Hey Riddle Riddle - #41: Dr. Funny Comedy

Episode Date: May 1, 2019

Paging all Kevins and Susies! We reluctantly step into another batch of our favorite riddles and thereby enter a clown realm of madness! The gang also promotes a new cereal, redefines what cardboard can be and has a sincere conversation about the emotional consequences of lifting up one person by tearing down others....we swear this is a comedy podcast! #WiddleWednesday Look for tickets to our upcoming live shows at http://www.headgum.com/liveStarring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifEditing by: KJ SnyderTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgun podcast. Hey, before we get into the episode, a quick announcement, we have a show coming up in Lala Lands. Hold on, let the listener catch their breath. They were expecting the theme and now they're scared. I'm so sorry, we have a show in Moonlight. Yes. Oh, this is embarrassing.

This is embarrassing. Yeah. So we're going to be in Moonlight. What a fun joke from two years ago. We're going to be in LA. What's're gonna be in moon lights. What upon joke from two years ago? We're gonna be in LA. What's the day? Mother's Day. Sunday, May 12th.

And what's the time? 7 30 PM. And what's the place? It's the LA improv, don't you know? And you will be there. What's the Hollywood improv? Don't you know? I don't perform in LA.

I perform in Hollywood. And who will be there? JBC's mom. Yeah, my mom will be there. That's true. It is on Mother's Day. And who will be there? J.B.C.'s mom. Yeah, my mom will be there. That's true. It is on Mother's Day. Oh, my mom got jealous of that, by the way. She was like, I heard on the podcast of J.B.C.

Your mom got jail time? Jail time, yeah. Because then she killed J.B.C.'s mom. She said, jealous. So if you want to see one of our moms and one of our dead moms, then come to Heyver over to Live. It's 730 PM Sunday, May 12th at the Hollywood Improv. And if you want tickets, just go to headgum. over to live. It's 730 p.m. Sunday, May 12th at the Hollywood improv. And if you want tickets, just go to headgum.com slash live.

I'll be there. I'll have a cute outfit on. I'll have a great attitude. Adil will also be there. Adil, comment on a block of ice. He spoke to the federal police. It was the cat in an airplane. He sat in with an ice cream. And the horse made the ride. Oh, it's that time of year again to get your checkup by Dr. Funny Comedy. It's Hey Riddle Riddle, I'm Antler Fie. I'm Dr. Funny Comedy himself, JPC. And I'm Nurse Funny Comedy, Ericane. what's what's like above a doctor? God seal it. No, sealing I'm sealing funny comedy. Doctor

Frowning comedy nurse that funny comedy. Nothing's above a doctor. Maybe the law. No doctors above the law. They kill. Yeah, doctors kill. Most the answer to most riddles should be the doctor. The doctor killed the mother. The doctor killed the butt and suffered no consequences. Hello, everybody. Most, the answer to most riddles should be the doctor. The doctor killed the mother. The doctor killed the mother. And suffered no consequences. Hello everybody.

Hello everybody. Hello everybody. How are you two? Are you okay? I'm good. I'm great. Yeah, I'm okay now. They caught the guy, so.

Okay, yeah. Aaron, how you doing? I'm good. I'm okay, I think. Yeah. What were you in the hospital last four? Oh, that's a fun game. What was everyone in the hospital last four? I, that's a fun game. What was everyone in the hospital last four?

I was in the hospital a couple times this fall because I could get it. For fun stuff or? Yeah, for really fun stuff. No, I just, I have some uterus problems, but now I'm in a ton of debt because of my illness in the hospital. It's fun.

So it's aired in your 20s. Patreon.com slash. Hey, Rital Rital. We're trying to get Aaron and I. We are a comedy show. We, I trust me. We are a comedy show. So that's the last time I was in the hospital, that'll,

if we had 3000 patrons, we will get Aaron a new uterus. Please, it's scary. Last time I was in the hospital was to watch them pull my friend off my support. No, interesting. Yeah. I've got a fun one. The last time I was in the hospital was visiting a very sick friend.

So I think all three of us have a pretty special relationship with us. What a dark, what a dark fun way to start the episode. Dr. Fuddy Comedy. Paging Dr. Fuddy Comedy. Can we get this road on the show? Thank you, Aaron, for that 100% great joke that really brought us back in our full-end swing.

10CCs of comedy. Yeah, so if we're looking for comedy, don't worry about it. That's what we do here in Heyward Overdol. We also answer riddles and puzzles, which people hate. But we are, I'm going to be playing Old Man Puzzles on the show today. So I will be kind of walking you through some of my little nightmare scenarios. And we got a fun one cooked up, Dr. Your nightmares? Specifically your nightmares?

Yeah, these are specifically nightmares. Cause a lot of your nightmares are setting a clown realm, right? It's a lot of like your penis going into the clown realm. My, I think that's so specific that that's gotta be true for you. What do you think a clown realm is that only a penis could enter? I don't like this. No, I don't either. I don't either.

I just see like a gas station bathroom with a hole that marks a clown realm. Like, Adel's like, oh no! It's like a glory hole, but it says, Mom. Oh, I want to die. You pulling out and just has red nose on it? Oh, bam, bam. Oh, drag, drag, baby. Okay, I'm coming.

What a bad show, what a bad show. Okay, so today's kind of warm up ready and fuzzy is going to be from a listener. A listener has submitted some warm up retties. So I am going to, I'm going to read a little bit of a note that they wrote and then we're going to head into their warm up pretty. So this is from Daniel Roerbach. Can we call it the riddle realm?

Yes, you're entering Daniel's riddle realm. That's Daniel's or just. Just repeat. Daniel does not specify. So I'm going to say everybody comes in. I wish I would have used different words there. Nope, do it. I've listened to the show since week one in Heller from the Magic Taverns. It's about mid 2016.

I wanted to say how much I love both podcasts and how I'm consistently good. How I am constantly get stared at because I abruptly start laughing out of the blue while walking around town or in the gym, Bragg. Oh, sweet. Also, you should come to the West Coast to do a live show. We are stupid. So we're doing a show at the Hollywood Improv on Mother's Day.

Yeah, so take that. No, I'll take that. Take that word back. Anyway, here's some hurdles inspired from a video game that I used to play when I was younger called Runescape. Any of you ever played Runescape? I've heard of it.

OK, you don't have to have played or heard the game to get these riddles. Each riddle has five lines that all pertain to one object or thing. There are some hints that I can give you and there's an answer, there's five riddles and there's the three. There is an answer? Oh, thank God. Daniel included the answer. Let's Daniel, they do this.

Okay, cool. I don't know if you need to write something of this down, but let's just imagine that you don't. Okay. My first is in the well, but not at sea. W. My second in I, but not in me. Why? My third in flies, but insects not found.

Why? My last is in earth, but not in the ground. Why? My last is in earth, but not in the ground. Welcome to earth. My whole, when stolen, causes death to thee. Is this a letter thing? Is it a letter thing? Well, I would, I'd be safe to say that it's a letter thing.

Yeah. So my first is in well. My first is in well, but not at sea. So, but not at sea. So why would, if it's like W, if it's the first letter't well, but not at C. So, but not at C. So why would it, if it's like W, if it's the first letter of well, which is W, why would it say and not at C? Cause one of them was like,

my third is in flies, but no, in sex about or something. Which means it spelled F, like it, right? But I guess both ways it spelled. I think you're getting hints to the first, second, third, and fourth letter here. So my first is in the well, but not at C, hint. My second in I, but not in me. Okay, all right, start over then.

Okay. I gotta write this down, we were wrong. Well, no, you don't have to write, yeah, you just have to write down a letter for each one, catch it. Yeah, that will keep, all right. My first is in the well, but not at C. My second in I, but not in me. I feel like that's the easy one. My third in flies, but insects not found.

My last is in the earth, but not in the ground. Wind, probably wind. Flies, my third in flies. My third is in flies. There's no N's no in W I N flies the way I, okay, so it's either L or W. Yeah. I see. Okay, and then the second word is... The second word.

The second letter is... My second eye, but not in me. So why? I, E. Just letter I. So it's L, E, maybe, or W. No, my second in the letter I.. Just-just a letter i. Uh. So it's L-E maybe or W-E? No, my second in the letter i. Oh, it's the letter i.

Oh, it's the letter i, I don't know that. My bad, my bad, yes. The letter i, but not in me. Gotcha. My third in flies, but insects not found. F. Life. Life.

Yes. Fucking life. My whole winstolen causes death to the- My favorite serial slash board game No one's favorite Any Murphy movie The golden child, okay You know that on DVD you now that you get how to play these I think that they'll go a little easier

I'm Aaron now that you get how to play these you'll realize they're not gonna be fun Thank you for the napkin with the pen. Thank you for the napkin with the pen. You're asking a waitress for a phone number What the fuck is this? Okay, is everybody ready? Yep. Yarp. My first is in wizard, but not in mage Z my second in jail, but not in a cage my dad You're dead in a cage My third is in plant, but not in a sage My last is in drawing, but not in a sage. My last is in drawing, but not on a page. My hole comes swift.

My hole comes swift. Come on. My hole comes in swiftly when the soaring seas rage. I dropped out of this one. I'm saying that again. My hole comes in swiftly when the soaring seas rage. Is that the last letter or is that a hint to the puzzle? That's the hint to the puzzle.

So whole WHOLE. Like the whole word comes in with. It is not wave. Right, so wizard. Wizard but not mage. M-A-G-E. M-A-G-E. Jail but not cage.

Plant but not sage. Drawing but not page. This might take me a second, I'm sorry. Okay, don't apologize to me. It is wind. Yeah, baby. Forget it. I'll never forget it. I got answer and all I did was just think of what I said for the last one. Let's call the whole thing off. So these are all four letter words that should help you a little bit too. Love it. Okay, ready?

My first is in fish, but not in the sea. My second in birds, but not in a tree. My third is in doors, but not in a hall. My last is everything, but nothing at all. Wait, so fish, birds, doors. Fart? Fart. But not in a hall.

Everything, but not in at all. But nothing at all. It's in fish, but not. So does this, is this a three letter word? It's four. Fish, but not sea, birds, but not tree, doors, but not hall, everything, but nothing at all. It's in fish, but not- So does this, is this a three letter word? It's four. Fish, but not sea, birds, but not tree, doors, but not hall, be- Everything, but nothing at all.

E, Fubide? It's a, the middle one is not B. It's not FB, that's no word. You ready for a last one? Maybe you never heard of fucking Facebook? I cannot- Zuck! You got zucked!

I cannot die as long as I have food Anything everything yes nothing can die as long as as food It is fire damn girl damn Aaron you're on roll Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, also in lizard. L. My third in-night, but not in-day. How's the night's felt? In-i-g-h-d. My last is in the fields, but not in the hay. My whole is the most powerful tool you will possess. In the fields, but not in the hay. I don't think there's any crossover letters.

So why the fuck would they do fields in hay when there's no redundancies? It's a rhyme. Night and day fields in hay. Is it M, Ginge of the N, I, Nice.

Yes, my whole is the most powerful to all of you will possess. Mine. Come to be my mice. If you use it, my mice, remember what is it? My five letters, I guess. Yeah, it's a pickle pepper. The guy who, the pipe, the pipe.

The pipe, pipe. Mine. You're so clever. Mine, mine. Mine, am I in? E. No. M-I. In.

Mine. Mind. Mind. A mind. I'm gonna throw something at you in three. Two. She just threw up on you. She's turned her word. Wow.

We're leaning up. I love Aaron's catchphrase when she throws up on you. Clean it up. Clean it up. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, this is the last one. That's also what Aaron says whenever she makes out with someone. Clean it up. Wait, hold on. is the last one. That's also what Aaron says when whenever she makes out with someone

Wait hold on They're like making out so good. You just got risotto over their face. Yeah Got squash risotto all over them clean it up as whole I've ever tried to kiss someone in total silence. We make those sounds, but we don't need to. That's true. We want others, it's the idea to make others notice us, or to be like, look what I'm doing. I'm a man.

Kissing is one of the horneous things I do. I think Aaron's new catchphrase should be clean it up, asshole. I think anytime, anytime something good happens, I think where we're gonna replace Bingo Bang O'Hata be clean it up, asshole. I think anytime, anytime something good happens, I think where we're gonna replace Bingo Bangalhatata with clean it up, asshole. Like someone scores a point. Yeah, clean it up, asshole.

Clean it up, asshole. Daniel paid his money, he wants to get this thing read. I mean, we don't sell this airtime to people. So let's be respectful and let's finish his riddles. Okay. Oh, because we haven't given him enough with his 18 fucking riddles. It says right here, he has not had enough yet.

He goes to the gym, so he deserves the ass. First is in tar, but not in a swamp, my second in fire, but not in a comp. Woof, careful. C-A-M-B. Okay. He just didn't, I think Daniel thinks swamp and camp rhyme. Oh, let's move right along. My third is in eagle, but never in air.

My last is in hate, but also in care. Teggy, my whole, Tegger's four letters. My whole where's more rings the older I get. Tree. Tree. Yes, I did to give it that last hit, but you got it and you didn't have to know the other ones.

Okay. Hooray. Very last one. My first is in water, but also in tea, my second in fish, but not in the sea. My third is in mountains, but not underground. My last is in strike, but not like in pound. Time.

My home may fleet as fun goes around. Probably time. It's time. Bubba time. I didn't even have a chance to get it. I'm in, try it, most of these, and I just guess the fucking world. Oh, yeah.

You guessed that one before the hit to the ward. Thank you, Daniel. I know that it may seem like what we've done here is just criticize you and call you an asshole. But we actually like you and we like the riddle that you submitted. I didn't even know and I would be close. Yeah, clean it up, asshole.

And you know what? It sounds like you had a fun childhood of playing that game. So here's to you, Daniel, a true person that got their riddle red on the show. Yeah. Clean it up, asshole. Clean it up, asshole.

I will say we are very much running out of riddles. So if you can write your own or send us some that we may not have access to, please email those to us and we will definitely get them on the show if we haven't read them before. What I like about people who make up their own riddles is there's no chance that they've appeared on the show before. A lot of people send us the same riddle over and over again.

Because they're locked in their parents' attic and we've done a chain tour. Some people also are like, hey, I'm listening. I made it to episode eight and I wanted to send you guys a riddle and I'm like, oh God, keep listening. We've probably already done that one. Okay, I know that you guys are gonna be excited about this as old man Puzzies today.

I have brought back one of our favorite guests on the show. No, please welcome. Mother fuck Nathan Levin. No! No! No! No! No! No, please welcome mother fuck Nathan Levin All happening I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can't, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can't, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I let's start off with one of, I mean, we're on, like I said, this is Nathan Levi's Stories with the Holes of Volume 2. Also, Adolf, someone, a fan gave you these books, right?

We've shouted them out before. I don't think they're a fan. Not that I've heard the riddles, I don't think they're a fan. But something written in pain at the top of this book that I just noticed today is it just says, Rosebud. It's just Alice Lane. Okay, this one is.

Oh, look, girl, who threw that cup in a trash. It's a perfect anagram for Lord Voldemort. Okay, this one's called Sheryl's Peace of Cardboard. Oh, even the titles are boring. I think I got it. Sheryl used the piece of cardboard. All right, hold on, this one is called Suzy's piece of cardboard. It doesn't make it better. Suzy used the piece of cardboard to get into a large rectangular box.

Now in the box, Suzy observes the results of an activated machine, which gives her great pleasure. When the machine is no longer operating, Susie throws her remaining cardboard away and leaves the box. Now, if you remember the way that these are played, is you can ask me yes or no questions to help you land on the truth. These are stories.

Susie and Sain. Can I read it again? Yes. Susie and Sain, no. Oh, you do want me to read it again. Susie used the piece of cardboard to get into a large rectangular box. Now in the box, Susie observes the results

of an activated machine, which gives her great pleasure. When the machine is no longer operating, Susie throws her remaining cardboard away and leaves the box. Again, I will tell you. Is it a photo booth? It is not a photo booth. This book was published in the year 1990.

Oh, Time Machine. Yes, it's a Time Machine. A shitty Time Machine. No, it's not a Time Machine. And again. Is it a phone booth? No, it's not a phone booth. It's just a piece of cardboard.

The way to ask me yesterday questions is not just to guess it. Well, what if I get the answer? Well, you tell me, it's just a no for right. Let's show. Is this podcast where comedy comes to die? Where comedy comes to die? Hey, Riddle, Riddle. That's actually pretty good.

Let's see. What comedy comes to die? Is it a vibrator? Yes, it's a vibrator. This is a book for kids. And she plunges a vibrator deep within her body and plunges the wrong word of use. Okay, okay, okay. No, it'ses a vibrator deep within her body Yeah, okay, okay, okay, okay, no it's not a vibrator. Is it so she goes into a box? Into a large rectangular box. Oh the boxes are vagina

The boxes are vagina No, it's not a coffin. Fludge it into her a rectangular box. Yeah, I think about a piece of cardboard It in 1990 were like driver's license cardboard. Like what's credit cards aren't cardboard? No. Like what piece of cardboard operates a machine or would give you access to a machine? Yeah, that's a great place to think about. Yeah, that's where we should start is what gives you access to a machine.

When have I ever held cardboard and been like, ooh, access. You're going to hate this? Oh, no. When I'm eating access cereal. Access cereal, ooh, access. You're gonna hate this? Oh, no. When I'm eating access cereal. Access cereal. Serial. JPC, this box of cereal says eating ass. Okay.

Eating to asses. Does the box have like electricity in it? Aaron, do you not want to participate in our eating ass then? Yeah. We were, we were doing it. We were so gentle. We were doing a cereal commercial for eating ass.

We're doing a cereal commercial. We're doing a little cereal commercial for eating ass. You didn't want to play. Let's see it, gently. We're doing a cereal commercial for eating us. We're gonna do a little cereal commercial for eating us. You didn't want to play with it. Let's see it quick. Here we go. Let's see it quick commercial for eating us. All three of us have to be 100% committed. Okay.

We'll see. Okay. Hey son, hey daughter. Oh God. You kids won some breakfast. Put down. It's almost noon. Yeah, and you never let us eat any sugary cereals that we enjoy!

Yeah, I've kept you home from school and made you sit at the table for a few hours, so that I can serve you this! As? What's that? That's right! As is... well, it's... self-described. It's a butt! It's a human butt! But, you can't eat that, Dad! Mmm, as you can! eat that, Dad. Ask you can. And I'm here too. You don't seem enthused.

I am. This is just my face and my voice. Okay, you better commit or else we'll have to do this over. Oh no. And we're all getting paid for this commercial. Yes. All right. Don't lose your acetite.

Don't lose your acetite. Don't lose your acetite. So the box has electricity. Yes. The box has electricity in it. Is it a car? No. JPC is a regular. Right, I'm gonna mad at this.

So is it like a kid playing pretend and like a, no, he's kitchen box? It's like not that Duryo's commercial. Billy, you're so old. A shower. No, bigger. Bigger, double shower. Double shower. old. A shower. No, bigger. Bigger, double shower. Double shower.

No. Double shower. It's not a double shower. That's a really good guess, Annel. That's a really good guess. Because that's a real thing. Oh my god, it's a double shower, cool. I don't know.

I don't know. You know what I really want? It's one of those shower heads that feels like rain. But that's expensive. Oh, you mean the sky? Oh, good. It's gracious. I got to tell you this story. So my roommate wanted to buy that one. And he's like, it's expensive. Oh, you mean the sky? Oh, good. It's gracious. I gotta tell you this story.

What? So my roommate wanted to buy that one, and he's like, it's great. I did all the research. It's from Australia. He bought it on Amazon. It's not from Australia. It's manufactured in China,

buy an Australian company, and it's awful. Oh, no. Two lines? Yeah. Two lines, if you're listening, you got put on blire. Oh, I've told it this. I'm like, this thing sucks, but it was only $20.

So if you're looking at something that sucks for $20, easy to install. I feel like that's not enough pressure, right? Wouldn't one rain falls? That's not like enough pressure to get clean. I've stayed in some of that. You better get clean, you better get clean. I've stayed in some hotels that have those

and it is high pressure. It's like, yeah, it's. It's pretty luxurious. It's luxurious, yeah. I don't understand. I can't differentiate mentally between a shower head and like hard rain. Like what is the difference? If it's hard, if there's enough pressure behind it, that it's a full on shower, what is the difference between a shower head already and this one that produces a rain like effect?

It's the way that the water forms into droplets that is different from a normal shower head. But the way water forms into droplets is a slower, pace, less pressure, right? I don't necessarily think so. It's not like it's drops of water falling on you, but you understand what rain is, right? Why am I fucking explaining this to a guy

who's never taken a shower in his fucking life? This one was a really good energy. You know what I'm saying? A shower? I have a spray for breeze on my neck. It's called an adult shower. Can you give us a hint? Yes, it's bigger than a bath.

A shower, I should say. It's bigger than a shower. So it's the piece of cardboard. Here's a question. Is a piece of cardboard is it unique to each person? Yes. So it's got to be some sort of ID or payment. Is it a type of payment? Not a type of payment. No. Is it a type of ID? No. Is it a type of you would pay for this type of cardboard? So it's unique to each person. Oh, it's a baseball card. No. Also, I got I just think that the word cardboard is still in you off because I

don't think it necessarily has to be cardboard. I don't know. If you could get that piece of cardboard or what the rectangular box was, you'd understand. Speaking of serial, the only cardboard that I've ever touched has been like cutting out the back of a serial box for like the UPC or something you trade in or something.

To put it on the letter and ransom somebody. I don't know. I'm thinking I'm ready for the answer. Okay, well, you don't get it. Can you give us a hint? Yeah, I've given you multiple hints and- Well, then tell us who you are. Give us a better hint and no one wanted to guess anything.

I guess so many things. So yeah, so it's yes or no questions that you can ask to understand what this large rectangular box was or what this piece of card was. I think I know what the large rectangular box is. What is it? Nathan Levi's fucking casket when I bury this bitch. Aaron already said it was a coffin, and it's not.

Okay, so it is a, does the box, is it like for grownups or for kids? Can be for both. Does it provide entertainment? Yes. Does it provide entertainment in a public space? both. Does it provide entertainment? Yes. Does it provide entertainment in a public space? Yes.

Does it provide entertainment out of mall? Yes. Could be. Is it an arcade machine? It's not an arcade machine. Is it a roller coaster? To get into the large rectangular box. Is it a bouncy house?

Susie goes into large rectangular box. It's not a game, it's not a bouncy house. It's like a mall. Oh, it's a dressing room. It's not a dress bigger.'s not a fancy house. It's like a mom. Oh, it's a dressing room. It's not a dress bigger. If you could get the size of this thing that you might have. Can hundreds of people fit in this box?

Yes. Can thousands? So it's a store. Is it a store? No. Is it a movie thing? Yes. Oh, the ticket for a movie thing?

Yes. Oh. But what movie theater's putting on fucking cardboard? Except for in fucking She uses the ticket to enter a movie theater she threw her stubbleway when the movie ended. Oh.

No, no, no, no, no. Even in 1990, it's hard to imagine that movie tickets were made out of cardboard? I want to see a scene. It can't be. JPC, you're going to a Kira Sody's theater. Kira Sody's. Do they still have Kira Sody's?

That's still a theater, right? Aaron, you're playing Karen Sody's, who's the granddaughter of the owner, and you are giving a ticket. And when you give JPC the ticket, it's printed on an unusual medium. What are you here to see? A one for Firefly.

Firefly? Yes please. Okay. Alright. Sorry. I got a toast to get on some bread. You have, I'm sorry. I will.

I will have a toaster that is specialty for each movie and you toast it and then I hand to the bread and then you hand the bread to the ticket ticket. You get to see a movie. I'm sorry. Uh, okay. I my ticket is bread. Yep, and if you want to you can eat it Okay, but I give it to the ticket ticket. Does he like rip half of the piece of bread? Okay, can I see your ticket please? Yeah, it's just this piece of toasted bread. I know what a fucking ticket is I asked you for it. Oh, okay. Yeah, just can I see your ticket please? Yes, yes here. Here you are sir Nope, oh well, not so fast. I got to finish taking your ticket. You don't rip it You're gonna eat it. Sorry. I'm taking your ticket sir. Is there a problem? You're eating yeah, I'm just you're eating toast to dry

I need you to go back to the box office. What? You go back to the box. Why give me my ticket. to go back to the box office. Why? Because they're going to write you up. I'm going to get written up. You're going to get written up. May I? I was sent back to the box office. Were you complaining about a man eating dry toast in front of you?

I don't necessarily know that I was complaining about it. I definitely was pointing it out. Yeah, you don't do that. That's really rude. OK. It's super messed up. Let people enjoy their carbs. How they want to enjoy their carbs.

Can I just get another ticket please? Um, to Firefly? Yeah. Yeah. It's the, well I said. Oh my voice changed. I forgot. I said, Karen, come on talk to you for a second. Yes, sorry. Yeah, hi.

Karen, um, when customers come to a care sody, as they expect they certain, I don't know, certain affectation, like an old time, it's like an old timey, like an old-timey cigarette girl. Yeah. Almost like a Betty Boop. Yeah, I got thrown off. I'll try again.

Yeah, just so you know, I'm meant serenity, which is the Firefly movie, but the movie is called Serenity. Uh, Ray? I'm Ray. Are you a fan of the two show? I got canceled after one season. Oh, no, but I love when people talk about it.

I didn't even get it. How underrated it is. Didn't really get it. It was just it is. Didn't really get it. It was just we, you know, some of his classic early work before he kind of started doing some stuff where dollhouse was also great. Are you analyzing Jusku fan? No.

No. Oh, okay. She was bringing on. She was bringing on for sure. And early just we in is, bye. He knows how to write for women. See. You guys nailed that Nathan Levy story with holes.

And you're so good at them. And this is a big confidence boost for both of you. Okay. Okay. Well, speaking of confidence boost, I need to lay down for a little bit. Just to recover from how terrible this riddle is. So we're going to take a quick break and we'll be right back with a different book of riddles. Hey GPC! Uh, uh, yeah?

You're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm Prinking at all and I'm setting up a website to I just need some advice this podcast is sponsored by Squarespace I'm not I'm not mad at you. We're pranking at all spaces to all at one website platform Entrepreneurs to stand out and to see it online Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a

beautiful website. It gays with your audience. And so, let me think for products that cut into time, all in one place, all on your terms. Hey, Edel, come here. Come here. Come here. Hey, what's what's going on? I actually, I want to prank JPC and I want to set up a whole website to prank him. Do you have anything that like, is there like an online store that could set up on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace, you can have custom merch. You can easily sell custom merch and create passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production, and inventory and shipping are handled for you,

saving you time and money. What is happening? Okay. Wait, what's going on with Addle? Oh, nothing, nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal Squarespace website, not a prank thing, new, and he's gonna tune you. And I'm gonna use analytics, use insights to grow my business,

and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool. I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my Prank website, the Prank's I-Toology. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for?

I can't remember what the website was for. The website was for. Prank. With Squarespace. With Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Dirt Party tools to extend the functionality of your website. Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, Vattle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine.

Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back. She's back. Hey, Aaron. Hey, Aaron. Can we go to grandma's house?

Wait. I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey Adel and JPC, thank you for meeting me in the middle of the woods here. I am sort of at an empaths.

I can't decide whether or not to go this way or this way. I'm having a hard time choosing a path. You know, there never truly is a middle of the woods. Isn't it funny to think about something like that? There never truly is a middle of the woods. No, this is the middle. Okay, this is it. Addle, can you help?

Yeah, actually, so as per Robert Frost, I don't know if you know his poems. He has a poem called Better Help. I believe this is written in the 1800s, but it still stands true today more than ever. Aaron, you should try Better Help. Have you heard of this? You seen this?

Mm-hmm. Because sometimes Aaron in life were faced with tough choices, and the path forward isn't always clear. Whether you're dealing with decisions around career relationships, being stuck in the middle of the woods, therapy helps you stay connected to what you ow, ow, sorry that also does so fast. Therapy helps you stay connected to what you really want while you navigate life and the woods. Mm, and better help is entirely online, so it's designed to be convenient, flexible,

and suited to your schedule. I've been using it for several years, and it suits the way that my brain works, way better than traditional therapy ever did. And when Aaron says traditional therapy, just so everyone's clear, what she means is tricking two of her friends to coming to the middle of the woods,

even though there isn't truly the concept of the middle of the woods, isn't that fun to think about? All you have to do is just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a license therapist, and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. Hey, Aaron, a GPC's putting down bread crumbs and then immediately picking them up and eating them. Dirty bread crumbs. And he's also like really into that owl who's swooping down. Anyways, let there be your map with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash riddle today

to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp. H-E-L-P.com slash riddle. R-I-D-D-L-E. R-I-D-D-L-E, the middle of riddles of D, but there is no true middle of riddle because it would be the space in the LIDAR JPC. I am home.

I am home. Who are we? What is this? I, uh, clink, clink, clink. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. I just want to make a quick toast to, I know it's JPC's birthday, and we're all so excited to talk about him,

but I wanna talk about my favorite, my favorite thing in the world. And that is the app Rocket Bunny. Oh, yeah, Aaron, that's one of my favorite things as well. Mm-hmm. Rocket Bunny is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills all in one place.

I've been using it for years, way before they were a sponsor, and it helps me so much, especially around tax season. Clean, clean, clean, clean, clean, uh, sorry, I also want to give a toast. Rocket money, well quickly and easily find your subscriptions for you. And for any you don't want to pay for anymore, just hit cancel. And Rocket money will cancel it for you. It any you don't want to pay for anymore, just hit cancel and rocket money will cancel it for you. It's that easy.

Clint, Clint, Clint. It also categorizes your expenses so you can easily track your budget in real time and also get alerted if anything looks off. Over three million, oh, Clint, Clint, Clint, over three million people have used rocket money saving the average person up to $720 a year. We love rock. Stop. Stop.

No, click, click, click, stop. Throwing your money away, cancel unwirted subscriptions today and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocket money dot com slash riddle. That's rocket money dot com slash riddle. Rocket money dot com slash riddle and tell them JPC's birthday got ruined by two of his friends for doing speeches about rocket money the website I love you rock and money Clink and We're best friends best friends. We're all best friends here. She's got a cardboard to ride

And we're all best friends here. She's got a cardboard to ride. I'm a favorite Beatles song. That's great. I do like the Beatles. They're a good band. I mean, you know how tickets are synonymous with cardboard. Yeah. Oh, legal.

Ready for another one. Yes. Okay. So this one's called the picnic. The picnic was well attended and very crowded. But no one came to the event. Dance. Stories with ho. Beans go marching one by one. But no one came to the event ants and stories with

The ants go marching one by one One by one The ants go marching one The little ones have to touch The best part about the best part about this is you got it immediately, but you were still wrong Because the answer is well attended by crowds of ants and mosquitoes Who swarmed around the food which was prepared for people expected to attend no one showed up? I like that Nathan Levi this Wormy little dude sitting in his basement is like it's too easy. Let me add in mosquitoes. Let me add in this fucking

Actually in his bio at the end it does say he's a millionaire and he lives in a castle What Nathan if you're listening, please adopt me. I will solve your mysteries You know I have to see a seed. Aaron, you are going to play Bathan Bivai. Oh, Cali-A. So you're alternate universe, Nathan Levi. You live in a castle and you have spent your whole life writing riddles in search of a boy who can sell off your riddles and then you'll adopt them as your son via Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

They'll inherit your whole fortune. Adel, you are Aula Shazam, a boy who has been summoned to the castle to try to prove yourself. Who's at my door in the rain? Hello, sir. My name's Nate. Does my face scare you? Does my face scare you? No, but the volume of your voice does. Come in. Creeeeek. Would you call me? name's Nate I said step over this cream my name's me. Oh, yeah, oh my shoes got wet

Come into my home Peter. Oh I think I think my shoes are ruined Rebok They said feel us but then they got this Have you ever heard of a ritual castle before or rattle? fine castle before. Oh a rassle. Fine. I don't know if you'll cut out for this. I heard you the most mischievous evil boy in town and that's why I summoned you to this castle. Yeah you heard right motherfucker. All right fine. What it takes to write me does it to be sure. I cut it I cut a cat

and I put it in a jar. I throw a match in it. That's just horrible If not a prank at all that's a fun prank. It's a fun ass prank Do you know what it takes to write riddles? Judging Your books just a pen in a paper. Yeah, just a pen in a paper and a picture for humanity You just need to want to hurt people. I was married once and I told her riddles every morning at breakfast and then she walked out the door and she married the first person she saw.

Yeah, I heard about that woman who married that eight-year-old. As my friend, my friend, was gonna take... Take it down a notch. Who's talking about the news? I can still hear her voice in my head right now. Ah, you're pissing on me. I'm kidding. We're good. Give me another riddle.

We're kidding. Do we solve that one? We're good. Yeah, it was answered mosquitoes. Suzie's diet. Suzie could eat lobster, but not shrimp. She ate pears, but not apples. Turnips were allowed, but never spinach, even crab would suffice, but not potatoes, corn,

or even lamb. She can only eat things that are one, so, so lobsters. No. So lobster, but not shrimp. It's a lettering thing. Yes, it's a thank you. Lobster, not shrimp, pears, but not apples. Turnips were a lot, but never spinach. Even crab would suffice, but not potatoes, corn, or even lamb. Oh, this one sucks. She can't eat foods that taste good.

You don't think shrimp tastes good? Is it a letter thing? It is a letter thing. Is it a... There's something unique about all of the words of foods that she can eat. It's like a vowel followed by a silent consonant or something like that. No, it's not that. So you don't have the words of things that she can't eat, please.

All right. Lobster, pairs, turn's not that. Read out the words of things that you can't eat, please. All right, lobster, pairs, turnips, crab. All have r in them. It's not that. It's so fucking hard to get this. Lobster,

pear, crab, and wood. What was it? Lobster, pear, turnip, and crab.

If you're listening to the show right now, which God, why would you be? But if you are listening to the show right now and you're like on Twitter or on Instagram, I want you to tweet at us. If you think you know the answer to this riddle, and I want you to hashtag it, where comedy comes to that? hashtag it, Levi, which is levy.

S holes, Levi's holes. If you know the answer to this riddle. I don't know. And especially now that you said that's impossible. I think it's very difficult to get this. I feel like if I could see it and write it down, I could probably get it. Would it help? Maybe, but maybe not.

Yes, I would say it helps. I guess that's the answer to anything. I would say it would probably help. Lobster. Lobster pairs, turnips, and crab, but not shrimp, apples, spinach, potatoes, corn, lamb. not shrimp, apples, spinach, potatoes, corn, lamb. Not those things.

And all the words. Is it a vowel or consonant? It doesn't have anything to do with vowels or consonants. That's actually a great question. Because it has nothing to do with vowels because it has nothing to do with vowels and it has nothing to do with consonants. Is it have to do with? Is it do with like, what it looks like upside down?

So like, no. No, Frimp has I am, which is I'm, Lamb has I am, which is I'm, corn has OR, which is OR, T-O and potatoes, like is it like, were smaller words contained within? No.

It does have something to do with word order, or letter order. I will say Or was it like the opposite Mm-hmm guys guys, I don't seriously. I need to go to the hospital All right, please take me to hospital. No, no, no, JPCs Seriously, you're idea for a riddle podcast You think that if you were sick, I would take you to the hospital.

I need to see Dr. Fronikamon. All right, Dr. Fronikamon will give you a hint. Think about those words, lobster turnips. We have been. Pairs, crab. Okay. In relation to the alphabet. Oh, they're all letters.

Yes, they're all made of letters. I don't know. All of these words have something in common in relation to the alphabet. I mean... Crab is the easiest one to see it, by the way. Wait, Crab's one she can or can. Oh, so she can.

Crab's... So A, B, so it has consecutive letters in the alphabet. Yes. Yeah. Lobster, ST, turnips, TU, pairs our S-Crab AB. All of the foods that she can eat have consecutive letters at the hospital. I need to go to the hospital.

Why don't you just eat Dr. Funny from an honest guy? Ma'am? Yep. Can I ask why you're here? Do you have an emergency? You're in the ER. Yeah, I'm on a riddle podcast. That can be a thing.

It is. Is it funny? Wait a second. And you would think you would sort of hope it would be an NPR stuff. I'm so be a thing. It is. Is it funny? Wait a second. And you would think you would sort of hope it would be sort of an NPR style. I'm so sorry. You just said that you're on a fiddle podcast?

I'm a huge fan. You JPC? No. No? Oh my god. Are you Adelrify? Oh my god. You're Adelrify.

I love Katta Badger. No. No. Wait. Are you Sandy Weiss? No. No. Are you Sandy-wise? No, no Cindy-wise Are you the riddles? You are one of the guests that they've had on because I wouldn't really see your phone or a microphone Or a riddle podcast

Oh, you know, there's like a lady there and she's pretty loud Would JPC will sometimes play women yeah, I don't stroke his hair. I've heard letters on a patreon episode Is that a letter? No, are you on your you are not already paired people Bapapapapak he is amazing. Are you logo by Emily Cardenas? Cardamus it's Emily Cardamus and Emily Morris. I'm not listening to the show Oh, you had gum no, I'm not head gum head No, but I am I am okay. Well, we need to see some insurance. Oh

You're sharing beef. Yeah everyone's sharing beef Sharon. Yes. Am I everyone's least favorite on Hey Riddle rail sort of feels like maybe I'm the heart Yeah, you're the heart of I mean based on social media addles the least fair No, you definitely the heart of the show all a captain planet where hearts the worst one You got a little monkey it's sort of hard to be on this show because we get a lot of like JPC and Adela are so funny and then Aaron you're there too. So that's sort of what Mike is.

No, that's what they say about Adela. No. JPC. People love me. I don't know what to tell you. I know I see. I see. She's a love man. Oh, JPC.

Oh, brother. Unfortunately, I love the most confident person in the cast. Look, I wish I could help you. I wish I could help, but people do indeed like me. People love JP. People think JP is so funny. People have a huge, dumb old crush on Adel's stupid voice. I feel like everyone is obsessed with Aaron.

I feel like everyone is like every episode people are like, oh my god, I am Aaron. Aaron is mood. Aaron is not. Yeah. Unless you're asleep, Aaron is not mood. Now. But then somebody's like someone after hearing this is going to be like, uh, unless you're asleep, Aaron is not mood. Oh, Aaron's my mood. Aaron is mood. Aaron, that's not true. Aaron is a fabric store from Broadway. Do. Thank you, do, thank you, mood. Thank you, mood. Do Adel and I constantly, I made.

Oh my god, KJ. Thank you, mood. Do Adel and I constantly get unsolicited questions about our UTIs? No. Or get, that all the hats made for us. No. For people, for people. No, but here's the thing.

People, I think, I may be the most approachable. People are like, Aaron's going, like, are, I think, I may be the most approachable, people are like, Aaron's gonna, like, are, people are the least worried that I'm going to dislike them. I think that it like crashes them because it has happened a few times where people are just like, like so excited to meet Adel and like,

Gidey and like have a little crash on them and then some people are like, I'll be like, oh, do you wanna meet JPC? And you're like, I don't know, I think he might hate me. They're like, well, what happens if he hates me? I'll be devastated. What if he hates me? Here's what I think, Aaron, I think you are the most,

I think people find JPC the funniest. I think people love you the most. No. And I feel like by you, I feel like- You're confused people are crash on you, do you? I feel like right now by you saying all this, it's going to double. Oh, you think I'm not manipulating it?

Double people's love me. I know what I'm doing. Here's what I want to pause it. Is that if you listen to the show, tweets, I love the show versus isolating specific people. Just say I love the show and show a little riddle. Yeah. Or if you want to tell someone something, tell that person, but then don't tag the other people. Because I've had people tag me and be like, and Adel's there and I'm like, why did you tag me in this?

I don't need to see this. Here's what I will say. If you like the show, tweet at us. I love JPC and his co-workers. Okay, can we just get to new place? That is how I see it. Okay, this is, you gonna love this because this is from the book, Nathan Levi's story

with holes while he's doing it. No! No! No! There's a volume two! What publisher gave a volume two? I love my guys! There's no way these aren't self-published. And it'll associate think book. Okay, this one's called.

We are stressing KJ. Here, can I, I wanna do something real quick. Can I do something real quick? I'm sure. I wanna see a a scene JPC You're not in the scene good Aaron I want you to play um you're gonna play a brief kit Which is a cat so picture a cat, but it's it's a it's a head and four legs and a tail

But it's bodies a briefcase Okay, so first picture of briefcase and then out of the front of the briefcase is a cat's head Underneath is for a little I got it poking out in the back there's a tail And if you were to open up the briefcase, it's just Oregon. So it's like it is it is the cat She's It's not it's not it's not wearing a briefcase. It is the briefcase. It's called briefcase But opening it is possible Yes

Okay, all right when where am I and then I'm I'm I'm I'm called lap dog and I'm a dog that opens up into a laptop. Okay, all right, when we were at my? And then I'm called lap dog, and I'm a dog that opens up into a laptop. Okay. So we're just two super adorable characters that are new to the show, brief-kitten lap dog that everyone loves. And the people are gonna go fucking not support.

JPC, you're not in this. Okay, KJ, I want you to look at me. Guaranteed, I come in to the scene, I open that cat, and I open that dog. Okay. All right, let's get started. Okay, and this open that cat and I open that dog All right And this is what this is for Aaron and I to to to make up some ground with the audience terms of like Hey brief kit guess what happened to me today

Someone opened you saw your guts no a man picked me up it took me all the way down to the loop downtown. Nice a date? No, it was off. I see that I was his briefcase and I rode the train and I went all the way downtown. Oh, this is a sad story. Where's you two today? I'm mostly recharged. Got some software updates? Oh, not like a bath. No, I-the electrocute myself. Oh yeah. Yeah. I don't want to be opened up today. Yeah, are you depressed? No, I'm just just my voice.

Just- Oh. Oh, here's this man. I never noticed before. Oh, look, there's a man. Oh, here comes a man. Oh, he's skateboarding in with a backwards hat and he's dabbing. And his shirt says 420.

Well, he has no interest in briefcase. Everyone's cheering him on. Yeah, not a business. Everyone's going, fucking nuts for this guy. I'm insane, and you're my puppet. I've got dimples, fucker, get your milk, me. He said his catchphrases. All right, let's do another riddle.

Love a my catchphrase is something from the fuckers. Hey, I love you guys. I love you too. Aaron, do you have something you want to say to me? Aaron, do you have something you want to say? I'm really enjoying my citrus blend, Italian sparkling mineral wine. All right, Aaron. And my best friend too, I love.

Wait, now you want to do it in a shitty way. Now she wants to do the Eaton-Ask commercial. Let's do drink it, yes. Okay. Nathan's story drink an ass. Okay. All right. Nathan's story is stories with ass. This is called the train accident. Of the 85 people involved in the train accident,

all people survived with no major injuries. Then it's not really an accident. There were two dead on the police list. Solve. The train was transporting two dead bodies. No, could you could have it? No, but that's great. That's a really fun answer.

There's two dead on the... What was it called the police list? Can you read that again? There were two dead on the police list. No, the whole thing. Oh. Sorry. Yes.

Of the 85 people involved in the train accident, all people survived with no major injuries. There were two dead on the police list. I know it. Yeah, it's Phyllis and Clyde dead. It's not Phyllis. Their last name is dead, so there are. It's not Phyllis and Clyde dead.

Can I see a seat? I'm so sorry. You two are Phyllis and Clyde dead. And you're at a party and you were the freaking life of the goddamn party. Oh man, enough. Is this place dead in here or what? It's reading the worst, you're the worst,'re the worst you're the best you're the best.

Um, oh God, I love being a dead. I love having a drop dead gorgeous wife. Stop it. You're killing me. Ah, I'm feeling it. Mom, Dad, can I come down to the party for a little bit? I can't sleep. Cadavra? Go for your room.

David? David? Cadavra? Cadavra, go to your room. Kadaver, go to your room. David, go to your room. Kadaver, go to your room. Why did you call me Kadaver, Dad? What? Because we're the life of the party. We're the life of the party. I love kids.

Sometimes the dead can be lively. I'm getting really teased. It's cool. What do you mean? Come back, come back. Come back. What are people saying? It's what are the kids saying.

She's so pale. What a cruel name for her. Your last name doesn't change the name. No, I'm just saying. Your complexion is just, you have to live with that. Uh, she's so dead they said it twice. Kadever? Pretty good.

Kadever? Kadever, who we call David and you're as a woman? Look at your father and I. There's one more guy over there. Look at Cameron. Look at Cameron and Phyllis dead. We make the most of our last name. We're dead and loving it.

Yeah, you got to have normal first name. My first name is Kadaver dead. Well, to be fair, Cameron's first name was Clyde and then he legally changed it because he didn't like what else. There's a lot going on. See? Mr and Mrs. Allen dead, we're traveling on the train.

I'll got it. Is that right? Oh my God. Oh, well, at least you're learning how to play the game. Honestly, Levi, I respect. No, you don't respect me. If I get it, I respect you. Honestly, Levi, I take back everything in bad.

I said about you. And you're the king. Honestly, I fucking the clown. All right, this is called the one-handed man. And Aaron just, it's perfect. All right, the one-handed man. The one-handed man avoided problems, except

makes sense. When he had two hands. What the fuck? He's always drinking off. Sorry, oh man. Yeah. Okay, say that again. The one-handed man avoided problems,

except when he had two hands The one-handed man avoided problems Except when he had two hands is like the hand of the king like hands like helpers No, but that's a good guess is it not that it's close. It's just a good guess. Thank you two hands He avoided problems except for when he had two hands. I'm clearly in game of problems. One of the hands, again, the hand of the can. The one-handed man avoided problems except when he had two hands. Is it Margaret Atwood's hand, the hand made still?

It's not a hand made still and it's not Margaret Atwood's. This Margaret Atme. Margaret Donut at me would, the one-handed man avoided problems except when he had two hands. So when he had two hands he had a lot of problems. Oh, okay, that reforms it for me. Yep, sure. I see what you're saying. Okay.

Clock. It's not a clock. Let me have a little problem. Two hands, when he clapped. No. I will give you a hint. Is that something that you would be interested in? I love a hint, thank you.

This man is an addict. He's an addict, so he lives above a second story of a house. Above a doctor. He's right on top of a doctor. He's cute. Nice. We did it. We did it.

Is it like he needs to tie off his arm to inject a needle? No, not that type of addict, but good gaps. Addict. Addict. Oh, he's a porn addict. He's a... He's a decent porn. Is he a porn addict?

No. Is he an alcoholic? No. Is he... He's smoking. No. Is what he's addicted to is it considered like universally bad? Uh, no.

No. No. I mean, no. No. I mean, caffeine? No. It is something that people get help with. But it's not considered necessarily bad. I mean, yes. Like marijuana?

Yes, it's bad. Marijuana? No. No. So being in a college band? I'm a here for college band addict anonymous. You stopped rubbing. It's tough drumming. It's no, and he's, he is one handed, so it could be the deaf leopard.

Yeah. I don't know. Can we get a better hint? Oh, what else can you be addicted to? You mean, oh Robert Palmer, addicted to love. No, that was pointed. Night sound. No.

But Jenna Hound. Sex, sleep, food. And the fact that he has two hands. Yeah, if you got the thing that he was addicted to you would get this immediately You okay, what do you need two hands for everything? So it's not drugs. It's not drugs. No, no Is it like a substance? No, not a substance? Bongo's not a massage is not a massage Good massage is not a massage. Good massage is an addiction that you need your hands for. You need two hands for.

No, oh, a CPR. No, TV. You don't need your hands for. This is for the bad riddle. You don't need, you don't need two of your hands. No, you don't need hands for. High-fiving. No, he's addicted to high-fiving.

No, you don't need it. You would definitely need your hands to high-five. I don't know. Is hands in this in this sense? Give me a high-five, man. No, dude. I'm not gonna enable it. Is hands in this instance an actual human hand? No. No. For both? For one, he is a one-handed man. Hunting. So hand, what else has a hand? Clocks. He's a one-handed man who sometimes has two hands. What has hands? Clocks? Muppets.

Yes. Animals? That's not correct. Hands. Some of you can be addicted to. Hands. Don't know. Or moustaches.

Oh, I'm a gambling. Yes. Hands. Two hands. Yeah. I'm so sorry, everybody. I should have gotten that. He was a gamb cards. I'm so sorry, everybody. I should have gotten that. He was a gambler who I do avoid playing cards.

When he had a card hand, he could not quit playing and he got further into debt. Therefore, having many problems. I want to see a scene. JPC, you're a man addicted to cards. Okay. Just not even gambling. Sure.

Like playing cards. Okay. And Aaron, you are someone that he meets who has no idea that this is a problem, and at some point you take out a deck of cards. Cool. Hey. Oh, hey, thanks so much for joining me. I have no problem. Yeah.

God, I guess it's been like 10 years. Yeah, weird. Since high school. Wow. Well, you look like you've aged backwards. Give me your Benjamin Button, doctor. Yeah, weird. Since high school. Wow. Well, you look like you've aged backwards. Give me your Benjamin Button, doctor. Yeah, it's funny. Sorry, are you willing to call the police over here?

Are we okay? I'm sorry, yeah. Sorry, just heard some yelling. Here's your bread sticks and those are never ending. Oh, excellent. Oh, okay. I mean, I do want to see a magic trick. I'm going to wait for our food.

Oh, yeah, what kind of magic are you going behind the ear or like making something disappear? No take out my deck of cards. Sorry I need to call the comp is there a pump? No I'm I'm on someone's order maybe. Yeah I heard someone coming. No you heard someone all but coming. Do you people here usually hear orgasms when people eat the breadstick? When you hear you're coming. Can you put the cake? Take those off the table. Are you okay?

Yeah, it's fine. You'll have this trick. This will make you feel better. Hi, hi, hi, hi. Excuse me. Yes, sorry, yes. I'm so sorry. Can you write a order?

I am ready to order. I'll have the spaghetti. I'm so sorry. Can you write a order? I am ready to order I'll have the spaghetti alamete balls. Can you please take the car? I want lasagna. We don't have a dish called spaghetti alamete balls. Why not? You take it off the menu. No, you're right. What can I get you man? Alright, so here I don't want to pick a card Okay, okay, all right, so here I don't want to see this card Oh my god, he's back on the menu boys I come like that orc from Lord of the Rings

Right before he eats a goblin. All right, you ready for this? It's a goblin. It's a goblin. It's a goblin. The last one is called the career. Kevin spent his entire career with huge wild animals whose claws and teeth. And this is Kevin's face? Or horribly sharp.

But once he was bitten or not once was he bitten or clawed by any of the untamed jungle animals. Why? He spent his whole life around, what was it? Huge wild animals whose claws and teeth were horribly sharp, but not once was he bitten or clawed by any of the untamed jungle animals why. We're just at the Museum of Natural History.

Cove it surrounded by taxidermy, old, tiny animals. Kering time, tattoo for a second. You're working at a Carousadis, not promoting the local museum.y, old-time animals. What's up? You're working at a CariSaudi's, not promoting the local music. Oh, I'm so sorry. Just so you know, it's all the same people from Firefly the show. It's just in a movie. So Nathan Philly is in this? Philly is in it.

Yes, Alan Tudyk. Remember Dr. Horrible? Sorry. Aaron. Aaron, you got it. You nailed it. You put the nail right on the big... He deals with dead animals. Yeah, he's a taxidermist.

Kevin is a taxidermist and that is why... He's on the taxidermist. Oh, Addle, you want to sing your big song? Good! Because it's a show about people who sing their big songs. It's a show about riddles! That'd be a less than all of you. We're getting songs. It's a show about riddles. That'd be a less adult of you. We're getting lecture.

Sorry, Dad. You guys have solved half of Nathan Levi's stories with Holes Volume 2. You should be very, very proud of yourselves. How many more do we have? He has written 20 volumes of this. Here's what I'll say. And we have Patreon money, and I think

that it should be spent buying these. Here's what I'll say. The minute. Everyone glared at me. I just threw a dart be spent buying these. Here's what I'll say. Is it minted? Everyone glares at me. I just threw a dart into Jamie's chest. Is it minted? The minute we finish Nathan Lee Vise Riddles, we are going to do a documentary

where we film ourselves going to meet him. Yeah, that's what we'll use Patreon money for. It's to film a documentary. Higher a documentary crew, to take us out to, I think he's on the East Coast area. And so I think he's like I'll never go home. Boston to Jason. I'm gonna go to jail because it's just gonna be video footage of me kicking the shit I'm sure he's so nice. You're gonna go to jail forgetting your ass came by an old man

That's of course. Oh, yeah, I'm sure he's a nice guy. He just did a terrible thing to the world Nathan again, I know we just dismantled you verbally. You open invite to come on the show. I would love that. Honestly, I would love that. I would love that. And here's what I promise. I will do no work to make that happen. Fans, if you're listening, or fan, I should say,

fan, if you're listening, get that Nathan Levi, bring him to the studio. We gotta get him on the show. And we're not responsible for any jail time you may face. Yes, we calling for you to do that are not responsible because of I think there's a law about it. Aaron, is there anything that you would like to plug? Follow me at Aaron, keep 10 on Instagram.

I talk about my shows there and also if you want to message me or talk to me, that's definitely the way better place and better than Twitter because I don't really go on Twitter. It stresses me out. You can follow me on Twitter and Instagram at out of our five. Come see World News tonight, which is a show that three of us do. We've had, I think the last like 20 shows we've had, Hey, Riddle fans after every single show. So keep, keep coming and keep saying hi afterwards because otherwise we'll leave and go home without saying hi. I want to say hi.

So please grab us and say hello, yell at us and we'll come over and say hello to you. Also, oh, good. No, I just forgot to plug something. No, come back, come back around to me. Okay, Aaron, you can interrupt me now. I'll, I'll see my time to you. No, no, no, no, best friends called web boss at I a theater and if you message me on Instagram I'll give you two free tickets wow

Every single week Two week just turns a 10 I didn't want to not see it again Check out hello from the magic tavern check out sibling specular I'm gonna see it again. I'm gonna see it again. Check out Hello from the Magic Tavern, check out sibling specular. Come see Hello from the Magic Tavern at GenCon, August, second Friday,

we have tickets at the theaters, so come check that out. And then you, if you are a fan of the show, come see it live. We're gonna be in LA on Mother's Day. We are going to be in... LA Mother. And Chicago on Father's Day,

you can get tickets to our live shows at headcom.com slash live. You can follow me, JPC, on Instagram, at Shark Barkman, on Twitter, at JP SoFly. I got all the rest of my crap. Oh, that's something. I forgot to plug something. Aaron, you can plug one more thing. Addle, you can go plug. Addle, as a thing that is Patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle.

Oh, that's a month for bonus content. They said that that was porn. A month where the bonus content. What, they said that that was porn. A month where the bonus content. What? They said that that was porn, and they took that down. Newt pictures of me. And it's fucking a sea turtle is porn.

Another piss. Yeah, I know for this. Let's all go back to our homes on the planet. I'm Jupiter. Good bye. Life forever. This has been the Hay Rolls-Riddle. Creates by Adolf Refi.

Sorry, Eric G. forever by M.O.B.T.R.Gamers and M.O.N.T.A.P. We're gonna win the right two before hate risk will break down. B.A.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R.G.T.R