Hey Riddle Riddle - #267: Tub Gin & Flagons w/ Joe Lepore & Christopher Hastings

Episode Date: August 30, 2023

After about 2 years, we are finally rounding out our collection of the Rude Tales of Magic cast members. Can't get enough? Then also check out the Rude Tales of Magic Patreon. Or, if you're feeling especially horny for podcasts, check out Oh These, Those Stars of Space! and the Oh These, Those Stars of Space! Patreon. And don't forget your copy of InvestiGators: Agents of S.U.I.T. Featuring: Adal Rifai John Patrick Coan Erin Keif Special Guest: Joe Lepore Christopher Hastings Editing by:  Casey Toney Theme by:  Arne Parrott Logo by:  Emily Kardamis & Emmaline Morris Want more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon! Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & prints Want to mail us something?  Hey Riddle Riddle  6351 W Montrose Ave #267 Chicago, IL, 60634 Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531) Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgun podcast. Alright, that gives us everything we need, so have fun. Thank you, Casey. Thank you, Casey. Thank you. Sometimes he doesn't give us permission to have fun, and it's really hard. Oh, it's just rough. It's brutal.

The doctor was the mother. He stood on a block of ice. The physical fish. It was the head end of an airplane. He sat in with the doctor. And the horse was a big Friday. I said, I'm ready to win. I said,

I'm ready to win. I said, I'm ready stupid, I'm not stupid, I'm not stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid, stupid, I Riddles are bad. Isn't that sad? Mommy and daddy are crying. Upstairs in the attic. Mommy, daddy, won't you read me more Riddles? It started out rhyming and then it... Said mommy. Stopped.

Said mommy again. Maybe it's like a complicated rhyming scheme where it will all rhyme eventually, but it has to just get... It's like an A B C D G A B C D G. Said, Dad. Wait, are we in this book? Explained, Mom. I'm an animated character.

What are you? Oh my God, am I? Why am I? Hey, from my perspective, you look like a human woman. And as they stepped out of the pages and entered the Chicago library during Adorify's children book reading, they started to dance and scream and dance and scream and gas. We can't breathe outside the book. You didn't draw us.

You didn't even put in the clothes. For animated characters, we're meant to breathe oxygen. And so they died on the floor in front of the kids. We had a wake. Welcome back to Hey Riddle Riddle. I know you were on the floor in front of the kids. Yeah, I'll wake welcome back to Hey, Rito Rittle. I know you were on the news for a while. Yeah, did you see? Yeah, it was horrible. Yeah, I got me.

Now it's the Gaga. I had so many copies of my book return for refund. And I am, whoo, it is exciting. You killed your characters. Thank you so much. You killed your characters. They always say kill your darlings. You do or my darlings, so it was, it was truly easy to kill you.

You know what? You're one of my darlings as well. Oh, Aaron, anything you'd like to say to me? Hi. Well, hello and welcome to Hey, Riddler Riddler. Uh, you know, that's Adela. Aaron's over there.

I'm somewhere in the middle. But we have more than that on the show today. We are joined by two guests, Christopher Hastings and Jo LePore. Welcome to Hey Riddle Riddle. Woo! Hello, thank you for adding us to your collection of root tales cast members.

I think this completes the collection. At this gosh. You haven't done it. How many Tim Plastodraft to open up before you finally got that Jolla Like 80 Oh We got a whole graphic Tim Plastod Yeah, yeah, that's great

Yeah, a couple of years from now the resell value that's gonna be insane. Yeah, you gotta encase Tim in Plastic to really like Keep that resell value pure you want want a 9.9 template. And it only took us, I believe, three years to collect all the individual members of Routils of Magic. So any other podcast out there that are looking for a challenge, three years is the number of years to beat. The clock starts now. is the number of years to beat. That clock starts now. Clock's ticking podcasts. Okay, so the thing that we always ask, every other member of Ritail set have been on the show.

Chris, why don't we start with you? What is your relationship with Riddles, Puzzles, Lateral Thinking Problems, Edelhamms, Gavreux, Logic Trap, Crosswords? I remember like a friend had a book of Riddles and Lateral Thinking puzzles that I really That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out.

That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out.

That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me out. That'll help me room. I think that's fun. It was really thrilling to go into like one for the first time

and be like, wait, what if I flip over the rug in here? There's a big number on the bottom of the rug. Like, yeah. Yeah, that was neat. And then you put that number in a box and then, you know, you get out. That sounds like a terrible escape room. Yeah.

So, your time was one minute, 14 seconds, you're the last place. Yeah, and they said it was bad. Yeah, they said most people get it done way faster. We have absolutely found that there are a limited amount. There's maybe 50 good riddles in the world. A lot of other riddles are either variations on that or just absolute nonsense.

So it's nice that you discovered that early on. And if you ever find that book that you had, we would absolutely love to see it. Yeah, yeah. Call your friend, reconnect with your friend. We need that book. We need that book. 30 years.

Yeah, the canon of riddles is very small. And you gotta know, there are points in history. You know riddle writers were like, champion at the bit, when the first time a woman became a doctor. Yeah. Yeah, you know. They were like to the lab.

I think it was actually like a law, Isaac Osama for something where it's like, they theorize about in the future in 25, women will be doctors and then it came true and they're like, we were just doing riddles. We were choking. Now the riddle is like, it's like, I can't fly this person on my plane.

I'm not there. I'm not there. Exactly. Joe, how about your relationship with riddle? Yeah. I'd like to think strong. I'll admit, I haven't listened to every episode of Hey Riddle Riddle.

So I don't know how often this comes up, but I had an early relationship with Riddle's via the game MindTrap. Oh yeah. Y'all ever hear about MindTrap? Shadow in the rest. Yeah, yeah. So that was really my introduction to Riddle's. And we, there was like,

I feel like there was a, like when I had chicken pox or something, just burn through all those riddles in a straight go. I was also thinking about before we started recording, a few summers ago, there was a Labor Day weekend, we're Chris and I. That's every summer. I'm sorry.

No one of them has to be like the Labor Day weekend to you. Fair. Fair. We're Chris and I that's every summer. I'm sorry Fair This specific Labor Day weekend Chris and I and a few other people were in a house in Vermont and There was a book of lateral thinking puzzles. Oh, this book was nuts. Yeah, we were met at each other early insane Okay, forget what we said about that last book. I have several mint condition Tim plaats that I will try to you if you can get this remark. Really.

Oh, man. It was a really good one. I think we did want to go back to try to get it, but the person that rented like just like just on a mission to get that book. Like out, but the, um, the, the person who rented the property, I think, just was not well suited to having other people stay in her farmhouse and it's off the market now, you. No, I do remember the person who booked it like,

really liked that house, but this woman just hated every Airbnb guest. So he went back several times and every time had to have a different person book the house So no like we were lovely guests, but she just like You know always found a reason to be annoyed at whoever we took a door off of its hinges It was already off its engines folks can I tell you we didn't I totally thought for a minute there Chris you're gonna say that we tried to go back to get the riddle book and that house

I thought it could be like a little shop of horse or like yeah situation where it's like the old man who sold us that air But I love that it's just like we want try to go back and that person hates guests. Yeah. No, it's not like it's like they haven't put riddles in books in 30 years and put riddles in books in the years. Can I ask a question about this, Ritalook? Because you both had a very strong reaction to it, but I didn't quite get through context. Was it very good or was it super weird? Like what was it about the book? It was all lateral thinking.

Okay. And it was, yeah, some of them were just really confounding and we would pass it around and we would flip to a different page. And everyone would try to a different page and everyone would try to just like, suss out what the solution was with yes or no questions. And there was one, the one that like sticks most clearly in my mind was like, the solution was Italians had t-shirts with a diagonal stripe to make it seem else.

We did it. We did it bug. We did a bug. Okay, one final question. I think we have to move on. Was this book blue? JPC, do you have a copy of the blue book near your desk? This might have been, I keep it in my proof safe. I'm sorry, not if I approve safe. It's a safe that if my house burns down,

it's the only thing that goes. It's like a reverse if my house burns down, it's the only thing that goes. It's like a reverse black box. It's a safe made of tissue paper. Yes. Well, you know what? We don't have, we don't have riddles as good as Italians wearing t-shirts with stripes on them, but we have some listener submitted riddles today. And every once in a while, when we have people on the show that have any sort of D&D affiliation or actual play affiliation, I like to scroll through our emails and see if I can find people

that submitted riddles from their Dungeons & Dragons campaigns. A lot of people do like home brew riddles as GMs. We're running short on those, so instead of that, I found someone who remembered a riddle that they heard once at a rim fair. I was so close and... Because there's a lot of dangerous chemicals in those home brood rentals.

You could die from that. Yes, you have to make sure your yeast content is right in your home brood rentals. Exactly. I always want to do a D&D campaign that's tub gin and flaggans. And it's just people running me in China is like back and stuff like that.

If you write it, I'll play it. So Wizards of the Coast, if you're listening and we know you are, Tub Gin and flaggans. The other thing that they would do with that information is give you a cease and desist. Yeah. I don't think this person gave us permission to use their name because this was back in 2018 before we asked for that. So I'll just say this is from BW. BW says, there was a riddling booth at my local ren fair.

It was made by a bearded, bespectacle dude in a pointy hat who challenged people with rhyming riddles. Here's a quick one that I actually remember. I just got to stop. I just got to pause for a moment and really highlight the riddling booth. Yeah. Yeah. And I hope that seems.

Oh, please. I love the guy, like he's just shouting from that booth. Like put that guy in any shop and that is going to drive up your customers. Like, yeah, exactly. Have either of you, and Aaron, I'm not sure if I've asked you this quick. Have you been to a rent fair? Adela and I went together, so I know that we have. I went for the first time this year,

and I absolutely love it. That's right. That's right. I haven't been. Yeah, I mean, either sad. And we're classic dorks. Yeah. I love it.

We really should. We're dorks in the classical sense. I'll shout out if you're in the Chicago land area, the Bristol Renfair, which is like two hours away, or like 90 minutes away, up by the Wisconsin border, the person who just the theme song for our show, Arnie Parrott performs at that Renfair,

and this riddle, and by the way, bearded and bespectacle dude at a pointy hat, totally could be Arnie Parrott by the way, but this strikes me as something that you would put right at the front of the Renfair to really give people the idea of this is a thing that's going on when they're like walking in through the front gates. Yeah, for sure.

Um, but here we go. Here's this riddle that this man shouted at BW. Riddle, come riddle you, Varlet, skirted round in scarlet, stone in the middle, stick for a tail, answer this riddle without any fail I don't know is is that This like your Stone in the middle stick for a tail. Oh, yes, caramel apple Uh, that dude that is a great answer and I answer it's it. It's not quite a caramel apple,

because I think something does make a better answer than that, but you're thinking on the right way, Adel. What is a violet? Oh, I think I know that is it a cherry? Wow. Do you know, the answer is a cherry, Adel, but did Violet get you there?

Yes, it's... I'll look it up. As someone who once walked through Princeton's campus, a violet is a type of mouse. It's a not quite a varmant, not quite a harlot, but something in between. A man or boy acting as an attendant or servant. That's what I said. Or a dishonest or unprincipled man.

That's wild because it's just valet with an R in it. And that kind of is the same thing, right? Like a valet. A rascal. I definitely got it. So it's like a valet with a mustache. Yeah. I definitely got it from like,

pit in the middle, scarlet, and then the tail. But I was thinking, stick for a tail, made me think of like a, like turrid stiff member, but, the cherry, a cherry, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, but cherry. A cherry, Stan is a little more flexible. I do wanna see a scene. Christopher, you will be a booth at the very entrance

of a Renfair, you're the Ritalman, as you're known around the Renfair. JPC, sorry, let's do Aaron and Joe, you are two guests coming to the Renfair. JPC, you're dead What's a plug? I just lost the part that easy You're a couple entering the ren fair You're cut you've never been before and you're not sure what to do with this real booth or what what exactly you are supposed to order or get at the booth

Welcome you vagrants and carpet baggers. I've got questions for thee. Let's go home. Yeah, I don't know. I tried. Honey, I tried. I want to go home. No, no, I have to agree.

I just have to agree. Thank you. Yeah, that's it. That's what I'm here for. It's a vibe check. Some people love it. Sir, sir, I'm sorry. Do you have those big turkey legs?

Oh yes, but first you must answer my question. You...butler. No, you're right, you're right, babe. We gotta go. We can't. Oh, the big kinds. You can get a Disney world, but they're here outside of your home town. Wait, hold on.

Jeff? Is that you? I can't tell under the big beard in the hat. Oh, um, yeah, this is, um, this is what I do on the weekends. I'm, uh, you know, I'm like, I'm just, I'm the check guy for, uh, you know, if you're in the mood for this particular brand of silliness I mean this is Jeff my boss. Hey. Oh Jeff. Yeah, yeah, you know, I it can't be all accounts all the time sometimes You know you got to guard the door listen. It's worse than me in there. That's why I'm here. Oh, that's great No, but I'm into it now that it's you so we're ready. Oh We cut we cut to Jeff at work. He's a, Adelaide is going to be playing a potential client at Jeff's accounting firm.

Honestly, we love everything about it. This is the tour is fantastic. I just think that this is a little too buttoned up a little too stuffy for us. I think we're going to have to go with a different firm. Nothing against you, it's just that. Yeah, we're not trying to be violets. We're just, we just want to stop around

for the best sort of fit. All right, you know, I do a thing on the weekend that is generally off putting to about 60% of the people that encounter it, but no offense, I don't want to interrupt you, but there's, I don't think there's any possible way you could change our mind about this it's just a vibe that this place has it's a vibe check we came in and we did a vibe check and it's just

so worth it so worth it I think I could hold out an eight-foot tall pointy blue hat with star set up my desk and place it on my head and pull my mustache episode well then if you want my business so splendid, then you'll answer my questions upended. Damn get the car, damn get the car. I can't, I'm hypnotized, I had it so tall. It's so tall. It's because it's full of my secrets

or answers to my terrible questions. Here's one, three times eight. It's been so long. I love this guy, the guy who's just doing math problems. But he has that voice. Yes, math is the worst riddle of all. It's very cold for us. No, no, no, divergence. That might as well be. I want to see Jeff laying someone off.

Yeah, in that voice. That would be brutal. You were very promising candidate, but I have to say, in the manner that you arrange your spreadsheets and files, you are quite the vagrant. I mean, answer me these riddles three. Pack up your stuff, turning your badge. Uh, not riddles so much as a command.

We do have another riddle. And this one is more of a Dungeons and Dragons riddle. Thank God. It's by a person. Yes, so you guys, what a relief. You didn't have a leg up on that last one. Addle, Addle, Addle had the leg you didn't have a leg up on that last one. Adel, Adel, Adel had the leg up there.

But now everyone is on equal playing field. Um, okay. So this one is from Kevin. Kevin writes, you come to a heavy stone door in front of which sit two sculptures of ogre women standing on pedestals. On the door. On the door. In ogresh is the following inscription.

Left, lady, left, left, open. And then I'm going to give you, there's four lines and I'm going to give you the line break. Okay, so here's the first line. Left, lady, left, left, open. Line break. Left, lady, left, right, closed. Line break.

Right, lady, left, right, open. Line break. Right, lady, left, right, open, line break. Right, lady, left, left, close. Okay, this is either the contra code for infinite lines. Yeah. This is like an ogre reinterpretation of Bob Dylan's lay, lady, lay. Okay.

Can you read the inscriptions? Again, I'm gonna write them down, so I don't need it. Aaron's writing them down. And you know what, Aaron, why don't I do this? Instead? I'm gonna write them down so I don't Aaron's writing them down and you know what Aaron why don't I do this instead of everyone having to write them down I'm gonna throw them in the chat. Oh my god. I'm talking. I never use the chat But I'll do it one more time. It's left lady left left open left lady left right closed right lady left right open right lady left right open, right lady left left closed. Can you turn these statues into what? The turn. Not turn them. I don't.

I'll play the statue. And you try to turn me. No, I know you, nothing, I don't think it involves turning the statues. I don't think you need to turn them at all. And what we're trying to accomplish is opening a door. Yes. So there's a heavy to accomplish is opening a door. Yes. So there's a heavy stone door in front of you. Two sculptures of overwomen standing on pedestals.

On the door in an overwish is the following description. Um, the, you, you don't need to turn them, Aaron, but they are, you can pick them up. These statues are able to be picked up. JPC, pardon me, coming through, excuse me, sorry, it's me, Randolph the White. I would simply speak friend, the word friend in Oga. Oh, that's not working, let me speak friend in Oga. Let me see if I have my keys, no way. Just drop them.

Get the hell out of your man. Sorry, sorry. Oh, by the way, Wizzy says hi or whatever his name was. Get out of here. Is it that the, do I, can I swap the statues? You can swap the statues. You can pick them up and move them around. If I swap the statues, what happens?

Technically, if you just swap the statues, nothing happens. Yeah, you're not doing anything by just moving the statues now, but did it affect you live over the room? The function way is a little off and everyone's mad at you, but no, say anything. So it's fucked. The vibes are fucked. There's two hints here. And I'll give you the first hint.

It says, the party wizard passes a perception check and notices that the two statues are mirror images of one another. And then it says, the party rogue passes an insight check and notices that the two statues are mirror images of one another. And then it says the party rogue passes an insight check and realizes that the third word of each line is a verb. Left. Sure. Yeah. Here. Left lady left open.

Here's a question. Are the are the statues. What are the statues hands doing? Um. Not important. Are the statues, what are the statues hands doing? Not important. It doesn't say, so I'm gonna assume that they're on trailer. Yeah, yeah. Ogres are a very religious bunch.

I will also say, I think that a good hint here is that this is like in Ogres, and I feel like Ogres is a very like, it's not like a flowery, it's not like a flowery, it's not like a romantic language. It feels like a very, I've made you do it in college. I feel like I know what it's all about.

You don't need to explain it to me. I know. I think that's a little more doubtful. I do want a JPC based on you saying Ogris are religious people. I do want to see a quick scene. JPC, you are a, you're the leader of sort of an ogre church, whatever that might entail. And then the rest of us, the other four of us are sort of members

in that congregation listening to this sermon. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, sits, sits, kneel, sit, kneel, no stand. God up, double down, ogre, middle, ogre, mid, not bad way like kids say. Just here. Eat man, eat man. Eat man, eat man, eat man, eat man, eat man. Eat man. Um. Eat man, eat man. Ogre, think. Good thoughts. Be happy. Ogre, think bad thoughts.

Be. Bad. Hungry. Hungry. Hungry. Think man, think man. Think man. Think man.

Think man. Think man. Think man. Think man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man, eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man.amb. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man.amb. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man.amb. Eat man. Eat man. Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man! Eat man Eat man Eat man! Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man! Eat man Eat man! Eat man! Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man Eat man wife. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Ogre good. Oh, oh. Uh, Ogre, um, Ogre take worship, uh, two false idols.

Ooh, that actually... That actually good for Ogre. Anywhere we take ship. We, we good there. Checking, ogre joking, ogre joking, eat communion, body of ogre. No, part of... No, no. Ogre, no, eat, ogre. Og no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Okay. You said you can move the statues? Yes. Can I move? They don't have to be on either side of

the thing. Do they? I can move the right lady to the left of the left lady or something like that. Well, they're on pedestals. So it's like pedestal pedestal statue statue. And you could pick the statues up off the pedestals. And just switch them. Yes, but I don't, switching them is not exactly what you wanna do. I give up. Yeah, and there he gives up, which is your right.

I felt really good about the switching them, but. Yeah. Is the, is the, you said it's a giant rock that's the door. Is that what you said? The boulder or the rock? Yeah, there's a door. Is the door? Yeah.

There's just a door. Okay. Do we know, is it like a double door? Like, is there a left partition and a right partition to the door? Or is it just one door on two hinges or something? I don't think that matters, so I don't okay. I don't what know how to answer that. It's not that's not the solution here. If we want to talk about how to take a door off of a hinges, I think we're going to have to talk to about Christopher and Joe. Can you come over later

and help? Obviously, obviously these guys are old pro kind of pros. I mean, I was like, I was like, AirBnB. If AirBnB is listening, listening, we've never taken a door off its hinges. I mean, and those weren't even ogre statues at that Airbnb. Completely different statues that were moved around statues. So left is a verb. Right, so the left lady left will left the left open. So I guess I could give you the answer here. So there are two ways to open this door.

And it's in both there in the four lines of instruction. So left lady, left on the left side is open. And then the right lady, left on the right side, is open. So you have to take one statue off of the other side in order to open the door. I see. Now, look, I don't speak Ogreish. It's not, it's, I, Aaron, I didn't go to fancy Ogre College like you. So, Ogrelin, nice. If anyone can beat it, you win. I'll then owe you five dollars if anyone can beat Ogrelin. So think about it. Okay. Uh, uh, no, no no Gare Dame now. No, it's not over. You do it. You're trying to beat it. Yeah. I guess, yes. Yeah.

If you beat it, then you keep the five. So that's jacking up his defenses. Uh, so we thank you, Kevin, for that riddle, even though it was very, very fucking difficult. We, we have another riddle and this one comes. I don't necessarily know that this is a riddle from a D&D campaign, but it's adjacent, because this is a riddle from the Bible. That was a minute to us by Shane. A adjacent. But adjacent?

Well, look, they're both from books. D&D is from books. We have to admit that. D&D from book? If you ask me, I think that whole dang book is a riddle. Ah. Ah. Ah.

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Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. This is a it's submitted by Shane a real riddle from the Bible. It's found in the book of judges chapter 14 And it's a terrible riddle says Shane But he also says that the scripture lets you know it's a terrible riddle

It just in the context of this so Here's the riddle And this is a riddle that applies to Samson, which is the guy. Oh sure. He had you know Hair hair hair Delilah like a panting commercial. He's a yeah. He's the guy, oh sure, who had, you know, the hair, his hair, Delilah, like a panting commercial. He's, yeah, he's the guy from the panting commercials. He had the Samson of the shower. No, that's the herbalist's commercials. So, Samson, so he's Samson, said to them,

out of the one who eats came something to eat. Out of the strong came something sweet. So that's the riddle. Can you read it again? Yeah, yeah. Out of the one who eats came something sweet. I'm sorry, Jesus Christ. I completely fucked that up. Out of the one who eats came something to eat. Out of the strong came something sweet. to eat out of the strong came something sweet. I have an answer but I don't want to say it. Aaron you are so close I want to say with maple syrup. That's like that it feels like a adjacent to the answer.

Bees. You're now you're closer. Sweet bees are made of these. And I did my part of the relay race so now I'm. So Aaron got maple syrup and bees. So, get anyone bring this one home. Good oil. Look, fellas have fun.

Is it oil? What would a bees maple syrup be? Honey. Honey. Oh, right. Honey, milkshake. But I think I got it with bees. I don't know, you did it.

You didn't say honey. Oh, so milkshake. So milkshake wins. Samson then followed up with saying like, sorry, let's see, I'm really way better at just slaughtering Hunters of people with a job. Like, yeah. Samson said, does he want to be the bag of four skins?

I have. I'm just a Philistine four skins. If that's, if God told me to think this. I don't know if that was Samson. I think it was like a king he was trying to impress, was like screwing with him. He said, yeah, get all these four skins idiot. That feels like something that you tell someone to do

that you just never expect them to do, yeah. I guess the way this, the answer is on the way to the town, Samson found a deadline with bees living inside. Oh, man. And he ate the honey out of the dead lion. And he did not share the dead lion honey. It feels like, and I think we all know my Stan Sarma, legend, but I will say that's a pretty cool D&D monster. A lion who like roars bees. It feels like the Bible is like the original monster. Yeah, that came straight from Yahweh's mouth.

God, lion. I do want to see a vaccine. Adil, you are going to be, and it has nothing to do with the lion that roars bees. That's just a cool idea that gets to live on the internet for free. Thank you. You are going to be, you're a person who showed up to

a party, the rest of us are going to be kind of at this gathering. Aaron, let's say you're hosting the party. And it's a potluck, but you obviously brought something that is like from the trash. And like, it's pretty clear that what you brought is from the trash. Knock, knock.

Kevin, oh my gosh, come on in. Thank you, thanks. Gorgeous house. Just gorgeous house. Thank you, yes, we put a lot of work into it over the last year. How do you afford, sorry, that's a rude question. Yes, we put a lot of work into it over the last year. How do you put, how do you afford, sorry, that's a rude question.

Where should I put my dish? Yeah, okay, yeah, just put it down. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I thought you personally just anyone in this market, totally, no problem. Just to the table, what do you make? It smells, it smells, yeah. Should I put it on the table, or I guess it's,

I mean, what's the point first refrigeration at this point but Oh, hey Kevin trashes in the kitchen buddy Very funny Mikey I wanted um what did Mikey get here? He said he was picking me up Let's see what it oh no. I'm seeing looking around the table pineapple upside down cake. Whoopsy. Dupsy. What did I know? It's supposed to be upside down. Oh, okay. Yeah No, no everyone sort of like made whatever their specialty was guys Kevin's here. He brought something I When a slowly back out the door. I think I read your invite wrong. I brought

out the door. I think I read your invite wrong. Ibrach lifts up a big metal lid. I brought a potassium. That is a possum stuffed with a rat and I don't want to say the third thing. So I am going to slither out out of this party. No, no, I'm sure it's great. Do we grill it? We got Mike on the grill. Do we grill it we got Mike on the grill Mike? Any more room on the grill Yeah, but is Mostly for like burgers and dogs. I was thinking like like burgers and dogs Any room for a rat What's up possum stuff with a rat stuff with them? Do you grill a potassium? I mean are my ears deceiving me? Have you all forgot

where you came from? Living in this nice $50,000 house or however much money it costs. Kevin, I'll eat your potassium. I still remember the old waves. Are you sure? The third thing that's stuffed with his Benadrill is that are you gonna be okay? That makes two of us. I have to stuff myself with Benadrill to come up to this fancy city slicker house with its $50,000 China silverware. This is my great uncle and he begged us to come here. I'm not interested.

He's got one of those old-timey pajamas on with the butt flap. I haven't I've only seen those in like cartoons and stuff Yeah, this is from a cartoon Oh It's actually you too. I think we'll get along great. I'm gonna go back to the party I prefer not to be left. Okay. How is it going? Grandpa, hey, let's not talk up here. Let's talk in the basement where we can be free and wild Hey, let's not talk up here. Let's talk in the basement where we can be free and wild. Rather not go to the second location.

Never go to a second location with the grandpa. He outweirded you, Adel. I like that it was called a potassium, which is another thing. Like, that's, you know, that's a mineral. What does that have to do? Could it just been a bunch of bananas? Yeah, I was very quickly trying to think of like, what's the turduckin' but with like a possum? And then I was like, I have to say something and work back.

You did it. Well, we all go our separate ways to think about what our ideal turduckin would be. We're going to take a little break and we'll be right back with the answer to that rental. What would you put in your Turduckin? This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Hey, I'm Ellen JPC. Don't freak out. Sorry to crash your vacation. I know I wasn't invited, to crash your vacation. I know I wasn't invited, but I need some advice really quick. Okay, we were enjoying the old cars in Cuba,

but whatever you have to say. I'm looking to do online therapy, just to talk about my path in life and myself the steam. And I needed to be online, convenient, flexible, and suited to my schedule, and also affordable. Aaron, we knew you were gonna do this better help. We knew it. Better help, that's what you need is better help.

You need better help. Ooh. Yeah, and if you would excuse us, Adela and I are going back to watching Cars 2 in Spanish, or as you would call it, the old Cars in Cuba. Okay. Hey, just also, I just have to feel like a brief questionnaire to get matched with the license therapist, and I can switch therapist anytime for no additional charge, right?

Yes, it's how it works. It's absolutely best. Okay. We got to go. Thanks, Sarah. And I love it and have used it actually before. And I know you guys were going to say that because I it's like perfect kind of therapy that works for me. It's so nice to be able to message my counselor anytime and not have to drive or like build up all this stuff that I want to talk to her about and yeah, it's the best because it's entirely online Meaning you don't have to come into our house. Yeah, yeah, it's designed to be convenient and flexible and suited to your Oh, is this cars? I love this movie so Aaron it sounds like you know about better help You like better help you've used the service you know that you can do it from your house and yet I love it. Here you are, watching cars do in Spanish with Adeland Marrano, very expensive vacation. Mojito, Aaron Mojito.

Mm hmm. So let there be your map with better help. Visit betterhelp.com slash riddle today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help. H E L P dot com slash riddle, R I-l-e. Wow, look at all these wheels. Aaron, we missed the best part. We're winding it. Don't they esponial for cars? Hi, I'm Ellen, JPC. Oh, greetings. Greetings, Aaron. We're just... Hey, Aaron. Our normal selves today. I'm just myself, I'm normal. Hey, we're more normal. Good.

Good news. So I finally opened Aaron's land in my backyard. It's a theme park. Most of the rides work. Most are pretty safe. And I'm trying to start a website. So people can find out all the information they need to get into Aaron's land.

Oh, that's actually perfect, Aaron, because this podcast is actually sponsored by Squarespace. Oh, perfect. Yeah, and it's an all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs or whatever you consider yourself to be to kind of like stand out online, whether you're just starting out, which it seems like you may be,

or you're trying to build a successful growing brand. So, where space is gonna make it really easy for you to create a beautiful website, Aaron? Yeah, and Aaron, if you want Aaron Land, I think is what you call it to have stuff like Custom Merch. You can do that. You can easily sell Custom Merch and create a passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand. You design your products and production, inventory shipping, all of it handled for you,

saving you time and money. So I mean, real quick, just because I'm looking around at Aaron Land, I'm just gonna see what say what I think Aaron Land is from what you're presenting. Sure. So right now it looks like Aaron Land is a lot of goo. Mm-hmm. Great eye. Okay.

So I'm right about goo, so it's a lot of goo. So Aaron, are you trying to sell this goo? Because if the goo is for sale, then Squarespace does have an online store. We can sell your products online, whether it's physical, like this goo, digital, like I imagine, you know, some digital goo, or photos of people seeing the goo for the first time.

Yeah, Squarespace has what you need. It has the tools to start selling online. I'm looking forward to using it because I can use insights to grow my business. I can learn when site visits and sales are coming in and coming from to analyze which channels are most effective. You can prove my website and build a marketing strategy based on your top keywords like GU or most popular products and content like GU. It's kind of eating through my shoes it's starting to burn head to

Squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Aaron I just got some great analytics from Squarespace. It says people don't like goo. Yay! I'm in a lot of debt now. I have something to say. Oh, everyone gather around, Aaron has something to say. Here you here you, but for the beer. I want to talk about my favorite app on my phone, Rocket Money.

Oh, we thought it was gonna be pardoned. Barevis, some sort of, we want barevis. No, I wanna tell you about Rocket Money. It is my favorite finance app I've ever tried and used. I used it way before they ever even emailed us to say hello. I was a huge fan. So I always subscribe to things to get like that one week free trial. Yes. And then spoiler alert, I forget that I did it. And then I get charged.

They will figure out what subscriptions I have, but I'm not using and they will cancel them for me. I love them. Excuse me, time-traving lady who came back here to Old England. I have a question. Most people think they're spending 80 gold on their subscriptions like I have with my Baker and with the Hens when in reality the number is closer to 200 gold So it sounds like when you're signed up for so many things and ye old England like Streaming services, which of course like is when you go in the stream It seems so easy to lose track of what you're paying for with a peasant like me. Hard to be a peasant from the past when you know so much, huh, Adel?

Well, it's my future. Rocket money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, which is very helpful to me. I got an email today that said large transaction detected from them, and it was a vet bill, but if someone had to told my card, it would have been awesome to know about that. It helps lower your bills all in one place. P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P $720 or gold, I guess is how worth they gonna put it to also say that it is dollars a year and just to clarify I'm in my present Yeah, right yeah, yes sure though. I'm from the past but you're in the past and you know stuff I you probably have taxes in too because that's the only thing that's consistent But whenever I do my taxes rocket money also helps so much with that because they color

code, all of your expenses and where your money is going, it helps me keep track of things. I love it and I can't recommend it enough. So stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and manage your money the easy way by going to rocket money dot com slash riddle that's rocket money dot com slash riddle rocket money dot com slash riddle I think this old man is broken okay so we have all voted on our favorite of the tournecans. The winner is the co-coron, which is corn stuff with corn stuff with corn.

So would anyone like to admit to being the one that wrote that one down or everyone's just looking around at each other? I mean, they're good. It's good. I mean, I will admit that my submission was the Coca-courine, which is corn stuffed with cake stuffed with corn. And I will admit that mine was Cokaburn, which is James Coburn stuffed with coke and coke cake. And I'll admit that I can't think of one. Yeah, right, you wrote Cokorine.

That's course, sir. All right, well, no more of this to duck in nonsense. We have to get to another riddle. And this one is coming from Jeremy. Jeremy writes, I did not come up with this, but I think it's pretty clever. Hopefully, I got the wording right. Jeremy, I also hope you got the wording, because if not, I don't want to look like an asshole. Here's this riddle.

More of. Sorry, more of an asshole. I'm sorry, Casey, can we put that in a hurry? Because I keep forgetting to do that. And it should be, it should be more of, it should have, yeah, you're, I mean, you're just right. I should be more of an asshole. Tune in to our his art thieves decided to rob an art museum on the night before a big, new exhibit opens before the break in. They put on foolproof disguises. They disemble the alarms, allude

the guards, and make off with some priceless pieces without being caught. After the police review the security footage the next day, they immediately go and arrest the two men in a tree of the art. How did the police solve the crime so quickly? This is like video surveillance. Is that as easy as that? Or they disabled the video surveillance? They disabled the alarms. Okay. Specifically, they disabled the alarms, allude the guards, and make off with some priceless pieces without being caught. Sounds there's some sort of disguise that would clue in a clever observer. Here, here's... Christopher is on the right track.

I think I've got it. I think I've got it. It was a, it was an exhibit of, uh, Van Gogh portraits. And so they did like very intense, um, like face and body makeup to like make themselves look like impressionist, uh, you know, paintings. And so they just had to find like the two guys walking around. Yeah. Who had like thick brush strokes.

Ha ha. And you know, it's a blue. Yeah, your profile said that you looked like a painting, but I've never really met a person before that looked so much like a painting. I'm missing an ear. I don't want to talk about it. That's a great guess. But Joe, but that is not the correct answer. But it does have something to do with their disguises. They put on foolproof disguises is literally in the riddle. But if they're foolproof, how are they caught? They're guards. They dress up like a different shift of guards. They thought it was gonna be different guards on shift.

So here's the thing. Here's the thing. The important thing to remember is that the police immediately arrested both men and they got the correct men. Yeah. Ah, the thieves were men. Oh man, the museum,

they is only island that wonder woman is from. That's actually been the answer before on the show. How crazy is that? Honestly, four people should use that island to write Seth or Riddles in because that is a great answer. The foolproof disguises were cops and the cops just had to be like, those two guys aren't cops. We don't recognize them.

But then Joe, how would they know who to go get? That's the thing. It's not just like, ah, these disguises don't fool us of these people taking these paintings out of here. That's what happened. Go ahead. No, it's to cops, it doesn't matter.

So cops just resid to people. They say, we absolutely got the right guys. And that was it. It was over. I like, I think Joe said, Docent's, I feel like Docent's would be a good disguise. Because even if you brought a group of people to help Rob, they could like hide the party.

Okay. It's the group or something. But it's said to you man, so I guess. Do we know what kind of exhibit it was? No, and I don't think that does not necessarily matter. That's not like the red hearing. It was just a expensive, big art exhibit. Yeah, okay. I have some clues, would you like some clues?

Oh, yeah, please. Okay, so the first clue is the men were arrested in two different locations. The second clue is they were disguised as specific people in the third clue. I guess maybe I should just be listing all these clues. No, Joe, please. Is one of them, is it that they dressed up as the artists

and the artists are dead? That's, no, it is not that. Damn. Sorry, it's being agreed. Just coming back for my work. I said I could come grab it anytime. It's me caveman. It's me French caveman. Sorry, but these didn't become valuable till years after my death. So I'm just coming back and getting a little bit of my. I like the CSE. Christopher, you are a dead painter or ghost of a dead painter coming

back to a museum to get your art and GPC, you're the security guard who's trying to figure out what's going on. Whoa. So this is what they call me now. The painter of light. Very nice. Excuse me, sir. I- you just walked right past my desk. I- I kind of have to come in after you. Do you have a stamp? Do you have a reentry stamp? But- but this room is my entire life's work. Look at all these lighthouses. They came from my mind. I- I'm- yeah, in fact, I can just check to check to see your, oh, oh no, your, your hands, I'm so sorry,

I didn't, you must have a condition or something, it's, I didn't mean to, did you get a ticket? Do you have a good app? It, proof of purchase that you can, I may purchase no longer, I am come from beyond the grave the condition I have here sure you will also come to you Now I'm just gonna have to turn solid for a second and I just want to grab this one I know I've seen this one being talked about a lot lately in some really high profile Executive sweets I've been haunting and the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the He's dead, we're friends. We're friends where the ghosts go. You know, it's funny, we actually haven't named it. All of your names for the places we go, we die.

Wrong. But I'll allow you to find out. All right, I'm not the, I have to get this painting. I've been kind of bunch of times where I bunch of different ghosts. And it's always me, it's always, it's always, oh, I'm in Corpereal. Can you help me get off the wall?

Can you take it to my car? I'm on my third strike so it's I'm sorry mr. King Cade. I'm sorry about your death Excuse me. Are you behind the desk there? My name is Tony Rosetta Stone. I'm looking for something I Something I created years ago Man come on. I need this job. Okay He is a goal Man come on. I need this job. Okay Look we both know how this is gonna go you're gonna do your whole thing You're gonna get me eventually. I'm gonna help you get the Rosetta Stone out of here Please I'm just begging you don't do it. Hey, I'll go but you will be visited by two more go

I'm gonna be visited by a bunch of ghosts you guys must talk you guys must know I'm gonna be visited by a bunch of ghosts you guys must talk you guys must know For a guy Your final clue the men were arrested at their homes Addle you got it, but it was not an accident. These two thieves were not partners in crime. They were bitter rivals and each one had the idea to disguise himself as the other in order to frame their rival for a crime. They were the same times.

They both accidentally picked the same night because it's like Ocean's 11. There was a big fight that night. And so all of the valuables were like the most money ever was held in those, you know, or maybe it was like a first Friday thing. Where all the art is just like out. You're, you're clue about them being arrested at their homes gave me a different incorrect idea, which is that the, that the art they stole were like monumental sculptures. They just had a jet coons balloon dog in the backyard. That's their defeat tall.

There's a 20 foot by 30 foot brick wall with a Banksy on it, emerging from your chimney. I do want to see a thing. The disguise flawless. I do want to see a scene. Aaron and Joe, you are two bank robbers who showed up to the bank at the exact same time you are rivals and it just so happened that you both decided to rob this bank at 3pm on the dot. I think I

think we could just split it. You knew I was gonna be here you do this I mean listen I look I look at the Google calendar I look at the cool calendar for criminals And I see that you put it down a bank robbery and I think well it must be it must be as you know a sweet prize if you know other people let you know You make up a good point you and and I, we used to work together. And now, it's just muscle memory. I share with you on the Google calendar when I'm in a B places. Do I miss you? Of course.

Do I hate you? I don't know. Yes, of course I do, I think. I miss you. But we can't be together anymore. You only hate me because every time I say we split the heist money, I double cross you. That's the only reason. That's a good reason.

That's a good, I'm not going to cry in another bank robbery. Oh my god. We make a cry every time we do this. No, I don't. Listen, I could be better this time. I could be different. No, no, no. And I know that I've tried to like kill you and steal your identity

and like do all these things, but like... You did face me off. Yeah. I did face off you. I did begin to love that movie. We love that movie. We love John Woo. We love John Woo. In the best movie ever made, face off.

Whatever. You know what? You do this job by yourself. I'll set this one out. I'm gonna go get Dougie donut and have fun Good luck. Are you are you gonna rub that talking? Donuts? I'm not gonna tell you putting it in my Google calendar I had to imagine several dubs flying out of each of your yeah, yeah, dubs everywhere and dubs everywhere I don't think I ever need to watch that movie again. I'm gonna put that into the universe I think I've got insane and same take it. I think that's planning for one life. That's plenty To put a cap on any Nicholas Cage movie is a fools errand Plenty to put a cap on any Nicholas Cage movie is a fools errand

Yeah, Aaron and you're not even you're not even a quarter the way through your life I'm assuming you're going to be 120 years old More years to enjoy that movie I think you're you're you're counting yourself out too soon. Okay Okay, so we have we have some more riddles here Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. So we have, we have some more riddles here. This riddle is submitted by, oh, they actually just asked to go by their Twitter handle, which unfortunately in 2018, there still was a Twitter. Now there's just X. So I don't know if you're still on X at Brilliant, but that's like, it's like, William with a BR. Brilliant. Let's assume they're on blue sky.

At Brilliant Elon Musk, stop trying to make fetch happen, please. Brilliant, please feel free to email the show again to tell us what your current social media is five years later. And I will try to update on a future episode. Just Casey go ahead and add this disclaimer and I will not be doing that. Here's their first rental. The better I'm built, the shorter I get, but build too much and you're as good as dead. So add to me till you can't know more with, and this is an all cap, Jots and Liz 4 by 4. And Jots is J O T S and Liz is L I Z.

James, is this still a D&D riddle? Unfortunately, we are all out of the D&D riddles, and we are scraping the bottom of the bucket with just regular people off the street riddles of this. Is it just regular, garden variety 2018 riddles? See modern riddles. These are some vintage pre-pandemic riddles. This is what William was going to work with the flu, you know what I mean?

Yeah, pre-pandemic concerns. Oh, yeah, the answer is vaccines uncontroversial. For emphasis. Do you want to read that one more time? I like that. The better I'm built, the shorter I get, but build too much and yours is good as dead. So add to me so you can't know more with Jots and Liz four by four. I don't know if people are familiar with Jots and Liz, I certainly was not. There is a hint that Jots and Liz are not acronyms,

anagrams or things of that nature. Oh, that is useful. I really thought it was. Yeah. And I was getting mad about trying to put them together different. They are seven letters that represent seven things in the answer.

Yeah. that represent seven things in the answer. Yeah. Hm. Uh, Chants and Liz. The last hit is the answer is from the Soviet Union, and you've almost certainly interacted with it personally over the past 30 years. Oh, the Tetris?

It's Tetris! Wow! Christopher, can I ask, did you watch the Tetris movie? Yeah, Jots and Liz did not come up. I haven't seen it. I've only seen the previews a bunch of times. So, there's a lot of what a Jots and Liz stands for. Is that like the types of pieces?

I guess so. I think that, yes, the Jots and Liz are the J.I.J-L-O-S-T-Z are the pieces of the blocks. This is like the shorthand for the way that the blocks are oriented. The tetraminos. Yeah, Chris just knows that off the top of his head. And I have said it in multiple podcasts before I'm the Tetris guy. I'm not very good at it, but I do know one fact. He does know the Tetris lore. The deep lore of Tetris.

Look, obviously the Apple TV like home screen has not done its job for this Tetris movie. But do you recommend the Tetris movie? I think the first act is a lot of fun. that it's job for this Tetris movie, but do you recommend the Tetris movie? I think the first act is a lot of fun. Okay. And no, it's, that's a great, it's like, they tried to make a thriller out of a story that's largely about the right forms getting signed or not. Okay.

Okay. My favorite kind of movie, I love forms. Yeah, I like to see. You know, there's a lot of Dutch angles on people walking down hallways very quickly, but it's like, it's like, who's gonna get the contract for Tetris? This guy or this guy? You know what I mean? I mean, it's interesting basically like trying to, it's, it's essentially trying to like

do like sell something out of a country where nobody can sell anything. Like that's interesting conflict, but that's very similar to how I felt about the Air Jordan movie. I'm like, it was a movie, but I guess it was kind of about like a specific day at an office. Like, yeah, it's good, but we're just, we're now at a point where like you have to sell a movie with IP in it. Well, I mean, not anymore. Nobody sell movies anymore, but it has to have IP, but it's

where there's no more IP that's like interesting. So we just have to like do things that are just kind of normal things. Yeah, it's weird to root for it's weird to watch a movie where they're forcing you to root for a company that ends up making $45 billion. Right. Right. I guess this is good that this happens. I'm dying to see the movie about coming up with Happy Honda Days. I'm just a shitter on that. Hold on. Hold on. I want to see a scene.

Now I do want to see a scene. So this is like, we're going to see clips from the trailer. And this is going to be the trailer for the Happy Honda Days movie, but it's like, this is like a rated R suspense thriller. Mm-hmm. Are you seeing this? Lexus, December to remember, they're eating our lunch.

I've always said Honda should be so multiple days of the year. That's our key sales tactic. In 1972, one man revolutionized the car industry. Hey, you know I'm just the janitor, but uh... Yeah, we don't need your ideas. Fair enough, fair enough. I just wanted to wish you were happy, Honda days. I'm sorry, I mean holidays. And a janitor with an idea.

Before the whole spicy Cheeto thing. Hey, hey, stop cleaning that toilet. Say what you said to me again. I know I'm just a janitor. No, no, the other part. Huh, happy, haunted days. You're spending too much time at work. Don't you care that our son is at war?

Based on a true story. Honey, I don't know when this turns into a horror movie, but it's gonna take a turn very soon. Focus on that. A janitor doing their civic duty. If we're gonna present this to the board, we're gonna need to get you out of those overalls. A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha all the characters turn to the camera. Very good. That's very good. That would make me laugh. Yeah, if it was a comedy, I would like that. Oh, that's really good casting. I like that.

I worked in a court in Civic, and I was like, I'm all out of fond of brands. Makes. Let's do one more riddle. One more of these riddles. It is, okay, here we go. My roots are political. My joints fix are critical. Bernie Sanders. The tree of liberty. The tree of liberty. If you want, if you want to play ball, my presence is critical.

My roots are political, my joints fix. Oh, the national anthem. The Pledge of Allegiance. No, it's not either one of those weird things. Baseball. For every baseball game. Yeah, if you want to play baseball, you need a baseball,

unless it's penguin baseball, of course. That is so funny. If you want to play ball, you have to have a baseball. A team of them. There's a first to the first rules. Can you read it one more time? My roots are political.

My joints fix our threadicles. If you want to play ball, my presence is critical. I keep reading the word our threadicles and I'm like, is that a word? I've never said that word before. That's a word that only exists in a riddle. Yeah, for sure. Um, can you give us a hint?

Oh good, they do have hints. So this all describes the same word but three different contexts. So it's all, it's three different contexts. My roots are political, is one, my joints fix, our threadicles is the other one, and if you want to play ball, my presence is critical. The basket? That is a good guess, and if you want to play ball, my presence is critical. The basket? That is a good guess, but it's not a basket. A field.

So it's something where like, we're like, syllables in the word make something that soothes arthritis. I don't know. I don't think it's exactly that. I'll give you a second. Okay.

My joints are not the same as your joints if you have arthritis. Okay. So that wouldn't just confuse me more. Yeah, that would tell us to be as get rid of the joints of the arthriticals one. Just don't think about that one. Yeah, that clue made me pass out for a minute.

Okay, so you ended up that 40 minutes. Oh yeah, 40 minutes Island. Uh, is it like a material? Is it like leather or wood or something like that? I would call this, I would call this a material, but it's not like leather or wood, it's organic. Water, graph. Isn't that my guess?

Wow, grass roots. Yes. Wow. Aaron good job. I'm scared. Okay. So I'm scared. I didn't mean to get it. You got one. Also, my joints fix our threadicles is referring to how you can smoke weed for arthritis and weed is sometimes called grass. I do want to see a very quick scene. You take a long walk for that with Gotcha. I do wanna see a very quick scene. You take a long walk for that with you. I wanna see a very quick scene. You four are planetears,

JPC, your earth, Chris, your fire, Joe, your water, Aaron, you're a new planetear, your grass, and everyone's just trying to figure out what the fuck is going on. Hey fellas, am I late to the meeting? I have a new ring that does something terrifying. Sorry, you guys are in the middle, so I'm always in all this. I'm sorry, hey, sorry, I know we don't work for the chemical plan or anything.

We're the planet's ears. We're here to clean up. But we're kind of doing a closed circle thing here, so I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry, we just we don't know you yeah It's not the five of us here. I don't know if you're aware the five of us can like make a man Yeah, it's really like a closed five some yeah in a non-sexual context I always feel like we always forget to describe that but it's yeah the five of us make a man non-sexual context. I always feel like we always forget to describe that But it's yeah the five of us make a man non-sexual are you sure his tummy is exposed Yes, so sorry. Yes, but it's non-sexual, but his tummy is exposed

Huh, well, um, I feel like we're all good here. We're all good. I was able to make it past security I'm wanting you guys now. I could be I could be the tummy I'm grass She is wearing a ring. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm late. Did you just say your grass? That's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard heart Sorry, I'm your heart I'm a heart the most good And turn off location sharing. OK? If you're still location sharing with heart,

this keeps happening. Sorry, my monkey cut your scent. Uh, yeah. I feel like, I don't know. I'm one of you. I'm a natural born leader. So if you need someone to sort of be in charge, I feel like I'm your guy.

Well, I feel like you can't really exist without me sort of watering you, right? So like, I don't know, I don't know how like integral you are. Oh, I can exist for that water. And if we have earth and we have water, I feel like the in-between stuff is all covered by that. So I just don't necessarily know that we need to get subs. Wait, I have just a quick idea.

Maybe this is like an audition. Since we're still waiting on air, how about we all five, including grass, put in our rings and see what kind of man we make. Heart. Okay, water. Okay, fire. Or we never do it in this order

Grasping in here grass Okay, it exploded it just goop we're all covered in goop This always happens I think it's hard to fault what come on seen I love I just the phrase the five of us make a man. It's just that, that should be the tagline for Captain. Well, not only do the five of us make a man, but the six of you make a podcast. Is this a transition?

It's gonna work. Yeah, there's something in there, right? The proof I should make amends. So we come to the end of the episode. We want to give you a chance to plug something that you're working on. Chris, do you want to start? Sure. Well, as we've mentioned several times, Joe and I and several other previous guests make the Dungeons & Dragons

comedy podcast, Rude Tales of Magic. We also make a Star Trek version called O'These Those Stars of Space. And outside of that group project, I also write comic books for children. So if you want to buy your kids a graphic novel that is actually funny, please take a look at a book I co-wrote called Investigators Presents Agents of Suit. It is loaded with puns. The investigators are gators that wear vests. They are the investigators.

Vests stands for very exciting spy technology. And we just pump it full of jokes and gags and japes. And there are a lot of fun. And it was recently named, Amazon said it was one of the best kids books of this year. That's amazing. That's awesome. That's a new one for me and accolade.

That's awesome. Sure. Can't wait to read it. One more time with the title of that. Investigators presents agents of suit. I love it. And if anyone's curious, Amazon has been silent on my other projects. Congratulations.

Begging them for a comment. Joe, tell us more about, you know, we talked about so much about root, root tales. Why don't you tell us a little bit about what we like to call these those? These those is a, is a actual play with emphasis on the play podcast set in a Star Trek like universe filled with wild and wacky characters getting into wild and wacky space high jinks. Cool. Oh, yeah. I will say, oh, these those stars of space is probably the most fun podcast title to say out loud. Yes. Thank you. And am I correct in saying that Kasey Tony helped

in some regard to one of the podcasts? Kasey, Kasey has done some sterling editing work on rude tales. And that's the Howard Beans scream. I wish he'd bring that energy to our show. Yeah. Yeah, actually, you could keep a, you ain keep it.

Awesome. Thank you so much. Aaron anything to plug or promote? Nothing to plug for me. I just wanted to ask Christopher. If you had any other graphic novel or comic book recommendations as like a reader, what are you reading right now that you enjoy? What are my currently reading? Let's see here. I'm currently making my way through Uza Maki, which is a Japanese horror comic or a collection of shorts about a village that is plagued by spirals. It's way scarier than it sounds.

Plagged by spirals? Spirals, yes. There's something about this town makes people go mad with spirals. Like they turn into like weird snails slowly Yeah, it's like a jungle. Yeah, it is. That's exactly what you did it. Yeah. I think it's one of the ones I'd like you add all that you have at your house right now. Oh, yeah. Casey Cut that. Casey Cut that. And stick to editing.

Casey, Jesus. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh, yeah. KC cut that. KC cut that. Hey, cut that and stick to editing KC Jesus. Yeah.

Cool. Thank you. I'll add on anything to plug. Yes, a few things. One, please check out my new RPG. It's called tub gin and flag is about a bunch of heroes and wizards who during magical prohibition is what I call it. They bootleg and they try and escape the evil notorious Elliott Nes Faratu.

So check that out. Wow. Wherever you sleep and dream. I also want to plug Casey Tony. I was joking about him not bringing that to our Casey's the absolute fucking best He also speaking of Tetris bought me one year for my birthday VR PlayStation VR Tetris, which was one of the most relaxing fun Wonderful games I've ever played so check that out and he did lend me a lot of Jungie Edo that I have yet to read so

Huge plug for Casey Tony you can find him on Twitter somewhere. You can find him elsewhere at Casey Pony, I believe Casey Pony. X on X X going to give it to you. JPC anything to plug or promote or a review to read. Yeah. If you want to hear how shitty a podcast sounds without Casey Tony, may I recommend Hello from the Magic Tavern, Bill Buds, add all some of your other projects. Aaron, I think Casey does your podcast too though. No. No.

Wow. Anyway, Casey's great. We love Casey. And you know who else loves the show? Someone who loved the five star review. If you want to get a five star review, you should have the show. Just go to iTunes or wherever.

Leave a five star review. I might read yours. Hey, today I read Daylaks. Daylaks says, I used to have a personality. I used to read books and listen to music. I meditated. I had opinions about philosophy. Then I discovered a show in June of 2022. I've already listened to the main feed through twice and today I finished the $5 to you on the Patreon episodes. I fell asleep to the show. It's the first thing I listen to when I wake up. My friends are annoyed and keep trying to do

improv games with them. I stopped reading books. I was on a date this week and I told the guy I needed a moment to put in my headphones and listen to 15 minutes of Heyver and Riddell. I guess I'll have to get the $8 Patreon here because I don't want to do with myself without these three dumb, dumb, yelling in my ears all day. The irony is that I don't like the show and I told my friends recently that I can't recommend it. I feel like he's telling me that he's a pretty typical listener. Heyver and Riddell.

I feel like that's the median listener for sure. Yeah, and I don't know if you want me to give you permission to stop listening, but you don't have my permission. Continue listening, continue paying into that Patreon. You're stuck. Just like us. Well, Jupiter, I got a good one here. Bye forever. Bye.

Yeah, bye. Starting here in China. Bye! I think I'm having a little bit of internet issues. You guys are sounding a little robotic to me. Let me just check my internet speed. Is there a chance that Aaron is better or worse? Don't fuck with me right now. Don't do that. Not so at the time. Now I'm hearing it, that's Australian.

Hey there witches and warlocks. If you like that, you're gonna love this week's Patreon. We bring you the Council of Wizards. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalogue at patreon.com slash hair riddle riddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your 7 day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month. Any get those Ed free episodes.

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