Hey Riddle Riddle - #147: Leg Day

Episode Date: May 12, 2021

You made it to Wednesday! We are so proud of you! The Clew Crew is fully vaccinated so they are trying to get invites to each other’s houses! Let’s see if that works! They also introduce us to some new friends - a time traveler, a bad magician and a guy at a gym. There’s also a cooking show and a wine tasting that don’t go so well! Grab your new mesh tank tops and let’s do some riddles! Starring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifEditing by: Casey ToneyTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & printsWant to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a little bit more. I'm gonna get you a little bit more. My feet before hit with the brick dome. Hey, welcome y'all. Come on in. I'll put you in this booth over here. Oh, thank you so much. Oh, are you mocking me? No, this is my voice too. Okay.

This is sort of like a yes and? This booth over here? Is that where we're gonna sit? Yeah, this booth right here. Okay, I was mocking you. Yeah, honey, you're making fun of our accents. That's not nice. Sorry, this is my husband, he's very mean.

Charlene, I was not mocking you. I love you. I was mocking this person who I don't care for. Okay, well, welcome to Sunrise Diner. Our special today is a Italian toast. Ooh. Italian toast. Do you have riddles on the menu?

We don't, but I could whip you up some. Can you do mick riddles? We could do mick riddles. We can have a riddle bit of water for the table. Well, hold on, I'm trying to think of a mick riddles. Um, can I have a riddle bit of water for the table? Well hold on, I'm trying to think of a mickrittle. Um, what is a purple sadness? What is a purple sadness? Huh, is this the other way my name is Paul Lind?

Is this your hamburger? Uh, yeah! Okay, I'm not actually... I'm coming around on this person, honey. Oh, okay. Yeah, hamburger. Okay. Sure.

Can I get you some waters or some coffees? Yeah, I love a... Uh, ridden water. Sorry, I'm a... I'm a spoke. Can I get you some water or coffees? Wait, we are a diner-slash-fettics, Hinkos. Oh!

Wait, it's a good thing. You said sorry, I'm a spoke. The accent went away. Yeah. Is this a front? Are you putting this on? No. When I, if I ever say the word, misspoke, I have, I'm miss speaking, right? Because otherwise I'm a liar.

Oh, any tens of misspoke. Mm-hmm. Also, I don't know if you know this. In 2013, we are the bicycle cap of the world. I won. I was crowned Miss Spoke. Oh. Isn't that fun?

My wife was Miss Spokane. Yeah, we're doing a whole lot of talking and not a lot of eating. Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that your wife was Miss Spokane. Sometimes it's hard to misspeak in the present tense. What? Well, I'm Arufah. I'm J.B.C.

And I'm ArufKeeve. I think the new thing to start the show is going to be the most convoluted premise of all of it. You guys, let's try this again. Okay, let's do that. Same thing again. Okay. But we're going to just have streamlined it. Great.

Just very simple, yes, and very easy. Ready? Start over, Adel. Same thing, but we're streamlining it. Okay. Here we go at the booth. Let me get you some copies. I don't like you. I like her. Okay never mind You guys you can't ask them to do something correctly because then the opposite I got to my thing Immediately, okay, but here's the thing We did exactly what you asked and we feel judged. Okay, but here's the thing. Err, we did exactly what you asked, and we feel judged. Okay, well you should feel judged.

Sorry, we feel mic judged. If you guys are ever in an emergency, with Adel and JPC, just go, okay guys, can you please do a bad job? And they're gonna go, don't tell me what to do. I'll do a good job. What do you mean a bad job? You're open to fly around at night,

flopping my little wings and clicking and communicating with Sonar? I don't go, JBC, my arm fell off. You call someone. How are you two? It's nice to see you. Did you get your arm out that, Aaron? Yeah, I love when people look at my arms.

Cause I'm a lady of the 21st century. I love it. I look at my ankles and my arms. I, speaking of looking at arms. So I haven't purchased new clothes in a while. The seasons are changing and it's getting to be warmer outside. And I'm on the hunt. I'm on the hunt to try to find some new tank tops

that I can't find anything. I truly have looked for hours and I can't find anything that I like. Are you gonna talk about buying Durand Durand pants? Where's this going? So on the hunt? Uh, oh. What are you typing in search?

Well, it's not, porn hub just has like category. Oh, okay, okay. Okay, why do I ever ask you any questions? So, but basically whenever I like look, no matter what I type in, what I get a bunch of, is like graphic teas. So what I want is like fun colorful tank tops that are like not like graphic prints and stuff like that.

No, or more like. And when you say tank tops, do you mean like a t-shirt with like the Tiananmen Square protest? Yes, exactly. I mean, that's exactly what I want. Also guys, just a wild amount of pro-Trump tank tops appear against search results still.

It's like, how could this be? How could, how could, how could that, it makes me want it to not be my look anymore. But all this to say is I was like, finally, I couldn't find what I want, but I did buy some new workout tank tops that I could wear. And they came in the mail and it was a three pack. And I guess I didn't pay attention for the three things that I bought, or I just didn't look too closely, but they are mesh.

Like fully mesh. Yeah. And I was like, just didn't look too closely, but they are mesh, like fully mesh. Yeah. And I was like, I can't wear, I can't wear mesh. I have to think I've ever owned something that's mesh, I can't wear this. You don't have to wear those with those 2011 sunglasses that are just the stripes. I got this a bar.

Yeah, the bar. But then I was like, what, you know, and I got it in the mail for turning it as such a hassle. You have to like repackage it, then take it to a place, and these are like, they're for workouts. I'm not wearing them anywhere but my home, so I was like, fine, I'm just gonna keep them. But what I didn't realize is that,

what that means is that now like 40% of my workout, so I made a mesh. So I'm a mesh guy now, I wear a mesh, and that's what's easy with me. You're a bit of a mesh. You're a sloppy mesh guy now. Yeah, I will say. So listeners can't see this,

but you are currently wearing a tank top. Yes. I'm gonna go, I'm gonna be brave today. And I'm gonna say all tank tops are workout tank tops. You can work on, you can work on that fucking shirt. Come on. Well, you can, but you just basically ruin them with like sweat and stuff.

So I, I don't necessarily, I want there to be a separation of church and state and I don't want them to be, I don't want to, I don't want to have like, just completely drenched like a tank top that I'm wearing out to be. I think we need to talk about how you're ruining shirts with your sweat. I mean, if I saw a doctor, he'd be like,

whoa, don't beat me up, Mr. Strong, then. Oh, okay. But no, you know, you work out clothes are different because they do get pretty discolored. I don't know if you guys have ever worked out, but when you're done doing it, you're close kind of our gross. And you're nobody's.

Man, relate. Can't relate, that'll. Yeah, exactly. How are you? Are you working out? I'm working out. OK. Let me flex this part of my body and then this part. I'm not popping off.

That's shimmying. Tuck these over here and bend over. I go. Rolled up into a shell. Wow. I'm not probably going to hurt that crap. I'm a Rolly Polly. When you all were growing up, did you call those little bugs, Rolly Polly, or did you

call them pill bugs? Rolly Polly. Rolly Polly's. Yeah, Rolly Polly's. Okay, because somebody, a camera when this was, but some, some in Chicago, I was like, oh, Rolly Polly's, I haven't seen those in forever. And somebody else was like, what are you saying? And someone said, we call it soda, where I'm from.

And they're like, we call them pill bugs. Hey, Adel, this pill bug roller pulley thing is really fucking interesting, but I got a question for you. We're all, we, Aaron and I now are fully vaccinated. You're fully vaccinated this year. The C says that fully vaccinated people can gather together indoors, you moved during this pandemic.

Where's this invite to this fucking housewarming party my man? Hello! Knock, knock! Knock, knock! I brought a fruit basket! Knock, knock! I bought a basket that's made of fruit that has baskets in it. Hold on, hold on.

We waited for your basket. You know what? I've been recorded in a while and I don't know if I've ever been funny. So can everyone just have lower expectations for me please Here's the thing this is a little embarrassing to say The house warming has cooled off we've been here since October We now use the AC because of the spring and summer weather approaching so You can took them over but it would just be a house party it would no longer be a house the warming is gone

Right we the house was on the windows a house party. It would no longer be a house. The warming is gone. Right? The house was on the windowsill cooling off. It is no longer warm. It was room temp. So it would be a house party. And a house party requires a DJ, a kid, a play, a fun little dance where you knock your shoes together, and some sort of parent coming home,

screaming to high heavens. Now, is that a dancer a handshake? Because I was always out of the impression that it was just an overly complicated handshake. But I guess some of the best handshakes are dances. I'll still argue that house party, and I haven't seen it in the 10 or 15 years. I'll still argue that house party is one of the best.

So are we invited? Absolutely. I don't know what constitutes a house party other than a party inside a house, but it feels like we need more people, which I'm not comfortable with. So we'll just have, um, just invite us over. I think we can do a three player, a three player house party.

Yeah. Maybe play a game, a board game, video game. You can make me a teaky drink. Pretty fun. Deal. Deal. I'll send out the invites. I can point out some chores that you might be needed to do.

Yeah. I'll send out the invites. I can point out some chores that you might be needing to do. Yeah! That's right. JPC can run his finger along the fireplace with my big white glove. This simply won't do. For any job that must be done, there is an element of fun. And then he sings a song.

Our friend. Your friend. Your friend. Your cousin. Just clean up your house. It's horny for your cousin. No. Your house. No, no, no, no. It's horny for your cousin. No, it's just clean up your house.

No, no, no, no. As you're just smashing shit. Yeah, don't invite a server. Moppy Perry, no, please Moppy Perry. Moppy Perry is terrifying. Oh, I assume that O Perry's name is Moppy Perry. Moppy Perry. You guys just as a fun little image for your, for your Wednesday.

JPC and Mary Poppins hat. You're welcome, world. I'm sorry. Perry Moppins. Perry Moppins. Who's also my favorite detective? The other one I thought was a play on Matthew Perry. That was a guy like that too.

Please don't go. Perry Moppins. We love you. Could I be any more your housekeeper? She's a housekeeper. She's a nanny. Perry Poppins. A lot of your commentary doesn't hold up. Perry Muppins can we jump into a painting made of chalk again and going and

adventure together. Perry Muppins are you having sex? Perry Muppins. It seems like they're second pension between the two's abuse. You went inside that painting, but you just knocked all the characters down. Perry Moppenies can't wait. Anything new for you? No, I am technically an LA resident.

I went out there, grabbed my keys, spent five days organizing, driving around, getting furniture off of Facebook Marketplace and walk around my neighborhood. It was so nice. I love my neighborhood and it's very green and I'm so excited and I can't wait. Aaron, I don't wanna turn the tables too fast

to make anyone's dinner spillover, but you have this new place and we're all fully vaccinated and it just feels like. You wanna fly to LA waiting on our invites to Housewarming no no Aaron I want to be flown to LA Glory to LA Yeah, of course what you guys can come and say literally whenever and I hope that you do And I hope that we have live shows out there and that you, we all hang out.

And I, yeah, I, okay. And then when I come back here, I stay with both of you, somehow at the same time, half the night at one house, half the night at the other house, a terrible house guest. You can physically stay at JPCs, but mentally check out and then emotionally stay at my place. Aaron, I have said this over and over and over again,

Sean and Lou are always welcome here. Um. Okay, here's the thing. If you live in Los Angeles and you have any places to recommend to me for like buying very, very cheap rugs because why the fuck are rugs so expensive? Aaron, I got a website for you where we bought some cheap rugs.

And they're great. It's, I think it's just rugsUSA.com. Ooh, I'm looking for a mob or lavender lilac kind of rug. Um, that's a good idea. Okay, well, I'm not your personal fucking assistant, okay? Right, this guy wasn't recommendation. Wow. Um, wow. Yeah, I like cheap furniture. You guys, it's expensive. It's so expensive to move. Oh, it's so expensive. So if you have any recommendations, please. Let me know.

But that's my update. I'm happy to be here. I'm excited to see you guys. You're both very funny. You're pretty funny. I don't know the difference between the two of you quite yet. One of you wears a hat, four, one wears one back.

Well, one of us is going to shave our facial hair on the left and the other will shave it on the right. I don't know my left for my right. I'm like, you want to know how we got these scars? Speaking of not knowing what's going on. One of us only speak in lies and the other will only speak in screams. Okay.

I think you know who's who. Oh my god. I wish I could only speak in screams. I'm like 80% there. I feel like you're the lie one. I like trying to such that out of like, one of us only tells lies. And whatever is only,

it's just like, well wait a minute. To me, you're both both. All right, I'm old man. I'm old lady riddles or whatever by day is old man puzzles. And I have been doing a riddle podcast for about 150 episodes.

So I would like to give you more riddles. Thank you so much. Wait, okay, so just to be clear, this is episode 147. You're not doing another riddle podcast that's only done like three episodes, right? You're in. I just started on a new one called riddle hey.

It's so much better. And it's a lot better. Riddle hey. I hate to tell you this, but it's too very funny women in me. So it's a lot better. I hate to tell you this, but it's too very funny women in me. So that is already better. That is a death nail. And they don't lie and they don't scream. All right, here we go. This is our first listener submitted riddle from Laura McCarver. Yeah, first ever.

We've been making up the rest of them. First time all the time. Yeah, Laura Macarver from New Jersey. It's OK to use my full name. Hi, Clu Crude. Thank you so much for your wonderful podcast, Lier. I can't count how many times I've cried from laughing so hard.

I wanted to contribute some riddles. I've learned over the past couple of years. I don't think you've done these yet. I hope they're fun Thank you Laura. Thank you for new Jersey if that is even a real place Hey, I'm just glad Just a heads up Laura. I don't know if you know this but I follow a lot of food trends and new Jersey was just named the number one pizza state in the US Okay, it beat out in New York and Chicago. Huge news. Well, pizza's not that great. All right, here's the thing about I'm moving,

so I can say this. Chicago pizza's not very good. There's good pizza here, but deep dish sucks. Deep dish absolutely sucks. I will say this, deep dish is good. No. No one would eat deep dish if it wasn't good. It's pizza soup.

It will kill you though. You can't have more than two slices of deep disher, you will die. Show me a deep dish, pizza. Uh-oh, you just showed me a casserole. Yeah, it's pizza soup and it's lame. Yeah, I gave you a Chicago. Are you also saying that you wouldn't eat a casserole? Yes.

No, I only had a casserole on Thanksgiving, but I don't want to fold the slice of casserole and stuff in my mouth. Your family's making Thanksgiving casserole? Green bean casserole, am I crazy? Okay, so what you're talking about is hot green beans. You can't compare deep dish beans to the hot green beans. We put that French onion soup on top.

All right, Aaron, let's hear this riddle. Yeah, but just, if you ever come to Chicago, skip the deep dish. It's not worth it. Just don't do it. You'll want to meet with the people. You'll need to nap the rest of dish. It's not worth it. Just don't do it. You'll want to meet the people. You'll need to nap the rest of the day. If you're a tourist, don't eat it.

I completely disagree. If you're a tourist, that's the only person who should be eating the deep dish. Everyone that I've ever brought to Chicago that have got deep a guide, people from England that got deep dish, people from Florida that got deep dish, they enjoy it for the novelty of it. But no one here is eating it twice a week.

Do you think England and Florida are the two most impressive places you could list off? Honestly, I was just talking about the places that I've actually met people from, and it's England and Florida. I had an Uber driver who was the most negative person I've ever met in my life, and she was so contrary, and it was so like, it's a bad night.

I know you guys, it was crazy. I was dying laughing. She hated everything, and it was so like, Challenge accepted. I know you guys, it was crazy. I was dying laughing. She hated everything. And we finally were like, if you could live in any city, where would you go? Because we told her we were moving to LA and she's like, oh, horrible.

And we were like, oh yeah, we love Chicago though. And she's like, oh, horrible. And we were like, you live here. We were like, where would you want to live? But she was like, Key West. Anytime I'm in Key West, I feel like I'm flying. Well, that's how you're up there. I mean, I've been in Key West. You have to fly or you have to drive. Is she taking like fucking acid in Key West? Is that what she's doing? Every time I go to

her, I'm flying. You guys, she was like, I've been to, she was like, my husband and I just went to New Orleans. It was a lifelong dream, but we hated all the food. And we're like, oh, do you like spicy food? She's like, we hate spicy food. And we're like, do you like seafood? And she's like, we hate seafood. And we were naming all these New Orleans places and she didn't go to any of them. She didn't go to a single touristy thing.

And we're like, it was your lifelong dream to go to New Orleans. We were like, did you go to Cafe De MaAmand? And she was like, what's that? What, you got in New Orleans and you hate the food? You're the problem. The good news is it sounds like hard or husband or a really good match. Oh yeah. I told, I told you that.

I was like, I would spend, give $1,000 today to hear one recording of them ordering at a restaurant together. Because they are the most negative. Oh God, I couldn't even believe it. She was like, well, I had one good Margarita there. And I was like, I've loved the margaritas I've had in New Orleans. And she was like, I actually don't drink that much. And I don't always order margaritas. And I was like, welcome. Welcome to Felix. Welcome to Felix's oyster house. We're known

for our char-girled oysters. Can I take your order? Can I get the chicken breast? Yeah. And I'm going to hate it. But she also, I told her I love oysters and she went, I can't even imagine. And I was like, okay. All right, so anyway, Laura, here are the warm-up riddles that Laura sent us. Oh, thank God. Lighter than what I am made of, more of me is hidden than seen.

Lighter than what I am made of, more of me is hidden than seen. Bird pillowcase. A bird. Bird. That's just a pile of feathers on a little bit of cloth. A bird inside a pillowcase. Oh, that sounds terrifying. That was horrible.

That's the best way to get a bird out of your house. Pillowcase. Is it? No. Make a fall asleep. And then, and then shoot you. That's not a good. Not a pillow case, but if you do have a bird in your house,

you're supposed to take a big blanket or a sheet and throw it over the bird. And so then you can easily scoop it up and take it outside and air it out of the sheet. All right, here we go. Yes. Lighter than what I am made of, more of me is hidden than seen.

Okay, so lighter than what I'm made of, that doesn't make sense because, unless you're a lighter in a term. What about the cigarette lighter? Oh, that's great. So lighter than what I'm made of. So propane. What if it's, is it made of meringue?

No. Oh, meringue. I'm made of meringue. Somebody flew to Key West. Key West, I feel like I'm flying. Okay. Later than what I am made of is it like is this like baking? No, then what I'm doing is you can do with dessert, but are you guys hungry?

Is it though does that sound to do with like a word? Like it's made up of letters and then no, okay, is the answer to this a word? Or just some sounds yeah Lighter than what I'm made of I would say the best part of this is the more of me is hidden unseen oh Glacier yeee Can't what's another word for that banana iceberg? Yeah, oh lettuce. No Yeah, oh let us no it's not It's an iceberg. It's an iceberg. I would like to see a scene okay you two were the look out It's on let's just say the Titanic and one of you

See's an iceberg, but you like are having a feeling that maybe it's too late to say something Can I just say sir that being on this massive boat, it feels like I'm flying. It feels like you're flying, well, you should try getting up onto the bow of the ship. Ooh! We could go up there right now if you'd like. Ooh, deep bow? Ha ha ha ha ha! Charles!

You slay me, you truly are so funny. No, no, no, come, we'll go to the front here, up onto the bow, which I believe is the front. It will go right up here. Now put your arms out and you can totally feel like you're flying. Oh, look, I'm Jesus Christ. This is the same pose that he does. All right, hold on. How is? What? Calm down.

What? No, you said put your arms out and that's what Jesus Christ does. Yes, but I'm deeply religious and that oh frankly won't do. Oh am I fired? Well, I don't know does a passenger have the authority to just fire a crew member? If so, no, no. That wouldn't be the Christian thing for me to do. No, you're not fired and apology will suffice. What is the Christian thing to do? Well, start a war. Interesting. Oh, what is that glimmer? There's some sort of glimmer out there in the water. Look at some sort of... Hello, I made a vice.

Ooh. Oh, it's some sort of ice woman. Oh, I've been iceberg, Lou! Oh! Hi! Oh, now, Charles, I know that is. That's one of those X-Men that we've, uh, that's saved our world and our planet. Wow.

No thought I'd meet an X-Men. You! Did you come a little closer? Thank you for your service. Tell Professor. Crash. Oh, she loves Dave Matthews. Into me. Anyway, we're gonna, we're gonna swim around you. Seed. Okay, I need to say something. Yeah, Jesus was famously posing.

Yeah, remember? post big Walk, walk, fashion, baby, work it move that bitch crazy walk Walk, fashion, baby, work it, I have Jesus baby. Baby. I'm a model and I know it. I've been listening to so much Jesus Grace superstar. I don't know why. The first one of course. What's the first one? First one, of course. Listen to Jesus. Oh, this is the one I see. Oh, I ask, is that you listen to me? I should be a female Judas. It's so catchy. It's so good. Also, if someone doesn't know the subject matter

that they're talking about, the answer that tells you that is when they say, the first one. Well, yeah, totally. I love this music. I like the first one, the third one, and the fifth one. I like everything's all right, but that first number is so good. And I listened to the John Legend one.

Oh, yeah. Brandon Victor Dixon plays Judas in the John Legend Jesus Christ superstar. And he has one of the craziest voices I've ever heard. He also played Burr and was in rent. You guys, look him up. He's the best. Oh, that's so interesting,

because the waiter I played up top that worked at the Sunrise Cafe, his name was Brandon Victor Dixon. That's so crazy, no, you name him? Hey y'all, my name's Brandon Victor Dixon. It's a great Southern name. You can just call me BVD. And then also I listen to the,

like, don't listen to, I watch the YouTube clip of Tim mentioned doing it, because I'm a huge Tim mentioned fan, but he played Judas in England and it is insanely good. That's awesome. My favorite part of that whole musical is I think it's in Simon's L.A.T. song when he just goes why should you want to know why you would love with I did and I just think about that in my mind all the time. I just love why would you why are you in love with fighting? think about that in my mind all the time. I just thought why are you in love with fighting?

JBC you made me realize with your comment a moment ago that the singer of the song hallelujah which I believe was written by Leonard Cohen and popularized by Jeff Buckley. The singer of that song doesn't know what they're talking about because they're like oh it goes like this the fourth to fifth the minor chord the major lift it's like you don't know this song fifth uh there's a minor chord no major live uh the best part about that I saw someone uh tweet that at the beginning of that uh I don't know who tweeted it but the beginning of that is um David played a secret chord that please the Lord and it's like it's a secret chord but you just listed out what it was it should have been like secret and should have been like David played a secret chord. It went up by 20 and then you got, I'm gonna do that.

That's like, so, and then, oh, back to Riddles. I was like, what the fuck is this show? What do we do? So that was a nice perk. Next one. Forward's I'm heavy, but backwards I'm not.

When am I? Forward, oh, this is, I know this. JPC, do you wanna take a stab? By the way, I got it. Uh, God, I don't know. Forward, I'm heavy, but backwards, I'm not. This is a person who skips leg day, every fucking day, you know, and they only, they're only doing chest

and shoulders, baby. I was like, see, see, they're walking around on two, spin the little sticks. Okay, JPC, you are a guy, be an adult, are your legs, and you're a guy who skips leg day, and we're begging you to not skip leg day, anymore. Wait, wait, wait, wait, no, no, no, no,

don't, don't shower, don't shower yet, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, what do you mean I'm done, I'm done working out. No, but we didn't get to do anything, we feel so weak. We just do so, look at me, oh, stand on your toes, stand on your toes, now look back at us. What do you mean I'm done I'm done working out no, but we didn't get to do anything we feel so weak Stand on your toes stand on your toes now look back at us. I can't I don't have the strength to stand up my toes Let me get on my pull-up bar. I'll pull myself up. Okay. Now I can look at my legs. I can look at you What don't do stop making your arms so strong Pay attention to us. We look like the little candy sticks from fun dip

Please work on us. I told you little mother fuckers I want you to go away. I will never I will never forgive you for tripping when we came in the door that one time But everyone left Everyone left in me. I was drunk and I said I said I'd cut back We were both drunk. I was that tired from holding your butt all day. Please make us stronger so we can hold up your butt. By the way, I don't know how you guys were both drunk because I was stoned sober.

So I must have been sitting in like an alcohol kiddie pool or something. Yeah. The absorbery got through my skin. So thin, with the pores. But you just do like one little like put like Joe something a squat maybe one squat No, I'm no way. I'm gonna make you suffer I'm gonna make you atrophy and go away until I get an apology for that one time

I tripped coming in the door. Okay, that's it. That's it. Just calm down. I'm going numb Pins and needles, pins and needles Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Wow, that is not your arms. Oh, there's two people are dicks. They're not dicks. They're arms, but they're horrible people. Yes, please. They're not people. They're arms. Please, they're not dicks. They're arms. And they're horrible people. I'm okay. Okay. Hells us. Seen. Oh, brother. Uh, do you want me to answer this one? Okay. Hells-wise. Scene. Mm-hmm. Brother.

Okay. Do you want me to answer this one? Yeah, please, go ahead. So forward, it's heavy. Backwards, it's not. This is not what you'd have. You can have a, I want you to answer it. This one is very clever.

Oh, I thought restating was answering. Ha-ha-ha. Kids go ahead and do this one's very clever. We have to do, we gotta get it because we we got to do a couple more before the word. The answer to this riddle is the word ton, T-O-N. What? Four words, it's 2000 pounds, backwards, it's literally the word, and O-T-N-O. You're incredible.

Oh. I know a word of letters three, add two, and and fewer there will be. Fewer were, wait few. Yeah, you got it. You saw it, buddy, you got it. It's huge. I thought it was take away two letters and a few. Aren't these great?

These are wonderful. Glittering points that downward thrust, sparkling spears that never rust. Still act nice. Still act nice. It's icicles. Yeah, you got it It's icicles and then the last warm up riddle at night they come without being fetched by day They are lost without being stolen

Graveyard grimmelands Go ahead I gotta say the night I got to see your band graveyard gveyard Gremlins, was so fun. You guys are great. Lots of scream singing. A lot of scream singing, and it was kinda weird that the only song you played 10 times in a row was Mariah Carey's All I Want for Christmas. Yeah, I was like, it's weird to see a scott a guy. And all that is is whatever we're having for dinner that night is I just, I say like,

looks like toasted red pepper, stuffed red peppers is back on the menu boys. That's outstanding. So yeah, go ahead, use that at your relationship, some ruined them, dinner time or a guy, that's everybody's bet you can have it now. And while you go at your relationship, so ruin them. Ditter-type or a guy, that's everybody's bet. You can have it now. And while you go ruin your relationships,

we're gonna take a quick break, so you can do just that. We'll be right back with more. Hey, Riddle Riddle. Looks like steak tartar is back on the menu, boys. You don't eat steak. No, I don't. And tartar would be the worst way to eat it.

Tartar for now. What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? Hey, GPC. Uh, uh, yeah? You're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm, um, pranking Atal.

And I'm setting up a website to prank him. Okay. Um, I just need some advice. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. I'm not mad at you. We're pranking at all. Squarespace is the only one website platform for entrepreneurs to stay in doubt and to see it online.

Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website. It engaged with your audience and said let think for products that cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms. Hey, Edel, come here. Come here, come here. Hey, what's what's going on? I actually, I want to prank JPC and I want to set up a website to prank him. Do you have anything that like is there like an online store that could set up on my website to sell products?

Did you know that with Squarespace you can have custom merch? You can easily sell custom merch and create passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production and inventory and shipping are handled for you saving you time and money. What is happening? Okay. Um, wait, what's going on with that all? Oh, nothing, nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal Squarespace website, not a prank thing. No, he's gonna shoot you. And I'm gonna use analytics.

Use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool. I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords or popular products and content on my prank website. The prank's a The prank activity. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for?

I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. Prank. Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party tools to extend the functionality of your website. Hey, JPC, hey, JPC. What's up, Vettel? edit third party tools to extend the functionality of your website. Hey JPC, hey JPC.

What's up, battle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine. Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back, she's back.

Hey Aaron. Hey, Erin. Erin, can we go to grandma's house? Wait, I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey, Adel and JPC. Thank you for meeting me in the middle of the woods here. I am sort of at an impasse. I can't decide whether or not to go this way or this way. I'm having a hard time choosing a path. You know, there never truly is a middle of the woods. Isn't it funny to think about something like that?

There never truly is a middle of the woods. No, this is the middle. Okay, this is it. Addle, can you help? Yeah, actually, so as per Robert Frost, I don't know if you know his poems. He has a poem called Better Help. I believe this is written in the 1800s,

but it still stands true today more than ever. Aaron, you should try Better Help. Have you heard of this? You seen this? Mm-hmm. Because sometimes Aaron in life were faced with tough choices, and the path forward isn't always clear.

Whether you're dealing with decisions around career relationships, being stuck in the middle of the woods, therapy helps you stay connected to what you, ow, ow, sorry, that also does so fast. Therapy helps you stay connected to what you really want while you navigate life and the woods. Mm, and better help is entirely online,

so it's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. I've been using it for several years, and it suits the way that my brain works way better than traditional therapy ever did. And when Aaron says traditional therapy, just so everyone's clear, what she means is tricking two of her friends to coming to the middle of the woods, even though there isn't truly the concept of the middle of the woods. Isn't that fun to think about?

All you have to do is just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. Hey, Aaron, GPCs putting down bread crumbs and then immediately picking them up and eating them. Dirty bread crumbs. Mm-hmm. And he's also like really into that owl

who's swooping down. Anyways, let therapy be your map with better help. Visit betterhelp.com slash ridl today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp-h-e-l-p.com-riddl. R-I-D-D-L-E. R-I-D-D-L-E, the middle of riddles a D, but there is no true middle of riddle because it would be the space in the L-I I hope you get home. Bye, baby. I am home. Who are we?

I'm clink, clink, clink. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. I just want to make a quick toast to, I know it's JPC's birthday, and we're all so excited to talk about him, but I want to talk about my favorite, my favorite thing in the world Oh, and that is the app rocket money. Oh Yeah, Aaron that's one of my favorite things as well

Mm-hmm rocket money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions Monitors your spending and helps you lower your bills all in one place I've been using it for years way before they were a sponsor and it helps me so much, especially around tax season. Clean, clean, clean, clean, clean, clean, clean, uh, uh, sorry, I also want to give a toast. Rocket money, well quickly and easily find your subscriptions

for you and for any you don't want to pay for anymore, just hit cancel and rocket money will cancel it for you. It's that easy, clean, clean, clean. It also categorizes your expenses so you can easily track your budget in real time and also get alerted if anything looks off over three million. Oh, Clint, Clint, Clint. Over three million people have used rocket money, saving the average person up to $720 a year.

We love rock and roll. Stop, Clint, Clint, Clint, stop. No, Clint, Clint, Clint, stop, click, click, click, stop. Throwing your money away, cancel unwirted subscriptions today and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rockitmoney.com slash riddle. That's rockitmoney.com slash riddle. Rockitmoney.com slash riddle, and tell them JPC's birthday got ruined

by two of his friends for doing speeches about rockit money, the website. It'll be a rocket money. It'll be a rocket money. It'll be a rocket money. Did you do it? Did you ruin your relationships? You're welcome. We hope so.

More riddles from Laura. New Jersey lawyer. More riddles from Laura. New Jersey lawyer. Have you been in a car accident? Call a New Jersey Laura. I'll catch you out of jail. I'm going to read this just so I read all of our riddles, but I think we've done this one before, but we'll just get it really quick.

Ready? What is three sevenths chicken, two thirds cat, and one half goat. Yep, chicago. We already did that one, Laura. It has terrible pizza. I never was. I'm always will be. No one ever saw me, nor ever will.

And yet I am the confidence of all who live and breathe on this terrestrial ball. Natalie Portman's acting. Wait a second. Are these by vows? Yeah, they are. Vows for what? You're not married. Yeah.

You got to start writing them early, Aaron. Done. We're going to engage. If you haven't started writing your vows yet, Aaron, you are fucked. I know. I got your vows for Mariah. Are you ready?

I'm going to make it. Hey, how are you? Thank you so much for letting me do Things bits at the dinner table like stick tarz back on the menu boys. I really appreciate your patience I love that we don't let spaghetti up on the furniture. You're my soul mate. I love you and I'll check you later These are my but yeah, I think all good vows should end with check you later I think these were her vows for me that I was here. Oh, I think all good vowels should end with check you later. I think these were her vowels for me

that I was here. Oh, I want to hear her vowels for you. Me too. Okay. It's good to see you too. I love that your suit for our wedding is a cut off tip top. Cut off.

With a little cute little tie. I wish that you would brought your family instead of a bunch of very sick ragcoons to the wedding. with a little cute little tie. I wish that you would brought your family instead of a bunch of very sick ragcoons to the wedding, but we're gathered here today for me to be with the weirdest guy that's ever lived. Oh, in my mind, a cut off tank top is a tank top with just pieces cut out.

Well, that's mesh, that's what you have. That's mesh, baby. You guys, I'm really good at guessing what people's vows are going to be. So if you ever need me to guess, Adel, if you need me to guess. Well, I told Gemma that what I'm going to do is I'm just going to put on a CD that I made. Then it's called Vows. That's what I call music. And it's just going to be a bunch of songs too. To.

Yo, because I am divorced. Yep. So. I'm going to go, because I am divorced. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep.

Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep.

Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. No, it's at the sun because you really can't look right at it But it is the thing that gives us the life It's more of like a

Don't think space I know Always will be no one ever saw me nor ever will and yet I am the confidence of all who live and breathe on this terrestrial ball Gravity No, don't think space stuff things like time hmm black holes Stephen Hawking Okay, okay, okay, okay is it polarity no think time is it hilarity? By that I mean alcohol do in swive no, okay Think time think time time gift time is it don't look at time clock in the mouth

Would it give you the time you need? I don't like you need to have light ears. I don't look at time cop in the mouth It's not the past. It's not the present It's a future. Yes, it's the future. Marnie. We have to go back Aaron why you set him up for this you said I read up in this I didn't mean I Am I listening nobody look at Adel. We have to get back my saucers.

I want to see you. No, I'm going to see a scene. Oh, we're going to see a scene where Adel. Wait a second. I was talking and you were doing, learning, learning. We're going to see a scene. Adel, you're going to be playing

Aaron and I's grandpa. And when we're, every time that we come to see you, you're always trying to give us a hook for us to come back to see you. Okay. All right, Grapefruit, this was so nice. It's great, thanks for the leftovers. It's wonderful.

We'll talk T-T-L-Y. T-T-T-L-Y. T-T-L-Y. T-T-L-Y, let me check my papers here. My calculations. Not so later, you. Oh, my calculations. P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P- That now so what where you're for now, but in the future you'll be hungry. I've seen it I've done the calculations and in the future You'll be hungry grandpa and it takes a lot to get up here you live on that big hill And it's just like we're really busy with school and stuff. Yes, of course. You're busy. That's why we have to go

snack Snack to the future you eat now and then in the future you are the hungry are you hungry of course I'm lonely your grandma is grandma you're she said the other room no she's lost in the 1800s in the wild was that what she told you oh grandpa I think you're I think you're just too much for her I think she's I think she told you that she was lost oh yeah I'm thriving here see see what I told you you have to you have to come back here in two weeks time come back and use this car the car in the garage

it's in now it's an older car it's from I think 1985 and it has two doors that swing open like like insect wings and it's called a doilorian. Grandpa, that car can't possibly still run. It's from 85, that car's at least 50 years old. It doesn't run now, but in the future, I'll take it to a minor key. Can we get you the internet? Can we get you the internet finally? I think you'd benefit from the internet. Does it run on plutonium?

Grandpa, this is really grating on our patients. Can you just tell us one more time what your net worth is? Well, listen, I'm sorry if I'm grating. You've been a great Scott and you've been a great Melissa. You're doing my favorite kids. My net worth is $1.7 billion. I don't know how this is. Okay, well hang out.

Well hang out. Well hang out. My grandpa created Texaco. Yeah, well hang out. That will re-energize us. Seed. Seed. True fact, Christopher Lloyd's grandpa created Texaco.

Three lives have I. Gentle enough to soothe the skin. Light enough to caress the sky. Hard enough to crack rocks. Is this a lini-crabbit song? Yes. And that's also the three of us. I'm gentle enough to suit the skin.

Okay. Adeled is light enough to caress the sky. And JPC is a liar who screams. Excuse me, while I caress the sky. Is this dove body wash? Yes, specifically. Dive. Women, bodies, and amazing and good. Women, bodies. Yes, stuff. Go empowerment.

Naked on a billboard. Dove. I love it. Brought to you by you, lover, the most evil corporation of the world. Does body wash, because all women should smell like live vendors. Whatever, dove. I want to see a scene, but your money where your soap is. but your money where your soap is. I want to see you seen. JPC, you are a magician, but you take a lot of shortcuts. You don't have a lot of money.

So instead of doves flying out of your suit, you have doves barsoons. Just a lot of shortcuts, you don't have a lot of money and you are really sweating on stage. Aaron, you are the one person who is shown up to this volunteer community sort of talent show and you find yourself on stages of volunteer. Alright, and for my next trick, I'm going to need a volunteer. You, a man, would you like

to come up and volunteer? Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry, you'll have to say it a little more enthusiastically. Yes, yes. Alright, alright, come on up here. Come on up here. Not for my next photo. Hi. Take off my hat. And what is your name, man? My name is Jennifer.

And my name is the middle of Jellin' Mettun. Jennifer, it's so nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. And a second, I'm going to have to ask you to reach into my hat and pull something out. But be careful not to get bitten because there is a snake in there. This is a pervert digger. No, I know that magicians do get a bad rap for that, but on the whole, it's not a pervert thing, it's just a profession thing. There's a lot of dentists are perverts, but generally speaking,

some people still get into dentistry just because they want to help people. Okay. Even though most of them do get into it because they do want to put their figures in people's backs. I feel like if you weren't a pervert, you wouldn't be talking this much about it. If I was a pervert, when I know so much about dentists, one of the most perverted pro, okay, you're right. Correct.

Alright, here we go. I'm reaching in. Oh, okay. And don't get bit by that. Rake. Now again, I, let us say bit by that rake. Now get I that is a children's rake toy that comes like a sandbox. Yeah, it's a sandbox pale. It's actually a shovel. Anyway, but you didn't get bitten and that was on my head the whole time. So that's pretty crazy how that was in there, right? Yeah, you said

little children's toy in your head under your hat. Yeah, that would have had to be the whole time though. That's pretty crazy. We cut to the next week when he's doing another act with a different volunteer. So you want me to pick a carb, any carb? Any carb. I brought my husband back with me.

That's kind of cool, huh? Hey, congratulations. He's a looker. I guess I'll say bread. What's the do you have a second choice? Uh, another carb. Do potatoes have carbs? Yes, but maybe like a third choice.

You were closer with bread. Okay, um, sliced bread, um, a bag at. Oh, man, I wasn't per cake. I wasn't prepared for any of these boy-do-I-feel Foussili. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Boy do I feel fucili. That's actually a pretty good magic trick. Thank you. Thank you. All right. Three lives have I gentle enough to suit the skin light enough to caress the sky hard

enough to crack rocks. So hard enough so is this water again? Is it like water ice cream crack rocks and I got it. And then like vapor or Mr. would he call water when it turns against? Rain. Rain. Rain. Rain, man.

Rain, man. Steam. When young I am sweet in the sun. When middle aged I bring joy. When old I am more valued than ever. Grapes. Yes. ever. Grapes. Yes. Yeah.

Grapes turn to raisins which turn into wine in your mouth when you chew raisins, which is why kids should drink more raisins. Why is it they're more raisin flavored wine? I don't know. I want to see a scene. I want to see a scene. Oh, go ahead. Oh no, I just wanted to say so my, the funniest part of my new apartment, which has a lot

of funny things in it, is there's a random wine fridge that's installed. No place to put the trash. No, obvious place to put trash, but there's a wine fridge. And so I was like, maybe I should get really into like, I'm not a wine drinker. I don't know anything about wine, I never drink it. So if you know, like, what should I do?

Like, if anyone's a wine expert out there, if we have any Somali A's listening, I like natural wines, because I get rashes from wine, so help a girl out, make me a genius. I think it's so funny that like, apartments and houses that come on the market that have like idiosyncratic things,

like wine fringes in them, but don't have like a dishwasher is the most unhinged thing, because it just means at one point either the owner or the Occupant was like I'm a wine guy I'm such a wine guy that I'm valuable living space is gonna be converted into be storing my wine like a psycho I know I'm gonna probably just fill it with the croise, but it would be kind of cool if I had some Like cool wines. You should go to Trader Joe's and get those,

whatever the Trader Joe brand sparkling water is that comes in the long bottles. Yeah, and just keep those inside of there instead of wine. I'm a Somali D plus it best. Let's do, I wanna see a scene. JPC, you're at a new wine bar in town and you're very new to wine

and so you're just trying something out. You heard that they have raisin wines. You're checking out this interesting new flavor profile. Aaron, you are the Somali A at this wine bar. You know, A everything about wine and all the funky new flavors that this bar contains. Yeah, I mean, so I guess, you know, I don't like it. Yeah, I'm welcome. Welcome into the wine bar. Hello. Yeah, we were made conversation. Oh, no, I guess I welcome and to the wine bar. Hello. Yeah, we were made conversation.

Oh. No, I guess I just want to, you ask me if I was a wine person, but no, I don't really think that I'm a big wine person. It's just that it's so hard to meet people organically in your 30s that I just kind of wanted to come and go. Organically. Organically. Organically.

Organically. Organically. Organically. Organically. Organically. Organically. Organically. Organically. wine. Hi, I'm Patricia. Be sommelier today. Okay, you said your name was Rachel. That's what your name tags says. I look. Why? Are you okay? Yeah, one eye is closed because I'm a broken porcelain doll not because I drunk. Okay, I forgot, I did wine tasting. Forget you spitted to bucket. Because I played football in high school and you sounded a lot like you've been concussed, and I was very familiar with people that had been concussed.

You're so pretty. You don't like don't let anyone tell you you shouldn't be confident. Okay, no. Ah, it's hot in here, huh? No one's ever told me that. Hey, can I just say? Give another bottle open and then just say,

what? I'm drunk, everyone in here is drunk. We're all acting way different than you're acting it feels like you have a specific injury Okay, I may have had a couple of steps of wine ran right into huge door That's it hold on let's focus on that part because you have blood trickling down your ears Yes, so this is for sure a full body red. So I just want you swirl this around. Give it a little sniff. I'm honestly worried about your full body's red because it's leaking out of your head right now.

Pino Grigio. Sparkling Rose. And then cold white wine. Why did you whisper that into my ear? Like it was a secret that you were sharing with me. Hey, Shardinay. Hey, sorry today. Hey, look, hey, look, I never do this. I'm New Zealand.

I never do this with someone that worked, but what time do you get off? Because I would love to take you to a hospital. Yeah, stay. See. I love the Somaliai. Just whispering in your ear. New Zealand. New Zealand.

Yellowtail. Yellowtail. Yellowtail. Here's what I'll say. I've had many of me with wine pairings, so it's like these wines are customized for you to bring out the maximum flavor, and I drink them in a moment. This could be, these all taste the same, these are just wines. I enjoy port, I enjoy like port, I enjoy like brandy or I mean like mall back or any sort of like sparkling wine. So I feel like if it's weird or funky I enjoy it, but if it's just red or white I can't tell any of the flavors. Yeah, I also completely lost my sense of smell. So I can't, I doubt that I'll ever truly be able to enjoy wine. I when I order drink, it's basically just the spiciest margarita that can get me.

Otherwise, I will not feel it tasted or know that I'm drinking anything. I feel like when we were in Arizona, did you order spicy margarita? Yeah, I probably did. I think that's... How would you know margarita or something? That's my go-to. When we went out of the... One of my favorite things about our friendship is we were in Kalamazoo, was it Kalamazoo?

And we went back to the same Tiki bar twice in 15 hours. It was amazing. I know we were so happy. We were like, should we go back? And we were so, we like got so obsessed with the staff there. And we like, they, we talked their ear off. We ordered like a million drinks and ate so much food, but it was.

And JBC, you'll be happy to know that we met an actual billionaire Yeah, no, I you've heard this story before and believe it or not on this podcast Sorry, we had fun, but I think I ordered a spicy drink there and it was like the best thing that I got there I love spicy marks I'm gonna give everyone my quick spicy margarita recipe. I will let, if you get a clear tequila, and then you put some jalapenos in it, and you let it sit for a little bit, like a couple days.

And then you strain it out. You put like a raw bunch of fresh lime juice in it, a little bit of fresh grapefruit juice, over ice, and then you're gonna pour like a lime lacroy in it, and then you're gonna put the Trader Joe's chili lime sauce on the around the edge, and it's absolutely delicious. Put it in a cool cup. Can I actually do mine?

Is that okay? Do we have time? So my recipe for spicy margarita, what you're gonna do is you're going to take clear tequila, some lime juice. You're going to put that in a blender with some hot jardinera. You're going to put that on puree. You're going to put in your favorite glass and you're going to zest some cinnaburst on

top just to give it a final little click. And if we have a little bit of time, I would like to go through my recipe for spicy margarita. Here's what you're going to do. Go to any bar with a friend, make sure you order them a margarita. Then when the margarita comes, say, oh my God, is that berry pepper? They'll look over to see if it's berry pepper. What you do is you take a big handful of black pepper, dump it in their margarita, wait for them to turn around, they take a sip, they get mad, you get a fist fight with the Bard Tender? That's a knife. Barry Pepper's an actor I haven't thought about in 15 years.

That's why it works. That's why it works. Because he could be there. Barry Pepper could be there. And speaking of Christopher Lloyd's grandpa founding taxicote, I believe Barry Pepper's grandfather started MGM studios. I believe he's such a pepper.

That's right. He started started pepper. He was in the military. You guys say such nonsense all the time, I never know what's real. Alright, if you have three, you have three. If you have two, you have two. But if you have one, you have none. What is it? I love this riddle. Nah, a sexual partner. What? If you have three, you have three. If you have two, you have two. If you have one, you have three you have three if you have two you have two if you have one you have none

You have one you have none If you have three you have three Two you have two if you have four do you have four Aaron? Yep, if you have five you have five. Yeah, keep going in forever. You have ten you have ten. Yeah Okay, but if you have one you have none so this be, so this is something that maybe comes in more than one. So this is going to be... Your hint is this is maybe my favorite riddle we've had at least this year. And here is the answer to this riddle a Twix Bar.

Yeah, baby boy! Do you believe that? Yeah, baby boy, yeah! It's a Twix Bar! I will say this is a little insight into my sick brain, but if I'm going to make breakfast and I open up the egg carton and there's one egg, I get furious and I might throw it out,

I don't even use it, because I need at least two or three eggs to make an omelet. So, if I have... You know what makes me mad is when I open the egg carton and it's just one Twix bar. What the fuck happened here? What are this chicken eat? I hate when I go to grab the box of oatmeal

or the box of oatmeal, but yeah, like the carton that the oatmeal comes, but you can't see through it, and you open it up and it's just full of eggs in there. It's like, it's like, replace it. You need a twix bar in here, idiots. Hey, I got a question for you too,

who in both of you live with partners. Let's say that there's whatever is that is, you know, the hot commodity in your house. You know, for Aaron, it's a gallon of milk. For Adelaide's probably a gallon of milk. But like something that you can't see through. So like a non-seathor thing. What would you do? Would you, if you were like pouring yourself a glass of something and there was just like, not maybe more than a sliver, enough for someone to have like half a glass left.

Would you put it back in the thing, or would you like leave it out? Would you pour a glass for your partner? Like how would you handle, how would you resolve that situation? It's a really interesting question. I would 100% drink X amount a few ounces and then dump the rest in so I could throw out the box.

Because mentally, as I go out throughout the rest of my day, I'm going to be mentally locked into the idea that there's a thing I have to throw away fairly soon and that's going to ruin my day. It's like, it's like during, I mean, this is I'm sure everyone during quarantine. If I have a call at like 8 p.m. and I have nothing else the whole day, all I do all day is be like, I got this call at 8. Like I should go for a walk at noon, but I can't go for a walk at noon. I just call it eight. It totally occupies my entire mental capacity. I feel that so much. That's how I think about our recording

days. I genuinely, they are pretty useless to me. I go like, yeah, I would do laundry, But I really should just check on my internet for the six hundred times. I'm speaking of doing laundry I'm speaking of doing laundry You know for we're recording today and we I was washing all the dog beds in the dog towels in the house And we had like three hours before recording so enough time to wash this load of laundry So I asked Mariah I put them down there I asked her if she would go would go downstairs and like change them over. And then she did. And then 10 minutes before we recorded,

she goes, what do you want to do about the laundry? And I go, what do you mean, like, what do you mean do about the laundry? Because we can't do it during the recording because you'll hear it through the floor. I was like, what do you mean do about the laundry? And she goes, oh yeah, I started on the load. And I was like, well, I guess what I want to do

is go back in time to when you did that and have you not do it. I don't, it's not really a good thing I can solve with 10 minutes of horror I guess we rewatched that But we were both laughing about it But I just thought it was so funny to come up to someone be like hey, what do you want to do about this problem? It shouldn't be a problem It's not your problem

But erud, what would you do with what would you do with the thing in your fridge? the 10% left. I'm always putting half eaten, like, little bits of things left. But if it's a shared, a carton of something, I would, as loudly as I could, be like, hey, there's only a little bit left of this, and then hope that he heard me. I think that this is a pretty like common ADHD thing that I'll start like a LeCroix or drink or like an energy drink or something. That's an individual can and I'll put it in there

and be like, I'll finish the rest later. The narrator says she never went back to finish that. And so Sean just like opens our refrigerator and it's like cans of nonsense that I've completely forgotten about. Aaron, you've just described the daughter from, what's that? I'm on science. Yeah. Oh yeah. I'm leaving glasses of water on the house. Just in case my bedside table is three glasses of water minimum all the time always. For aliens. Yeah. I'm the king of going into the fridge

and drinking anything that's open. Cause I'm like, chances are someone's forgotten about this. It's either me who does not remember putting it in there or it's a briar who didn't remember putting it in there. But I, it doesn't matter, I'll go and finish it. I'll just, I did that with a can of cold brew earlier today. I was like, I don't know who this is, but it's going down in my go.

It's fine now. Yeah, if anyone needs half a beverage, come on over. I'll let you in. You can drink all my half beverages. But I'm with Adel if there's 10% less than the thing, I'm housed in it. I'm taking it right to the fucking dome. I'm not even pouring it in my drink,

drink some out of my glass. I'll just drink it right out of the bottle and then throw that away. But it's not staying in there. So my mom saw me. I'll crack it in my mouth. Oh, you. My mom saw me do that with Apple cider when I was homeless

because I just finished the end of it. She was like, oh, I was like, mom, stop. Right. Okay, so Adel, did you know this, the answer to this, or did you just know that it's like five equals five and 40? Oh my god, I'm just remembering that I did that and then put it back in the refrigerator.

Wait, was the answer eggs? Wait, wait, hold on, Aaron, you did it to actually finish the apple cider? You just took a big swig on the apple cider and then your mom was like, I know, I know, you guys, I'm really sorry, my mom was completely correct. That's the exact opposite of that situation. What you did was a gross thing. I'm so excited, I'm so excited thing. Oh man I'm the worst and I just threw my mom under

the bus. She's the best woman alive. Oh god I'm an idiot. I remember this is a vivid memory I have in college where I was pouring tomato like a pasta sauce out of a jar but I wasn't using all the pasta sauce and I like poured it out and there's pasta sauce on the rim of the jar and I just like licked it off and and then put the thing back and put it in the fridge, and then got it out like three days later, and that spot that I was licked was like covered and mold, because the bacteria in my mouth had put mold all over that thing, and it's like, oh, this is why people don't do that.

This is why you don't see chefs on TV licking shit. Put it in. Yeah, that's right. I was like, because I do little swigs of apple cider vinegar. And it's bad for your teeth shut the fuck up. I don't care. Nobody said it. No, everybody said it.

Everyone, I'm talking about the listeners. That's bad for your teeth. I know, but it helps my throat and it helps my belly. But I was taking swigs right from the container and then I was like, that's not good. It is bacteria. And I don't think that anymore. I do want to see a scene. This will be a quick one. So JPC and Aaron you host a cooking show. You are the popular duo the negligent chefs and you just do a lot of stuff that shouldn't be done for

health and safety protocols. Hi and welcome back from the break. If you're just joining us we're making pizza. Oh okay well scrap these pancakes then because this is wrong this is all wrong. And when you discard pancakes you're gonna want to open your pantry and you're gonna shove them right in the back and hope for the best okay. And that's just a little kitchen tip from us. So they're safely locked away in the pantry now we are gonna be making pizza today. So what do we need from pizza? Well, unfortunately, we do need some of the stuff we threw away last segment

So let's crack open that trash can and search around here for a little while. What is this the pepperoni? Yeah, that's tough. You smell it. I'll taste it Nope, nope, it's not it's not who's to say what that is. I'll say what this is. Oh here's the cheese I'm just gonna disinfect that with some bleach, because you know safety first. Safety first. Oh, safety first. Karen, have we washed our hands today?

Yes, we should probably dirty them up. Yes, okay. Before I get going. I have not washed my hands today, but I took a shower and a shampooed. And so that kind of ran off onto my fingers, I believe, that kind of covers me. Best, just quickly dirty him up anyway, you see fit.

Mm-hmm. And again, you can do whatever you want. Do you need me to pick yours? Sure. Okay, there you go. And for everyone watching at home, it is critical to the recipe. If, from last segment, that pig is still loose in your kitchen,

just try to grab it when it comes by. Don't try to make a big thing of it and like try to corner it because it's not going to respond to that. But if it gets near you because it's curious, do try to still grab that pig. And you know what that ding means? No. The fire that we started in the other part of the house

is about to reach us. OK, so our producer, Glenn, is telling us that it is now time to get on our flame-retarded suits. So we're gonna put those on. On? Okay. And? I found, I found where we put the honey.

Oh, it was on the side. And I found the pebroni. Okay, two more riddles. We're going to do these riddles and then we're last to leave. Oh, wait, did we get the, was egg the right answer to the, no. Do we get that one? No, you didn't get it. If you have three, you have three. If you have two, you have two. If you have one, you have none. What is it? Can we get a hint? How would I give you options? Okay. I guess the answer could be this or it could be this. Be it giving you, yes, choices, it's a choice.

That's so good. That's great. A four letter, and this is a new one. I've moved on past that. I forget it. That's the difference. So this isn't the one that we just got. Nope, we're moving on already.

So quickly, a four letter word always done tomorrow. We're out of tea, the ultimate sorrow. Without the eye, you owe me money. No sugar, no nectar, no sweetness, no honey. A four-letter word, if by chance you choose, you can never win, you can only lose. Was that all one riddle? Or was that a series of...

Okay. So it's me yelling nonsense words. It is a four-letter word. It's one four-letter word that we're looking for. Yeah, a four-letter word always done tomorrow. We're out of T the ultimate sorrow. Without the eye, you owe me some money. No sugar, no nectar, no sweetener, no honey.

A four-letter word, if by chance you choose, you can never win, you can only lose. And this thing is stupid and dumb. Is it brew? It's a four-letter word with an I in it. So we know that much, right, Aaron? Yeah. Uh-huh.

Without the I, you owe me money. So if you owe me money, that's death. And there's a T Uh huh. Without the I you owe me money. So if you owe me money that's debt. And there's a T in it. It's an I. So what's a four litre word? Okay. Well wait. Yeah.

So we're looking for a three litre word that means you owe me money. No it's yeah. Yeah. Yeah because without the I. But it's not quite spelled like that but it sounds like it. Hmm. Huh. So debt would sounds like it. Mmm. Huh, so debt would be D-E-T?

Yeah. So, diet. Yep. It's diet. Nice one. Always tomorrow. Salad tomorrow. Unless you're doing it for allergy health reasons, diets

are stupid. You're perfect the way you are. You're a pervert the way you are. You're a pervert. Hey, and we stand by that. You're a pervert the way you are. And we are perverts. Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum. Don't let diet culture take all

your money and your joy. All right. And those are all of our riddles from Laura. Thank you so much Laura. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. And anything to plug. Yeah. I want to plug a few things. One, I want to say that you should all watch the movie Wolf Walkers. It's an animated Irish film that's absolutely beautiful. It's gorgeous to look at. The music's stunning. The voice acting is stellar. The story is wonderful. So check out Wolf Walkers. I believe it's on Apple TV. That is how that's pronounced. Appledive. So please check that out. It's a wonderful movie. The other thing I want to plug, oh, and I just lost it. Oh, is audio daddy. Casey Tony is hilariously close to 3000 followers on Twitter. So please follow him at Casey Pony,

P-O-N-E-Y. So it's like Casey Tony, but a P instead of the T, at Casey Pony, please follow him on Twitter. And let's get audio daddy up to 3k Shall we? And if you like Hintime memes, you're really gonna like that follow that's gonna be a really good follow for you because that is basically all it is Something that I would like to plug is a game that I'm Probably pretty close to done with playing on on stream So if you haven't played it, you can definitely check it out. It's a disco elicium that I'm probably pretty close to done with playing on stream. So if you haven't played it,

you can definitely check it out. It's a disco elicium. I've really, really enjoyed it, and it's a very, very fun game, especially if you're into kind of like, it's not like a combat-oriented game, it's more like storytelling, but the dialogue is really good,

the voice acting is really fun. So I give that my endorsement. Go check out it. Oh, Casey just beat it. So check out disco elic Alicia, and maybe follow him at Casey Pony if you wanna see some like Hintai about that. Is JBC, I might be dumb. Is that a spinoff of Disco County, Jr.?

Yes. Not to your question, too, that I might be dumb. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Aaron, anything that you want to plug? Sure. My improv team, Webbus, is doing lots of fun in-prep show and hangout and video games streams on Twitch. So if you want to follow us where Web underscore bus,

they are my favorite people in the world. They're so, so funny. So if you don't want to go for me, go for the weight-rubbed and bullied and so on. Hayley Palmer, Raina Kasky, Harrison Lodge, on coils of it all. You don't need to come from me. Wow, she forgot two names. Did I?

Really, really a sexist here. A list? It really sucks to hear a list of your favorite people of the world. I don't think you're allowed to name. I think I said all the six other people on Weapons. Well, you forgot one big name. Maybe the biggest name in the universe. I really swan of them.

I believe it's her, so it's a J. Sighs. Adel and JPC? No, that's her today. This is where boys go to get more stupider. Justice. Yes, close. Janitor.

Uh-huh. Jupiter. Bye forever. She got there Hey there, charts and farts. If you like that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. We go back to our top songs to the 2000s with another thing that is not named that tune. You can listen to that plus our entire Batcadilog at patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or the review crew for $8 a month.

See you there!