive black buff guy, you're like, yeah, that's me. I can't, like, I know this is probably racist. I can't watch black porn because I can't imagine it to me.

No, I can understand that. You know what I mean? But you're all that with films as well, aren't you? And with films with everything. You can't watch black porn? films. Bad boy's too. Oh, this is awesome. No, I'm the captain in

that. I don't know what you mean? You want to be like the lead. And if I watch cook porn, I'm the guy welly and her. Oh, okay. I'm looking at him in the corner going you fucking gimp. Do you know what I mean? Like I'm the one doing the thing. Would you have a cook in the room? Would you have a cook in the room? I cook myself. Whoa!

I got it. Deserted it. You said your fire. Your current boyfriend is a cook. Yeah. Did you, was that a pre-record? Did you want that? No, he just kind of fell into the role, to be honest. Like, he would watch my porn. I imagine he did, yeah.

He would watch my porn and have a whack. And I was like, oh, I'm doing like a shoot house. I'm going to Barcelona to fuck all these guys in Barcelona. Do you want to come? I'd say that'd upset me that if my wife said that. No, no. No, well, it's my job. They weren't even mates at the time.

Right. Because if my wife came around, I'm going to Barcelona to fuck all these men, and I'd be like, oh. Yeah. I was so kind to invite him that. That is lovely. Yeah. And then he met all the guys and stuff like that.

And he just sat there and watched. So then he... Do they care about that? No, they don't care. There's like 10 people sat around watching because it's a shoot house. There's so many porn stars in one house that like usually a lot of people are just

sat there watching. Doing a deadie. You can't say a porn star if you're bothered about that, can you? That's the whole thing. I mean, your partner works in a... special needs school. So if she said she was going to Barcelona

to get wellied by 10 men, it would be really out of pocket. I'd be fucking gorted. Really? I'd have to divorce. What about just a blowbag? She don't go in at a just like... As a layman, what a blow,

Connor? Pardon? She gets a blowback when she goes, like, out with her mates in the morning, like a curly blowbanger. No, like a blowback, like you blow everyone and then just

be khaki on you. I just wouldn't want her to do that. No. But, like, she just washed it off. That's not the issue. Genuine real question. Genuine real question. The fact that that would,

we'd not be happy with that. Do you think that's crazy? No, no, no. I think that's so normal. If I went home to my wife now and said, tomorrow I'm going to go and do a blowbang and I said to what it was and she went, don't do that.

I'd have to go, okay. But it's the only reason you wouldn't. He'd love to, I think. So a blow bang is, what is a blow? Is it just blow jobs and banging? Like, like, there's no banging. See, I did one in bosses, like 10 guys. Just blow job them all, blow bang,

trying to fit as many in your mouth as possible, and then they just come all on you. Right. So it's not really like anything to. Isn't that otherwise known as a Bukaki party? A Backei, yes. It's basically just like you're just kissing their cock. Like, it's just a kiss, but on their cock.

So like, it's like you're kissing some on, but just. Yeah, but I've been to weddings, man. I'm not like, I kiss people at weddings. I'm not kissing them on the cock. No, you really not. A difference between cock and lips, though, at this point. Lily. Yeah.

Lily, come on. What are you talking about? I do make me cock sing sometimes in the shower. Ring my bell. You know, a little, like, I make it look like a little mouth and I'm like, are you not worried you're going to drown it? What? Opening the whole of it.

Guantanamo Bay in your own dick. Okay, so what happens if you got to your partner today? And he was like, oh, I've gone and done a blow bang with. three guys and would that bother you go on the other way? It's a little bit different aspects because it's not for work. So he's just doing it up your pleasure. But I like, I mean, sure why not. What have you got 20 quid for it?

Yeah, okay, fine, yeah. Everyone's got to start somewhere. He's an open spot. Yeah, it's bringing the bread home. How long have you been together? Four months. And has there been any arguments to do with your work? No.

Not at all. He loves, I think he actually loves it. Like, it's a bit of a. I think it is. So it works really well, to be honest, because I need someone like that. He was enthusiastic about it. Couldn't have, like, a boring sard

to be like, don't go have a blame mind. Yeah, like, you can't. We wouldn't be compatible with. What happens if he was like, I support it, but I'm just, you know,

you stay over there and I'll, you know, I'll be in my lane doing my show. I think that's fair enough. I did 100% accept that. Someone, like, wouldn't nag me about it. I just want to get on with it.

I don't know if that's just me being really selfish and just being like, I want to do everything I want to do but have a boyfriend on top of that. But it's also like it's a job. Well, if they're up for it, then why not? Yeah, but this is something you've been doing a while. So you can't meet, if you meet someone, they can't be like, well, I don't want you to do that.

Yeah, because I'm, fuck you. I'm doing it. All I'm good for. Bit different if you're in a relationship and then someone goes, tell you what I want to do for that Barcelona. Yeah. The Barcelona boys.

Yeah. Is this your first relationship since starting doing all this? Yeah. Yeah, so it's so different. That's not. Can I ask a question about, like, the, the, the big stunts you've done, where there's been, like, three and, was it four figures of, was it? Yeah. Yeah.

So when that happens, I understand, like, the sort of headline and, like, how good that is for profile building and making Lily Phillips, Lily Phillips, like, she's done this huge stunt. Was there anyone who walked in at any point where you were like, like, like, not, no, not you. No, but it does get stinky. Like, things get smelly. But there was no one where I was like, no, not you.

I think that that would be a real hit to the self-esteem. If one of you guys walked in, I went, no, not him. We're all English. We're all English as well, so we wouldn't last long. That's ideal though in the situation, isn't it? Yeah, it's absolutely ideal. Oh yeah, you want them gone? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

In and out. It is another. question, right? And I'm not asking this for any other reason other than intrigue, right? We've all met now, done the pod, we're friends, right? You do another one of them, you're going for 2,000 in a day. Yeah. Right?

How are you sorting parking? That's so real. It was in London, people got the tube. What happens if one of us walking, like someone you know, someone you've worked with on a non, let's say Finn walks in? And he's like, I'm next, I'm number 12. Yeah. My voice.

He put another voice. Hello. Hello. Is that fine? Yeah, it's more than welcome. As long as it's not a family member. That's the only line. Or it's game.

Yeah. Whatever's like an ex-boyfriend? Yeah. I would say it from, unless it made my boyfriend uncomfortable. He's got a mad line him. Pardon?

If that's his line. Yeah, yeah. It's a strange one. I see my ex-girlfriend in the street earlier and looked the other way. But it's like I've already had sex tunes So it may as well have sex a gang What's your next goal then?

What's your next like? I'm doing, I've made like a custom glory hole. So then actually anyone could show up to that. Aren't they all custom? No, because this one's got like, none of them are like factory bills,

are they? No, you can get like ones off like Amazon. But this one's got like, my name in it, my brand colours, things like that. And where are you putting it?

In like a warehouse somewhere, I think. I don't, random you have to pardon it's not going to be like in like a toilet like a George Michael kind of style no no it's going to be like a you could we get it in your toilet actually um I think when you leave that old if it ever gets used after that it's going to be weird quite a male dominated office you could do it somewhere like rarely public like unexpected like marks and

spencers or something right that could work I don't know if you wouldn't get like arrested for that but you could but like they'd have to look into the toilet to see what you're doing. And then that's the crime. Oh, you mean, at the toilet's amount of Spencer thing. Yeah, not like in the bread aisle. This isn't just any old glory hall. So what's the goal with the glorial?

Because Gloria has been done before. What's the... No, but it's just like something new and different I haven't done. So have you got like a, is it like a stint, like a 12 hour stint? Is it like a... Yeah, I'll probably be there for like quite a few hours. But it's just kind of, it's to be fair.

It's good for like social media videos. Because obviously, everyone knows, knows what it is, but it won't get taken down by Instagram. Won't it? That wouldn't get taken down with? Obviously, I'm not putting sucking cock on my Instagram. Oh. But as in the...

As it, like, you know what it is. You can sell it and then go on. Like, if I'm making, like, before videos with it in the shop, people know what you're doing. What I'm doing. Does that make sense? It's good for socials. Josh, get a glory hole.

Last time we spoke, you said you learned not to be a skydivers, so you could do a skydive blow job. I really want to do that. I'm just, I'm shit scared to fall out of playing on my own. Yeah, but you'd learn though. They'd teach you off to do it. I know, but can I not get someone on my back? Oh, you want someone on your back?

Yeah. Because I've got a porn saw that I know who's got his skydiving license. I'd love to do a scene where we skydive. But I couldn't go on my own. Wait, so you could do that. So what you're, all you need is a skydiver who's game enough to be on your back while you're sucking someone off. Yeah. So I could ask my boyfriend at this right.

Is you a skydiver? Is he a skydiver? No. Don't ask him. You'd both die. He'd love to just be there though. He could be like flying next year. Like, ooh.

He could be on the other fellas back. That's like the ultimate cut thing. A cook scene in a skydye that I'd been saying. That'd be class. Good for him, mum. Yeah. A break down. Yeah.

I break down. We are, but we're going to do some advice. You can't have. the jingle, but I'm playing a jingle. Nice. Jingle, jingle. It's shit when we do the jingles and the gas cotter here. Does my head in. It's just to... We get a speaker.

Lee Jameson says, Wagwag, boys, I need some advice. I've recently got into a relationship and I'm mad about this girl. It's still fairly new, so I'm only just now regularly staying over at hers. The problem is she's got this horrible fat, long-haired pug called Zeus that is absolutely adamant,

that she is absolutely adamant, must sleep in the same bed as her. I go over, I go over thinking we get to cuddle and maybe have a good time, and instead I'm pushed to the edge of the bed by this little gos-eyed freak and kept up all night by his wheezing. I rolled over the other night

and it was like I was spooning Chewbacca. How do I get this cot-blocking mutt out of our bed permanently? You've got enticing with some treats, making me friends. While he's trying to goose this, girl. Yeah, probably like chuck some treats out. So our dog spends a lot of time on our bed.

Mine too. Not but the sleepy times. Yeah. So when we... We have to, you know, we want some time together. We have to, you know, ex-spell. We've got a cat as well. Do you?

I just make a pillow wall with something like... You have to X what? Do you say expelli Armisen? Yeah. No, we have to be like... Joe, when you're trying to be spontaneous. Yeah. And like, it's not like planned.

And like, you'll be like, you know what's happening. You know, you have to be like, I think the dog should go downstairs now. Yeah, that's too on the nose. Yeah, but it kind of ruins the vibe then. As long as you're not making eye contact with it, you're fine. The dog is not. not staying on the bed while we're having sex.

Oh, I've had sex with the dog on the bed. I couldn't look at him in the, poor lad. Hang on, haven't you both got small dogs? You can't have tiny dogs in the bed when you're sleeping. Why? If you roll over and fucking lie on it, you won't. No. One, you don't, and two, he's not a fucking, like, a yoghurt.

No, he's, you know what? I'm not going to argue there. He just move out of the way. He's not a yoghut. What do you guys think? So, I've got a rottweiler. Yeah. That you've met.

Does he sleep in a cage? He sleeps in his crate, yeah. But they have sex in a cage. That's where it gets. Get out of his bed. Yeah, it's really tricky. I've got a sausage dog who sleeps on the bed. Yeah.

But he's tiny. But if we get into me, he has to go. He's not staying. No way. Really? Yeah. Like, it was a concern of mine. Like, the sexy, sexy bum times

when we were getting him, like, is he going to interrupt this a lot? And I thought for a while he was going to be in the crate upstairs. I thought he was going to have to sleep at us. we got dead lucky with him. Night one, I stayed downstairs with him. He was in his crate. I stayed on the couch.

He didn't whimper or anything once. I woke up twice, took him for the way, put him back in, he was fine. Second night onwards, I just went and slept upstairs. He's been fine. He loves his crate. It's where he wants to go to sleep.

He's very sex positive dog, which is great. I think he's just one of the boys. I think he looks at me sometimes. He's going wallop me in my mouth. Why doesn't the listener just run to a different bedroom? If you've got another bedroom, just run there and the dog hopefully won't follow you.

Maybe on his own. Who would? Well, he's just met this girl. She's got an ugly dog. The dog is everywhere, in the bed, all over the shot. But like, go to another bedroom as you're about to have sex, something like that. You're really that desperate.

Does it matter that the dog's ugly, or is that just the... I think it makes it worse. Yeah. A pug's the ones that are like, they can't breathe, yeah. I've also never heard of a long-air pug. It sounds disgusting. Sounds ugly. Hadn't they've got really good personality's pugs, though?

Really? Yeah, apparently... And you're a personality man, aren't you? If you're a dog, what dog would you be? People say I look like the Rottweiler. You turn and you look like your dog. That is just... I couldn't agree more.

Like, Jack looks like petty. Yeah. I think I look a bit like him and you do look like... I look like a blend. Oh, dog looks like me and my partner, like brown and blonde together. You do look like... Yeah. It's called mine a scraggly little tramp, so great.

I'm a poodle, I think. I don't mouth. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Poodle energy. Poodle's are really intelligent, though. Hang on. What?

Pudels are rarely intelligent, like, really intelligent. I really didn't enjoy it. Like Stephen Frypey, poodle. I think you're more of a pit bull. Really? I thought that's laparacts. Pipple? Carl, I really didn't enjoy that.

No, you're not, you're not intelligent. Carl, Carl. Pipple? Oh, because you look like Pipple the singer. I'm seeing Pipple on something. Everything about me screams, pit bull. I do a legal fighter. I do a legal fighter. Love football.

Just what I'm into. I'd be a beagle me. Why? Would you? No, the cool I'd be. You fucking wouldn't. Gorgie. Beagles can't be left on their own or they scream.

You want to be left on your own or more you scream. I'm the opposite of my people. I love being on my own. That's me. Boxing it's straight. I'm great. Yes, like, I'm sorry. There's no one better to spend time with them myself.

Exactly. Yeah. How are I? Watch a bit of TikTok. But the best thing to do is when your partner is the same as that, when they love their, company and you love being, you can go, hang on, and you're going to go on that room for three hours.

Yeah, you're going to be made up here. Yeah. And then life's good. That's what you need. You need a fella to be able to be okay on us own. Yeah. Couldn't agree more. If you met someone, you really like them,

and they had a dog that you found upsettingly ugly, breathe weird, smell, would that be enough to fuck off the relationship? It depends whether the dog likes me. Depends how old the dog is. So like how long they're going to die in? Is it worth it?

Should I, like, put my investment in now? The dog will be dead in a couple of years, so, like, it pays off, or am I calling it quits? Or you can start putting my garlic in his dinner, just little bits. You ate garlic. Poisonous to dogs. Is it? Oh, is it?

Or grapes? I thought you were just trying to give an already ugly dog bad breath. No, dog made end up on dog made. Is garlic? Dogs are allergic to garlic? Garlic is not allergic to dogs. Garlic would be absolutely fine around dogs. Yeah, dogs.

can't have garlic, they can't have very dark chocolate, they can't have onion. Grapes. Even on a sally. No sara. Cider? No cider. Don't give your dog any alcohol. Bars. Yeah. He likes a Guinness, mine like. Not as much as Perry does, but...

Yeah. If I've got a pint of Guinness, he just wants it. I know my dog loves the bag. She loves the bag. Does she get on the chairs, yeah? Wow! What does she want? She's how skinny. Yeah, she's tiny. She's like really tiny.

Is that before a dog walk? You go and do like 12 miles. When I'm like getting on it, she's sniffing around it. I'm like, love. Wow. She's like a mother. So why did you get a dog? I just want to get on the shite with me.

We've got another one from an anonymous lady. Says, hi lids. Anonymous please as my partner listens. I need some advice. So full disclosure, I'm partial to a bit of spanking. Nothing too aggressive, but I like a smack on the ass during sex. The problem is my lovely boyfriend, doesn't have the hand-eye coordination for it.

I tried to get him to do it in the bedroom, but he never seems to connect properly, like it's either in the wrong place or not firm enough, and it kills the mood. I'm scared to speak to him about it in case I embarrass him. And you are the closest thing I've got to mailmates to us. So would you be okay with getting a spanking tutorial from your misses, or should I just avoid the uncomfortable conversation?

Wow. Yeah, a spanking tutorial could be quite hot. like make it into a sexy thing, you know. The first one you miss, Joe, when you're kind of like parmy by accident. Yeah, yeah. And then you get the second one. And if you're nail the second one,

life's good. Yeah. If you miss the second one. It's like a connection. Like, you can't try for a third. Is that what you know? You do not try the thing.

It's like, at that point, you're just hitting someone. Do I mean? You keep missing. You want the really loud, audible. Yeah, like a real connection

where it's like a whip back. Yeah, once the sound big. Yeah. I mean, what are you guys doing? I've got an ego. So if a girl was like to me,

hey, just so you know, your shit had spanking and here's how you do it. And it was that on the nose, I'd be like, listen, love, off your fuck. I'm not listening to you. Oh, really? Yeah, you haven't even spanked me. So your missus has never told you you about anything?

If she has, he hasn't heard it. Um, she's sort of told me to slow down a couple of times. Right. She's like a little bit slower. Yeah. And I'd be like, all right. Yeah. And you need to, like, constructive criticism then.

It can't be like. I don't mind him. You're making me come too much. All right. Like, I'll take a bit of guidance. But I'm not taking a fucking lecture. Of someone who's never smacked an ass and a light. That's what he needs is guidance, not a lecture.

Also, if she doesn't class, that would be sexy, wouldn't it? Yeah. If she goes, this is all you're meant to do here. She does a class for other people? No, no, no. If she goes off, she's like, right, I want you to learn properly. And she's, you know, that's sexy, in her? .

Surely? That's sexy, surely? I think maybe just when he waxes you just go a bit to the left down like he's trying to get him to it's like he's doing his left and right as he's like in doggy and he's like oh which way's up which way's down

you know it's too confusing if you do that little lesson beforehand and you get it right that's what I'd be doing your left all right I go ah fuck do you know that confuses me more because sometimes I look at that

and I can't remember which way around an elbow Left's just over there. Yeah, that's left. But I look at that sometimes and go, fucking hell, that's the hell, isn't it? Yeah, left's over there. Look, you've just got a, like, sweet talk I'm into it.

Would you be into, um, would you be into switching, like, pegging? Would you be into, like, you be in the mind? No. Not at all. No. You don't, or even have your partner went, listen. You know, I'm... No.

Wow, just straight, no. You know, I have, like, foundries that, like, were... With your boyfriend? The spionage? Yeah, no, no, I'm not doing peg in. There's loads of women who won't peg the... Not the... Hang on.

Some of them just won't. Even though you've bought the equipment and you've asked me out. No, but that is a pretty normal line for a lot. Not every lady wants to bum their fella. I'm also, like, really scared of, like, kind of getting shot on a bit. Like, that would, like, really, like, turn me off at me.

Make him douche? Or is that an ick? The idea of him cleaning his ass out. I think that's a bit of an ick. Yeah. Yeah, the idea of him starting a bath, cleaning his ass off. so allowed to prepare for the bullet.

I mean, you can do what you like, but like it's not something I'd want to do with my partner. Yeah. No, I get it. We've got a kinkbox. A kink box. A kink box?

Me and my wife. What's that? It's like, with a few outfits and stuff. A couple, yeah. How often do you get the kinkbox out? The problem is, I've got a nine-year-old and a five-year-old

and we were worried about them rummaging around the room. You two just keep talking. I've just got a text, Carlson. I know what you text to me. You don't need to. So, we've had to, we've had to, put it in the loft.

And it, just because I feel like that's the safest place for it. Yeah. But it's really, it's a real... It's a real... It's a real... When you have to go in the loft to do something kinky. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, we thought this. Was that are you getting pegged tonight? No, no, no, no. It's just for me and him. Just me and it. Sometimes, you know... You can't do that. That's so... No, you absolutely can't do that. I like him more than the rest of them. What was that?

It was a joke. that is not safe for YouTube. Can you just do them together later? Yeah, you could have just set it in each other, mid-fucking podcast. Most of the time I would, most of the time I would, I'd walk home with them later,

and I'd be like, hey, you remember earlier? But I just had to, you know, I just had to make sure. It was funny. So what's in the kinkbox then? It's mainly stuff that Stey's got as the business manager from Love Honey.

Oh, right. What do you think it was in? They're like pictures of stay or something? Yeah, it's pictures of stay. I just keep asking for pictures to stay. So what you do then? When Laura's like, I want to do something kinky, I'll go and get wolfed out of the loft.

So I'm gone, when Laura, when you're both in the mood, and Laura goes, it's time for the kinky one, do you have to put shoes on and get in the loft? I can go in the loft without shoes. That's rogue for me. At least slitters. Oh, by the way, it's not in the fucking corner of the loft. It's just, it's handy.

It's just to, you know, you get your head up there. Is it by the Christmas decoration? You have to see the Christmas decoration. So you have to, because you're trying to get in the kinky mood. you can't be like, oh shit, we need a tip run soon because it really breaks you out of them. You don't want to get that mixed up, do you? You don't want to get that mixed up

and in the dark put a bubble up your wife's ass. Or put a dildo on the tree. Kids would be gutted. Or a picture of Stee Wolford. He's my fairy. No, I'm gone, so she goes, it's Kinky Night. You go and get the... She always says that.

That's how she says it. Now what I'm saying, do you choose from the box? Or do you bring the box down? Oh, the box comes down. How big this box? It's not a very big box. We're not super kinky. Right.

Similar size to her box. Like, just like, no, it's not the same size as a vagina. Well, I'm glad I shared that. Anal beads? Anal beads? Yeah, what's like the kinkiest thing in there? I've got to know. What's the kinkiest thing in there?

In the box. In the kink box? The pegged equipment that she won't use. You bought that? No, it's just been silly. I'm sure my wife who's definitely watched this is really enjoying this part of the show. Sorry.

Hi, babe. You're all right. I'm fucking bumming, will you? I got a question. I've just got a question from Carl. Anal Beats. They're quite kinky for me. To put up your ass.

Either? I think anal beads are, you know, a step on. It's long enough. They can go up both and you can both watch whatever you want on different tabs. Can join them.

Yeah. It's like a dirty lady in the Trump. One more. One more bit of advice. who, Jack says, Wag Wagg Lids, my wife has decided to start her own only fans, but she's made it free to join.

I've said to her, you should charge people to join. She's doing it for the love of the game. But she agreed, she disagrees and said she can get more people this way and then can sell content afterwards. Am I in the wrong here for thinking if people are going to be cracking one out over her,

they should at least be paying. What's your advice here? What I'd say to him is, people are already cracking one out over her. Yeah, so real. Like, if she's got an Instagram. She's doing it intentionally now. Yeah.

And people intentionally. I think it's just marketing. It's market in 101, you know? The drug dealer tactic, in it? Is that a good tactic? The free pages do work. People do make a lot of money from the free pages, but I can understand his confusion of like,

what you're doing it for free love. How much is it to see your page, basically? At 999. And then you charge. Like extra on top of that for any videos and stuff like that. But people do like free pages and then charge loads, not really put anything on the actual free page. for you page, but then they'll charge loads for their actual videos.

So for the tenet on your page, is there just hours of... There's like six years of photos of me. Like, I think there's like 5,000 photos on there or something or another. You can get it all for free and like 300 videos, but like the real shit is like in the DMs if you want that. So she's actually quite smart. By the way, Jack sounds pretty sound with this. He's not going...

Yeah. He's not kicking off about the only fans account. He wants to watch. Yeah. He just wants to take some money from it, yeah. I do get that. I think that's... I think a lot of men obviously are just like,

nah, my missus can't do that. Which I also understand that I'm sort of, that's where I land. I know that's probably an insecurity or whatever. It's just who I am. But I do understand. I think most men are... She thinks she's going to make money from this anyway,

maybe she will. But I think most men are like, hey, if, you know, men all around the world are going to be able to see the inside of your vagina, at least let's make a few quid. If he do... If she wants to... to be more discreet about it.

Like, not all his mate. I mean, his mates will all see anyway. But if she wants to be more discreet, she's got to do a paywall. Yeah. Like, because then anyone is seen it. Everyone. And it's probably like getting sent around so much more and stuff like that. If you make people pay, at least it paid. Is there anybody

say your boyfriend now is like, I love what you do? Is there anything he could say that would make you like pull it back a little bit? But like he's like, I love this, but like that's a bit too far. Other than family members, is there anyone that you're bothered us seeing stuff? No.

Is there anyone you're just like, oh, that cunk can see her? No. So if you went like that stunts too much for me, do you mind? You know, if we had a child and we did like, because we've spoken about this,

like I wouldn't do anything pregnant. Yeah, that's... Yeah, because that's our child in the video kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah. Does that make sense? Yeah.

You got a responsibility there. Yeah, to be a good parent. Mm. We know we're talking about. No. No, no, no, no. We genuinely had the conversation. I was like, no, I think you're right.

Okay, so what happens if you have a child with your now boyfriend? Yeah. Get married, whatever. And he goes, can you slow it down a little bit now? We have got to stop it. I think everyone's got to make sacrifices when they have kids. Yeah, I've got to go in the loft. Yeah.

You know, paternity leave and stuff like that. But I don't know, not slow it down, not like, can you do less of the stunts or anything like that? I don't be like, whoa. You go on your high horse about. this. Yeah. And I'm not saying he's not trying to push you down. He's just like, right now we are building a life together.

And obviously financially you can help that. Yeah. If he was like, now we've got, can we just focus more on having... I think that'd be fair enough. Yeah. Yeah. Would you do it though?

When I'm ready to be a mother, yeah, because I think you need to be responsible and be there for your child and, like, be a big part of their childhood. Why's kids feel neglected? Yeah. Do you feel like you'd have to stop if you had a baby?

No. Not just to give a, them your time at least because you say you're so busy i know but you can still i can still work like well then you can run a marathon and have kids pardon but then you can run another marathon if you've got time to raise a kid mate you can run the london marathon i couldn't have a kid now i'd have to slow down with work yeah but you can still work so you get to your 30s like when late 30 and you're like right it's time would you be like i'm gonna stop not you know what i mean like i think calm wants you to stop no what i mean what's like what's the what's the what's the what's the catalyst in your life that would

me, Hugo, my life is now about this. There's not really anything. Because obviously my boyfriend's all about it. What would you do? Or rather directing in the industry. I'd love to be like a director. If you couldn't work in the sex industry at all. Marketing. Don't. Yeah. And you'd be good at it because you've got a business and you know how to do it. Yeah, like I've been on social media for so long. You do pick up on all the tricks on how to

be successful on social media. Like if I could, if I could take like, one person and not necessarily make them a only fan star but if i had to make them social media famous i could have you seen euphoria yes this season yeah yeah that's kind of a plot yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you know you guys probably have the same like you get so much knowledge from doing the job that then you could i can make anyone like big on social media yeah sorry that sounds so up my and ass i go the knowledge but you've done it so you could just help someone else yeah yeah yeah i think i could going to recruitment.

Yeah. Like, what do you want to do for work? You know, to flip on. What do you do? Fucking knobbed. And then you ring the people for it. Sorry, what was that? Oh, you fucking...

I'd struggle to get out of the habit. You know what I mean? Right, right. What do you want to do? Bullshit. Just honest recruitment. I doubt it. What did you guys do before this?

I used to be in the circus. No, sure. He was only young, though. Like, as an, not as an adult. My dad was a circus master and I was going to, like, take over from him, but... So you're the circus junior?

Essentially. Yeah. That's young, though. But his dad knew everything about the circus and he knew he could pass on all that knowledge. And it just wasn't for me. I just don't believe that elephants should be forced to do that. Oh, that's fair enough.

So what actual job did you do? Did you get paid off? I started stand up when I was 18. No way. You used me circus money to just like support me for a while. You were to bar them there for a bit? Yeah. Essentially still a circus act.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, totally. Yeah. I just didn't, you know, I didn't want to be under that. big top forever. On the what?

The big top, the circus. Is that what they're called? It's a big top. That wasn't a porn thing. Yeah. It wasn't getting bummed by a big game. None of us have had real jobs really, have we? Bartending.

I was a teacher. I was in a call centre for a week, but then it turned out they bought all the data illegally, so it got shut down. So you've not had that much actual kind of experience being in the real world. No. And it shows.

Yeah. It feels like if we did, though, it might be worse. We might be worse at our jobs. Yeah, the real world also doesn't seem as fun as the world we've managed to create ourselves. Oh, no, it's so. Yeah. What did you do? I've done like everything.

I used to be a cleaner, waitress. I worked at Tesco, Sock and Charles, TGRI Fridays, a receptionist. How old are there? I'm 24. That's a lot of jobs. Because you've been doing this for like four or five years. I did the jobs from 16 to... What was your last?

job before you went professional at this? I was a receptionist. And you went, fuck this. Oh, it was so awful. I'm going to go. No, I think I was working at Tescos or something like. No, because it was COVID. Lost my job as a receptionist.

Then join Tesco's because nowhere else was hiring. It was shit. I was having to be like, right, one meter, counting the people inside and stuff. Oh, we're just a doorman. And especially when the real was six meters. No wonder you lost that job. Spread an event.

And then you knew you'd make loads of money off only fans or was that like a leap? No, I did. didn't even think you, it was such a platform where I didn't even think you could make money on it. It was such like, a anomaly. And then I was like, shit. When did you start on it? Six years ago.

So in COVID life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you go in blind? Did you have friends, isn't it? Just blind. I knew a girl, but she wasn't like a friend, friends. I can't really ask you. And then I just, I don't know.

I'd already built up a social media following. Because I'd, like, worked from about 16 on Instagram, like posting photos of myself. I'd like ordering clothes from somewhere online and then just take photos in them, send them back and do shit like that. And so I built up a follow in already before I even joined only fans. So they were waiting for you to do that anywhere?

Yeah, yeah. So when I first started, I made quite a bit of money already. Yeah. Six years ago, it's when we started our Patreon. Nice. Yeah. And we didn't really know what we were doing. I don't think we thought we'd make loads of money from it.

I feel like as well podcasted, it wasn't a thing years ago, you know. There was a load less of them. Yeah. Yeah, now everyone's popping out a podcast from their ass. That's how it feels. Yeah. Would you do a podcast?

Can't be asked. Yeah, yeah, if I could do it in bed. You could? That'd be a selling point. Yeah, yeah. While you fellas, you know. Yeah. Watching.

Yeah. That'd be a pretty strong selling point, wasn't it? I think podcasts, they take so long. The clips do really well from podcasts. The actual podcast. doesn't do that well. So I only ever do clips of podcasts. So I have a, like, I had Taylor Ryan on in my house

because I have a podcast room in my house. And then we'd just ask each of the questions and we clip it up on. And you'd clip it and make it look like it was a podcast. Yeah. That's quite common now, isn't it? Then you just cut to the point and what's going to get the most views of each question

and stuff like that. Yeah. Maybe we should start doing that. Just do clips from. Yeah. Right, let's do it. Have a word and get out of it. It's the jingle.

It's very good. So, catchy. This is that ice cold machine. Luke says, Lids, have a word with my girlfriend, Jess. She's been selling all her clothes on Vinted and made herself £90, which is great. The problem is she uses girl maths

and uses that £90 as an excuse to buy more clothes. She must have bought £300 worth of clothes using the excuse while I made that £90 quid on Vinted, so this is essentially free clothes. Then she ends up skint and I have to float her some money. Have a word with her. and any girls that use this girl math logic, it's bollocks. Oh, leave her out.

Once she misses. Yeah. If she's making money to... Like, pick up the slack. Yeah. Buy something for her. Buy some clothes for her. I sell my stuff on Vinton now.

Like, my missus runs my vintage. You don't. Yeah. She runs it. So if I, like, sort of get sick of a jacket or whatever, just put it on. And we just split it down the middle. They're my clothes. She runs it.

I do that with my assistant. Yeah. Just like give her a cash here and there. like really, I just give her a job to pay, put my clothes on there. So good. What do you, what you splage on though? And that isn't a, that is in the, I recently got like a Birkin. Yeah, but I've got

like, I've got houses and stuff like that in cars already, so it's like... How much is a Birken? It was 19 grand. What the fuck is a Burkin? That's like a reasonable price as well. Did you have to play the game or did you... No, no, no, I got it from like a contact. Right, yeah, okay. What's a Merkin?

Burkin. Burkin, it's a bag. Burkin's a cube wig. That's where I was going to computer. I thought he spent 19 grand on a pub wig. I really felt confused. I'm murking. I've never heard of that. Yeah, it's a pub wig, yeah.

Hey, look. But you can get a bush on it? Could you get a bush for a girl? Was it just for a man? Yeah, yeah, no. Yeah, you can get a little pub wig on your burkin. You could get a murkin burkin, burkin. You know, I might actually, can you just get them from online?

Yeah, love funny. Because I love the look for bush. Yeah, like a 70s shoes. Mine's not. It's a bit like sprawled out now. I've had a bit of, um, laser hair removal. I've had that. on my back.

So he can't. Do it work well? He can't grow a bush on his back anymore. I know. He's gutted. Bushes are coming back in. Not on his back. I don't think they'll ever be fully back in, you know.

Do you know why? I love a bush. Gives it a bit of personality. Do you know what a bush is for me? It's like a curry from an Indian. It's like I like it. But I don't want it as often as I want a Chinese, which is a waxed pussy.

Yeah. But what about just a triangle on top? As long as it doesn't get in the way. Yeah, you're not touching anything. That's like a popadum. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I want Chinese. Every now and again, I'll have an Indian,

but also I can't have the Indian and just have the Indian. I have to have like halfway between a Chinese and an Indian for a bit, and I don't want that either. The analogy is limited. So, Burke, and what else? You must be, most, surely, we know you're making good money.

Like, that's not a secret, is it? Like, cause, what? Yeah, my houses, do like stocks. I've got an Isa, I've got a pension, shit like that. Pension, what a flex? Making loads of money, get a pension. No, but you don't, it's tax-free. Yeah, that is true.

But you get it in like 50 years. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's tax-free. So it's the main thing I'm not trying to get down is my tax. Yeah. So, and then like, what are they called them, Isas that are also tax-free? Tax-free Aces.

Yeah. Can I just say we look. With this clothes thing, every girlfriend, every wife is going to spend money on clothes. Unless your missus is making £90 back. Yeah, you just want to eat it. It's always going to happen. At least there's some coming back. Trailing your clothes, they get new ones.

It's not wrong with that at all. Also, genuinely, this is what Vincent is for. If you are a little bit lower on your income and you need money to buy clothes and that's the thing you like buying, the best thing you can do is get rid of the stuff you're not going to wear and make money off it to buy the next stuff. Yeah. She's doing it, I think. You decided to have a girlfriend

and now you complain in about what girlfriends do. Exactly. Yeah. Like I'm like, have a way with my missus. She's got two legs and a pussy and an asshole.

I don't like it. I don't know if I'd read that one out. Could you sell the Birkin on? Yeah. The Burkings appreciate. Oh, it's an investment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The second you own that,

you now have more money. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, shit, I'm gonna put. Yeah, they really go up in price. Put money into Burkins. Merkins, they lose their value. Like, I bet, A bit like 10, 15 years ago

that was probably worth like 5 to 7K. Right. But you have to play the game where you go into the shop and you go, can I buy a bag and they go, no. It's the, it's like Rolexes.

And cars as well. You've got to be on a waiting list for a burkin. Yeah, you have to buy one about a shit bag. There you go, I want that bag and they go, you can have three of these. And if you go, okay, in six months, they might sell you that bag. Yeah.

Same with watches and cars now as well. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Stick with Merkin. What do you guys invest in? I don't invest. I just like...

I like Guinness and that? Guinness. Right. A good time, them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love that. Memories. I feel like people, like, are so hard done by.

Like, ooh, where have you put your money? And it's like, fuck me. I love to have a good time. That's about it. Yeah. I enjoy my life. Yeah. I like that.

I like being able to just see a pair of pants and buy the pants. I'm glad. Because sometimes it feels like you're on that, who's that guy's podcast? Stephen Bartlett. And he's like, I've had a glass of wine. I ruined my whole entire life.

Have you seen that? Yeah. Said he had, was it one or two glasses of wine? He said it ruined three days of his life. And it's like, do you know what? Me's just fucking shut up.

I'm sorry. Shut up. What's your life if you, what life have you got then? Well, because he's an investor in Woop. Yeah, his Woop scores down for three.

Like I monitor myself with this now, and it is helping me. But I sort of resent it in a way. Because it is like sort of... Yeah, mine, shall trap me. It's tracking and trying to over-optimise every point of your life. And do you know what I think is a bit underrated in the modern world? Just waking up and feeling shit sometimes and just getting on with it. Yeah.

I feel like that's like a placebo effect. Like if it says, oh, you had a shit night's sleep, then you're like, yeah, I've had a shit night's sleep. To be fair, I think this is... Since I've started wearing it, because we were sponsored by these a couple of years ago. Oh, sorry. No, no, no, not anymore.

And then recently I was like, do you know what? I want to start, like, tracking a few things because I never feel great when I wake up from a sleep really unless it's been like perfect. Right. So I just want to like monitor myself a bit.

I think this has been fairly accurate. Like, if I wake up feeling shit in a check, I've normally had a shit recovery or a shit sleep. And if I wake up and I'm like, fucking hell I feel good, the recovery and the sleep are quite high. So I think it's being pretty accurate with me. But I'm using it.

basically as a step counter and to just make sure like everything's all right and that like, you know, me pulses at the right thing and I'm not like whatever, it's all right. I think a lot of people, and that's the epitome of it, that like clip where he's like the wine wrote me off for three days. It's like, so what? Yeah. It's fucking three days out of your life. Like just you should have had 10 glasses of wine.

It still would have only been three days. It wouldn't have gone into the fourth one. Like it's okay to just fucking put a night in the fucking wall and then for a few days feel a bit shit. Yeah. You don't have to feel your absolute best every day. Like optimal health every single day. Yeah. You can just feel shit for a Chinese love. Yeah. Or an Indian. Yeah. Or an Indian once in a one. Also, surely if you feel a bit shit, you're living life properly. It's like what you define living life properly. Yeah. That's how you know how good it is because then you have something to compare it to them. Yeah. Like if you, I feel great every day. It's like, well, you do

the shit that makes you feel really good. Because the shit that makes you feel really good, makes you feel like shit. Yeah. Yeah, you're not doing fun shit, you're doing boring shit. I think Stephen Bartlett's a bad pint. I'm going to throw it out there. Yeah.

A bad glass of wine. He's sat there sipping his wine going, oh, I'm going to feel awful on Tuesday. I'll come for a drink with you, but my week is in love it. Bore off, Stephen. Lily, that's been great. Thank you so much for coming on.

Thank you. I really appreciate you having me. Although we're not going to play it, I'd love to promote a piece of music, Finn. Thanks, Dan. I did a live session filmed by Will Hutchby in March at Kemptson Street Studio. So this is the first single from that.

We've been doing this cover for just over a year now, which is Hole Again by Atomic Kitten, but it's turned into like a rock, pop rock kind of anthem. So it's on Spotify. It's in the description. Go and listen to it. I'm going to actually listen to this one. Come and see Dan Nightingale and Friends.

Starts in August, goes through to February, about 30 shows around the country. Dan Nightingale.com for all the tickets. Adam's on tour. Holgan. Hulligan's good name for the scene as well. Hole again. That'd be a good scene name. Stick to your day job.

This is me day job. Stick to my day job. He's just out of him making clips. Adam's on tour. Adamrow.com. UK. Any plugs? Film club tickets may be sold out now.

It's on sale now. Go and check. Right, Lily. Thanks so much for coming on. See everyone. Bye. Pleasure.