Heroes in Business - Wes Geer guitarist for Korn and founder Rock To Recovery

Episode Date: September 12, 2021

Secrets to Breaking Addition and Saving Lives Through Music Experience. Wes Geer guitarist for Korn founder Rock to Recovery, and Dr. Constance Scharff Celebrity Addiction Counselor, of Rock to Recovery are interviewed by David Cogan founder of Eliances and Famous celebrity host of the Eliances Heroes Show broadcast on AM and FM radio, podcast syndication.    

Up in the sky, look, it's captivating, it's energizing, it's Eliance's Heroes. Eliance's is the destination for entrepreneurs, investors, CEOs, inventors, leaders, celebrities, and startups, where our heroes in business align. Now, here's your host flying in, David Kogan, founder of Eliance's. That's right. And you know, we're back again, because we're going to lock the secrets of people who are successful and making a difference in the world. That's what this show is all about, learning from them. And thank you again for the feedback we continue to get when I interviewed the co-founder of Oracle. So make sure that you go to alliances.com to check out past episodes because as you know, it is the only

place where entrepreneurs align. And all right, so we've got something really interesting today that we're going to share with you. And you're going to be amazed because it's what's going on with ROC. And what do I mean? And how is ROC helping you? Well, we've got with us Wes Gere and Constance Scharf, ROC to Recovery. They're both part of ROC to Recovery. Now, what's ROC to Recovery? We're going to learn about that. And Wes is holding up, for those of you that are watching, Wes is holding up something really those of you that are watching, Wes is holding up something really good. In fact, Wes, let's start with you. What is that that you're holding up? Well, this is a book that's 18 stories that cover transformations that people have had from every demographic, from all sorts of challenges like addiction, veterans, sexual trauma, etc. That,

by the way, our music program, Rock the Recovery, was an important part and an important catalyst to their transformation. It's really a book of hope. And so, and we'll get with you, Constance, in a minute here is, Wes, why did you get involved and what role do you play with it and what was the motivation? Well, I was a musician struggling with a deadly addiction. And I ended up in a rehab. And I saw some of the modalities they were using in rehab, like yoga and drawing pictures. And then as a result of my sobriety, I started playing guitar with the band Korn.

And I toured around the world for a number of years. And then when that gig was coming to an end, I was really left with what do I do now? So I wanted to circle back and create a way that music, the use of playing music for non-musicians could be proliferated as a therapeutic modality in a variety of treatment settings. Okay, great, great. So how was that traveling around with corn? I mean, everybody knows that band. It was great. I was sober, no hangovers and living the rockstar life.

I really enjoyed it. And sober, did you say? Sober the entire time because I was shown a program that is a solution. I didn't have to hide from my addiction. I could go out and face the world where the world meets me with tools for recovery. Okay. And then, so Constance, talk to us about your role. Now, you're the vice president. Is

that right? I am. I'm the vice president of Rock to Recovery, the NPO. Yeah, I was working as the director of research for a very high end treatment facility in Malibu where Rock to Recovery was one of the programs. I was there giving continuing education to our psychotherapists. And one of our program administrators, Sunny Mayo, whose story is in this book, said, do you want to come see my session? And I said, absolutely, because my area of research and emphasis is the clinical application of complementary therapies. So just like Wes was saying, yoga and acupuncture and somatic treatments, breath work and so forth. And I was like, I want to see this music thing. And I have to be honest, I really wanted to see the music because I thought

it was going to be a tremendous failure. I thought, how can you write and record a song with non-musicians in detox in an hour? And I was blown away by the session, not just the outcomes of the session, but also, yeah, I was, but also the next day, the people who had been in the sessions were so proud of their work. They were sharing their songs with each other because we have over 20,000 songs in our song library written by rock to recovery participants. And they were proud of themselves. You never see addicts and alcoholics, especially in detox, who are proud of the work that they have accomplished. especially in detox, who are proud of the work that they have accomplished. And that I immediately, I quit that job before the end of the year. I was gone from that job before the end of the year and started working with Rock to

Recovery because I really believe in what we do. So to either one of you, how and when should someone contact Rock to Recovery? And again, you can go to rocktorecovery.org. We've got with us Wes Gere and Constance Scharf. Rock to Recovery. Again, rocktorecovery.org. We've got with us Wes Gere and Constance Scharf, rocktorecovery, again, rocktorecovery.org. I'll defer to the doc on that one. Well, you can call us anytime. I mean, my first suggestion is to read our book. It is out anywhere books are sold. It's available on ebook as well. An audio book will be coming out in the next few weeks, sometime in September. So, you know, learn about what we do.

And then we are not we work with more than 100 different treatment facilities and the Department of Defense. But we also just if people need help, reach out. Info at rock to recovery dot org comes directly to me and we'll be happy to help you find the resources that you're looking for we also have online free programming um since the pandemic started that you can become a part of it's all on our website all right so wes one of the questions we have came in and in regards to corn uh when you toured with corn what's one of the most memorable experiences you had with them? Well, you know, as human nature goes, I love telling the stories. We tend to remember the not so good stuff almost more. I did have a magical show with a lightning storm and shooting sideways and laser light show and rainstorm to 80,000 people.

But I'll tell you about the time in front of 60,000 people in Russia. I forgot my part and I kept forgetting it every time it came around on the chorus. And I was like, what is going on here? And then in the middle of the song, it drops down to just the kick drum, boom, boom, boom. And me going, no, no, no, no, no. And I could not remember my part in front of 60,000 people. And I was very sober and well-rested. I had no excuse. And that's what happened. So I'll always remember that moment. So I guess the point is that we all blow it. You know what I mean? We all miss the shot. We it's, it's going to happen. And, and yeah,

for the three days until the next gig, I was beating myself up, but I'm alive. I'm okay. We live to fight another day. And, and Constance, how, how do we know, you know, a lot of us, right. When we are addicted to something, it's in denial. At what point do you actually, at what point does one recognize that it is an addiction? Is it someone telling them that they have an addiction? How does that come to be? Well, we, you know, both Wes and I are in recovery. We have about 40 years, the two of us together of clean time. And, you know, mostly it comes very late, right?

When the person who has an addiction problem usually doesn't see it before everybody else in their life knows. What I try to do, we call it raising the bottom, right? To get people to see it earlier. When you start having consequences, right? When you start being late for work and your friends are saying, hey, this isn't cool. And your kids are embarrassed of you. And those are the times that's when we really can make dramatic impacts without you having to lose your business, your car, your house, your family, all your health, all of those other things. So when you start having consequences. Yeah.

Is there any is there a such thing as any good addiction? Is there is this good addiction exist? Well, addiction by its definition is negative, right? That it's too much. So there are things that you could do, right? Exercising regularly, right? You know, Wes is fantastic about, he has a great exercise regimen. But if you're addicted to exercise, well, then you're doing it too much to the point where you have negative consequences like, you know, blowing out your knees and, you know, not being able to show up for other things and so on and so forth. So addiction is never a good thing. Wes, when you're performing on stage, when you're performing on stage and that, what's going, I want to know,

share with our audience or listeners and viewers, like what's going through? Do you feel the music through your body, through your mind? What are you thinking about? Are you thinking about, okay, I need to do the next key? You know, where do I stand? What's going on? What's the detail? You're hoping by the time you're on stage, the song is almost by rote.

So it's muscle memory. So then it becomes like an expressive, natural extension of your body. And being that I play rock music, we tend to have a lot of, you know, our own version of dance moves. So hopefully you're putting an emotion behind it and you're not thinking so much about the parts. Of course, there's a lot of, a little bit of memory. We talked about one that didn't work for me. There's a little bit of memory work there and trying to be on cue

and make sure you're in time with the drummer and stuff. But really, we're trying to put our emotions and our energy into the performance, into every note we hit. Yeah, that's phenomenal what you guys are doing.

And again, everyone can learn more by going to rocktorecovery.org. Where can we get the book? Amazon, best spot, amazon.com. Here's the book right here, Rock to Recovery. People who are reading it are saying they're getting a lot out of it. This is a great thing to give people.

You asked earlier about how do you know if you have a problem. One thing that was taught to me is people that don't have a problem do you know if you have a problem one thing that was taught to me is people that don't have a problem don't wonder if they have a problem so uh this is a great opportunity if you know somebody out there or you yourself are struggling uh you might find some hope or kind of get a little bit of direction in here you could give it to somebody who's searching for answers either one of you tell us about another one of the success stories, something, somebody where you saw come in and there's somebody who read the book, just something of, of, of to give hope because we've got a lot of people right now

that are listening and watching and you know, they're addicted to something, whether maybe they, if they're thinking they're addicted to it, they're probably addicted to it. And others that know that they are because their family's been telling them constantly, is there a way out? Can, you know, is there a point of no return or is there always a way out? There is always a way out. There is always a way out. If you are still breathing, there is still hope for you. And I mean that with all sincerity, whether you get our book or not, like there is hope and there is help for you. One of my favorite stories in the book, I love all the stories in the book because I did all the interviews, but one of my favorite stories in

the book is of Sarah, who was a therapist who was in recovery for about 17 years, if I'm remembering correctly, and was kidnapped and sex trafficked. And she still came, she lost everything. She lost all her money. She lost her family. She lost custody of her child. And yet through music, and she's very clear about how music specifically helped her. Through music, she was able to find a reason to live and to find a new career. She's become an artist. She's gone back east. She's from the Carolinas. She's gone back east.

And she's working it out with her family and having visitations with her child. She would have killed herself. Without Rock to Recovery, she would have died. And we find that, too too in our section on veterans, the same kinds of stories. Without Rock to Recovery, they would have died. And I'm so grateful to be a part of this organization. One thing I'd just like to add really quickly

is that we have to remember that there's somebody out there that was poorer than us, more traumatized than us, richer than us, more successful, and has recovered. There's always people out there who've had it worse or better than you and made a way out. So thinking, which is often the case for people struggling, I'm too sick, I'm not worth it, I'm not good enough, this won't work for me, is actually really the only obstacle because it can and will work for you if you give it a chance. And it starts with asking for help and saying, I don't know what I'm doing. Please help me. What about parents? What can they do to help maybe look or identify things that happen with children that are addicted or that have the have, some of the signs of what they believe may be addiction. What kind of tips, you know, since both of you have been through recovery, what would

maybe you would have liked to have seen from an adult or from a parent? So there are parents of minor children and adult children. By the time people are contacting me, their children are usually adults. For those who have minor children, there are many, many resources. The problem is that parents don't usually know how to access them or how to look for them and so contacting someone like me or another professional in your local area to find out what the resources are a great place to go is psychology today which has a database of therapists and people in your local area who can tell you what your local resources are at all sorts of price points. Because unfortunately, most resources for young people are not covered by insurance.

Then if you have an adult child, it's really trying to show them that they have a problem and not love what we call loving them to death, but setting really firm boundaries and saying, you need to get yourself together and I'm going to help you do that, but I'm not going to help you kill yourself. Yeah, that was key for me. I had, you know, we look at people on the streets. How did you end up homeless or drug addict or whatever? If I didn't have a couple of people in my life say, we're not letting you do this to yourself. You can get help or we're walking away from you. That's actually what saved my life. And what we have to understand is things like addiction are a family disease. And oftentimes, as Constance alluded to, the parents can actually be killing their children by helping them too much. And really, oftentimes, the parents have

to look at their own behaviors. And if I'm in a, let's say I'm a father or even a sister or brother, and I have an addict or an alcoholic near me, I'm getting sick too. And so the strongest thing we can do in these situations is make sure we're staying in a very, you know, spiritual, connected, healthy mental place. So oftentimes the parents and the family need counseling and therapy as well. Well, it's amazing what both of you are doing. First, I want to do now a little bit of snooping. We're going to start with Constance first. Man, I see an incredible amount of books behind you in that.

All right. So there's a fire in your place and you can only pull one book, one book behind you besides the rock to recovery one. See, Wes, I caught you on that. Besides that one, what other one would you pull? I have an antique dictionary that my great, great grandparents had. That's what I would pull because all of these can be replaced. Excellent. All right. Now, Wes, talk to us about something unique. I think maybe we're in your family room here, bedroom.

What's something unique in your room? Well, I mean, the most important and unique thing is my beautiful Martin guitar. I love it. Yeah. I'm not going to do a concert for you because I just heard my guitar out of tune and I'm not going to make the viewers all listen to me go and tune the guitar, but that's something unique. This is my living room, by the way. We got a little way backwards. That's my project studio right there where I write and record music ideas. Got to have it close by. When inspiration hits, I can roll right off the couch and record. And Wes, where do your best ideas come to be able to write music? Like where does it come from? I think a lot of us musicians think we're channeling in some sense of the word. And that's why so many musicians and artists like drugs or other things that get them out of their head,

get disconnected from the head that says, oh, you always write that or you always use those two chords. So a lot of times I get it in meditation. I like to really get into a zone where I'm playing long enough or sitting long enough that I feel disconnected from my logical brain and kind of can just feel music in a very vibrational sense. And how did you know you had the skill? Like at what point was it that, I mean, you've got a very unique skill and Constance, you do too. Where did it come from? You know, when I get this question, I think of people like a Kobe Bryant. Why did he go and shoot 5 million free throws by himself? And I feel like on some level, we're usually called to do it. I don't feel like I had much choice. I heard music and I heard the electric guitar. I grew

up on classical music and I was like, I want to know how to make that sound. And I got a guitar and I couldn't stop playing. It wasn't like, okay, I better go practice my guitar today. I was obsessed. And I think most people who are great at what they do, that's part of the equation. I have the same thing with writing. When I feel a story or hear a character speaking to me or whatever, I literally have to I have to go write it down. And like what Wes was saying about channeling, you know, I don't want to, you know, sound too weird. But, you know, you'll hear the voices in your head. They're having a conversation. These characters are having a conversation and we have to capture that.

Well, it's amazing what you both are doing, Wes and Constance. Thank you. You provide a way for those who struggle, find music in a sober lifestyle. That's a hero, Wes here, and Constance Sharp, Rock to Recovery, get their book,

Helping Non-Musicians Use Music as a Tool for Healing Addiction. That's right. Make sure you go to rocktorecovery.org. All right, Wes, take us home.