Hey Riddle Riddle - #325: Quick Rebrand

Episode Date: October 9, 2024

Quick! Wake up! We are trying to energize the mainfeed a little bit! Look at us go! If that doesn’t work-Sandy is back and ready with some riddles for us!Starring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifGuest Starring:Sandor WeiszEditing by: Casey ToneyTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!JPC's Guided Meditations Volume 1, available now at our Patreon digital store!Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store! or pins, buttons & printsWant to mail us something? Hey Riddle Riddle 6351 W Montrose Ave #267Chicago, IL, 60634Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531)Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, twenty, Damn, I don't even remember doing that just now. What do you mean? I think I blacked out for that. Did the clap sound good? Sounded good, yeah. I truly looked at time.gov and I was like, okay, let's do the clap. And I'm like, no, wait, we just did that. Uh-oh. Okay. Uh-oh.

So we can't rely on JPC today. I don't know what that could mean, huh? Ooh, maybe I got hit by one of those Edge of Tomorrow aliens. Huh? That'd be pretty cool. That would be pretty cool. It'd be pretty cool to get hit by one of those Edge of Tomorrow aliens, huh?

Actually, this is a good transition into this. Hey, I'm actually gonna call an all-hands staff meeting right now if everyone can sort of file in. Sure, yeah. I was, yeah. I'm okay yeah okay that'll grab your coffee come on in all right my that's mine that's mine okay okay okay okay we go through this every day right out of my head didn't spill your coffee into my coffee and now mine's overflowing great just great I guess he did look Boiler Maker of my coffee into his coffee. I mean, we should add this to the list because the coffee situation here is dire.

I feel like one person gets a coffee every morning and the other two spend the entire morning stealing the coffee away from that person. And that's exhausting. But that's actually not why I called this meeting. It's actually, it's not dire, it's dire. I'm drinking a dire coffee now because I'm trying to watch my sugar intake. What is happening? Okay, okay. This is all actually feeding into my greater point. This is actually all feeding into the grander thing that we need to talk about as a group.

It has come to my attention that a lot of our beloved listeners have stopped listening to the main feed. No! Only listen to our Patreon feed. Oh, okay, that's fine. They have decided that the quality of the main feed is, how do we put this? Not so good compared to the quality of our Clue Crew episodes.

And have they listened to this month's Clue Crew episodes? No, they have not. And I'm sure the tide will change. But I wanted to try to, I don't know, re-energize the main feed, try to capture what we once had in the glory days, sort of figure out why it's not working anymore. A couple things, you've obviously noticed

that I've shown up wearing the sweater today to sort of maybe inspire you guys to, I don't know, make fun of me. Quick check, Edel, did you clock that? I did not clock that. I'm seeing it now and I'm mad I didn't catch it at first. At least I have an excuse. I haven't had my coffee.

Alien got hit by the edge of tomorrow, Alien. Ooh, I'm wearing a crazy sweatshirt. I hope people don't tease me about it. OK, so never mind. I've also just like, I thought thought that maybe we could have like Sandy on this episode, because he used to be around for some of our earlier episodes when people still listen to the main feed.

I think maybe that'll energize the show a little bit. I'm reading from a riddle book. And I thought, I went back and I listened to the first couple of episodes. Do you remember, okay, you guys, please stop fighting over the coffee. I'm serious, I need you guys focused. Nobody's fighting, it's a struggle at this point.

We're just struggling. It's just one long, tense tug of war. You're burning yourselves. Most of the coffee is spilling, please. We don't feel it, we don't feel it. We're biting our bottom lips so hard we don't feel it. The first couple episodes, you might not remember this, but. I might not remember it?

Aaron, I got hit by the Edge of Tomorrow alien earlier today. We don't know that for sure. That's only a hypothesis right now. We haven't proved that that is true yet. Well, we'll know. If I meet Emily Blunt in about 45 minutes, we'll know if I got hit by the Edge of Tomorrow alien. Yeah, that will be the indicator.

Please, please, please, please, please. Wait a minute. What's up with Emily Blunt in Aliens? Every fucking movie she does is Aliens. I can only think of one. Wait a minute. Oh, I thought you were gonna say John Krasinski's an alien because I'm right there with you.

I feel like she's in two movies about aliens. Oh, okay, yeah, you're right, you're right I thought I had something never mind What is it with like schlubby guys from 2000 sitcoms suddenly being like turned into like hot like movie stars Chris Pratt John? Krasinski and In the first couple episodes Old man puzzles, which I don't even know if we called it that at that point, how crazy and kooky is that, used to not know the answer to The Riddles as well.

That's right, yeah, I do remember that. That's insane, that was insane to do. So in an attempt. Wasn't that bad to do? Didn't we decide that was bad to do? Yeah, I think we only did it for like three episodes. Barreling through. In an attempt to repilot the show, sort of bring back our audience.

I thought we would reintroduce ourselves for the first time. Got it. I will be old man puzzles, and I will also not know the answer to these riddles that I'm gonna read today. Hmm, interesting. Does anyone care?

In any part of the pilot, do we say who we are or what the show is? Yes, so. Okay, so that's coming. We're gonna do that right now. We're gonna do that soon, okay. Yeah, we're gonna do that soon. Okay.

Addle did this originally because he's sort of like the heart of the show, he's the show's creator, but Addle, do you want me to do it? Do you want me to do it? Why don't you do it? Great. What?

Hello, and please stop fighting over the coffee. You guys, I'm so serious. We're gonna have to go to the hospital. You're getting burned all over. Don't feel it, don't feel a thing. We don't feel it at all. And I'll just top this off as well. I'm biting my lip more than Bill Clinton during a speech.

Okay, hello. Welcome to Hey Riddle Riddle, a podcast about riddles, puzzles, and lateral thinking problems. We are three comedians originally from Chicago. Is she reading from something? No, I'm reading from my heart. We met doing comedy together in Chicago, but we also all have an enthusiasm for puzzles

and games and escape rooms, so we thought it would be fun to start a podcast where we do those things together. Really trying to capture the energy of how it felt to be in a green room with Chicago comedians. I'm Erin Keefe. I'm one of the hosts. I'm originally from Massachusetts, lived in Chicago for my 20s, and now I live in Los Angeles with my dog Lou. That over there, JPC, put down the coffee. That's JPC. Say hello, JPC. Yes, I got it. Yes, I got it. God damn it. I had to go. Okay, well, as soon as he gets introduced, I'm getting that coffee back. Hi, I'm JPC. I'm from Boston, Massachusetts originally. No.

Actually just outside of Boston from Hingham, Massachusetts This is not true. We just from Indianapolis. I think it's kind of like the rich area of Massachusetts Yes, kind of entitled totally fair. I wouldn't say that. A lot of spoiled people. Sort of the poorest person in Hingham. That's true. It is a very racist place. Can't argue with that. Let's see. I was in Chicago for a little bit. Have a dog named Lou. Nope, has a dog named Spaghetti. Has a, lives in Chicago with his wife and child and dog. Apartment with some of the worst internet

that has ever existed in the history of internet. Great internet and he lives in a house. He has a dog named Spaghetti and a kid named Spaghetti. And I change my hair color every, I wanna say six weeks. Don't really know why. Don't really wanna investigate why I do that too much, but it's important to me.

And it makes me feel something, I don't know what. Adol, why don't you tell the people a little about yourself. My name is Bongo Socrates. I'm a armadillo with a top hat. Huh? We're Farfield. I thought this was a time to, you know, kind of rebrand, have some fun.

Okay, Bongo. Okay, Bongo, we'll play it your way. Tell us about your life, Bongo Socrates. Are you a devil with a top hat? Is that what you said? A devil? A devil? What did you say?

Armadillo, but now I would've been. Jesus Christ, Aaron. Hey, Aaron, can I change it to a devil? Nope. Shit. You're devil Armadillo with a top hat. What else are you talking to me or Aaron? Because you said Aaron, but you looked at me. Yeah, I was looking at you because you grabbed the coffee My name is bongo armadillo. No, my name is bongo Socrates. I'm a devil armadillo with a top hat. I'm from Boston, Massachusetts and I Like to change my hair color. I have a dog named Spaghetti. I have a dog named Mariah and a wife named Spaghetti.

This is kind of fun. Okay, that went way better than I thought it would. Yeah, that's good. That's a clean introduction. That's maybe the cleanest we've ever gotten there. Casey, what's the time? 10 minutes? Okay, great.

So that's it. That over there is Casey. Casey is, how would we describe Casey? Whatever makes sense. Whatever makes sense. Whatever makes sense. And that is the Howard Dane scream. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Interesting. Okay. Interesting. Okay. Kind of embarrassing. Okay. Kind of embarrassing. But you know, performance issues. He's not the same guy he was when we started out the show. I was five years ago and he wasn't there.

So it's like. Six years ago. Yeah, six years ago and he wasn't there. So it's, yeah, it's fine. You know what also I just realized? This is the perfect time for a repilot because we just did months and months of our LA episodes and then into another guest episode. So peep, we have it.

Thank you. That is JD Vance in a donut shop. Casey, move that to where it was supposed to go. No, no, no, no, no. So we haven't updated anybody about what has happened to us since July. Anybody have anything to share before I read these riddles? Since July?

What did I do since July? I spent an evening on a golf course, pretty uneventful. Had to leave in a hurry, kind of left some of my things behind. But yeah, no, I don't, yeah, nothing since the last time we recorded. Wow. I't, yeah, nothing since, since the last time we recorded. Wow. I think, yeah. Wow. Addle?

I guess, I guess my big thing was, I was fighting over coffee. Oh my gosh, you dropped out of the presidential race. I forgot, that was so. Oh my God, yes, yeah. How big of you? Yeah, I guess the big, I guess the big, big big thing the big thing is me fighting over coffee with JBC But the big big thing is I dropped out of the presidential race. Yeah

Unfortunately because Trump kept pronouncing my name wrong You're a real patriot said Adelba How did he say it about a rapper the wickedly talented one and only at the other does he? Okay, that is actual footage, actual audio footage of Trump calling me Adele Dazeem. Erin, I do have something new that I have been kind of dying to talk about. If you really do give a shit, do you give a shit?

I don't. Okay. A man called his wife from the office to say that he would be home at around eight o'clock. Okay, well now I feel bad. JPC, what do you what would you like to talk about? I bought one of these little mosquito bite zappers, like one of these. It's like it's a little circular heat pad thing that you put on a mosquito bite

right after you get it. And then it burns the mosquito bite to cauterize it so that it doesn't itch. But only I think works if you like right after you get the mosquito bite to cauterize it so that it doesn't itch. But it only I think works right after you get the mosquito bite. I actually don't know how good it works, but I've been using it. How do you know you got a bite? Well, there's usually a little bump after you get a bite. But for me, because mosquitoes fucking love my sweet blood, once they bite me, I feel it immediately.

It immediately starts to itch and go crazy. So if I get to it quick enough with that little bug zapper thing, it works really well, yeah. As a friend told me about it, well. Would that be good for you? Ah, I don't know. I mean, I don't think getting a bunch of mosquito bites

is good for you either, but they fucking love me. I don't understand why, but they go fucking nuts for me. Now just to check, is there any chance that at some point if you use that? Mechanism while the mosquito is still on your skin Will you swap bodies with the mosquito? I think if I'd use it while the mosquito is still on my skin It burns the mosquitoes DNA into me. I don't think we swap bodies, but I do think it's power Yeah, okay, maybe do some self-examination JPC because if I'm being honest...

Right here on the podcast? Yes. Okay. Starts to feel around. If I'm being honest, I don't think I would notice for several years if you and a mosquito body swapped. Yeah. That's all I'm saying is I think it would take several years for us to notice and that's

all I'm saying. Okay? Yeah, right right like a mosquito would come on the podcast and start talking about getting attacked by the alien from edge of tomorrow no way no way a mosquito would know that movie reference a man called his wife from the office to say that he would be home around eight o'clock he got in at two minutes past eight his wife was extremely angry at his late arrival why I hope I meet Emily blood mosquito he got home or to work what was the we were thinking about

his wife from the office to say that he would be home at around eight o'clock yeah he got in at two minutes past eight. His wife was extremely angry at his late arrival. Why? It was 8 a.m., not 8 p.m.? Yeah, 12 hours late. 12 hours and two minutes late, I guess. Yeah. He arrived the following morning at eight.

Oh, so he was a full 24? Yes. Was this Jack Bauer? No, he said he would be there at home at 8 p.m. He arrived the following morning at 8 a.m. Oh, at 8 a.m. I would like to see a scene. Okay.

Addle, you and JPC are married. He is coming home 12 hours later than he said he would, and JPC, you're coming up with any excuse of why you're late. Well, well, well. Dinner's cold. Oh. It's borscht. You didn't have to make cold dinner. Is it Tuesday? Oh, I guess it is Tuesday.

It is Tuesday. Cold dinner day. Well, oh god. I was supposed to pick up the cold brew. And I forgot. Well, is it okay if we just eat the dinner without the borscht or the cold brew? You can eat. I already ate. At our designated time. Where were you? at the cold brew? You can eat, I already ate at our designated time. Where were you? I mean, it's, isn't it, oh my God.

Isn't it eight o'clock right now? It's 8 a.m. I've been sitting on the steps with this glass of wine with a furrowed brow waiting for you to come in so you could see how mad I was. Fuck my fanny, of course. Last night was our anniversary. I know! Well, I thought it was our anniversary. I know Well, I thought today was our anniversary

You're gonna you are when you hear mm-hmm my and I won't say excuse. I will say Explanation for why this happened. You're gonna think this is you're gonna be you're gonna be shocked at listening. I'm listening So there's a power outage at work I'm listening. I'm listening. So there's a power outage at work. And it's, I mean, what? It's got to be six o'clock, you know, I'm about to clock out for the evening. Power outage. All the clocks say 12. Blinking red lights. So I start getting hammered drunk.

Because I don't, you know this, I don't deal with stressful situations. You don't deal with stressful this, I don't deal with stressful situations. You don't deal with stressful situations. I don't deal with stressful situations. Airport bars make a killing off you. Exactly, exactly. Anytime there's a canceled flight, missing bag, you went to the airport. Well, because

they have that big board at the airport that has all the times on it. So I thought, what better way to know what time it actually, physically is, than go to the airport? Plus, I'm also, I gotta go to the airport bar because none of the bars around here will serve me. And I can get into the airport bar

because the turnover rate is so high among the staff because it's not a great job. So I'm getting kind of blitz at the airport bar, but then I go to read the time on the big board Guess who's too drunk to read? You me what's this big board that you know that that big board is all the departure and arrival times Exactly. There's more times on that thing than I've ever seen on a clock. I look at a clock I see maybe one time max at a time. This board has, I want to say upwards of 100 times on it.

And it's all accurate, because they'll tell you if it's delayed. They'll say 715, delayed. So I know it's not actually 715. It's going to be later than that, or earlier, I guess. So anyway, I'm looking at the big board of the airport, and I can't read it at all. So I turn to the guy next to me. Who do you who who would you guess is next to me at the airport board? The lead singer of Fuel.

Wrong! Wait Fuel or Tool? Which one did you say? Fuel. It's Fuel. It's the guy from Fuel. Yes! I thought you said Tool. I'm sorry. Yes. No it's the guy from Fuel. So I say, hey, can you help me out? What time is it? I don't think the guy speaks any English. And he may not have been associated with the band Fuel as well. I don't know. Now that you're saying it, I don't know what that guy looks like or what his name is. Yeah, it's the bald guy from, I think, The Voice or American Idol, one of those shows. Is he bald? Yeah, he's bald. This wasn't a gentleman. This gentleman was full hair. Fully haired.

Hairy from toe to tail, honestly. Toe to tail. Tip of nose to point of tail. Was this a monkey? Were you seated next to a monkey? No, they don't have monkeys at airports. You missed your daughter's dance and song recital. Sweetie, why don't you come downstairs

and perform for daddy while he lies to mom. Who? No, Sarah, you remember me, I'm your dad. I don't have a dad. Oh, just because I spent a night with a monkey at an airport because I was too drunk and now you don't have a dad? Yes. Yeah, it was a monkey, you got it. Correct.

See? Yay! It was a drug-sticking monkey at an airport. Picture purchase is the name of this. Oh, okay. I love that. An art expert went to a sale and bought a picture he knew would be worthless. Why?

An art expert? Was it an NFT? Went to a sale and bought a picture he knew would be worthless. Why? Oh, okay. I bought a piece of metal and bought a piece of meat that would be worth us. Why? Oh, okay, here's the thing. This art expert also doubles as an assassin. He knew that this artist that painted this thing was so unknown that they wouldn't be

appreciated while they were still alive. So he bought their work and then later that day... What? Later that day what? Well, he jerked off a little bit but then piano wire, grunt! And he killed the artist increasing the value of set, what's that? With what? He piano, he grunted him with a piano wire, Erin.

I thought you were still talking about jerking off, I'm so sorry. I am grunt. No, if you want it now, this is a PSA for all you out there listening, if you want to extend the pleasure of a masturbation Sessions depriving yourself of play something over this Casey Anything literally way to do that pig orgasms. No, no, not that not that That works, okay. No, don't rap. Yeah, of course I will We're trying to re-pilot. Listen, all you kids out there, if you want to jerk off,

don't use air. Choke yourself with your hand or a belt. That's how the old folks felt when they jerked off in yesteryear. Nowadays, it's all like beer. Casey, cut off the music. Cut off the music. Come on.

No, but you shouldn't do that. That's really dangerous. If you're going to do that, have a friend there with you. You guys. Erin, what? Oh, Erin. What is it? I just sort of came in here trying to repilot

and put on the sweater and tried to do it. And now, GPC's rapping about choking yourself while you jerk off and it feels like it's just business as usual. Yeah, it feels like it didn't even fix anything. And I feel like this is why people don't listen to the main feed anymore. It's just because it's cutting like it's just all about pig orgasms and you know, Aaron. Hey sweetie, would it help if GPC rapped about masturbating without choking himself?

Yeah, that would help. Yeah, okay. I can do that, Aaron. I didn't know if you had to make you feel better. Whoa, slap, slap, slap. Jerk, jerk, jerk. It's time to do the hurt. Grab yourself by your genitalia.

And don't forget to bring some towels, or some socks, or some sheets. Anything except your feet. Don't use a foot to jerk yourself off. You'll get arches, not soft. And fit. You know, it's sad, I know that this is true, and I know we burned this bridge a long time ago,

but none of us can ever run for public office because of the show. Yeah, that's why I dropped out of running for president Yeah, that makes sense. But why would we want to be you know, the president when we already have the fucking best job in the world? mmm-hmm art expert went to a sale mattress ads It bought a picture. He knew would be worthless. Why? Is it not the thing about the guy who got garroted? No. Wow. Okay.

That was my really big idea. And it was smart. Would you like a hint or just the answer? Is it something like he's going to use it to sell, to pass it off as an original because people go to him assuming that it's a guaranteed deal that it's the real McCoy? No, I like the way you're thinking, but no. Erin, I have some art in my house that an artist named Zach Bartz bought at a,

like probably like a garage sale or a, what's it called, secondhand store. And then he painted art on top of it and then it made it art. Is it one of those things? No. Ah, fuck, that was a really good answer, though. Would you like the hints? Please.

He was honest, and there was no crooked motives involved. He did not intend to take any action to make the picture more valuable. He would not have bought the picture if it had been rolled up. That's the most helpful hint. Was he just buying the canvas, and he was going to bleach the canvas and paint something

on top of it? No, but you're you're thinking in the right way. Oh, did you want the frame? He wanted the frame. The picture was worthless, but it was in a fine frame that he intended to re use. That's a fine frame. I do want to see a scene. Oh my gosh.

Okay. Um, Aaron, you are a painter. JPC is your subject, and this is your first session with him at his home. You know, I just want to capture you as you truly are, so whatever you naturally do, wherever you naturally like to be in your home, I think that's where we should set up. Uh, okay, well, I will say, if you want to capture me naturally, this is way cleaner than my house has ever been. I apologize, but I can't have someone come over and I it looks it looks nice I know but it's this is this is cleaner than it usually is. Let's start the scene over. I decided I want to be French Okay, I want to see a scene Erin you're a French artist and JPC is your subject

Thank you so much for having me in your home. Wherever you want to set up, it works for me. I just want you to feel natural and like yourself, so wherever you please. I am so sorry, I did not understand a word you said. Same. You said. Um. See. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Oh brother. I don't know. I like, I like in this new iteration of our podcast that we can at any time call for the restart of a scene. Yes. You know, because this is what I'm saying is we've not given a shit for so many years and I wonder what would happen

if we started to try and to care, right? Yeah. Would the people come back? Taking scenes again. Yeah. You know, maybe we take a scene again, someone gives us a listen again. You know what I'm saying?

Yes. Yeah, okay. We give ourselves a second chance. It inspires the listeners to give us a second chance. No more, you're saying no more first ideas we just we we think about it we take some time and we go with our second idea. KC hit my rap track. Was that your first idea? JPC here I changed my mind it's okay to jerk off with you behind as long as you're behind a friend.

What? Stand with it till the end. Friends can help you jerkin' off. This got worse. And now I know what you're thinkin'. This got worse. Now I know what you're thinkin'. You don't know what I'm thinkin'.

Is it jerkin' off if you use a friend, or is it masturbation in a sexual inn? This is not good. What do you mean? Well I'm Bongo Socrates the armadillo. Interest patient and essentially He's the armadillo my favorite actor is Frank Grillo. Oh what the fuck I Was going I was guest starring Yeah, I really thought that this was gonna go okay. How? Oh. Oh. Alone in a boat. Why? Why are there two little animals alone

in a little boat in the middle of the ocean? This sounds like I'm scolding you two. Is that a real riddle? Why are there two little animals alone in a little boat in the middle of the ocean, boys? Is this the scorpion and the frog? Yeah, are the two animals us and the water around us is the mession and the frog? Yeah. Are the two animals us and the water around us

is the mess that we've made? Again, I don't know the answer to this. Were these the, were this, was this like, Noah's Ark actually brought like three horses and three zebras and this is like a horse and a zebra who are trying their best on a little boat. No, I love that. Like they got kicked off.

This is a Noah's Ark answer. Oh. What two animals would you kick off? Skunk. Yes. The two animals were skunks that had been ejected from Noah's Ark because the stench they were causing.

I would like to see a scene. That sucks, Noah. That sucks, Noah. You shit. Skunks in a little boat who have been ejected from Noah's Ark because you're too stinky. Erin, I'd like to make an adjustment, as per the new rules.

Yeah, of course. JBC and I are the two skunks, and you are Noah, and this is the tough conversation of you telling us to leave. Great. Okay, I'm gonna take this bunk up here. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Ooh, badum-bum, perfect for me.

Hey, guys. Hey, Noah. Hey, Nor-no, Nor-no, Noah. Hey guys. Hey, Noah. Hey, Norno? Noah? Noah. Nimo. Noah. Hey guys. Thanks for the ride, by the way, chief.

Yeah, thank all y'all, lifesaver. That water would have flooded our butt holes. About that, about that. Hey, we're sorry about earlier today. We were just marking our territory you know yeah you served pinto beans for lunch little little tomato juice will get that ride out oh little tomato yeah it's not just to the zebra for me cuz I don't speak zebra so I can't I wouldn't be able to could you apologize, it's sort of about more than that.

He spooked me. Or she. What can you say anymore? It is not. Yeah, this is sort of part of the problem. I'm going to get on your level here when I kneel down. Hey, um. Ah, you scared me, spray.

Oh, god. It's not even. Right in your mouth. Right in your open mouth. I'm so sorry. Right in your open mouth. You're out of here. It's not even right now it's right in your open mouth I'm so sorry right you're out of here it's not even whenever I hear somebody spray I always spray it's like it's about more about

what it's a it's more about that it's it's not just the smell guys you're out of here and it's not just the smell well I also have bad personalities no you are the one and I know it's you two. You're the one setting up all of the poker games at night. And you're taking everyone's money. I don't know how- Bad personalities jerk off motion with actual dick in hand.

Okay, no, I know what you're talking about. That's just jerking off. When you say jerk off motion with actual dick in hand, that is on paper and in practice, just jer jerking off and this is what I mean. All the animals hate you. I know what this is. Is it because we're gay? Is it because you have two male skugs?

No. You want to kick us both off? We have the flamingos on this boat. You think I'm a homophobic Noah? There are flamingos here. As far as I know, we with the only gay couple on this boat Because I guess you said that it was like a repopulation boat or something like that We have all the gay animals here. I love all the gay animals. I

Love okay, not the gay skunks. Not the skunks. I don't I don't dislike you because you're gay I dislike you because you smell like shit and you jerk off and you steal people's money You have a gambling problem. You have a drinking problem. You want us to cut you in huh? No on the gambling profits I want to throw you in the ocean We'll cut you in what hey, we'll cut you in yeah 1% 1% That's great. I would rather cuddle with the porcupines, who are also gay by the way. Yeah, but they're male and female. Sure, there's lots of other individual gays on this boat.

Yeah, but they're gay. It's a beard relationship. This seems like a sweaty fix. Noah, just admit it, you... I'm tossing you in the ocean. Wait, wait, Noah, Noah, Noah, wait, wait. We... okay. No, I'm tossing. No, Noah?

One? We'll compromise, we'll compromise. Two? Me and Mark, me and Mark! We will try to breed with other skunk-like creatures. No. I'm willing to breed with a muskrat. No. I am begging you not to.

And I with a millipede. No, I'm begging you I'm not playing God here I will let a possum watch me do stuff to mark they can't join in who is mark mark this is mark right here I'm mark oh you didn't even learn our name you're offering to let a possum watch you do stuff to Mark? That's your big sell? Why not? I'm tossing you a, no.

Don't be a prude. No. The possum's into it. Eee. Hey Noah, where's your mate, huh? Everyone here's coupled up except for you. Is that what's making you so pissed off? Oh, is it lonely, Noah?

Is it lonely, Noah? You think I'm not sleeping with some of these animals? You're out of your fucking mind. Oh, that's it. We're not putting out. Huh. Oh, okay. We can put out No, I'm saying I let out watch me do whatever I want to mark. Yeah tosses in the ocean tosses See this is the worst episode we've ever done. We're gonna do, I don't know, a couple more riddles and then we're gonna get Sandy in here to fix this. Perfect. Oh, yeah. Well, that's why didn't we just do that at the beginning? That's a way better plan. Oh god, you know

I'm worried about this one given how the content of the episode so far a famous dancer was found strangled The police did not suspect murder. Why? Don't the dancer don't care. I mean no The police did not suspect foul play Okay, yeah What do we know about dance studios lots of glass? Whoa! This one is a crazy answer! Oh, goodness. Is this real? Hold on. Wait, Eric. So you're just reading the answer live.

You're not helping, you're not like trying to solve the riddle. You're just going straight to the answer. Well, I tried to in my head and then I couldn't think of anything. You tried for one second. I tried to in my head and then I couldn't think of anything. You tried for one second? I tried to think in my head. This is the show. This is just the regular show. We're just doing the regular show. Yeah, but you're just doing the regular show. You're talking about jerking off. I have talked about jerking off way more in this episode than I would during the regular

show. This is Patreon level content. This is just a moment that actually fucking happened in history and I did not know about this. This is awful. This is awful. Um, it's a strangulation, Aaron. It's a strangulation. Yeah. Aaron, would it help if the three of us, um, shot a Metallica style documentary where we bring in a therapist and we all kind of work through, work through riddles together? Yeah, that would help. Okay. I can't believe I read this one. See, this is the harm of not work through riddles together? Yeah, that would help. Okay. I can't believe I read this one. See, this is the harm of not reading the riddles before.

Should we ask Becca to do the show again? What are you saying? I would love to have Becca do the show again, by the way. Okay. I have like an unreal amount of therapist, improviser friends at this point. It's like, there's so many of them. We have like five different people we could call to be therapists and do it

Metallica style documentary yes to do a metal document. Okay, so the answer to this is just horrible a horrible historical fact Do we have all the information we need from now? Okay, you just need to know that this happened in history a famous dancer died No, okay. You just need to know that this happened in history a famous dancer died Can you read it again? Is her last name dancer? No a famous dancer was found strangled. The police did not suspect murder There's no way you're gonna be able to guess this because it's just you have to know what this happened Can you give us a year? Can you give us like a time period that we should be looking out for it happened on September 14th, 1927 27 so this is to be your domain. This was, I would have been 14.

I feel like I remember something from a fireside chat. Yeah, 1914. Erin, is this in the US or is this abroad? It happened abroad. It happened in Nice, France. Nice. I'm going to get through this because it's terrible instead of having you guys guess. On September 14th, 1927, dancer Isadore Duncan, who I've heard of, of course.

Duncan Donuts. Yeah, Duncan Donuts. Yes, but also, like, if you ever took ballet as a little kid, you know Isadore Duncan, was strangled in Nice, France when the enormous silk scarf she was wearing got tangled in the rear hubcap of her open car. That's such a big scarf! That's insane. That's too big! Oh no.

Wait, she was driving the car? She's driving a convertible? And it got caught in the rear hubcap? That scarf is so big! Oh my god. How do you get into the car? Shouldn't someone be like, oh, oh, oh, no, no, please, please, don't. This car is too big.

That's horrible. Okay, well, that's a horrible historical fact of the day. Sandy? That's like the guy in Watchmen who died because his cape got stuck in the revolving door and the gangster shot him. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's just like the guy from the movie Watchmen from, well, I was thinking the movie and I think

it's when that Bob Dylan song is playing and they're just kind of going through some of the heroes. But yeah, revolving door, cape stuck, monster shot him. On that horrible note, let's take a little break. One, two, three, four, cape, rick, rick, rick, rick. Go. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. AddleGBC, I bet you can tell I'm in a pretty good mood today. Oh, I can tell people? Thank God, because I've been telling people that you're in an awful

mood every day. So the permission that you've granted me now to tell people that you're in a good mood, this is a game changer for me. Go to my mass text, Erin in good mood. Let's talk about my thing, which is my website I've launched. It's all about cute frogs wearing even cuter hats. You guys, this is the best day of my life. Sorry, Erin. I didn't catch what your website was. I was just updating my website, erinsm mood.com. We have a ton of people that

subscribe to this to like know what your mood is and I as the webmaster. And I tell you that you Squarespace for it though, the all in one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand like Aaron's mood.com Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website engage with your audience and sell anything from products to content to time all one place all on your terms.

Aaron, I'll do something. He's a website about my mood. I know what I'll do. Aaron, I'm going to buy a print off of your frogswithhat.com website. Cute frogs with even cuter hats. Thank you. Squarespace Payments is the easiest way to manage your payments in one place with Squarespace. Onboarding is fast and simple. Get started in just a few clicks and start receiving payments

right away. It's so simple a frog in a hat could do it. Aaron, did you know that on days when your mood is good, our sales go way up on aaronsmood.com? Plus Squarespace has connected social and multimedia accounts. You can connect major social and multimedia accounts to your website in a few clicks as icons, direct links, or embedded feeds. I have all your socials on your errands mood.com Aaron build visitor trust while updating content only where you need it, extending your brand's footprint sellers can also sync their product catalog directly

with Instagram, Facebook, YouTube and Google to reach more customers and reduce the steps for a purchase. And we'll have to talk about that because I need your help kind of setting that part up. GPC honestly, I'm here right now and this is a beautiful and very intuitive website. I cannot complain. Okay, I don't know what the mood is from your voice,

but I don't wanna do another update today. It's really bad when I have to do two updates in a day. Ooh, and Aaron, I love that one frog. I think his name is Alfredo. He's the one with the piano tie. You're selling so much content of him. Squarespace makes it easy to sell access to content on your websites like online courses, blogs, videos,

and laminated photos of Alfredo the Frog. Yes. So head to squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Adel, be honest, whose website do you like better? Just be honest. Um, I think mine.

Wait, Adel's mood is pretty good because he's looking at cutefrogs.com. This feels personal. Sorry. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Oh my gosh, you guys are dressed like a skeleton and a zombie. It really freaked me out. What? Oh my God.

Look at what we're wearing. Oh yeah, I have brains on the outside today. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. And I had chicken wings before this and did an awful job cleaning up. Well, you guys look super scary, but can I tell you what's even scarier? What's that?

I'd love to hear. Some of the stuff that I'm facing in my own life. You're talking about like fears and anxieties and stuff like that, right? Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Big time. And therapy is a great tool for facing your fears and finding ways to overcome them. That's why I use BetterHelp. Oh, now BetterHelp, Erin, that's entirely online, designed to be

convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule, right? It's the one where you just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapist at any time for no additional charge. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. That's BetterHelp. Yeah, sorry, what did you say you had for breakfast? Well, it wasn't really breakfast, it was chicken wings, it was a couple days ago. So you're no longer a vegetarian. Okay, so it was chicken wings, and I'm spelling it K-H-I-C,

it's like a cute, kitschy, there's bones in it though. I use better help, and that kind of therapy works so much better for my brain. Being able to message my counselor anytime when things are actually happening is so helpful better for my brain. Being able to message my counselor anytime when things are actually happening is so helpful for my mental health. Ooh, yeah, and therapy, especially this time of year, can help you learn to accept all parts of you

so you can take off that mask. Not the Halloween mask, but the other mask. Because masks should be for Halloween fun, but not for our emotions. And also therapy isn't just for addressing one specific thing, it's for helping you learn positive coping skills that you can use all across your life. It's about setting boundaries and then deciding where to employ those boundaries.

So overcome your fears with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash Riddle today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Riddle, R-I-D-D-L-E. Erin, what are you going for Halloween? What are you going as? I'm dressed like a witch right now. You guys didn't notice? Oh, okay, let's move on. Hey, guys, you know how an improv like the number one rule, I think for normal improv, not the improv we do, but the normal rule is yes and. No, but what do you mean?

Yeah, no. Well, what I was thinking is I had this dream that maybe instead of the rule being yes and it could be yes sand. What the fuck are you talking about? I'm lost here. What is going on? Yeah, instead of yes and, it's yes sand. Like instead of yes and, it's yes sand box with sandy wise. Whoa, whoa. Hi y'all.

Oh my god, I thought you were dead. We kept you in that box for so long, thank god. Oh, you know, I'm alive. I can subsist onist on I'm just saying for at least three years. So we're Oh, I was too scared to look Yeah, three. Yes. Yeah three years. There is and then after that it's it's also you it's a The all bets are off. So you got to call me up every three years or so. We'll be good JPC will you write that down? We could have had way more time Way over time on this. Sorry, I meant three years in turtle years.

I don't know what that is in human years. Sorry. Oh, that's like 24 hours. 24 hours. It's the worst. Actually, my turtle years calculator is still busted, so I won't be able to help out at this specific instance, but maybe soon it'll be back.

My turtle calculator is in logo. Remember that logo with the turtles? Oh, yes, okay My remember what the fuck he's talking about I thought that would land. Adel you don't know what is logo logo is a programming language I learned in elementary school and there was a the icon was a little title and they call that the turtle i'm not joking Whoa, and then you moved you made little like, um, little shapes with it ran around the screen. Sandy, can I be open? Your audience loves this. Sandy, can I be honest and open and vulnerable with you?

I don't know. The other night I had a dream. The other night I had a dream about the teenage meet Ninja turtles. And in my dream, they were supposed to, because they're all Italian Renaissance artists, they were supposed to love Pisa, the town, the leaning tower. And Sandy, we will get to the reason why we invited you on the show here today, but Adol, what is going on? How did you have a dream about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

What were you doing that put you in that mindset? I don't know because they were like you just dreamed a pun are your dreams all puns Them some of them torture I've had some great puns and dreams. I've woken up I've woken up with a start and been had been like that was fucking brilliant Murdered in my dreams, what the heck Aaron you want to swap you want to swap dreams? Yeah, I just get murdered in my dreams. What the heck? Aaron, you want to swap dreams? Yeah, I'd love to. And I just kill horny teens. Wait. Wait, Aaron, are you a horny teen?

Sometimes. Well, speaking of horny teens, Sandy, what's our game today? Why'd you invite me here? Why'd you wake me up out of this slumber? Puzzles, riddles, lateral thinking problems. Oh gosh, I should have expected it. Well, good news, I wrote some while I was asleep in my dreams, I hope they're okay.

I have not tested them in my waking form. These should all be pun-based if you did them while he was asleep. They're all, well, I wouldn't say they're pun-based, but they're definitely leaning leaning tower of pizza based. Um all right so today we are uh it's a red sauce a red a red base right a leading tower of pizza base that's a red the tomato base uh it's when it's when the pizza delivery guy uh puts the box on a tilt and all of the ingredients slide over to one side that's's why that little table's in there.

Yeah, because for a long time growing up, me and my brothers could never... That's why the table's in there, right. We could never decide on what we wanted pizza-wise, so we'd always do split pizzas. So to know that you open up the box and you get all of your brother's toppings, that would be fucking be awesome. Right. Sorry, man. You're allergic to something on my side, that would be fucking be awesome. Right. Sorry, man.

You're allergic to something on my side, so you got to eat crust. If I say left pizza or left... Left pizza with no beef. Is that right? Left pizza with no beef. Does that ring a bell? Oh, you're talking about the Katy Perry shark, the left pizza. No, I'm not talking about Katy Perry. You would know if I was talking about Katy Perry.

Left, it's none pizza with left beef.. You would know if I was talking about KTV. It's none pizza with left beef. You don't know what I'm talking about? This is the second thing I was talking about. Is this another programming language? I swear to God. I've understood 0.0% of what we're talking about today. This is a 2007 level memes. Okay.

This guy put an order in Domino's. You could specify exactly what you want on both sides. And he just unchecked everything. And I was just going off memory of how this worked, except on the left side, he put beef. And so, so he put the, the box comes and it's just the crust with some beef thrown on one side.

And it's the order is none pizza with left beef. Oh, I haven't thought about this in a long time. It's bringing me lots of joy. There's somebody who learned a programming language in grade school and who loved Nunn Pizza with left beef and they're just going fucking nuts for this episode. Logo and left beef all day baby. If Nunn Pizza with left beef and left shark

could get together, they'd have something. I don't know what it is, but it'd be something. Okay, let's get back to the puzzle. Yeah, please wait Yeah, all right It's off the rails. Yeah, let's go on to the rails. Are we on the rails? Let's go back to the rails the train with the puzzles. It works like this. These are called These are called movie trios and I have made up a description of a theoretical movie with

one word title and you have to give me the name of the movie in one word. Okay? Okay. So these are movies that don't exist. They don't exist. I'm making them up and I'm going to give you like a one line description of them. In addition, I'm going to give you in the description three names associated with the movie like an actor or director. It doesn't matter. You'll hear three names. One of the names,

the initials will be the two letters that start the word. The two letters that start the word will be the initials of the name. One will have a name that rhymes with the movie title, and one will have a name that's thematically related. For for example, if I said Ryan Gosling and Bruce Campbell star in this origin story about a Top Gun character inspired by the works of painter Georgia O'Keeffe, one of those initials, those pairs of initials start the answer word. One of those names rhyme with the answer word

and one of those names is thematically related. So this would be a movie called Goose, because Georgia O'Keeffe, G-O, starts out Goose, Bruce rhymes with Goose, and Gosling is a Goose, and of course, Goose was a character from Top Gun. So you've got four clues in there to get the time. Wow. Whoa, okay.

See, see, I gotta ask, how do you come up with this shit, man? This is fucking blowing my mind. It would take me six days to write one of these. I order, I don't know, I order lots of pizza and see how it comes out. Throw pizza against the wall and see what happens. I spent years in a bunker churning away

at the puzzle mines. Makes sense. Yeah, for anybody who thinks that they can just come out the gate writing puzzles, this is proof positive that you are incorrect. This is a skill developed over decades. Well, and also, I have no idea if this will be any good. This has not been tested. So let's see.

Let's see how it goes. You guys feeling good, you ready? Yeah, we're ready. Yes. Yeah. All right, this film about letting things happen is based on the writings of Pablo Escobar and features Hugh Grant and Kermit the Frog.

So you're looking for one word that rhymes with one of those names, starts with the initials of one of those names, and thematically is related to one of those names. Hugh Grant can't be of one of those names, and thematically is related to one. Hugh Grant can't be the one starting it, because that's HG, nothing starts with HG. Is it permit? Yeah, I was gonna say,

permit is probably the start of it. It is permit. Permit? So work it out. Permit rhymes with permit. Pablo's bars, P-E. Mm-hmm. Oh my God.

And then Hugh Grant, wait, what's permit with Hugh Grant? Grant, permit, permit. Oh with Hugh Grant? Grant, permit. Oh my God, to permit, wow. Oh, okay. Yes, yeah, okay, okay. You on the Sandy train? Yep. Back on the tracks?

I feel like the rhyming one is gonna be the easiest one to get us there and then we're gonna have to work backwards of the rhyme. Yeah. Yeah, I think you're right. Yeah, that's my cheat. Spike Lee directed this movie about the prickly side of flowers starring Tom Hanks and featuring the music of corn.

I wanna say porn, but I know that's not right. And unlike all my other clues, this is a real movie. Oh, okay, wait, can you read it again? I thought that would be funny, the idea that Spike Lee would make a movie with the music of corn. I guess it was too real. Spike Lee joined about the prickly side of flowers

starring Tom Hanks and featuring the music of corn. Thorn. Thorn. Tom Hanks. Thorn. Tom Hanks is thorn. Tom Hanks, corn rhymes with thorn, and then Spike is another name for a thorn.

There you go. Wow this British period piece is based on a story by Stephen King and stars Rita Ora and Brian Doyle Murray, you know that it's Brian Doyle Murray Brother, of course. Yeah, I think Bill's Brian's brother Who's older? Yeah, certainly Brian. Certainly Brian. Certainly Brian.

Can you give the three- Stephen King, Rita Ora, Brian Doyle Murray. I find that when I'm listening to Sandy Reethys, I'm listening for the people's names and then I get all the names, but I forget everything that he said about the people's names. Yeah, so is the names, but I forget everything that he said about the people's names. Yeah.

So is it read or aura is the initials? Mm-hmm. Okay. R-O. Stephen King. It's a British period piece. That's another hand. Row.

Row, row, row your boat. Okay. Brian Doyle Murray. What do you think the synonym is? Stephen King. Brian Doyle Murray. What do you think the synonym is? Stephen King or Brian Doyle Murray? Can you read it one more time? Sorry, it's hard to keep track of all of them at once. This British period piece is based on a story by Stephen

King and stars Rita Ora and Brian Doyle Murray. OK, so rhymes with OK, so it's another word for king. Does it rhyme with king? But it could also rhyme with Stephen, right? It doesn't necessarily have to rhyme with the last name. Or it could rhyme with neither of those and it could be something he wrote. I think I'm also- But it starts with R-O.

Yeah. It starts with R-O and Stephen King royal. Royal. Royal. Is the answer. Royal. Royal Doyle, ugh! Rita Ora, Royal Doyle. Oh, royal dole hard to hand me my brain Here's what you fucked us with Doyle you fucked us with a person you fucked us with a three-day person Gone I don't know what we're gonna say I was gonna say this one really threw me because Brian Doyle Murray

I was like, oh, that's three and I'm like, oh no How do we if it does start the movie is it gonna be all three? But then I was like good nothing's that's three. And I'm like, oh no, how do we, if it does start the movie, is it gonna be all three? But then I was like, nothing's gonna start with BDM, I don't think. Well, something started with BDM, but nothing. I cannot, I couldn't find another rhyme with a royal. So I went with Brian Doyle Murray, beloved comic actor. I didn't think that's what it was.

I'm Murray that everyone knows. Brian Doyle, didn't he have a show that was like him golfing, him and Bill Murray were like golfing? Yeah. No, he was also- He was also a dwarf. No, it was Doyle Goes Fishing. Yep. I need to get one of these for my sanity.

All right. There's plenty more. Brad Pitt and Gary Oldman, starring this family drama by Darren Aronofsky. Honestly, I didn't realize this until just now. I could phrase this as Brad Pitt and Gary Oldman star in this sequel to a Darren Aronofsky film. So Mother is a famous Darren Aronofsky. Black Swan is another one. So mother is a famous one

Is another gear Gary Gary open is G. Oh Brad Pitt is BP. It's not gonna be BP. I'm gonna be BP. It's gonna be dad Dad Darren Irinovsky Darren dad that could be a red dad red dad dad dad It's dad's It's dad. Derezovsky D.A. and then old man is a dad. Dad's an old man. Wow. Wow, fuck me.

This is so hard. This is like, I feel like I'm doing like brain gymnastics right now. Like my brain is stretching in ways that it's like, it can't stretch. Brain-nastics. To be fair, I can see all these words in front of me. So it's a lot easier.

You have to hold a ball in your head. I know I look calm on the outside, but on the inside there's a fire in my brain and everyone is screaming. Write them down. I think it'll be easier if you write them down. You're right. We should say-

Don't tell me what to do, dad, okay? We should say that Aaron took the lotus position while shaking immensely. Did it help? No. Did I try it anyway? Yes. Do you know that name Darren Aronofsky

has Aaron in it twice? Oh my God. Darren Aronofsky. You must love that guy. Yeah, yeah, I love that guy. You love him. Yeah, I love his movies. I love how stressful his movies are.

Give one descriptor about this guy. He dated Jennifer Lawrence and he wears glasses and he directs movies. Wait, Daryl and I actually dated Jennifer Lawrence? Yeah. Yeah. Not only that, he was dating or married to Rachel Weisz? Yes. But she left him for Daniel Craig, I wanna say.

Yes. I have to couch all these because I don't know my gossip too well. All my wives leave me for Daniel Craig. It's so annoying. Sounds like a country song. I'm looking at this motherfucker right now and I would absolutely leave him for Daniel Craig.

I think Weiss and Craig, yeah, they wed. They were wedded. They married. She's the only famous person that spells Weiss the way I yeah, they wed. They were wedded. They married. She's the only famous person, spells Weiss the way I do, that I know of. So when she became famous, I thought, oh, this is gonna be great. Everyone's gonna know how to spell my name now.

I'll just say Weiss, as in Rachel Weiss. It did not work out. Oh man. Kind of like her marriage with Yaron Aronofsky. Kind of like it. That's what I should say. It's Weiss kind of like, you know. Here's another one.

Let's see if you can get this one. Sean Penn plays an author who can only write with one particular implement and Nick Cage plays the voice of the implement. Bon Iver provides the music. Bic. Oh, there you go. Yes, I got one.

I just had time. I had fun imagining a movie where Nick Cage was the voice of a pen. I got one. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Here's another one I enjoyed writing because, well, you'll see. You'll see what happens inside of this fun little puzzle. Milos Forman directs this Bruce Springsteen biopic starring David Cross and Bob Odenkirk. And I'll just tell you, Bruce Springsteen is the topic. He's not one of the names. So it's Milos Forman, David Cross and Bob Odenkirk. This is going to be boss. Boss Rhymes with Cross. I cannot believe Ikirk. This is gonna be Boss. Boss rhymes with

Cross. I cannot believe I can't. How is your brain moving so fast? A Foreman is a Boss, B-O is Baba Odenkirk, and then Cross rhymes with Boss. So, Aaron JBC, we've all gotten one. Yeah. Aaron looks behind her, looks behind her again. No, I didn't. Aaron, don't look behind you. Look to the future. Look in front of you. Sandy's probably got tons more of these. Okay, I didn't. Aaron, don't look behind you. Look to the future. Look in front of you. Sandy's probably got tons more of these. Okay, I'm going to get the next one. Sandy probably has at least one more of these. We're going to let you get one, Aaron. I got tens. I got tens. Let's keep going until, and I'll just write them on the fly if I need

to. Oh, Jesus Christ. Hey, JPC, for this round, how about we don't guess, we'll let Erin guess so she can get one, but you and I try and shout out things that distract her. Adel, I love that idea. And I'm doing a big wink and I'm doing a really big wink at you. Let's not do that though.

Let's just, let's let, let's honestly try and I'm doing a huge wink. A huge wink back. And maybe the best person would win. I'm falling for it. And maybe Erin gets one and it's a huge big wink with my big winking wink. A huge wink back. And maybe the best person wins. I'm falling for it. And maybe Erin gets one and it's a huge big wink with my big winking eye. A huge big wink. Erin, let's all try equally hard wink wink.

Yeah, wink wink and we all try hard. Sandy? I'm falling for it. I heard none of that. Great. A retelling of Days of Wine and Roses. Do you know that movie, Days of Wine and Roses, Erin? I do not. I just saw the play on Broadway. What's it about, Edel?

It's about a married couple with a kid and the dad is an alcoholic and he has a dark era and then gets sober and then relapses and loses everything. Okay. The retelling of that with Paul Mescal, Mescal, Mescal, Paul Mescal, and Penelope Cruz, and produced by Barack Obama.

That's gonna be booze. Wow, way to come through on that promise. What? No, I was yelling out stuff to distract Aaron, because Mescal is booze. Barack Obama is B.O. I was so close. I truly was thinking it and then you said it.

Oh my God, my heart. Aaron's head went, as long as it took Sandy to read that clue, as long as it took Adela to forget what we had just talked about. Wink, wink, wink. No, I got a big wink over here. Just one more, quickly one more. I will get one more.

You just want one more? I got one more. We can do a few more. Okay, great, but at least one more is quickly one more. I will get a good one. You just want one more? I got one more. We can do a few more. Okay, great, but at least one more is what I'm saying. Okay, a documentary all about people who get tattoos of Qui-Gon Jinn. Qui-Gon. You know the Jedi from the.

Yeah. The one who got cut in half, right? Qui-Gon. Yeah, Qui-Gon. This guy never seen the fucking movies, Qui-Gon. Qui-Gon. Well, obviously it doesn't rhyme with Qui-Gon. Okay, it's not Qui-Gon. Qui-Gon. Well, obviously it doesn't rhyme with Qui-Gon. Okay, it's not Qui-Gon.

It's not Si-Gon. A documentary all about the people who get tattoos of Qui-Gon Jinn, narrated by Jordan Peele, and featuring the music of Solange Nowells. Okay. So Qui-Gon J Qui-Gon Jin is considered one of the three celebrities.

Mm-hmm. And is Jin with a G or a J, do you know? You mean he spells his name J-I-N-N in common language. Yeah. Well, he doesn't spell it. It's actually basic, it's not, Jesus Christ, does no one know anything about fucking Star Wars?

I feel like I'm a fucking, I feel like I'm a Jizz Whaler over here. What? Huh? Didn't they change that retroactively? Yeah, but I don't buy that. I'm a purist. It's always been Jizz to me.

Did I, okay, so Qui-gon, Kwa-gon, Kwa-gon. Kwa-gon. Kwa-gon. Miss Qui-gon. Miss Qui-gon. Miss Qui-gon Jinn, narrated by Jordan Peele, featuring the music of Solange Knowles.

Oh, I got it. Erin, I got it. Should I say it or should I not? Don't say it. Say it. No, don't say it, Erin. It's about people who get tattoos. Erin, I'll tell you.

Erin, I'll give you a hint. This is the human body's largest organ. Heart. Maybe, wait, maybe I'm wrong. No, it is. You're right. Skin. You're right. Skin. You're right.

Yeah. How'd you get that? What's the three? Well, Solange Knowles is the, is the, is that what it is? Yes, it's the SK. And then the tattoo is the skin thing, right? And then, what was the skin thing, right?

And then what was the middle clue? Jordan Peele. Jordan Peele. Amelia. If you peel an animal, if you kill a deer and then peel the, you would skin it. Well, you would peel the skin. The best example. Yeah, I mean, apples, of course, oranges,

but to me it's a deal. They have peels. Yeah, to feel it. Yeah, I mean, apples, of course, oranges, but to me, it's a... They have peels. Yeah, to feel that. Yeah, apples. And then, Qui John Gin, Gin rhymes with skin. Got it. He's doing it to make me mad at this point, people. That's not his name.

Oh, when Darth Maul comes to visit you, Sandy, he's gonna have words. I'm gonna tell you about something amazing that I saw, Star Wars related. I don't, obviously it's not a visual medium. It's not gonna be as enjoyable to hear me talk about it as it was for me to see it, but you're just gonna have to find it yourself.

Someone took a picture of a painting someone had done with eight minor Star Wars characters, and then next to them, what they thought that character's penis looked like. And it was phenomenal. And it was correct. $10,000. Yeah, $100,000. I will buy this for $10,000.

Wait, the painting was also a painting of the penis? Every character was next to their penis, was shining next to their penis, yeah. It wasn't like a full, well, it wasn't a full body portrait. It was like the face that you recognize, like Salacious Crumb or like Jabba the Hutt. Can we all agree, Cebola's got a fucking hog.

So also included in this was, what's the guy with the four lightsabers? Not a guy, he's like a cyborg-y thing. What's his name? General Grievous. General Grievous was in there. Which like, what is he? General robot with a head cold, yeah. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Well, he also has a dick. And I know what it looks like. All right, a few more. Yep. You know what somebody thinks it looks like. Let's do one more. One more?

Yeah, one more. All right, all right. This is a good one. Ooh. A retelling of the movie Private Parts, written by Suzanne Collins, directed by Wong Kar-Wai, and starring Dick Van Dyke.

Private Parts. That's the Howard Stern movie. Yeah. Oh, oh. Is it Dong? Dong. It's not Dong because we don't have anyone, we don't have D-O.

Oh yeah, you're right. Schlong? Schlong? It is Schlong. SC? Wow. I set myself up for that one totally unintentionally. Yeah, it is Schlong. Suzanne Collins, SC.

Wong rhymes with Schlong. And Dick Van Dyke, I've heard, is a synonym for Schlang. Have you seen the In the Mood for Love remake with Dick Van Dyke? It is just beautiful, sumptuous. Mm. Uh, Sandy, thank you so much for joining us. Where can people find us?

Did we have fun, or did we not? Do we, are we in pain? I'm in pain, but I also had fun. At a little good time, I had a fine time, and Aaron, well, two out of three ain't bad. We'll get them next time. Yeah, Aaron will get a next time champ. We'll get them next time. Where can people find you, Sandy?

Oh, yeah, you can find me on Instagram at Mystery League and threads on Mystery at Mystery League. Also, I have a newsletter called Signals, which is found at the website signals.fun, S-I-G-N-A-L-S dot fun. Where else can you find me? I wander around Chicago on my bike, spewing puzzles at random passersby. Yeah, I don't know. You're like Billy on the street, but pleasant. I'm like Billy on the street.

Billy on the street went, I think went to college with me. I think we were at Northwestern at the same time. Okay. If I ever see him, if I get a, I'm waiting for to get accosted on the street by him so I can tell him that. And you go up and you say, ma'am, a puzzle for a dollar. And you throw a puzzle in someone's face, correct?

No, but I will do that now, man. All right, Sandy, back in your coffin. All right, we'll see you in three years. Three turtle years. Three turtle years. Three turtle years. Bye. God, I'm gonna miss that guy. But you know what?

I think we'll see him again. Like six, six episodes-ish. Oh, nice. Four, five, six episodes. Yeah, so it'll be fun. Addle, anything to plug? Aaron, I'm so glad you asked. I wanna plug a little thing called Joe Co Cruz.

Woo-hoo! Next year, 2025, from March 2nd to March 9th, the three of us will be on the Joe Co Cruz, a Jonathan Colton cruise ship that sets sail along the Caribbean, I believe. Janet Vardy will be there, our fourth host, all kinds of amazing, uh, other folks. I know I I'm pretty sure Amy man will be there, which I'm freaking out about. Um, comes, come see us on the boat. Come take a cruise, buy your tickets, get a cabin. Uh, we want to play games.

We want to sing shanty songs that Aaron talked about. We want to, um, what else happens on the cruise ship? It's the best time ever. It was the best piece of my life. I've never been more excited to do anything as I am to go back on this cruise. So come on, Joko, and make this week the best week of Erin's life.

Whatever happens on the cruise stays on the cruise. Oh, and if you are interested in cheating, that's also, Erin, you said that there was lots of cheating going on on the cruise? What? Because there's no rules, right? Because you said international waters. I did not.

The only reason I'm going on this thing is because of international waters. I would like to plug. Oh, real quick, sorry. Go to joecocruise.com. That's J-O-C-O, cruise.com. Also, I'm bringing my wife and she is really looking forward to cheating

So that better not have been wrong. I Sold her on the cheating with a skunk, right? Yeah Sorry, Aaron do you have anything to plug or promote? Um, I is this true JPC in the Bio of our episode sure you can submit to where you would like us to do live shows. Yeah, HeyRid of Riddle.com slash live something. It's in the link. Live requester, yeah. And if you want us to come to your city, go and fill out that form.

We would love to set it up and maybe come see you next year. So go check that out. It's HeyRid of Riddle.com slash request. That's the link. Oh, nice. That's the link. What do I have to plug? Oh, yeah. I mentioned it last week as well,

but I am taking over as the producer for the show World News in Chicago. That's W-H-I-R-L-E-D, news. In Chicago, we're every Saturday night at the I.O. Theater and come and see a show. It's a lot of fun. And a lot of hate revertal people show up to the show. And if you are a hate revertal person that shows up

to the show, it's OK to say hello afterwards. You don't have to not say hello. You can say hello. It's fine. And the Aaron guarantees any time I'm back in Chicago, on a Saturday I will drop in and I will insist to be a part of the show. We have some casting decisions to make.

So we'll let everyone know. What the hell are you talking about so we'll let everyone know. Are you phasing me out? It's not really a phase out, you don't live in the city anymore, it's like a gentle goodbye. Arma dello devil, fix this! Aaron, I'm starting a new show, it's called World News Tomorrow, and it's sort of like precox, we're trying to figure out like, trying to take a guess. Precox can still get you pregnant, Jupiter.

Thank you, that's what I was going for. Precox, Tom Cruise up, I got hit by the fucking Edge of Tomorrow alien again. Here we go! You guys start the episode over. Aaron, whatever you're ready. Start the episode again! Aargh! Casey Toney to the editing!

Now our grandparents in the music. Boko created by Emily Cardemus and Emily Nemours. One, two, three, four, hey, Riddle, Riddle. Hey there, manatees and milks. If you liked that, you are going to love this week's Patreon. The crew goes to a haunted house, but really this time. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com slash heyriddle riddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your 7 day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month. Plus you get those ad-free episodes.

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