Hey Riddle Riddle - #388: Best of 2025 Part 1

Episode Date: December 24, 2025

It's the Holidays and we are celebrating our favorite holiday: ClipShowsmas.Also, we have released audio of all of our 14 2025 liveshows for purchase on our PatreonStarring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifEditing by: Casey ToneyTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!JPC's Guided Meditations Volume 1, available now at our Patreon digital store!Want merch? Visit our Dashery Store!Want to mail us something? Hey Riddle Riddle 6351 W Montrose Ave #267Chicago, IL, 60634Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531)Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. The doctor was the mother. He stood on a block of ice. Both of the network of fish. It was the cabin of an airplane. He stabbed him with an ice cream. And the horse of things Friday. It's beginning to look a lot like best of...

Best of. All the clips from this year. Dooboo do, do. A little bit GPC. A little bit air and C. And Adel's there and Casey as well. And Aaron, thank you so much for taking my last. of course that's what good husbands do wait what happened this year you're erin pc now yeah

you're erin pc isn't that called you erin c erin plain comedy i love it i love it you guys well we done did it again we did a whole year of riddles puzzles lateral thinking problems plus all the patreon episodes and we all lived just to tell the tale how does everyone feel you know what i think this year was the best year yet and next one will be even better oh it's easy to know if i'm lying by listening to all the best ofs you know kind of like back to back because they're out there now and being like well this one obviously this year is kind of you could do your own ordering but to me this year was the best year yet

and you might think it was a b minus year comparatively to our other years and we'll we'll say we'll do better next year yeah we'll get them next year tiger we'll get them next year Should we do a best of the best of? I actually would love to do that. I want to put together an episode of all the times we've laughed the hardest, which I know is self-indulgent, but I want it just for myself. When I'm 90, I can listen back to all the times we've laughed the hardest. Oh, I think, so for what Adel was saying,

if we have maybe five minutes of us doing like a bumper for the best of every year, and then if we do what 10 years that's 50 minutes so we have to do about 10 years of this and then we can do a best of the best of bumpers compilation and by compilation I mean we use the whole five minutes so it's not really so I guess we have to do 20 years if we do about 20 years

no there's two best ups so it's like five each yeah okay 10 years so meet back here 10 years And you can listen. And if we're all not married. This didn't make it. This didn't make the best of. Well, guys, thank you so much for sticking by me. And we went on tour this year.

Sticking by me? Sticking by you? Yeah. You guys are sort of dying on the air and help. Yeah. Okay. Wait, did you guys do something worse than what I did? I don't know.

All right. Well, wait, what did you do? What did you do? Oh, that's great. That's a fun thing. On the count of three, let's also the worst thing. We did this year. One, two, three.

Backed over a bald eagle. Oh, hold on. What did you say? I said backed over a bald eagle. I didn't say anything. Well, everybody, Merry Christmas Eve. I think that's when this is coming out. Or you're in that weird interim between Christmas and New Year's, in which case,

mu, one, one, ma, kiss, kiss, love, love. Go eat cookies for breakfast and play video games for 18 hours. We love you. And we hope that you enjoy some of the best clips of Hey Riddle Riddle all year. Bon Appletit. Addle, can you say Bon Appetete? Bone Appetite. There you go.

I've got that bone appetite. Too big with you. I watched Star Wars episode one recently, and after the credits hit, there's like a big like you know explainer text that comes up it's the star wars crawl but it just is like jake lloyd's parents were actually a lot and it's not really his fault because most of what you see on screen is like projections from his parents were kind of making him there's a reason but colloquine doesn't act much more yeah i'm sitting there watching i go yeah i like this movie a little better yeah and then at the end it goes jurg jr binks huh well that one

got away from us if someone's bored at work right now and you know how to make that star war scroll can you Please put what J.B. There's got to be some easy way to make. I love in the credits, it's like... I would fucking die. The movie's not even released yet, and they say, Judge Arbanks, who, that one got away from us. And it's like, there's still time.

If you could put this crawler... A galaxy at war. The Imperial Trade Federation is blockading the pletting of Nabu. Also on Nabu, Judge Arbanks. Now, hold on. Because, now, the actor who plays him is black. Nothing matters.

You're sitting there It's 1999 You're watching the scroll And you're like Oh, this is going to be the worst movie I've ever seen This is going on way too long Some of these aliens look like a certain race But we didn't mean for that

So anyways Enjoy the film So anyway, enjoy the film Oh and this is Hey Rona Rural Aaron Aaron please Google Do Sharks Fart Aaron go ahead and Google

Do Sharks Fart Most sharks do not fart. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. But Sandtiger sharks. One shark is throwing off all the data. Hold on, hold on, hold on. This is the funniest thing I've ever heard.

They are calling out. What shark. That's, Casey loves it too. That's so embarrassing. I would be so embarrassed about it. It feels like the answer is also written by. Sharks? Like, do sharks fart?

Most sharks don't. And then whoever, whatever sharks said that, turn their head to look at like Kyle, to look at like one shark specifically. Famously can't turn their head, turn their whole body. It's not subtle at all. They turn their whole ass body to look at one shark.

One star reviews do truly tell you the most information, but never about the thing that they're reviewing. They just tell you about. like, because you have to be pretty mad to write a one star review, right? No one just is like, offhandedly, yeah, they think about it like a week later and you're like, you know what, that was a one star experience. And reading like one star reviews of gas stations is so fun because it's like, you are so bothered because everyone has to use a gas station.

And you really don't like, the only thing that people do is like, hey, I'm out of gas I have to go or like, hey, what's the best price? But never will people read a review of a gas station be like, yeah, it sounds like this guy I had a really bad experience with a candy bar here. Maybe we don't feel clear of the shell. Are there any five-star reviews of gas stations? I'm sure there's one. Yeah, I mean, because civilization is done.

This is the, we have reached Foukayava as the end of history. There's nothing left to do. There's nothing left to do, but like, enjoy your miserable existence and write five-star reviews of gas stations. It's funny to me of like, whenever people write reviews and complain about the bathroom of gas stations, where it's like, the only thing that's happening in those bathrooms is emergency. shit. What do you, what do you, and everyone's partook in that. Everyone, no one is innocent in this regard. I wouldn't know what you're talking about.

If you had a job, let's say a thought experiment, you have a job and you're, the job is to clean up bathrooms after people take emergency shits. What do you think that job deserves to be paid? Because for me, it's like six figures minimum. Yeah. So if you're complaining that a bathroom and a gas station is disgusting, it's because that job that no one would do isn't being done because they're not paying someone to do it. Agreed. You guys, I'm reading some five-star reviews of gas stations and they're actually that kind of warming my heart. Oh. These are lovely. Great gas pumped well or like what? How do you compliment a gas station? Yeah. Are you in L.A. though? Are you searching for gas stations in L.A.? Yeah. Because this is just a town of aspiring writers.

These are just people, these are just the most insane deranged people in the planet trying to get their scream play out there. It's like, exterior gas station, night. Yeah, I was just about to say that. I'm just about to say that. Oh, my God. Exterior gas station night. I walk in again again. We open on a 22-year-old perky tits. Can I tell you something at all about that dream? Yeah. So normally, if a friend told me they had a premonition dream about me being pregnant, I'd be like, oh, fuck, am I pregnant? But guess what? And this is a little bit of an overshare, but maybe it's relatable. But literally. 10 minutes ago, I felt myself get my period. So actually, we are in the clear. If everybody wants to go back to exactly 10 minutes ago, and I guess I'm at the year where I'm telling people when I'm getting my period.

But if we want to go exactly, I think it like, yeah, about 10, 11 minutes ago, I went, oh, and you know that feeling if you're a person who gets their period. You go, oh, oh. Casey, can you pinpoint that moment and put like a bell chime, like a ding? Yeah, put a bell chime. Put a bell chime.

And so, guys, that's what the bell time was. Holy shit. I'm actually glad that this is happening. Aaron, you are a mermaid. I love it. JPC is like on the shore of the ocean kind of like just walking along. And you are in the ocean trying to flirt with him as he's walking along as a mermaid. But the ocean is just absolutely pounding your ass.

Uh, you-hoo. Hello? Is there someone there? I was having a tranquil morning walk. Someone here? Wow! Wow! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Stay in the... I'll help! I'm not a strong swimmer, but I'll help! No! No! Please! I live in the water if you can... Oh my goodness! Help me! I'll be! Oh my! Oh my! It's... A woman with the lower half of a, of a fishro-see creature of some sort.

She's both graceful and incredibly not. Hello, if you come in here for a tranquil swim, I could perhaps give you a kid? There's a... Oh, look out for that buoy. Ow! Oh, it knocks the wind out of me. There's a wind advisory today. It's very, it's very rough water.

Oh, I have... There's a bay. There's a bay like a little ways down if you could, if you could make it to the bay that's, it's calmer in there. Yeah, I don't look as majestic in the bay. I'm sorry, but you don't look, you don't look at, just go under the waves. Hold on, hold on, shark, shark, shark. Oh, no, please no, not now.

I just swallowed so much speedily. Ow! Ow! Ow! He's got a little sash on it. Does he work for you? It looks like he's trying to help. I know he's trying to help and it's not working. Scene.

Well, I have a new favorite scene of all time. I scared my dog. I hope it's worth it. It should be. It will be. And it shall be. Adel, you're a guy named Pete and you're lending JPC money for the last time. This is his last straw.

All right. Here you go. This is $8,000 cash, and I want you to know. Yep. I expect it paid in full in 30 days. Yes. And this is the last time. And please just whatever you do, don't tell my sister because I thank you for letting me, you know, meet you at your job.

But this is the last time. I just don't. I don't need it to hear from her. Well, she's in the kitchen, of course. Yeah. You're my brother-in-law. I do anything for you, but this ends now. So I guess I'd do anything for you up until just now,

and now there's a limit. Is it 30 calendar days to pay you back? She's coming, she's coming, she's coming. Hey, Carol. Hey, she's. No, I won't suck your dick. Whoa, what's happening? Carol, your husband just gave me $8,000 to suck his dick.

Oh, my God, did you? No, sweetie. What do you? Strike three. Shit, I've done this two times before. I did this two times before. Three. Strike.

Three. Sweetie, come on, give me Strike three. No, ball three, ball three, ball three. No, no. Full count, make it a full count, about four. Absolutely disgusting. Kick him out.

Kick him out. Strike three. The first two times he said it was an accident. This time, it was clearly on purpose. No, your brother, he's borrowing money. I would never borrow money. Then give the $8,000 back. I earned this.

You sucked his dick? I already did a little bit. Oh, my God. But you both are just as bad as each other. Why are you mad at me? You sucked his dick for $8,000, my husband, my own brother. That's my job. I know, I know.

My job is to do that. Here's the crazy thing. I don't even know if $8,000 is a deal or not. I don't know the going rate. Yeah, right. You don't know the dealing rate, Mr. Strike 3. You don't know the going rate. You know what?

I'll, here's what I'll do. I'll take half. That's fair. I'll take the other half. And I'll take the other half. That's fair. Pete. Get out of here, Pete. Why don't you go and think about this?

Straight three, Pete. Go to the other room and think about this. Fine. Okay, how many more times do you think we could do this? Three? It's seen. Florida's invasive herpes monkeys can now be found from Jacksonville to Tampa. Old.

On. Hold on. Silver Spring State Park has been home to a large troop of invasive STD-carrying monkeys for almost a century. But now sightings are becoming more frequent in Florida cities hundreds of miles from the park. According to a new report from First Coast News, the population of Rhesus Macawks. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. I think we just need to let this wash over us at all. I think we deserve this kind of joy, and I think instead of fighting it, let's just give it.

That sounds like It sounds like the comeback of like a seven-year-old of like Yeah Yeah Like do you want some Reese's and the kids like Reese's like like like And then a whole life table is like Yeah

Like you got chocolate in my penis butter Yeah Rees is spacoggs You know what I'm saying Has expanded considerably over the years And the monkeys are now being spotted In northern cities like St. John, St. Augustine Palatka

Wellaka and Elkden And as far south as Apatka and Tampa. Not Pacca. Not Tampa. The monkeys were originally, this is awesome, part of a failed tourist attraction. How many failed tourist attractions do we have in Florida? I mean, it's like a state full of failed tourist attractions. That's the lifeblood of the state.

I think Florida is a failed. No, yours. It was called Colonel Tui's Jungle Cruise in the 1930s. And a survey performed in 2018 found that, Silver Springs Troop now consists of roughly 300 monkeys, and 25% of that population carries herpes. Can someone check Colonel Toey for STDs? Oh, me? Oh, interesting.

Yeah, Colonel Toey probably wasn't the name of a monkey. It was probably the man who ran the cruise. Yeah, and can we check his? Can we check his hard drives? Yeah. I'd like to see a scene. Aaron, you are a Reese's macaque monkey, and you found out you have an SDD and you're calling your past partners.

Don't pick up, don't pick up, don't pick up, don't pick up, don't pick up, don't pick up. Colonel Tui. Seen. I was like to see another seed. Okay, sure. JPC, you are one of these STD monkeys and you're at a bar in Tampa. And Adel, you actually know about his reputation when he's like trying to pick you up. And you're kind of putting him in his place.

Can I get a banana martini, please? Thank you. Let me get that. Huh? Jake, let me get that. Okay. Yeah, beautiful lady like you shouldn't be paying for her own banana martini. Let me, please put on my tab, Jake.

Jake, I'll be, yeah, dude, you got to pay and money this time. Oh, yeah, yeah, no. Yeah, put on my tab. Yeah, I'm good for it. I'm good for it. I'm good for a lot of things, pretty lady. Oh, Jake, as in greasy Jake? Are you greasy Jake?

So I wasn't saying my own name I was talking to Jake the bartender What are people calling me? Nothing, nothing doesn't matter It doesn't matter What's my name? Oh my God I knew it, I knew it, I knew it

Take a shower Take one shower You don't think I've tried I don't think so No I don't think you've tried Greasy Jake Are you telling me you are a daily shower I'll be in the back

If anyone needs anything There's no shower back there, so there's really... My name's Saltines. What's your name? Salteens, it's a pleasure to meet you. My name is Mr. Banana Pop. Oh, no. Oh, so you've heard of me.

Oh, no, I have to, I have to go. I need to go. Greasy Jake just left. We have this whole bottle ourselves. I can kind of reach my prehensile tail over the bar and grab whatever bottle you like. Bottle smashes on the ground. Okay, so I can only lift like half a pound.

And these bottles are heavy. These are handles. You said your name was Saltine. Yeah, forget I said that. Have a good night. Well, I'm about to have a good night if maybe I could talk to you for a little while. Do these names sound familiar? Sarah.

Lil Lisa. Oh, fuck. Melinda, bonkers. These are all of my friends who have slept with you. Unbeknownst, they didn't know that everyone else. They didn't know how much you were getting around. Okay? Well, getting aroused more like it.

Look, I, Mr. Banana Pop is a lover, not a fighter, okay? They never, they all had a pretty good time, you know, if you ask them. Now, did they like the fact that they all slept with me? Maybe not. But individually, during the act, they were all having a lot of fun. I think throws the martini in your face. Nope. Let me ask you questions.

He caught that in one. I've had a lot of drinks thrown to my face I've got a lot of practice. Oh, no, don't be for saltines. Salteen, have you ever had every grain of salt licked off your cracker

if you know what I'm saying? They don't know. We got to them in bed the next morning. Oh, my God. I hate myself. I guess I probably should have said at the bar, but I have an STD.

You piece of shit. Oh, let me finish. No, drink in your face. Gulp, a saltine tasting deficiency, because I got to get a little more saltine. No, but I do have a monkey disease. Yeah, see. All right, everybody, gather around, gather around. Good stuff out there, I would say, in the first act.

What's that? Should we be in lotus? Yeah, and Brian, go ahead and just let us know what you think lotus position is. They put my head by my feet? No. Incorrect. No, Brian. That's more of like a yoga position.

Hey, guys. Yeah, what if we all just spoke to joint and got Rupier floats? That sounds pretty good after... Kelly, I love that. We might be doing that after the game. But for now, even though we're still down six points, let's try to, like, just do our best to play Ultimate Frisbee.

Oh, we're in the middle of a game. Yeah, yeah. So a real quick reminder of how old. Ultimate Frisbee works, you're allowed to move when you don't have the Frisbee. You only have to be standing still when you have the Frisbee. Wow. Well, the path to Enlightenment is moving with or without the Frisbee. Brian, I don't know what that means.

I got to admit. It can't have anything to do with Ultimate Frisbee, right? I got to admit when she said, smoke weed, get a root beer float. I already started smoking. Yeah, no, yeah. I can see that. So basically what we're doing right now, and I love it, because we're all. standing at the goal line.

Right. Smoking weed. Yep. And drinking root beer. Yep. And reading Howard Zinn. Yeah. I have seen, Brian, I have seen you.

That's a big book, too. People's history of the United States, that's a pretty big book. For a game of Ultimate Frisbee. Pretty big history. Coleman, can you remind us of the stakes of this? It's just us playing another dorm, right? Yeah. We're playing East Hall.

Yeah, we're just playing East Hall. Well, here's the thing. I guess there are no stakes. that's good because we're vegans well we're all having root beer floats so I don't know how vegan we are huh what do you mean

that's ice cream is dairy and that what huh I actually I knew about this earlier and I didn't want to introduce a whole thing that was going to make us not focus on the fact that we're not playing

ultimate frisbee and it's fine that no one wants to play Ultimate Frisbee but this is like a volunteer thing so if you don't want to play the game, like, you don't have to be here. No, I like, I like Frisbee. I like Frisbee. We should play. We should get a group together, and we should play. Oh, that would be amazing.

That's truly what this is. Yeah, we could get a group together, and maybe it's like all of us in West Hall, and then we could, like, we play East Hall. Like, East Hall and North Hall and South Hall. And then there's like a tournament every year, and whoever wins the tournament, gets a trophy. We should put something like that together. You should put something like that together. Yeah.

I'm going to run over and pitch the idea to the East Hall, guys. You guys, hang out. Hang out real quick. I'm just going to run over and pitch the idea to the East Hall, guys. Hey, guys, we're going to forfeit again. Good news, because we are high over here. But we did have an idea. What if we?

Now, I'm all good on ideas. Yeah, we get a bunch of people together. Nah, I'm all get, see. Same, say it. Well, the scene that I want to see is now. changed. I want to see JPC as someone on a tour at Graceland who just wants to see the bathroom.

Can we go back to the bathroom? I actually don't want to see a scene. Oh, wait. No, Adel, I want to do that scene. You just set up. You're both on the tour. Ready? Here we go. Elvis obviously didn't get to spend too much of his life here because he was always on the road traveling and then obviously he's really associated with. Sorry? Can we go upstairs? Sorry. If we have to use the bathroom on the tour, can we go

upstairs? If someone has to go to the bathroom really, really bad upstairs, can we go upstairs? We have our bathrooms right by the entrance. They're full. That's not the one he died on, though, right? No, also... I don't care about that.

I just have to use the bathroom and those are full. Inside the house, actually, none of these rooms are usable. There is no running water here because this is more of a museum. This is for display only. You actually can't even get into the bathroom. I'll scoop everything out like I normally do, but I just want to go use it.

No, sorry. You can't use any of the facilities inside the touch. You can't even sit on one of the chairs, let alone the toilet. Hey, Steve, hey, Steve. Yeah. I'll do the thing. Okay, do it. Excuse me one second. I have to go behind this door.

Sir, you can't, sir. Excuse me, oh, screw, hey, lady. It's me. I'm back. My friend. Sir. Sir. Sir.

He can't say what. Hey, your, comes as what. He can't do the voice if he's wearing clothes. It's kind of like a, it's an image thing. It's kind of like Dumbo's feather. What? It's kind of like Dumbo's feather. Also, so I, you're sneaking like a cartoon character.

Herked her up the stairs, other guy. Me? Yes. Don't perceive me. No. You think that this is my first rodeo? You think this is my first rodeo? You think that there's not freaks like you coming in here every day trying to use that toilet?

We'll have three security guards. I'm sure there's not freaks that work as a team. Har ya! Ow! Man! Hey, it's hot. Hey, Steve, sorry. Aaron, are you happy we saw this, see?

Yes. The two of you are snakes, and you are in the studio about to lay down your first album. I'm getting a lot of feedback at the mic. That might be a mic issue. Are you sure it's us? It's a mic issue. Yeah, it is you okay. And we are, and recording.

Where are you? Dean. She was responsible for the deaths of many people, yet she was never charged. How come? Does charged mean charged with a crime, or is it like a battery? Okay. Yes. And this is almost like, I've, this is such a dumb riddle.

This is like when people call their boat like, oh, she's a butte. So this is a manmade thing. An inanimate object? Yes. Okay. And think historical, think historically responsible for a lot of deaths. Can you read it again? It's just the fucking Titanic.

Panic again? No. She was responsible for the deaths of many people yet she was never charged. So this is something where you, when you see it, you're like, yeah, of course it's responsible for death. Like no fucking duh. Not like when you see a rat and you're like, oh, what a weird little creature. She was a guillotine.

Erin, she was Madame guillotine, the deadly invention of Joseph guillotine that was used in France to execute people. This riddle is so dumb. We gendered a guillotine in December. decided it's a woman? Absolutely not. I guess they called it Madame guillotine? Oh, interesting. Was the guy single? This is my wife, Madame guillotine.

I hope that that's the cruel nickname my exes have given me. Madam guillotine. Madam guillotine. Aaron, you are going to be, I want to see a scene. Aaron, you're going to be playing a woman. Again? All right, yeah. Let's make. mix it up. Okay, Eric, you're going to be playing a kaiju. Hey, uh, Ringo, do you

have a minute? Oh, yeah, I was just stared at my drumsticks, trying to see if I could get some inspiration. Yeah, I, um... What about, like, dum-a-dum-bum, bum, bum-oh. Hey, okay, don't come to me. I should have written it down. Uh, Ringo, I... How would you write down a drum sound?

What would that even look like? I feel like that famously people can write down A drum part Yeah Ringo Wait, there's like sheet music for drums Yeah, there is Oh boy

I'm gonna just go up a chair I'm next to you Hey So I would consider our That's a chair Oh God Oh I thought that was a drum Ringo honey

I've been playing it like a higher hat Look at me Look at me Hey you're here Here we go yay Look at me Yes Yes.

How long have you been here? What's that? Several minutes. I consider our love story sort of like a sweeping, beautiful love story. We're really in love, you'd agree, yeah? I'd agree, yes. I'd say we're in love.

I noticed your new album came out. In the song... The Beatles. Yeah, the Beatles, buddy. Yeah, you're a beetle, buddy. I'm one of the members. Yeah, you're the fourth one, bud. Yeah, it's really cool, huh?

They said it's not about who's one, two, three, or four. You're four. You're for sure four. They just said it's all four of us Yeah, yeah, but you're four And that's okay Where am I on the position On the album cover Where we're all walking across the road

And I don't know for sure But spiritually, you're always four, okay? We took a bunch of pictures With me in the lead I noticed They said Ringo Go to the front for this photo The songs you seem to

Pitch Are sort of Pitch I have to write that down That could be good for some of my songs It's like Octopus's Garden. That's one of mine! Yeah, yeah.

That's not about love, though. You just seem to not, you don't really like write anything political. Your stuff is sort of like trippy, drug-fueled nonsense. Even the stuff you say they get turned into songs. Like, it's been a hard day or like, I think you said it's been a hard day's night. Hard day's night. That one has drums in it. I got to play on that one.

I think a lot of them do, buddy. Most of them do. No, yeah, a lot. Hold on somewhere. He says he doesn't need me. Yeah. He writes a lot of the songs. Same.

Well, here's what's not funny is that we simply must do riddles. I'm ready. I love doing riddles. It's like one of my favorite jobs. A man appears in hundreds of family photos. He's not closely related to anyone else in the photo. I know this. Almost all the families don't even know his name.

Clippy. Nevertheless, they still keep the photos in frames and scrapbooks. He is not hidden in any way. And it is, in fact, the central element of these photos. Just hear those slave bells jingling rings. Ting tingling Toaddle this man is the slender man He's in all your photos

Uh huh Me and the slender man Armour armoureddish shoulder He went to summer camp with the slender man Yeah his name's Greg Solid dude Back then he was just Svelt man right She gets a bad rap

Because he told three kids to go kill somebody With hammers or whatever But He's a solid dude Yeah He never killed nobody with hammers He was at your wedding. He was at my wedding.

Santa Claus. Aaron, you're correct. It's Santa Claus, specifically a Mall Santa. Just because we say nobody knows his name. I'd like to see a scene. Addle, you are a Mall Santa. And JPC is a kid that has been here at least four or five times this season, and you think enough is enough.

Ho! Ho! Come on up. Not on my lap, but not on my lap, but. We have a little side chair. Do you remember me? I remember all boys and girls. Okay.

What did I ask for last time? Oh, you, what do you think you asked for last time? Probably a Chi-I. Joe? I know what I asked for last time. And I know the closet where my parents keep the presents and it's not there. Okay. Was it a... So I've been body shaming my dad all day to get him to come back to the mall to buy a new suit.

He pans over to the dad and the dad's looking at his reflection and sort of pulling at his clothes because they all of a sudden feel like they fit wrong. Because he didn't want to bring me back here to do Santa again, but now I am back here. Oh, you're an intense little boy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I am. Okay. You're the same guy, right? Santa's always Santa. Smell like Paul Malls and old whiskey. Paul Malls? You think I smoke Paul balls? I don't know what you're doing.

Your dude's pulling in $3.50 a day for Mall Santing, and you think I smoke Paul Moles? $350 a day? Oh, yeah. Okay, well, then you should... And the tail? The moms? Do you know how many single moms?

Hey, man. Want to come sit on Santa's lap? It pans to a mom, and she's adjusting her clothes, but sort of in like a confident. I can't wait to see him kind of way. Hey, man. The next two words out of your mouth better be switch to and then for you, Jeffrey. So that's five words, okay? I want to switch two.

Oh, I have two words for you. Get fucked. Oh, I'm going to get. It's fucked. Oh, yeah? Maybe I pay Mrs. Clause visit. Oh, yeah? Yeah.

We're together? Well, I don't know. Do you think I'm with her? I haven't really learned your mythology. She doesn't leave the house. She's a hermit. How could I hurt you? We haven't slept in the same room in 400 years.

Maybe I go out to the parking lot. Oh? Find one of your reindeer. Oh? Cook him up and eat them. You're going to eat and cook a Toyota tersel? Because that's what I came here on. You think I have reindeer?

You just told me the make a model of your car. Dumbass. Sold them for meat. Sold the deer's for meat. Hold on. Is that a threat? Yeah, that's a threat. Is that a threat?

If I don't get my... Hey, Toby! Ho-ho-ho! Yeah, what's up? Hey, I got a kid threatening me. You know, it's to make them on my car. Okay, you fucked my mom last night, so I guess you're on your own. Well, that bonds us, right?

I told you... You know, dude. We were getting a beer. You're asking about my... Don't tell anyone about that. How old's Toby? 17. Well, oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, boy, ho, boy.

Oh, ho, ho, boy. He wasn't sexual. Oh, boy, no, don't say it's not sexual. It wasn't, he fucked my mom. Don't say it's not sexual. I think it's the beer thing, not this. I don't think Toby, well, we don't even, we should even miss a pack of beer. We were throwing rocks at the mall, sounds.

And then he fucked my mom. Oh, I'm ruined. There's nothing wrong. It's not weird. He just fucked my mom. Toby, nobody's, nobody's saying that there's anything wrong with that. And real quick. a lot of kids ask, I had nothing to do with those Christmas time Kevin Spacey videos.

You know what he dressed up like the guy from You know how every Christmas. Why do you talk about this so much? I'm sorry, I didn't. I'm saying I didn't. I associate with you because you talked about it so much. Who? Who?

Don't, don't look it up. You gave a kid, okay, you gave a kid beer. You pull $3.50 a week. That means in two weeks you can buy me a switch package. Switch two. Well, no, because they're all out of stock. Get that kid to switch two. tell everybody about the beer and the mom.

That's, I'd have to bite on, like, Macari for, like, 675. Steal it, motherfucker. You drive a nice car. Santa doesn't steal. I don't know if you know anything about cars, Toby, but that's not a nice car. That's a car they haven't made in 30 years. Why did... Because they got it right the first time.

Why did my mom fuck you, man? You're a loser. She's a woman with agency, Toby. I mean, nobody forced her to fuck. Well, don't say that. I'll say nobody did. Listen, I'm going to head out Takes out a pack of palm malls.

You can't smoke here. Everyone, kids, everyone gets what they want. You can't as you say I'm going to head out. Let's do a big group photo. Let's do a big group one. All the kids are sort of adjusting their clothes with the group photo. I've been getting to work on all these motherfuckers in line. I know exactly.

All the kids are going like this. Oh, no. See. You didn't want to live in that another 40 minutes, Adel? I mean, I could have. That's 17th. Aaron's saying 17th. Completely fucked out.

Sorry, Adol. It's fake, though. It's fake. Oh, you shouldn't have to say that. Please. When Gertrude entered the plane, she caused her own death in the deaths of 200 people. Yet she was never blamed or criticized for her actions. What happened?

Gertrude is a Kaiju? Yeah, Kaiju. Godzilla type. Not this time. Gertrude is like a Mr. Magoo-ass pilot. ass pilot oh is this my sandwich is gertrude like a duck or like a goose or something

ooh yeah went to the engines yes gertrude a goose had been sucked into the jet engine i would like to see a scene before we see a scene did it not also say that nobody blamed gertrude for it well dead people don't blame when a goose gets sucked into a plane you absolutely say like that's what

happened right i know but you don't think like the goose was like did it on purpose okay okay i guess yeah you don't blame the goose in that way but you do say you do like literally blame it on the fact that a goose got stuck okay got i'd like to say i've changed a scene i want to see now i understand if anything they murdered a goose in its own home that's true you're in the goose's house yeah um i'd like to see a scene uh uh jpc you're a goose um who brought down a whole plane and you're drinking at a bar and adle you uh are one of the family members of someone who's on that plane and you recognize him at the bar and you go to confront him.

Yeah, so we've been doing okay, but it's... Can I get another four good fingers over here? Oh, my God. No, no, no, no, don't look, don't look, don't look, don't. Who is it? Thank you. That's fucking him, isn't it? That's one of the geese.

You should say something. He's counting on you not saying something. He's counting on you being too polite. This is good. What is this? This is well? This is good. Carol hated when I was confrontational.

But you know what? She's gone now. You're going to regret not doing this. Excuse me. Hi. Oh. Honk, I guess. Oh, what the fuck? Huh?

What the fuck? That's our word. That's our word. Hold on. You're the, I'm not the bad one here. Oh, yeah? You just walked up to a goose and said honk, honk. Hey, gentlemen, take it outside if you're going to fight, okay?

Yeah, let's go outside. Let's go outside. I'm actually, that's actually where I live. and I'm not ready to go home yet. Well, that's actually where I fight. That's where I work. So let me take off my jacket here, Canadian down. What the fuck?

Canadian goose coat here. Goose feathers in the lining. Everything I buy now is goose feathers. You're wearing a goose feather jacket around me? Yeah, that's right. Thank you. I got paid huge money for that. What?

We're very well paid to put the feathers. That kills us? Yeah, feathers are like your skin or something. Come on. No, man. Feathers are not like our skin. So this is like when I give a sperm sample. Tell him that he's playing, that you're,

tell him it's your, hey. What's your woman saying? No, I have an annex card for this exact moment. I knew this day would come. Webster's Dictionary defines revenge as, Hey man, if your chick has something to say to me, her hong, she can say it to me. Oh, Carol?

Punch his goose in the face. Oh, oh. Jokes on you, man. You hit beak. Your hand's a mess. Oh, let me try to hit you right in the stomach like Houdini. Whoa, three eggs came out. I'm a male goose. Yeah, oh, those are testicles. Oh, no. Seed.

The doctor said, if it doesn't feel better by twos-blank, to the pharmacy for more paink. Day-gobah. Day. Daigoba. Daigoba. Me say Daigoba. It is Daegoba, which is the... Can anyone tell me what the biome on Daegaba is?

That's Swamp land. Swamp land. Yota's a little swamp frog. Yeah. Yota's a little swamp frog. I knew that one. It's easy. I do want to see a scene.

Is he from there? I think he just, like, hid there, right? I think he lives in the swamp. I think he's embarrassed. And he's like, just visiting I am. Not my home this is. Clearing mugs. Yota, I just saw a pillow

And I see nothing you did No throw pillows here Brought these postcards on fridge from home I do this while traveling Yota I just saw a frog and lingerie hop away No no laundry and frog I do want to see a scene Yes

Aaron you are a What is Yoda Whatever that is They've never said A lot of Star Wars aliens have names But like Yoda is just a Yoda type alien basically Yeah Aaron you're a Yoda type

And you're on Degobah And JPC is just sort of a random traveler Whose ship broke down and you're gonna interact with him Great I don't think there's anything on this star system And I just can't fix the ship myself Mm-hmm Oh, hello, excuse me?

Adel, you can't be laughing at how bad I am at this. Hello, did someone say something? Excuse me? My ship broke down. I'm trying to get back to space, which is where I live. With that attitude, it might be hard for you to get back up in the air. Oh, oh, hi. My name is, let's see Star Wars name, Georg Babadu, And I, I'm trying to get back to space. Do you, do you have anything that could help me fix my ship?

Or are you from here? I'm sorry, I don't want to say. I'm sorry, I don't want to say. George, I make you nervous, I do. You nervous talking. You never seen a yoga with an open road before. A yoga with an open. Yoda with an open road before.

Uh, yeah, I would say it's. My robe is open. I'm yoga. It's very open. But no, that's fine. I mean, you know, I'm used to all different life forms. and all kinds of genitalia, so it's not, that's not a problem. Yeah, I'm just trying to, hey, actually, can you not, can you not eat those?

Those are my Twix. I was saving those for sustenance. You don't eat what he needs to get energy to fix ship. Oh, so you can fix my ship. You know how to, you know how to fix starships? There is no can. There is only twicks. Well, there actually is a can.

Dr. Pepper that you're drinking and you got that out of my Cockpit. I actually, yeah, I was gonna I was injured. You go ahead. You're salivating a lot into it. You go ahead and finish that. So what did you or deal? Oh, I'm married. Yeah, I'm super, I'm super married. I'm not hitting on, your does not hitting on you. Got it broke your form out there.

Kind of made me getting flustered. I'm sorry. Yeah. Hey, listen, man. I have to be. be honest with you. You landed and I started talking and I panicked. And I picked a voice that was not sustainable. Can I tell you guys? I got super high the other day and thought about home alone for some reason. I have a new theory. Which is that Kevin McAllister was a sleeper agent and he was activated because he's a little boy who knows how to... All right, weed has to be illegal again. I'm calling it. Yeah, they need to take it away.

we listed some more of these animal parade riddles that we did last time I was in charge. And I love these. Can I just say? I love these. Wait, sorry, is old man puzzles in charge all of a sudden? Is old man puzzles the one that is allowed to make the final call? Like, if I got really hurt and had a medical situation right now, would you get to make the choices for me because you're old man puzzles? Do you become like the default?

DNR. Do you not resuscitate? Oh, is that what that means? You didn't even ask what was medically wrong with me. I don't like that Don't ask, don't tell, Larry Don't ask, don't tell DMB

Not my business, just kill her I don't need to know It's a broken arm asshole Sir, she's up in bed and talking No, DNR What the fuck is an arm asshole I mean if that breaks You're pretty fucked right

I don't even know that I had one Adel you're gonna be making all my medical choices Addle you are the default old man puzzles You created the show. You were the first old man puzzles. So if anything goes awry here, I think you need to take over. You're saying I have power of attorney. I regret bringing any of this up.

Several times a day, people from all over the world visit me. Some may think I'm dirty, even on my best day, but no one wants to live without me. A bathroom. Bathroom. I mean, you pretty much got it. Toilet. Toilet. Toilet.

It's a toilet. Whoa. I can live without a toilet. I would say, you're a toilet. At all. At all. At all. I was in your wedding.

I was in your wedding, man. Come on, man. I stood next to you while you got married. Aaron, your toilet, jesus are a toilet. You're a toilet. Hey, I still love you both. What is this scene? It's just a guy turned.

in a toilet? You both take turns turning into toilets and pooping each other's mouths. I've called you trying before. Hold on. You teach improv. Adel, you teach improv. The scene that you called for is you're a toilet and I'm pooping in her mouth? Adel.

The last time I had a panic attack, I texted you. Yes, yes, but listen, hey. But just in general, a premise for a scene is like you threw her at a party and the layon is like, and you both. You're, like, figure out that you dated the same X, but your whole scene is just, she's the toilet and I'm pooping in her. This is more like fetish content than a seed. Heard, chef. Okay, so, you two were friends.

You find out you dated the same guy. That's the thing I just said. That you were asking for, right? I'm giving you what you're asking for. Okay. So you both, your friends, you both found out you're dating the same guy. Now, quick little caveat. There's a layout.

Every full moon, one of you turns into a toilet and the other one shits in its mouth. At all. Okay. What am I saying that's so taboo? This is a scene. And don't forget. And then a few seconds later, the other person turns to the toilet and the person who was the toilet turns into a human and shits in their mouth. Yes.

But you both find out you dated the same guy. Yeah. And that's, yeah, and that's sort of the entree into the scene. Okay. Crazy that full moon's over, huh? No, it's back. Full moon. We see a full moon. What do you mean? It's back.

It's back. A full moon doesn't go away. You're talking about sunrise. You're saying you guys are up at 6 a.m. Yeah. No. Adel, you bought everyone a ninja creamy because I wanted one. Yeah, I'm bad with money. And that doesn't mean that my premise should be shot down. Okay. You're both toilets. You found out you dated. You once said that you'll take me everywhere you go. That I'm one of your favorite people. and that anywhere you go, I go too. I just want to see my seat. Okay?

I love you both so much. I would do anything. I would die for both of you. I don't know. Okay. Sometimes it doesn't feel like it. But all I want to say would turn. You understand why it doesn't feel like it when he said,

okay, Aaron, your toilet and GPS is getting shit in your mouth. I understand that it doesn't feel like it. But you have to understand how it's coming across to us. There's a way to do. do it that's like fun for everyone and I feel like if you give it it you're judging it you do it show us how to do it show us how to do it yeah you do it you do it alone

and show us how to do it no because I'm going to knock it out of the park right those who can't teach oh those who can't teach at all I want to see you see you're a toilet who shits in its own mouth yes and it's the full moon and you're at a party that's the dumbest fucking premise I ever heard you two are toilet

you two are toilet best friends Hey guys, we're sort of at the comedy point where we know we can't end the episode unless someone does this scene, right? Okay, compromise. Compromise. Compromise. That's so smart. It's healthy. You're both toilets and you find out that the same guy shit in both your mouths and go. Okay. Compromise. Compromise. No, no. Aaron, that is a compromise. That's a scene. Okay, but I, can I add one little add on to it? I'm sure. Yeah, please. Adel, you are also there. You are also a toilet. Solidarity. We go in together. But brand new, but brand new. Surin Wrap. Nobody's touched me. No, no. Brand new. Brand new. Brand new. Brand new. Brand new. It has to be. Spotless. Never, virginal. Virginal.

Never been touched. This is an awesome party. This is crazy. Did you guys have the chlorox? It's not a party. Hold on. It's not a party. He said it was a party.

What would toilets be celebrating? Oh, they're friends of virgin. Biggest shit. What? She's a virgin toilet who can't drive. Yeah. It's Megan's coming out party. Someone's going to shit in her mouth,

you know later today and kind of chris and her do you guys try the chlorox it's so good it's so good it's blue it's like okay i'm trying to stay hydrated though so i've been drinking a lot of pee today adult we're doing the thing you wanted i just talked about drinking pee hold on hold on hold on quick time out it sounds like you're both being sarcastic the way you guys are talking is like you like you're like have you trying the chloroics oh my god like you're talking as if you're at a party we're being social we'll skip to it we'll skip to it we'll skip to it We'll skip to it. We'll skip to it. Skip to what? Oh, my God. Jerry's here.

Oh, my God. This is crazy. You're never going to believe this. Okay, here we go. I dated Jerry. A couple weeks ago. What? Did you date Jerry, too? No, you were about to say something else. No, I never dated Jerry. We had like a thing, but it was never like, it was not like a serious.

We didn't, like, label it as, I got wasted and Jerry. Yes, say what he did? well he you know he did what he did what you do do a toilet say it say it say the whole thing pause say the full thing yeah jerry you know he shit in my mouth yes yes oh my god he said that he would never do that with anyone else besides me what yeah yeah

yeah say say the thing here he said that your double water flush button was just for him just for him oh my god he sold he said the same fucking thing Unbelievable. That same line. Jerry? Can you come here for a second? Adel, you're Jerry. Uh, yeah, what's up?

Can you come down here, come a little closer, a little closer to the ground? Yeah, what's up? Dunks your head, gives you a swirly, swirly, swirly, swirley, scene, scene, scene, see, no, no, Jerry. Swirley, no. Other toilet, swirly, swirly, swirley, swirley, swirley, swat and head. Now it's fucking death proof, and Jerry is getting... Beat and head. Yeah, beat and head, Jerry.

Jerry. A piece of shit. Piece of shit, Jerry. Scene, scene. I can't imagine doing a bad improv show. Thank you, Casey. And this is a podcast where it's two in the morning. You go into the kitchen, turn on the light.

This podcast scuttles under the fridge. Oh, yeah. And you go, tomorrow I got to call somebody about this podcast. This podcast is like when you can hear something under your front porch. And then so you have to lift up one of the, um, to see what's under the front porch. And then it's under there, the podcast's under there, and its eyes are like really beady in the dark, and it's like...

The podcast feels cornered. Yeah. This is the podcast that is the can of pinto beans deep within your cabinet, and it's got like dust all over it, and you blow the dust, and you go, oh, certainly this has to be expired. And then you check the back, and it's like 2045, and you're like, how can pinto beans be good for this long? Well, they're always good this long If they're Goya

Goia beans Let them collect dust And have them in a pinch I think the Goya guy is like a Trump guy right Never mind Any other beans Any other beans in the world Any other beans by any other name

Would Smell as Sweet Don't buy Beans beans Don't buy Goya beans Unless something has changed From like 11 years ago When I heard about Goya beans

This podcast is like When you There's like an ashtray outside and people have been putting cigarettes out in it and then it rains we're like the water in the ash tray and that is like sort of the vibe of our podcast this podcast is like when you're on a flight and you have like a 20 ounce bottled water and you take a little sip and then you go to put it in the back of the seat but then it falls on ground and then the plane kind of does a tip and that rolls forward under the seats and you're like oh no and then someone looks behind like

you just kick me and it's like can I get that my water bottle my water just Can I get... Did she just kick me with this water bottle? That's what this podcast is. This is just going to be a quick solo scene. Adel, you're going to be playing Harry Ferry. You've got to stop doing impressions while people are doing things or else you're just going to get called out.

It's going to go right into break. Adel, you're going to be Harry Ferry and you're calling a baseball game. Top of the ninth, two out, two strikes, two balls. And, hey, if you believe in this game, clap I would ever want to clap clap if you believe in the game wow what a great

what a great game Smith of a walking Melting it to Christopher walking Break break break break break break break break It's funny It's funny I'm always thinking about it this time of year But I'm not as young as I once was

But I care a lot about maintaining my physical and mental wellness which means cornbread hemp, CBD gummies are a huge piece of my wellness plan. It's so funny, I have no idea why it gets to be this time of year, and I'm thinking about how I'm not as young as I once was. Oh, same girl, same, but also JPC, your birthday's in December. Okay, that makes sense. Well, JPC, someone left something under the tree called Cornbread Hemp, CBD Gummies. Have you heard of these?

Do you seen these? Uh-huh, yes, I have. They're made to help you feel better, whether it's stress, discomfort the encroaching clock of aging or relaxation relaxation i use cornbread hemp CBD and gpc let me just say toss one in my mouth i chew it i swallow it and suddenly i'm at peace and i'm old as hell all products are third-party lab tested in USDA organic to ensure safety and purity so you can relax relax okay you guys might be on to something with this cornbread CBD do me.

John Travolta? John Travolta. Twin? CBD? That's awesome. And right now, hey, Riddle, riddle listeners can save 30% on their first order. Just head to cornbread hemp.com

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My child is dressed. My wife says, I say, I'm going to go upstairs and take a shower. I come downstairs. And my wife says, you are not wearing that to Thanksgiving. And I said, well, I thought I was going to wear this. And she said, no, you go upstairs and change it. You change it to something nice. And I went upstairs.

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Wait, but you're, you talked all about wanting to be the early bird. I know. Well, what I say and what I do is two different things. There's quite a discrepancy. You've been practicing the worm all year. You said you were going to get out of bed, flop down on the floor, and start writhing around. I know. I love breakdancing, but I guess I didn't get it. I got to get up more early.

Oh, you know what else I need to do early? Acorns early. Ah. Oh, wait, you mean acorns early, the smart debit card and money app that grows kids' money skills as they grow up. That acorns early? Yeah, when my kids get out of their eggs, out of the nest, I want them to be prepared and set up for success in the world. That would have changed my life because I was growing up being like, why aren't they teaching us how to handle our finances in schools? They're kind of just throwing us to the wolves when we turn 20 and I don't know anything about money.

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One, two, three, four, hate riddle riddles, glue crew. Okay, next, I'm very, I'm curious about this next lady. This is ragdoll. Come on in ragdoll. Ah, can someone lift up my neck? I can't see.

Yeah, I mean, we're not supposed to really assist with the audition. If you need us to, we can't. If you're, like, in dismay. Blings head backwards. Oh. Yeah, this is an audition to join towel and be a superhero. Yeah, I know. I thought you could use me.

What's up? My name's Ragdoll, buttons for eyes. That much is obvious. And I'd like to tell you that I, I would be a great fit for towel. I know what you're thinking. I bet she can't get hurt because she's sort of a rag doll. She gets thrown around like a rag doll.

It would be a great. An awesome thing to have a member of the team that can't get hurt. I'm not sure. I have bones and blood like the rest of you. I just move like this. But you're small. I'd say you're no more than 10 inches tall and you look like you made out of a cut-up mop.

cut up, mop, yarn, sort of felt, paper mache, nose. There's bones and blood and organs and tissue in there, huh? Yeah, there's all the stuff you got, reproductive organs. Oh, I do see, it looks like written on the bottom of your foot, it says Tammy. Yeah, Tammy is a bitch I man at a bar. I asked her to give me a... Can we use that for official superhero merch? Yeah, I asked her to give me a piece-side tattoos

Because she's given her free tattoos in the parking lot She wrote Tammy on my foot I thought it was like a beer bottle I was like a kid who owned you or something But yeah that makes way more And I'm not a kid I'm not a kid I know I look very small I'm a kid

Was she given tattoos with Sharpie This appears to just be written on in Sharpie Yeah but look at the texture of my skin This is there forever brother Yeah you're right God that is And I went through the wash ones But remember, I got bones and organs and all that stuff. I ended up having an episode in going west after I got put in the watch, full of existential dread.

Okay. In the dryer, too. I don't want to dismiss Ragdoll out of hand because I'm, obviously. No. Was that your power? You are a little bit on fire. Power. Yeah, the light, I'm sorry.

Let me dim the light I'm shining on you. I think I'm cooking you alive. Yeah. Power. Uh-oh. Oh, yeah. So if you do have a super power, we're also going to want to know that as well. I move like a rag doll. That's the power. It feels more like a super.

Oh, every time she moves like. I'll just say drawback. I feel like that's the most polite and kind way to say that. Why? No one can predict how I move. I sort of. Oh, I heard some bones snap. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No amount of calcium to keep these bones safe in the way that I'm moving. I know you have bones. Why are you tossing yourself around like a ragdoll?

This is how I have to walk. That's right. I have the proportion of a rag doll. I look like a rag doll. Again, though, I feel everything. I'm feeling all of this. Can I smoke in here? No, please no.

Can I ask you about your superhero origin? How did you come to be a, like a 10-inch tall rag doll that has human bones? I mean, probably same as how you got your power. Okay. That bitch Tammy from the bone. I was hit by a truck containing a big supply of light. Big boot? I was obviously crafted in the lab by an eccentric plastic surgeon.

And I had cold brew that was too strong. And now I can read minds. Wait, wait, hold on, hold on. We simply cannot find that cold brew. That had a mad of mind. Yeah, what's up? You're telling us that you can read minds. Shake my cold brew.

Because you had cold brew that was too strong one time? Yeah. You know when you overly caffeinate and all of a sudden you can hear people's minds? So is your thing that you have to keep drinking the... Can I smoke in here? No. No. Hold on. No. You have to keep drinking the cold brew or you just... Now you're just drinking cold brew, like, as a person who's drinking cold brew.

I'm just drinking cold brew as a person that's drinking cold brew. I forgot to mention that we all have the voice-style chairs and we have to turn around when we are all in agreement. I think we like Radical go. I don't think we all like Ragdoll, right? I think that's a huge yes for me. Hits the button, my chair turns around. Whoa, I didn't know if you look like that. Hits button turned the back around. The chair whips around so quick you spill out of the chair.

Oh. Whoa, whoa. Hey, that's a little rude. Can I smoke in here? No. All right. Well, whatever. Tammy and I are going to go get some whiskeys.

She's still with Tammy. I thought she was a bitch. She is a bitch. Okay. I will cover some. Like, covers Mike. I will say, Tammy is the bitch I met at a bar. It's my favorite catchphrase so far.

Yeah, I just don't think with the volatile nature of Ragdoll and Tammy's relationship, I just don't think we can afford to have either one of them on the team. Yeah, that makes sense. Tammy in the wings, sheds one single tier and, like, blinks it away. All right, come on, Tammy. Crack bones. Tammy flies across stage. Whoa, Jimmy and the wings.

Tammy and the wings. That would have been amazing. She could have dropped Ragdoll on a pole. Oh, okay. Burger, hot dog. Cheeseburger. What do you want? You do cheese hot dog?

Melted American cheese on a hot dog? No. No, just a regular hot dog or cheeseburger. Sorry, man. You seem really nervous. Oh, by the way, Kyle. I've lived in this house, but 15 years with the misses. We got two little ones.

I know that you moved in recently. Welcome. Yeah, just me. Great. Love it. Your beautiful house. Jorgon. Jordan. Jordan.

Jordan. Nice to meet you, Jordan. Love it. I mean, my wife, she went to like every open house because she was just obsessed. It's like a great fixer up her. Yeah, it's cool. It's got wood. It's got wood.

Floors and walls. Yeah. Yeah, beautiful. You're going to restore those, I assume. You bought a historically protected house. Yeah. Really excited to see what you do with it. yeah for sure well Jordan um Jordan Jordan Jordan Jordan yeah like Michael Jorgen

Michael Jordan yeah how's a hot dog come so you want a you want a burger with cheese or a hot you want both you want both um hey man don't be nervous oh yeah I know we seem like a pretty close-knit community we're doing stuff like this all the time like we'll I've never had neighbors before great oh yeah it's easy it's just like we'll mow each other's lawns we'll if someone needs like a cup of sugar when they're baking Should I have done, should I, should I have most, no, it's sort of, no, it's a given, you'll, you'll be able to feel it. It's like jazz. Like being a good neighbor is like being able to be good at jazz. You sort of know when to be present and no one to leave them alone. How much, how much, how much is, how much is this? How much for the. Oh, it's free. I mean, we all pay, uh, everyone. Everyone pays everyone? No, no, like, uh, like three weeks before this, it was before you moved in, as he came around and everyone sort of gave like whatever they could. Sometimes, sometimes.

people give like a hundred bucks, 80 bucks. Sometimes people do more. A hundred bucks for a hot dog? No, no, for the whole block party. Sort of it pays for like the music and the food. Pays for the music. In the bouncy house for the kids and the water balloon fight. How much $100 music?

No, I mean, I don't, I'm not a part of the planning committee. What if I just move your loan all year? No, I'm not, I'm not the one that you would pay even. Okay, so I got to find somebody else to pay. Yeah. Like the Sullivan's are the ones who organize it. They're really... I think I'm going to go home and draw the shutters and just kind of...

Hey, no, man, you're doing great. I don't think so. No, you're doing really good. I think I've embarrassed myself. No, I mean, Jordan, you've come over here. I think you're being really brave. My name's Michael. You panicked and...

Yeah, because I wanted to say like Michael, like Michael Jordan. I said Jordan, but I meant Jorgon. Or no. My name's Michael. And you wore a Halloween costume over here. I got the dates wrong. Yeah, it's the middle of summer. Well, yeah, of the block party, I got the date, right, I got the dates of Halloween wrong.

I've never had neighbors before, so I didn't really know when Halloween was. I've only lived in apartments and we didn't do Halloween. Right. Because it was a walk-up. Sure. And I think that, you know, Michael, I think you're doing better than you think. You're doing, this is hard, and I totally get it. And you seem like a really sweet introvert that, like, wanted to restore a historical home.

No. I didn't know about the historical home part either. Well, you had to, like, sign a bunch of paperwork that said that you weren't going to make any changes that ruined the integrity of the house. This house was a gift. I'm who? My uncle. Oh, okay. Yeah. Well, um, my wife actually is, like, knows a lot about that stuff. Okay. Um, our home is historically protected as well. She'll give you all the resources. Okay, I can mow her lawn for a year. No, you don't have to do any of that. This is what being a neighbor is. She's going to help me for free. Yeah, she'll, she'll give you some advice.

Oh. But not help. Oh, no, that's what helping is. Okay. I'll just talk about it. Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm, I'm You're leaning on my grill, too. That's got hurt. Some of us know what we want. Okay, just give me $100 worth of hot dogs and hamburgers. No, no, no. I think I have to go home. Michael.

I have to definitely go home because my hands all burnt. I'm going to give you a normal amount of food on your plate. You're going to go. Can you grow potato chips? What? Can you grow potato chips? No, I'm just going to put the normal potato chips on the plate. I know.

It's great. We're going to put stuff on your plate. Okay. You're going to, here, wrap your hand on this paper towel. Should I mingle with people? No. Okay. I would go sit.

See, there's... Sit in the grass. No, no, not the grass. Find a chair. Grasses for children and animals. Okay. Go find a chair. My house?

No, no. Bring my chair out. No, no, no. Look, I'm pointing right now at the chair on my deck. See, there's a few of the neighborhood dads are up there. It's talking golf. Can I go on the deck, the upstairs deck? No.

No, that's only access from the primary bedroom. I'll walk through the bedroom. No, you're not going to do that. Can I take a... Can I just go to sleep? Can I just go to sleep before. I get it, buddy. This is so overwhelming.

I know. Can I just sleep in your room? No, take a plate of food. I'm going to give you a Coca-Cola, and you're going to walk up to the deck. You're going to sit with those guys. You see those guys over there? Those are tall guys. Yeah, they're, I mean.

Those are really tall guys. There's one that's 5-11, and he's the tallest. So. Hey. Here's an movie. See, look, they're waving at you. They're waving at you. They're going to want to talk about golf. They also have a jam band.

I'm going to take a plate of grilled chips. No. An open Coke. Nope. I'm going to go to your bed. No. I'm going to sleep for an hour. No.

Then I'm going to go out of the balcony. Nope. I'm going to jump. No. I'm going to jump off the balcony. Michael. It, that you wouldn't even get hurt. I could get hurt. No, it's not that high up.

I fall on my fingers. Hey, you know what? I could really hurt my fingers. No. This was nice. I'm so overwhelming. Michael. Michael, also, you talk to those guys.

There's a few of them. Oh. There's like several single ladies. Your name is Michael Clayton. Your name's Clayton. My name's Clayton. I was thinking Michael Clayton. I said Michael Jordan.

go talk to those guys up on the... It's not Clayton. It's Leighton. They're really sweet. They love the neighborhood. My name's... My name's Meester. Meester. Leighter Meester. Meester? There's lots of single ladies in the neighborhood. My name's Deeds.

Mr. Deeds. Just deeds. Deeds. Is your name Adam? My name's Adam. Yeah. My uncle died. Sure. Buying this house.

Yeah. And I kind of swooped in at the last minute. I actually think you're doing better than you think you are. We're going to introduce you to some beautiful ladies. It's the summer. You know, you know, I'm relaxing? Have a beer. Here's a beer. Catch. Uh-oh. Oh.

Okay. So I should go find that? No. No. I'll give you another beer. I'm going to hand it to you. Ready? One.

No. Kick it to me. Two. No. If you put it on the ground and kick it over to me, it's going to be way easier. You're literally an arms. I'll drop it. I'll drop it.

I'm going to roll it over to you. We're going to pretend this is a ha-ha-ha-ha-futting us that we do. Okay. So you're going to introduce me to a woman? She's going to introduce herself to you. Just go up there, be mysterious, smile, nod. They're going to love you. Got it.

Say your name is Adam. My name's Deds. Say my name's Adam. Say Adam. Okay. Good luck. Thank you so much. I'm watching.

What was your name? I don't know. Okay. Hi, welcome back to I will knock you. I'm coming to you from the local dive bar where I am going to get into some fights with people who definitely deserve it. Hold on, hold on. You have to spends. My name is Michael, and I'm not drunk.

My first guest is a guy sitting next to me. Excuse me. Excuse me. Hey, come on. Hey, come on. Knock it off. Excuse me, sir? Knock it off.

Do you have a freaking problem with me? Michael, I don't have a problem with you. You do this every week. Do I? Because I have a show to produce every week. I will knock you. There's a camera. Put the graphic in here.

Put the graphic in here Graphic of what? Talking to my line producer. Put the graphic in here. Okay, let's, can we cut him off? Can we cut him off, please? Me? No.

From the bar? No. You're over-served. Michael, come on, man. We've known each other. We went to college together. Come on. I will knock you.

Stop having so many faces so I know which one to punch. Stop it. I'm a triple. He's technically not over-served. He's only had one drink. I just think it's a reaction to his medicine. I'll have a lot of one drink is a reaction to my medicine. I can only stop after three tricks, so legally I have to conserve it if he asks.

Joel, this is not how you run a bar. I told him not to take the medicine. Another mojito, please, Job. You have two-thirds of your mojito. Job, but I drink fast because I have a straw, and I drink faster. I'll make you another mojito. And guess what, after that? I'm going to knock you.

That's not going to happen. To the ground, I'm going to punch you. I know you were a Marine. Jobl. Oh, Jobb was a Marine. Jobb has big arms. I'm going to knock you down, Jolbl. Hey, everybody, it's me, Norm.

Norm. Norm, I will knock you down to the ground, Norm. Oh, Michael, you old so-and-so. You're still making that show here? What's up, buddy? High-five. Tries to high-five, goes to punch,

falls into the ground. Oh, Michael. What happened? He used to fuck with Catwoman. So now I feel like every time I'm turning around, you know, a corner, I'm like, is Catwoman going to come out of nowhere and just like, you know. This is so crazy. And like, you should be even more scared of her.

But she goes to my Zumba classes and she's like crazy strong. In the outfit with the whip? Oh, yeah, of course. I know. And she looks like so good. And I'm in the mirror and I look like a wet rat, kind of like sweating in the mirror. And I'm like, oh, my God, she looks amazing. Don't talk about my friend like that.

Hey, hey, I know. I mean, I went to class and that's what matters, right? Yeah. That's what matters. I saw a car almost hit her one time and I was like, oh, my God, yes, it's happening. She did 13 somersaults in the air, landed on all fours, scuttled into the sewers. Like, that's incredible. Like, my life would change if I could do that.

Her ass looked amazing the whole way through. Didn't break a sweat, I'm sure. So anyway, Robin was going down on me for like three hours. I just could not. make me come. And the last one is Stop that laughing at the back, which is my favorite one listed. Stop that laughing at the back.

Okay. Okay, everybody take a seat. Quiet, down, okay? Okay. This is about what happened yesterday. This is not funny. I cannot stress this enough. This is not

Look at me. This is not funny. Your teacher, hey. Hey. Is he going to be okay? No, he farted himself to death. Now, hold on. I didn't know it was to death.

This is being streamed to the whole town, and this is very serious. Okay? You were the last class that he had. You guys saw it go down. The authority Hey Question Yeah

Could we just laugh for like No You can't get it out of your systems You can't Why not? Because yesterday Can you imagine the hell Of dying

By far And there's an entire classroom Of children Not calling for help Not running for help But laughing in your face That's the last sound He heard

Well not the last sound I mean yes We lived it We lived it. We can imagine it. He hit the ceiling. We have the footage. We know the momentum.

Play it. Play it. No. No. Stop the laughing at the back. Play it. Play it. Hey.

You simply must play the footage. No. We will in a minute. We will in a minute. Because we all need to talk about what happened. We're going to do a play by play. And you're going to let me know what happened. Okay.

Okay. Well, you know what happened. He farted himself to death. What happened? before the farting. I guess teacher was making a weird face and holding his tummy. Yeah.

And then... This is not funny. I think we're telling we're telling you what happened. Everyone processes grief differently. Yeah, he broke the fluorescent light by flying up to the ceiling. He said something like, the exact quote was like,

I shouldn't have so much jelly. Hey, stop. And then I guess after that... Stop. That's what he sounded like. After that was the first fart and then the class hamster died. We know. Double tragedy.

And I know it's not funny. We don't know that he died. He died. He held up a little sign that said, Icarumba. And then he keeled over. Hey, stop. Stop it. Stop it.

Which of the farts, how far in, was the one that blasted him back into the chalkboard? Stop. Stop. Stop! Stop the laughing in the back! It was all the farts. Every fart blasts into the chalkboard. Look at the hole.

You're seeing the hole. It was a process. You think you get a four-foot divot and a chalkboard? This was not just a teacher. He worked for it. This was not just a teacher. This was a father. This was a husband.

This was a volunteer firefighter. This was someone who did community theater at night. Yes. Can I ask something? It showed in his performance. Declan, what? About 12. the 13 minutes in, all

the other teachers came into the classroom and also watched along. Are they in trouble as well? Are we in trouble? You're the biggest trouble. You had, this was a 50 minute episode. You had 50 minutes to call 911, call for an ambulance, run and get help

from me, the principal. You could have done anything and he died because you guys were laughing and laughing. Hey, stop it. In our defense, it was riveting. Stop it. It was the best 50 minutes on my life. hell he had community theater chops because of kind of how he was milking it and hamming it up to a certain degree.

He wasn't. He was in agony. He was making sounds that didn't necessarily equate to agony. Like, what? Like, don't make me do it. A wooga. A wooga. Stop me in the back.

How'm gonna, I'm gonna help me. How'm gonna, how'm gonna help me? Doink. He said doink a lot. And he was saying doink. Yeah, and he kept saying, my pants. Oh, my pants. Speaking of his pants, how far did his pants blow off?

Well, they were Carhart, so they lasted longer than this good. They lasted much longer. Built farm tough. Yeah. Don't. But it wasn't really that the pants blew off in one burst. It was more that they were shredded as the... His family is planning a funeral right now, and they don't know what to say.

They don't know what to put in the paper. I would say don't do open casket. Close casket for sure. His ass was ruined. Stop that laughing in the back. Stop it. People are watching this at home. Why?

Because we're holding you accountable. This is being streamed out? Yes, of course. At one point, he went in the air like, you know those wind tunnels that you can go into? You're wearing a suit where you can open your arms or close them? Yeah, indoor skydiving. Indoor skydiving. At one point, it was like 50 minutes of that, and it was beautiful.

He looked like an angel. He tried to use the eyewash station, and he blew all of the water back into the eyewash station and then it corroded the spout that it was coming out of like it was the stinkiness was like acidic in some way okay let's just try to get the timeline right what order do you remember happening you walked into the classroom and then what happened sat down a big bowl of chili sat down a big bullet chili on the desk i would say that you said it was cheese no it was chili but there was definitely cheese in it yeah i don't think that what came out of him would have been possible without the assistant stop that laughing in the back

I also want to mention I don't know if anyone has gone on record but at some point it got so bad he put his finger in his I don't know the medical term butthole and then he got a real funny face and he started coming out his mouth

and he clipped his hand over his mouth and then it started coming out of the butthole then he did hand over the butthole start coming out of his penis stop laughing in the back then it came out of his ears well it wasn't steam it was farts but it looked and sounded like the whistle of steam

and then he clapped his hands over his ears and his eyeballs bulged out with farts. Like a looney tune. And at some point... I wouldn't say like a littington. It was very human. Yeah. Like the mask, maybe. Yeah, like the mask. Stop laughing in the back. He kept saying I'm being cooked alive. Stop.

And then he tried to open the windows. He did. Which I thought was very kind. And then you guys closed them to keep the pressure in the room. That's not why we closed them. We opened the window. And then he unfortunately did see a very pretty. lady out on the street and I think

he was getting horny well it doesn't matter if he's married he's a man he was getting horny he was a red blooded American man he was getting horny by seeing a and we don't know if the woman could have been his wife because I know his wife works close by but he was getting very horny and he was starting to make a wuga a wuga

his face turned wolfish I would say unrelated to the fart well no but the horniness was mixing with the farts and it was creating sort of an unholy blend Stop that laughing in the back. Stop that laughing in the back. At one point he did call the hospital. He did.

He got the hospital on the phone. But he was farting so much they thought it was a prank and they hung up on it. And remind me again, what sign did the hamster hold up? Like caramba? Stop. Stop that laughing in the back. I made the sign for Spanish class. I don't know how the hamster got it.

It wasn't for him. But then on the reverse side, he turned it around and it said, die, caramba. And then he, and then big accent. Big X's formed over his eyes. And then there's a big... I don't know where it came from, but there was sort of like a noise that was like...

sort of like Renan Stimpy when they should do a close-up of someone's armpit or something. Oh yeah, I didn't even associate that with the farting, but now that I'm thinking about it, that was definitely a noise that came out of him. One of the farts turned all the pages of the book that you guys were reading to a certain page.

What book was it and what did the page say? Stop that laughing in the back. Stop. We were reading the Catcher and the Rye and it blew some letters off of the... cover and turned it into the farder smells like sty.

Okay, so other books got blown onto the book, yeah, uh-huh. You want to think of maybe another one? Sure, and I could think of one more. Um, hmm. Oof, okay. Madam Bovary, shit. And, uh, fuck. We were reading the giver and I got changed to the shitter.

Yes. We don't know where the S and the H in the... And we don't have all the answers to these questions. Okay. Well, you guys will be assigned a new teacher. No, we want our old teacher. Oh, that's right. Did he leave us like a VHS or something to play?

Stop to laughing. I forgot he died. Did he leave us like a VHS to play in case of death? He did. He wanted me to roll in the TV into the classroom and show you guys a video. Have you see the video yet? I know what it is. You're laughing.

You haven't seen it. Is it going to be like sports bloopers where it's like and it's going to be him farting? Yes. I forgot. I forgot he died because he did, he stopped farting and he said, oh, I'm okay. I don't know what that was. And he walked out of the classroom and then we heard him kind of fart and like bang off

of a thing from the like a rocket ship going on the hallway. At some point, he hit the ceiling fan at some point. Yeah. Yeah, you could hear him hitting lockers. Yeah. And then what happened was, I know what happened. He blew back through the wall with a Kool-Aid man. Yeah.

And he did say, well, he said, oh, no, he screamed. Oh, no. He blew back through the wall, left again, went out to the parking lot. And then his fart blew him up. into the... Oh my God, I'm crying. I cried to think about it. Oh, my gosh.

Did you know him? He got electric cutted. Yes, I've known him 20 years. He's worked at the school. He got electrocuted. He got blown into all the wires. He got blown into all the wires. And he kept going.

It was kind of like, as he went up, it was kind of like, what's it called in Dr. Strangelove? We all know what you're referred to. Slim Pickens? Slim Pickens. You know what we're going to do. But it was reverse slim pickens just going up into the clouds. I hope you earned a valuable.

lesson about actually asking for help. Yes. This is sort of a bystander effect that no one We have learned our lesson. Okay, great. And let's just do a moment of silence. Can we watch the video? We can, but one moment of silence in honor of the teacher. Well, we haven't had a moment in silence in five minutes. Okay, when he was dying.

Do not laugh. Don't laugh in the back. Okay, moment of silence. Oh, his family's coming in. Yep. This is super serious. Nobody laugh. Do not laugh. Do not laugh. Do not laugh. They're in morning. Ready? This is his family? It's a moment of silence starting now Why are they all eating chili Is that to honor his memory? Does the whole family really like chili?

Stop asking questions Okay but I'm just wondering because they're eating a lot of chili Oh no Too much chili Oh no it's happening again I'm eating too much chili Sorry no I made the video start playing Turn off turn off turn off

Turn it off Well he's eating chili in the video too I don't think this is on us scene And Casey, cut that. We don't need it. Danny, we done did it. We're back to what we did before.

Wait, does that mean, does that mean purgatory is over? I don't know. Let's go on a new adventure, you and I. What was that that you just did? And as you lean in for a second kiss. You can't reject, you cannot leave me alone in that. That's the meanest. thing ever that is being abandoned on my birthday level mean i just don't i just don't remember i'm still

half a suit store that is sort of booking a week long cruise together and then one of you backs out that is and i'm on the boat for one of you to be like we're not we don't kiss anymore that was never a thing that is jpc that is brutal that's not like i got invited to the movies by people in my class and i went to the movies and saw the movie and they're like we changed your mind and went to a different movie. Like that level of like absolutely cut down. What are you guys talking? Aaron, stay in it. What is you guys talking about? Adel, you are bare Jesus Christ and you are about to perform a bear miracle. Everyone, everyone. You see this water? Can everyone see the water? Yeah, was it water or is it honey turned water to honey?

Oh, I have a so sorry. It was a very different consistency. I had some going down. Kind of viscous. Take this guy away. I was gargling with him. Give us bear robes. Give us bar robes.

You will put me in a cave and roll a rock in front of it and I'll hybridate and come out a few days later. A few days. That's normal. This is normal. Seen. These options are from British. children TV. Mm-hmm.

And here's what I'll say. I just realized how much I love when Brits say something along the lines of like, that's tasty, that, that, that's beautiful that. Yeah, that's so cute. That's so cute. That's tasty that. Whimsy, whimsy, whimsy. I mean, they also were colonizer.

Wow. Not the children, Aaron. Very quickly, we do need to say, not the little children. We can enjoy British culture, but don't forget. Of course, India. Yeah. That's tasty, that. I got a question for you about Brits before we really truly launch, Andrew.

Who is the British actor working today, who you think has the worst American accent? Oh, that's a good question. Can I say, I love Tom Hardy, but when he does American, it's like, I am American. Like, it's always just like... They all seem to be doing a Jason Statham. They do. American. Like, it's such a weird, like...

Has Statham ever done American accent? I don't know. What if Statham thinking? because he's doing an American accent in every movie he's doing. And, like, good job. His real voice is, like, super high-pitched and he's, like, definitely lowering it,

but it's still very British. When I was playing the beekeeper, I try to get into the mindset of me. When I was flying the baykeeper, then? It's Jason's day there, and he's got a big curly wig and a big apron on, and it's like, uh... That's tasty, that?

Dutch, touch, me. He's holding the handbag. He screams like E.T. E.T. ET is the one British actor who does a terrible American Found home I heard that ET is really rude to waiters too

He grabs butts He grabs butts Yeah ET stands for Ew Stop it I couldn't think of me Lower Clay Lower Kass

Capital T I will say Top it And I do think he's I do think he's a tremendous actor Who at ET? E T

I think E T's great Yeah E T's great. won the Oscar best supporting actor role in Michael Clayton right? Here's my thing about E.T. though. He jumped up on the seats and walked across. After the one

movie. That's the funniest joke to make. And then he dip kissed up Hallie Berry. And a Rossifarian cap? Adrian and Brody did both those things. Who did Adrian Brody introduce as a Rossifarian? Does he remember what band it was? I can't know. Oh, it's so funny though.

What was, who was? Then E.T. Was it someone that would make sense? Adele's Dazim. Soundgarden or something. Like, I don't know. It wasn't like Sean Paul or like it was literally soundgarten. I don't think it made sense. It didn't make sense. Okay.

E.T. can wear the Rastafarian wig because he's not from anywhere. Oh, Sean Paul. And it says the mom of Jamaican accent was definitely unscripted. And allegedly, Sean Paul was very pissed off by Adrian's introduction. What? Why? Did he not get the joke? 71 weeks this has been on the charts

For a while there, it was rough But lately, I've been doing better Then the last four cold Decembers I recall And I see my family every month I found a girl, my parents love Adel Counting Crows, cold December

Cold December It's been a cold December She'll come and stay the night And I think I might have it all And I thank God every day For the girl he sent my way But I know the things he did gives me he can take away.

And I hold you every night. And that's a feeling I want to get used to. But there's no man as terrified as the man who stands to lose you. Buzz. Oh, Adel. I think I'm going to hate myself if I don't at least try to say, Dahl, down beautiful. Is it that sound?

Hey, I don't know what that means. What is that? Dahl. Degg, it's a little fellow who does the backclips. It's beautiful. Yeah. It's like the. Goose.

Oh, is that the way? This is one I didn't look up for the show because I had no interest. I was like, I know I don't know this one, but yes, it is the little backflip boy. Benson Boone. Edel. Benson Boone. Do you know the name of the song? Don't.

Tunk. Sounds like a goose is singing in this song. Don't take blank blank that I got. Do you know that Benson Boone is three geese wearing a jumpsuit? It was really hard for them to learn how to do one back. Bread, bread, bread, bread, bread. If you pause the video where he's doing a backflip, you can see the three geese. You can see the three geese.

They never stop touching, but they come apart a little bit. I mean, their athletes for sure. His album is called Untitled Benson Project. With Goose crossed out. Genson Goose. Thank you, Casey. Genson Goose. Genson Goose.

It was right there. and John Patrick Collins Casey Tony to be editing memory parents in the music logo created by Emily Cardamus and Emily Neboros

One, two, three, four Hey, Riddle, Richon Hey, Riddle! Hey, there, Nordstroms and Racks, if you like that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. We explore what happens

in between Christmas and New Year's. You can listen to that, plus our entire bat catalog at patreon.com by joining the Clue crew for $5 a month or start your seven-day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month plus to get those ad-free episodes. See you there.

That was a HeadGum podcast. Hi, I'm Nicole Byer. Hi, I'm Sashir Zameda. And this is the podcast, Best Friends. And we're here at HeadGum. So this is just a podcast. where we just talk. Yeah.

We're best friends. Yeah. We talk. And then we have a segment where we answer questions and queries. Mm-hmm. So audience members can ask questions about friendships and we can answer them to the best of our abilities. Yes. We are professional friends.

We are professional friends. Subscribe to Best Friends on Spotify, Apple Podcast, PocketCast, or wherever you get your podcast and watch videos on YouTube. New episodes drop every Wednesday. That's the middle of a work week. I was deeply unhelpful to you during that whole thing. You are. I'm really sorry. I felt the support.

I was so, okay. I was trying to be supportive. Yeah. But I was like, I don't know, reading seems pretty hard right now. It's a lot. I think you did good. Thank you so much. You're welcome.