Hey Riddle Riddle - #192: Irish Riddles

Episode Date: March 23, 2022

Today we have some listener submitted Irish Riddles-just in time to be late for St. Patrick’s Day! What’s more Irish than Adal telling us about a game he invented while we was high. This episode also has a spooky garden, a terrible doctor, and a fun new character for JPC. Don’t tell us how bad our Irish accents are-we already know baby! Starring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Editing by:  Casey Toney Theme by:  Arne Parrott Logo by:  Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a captain speaking, we should have a smooth flight. We will be heading to riddles in just a smooth flight. We will be heading to riddles in just a moment here. We'll be clear for takeoff. If you look out the window to your left on our flight, you will see some puzzies and out the right, you will see riddles our destination. About half way through our flight, we will stop for some ads, but after that it should be smooth sailing. In regards that we will crash the plane into water and pick up a sailboat and sail to our destination. Are there any questions before we take off?

This is Captain speaking. The shift manager at a long-john silvers, everybody calls me the captain. I have a question for the captain of the airplane if that's okay. Go for captain. Again, this is another captain speaking. I'm just wondering when you say that we're going to crash into water, is this going to be a water landing or will this be a plane crash? Great question, captain.

This will be a plane crash, but there should be a pretty good high chance of survival. And this is your captain speaking. We are so sorry. Two teens have gotten the hold of our sound system. We should be killing, but not killing. Do something to stop them. Sorry, but not. This is your captain speaking. Everyone put a finger in your butt. This is your captain speaking again, not the captain of the plane just a captain of a long-像 stillfers. I got my finger in my butt and there is a teen sitting next to me who handed me this control and they are laughing at me. Just wanted to ask if that is normal.

And this is the captain of the plane speaking and I just wanted to tell you to put a finger up your belt. And I'm hanging riddle riddle. And I'm at a finger. And I'm J P. S finger. And we're hanging riddle riddle up improvised podcasts about riddies and puzzies. Sometimes. Yeah. Yeah, sometimes it's this weather episode. Sometimes it's the Sherlock Holmes episode for a long time ago. I guess it's the best episode.

I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode.

I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. I guess it's the best episode. last five years on our fifth year anniversary, we should change the podcast to, hey, riddle so that we're lessening expectations by 50%.

Wow. Yes, Addle. Because that second riddle is really, it really emphasizes and laminates the fact that we're doing riddles. And I feel like we're not holding up that end of the bargain. I got a pitch for you. What if instead we just call it,, Rinal Rinal and then that two minute bit that we do at the top of every show can be a 20 25 minute bit. I love it.

You're a bitch strike. And then it's and then it's good. Oh, good. Okay. Oh boy. And my pitch is just calling it hey, sorry. Sorry. One.

Hey, sorry. And that we're having a ball and you won. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Hey, sorry. Sorry. And that we're having a ball, and you won. You know it would be fun to listen to one day. I'll get around to it. Going back in time and listening to little episode one, Adel. He had spenders, he had a glint in his eye. He was happy as a clam, and he said, we're calling it, hey, we're going real.

Describing false lin in so far. He was singing the song Bernadette, Navi's child. He was saying, hey, hey, with Chevy Chase, wearing big suits and talking to Lord Michaels. No, so you had this Clinton you're eye and you said, hey, I know that we're also doing puzzles and lateral thinking problems and improv and other such things. But I like the name Hayr l'Riddle because it has a little ring to it and it's like the little children's poem and we're like, yeah, people will love it. They'll totally get it. And then immediately people are like, where the riddle?

Um, nom nom. I need more riddles. Obviously, I love that phrase. I'm nom nom. Speaking of music, you know what song I heard at the airport and I went Is this a song that Haydwell Riddell references all the time? Why is it top of mine? Also the song is amazing Wait, what who sings that it's not The blue thing, right? I don't think so. Oh, is that blue straver?

Look it up. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. Yeah, it is a really, it is a princess vibes, which is why I thought I maybe hear a little reference to it all the time. Sister Hazel must have been one of those one hit wonder bands because I, I'm you saying that I'm like, yep, that is it. It's Sister Hazel,

but now I'm like, I don't know any of their other songs. No. God, I miss one hit wonder bands. I felt like it was a specific quirk of the music industry at that time that we would develop those one hit wonder bands. I feel like we just do it less and less now. I want to start going, when those one hit wonder bands come to town,

I want to start going to their concerts and just hear the one song and then leave. Like, I don't know if you know this JPC, but Popper Roach is coming to somewhere in Indiana that's not too far away and I'm like you would be really fun to go with JPC the Go see Papa Roach, listen to last resort and then just fuck off and do anything else. What if they do it last? This could be a really big mistake. Uh oh, thank God I'm here. Addle. Nope. No, no, no, no. I'm just grabbing his hand, taking the tickets out of his hands. It's not the same thing at all,

because it's not a one hit wonder thing, but my dad keeps going to see Alice Cooper concerts. And I mean, my dad's 70, and Alice Cooper's older than that. He's definitely older than that. And I'm like, wow, it's so funny that my dad, who, I think Alice Cooper was maybe one of his early concerts, is still going to see Alice Cooper shows. I'm like, that's fun as hell.

I'm trying to imagine, I'm trying to imagine what a band of comparable age to me that I will still be listening to when I'm also 70. And I was like, I think it'll be like, assuming that. I said, well, dude, they, they just legit, they will never stop making four albums a year. That's what I'm saying. They make a lot of music. They're never gonna stop touring ever.

I think Taylor Swift is. They're not giving up. Taylor Swift is my age. We make, she makes a ton of music. I'm like, there's a good chance that at seven years old, Taylor Swift is still making a ton of music. Oh, I think so. They do.

That would be a fun, if I'm like retired, I'm never gonna retire, obviously. I'm never gonna give up on weasel. I would, I would be a fun if I'm like retired. I'm never gonna retire. Obviously. I'm never gonna give up on we I I would I would follow Taylor Swift at 70 in concert. It would become like a fish situation We'd all like look at each other's like scrapbooks and like hug each other and yeah talk about our lives and like parking lot beforehand No, what I love what I love specifically about my dad, your Alice Cooper, is I don't feel like Alice Cooper is the biggest name, you know?

So it's like, it is funny to be like, this feels like, this feels like a failed in Alice Cooper could have a relationship of like, yeah, you're the guy who keeps coming to my concerts. Great, good for you. But yeah, for Taylor Swift, I'd be like, no, she's like a mega celebrity. She's never gonna get to the point where someone's like,

yeah, you wanna go to the Taylor Swift concert? $20 and it's Thursday night. I have that similar thing where I'm like, I can't think of a good example of like, you know, radio hit or something. I'm like, there's no illusion where I'm ever gonna meet them or know them. But then there's people like Dr. John

where I'm like, I could easily talk to Dr. John early. I mean, I think he's dead now, but I feel like there's easily, we G board anyone. Yeah, everyone. But it is funny in my head to be like, there's a certain level of fame where I'm like, I could be friends with them easily. Yeah, I think that, I mean, that's,

I just think it's true because they have less fans and you're one of the fans. So the math works out. What else? She says looking down at her riddles, wanting to avoid them. Well, we did the hay. We did the hay part. So we should get to one of the riddles and then after the break, we can do the second riddle.

We actually, we kind of did like the hay part. And then we had like a, I don't know, 10, 15 second coffee, then we did more hay, where it would have been like an opportunity to take some water and just move on with the show, but I love. I love how we got the Alice Good Bread by Dad stuff in there. Oh, stop a mind. I just, I figured out what I wanted to say earlier. Aaron, you were talking about what this song is and I, I wrongly guessed who'd eat in the blowfish. I was having a conversation this weekend at the cabin,

we were at my bachelor party and it was, we were sitting around the fire. Aaron, I think you were there, but I discovered that hooting the blowfish song titles are basically just Beatles song titles. Oh, I wasn't there for that. The Beatles have, I want to hold your hand. Who in the blowfish have hold my hand?

Hold my hand or hold your hand. Hold my whole. There's two other ones by camera what they were whereas like they just ripped off the Beatles and no one I mean everyone rips off the Beatles yeah I felt like I solved it for me true I felt like I saw some great at all I was hot yeah okay that mystery solved itself very quickly did it I was like holy shit every who to get the blowfish title that he's you get old to remember what oh

The other one was it was let it be let it be and then who you blowfish also have is it let it be Let it know they also have a notice on that similar to let it be it's not Straight straight if the title is let it be addos thinking of let it be by the Beatles Let it be by the Beatles. Is it a cover? Do they do a cover? Let it be by the Beatles. Let's come back to this. Put a pen in this.

Yeah, get high again, and then we'll fall back to this. Hold on, I take issue with that we have to come back to this. Can't we just let this one go? No. OK, don't put a pen in it. Let it fall through the floor. I won't. And we'll slip on it later.

When you're high, you'll remember. You will. OK, so everything doing this is real. Yeah, we gotta do this, Aaron. It's Riddle City, baby. I feel like last time it was your time to be Dr. Puzzles or whatever you call it, I feel like you made us do all puzzles with no, all riddles with no improv. I did like 70 riddles and I was exhausted by the end of it. I had to lay down for a week. Couldn't get out of bed. I

Addle here you go ready sickly. Yes, only want to be with you. What's the Beatles? What's the Beatles song? Let it be the bathroom window. Are you are you hearing the word be good? You're like yep, be to be Business a business software. Okay. What about this would let her cry letter cry I love this I said the name of the song and you just sing it to the tune of another Beatles Aaron Aaron I'm talking to you with only my brain. I fucked up That would be cry baby cry by the Beatles Hannah Jane singing at the dinner. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no revolver. Bang bang Maxwell's Silver time. Only lonely. Sometimes. Something. Only. Wait, no. For no one. The lonely people. Who sings that song?

The Beatles. That's Eleanor Rigby. Eleanor Rigby. So only lonely is Eleanor Rigby. Love it. The lonely people would do. So only lonely is elder rick be God okay, goodbye Hello You say goodbye and we say all right one more one more good night That brings us things this is the last one that we'll do for this get out of my mind Get back star. Get back. There's something. There is something there. Oh, a friend of mine, who's a who is a legit rock star. Okay. He messaged me to the day and I had I'd never noticed this. He realized that tax man by the Beatles is almost the exact same riff if not the same riff from Batman. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun CPA like a local you know late at night ad spot for a CPA.

And then he comes into the frame from the side. I've been wanting to kind of fun. He's got like a Batman costume. But it's like it's one of the ones that you would buy it for like, you know, $20 at a Halloween party supply store. Yeah, it's way too tight. Some some people think numbers are boring, but I think they're a super hero. I'm a tax man. He goes, let me crunch your numbers while biting into a

Nestle Crunch. It's a lot of layers to this. It doesn't air. It's a perfect. It's a tax perfect. Well, speaking of doesn't air. She provided doesn't air. Aaron, what is our first riddle? Our theme for today are riddles that I saved that I didn't end up having time for in other episodes. I don't think that's a theme. It is. Yeah, it's like calling the theme for your dinner like going to be hungry. Interesting. Interesting. Interesting.

Stephen King has a new book out and the theme is, I wrote this. And just in time for St. Patrick's Day to be, many days ago, I have some Irish riddles from an Irish listener. The theme for my high school private, I'll never forget it, it was children dancing. Okay, that would be a very funny theme. The theme for my high school probably I'll never forget it was children dancing

Okay, that would be a very funny theme and then I would think those kids were funny, so you're joking, but that is good Oh, that's damn it I didn't mean to do a good joke god damn it now. I'm just you're such a dipshit that it loops back around to awesome you overshoot It'll land back and helpful all right um okay what an errand what are the aird is holding up our phone right now is like okay the theme for this episode is we're gonna do this riddle the way that the riddle works is you have to pick a five-letter word and you have to guess it and then I'll tell you which and we're just doing Aaron's word. Oh, thank you. Clevver girl. Okay. Hello, Adol, JPC and Aaron. Listener from Ireland here. My name is Shane Groast. You can say my name

on the podcast. Thank you, Shane. Aaron, can I, can I suggest something that you feel free to tell me JPC, this is not something I'm willing to do. Not if you're gonna make fun of his name. Nope, don't wanna make fun of his name. We never make fun of shame, gross, snable, whatever it is. But when it's a listener from Ireland, would it be nice if you read it in a little Irish accent? Just not, not like a cartoon, art stars and rainbows. But just like, maybe we'll look like a picky fucking blind egg.

What on earth are you doing? Hello, Adel Aaron. Adel, JPC and Aaron. Listen ever, I can't do it. No, no, the Irish national folklore collection. Recognizing that many aspects of traditional Irish life in folklore have been lost following the Great Famine of the mid 1800s and subsequent mass emigration to the US and elsewhere, the government set up the Irish folklore commission in 1935 to record as much first-hand information from the eldest generation of Ireland. I didn't know this, I think it's super interesting. That's fantastic. Also, Irish folklore commission sounds magic.

Yeah. Their office door was a portal to a magical world, am I wrong? In Dublin, I went to, I think it's like the Leopardcon museum or something, and there's like a lot of folklore in there, and there's a lot of like, there's like a chair that's like 50 feet tall and stuff. I mean, Ireland's having fun. They're having a lot of fun.

Way more fun than we're having. Thought that was super interesting. This is why I'm reading the whole email. That's great. One of the ways they accomplished this was to establish the school's collection where Irish schoolchildren asked questions to their grandparents, parents, and neighbors

about how life in Ireland used to be. Approximately 740,000 pages of folklore and local tradition were compiled by pupils from 5,000 primary schools in the Irish Free State between 1937 and 1939. These are being digitized in our free-to-read online. Topics including oral history, topography, folklorism legends, proverbs, games, pastime trade, crafts, and most importantly, riddles. Riddles. Tyna Cool. This sounds nice and innocent and everything,

and it sounds delightful because it's Ireland, but if you're a kid and you're listening to the show, I cannot advise you enough. Do not ask your grandparents how it was when they were kids, because guess what? Never gonna be that way anymore, and we don't really wanna know how it was. What I was your hey, John.

While you're reading that, I had a flash in my brain for a phenomenal stroke. Is that what you're calling it? Why won't I, it doesn't work anymore. I had a flash in my head of, I think what would be a really good name for an Irish whiskey. What is it? Pete and Pete.

But it's spelled differently. Differently than like a Pete bog? No, that's okay. Okay. I like it. I'll give you $40. Sorry, the adventures of Pete and Pete. Isn't Pete, isn't like Pete,

isn't like a Pete bog, isn't it stinky? No, it's like smoky. When they put Pete and Whis Scotch it becomes smokey. Oh cool. I don't know that Mm-hmm. All right. Well then I like the name even more now. No, I wish your name was Pete moss who dated Fuck that's the supermodel Pete. Yeah, he's fading you guys Let's go back to your nap adult. It's okay Your word is done. Pete Dordy dated Kate Moss and so they should have been called Pete Moss. Maybe they were. I've said it to you a thousand times, you can let some of this go. You don't need to keep

this information in your head. I give you permission. It is so progressive. I mean, for a guy to take a woman's name when they're dating, that is here. You can call me Pete Moss. That's too forward. There are pages and pages of riddles. I went through a few pages and included the most common ones I came across repeatedly, including some that probably only made sense 100 years ago. If you guys like these, I could very easily compile many, many more. Enjoy. And those are, that's from Shane. So thank you, Shane, for giving me all that information. I think that's so interesting and fun and I love that background. Thank you Shane. Shane I'm still under you a traditional Irish blessing. Thank you. Wow. And in in in Gaelic. That's beautiful. Perfect Gaelic. Perfect Gaelic.

All right. As round as an apple as plump as a ball can climb over a church steeple and all I love this one Okay, all right you win mercy. I give up church apple. Church apple climbing church apple white flag It's an all-ironist classic climbing church apple Yeah, it's a part a what do you mean parlay? church tackle. Yeah, it's a part. What do you mean, part lay? We need a monkey. I want to see a scene. Is it from parts of the character? I hope so. We can just do part of the care of being equal to if you need to. I would

as you're seeing, JPC, you are father, John, you are, you're teaching at a, like a Catholic school. Aaron, you and I are the students and JPC, you are teaching us that apples are the devil. Apples are evil. I know a lot of people take my class because it's, it doesn't hurt my feelings, but they say it's a blow off class. No. It's okay, it's okay. It's a... The class is important because the categorism is one of our oldest and most sacred documents. It's good that everyone's in a while.

Excuse me, Father. Yes, Father, yes. You actually knew that your confidence... He's in? Oh. That... You... We knew that your confidence. You've sinned. Oh, uh, that, uh, you, we knew that your confidence was a little low. So we brought you a traditional gift that you give a teacher. Here's a shiny red apple. Oh, the devil with you. What? Pardon? I should

have read headed girl into this class. Oh, my God. Oh, red heads are evil or gifts are evil. That's all of it together it together doesn't really help But what takes it open up the window here and it chuck it Didn't really suck it very far did I got it kind of went behind you that was so sad I'm okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry How dare you how dare you bring an apple into this class after I can still see it and I'm thinking about it How is it out of sight out of mine? How could you see it? It's bright right with I can't see it. Do you color blind? I?

Mean you should still see the apple even if you can't see red we don't need to stuff Well, there's a lot of little balls all over the ground I got I got a mr. Baku by the end here today balls all over the ground. I got a I got a Mr. Baku by the way in here today. Slip it on tennis balls and I'm hungry and I'm bored by this lesson. I'm just gonna open up my mott's apple sauce and the devil puree. How dare you break the devil's puree here. You know what apple sauce is boy? The devil's puree? Yes. Oh yes. Can we take a guess? Yeah, I thought you absolutely could take a guess. That's what teaching is all about. Let's excuse the answer to the wrong question.

Is it because they let the discovery of gravity? Go further back. Is it because they created the first sin making Eve to seem with a little snack-ish? Have a good trip and grab the apple? Even further back than that, my dear. Hmm. I don't know, those are the only two that stories about an apple.

That's really the first story. When God created the universe, he did so in seven days. Well, technically six, he rested on the seventh day. That's why we have the Sabbath, don't you know. But on the fourth day, he was kind of done by the early afternoon so he had some time to curl and he was like, let's not mess it around with produce. So God started it up again and he started making bananas, oh bananas, they're long, they're funny, they got to skin off the outside, they're supposed to eat it very fun. And then God was like, why don't

I make a kiwi and he's like,, people are gonna be able to do this, but to see if the rest of the game. I have a question about God making bananas. When God ate the first banana, did he look around to make sure nobody was looking because it might be weird? No, but that's what he did that with Corn Dog. He did that with the first Corn Dog.

So Corn Dog, you should be produce? What, no, you're skipping ahead. Corn dogs were day five. Corn dogs got, God was like, what about a state fair? And he did corn dogs, day five, elevators, day five, pineapple upside down cake was day six. That was completely different.

Apple turnovers, day five. Apple. Lemon shake up day four. That was so. He treated an apple and their evil and then he puts them in apple turnovers. I don't understand. uh, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, stuff from our textbook. Yeah, a lot of geometry and algebra. The only textbook that I use is called the B. I are looking down to. I.G.I.A. Mike McBigley is there. Some of the best. Okay, I got it. I by the way, cannot know for sure if I spelled anything even close to

her big way of that. Bra, bra, bra, bra. Um, yeah, every once in a while there's a new character on this show that steals my heart and then I know I'm gonna bring back a hug or something. Mother John. So what is, so if Apple sauce is Devil's puree, what is Apple juice? Devil's tears. Oh, and then it should be good to drink them, right? Devil's pee.

Cant drink, those devil tears. As round as an apple. Why would I be good to drink the devil's tears? Because you he's crying he said Why would you drink it? You're celebrating how sad he is you're doing a toast to how sad you made the devil when the devil suffers you grow stronger It's simple math. I know grandpa is When the devil suffers you grow stronger. It's simple math. I know grandpa is upset about the untimely passing of his wife, but I'd be collecting his tears to drink, and that'll make him feel better. Exactly. Yeah, okay, fuck. Well, yeah, now that I say it. Okay, so it's like an apple, it goes over a church, right?

Round as an apple, as plump as a ball, can climb over a church, steeple, and all. Oh, I know the bell. Got it. It's a butt. I know it. It'll answer it. Got it. Locked in. Quasimodo.

No, he wasn't as round as a ball. Sure he was. Okay. Is it a bell? No. I like the way you're thinking now. You're doing great. You know it?

I think I know it. I think I know it. Aaron, is this something that you can touch? No, yeah? Okay, I know it. Yeah, I know it. It's something that can touch you Is it the concept of an apple? Okay, I know when it don't way you can't touch it, but it can touch you is it the Sun? Yeah, yeah Good job. It is father the Sun. I gave a good hint and the Holy Ghost holy ghost yeah because the son can touch you with its rays Yeah Okay, all right. I'll see you in a second, Adel JPC are you definitely coming back after the break I already took my break break, I'm on break! I'll see you during the ads.

Okay, yeah let's hold hands and watch the ads together. Hold my hand. Hey JPC, you know how I love, he looks asleep, I love that he looks mattress brand, especially nice sleep in my life. I know not everyone is on board yet So I secured Award winning sleeper Merrill sleep. She's right behind that door Merrill sleep. Wow. She won the golden pillow for best sleep That's right. Hey Merrill

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I don't think I thought you were the person that you were talking about, she's doing it. Who are, what a performance. Helix mattresses all come with a 10 to 15 year warranty depending on the model. Oh, stunning. Yeah, look, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners.

Go to helixsleep.com slash riddle. This is their best offer yet. And it will not last long with helix better sleep starts now. Go ahead and give her the Academy of Snorr. The snorr Academy of Snorr. You know what? You mean Academy of Snorr. Glint close to falling asleep. That's why. Oh, yeah. I got that a lot. Hey, Adel, hey, Aaron, I got a bone to pick with the two of you. Sure, yeah, I wore the skeleton outfit just because I figured this was coming. Happy Halloween a few months early.

It's not yet the... What is it? So you know how the two of you, I was like, guys, I am always so hungry for lunches and dinners and the like and you, jokers told me, oh, JPC, it's okay. All you have to do is take some, you know, American paper currency, tape it to your front door, close the door, and then wait until someone brings you food. Well, I kept opening the door and the money was gone.

So I had to tape more money to my door. I think you're thinking, didn't work at all. Oh, Dorkash. Dorkash. Yeah, you did dorkash. We told you, D to work out all. Oh, door cash. Dore Cash. Yeah, you did dore cash. We told you dore dash is the number one thing to you. What the hunk? With door dash, you'll enjoy next level convenience with delivery in the hour, making it easier than ever to get whatever you want delivered to your house, whether that be back to school supplies

or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I eat back to school supplies. But what? JPC, all your favorite retail, grocery and convenience stores are on the app. So you can chop everything, your kids, your dogs, your family might need for back to school. And hey, personally, just yesterday, I bought some marshes homemade premium quality buck eyes, you know, those candies that are chocolate stuff with peanut butter.

I just got those from DoorDash and they were, they were on my porch within 20 minutes and it's very, very dangerous because they're delicious. Did you fill your belly and your pantry? Uh, yes. Did you fill your backpack? I did. Okay, well then DoorDash has come again for the gold. I remember distinctively the stress of going back to school and going from store to store to get all my favorite snacks and pencils and pencil cases and all the things that I needed me and my siblings and I remember how stressed my mom was and I

know that she would have loved to have DoorDash so she could be prepared before the big back to school day arrived. So you can stock up with go to breakfast lunch box staples and brands that you love. Don't eat my school supplies JPC. You can see but that eraser down with that trapper keeper down your mouth is too small. Never been told that before. Shop door dash to get everything you need for the back to school season delivered right to your door. Order now for stress free back to school shopping. Use promo code riddle to get 50% off up to $10 value. When you spend $15 or more at convenience,

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Yeah. You're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm pranking Atal, and I'm sending up a whole website to prank him. I just need help. I'm Prinking at all and I'm setting up a website to I just need some advice this podcast is sponsored by Squarespace I'm not I'm not mad at you. We're pranking at all spaces to all the one website platform Entrepreneurs to stand out and to see it online whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website engaged with your audience and editing to see it online, whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand.

Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience, and sell anything for products to cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms. Hey, Otto, come here, come here, come here. Hey, what's going on? I actually, I want to prank JPC, and I want to set up a whole website to prank him.

Do you have anything that like, is there like an online store that could set up on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace, you can have custom merch, you can easily sell custom merch and create passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production

and inventory and shipping are handled for you, saving you time and money. What is happening okay? Wait, what's going on with that all oh nothing nothing? I'm just setting up a very normal square space website not a prank thing new he's gonna to you And I'm gonna use analytics use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from That's pretty cool I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords,

our popular products and content on my Prank website for Prank's Artoology. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for? I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. Prank. With Squarespace.

With Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party tools to extend the functionality of your website Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, battle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine Dude, we got her anyway if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine head to squarespace.com for a free trial And when you're ready to launch go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back, she's back. Hey, Erin.

Hey, Erin. Can we go to grandma's house? Wait, I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. Hey, Rick, go break the door. How do that was so nice to sit and watch those ads with you and now we're back. I wish you would have said something during them. No, no, no, no.

You're quite as a little church mouse. No, no, no, no. Sometimes there's no better feeling than like waking up early in the morning, making a coffee, getting cozy with a blanket, and just watching the ads come up. Yeah, gorgeous. It's like the right way to start your day. It helps with your circadian rhythms. I have a question for the two of you. Yeah. Would you rather watch a sunset or a sunrise? Oh, the fiddler on the roof question. I would rather watch. That's funny.

I would rather watch the sun. I mean, I'm a night person. I'm gonna say sunset, but the most beautiful sun activity I ever saw was the sun rising on top of Hollywood, which is a volcano or mountain in Hawaii. And that was like the most beautiful thing I've seen in nature. And that was a sunrise. I think I think if I had to pick, I think I would be a sunrise person, because it feels like a little more special because of how many of them I miss. Like I don't see. Whereas with sunsets, I feel like I feel like

I've just seen so many more of them. So I feel like I would appreciate a sunrise a little more. This is a super interesting question because I feel like there's two different types of people, people who can do moments like that. Oh, Aaron's comedy sets coming. Here we go. Here's your stand up.

You know it's all white people watching. I hope you like it. Yeah. And then women be like, man, you get it. Okay, so. Aaron's stand up by the way is white people and women. Yeah.

Sir. Yeah, you get it. Okay, so. That's the only safe way to do it. Um. She's both groups. She's the only safe way to do it. She's both groups. She's both groups. So why would she do that?

That's fine. Stand up to do. The not a lot of people I think can handle, like moments of stillness in the morning, and moments to appreciate and slow down in the morning, and because they can't like stop their mind from racing and thinking about all this stuff, they still have to do that day

and they feel like they haven't earned relaxing it. And I'm one of those people where, like, Sunrise is beautiful. And if I'm like camping around vacation, I like it. But if I go, and after this moment, beautiful moment of stillness, I have my day to do and work and emails and stuff and laundry, like, that doesn't feel as relaxing

and like I can enjoy it as much if I have all that coming after. I'm someone who likes to take my free time and my relaxing time at night and not in the morning. That makes sense, yeah. I agree that I feel like people do fall into those camps. And then I also think that I wanna see a scene

and Aaron, you can let me know if this is fun for you and if not, we don't have to do it. But I do want to see you. You're going to do a stand-up set. It's going to be like, you ever notice that this type of person, but the only type of person that you're going to reference is bad stand-up comedians, like referencing yourself. Cool. Okay, let me see if I can do this.

I hope that you can because I was like, maybe I should do this and I was like, I don't understand it. So I'll give it to Aaron to do it. I don't understand it. So we'll give it to Aaron to do it. I don't understand. I get it. I was on this airplane the other day, okay? Woo. And I think, you know what I thought to myself?

There's too much stand-up comedy about arrow planes. Everyone's always like, the peanuts, sir. Yeah, I'm saying, you ain't lying. Yeah, okay. In the, what peanuts are, yeah, okay. In the, um, what is he called? Terminal? Security. Yeah.

Oh, it's so annoying. And then all of a sudden, we have to take off our belts. And I'm like, whoa, buy me a drink first. And then I thought, oh my god, it's so annoying when stand-ups think jokes like I'm thinking. Uh, I have pre-check I can't relate Okay, my wife who you know is blah blah blah we don't know her was telling me the other day How offensive it is when comedians talk about their nagging wives like it's 95 and that men don't benefit from marriage Way more women and I went

shut up wait what she's right I said shut up. Nat you're nagging me about how right you are this concept is off the hard anyways what else what else this has the cadence of comedy but none of the comedy of comedy. Well, you please at least, we at least not sit in that chair. Ah, but then that's saying something, I'm commentating on, I'll stand back up. I'm living in hotels, but that's boring when I do,

isn't annoying when stand-up comedians talk about their hotels. What else? I'll say you're living and then I'd say you're staying in them You probably have some sort of home base. Oh, I have a heckler. Let me try to emasculate you And we can have a dick measuring contest. That's something a bad comedian would say. I'll just say fuck you. You're you're dumb I want you We really want you to succeed I'll just say fuck you, you're dumb! I'm with you! Yeah! We really want you to succeed! That made sense, I think I made a... Yeah, that made sense, that made...

Hey, I got exactly what I asked for. I love... Thank you, Santa! I know this was the one to one, but I love it being like... You have to wait all that time in the... What is it called? Terminal? No, check out mine out why stop like me Like you asked for it. I'm crying because didn't that sound a little bit like if you put on a DVD I've a stand-up set and the DVD player caught

um caught a flame person to flames and if you were watching the screen still you'd be like yeah That's what it looks like when a DVD of a standup set catches on fire. What's about right? I think there are some touring club comics who would listen to that and be like, I spent 20 years honing that set

and she could just do it in a second. She just does the whole set in one minute. What were the last 20 years of my life with my nagging wife, blah, blah, blah, blah, hope tells it bad. Oh, I'm hearing it. I'm hearing it. Okay, here's your next riddle.

Yes. These are still from Shane. Thank you, Shane. When you go over a ditch, what part of you goes first? When you go over a ditch, what party goes first? I love the song. It's super interesting. Well, usually you fall head over heels and long.

Nothing happens and I head over heels. Is it like your scream or something? When you said it's interesting it can't be a part of the body can it? Well, I want to long your scream is close. Is it like your head lights or something? The bumper? No, you're a person Falling your person okay, your person falling into a ditch Is it like when you're like heartbeats out of your chest? Is that like the whole thing like? Yeah, I need to be so stressful that your heart jumps out of your chest

Bauga first is it like a Bauga situation? I Love what you're thinking about but it's unrelated to this show My god, I love about wuga when Gandalf fights the Bauga Love what you're thinking about, but it's unrelated to this show. Oh, oh my God. I love about Wigga. When Gandalf fights the Bawoga, and he says, try your fools, and then he goes down to fight the Bawoga. Yes. And they're on the mountain side of the Bawoga.

You don't see that right away. You see that in a second. And you think it's done. And Gandalf is safe, and then he goes Bawoga. And his little whip grabs his legs. Uh-huh, so good. And then Adel's favorite part of the movie where Gandalf doesn't remember his friends.

Adel loves that part of the movie. The worst part in any movie in history, in my opinion. It's so funny how much that makes you mad. Gandalf, hey, Gandalf! Remember that name, Gandalf. Yes. I am Gandalf the White. Yes, same fucking difference.

Aaron, can you read the question the riddle one more time? Adel I love what makes you mad Which makes me an insolvable friend, but it just cracks it cracks me up I don't make you mad that should be real quick real quick Adel do you think that you would be interested in watching a recap of Lord of the Rings that I'm 75% done with I'm so close to being done with okay It's Lord of the Rings recut with sopranos and it's called James Gandalfini and maybe it's drunk before great. You ever make the same Gandalf jokes as your friends because you spend too much time together.

You should not pass. When you go over a ditch what part of you goes first and scream was closest? When you go over a ditch, what part of you goes over a ditch? What's the context for going over a ditch? Are you jumping over a ditch? Are you falling into a ditch? I guess if it's... so they're using the word ditch here, but I think like in a lot of ways, many times, this feels very irish and old-timeing. They answer to this. But I think like what part of you goes first unless you're going down a slide maybe? What part of you maybe goes first? Oh, it's probably your heart because you always lead with your heart

in your life. Slightly more literal. Is it like you go head first into the ditch? Is that is it like you go head first? It's like something else, you're getting close, like head, frame, or something. Brainfirst. Is it your butt? Are you bummed going first into the ditch? No, it's like, it's something that reaches your destination before you're. So there's a, it's something that is of you for a moment.

That, your name, that reaches your destination right before you do physically if you're walking. Your eyesight. Your soul. Your breath. Your breath. Your breath. Kind of interesting, right? Very old timey and Irish.

Wait, what? I don't think I get it. Whatever you like. Yeah. You lose your breath. Is that what they're saying? It's like, because you're so scared about the ditch. Huh.

Huh. Okay. Okay. All right. Look, I don't speak Irish. They're not always not. Why are you packing up your things? Where are you going?

They're leaving. I gotta go back on the road, baby. I gotta make Godmuddies. So we can live in this nice house. We have to go back to the future. It's not you, it's your riddles. Yeah, I get it. I got it.

All right. Next one. OK. As I went up a slippery gap, I met my uncle Davey. I cut his throat and sucked his blood and left his body. And, and left his body go easy. As I went up a slippery gap, I met my uncle Davey. I cut his throat and sucked his blood and left his body

and left his body go easy. Vampire. What's the question? What's the riddle? This is just nursery rhyme for sick kids. Isn't it an Irish band that sings that song? Whoa, whoa, leave me, Brad. What on the voice? No, no, no, no, no. Yeah, I think that's Irish. That's Irish

brand. It's not the cranberries, but that is a Jeff. For him. Aaron, is this a bit? No, no, no, this is something. It's a fun little like who you would say funny, fun little. I would say it. What is all right? No, it's so good. Are we guessing a phrase here? Is that what the guess is? We're trying to guess a phrase. No, it's not a phrase. It's a thing. Are we trying to guess what that person is that did all those things? No, it's a thing. It's just a thing. One more time. As I went up a slippery gap, I met as I went up a slippery gap. I met my uncle Davey. I cut his throat and

sucked his blood and left his body go easy. So it's probably, it's probably like a strawberry or something. It's probably like, yeah, you're close. It's something like that you're consuming. That's normal. Yes. Yes. So is the mouth up the slippery? Oh, is it a Capri Sun? And the Capri Sun? Oh my god. And the slippery slope is that little hole you have to slide that little straw into. Yep, this. Capri Sun.

Riddles from 1800s Ireland. Is it Capri Sun at all? Is Uncle Davie, is it like Cockney rhyming slang? Or like biscuits and gravy? Yeah, oh, I had to, Uncle Davie, you know, they mean biscuits and gravy. Yeah, you're, yeah, totally. Okay.

What does Uncle Davy do? I don't like you saying strawberries like yet very much you're going down the right path. It's not a fruit or food necessarily, but you're going down the right path. So slippery gap. That's the mouth. I think the slippery gap is your mouth. Maybe I'm wrong about that. Well, if you go up in the mouth, you go into the brain and you die.

Yeah, oh, so it's Uncle Davey, your brain. Something's wrong with my Uncle Davey, isn't it, God? If I were to give this riddle notes, which I'm not, my Irish ancestors were haunting me currently and making it so I'm allergic to everything that isn't potatoes, I'm not giving you a note. I would maybe go, I rung his throat. I rung his throat. I saw his snap to his throat. Would have maybe left a clearer

picture than I cut his throat and suck. If you did like, I rung his neck and sucked his blood, would have been a, I think a better visual. This is like ringing out of wet cloth into your mouth? No, it's something you can, yeah, so you consume it, it's like a very normal thing to consume. You consume it, but it's not food. Is it drink? Mm-hmm.

It is drink. Is it, you drink it in nature? Oh, it's festive. Honey suckle. More festive. Mm. Christmas juice. By the way, a cut and suck is what like an old-timey like 15th century barber would do.

They would like, you have cut in suck. Oh no. Um, uh, JPC, you are a 15th century barber. Uh, at all you are a guy with just like really just like a little cold. You just got like a little tickle in your throat and you just want like a loss in or something normal or a normal haircut, you're just not looking for whatever his 10 is. That's it. Hey, welcome, welcome, welcome. What can we do here for?

I think if possible, I saw in the window that you offer a five-pence cut and suck. Yeah, this is my barberry. My name is Bapabar, this is my barberry. My name is Bapabar. This is my barberry. And yes, it's 5-pins for a cut and suck. But I gotta say, your hair is already looking pretty good. Your paler is looking pretty squallant. So are you sure you need a cut and suck?

If I am to be honest, sir, I don't need the cut, but I do need the suck. My throat is a little scratchy and I need something to alleviate my pain. Okay okay we can elite ya so go ahead and sit in the leeching chair by the way do you mind if we do a shampoo it is included. I do mind sir okay it is included so you are gonna be paid for it either way. And I also I do not need leeches sir my humors are fine it is included so you are gonna be paid for it either way and I also I do not Doesn't seem fair doesn't need leeches sir. My humors are fine. It is my throat. Yeah, we'll give you the cut and suck I don't worry

Also, sir if I may and not to give notes is there a better way to advertise what you're offering? I mean I told the town cryer about it. You do not hear it from the cryer. I did. John did scream it to all the town and- Was that the little guy with him? Uh, yes. The- the half-man? Yeah, that how- yes. John is half-man. And John did look pretty in his- in his colors. Um, but I do require- What about John's compatriot? Did you see the sheen on him?

I did, sir. I did not care for it. I- you know what? I don't care for the sheen. But, will you put the sheen next to the cire? Makes the cire look a lot better, huh? Uh, it's opinions, sir. I require some sort of mental lip dish. Mm-hmm. A lip dish for the brain. What have you done for it so far?

Well, I've tried gargling hot water, sir. I did... Which craft? No, no, sir, I assure you gargling hot water, sir. I did witchcraft. No, nope, no, sir. I assure you. Don't bring that witchcraft into it. If you even utter the word apple, I'll kick you out of here.

Will you just murder it? Okay, well, here's what we'll do. We'll make you a paltus of twigs and stems. You'll give it to an owl. You'll tell the owl to... You'll whisper a secret into the paltus first. Then you'll give it to an owl. You'll tell the owl to you'll whisper a secret into the paltus first Then you'll give it to the owl if the owl flies north You'll have to be put to death. There's nothing for you. It's a cure

There's no cure if the owl flies south. Well, that's when we'll go to the swamp Okay, I'm willing to take the risk and it is that I if the owl fly straight up is that north? willing to take the risk. And if the alphys straight up is that North? You know what, I have this thing, I call it my personal sense of direction, where straight up is North. It's right back itself. Okay, exactly.

Like I know that that's not right, because it's got to do with the sun and everything, but it's like, I can't not see in front of me as North. Like if someone's like, take it right, take it North. That's the same thing to me. Mm. Like, right is always East. Do you understand? Left is always West.

I don't understand, but I do want to be in your good graces, so I am nodding my head. Ah, my good graces. Then you've noticed my lovely wife. Yes, my good graces. And her compatriot will. It's okay. They're just friends. We're not. We're sleeping together.

And you keep her under the fire for what reason? Yes, what else? What else? Darma So can I tell you what it is? It's a festive drink. It's like hold on it'll make you feel it's a drink Mm-hmm. Make you feel is it like make you feel it's a drink. And make you feel is it like blog or what's that stuff? More wine, blog. Overthinking it.

A common Irish drink that isn't Guinness. Water. Bayley's whiskey. Yeah, whiskey. It's whiskey. It's a bottle of whiskey. Is Uncle Davey a brand of whiskey? I think it might just be like maybe an Irish listener can tell us.

But I cut his throat and sucked his blood. It's sort of helpful. But I think his throat and suck his blood, it's sort of helpful. But I think like, you opened up the snap. Yeah, I get you. I get you. I see it. I guess old Irish people were all

but it was like it swords or whatever. Maybe if it's got like a wax seal, it was something that you had to cut into. Maybe that makes sense. That makes sense. I want to get through more of these because they crack me up. This one, you're not going to be able to do that.

We're not stopping you. This one you're not going to be able to get, but it really, having like, okay, Irish lineage and grandparents. This is a real, yeah, this is Irish nonsense. This one. Aaron, how dare you doubt us? We will 100% will get this. Okay. Patch up on patch without any stitches.

Riddle me that and I'll buy you some riches. Needle. A thread. Oh, is this that old-timey thing where you had two buttons and a flap on the back of pants and so you could unbutton them and go there. Just move into the hole. That's like my- That's one of it. Graham parents used to say, if he was a din in a bin box, he- wait, what is it?

Sorry, if he was a din in a van, if he was a din in a bin box and he is a for ya, he'll a getcha and that's just the saying that we're around my house and I was like what kind of person am I supposed to be what does that mean wow I haven't got a pat to pee in or a window to throw it out some Irish idioms for you if he was a din in a bin box and he's a for ya he'll a getcha tell me what that means patch upon patch okay what you the patch atoms come out this is not a helpful thread patch upon Patia, tell me what that means. Patrapon, patch. Okay, what did the patch atoms come out? This is not a helpful thread.

Patrapon, patch without any stitches, riddle me that and I'll buy you some bridges. You're not gonna get it. There's no stitches. It's patches without stitches. Is this like a suture? No, it's like, I think garden patch. Oh, it's gonna say like patch of grass,

like patch of. Patch of. Patch of on patch, but now at this point, you're really just going to be guessing a vegetable that could be growing in a garden. Carrot. Turn up. Rootabaga. Big door, same Patrick's day at my house.

It's disgusting and soggy and not crumbly. Cabbage, yeah. It's cabbage. Oh, a cabbage patch. I haven't had corned cabbage in a while. That's a cabbage patch, yeah. But like, how do I lead you guys to that without going, what is it?

A blank patch. Aaron said that we weren't going to get it, and all it took was a bunch of hints and heard basically holding our fucking hands to it. And guess what? We proved her wrong. I want to see a quick scene. Aaron, JPC, you are a farmer who grew a little garden.

You've come outside one morning to check on the garden. Aaron, you are a cabbage patch kid. And not that you were a doll, but you are a head growing out of the middle of a cabbage, just that sprouted that morning. Hey, don't scream. Don't scream. Don't scream. I know. Literally, the only reason I did not scream is because Hey, don't scream. Don't scream. Don't scream. I know.

Literally, the only reason I did not scream is because you said don't scream. I know. Yep. Don't scream. I know. Hey. Where's that voice coming from? Oh, don't scream.

Don't scream. I know. Holy fuck. Hey. I know. Okay. I actually don't know how I got here why I'm here and what's happening. I did grow. I am sentient and I think I have the intelligence of a...

10th grader? No. Grown woman. Grown woman. Who's to say? Um, don't think you should dig me up. Also scared of staying here forever. Not really sure what to do. You're the gardener. Tell me what's next. Oh, okay. Well, the good news is, I'm still drunk. Hey boss. This isn't happening. It's me, the scarecrow. Don't scream.

Don't scream. Why would I? I don't- Why does everyone assume that I'm in the screen? Where's that voice coming from? Uh, the scarecrow. Buh-ha! Holy shit!

Hey, I'm- I'm not gonna get down off my post. I'm just gonna say you should kill that. That's evil it is. I saw that spacecraft this morning. Glass houses? My god, little bit rude. You mean a greenhouse? No, I'm seeing glass.

Oh god. I'm calling you, seeing glass houses. We're both weird, man. We're both scary. We're both weird Information that I'm still very drunk. This is good. Oh, do you have a little bit of a Uncle Davie? Okay, yeah, I guess it must be good morning You must not feel hungover. I realized I was giving you First coming from oh my god honey. Don't scream. I'm just right by you. Why would I scream?

Why does everyone think the worst? Oh my god, you're beautiful. Oh I love you. That's really sweet. Okay, that's nice. I'm just saying I accidentally bought the nice the smile the personality It's Oh my god. Okay, I'm just saying. Thanks for days, 50 years of marriage and you're still the most beautiful thing I've ever done. I accidentally bought the non-alcoholic whiskey. We haven't been drinking, actually.

Divorce. Divorce. Divorce. Not alcoholic whiskey. All right, so. Oh, here I just thought of a, I had a flash in my brain for a fun name for a coffee and it's called grounds for divorce

Wow Would be fun to have something to cook or that that would be a fun way to find out huh? All right, ready. Yes, I want to get through these very quickly. So we're just gonna write them off Adam and Eve and pinch me went over the water to bathe Adam and Eve were drowned Which of the three was saved? Pinch me. Oh, oh Yeah, and that's what says. And then you pinch them since they asked, Oh, this is like that's that's

fantastic. That's almost like the Pete repeat. Well, when they beat drowned, who was left repeat, Pete and P were mean. Yeah, then you punch that person right in the teeth. The eventually a beaten Pete, as round as a marble, as deep as a cup, all the King's men could never pull it up. They're pants. Yeah, it's gonna say the pants.

You can have a little bit of fun with this one. I know we're trying to go fast, but you can hold up. They're marble pants. They're... All the King's horses, what was it? All the... As round as a marble, as deep as a cup,

all the King's men could never pull it up. This is sort of... Oh, well! It's like a tree roots King's Men can never pull it up. This is, oh well. It's like a tree roots. Is it not a tree roots? Yeah, it's a well. You got it. I just was surprised by so quickly you got it. I thought that one was gonna be hard.

I'm very impressed. Well done. Damn. As black as silk. Wait a second. I can be ira. Nope. You can't, let me have one thing.

Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. Shouldn't we go another path? Okay. But that's fine. Okay. Alright. Shouldn't we go down that path? Okay. I am, but that's fine. No, you said you said you'd lie. I think all three of us are part of it. No, you said I can have one. No, you're an issue thing. It's your thing. One thing. As black as silk, as white as milk, it hops on the road like hailstone. Oreo. Kinda sort of cute. It's like a cute Oreo. Cute Oreo. Oh, high drugs.

Just an animal that is black and so quiet as milk it hops on the road like a haze. Cow. Scoot. No, it hops. It's a little. Jackrabbit. This is not an animal that would come to mind from the first hundred animals. It's a black and white animal that hops badger skunk. Uh,

she we have a sheep cow lamb. Hmm cat. Cool, but dog. Can't grow. It's a magpie. Uh, I hear magpie. It would be fly. I know that I've seen a magpie hop. I've seen him hop. That would be flag pie. I've seen them beg by hop. I've seen them hop. What is that always, what is that always walks with its head down? Somebody wants to avoid the brown. I should roll.

That old cuss. What, oh, what is it that always walks with its head down? What is it that always walks with its head down? It's head down. Like a like a stick of source? This is super confusing. Maybe I'm tired, but can I just tell you guys the answer to this and you can explain to me a nail in your boot? I guess that because the head of the nail is down and it's yeah. that makes a lot of sense in a word of Reddit

Would have gotten it if I hadn't read it as boat I read it as boat because I am tired. It's boot This is your fault, Adel your bachelor party was too fun. Thank you, man Yeah, man. All right, and I just want to apologize for nailing your boots to the floor Yeah, weird weird man Adel I want you to play you're gonna be playing a little ship captain, Aaron and I, are like, newly wedded. You're taking us out of this. It's supposed to be like this nice scenic cruise,

but you're like an old kooky ship captain who is trying to warn us of the dangers of the sea. So now that we're out in the ocean, I will stop steering the boat. We'll drop anchor. And I want you all to just enjoy this guy, but he it's warning keep in mind red at night

sleep tight red in the morning oh we it's a warning oh okay thank you we're just I think we're just gonna try to take some the champagne is such a nice touch yeah thank very nice. You didn't drink the champagne. Did you know? No, not yet. We're about to do a little toast with it.

Oh, champagne is not for you to be drinking. It's the word off the spirits. Their shark ghosts all around the ship. We're actually celebrating something. We just like tried. Oh, you're celebrating. We just got married. This is like kind of the beginning.

It's a pre honeymoon like kickoff. Like a kickoff honeymoon event Did you get married on a day that ends in a four? That's not a thing Before oh you'd be like the date wise. What did I say? I thought it was like a day that I did why Like there's a day that was like thirst for what have they What's wrong with getting married on a day that ends with four? It's a cursive day. And frankly I'd jump off my boat right now and swim to shore and leave you two to die

here. No, we didn't. I'd better be safe and nail your boots to the boat. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow. We owe sorry I should have said spread your toes. These are spares. These are spares. These are spares. The nails just go right through spares. What are spares?

Big dock shoes boat shoes. This baby sometimes what they're called. This is so nice. This has been really nice And we would just love a good course. Such a quick moment of like privacy. You should enjoy. Yes, of course Here's what I need. I need from you sir. I need 10 pieces of spit man from you. I need a quart of blood We we paid online I believe I think we already paid online I have a website oh god Oh, we should see this is this is good. We should have asked to clarify get question. You're captain Kevin correct. Yes. I am What's your last name? Kevin okay, where are the wrong boat? Did you go to boat.com?

Yeah, we did. Oh, we went to boat.com? I'm under boat.com. Oh, no. Save. I'm having a great time on the boat. All right, I'm going to do the rest of these so fast, ready?

Yes, sure. Queen Victoria built a ship, and in that ship her daughter sits, and I'll be killed for telling her name, and that's three times I've told it. Titanic, the Queen Victoria. Queen Victoria built a ship, and in that ship her daughter sits, and I'll be killed for telling her name,

and that's the three times I've told it. It is her name her. Her, and three times. Yep, it's Anne. Anne. It's so hard to read that. I practice like so've told it. It is her name, her, and three times. Yep, it's Ann. Ann. It's so hard to read that. I practice like so much and it's still hard. Queen Victoria built a ship and that,

and in the ship, her daughter said, We've already got an hour to kill. I know I just wanted to get a one. You don't have to do it again. I'll go all the way. You don't have to do it again. So it's an antaylor? Yeah, it goes under the water and over the water,

but never gets into it. Under the water and over the water. It goes over the water and under the water, but never gets into it. Under the water and over the water. It goes over the water and under the water, but never goes into it. Is it like the sunrise? I don't think you're going to hate this one or love this one. I know it's going to live in an extreme for you. It's not the sunrise. Is it like fucking Jack B. Nimble?

Nope. It's a duck's egg that's still inside of the duck. I know how do we feel. Oh, I love it. I knew it. I know it. I fucking knew it. It's so dumb.

I knew you'd love it. You love stuff that's that silly. Duck sucks. I fucking knew it. It's so dumb. I knew you'd love it. You love stuff. That's it. That's silly. Doc's like to keep the egg inside. It's like an edging for the duck.

Oh, no. Oh, no. As I went up a slippery gap, I met my auntie Mary. She had an iron nose and silver toes. I tipped her in the middle in a way she goes. Wine. Nope. But I understand why you thought that based on the old one. I tipped her in the middle in a way she goes. Wine. Nope, but... I understand why you thought that based on the old one.

So is this also a drink? No, it's not. Now it's an object. As I went up a slippery gap, I met my auntie Mary. She had an iron nose and silver toes. I tipped her in the middle in a way she goes. Is it like a tin soldier iron nose? No, yeah, but you're really on the right track there. Iron nose, silver toes. Is does it statue gargoyle?

You tip during a way she went, right? Yeah, so it's an object that does something. Yeah, empty. Is it like a thermometer? No, it's something you're there's a way when you empty it is not really the word that you associate most with what happens when it's tipped, but it's technically being emptied of something. Oh, wait. with what happens when it's tipped, but it's technically being emptied of something.

Oh, a waiter. Iron nose and silver toes mean, like the old fashioned version of this thing. Iron nose and surface. I like, I like Adels' answer of a waiter. Like when you're tipping them, you're emptying them. I would say, like you, like, tipped her is also like, you could, like I would say, like you like tipter is also like you could Like I would say you pulled her back like you pulled her I would I it feels like more of a pulling

back motion We're on The trigger of a gun or something. Yeah, you got it. It is Nice, that's good on riddle me me, Riddle me, through a rock. Through a reel, through an old spinning wheel. Through a bag of pepper, through an old horse shin bone. Riddle me that, or leave me alone. And half the children, like hundreds of children, submitted this one, and half of them submitted

one answer, and half of them submitted another, so accepting too. Salt and pepper. Riddle me, Riddle me, through a rock. Through a reel, through an old spinning wheel. Through a bag of pepper, through an old horse's shin bone. Riddle me, Riddle me through a rock, through a reel, through an old spinning wheel, through a bag of pepper, through an old horse's shin bone. Riddle me that, or leave me alone. Black and white. An old horse's shin bone.

Is this like a gravestone? God, this is a lot of objects that still exist. Yeah, it's two very different things, but I'll just tell you, it's a maggot in lightning. Wow. Pretty cool. Pretty cool. Pretty cool. And we should say just a cover of bases, we should say never mix Uncle Davey and Aunt Mary. Exactly.

Absolutely not. Never. There's one more riddle. Yes. As I went to the fair of St. Ives, I met nine men in their wives. Each man had a cat, each cat had a kitten. Kidding's cats, men's and wives. How many

were going to the fair of wives? Fair of same types. You. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Just because you're going to. Because they were no left because that that fair fucking sucks. We did it. I bet it that fair. It's no good. It's no good. It's a bad fair. It's an unfair. So I just want to thank Shane again for sending this and I love this email with the riddles and I had a great time and he says PS love the potato jokes but the accents are trotious. Should have read that first before we dove right in again trying to never give up. Or as we say the old country before to be doover right over. He's post potatoes, Mary. I hate to be the one to tell you this, Mary, but he's post potatoes.

Hey, Adel, yes. Were you just saying that you had recently gone to a really bad fair and then you wanted to plug something? Man, I got halfway through that. JPC just said the record straight. I had a very bad affair in that it was with a tree. Great. My penis is broken. JBC, I do have something to plug,

which is, we mentioned this on an upcoming Patreon, but I'm gonna say it here as well. I have a few games I would recommend that we all played at my Bachelor party. One is called Magical Athlete, which is super fun. It's out of print, so it might be a little pricey, but maybe wait and see if they have a second printing. Also, the New Yorker caption game,

which is one of my favorite games, and two Jackbox PartyPack games. One is called Trivia Murder Party 2, made by our friend, Ornitha Camp, and the other one is called Press the Button, which is a lot of, it's like a Sussing Out's, who's a alien or something? Was it alieners? I think it's an alien, yeah.

Yeah, alien, yeah. It's just kind of a blame game tossing out. You can hack friends, systems and stuff. It's very, very fun. I had a blast. Aaron, since you had a blast, do you have anything else you wanna pipe in about? I wanna plug drinking water and laying down.

DPC? Yeah, that's very smart. I'll coinc. Maybe smart. Yeah, that's very smart. I'll go sign on that. Yeah, I gotta do it. I gotta plug elder ring. You gotta be playin' elder ring people. It's an important thing. It's cultural.

It's us, Moses. You gotta get on there and you gotta play. And if you wanna see me play, I probably am still playing it. Check out twitch.tv slash shark barkman. And that's all I gotta plug. Aaron, is there? I got an Irish riddle for you.

That's a lot of money. Maybe you could tell me the answer. Oh boy. It's gonna be uncle something. I'm gonna spay. Hold on, just let's secure the rid. Just let him read. He has one written down at all.

Written letter. Yeah, okay, unfurly gift from this old Irish girl. Oh, shit, I'm shit, I'm shit, I'm shit. What the fuck is that? Why can I see it? get from this old Irish girl? Ohhhhhhh! Shhh! What the fuck is that? Why can't I see it? With my naked eyes! I'll put it in the sky! Oh my god!

Mark your what the fuck is that? What a bemo- That's super- Bye, per- Super- Super- Super- Super-

We're terrible. We're terrible. We got it. We got it. No, we should bail. We should. We're terrible. We're terrible. We got it. We got it. No, we should bail. We should. We're doubling down. Case in Tony to the editing.

How are you, Paris? Let me explain. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video.

We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video.

We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video. We're going to be in the video that you are going to love this week's Patreon. The three hosts get down and dirty with another chatterbox. You can listen to that plus our entire Batcadilog at patreon.com slash hey riddle riddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or the review crew and add free episodes for $8 a month. See you there! episodes for $8 a month. See you there!