Hey Riddle Riddle - #250: Semiquincentennial!

Episode Date: May 3, 2023

Happy 250 and Congratulations to Maria Menounos! Starring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Editing by:  Casey Toney Theme by:  Arne Parrott Logo by:  Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to mail us something?  Hey Riddle Riddle  6351 W Montrose Ave #267 Chicago, IL, 60634 Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531) Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fm This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/riddle and get on your way to being your best selfSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgun podcast. Aaron, what did you do a caffeine wise? I did a Celsius orange today. Not much of a Celsius gal makes me feel like my teeth have electricity in it. Sorry, what's that? I normally skip this, but these were on sale at the grocery store, and I thought, let's give these a try. You know, Aaron, what's fucked up?

Is I'm the exact same way? If there's something at the grocery store that I don't even like, but it is on sale, but you have to buy a lot of it, I'll be like, yeah, I guess I'll just buy a lot of this because it's on sale. It'll be like a chocolate dipped shrimp, and I'm like, it's $2.

Oh, I got it, do it. That actually sounds good. It was the cabin of an airplane. It was the cabin of an airplane. It's happened with an oxygen grid. And the horse made a ride. It was a ship. It was a ship.

It was a ship. It was a ship. It was a ship. I'm riding my bike! My feet before hate with the brick gun! Bumpera bop-bop-bop-bop! It's the semi-quinsent ten-year-lap episode! 250 episodes, JPC, Aaron, come on in, mind the balloons and confetti. Whoa. Oh, have some cake. Did you not have time to blow these up, or just place this confetti in a way that,

I said your carpet. Yeah, sorry, those are the cats got into this. Yeah, feel free to blow some up, they might have holes in them, have some cake, it's actually, it's actually pie. I hate it. It's all covered in cat hair. Yeah, perfect.

So, chow down. Aaron, here's some chocolate covered shrimp for you. Thank you. But he grabs some, I wanna say that's Canada dry. So, cheers to you. But you're not sure what it is. I'm not sure what it is. I left it out overnight.

So, it's definitely flat. Cheers to our, what was it called again, semi, quince and Teniel. A quarter ways to a thousand, halfway to 500. 25 cents of the way to a dollar. I just looked up what 250 years ago was from this date. It was probably, can I guess? It was the inauguration of Queen Elizabeth. And I'll say 1776, just like the musical baby. You're really close at 1773. Three years of off. So will I be right in three years or even raw girl in three years? Ooh, a 250 years ago, the tea act by reducing tax on imported British tea, this act gave British merchants an unfair advantage. Uh-oh.

That started a whole thing. Yeah, I wish I could go back in time and tell those guys T act maybe not the best idea. And we should say, it's just sort of a totally clips of circumstance. It happens. It's so funny that this worked out this way. Just so happens that on our, what's it called again, semi-quincentennial anniversary, 250 episodes, it just so happens that Maria Manudos is pregnant and she just revealed her child sex. Haven't they been trying for the better part of a decade i think so if the trailer's before movies have been in the any gauge and she's been trying not stop uh we're saying to add all

that we think his algorithm is messed up you're liking all the wrong things in your tiktok or your twitter or whatever and you're getting fed things that i will maybe you do care maybe you do care for her maybe i haven't been paying enough attention during her, what is it? Maria Menuda's newvie segment before the movie is where she just gives little like, kind of little hints at her personal life and like, yeah, I'm trying to have a baby.

It's a difficult process. So far. That's been a real roller coaster. And she's divulged too much information, too much personal information. Okay, now let's check out Ant-Man and Quattamania or whatever. And it's Paul Rodden to share with the gun to us said, can I just say no shade against Marine and Minutos? Aren't new movies just called movies? Why is that segment called movies? Why is that segment called newbies? No, wait, no.

Is new in her name? Marino, New England? Here's the thing. We'll never be able to figure this out. Marino, Moivos, Gent, Ren, Cheris. When I close my eyes and try and picture her face, I just see like a chalk outline. Like, there's no, I could not tell you any features of her.

I just know her name, which is one of the rare instances of like knowing a name and not no one's for your friends. You sure? Yeah. You know, I can't relate to this because I go to the movies all the time, but I time it as such that I don't watch any of the trailers or any of the stuff before the trailers. I get there 25 minutes after the start time of the movie and I sit down right in time for Nicole Kidman to start whisking us away to a magical movie dimension and then the movie starts.

But I don't know anything about what you're talking about because I time my life perfectly. I also, what theater does she not work for AMC because I don't feel like I ever see her thing anymore. Is she contracted, is, is newbies, is that contracted with a different theater chain? It must be like Carusodys or something? Wow, yeah. Okay, could I have a new carusodys like 50 years? Maybe they easily exist? I don't know.

Could be real. So I usually do what Aaron does where I arrive about 20 minutes late to a movie. So I don't have to watch the previews. You make a scene, make a ton of noise, make sure everyone knows you did. Don't pop cord in the air. Excuse me, I think my ear is my seat. But I can't see the tears glasses. Big ass coke bottle, coke bottle rims of the glasses, lenses with Google eyes on the outside of them. So they're just like, I can't see shit while I wear it. But I went and saw the Super Mario Brothers movie and I saw it at a friend's butt ticket

and it was sort of a regal, which I don't usually go to. And of course, I'm still gonna be late because that's my thing. But regal I think maybe has less previews or something because I was only like 15 minutes late and I came in and They were the movie had already started. I was like, oh no like oh did I like miss something important? Turns out nothing in that movie is important. You can miss whole swath of it and you'd be fine So that was if you want to miss the opening of a movie I

Highly recommend that you do that you do it for the Super Mario movie trick of a movie. I highly recommend that you do that. You do it for the Super Mario movie. Trick of the trade, and I've done that before. It's with kids. New Halloween. Yeah. I've done, made that mistake before with kids movies, trailers are shorter because they don't think kids can sit for that long.

So you get their show up like 15 minutes later. That's so, their attention, span, exactly what it is. Their attention span can be very different. And I know that because I too am it the first six minutes of the Super Mark. But I think I got the idea. Yeah, yeah, you get the gist of it. For the first two, didn't put it together.

Also at JPC and Aaron went to the movie together, but they're making it sound weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I flew back to Chicago. He made me promise I would. I was FaceTiming my nephew the morning that I went to see that movie and my nephew was also happened to be on the way to seeing that movie at the same time. And he was like, what theater are you going to? And I could hear his parents being like, he's in Chicago. We're not going to the same theater. It's too far away.

And he was like, I was like, well, I'm going to a theater that's here in Chicago. And he goes, what theater are we going to do? They're like, we're going to the one of the D&F bless. He's like, I'm going to the one in D&F bless. Probably won't see you there. I was like, yeah, we're not gonna see you in the future. JBC, you missed a chance to be a fucking hero. I mean, yes, D&F bless is probably three and a half hours away,

plus he loses an hour. But if you could have driven fast enough, you would have been an absolute hero to your nephew. I think if I could have fly, and if I could fly, then I would already be a hero to more than my nephew, right? I'm a hero at large at that point. If I may say, you're a large... We need to speaking of movies. This has become a movie podcast, like every other podcast. Speaking of movies. Wow, okay. I think subtle dig at every other podcast, speaking of movies. Wow. Okay. Subtle dig at every other podcast. I think next week, I actually figured out why you're being fed Maria Manuda's things all the time.

It's because you only listen to movie podcast. I'm being sent Maria Manudes. I would need to text JPCU and Casey Tony, audio daddy himself. Next week, I'll be texting you to you on Monday. May 1st, expect that. Because tickets go on sale for the Fast X, 40 X. And you got to be on the board. And you got to be on the board.

And you got to be on the board. And you got to be on the board. And you got to be on the board. And you got to be on the board. And you got to be on the board. keyboard and a bunch of buttons got pressed. What are you talking about? Those aren't work. Fast and the Furious 10, the one you've all been waiting for. I see, I see, I see, I see. I'm sharing a rewatch of those movies. It seems insane to me that it wasn't called Fast 10, Your Seatbelts, but Fast X is coming

out in 40X and JPCKC in myself. We're a couple of fast heads. And I'm not even a fast head as much as I'm a fast and 40X head because I don't think that I would get as much enjoyment out of that movie if I was just watching it in a quote unquote movie theater, which is bullshit.

Now most movies, I can watch Super Mario Bros. in a movie theater because I'm happy sleeping in a movie. But fast X, no, no, 40 X. Okay, we're gonna play a game. I'm so sorry. This is 100% necessary. At all, you clearly need to be, oh, go ahead. You want to finish your thought first? I just wanted to, can I get a joke in real quick? I was just gonna say, I eat is over so I can break my fast. And the furious

All right, we have to play a game. I'm so sorry. Yeah We have to play You can put all this out and then I'll say I start talking now Addle you clearly need to be on the team obviously for the people who are naming these movies so If the 10th movie was fast 10, your seatbelts, I'm gonna put three minutes on the clock here. The two of you need to come up with the titles of the Fast and Furious movies 11 through 20,

just so we can get ahead of it and they can start actually using these. Oh, I got the next one. Fast 11 diesel resurrection. Wait, hold on. What is that? Say that again. Fast 11 diesel resurrection. Wait, hold on. What is that? Say that again. Fast 11 diesel resurrection.

I hope him repeating that didn't count against our time. I have the next one. Yeah. Fast 12 days of Christmas. It's 12 days until Christmas and they have to kind of drive. They're being chased by nine Lord's Alieping, 10 swamps, all of the swimming, whatever that is. So fast 12 a day still Christmas.

Then of course we have fast 13 going on 30. By that point, the cast is going to be expand to around 30 people. It's going to be very hard to keep up with, but it'll still be good. Of course, after that, no brainer. We have fast 14 going on 31. Just kind of more the same, but the the cars the cars get a little older uh... that we have uh... that we have uh... super bowl fast xv otherwise known as fast teen past

fifteen pastime pastime receipts it's got a parody of parody of not another team movie, which is like doing a parody of a weird L song. Fast, sweet 16. Yeah, so this is where at this point the cars are sentient. I think we all agree on that. And it's one of the cars 16th birthday and they get a new car for their birthday. So this one has, hold to your seatbelts. This one has cars driving cars Yeah, so cars get inside bigger cars and they drive the cars, but there's people in the smaller cars That are driving the bigger. Does that make sense? It's like a Russian testing bill. Okay

Then of course we have a fast 17 again Which is whatever happens in that movie if that is a movie, it just happens with cars. Yes, then we have a fast 18 again, which is remake of the George Burns movie, where the car, it's an older car and it gets younger, so it's like a little baby car. And it's a different thing. A fast 19, a colon, the Quarvel Gold,

which is a steely data reference, so sorry. And then we have fast 2.0. Yes. They put the dot in the wrong spot, but it's 20, but it's 2.0, so. Yeah. How are we doing? How are we on time?

OK. I have no idea, but I'm going to read them back to you. No. Then I just show. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear it back. It's throwing up. No.

Don't run my nose at this. Yeah, I don't want it. This. I don't want to hear it back. I don't want to hear it back. It's throwing up. No. Don't rub our nose in this. Yeah, I don't want it. This is how you trade a dog. I don't want to hear it back. This is the air in the nose. 10 is fast 10 year seat belts, which you never got better than that. That one was the best one.

11 fast 11 diesel resurrection. Fast 12 days of Christmas. Fast 13 going on 30. Fast 14 going on 31 Super Bowl That some type of XV aka fast teen your seat belts Sweet 16 That was pretty good. These cars are sentient cars driving cars fast 17 again whatever happens in that movie fast 18 again

fast 19 quervo gold fast 2.0 now can I say I should have added this this onto fast 2.0 so fast 2.0 of course is fast and the furious 20 this subtitle for that is fast and the curious so the cars are in college they're 20 years old they're junior college and they're starting to experiment so they're kissing maybe same sex cars they're just they're just putting themselves out there in ways that they haven't before so that's fast fast 20, fast and the curious. And then after that, it's fast 21, and then the subtitle of that is, this is getting exhausting. And that's a fun play on exhaust.

What about fast 21 Jump Street, furious? Okay, Aaron, you're hired. You're one of the jobs and you nailed the interview. That's the best one. And I say goodbye that. Would it be fun if you if you were like a professional baseball hitting coach? Sure. Could your company be called swing and a miss? Am I? Am I? Am I? Yeah, you can be this. And I make all my employees call me the mess and by the employees. I mean baseball players Okay, this is a riddle podcast

Oh, yes, and I am old maned puzzies and we're about 18 minutes in to this semi-guincentennial episode so we should get to some of this stuff I think about baseball players as employees because they have to go to practice. Imagine being like, yeah, I got to practice for my job. They're like, what? On a Sunday, you have to go to practice for your job, but yeah.

Yeah, it's insane that they're sitting in a dugout chewing tobacco, needing sunflower seeds and they're like a little kid yells at them and they're like, hey, buddy, I'm at work. That's what do you do for work? Run. I'm wearing a hard hey buddy, I'm at work. That's what do you do for work? Run. I wear a hard hat. I'm obviously at work.

Only one of you is wearing a hard hat at a time. Shut up. And we're making baseball being work when we're three professional podcasters, professional, of course, written, what I do is physically strenuous. Written in blood. Yeah. Okay, here's our first riddle. What word when red from left to

right is a ruler, but when red from right to left is a servant. This is a bad riddle. King and Gdit. Made and the And the um... Carpe diem. Queen. Sees the maid. Nickoo. Liu. Can you read it again? What word read from left to right is a ruler, but when read from right to left is a servant.

And ruler and servant, I don't know if these are the best choices of words, but I guess... Well, can we choose better ones? Then just give me a better one. Uh, what word when read from left to right is worshiped when read from right to left is, uh, house trained. Dating, you see it. A dog, God and dog. God and dog.

And I do want to see a scene wait wait god is a ruler yeah no way to that song what's who sings that Jonas born is that Jonas which does Jonas born to sing a song called god and a bus and he was walking oh what if that's what if God was one of us. Does he? Does she say he's a ruler in that? I don't know, probably. That's John Osborne, right? I think so.

Can I tell you the wildest concert I ever, and then I want to see you soon. Yeah. Wildest concert I ever want to was the grateful dead. This is post Jerry Garcia. And Bob Dylan was their lead singer for the night, but then halfway through they swapped out Bob Dylan for Joe Nosworth. Wow.

And it was the biggest shit show I've ever seen. Bob Dylan, you could not understand a single word he said. I know that's the joke most people make, but I think on this, I've seen him later and I could hear, I could understand his words. He was clearly on medication or something was going up, but it's terrible concept. Do you think that Bob Dylan got a phone call? That was like, do you want to be for one night only the singer for Grateful Dead?

And do you think Bob Dylan said, absolutely, I'll take that gig. Pretty sure that the Grateful Dead don't have lyrics to their songs. But you're like, I think it's just guitars and stuff. Got there and they were like, okay, so like, you know, box of rain, right? He's like, what do you mean I know box of rain?

Like you guys should know. Behind him. Here's what I'll say, JPC is box of rain a real song because it could go either way. Yeah, that's okay. That's okay. It's one of the big ones. Let's try this one. You know truckin, right?

Please tell me you know truckin. And he's like, yeah, I mean, yeah, I know that it is a grateful that song. I don't know what you want for me, Bob Dylan. Shrek. I do want to, based on the answer being God and Dog, I do want to see a scene. Aaron, you are a,

Pomeranian, whatever, whatever Dog floats your boat. You have unfortunately passed away. You are, you have just made your way into heaven and you are meeting dog god played by gps Doo doo doo doo. Oh, hey, I'll be with you in just a moment. I'm finishing up a doodle Take your time. I Can tell you're thinking though is he he he like drawing something on a paper? No. I'm making a plan for a new creature. It's a new type of...

Oh, can I help? Um, let's look at you. Pomeranian... Uh-huh? Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope Excuse me, Angel? Yes. Would you please get this off to whoever takes care of these things and make sure a lot of these are ridin' around? Okay, rolls up, puts in a pneumatic tube presses button. What's the name of your new animal? Oh, uh, that is a crab-bredeutal. Oh, okay.

Yeah, half crab, half... Lab-bredeutal. Well, I had the best life with the best family, super fun. You are bagels, correct? Mm-hmm. They're very same. You're bagels. Okay.

Wow, yeah, it looks like you did have a really nice life. I'm kinda going over some of your statistics here. You're a very good dog. Mm-hmm. House broken almost immediately. Really no accidents. Well, couple accidents, but that's to be expected. You hid them well, they never found them.

Oh, that's awesome. So yeah. That's great. Yeah, that is great. Okay, well, bagels, I have really good news. Okay. You may have heard from your time, I heard that all dogs go to heaven.

Yes. Yes, I heard that all over and over and over again. Not technically true. That was our policy for, I want to say like 15,000 years and then we just got two full of dogs. So we had to start being a little more exclusive. This is not that news for you because like I said, you look very good on paper.

Uh huh. It comes with a little bit of an ethical dilemma. What? I can let you in but I have to kick one of these. Yeah I have to kick one of the dogs who was worse statistically than you you know from a long time ago and they've been in here for a long time. Is this dog this dog died three thousand years ago. Oh, sorry. Yeah, he gets to play this case My name is Crem Brouley and I Let several thousand humans out of a castle while it was burning. I saved so many lives But I once I'm just gonna

Heaven, thank you so nice meeting you come Yeah, and I kick him I kick up when they go That's it that's something that God likes to do I kick him when they go All right, if you had to create an animal yes crap a doodle Think before you because if this if this podcast ever gets struck by lightning these animals will exist. Yeah, okay, okay What would you create? If we had to create it so hold on what's the question if we had to create a new animal? What would we create it doesn't have to be a mashup of two

Existing animals. Well, it should be like do we have to say should we have to we would we have to say like Dolphinch and this is like a Do we have to say, should we have to, we would we have to say like dolphin, and this is like a tiny fly dolphin, or is this, or is this like a whole cloth we're designing a new animal? We should do, which one do you want to watch? We should do one of them. I'm gonna go first with the mashup,

and I think there's nothing else will come to mind. It's, there's a clear winner, and I can't even think of anything else, which is a snig. Now a snig is long and thin like a snake, but it's of course a pig. So it has a little snout, has the cute little ears. I guess it's whole body is like the curly little tail part.

Oh, yeah. And it just kind of, it almost, it almost like springs around. So it's like, it's a big box spring. I thought so. And this is no surprise. This is just something that I've been kind of tinkering with on my own for a long time.

I'm going to go with the chimpanzee bra Which is of course zebra body and head chimpanzee arms legs tail and butt. Oh And JVC we never got invited to your island You said you were conducting experiments. The fucking tax man. Fucking tax man came and took it You just you you never pay taxes one time Fucking tax man. Fucking tax man came and took it. You just, you never pay taxes one time. They will take your little sciat island, Aaron.

What's your animal? I think I'm gonna do a flying fox. It's like a flying fish. So it's a sea creature, but it's a fox and it can jump out of the water. I like that. That's nice. It's a normal animal.

And my new animal is like, the Lord bin, I'll go ahead and add it. Oh no, I gotta hear about Gorbin. I want it. is like, the normal. I'll go ahead and add. Oh, no, I want to hear about Gorban. I want to go ahead. Okay. No, no, go. Well, mine, Aaron, you want to hear this.

Mine's called a Sharon. And it's Aaron Keefe, but with Shark Eyes. Uh, that's where the SH comes into play. So me went up on over. But you always stop. Sorry, I'm likeover. But you always stop. Sorry, I'm like a shark. You always stop moving.

If you move, you'll start moving. Yeah, that's great. If you move, you die. Yeah, exactly. And we need a picture of Aaron with a shark fin that says, if I move, I'll die. So my animal is called a tockies. And it's the chip tockies except it is an animal now. So that's no longer a snack that doesn't come from something.

That's your eating. It's not vegan anymore. I don't know if tockies were ever vegan, but definitely now it's like it's like eating pork rinds, your eating creatures. Hi tockies, Aaron, what's yours? Mine is a glorbin and it's a glowing orb that can't talk or make noise, but it can roll its eyes. So it just sort of glows, or if you have a Glorbin as a pet, it will just sort of float

around your party and roll its eyes at people. Quick question. So it's a glowing orb, but the orb has eyes or it's like two glowing orbs that look like eyes like together. It's a glowing orb that has eyes. Guy, if you wanna see, this'll just be like a 30 to 45 second. This is like an early 90s toy ad that you might see on TV.

And Aaron, you're gonna be the sort of narrator. JBC and I will be in it. And this is an ad for Glorbans. We're trying to push it on kids in the 90s. Hey kids, put down your sugary cereal for a second. And let me tell you about something called a Glorbin. My mouth's so cut up. I was so hungry.

What is a Glorbin? Well, it's something that you're going to beg your parents to buy for you. Tooth and nail, you're going to beg them. It's a floating orb that will have your back in all social situations. I want to go home. Wait, it has my teeth and nails or it's gonna take them? What's happening? No, the Glorbin doesn't take anything from you. It floats behind you and it cuts your bullies down to size. I can't see it. Is it behind me right now? Is there one in the house? Okay, cut. I know I said I wanted to use my kids for this commercial, but I actually need some more professional kids in here. They are going off script.

Kid, it's not. I didn't receive a script. Am I getting scale? The Glorbin wanted my mom. She only wanted to use this because we're not union. Shut up. No. See. Like any good at it, it ends with telling a kid to shut up. Let's do one more riddle before we go to break here.

So far, our scene's still ended with God kicking a dog into hell and someone telling a kid to shut up. So this is just a very fun, accessible podcast for everyone to enjoy. Something anyone can enjoy. I have feet but no waste. I have back but no stomach. What am I? I have feet but no waste. I have back but no stomach. What am I? Okay, so something that has feet, that could be like a measure of distance, right? They could just be tall, right? It could be something tall that has a back to it. So I will say a basketball hoop.

Okay, interesting, that is incorrect, but I'll give you a ruler, like a measuring. I have feet but no waist, I have back but no stomach. And I'll say in this instance, I know sometimes they're very tricky in this instance. It is not I won't I wouldn't say literal feet, but it is feet Not the measurement, but the the stabilizing devices So it's piece furniture mm-hmm I have feet but no waste. I have back you the air nailed it Wow, I was so close with basketball

hoop. Although in my defense, when I was a kid growing up poor in Indiana, what we would do is we would just cut the bottom of a chair, hang it up on top of the house, and we would use that as a basketball hoop. Just like James Neymeth intended. Amen. And I know who that is. Famous Canadian who invented basketball. And I know who that is. James Neymeth intended. Amen. And I know who that is. Famous Canadian who invented basketball. And I know who that is. James Neymeth, maybe it's Neymeth. Aaron, go ahead. Uh, uh, Adel, you are a chair.

JPC, you are a table and you are talking to each other. Just scooch, scooch, scooch, scooch, scooch. Sorry, I'm, I'm so close. How's it going today? Oh, um, you know, another day, another... Well, I was gonna say dollar, but, uh... You know, obviously not, right? Yeah, we've just heard the word said, but I don't know what that is.

Uh, I see, ugh. I saw last night and I didn't want to wake you up, but I see that someone, that someone put a drink on you with no coaster and I think you have another stain. Yeah, yeah, well, you know, the first one is devastating, but by the time you get to my old age, you know, house with kids and stuff like that, it's pretty much par for the course.

Maybe I hope that one day someone like refinishes me. Yeah. God, I would love to be refinished, you know what I'm saying? Hey Mark, what do you think par for the courses? I know you and I say it all the time, just like we say dollar, but what do we think that is? You know, I don't know. There are so many things in this life

that scare and confuse me. So many things, yeah. And scare and confuse so many things. And I just kind of take them in and I kind of spit them out again because if I spit one second really pondering the fact that I'm sentient I can feel things. Yeah. And I am a table. Yes. I think my world would just kind of implode.

So I don't say I'm easy breezy. Thank you. They put the cups on me. Who knows why I am, but I am. Hey Mark. Yeah. What do we think easy breezy is? Do you ever try to talk to the people? I know they can't hear us.

I know they can't hear us, but you ever try to talk to them. Well, here's what sucks about me. One of the things is that anytime a human is nearby, they're usually, they're asses on my face. So I, my voice is muffled. I can creak, but that's about it. Have you ever tried to talk to them? Occasionally.

Occasionally, I'll try to talk. I'll just try to say, you know, something how I'm feeling, share a thought. Yeah. I know that I'm speaking the language, they speaking, because I can hear them and understand them. Sure. If the thing about it is being a table, hmm...

I don't necessarily know where the mouth is. Yeah. Well, I can't explain how we're talking, yep. Here comes Claire, here comes Claire. Okay, well, where's she gonna sit though? Do you think she's gonna... Oh, oh, oh. Oh, she sat on you, yeah. I gotta get a new table.

This looks like shit. Honey, we gotta get a new table this weekend. No, don't call Dennis. Don't call Dennis. Yeah, you can break this one down and sort of just throw it in the trash. Eh, bye. Okay, maybe I'll take it out back and be in the boys, or I'll have some backyard wrestling. I'll throw Tom through this thing.

I want a divorce. Oh, yeah. Oh, see. He'll throw me through the boys, I'll have some backyard wrestling. I'll throw Tom through this thing. I want a divorce. Oh yeah, oh, see. He'll throw me through the table, man. I'll speak to him, divorce. This is our last episode, we'll be right back. Ha ha ha. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, how I love, he looks sleep, I love that he looks mattress brand, best nights sleep of my life. I know not everyone is on board yet, so I secured a word-winning sleeper, Merrill Sleep. She's right behind that door, Merrill Sleep.

Wow, she won the Golden Pillow for best sleep. That's right behind that door. Merrill sleep. Wow, she won the golden pillow for best sleep. That's right. Hey Merrill Very well rested after sleeping on my midnight lux helix mattress. Good to see you. Good to see you. Your naps are stunning I just wanted you to tell people about helix sleep how, how the Heelix lineup offers 20 unique mattresses, including the award-winning Luxe collection. The newly released Heelix Elite collection, a mattress design for big and tall sleepers, even a mattress made just for kids. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Yeah, and Heelix knows there's no better way to test out a new mattress than by sleeping on it in your own home. That's why they offer a 100 night trial in a 10 to 15 year warranty to try out the new Helix mattress. Who do you? Who? Who did I think you were? I don't know. I'm Meryl sleep and I know everybody is unique and everybody sleeps differently. I just recommend taking the Helix sleep quiz and you can figure out what mattress is right

cheap for you. I don't know if you're a side sleeper or you sleep hot or cold or if you sleep like me. Meryl sleep. Yeah, choosing the right mattress is a real Sophie's decision, but don't just take our word for it or Meryl sleeps word for it. Helix has been awarded the number one mattress picked by GQ and Wired Magazine. It was even recommended by multiple leading chiropractors and doctors of sleep medicine. I don't think I thought you were the person that you were.

Oh, she's doing it. Who are? What a performance. Helix mattresses all come with a 10 to 15 year warranty depending on the model. Oh, stunning. Yeah, look, Helix is offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helix sleep dot com slash riddle. This is their best offer yet, and it will not last long with helix better sleep starts now. Go ahead and give her the Academy a snore.

The snore. Academy of snore. You know what? You mean the Academy is not good close to falling asleep. That's why Yeah, I got that a lot Hey, I don't hate air. I got a bone to pick with the two of you Sure, yeah, I wore the skeleton outfit just cuz I figured this was coming happy Halloween a few months early It's not yet. What is it? So you know how the two of you, I was like, guys, I am always so hungry for lunches and dinners in the like and you, jokers, told me, oh, JPC, it's okay. All you have to do is take some, you know,

American paper currency, tape it to your front door, close the door, and then wait until someone brings you food. Well, I kept opening the door and the money was gone. So I had to take more money to my door. I think you're thinking to work out all. Oh, door cash. Door cash. Yeah, you did door cash.

We told you door dash is the number one thing to you. What the hunk? With door dash, you'll enjoy next level convenience with delivery in the hour, making it easier than ever to get whatever you want delivered to your house, whether that be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I eat back to school supplies. But what?

JPC, all your favorite retail, grocery and convenience stores are on the app so you can chop everything, your kids, your dogs, your family, might need for back to school. And hey, personally, just yesterday, I bought some marshes homemade premium quality buck eyes, you know, those candies that are chocolate stuffed with peanut butter. I just got those from DoorDash and they were, they were on my porch within 20 minutes. And it's very, very dangerous because they're delicious. Did you fill your belly and your pantry? Uh, yes. Did you fill your belly and your pantry?

Yes. Did you fill your backpack? I did. Okay, well then DoorDash has come again for the gold. I remember distinctively the stress of going back to school and going from store to store to get all my favorite snacks and pencils and pencil cases and all the things that I needed me and my siblings and I remember how stressed my mom was.

And I know that she would have loved to have DoorDash. So she could be prepared before the big back-to-school day arrived. So you can stock up with go-to breakfast, lunchbox staples, and brands that you love. Don't eat my school supplies, JPC. JPC, put that eraser down. Never school.

Put that trapper keeper down. Your mouth is too small. Never been told that before. Shop DoorDash to get everything you need for the back to school season delivered right to your door. Order now for stress free back to school shopping use promo code riddle to get 50% off up to $10 value. When you spend $15 or more at convenience grocery or retail stores on door dash, that's 50% off up to a $10 value. When you spend $15 or more, promo code riddle, don't forget JPC because you keep eating those

school supplies. That's code riddle for 50% off your next order, term supply. At all, JPC keeps eating my gel pens. Thanks, DoorCash. I mean, no, that's the one. That one didn't work. That one's bad.

Hey, JPC. Uh, yeah. You're not in trouble. That one's bad. Hey, GPC. Yeah. You're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm pranking at all and I'm setting up a website to bring him. I just need some advice. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. I'm not I'm not mad at you. We're pranking. I have. Spare spaces to all one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and to see it online. Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website. It gages with your audience. It's not anything for products to cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms.

Hey, Addle. Come here. Come here. Come here. Hey, what's going on? I actually, I want to prank JPC and I want to set up a whole website to prank him. Do you have anything that like, is there like an online store that could set up on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace?

You can have custom merch. You can easily sell custom merch and create passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production and inventory and shipping are handled for you saving you time and money What is happening okay? Wait, what's going on with that all? Oh nothing nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal square space website not a prank thing

No, he's gonna shoot you and I'm use analytics, use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool. I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my prank website, the prank site. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for? I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. It was four, I can't remember what's the website is for. Frank. With Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party Tools to extend the functionality of

your website. Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, Madel? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine. Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off

your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back, she's back. Hey Aaron. Hey, Aaron. Can we go to grandma's house? Wait, I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. Hahaha.

Hahaha. You know, I was just thinking that there's something about the fact that We are recording this one for the last episode that we recorded Has come out. So we have no way of knowing if people are still going to be listening to the podcast anymore. We may have just done the first half of the show to know what.

Wow. That's exciting. I don't know how this rumor got started, but this is not our last episode. Sorry, I should clarify. That's not our last episode. Like you started it like 30 seconds ago. It's, we'll never know. It's's hard to tell but while we were on break

I saw a lot of tweets. I got a lot of emails a lot of people texting me friends and family concerned This is not our last episode. I don't know how that got started. Please do not spread that rumor We're continuing to go we hope to make it and I heard an instantaneous parade go by my house I'm like that's a little offensive Huh Aaron that's interesting that it sounds something like this. Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh. Did he get what prepared?

No, I don't think so. Yeah. It's not an opportunity and he took it. I think a lot of the few times we've done animal parade on the show. We've done the theme song and then Adam's been like, all right, what next? I'm like, the whole segment, we thought that was what

the segment was when it first came out, but the whole segment is the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article.

It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article.

It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal article. It's the Animal'll do. This is something special. Okay, special. We have an email here. I rarely look through the emails or pull puzzles from the emails or riddles from the emails because I have so many gosh darn riddle books. So here's, this is an email from Thomas J. Brown. Thank you Thomas J. Brown for sending us an email. Says, hey gang, a while back, I came up with a series of puzzles that make use of homophones. I've included some of the better ones in this email. The answer to each clue will be three syllables.

I don't know if that's right, but we'll see. All of which sound the same. It will make more sense when she starts doing them. One more hint. The puzzle clues and answers are in the same order. Here's an example. So the example that Thomas gave was Horace, New York, Bison. Horace, New York, Bison?

Yes, this is the example round. I've never heard... It's so it's all homophones, but I've never heard this used for a term for Horace. But I have to take Thomas's word. So the answer to that in a guesses? No, I think I need an example on of these to understand.

Sure. So harass New York Bison would be Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo. Oh, yes, of course. Okay. I see. I thought it was talking about New York City. I see it. Hmm. Wait, wait, wait. What, what, what, what, what's the New York connection to? Oh, oh, New York. The, the, the, the, the, the, the, so the answer is three homophones. We're not looking for homophones of each word.

Correct. These are clues that are all gonna land us to a word that is a homophone. Yes. Yep. Wait, and he says, that are all gonna land us to a word that is a homophone. Yes. Yep. Wait, and he says, so is Buffalo a homophone? What am I not getting here?

So, homophone, as far as I know, homophone is like, it sounds the same, but it's spelled differently. And then, homonym, I believe someone's gonna come at me, is said the same, but this and spelled the same. Is that right? Hama phone is each of two or more words having the same pronunciation but different meanings. So not different meanings.

Okay, yeah. Yeah. Okay, so I'm thinking of a common name. Or did door spelling, yeah. Common name is like there, there, there. That's hominim. Yeah. Well, that's what you say to someone who just lost a pet.

Yeah. If they lost a hominim. That's a nice extra there and there. That's hominim. Yeah. Well, that's what you say to someone who just lost a pet. Yeah. If they lost a hominim, but that's a extra there in there. There. They're just got kicked to hell. Oh, my God. Yeah. Okay. Okay. He says that each clue will be three syllables. I guess that I don't know if that's going to be right. So disregard that. Here, let's go. Let's start off and see if we can get into these. Sure. We got this. A bedtime expression said to a medieval soldier. Night night night night night night nailed it. Night night night night night night night night night night. I like to see a scene. JPC, you are talking a night in KNI Ght. It's just the same word. It's not a homophone Night night one word what's going on? Never mind. You're talking a KNI Ght in for bed and you're reading a mystery and you're soothing in before falsely

Good sir Winchester. It's It's time for your bedding. Hey, I'm well-matched. I do not yet want to go to slumber! No, no, no, it is the eve of slumber and it slumber is upon thine very eyes. Take off your mail, your leather... ...jurgen, I think it is a jurgen. Yes. Yes, of course. let me take off my What is this?

wig called it's a mercen... let me take off my mercen... You're letting the most powerful wizard in all the land. Can I ask you something? Good so ninety-night. How did you come by the name? ninety-night Well when when and Nighty-night. Well, when... when... and... ...Fu... Lord, have mercy one day, maybe this will apply to you, but when you are too old for your nightly duties...

Oh, let me pull up my leather blanket close to my neck. Yes, and let me put another one on it, and now it's a leather doublet. Uh-huh. When you are too old for your nightly duties, the king has other uses for you. So some knights become elder statesmen if they are wise and full of wit. And some knights, if I were correctly so knight, some knights go to the great village upstate. I heard there's a beautiful village where the knights run free. They graze and they fight and kill dragons in their old age. Is that right?

Yeah, sure. Let's just say yes. That's true. And then some knights have what we like to call a gambling addiction. And they maybe aren't supposed to talk to the Dignity Terries and they're not really good at court. And so I did notice so nighty night that anytime I put on a single layer you tend to Dublet you know Um any time I put down money you say hey you want a doublet? Why don't we split? Why don't we split? Hey? No, I don't Why don't you a simple bet? You fall asleep before midnight and if that's true

You owe me four horses and then I don't horses yeah come on a or you just lend me the four horses now and I can double those horses in two years well how about instead of four horses it's four sets of corsets then that's fun yeah that's fun I'm still a dead man I'm still a fucking dead man if I have four dresses or whatever You know what why don't you just go to sleep? Okay? Well, I'll pick a story. I'll read you the story You'll go to sleep. Yes deep slumber so nighty night I'll take a look at the room. Is it true into your chest? Hey, see if there's anything in that what I'm sorry, huh? You're not asleep get out of my shirt

Don't get in my chest. Okay. Is it true, so 99th that you're gambling once got so bad that you had a hedge night called your bets? Hedge, yes. Yes, yes, yes I had a hedge night called your bets. Uh huh, yes that is absolutely true. Unfortunately I definitely shorted on my hedge bet and

Yes, and by that I mean he lost his head. Oh, no executed for sure Yeah, and a lot of my investments were tied up at his kind of whole thing and the King kind of just split off his lands and titles and Yeah, but that was another another life a completely other life Yes, yes, yes, yes, okay, so why don't we do this? You go to bed right now. When you wake up in the morning, if anyone asks, I died. I became a ghost. I went off to that farm that you were talking about, huh?

Were all those good nights go? Yeah. And you never talk about me again. And all I need is like 1200 gold coins, man. It's 100 gold coins. You could spare it. Look at all, look at this. You have two doublets. Well, that's, yeah, okay. Okay gold coins. Good spirit. Look at all. Look at this. You have two double-its.

Well, that's, yeah, okay. Well, okay, fine. Here, let me go into my chest here, push aside my ribs and here. Oh, here you go. Oh, I'm so gross. Oh, no wonder I couldn't find your money. Oh, it's inside.

I've seen. Oh. Push aside my ribs. That's my favorite play. The play that you guys guys just did that is my favorite play of all time Hmm Shakespeare. I got whisked away in that scene Incredible that's funny because Aaron if I'm not mistaken your fucking cell phone went off in the middle of it I took a call Uh-huh and then during intermission we sold no merch so

Uh-huh, and then during intermission we sold no merch. So. That's huge, real loud. I opened a bunch of loud rustling bags and I booed and I cheered and I sang along. And you see no, um, Adel was played by an understudy, so no refunds. Here's the next one. A specific breed of dogs food. A specific breed of dogs food. This is a tough one. I would also say. Pacific breed of dogs food a specific breed of dogs food

This is a tough one I would also say I would also say This word is also associated I think in the Midwest mostly with puppy And it's also a southern is it is it almost like a southern kimchi. What was it? I'm it's not I'm Puppy Chao. You got the second part right? A specific breed of dogs food. Chao Chao. Chao Chao.

Chao Chao Chao. Okay, a striped insect. Okay, that makes sense. A striped insect's air gun ammunition. That's a tongue twister. A striped insect's air gun ammunition. That's a tongue twister. Striped insects, air gun ammunition. BBB. That's correct. Yes. Yes. I'm mad at him yet. Oh yeah. BBB. I'm older brothers could. They would try to shoot bees out of their BB guns at their siblings if they could.

Yeah. That's true. That's fucking cool. That's what guns should shoot. A cold South American meat and bean dish. A cold South American meat and bean dish. And this dish doesn't have to have meat, but disregarding Texas, it definitely has to have beans. A South American bean dish

So, oh, uh, is it just chili chili? Yeah, one more Chili chili. I'll come from chili. So it's cold It's South American and it's a meat and bean dish. So that makes a chili chili chili It it's saying it Saying it is chili do people produce chili? Chili for this they do It's saying it is chilly. Do people pronounce Chile? Chilli? For this they do. Hahaha. I don't know the name.

I'm trying to think now that I'm hearing it, I'm like, is that how some people say it? But it seems deeply wrong to me. Chile. Chile. Chile. Chile. You know the country, Chile.

I mean, that's how the Americans pronounce it. Chile. Chile, Chile, Chile. You know, the country, Chile. I mean, that's not what Americans pronounce it. Chile. How do you think those Americans pronounce the most famous of the cities in Scotland? What's that? Do you think most of the Americans say Edinburgh? Yeah. Okay. I don't.

What do you think they say? Edinburgh. I don't know that I've never talked to a bunch of Americans about Edinburgh. Yeah, okay. I don't what what do you think is a Edinburgh? I don't know that I've ever talked to a bunch of Americans about Edinburgh. Outside of like the fridge faster whenever. Sean and I were talking about Pepsi and then we really truly heard the word Pepsi for the first time and we were like what's a Pepsi? Yeah. Pepsi? Is that the weirdest word? I have friends that are moving to Arkansas. And when I remember with the first time I saw Arkansas wrote it now, and I was like, oh, because we have Kansas.

And Kansas is pronounced Kansas. And Arkansas should just be Arkansas. That's what it looks like. Yeah. And yet it's Arkansas. That's what it looks like. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, and it's Arkansas. It's like, what? That's like saying if New Mexico was pronounced like Neh, we're missing co.

Yeah. We're like, no, it's pretty sure it's New Mexico. It's Mexico and you may have to go here. No, I guess Arkansas doesn't have a space between the AR and the Kansas. Aaron, I'm glad you asked earlier. Pepsi got its name from Pepsi in the digestive enzyme. So that's an ingredient that's in some sodas.

It's a digestive enzyme. I assume that's the ingredient that takes the shine off of pennies when you dump them in a vat with Pepsi. So that's kind of fun. Pepsi, like, do you want a Pepsi? I'm truly just blacked into that word for the first time ever, Pepsi. Pepsi.

It sounds a little too much like Pepsi for me. And I'm like, oh no, I definitely know what that. I know that I should not what that. I don't know exactly what it does, but I don't, I know I don't want it. And then Sean and I, go ahead. Go ahead. And Sean and I were doing a bit,

because you know how waiters have to go, is Pepsi okay? Yes. We were doing a bit of a waiter didn't know how to say that right, and they're asking as if Pepsi was like a woman that was like sick in the bathroom. Is Pepsi okay? So if you're a waiter or a waitress, please start saying it like that. Is Pepsi okay? So if you're a waiter or a waitress, please start saying it like that.

It's Pepsi okay. And if you're Maria, if you're Maria Manudos and surprise the price, she's having a girl, please name your daughter Pepsi. Yes. Pepsi is a beautiful name for a daughter. Beautiful name. We have a few more and these are, Thomas says these are the trickier ones. So we have three tricky ones.

Here we go. are the trickier ones. So we have three trickier ones. Here we go. Thomas the trick engine. The man will mend the back of your foot. The man will mend the back of your foot. Okay, what is the back of your foot called? That's gotta be. Heal. Heal, heal your heel.

Heal, heel. Short for heel, heel, heel, HEAL, HEAL, HEAL, HEAL, HEAL. Heal, heel. He'll heal and short for he will heal heal H.E.L He'll H E.E.L He'll heal heal which is also something you say to your dog Tumor the female deers uncooked loaves take a nap the female deers uncooked loaves take a nap Yeah Do Yeah, do Do do do in terms of a sleeper now. Doze, doze, doze, chilly, chilly, chilly.

Very nice. Doze, doze, doze. Doze, doze, doze. Last one, an out of season corn puzzle. An out of season. Maze, maze, maze, maze. It's maze, M-A-Y, apostrophe S, maze, M-A-I-Z-E, and maze, M-A-Z-E.

That is, I've always wondered why they didn't call corn maces, maze maces. Hopefully you enjoyed these. And if you did, I can send more. Thomas, please send more. I love the show and support you on Patreon. Thank you so much, Thomas. And this Thomas from Spokane.

Wow. Sounds like we got another one of these Thomas riddles on our heads. Spokane, Spokane, Spokane. Actually,dles on our heads. Spocky and Spock Interesting. I do want to see a scene. Adel, you're going to be playing the most famous person from Spokane, Washington. You're going to be a certain Michael Spokane. I assume it would be like the lead singer, Monis Mouse or something. I assume. No, you're your certain Michael Spokane and Aaron, you are going to be doing an interview for like a magazine cover about be doing an interview for like a magazine cover about Sir Michael Spooking. Hi, thank you so much for meeting with me. A smart pleasure and can I just say you're beautiful.

If I can still say that these days, okay. Tip of the hat, wink of the eye, glint of the teeth. I'm grabbing my coat, putting my coat on. My colleague is going to come in and take over for me. He'll be there. Oh, you have a dog. A dog's going to talk to me. over for me. He'll be there. Oh, you have a dog. A dog's going to talk to me. No, so nice getting away from you.

Okay, here he comes. I can't actually go in there because I have a restraining order against Michael's cocaine. Okay, we'll do it through the window. That's how it's a distance. It's not about the material. Oh, can I just say, I once did it through the window. It was back in the seven days and the white album would just come out. He's from about the material. Oh, can I just say, I once did it through the window. It was back in the seven days, and the white album would just come out.

He's from a different time. I know. But I was listening to Abbey Road, and so we did it through a bathroom window, and it was just really beautiful. Why do you have a restraining order against him? It was a huge misunderstanding. I lent him $500, but he thought it was just like a $500 gift.

He's creeping up on us. Sorry, I overheard you soar to loom. Soar to be looming. Can I just clarify? You let me $500, and then I gave up for lent in elones. So that's why I didn't repay you to get closer to God, isn't it? Please do this interview with him. You owe me. I honestly, the magazine only sent me because if you leave the interview, they, all that I'm opening up this envelope, they sent me with a gun.

I'm supposed to stop you if you try to leave the interview. No, no, no. You owe me, Carl, you owe me. I was in the forest of Washington the other day. Who picks up your kids from school every day? I don't know. If I knew, I wouldn't be getting blackmailed. Seeing. Sir Michael Spokane. We love Sir Michael Spokane. We love Spokane. He's been a different era. But it is Spokane,

as we all know. Thank you so much Thomas. Oh, Thomas, we should also say, is from the almost plausible podcast. Oh, cool. Thomas. We should say that, or we have to. Is he making us say that? We have, Thomas is in my room right now. Uh oh.

Uh oh. You can't say implausible podcast. Well, let's do, let's do one more riddle, and then we'll come to a close of this. I would say semi-ginseniera. 250 episodes, nothing this needs at. I remember my phrase, I'm sorry. It's my seventh birthday.

Let's do one more riddle here. Let me find the good one. Okay, okay, okay. So, Adel, I mean, I was gonna say, so JPC, what's up with you? Well, Adel, look for the riddle, but Adel, what's up with you? Just looking for riddles.

There's Adel. Why do you look for the riddles? Can you Google what the Chinese Ode zodiac year is for this year? Just wait, where are you looking for rentals? Well, I'll just, I'll just, I'll just, I want to know as well. Um, for, for 2023, you know what? No, let's do 206. Okay, I just, because I have planning to do.

Okay, Chinese zodiac, uh, that would be the fire horse. Um, you have the fire horse. That's what it says. You got to be making that horse. You have the fire horse? That's what it says. You gotta be making that up, huh? I have not. I do want to see a scene. Instead of a riddle, we're gonna see one more scene. JPC, you are a, your Paul Revere,

and I'm panicking, your Paul Revere and Aaron, and Paul Re Paul Revere and Aaron and Paul Revere is running out to his barn to go tell it on the road that the British are coming famously at night Aaron you are Paul Revere's horse but you are on fire yes quick off to providence you and and I'll go to Boston to deliver my missive in the night. Oh, yeah, sorry. No can do boss. I think I might have gotten an STD. I am on fire right now. What is going on? Huxley, you are positively a light. Yeah. I've been having a lot of fun lately boss. It's my own fault I haven't been safe.

Um, I know about safe sex. I just have a practicing it. Huxley, Huxley. Sorry. Why buy the horse condoms if you're not going to use the horse condoms? You think they're cheap? You think they're cheap? First of all, I do do that.

When I go to the bar, when I go down to Sam Adams Brewery, I do let a horse condom fall out of walrus. I know. I know. I dropped this Rivia, I here's a thing. I hope this isn't important because I am not riding tonight I'm gonna take a long bath. I'm gonna reflect Sorry, I hope I'm not too late. I am But a courier the pony express I have a message here for one Huxley is there a Huxley here? Huxley's my horse. Oh this is my horse a missus. This is from another horse named Claire Voyance. The message reads, Dear Huxley, stop. I'm

alerting all my former partners. Stop. There it is. I'm just being diagnosed with Pepsi. Stop. Yep. Take care of yourself. Stop. Right. Mm-hmm. There it is. Look, Slee, you have Pepsi? Yeah. I rode you bareback like two days ago, man. I know, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry. What the hell? This is the biggest thing happening in Boston tonight. I'm sorry.

My shit's gonna look like Ben Franklin up in this shit. Famously syphiletic. Famously, famously. Just fucking fantastic. Way to knock fire horse out of the ballpark, which is a phrase. And that was a panic scene from you. A panic scene.

So imagine if I had my brothers. Let's go ahead, Casey. Can we go ahead and hear a voicemail? But before we do, I think we have a brand new theme. Nope. Nope. Casey, can we go ahead and hear a voicemail? But before we do, I think we have a brand new theme. Nope. Nope. Casey, can we go ahead and see you? Speaking of that, if you have a theme you want to write for our show, please email HRPodcast

at gmail.com. And we could potentially play your voicemail theme right here on the show. So if you're a talented musician or you got a little song in your heart, email us there. Yeah, what Adam meant is that we would love to have a brand new theme. So we're just waiting on you to send us a brand new theme and then we'll have one. And it'll be done in, by the way,

it'll definitely be played on the show. Yeah, and can I just say it sucks that I had to set up the voicemail while I was searching for a final riddle. So that's why I missed the- That's why. And if you wanna leave us a voicemail, please do so at 1-805-Riddle1, that's 1-805-Riddle1. Casey, play that voicemail. Hey guys, first time long time, my wife and I are having a baby in March, and it's a baby

boy and we're really struggling to come up with names, and I feel like you are uniquely qualified for to come up with boy names, you know, KPC, you name yourself, Adel I'm really interested in what you, what it felt like growing up, like an uncommon or really culturally specific name. And Aaron, if you dated like 10, should he do the EO, you know, that's information. So I appreciate any help.

I love you guys, bye forever. We love you. And that's not the end of the episode. That's not the end of the episode. I have a book of essays about my dating life in Chicago, and it's called Ten Guys Named Theo, and I sent them a new copy, which is why he knows that. Ten Guys Named Theo sounds like a celebrity band.

Ten Theo's I hate about you. Thank you. Okay, so we're looking for... Captain Hump. Captain what? Look, well, I also believe that when this voice bill is left, this is the baby who's gonna be born in March. So now we're getting suggestions as to what you should have named your child.

Yes. And anyone else can use these. So here's, here's some names that I like. Theo, Calvin, Teddy, name of your door. He could be Theo for part of his life, Teddy for the other part of his life. What else? I have some.

Please. My first, my gut instinct is to name a child Jacko. So that's Jack, hyphen O. And then of course, a little name would, middle name would be lantern. And then if your last name is like Williams, it would be like Jacko, lantern, Williams. I think that's really fun.

I'd also say, I like hyphenated. So even like nonstop, if you name the kid like nonstop, Belvedere or something, like nonstop is a great first name. And I think it also sets expectations that they'll just be like really hustling and really getting shit done. Um, and then I have, I have some suggestions. Please. I think that you cannot go wrong with an X-man name. Um you have your Charles, you have your Scott, you have your jeans, you have your storms, you have your Havocs, your Polaris.

I'm starting so normal. You're a night crawler. You could do Logan, of course Logan. Gambling. Colossus is also great if they're a boy. Jubilee is a great name. Thunderbird Iceman. Iceman if it's a girl. Lockheed, Kitty Pride.

So I want to know, just had a baby named Banner, and I never heard that name for a baby before, and it's so cute. And they call, yeah, and they, it's so cute. And they call him B as like a fun nickname, and I they, it's so cute. And they call him B as like a fun nickname, and I just, it's really cute, like B-E-E. Like that.

Yeah. So, I think, I'm gonna take, I'm gonna down this hill. I think city names should start to be first names. So like Flagstaff, Sedona, Sedona Williams. That's, isn't that beautiful? Sedona, Sedona Williams. Isn't that beautiful, Sedona? That's Sedona Williams. San Diego, Boston, Austin, did it. St. Louis.

St. Paul. Buffalo Williams. Hopefully that helped. So I'd say either an ex, name your child, it has to be one of these three. Either an ex name? He says, Edinburgh Revive. Edinburgh Revive. Either an ex-man, a city, or one of Aaron's exes.

And I think you'll be in good standing. And if you can find a city that is also an ex-man and also one of Aaron's exes, that's the trifecta. Oh. Oh. Try to think of that. I was like, I can't think. That's exes, that's the trifecta. Ooh. Ooh. Trying to think of that. I was like, I can't beat, that's not possible, right? None of the up-smitter city names.

Didn't you date a guy named Magneto and I'm gonna help them? Oh, yeah. Oh Magneto, Omaha, yeah, yeah. He was nice. That sounds like a football play of like a Magdino Obah 42. One of Aaron's only nice exes, Magdino Obah. Ha ha ha ha. He had a lot of fun.

Magdino, I thought that a Gambit Buffalo was pretty nice. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, mode, but a riddle. Thank you all for being with us for 250 years. If you want more content, please check out our patreon patreon.com slash hey riddle riddle air and keef. Do you have anything to plug or promote? Um, check out our socials. You can follow us at hey riddle riddle on Twitter and Instagram. I know sometimes people, uh, we've been getting messages that people, I feel like the live shows have been falling through the cracks a little bit, but we post all of our updates about where we're going to be and when on our social media. So if you want to be the first to know, check us out there. And then also check out the Come D&D if you can.

We've recorded with a few dream guests of mine and it's's been incredible. And so might be a good time to jump in. Addle anything to plug. Yes, I would say I've said it so many times. I'll say it again. I love receiving stuff in the mail. I love free stuff. If you want to send us something, please send us something to Hey Ritter Rittle,

6351 West Montrose Avenue, number 267, that's Chicago, Illinois, 60634 We've got a lot of cool stuff. We got in some pet toys recently for all of us. Just very kind of you So yeah, and if you check out the patreon live streams We've been opening a lot of those live. Yes in person on the patreon live streams and you can see our little faces light up So that's fun You can also check out hello from the Magic Tavern and tell me about it podcasts if you want to check those out. And JPC, do you have anything to

plug promote or a review to read? Not looking forward to this one. But if you want to get your review featured on the show, just go to iTunes, leave a five star review pretty much anywhere. I'm trying to cultivate them, call them from a lot of places. But five star reviews and it might be featured on the show. Today's review is from Patrick Dawkins, Patrick Wright's, five stars forever. Laura M. Ipsum, Dolor, C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C.

C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. at Dolore Magna Aquila. Oot in it, add Minim Verenim Quistnastrad, Exorcitation, Olamacol, Laboris, Nisi Oot, Alequip, XA, Commado, Consequat. My favorite podcast, either Patreon is even better. Patrick, thanks so much for putting some English words in there, although I do love reading Lordbips of Dext. Okay, GPC, you just read a lot of Latin and you read it very clearly with a lot of an unciation and i don't want to alarm you

but there's some sort of smoke or health fire rising up behind you you've clearly summoned some some color is it okay i think i might be the new pope i'm in the new pope i'm in the new pope it's like an orb um young pope youngish pope early mid thirties it It does early mid 30s. It does early mid 30s.

It does early mid 30s. Mid to late 30s. Here in the orb kind of, Jupiter and Co- Jupiter. Yes. Why don't you put that up in the pod? Oh, better.

Mid to late 30s. Turnip, four motherfuckers. That's my 30s. That's early mid 30s. Casey Tony to be editing. I'm already parod in the middle of the day. I'm a real man. I'm a real man.

I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man.

I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. I'm a real man. Yeah, I need to reply to JPC's tweet really quick actually. Oh, yeah, yeah.

We got a drive engagement. This is actually really good for the brand. What's this tweet? The tweet reads. Just got a news alert that says Don Lemon, Tucker Carlson, and Aaron Keefe are starting a riddle podcast. What the fuck? JPC's voice generated by AI. I said, I'm upgrading kind and sane hosts this time.

Wish me luck. Wow. Is that too mean? No. No. No, no, no, no. Oh, let's start a four hour recording, guys. Yeah, no, this is a good fit to get off on.

Cool. Hey! Hey, Aaron. Um. Cool. Cool. Hey. Hey, Aaron. Hey. Hey, there Hitchcock's and Tails. If you like that, you're gonna love this week's Patreon. We have special guest CJ Tour and brief hits Patrick on to explore a bowling alley. You can listen to that plus our entire Batcadilog at patreon.com, such as Hey Riddle Riddle, by joining

the crew for $5 a month or the Review Crew and you get those ad free episodes for $8 a month. See you there!