Hey Riddle Riddle - #2: My Puzzle Lies Over the Ocean

Episode Date: August 1, 2018

We have another episode for you Kevins and Susies! Riddles include a drunken man from the bad part of town, unlocking the mysteries of salt, a little boy and his wanted toy, and a trip around the globe to check in on the Italian judicial system. All that and a captain lost at sea! Arrrrrrgh yee ready for some riddles?Starring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifEditing by: KJ SnyderTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a Riddle Riddle, I'm Adder O'Reilly. I'm JPC. And I'm Aaron. And we're here to answer your riddies and puzzies that you might submit. Oh, we didn't agree to that. We all agreed right before the show. I said, should we call them riddles and puzzles? And we all agreed riddies and puzzies is the new way to say riddles.

I said riddies and puddles. This scenario, you pitched riddles and puzzles and that we all agreed to riddies and puzzies. I like riddles. It's your idea. You're putting that idea on it. I like riddies and puddles. Rizzizzies the main antagonist from Greece and puddles And I said ripples and puppies

We're here Joining us this week is Raffi Raffi's rivies and bubbles is Ravie. Ravie's Rive's in Probbles. So we're going to do, we're going to list off some riddles, some puzzles, some lateral thinking questions, and we're going to try and solve them. We ask you at home or on the train or wherever you are listening to this, we ask you to try and play along at home and solve these.

We're not going to give the answer immediately. We're going to try and figure them out, try and talk through them. So you can play along as well at home. And by play along we do mean play along out loud while you're listening to the podcast. Yeah. All of us try to interact with us. Please start. Please start talking to someone on the train and apropos of nothing just start to talk with them about dancing. I better remember a little puzzly for you. I've had Iples in bananas coming your way. If I have 10 app, please. Let's do our warm up lightning round.

OK. So these are going to be shorter riddies and puzzies. Maybe a little bit easier or a little bit more on the nose versus needing to kind of sus out what's missing or thinking outside the box. We read it every time you tell us that they're going to be easy ones. It just puts like a lot of pressure.

Gotcha. Well, all I know is that I gave these to some three-year-olds and they got them within a few seconds and then they ate them. I'm trying to work on my confidence. So if you can set the expectations low, so I can play on the audience. We're all trying to work on your confidence, sir. Thank you.

I'm trying to get my confidence weighed down. So what you're doing is great. Here we go. We'll just do a couple of these I know the answer to these you do not here we go first one before Mount Everest was discovered. What was the highest mountain on earth? Still Mount Everest because it doesn't matter Nothing matters the answer is Mount Everest dot nothing matters. Yeah, because that's it God The answer is Mount Everest. Nothing matters. Yeah, because that's it God Question number two these are warm-ups remember the stakes are low and what year did Christmas and New Year's fall in the same year? And what year did Christmas and New Year's fall in the same year every year? Am I not supposed to answer these quickly? No, yeah, that's fine to answer that quickly, right? It is every year Christmas and New Year's They fall in the same year every year. Yeah, yeah, it is it's not you need to receive which is what new years it's the years

Yeah, I felt like those were because Christmas and New Year's Eve never fall in the same year or the same day Oh, I felt like we're doing better at the warm-up riddles than what we did last time last time. Well hold your tongue because here comes number three. If you are running in a race and pass the second-place person, what place are you in? You second. Yeah. He's in third place. Yeah.

Wow, it must be really good. Wow, I said if you are running an erase and pass the second place person and JPC said he was in third That's a real the doctor was a mom Yeah, here's the reason I love I don't run co-ed Here's the reason I love Tall women are all men. Puzzies.

If you're having a barbecue, if you're having a gathering, if you're at a high school reunion, I feel like Puzzies and Ridies are such a great way to suss out who's racist, who's sexist, who's a nerd, who's a joy in these and isn't there. Who likes a putty of the riddy. Yeah, these are really great traps. It's a spring on people.

Because if you pose a pose already and someone says, oh, that was definitely a man, then that person obviously thinks all people are men. Yeah, if you just, if you want to catch people and pronoun buzzes, definitely the way to do it. Let's do one more of these. One more, one more. Cool. A man is able to contact his long lost brother this worked out for you JPC a man is able to contact his brother got lost and see oh I guess I guess we're just talking about that in the open now it was lost to see for a year that was on his no no list of things we shouldn't bring up I told you one thing I don't want to mention is my brother lost to see do you think you should be

saying we're talking about that out in the open when you lost your brother at sea? Oh, he's back now. He's home. He's big shark. I thought you're going to say he's back now. He's home. He's dead. But we found the body. But he's home. And man is able to contact his long lost brother who he has never met. They agreed to meet. When the brother arrives, he is able to instantly pick him out from the crowd.

How is that possible? They're twins. Twins, twin brothers. That's the correct answer. Twins. And twins. Which we should have answered that way. Yeah.

Here's one more. I think we'll all like this one. A man was stabbed in the heart. No one tried to save him, but he didn't die. How that possible? Do they say how that possible? No, I took my own spin on it. A man was stabbed in the heart.

No one tried to save him, but he didn't die. Did he get one of those pulp fiction adrenaline shots straight to the heart? No. Well, it was a shot to the heart. And you're onto blame. A man had one rule, no Bon Jovi. A man was stabbed in the heart. Well, you brought up my A man I had one rule, no bonjewi. A man was stabbed in the heart.

Well, you brought up my brother. And no one tried to save him, but he didn't die. How is that possible? We're not moving on until you two. A man was stabbed in the heart. No one tried to save him, but he didn't die. Talk yourself through it. What do we know?

You didn't die. A man was stabbed in the heart. We have for stabbing someone in the heart. They insult you. God's voice tells you to. Oh, he has a heart-shaped tattoo. Someone stabs him in the tattoo. It's like in his arm or whatever.

No, I'm trying to say him because it's a bar fight. Because that's what someone would say. It's not like I stabbed in the arm. No, like, oh, someone stabbed me if I tattoo. Doctor, I'm stabbed in the heart. That, like, um, someone stabbed me if I tattoo. Doctor, I'm stabbed in the heart. That's your arm, but it's not a heart. But I take clever, doctor. Celebrate me.

A man is, wait, what is it? A man is stabbed in the heart. No one tries to save him, but wait, hold on. But he doesn't die. Is it like a romantically, like he's emotionally stabbed in the heart? Like, how would that work? Yeah

You know he just like suffers a heartbreak people like oh you stab me in the heart I think that requires a little bit of role-playing JPC want you play Kevin that'll be the person getting stabbed Aaron want you play Susie she'll be the person stabbing Kevin. Emotionally, and want you to play someone from Boston. Okay. But I'm not from Boston. I'm just visiting. Okay. God, thank you so much for coming to meet me. Yeah, you sounded so upset. This is the part where Susie says what kind of make the model of car she has. I just think for coming into my Honda Accord.

And, uh, well, you mentioned to meet you in your car and your email. Well, Kevin, I hate to be this guy, but I'm. What guy? I hate to be this person, but I don't love you anymore. I'm leaving you for another year. What? And I just want, you know, this personal, this is about you.

You are a lovable. Someone try to save. And I've been smoking your pot. What? I've been smoking your pot. And I've been sleeping around. And I found another man. Like I knew his, his, his, that wasn't pot.

That was a rake in hell. I've been selling that. Did you dumb-busted? Step, step, step. Oh, she's stabbing at my tattoo. No one tries to save this man because he's an asshole. Reagan, no. But he's a coward, so he doesn't die.

He dies a thousand deaths. Uh, yes. What's the answer to this stupid pussy? The answer is he's already dead. I was just about to say that, but I was thinking, is it my water? Aaron, last episode and this episode, two for two, you've exclaimed, I was about to say that, but I didn't. We got to open up those gates.

I, you know what? I was about, I felt that Aaron was about to say that. Thank you. I was nowhere close to that. Well, I didn't, as, right before you were about to answer, I went, oh, okay. He did. He's dead. Remember, this is all based on the honor system.

So if I say an answer and you go, mm, I was gonna say that, I'll give it to you. Okay. I was like, I'm not gonna say that. This is one for me. And again, Aaron, I just need to point out, like we pointed out the first episode. These are warbups and warbups,

historically, for no sport, and count towards a point total. All right, we have finished the lightning round. We've warmed up our brains. Let's get into the meat and potatoes of this podcast. Here we go. This is our first one. And this one is going to be a little bit of a court case.

So I'm going to read the case. I'm going to let you know what the mystery is or what we need to solve is. And I'm going to give you a few clues that we have. As you get into this portion of the show, these are ones that I do not have the answers to. So I will be trying to figure this out as well. I love how Aaron closes her eyes. Even before, you start reading the prop.

She's got her eyes closed while you're talking about the rules of the prop. I feel like every time I watch Aaron for more than like 30 seconds It looks like she's in like an annual video Like she's blissing out so like she can hear music that nobody else can hear she got the she got the word of so well But the deep level of concentration that she's living in She's also since since five minutes ago. She's aged 20 years I often forget that people can see me. And when I was a kid, I thought that if I closed my eyes, other people couldn't see me. And so there's lots of photographs of me with my eyes shut up.

Up until what age did you believe that? 24. This is so mentally taxing you have to close your eyes and age yourself. Here we go. Here's the case. I love this is so mentally taxing you have to close your eyes and age yourself. Here we go. Here's the case. Steve hangs out in the bad part of town and he loves to drink beer. He is often seen gesturing violently with both hands as he talks in a loud voice even though

no one else is nearby. Sometimes he repeats himself three or four times. Although police officers routinely lock up people who drink as much as Steve does, and walk around talking to no one, they always leave Steve alone. This is a lot to impact. The mystery. What is Steve doing while he gestures with his hands? The clues. Before we get into clues, what do we think so far? He crazy. Well, you know, no. And and the police are like we don't want to deal with this So he's an ex-cop they feel bad for him. He was he has like Maybe he's a master max dress. Yeah, he's maybe he's a rehearsing man a performer performer, yeah, like he's doing stand-up and he's

But what is that explain why he loves to drink beer? So he loves to drink beer I So he loves to drink beer. He's sad. I mean, yes, it's depressing. Well, that's when you say performer, we assume we can extrapolate sad. Those are synonymous. I mean, that doesn't love to drink beer. Those are sentiments.

Who doesn't love to drink beer? Yeah, exactly. Like everyone loves to drink beer. I mean, I've been sober for five years. Okay, so what's the love to drink beer? What's the question? Like, what's the question? Like, what's the mystery? What is Steve doing while he gestures with his hands?

So we know he drunk. We know he's gesturing violently with both hands. So he's, he's like Italian. He's using both hands. Yeah, he's just, he's just, he's just, he's just, he's just, he's just, he's just accumulated violently with both hands as he talks in a loud voice, even though no one else is nearby. Sometimes he repeats himself three or four times although police officers routinely lock up people who drink as much as Steve does and walk around talking to no one

They always leave Steve alone So what kind of profession would you have that would allow you to be drunk bartender? Okay, yeah bartenders are allowed to drink but he walks around and he talks to no one. Maybe no one is the name of this horse. So the answer to most riddles is that one of the key words in the riddle is the name of a horse. That's for sure true. Every riddle we've done so far. Kevin has five apples. I take away one apple. How many apples does Kevin have?

He is the horse. Because all riddles take place in the late 1970s. Because my other guess was that like, you know, like this guy who they call Steve in the book, but I think that that's Kevin, probably pronounced Kevin, is a cop himself, which is why cops don't bother him. And he's undercover? Yeah. Here's some of the clues.

Police officers don't give Steve a second glance. They think he's perfectly normal. Well, we can assume that from what we heard earlier. Another clue. Steve is usually well dressed. Aren't we all usually well dressed? Usually. Steve is not homeless. That's the best clue. I feel like from here on out, every clue should be whether or not they're homeless. Steve likes to use modern technology, headset. He's wearing one of those black Bluetooth, right? He's wearing a headset. Maybe he's talking on the phone.

Or like a Bluetooth, like one of those earpieces. Steve is having a conversation with someone, even though it looks like he's alone. So he's on Bluetooth. Well, he's on stage. Yeah, that's what I thought. But why is he drunk? He loves to drink beer. The other thing

I thought was he was like some sort of like Alex Jones radio personality, you know, who's just like getting drunk and Ranting into a microphone, but doesn't the thing also say that he's on the street when he does this? Yeah, they said or they say that they lock up people on the street who do this. I guess it doesn't say he's on the street, but it says police officers pass him, right? Yeah, I thought like what why also the police officer be walking past him? It's got to be a Bluetooth headset. Yeah, but didn't they just say that in the clues? Like they're like, is I head set? Here's what these aren't clues, but here's what we can assume.

Everyone's scared of Steve. He's drunk. We can assume this? He's slurring his speech so he keeps repeating himself. These are just sure he's drunk. He loves to drink. We know that. He loves to drink beer. Well, that's true. We might not you know I might have to drunk it all. Oh, he knows. Steve is on the bad part of town. He loves to eat steak. What if he's one of the airport things

where you get people to land planes? He's talking to a headset for that. So he's a drunk airtruck controller. I mean, that makes as much sense as any. But they say that he walks around. Like they say that in there as well. So that's true. Like airtruck controller people like walk around.

Yeah, it says he walks around talking to no one. Like radio hosts don't walk around. So, I think we go to the answer. We gotta go to the answer. We gotta go to this answer. Here's the, here's the, it's stumped up. Here's the A. Steve is wearing a wireless headset. He's talking on his mobile phone.

That is the full fucking answer. I'm so disappointed. The full fucking answer is Steve is wearing a wireless headset. He's talking on his mobile phone. What? All of that, all of that superfluous information. But what is he yelling? They has to repeat himself three or four times.

Okay. Here's, okay, here's my new theory. Episode one. Remember that guy who would call, C.C. and she would act angry like it was a solicitor. This is the same situation. This is hardly a riddle. Does this count as a riddle? That made me sad. That answer surprised me and what's the what's a bad surprise? What's the word? It's like a I mean my heart hurt. I feel like I've been that guy who got stabbed. Night terror.

That's what you're thinking of the word night terror. So here's everything left on the table. After we got the answer, here's what's still left to be used in this contraption. He loves to drink beer. He gestures violently with both hands. He talks on a loud voice. He repeats things three or four times. The police leave him alone. All of that, Steve, is not homeless. All of that was left on the table with this answer. Yeah. I mean, I guess it was the whole thing was that this information is just a misdirect. That's like buying a table at IKEA and you put everything together and you realize it's just a tabletop and the legs and screws are laying on the side and you're like, that's like buying a table at IKEA and you put everything together and you realize it's just a tabletop and legs and screws are laying on the side and you're like

that's my table you have an example for someone who's not a millionaire who might first guess you buy a table from JC Petty thank you JC Petty a store for the people I feel like that question was entirely misdirects with no information and the clue about the technology thing was just basically the answer. Here's what I'm going to say about Reddles in general. I'm not a big fan of the misdirect, a school of riddle. I like the, you know, use the whole buffalo type of riddle. I want to get into a riddle where everything has some sort of importance. Because I'm like, I'm getting, you know, he loves to drink beer. It's like, what what kind of I'm trying to think of like what his job is but it's just a dickhead on a phone hey JP I think that's how you view the world talk you

want everything to have meaning that's true I'm learning a lot about you learning a lot about you wish there's a song like getting to know you to know you this real song that we can say. Now we apparently both know. Uh. There's learning a lot of that. You can learn all sorts of things about you. But like every podcast does, we have to be like, don't use more than 10 seconds.

Oh yeah, that's true. That's by law if you're doing a podcast, you have to make that joke. Yeah, because getting to know you, that song is certainly not the public domain, but we can sing happy birthday And to our hearts content here's Puzzie number T Do you want to take that again for people who don't speak idiot? Is his really number doe

It's a short one just because I mad at that last one. We're gonna do a short one. Can salt be recycled? How? I'm sorry. I hate it. Can salt be recycled? You're saying salt? Can salt be recycled? How?

I feel like this is someone posing a question being like, I'm a scientist, this is in a riddle. Is this a Yahoo answer? Like, what is this? Can salt be recycled? Be recycled. How? How? So we just have to know? Can salt be recycled? How? How?

So we just have to know how salt can be recycled. So if you don't, the answer's obviously yes, because how would be part of it if it was no? Can salt be recycled? No. You played yourself, Riddle. You gave us everything by saying how.

You gave us the full answer. You fool. So salt can be in it. You fucked up, Riddle. That riddle should say, salts can be recycled. How? A man was stabbed in a heart. No one tried to save him, but he didn't die.

He was already dead. How? You played yourself, Riddle. I feel like how is a question you never have to ask at a riddle because that's inherent to the riddle. OK. So I don't know how salt can be recycled. Did you just started this like, we can guess we have to ask at a riddle because like that's inherent to the riddle. Okay. So I don't know how salt can be recycled.

Did you just started this like we can guess we have to solve this? I said that wasn't the whole concept for the show. But what's sure this is? This again. I feel like every time I come on this fight, I guess I have to solve something. Okay. This is hate riddle, not what information do you have about salt? This is trivia at this point.

Here's something I know about salt. It's in a lot of water. It's an angelic jolly movie. All of our, yes, all of everything goes back to nature. Everything is recycled. Everything in the world is recycled. She's one third of salt and pepper. Yep.

My answer for this I'm locked in and I think it's drink your own piss. And I think that that's right. And not just in the context of this riddle, I think that that's the correct thing to do with life. What's funny is what's funny is people have this taboo you would never drink someone else's piss but you would drink your own piss all day. Don't you die if you drink your piss too much but you drink something else's it's something like that. I'm I'm sorry. Don't you die? I'm drink your own piss. How?

I'm I someone out there knows what I love that mother nature was just like oh we'll let humans drink piss if you drink your own So they get to know each other. It's like a mom who's like who are your friends? Sweetie wear a jacket don't drink your own piss. Mom, I'm just gonna be out for the night. I'm just saying, don't, if it comes to it, don't drink your own piss. You know, that's how your grandpa died. How do you recycle salt? Well, here's what I think. I think you can't consume it. I think the thought is, oh, once you eat salt, you gotta shit it out. But I think this, in this context, we're not eating salt.

So you can like age, steak, in a salt cave, right? You can use salt as a presentation. I'm listening to the whole thing. Great first thing to have hope. You know what I don't know how they answer this riddle. You know when you get married and you take your brighter groom across the threshold and you sprinkle salt on the bed. Maybe you just reuse that later. I think you can roast peps.

Wait, what did I say? You know when you get banned. You throw salt at vampires. Put your brighter, you groom in a big pot, you're as bright as the salt. What's the answer? You can hear them screaming. Okay, let's get some clues here. Oh good clue.

Are we talking about ordinary table salts, sodium chloride? Yes. Okay, let's get some clues here. Oh good clue. Are we talking about ordinary table salts, sodium chloride? Yes. Is the salt eaten? Yes. So there goes my bed theory. Is the same salt eaten twice? Yes. So my piss drinking theory is looking pretty good.

How we feel that? Were we? I still, yeah. If you eat the salt, you can sweat it out. Yeah. How we feel that? Were we... I still, yeah. If you eat the salt, you can sweat it out. Yeah. And then eat it off the back of your lover. No, like if you...

You know that Paul Simon's song? 50 ways to eat salt off the back of your lover? Just eat it off the back, Jack. You can get a new bag. But yeah, right? That's when you sweat, that's your sweating salts. Exactly. And then you lick.

And then you lick your salts? Yeah. So that's my answer. Sweated out lick your salt. Aaron? I'm with him. That's what your t-shirt says. I'm with him.

We get it. You support Bernie Sanders. It is cheerful, but also it's like a little manic. I'm with him. I'm with him. I'm with him. I think it is, oh boy, I think it's going to be something with tears. Maybe. You say sweat, sweat, tears.

Here we go. Bread recipes customarily call for small amounts of salt. Vivigurously needing bread dough and working up a sweat. One can add previously eaten salt to the dough, so it will be eaten again. That's assuming a lot. So, so sweating was the right answer. Yeah. Okay. But it's assuming that while someone is kneading dough, say someone at your local little seasors is making a pizza dough in house. As they sweat, their sweat seeps into the dough. It's an old Italian man. And you're eating too much. He's gesturing, he's gesticulating wildly,

saying the same thing three or four times. You know, there is a thing with like making bread where it's like the, whatever the bacteria, the cultures that you have on your hands, like when you make bread, affects the way the bread tastes. Like when you make like the bread yeast or whatever, I don't know why I said that or know that. No, that's true.

It's true. You see, I never wash my hands and that's why my bread is so specific. No, there are people that collect like specific bread strains of like people's hands bread, because they all like all those sourdoughs like taste different or whatever. I know what you mean, I've heard that. Yeah.

We were right about it being sweat. I'm proud of that. Let's do a little role-playing. OK. You two are working in a bakery. OK. And you're making bread, but in a circumstance that requires a lot of sweat.

Come on. Look. So we're listening to that. Oh, god. What's that? Girl, I might make you a sweat Does anyone know that's how I don't don't worry about it learning about No more than 10 seconds guys okay okay

Wow Susie uh we turned out the fucking radiated up burn alive in here. Oh it's so hot in here wait a two Jesus Christ. I see he's on the bread over that bread. We see blood splatter Oh my god, Susie. That's blood. I'm okay. I'm just sick all the time No, Susie that's bad. I I think you might be really sick cut to the hospital Excuse me. Is something is something Kevin says? I do the stage show. We cut to the hospital. Excuse me, Dr. Kevin.

Why would you sue my name is Kevin? Because I'm a doctor. I'm a mom. Oh, I'm sorry, Susie. Oh boy. Why are you Susie? I think she's really sick. I'm not your wife.

I'm a mom. But I'm already dead. We see a bag of Coke fall out of Susie's pocket. Oh. I... Doctor, you dropped your coke. I was trying to see if you wanted to buy. Well, my wife is dead, so I guess I could use a little upper.

If she's already dead, do you mind if I stab her in the heart? Not at all. I'm a weirdo. Would you like some bread? Say it again, I'm gonna make you sweat. Okay, so that red will give a D. My highest rating of the day is- I again still don't like riddles. One day I may change my mind today is not that day. I would have given that enough, but after the headset one, I feel like that's our, that's

set the bar in terms of like that's our base. That was better than the headset one and I did solve that one. So, I feel good. So, that was number two. Let's move on to number three. We feeling good? Yeah. Here we go number two. Let's move on to number three. We feel good. Yeah. Here we go number three. One day earlier little Oscar had mailed in order form for a wanted toy.

Now he was constantly pestering his mother to let him check the mail. Suddenly looking out the window at the apartment complex mailboxes, he shouted, the mail is in. The mail is in. Neither he nor his mother had seen a mail carrier, mail truck, or any activity near the mailboxes. But Oscar was right. It was in. How had he known? nor his mother had seen a male carrier, male truck, or any activity near the mailboxes. But Oscar was right. It was in. How had he known? Oscar's psychic.

Yeah, he's psychic. He moved stuff with his mind. Oscar's a horse's name. He's a horse, and horses are smart. This is the 1940s for sure, everything about this. I got, my name's a lost girl and I'm going to order a toy. I'm going to die it, we are numb. What did it say about the noise at the end of the,

they had neither heard or seen what it was. Neither he nor his mother had seen a male carrier, male truck, or any activity near the male boxes. Here's my fair part of this. Oscar had mailed an order form for a wanted toy. Wanted. This toy is so bad that you are lemon. Have you seen this toy?

Did you say boy? No, toy. This toy killed my father. This is a one. In Vietnam. This is a murder and toy. Okay, so. It's a scene.

He hasn't seen the truck. So it's a hard. No, it didn't say hard. I think I know the answer so it's a scene. He hasn't seen the truck. So it's a little hurt. No, it didn't say hurt. I think I know the answer and it's not fun. Is it that he felt the vibration of it? Because he definitely. Oh man. So wait, I think that also the male comes at the same time

every day, so he could have just been like, oh, it's four, the male's here and then it was. That's better than the answer I had. Oh, really? My answer, my thought is that he sees the flag up. Like, you know, mailboxes have the little, right? Yeah, but there are an apartment complex. Didn't it say that?

No, that's your assumption. You assume somebody named Oscar lives in an apartment complex? If a person named Oscar has a house and I'm living in an apartment in real life, I'm going to be pissed. They shop at JC pinning for sure. If a person named Oscar has it better than me, I'm losing my shit. Yeah, I think it's like the flag on the mailbox.

I think also the fact that mail comes at the same time almost every day is a good one Maybe the dogs in the neighborhood park It could be dog related Horse related. Yeah, maybe the dogs in the neighborhood are horses in the park You know dogs and horses maybe a town cryers ringing a big bell in the middle of town and saying, males here, males here, death count and vietdop. Now, how would that sound if the town-crier was John Cryer? Males here, ma'am. Do we want some sweet, sweet clues? Yeah, give us the clues, this riddle.

Okay. Had Oscar put the order form in the outgoing mail slot next to the mailboxes the previous day after that day of mail had been delivered? Yes. Did the mailboxes have big pods nearby so that a mail carrier could put a parcel in one of them and the key to that pod is the resident's mailbox? Yes.

What? You got it. You solved it. Let me read that again. POD question. Oh my God. Let me read that again. Pod question. Oh my god. Did the mailboxes have big pods nearby so that a mail carrier could put a parcel in one of them

and the key to that pod in that residence mailbox? Yes. Oh. I still don't know what's being said here. So some of you are like apartment complexes, like the mail delivery system is, if the thing is too large to fit in the box, they'll put it in the big receptacle thing and put the key to the receptacle in the mailbox.

But pods is what I call podcasts, because I'm in the biz. Oh, for sure. Yeah, and that's where I'm wearing these cans, speaking into this Mikey. And since I'm a youth, pods, to me, means tide pods. What we eat for fun and sex. And I'm a little baby, So young I've never even heard the words. We also are also those portable storage units that you can buy and live in. We know JPC is a youth because he's wearing an overwatch hat. Yes. I'm like a teen. I'm

cool like a teen. I do a smoking. Last question. Clue here. Did Oscar pay particular attention to the pods? Yes. Okay, so the toy was too big to fit in the mailbox. Yeah, I feel like he's gonna see a cute toy. It was a big old toy. He's right through the pods. Oh boy.

I feel like these riddles today are... I mean, this is just proof that we don't know the answers to these riddles at the end. And that riddles are bad. If I had known these answers, I would not have put these in the show. Here's the answer. Oscar knew the procedure for receiving a package by mail. You take the key from your mailbox, unlock the pod, and take the package from the pod. The key stays in the pod door.

Only a mail carrier can remove a key from a pod door. When Oscar saw a pod without a key, and remembered that the pod had a key on the previous day, he knew that the mail carrier was going to be in the pod door. Only a male carrier can remove a key from a pod door. When Oscar saw a pod without a key, and remembered that the pod had a key on the previous day, he knew that the male carrier had delivered the day's mail. I'd like to introduce a new segment. God is dead. This is better answer, where we pretend that we are a co-writer, and thus

and we create a better answer. Okay, great. So Adel, can you read the riddle from the beginning one more time? Hey guys, you know I was writing that puzzle? It's one day earlier, a little Oscar had mailed an order form for a wanted toy. Is that, is wanted toys, that what people say?

Oh yeah. No normal human being say wanted toys. You guys are the best roommates. You need to get into any no pods. That's the easiest way to get across is to this toy that needs to be desired. Did you say that gave you no pods? Yeah, gave me no pods.

Or did you say pods? I meant to say pods, but I guess I said pods. I think I know where to go with this riddle. But let me keep reading. Now he was constantly pestering his mother to let him check the mail. Suddenly looking out the window at the apartment complex, oh, apartment complex.

Yeah. Someone later on when listening to this is gonna be right when they suggest. Oh, someone. So someone listened. Okay. That's vehicle. He shouted the mail is in, the mail is in.

Neither he nor his mother had seen a mail carrier, mail truck or an activity near the mailboxes. But do I say mail wrong? Weird. No, you can say it in a little. And the mail pods. I eat my mails and deliver mail. Yeah, yeah.

Wanted toy. Or an activity near the mailboxes. I eat my males and deliver meal. Yeah, yeah, one to toy We're in activity near the mailboxes, but Oscar was right. It was in how had he known? So this isn't my puzzle at all. You're you're writing it obviously, and it's very good But the direction that I would go with this is the Male male hominem so he says the male is in the male is in meaning a penis is introduced. Well, yeah. Yes, and can I tell you this riddle is for it was commissioned by better homes in garden, but I think they'll let some. They'll let some of that slip in. Yeah, I mean, do it the rental what you want,

but that is my recommendation. And this isn't my puzzle, but I would have it be something fun like you heard dogs barking. That'll be a more satisfying answer and will inspire less rage when someone finds out what it is. If you said horses, I would have been on board. Bummer. The one thing you don't want to do with this puzzle when someone finds out what it is. If you said horses, I would have been on board. Bummer.

The one thing you don't want to do with this puzzle is assume that people have an intricate understanding of the way mail is delivered in a partner complex. Because that would be fucking insane. Some people have never lived in an apartment complex where an archaic rule for mail delivery is still in place. And others, even if they have lifted some apartment complex like that, would not assume that that's the answer to a puzzle.

Puzzle number four. Great. I'm ready. An Italian judge. Oh no. Why are they specific about ethnicity? Ah. Wait, is he a judge in Italy?

I don't know. OK, we got it. They really took me off guard here. An, is he a judge in Italy? I don't know. Okay, we got it. They really took me off guard here. An Italian judge released a guilty man and convicted an innocent man. And as a result, the confectionery industry has greatly benefited. Why?

Okay. Okay, so he's an Italian judge. Why, they wouldn't say that. They wouldn't say Italian judge if that wasn't important. And this is honest to God in the phrasing. This is not something I added for SS and Gs. This is an actual, an Italian judge released a guilty man and convicted an innocent man. And as a result, the confectionery industry has greatly benefited.

Why? So you didn't just slip in it. I didn't just slip. That's because, before we started recording this this podcast you did tell me that you were going to be slipping out a lot of. Well to be honest the first puzzle the guy was not gesticulating wildly and violent. I just let that something in a time would do. Okay so this is an Italian judge and the confectionery industry? So confectionery is gonna be like cookies, candies, yeah. Or candies, confection?

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So maybe this, what's the most famous Italian confection? Canoli. Canoli. So, one of the guys took the gun, one of the guys took the canoli. The guy took the gun, goes to one of the guys took the canola the guy took the gun goes the jail the guy took the canola

gelato Bobby kind of Okay, so a guilty man Get goes free and an innocent man goes to prison correct and as a result the confectionary industry has greatly benefited Why gelato gelato? was to present. Correct. And as a result, the confectionery industry has greatly benefited. Why? Jalata. Jalata.

So this is all about that movie double jeopardy. So you can't go to jail twice for committing the same crime. So if you murder your wife and you go to jail for it, if you murder your wife again, you can't go back to jail. I just saw the movie double jeopardy. And I was in and out of sleep. Ah boy. So I think this has something to do. Well this one takes the cake. Now that's a joke. But is it maybe also the answer? My favorite thing about when someone tells a joke is that when they say the joke in the same breath without any pause, they say, no, that's a joke.

So guilty man was released. So somebody maybe robbed a bakery, but he was let go. Because he was let go and because the case was reported about the local Italian newspapers, everyone's like, yeah, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, I'm hungry for canole. I was reading about this robber stealing canole, now I'm hungry for canole. Oh, so about this robber stealing canole, now I'm hungry for canole.

Oh, so yeah, it's news and people are like, you know what I haven't had in a while, is that canole shop? Yeah, that makes sense. That's not the answer and if it is, well hang myself. Well, the stakes are pretty high. Let's get some clues here.

Yeah, please, clues. The Italian judge tried a rebel, but released a robber. The Italian, what does that mean? The Italian was not in Italy when he made the judgment. The judge, the rebel, and the robber never ate any chocolate. What the hell? It's a rebel and a robber. A great TV show.

A judge James Dean and the hamburger go, they're walking to a court. Oh my God. This riddle is awful. And then I don't go. Do we make a big call, Rebel and Robber? Everybody shut up. This is not important.

Rebel, Robber, you in. I know, I'm in. What do you play? This whole podcast is just about generating IP for other things. We're all just trying to do more shows. I don. What do you play? This whole podcast is just about generating IP for other things. We're all just trying to do more shows. I don't like the idea, but I'd sell it to Netflix. Well, so the other thing that I brought this up earlier,

this Italian judge is not in Italy. So it's like, I feel like we need to know like a famous Italian judge to be able to do. Like is it talking about a specific person? Who are the judges? We know. Judge Edo, Judge Dread, Mike Judge. So, Judge Judy, my uncle was a judge.

Famous. Famous. Famous. Famous. Famous. Smooth. I could be Italian. Aaron, don't make up names.

I wish. Famous Italian judge, not in Italy. Mario Battelli was a judge on iron chef. So, well, maybe it's not a, it's not a courtroom. It's on a courtroom. It's a judge of a cooking show. Ooh! And a man was guilty of making delicious food. Mm-hmm. And a time, a burger though. And a time judge released a guilty man and convicted an innocent man. and as a result the confectionery industry has greatly benefited kick-boss it's kick-boss I think it's what I said

earlier which is that it's kick-boss kick-boss yeah it's here's here's a clues again the Italian judge tried a rebel but released a robber the Italian was not in Italy when he made the judgment, the judge, the rebel, and the robber never ate any chocolate. It's a vanilla based challenge. I honestly, I think I have the answer. What is it? It's like a... Nope, I don't have the answer. This is stupid. I thought was that it was a Jesus of Nazareth thing where they released the... Here we go.

I just saw the answer and I think you're right from the one where I saw which is Pontius. The Italian with Pontius Pilate, who released Barabas and condemned Jesus Christ to die by crucifixion at Easter time. Every year Easter is marked by the sale of millions of chocolate Easter eggs worldwide. Yep, I got that one. I don't know, but I just watched the live Jesus Christ superstar. So this one's on me. Yeah, and the crowd was chanting, give us Barabbas.

Give us Barabbas. And he was like, really Barabbas? He's a bad guy. Now again, I'm reading from the Bible. So that makes sense. I should have picked up on that. Dude, I nailed that one if you... Wow. Who is reading from the Bible. Yeah, so that makes sense. I should have picked up on that dude I nailed that one if you are I was raised Muslim Bragg

I would have loved to be raised Muslim I was raised Catholic and should have gotten this by uncle's great uncle smute. Yep, who is who is so what I mean to say is I'm ignorant to who Barabas is is Barabas the character from Mortal Kombat with the long metal spikes? Long metal spikes. Yes. So there's a Jesus versus Barabas. Oh, the Mortal Kombat. No, the, the,

I don't want to see that finish him because that's going to be tasteless. So who is Barabas? It's less cool than you think. So the story is Pontius Pilate went to Luke Cage. Uh, no, no, no, no. Not Luke Cage. Who's Pilate went to Luke Cage. No. No, not Luke Cage. Who's that Johnny Cage? Johnny Cage. Luke Cage is from Marvel's The Defenders.

Yeah, I've messed this up. No, Pontius Pilate said that he would free one person. He would pardon one person when Jesus was going up for trial. And the crowd, I can't remember why the crowd wanted to free Barabbas is because the Pharisees had turned everyone against Jesus or something like that. And then he freed Barabbas instead, who was a robber. Yeah.

So Barabbas spelled B-A-R-A-B-B-A-S was a robber. So Robbis, is that like a plan words? Is the Bible full of wordplay like that? Oh yeah. The Bible's fun. The Bible is actually Funny enough full of Easter eggs. That's why we call those Easter eggs is because it started in the Bible. Yeah What are some other puns in the Bible? So Easter eggs God Isn't there a part where it says Jesus walked on water but walked is W.O.K.

Yeah, he heated up a walk. Yeah, he was making some vegetables. He steamed them in a walk. Water into wine, where you get water and then he just went about it. Yeah, it was water into wine. And this one is so dry. Yeah, that's all the Bible. They put Jesus on the cross and said, Nailed it.

No! Was that one? I just felt my mother wake up suddenly right now. She's like, I'm sad. She's been in the colvo for 10 years. She's like, why am I sad? I'm sad because my maiden name is smooth. It is!

That is her maiden name. Wow, Aaron, you should go by smooth. I'm so jealous. Well, my cousins who were my age their last name was smooth And I had to have the last name Keith and I was so jealous of them. How many times per year would your uncle put on a suit and start a riot? Say it. Yeah, you start this is you say it. I want you to say it God I won't I'll say it's Mutsu-Rak. How do we rank that? That puzzle?

Well, it was clever. The confectionary thing is like a big misnomer. Italian judge. You know, it's like there was a lot of misdirects in there that actually did make sense at the end. But again, it kind of requires a specific knowledge of Jesus and Barabbas, which you didn't have at all. And also, I grew up Catholic,

and I still, that didn't come to my brain. So I don't think it's really on the forefront of anybody's. I'm gonna give that one the highest ranking I've ever given up. So I'm gonna give it a D+. Can I ask something that, again, I was raised Muslim? Don't mean to brag. Don't mean to be braggadocious.

Pontius Pilate is Italian. I mean, he's Roman, so. Okay. So where was this trial taking place? Was this in like Jerusalem? No. Yes. Oh God, I don't know anything about the Bible.

Because the Bible, like, I mean, Jesus was King of the Jews. Yes. So Pontius Pilate was a Roman like a consulate or whatever. He was like, he wasn't like a locally elected official. He was appointed from whatever the central Roman power was in sin to be like, I preside over this area. So that's why he was like judging Jesus. Because he was a threat. So they like tried to get him on things that weren't.

Yeah, and in the real, probably just probably didn't even want to do this. He would, he, like, I think he tried to like, send him to King Herod, then Herod gets a song. And that's where we get. Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ. And that's where we get the, because you know Christ. And that's where we get the casinos. And we're learning about you.

It's a problem. To why? In to why? Were you raised Catholic? I went to Catholic school for 12 years, but I was not. I've never had been a Catholic. But we did. My brother senior year, you Jesus Christ superstar.

So that's how you're very familiar with this puzzle. did the kid who played Pontius pilot give give an accent? No, Jesus Christ doesn't have Pontius pilot Oh, it does it does it does because he says walk across my swimming pool. That's King Herod That's King Herod song, but Pontius pilots in there. He's like the does he get a song? Yeah, he said he's a song What is his song? He's the one who's like I this is not He's like the- Does he get a song? Yeah, he's- he's- he's a song. What is his song? He's the one who's like, this is not, he's like screaming all the time, that's a whole show.

He has- he has songs. Simon Zealots? Why would you want to know why you would love with fighting? I just like when Mary Magdalene sleep. There's one- there's- Oh yeah. I just- I just made up a-

What's that happened? I just made up her own. just made up a riddle. Just shut up. You're not doing music calls. You're sleeping on a shelf, you do, you do, you do, you do. I just made up a riddle. Okay, here we go.

There's one Italian man dead in a cabin. Oh my God. He's an Italian pilot. No, doctors, his mother. It's a Pontius pilot. He's an Italian pilot. No, doctors his mother. It's a Pontius pilot. He's a horse. Let's go to our, this is a listener submitted riddle. You can always submit riddles or puzzies to us.

Not always. In puddles. Eventually you'll die. Like we all will. You can send those to hrrpodcast.gmail.com. You can also follow us on Twitter at hayrittlerittle. Spelled like it sounds. And if you have workplace disputes, you can send those to HRpodcast.gmail.com.

I will be answering all of your workplace queries. It's sick. He's dating in the workplace. Now I'm getting all of that. And if you want to text my uncle to make fun of his name, his number is 71. That was his varsity number. And you can piece from this episode, there's enough clues scattered about,

like bread crumbs on the fourth ground. Just a Easter egg. Just Easter egg. He was, he was captain of the Elfopalt team. Of the what-for-balt team? The Yale ever heard of it. You fucking lose that. it, you fucking loser. God, you garbage.

I haven't, because I was raised Muslim. This is from David F. David sent us a riddle that I've never heard before. I know the answer to this one, so it's just for you two. But I've never heard this one before, but it gets pretty dark. Here we go. A captain and three of his crewmates

are the only survivors of a shipwreck. They are adrift on their lifeboat for many days until one of the crew dies of exposure. The other two crew use their cutlaces to poke holes through him so his corpse will sink and not attract sharks. Soon the rest are starving. One morning when the captain wakes up, one more crew member has died and sunk.

The remaining one is cooking over a very small fire. Captain, an albatross landed for long enough to be killed. We have food. The meat, they agree, is the best they have ever tasted, and luckily soon after they are rescued. Many years later, the captain hears of a restaurant serving albatross, that's not a thing that happens. He goes there and orders it. He goes there in orders it. But after taking a one mouthful, he leaves, goes home and kills himself. Why? Because he realizes that he ate a person. The thing is, I've heard this one before. Really? Yeah. This is one that I've heard before. But I don't remember it being so easy

to solve. Who sent this? This is from David F. I feel like there's like maybe like an extra line in there that makes it very obvious that he ate a person. So it says the probably the part where they poked holes in the dead guy and he sunk to the ocean floor? I don't know like just the well the whole like situation where the captain wakes up and he's like Captain bad news somebody died. You'll never find his body because we did the whole thing that we've been doing you know the whole thing also also news stories news story news story do you want a coffee news story

an Albert Ross Lane did killed it plucked all the feathers and I'm cooking it well that's great news but where's Albert Betross? No, no, that was the old story. So anyway, eat this thing. But where's the crew member Albert Betross? But here's my question. If even if like you you had to eat a person like to survive and they're dead Let's say the person dies. You're in a playing crash situation the person dies. Yeah, would you like? Kill yourself later because you're like, you ate, I guess he's killing himself because he had to, he thought he didn't need a person,

he didn't realize that he just did, he did the person. Yeah, so the full answer is the albatross, when he tastes the albatross at the restaurant, the albatross tastes nothing like he remembers, this makes him realize that he ate his friend. But if you ate your friend to survive who was already dead, you wouldn't...

Well, the other guy killed it. But you didn't... Someone who didn't... Who wouldn't recover from that, I get it. That brings us to a little segment called role-playing. Let's have Aaron, you're the captain of a ship. Oh, sorry. And JPC, you're gonna be someone who murdered a crewmate

and is now cooking that crew... Okay. ...cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru-cru- someone who murdered a crewmate and is now cooking that crew crew remember and you're trying to convince the captain that it's something else. Okay gotcha. And Sun up. I'll zoom Sun because this is it see? Yeah. Sun up on this. How are you morning captain? Good morning. How did you sleep? Oh not bad. I miss my best friend no where is he? Where's my best friend? Ooh, story about that. You know how Kevin was always- Thank you. Horny little rascal. Was?

Well, late last night, our shark jumped into the boat, and he was so horny. He thought- How horny was he? Thank you for the setup, Captain. He said, I'll make love to that shark's mouth. Well, that shark tore him, piece for piece. So we did the thing that we do, which is to cut a little hole into pain. Do you like bacon? I do.

Is this related to this door you were just telling just now? Oh, Hush Up Captain, you've drank sea water and you're crazy. We see blood smear across the deck. Ah, that's nasty shark. Anywho! Let me get this drink. Kevin, my best friend got so horny.

He decided to have sex with a shark's mouth. And now there's blood. His blood? Why didn't I just kill you? For sure and now there's blood his blood Why didn't I just kill you Expertly executed Would you guys eat a person? No, okay, you would never eat a person. I'd eat you and I'd feel nothing That's what I wanted is is it that this person is dead or is it like they carve off? You pick this scenario.

Okay, so this person you're on a plane crash, person dies, it's just a dead person now. Do you eat a person to survive? If you have to. No, no, because like most meat, if someone else prepares it for me, maybe, but if I'm doing it, no. I get sick just cutting meat.

Like I just, I think that- I'm a vegetarian and I think I probably would If it came down to survival if it's I feel like everyone would yeah everyone would if it's been like three hours since I haven't had any food Yes, I need a person. I'm confident that any emergency scenario. I would be the first to die So eat me. That's fine. I'm gone first. I slip I fall I make the mistake. I go into the spooky house first. What if we're on a road trip? I order a jack-in-a-box. I take it by not great. I turn and look at you. Well, I have the diet of a sick bird, so I probably won't taste very good. A vulture. Yeah.

I'll never, I'll never forget the first time my dad took me to Jack in the box. Great story. He was like, have you ever been Jack in box? I was like, no, we went to Jack in box. Um, he ordered Jack in the box. He's to have those tacos like two for 99 cent tacos. He ordered the taco. He took one bite. Drove hump killed himself. This has been Hey, Riverville. I'm Adolfi. You can check out. I have other podcasts. Hello from the Magic Tavern, Siblings Peculaire. You can also catch all three of us, myself, JPC, and occasionally, Aaron in the show, World News Tonight at IOTHeter. JPC, anything to plug?

Yeah, if you're in Chicago, you can check out a devil's daughter at the I of the theater at Tuesday nights 1030. You can also follow a one shot RPG on Twitch. I have a show every Thursday at 7. It's a live stream where we play the board game Glutenhaven. And then I also do the campaign podcast on the One Shot Network as well. Check that out if you're a nerd.

I am not a nerd. And so if you're young and cool like me, check out Wet Bus at the IOT or every Friday at 10.30. It's very fun. The show is called Ohelia. Here, and since you're not a nerd, you should also every week tell us what the good party is for this weekend.

Oh, the cool party, and this is what's happening. All right, if you walk around downtown, and you hear some music that's just like and yeah, and then follow the music. It's a very cool party where just me standing with my eyes closed. On the porch. Yeah, with glow sticks. That noon. That's the cool party. I'm young and cool. I'm the youngest person on this podcast. I'm the youngest person. Thanks and cool. I'm the youngest person on this podcast. I'm the youngest person

Thanks for listening. I'm the youngest Created by Adam Sorry John Patrick Is Already That was a hitgun podcast.