HealthyGamerGG - Why are we scared of being bored?

Episode Date: March 1, 2022

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And generally speaking, the more that we feed our insecurities, the worse they get. The more time we spend away from them, generally speaking, the better they get. But it's not going to target and fix a particular insecurity. It's not going to metabolize that emotion, if that makes sense. This is a great question. Why are we scared of being bored? Because we don't know how to manage that anymore. Right?

We've forgotten how to manage ourselves in boredom. And that's why we're scared of it. Ah. So what if you really miss the past? Like that's very common, right? Missing the past is really, really easy. But it's okay to miss the past. The problem is that if you get stuck, because the past is never going to come back. And in fact, recreating the past is only going to lead to present suffering. Because you just can't, it's just impossible, right? So let's say like you had a wonderful romantic relationship. That romantic relationship ends. And then you're looking for someone to,

fill that person's shoes. As you're looking for someone to fill that person's shoes, like, no one is going to fill their shoes perfectly. So all you are setting yourself up for is an expectation that will never be met and will lead to suffering. Not only that, you will lose appreciation for the person who comes next, right? Because you're holding them up to a standard that, like, they're never going to meet. And instead of appreciating that person for who they are, you're trying to, like, turn them

into the past. So if you miss the past, which is normal, right? It's okay. Then I think like grieving it, letting it go, accepting that it's gone and recognizing that tomorrow is another day, today is another day, and that there's an opportunity for enjoyment and pleasure and satisfaction and growth today. You can absolutely do that. Can I multitask in the present? No. I don't think it is technically possible to multitask. Generally speaking, the mind can only focus on one thing at a time. So multitasking, is not, you're not technically multitasking. You're just rotating tasks very quickly. Will this help deal with my insecurities? I hope so. But this is where if you're targeting

insecurities, let me think about how to, let me think about how. So if we're talking about fixing insecurities, the way this will help with your insecurities is that you will spend less time with them. The process of metabolizing an insecurity, is different from this. All we're doing here is training our mind to spend less time with the unpleasantness.

That it'll absolutely do. But as we kind of talked about, you know, like, no, this is where if we kind of look at, you know, these issues of like ego and comparison, that's where your insecurities are.

So your insecurities will manifest in this way, but like by spending time away from our comparison and ego and stuff like that. So for example, if you're doing surreesome, and a muskar, which is a set of yoga postures, out on your balcony in the sunshine, like, you're just, it's just hard to be insecure if you're just absorbed in that practice. Right? If you're, like, taking a nice shower, it's just hard to be, like, absorbed in your

insecurities in that moment. If you're eating, let's say, a nice bowl of butternut squash soup and your attention is absorbed there, like, your insecurities just won't be present in your mind in that moment. So it'll be helpful in the sense that it'll, Give your mind time away from that. And generally speaking, the more that we feed our insecurities, the worse they get. The more time we spend away from them, generally speaking, the better they get. But it's not going to target and fix a particular insecurity. It's not going to metabolize that emotion, if that makes sense.

How do I deal with expectations of the present? There is no such thing as expectations of the present. Expectation by nature of its thing is a future-oriented thing. Right? It's tricky. but there's no expectation of the present. The present is what is. An expectation is what you think will be.

So how do I deal with comparing myself to others? So that involves the ego, right? So I would say that's a complicated question. We've answered it in detail. So I'm not going to go into all of it here, but I'll direct you to some resources. The first is I'm sure we have YouTube videos and stuff about that. I think we have resources on our wiki about that.

And then there's this segment of Dr. Kay's Guide to Meditation called the Atmanpada, which is the path of self, which goes into a lot of detail about the nature of self and ego. There's a wiki, yes. Right? So we have some, yeah, we have a wiki. Check it out. How can you relate this to Raging in League? We'll talk about, you already talk about raging in league? Let's move on.

Okay. So hopefully that's helpful. You know, it's tricky. It's not the simplest thing, but work at it. Y'all will get there. Ah, is it healthy to control every reaction to the present? I don't know exactly what that question means, but your initial response to things is not usually something you can control,

unless you're talking about a behavior. So generally speaking, I think the right move is to let your reaction happen, but then let it wash through you and then sort of behave in a non-reactive manner. And if you mean reaction is a behavior, then, yeah, you don't want to do that. But like, for example, if I drink this water and it doesn't taste perfect, I want to just acknowledge that, let that pass through me and just appreciate, okay, at least like, you know, my mouth is less dry now. So I can be grateful for that. That was pretty good.

So, yeah. Dr. Kay, why do I never have questions about anything? Because you are brilliant. And you are one of the, one of the most, all knowledge. is already yours right