Hey Riddle Riddle - #196: Mmm! Linguine!

Episode Date: April 20, 2022

We hope you're hungry for riddles! Todays menu has a spelling bee, an astronaut discovering new life, an angel in a rush, a sad butterfly and a man who can't stop talking to his popcorn! Enjoy your meal and tip your staff!  Starring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Editing by:  Casey Toney Theme by:  Arne Parrott Logo by:  Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a head gum podcast. And the world's ain't right here My feet be your head, reach the brick dome Welcome back, my name is Kendall Krevis And I'm here to help people talk to their dead cars Is there someone here, someone here who had a car that started with an H? H or an N? Or a T. Yeah, brand of car, brand of car, a question, brand of car or name of car.

Like what I personally call the car. Either one, either one sir. What was the name of your car? Jeff. Jeff, okay, so there was a J. Was it a Jetta? At least on Jetta? No. Okay, was it a T. There's a Volkswagen Jetta. But that's what I meant. That's what I No. Okay, was it a Toyota?

It was an Volkswagen Jetta. That's what I meant, that's what I meant. Okay, I'm getting that now. It seems like your car is playing a joke on me. Okay, your car's saying. Jeff was always funny. Your car's saying, room, room, does that make sense to you? Not to me, but it would make sense to Jeff.

Yes, okay. And I'm guessing Jeff died from, Jeff died from a, is it, I'm seeing like a battery or an engine It's like a battery or an engine or like yes. Oh, yes. Was that how he died? Yes, he was he was battered by an engine Another car's engine popped out Wait, he took a baseball bat and just battered the shit out of Jeff. Okay, well Jeff, Jeff wants, yes Jeff.

Okay, he's speaking to you. Sorry, show for a second, yes Jeff. Okay, I still know, don't say okay after, okay. Okay, Jeff wants you to know he loves you very much and he cannot wait to see you in heaven. Okay, does that make sense to you? No, I hate it Jeff, we were enemies. He's gonna kill me when I'm here. Okay, who else? It's gonna? No, I hated Jeff. We were enemies. He's gonna kill me when I'm here.

Okay, who else? I'm getting lucky. Excuse me, Mr. Cravis. Yes. Yeah, I have a Honda Accord. Oh, that must be the H I was seeing, a Honda Accord. What was the name? What did you name your Honda Accord?

Mr. Carr. Mr. Oh, yes, I'm seeing that now. I see MC. I thought that was like a rap thing, but now I'm seeing MC stands for Mr. Car. Mr. Oh, yes, I'm seeing that now. I see MC. I thought that was like a rap thing, but now I'm seeing MC stands for Mr. Car. So Mr. Car, okay, what am I? I'm seeing like, I'm seeing like a green or a black or a red, maybe like a bluish greenish blackish red. You're amazing. He was yellow. Yes, if you subtract green from blue, you do get that's what it was. That's what it was. Was Mr. Carter in the math? I guess. Sorry, was Mr. Carter in the math? Yeah. Is that how he died? No, he fell off the side of a cliff. Oh, who was a forgot to put him in park. Oh, no, forgot to put him in park.

Yes, I'm getting this now. He wants you to. Also, can you talk to family members too because my family was in that car. Was one of your family members a car? No. No. Well, I missed a car.

It was a car. Jeff was a car. Oh, did, did Mr. Car and Jeff know each other? I don't know. You two were meant to, you two were meant to fall in love. Is that your wife next to you, sir? Yeah. And is that your husband next to you, were meant to fall in love. Is that your wife next to you sir? Yeah, is that your husband next to you ma'am? Leave them you two were meant to be the edge your cars want you to man. There's at least a 30 year-age

He's much younger than me. Oh Okay, you're I couldn't get it. I couldn't get it. Yeah, and mr. Car won't the two of you to live together I can't I don't know how I'm feeling this I just know it and if you don't get married, they will start to exact revenge. Uh, I'm honestly okay with it. If, if this is the end for us, I'm fine. Well, you're marrying on with it. What's your favorite fast casual dining?

Chili's. Me too. Well, Applebee's. Well, yeah, Chili's is what you tell people because you're very fancy answer's Applebee's. This is not my first rodeo Hong Kong my name is out of five I'm JVZ and we are Hundreds of episodes in which is why this is the opening

Whoops hi guys do you like my new location? Oh? Yeah, my first time recording outside of the closet. Wow. You're at L.A.D., all right? You're at L.A.D., you're at L.A.D., all right? Yeah, no, yeah. You're clear. Okay, so let's try and use context clues. Behind you, I see a big metal fridge. I see a nice marble counter with a faucet. You are recording in your kitchen?

Get there. Yes, kitchen. I'm in my kitchen. What's the oven's name? I'm funny in here. I was gonna say guest bathroom. Because that looks like every guest bathroom. I've ever been. Oh Well decorated and welcoming

Thanks I can I will say funny in the kitchen sounds like a Maurice Sendak book Yeah, that's true Let's see what's up guys what's new with you? Oh What is new with you? Oh, what is new with me? Um, I don't, I, I just got back from a cruise. We went on a cruise for Jim's birthday, which is very fun. I think I sent you all, I think the first day of the cruise or second day of the cruise, because I hardly ever touched sand or brought in the sun.

I send the two of you a picture of me with a little lobster limbs. I got, but I got burnt real bad and I peeled for a week It's it's rough going from a Chicago winter to any sort of like location where the sun is just going to be out for a long time because We're just not prepared. I mean, I saw myself yesterday in the mirror and I was like oh, I'm like a ghost Like I need I need the sun to come back because I need I need to feel something on my, I feel like I'm in a blow away like I made a paper. The picture I sent you was like from my elbow up. I looked like an elephant tusk like I looked made of ivory.

Yeah. And then from my elbow down, it was like the back, the back of like a 65 year old Tennessee and snack or something. Like it was so. Be it you say you say made from ivory, but I say sculpted from marble. Oh, I think this guy's fucking cut. He's fucking jizzled. He's fucking David and Goliath over here.

Get a room. I'm David and David. Yeah, David in the street. The full package. Aaron, what's new with you? David and Goliath. That's new with you? That's you, David and Glyph. That's you.

I, the, I mean, the only thing that's new with me, if I'm being honest, is we all know, I got a dog named Spaghetti, but what we don't know is the two of us are at war. We are locked. What happened? We are locked in a mortal battle of will for the ages. So I think I may have talked about this before,

but I made the fucking sucker-ass mistake of sometimes when a dog wouldn't want to eat out of her food bowl. So I play this game, and we both do this, where we'll throw her food across the floor and she'll run across the floor and get her food kibble by kibble. And she loves it and she has a good time.

Well, this is a fun game to keep her distracted. Now it is the only way that she'll eat. Oh, no. So we are now on day two of spaghetti hunger strike. We're like, we gotta stop. We can't play the game with her. She has to eat the food in her bowl. And she was like, my simply won't.

And I'm like, okay, well, one of us is gonna die. Yeah. Because we're both too stubborn and proud. So we're trying to coax her. We're being very tricky with her, but we're not kidding. How many hours into not eating is she? She's two. This is her second evening without having food.

She only eats dinner. She only eats food in the evening. So this is evening number two, but I'm downstairs and Mariah's upstairs. And she said she will text me when spaghetti finally goes to her bowl. Because sometimes she'll fight it and she'll act like she's a tough guy. And then she'll go to her bowl and just eat it. So we're at war. It's a war.

I am completely unsurprised that your pet would go on strike. Like I assume she's unionizing the other guy. I'm on her side. I'm on her side. We, we, at one point she wasn't eating her food. So we started buying this sweet potato puree to top her food to give her like another interesting taste. And where I was like, now we just have to think of something else to

put on it. And I'm like, no, it has to stop. Because every four months, we're going to have to think of a new creative way to get her to eat her fucking dinner, which we're not doing. So, yeah, we're, we're, we're, we'll see. We'll see how this all shake. I'm always interested in this. Why is she a one meal a day dog am I is at a night? I mean, that's we used to just keep food out for her. When she was a puppy, she ate food in the morning and in the evening and then she just stopped eating the morning food.

And so like, we she always has food in her bowl. So she technically can eat whenever, but she just doesn't. She just only likes to eat kind of at night. It's wild to me when I hear of dogs that are picky eaters. Like Lou today. I put my sandwich down for one second and she like, like a surgeon,

particularly just took the worst part of the sandwich, a little piece of lettuce and just was like, ssss, and pulled it out and then spread it away. That's amazing. You want to eat lettuce, you idiot? Are you kidding? She will literally eat anything. I've had to get cigarettes out of her mouth, piece of paper.

She's starving. If you don't get what Aaron's talking about, Google surgeon takes lettuce. If you didn't go to medical school, you're not going to get it. The persistent in which she're kicking on the same wall. Only surgeons could remove a piece of lettuce from a sandwich. So smooth. If you saw what I saw, Adel, you would've described it exactly the same way.

And that's comforting. Dogs are surgical. As spaghetti is either well trained or terrified, but she will not go for people food, but she will sniff it. She'll get real close and you can go sniff, sniff, sniff, and we'll say, what the fuck are you doing? Get away from that.

You can't know who's off my food. She's like, I was sniffing. It's a crime against sniffing. That's what you pay me to do is I smell the smells. And all of a sudden you don't want me to smell. That's because I'm not poisoned, by the way. Not poisoned. You're welcome.

Sniffing is on my set list. I'm only playing the hits. I think I know, but we gave brisket just randomly, we gave him a little bit of wet food. And now he will shrug off his dry food, and every time we go to the kitchen, he thinks it's feeding time for wet food. So he always goes to the kitchen when we go to the kitchen

and looks at us and mues. And when he doesn't get his wet food, he throws a little fit. But when he doesn't get his wet food, he like throws a little fit. But now he's, yeah, he's, he's, he's, he will not eat his dry food because he's like, I'm not gonna fill up on empty calories because I am a wet food boy only now. I'm a little wet boy.

What any a song do you think played in his head when he tasted wet food for the first time? Sail away. Wait. You can't see, I'm glad I asked you. He close his eyes, he's like, man, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no We could cut that. We could cut that. Because prize was relentless in trash talking Bruce Willis and Howard Gremmis. Blue growled at Sean today when she realized that he wasn't also coming on the walk with us.

Wow. She really hurt, to her, like the pinnacle of joy is when Sean and I both take her for a walk. She starts trotting like a horse and he's zoomies immediately and he was by the door and then he shut the door in her face and she just prowled. That's right. How dare you? And then she was grumpy her whole walk and I was like, hello. When you came back, was Lou sitting on the stairs holding like a half glass of point and it's like, oh, well, well, well, who came home? Dinner's in the free.

Oh, well, well, well, who came home? Dinner's in the free free. Whenever we come home after being gone for a while, it looks like I was gonna die here. She's at the horrible separation anxiety. She thought she was gonna die, and now she knows she's gonna be safe, it's very sad. So for her... She's working on it.

It is like me, Aaron, separation anxiety for a dog. That means they get anxious when you try and pull them apart. Yeah when I try to separate her limbs from her body she's like this is making me a little anxious. No I'm getting a little uncomfortable. She's gotten a lot better but we're working on it. Well if this is your first episode of Hey Rural Riddle I gotta be honest this is kind of what the show is now. Yeah, look, if you're looking for something else, you probably are, but this is what it is, and leave it or love it, okay? Love it or leave it.

We love it at least. We love it at least. Yeah, maybe just keep it cold on and head out if this is too much. We got it. But if you want to sit by the fire. Don't get caught here. Yeah, if you want to sit by the fire and warm up

with some little riddles, we can give you a little bit of that, we can give you a taste. Let's do some warm up riddles. These are gonna be, I mean, these are almost too freaking easy. These are almost riddles for kids, but we'll start with these Just because it's been a little while when Adel says these are almost riddles for kids. These are riddles for kids This is what he's got. He's his brother. It's gonna be When we don't get them right. Oh, yeah, yeah, put us in our place. I get it. I get it. Yeah, all right Put down your chocolate milks.

Here we go. First one, what are the coolest letters in the alphabet? 69, 69. Oh, cool. It's easy. Buddy, we got letters in the alphabet. You say letters in the alphabet? I did, cool.

It's because I am worried about JPC. No, yeah, but I. The coolest letters in the alphabet. I couldn't tell if it was plural or not. That's why I asked. Oh, okay. Let's think about this. So like, exo exo, I mean, obviously, gossip girl. The, that's pretty cool to be-

Because of some of the television show. That big. It could be something like the book C to B, where it's like two letters next to each other, sound like cold or chilly or ice or something something like that. Aaron, you're on a you're on a good track, a very good track. I do want to since we're talking about the coolest letters in the alphabet, I do want to see a quick scene. The two of you are, we'll say like grade school junior high students and there's a spelling bee going on

and you're both trying to participate in this spelling bee but you're both trying to be super cool about it. And I will be the, I wanna say conductor. Ah yeah, conductor, I was gonna say proctor but I don't think that's right either. No, we're not looking at anybody's asshole, do you see? Ha ha ha. All right, the next word for our two finalists, the next word is going to be gravity. Can you use it in a sentence please?

Defying gravity. S-E-X comma D-R-U-G-S comma A and D R-O-C-K and R-O-L Judges? Gravity Okay, I'm being told that's wrong. I'm being told you spell six drugs or echo? It's a classical No, oh, I see what's going on. You're thinking of susical the musical no gravity is from wicked

Thank you Joan that was very nice of you and you can stop winking at the class now All right, let me just light a cigarette and get on my skateboard Oh, she banged her knee real hard and she had a top tray. Oh my God. Ow. Joan, you can go to the nurse if you need to. Roger. Can someone walk me?

I can barely walk. Joan, just sit on your skateboard and just kind of scoot your way along. Kim, push me there. No, because last time I let Kim come with you, what happened? The two of you got arrested. Arrested. That's right. Roger, John actually wants you to stick around because we do need to figure out who's the class spelling B.

Roger, go ahead and try and spell gravity Okay, I guess I mean whatever man Roger it is 110 degrees in this classroom. I can't believe that leather jacket is comfortable. You can't take it off I can't take it up that leather jacket is comfortable you can't take it off. I can't take it off but I can also leave it out. I mean what are we talking about here Mr. S? Take off my jacket I mean come on come on. Up your elbow with the rubber smell bomb Mr. S.

What are the two? What's a tow bird? Hey okay what's going on Mr. S? You got something you need me to solve? Some get a load of this guy. You're acting like my grandpa did. He's dying in World War One. Yeah.

Sorry, that was a teacher joke. That's not very funny if it's real. It went over my head. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Joan, you're 12 years old. Your grandpa didn't even know what Vietnam was you guys are calling me a liar again My mom is Reese with her spoon my grandpa died in world world war one. I was on a famous TV show But the episodes just aren't they're missing from the internet. I hate you guys Hey, come on don't talk to me. I didn't hey, I didn't say nothing you oh

We told you last week we all have Google search result Pings set for whenever There's no place like Joan is revealed on the internet, okay, and when it's on the flyer When the search produces the result we will watch all the episodes in class and you can give a little speech, Joan, okay? Ow, my knee! Hey, I didn't do nothing! My leg is broken!

Can Kim take me outside to make a call? Hey, if you're saying that I glued you, you got another thing coming! I didn't touch this lady's knee! We're passing out actively from heat. Oh, ah, who, ha, what come out? I don't do nothing about it. Roger, did you just reference Jeff Galuli, the guy who hit Nancy Caregit on the knee with a pipe?

Mr. S, you blowing up my spot to cake? Come on. What's the zipper at the top of your hairline? No, no, no, no. Yeah. Who are you? Seed. Seed? Seed.

Does that, well, that... Oh, you can't just say you've seen to get out of telling us who you are. Actually, actually, Jon, he can. S-C-E-N-E-C. Is that Uncle Santa? I'm going home. They can't do the same.

What are the coolest letters in the alphabet? I'll give you a little hint. I think this might help expedite the process. There are two letters we're looking for and they do not come. They're not, I want to say sequential, but they're not back to back. Wait, so the coolest, or is it cold, or like,

it does have to do with cold, yes. Okay, like temperature, they're talking about the coolest. And when you say they do not come, I mean, it could be like a medication that they're taking or it could have been something that they ate. It's tantric that it's tantric It's tantric. Oh, it's it's on purpose like saying gotcha. Oh, I see I and see Aaron you have one of them correct

I but here's what I'll say I see is Technically correct that is a that is a good and great answer and that is legally correct, but you're afraid of me It's great Aaron and that's a great answer. Aaron, I touched. I touched you after every episode. And you never reply. Lou is like, is this? This is a whole thing where you're trying to get me to say CD and then you'll say CD's nuts because I've been there, my friend.

And if you think I'm going to fall for that again, you kind of do my little game. So Aaron, you have one of the letters right and it's the second one. C. It's the coolest letter and it's's see what are the coolest letters in the alphabet and think about when you're at home in the summertime Oh AC air conditioning. Okay, I think I think this is into a rental. Oh, no, I'm sorry I didn't have the full answer up the coolest letters in in alphabet are A-Slee, A-C-Space, S-L-A-T-E-R. Got it, got it, A-Slee.

A-Slee, for your hardware needs. Here we go, let's do another one. This is gonna be a little kind of fun, little warm-up, or it'll, how is a dollar like the moon? It's made of cheese, it has holes in it. Okay, we have to pot, we have to do this. There's only one. We have to do that. No, it's too late, you can't touch me anymore. Okay, we have to pot. There's only one we have today

Too late you can't touch me anymore. Okay. I'm 30 now Less than you have blinked in a year How is it dollar like the moon? How is a dollar like the moon? And moon is spelled M-O-O and there's no trick. Can we in the spelling? It controls the tides. They're both pretty fucking worthless, and by the way. You're both right.

They're both worthless and Aaron, you are correct. A dollar is like the moon because it can help women sync up on their periods. You don't know anything. Oh, I'm not sure. Kind of. dollars like the moon because it can help women sync up on their periods. You don't know anything. Kind of. Let's see because the earth, like money, is what makes the world go around, baby. Legit good answer. But not what we're looking for here.

Is it specific to a dollar bill or would this also apply to like a 10 20 30 30 30 it is 30 dollar bill who would be in the 30 dollar bill. Not like what we want to be who would actually I want to say who Dini cut. I'm so stupid. Jennifer Garner. I'm so fucking stupid to casually talking about the 30 dollar bill. I think truly Aaron I think it would be the all state guy who was the president in 24. I love that guy. He's also he's also a great person. Toronto and Major League. Oh, you know who I put on the $30 bill is the, can you

hear me now guy that was working for Verizon and then switched over to Sprint? I think you love the chaos of that guy. Yeah, I do. I do. I do. I love that guy's like, I love that guy. Yeah. I do. I truly do. I love that guy. He's like, I love it. I love it. I had one role and it was like, I'm in this Verizon campaign that ran forever. He probably made a good deal of money on it. And when it ended, he was like, well, that was, it was a good run. Like I did a good run on the, can you hear me now, think? And then 10 years later, Sprint was like, you want to do it again?

And he was like, what is my life? What is my life? That guy probably has his own little island. I love it. I love it. Good for him. Him and flow from progressive are just probably private planes, little islands. I'll kind of nasty shit. They're getting up to, hey, good for them.

They did a commercial firm. I'm sure it's company or a cell phone. So, to answer your question, JBC, this is very specific to one dollar. Okay. And you should think about the probably best way to approach this is to answer a question, JBC, this is very specific to one dollar. Okay. And you should think about the probably best way to approach this is to think about what goes into a dollar, what can poses a dollar. Got it.

So you can kind of reverse engineer it from there. Is it something about coins or like four quarters? Yes, four quarters. There you go. That's it. They both have four quarters. Wait, the moon, I'm sorry, help me out here. The moon has four quarters. No, I you go. That's it. They both have four quarters. Wait the moon. I'm sorry help me out here. The moon is four quarters. No I'm sorry. This is how's it all like an NBA game. Oh shit

Wait, wait, was it the moon? What's up? Was it was it the moon? Was it how's it all like the moon? Yeah, they both have four quarters What does that mean? The quarters of a moon what are the quarters of a moon? Okay, so there's the full moon. Yeah, there's a half moon. There's a crescent moon. And there's no moon. I'm not exactly going out with her hand. I chose it with my hands. I'm sorry, but there's also a ton more. It's not like it goes from one to the other. There's just four different types of food that you can have. I've never heard of one of these in the mood.

Please can have some. Here you go ahead, sincerity called one. Right. And I'm terrified of you. Thank you. That's kind of. Thank you. Okay, so I want to see a scene.

A JPC you've lived on the moon for quite some time. Okay. Adel, you're an astronaut going there and you're sort of coming upon. A JPC is living situation on the moon for quite some time. Okay. Adel, you're an astronaut going there and you're sort of coming upon a JPC's living situation on the moon. That's one small step for mankind. Yes, yes, yes, very big day for you. Very big day for you. One step for mankind.

One step on my porch. How? You're on my porch. One step on my porch. Yes, the moon is my home I must have died I died in the Take you know what if you peel because your space if you puke in your space suit that is nothing to be I do not care if you puke in that space suit But if you take that helmet off and you get puke on my moon, we will have words

How are you up here without any sort of protective gear or helmet yourself? Oh, that's a very good question. It's a very earth-ling centric question. I am, of course, an alien. I breathe out of space. Houston, I have contact with the moon tonight. That's the name I've made up on the spot. No. No. Yeah, I told you to only use this line if you had something important to say. Okay. Sarah, Sarah Houston, my ex-girlfriend, please. I know. I'm on the moon. Please be impressed. You

No, you do not tell me that I'm a moon and I do not choose my name for me. You do not do that You are on my moon. You know what I think you are. I'm gonna make a name for you Fuck earth. I already said it's Jerry. Yeah Well, okay, fine Jerry get off my moon Well, I can't I can't do that. I'm I'm here to push the boundaries of what mankind is capable of and Navata know there's life on the moon. I can't simply walk away. I must let's see what is my self kind Capable of rudeness. I will say that is the the human race capable? Well, that's even... Oh, is... Ah, boy, how do I...? No, don't... don't act like you're representing Earth. You're representing humans.

Get... Deer did not tell you to come up here and step all over my moon. That's fair, yes. A beluga whale did not say, Pugh, can you helmet up there? That's what a conversation that was had? That's not a conversation that was had. So you seem to start track, do I? Yes, I'm a big fan of some specific parts of Earth culture, but I'm not a fan of unannounced visitors,

rudeness, stepping, and dirty sneakers on my moon. What, what is your name? My name is penis. I understand. That is, and you're like, when? Houston, Houston, Houston. Once, I, once again, I just, just I had to I have to jot something out Sure, yeah, I'm on a date Jerry. What do you need what I'm on a date? Who is it Clark?

Is it Clark? Yeah my twin brother? Yes He's so funny. Oh my twin brother. What do you need something? I know I'm at work and I am Houston's air Houston works as I know on that work cut and I am Houston's air Houston works as a student work. I don't okay listen. Hey, he bought me a picnic He bought you a pic. Listen. I don't have to I'm on I'm on the moon and I just met a moon and I called penis Tell her it means bravery in our language. He said it means bravery in the moon and I language. It doesn't it doesn't but tell her because It doesn't it means doesn't, but tell her because it doesn't, it needs butthole that I like with. He said you gotta come here, this is the fun, you say I'm not funny, this is the funniest thing I've ever experienced. Hold on.

This little guy named penis. Did you just invite someone else up here? Are you not listening? What, what's wrong? There's so much room here. There is now, but as soon as people start coming up, there's not gonna be as much room. Sorry Sorry my ex is eating her linguine on our picnic Cancel this

Cancel me with all the podcasts. Oh God. It's funny that Adelsonsett is character's name was Jerry because I was just playing George Costanza in that seat. I think subconsciously I knew that. Yeah, you're like, Jerry, I really want to go like Jerry. So everybody now. Do you guys know that TikTok trend where women will stitch videos of guys having podcasts talking about how like why women suck and they'll stitch it and then take the microphone away from them and walk away and glare. Just like get microphone away from them. I felt like so much had come and grabbed my microphone away from me.

When I said, ooh, linguine. I think I should have lose the privilege of being able to talk into a microphone after that. I'm willing to step away. I get it. I think you're watching Too Much TikTok. I think you're watching Too Much TikTok. I think you're watching Too Much TikTok. And you just, you gotta know,

nobody should be taking Aaron's microphone, okay? You got good stuff to say. And Linguin is some of the best stuff you've ever had. It's not the best stuff you've ever had. Aaron, in a scene where there was a moon and night named penis and it meant butthole, you were the least offensive thing. You guys are my imaginary friends. Of course you're gonna tell me I'm smart.

In a scene where an astronaut, and a scene where an astronaut was talking to his ex-seraheustine, you were the least silly thing. You two two figments in my imagination. Of course you're gonna be on my side, but I think the public is gonna feel differently Okay, I'm ready for more medals. I think we got to do almost like Garfield without Garfield We got to do an episode this Aaron without without jbc and at all. No, who said why I wouldn't show up Okay, so would you do that? Would you do that for me on my birthday? Show up and do an episode by myself. Yes, for my birthday episode. You would give 10 minutes.

Off, no, it has to be an hour. Okay, fine, I'll do an hour long. It's just going to be me memorizing the JPC guided meditation that was on the page. I'm doing it for me. And Aaron from my birthday, can we do a HeyRdle restaurant pop-up and the only dish we serve is umlanguini sea. Yes of course. And then a poison drinks

that you have to pee out the poison. What else would be on the menu? I would love to do a pop-up and serve poison drinks. I'm sure Hamas's women would be up the women's hummus would there. Little monkey bone broth. Uh, monkey bone broth. I promise. All right, look, look, look, we obviously have a lot of recipes to create. So why don't we just step away,

take a little break, create some recipes, and come back with some, um, linguine. JPC. Uh huh. Absolutely, we should do that, but we're a frequency of Aaron's imagination. That's true. We have to convince Aaron to step away figments of Aaron's imagination. That's true. We have to convince Aaron to step away.

Oh, that's yeah, that's right. Aaron, do you want to go to ads? Mm, linguini. One, two, three, four, eight, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick, Rick JPC you know how I love he looks sleep. I love that he looks mattress brand. Yeah, sleep of my life. I know not everyone is on board yet. So I secured a word winning sleeper. Merrill sleep. She's right behind that door. Merrill sleep. Wow. She won the golden pillow for best sleep. That's right.

Hey, Merrill. Hello, yes, hello, yes, I'm very well rested after sleeping on my midnight lux, Helix mattress. Good to see you. Good to see you. Your naps are stunning. I just wanted you to tell people about Helix sleep, how the Helix lineup offers 20 unique mattresses, including the award-winning lux collection. The newly released Helix Elite collection, a mattress designed for big and tall sleepers, even a mattress made just for kids. Yeah, and Helix knows there's no better way to test out a new mattress than by sleeping on it in your own home. That's why they offer a 100-night trial in a 10 to 15-year warranty to try out the new Helix mattress. Who do you, who, who did I think you were? I don't know. I'm Meryl Sleep and I know everybody is unique and everybody

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It was even recommended by multiple leading chiropractors and doctors of sleep medicine. Shh. I don't think I thought you were the person that you were. Oh, she's doing it. Who are, what a performance. Helix mattresses all come with a 10 to 15 year warranty depending on the model. Oh, stunning.

Yeah, look, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helixsleep.com slash riddle. This is their best offer yet and it will not last long with helix better sleep starts now go ahead and give her the academy a snorr the snorr Academy a snorr you know what you mean the academy is gnaw it's close to falling asleep that's why oh yeah I got that a lot hey Adel hey Aaron I got a bone to pick with the two of you.

Sure, yeah, I wore the skeleton outfit just because I figured this was coming. Happy Halloween a few months early. It's not yet the... What is it? So you know how the two of you, I was like, guys, I am always so hungry for lunches and dinners and the like and you, jokers told me oh JPC it's okay all you have to do is take some you know American paper currency tape it to your front door close the door and then wait until someone brings you food while I kept opening the door and the money was gone so I had to

tape more money to my door I think you think you didn of working all. Oh, door cash. Dore Cash. Yeah, you did dore cash. We told you dore dash is the number one thing to you. What the hunk? With dore dash, you'll enjoy next level convenience with delivery in the hour, making it easier than ever to get whatever you want delivered to your house, whether that be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I eat back to school supplies.

But what? JPC, all your favorite retail, grocery, and convenience stores are on the app, so you can chop everything, your kids, your dogs, your family, might need for back to school. And hey, personally, just yesterday, I bought some marshes homemade premium quality buck eyes, you know those candies that are chocolate stuff with peanut butter.

I just got those from DoorDash and they were on my porch within 20 minutes and it's very dangerous because they're delicious. Did you fill your belly and your pantry? Uh, yes. Did you fill your backpack? I did. Okay, well then DoorDash has come again for the gold. I remember distinctively the stress of going back to school and going from store to store to get all my favorite snacks and pencils and pencil cases and all the things that I needed me and my siblings and I remember how stressed my mom was and I

know that she would have loved to have DoorDash so she could be prepared before the big back to school day arrived. So you can stock up with go-to breakfast, lunchbox staples, and brands that you love. Don't eat my school supplies JPC. CBC, put that eraser down. Put that trapper keeper down, your mouth is too small. Never been told that before.

Shop DoorDash to get everything you need for the back to school season delivered right to your door. Order now for stress free back to school shopping. Use promo code RIDDLE to get 50% off up to $10 value. When you spend $15 or more at convenience, grocery, or retail stores on DoorDash, that's 50% off up to a $10 value. When you spend $15 or more, promo code RIDDLE, don't forget JPC because you keep eating those school supplies. That's code RIDDLE for 50% off your next order term supply. At all. JPC keeps eating my gel pens.

Thanks, DoorCash. I mean, no, that's the one. That one didn't work. That one's bad. Hey, JPC. Uh, yeah. You're not in trouble. I just need help.

I'm, um, pranking Atal, and I'm setting up a website to prank him. Um, I just need help. I'm Prinking at all and I'm setting up a website to Pring him. I just need some advice. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. I'm not I'm not mad at you. We're pranking at all. Squarespace is the only one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out agency online whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website engaged with your audience. And so let me think for products that cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms.

Hey, Addle, come here, come here, come here. Hey, what's going on? I actually, I wanna prank JPC and I wanna set up a whole website to prank him. Do you have anything that like like is there like an online store? Like it set up on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace, you can have custom merch. You can easily sell custom merchant, create passive income stream that engages

your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production and inventory and shipping are handled for you, saving you time and money. What is happening? Okay. Wait, what's going on with Addle? Oh, nothing, nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal Squarespace website, not a prank thing. No, he's gonna shoot you. And I'm gonna use analytics. Use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool.

I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my Prank website, the Prank's activity. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for? I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. Prank.

Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Thirdirt Party tools to extend the functionality of your website. Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, Vattle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine. Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase

of a website or domain. Oh, she's back, she's back. Hey, Aaron. Hey, Aaron. Can we go to grandma's house? Wait, I've been pranked. But how? I don't know.

Hey, Rick, come back. I have an update. I have an update. What's up? There has been a ceasefire. The war has been called off after two short days. I got a text. Mariah has eaten spaghetti food. Congratulations, everybody. What have I went up there and she had eaten spaghetti food? She's's like this is the only wish alert Where by when she's just like licking her lips and like Her spaghetti sauce up her fingers dragged her ass out of bed went back to the bowl ate her full dinner And Mariah says oh no, she's frisky. So now she wants to play but it's because she ate all of her food So she lost

Mariah and I won. All it took. Congratulations. All it took is a union of fresh. Canas, we potatoes poured over her food. I don't want to be dramatic. This is akin to the freaking Berlin wall being dismantled. It's true. It's the end of an era. Now I will say we will fight this battle,

middie, middie, middie, middie, more times like tomorrow, for instance, we'll be fighting it. But for now, both sides have come away with belly's full, hearts clear, and eyes with narrateer. Huh, I never saw that episode of Friday Night Lights. Now, I know we all just ate a buffet dinner, but let's get out there and play football.

That was so beautiful. That was so beautiful. The greenie scene. Okay, let's get back into, it out there and play football. That is so beautiful. That is so beautiful. That is so beautiful. The greenie scene. Okay, let's get back into maybe a few more riddles. Oh, that is actually, I'm actually game for that. Yes, and second half of the episode, I'm always like really ready to do a million riddles. So do as many as you want.

The pump is primed, Aaron is ready. Here we go. Two in a corner, one in a room, zero in a house, but one in a shelter. What am I? Cool table. Two in a corner, angles. Nice shelter with a pool table. Door.

You said angles? Yeah, two in a corner, one in the room. What is, give me more? I want to see a scene real quick. Okay. Aaron, you're in your house and for the first time ever standing in the corner, you notice an angle which is an angel who has yet to receive its wings played by JPC. What is Becca Cotton?

Is it a cobwebs? Sorry, sorry. I'm not the Boba Duke. Holy shit, you look a lot like the Boba Duke. It's first of all the Boba Duke is a AI card. I love his style and so I am dressed like the Boba Duke, but I am an angle. Hello. My name is Kurt.

Did you say angel? Ah, so you've heard of my kind. No, I am an angel. They say that once angels get their wings, but really we just get our easter- else switched around. When I do get my wings, I will become an angel. For now I am an angel, wingless. That is why the Bob and Duke outfit does kind of work

because with wings I think it would take away from it. But hi, I am Kurt, and welcome to me. I guess it's Ash on tape. Are you here with me because of the email I sent my sister when she was in college, when I was in fifth grade and she was a freshman in college, and I was sending her really long emails because I missed her, and in one of them I said,

I'm going to be, guess what I'm going to be for Halloween an angle Because I didn't know how to spell angel and then it made her laugh so hard that she printed it out and then printed out several copies And they were hanging in bunch of people's rooms on her floor and it became like a comedy thing for her floor This is perfect. Yes Wow, it yeah, of course I am. It usually takes people way longer to get there. Again, sorry about 20 years later. We are so backed up there.

But- Seems like the world's kind of- Pfft. Okay, I'm just one angle. I'm just one angle, okay. That's the world. I can do everything. Anyway, I am down here to the end to-

Okay, I'm talking here. I mean, don't hurt noises, it's making me laugh. Sorry, my bad person, Mr. Engle. No, I just, I did say 20 years, so maybe you should be a little, uh, past that word. Pot calling the kettle really. I'm here to make you make amends with your sister so that you can put everything back together. I can get my wings, I can get my L and my E swapped, and then I can go back up to heaven. That's great, sounds like sort of a u-thing.

Oh, I guess I get to make up with my sister. Yeah, you haven't spoken to your sister in what, like, 20 years ever since that incident, right? You have well not in a way where I trust her to not make fun of me for spelling things wrong. Of course, yeah, I mean, we all have our little run-ins. I trust me, I have so many brothers. For example, I don't think she would think that this is funny Me making fart noises with my mouth. Addle would think it's funny

But my sister's okay. I don't have time to learn all about your life and like every fast and every relationship So it's just stick to the sister stuff Why don't you give her a call and then I will are you familiar with the Why don't you give her a call and then I will are you familiar with the C.O.N.O. Diversia, Diversia, Diversia, Diversia? Yeah, the guy talking from the bushes to Yeah, I mean the play that what I should say they've seen they haven't I should just say Roxanne or the truth about cats and dogs because these are the Reference and then you know have much easier to pronounce than Cereo Diversia or Nacker whenever can I ask you question? You're keep looking at your watch.

You're obviously a huge rush. You don't have to be my guardian angel too long. Are you going to a costume party, like a Halloween party dressed as the Babadook? And that's why you want to be a guy. There is an angle Halloween party that I am going to. It's in two hours. I think I have time to do your thing.

Here's the thing I'd love to show up with wings. The costume I know I said works without it, but it does it. I just, it's just, I'm supposed to be Boba Duke Angel, okay? You're being a little obtuse. Okay. Yeah, I can see why your sister did the thing that she did. Mm, Linguini scene.

Hey. Okay. Casey, that is the perfect scene to take out all of JPC's dialogue and just let a Erin's audio shine Fargo is this and making herself a guy guys. I'm kitchen Aaron now Closet Aaron is gone. I'm kitchen Aaron. I'm funny in this room. Oh, we got a kitchen Aaron mixer one year It was it was great. It was good didn't break too fast To a corner to in a corner one in a room zero in a house, but one in a shelter what?

I vowels You're not far off ours are The letter R, there's two in the corner. One in the word room, zero in the house, one in a shelter, very nice job. I was very far off with vowels because there are two and most of those words, huh? But you were thinking of the right,

I was thinking of alphabet, which was right in the wheelhouse. That was nice. I'm having a really nice time. We hadn't recorded it in like a week. I'm happy to be here. I know. Yeah, it's been it's been more than a week. It's been like 12 days or something. I'll be honest. It's been four hours. Oh, we recorded this morning, but we were recording. I was in a wake for that.

I was asleep. That's when I was asleep. But now I'm here and now I'm awake and I have consciousness and I'm enjoying this. And listen, I'm ready for the show. I'm ready for the show. I'm ready for the show. I'm ready for the show. I'm ready for the show. Now I'm here and now I'm awake and I have consciousness and I'm enjoying this. And listen, I'm ready for the show.

And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show.

And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I'm ready for the show. And listen, I listened to that episode. They're like, I understood every word she said. What are we talking about? Just passionately talking about a Nickelodeon movie.

What makes a loud noise when changing its jacket becomes larger but ways less? So this is something that makes a loud noise when it changes its jacket. It also becomes larger but somehow ways less. A its jacket. It also becomes larger, but somehow weighs less. A yellow jacket. That is the hit TV show on Showtime. Have you ever taken a be apart? Have you ever taken a be apart? It's truly a wonder.

Whoa, hold on, excuse me. Have I ever taken a be apart? Yeah, just taken a be apart. I was never an angry 11 year old boy, so no, I don't know. No, no, no, no, you know, bees are made of parts, right? And you could take them apart. Is there a minute? I was going to say a minor key for bees, but then I was like, Adel, it's minor bees. My little secret, it's not a secret. James, just a little interest that I have. I really love bees.

I think bees are really awesome. Bees are wonderful. They do get a bad wrap. Because of the sting. Because of the stinging. But here's how, here's how noble they are. These are really awesome. These are wonderful. They do get a bad rap. Cause of this thing. Cause of this stinging. But here's how noble they are. When they sting you accidentally, they're like, I am so embarrassed. I did just fucking die.

That's it. That's like Midwest. These are the most Midwest animal. The most Midwest creature of all time. I'm so fucking embarrassed. Let me just die. So as to not bother you further. Oh, you go ahead. creature all time. Sorry about that. So fucking embarrassed. Let me just die. So is to not bother you further.

Well, you go ahead. No, I mean, I do think that these are super interesting just with like the whole like hive mind. I love the idea that they worship at the feet of their queen. I there are many. They have a copy. Love that. They have they work really well together.

They communicate in ways we can't even understand They know where they carry honey I just think they're like into flowers and they make artisan honey like gorgeous love it. Yeah They're outstanding and also like people also confuse like bees and wasps as well And it's like wasps. That's a completely different fucking type of bug right like that with we can say fuck wasps wasps make it honey what They do it shit do you guys know that butterflies can't see their wings What they don't know how pretty they are why am I crying? I know I'm really sorry I couldn't carry that information on my own and now I need you know Aaron is that what that one direction song is about

Probably butterfly is this what that crazy town song is about? Probably. Is this what that crazy town song is about? Yeah, it is. Don't know the full. Isn't that horrible? Anyways, I'm ready for round. That's horrible. Can you read it again? I'll try through the tears.

What makes a loud noise when, hold on, no, I want to see a scene. I've broken it. We have to, we have to, this is therapy through improv. The guy who's in charge of reading the riddles keeps calling for seeds, which seems unfair. Like, I can't read a riddle. My job. He's taking everybody's jobs here. I can't just suddenly be like, I'll start reading a riddle. I would as a seed. I get just something to be like, I'll start reading a riddle. I would say a seed.

JPC, you are some sort of insect, maybe a bee or yellow jacket. Aaron, you are a butterfly. Okay. And JPC, you are absolutely blown away and astounded by how beautiful this butterfly's wings are. Aaron, you sadly cannot see your own wings. Gotcha. Your own beauty. Hey, um, can I have a jack-in-coke, please? Oh my god, um...

I'm sorry, um... You're just... You're just so beautiful. Hey, dude, I actually can't handle the sarcasm today. I've had a really rough time. Um... Yeah, you could have a jack-in-coke. Uh...

Hey, Brian? Yeah. Uh, this is Brian. Brian is a, uh, he's a praying mantis. Um... Brian, this is what was your name? Aw, father. What? I didn't have him. He's training to be a priest, but, uh, I'm trying to...

I'm trying to knock him out of him. I think if he meets a person like you, you might help my... Can you help my friend out, please? Yeah, what's your friend's problem? Oh, my... My, um, my name's Monarch. Um, I was born like an hour ago. Uh, dude, this is your friend's problem? My my name's monarch. I was born like an hour ago

Dude, this is your embarrassing me. He's way out of my league She's not my drinking piece Brian Brian. This is monarch monarch. This is Brian. Oh my freaking lord, and I don't say that lightly I don't take the Lord's name in vain, but did my mom call you before I came in here She knows I've been feeling really insecure. Like it's just so annoying because like I started as a worm, right? And I'm like eating and eating and like I'm eating

in the leaves. And then I was like so tired. Oh my God, I got so tired and I made myself like a little sleeping bag and I was just like sleeping. And then when I got out I was like this is a little, and then I came out and then I'm flying and I'm like this is cool love to fly she's annoying never she's annoying oh my god just because I'm talking about myself fuck you man I just was opening up to you first time in my

whole hour-long life I opened up to someone and they tell me I'm annoying oh my god listen I can't I can't I, I can't, I can't, I can't, Kim, can you walk me out? Hold on, I can't date an hour year old. Do you know how bad that looks? If I date an hour year old, if I am out in the town, we go see a movie and I'm arm and arm with an hour year old, do you know how bad I would get dragged?

My wife would eat my head. Oh, I spoke, I said too much. Okay, okay, still sucks that you called me annoying. You know, I gotta just have my jack-and-cog to go, please. I gotta help other customers. I'm sorry, but it's a- I haven't even given me your my drink yet. It's a Saturday night.

I have a Halloween party tonight. I can't, I can't. When you spilled water, now I can see my reflection. Say hello, say hello, say hello,, Saloo way, Saloo way. Mmm, like we're gonna say, I'm beautiful. Saloo way, Saloo way. You guys were so mean to that butterfly. That was therapy.

Fuck you guys, what the hell man? Oh my god. It was like a weird. If you're a bartender, your job is just to listen to everything anyone has to say. My friends who are bartenders, I'm fascinated by the fucking shit that people tell them. I don't think I've ever laid my guts down to a bartender before, but it is wild how people treat them like therapists. Oh yeah. I've never done that, but I know.

There's a community of people where they drink at they drink at like one, like their bar flies, like they go to the same bar every time and they develop that relationship where they're like, this is my church, this is my therapy, this is my friend group, this is everything. I think it's called cheers. I mean, even in the improv community with bartenders that were friends of mine that I knew,

I still would like, I was like, don't bother with their work, just give them their, just give them their money It let's yeah, yeah Exactly people who did bartend at like CIC or annoyance or I.O Yeah, the shit they have seen and heard is crazy Also one of them open up to me about which improvisers tip and which don't and It's also it is a. I was, I was talking to a friend of mine.

Non-surprising. We'll remain, uh, uh, nameless, who is a bartender and a bartender at an improv theater and they were talking about like this younger generation of improvisers and it's especially wild because of COVID, there's like a whole younger generation of improvisers that like didn't even have classes or had like weird online classes

and just like did not have the same experience, same experience that I had. But I was very interested in tipping and I was like, how are they tipping? How are these? Are they good? These young improvisers are tipping. And my friend was like, yeah, they're really great. They're like surprisingly, they're all very good and they know. Most of them tip a dollar drink or whatever, which is kind of standard, especially if you're having a PBR or whatever at a bar and I was like, that's really cool. I was very worried about that next gin. There's one time I forgot to leave a tip at IO and I think about it three times a day. Well, you know who else thinks about it three times a day is the bartender in his life you're ruined.

I know. Let's see here, what makes a loud noise when changing its jacket? I already know it. What is it? Let's move on. I don't need to say it. Well, freaking, give me a, give me a,

Oh, what? Now I have to start saying the answers to the riddles. If I know it, we should just move up. Snake, hermit crab, um. We're in here looking at a recipe. Oh, yeah, this is for the potion. I'm going to make later, but it occurs on you. Um, let's see. What makes a loud noise when changing its jacket becomes larger, but weighs less. Um, the loud noise, I think, is very helpful. That's a very good. The changing its jacket is really sneaky, really silly, like just a balloon, a gun.

By the way, yeah, it's on a ball. It's on a gun. It's close. This is edible. This is something edible. Oh, really? Is it really something edible? It is something edible.

It's an animal. Okay, I think the loud noise is your biggest clue. So think about foods that make loud noises. Cause a bullet, a bullet works. A bullet satisfies all of those things. I think that loud noise is your biggest clue. So think about foods that make loud noises. Crab butt. A bullet works. A bullet satisfies all of those things. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Yum. You lose the jacket, it expands and gets less, and it gets lighter because it's shedding its jacket. Sure. But the slug is spreading out. So. And you could definitely need a bullet. And it's a loud noise.

So a bullet. Your grandpa and old were war ate a bullet. And it's a loud noise. So a bullet. Your grandpa in the World War A to bullet. There's nothing in this riddle about eating it. Coconut. Is it a fruit or vegetable or what kind of food is it? It's not a fruit or vegetable. Again, the best thing I can give is loud noise. And I would say this is more, this is very much a,

it is a natural food. Like it's not, to some degree, it's a natural food. But it's more snacky. It's more something that you would eat in between meals. This is like a peanut, not far off. Oh, you crack it, oh, it's a little, and it's in the thing, it's in the shell, and then you open it. Stasio.

Stasio? Edimame. Edimame, too. Edimame. Stasio and peanut start with the correct letter, but is incorrect. Is it a pecan? It's not a nut.

But that's closer than anything we've had so far, Crablix. What makes a lot of noise when changing its jacket becomes larger but weighs less? So I will say this is a food but popcorn. It is popcorn. popcorn. I get popcorn. Okay. I get nice one. I want to see a scene.

I still think it should have been bullet. Bullet works. Bullet works. Triple Suspense. Triple Suspense. I want to see a scene. JPC, you were at the movie theater, seeing whatever movie of your choice you would like to be watching.

Aaron, you are a piece of popcorn on top of the bag, and you are trying to make sure JPC doesn't eat you and you're trying to just stall JPC as long as you can before you are eaten. Oh wow I really wanted to see this film for a really long time. Yeah me too. I'm really excited to watch this whole thing to the end. Yeah me too. Um this is yeah I've heard really great things about this.

Yeah could you prop me up on the seat next to you just so I can get a better look? Me too. Um, this is yeah, I've heard really great things about this Um, the seats really dirty next to me. That's fine. Ah, shh. Shhh, fuck you, god. Don't, hey, come on, try to watch the fuck. What the fuck? You got a problem, buddy? Uh, no, I'm sorry. I don't, I'm just trying to enjoy the movie. I apologize. Um, I apologize to him. We're all trying to watch 14 dresses.

The sequel. Prequel. Prequel. The break-well, thank you. You can sprinkle since the late brain. Yeah. Uh, yeah. So, why don't I move? I'm gonna move. I'm gonna move seats. Uh, so I don't disturb you any further. Yeah, I'll stay here. I'll stay here. No, no, you come with me.

You come with me, I'll be with you. No, so. Because I'm gonna eat you later, so I don't want you to be on a seat or to like left anywhere else. I'm like covered in butter. It's like gross. Yeah, you're the best one. I'm gonna do it.

Throw, no, no. What do you mean covered in butter? That's great. Yeah, and it's, I'm gonna set my butter in foil. I'm doing milk to it. Should we go back and get some milk to it? Skittles, chisels? I don't need anything else.

Shh, not just. Excuse me. I'm here with my... What, did your popcorn just shush me? Um, yes, and no, and I apologize, and I'm... We're all trying to enjoy the movie. I apologize to you. Come on, man. Let's do that.

You have my daughter. Do I need to get a manager? Um, no, I actually have the manager here and I apologize so why don't you know what I am I'm just gonna move to I'm just gonna stand up The the entryway and I'm just gonna watch the movie stand. Yeah, you should just leave me here But that would piss them off one night. You're coming. I'm in I just was being here. I'm like, no, no You ruined movies for me. You ruined movies for me. You should probably throw me out.

Get me out of here. I'm being nuisance. I'm a worse cop. I'm going to eat you. No. And we all know I'm going to eat you. And the next time I sit down at a movie theater, you're going to show back up again. And because I pushed a wizard. and I knew I shouldn't have done

it but he was moving so slow and I wanted a crack of the drinking button. We cut to that scene. Just have to get up this hill. Come on. It's not a hill. It's a step to a drinking fountain. It's not a hill. This is my staff is a cane. I'm a little short staffed. My staff is a little short staffed. My staff is a little short staffed. Excuse me, sir. Can I just move? Can I just go around you? Can I just go to the drinking room?

You shall not. No. Around me. Push. Ah! Zap. Yeah, that was her died. He's like a bee.

There's one person who dies. And now I'm here. Please don't eat me. I'm going to destroy your stomach, man. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't.

I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't.

I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't.

I don't. I don't. I don. And I'll tell you how it ends. She buys all the dresses, okay? Fuck you. I've seen it. I've seen the movie before. That's so shitty, dude. You know what? I'm just one little popcorn.

I'm sorry. If the dream to work in cinema. You're right. And you're gonna make me go inside the chest work. Just so gross inside your stomach. It's so gross. Okay, come on. You need to drink more water and less coffee and we both know that. We're just so gross inside your stomach. It's so gross. Okay, come on. You need to drink more water and less coffee,

and we both know that. You're anxiety is mostly that, pal, okay? Okay, look, I'm not looking for a diagnosis here. I'm not sure. Wow. And as the fight escalates, we smash cut to JPC's apartment. You're both laying in bed.

Piece of popcorn, you have the covers up to your neck. And JPC, you're smoking a cigarette naked. The line between love and hate is very close, isn't it? We do this dance every Friday night. Don't wait popcorn. We do indeed. How about I eat you this time? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I feel my feel my head no blood. Oh, no, I feel down my pants

Take my hand out melted butter So it wasn't a dream Aaron, do you have anything to meow about I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that.

I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that.

I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not a superhero episode that hopefully we're getting close to right about now. We recorded with six guests for it.

It's one of my favorite things I've ever done for the show. And if you want to listen to that, patreon.com slash he riddle riddle. And also follow us at comdnd on Twitter and Instagram. Adults episode for that should be coming out soon. Whoo. Whoo. Addle anything to plug Adults, anything to plug? Adults, anything to plug?

Thank you both. Yes, I want to plug. I recently did an episode of Escape this podcast. Friends of the show, I think we've been on twice before. Very fun. Oh yeah, yeah, very fun time. We have those times. I recently went back on and did an episode with Janet

Morph herself, Janet Varney, and we escaped a room where we were both playing dogs, and we had to escape sort of a, it wasn't, it was like a veterinarian office kind of thing, it just like a dog clinic. Very, very fun time. So please check that out again. It's called Escape this podcast, and you can check out our previous episodes with the three of us, the three hosts, and now with our fourth host, Janet Varney. Also, please check out our previous episodes with the three of us, the three hosts and now with our fourth host, you know, Barney Also, please check out the restricted section podcast, which is a blast. I just recently went on there and oh the other thing I went to The two other things I would have mentioned one is if you're a fan of comedy, please check out a book written by Bob Odin Kirk He has a biography out now called comedy comedy comedy drama, which I'm not yet done with yet But it is fantastic so far.

And then also, while I was on vacation, Aaron texted me in the middle of the night and screaming at me to watch a show called Severance, and now I am obsessed. It is so good. It is the most like beautifully shot, so dry, so interesting, so funny, yet like fascinating TV show I've maybe ever seen. I highly,

highly recommend. I'm not all the way caught up, but Severance Aaron, thank you for that wreck and I want to pass along to everyone. Adel, that was one of my favorite moments of our friendship. I texted you truly like 1130 at night. You dropped what you were doing and immediately put on Severance and I was like, wow, this guy rules. This is amazing. He trusts me so much. And our text, he was like, I know you haven't watched a show, but you have to watch it because in the newest episode, something happens that I want to talk to you about it. And I made a joke and I go, does Severance show up?

And Error is like, yes, I'm trying to trick you into watching Waiting for Gado. And then I watched some Severance, and then I read an article about the creator, and it said he based the TV show on Waiting for Gado. And I'm like, this is amazing. Oh, lots of interesting stuff. Yeah, we have sort of an accident. And I believe it's all out now and I think it's Apple TV, right? Apple TV. Yeah. So it's how you watch it. Do you have you, have you watched any? I have not seen any of it yet. I didn't see anything you'd like to

plug. Sure. You know, it's, it's very rare that I actually have the schedule done, but if you are listening to Bill Buds at all this month, you can hear us listen to, I think Lady Gaga's Joanne, Rex Orange County's pony at the Orville Peck's album, which is also called Pony, Johnny and I accidentally picked two albums called Pony, two of a month. What about you, hey?

And yet it's about June 1. And the soundtrack to a video game called Boyfriend Dungeon, which I played on stream, Twitch.tv, Slashark, Barkman, and I really enjoyed. You can listen to that. It's at Bill Buds, Pod. You can find us anywhere that you find podcasts, Aaron. We know really quick, Joanne.

Yeah. You haven't recorded that yet? Yeah, absolutely. So, Mirror on the Sealing, that song, I forget what it's called, A-O or something. A-O, yes. Track two. I think that might be my favorite Lady Gaga song. Oh, that is one of Lady Gaga. It's like a straight-up dance song. And it's about one of my favorite pieces of subject matter, which is having sex with Lady Gaga. Yeah. Let's look at what the song is about.

It's just heard describing describing, having sex. I just can't believe that song never blew up because it's so good. Um, yeah, that's, I mean, that is, it's amazing how an album that came out, uh, maybe one month before the 2016 presidential election didn't really have as much cultural stay power. I wonder what else was going on in the world. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm.

I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm I'm I'm I'm gonna be there, I'm gonna be there on the sale and I am. I am, I'm just all crying. I'm gonna be there. Lady Gaga and I were once, we were once, you know, we're sleeping together and she rolled over and she goes, what do you want? And I go, do what you want, what you want to my body.

And she just went wild. And I think she stole that for a song lyric. And then I said, what, I was sleeping here. I'm on the edge of the floor. Jupiter, thanks. Uh, well, can I not do one? Okay, I'm working one at once Yeah, take, cut out the same theme song, cut out the theme song

I wanted to know, keep it in, just like, just know that I was also gonna do one Where? Well, I, what is it? She was wearing that meat dress that I said, you know that dress would look better on my grill I mean, floor That's good I don't know, that was good I better at my grill. I mean, floor. That's good. I don't know. I don't know.

It just plays. It's a theme can come back in. Jupiter is a piper ever. I play the song. Do you have another one? Okay, so you cut it out again. Cut out the music. Do you have more?

What was it? I don't know. I mean, like, Oh, I have one. Okay, go ahead. This is one, actually, it's your story, but I'll tell it. Sure. You said that you and Lady Gaga were once having intercourse.

And you dressed, well, she was just known as Lady. And she was like, what do you want to role play as? And you said, Google Gaga. And then she was like, got it. You used that and you said, Lady, Google, I don't think so. I just know the other one. Okay.

And then I, she said, you're so good at sex. And then I said, I live for the applause. And then. Oh, gotcha. Casey put the theme song back there. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Was she, hold on, was Lady Gaga in telephone? Yes, that's, yeah, she called me on a telephone one

strings, we had fun sex telephone. I have one, I have one for poker face, but I don't want to say it, so let's just say yep. Do it, Casey. Perth is a goppy, Casey. I don't have a hat on. Uh, go. Don't be too busy editing.

We have already parented the music. Oh, no. Motocreated by Emily Cardamus and Emily Nemora. You're not too big for a hit. Riddle, Riddle, Riddle. Hey there, roms and comms! If you like that, you are gonna love this week's Patreon. We returned to our classic brackets, but this time, Adelaide Aaron have to team up and work together. You can listen to that plus our entire Batcadilog at patreon.com.

So, I'll show you riddle riddle by joining the Clube crew for $5 a month, or the review crew for $8 a month, and get in free episodes. See you there! $5 a month or the review crew for $8 a month and get it for your episodes. See you there!