Hey Riddle Riddle - #259: Go And Be Good w/ Zach Reino & Jessica McKenna

Episode Date: July 5, 2023

It's been about 200 episodes, so we thought we'd have our old pals Zach and Jessica back on the podcast to do something that, look, isn't quite riddles. It's not even that close to riddles. But we still have a good time! All that plus we have two publishers and a prospective client, two literary titans enjoying a dinner, an enthusiastic office worker, and a team that just might go all the way this year. Don't forget to check out the next phase (and the entire back catalog) of The Off Book Podcast Starring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Special Guests: Zach Reino Jessica McKenna Editing by:  Casey Toney Theme by:  Arne Parrott Logo by:  Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to mail us something?  Hey Riddle Riddle  6351 W Montrose Ave #267 Chicago, IL, 60634 Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531) Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fm  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgun podcast. Hey Aaron, you're JPC and I would like to talk to you. Yeah, sure. Hold on. Hey. Take a test. Hey, yeah, sure. Hold on. Yeah, just come on in. Hey, I'm. Take a take. Hey, hey, um, you're not, I just want to start. You're not in trouble.

Um, JPC and I, we found, uh, riddles under your bed. Those aren't mine. Hey, no, no, no, you're not in trouble. You're not in trouble. It's fine. It's fine. You know, you're Adela and I actually, we did a, we did some riddles ourselves in our younger days

What? Yeah, yeah, yeah, tell me that No, so you should know you should know about it. We did a what was called a podcast back then. I think you know them is Brain audio today, but they were they're quite fun to listen to but we we solved puzzles and riddles and lateral thinking problems, kind of. Gross! That's beautiful. No, it's beautiful. I don't want to hear you two talking about it, though. Okay, you are in trouble.

Are you doing riddles while driving? No, of course not. You're going to build that in a health class. I want you to smoke the whole riddles. You're going to smoke the whole riddles. We want to see to smoke the whole riddles. You're gonna smoke the whole. We want to see you smoke the whole riddles in front of us. And you're gonna get so sick of riddles, you're never gonna want to buy another book.

Yeah, you're gonna get me an unhealthy relationship with riddles. Well, it sounds like you already had one, okay? We'd rather you solve riddles at home than do it anywhere else. So go ahead and you know what? Actually, before you start smoking those, we brought in two, we brought in two we brought in two professionals to help you with this. This is not like whatever that Chris Farley said was this is totally different. It's not going to be that nobody's going to

it Aaron nobody's going to fall through a table in a comical way. I just saying well you have this big table in the room and I know you always anticipate someone falling through it but they're not going to okay Please welcome professional speakers Jess McKenna and Zach Reno come on come on in here Well, hey there Aaron. Hey Aaron. Hey Aaron. Don't worry. Don't be scared. Don't go. We're here. Don't be scared Don't worry. Yeah, we just got out of a big van. Oh, no. Yes, it was recently parked down by the river. Oh, boy.

Oh, you promised. Aaron, don't be scared, OK? Listen, this might shock you, but Zach and I also used to dabble in lateral thinking riddles. Ew. We used to do riddles, number riddles, Sedoku. Ken, Ken. Oh, we'd get a Ken Ken book and we would,

days would go by and we'd wake up and say, what happened? They're getting so close to that table. I know. We'd be, hold on. Let me go to your kitchen. You got any cereal boxes here? Sometimes cereal boxes have fun easily accessible riddles

on the back of them. Let me put some of these cereal boxes on this nice table you got right here He's in the bathroom. He's taking our medication I don't get them to leave I wanted to get out of here. I don't know how I'm hearing Aaron we were called here because you got some good people in your life and they're concerned You know they're concerned about you and your well-being and we just don't want to see the same thing happen to you that happened to us. Live it in a van! Parked!

Mother river! Dear river! Don't hike up your pants. Just fall into the table, just get this over with. Well, we have to hike up our pants, Addle, because we ran out of money for smaller pants, because of all the riddles. I think Zach is gonna do the table thing. He just did a ton of pain killers.

No! No! Okay. I slipped from the bathroom onto the table. I'm going in my room. That makes sense. This is your room. Now that we're done with the table thing,

can you pay us now? I'm just... Yeah, now here's pants, walking around pants money. Thank you. Now that we're done with the table thing can you pay us now? Yeah, now here's here's pants walking around pants money. Thank you. Just 50 bucks each You know, can we take one of these four cereals? Yeah, I guess I guess they are all I just need it I just need enough to go buy a cheeseburger from a friendly neighborhood samurai that sells cheeseburgers Huh, can you it's still okay to go buy burgers there? Honestly, it's not okay. At the time it felt okay to buy cheeseburgers there.

Yeah. These days, the samurai is almost certainly a white man. And it feels strange to buy cheeseburgers from him. The joke is solid that he thinks you should buy cheeseburgers at any time during the day. Yeah. But Zach, I think we can both agree. It's very comfortable to say no fries chips. Yeah, I don't want fries. I want chips.

Exactly. Yes, that's right. And Aaron, come out of your room. These were professional speakers. These were well, that sounds reductive. They are professionals, but they're professional comedians. Just McKenna, Zach Reno, welcome to the show. Wow, can you believe we were pretending to be two Chris Farley's that whole time?

I know, and then we did a really old reference to a perhaps even more niche old-sided-knit life sketch from back in the day. Yeah. There are a lot of rumors on, if you're, I don't know how deep you are on Reddit, but there's a lot of rumors that Chris Farley was actually two David Spades in a suit.

That obviously tracks for me. Yeah. Which is why you only see them together. Yeah, and what David Spade was two Rob Schneiders, correct? Correct. Right. As a nesting doll all the way down. So what that would make one, Chris Farley,

how many Rob Schneiders? Four, four, four, four, four Robs in a Chris. In a Farley. Two, two Schneiders in a spade. Hahaha. Welcome. I should say welcome back to the podcast. We had you on, you were some of our first ever guests. You guessed it in person.

Back in, I think it was like right before New Year's, 2018, I wanna say. It was January 2nd, 2019. Whoa. Yes, yes, yes. So it's been a while. We're so happy to have you back. I don't, I gotta say, at some point we started asking

our guests this and I don't think we ever asked you this since you were so early on. What is your relationship with puzzles, riddles, lateral thinking problems, escape rooms, crosswords to Doku, any of that? Well, I love Ken Ken. No. I don't even know what that is.

Is that the Danish cartoon with the dog? Ken Ken is Sadoku, but it's like equation based. So it's a very similar grid, but it's like use divide sign and then plus sign and one of the numbers will be there. So like it's similar math grid, but it's similar number grid as to doke, but it involves math. I like them.

I don't know that I have a deep relationship with them, but I like puzzles. I like escape rooms, but I haven't done them in a really long time. You have you two ever done an escape room together? Yes. Only one time. It was sort of horrifying for me because I came in late and it truly gave me like an anxiety attack. This was a borderline

work escape room. Yeah. That, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's not quite accurate because it was like a writers room and it was like a fun work thing, but it was like a work thing. And there were like a couple like executives there. And it was like hurting fun work thing, but it was like a work thing. And there were like a couple executives there, and it was like hurting cats. And- There were also people that we did not know there. There were like four other people that just got put into our group.

And I had a really hard time parking and finding it, so I was like late, and so I was like, what's the conceit? And now I need to be in charge and we have to win. I'm so proud. So- I gotta say that's a little while to do. any sort of escape room that's like team building or like a work outing.

To me, it's wild to not book the whole room, but I guess it depends on the size of the room. This was pretty early in escape rooms. This was like 2015, 20, like it was, I don't think it was a known entity to enough of us first to be like, well, there shouldn't be strangers in there. Right. And for me to be- For scale rooms were regulated and safe.

And now it's all, Biden came in and he fucking fixed all that shit. That was before seatbelts and escape. That's right. That's right. I didn't escape room, which is two other people, or three other people in Palm Springs that's, oh gosh, this might be like even too upsetting

to talk about now, but it's Titanic themed. And if you don't make it out in time, you die. Is this, this episode is coming out three months ago, so you're totally covered. Okay, perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect. That feels, that's interesting. So like, it's an all history Titanic one where maybe the Titanic doesn't sink No, it's just like did you get to a lifeboat?

You escape the Titanic you can't get out of your captain's quarters or you can't get out of your quarters to get to the lifeboats And they literally pipe in like screams my idea for our Titanic escape room is better because when you escape The whole ship makes it. Yeah, that's it. But then you have the depths of hundreds on your hands if you don't make it out. Yeah. Sort of a big win. Really high-sakes. Big, I'd take a big swing with mine that I thought of just now. We did you get out of the room? Me? Did you get out? Yeah. So we solved, we solved the whole room and we true, like a bunch of us had grown up in

SoCal high schools that don't have lockers and the last thing was a combination lock and truly only we'd only ever had them for fresh When your PE so we were all like oh how do these work again? So we solved all the riddles but we none of us remember how to do a combination lock So we lost Technically even though that was the last step and we were doing it in time, but we were like, I just didn't know that like spin three times to the right, twice. So we were all like, what is it like we knew the code, but we were like, has this working in?

You have to go like all the way past the second, you know, kids who grew up with lockers, I feel like they have muscle memory where they're just like, it's da da da da da da da da da da da. I had lockers, but I don't know that I could do it now if you asked me to. And maybe you couldn't under the stress of screams. Yeah.

I could have 20 minutes ago, but now that I'm thinking about it, I'm like, uh, uh. Yeah, my wife once asked me, she was like, what's your computer password? And I go, well, now that you asked me, we'll have to change it because I don't know and I'll never get it back. It's gone. It's gone for it. Yeah. So recovery email it is.

Zach, how about you? Um, I, there's a lot of work like, look, I got into the word, all of the bad. I don't, they're probably an app that y'all have played called Not Words, which is very good. K-N-O-T-W-O-R-D-S are great game, a great little little word game that I really like. Yeah, we did, my bachelor party had an escape room in it that was theater themed. I think there was also a wizard one, but that one was booked. So it was a bad thing.

Is it like you're the stage manager and you have to get all the props back on the table? I think there's like a ghost in the theater, if there was a call, and you like me to get out. We did get out, it was good, it was fun. We were pretty fucked up, so it's hard to remember. Yeah, we were not. It was the absolute tamist bachelor party of all time.

And we probably like smelled like meat from Korean barbecue and that was about it. It was a tame evening. I was probably home by like 11. No, but yeah, and apart from that, you know, I love the idea of like a bridge troll riddle. That's like peak riddles to me, you know, I love the idea of like a bridge troll riddle. That's like peak riddles to me, you know? Yeah.

Like answer me these questions three or whatever. There was a time when Zach and I were both pretty obsessed with spelling B, the other like, the other times word game. And I had to quit because it got to a point where I wouldn't get out of bed till I hit genius. And you have to find a lot of words't get out of bed till I hit genius and you have to find a lot of words

Geniuses literally all of them isn't it? Or that's that's queen bee, but you have to like you have to get like a hundred percentage of the words and Really you should like do a little in the morning Maybe and then maybe throughout the day as you have a little time like get a few more Genius should be your goal by the end of the day, but I I my obsession grew to the point where I was like, well, first things first, open up spelling bee, well, can't close this loop to like a genius. I got to prove I'm a genius to start the day. It does sound like one of those toxic male TikTokers of like, I don't get out of bed until I hit genius. Like that sound like one of their motivational things. Dude, every day I wake up and I don't even take on the day until I hit Genius Mode.

Now, looking for me, I got that down to 22 minutes. Mm-hmm. I had a great experience with that app because I never used it, but my wife would play it. And then when she got frustrated, she would be like, well, hand it to me and be like, you finish, and I'd hit like two words, and then it would be genius, and I'm like,

this game rules. Like, I get to hit Genius, I never have to do 80, I have to think of two words perfect. All I wrote was toast and stout. No, it's like opening a jar that someone loosened for 25. Yeah. I'm the strong. It was it was the best. Well, this episode will of course be called toast stout. There's no questioning that. JPC, you are, I believe, old man puzzles today. Yeah, so I have some riddles that have been sent in by listeners of the show. But then also, I, not really a warm-up because this is not really a puzzle or a riddle or anything, but I had an idea for something, so I wrote it down, and then, again, I showed it to Ryan.

She said, well, it's not really a puzzle, but I think it's fun. So it's like, okay, so we're gonna do that. Show for her. Okay. So this is- Play a game that your wife humored you about. Yeah, truly, and Adam, guess what?

Every time I host one of these, that's what we are doing. We are doing something that my wife was like, this is fine. So I was in a bookstore the other day and I don't know how much you all read these but does anyone hear read celebrity memoirs? Hi, dabble. I'm sure I have.

No. I think they used to and then any more if you're online, I think all the best bits are kind of posted online in promotion or anticipation of the release. Oh, oh yeah, yeah. I think it was that way with like the the Prince Harry one. Yeah. Which was the most recent one. It was like clips of it were just everywhere. And it's like, well, you don't really need to read this. But so here's the way that the game will work. I'm going to give you the title of a celebrity memoir. So for instance, I would say spare.

And then you would have to tell me whose celebrity memoir that would. Prince Harry. and then you would have to tell me whose celebrity memoir that would. Prince Harry. Jess, you absolutely nailed it. It is Prince Harry. I was going to say Dale Earnhardt Jr. But if you don't get it, then I will give you some options near it down. So for Prince Harry or for Spare, I would have said, is it A, a bowling ball, B, some ribs, or C, Prince Harry?

Okay. This game scared me, and now I feel a little bit better about it. Yeah. If you get it before, if you get it before you have your options, kudos to you and you will get a point. But then it's first come first serve after you have those options, okay? Okay. Okay, so here's your first official one. I'm ready to win.

We have to do this, Aaron. I'm counting on you to win this. I'm counting on you to witness. I'm counting on you to witness. And I will. Your first one is, don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining. Who's celebrity memoir is that? Mm.

Don't pee on my leg. It's raining. Famous. Dog. Who's R? Famous dogs. Ooh. Is this like Maywest or someone,

it feels like it's gonna be like a firecracker, like someone who had a lot of sayings. This is a person who would say this. I think that this was like a line. Is this Mel Brooks? Ooh, that's a great guess. It's not Mel Brooks. Don Rickles.

Okay, I don't want to confuse you by saying that Mel Brooks is a great guess, but it's not Don Rickles. And then it's not anyone similar to that, but that is a good guest. Is it? Did I find her? Brookes.

Okay, that was a great guy. I'll give you three options. Don't be on my link and tell me it's raining. It's that A, Wiz Khalifa, B, Andy Dick, or C, Judge Judy. Oh, it's gotta be Judge Judy. Judge Judy. It's gotta be Andy. Okay, Alan, you have one point. I heard you for a quirky

saying. Yeah, I think she does say don't pee on my leg and tell me it's right now. That feels like a judge duty thing to say, right? That tracks. Yeah. Okay, here's your next one. Scrappy little nobody. Who's celebrity memoirs? That's not my know this. Nobody. That I know this. Aaron, I feel like you do know this. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, No, I just know that I heard that title and I went, okay. Yeah. Scrappy little girl. I don't think anyone who plays Cinderella and into the woods gets to say,

oh me, you'll scrap me little nobody. Scrappy little little buddy. Who do you think that is? What are the most beautiful people in the world? Yeah. It's been working consistently since he was very young. It's truly just not allowed to be a famous person. You're not a nobody.

Yeah. That's true. All right, here we go. You're the next one. Number four. So it's one to one, Adel and Jess. I do you, on lost, I think it's a Vangeline Lilly, who played like, I forget her name.

Okay. Okay, thank you so much. But I feel like in an interview, somebody was like, what does it like to be so beautiful, so perfect? And she goes, don't just assume I'm beautiful and perfect. In high school, I was called Mousy and I was like, come on. You don't know what an insult is. You've never had one thrown at you.

My book. Mousey little dream girl. Let's not guess book titles. Okay, that's really bad for the game. I'm not going to know this celebrity. Do you want me to guess preemptively what the title that you want to say, yes, please. That's a fun game. Two games in one.

Uh, no, Zach, are you saying that because you just don't think that you know celebrities? That's a hunt. That's not a thing. That's a no. I know that I know celebrities. Is it names, faces are both for you. Hmm.

It's the names attached to the faces. Got it. That's a big one for people just in general. Yeah. Exact fame blind. I see your first. You're fourth one. There you go.

The title is Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing. Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing. Big Terrible Thing. I think we have to solve for a big terrible thing and work backwards. Yeah. Is this like, it's like,

it's like, it's like me, to me, it's like a survivor. Like, maybe a cancer survivor. That was my thought too. Oh, it's a call, it's a call. I will say, well, I don't know, that's, that's quite, I can give you options. Would you like your options?

Yes. Okay, here's your three options. Friends, lovers, and the big terrible thing. Is it Mark David Chapman, Osama Bin Laden, or Matthew Perry? Matthew Perry. Matthew Perry. Okay, so I did hear Jess first. So Jess said it first.

Jess said it first. I know that Jess said it first, because she said it first even to me and we're over on the internet. She's got a, I think friends is the operative word there. Friends lovers in the big terrible thing. And it is about a battling something. Yeah.

And that was one of the ways that I saw it. I saw it in the bookstore that maybe you think that's wild. That's a wild title. Number five, a very punchable face. Oh, Colin Jones. This one. Wow, it's running away with it. Sorry, I don't know what this says about me.

You are, you are glued into the celebrities I guess. Yeah, what can I say? I'm always seeing their books and going, why do you have a book? And also, these people aren't writing these books, right? Like no way they're writing these books. There's, I mean, at Max co-writing, you know, like, CNN's going through, Colin Joseph, I imagine wrote some, you know, a good amount or whatever,

but I bet he wrote it on a tag card. Well, he's a writer. Yeah, but the rest of these people, I don't think are writers, so I don't necessarily know that, I don't even care if they wrote the wrote books, right? It's like, you're not a writer, it's fine. I would like to see a quick scene. Aaron, let's say that you are a publisher. Let's say Aaron and Zach, you're publishers for

Random House and Jess, you're going to be a celebrity pitching a book, memoir, autobiography, whatever it is, who probably nobody really needs to or wants to hear from. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for taking the meeting. And honestly, I wanted to come to you two first. I wanted to come here first and I wanted to come to you two first. Thank you so much.

Do you, can I ask you a quick question? Just like vibe check in the room. Sure. Do you can I ask you a quick question? Just like vibe check in the room sure Do you like the fun sort of like assortment of Nick Max? We put on the desk Well, I would expect nothing less at random house it feels like it's a very random Exactly. That's correct. You're from Corrine now. You never you never know Mm-hmm And that's what I feel like that's why I actually feel like this is the best house or home for me.

And what makes it so hard? Unicorn, sorry, we're random. We're random. Sometimes we just shout words. But what makes a house a home? I don't know what's your book. Let's see if we can find a place for it, you know, on our mantle or in the middle of our bathroom floor. Oh my gosh, that's a perfect place for a book because that's where a lot of people read I've heard.

Um, yeah sure, but we put it on the floor because we're random, not even in like a thing on the side in a nice like magazine rack. Can we ask you a quick question? And this is just sort of like a formality. Who are you? It's been on the tip of my tongue. Thank you. Thank you, Melissa, so much for asking that question. But actually, who are you, though? Oh, is this like a random little joke? This is not a...

This is a random little joke to pretend you don't know who I am. That's very funny. That's hilarious. That's very funny, because two people in the lobby stopped me for photos. They stopped me for selfies and stopped me for ussies. So they asked for you to take photos of them?

No, they asked me if I would take photos for them for their family because they were excited to be in this building, but I knew that really it was because they wanted to take a photo of me as you know, I hosted one season on an on HTTV of a show called House. And it was. Is there a question mark at the end of that show? There is. Yes.

Okay. My name is Kelly Pips and I hosted House for one season on HTTV. And that's why I wanted to come here because the ethos of our show was to come in to spaces that weren't houses and say, but what if this was a house? Okay, and I gotta see, I gotta see a quick first episode, JPC and just co-hosting house. Hi, welcome to another episode of House.

I'm Kelly Pips, and this is my ex-boyfriend. Jerry Pepsi. How are we gonna put houses into places that houses don't go? Come along and see. Okay, so we are here in a abandoned mine in West Virginia. Now I know what you're thinking. Not a bad one. We're looking dangerous. Sorry, we're in the camera crew here. This is an active mine. We're working in this mind right here. And I was thinking, you know, that song West Virginia take me home. That's why this is our first episode of House. Now, I was thinking for this mind, let's go with an open concept. This is not safe. Low out this wall. You need a hard hat to be down here. This big. No, this wall, this is supporting.

No, stop pointing at walls. Y'all, this is a mind. You can't blow out these walls. These are supporting us. Okay, now, is that Canary structural? Or can we get rid of that Canary, say? Canary. Yeah, it's not structural.

Yeah, that canary has to go. It's terrible for the vibe in here. See. Oh, man. It's Kelly Pipsa real name. Well, I was definitely just, was almost almost Kelly Rippa and I was pretty. Oh, yes, yes, yes. I was like, that's a great stage name.

This is perfectly time because yesterday I was trying to find, I went to the Discovery app and I was trying to find an HGTV show that I had watched on an airplane that I really enjoyed and I went through their entire catalog, the HTV catalog, from A to Z, trying to find the name of the show. And I had a panic attack, because all of the names of shows are truly like house. House on top of the hill, house in a near place plot or like the titles of the house. My hill house, my room in the house.

My room in the house. My room in the house. Home in Lake, Lake is where the home house. House Lake house. Lake house. Where the home is. Home and Lake. Lake is where the home house. House Lake Hill. In large terms. I thought that I was like, this is a joke. Someone set this up.

There's no way that. Did you hear it? Did you hear it? Yes, it was at the very bottom. And it was it's called the house. See house. See house. Welcome to the house.

We will be building a house today. Yeah, what do you guys I was like German house house German JPC I saw you take a little note to write make a game out of house shows on discovery app No, man. Sorry. I never say yes. I don't want to play that game The how the name of the show is why the heck did I buy this house? But the heck sometimes the heck is all like Winged things or whatever that's called when it's a swear. So I think it's actually called why the fuck did I buy this house?

That's a good title for a show, HGTV. I would absolutely watch that. The fuck did I buy this house? It's hosted by a survivor winner of a season I never watched. She's from 2012, let me look at that. I think that's in the air. I wasn't watching. Maybe I'm four winner Kim Spradlin. Sure.

Yeah. Oh, you know what? I was just thinking Spradlin would be great for that show. That is such a Spradlin show. We need a Spradlin type. Spradlin vehicle. If her and her husband he has a mustache, he barely speaks. I hate when they put fucking Spradlin type on the call sheet because you know you're gonna get Spreadlin. Yeah, you're just gonna get Spreadlin.

Spreadlin works. Spreadlin works. Okay, we were speaking of other games. We have still to finish this game. Yes, vegetables before you eat your dessert. We're on number six. Here we go. Or five. Or it doesn't matter. Stories, I only tell my friends. Stories, I only tell my friends. you eat your dessert. We're on number six. Here we go. Or five. Or it doesn't matter. Stories, I only tell my friends. Stories I only tell my friends.

Oh, that's good to be like it's another friends cast member. Oh, yeah. I'm actually very mean if I did that. For a second, I truly thought vegetables before your dessert was one of the titles. And I was positive it was Renee Ritzepi from Nova. But that can't be right. Stories I only tell my friends. Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something?

Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something?

Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Maybe like a shock comic or something? Wow. Okay. Yes. You know, like, Dennis Miller. Dennis Miller. Like a Ricky like type. Do you want your options? Do you want your options? I do.

No, wait, before you get to give the option, give us a category. Are they an athlete? Are they a politician? After. After that, male actor. Movies are TV.

Stories that only tell my friends both. Roblo. Roblo. It is Roblo holy shit. Wow. He's had like seven memoirs. Dude, so truly some of these people have had a ton of fucking memoirs. Yeah.

So many memoirs. Is it just like a really like good R-O-I? Like it doesn't cost that much for someone to go straight your book and it sells like pretty good if you're a robber? And then they do the audiobook where they read themselves and then it just like goes, you know Then it just puts them back in the in front of the nation, I guess the only person who had who should have several memoirs and did is Carrie Fisher Period, yeah, Carrie Fisher also. Yes, she did have several memoirs. Okay. Here's your next one. Finding me finding me Albert Brooks.

It is not Albert Brooks. Caitlyn Jenner. It is not Caitlyn Jenner. Caitlyn Jenner, by the way, multiple memorise. Yeah. Nemo. Kee. Is it Kevin Nemo?

Zach is killing in on the answers that I would have written down. No, we just, a different day, but a very fun day. I found Fennish Nemo. Do you have some options on this one? Please. Here are your options. Carmen Sandiego, Waldo, or Viole de Davis.

Carmen Sandiego, Waldo. Oh, Davis. I'll take the point. Aaron, you got a point. You're on the board. I do want to see, I'm so sorry. I do need to see another scene. This is going to be, why don't we have Zach and Aaron and you two are on a date.

Aaron, you were a comments and you go and Zach, you are a Waldo. Where'd you go? Hello? Sorry, thank you for meeting me and this candy came factory. Oh my gosh. I just like to think people on a date, some place, uh, that's busy and full of friends everywhere, and men and women doing work are various kinds, lots of steel girders going up and down.

Sorry. I watch out, we're making candy canes over here, look out! Hey, that guy's kinda dressed like me. You don't realize this, but, uh, almost all candy canes are American made in big factories just like this one. Oh wow, um, sorry, am I making eye contact with you? I keep losing where you are. No, I'm here, but as long as we're asking questions, um, are you an international criminal? What? Me?

You're just, you're wearing a big red trench coat and a big red hat and also Multiple giant world landmarks have gone missing lately. Oh Like what like Eiffel Tower Eiffel Tower is one of them tower pieces one of them mostly towers. Great wall. Okay, I'm it Pairman is gone. Oh Huh, I just noticed you keep answering texts and just texting back. Try a much bigger number. It feels like a... Sorry, I'm not...

Statue of Liberty is worth more than that. This is an insulting offer. Hey, Carl, can you bring some more peppermint oil over here? Yeah, you got it. Another victim! The big tub of peppermint oil! Okay, let me roll it on over. I'm just looking for something easy and fun when I'm in town. It's really hard to connect with me and find me, and I don't expect that this is going to be what that is. Yeah, I mean honestly, I feel the same way I'm always going on dates and constantly getting

stood up and then getting called the next day and it's like I was there. Where were you? I just couldn't find you. Wait, sorry, I am literally looking at a dog with a red and white straight hat. Uh-huh. Yeah, it happens a lot. Woo! Yeah, people can tell me, Waldo, you need to not wear things that make you chameleon-esque blend

into your surroundings around you. But it's all in my closet. Thank you, Judev. You just have a capsule wardrobe of the same four or five things, and I sort of cycle through them. Are you sure you don't want to feel invisible? Wow, you know I never thought about maybe a lot. Hey guys, I'm sorry to do this.

We had another death on the line. Carl tripped it at the candy cane machine and got candy caneed. So everybody has to clear out, well, Oshia comes into your house. So? Sounds like nothing can be done. Look, I hated him too. Oh, so she's been on a date and had to leave the factory.

Got confused by dog wearing a similar hat. So what I said death It's a kind of death. Was it on PBS was Carmen San Diego on PBS? What was that on? I'm looking as a good question as far as I know it was on computer game and that's as that's as much as I can remember. Oh, you never watch the show There's the loot the warrant and something the show is great. Yeah, show is very very good This really made me realize I did not remember the premise that she stole things. Yeah stole like landmarks landmarks like She doing that that's was so great about it. She's like the world's greatest thief. Carman's in there. And I think in the computer game, you'd have to like solve problems

to locate the landmarks too. Correct. Because it would send you to like three different countries and it would be like, yeah, the acropolis is also gone. But that's actually not the problem. You're trying to solve. And that's right. I think the most brutal thing was there was like a map of Europe or something on the floor for the game show and the contestants would have to like stand on a cut, they'd be like, go ahead and stand on Finland and it's like 15 year olds don't know where Finland is or what Finland looks like. And it was just like this nail by inducing a moment of TV of like this is too hard for kids. Oh man, I wanted to be on a kid game show so bad. Like, yeah, but specifically like legends of the hit and control.

Yeah, but I would have was that your number one. That would have been my number one would have been legends for sure, but I also would have been on guts, and I also would have been on. Legends of the hit and temple is the one that if you were too slow, a guy grabs you. Yeah.

Yes. Yeah. Uh, no, I for sure didn't want to get grabbed by that guy. For sure. Unless you gave him a necklace and then he would leave you with a color. Yeah. I also like family double dare where you go through like the obstacle

course of just goo and slime and you'd like big nose. And a big no. Get the flag out of the bookers. It was like so gross and good. I think one of the reasons that one was more popular was because at no point in family double there did a big guy grab you. And I think for kids, it's like, that's way better.

J.B.C., I can't stress enough. The guy only grabs you if you're slow. And the puzzles are not hard. And it's baffling that it is taking these kids so long to put them on the mic. It's so stressful. It's so stressful. It's to know that It's so stressful.

It's to know that a big guy is going to grab you if you're not fast enough. Feet stomach head. Just remember that. Feet first stomach head. Feet go on the bottom, then the head. Then the head.

That's how the statue and all sort of bipedal beings stack up. You know who is feets stomach in a head? A big guy, not wearing much much close who's gonna grab you And I have really bad news for you jbz. They were actually multiple big guys And you didn't see those kids again Yeah, yeah, it was a really long-cuses duration they big Oculus big Sorry, we had a big guy grab all the blue bear acutas, and so they're not in the game anymore.

We're not going to talk about the blue bear acutas anymore. I did think as an adult having love, like, Nick or Kate, wild and crazy kids, other game shows. I did always think that for some reason, shaving a balloon would be a bigger part of adult life. So many game shows were like, there's here's shaving cream on a balloon, and you have to shave it without popping it. And I was like, this is something I gotta learn

at some point. Yeah. Never came up. What was Nick Arcade? I feel like that was when I was trying to remember. It's the what I was just thinking about it. There's like you go into a video game. Yeah, that was the other one that was like what a dream. Yes. Hosted by the the, the, what's that guy's name? Michael something. Doesn't matter. Like the dad from Glee, maybe. Jess, you grew up in California though, right? Yes.

So I feel like these shows, did they film in California? What was stopping you from being a kid? Great question. What was stopping me? I think some of them filmed in Florida. Florida. A lot of them filmed at the next studios in Orlando. And I think I was too young still.

I think they were like 11 year old and I was eight or something. Also, you knew you were more interested in scripting rather than reality? Yeah, I didn't want to get pigeonholed into being known as a personality rather than a performer. Right. But I think that's the real answer is that they were either in Florida and I was like slightly too young. Also, I feel like some of those would just get replayed

on Nick. So there was this like illusion that they were still happy. But like family double dare I think had been done for years, but I was just watching like, old double dare. I also think the guy couldn't grab you if you weren't 12. I can see, we have, we're gonna take a quick break. We're gonna talk you through this, we'll be right back,

and JPC will not be mentioning the guys from legends of the hidden devil. Hey, JPC, you know how I love he looks sleep. I love that he looks mattress brand. Yeah, best nights sleep in my life. I know not everyone is on board yet. So I secured award winning sleeper, Merrill sleep. She's right behind that door. Merrill sleep. Wow, she won the golden pillow for best sleep. That's right. Hey, Merrill. Hello, yes, hello, yes, I'm very well rested after sleeping on my midnight luxe helix mattress. Good to see you. Good to see you. Your naps are stunning. I just wanted you to tell people about Helix sleep how the Helix lineup offers 20 unique

mattresses, including the award-winning Luxe collection. The newly released Helix Elite Collection, a mattress design for big and tall sleepers, even a mattress made just for kids. Yeah, and Helix knows there's no better way to test out a new mattress than by sleeping on it in your own home. That's why they offer a 100-night trial

in a 10 to 15-year warranty to try out the new Helix matches Who do who who did I think you were? I don't know Merrill I'm Merrill sleep and I know everybody is unique and everybody sleeps differently I just Recommend taking the Helix sleep quiz and you can figure out what mattress is right cheap for you I don't know if you're a side sleeper or you sleep hot or cold or if you sleep like me. Meryl's sleep.

Yeah, choosing the right mattress is a real Sophie's decision. But don't just take our word for it or Meryl's sleep's word for it. Helix has been awarded the number one mattress picked by GQ and Wired Magazine. It was even recommended by multiple leading chiropractors and doctors of sleep medicine. Shh. I don't think I thought you were the person that you were talking about.

Who are, what a performance. Helix mattresses all come with a 10 to 15 year warranty, depending on the model. Wow. Stunning. Yeah, look, he looks as offering 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helix sleep.com slash riddle.

This is their best offer yet, and it will not last long with helix better sleep starts now. Go ahead and give her the Academy of Snore. The Snore? Academy of Snore? You know what? You mean Academy of Snore. Glint close to falling asleep.

That's why I got you. Oh Yeah, I got that a lot. Hey, Adel, hey, I got a bone to pick with the two of you Sure, yeah, I wore the skeleton outfit just cuz I figured this was coming. Happy Halloween a few months early It's not yet. What is it? So you know how the two of you? I was like guys I am always so hungry for lunches and dinners and the like and you Jokers told me oh JPC, it's okay. All you have to do is take some, you know, American paper currency tape it to your front door, close the door and then wait until someone brings you food Well, I kept opening the door and the money was gone So I had to take more money to my door. I think you're thinking didn't work at all

Door cash. Yeah, you did door cash. We told you door dash is the number one thing to you With door dash you'll enjoy next level convenience with delivery in the hour making it easier than ever To get whatever you want delivered to your house whether that be back to school supplies or whatever it is that you eat. JPC, which I don't know what you eat. I eat back to school supplies. But what? JPC, all your favorite retail, grocery, and convenience stores are on the app so you can chop everything, your kids, your dogs, your family, might need for back to school.

And hey, personally, just yesterday, I bought some marshes homemade premium quality buck eyes, you know, those canis that are chocolate stuff with peanut butter. I just got those from DoorDash and they were, they were on my porch within 20 minutes. And it's very, very dangerous because they're delicious. Did you fill your belly and your pantry? Uh, yes.

Did you fill your backpack? I did. Okay, well then DoorDash has come again for the gold. I remember distinctively the stress of going back to school and going from store to store to get all my favorite snacks and pencils and pencil cases and all the things that I needed me and my siblings and I remember how stressed my mom was and I know that she would have loved to have DoorDash. So she could be prepared before the big back-to-school day

arrived. So you can stock up with go-to breakfast, lunchbox, staples, and brands that you love. Don't eat my school supplies, JPC. CBC, put that away. Never school. Put that trapper keeper down. Your mouth is too small.

Never been told that before. Shop DoorDash to get everything you need for the back-to-school season delivered right to your door. Order now for stress free back to school shopping use promo code riddle to get 50% off up to $10 value when you spend $50 or more at convenience grocery or retail stores on door dash. That's 50% off up to a $10 value when you spend $50 or more promo code riddle. Don forget jpc because you keep eating those school supplies that's code riddle for 50% off your next order terms apply at all jpc keeps eating my gel pens thanks door cash i mean no that's the one that one didn't work that one's bad hey jpc uh, yeah.

You're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm, um, pranking Adel and I'm setting up a website to prank him. Um, can I just need some advice? This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. I'm not, I'm not mad at you. We're pranking Adel. Squarespace is the only one website platform for entrepreneurs to stay in doubting to see it online, whether you're just starting out

or managing a growing brand. Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website. It gets with your audience and so anything for products to cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms. Hey, Otto, come here. Come here. Come here. Hey, what's what's going on? I actually, I want to prank GPC, and I want to set up a whole website to prank him. Do you have anything that like, is there like an online store that could set up on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace, you can have custom merch.

You can easily sell custom merch and create passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production, and inventory and shipping are handled for you, saving you time and money. What is happening? Okay. Wait, what's going on with that all? Oh, nothing, nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal

Squarespace website, not a prank thing. No, he's gonna tune you. And I'm gonna use analytics. Use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool. I'm going to improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my Prank website.

Prank's a tool of me. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for? I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. Prank. With Squarespace.

You can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party tools prank. With Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party tools to extend the functionality of your website. Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, Vattle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine. Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com

for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh she's back she's back. Hey Aaron can we go to grandma's house? But how? I don't know. All right, we're back. We have circled up with our legal team. I won't be talking about anything else that I shouldn't be talking about anymore for the rest of the episode. Or a guy will grab you. We were related to any property or trademark or network, just a guy will grab you. We're related to any property or trademark or network just a guy will grab you just a real grabbing guy.

Agro Greg. Agro Graff. I always that they had that feature on game shows like Jeopardy. Be like, okay, you're getting pretty low on points just so you know they get a twelve hundred means a guy grabs you Just like a daily double which is just like and this is the one more a guy grabs It would be funny to have to answer trivia under like duress With a guy creepy towards like three steps close Easter Island Okay, um, it was we're still playing this game, so this is your next one. I don't know what you know me from.

Confessions of a close star. Jess already said it. Yep, it's your point. No, no, you knew. Judy Greer. Yeah. Okay, you both split the point. You get half a point each.

Yes, you already said Judy Greer. Okay, here's your next one. So that happened. A memoir. Oh one. So that happened, a memoir. Oh boy. So that happened. So that happened? Is that David's paid? It sounds like someone's sarcastic.

It feels like David's paid. It feels like a reality start to me. It feels like, not a reality start, I'm gonna say not a reality start. Is that the one by the guy that lied about being in the Twin Towers during 9-11? You're gonna have to be more specific. Are you talking about what Steve Renzisi is that the guy's been in the league? I think so. Yeah. No, it was not. This is not a Renzisi. I wonder if Renzisi wrote a memoir. It's insane to write a memoir with the thing that people know you from a slug about that. Well, that's

the vibe that I'm getting. Is this the title of like someone did a bad thing and this is them trying to like capitalize on it? I, yes. Didn't Brian do that where he was like, I was a nom and a chopper and then they're like, Brian Williams was never close to Vietnam. Yeah, I think it was like Afghanistan. I think it was like, as a reporter. Yeah, I got you. Got you. Uh, I don't even know if this person did a bad thing. Steve Bartman.

Are you ready for your, I mean, I can give you options. What's the options? So that happened in memoir. Is it Mark David Chapman, Osama Bin Laden, or John Kreyer? Oh, John Kreyer. Osama Bin Laden. I just, is that like a famous line? some of it, Ludden. Oh god. Or John Cryer. Oh, John Cryer. Oh, John have been laughing. God, they're kidding.

Is that like a famous line of his? Did John Cryer do a bad thing or was he just around Charlie Sheen for a while? I think that's probably what it was, is that he's like, he has teen fame and then he gets to be on this mega sitcom that gets imploded by Charlie Sheen's winning Tiger blood phase.

Right. And he's just bearing witness to these big moments. I think he's more like, he's like the forest gump of people of that age who's just like, well, I was there as the brat pack. I was also here during this sitcom. I didn't do anything that wild, but I watched it. Mm-hmm.

Even before you set it, the speed with which the phrase tiger blood flew into my brain. Same. Yeah. I was like, oh, right. This was all any of us were talking about winning. Yeah. I think it's fair for him to say so that happened

because like, he was really close to that. Yeah. I want to say a quick scene. So we're going to see a scene in an office. Adel, you're going to be playing a character whose name is Charlie Shawne. And this is around the same time as the winning and the tiger blood stuff. And you are really trying to capitalize on that, even though it's just that you have a very similar name. Okay.

So we need another volunteer to, uh, yeah, right here. You want to wait to hear what I say Charlie I do I want to I want to know with yeah Charlie want to let me say the rest of what yeah go ahead we need someone the whole thing Charlie we need someone to to meet the Bloomington team at the airport to greet them to bring them back for the oh I live like like a like 10 minutes away I'm happy to do it. Yeah, that'd be great. I'll do it. Oh, my dad's Michael Sean. Okay. Well, we don't need to know who your dad is Charlie. I'm just, we're having the big summit with all the branches and I just wanted someone to greet the Bloomington team at the airport.

You're not dealing with a dad, Charlie? Yeah, it bears repeating. You're not dealing with a dad. Who's your dad? Hey, guy, who's your dad? You never even met my dad, Charlie. So the Charlie said the fuck up hey Gary why are you sitting so far away from the rest of the table you sound like far yeah it keeps language this is a professional setting sorry yeah and Gary can I say I don't get it I don't get it at all there's like a woman with a beehive hairdo and she's talking to a cow in one panel.

I don't get your work, man. Okay. The farce. Charlie, you're gonna have to unpack what you're talking about. Oh, you're making a farce about what he's doing. This is Gary. This is Gary Lorson, right? Oh, yeah.

Not the cartoon, it's Gary Larson. Yeah. It's not the same. It's not the same, Charlie. Okay. All right. Uh, and Cheryl is is didn't go hike the PCT Okay, she's not Cheryl's straight. She's Cheryl stay you da okay, so stop stop assuming that we all have Celebrity allegories. We're just focusing on the big summit of all the branches Bloomington's coming in and I want to make a good impression

the big summit of all the branches Bloomington's coming in and I want to make a good impression. Yeah, I don't know if you saw my t-shirt says Cheetah piss. It's kind of my tiger blood. Charlie, that's really inappropriate for the office and I would never let you greet Bloomington in that. Does anyone remember how good Bloomington did hosting last year? The pressure is on. Their legends will never live up to them. I thank you so much for the ride to the office, I cannot wait to see what you have for me today. I'm really excited about this. We're just so excited to have you after you hosted us with such grace and warmth last

year. Let me just go ahead and open the door to our office. Oh no. Charlie, get down from there. Charlie, get down from there Charlie get down Yes, he's been up there with a bunch of teeth balloons and he's just screaming grinning over and over and over Running I also got a job offer from random house. So I don't Leave Charlie absolutely speechless. David, I'm so embarrassed.

I'm so sorry. This is nothing like the warm welcome and many Sharkootary platters that you had for us last year. This is wonderful. What? I see what you're doing here with the teeth balloons and the freak out. And something that smells like... I'm gonna take a wild stab

Is that Cougar piss? Close, how did you know it's weird that you know? It's cheetah piss. I can't have it. How'd you get it Charlie? Charlie I hate giving into it all, but how'd you get it now this other guy I hate this guy you should fire What's your name Gary why are you so far away? I can't get closer This guy almost cost you the whole fucking deal My heart breaks for Gary You'll be fine. Gary well, no way

He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine.

He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine.

He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. He'll be fine. Here's your, we have two more. Behind the wand, the magic and mayhem

of growing up a wizard. Is that the guy who ever played Draco Malfoy? Tom Felton? You got one, yeah. Two points, yes, Tom Felton. How did you know? I feel like I've seen it somewhere. I feel like it's the moment.

He also feels like the right level of one of them who would write a memoir. Like I don't think, I don't think. Who would you get money, right? The main three, it would either be like him or the kids play the twins. Yeah, yes, yeah, I don't know that I could have pulled the name Tom Felton. I don't think I ever knew that that guy's name was Tom Felton. Yeah, I mean either I looked it up. At all. Oh, can we do that? Can we just type in the name of the book and look it up?

At all. Oh, can we do that? Can we just type in the name of the book and look it up? Is this no rules just right over here? No, I'm here the night. Open book test. So, I'm, wait, here's a trivia question, since I get to invent games two in the middle of it, for everyone except for Jessica who knows the answers to that.

No, he's brand has the, has the, had at one point had the marketing, no rules just right. Ooh. That's not the outback steak. Is outback steak house. The question is why is it outback steak house? No rules just right. It's just to create like what do you talk your restaurant?

What are the rules? No shirt, no shoes, no problem. You got on our podcast and I had a great time. I don't know if you guys have been to the Outback Steakhouse in Burbank recently. I have. You have not recently pre pandemic. I have. It's great. All right.

What is it? Blumenon you're awesome blossom. What do they have there? They're blooming on you. Yeah, think about it for a second. Yeah, you know. It's gotta be blooming onion and awesome blossom is chilies. That's correct. No, okay. Okay. I think there was a study. Can no onion truck off?

Yeah, absolutely. They have no onion based app that I'm aware of. No, yeah, I don't think so. No famous one. Just I got to hear about whatever the study was. Oh, I think there was like a bit of information that came out like, you know, when you have like the, your parents have the news on in the background and you're like, I guess that's a fact that I'll now stay in my brain forever.

It was like researchers have discovered that the awesome blossom is the worst food for you. There was like some sort of like perfect high fat, high calorie and no nutritional redemption that they were like, this is the worst food. I want to say it was like 6,000 calories. Yeah, something, it's something while we're at like, it's a real bar. It's absolutely no sense for you to consume it. You'd be better having like a snickers or like a piece of chocolate.

Like there's nothing in it for you. I heard and I don't know if this is just amongst candy or Whatever category of food, but that someone said Skittles are like I don't know if it's like the worst for you But it's like the worst thing you can put your body that like won't leave like elements won't leave I heard the hardest for the hardest for your body to cross that's what it is. Yes Skittles are being reviewed to see if they qualify as food. I'm going to go. I wasn't ready for this much bad news all at once.

Are there people who think Skittles are food? To be fair, taste the rainbow is an open-ended soda. Yeah, but it's like gum, you're not supposed to swallow. If I am hungry, I'm going to chop my body. Are you telling me you're in my body? Are you kidding me? I'm not like in the street. I'm going to be in the street. I'm going to be in the street. I'm going to be in the street. I'm going to Are you telling me in my body? I'm spitting them out? Spitting out? Spitting out?

Are you using it like a backhoe? Not like in the street. I'm doing it in a trash can. Can you see a scene where we're in a dugout of a baseball game? Yep. Okay guys, it's the bottom of the six. I need everyone to start getting really serious, okay? Puh. You got a coach. I'm ready to coach.

I'm ready to coach. Put me in coach. Coach, you got it. Blood, skills. No, they're red, no, they're red vines. We're chomping on this, fitting them out. Red vines, red vines. Mine's blood coach, mine's blood.

I'm doing those pink school erasers. What the hell did I wait, what? Okay, you know those are racers? The big ones. Now the ones on the ends of the pencils the big chunky ones yeah chunky ones hey coach I know I'm on deck do you mind if I run back in a locker room I put a Charleston chew in the freezer oh my god all right actually now's the time for this I want to talk about our dentist bills they are out of control. Oh, coach, come on. Come on, coach. Come on, coach.

Come on, coach. Come on, coach. What's the plan to what's the point of being a little league team with excellent dental coverage? If we're going to get yelled at for our dental bills? Coach, I have a suggestion. I don't know if anyone hates this, but what if we all just stop going? Would that be, I'd be fine with that, honestly.

No, no, I can't do that. Jimmy, I love my dentist. I always get a little parachute man when I go and be good. When I go and be good, I get a parachute man. When I went and be good, I got a goldfish. And on the, the one hand, I was real excited about that. But now I got to take care of a goldfish. You got a real goldfish man. You must be good.

I was pretty good. Every time I go, I get get it's like a piece of paper But I can ride on it and then lift up a real thin sheet and it all resets and everything disappears coach It all disappears. That's good. That's good coach. Please don't take these away from us Take this away coach. Please. I might have to coach. I tell them I have anxiety and they give you as annex They write you a prescription for one's an a team should you be playing in our league still I feel like you're older than us. You're Tim you have stubble. Tim are you supposed to triple A? But Tim don't get me wrong.

You're pitching solid 70 miles an hour. Yeah I just want to know because I want to get to know you. Please don't let everybody shut up about Tim. He's fine where he is. He's the reason why we keep winning. And little league and I'm under four feet. So that's I should get to stay no matter what. And he's the reason we have an underarmer sponsorship. Thank you, Tim. Thank you, Tim. And Timmy technically has the least amount of cavities. Yeah, he's eating and chewing on things that aren't technically food, but all of you, how many cavities did you have the last time we went to the dentist? 16 plus two.

Why are you saying it like that, Beanie? You said not to say the number, you said not to say the number 18. Yeah, you said don't ever say that or reminds me of my ex. And also, two of them were on the same tooth, so I didn't know if they counted the same

DANG My ex was a baseball player. It is not it's number with 18 and he died. I'm sorry coach. I'm sorry coach But coach I got so many parachute men for being good I go be good and I get 16 plus two cavities. I Switch to red vines and said skittles but the red vines they still stick to my muller something awful coach even though I'm spitting them out all over this dugout careful don't slip. Alright we're I'm making a call right now we're switching to chew into backo as a team coach coach if you tell them you can't swallow the

pill they'll give you gas. I love you, Jim. I love you, Jim. Just be sat next. And will you be my dad? Tim, you gotta go. Tim, I'm here now. Yeah, I got kids. I can't have more kids.

I got a child's port up by ads. Okay. Sorry. Here's your last one. Here's your last one. And then of course in the last five minutes of the show, we will get to a rental. Uh, what's your relationship with riddles now to some memoirs?

Here's your last one. Yes. If you ask me, and of course you won't, and the end of course you won't is in parentheses. You ask me and of course you won't. Is this like can you ask me? And of course you won't. Wow, that is a fun want. Is this like can you ask me? And of course you want. Wow, that's a, that is a fun guess.

It's not Ken Jennings. Is it a game show host? It is not a game show host. Although they've had a long career. I don't think they ever hosted a game show. If you ask me, and of course you won't. So this almost sounds like, uh, what was the one OJ made was like, if I did it.

If I did it. This kind of sound like this. Is it, did Mark David Chapman actually write a book? This might be like a trick to save to the end. Mark, is it Mark David Chapman? I think you wrote Ketcher and the Rye, or I think that's just skimmed the Wikipedia article. All right, I'm ready for options, I think. Okay, here are your options.

Mark David Chapman. Oh, Chase Simpson. Or Betty White. Oh, Betty White. Betty White. Aaron, it's Betty White. I'm doing the math here. I don't think anyone had a chance of winning besides Jess.

Why would you? You got it. You got it. You got it absolutely correct, Aaron. That's sweet, Betty White. But I feel like a course of people, a bunch of people want to ask her. Yeah, that's a weird title for Betty White. I don't get that title.

Sure, title should have just been like, yep, I love you too. Or like, back in the scene Olaf. Or like white Noah noise with Betty White. Yeah. Or like scrappy little nobody. Yeah, Betty you like me a lot. You say scrappy little nobody with an ironic photo and I'll be like funny, Betty, you're

in on it. I think Zach is on the right track because so many of these celebrities did have like little pun based names to their to their memoirs, but they were unfortunately ones that just gave away who they were. Sure. Okay. Just in case nobody heard it, I believe Zach said, uh, what was it? Betty, I know you love me white.

I was, I bet you love me white. Yeah. I bet you love me white is very good. That's why we called it. We have to get this. We have to get this rental. This is from Jake and South San Francisco. South San Francisco.

Go ahead and give us the cardinal direction if you're from a big city. It's nice. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there.

We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. We did it there. A treasure buried when you're born. Soon dug up and daily worn.

Ten years later, sell the store, wait a while, and dig up more. Worthless beads have carefully stored, the price of diamonds have ignored. Past along to sons and daughters, hers are her fathers and his, his mothers. Ancient heirlooms carved from bone, a tool, a jewel, jewel a hammerstone what am I

birth certificate I gotta be it is birth certificate that is all the time we know that's not he's being an asshole I say I think I blacked out after I heard bird yeah what's the first word? Eyes. Eyes is not the correct answer. Jeans? I don't say that.

I love jeans. I love the jeans because hers are her fathers and his mothers. Yeah. I only hear them. My mom's dreams. Um, are we allowed to hear it again? Uh, yes, you are allowed to hear it again. Is the audience listening loud to hear it again?

Are you gonna believe this whole thing? This will be bleeped for them, uh, or everyone will have to just hit that 15 second skip, uh, button. So yeah, they will not be able to hear this, but here it is. And treasure buried when you're born soon dug up and daily weren't and daily worn 10 years later sell the store wait a while and dig up more worthless beads of carefully stored the price of diamonds if ignored passed along to sons and daughters hers or her father in his mother's ancient heirlooms carved from bone, a tool, a jewel, a hammerstone. Teeth.

It is teeth. Wow. I love that. Thank you so much, Jake from South San Francisco. I honestly, I have a bunch of hurdles prepared, but I picked that one because I was like, hey, we were just talking about teeth. That makes sense.

I collect my dad's teeth. So I should have gotten that way faster. Like baseball cards, right? Do we know is that is that out of the genetics behind teeth work? Do you have your, you get your mothers? Do you know I think that just happened to be what they got?

Yeah, I think we could do the little square of the genes and stuff, but also I think you, it is, you can have like a mixture, like you can get your, your father's shape, but your mother's like spacing. Ooh. And if you were, was that real? Sell the story.

I mean, you can get like the pal, palette part can be from one, you know, like so your smile won't necessarily be identical to a parent. And you can dig them up 10 years later or whatever you want. Like I think I've got teeth anytime. I've got my mom's shape, but my dad's softness.

I really have had a shit ton of cavities. Ha ha ha ha. Did you really get parachute man every time you went? If I be good. Ha ha ha ha ha. So I'm done every time. Tell her your biography. And why don't we go around starting with just,

let us know if there's anything you would like to plug her promote and also let us know the name of your autobiography. So Zach and I have like sunset at our weekly release of our podcast off book, but hey, if you haven't heard of it yet, there's 300 of them. And you should check out dropout TV where we have a musical and pro show called play it by year. New episodes out every other Tuesday. I think upon your listen, maybe there's three out, get that little subscription, check it out. Dropouts got great content through and through,

and we're super proud to be there. I think I get a text once a week from a friend being like, have you heard of dropout? You should get a subscription. I'm like, I gotta take this out at some point. Oh yeah, I mean, try it out. Give yourself like a little month and then binge some stuff But they make really just a lot of really fun stuff with a lot of people that you know and some people you don't and

It's they just invented their own TV channel essentially. They're just a mini streamer making content for the fans and just in a feedback loop That's a little more like great. We actually know what they like and we make more of it. That's great. I know. No, thank you. I'll stick to Netflix where I can watch stuff that I hate. Yes. Yes.

Is there a cake equivalent on dropout? There's no cake equivalent yet, but I should pitch that to them that they need to get to get into the cooking space. Everyone needs their cake show. Yeah. Zach, anything you'd like to plug or promote? Yeah, exactly what Jessica just said. Our podcast main feed off book, by the time you were listening to this, I think it's all out so you can listen to it there.

But now what we're doing on that feed is we are slowly beginning the development of a whole musical. So if you want to join us on that journey, now actually is a great time to jump in. So I mean, that just and I do professionally and are now sort of like documenting the process of. So that's what off-book podcast is at this point. And it's a fun, new and exciting time, starting with an absolutely insane thing. So yeah. That's so cool. Congrats. That's amazing. Every listener of this show's ears just parked up. Uh, aren't anything to plug or promote?

I want to plug their new show on dropout because clips of it have been popping up on my TikTok. My algorithm really knows how much I love you guys. And I extend. I'm excited. So blown away by it. It's looks so good. Um, thank you.

That's, yeah, that's also, that's great. That's a great way to like sample. If you like the vibe of dropout in general, that's so good. Thank you. That's also great. That's a great way to sample if you like the vibe of dropout in general. That's really sweet. Thank you. And then also check out sitcom D&D if you haven't yet. Our season ends this week, I think, for next week. So a good time to jump in, I think. Adel anything to plug. Yeah, a few quick things. One, I finally saw Spider-Man across the Spivers. What an incredible feat of cinema making. That was just outstanding. Can't we to watch it again? Also, one of my favorite things I've ever seen is an immersive show called

the Burt City put on by Punch Drunk Theater. We went, second, we went to sleep no more at some point, right? You, it was a You it was a Zaidan. I was there. Yeah, not me. Yes, it says. But it's yeah same company same concept as a huge warehouse full of spaces and Greek mythology and all these theatrical amazing moments. It's about to close in September. So please check out the burnt city.

If you haven't already, it's one of my favorite things I've ever experienced. It's in London. And then the last thing I'll plug is I had a whirlwind trip to New York City where I saw a few musicals and I would recommend Kimberly Akimbo, was really outstanding, parade, and then Aaron and I saw Josh Groban in Swinney Todd and I would recommend that as well. And Ann-Analy Ashford. Ashford gave one of the best performances I've ever seen someone give in terms of physical comedy

and what she did with her voice. And yeah, just fantastic. So check out those shows if you are in New York. Well, that's awesome. I do see anything to plug her from up. Look, I got to read a five-star review written by one of our listeners. If you want to get your five-star review featured on the show,

just leave one. And then maybe I find it and maybe I read it. And as an example, today I'm going to read Asaphord. They were, I love podcasts. Podcasts are a great form of entertainment. They're little audio stories fed directly into your ears whenever you want them. Some are funny, some are dramatic, and some are neither. My favorite podcast is Drinkin Geek Out, where four friends review craft beer and talk

about the things they love. This is the first person who plugged a different podcast in the review, but guess what? It's all fair, baby. It's all fair play. So if you want to do that, I guess do it. Uh, and maybe check out that podcast that I won't say again. In case he says I honestly don't think it's the first. All right, well, stay a little idea as a forward, someone beat you to it. Get in, uh, Hey, Riddle Riddles reviews and tell us five star review for your favorite

other podcast. Get in there. Yeah, or other than show or as long as you get those five stars, five stars, you can leave a five star review of anything in there. You can find your own podcast. Yeah. Tell me your favorite episode of of off book in the Hey, Perkertle iTunes reviews.

Please. Oh my gosh. And Aaron, I got your advanced copy of your memoirs, which I really loved. Would you mind sharing the title with The World? Yes, it is scrappy little Jupiter. Bye forever. Hey, real, real.

Created by Adolf Refei. Bye forever. I am a week our game is and I'm a week no more The guys grab you I couldn't grab you how I can't even remember did they did they like violently grab you like I mean they made it seem that way they kind of like bear hug you and yeah They just like put their arms, but they were so much bigger. But I feel like they maybe told the kids to sell it, you know, because the kids are like, yeah. Yeah. And they sort of like drag you off screen.

That's so. It's also such a little kid like sensory memory is being afraid of that part specifically. I think I was more afraid of Olmack. Olmack to me was terrified. Yeah. Oh, no, I liked Olmack. I, you know, Olmack didn't bother me

because he couldn't grab you. You couldn't touch you at all. He was a face on a wall. Hey there Cosmo knots and astro nuts. If you like that, you're gonna love this week's Patreon. The Clucru goes to outer space. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com such here at Overtul by joining the Clucru for $5 a month. Or can listen to that plus our entire Batcadilog at patreon.com such a riddle rental by joining the

crew crew for $5 a month or you can do that 7 day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month. And get those ad free episodes. See you there!