Hey Riddle Riddle - #255: YoBituaries!

Episode Date: June 7, 2023

Let me look into my crystal ball....mmm yes...I see ALL. It looks like there's mistaken identities in your future! Yesss. A bus? Don't ride the bus today. Is it your birthday? I see I see. You were popular in middle school? No? Ok my bad. Beware the new moon!  Starring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Editing by:  Casey Toney Theme by:  Arne Parrott Logo by:  Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to mail us something?  Hey Riddle Riddle  6351 W Montrose Ave #267 Chicago, IL, 60634 Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531) Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fm This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/riddle and get on your way to being your best selfSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a head gum podcast. Hello, we're in right here. Oh, hey, we're in right here. Oh, hey, we're in right here. We're in right here. We're in right here. Right here. Before, hey, we're in the ringtone. Hi, you are JPC and Adel Rathai, right? Oh, are you a fan? Uh, yeah, I know.

Well, yeah, that's who we are, yes. Did you want to picture? Oh, cool. You've been served. You are getting sued for doing a riddle podcast for way too many years. Hmm. Well, in that case, we're both willing to talk about

Aaron Keef if that will alleviate some of our sentence. Knock some years off off if that makes sense Yeah, oh doing this a side work. I hated to have to do this, but oh Hold on air did you serve yourself? Well, I can't really find me. I'm trying to find myself wait a second Wait a second. Wait a second Aaron. You have not been named in this lawsuit. This says that it's just Adela and I. Oh, weird. It said you tried to find yourself

by doing ayahuasca in Peru. But I spelled like every word wrong. Peru even? Even Peru? Can I, Aaron? Can I hear how you spelled it? I didn't start with a pee. So, I don't wait.

It's in the court summons. Take a look. No, no I don't wait. It's in here. Look at it. It's in the court summons take a look No, no, don't don't oh Aaron no Okay, so um Aaron who knows six letters are a B I O L. I Aaron It's both of Ravioli I Spell it

Oh You got sued don't know who sued you. That's your own business. It definitely wasn't me for attention. But Godspeed and good luck. It says whoever is suing us, their name has been redacted for their own protection. Yeah. And I spelled all those words wrong. Yeah. And then it was a you. It was redacted wrong as well. So it was just underlined instead of blocked out. It says arid keef with a big black underlined under it. And then there's also a weird little portion where it's, I guess it's referencing Billy Joel's you ought to know by now

where underneath redact it says redact act act act act act act act act act act. Yeah, I got that confused with the Atlanta's more set song. Oh, I wanted to make an Atlanta's more set. And then I forgot and I started singing the Billie Joll. And it looks like you included the chat G.P.T. prompt that you used to build the rest of this because it says, chat G.P.T.

Build me a lawsuit against you as halls. You spelled both of our names correctly, which 90% of the people in the internet can't do. Here's the craziest thing. I typed that into chat G.B.T. and it started making a lawsuit. GBT, JPC and it started GPC. I lost it against the two of you.

It just knew that you were the two biggest assholes in the world. That's so crazy. That computers know that now too. And Aaron, I'm looking at the second page here. And it's one of those games where it's a bald man and you have a little magnetic pin and you put the hair on him.

Mm-hmm. Look, now he has a mustache. Now he has a beard. Now he has some hair. Okay, in page three, it looks like it's that game where you have to like pull the floor away so that like water falls into lava. Is this an ad?

Are you ready to add to this court? Something. Doesn't matter. Just sign here and then we can be done with this entire interaction. Page six is, YoBitUaries? Did you mean,

OhBitUaries? I did not. It's like your mom and jokes. Because we call it out all the people who died recently on the roasted, to a Bolivian. Okay, actually, actually,

I don't know if it's the right project for you per se, but I do like the project. I do like your bint-weries. I think maybe this runs. Guys, I think we have an idea for a book. I think it's always a special book ever made. Uh, alright, Aaron. You brought it up, so we gotta talk about it. I'm on beverage watch. We've been on this call for 10 it. I'm not beverage watch. We've been on this call for 10 minutes. I've seen you sip two different beverages.

So tell me what do you drink? I'm well, uh, then you can do the final count when I show you. I have some tea. Okay. Cup of tea. I thought that might be a cup of tea. I have a polar. Yeah.

Cranes, we're polar family. I've got a mango factor smoothie. Uh, that third drink. She's pulling up a coffee. Oh And just that for each time have a water There's a water, but I don't want to reach that So it's a bit of a five drink morning. Yes And I wish I had more to be honest. I feel like I'm missing a couple categories. I kind of wish I had like a juice. But.

Aaron, how do you, is it one of those Amigo smoothie? Wait, what? Yeah, but I want like juice. Smoothies are not juice. Uh, Aaron, when you open a house, how do you not just, how do you not just slosh?

How do your insight is not just slosh around? I do slosh. Who told you I didn't slosh? I just assumed. Okay. Good to know. Good to know. Big old sip of the smoothie. Eris, you'll be very will definitely be how but she sloshes. You'll be too much. She's sloshin' in the coffin. Yeah. I'm sloshing. And of course, if you want to write us our you'll be two areas. Please use the hashtag you'll be two areas. I don't know how that car. And of course, if you want to write us our your Bituaries, please use the hashtag

your Bituaries. I don't know how that spell. Do you figure it out? Well, now I'm self conscious about my beverages and I feel like if I, if I vary up my beverage drinking too much, you guys are gonna make fun of me or judge me. Look, it's one of these things, like peel behind the curtain,

peel behind the curtain, the curtain's up in anna. And everyone is in that room. It's cheaper. It's cheaper, it behind the curtain. Peel behind the curtain. The curtain's up in Anna. And she burned it. It's she burned. It's she burned. It smells the same. It smells exactly the same as a normal curtain. We record it remotely. So it's kind of like a little magic show.

Because all I can see is Aaron reaching down and pulling up a different thing. So I have no conception of like what is in front of her, but it's fun to just see a bunch of different beverages into the frame. I wish I could reach down and pull up a rabbit from my back too. And here is other props.

With you pulling up five different mugs, it did look like Indiana Jones movie where he's searching for the cup of Christ. It did look like you were searching for the perfect vessel to drink your liquid out of Yeah, humble carpenters cup. I go over to Aaron's house I grab a smoothie out of the fridge and my flesh starts melting on my face That's actually not juice you were looking for juice fool Guys what's going on much what do we think

So that guy was probably a night in the knight's template, right? That guy who said you chose poorly. Which guy? Oh, Whitney and Jones, with the guy, I'm sorry. Yeah, the guy drinks, I think is it a German guy drinks from the wrong cup, because he picks the most ornate cup, the cup of kings. And then he melts away and the, I assume it's a night of the night's templer is like he chose poorly. And then Harrison Ford is like, well, let me,

let me use what's basically like an art teacher's pencil holder. And he's like, he chose wisely. What do we think that nights up to? Because he sat in that cave for like 10,000 years. And this is how I just want to start the show. It's just a real... Okay, so I mean, you can kind of extrapolate this to be like, what would your life be if you're sitting in a cave for 10,000 years? And 10,000 seems maybe a little off for Jesus' cup. We're doing a fiction, so why not? Sure, you know what? The earth, the earth we know is 8,000 years old. So if Jesus is 10,000 years old. A Home Depot skeletons are 100 feet tall.

So. I mean, I'm thinking that caves got a smell pretty bad because unless you're not doing the things that like you need to be doing bodily function wise, because maybe after, you know, 10,000 years, the factory shouldtling. Yeah, you're like, could you try it up a little bit? The seal goes back on the cap.

What? Could nights, could real nights, and we're talking about real nights, not fake, template nights. Could real nights kind of one and two out the front and back? Did they have like, was there little holes in their outfits? What to do with this? Good that I don't really answer to so Some riddles let's get to some riddles where you might know the answer

Sorry I went to the run fair this weekend and I saw a lot of people in full suits of armor. And I didn't see any holes. Oh, interesting. So, yeah, the hard part too is it's like, in order to wear the full metal armor, you have to wear like the leather jargon underneath it. So it's like you have another layer of clothes, like just taking off the metal,

you're still gonna have to take off all the leather's. Yeah. That's good. That was hot. What an awful thing. I think it's a diaper situation. If you're mid battle and you're all going to have to take off all the leathers. Yeah. Just to be high. I was hot. I think it's a diaper situation. If you're mid-battle and you're all that armor and you got to go behind a tree or something,

just awful. And there's arrows flying. Aaron, you went to a run fare. JPC and I went to a Stimpy fare. JPC, you want to tell what we saw? We got slapped in the face several times. Uh, they called the the idiots I know about I could break up here to help my friend

Adolf We're hearing him. I didn't go into this We're hearing his thoughts So let's get into our first riddle. This is gonna be part of the warm-up section So they use the warm-up section is typically easy or bad riddles What does a man do only once in his lifetime, but a woman does once a year? A man who doesn't have time and a woman who doesn't have time is in a year.

What does a man do only once in his lifetime, but a woman does it once a year? Is this apologize? Yeah. That's a very good guess. It is not that. I'll give you I'll give you a hint. This is let me let me give a longer Longer one's a year. Yes. Dies It's born Aaron how many times you died day? I don't know like what are you? Are you dead right now? What does a man do only once in his lifetime?

But women do it once a year after they are 29 is what I'll say. I remember this is a warm up. A very close, I mean you're technically right, but specifically, and remember these are very, very bad. Warm up riddles are very, very bad. What does a man do only once in his lifetime, but women do it once a year after their 29? The answer is... Oh, turn 30. Turn 30. Oh, God.

Is this a riddle from? Oh, wait, I don't understand. What does this mean? Only women lie about their ages. That's horrible. What is I'm so glad I didn't get it. I'm so glad I didn't understand it. I'm so glad I didn't understand it. This is like a bad memory.

The only people literally I've ever known that lie about their ages are men. So take that with a grand assault. The only ones I know who lie about their age are men. I think lying about your ages is an insane thing to do. But the only two examples that I have like that readily come to mind about lying about your age, and I guess, I'm familiar with that,

that Republican Congressman from New York, George Santos, who's been arrested, I don't, I, he's already been arrested, I think he's going down for some shit. He's on a ton of like wild shit, but one of the wildest things is that like, he lied about his high school, he lied about his college, he just lied about like all of his personal experience.

Is there any ethnicity I think? And no one knows how old he is. And he claims to be like 33, and everyone's like, no fucking way. Is this guy 33? But I think that's such an insane, like when you're just compounding lies and compounding lies, I think that's awesome.

I think I know. Oh, go ahead. And I won't, I won't, I won't dox this person, but it's a person in a friend's family who was divorced, an older person was divorced and like a remarried a person and remarried a person like way younger than them. This is a woman remarrying a man

and they were an older person, but it was like a 15 year age gap and the family was like wondering like, well, I wonder how they met like a 15 year old, 15 years younger person. And it turns out that person just lied. They just lied and said they were 20 years younger. And so that guy found out like years after they had

already been married, that he lied. Because they're already old, and he's like, wait, so you're like, wait, old. Like, I think it's very funny to lie about your age, but when you're like 75, when you're saying you're 75, but you're actually 90, like that's like, that's why I don't.

That's insane. I had a boyfriend in my 20s that lied about his age, and when I found out he got frustrated, he said it hurt his feelings that I didn't figure it out sooner. Oh, and Aaron, do you wanna say, that's a booth.

Do we want to say, Henry Cavill's name? Ah, yes. Henry Cavill in the Mission Impossible movie. Aaron, I do want to see a scene. You are a, we'll say a fifth grade teacher. JPC, you are a new student in the class. And you are maybe not the age that you are saying that you are. Hi everybody, your name tags are on your desk. So just find your desk and we'll get settled on the first.

Whoa. Hey, sorry, I'm late. Sorry. I got so turned around. I'm in the halls. I'm discombobulated. I miss spelling. Are you looking for your kid? No, are you Mrs. Johansson? I am. Yes, I am in your class. I'm Tommy. Tommy. I'm Tommy. Your kid?

Your kid, your kid is in my class? You flatter me. No, I'm Tommy. I am fifth grade. I am 11. And I am in this class. Hey, Deborah. Sorry to margin. Yeah, what's up? Hey, principal Sanders. Hey, hey kids, someone parked a 96 Ford F-150 sideways in the parking lot. Do you know? Yeah, I have a heavy, any parents here or anything? Um, those are going to seriously hard to park.

I know this is not my place and I will just, I will keep silent because we're doing spelling. It looks like, but yeah, those are hard to park. Uh, thanks. Printer, could you give us just a second? Yes, of course, of course. Just once I hear. Hey, Tommy, um, just wanted to say,

hey, enjoy, hey, enjoy. Crazy coincidence. You look a lot like my recent ex-husband, Thomas. You wouldn't be Thomas dressing like fifth grader trying to see me. I'm not sure. I honestly don't really know a lot of other. Does he have big glasses like mine? Yep. He does.

He does have these. Yeah, he has the exact same one. It could just be that we have the same glasses, but sometimes that, sometimes that I get confused with people that have, because it's a very specific type of glasses. How are these big glasses? What I thought maybe I could have, or he would have, or any combination of the two. He does have a lot of people wearing the glasses. Yeah, you are significantly taller than me.

You're like 64, same height as my ex husband. No fit greater. I'm gonna be a basketball player as soon as I hit my growth spurt. Great. You know what? You know what? Take a seat. You win. You're in this class now. I hope you like doing work. And fifth grader work is way harder than you remember it.

I'm sorry. What's going on here? It feels like I'm the only student in class is being picked out because of the hostility. I said I was like, I apologize. I'm a transfer student. It's the hallways are confusing to me. And I'm being kind of like, I don't know, it just being, I feel like I'm being very belittled. Mrs. Sanders. Midsire, miss Sanders.

Johansson. The joy. You always say Sanders. Do you say Thomas Sanders? mishanders. Johansson. Johansson. You always- Sorry, did you say Sanders? Did you say Thomas Sanders? That's not me. I'm sorry. That's not me.

My name's Tommy. Ms. Johansson. My last name is not Sanders. And if she wants to use her maiden name, that's fine. Ms. Johansson, do you always teach us that kindness is key? It's even above the door. Why don't you show this kid kindness? Yeah, hold on, I'm getting a phone call.

Wait, it's from Thomas. Yep, maybe take it. Hello? Hey, listen, I've been thinking things over and I, I think you were right to leave, and I have a lot of work to do on myself and I just hope that you can forgive me. Wait, oh my God.

If you're Thomas, then oh, kid, I am so sorry. You took a seat. I know what I look like. I know what I look like. I am used to being treated this way. I am so sorry. That's kind of why I had to leave my last school. I will be better.

I am so sorry. You know what? All you can do is be you and go on your journey. Okay, that's it. Is it cool if we smoke weed in class? See, where do I have to use myself with the pads? I love a transfer student be like, it's okay, I know what I look like.

I deserve to be true this way. To be bullied is my burden. I have a question for you. Did you say Sanders? Because I said my name was Thomas. And you were thinking about Thomas Sanders? I think I did. I assume my brain filled in the gap and it's like,

Thomas Sanders and then I was like, of course, that would make Aaron miss Sanders, miss Sanders, unless he did take his name. Yeah, get in line. I'll say, I don't Sanders. That's a nice ring. Thomas, if you're listening, what is always in front of you? Let me have your last name. I like it, I don't Sanders.

And then I'd be Adel Shokie Sanders. My initials would be, ass. I'm not the Speller here, Aaron. That's your department. Nope. I'm not nor a lie. You spelled Adel Ravioli, that's not my name.

What is always in front of you, but can't be seen? You're ass. Wait. You're future. Wait a minute. You're future. Your future's good. Your future's good. Your future's good.

Aaron. My wrong. Your future is dead right. Wow. Wow. I'd like to see a scene. Addle, you are a man who's going to a psychic to try to get some answers about what he should do

with his life. And JPC, you were trying to convince him that you can tell his future you are the psychic. Okay, got it. Oh, this is a cool lot of a lot of velvet in this room. This is cool. Yes, thank you. I'm sorry to startle you. I like to let people get acquainted with the room before I enter. Yeah, I didn't think I didn't realize you'd be coming from under the table. So that's, I'm sorry, I kicked you in the face. I just felt something and I...

It is okay. It happens. I should change it. Yeah, you should... I should change how I do it. You should have a little trap door under the table to... Yeah, it's your space. It's your space.

So here is... What brings you to see the great Zemboni? I want to know, I've been working the same dead-end job for 12 years. I feel like I'm going nowhere. I feel like I have no real romantic sort of prospect. So I just want to know what's in store for me and what can I do to sort of help expede that future for myself. Okay, here's the $800 in $1 bills. You asked for?

Yeah, and I'll count it later. Okay. here's the $800 in one dollar bills you asked for. Yeah, I'll count it later. Okay, because I trust you and that's trust is part of it. I put your hands on the... that's not crystal. It's a basketball. It's a basketball. Huh. So put your hands on the basketball. Okay. It doesn't matter. It could be any orb and so it's a basketball for me. Oh yeah, I guess the best one. You said you're stuck in a dead-end job 12 years, you've been in this dead-end job. Retail. Retail. Ah, close, close, close.

Yeah. Service, service industry. Ah, close. Yes, why? I- I kind of took an umbrella of industry, so you're in construction. Ah. Manual labor, physical.

Ooooo. Office desk job. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes. Yes, yes. Do you know? The fucked up thing is I had a dream last night before you came in where all of this was just kind of unpacking and spilling over. And so I, it's going to scare you, it's going to freak you out, but I actually know a lot

about your life. Oh well, what's the, I understand I guess now the orb the best ball what's this laptop on the table it's open to a search history for um Michael Talbot who that's me? Is this your laptop? Will you doing some work in here? No no no but my that my name's definitely in the Google search bar there. It's not my laptop.

Huh. So whoever's laptop it is I hope they come and get it and if it's not yours you can't take it. Okay. Okay. You already said it wasn't yours. No, you're right. If I saw a laptop with my name typed into it, I would say that's my laptop. Okay. And then I would take it. Okay. Maybe something to consider. Maybe you maybe a reason why you're in a dead-end job is because opportunities present themselves to you. Yes. But you don't see the opportunity. Yep, absolutely. So what? You don't see the opportunity. You have a boss I'm assuming.

Close. Tall. Tall, tall man. That would be five four. That's all for a man. That's all for a man. Yeah, five four woman. Historically.

Yeah. People used to be very small. You have to understand. Oh, should I be taking notes? Is there a, why? There's no reason to, Jesus was 4-1. Mmm. I'm sorry.

What was that noise? I just, I don't believe in Christianity, I don't believe in Jesus. Neither do I, but a factor of the matter is, I made Jesus live 10,000 years ago. Okay, be right. Okay, so you have a superior supervisor at your work. Yes, a boss. Yes, a boss. A boss. Perfect. A boss. You used the term earlier.

What you need to do is you need to discredit your boss publicly in a public way. I don't feel comfortable doing that. Oh, you don't feel comfortable? do you feel comfortable living your loser life for 12 years? Going along and getting along and getting nowhere? Paying $800 to touch a basketball? Don't, I can't, hey, come on. It's part of it. It's fair because it's part of it.

If you hadn't come here, I wouldn't be able to use it. But you're here and I can. And it's fair because it's part of it. If you hadn't come here, I wouldn't be able to use it But you're here and I can and it's fair. We got them Lisa Lisa bringing the team. We got them Never know what Lisa was up to Lisa was up to you. Give me a second. To catch a predator, we got him. Bring him in. Give me a second. Hold on.

Oh no, no. This is going to beat me senseless. I know. She's behind, but she's finally watching Game of Thrones. She's on the last episode, and she does not want to be interrupted. When you stop to look, you can always see me. But if you try to touch me, you can never feel me. Although you walk towards me, I remain the same distance from you.

What am I? Stop sign. Aaron, you are. Stop sign. No, you've read it right the first time. It is the horizon. Aaron, you are on Fior. Those five liquids are really helping you today.

I'm doing pretty well. Thank you. I'm going to get more than five. I only had two liquids so far today. I'm doing pretty well. Thank you. I gotta get more than five. I only had two liquids so far today. I gotta get more liquids in me. I know. So you can slash. So you can slash around.

Sloshing is the secret. I got a slash. I got a slash. Did you see I dare ask? Do you have a slash board? I'm working on having a slash board at. Okay. I was gonna say.

You gotta have a slash board. Make yourself a slash board. So what you do is it's a little cork board, a pinboard. You put up all the liquids that you want to be inside of you. Every night before you go to sleep, you check in with it, you kind of, you know, make a vision for it. And then you'll find that as time goes on, those liquids will definitely make an appearance in your life. All right, kind of moth. Liquids that you most want to be inside of you. Never go over the bullet. Gotta be blood.

Gotta be blood. I'm gonna say water. I'm gonna say water. You're doing water before blood. Oh, I can't stand that. It's a tap. It's a tap. I'm gonna say pee.

Wow. Good one. Good one inside. Good one inside. Usually one that people want to keep on the outside, but a good one for inside. Okay, so next on the draft, I'm gonna take with my second pick. I'm gonna take liquid shit. I Can't believe that I'm gonna take lemonade who's I want to trade down I want to trade down I

Guess I'm snatching up bio for basically free I get bio baby I'm gonna go Duncan Donuts iced coffee Well hold on I already took liquid shit What you say can hurt people words can hurt people at all Duncan Donuts if you're listening that was a joke stop hurting us with your coffee please Don't good donuts if you're listening. That was a joke. Stop hurting us with your coffee. Please, sponsor us.

James the United Greek. If you're listening, yeah. We, James the United Greek, we both had the new breakfast tacos. They're delicious for what? No, we said that they're fine. Well, for what they are. We said for what they are. If they were, if you were to judge them as a regular breakfast taco,

they're horrendous. But as a donut's breakfast taco, then at it then. For a fast food breakfast taco. They're horrendous. But as a donut, breakfast taco, then I did that for a fast food breakfast taco. They're pretty much as good as you could get air in your crying. Yeah, it just feels hard to hear. I don't know. Your fists are bald. There's blood running out of your eyes. Hold on, America ran down Dunkin America. She's summoning someone. Let's do let's do another riddle here.

Please, in a bus, there is a 26 year old pregnant lady, a 30 year old teacher, a 52 year old random woman, and the bus driver who is 65 years old. Who is the youngest? Now, is this is this a life begins a conception thing because we are gonna get it Way a lot of water over this one. Can you read that again? In a bus there is a 26 year old pregnant lady a 30 year old teacher a 52 year old random woman Which is rude to not just give her a job. What other jobs? What other jobs could we be? We've already covered pregnant and teacher. Ado, we can't know because women don't,

women lie about their ages, so we'll never know who the youngest is. And the air, that is the correct answer. They're all 30. The baby, I guess? The baby. The answer is the baby of the pregnant lady. Now, I don't know where I got these riddles.

So the past. The potential, the potential, the potential. Lose from that one. Might get an email about that one. I do want to see a scene. JPC, you are hopping on a city bus. You're the only person who hops on the bus. Aaron, you on the bus.

Aaron, you are the bus driver. And Aaron, for whatever reason, you think you're in some sort of like speed situation, even though there's really nothing to back up that claim. Great. Oh, wow, an empty bus. This like never happens. Sit down, sir.

Oh, yep, yes, I will. I I'm sorry is this bus in service? There's um wow where to start um maybe call your family because we are going on a ride. Can't slow down. You just stopped to pick me up. What do you can't slow down? No, I was still technically rolling. If you noticed, it wasn't totally stopped. I crossed the lacrosse walk and it seemed like maybe it was. I'll just... Sir, sit down. I'll just take my seat. You haven't started.

You haven't started going yet. Just to do that. Oh, okay, hold on. Oh, okay, we're going we're moving. Oh my goodness. Hey What's your name? I'm I'm Jack Mm-hmm. I'm Shandra Filling a lie. No, no, no not a not alive. We can't slow down the bus.

Okay. You're gonna have to jump off, roll off. Just wait here to die. I mean, we're still like 12 blocks from my stop. Could we get closer to where I'm going maybe, and then we'll... I saw the movie speed this weekend, unrelated to that. Someone...

That's like the bus. The bus, there's like a bomb in the bus moving, right? Yeah, and so then I saw that movie this weekend and then I was starting my shift today and I saw a ball, well, it's not a ball, it was a bomb. Get out of a kid's hand and roll under my bus and then I didn't see it come up the other side. So it latched onto the bottom of my bus

and it's going to explode if I slow down probably. Okay, so this is, you saw a kid bomber. Shandra, was your name? Shandra. Shandra, I'm so sorry. Shandra. Scared. I also am a person who does not like scary movies,

like stressful movies, suspenseful movies, thrillers. They mess with me, I just, I can't do it. Maybe you're just a person who, is that have you seen in the other like thriller movies? Is that the first kind of like, thriller that you've seen? First one, oh no, we're coming up to a bridge that's unfinished.

Hold on, see your butt. No. We're going over. There's no reason to, there's no no reason to this is not part of the road You're you're you're turning left to go to see all these cones These cones mean something okay, you're hitting all the Quit my dead-end job with my five-four boss see wasted life I can quit my dead end job with my 5-4 boss. See, wasted life.

I love, there's a kid with a ball, not ball, a bomb, a bomb. Yeah. You know, a bomb, a bomb. When it is alive, we sing. When it is dead, we clap our hands. What is it? Snake, hold on. Dead, stop.

We cannot dead stop. Dead stop on both of you. We're not snakes. Hold on. Dead stop. You cannot dead stop. Dead stop on both of you. I'll ask on both of you. Aaron, what did you say? I don't remember. She said birds. You say birds. Jamesy, what did you say?

I said snakes. Okay. You're really similar answers. So what's going on with birds and snakes? I mean, I know my mom told me about the birds and snakes. She said the performance. Tells you the birds and the snakes. I got, I know my mom told me about the birds and snakes. She said, the performance tells you the birds and the snakes. I got to see a very quick scene. This is the first date between a bird and a snake.

J.B.C. You're the bird, Aaron and a snake. So, do you have any siblings? Shit. Shit. Oh, shit. See. They're both still trying to make it work. They got there. They're like, uh oh. Not my time.

It's not worth sitting on me like shit with a snake. That's a lot of Chris Hanson. Oh, yeah. Is that the guy's name? The catch of Reddler guy? It has to be. Sure. Why not? When it is alive, we sing, when it is dead,

we clap our hands. What is it? Aaron, you also said some sort of play. Yeah, like a performance church. Is it a fire? When do we sing? Can you see fire songs? GBC, there is fire involved to some degree.

Fire is a part of this. So it's something when it is alive, we sing when it is dead, we clap our hands. Is it a multiple clap like a like a round of applause or is it one clap? Why? It doesn't matter. Well, that depends how many claps you think are in the friends opening theme song. 42 altogether summer hidden. It is a round it's like a round of applause.

Okay. Okay. And it's it could be, you know, it's it's definitely more than one. Who knows how long it goes on for, but definitely a round of applause. Is this Italian television show? Okay. What is alive? Oh, we sing. That does sound like the name of a tie and sitcom.

Welcome back to another episode of When It's Alive, we sing. God. What did you say, Aaron? How I'm just confused. It involving fire has really thrown me through a loop. Did you ever learn the song for a Rijaka? Yeah, for a Rijaka. Tell me you. Show me the manini.

Show me the dude. We all know the same song. Yep. Is that part of the answer? No. When it is alive, we sing. When it is dead, we clap our hands. What is it? So it doesn't involve fire.

I'll give you another hint. Okay. When the fire is still burning, is when we sing, and when the fire is no longer around, is when we clap. Is this like the fire engine singing to race to a fire and then everybody clapping when they put the fire out? That's a good answer. So you think like when an airplane lands sometimes

at Disney World or something, when fire fires, but a fire everyone burst into a floss? I think if I'm outside like my apartment building and it's burning down and the firefighters are putting it out, I think I give them a round of applause. I think it's nice. I think I wait to see what the situation is in terms of if lives are lost and then I'll clap.

Okay, well, yeah. I think if I'm standing out there and my wife is in the building, maybe I'm not clapping. In my situation, it was more just like, the building's on fire. The fire goes out. Oh yeah, I see, I see. Yeah, I think in any situation, I wait more just like the buildings on fire. Sure, sure. Oh, yeah. I see. Yeah.

I think in any situation, I wait to see if lives are lost. Maybe that's maybe my first thing that I do in a situation. When it is alive, we sing. When it is dead, we clap our hands. What is it? And I got to say, let me see if I can discern the exact number. But by the time that this episode comes out, by the time this episode comes out,

this will have been one week since I possibly experienced this exact situation. Oh, these are birthday candles. The items are birthday candles. When they're alive or lit, we sing happy birthday. When they're dead or blown out we clap our hands Yeah, I'd like to see this is a this is gonna come out after your birthday So I guess happy birthday whatever Interesting well

Last week's episode I think came out on my birthday and no one's studying things so oh No, I came out the day before never I was gonna say, uh, Happy day before. I'd like to see a scene. It's my birthday and you two are singing Happy Birthday to me, but when you start the song, you realize that both of you don't know the song. Oh, here she comes.

She comes. And the one. And the two. What's her name? Answering. And the three. And the four. And the five. And the six. And the two, and the three, and the four, and the five, and the six, and the seven, little heavens angel. Who's the tallest lady in the land, and she's growing turns of the moon?

One, first day down, two, more to go. Moon One A birthday down Two More to go That's 10 birthday's if I ever seen one Fingers crossed She's not really the room She's the witch She's just standing here watching us do this

We have to keep singing till she bows Burn the witch down It's her witch sleep she bows at the way down to which sleep birthday Drown the witch down drown the witch down and stuck a stoner top her head until I'm birthday. She is dead Bowie she bowing Oh my cat died You're what? My cat died this morning year what? Um, I died this morning. Um,

on my birthday. Did we forget that lyric? Oh, did we forget that lyric? Okay. Yeah, we can work that in. Yeah, we'll work that in. Um, remind us your cat's name. What's my name? Prongles. Oh, good. You knew it. Satan. We'll be right back with more singing happy birthday to Aaron for some reason after

this break. Prongles. That woman's name was prongles. Prongles. Hey, JPC, you know how I love, he looks sleep. I love that he looks mattress brand, best nights sleep of my life. I know not everyone is on board yet, so I secured award winning sleeper, Merrill Sleep. She's right behind that door, Merrill Sleep. Wow, she won the Golden Pillow for best sleep. That's right. Hey, Merrill. Hello, yes, hello, yes, um, uh, very well rested after sleeping on my midnight lux, Helix

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Oh, yeah. I got that a lot. Hey, Adel, hey, Yeah, I got that a lot Hey, Adel, hey, Aaron, I got a bone to pick with the two of you Sure, yeah, I wore the skeleton outfit just cuz I figured this was coming Happy Halloween a few months early. It's not yet. What is it? So you know how the two of you? I was like guys. I am always so hungry for lunches and dinners and the like and you, jokers, told me, oh, JPC, it's okay, all you have to do is take some, you know, American paper currency, tape it to your front door,

close the door, and then wait until someone brings you food. Well, I kept opening the door and the money was gone. So I had to tape more money to my door. I think you're thinking to work out all Dork cash. Yeah, you did dork cash. We told you door dash is the number one thing to you With door dash you'll enjoy next level convenience with delivery in the hour making it easier than ever To get whatever you want delivered to your house whether that be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat JPC which I don't know house, whether that be back to school supplies, or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know, what you eat. I eat back to school supplies.

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butter. I just got those from DoorDash and they were, they were on my porch within 20 minutes. And it's very, very dangerous because they're delicious. Did you fill your belly and your pantry? Uh, yes. Did you fill your backpack? I did. Okay. Well then DoorDash has come again for the gold. I Remember distinctively the stress of going back to school and going from store to store to get all my favorite snacks and Pencils and pencil cases and all the things that I needed me and my siblings and I remember how stressed my mom was and I know that you would have loved To have DoorDash so she could be prepared before the big was and I know that she would have loved to have door dash so she could be prepared before the big back to school day arrived. So you can stock up with go to breakfast lunch box staples and brands that you love.

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You're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm um Yeah, you're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm Prinking at all and I'm setting up a website to Okay, I just need some advice this podcast is sponsored by Squarespace I'm not I'm not mad at you. We're pranking Spaces to all the one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and to see it online Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience,

and sell anything for products that cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms. Hey, Otto, come here, come here, come here. Hey, what's going on? I actually, I want to prank GPC, and I want to set up a whole website to prank him. Do you have anything that like, is there like an online store that could set up

on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace, you can have custom merch. You can easily sell custom merch and create passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production, and inventory and shipping are handled for you,

saving you time and money. What is happening? Okay. Wait, what's going on with Addle? Oh, nothing, nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal Squarespace website, not a prank thing. No, he's gonna tune you.

And I'm gonna use analytics, use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool. I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my Prank website, the Prank site too. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace.

Did you say what the website was for? I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. Prank. With Squarespace, you can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party tools to extend the functionality of your website. Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, Vattle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine.

Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back, she's back. Hey, Aaron. Hey, Aaron. Can we go to grandma's house? Wait, I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha We did it. We worked at a birthday song to prongles about her dead cat. And please feel free to record yourself singing that entire birthday song to one of your friends or beloved ones and send that to us at HRRpodcast.gmail.com.

I'm going to say, let's do a couple more riddles here. to us at hrrpodcast.gmail.com. Not gonna say. Let's do a couple more riddles here. Does that sound fun? Yeah. Okay. You're not lying to me. Buddy, I have cleared my schedule for this. Seems like you're multitasking.

Here's a bad little stinker. How can kids drink beer and not get drunk? You're the pinched. You're the pinched. And not get drunk. Group beer, it's root beer. It's root beer. By sticking to root beer.

I do, I do what I see a seed. I want to see a seed. I wasn't even listening to the answer. The rental root beer is something that it doesn't matter. Adel, you are going to be, okay, so you know, like at fancy balls, they would be like the guy announcing the Lord Lady as they enter the room. Absolutely.

That's your job, except you're doing it at a middle school dance, and you have utter disdain for these children as they were doing the room, okay? Okay, perfect. Coming up now to the dance floor, here we have it, that little fucking trodler like Tommy and his date today The insufferable in Horrible loud mouth Rebecca Florence Oh my god, what?

Don't pay don't try to do us. We're just trying to sneak in Oh, and right behind them bringing up the rear as it were, because this guy's a little fucking butt snapper. Which is why I said bringing up the rear as it were. And she's got chapped lips for days, and everyone knows it. People can see it! It's Beatrice Tomtrix and Tomtrix Bupsoap. Oh man, we should never have come together with similar names like this.

Oh look who finally decided to arrive. It's the coolest kid in school. There's nothing you can do to stop this. Yeah right, they're the coolest. It's clock, so handsome it hurts. And he's like six, seven somehow. Can you say that about a kid? Six, seven it hurts?

What did I say? It's a tall kid, you shouldn't say handsome. Well, listen, as we all know, Mr. Johansson confused a fifth grader for her ex-susband recently, so we're all on the nice. Rightfully. Yeah, right, you're right. Yeah.

Um, what a, what can I say? Let's kill this guy. No, no, hold on. Hold on. Yeah, if we all bear together, we can kill him. Yeah, we're going to live in pool. Yeah, of course. What's Tommy Weak arm is going to do, huh Tommy?

Kill him. I don't know. I've never killed anyone before. My arms are so weak. Or Danny Dissenteri. Danny Dissenteri, what are you going to do to me, huh? Who told? Who told the rabbit?

Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit?

Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Who told the rabbit? Is this guy bothering you? I'm like 6-7. I could easily dispatch this guy plus... Clark, I'm training school. Craft my god because... Well, I served at the IDF for a little bit.

Wait, your shirt says craft MAGA. Crave MAGA? I'm by for an errand spell bit, so that's why. Oh, I see. All the kids understand. Oh, yes, of course, of course, of course. I know I've told the story a bajillion times, but quick reminder that when I was in no pair, I saw those little girls drunk and it turns out they had been drunk a lot. And we didn't know. We didn't realize. I just a funny thing I've ever seen.

Have you told this story? I think I have. Have I heard this? I don't think I just the funniest thing I've ever seen. Have you told the story? I think I have have I heard this I don't think I for it. They're pretty new. Hey look if you if you have told this story And it's not been in a hundred episodes. Okay. Well, if you're new to the show I was in a Oh pair in Australia and I loved the family that I worked with they're the sweetest now. They're like in high school. Everyone's fine but they were four and eight. Yeah. When I started watching them. And it was the weekend. So I wasn't on duty. And the mom came

rushing into my room. She was like in a flop sweat. And they were having a play date with their two friends from down the road. And their mom was crazy. A like person, crazy lady, everyone was scared of her. Yes, yes. Yes. So they're over for a play date, which everyone's already on edge, and I'm hiding in my room, because I'm so scared of this family. She swings up in the door and she goes, Heron, they're drunk. They're drunk, Aaron, they're drunk. And I was like, who's drunk? And she was like, grabbed my wrist and pulled me and they Yeah, everyone has like a back refrigerator in Australia where mostly they keep booze and the girls had gone in and opened a Couple beers and we're drinking the beers and then they made the little one

show them and she took them behind the shed and there was a pile of booze that these little girls had been drinking. How old? They had been drinking beer. How young we talking? Four and eight. Oh, okay. So we put that together. That's too young for beer. We had to go over to the friend's house and go, hey, your kids are drunk. Your kids are drunk. And it wasn't so it serious, but they weren't, they were never drinking more than like one beer at a time, collectively across all of them. So it wasn't like totally scary or harmful, but it was serious, but it was also the funniest

thing I've ever seen. Now that I know that they're okay to see a drunk for an eight-year-old, it was so fly. Thank you, Casey. It was the wildest day of my life. It was so sad and to be funny. And everyone was fine. But, yeah, those little girls were.

You never really... A really Australian girl with an accent drunk. Insane. Insane. You never really want to see something like that, but if you do get to see something like that, you gotta take a least a second to be like, this is pretty weird, right?

Yeah, that would have been Aaron, you had a, this is before the invention of it, but you had a smash TikTok on your hand and you fumbled the bag, but of course TikTok wasn't around back then. I do want to introduce a new segment and this is just going to go for, I guess however long you two want it to go.

This is called, what do we want to call? Let's give you a second here. This is called float my quote. And what it is is the two of you are going to take turns and you're just going to say out loud, quotes that a drunk four to eight year old might say, and we'll just go till we run out. Okay.

Okay. What am I doing with my life? Aaron whenever you're ready. Oh, sorry. Let's see. I can start. Yeah. Is this a new Batman doll?

Is this a new Batman doll? Okay Is this a new bad man dog? Okay, thank you Is Olaf here? I want to fight him. I want to fight him. I want to I want to fight him Okay, I'll do one. Are you napping at me? Are you napping at me? What's end on that? We're not gonna get it That is horrifying. I something I want to mention this is I, this is, I guess this is a bit of an opposite, where it's a older person trying to look cool in front of young kids. Yeah.

Myself and Matt Young are... What's going to skateboard out? What's going on? I think turns out backwards, puts on sleep. Shemmi makeup. Oh, he's hurt. He fell. He fell. He's hurt.

Wow. Myself, Matt Young and Arne Neekamp were all recently on the road for just for a couple days. And we went to a McDonald's, famously. And there was a, I want to say a gaggle of teens, just like probably 13 to 15 year olds, there was, I don't know, quite a lot of them. And they were all, it's kind of intimidating to walk through them, because you're just like, what are these guys gonna do?

They're all kind of laughing. They could make fun of you at any moment. And Arnie proposed the question of, what is the one thing you could do to go up to a group of high school age kids who seem like they're gonna be bullies? What's the one thing you can go up and say to get them to like laugh or respect you? And we couldn't really come up with anything until Arnie came up with laugh or respect you like those are seem like two different things. What are you trying to do here? Yeah laugh at you laugh with you to keep from like making fun of you kind of laugh like to be like this guy's cool kind of thing. Oh okay so you want to make these kids think you're cool. Yeah yeah okay got you.

So already but already came up with the perfect answer, which is you walk into the center of them or whatever. You single out one kid and gesture towards him and you just say, this guy sucks, am I right? And- Yeah, but then you're also actively bullying a kid. Well, Aaron, that's fine to do in this hypothetical, but already specified, you have to kind of luck

into pointing at the right kid. Yeah. Because if you nail it, if you nail the right kid, everyone's gonna explode and be like, holy shit, even this 45-year-old guy gets it. I think that's a high risk though. Yeah. It's a low risk for Ernie because he's like 6'7".

So if a 6'7 guy came over to me with my friends, he was like, hey, it looks like Josh is a high risk though. Yeah, it's a low risk for Arnie because he's like 6'7. So if a 6'7 guy came over to me with my friends, he was like, hey, it looks like Josh is a little dipshit. We don't even like Josh. Fuck Josh. If you're going to kill anyone, I'm going to kill Josh. Arnie is a very tall man, very tall son. Let's do one more riddle here. If I wanted teens to respect me, I would walk up to a group of teens hanging outside of

a McDonald's or a gas station or whatever, I'd go up to them and be like, hey, can one of you buy me beer? Wow, that's pretty, it's like reverse psychology. I think if I wanted anyone of you to go in there and buy me beer. If I wanted to get a teenager to respect me or a high school kid, what I would do is I would dedicate five to ten years of my life to Worship of the Lord. I would train eight hours a day to tone and strengthen my body and then one day I would book myself in their high school auditorium as part of a power team to rip phone books in half and

as part of a power team to rip phone books in half. And the look in their eyes, when I rip a phone book in half and say, Christ is risen, if I scan the auditorium, I'm sure I'll see nothing but respect and tears in everyone's eyes. If you ripped a phone book in half in front of me, teen, a modern day teen, they would all look at you and say, what was that? What was that he just did? I don't want teens to respect me.

We did that, we did not. You didn't have power teams come to your school? We never did. That sounds cool though. I understand the concept, but we never did. So Aaron, you don't want teens to respect you. Do you want them to fear you? Do you want them to not even acknowledge you?

I want them to not even register me as a person. I want to look like a pile of clothes or like a curtain to them. I don't want them to see you. Okay's a person. Okay, smart. I want to look like a pile of clothes or like a curtain to that. I don't want them to see me. Okay, that is. I don't want them to be like a pile of clothes to a team because who knows what they'll do with a pile of clothes. There and go with you some stuff.

There's four modes involved. I don't want to mess with it. Yeah, I take that back. Let's do another riddle here. I'm white, I'm round, but not always around. Sometimes you see me, sometimes you don't. Santa Claus, my name. Aaron.

Oh. Wait a minute. Santa Claus, Aaron? Aaron, do you have anything you want to tell us? Hold on, take my hand, cover's up. The top of Aaron's head, the eyes. Her face is gone. It's her! It's head the eyes It's her I put my hand too high I covered up her eyes completely

Hold on a duck sorry. I have no object permanence. I thought I just killed Aaron by removing her eyes That she's still around to deliver presents That's what you're still around to deliver presents. What's a year? I do want to see a scene. I will get to this riddle, I guess at some point, but I do want to see a scene. Aaron and JPC, the two of you are on, you guys, you two have been dating for maybe six months or something. And Aaron is probably end of November.

So you've been dating for six months. It's end of November. And Aaron, you have to finally break it to this person you're dating that's come December, you might have another job requirement that he didn't know about. Cool. Hey. Hey.

Hey. How was work? It was fine. I mean, just kind of like, you know, I'm TGIF, right? So just glad it's a, it's not the reason I don't have to think about, you know, I'm TGIF, right? So just glad it's a good thing. I don't have to think about, you know, kind of unplugging, don't think about that shit for another couple of days. Um, how about you? I was, oh, sorry, go ahead, no please. Sorry, there's just, um, there's no good time to do this. Can you take a seat?

We have to talk. Uh, yeah, what's going on? Um, babe, I know I promise that I would never lie to you or whatever. Um, oh shit. But I have, um, it's right around the corner, so I feel like I can't hide it anymore, but um, December is sort of going to be crazy, uh, a crazy month for me work wise, and I wanted to give you a head-up. Oh my god. Oh Fuck, I thought this was gonna be something else. Uh, no, that's totally cool. I mean, are you worried about like family stuff? Because I know it's only been like six months, so it's like I think we could do our own

holidays We don't have to like be a part of each other's thing if that's no. I mean, I definitely have to do our own holidays, we don't have to be a part of each other's thing. No, I mean, I definitely have to do my own holiday. I can't really avoid it. I will never be able to spend the holidays with your family. Well, maybe for a second, but yeah. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. What do you mean?

I know you're a consultant. It's an important job. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. What do you mean? Like what? I know you're a consultant. It's an important job. But like what does a consultant do around the end of the year that makes it so busy? I'm not saying that I don't believe you were or whatever. I just don't know. I just don't know what it is. Right.

I just will have to travel for work. It's technically a day, but it turns sort of into like two and a half days with time zone stuff. I guess I just don't get like what I was so sorry. I just guess I don't get what your job is Because it's sort of like a toy delivery service that is also sort of a judge of like the ethics of the global World sort of like I'm sort of a measure of how good people were this year and then I sort of deliver gifts and toys to the people who were good as a reward system.

Wait, I'm sorry, wait, this is... are you fucking with me? This is you're talking about, this is Santa Claus. This is what Santa Claus is. Oh, okay, so you're familiar with This is Santa Claus. This is what Santa Claus is. Oh, okay, so you're familiar with Santa Claus? Do you really understand? Becky? Becky, what do you mean? What do you mean I'm familiar with Santa Claus?

That's a children's. They look at me. Babe, look at me. Coming this December to the hallmark. Who the fuck is this? Babe, I'm Santa. You saw her, he's with me. Sorry, Sandra Bullock, as Becky, slash Santa Claus.

Sandra Bullock, I Sorry. Sandra Bullock is Becky slash Santa Claus. Sandra Bullock I wish Sandra Bullock Every time I see Sandra Bullock pop up in something I'm like, oh, yeah, she's fantastic. Yeah, she's great I've never seen her be bad in a movie. I've seen her in bad movies. I've never seen her be bad in a movie. Oh, really? Uh-oh.

What about that? Uh-oh. One with Bradley Cooper. Yeah, what's it called? Better off, no. What's it called? We watched that recently. Steve Eve?

Yes, Steve. It's like better off Steve or like. That can't be something. Oh my God, what is the name of the movie? We can't just leave it here What is that player? We will get so many emails telling us that it's that people are already gonna stop and be like it's this It's this better off Ted is a TV show all about Steve all about Steve Instead of all about Eve the old Hollywood movie I see I see I see hey

I'll tell you this much all about Steve not a loose and a bad Eve, the old Hollywood movie, I see, I see, I see. Hey, I'll tell you this much. All about Steve, not only is it a bad movie, but everyone who's in it is doing a bad job. Well, I watched it recently, and it's worse than anyone could have possibly guessed or remembered it's horrible. I remember watching that movie, and being like, do I not like the genre of romantic comedy?

It almost ruined a genre that I like a lot. It almost made me think I don't like the genre. That's bad. Okay, what started as a celebration of Sandra Bullock became a weird rabbit hole of talking about all about Steve. So everyone watched all about Steve. Maybe that's what we'll do for our June review crew. We'll have to. No, I, I guess we already do. We've already settled on it, so it might be too late. What is not too late for and what it's never too late for is...

Oh, to answer this fucking riddle. To answer this riddle. I'm white, I'm round, but not always around. Sometimes you see me sometimes you don't. I don't like a snowflake or a snow globe. You're not around a golf ball, a golf ball. Oh, you're closer with snowflake. The golf balls are pretty good answer to this riddle that the moon. Aaron, what was that? The moon. It's the moon. And I do want to see a quick scene. Aaron, you are out in the forest all alone and looking up at the night sky. And you see the moon come out played by JPC and Aaron are gonna make a little wish to the moon.

Hey moon it's good to see you. Huh? Can you... Who's talking? Who's talking? Someone whisper into the moon? I'm sorry, I was. I'm lost in the forest and I... It's fine. I can't see you. I can't see you.

I got my back to you. You're looking at my back. You're turned around. You're looking at my back. My face on the other side. Hey, lady. Yeah. Pardon me, it's just I, Ursula Major. You may not want to start a conversation with him. Why?

Who's talking? Who's talking? You're on your own. Is it coming? Are you having it back there? Um, hey lady. Who was that, huh? I really thought that you were facing the earth.

You're telling us that your butt has been to us this whole time? Sometimes. I don't take to just like anybody else, I think. That's why they call it moaning someone. Your back voice is that. I'm out. That's so familiar. I know I've heard that in this guy.

Well, I'm going to bed. It's nice meeting you. There is nothing going on on this side of the earth tonight. Oh my god. It's Norseville. You say you're in the bed. It was nice meeting you. Nothing going on on this side of the earth tonight. Oh my God, it's Norseville. You say you're in the woods? Oh, so no, I'm sleeping, sorry. No, it's okay, I'll keep you up. I don't mean to talk.

See. I never started a conversation with the moon. Aaron, you were right, it is the moon. I'm right, I'm around, I'm not always around. Sometimes you see me, sometimes you don moon. I'm wide and round. I'm not always around. Sometimes you see me. Sometimes you don't part two. Mm-hmm. Nice, see me now you don't part two.

Hey, the moon, that was no voicemail, right? We got it. It was no voicemail. Casey, can we hear that banging new theme? So you think you got something to say so you called up the clue crew. And now you think you should ask for advice You got something to say so you called up the clue crew and now You think you should ask for advice and hope that it gets through

In JPC Or if I'm just a phone call away You tie a five-bed old one so leave your message today Five-bin-oh-one, so leave your message to you, then. Beautiful. Wow, that was, that was coming, and I need to give you permission to use your name, so I'll just say it's coming from Taylor. And Taylor says, that's a little binfold. And I can hear a little binfold's vibe

in that voicemail game. Absolutely. If you want to submit a theme, you can always send that over as a way file to hrrpodcast.gmail.com. And guys, should we try to keep it to 30 seconds about we got some long ones. And guess what, I'll play them,

but I think I got it, I think I got to stop to think with the long ones. If a theme appears on the show, and it is over two minutes, that's one that I did. I can make these guys listen to things that I do for two minutes. Come on, man. Yeah, and it's in it's because that's punishment

I do that Because I get sexual gratification But no nothing for all of you fans out there. That can't be right Casey can you go ahead and play our voicemail? Hey This is Mark and Eastport Maine. I'm standing outside the Polar Tree right now, formerly the dairy barn, about to get myself a little lunch and ice cream treat.

I was just wondering what your go-to's are for year fix during the summer, wherever you may be, if you're in Chicago or Boston or L.A., wherever, and also look up Eastport on a map, give you a little bit of a kick. Thanks, bye. So why would, thank you so much for the message. Why would looking up Eastport on a map give us a kick?

Because Eastport in Maine is a little island in Maine. It's one of the little Maine islands. Wow. Yeah. I love Maine. And I do love a place called a dairy barn. Yeah, clearly ripping off dairy queen. He said before that it was called

like the polar shack or something, that was it. It's either one of the other. Or a tree. The dairy barn was what it was before. It doesn't matter. Because it's a great question. Yes. That I look a little summertime ice cream trade.

Oh man, that is, I do love a little summertime ice cream trade. Yes, I will. James, yeah, I think you recently discovered this place. It's called the chocolate choppy. Or choppy choppy. Depending on how you want to say it. I like to say choppy.

But it is fantastic. I will go there and get some sort of like waffle cone, maybe a dipped waffle cone with fudge or something. And then I like to get some mint chocolate chip. I think mint chocolate chip is my favorite to eat out of a cone. Interesting. Or also I might find myself getting some Italian ice, which I think is a delightful little treat in the summertime. Also, watermelon with fetichese is a very good summer treat. Yeah, my buddy Lawrence, we had a little get together and he brought over like a salad that was watermelon

and feta cheese and it was fucking, watermelon cucumber and feta cheese, delicious. So good, so good. So good. You know what, I just went there like last week. We had some friends in town and we sat outside and we, and it was really nice outside. And I don't necessarily know that this is like a

refresher, like summertime little treat, but Brian Iceblood, a brownie Sunday with strawberry and chocolate ice cream and Man, I ate the whole thing and I felt sick to my stomach, but I love the remittin' of it. Aaron, what about you? Well, if I'm going out to get something, I like to get froyo, but I just do the tiniest little dollop of froyo and then just as many toppings as I can. So basically I go out for candy and fruit

candy and a little bowl. But if I'm at home I like to have creamsicles on hand. Nice. Just sit on outside, eat a creamsicle. So good. That's my favorite little summer treat. A creamsicle for the summertime. Or Sunday at friendlies. If I'm back in Massachusetts that it's sometimes the only thing I ever want to eat with Sunday at friendlies, if I'm back in Massachusetts, that it's sometimes the only thing I ever wanna eat with Sunday at friendlies. I still really enjoy otterpops. They whisk me back to my youth, if you ever see those. I'm not like a sound so nice when people say it,

but when you think of whisking, it's like a violent moment. I get to see that. I get to see that. I get to see that. I'm not like a popsicle or like a really handheld ice cream guy with the exception of an ice cream sandwich. I do really love an ice cream sandwich, but that's anything stick-based thing.

I'm not really into the fruit side of things like the flavor ice stuff like that, not really into that. Do you like, because I don't think, I don't know if this is technically an ice cream sandwich. Do you like Klondeg bars? No, because are they like, what is a Klondeg bar? What would you do with a Klondeg bar or four Klondeg bars? Are they like minty? Do they have like a minty?

No, I'm just a them. They just have a terrible ice cream to chocolate ratio. There's too much ice cream. Oh, it's basically a chocolate shell. It's hard to eat too cold. Yes, a huge block of ice cream. Okay, yeah, yeah, no, no, thank you for a Claudette bar for me.

These port main has a really cool mermaid statue that definitely comes to life. Ha ha ha ha ha. Interesting, interesting. I'm learning a lot. Speaking of things that make us come to life, Adel, is there anything that's giving you life recently that you would like to plug?

Thank you for reading my intro I wrote. What's giving me life lately and something I recommend you all rush out and do if there's still time. I hope there's time is go see fast 10 in 4dx. I don't even get Casey started on this. I've seen maybe four movies in 40x now. It is the only way I want to experience certain movies. The second Avatar movie was fantastic in 40x. And now this, maybe the best movie I've ever seen in 40x

is Fast 10. So go see that. JPC, myself and Casey all went. We were violently jostled. I heard the whole movie. I heard phones hitting the floor left and right. Every 20 seconds you just heard the smack of someone's screen case breaking. The best part about a 40x movie, do this.

When you go to the theater to see a 40x movie, do not watch the screen. When the 40x effects start, watch the audience. Because you will see people who regret buying the snacks that they bought. Because they are on them or on the floor. And it is so funny. It is so funny to see you're on the floor. start watch the audience because you will see people who regret buying the snacks that they bought because they are on them or on the floor. And it is so funny. It is so funny to see live reactions to people being like, why would they sell me this drink? It's just going to go everywhere. I choked down. I mistakenly got a giant soft pretzel with hot, hot nacho cheese. And I, I choked it down within like 10 seconds getting into the theater because they didn't give me

like a case and I just had a cup of hot cheese and JBC was like, you better eat that now. There is a reason you don't see people get on the roller coasters with big gulps because that shit don't work. I would love to see a guy confidently get a go on a roller coaster with nachos. Like what?

Nachos on a roller coaster. My hot chocolate with no top. I also, I can't fathom how, I don't understand how there hasn't been like 2,500 gloss suits against 4DX. But until there is and still around, please go see a movie and ideally fast 10. Aaron, is there anything you want to plug or anything that's been giving you life? Oh, I'd say check out sitcom D&D. We have lots of really good guests come in down the pipeline

And I think it's a good time to give it a shot if you haven't yet lots of good guests come in the pipeline Mario So you heard JPC it can you read a review of the show? Yeah, and I'm really regretting that I didn't do a little bit of research on this before But let's go into it. This is a review for a mystical target. Mystical target says great podcast. I said a hip hop, the hippie, the hippie to the hip, hip hop. You don't stop the rock into the bang bang boogie. Say up jump the boogie to the rhythm of the boogie, the beat. Pretty confident with that part. Now what you hear is not a test. I'm rapid to the beat and me, the groove and my friends are going to try to move your feet. See, I am JPC and I'd like to say rapping to the beat and me, the groove and my friends are going to try to move your feet.

See, I am JPC and I'd like to say hello to the black, to the white, to the red, and the brown, the purple, and yellow. But part does it, does it age well? But first I got a bang, bang, the boogie to the boogie. Say, up jump the boogie to the bang, bang, boogie. Let's rock. You don't stop. Rock the riddle that will make your body rock.

Well, so far you've heard my voice, but I brought two friends along. And next on the mic is my friend. My man, Addle, come on Addle. Sing your song. I said, hotel, mo, tell, holiday. Holiday in. I said, if your girlfriend's acting up, then you take her friend again, doesn't hold up.

That part actually does hold up, bro. Oh, friends are interesting. You should get to know that. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I thought was very funny. Thank you so much, Mr. Glotarget. If you wanna read it, leave a five star review on Apple iTunes. I might read it on the show and it isn't that fun for you and for all of us. You know, it's also fun for you and for all of us. Is a friend of, and I don't wanna say its name,

but a friend of the M-O-O-N in the next guy. Oh, no, I was gonna, you're raking him up. It's, I guess it's like a family member of, I guess we're gonna family, yes, yes. Bye, forever. No, bye forever. He's waiting. Who's talking back there?

No, no one. We're sleeping. You up, believe this. I'm turning around. And John Patrick Cullen. Casey Tony to the editing. Now are he parodied in the music? Oh no.

Oh no. Created by Emily Cardamus and Emily DeBora. Hey there brackets and sequels, if you like that you are going to love this week's Patreon. We continue the streak with Addles favorite things bracket. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the Clue Crew for $5 a month or the Review Crew, and you get those out free episodes for $8 a month. See you there! podcast.