Hey Riddle Riddle - #210: Four Year Anniversary!

Episode Date: July 27, 2022

Four whole years of Hey Riddle Riddle? It’s time to graduate! I hope you wrote a speech or you’re at least ready to improvise it! Janet Varney stops by for a few minutes to help us celebrate our anniversary and the second she leaves we do some listener submitted Word Avalanches.  We hope you like dog’s and basketball or you’ll hate this episode. Starring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Special Guest: Janet Varney Editing by:  Casey Toney Theme by:  Arne Parrott Logo by:  Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to mail us something? Hey Riddle Riddle  6351 W Montrose Ave #267 Chicago, IL, 60634 Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531) Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a Headgun Podcast. Students, faculty, parents, listeners, and uninvited perverts. It is my honor today to welcome you to Hay Riddler Riddler High School's graduation. As you know, I am Erin Keefe, the principal here at Hayrittle Rittle High School. Four short years ago in July of 2018, you started this journey to become a better Rittle solver, improviser, and podcast host. We blinked in our hour here, July of 2022. It's time to celebrate all the work you did over the last four years and look forward to the bright future ahead.

In a moment, I will invite our Validictorian, Saluditorian and our class president to make a speech. But for now, I want to talk to you about some of our most treasured memories and the brief history of the class of 2022. We took field trips to Riddital City. We defeated Dr. Chameleon time and time again. We had amazing guests make us laugh. We sang like the Swedish chef, met JP Rittles and begged to smacks the frog to not fuck our moms. Our soccer team won the state tournament. We met our so-mate Janet. These four years were not free from challenges and obstacles, though. For many recordings in 2019, we would keep accidentally locking each other out of the studio when someone went to the bathroom. You'd have to hope you brought

your phone to the bathroom and say something like, hey, I'm locked out by accident. Can you come and get me? Or if you didn't have your phone, you had to bang on the door like a maniac. Aaron never really knew when it was time to record. This was only made worse when recording became remote during the pandemic. Is the recording at 1 p.m. or 3 p.m. Aaron would say, JPC would look at his phone, close his eyes, feel the weight

of the world on his shoulders, and patiently text back the recordings at three. We're doing a main feed and a Patreon. Adel held answers to riddle hostage. JPC gave birth to pretzel Jesus, and Aaron had a weird clicking sound on her audio for over a year that drove Casey insane. These dark moments only made the good times seem even sweeter and adequately prepared every host for the real world. I want to thank the guests of honor today, our listeners.

You found us in unusual ways. Some of you typed in riddles into the podcast app, bright eyed and bushy-tailed, thinking that this would be a real riddle podcast. Some of you got forced to listen to us by your weird brother or significant other, silently resenting them for introducing this poison into your life. Some of you heard us mentioned in passing

by the podcast, my brother, my brother in me, and thought, I guess I'll listen to a riddle podcast, I trust Justin. Maybe you're here from Dungeons and Datties, maybe you're a fan of Cunt the Badger, maybe this downloaded on your phone on its own, like the U2 album. No matter how you got here, you're here now. And the cursed states that you're not allowed to leave us until 2027, when JPC dies, after he gets killed by the followers of his own sex cult. Thank you for listening and let's get started. I'd like to welcome our valedictorian, Alu Wreffi, to the podium first speech.

Thank you Aaron and just to piggyback on what you're saying about the bathrooms in the old studio. I remember a time where mid-scene, mid-sentence, sometimes even mid-airing sentence, Aaron would bolt upright in her chair as if possessed by Vecna and say, I have to go to the bathroom. No warning, no holding her urine, just simply bolting out of her chair and running out of the studio. Hello future lizards, hello all you kevins and suzis, and hello to all you sevens and kuzis. We solved it.

We really solved it all. Who would have thought we'd be here now? All of you are raising your hands, huh? Fuck me, okay. Four years is something special. It's something unforgettable, but then the end seems right. I hope you had the time of your life. And as we go on, we remember all the puzzles we had together.

As our lives change, come whatever we will still be hosts forever. And when you get the chance to sit it out or solve, I hope you solve. I hope you solve. Solve like nobody's watching. And trust me on the sunscreen. And now please welcome to the stage your salute. Thank you. Thank you, Abel.

Most of that was plagiarized. Please find your seat. I don't understand. And please welcome to the stage now your salute Torian Janet Barney. APPLAUSE Hey, thanks everybody. It feels so good to be here. Like most salute Torians, I feel like I don feels so good to be here.

Like most salutatorians, I feel like I don't really deserve to be here. I didn't know I was going to be asked to make a speech. Salutatorian is second, you know, best GPA in the class. I feel like, you know, many would argue that's a weird thing to draw attention to. And it's kind of like drawing attention to the fact that I'm the supposed fourth host of the podcast. Many of you may not want to ever hear me refer to as that again. So from now on, you can think of me as,

hey, Riddle Riddles, class of 22, salutatorian. I've been so happy to show up not just as a guest on this podcast, but as a fan, I cannot believe how prevalent cookie monster still is in each and every one of these guys' lives. He comes up fucking all the time. I get it. Cookie Monster didn't know how to eat cookies, but you can't use that to get out of every scene anyway.

To the uninvited perverts in the audience, I just want to say, I don't think it's cool that you got welcomed, even if principal felt like she wanted to be magnanimous. Please, keep listening to the podcast, but stop being a pervert. Finally, I'd like to dedicate the rest of my speech to three people you may not even have heard of unless you're lucky enough to be a member of the Patreon audience, Flodorias Plomp, Beverly Condolences, and Felix Missingson, for bringing me six hours of uninterrupted joy that I've listened to on a road trip to and from Santa Barbara,

I really feel like I understand relationships now. What I don't fucking understand is word avalanches. I gotta go, peace out. Thank you, Janet. We'll have someone do a mental health check on you later. Definitely don't have a complex. I'm gonna put my skin, I'm gonna put my skin. Is you can probably tell by that speech

she was actually the salutatorian of her graduating class. Now let's welcome to the stage. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I just thought of something. Can thought of something. You thought of another thing for your from your speech. It's just a funny little joke. Oh yeah go ahead. Just when Janet said GPA, I was thinking in my head real fast I did the math and GPA could stand for great penis saddle. Well I'm really happy I'm covering the

microphone with my hand. Can you move your hand? No, I can walk. That's fair. Now let's welcome to the stage Mr. Popular himself, our class president JPC. Waza! From the beer commercials. Look, the administration said I only have three minutes. I'm taking six. No, but seriously, what a fucking year. Oops. Guess I can't curse. I get to, Mr. Majakamo. I get to. Anyway, we've had a lot of fun. Okay, this was a great year, and I would be remiss. If I left this stage without shouting out, my boys, pack here we go do you know what you did the hood where you at Barclay guns oh Bucky Nuckets

sick man yeah sick man we all know why you're called sink man pissing the sink you'd piss in the sink slutty Jeff rib low Picky cricks narco pogo stick pogo stuck Smallow little Nikki and of course, yeah, yeah, you're to me Yeah, he does a great impression and of course my boy RIP handsy Pelosi Handsy Pelosi, I know you're up there in heaven. I know you're up there in heaven because angels Need to fly man, because angels need to fly I said I said I wasn't gonna get emotional. I said I wasn't gonna get an emotional fuck. I get to mr. Madjaka mo I

Can't do I Get to mr. Madjaka. That's my two That's my two and that's my time. Oh wait. No, it's not I also want to shout out some of my favorite teachers. You know you did the work. I'm not easy I'm not easy. I'm a fool JPCs of my class is gonna be a hard year You teachers are the real heroes, okay? You guys do the Lawrence work every day, every day in and out, in and out.

You deserve pay raises. Make it happen, you're super junk-able, you can do it. He drives up Bentley. That's a $250,000 car. What's he doing? Teach us other real heroes. Mrs. Rendles, I never knew how to pronounce your name. Where does D-GO?

Where does the D-GO? Mrs. Rendles, you're the bomb. At the end, and only the end. Huh. You learned something new. Keep teaching me. Dr. Dracula. I know.

I know that you're not a doctor. I know that's not your name. But you had gushers at lunch. My freshman year. Now everybody calls you Dr. Dracula. Keep being you, man. You're great. Please!

I gotta give it up to Professor Salsa. Again, very similar story. Salsa out of shirt. Salsa out of shirt. Day one. Mrs. Muttabello. Mrs. Muttabello. Everybody in school wanted to bang you. And now some of us can. I'm 86 years old and that

means a world to me. It's great. Our Jim coach, Mr. Trempelina. Mr. Trempelina, sorry for jumping on you. The bus driver. The bus driver, Mr. Yuga Poppilus. Mr. Yuga Poppilus, you drive a mean bus. Thank you so much. Thank you. Oh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, executive chef, uh, Chikari Hoif. Chikari. You've gotta tell me what's in those nuggets, man. They the bomb.com never change. Chicken and paprika.

Um, nurses, beer, toa. Uh, thank you so much. I found that your compassion was never ending um, whew, uh, Mr. Panda Panda, Panda Tainamo aka Panda Time. We love having you in class And then I got to give it up to vice principal perfectulo vice principal perfectulo I know I was it easy I know I was it you're up No way with it if it weren't for you meddling kids.

I ripped his mask off so many times and look, all I gotta say is I've had the time of my life here and I can't wait for the after party at my dad's funeral home. He is out of town for the whole weekend. He's got a big funeral home convention. So the party's up. Here we go in the basement. We can go anywhere. We can go anywhere. And you know who can't tell us anything? Mr. Fucking Majakamo. I already used my two. Take me away Majakamo. Take me away.

Thank you, JPC. And again, sorry to Hansi Pelosi's parents. We're so sorry for your loss this year. We do have some bad news. Sorry everyone. During the speeches, it did become clear that no one has become a better riddle solver improviser, podcast host, or person in the four years of this podcast. So legally, we have to start freshman year over again, starting right now.

Don't joke, no, no, do not throw your caps up in the air. Stop it, stop it, no, don't, don't. Everyone walk a single file back into the podcast studio. Let's start the episode. No celebration. She frees those caps in mid-air, that was crazy. I'm real, she's magical. Back to the studio and up it says here,

we don't deserve Janet. We do it? We don't deserve Janet anymore. Maybe in four years we'll earn her as a full time host. I'm beside myself. Full? Addle. Get inside.

I'm so sorry, Janet. One day we'll deserve you. That's what, can I see where it says that? you just said it says here, but I wasn't clear was in the studio Was it on the keyboard? It's on the keyboard? It's on the keyboard? It's always on the keyboard? It's on the inside of it, yeah. Excuse me, local proverb here, I would do anything for that. Get out of here!

Alright. He said on a block of ice! Hey! We both know that we're going to fish! It was the cabin of an airplane! He sat in with an oxygen plate! And the horse came right in! I'm sitting on the boat!

I'm sitting on the boat! I'm sitting on the boat! I'm sitting on the boat! I'm sitting on the boat! Hey Aaron. Yes, saddle. Would you sign my ear book? Um, yeah, sure. So nice meeting you, Todd. Oh, my name is Hattle. Oh, my name is Submer.

Best fish is, Dress Little Fish. Oh Submer. Best fishes, dress a little fish. Oh, I saw you do that on everyone's. So nice meeting you. Hey JPC. Yeah, she taught me too. She taught me hard. I got Todd on mine. You got Todd on yours?

Yeah, I got Todd and I got best fishes. Oh, she said best wishes for me. Huh, she still drew the fish. Maybe she just changing the first letter. I mean, why draw the fish? Yeah, would you sign my yearbook? Yeah, absolutely. Can I sign yours?

Uh, oh god, this is awkward. Um, can I tell you what I would write and then you can deem it fit? It's gonna be even more awkward if you do it that way. Uh, okay. Because I'll just tell you right now it is a blanket no and it's not because of anything that you were gonna write. I, I'm putting my yearbook into a time capsule, like right after graduation, and so I, I kind of want it like, uh, pristine. Oh, people are still doing that? My family does it, yeah.

Oh, can I put something in? It's, ugh, god. Uh, stop asking questions. Uh, the answer's gonna be no. It's gonna be the other blanket no. Okay, excuse me one second Hey Todd will you sign my your book Me hmm. Oh Okay, it is Todd's timed well addels time to shine. Let's see here something funny. Hey Aaron lie last What does that mean don't forget to eat your goat cheese um why was is a love you like a sister Okay

Let me scratch that out I should have you should have talked about versus just writing it hey other time Do you want to sign my ear book me other Todd? Oh, I would love to you. I did just put my pen in a time capsule Bomber yeah, so I officially, I'm not signing anymore here, but it's, I'm gonna split it. Okay, what best wishes? In the time capsule, sure. It's a family, it's like a family tradition

that my family still does. Oh wait, Aaron, hey Aaron. Uh huh. Yeah. I just, I was reading over your shoulder and I saw that Philip had a really funny thing. Can I just write plus, addle next to Philip's name?

So, really want that to be how I remember you as you trying to get on with someone else's joke? Well, I just think ten years from now you'll see it and you'll assume that came from both of us Yeah, I cracked open my dad's time capsule when I was out there and so I got his Yearbook so now I'm cracked open your dad's casket. All right. Yeah, you can so that says that now But then I put an arrow Todd tried to take credit for someone else's joke so I don't forget what happened All right, yeah, you can so that says that now, but then I put an arrow Todd tried to take credit for someone else's joke so I don't forget what happened Yeah, my dad was

Unfortunately, the old way the family tradition was was you had to sign a son Before you graduated Because then you got buried in your casket Time capsule art and when your son hit 18, of course, obviously, graduation. Sure. Yeah. And then dig it up. Aren't all caskets time capsules?

If you think about it. They're definitely stink capsules. They're definitely smell capsules. Did not, was that really prepared as much for that for the kind of the wave? Well, I just realized that my yearbook was actually just a copy of sense and sensibility So starting from scratch

Aaron JPC. I'll see you around Before we go let's all on the kind of three. Let's all say what college we're going to one two one two three Mark

college Aaron what was yours? Don't remember two three college Aaron what was yours don't remember bye Fans read it if you remember what college we're all going to Happy four-year anniversary happy four-year anniversary or real anniversary even four years which technically have been recording for a longer than four years But one tequila to tequila three tequila four years which we've technically have been recording for a longer than four years But one tequila to tequila three tequila four years Is the shirt that I'm wearing okay? I just took four shots of tequila. I hope I sit well in my stomach for the episode Four is the pumpkin anniversary so did you guys get me pumpkin related anniversary gifts?

I carved a jackaliner and out of a watermelon Okay, yeah, I, pumpkins were at the stores. It's July, so. And I cut off your head and replaced it with a pumpkin. Oh, it looks good. What's your pumpkin? Would you buy that head? I can't believe it's been four years.

Does it feel like four years to you? It doesn't, it doesn't. Okay. It feels like both four weeks and it feel like four years to you? It doesn't it doesn't. Okay. It feels like both four weeks and it feels like 40 years. So do with that what you will. Interesting. Interesting. It's weird that half of our shelf life has been over zoom.

Well, sad. I I miss recording in person. Agreed. Which is why I think our live shows are so fun. And I missed a recording in person. And we're like oil and water. We don't get a log. I will say doing the live shows is so fun. And thank you to everyone who came out to our Chicago live show. What a treat would a joy. So fun people. No, thank you to those who came out to the LA live show.

That was easy for you. Okay. Thank them already. No. I want to shit. But anyway, it comes out that's not Chicago. No, thank already. No, I wanted to do it. Shit. I knew when it comes out that's not Chicago. No, thank you. Well, I do want to put on blast. Our Kansas City live show, zero people in attendance. Yeah. I guess it's because we didn't do one. Yeah, it's probably.

We didn't book it. We didn't go there. Yeah. And we didn't put it at the show on. But I can't remember if we didn't book it because nobody showed up or if we didn't, people didn't show up because we didn't. Yeah, we get lost in this,

us with how all that stuff works. Catch 22. Exactly. Speaking of what you'd be saying, it was a bad audience. Catch these 22 eggs. Catch these hands, God. Aaron, are you,

Aaron, are you old man puzzles today? Well, what do you think? I think yes. Can we get into our, for four years, we should do at least four riddles. I feel like. We'll see if I even decide to do one. I'm... You don't get to pick how many riddles we do when we're not old man puzzles.

No, you're right. We should. That's a classic, that's a classic Hey Riddle, Riddle, Miss Step. That's a Riddle faux pas. I'm not old man puzzles. I think maybe we do 10 today. That's a Riddle faux pas and faux maw. Aaron, do you feel, Aaron, I wanna ask you this.

Yes, of course. Do you feel like doing riddles today? Let me see, checking in with my body, my jaw feels tight. Body keeps the score. Yeah, my, yeah. Yeah, body knows, body knows. She's a good, you two.

Yeah, creating. Creating, you two. Creating levels. Aaron, you are jack crazy. Yeah, crazy. No, crazy. You are jacked. No, body does not feel like doing riddles, but you don't always get what you want. Wow. I, for the record, I just, we took a little break in between recording the opening bit and then coming into this.

I did go and pee and my body is technically right now in riddle ketosis. So I am perfectly attuned to doing riddles. This is the best time to do riddles for me. See, I had riddles for breakfast and lunch, so I'm like overload on riddles. Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it. Adel how you doing? I went to the bathroom as well during the break. I peed in my toilet standing up, but the piss hit the water and for some reason jetted

back into my mouth. It hit at such an angle it went back into my mouth. So I'm in a line. You are really, you are running out of excuses to wire drink in your own pee. I'm in a car in Malatosis. I'm in a car in Malatosis. That's so funny. The only way to get out ofitosis to be in your mouth.

That's what Hallitosis is, right? You pissing your own mouth and people hate it. So I have some listener submitted riddles. The first one comes from Liz. It's what a weird trick. The first ones come from Liz, they them. They say, hey, Erin, GBC and Adel, and maybe Janet. Ah, Liz, you just missed her.

You just missed her. We'll pass it along. You think Liz is. I don't know Liz. But Liz wrote some word avalanches. Uh oh. Thank God Janet left. She hate these.

So what are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? Writing these original word avalanches for us. Are you ready? Yes, this is amazing. But spoke word avalanches. Can I ask a question about the email list?

Did they say that they like the show? Or is this like, because we get a lot of means bearded rental submissions? Well all I know about is that they are they have like an excellent sense of judgment because they were going to read these to us at our July third live show in Chicago and then realize that this was probably not going to be the easiest way. And then at the end of the day, they say such nice stuff that I will read to you when we're not recording. Yeah, that's feel like a lot of people submit riddles who no longer listen to the podcast that are just trying to ruin it for others.

Yeah. Yeah, and Harper did read some riddles at the July live show and we really gave it to him. So maybe, maybe Liz chose correctly here. Yeah, they just are slowly lowering their hands and putting them over their head. okay so an inappropriate broadcasting of the guy who played Harvey Dent and a podcast host with an excellent taste in sweaters make mistakes while out shopping on inappropriate broadcasting of the guy who played Harvey Dent and a podcast host with excellent taste and sweaters

Making mistakes while out shopping. Okay, so Aaron's gonna be the host with the sweater Aaron Eckhart is gonna be I think it might be Tommy Lee Jones. I think it might be Billy D&D Williams Inside joke between JVZ and I Want to be a part of every inside joke that you two have. It's done. No more two person inside jokes. They're done now. It's just- Three faces.

Yeah. So three faces the new Batman movie? Yeah. Because I need to be included. Uh-huh. There's a third chest on my- There's a third face on my chest. There's a third chest.

I know we mentioned this in my dream. I know we mentioned this off-air, but in my dream last night, Adel murdered me and now I'm on edge. She- I woke up to a text that Aaron just said, I had a dream that you murdered me last night. So happy Monday and I was like, I don't know what to do with this information. I do like how Aaron said,

I know we just mentioned this in my dream. And that is the biggest, like I know we just talked about this in my dream, but I have to read it, all right. Yeah, you guys, I'm on edge. I got murdered last night by my, who I thought was my friend. I thought you were my friend, Addle. It's honestly, it's usually, it's usually a person

that you think is your friend that murders you. That's what they say. It's always someone you, befriend. So Aaron, Aaron, maybe is the, is Aaron part of it? An inappropriate, no. An inappropriate. No, inappropriate. So what would be inappropriate broadcasting? Error error, airing. Error would be a broad cast.

A blank airing of. So inappropriate. Sounds like Aaron. An inappropriate. An air error. In a property. Get in a brand. Is that an air air You know Propriet get on a brine. Uh-huh

Is that a brain airing air in? No, you it's a blank airing and Lose looking my leg it's in your dreams and air it's it's blank air in as an air in Eckhart no and a and blank airing a I R I G so that's a broadcast. Yeah of Aaron. Okay. So is errant and errant. Yeah, errant is inappropriate Mm-hmm. So an errant of Aaron and Aaron Mm-hmm. And then what's the last two words? Can you remind me with the clues? Excellent. Tastes in sweaters making mistakes

Air air air shopping airing airing Airons yeah, say it all together an Airing of Aaron and Aaron airing airing I'm glowing cuz I'm hearing my name over and over again No, Aaron I think you put on that 1920s maker. It's all wet. And it's burning and it's poison and it's already in my blood.

It's all wet. You hear to being the most beautiful woman alive. Miss Isatope, 1920. All right, next. A retired late-night hosts in offensive Bird-powered computer invented by a cutoff wearing podcast host in the year in ocean. I do want to see you seen Craig kill boards board to kill boards

I do want to see a quick scene. Yes, I'm gonna be Jay Leno and I'm gonna come up to you each intern to do a little segment that I like to call Jay Walking. Hey everybody I'm here on the street Jay Leno here and there. That's the big. No, crazy Jay. You're crazy Jay. Yo Kevin, Kevin, you're being heavy. I never even give it up for Kevin, you're being.

Jay, no. No, no, no, no You actually cut a negative You be kind of negative no Jay no so I here's a clip of me going out on the street I asked people Excuse me ma'am sorry my son is choking do you know? Sorry, I have something a little more important kid. Can you name who the vice president is right now? He's turning blue my son. Can you I know you're turning blue because the other Democrats so that means it would be my son please

someone help my son. It's not my son. Oh who the who's the famous boxer who fought uh Evanie Holyfield and bit off his ear? It's okay, honey. I'm gonna save you. It would have been prime time to stay my son, but Jay! No, Jay! Kevin, how did you get out here? Jay, the woman's son's dying Jay! Please!

Help her Jay! Pretty good impression, Adel! Thank you. I've never done it before, never will again. No, we don't know that. I might have you do it later. Okay, Iel. Thank you. I've never done it before. Never will a good. No, we don't know that. I might have you do it later. Okay, I'm calling it out. No matter what scene Adel is in today, he has to play his J-Leno. Come on, this is prison. You murdered me.

I murdered you in my sleep as well. Oh, God. This is your punishment. So I assume it's J, because there's a blue bird which would be a blue J and then J Leno. A retired late-night host, inoffensive blue bird. So it's positive real quick. So a retired late-night host is J.

J, what was the next part? Inoffensive blue bird. Inoffensive, is that just J or is inoffensive part of it? There's not all of them will have J in it. Inoffensive. Inoffensive, which would be. J or is the offensive part of it? There's not all of them will have J in it. Inoffensive. Inoffensive, which would be. Inoffensive. Inoffensive Bluebird.

What's the name for a Bluebird? Is it a kind of a Bluebird? Like a Blue J Peacock. That part has, the Bluebird part has to be J, right? I think that's gonna help you is inoffensive. This is a, someone, like, oh wait, you would describe it like as a comic who doesn't say anything else.

Oh, clean? Like, yeah, but like, doesn't push the boundaries. It's, it's two letters. Two letters, easy. That are the second two letters. Oh, PC, PC. Yeah, J's PC. J's PC, J's PC J

What's the rest of what's the rest of the thing? So that this is hard because if they're all gonna be kind of Out of order the answer is out of order from with the Order in which you get them. Okay, so if you just get all of the Words all yeah, what's the full thing? A retired late-night hosts, inoffensive bluebird-powered computer invented by a cut-off wearing pie pastos in the urine ocean.

So Jays PC PC. Yeah, but that's sort of out of, yeah, Jays PC and then your name. JPC. Jays PC. and then your name. JPC. Jays, PC, and then your name. JPC, was it urine, PC? And then urine, and then the ocean. Pacific. No.

The sea, the sea. Yeah. And then the retired are like a blue. J. Yeah, J. Blue, the sun is joking. And then the computer. PC. PC. Blue... J? Yeah, J? Blue, the sun who's joking? And then the computer.

PC. PC. All right, now sit all together. Aaron, can you just read it? Wait, I don't get it. So I don't understand. Why is it a percentage? Why is it a percentage of the...

It's the answer's out of order. What has that happened? So four times 12. Four times 12 plus 10. But no, put the number before that. Put the number before the four times 12. You can't just do three things that are JPC. It'd be like, yeah, but you gotta figure out the order.

JPC, JPC, PC, JPC. Aaron, I'm gonna cut that audio and play that your funeral to make you sound insane. Okay, well, I'm not gonna be there idiot because my friend murdered me. I'm not even gonna be there for you to be satisfied with the gacha. Now normally we don't let killers come up to at the funeral and play an audio clip but who can turn down this face. Hey, hey, everybody, I'm gonna do some J-locking.

Oh, J, please don't. Okay, we're moving on. We're moving on. Maybe we're gonna get on Ricklose, eh? Because we have to go on a break soon. Alright, last one from Liz. The father of a plaid loving podcast host who will put some herbs on a confused barbie belonging to the author of the BFG. So the father of ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad ad I think I can't. I think if the Addle and Addle and Addle. Oh, we're gonna get it. I think I can't.

I think if the last one thought is anything, I think I can. We'll hold on the father of a plaid wearing podcast so this would be Shoki. So I'm dying to see where this goes. Addles, Addles dad, Addle, Addles. You know, Addles. So it's like, Addles dad will, but combine dad and will. Addles dad, Addle. My dad add all dad all my dad's will what

did he leave me what did he leave me this this podcast so I hope you like it add all dad all that's good dad all add you'll put some herbs on so add add all dad all add deal huh to the roll a Cosa who wrote BFG who wrote BFG roll doll dolls. Yeah, so addles daddle add Dill Dill to dolls and then when you're just riddled with something your Addled, huh, and then Barbie is Is hot no barbie Margo Margo Roby. What is she dream house? I don't see a doll a doll. Mm-hmm. No, there's you don't you don't have to do a doll just doll Dolls so addles that all add to do uh-huh to dolls

Addle doll. Yeah That one's really fun to say Addles daddle add dill to dolls add a doll I'm gonna do we should each do our own Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Adults, Addles, Dattles, Dildes, Addles, Addles, Dall. I love that. Thank you, Liz. Thank you, Liz. We're super sweet in their email.

Thank you for writing original riddles. And we appreciate you. Let's go on a really quick break so I can reset my face after reading all of that. A quick break, break, quick, quick, quick, break, break, quick, quick, break. Oh, JBC's broken. I think I did it. I think you're a break, break, break, go. Yeah.

Yeah. Hey, JPC, you know how I love, he looks sleep. I love that he looks mattress brand, especially nice sleep in my life I know not everyone is on board yet. So I secured Award winning sleeper Merrill sleep. She's right behind that door Merrill sleep. Wow. She won the golden pillow for best sleep That's right. Hey, Merrill Hello

Yes Hey, Merrill. Hello, yes, hello, yes, I'm very well rested after sleeping on my midnight lux, Helix Madras. Good to see you. Good to see you. Your naps are stunning. I just wanted you to tell people about Helix sleep, how the Helix lineup offers 20 unique mattresses, including the award-winning lux collection. The newly released Helix Elite Collection, a mattress design for big and tall sleepers, even a mattress made just for kids. Yeah, and Helix knows there's no better way to test out a new mattress than by sleeping on it in your own home. That's why they offer a 100-night trial in a 10 to 15-year warranty to try out the new Helix mattress. Who do you, who, who did I think you were? I don't know. Meryl, I'm Meryl sleep and I know everybody is unique and everybody sleeps differently.

I just recommend taking the Helix sleep quiz and you can figure out what mattress is right cheap for you. I don't know if you're a side sleeper or you sleep hot or cold or if you sleep like me, Meryl sleep. Yeah, choosing the right mattress is a real Sophie's decision, but don't just take our word for it or Meryl sleeps word for it. He looks has been awarded the number one mattress picked by GQ and Wired Magazine.

It was even recommended by multiple leading chiropractors and doctors of sleep medicine. Shh. I don't think I thought you were the person that she's doing it. Oh, she's doing it. Who are, what a performance. Helix mattresses all come with a 10 to 15 year warranty

depending on the model. Oh, stunning. Yeah, look, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helixsleep.com slash riddle. This is their best offer yet. And it will not last long with helix better sleep starts now. Go ahead and give her the Academy of Snorr. The snorr. Academy of Snorr. You know what?

You mean Academy of Snorr. Glint close to falling asleep. That's why you're. Oh, yeah. I got that a lot. Hey, Adel, hey, Aaron, I got a bone to pick with the two of you. Sure, yeah, I wore the skeleton outfit just because I figured this was coming. Happy Halloween a few months early. It's not yet the... What is it? So you know how the two of you, I was like, guys, I am always so hungry for lunches and dinners and the like and you, jokers told me, oh, JPC, it's okay.

All you have to do is take some, you know, American paper currency, tape it to your front door, close the door, and then wait until someone brings you food. Well, I kept opening the door and the money was gone. So I had to tape more money to my door. I think you think you didn't work at all. Oh, Dorkash. Dorkash. Yeah, you did dorkash. We told you D thinking to work out all. Oh, door cash. Dork cash.

Yeah, you did dork cash. We told you door dash is the number one thing to you. What the hunk? With door dash, you'll enjoy next level convenience with delivery in the hour, making it easier than ever to get whatever you want delivered to your house, whether that be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I eat back to school supplies. But what?

JPC, all your favorite retail, grocery and convenience stores are on the app so you can chop everything, your kids, your dogs, your family might need for back to school. And hey, personally, just yesterday, I bought some marshes homemade premium quality buck eyes, you know, those candies that are chocolate stuffed with peanut butter. I just got those from DoorDash and they were they were on my porch within 20 minutes and it's very very dangerous because they're delicious. Did you fill your belly and your pantry? Uh, yes. Did you fill your backpack? I did. Okay, well then DoorDash has come again for the gold. I remember

distinctively the stress of going back to school and going from store to store to get all my favorite snacks and pencils and pencil cases and all the things that I needed me and my siblings and I remember how stressed my mom was and I know that she would have loved to have DoorDash so she could be prepared before the big back to school day arrived. So you can stock up with go-to breakfast lunch box staples and brands that you love. Don't eat my school supplies JPC. You can see but that eraser down.

Put that trapper keeper down your mouth is too small. Never been told that before. Shop door dash to get everything you need for the back to school season delivered right to your door. Order now for stress free back to school shopping. Use promo code riddle to get 50% off up to $10 value. When you spend $15 or more at convenience, grocery, or retail stores on DoorDash, that's 50% off up to a $10 value. When you spend $15 or more, promo code RIDDLE, don't forget JPC because you keep eating those school supplies. That's code RIDDLE for 50% off your next order, Terms Apply. At all, JPC keeps eating my gel pens.

Thanks, Dorakash. I mean, no, that's the one. That one didn't work. That one's bad. Hey, JPC. Yeah. You're not in trouble. I just need help.

I'm pranking Atal, and I'm sending up a website to prank him. Okay. I just need help. I'm Prinking at all and I'm setting up a website to bring him. I just need some advice. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace I'm not I'm not mad at you. We're pranking at all spaces to all the one website platform entrepreneurs to stand out and to see it online whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website at gauge with your audience and editing to see it online, whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand. Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website engaged with your audience. And so anything for products to cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms.

Hey, Otto, come here, come here, come here. Hey, what's going on? I actually, I want to prank JPC and I want to set up a whole website to prank him. Do you have anything that like, is there like an online store, like it set up on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace,

you can have custom merch, you can easily sell custom merch and create passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production, and inventory and shipping are handled for you, saving you time and money. What is happening okay? Wait, what's going on with that all oh nothing nothing?

I'm just setting up a very normal square space website not a prank thing new he's gonna shoot you And I'm gonna use analytics use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from That's pretty cool I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my Prank website for Prank's Artoology. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for?

I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. Prank. With Squarespace. With Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party tools to extend the functionality of your website Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, battle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine Dude, we got her anyway if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine head to squarespace.com for a free trial

And when you're ready to launch go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back. She's back. Hey, Aaron. Hey, Aaron. Can we go to grandma's house? Wait.

I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. Hey, Rick, go, Rick. Hello, everyone. And welcome back to our four year anniversary show. Raise your hand if you make your making it to five. Sorry, Adel's gone and a president's here. Hi Mr. President. Hello, my name is Honest Haib. Why do you look like Jay Leno? You can't me. Yeah. You're a little pretty special. Thank you. Keep them honest.

Keep them honest. That's why they call it honest day because it's just like Jay Leno. I can't tell a lot except for when I read the wacky headline. Do you see this? Do you hear about this? I'm enjoying this. I regret this. I've been enjoying it.

I never dip into my tonight's show, money. Yes, you do. Yeah. But somehow I. Yes, you do. Yeah. Yeah. But somehow I own 4,000 cars. Yeah, what is that? Is it, is it, is it, you never dipped in the tonight's share money,

but he just made all that money doing stand up? Yes, but it's also insane to be like, he's got to be 71 or 72. It's insane to be like, I'm 72. I have $350 million in the bank that I will not touch because I don't want to fuck up my future finances. And it's like, what are you doing, buddy? What is will not touch?

Like, is it just sitting there depreciating or is he actually like investing that money? Like, what does he mean will not touch? Because basically, if that's true, his money just loses 8% every year. Oh, yeah. Interest doesn't keep up with inflation. We all know that. We all know this. Except, maybe, you know, does it know this. What was that Aaron? Nothing. Hey everybody, hereby this interest doesn't keep up with this. So I'm ruined. Should have touched that money.

Hereby this. So funny. He's got more riddles. He's got more riddles. He's got more riddles. Him and Kevin U-Banks, him and Kevin U-Banks have a daytime TV show. What? That's only ever seen. Hold on. Well, waiting in the lobby of like a doctor's office or an auto mechanic and- It is yours? Yes. How have I never heard about this?

Because it's new, it's new-ish. What you have- You heard about this? You heard about this? This man cannot let go. He keeps retiring and then he's like, I can't do this, I can't be home. Kevin, Kevin, you have to-

I can't do this by tonight, so money. I can't be lower than my thoughts. Kevin, you heard about this? I can't sit alone with Kevin, Kevin, you have to be a bit denied to tell money. I can't be lower than my thoughts. Kevin, you know what I'm saying? I can't sit alone with my thoughts. Okay, hold on, you've just heard into the semester of the cat. Kevin, you had about this suffering, fuck it, eh?

Fuck it, I sure like it, that putty cat. Um. And then Kevin, you being such a twitty bird? Yeah. So these next listeners submitted riddles, and by the way, by the way, if you want to send us some riddles, especially if they're original, send them to HRRpodcast at gmail.com or leave us a voicemail and we'll give you that number later. But these are Tyler and I cannot stress enough if you are putting your riddles on the HMS podcast.

That ship is going to be destroyed as part of a weapons test. That ship is going to be destroyed as part of a weapons test I'll do a ship of sale Well, it's already sailed it's held like three years ago. They keep building more of the fucking things They load them up with less of a riddles and then they put about the middle of the ocean and fucking sink them I am the one who tries your gender General It's down there. These fucking riddles just don't do it. Just don't put them on the boats. Then I'm in the email It's easier you have to go to a dock. Yeah, that's true. He's not like Joe Biden.

It's easier. Get on the put them on the dock. Why? Why, why, why, why, why? We're all discovering impressions today. Not me. Never me. It's fine.

OK, so. I once again ask you to discover an impression. Nancy Pelosi. It's Pelosi. Yay. OK. Nobody's safe. All right, you guys be serious. These are from Tyler. and a pressure Nancy Pelosi it's Pelosi okay nobody safe you guys be serious these are from Tyler and Tyler is so sweet Tyler he him we can say his name

and at the end of the riddles he apologizes okay that's in the indicator of how he just cares that we have to do riddles and he feels that all right so these are 10 movie mashup riddles. I'll give the synopsis of a brand new movie created by mashing together any two movies or shows. The answer is formed by hitting the mashing together the two titles. Okay, hell yeah, this is exciting.

Yes, okay. Aaron, are we allowed to use knowledge that we have from outside of the game to sell these riddles? No Aaron resetting you as little babies. Aaron will any of these be adult films? I think they all are going to be If you work in that industry, we're about to give you 10 fresh hot new names. Julia Julia, Louis Dreyfus with LL Cool J. That would be Veepe Goat. Is it the movie Veepe Goat? Okay, I don't want to look at your search history ever.

Remind me to never, ever, ever go on your computer. Every time you go on your computer to look something up, I want you to knock it right out of my hands and onto the floor. And if you want to protect yourself from weird searches, use Veepe Goat. And Veepe Go protect yourself from weird searches, use Vipgoat. Vipgoat, a VPN and also a board. A vice president's a goat. That doesn't sound like a kids movie where it's like a Disney plus movie. Yeah. The vice president's a goat.

Quart Tyler right now is thinking, well, they're about to do my riddles and then they keep not doing them. And I just want to hear my riddles read on the show. We're getting to them. We're getting to him Tyler. Okay. A golden retriever descends on an umbrella to use magic in a song to help two British children and their busy father discover there's nothing in the rule book against family.

Ted Poppins. Ted Poppins. Ted Poppins. Ted Poppins. Ted Lasse. Oh. I'm frozen. I'm frozen in happiness. Give me bad news quickly. Airbud poppins Ted lassie oh Frozen I'm frozen in happiness. Give me bad news quickly. I'm too happy. Give me bad news Bad news Adel bad news

Goats the vice president bad news Adel bad news Okay, so I Pops it's Mary poppins and Airbud, right? Yeah, but how do you say it? Airy Poppins. No. AIRI, Airy Poppins. Mary Buttons. Mary Harry.

Harry Poppins out of that. Mary Airbuddy Poppins. Mary Airbuddy Poppins. Okay. Mary Buddy Poppins. Like, Mary Buddy Poppins. So all the answers to this will be strokes. Well, no, no, no, no.

Is air, I thought they were like one word combined into the second word, but that was one word like turduckened into the middle. Yeah. So they, is that all of them will be in the middle or they can be in the middle? They can be. Okay, okay, okay.

We can be. Lord Tyler, you didn't fuck up there. That's not on you. No. Don't feel bad about that with Tyler. That's on me. That's on me. Laura Ingalls is about to get a little wilder. Girls gone wilder. Nope. What a golden retriever joins her family's Midwest adventures. Air butt on the prairie., little house on the air buddy.

Hold on, little house on the air buddy. There's no rules that set a girl in the prairie. Can't play basketball. You're so close. Little house, little house on the prairie buddy. Yep. Nice, prairie buddy. I'm crying.

Okay, here's the next one. These are all gonna be air butt. You don't know that a young man is from West Philadelphia to live with his wealthy golden retrievers. Fresh prints of bell air butt. They're massive dog house. Fresh prints of bell air butt. Philadelphia air butt.

Ha ha ha ha. Tom Hanks and Philadelphia air butt. I wanna see a scene. Okay. Erin, you are a young lady who lives on a pretty rare farm. And JPC, you are a new dog that she discovers and you have the power of flight. Well, hello there. Oh my goodness. You have something stuck in your paw. Let me get it out for you, small dog. Aww, poor baby. One, two, up, there you go. All better. Yeah. Well, I'm sorry, Captain, they're ready for you. Oh, good. I read in my hip, it puts on some shoes. What's going on?

We're nice to meet you. I gotta be going. Look, I'm not off in the sea of Louis, but if I ever, I give you a call. Um, sorry, I live in this farm with my family and you're talking dog. Did I hit my head on the bridge this morning? Look, I mean, I gotta lay little bit of a weirdo coming back. Attention everyone, Labridelta Flight 204 to Cincinnati will be leaving in two minutes. That's my brain.

Well, I'm living on the prairie in the past and I don't know what any of this future is. It was not meeting you, obviously, so I'm gonna work out. of this huge object is. It was Ned meeting you obviously, he's not gonna work out. That's don't really matter. But I'll be here in a couple of weeks if you're bearing any time, if you wanna do it. It's okay, I never really actually met you. It's clear that I hit my head pretty hard.

Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. No, this is a captain of a air delta flight, air delta retriever, what was it? The Delta retriever. See. Okay. Hahaha.

Hahaha. I was about to say Sarah, wake up. You hit your head pretty hard kissing that dog. Hahaha. A boy runs away to an island filled with golden retrievers who make them their king in the Spike Jones adaptation of the classic picture book. Where the wild things are, Rebud? Where the wild things are, error, buddy? Where the, where the, error,

air, bud, the wild things are. Yeah, where bud, the wild things are. Where bud, the wild things are. Okay, gotcha, gotcha. Interesting. Definitely. Um, Adelaide, I think you in particular will like this one for so many reasons. You'll see that in a second. Daniel DeLua shines as a prospector who will stop. There will be air, but we'll be right back. Hold on. Nothing to adopt all the golden retrievers during the golden retriever boom of the late

19th and early 20th centuries. Okay. Come on. Now, what did what the Tyler do that is? Hell areas. He did the best for he came up with the perfect title. What did he do? is hilarious? He did the best for, he came up with the perfect title. What did he do? Their butt will be blood.

Okay, yeah, but he did it. Airbud will, there they're there. Bud, they're bud. They're bud. There will be blood. They're bud. Their bud will be airbud. Yeah, there you go.

You got it. That is, that is fucking incredible. I knew you would love that. I drink your milk shake, which I shouldn't have because I'm a dog and chocolate kills me. Jay. Jay. That's your 10th, man.

This is my son and my partner, Airbud. Let's dangle, they do this. Twins? I really want that to catch on. For people to say, let's dangle, they do this. Well, how do we make that happen? How do we make the world? He's not acting anymore, right? He's not acting anymore. Hey, Addle, come back. Yeah.

We let go and let God. That's how we do that. We let go of it. We let go. And we let God. Would be believing good. Wouldn't it be funny if like Daniel DeLuis quit acting and then he just did like direct to DVD screwball comedies? Like that's if you did like American Pie six or something, I would be like this is the greatest thing that's ever happened. Yeah. I would love stiffer. You have to know stiffer that what you chase you fought my mom.

Because you drink my milk shake. That's what it is. You drink my milk shake. My milkshake. Yes. We got we got to write this script. How much money? How much money do you think it would take,

Daniel DeLuis to agree to come on like a direct to the DVD, American Pie 18's like, fuck camp. Buddy. Just to come on to do a scene where he says, you drank my milk shake. Buddy, the thing with Danielis is it's not about money. For everybody, it's about money. There's about money. For everybody it's about money.

There's a price. No, there's no. How much is for him to make their bud will be air blood? How much? He's married to, I wanna say Arthur Miller's daughter. Martha Miller? Martha Miller. I think he's married to Arthur Miller's daughter.

So between the two of them, they are not struggling. Just like Jalen, oh, they're not struggling for money. Wait, is Arthur Miller, was he rich? He was a player for sure. Yeah, residuals married to Marilyn Monroe. Okay. So this next one is twin golden retrievers at doggy camp devise a clever play to make their parents fall back in love. Buzz the pair the pair air bud trip trap. That's the same. The pair air bud trap. Yeah, the pair bud and trap. That one doesn't work as well.

Pear buddent. Yeah, Tyler, I love the F. I see, I see that pair bud. Okay. I like it. Regis asks 15 multiple choice questions to get a million air bud. Yeah.

On their way to becoming Golden Retriever. Perfect. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What? That's not a movie. Yes, it is. Who wants to be a billionaire at a movie? Yeah.

It's the, it's the Bollywood one. Oh, slumdog millionaire butt. Thank you. Movies are TV shows. Oh, it can be TV shows. Because the French, the French, the French, the French, Prince of Bollyair. The French have a saying. Wait, is a French, is it the French, the Prince of Bollyair? No, it's it can be TV shows are the French the French the fresh Prince of Belier The French have a saying wait is a fresh prince of is it the French presence of Belier? No, it's not

It's in West Vider sire blown and raised with cheddar on my bag at the everyday And this podcast is free right I said I said one little man did my mother got scared She said you're moving to France with your friend then they're sad. That doesn't work. Every other part of it works. Cut out that part. Cut that, Casey, Casey put a big beep over that. Actually that's great.

Casey just put a beep on it and then let's all do a react. We're like, oh shit, that rhymed. No. How did I not? I said, I said mentally, I subconsciously set myself up to rhyme married with Belair and I totally ignored it.

Yeah. Okay. It happens. JPC, I think you will like this one. A group of criminal golden retrievers being transported to the super max boutique over the plane. Yes, it's gone air, but a golden retriever. Why couldn't you put down the bunny?

A golden retriever handles the most difficult. Actually, I like to see a scene. Um, uh, JPC, you are a golden retriever and you're auditioning for Conair and Adel, you are the casting agent. Hey, okay, come on in. So, you know, you've read the script and, um, you know, the motivations and the lines. So what are you- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I know they ran you know being rinsed. I'm just here from the studio to drive up his head getting caused And a little bit in war, you know, yeah Yeah, yeah, you understand what's your well off of your uncle is ahead of paramount So we had to a little bit of my uncle's head is a parachute

That's what it is your uncle's head is a parachute. I'm about it and has he deployed yet or died No, he's still packed up. He packed up in a minute. Okay, so whenever you're ready, just go ahead and have a dime. And Captain, and Captain, they are ready for you. I'm available. I'm available. I'm ready.

I'm ready. Okay, well, he wants you to do the part. I'll do the part, okay. Are you flying a mouth, mouth wet flight? Rubber? Uh, flying mouth wet? Very efficient to my people. There. Oh, I'm not sure you have a mouth-mouth wet flight? Rubber? Uh, flying mouth wet? Very offended with my people. Veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Okay, go ahead. I'm alchemist. John, who's that?

It can't possibly say that in the script. It does. It's a magic ring. It's not good. There's really called cold meaning, cold meaning of coming to that. Cold meaning? Can you hear that through my head? Cold meaning.

Cold meaning, I don't know. Cold meaning. Cold meaning, is that a person? You don't know how hard it is to say the actor coal Meanie I can't tell I don't comb meanie The captain saying comb meanie. Okay, can he say re-smooth, shemi? Okay, I'm very offended by people today No, my best friends this could be do

Jay Jay What is this? I don't know if I'm one of my best friends, this Scooby-Doo. Jay! Jay! Scene. What is this show? Perfect. It's a speedy. That's the second time I've done a dog and the fifth time I've done Kevin Ubex. My mom is gonna call me tomorrow and be like, what'd you do yesterday? I'm gonna go, I played Jay Leno casting Conair to a dog.

Casey said, no, bad. Bad scene. Okay, you get two more. A golden retriever handles the most difficult criminal defense cases in this best-selling series of novels adapted for TV, film, and radio. Con, Aaron Brockovich. No.

Damn. That's great. Um, boys, this is gotta be one of those shows that I don't care about. Is this gonna be the good, the good lawyer? Bloody Mason. Bloody Mason. Law, the good lawyer. Bloody Mason. Buddy Mason. Law and order SU dog.

Buddy Mason. There. I know that name. I know Perry Mason. Oh, oh, oh, uh, Perry Buddy Mason. Right? Mm-hmm. Got it.

Oh, air IC. Yes, it is. You're giving me, you're giving me the air book part. Yes, good, yes. Yeah, thank you. Um, look, I have no idea what this one's about, but I know it has golden retrievers and it's based on the book by Charlotte Bronte. Charlotte Bronte, one of the least popular Bronte sisters.

This would be the woman's first in life. Jane Erbadi. Yeah. Sorry, Jane Erbadi. A thousand apologies and 2,000 your welcomes from Tyler. Thank you, Tyler. You clearly have listened to the show for quite some time and had an understanding of what we would like. Tyler. So thank you for taking the time to make those. I hate to put limitations on your Tyler. We will accept 50,000 more of those and not a single one more. Yeah, you have to do 50,000 more.

You're capped at 50,000 submissions, Tyler. We're going to hold your feet to the fire on that one, buddy. We hate to do it, but we have to make the rules. We have to make the fire call. I'm not sure you noticed, but all of them were airbud. You noticed. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Um, Jay B.C., can we have some voicemails, please? Dude, you don't even gotta ask because I love playing these voicemails, Casey. We're waiting for the beef, hey riddle, riddle. I wanna get the calls on the voice man, yo let out the play.

And I'll hit play. You all are amazing. I just wanna say thank you and if this is anything like the e-mail, this will be played in about five years on an episode. So I wanted to say to my teacher self, hello, if you haven't asked for the mayor, you are a coward. Good day, sir.

Wow, I don't think he thought that would be played to each other. So you got to pull the trigger now, buddy. So I got to pull the plug now. I'm not waking up. I don't know what the state of this relationship is, but congratulations, I guess, on this kind of like shotgun wedding on the podcast. He's like, oh no, I thought I had five years I have no money saved we just started dating we've been dating for four months. Oh god

I have no money saved, but your Arthur Miller's daughter. So it'll be fine. It'll be fine. You're a Miller. You're a Miller's crossing Yeah, and I guess if you want to propose to someone in the voicemails, that, you know, feel free to use the voicemails for that. I, whoa, shit, I forgot to say that number. That number is 1, 805, riddle 1, 805, riddle 1. Empire. I think today's another one. One more.

Let's see, let's hear the other one. Wait, hold on. We gotta facilitate some sort of proposal. Oh, we have to. Right. How about I'll ask, I'll ask. sort of proposal. Oh, we have to. How about I'll ask, I'll ask. Hey, he said her, right? Yes, I think so.

I don't remember. Great, hey. It's me, Erin Keave, from the podcast, Hey, Vretal Rital. You know that proposal you're looking for? Well, listen to this. Yeah. What's the name of the guy?

I don't fucking know. What am I, Captain Memory over here? Did he say the guy? I don't fucking know what am I Captain memory over here. Did he say his name? I don't think so. Okay so you that you know your boyfriend's voice. If that's your boyfriend I'm Aaron Keith. I'm here to propose for him. Hi. Will you marry him? He's gonna be so nice to you. He's going to do 50% of the labor. I don't know that. He's better be because I if he's not the best husband ever he'll have to answer to you. He's going to do 50% of the labor. You don't know that. He's better be because if he's not the best husband ever, he'll have to answer to me. That's the Aaron Keith guarantee. So answer to you means you'll read him a riddle and he has to give you the answer.

Yeah, basically I, my dream job is yelling at other people's husbands when they actually say so give me a call and I'll figure it out, but he's going to treat you right. So say yes. She said yes. Wh- She said yes, okay great. Next voice mail. Oh! I hope that all works out. Hey, Riddle Riddle, I got a bone to take with you.

Not really. I actually ended getting the day off because I stayed up way too late listening to your podcast and catching up. And when I was late this morning, my boss was like, oh, you've been overworked. Just have the day off, BTO for free. So thank you very much.

Did not have done it if I hadn't fallen behind on your podcast and then caught up all in one night. Anyway, hope you're having a great day. Bye. Well, so JPC is dream. He has the cadence of like a nice engine where it's like, da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da. I really enjoy that.

It's very soothing. Yeah, and he obviously was an engine that puttered out da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da 1970 stands for Bachman Turner Overdrive, the band that sings the song, Taking Care of Business, and whose son is Tal Bachman, who's saying the song, she's so high. Keep going. So anyways, are the secret want of the hosts of the show, is that you never go to work again. Yeah.

Hey, what are the real, says, quit your jobs, don't show up. That's what we say. I do think it's really nice to listen to the show all night and then go into work and be like, I'm too sick from listening to the funny podcast. I have to go to the Norse. Are you dreaming of the Nurgers?

They say, I'm coming to the back of the boat. Oh, hey. St. Lawrence, today. What did you say? Well, Adel, anything to plug? Yes, I do. Thank you so much, Aaron. I was recently a guest on the podcast Yes and Dragini.

So please check me out on Yes and Dragini podcast, on the episode I just recently guessed it on. And also, a little bit ago, I was a guest on a podcast called Pitch, a podcast. So please also check out Pitch, a podcast. JPC, anything to plug? Yep. Today's five star review comes from Tomahawk from Pitch a Podcast.

It's titled Is Addle Mad at Me. I love the show so much that it inspired to start my own podcast last year. I asked Addle to come be a guest on my show, and he did. I know a guest on the show is a lot because he frequently plugs them on the podcast, but he didn't plug mine. So ever since January I've been wondering

if I made a mad on my podcast. Instead of asking him myself, I thought getting JPC to read out his review, this five star review would be a better course of action long live Tim Allen wrench Well, I gotta say shitty time to talk about Haka You look like a fool. You look like a complete fuck. Wow Yikes, I guess it's in turn. That's a big good strategy I do also love that I paint my I painted myself into the corner of if I guess on a podcast, I must plug it. Well, I mean, you did and this guy still got mad.

So don't get what's going on with you, Tomahawk, seems like you can take that petty shit, leave it to the professionals. And all honesty, what happened was, I used to, as soon as I guess it on shows, I would plug them on here, but then a lot of shows I guess it on were like, your episode will come out in three months. So I stopped doing it because I couldn't remember when I couldn't keep track of scheduling. So I was just like, I can't keep track of this and it's not, it's not something I want to, you know, weigh myself down with.

So I do love all the shows I guess on and I hope to plug them all, but it's tough when it's scheduled for later. I hope to plug them all like a God of luck. Just got Pokemon Pokemon like a Pokemon pervert Like anything anything that you have to plug just check out sitcom D&D if you haven't already or if you listen to it And then like it just go give it one more chance and they'll never bother you about it ever again And then check out Bill buds pop cast and also hello from the magic tavern I know that jpc and I have both been on hello from the magic tavern uh... i know that jpc i have both been on hello from the tether in recently i don't know if that's a threat

is there anything if you're at all seven other show is there anything that you would also recommend people give a second chance to because i'm a big fan of second-chance plot is what i will say as an adult if you have it had been a while give pickles another shot i think that your taste buds change over time i think you might like pickles the second time around if you don't like it in a while, give pickles another shot. I think that your taste buds change over time. I think you might like pickles the second time around. If you don't like pickles, I don't want you as a listener. Pickle on, I'll say it. Nope, okay, just! Uh-oh! Jupiter! Jay! It's too brutal!

E2 airbrodness airbutt! Bye forever! Oh, Jay's dying! Eradina! And John Patrick Cullen! Casey Tony to the editing! And Marty Perrin to the music! Vocal created by Emily Cardamus and Emily Naborin! Hey there, palens and jewels. If you like that, you're gonna love this week's Patreon.

It's another entry into our state series with Alaska. You can listen to that plus our entire Batcadilug by joining the crew crew for $5 a month or the review crew for $8 a month at patreon.com-haterittle-rittle. See you there!