Hey Riddle Riddle - #431: Daddy's $20 Little Habit

Episode Date: October 21, 2026

Check out Sandy's delightful daily game raddle.quest!Starring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifGuest Starring:Sandor WeiszEditing by: Casey ToneyTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!JPC's Guided Meditations Volume 1, available now at our Patreon digital store!Want merch? Visit our Dashery Store!Want to mail us something? Hey Riddle Riddle 6351 W Montrose Ave #267Chicago, IL, 60634Want to leave us a voicemail? Call (805) RIDDLE-1 or (805-743-3531)Want to advertise on the show? Check out Hey Riddle Riddle via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. Um, GBC, Aaron, come on in, come on in. This is exciting. Big news, big news, big news, big news. Okay. I love big news. You know how we do that podcast together? Hey, Roed reto.

Yes, I was on the tip of my tongue. I thought, this is maybe something that like, I don't know if like fan clubs. Chicago Improft. Sorry, I couldn't remember how I knew you guys. I was like, are these my doctors? Are these my doctors? We've played your doctors. Right. Improv. Hey, Ritter Riddell. Okay, on the same page. Codda. Codda.

I feel like this used to be a big fad maybe with like, you know, like the Beatles fan club or like with the Brady Bunch or whatever. I thought we as a collective as Hey Ritter Riddell, the podcast, we should get a pet. So I got us a fun little pet. And we can name it like Riddles or I guess Riddles is like the only good name. Like the good, the best name. Hey. And Aaron, here's the thing. It is a racehorse. Okay. Now it's going to be like a class pet.

Because is it like the type of thing that like when we're here, it's kind of all of our responsibilities. And then we all have to take turns taking it on weekends and holidays. Oh shit. I didn't even think about the upkeep. So it's a riddle. If it's a racehorse shouldn't have like, um, do, don't race horses have like, like, longer names like, you know, Daddy's $20 little habit or something like that?

Daddy's $20 little habit. That's $20 little habit. He found something that costs $20 these days. Are you buying those state-sponsored Starbucks cups or whatever? Yeah, maybe they're buying. Maybe it's like a baseball card. The state sponsor is the wrong word. Like state sponsors.

The state series is what I like to say. What about a race horse called Hay Riddle-Rid O'Riddle? That's a longer name. That's a good, yeah. Hey, Riddell is coming on the track. Passing the other ones? Okay. Oh, the horse has seemingly given up on the race.

He's smoking a cigarette. He's flicked the cigarette butt into a crowd. He's getting hostile towards the crowd. That sounds good to me. The horse is calling for a scene. He wants to see two of the other horses playing doctors in the moonlight. Adel, this is great. Did you already purchase the horse?

I did. It's actually behind this screen. Oh, not the oxygen-proof screen. Don't tell me. Oh, no. Not the air sealed. Horses breathe oxygen? Uh-oh.

I thought they were like a different kind of creature. Well, that's a good point because their sea horses don't, Aaron, so like half of the horses don't breathe oxygen. That's a good point. Oh, I'm sorry, I got a sea race horse. No, I'm sorry, I got a racist. Sea words horse. Doctors in the Moonlight is a great name for. I got, I got, what Adel got is a racist, cunt, horse.

You said those words. Aaron. You said those words. Aaron, will you please, please help us raise racist, cunt, the horse, also known as The Horse. Doctors in the Moonlight, Turning the Ben. Adel, this is a great, this is a great gift. I will say it was maybe a little bit parallel thinking.

I also got us, ordered us an animal kind of to be like our shared podcast pet. Yeah. I'm glad that Adels horse thing worked out well because mine did not. I wasn't even going to bring it up. I tried to order us a pheasant. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Okay.

Is it alive? No. It came dead. Yeah. And I kind of fast. thumbed it a little bit. I ordered us what I thought was going to be a pheasant. I got a peasant. So this was a... Oh, no. So this peasant's dead. Oh, it's a dead peasant. For sure. This is a medieval peasant. This is like a 13th, 14th century, you know, farm worker. They worked the commons, the shared land. Yeah.

Okay, so long dead. A long dead. A long dead. He'd have a wilder. This was a fresh one. Okay. I got this one from history. Is he plucked? Is he de feathered? He was tired and feathered because apparently this one had done some bad stuff in town. And they kind of run him out. It was kind of a racist, a little bit of a... But parallel thinking. That's crazy, huh? Wow.

That is insane. Well, maybe we can, maybe we can, like, tie that dead peasant to the horse. And that can be, like, a fun, like it's a duo. So, Aaron, like you said, Doctors in the Moonlight. Doctors implies, too. So now we have our Doctors in the Moonlight. moonlight. Yeah. Perfect. Thanks Adela and JPC. I'm Aaron and I'm here on Cunt Watch. That's right. I'm counting how many times my male co-hosts have said cunt this episode and how many

times I had said it before just now. Casey, bleep her. I've said it twice. It's crazy to have her say that. Just bleepers out, please. Back to you Adela and JPC. You cunts. UK listeners are like, why are they making such a big deal of those? That's what they called Baywatch of the UK. Just cunt. Not even Cunt watch, just cunt. Well, you know, it's a new almost that it's a new year. It's mid-October. It's a brand new year. What's a new year? What calendar? What is this a new year? Pagan. Pagan.

Yeah? Kind of, you know? Pagan. Pagan? Pagan? It's a pagan calendar? It's a pagan calendar? Musical guest. Pagan calendar. It's a brand new year. We're happy that you're celebrating it with us. We know that you could be anywhere. And I think you can be anywhere else in the world. You could be anywhere in the world. We got two dead animals. One's a person. The other one may or may not be a seahorse. Hey, rule of threes. Three dead animals. Pull out. Dead animal on a wagon. What are we looking at here?

Tadda. Did you say to da or hot dogs? What did I say? I think I said to-da. Hot dogs. Aaron, what do we have here? The dog lizard. I fed it hot dogs. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. Pushes the wagon out of frame.

What were we talking about? Something funny, I bet. Aaron, that was a hot dog in one of those little Dunkin' Donuts L.L. Bean sweaters. It was. Cute. I'm not familiar with the Dunkin Donuts L.L. Bean sweater. Well, JBC, would you believe they come out tomorrow? Oh.

Oh. Just in time for... The New Year? What? Where would you wear one of these? To your court-mandated anger management? Your Honor, I'd like to see my kids. And to prove how serious I am, here is me wearing my Dunkin' Donuts. So here's what it is.

It is a L.O. Bean sweater for your cup of coffee. Oh, it's an L.L. Bean sweater for your cup of coffee. It's a coozy. But we obviously would never say that C-word on the show. No. And we apologize to everyone listening in, I want to say Finland. For who we upset by saying Coozy? Yeah, boy. Because they already have Lapland.

Yeah. This sucks. I'm looking at this online. This is a little Duncan L.L. Bean sweatshirt. Not only does it suck, it really sucks that, like, so many places are reporting it. And it's all like Boston Globe, Boston.com, Duncandonuts.com. Like, it's just like everyone in the Boston area is just only reporting on this. But then I do have another, I'm looking at the list of the people, you know, Food Network is on here as well. But the Portland Press Herald also is reporting it.

And I believe that that's got to be Portland, Maine, right? Oh, yeah. They're like, we're close enough to Boston that we could still talk about. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's talking about how they're dunking locations across Maine. So they're just trying to jump in on the Boston end. action on the Duncan action. Do they, they care about Duncan Donuts in Maine, too, Aaron, I'm assuming? They consider themselves Duncan Donuts territory as well. I think so. This is a literal territory.

You guys know about the Duncan Donuts, which and the shadow she casts over New England. Well, I know it's sort of a Hatfields-McCoy situation with Starbucks and Duncan. Right. On the U.S. map. And Connecticut is where the line is. And every year, right before Christmas, everyone brings those, like, travel coffee mugs. and then they shake them and spray them at each other, which doesn't make sense because they're not carbonated, right? So why would that? Why did they do that?

They're spraying hot coffee at each other? Yeah. And that words of the Duncan Witch? Well, you have to make sacrifices to the Duncan Witch. Wow. Do you guys, we only learn about regional history, huh? Yeah. It's so crazy.

I can't believe they don't teach about the Duncan Witch in schools. That's wild. Yeah, Maine is in her territory. Okay. Yeah. Now, Aaron, this is for you to say yay or nay to. Of course. What was the brand that your famous sweater was from?

Farm Rio. Okay. Could we, you, make some hay riddle, coffee sweaters that are exact replicas of the Farm Rio sweater? And is there a way for us to skirt around the legal issue of replicating a design? I wonder if they'll sue me if I say, I didn't mean to. I didn't know any better. Now, Duncan makes coffee, so it makes sense that they have a little sweater to go in the coffee cup. We make bullshit.

So what could we put, what could we wrap our bullshit around? Like, what is it? You could put bullshit in a coozy. You could, hey. Sort of a catch-all. What if we make a seat for coffee? That feels like one of those homsy phrases of like, you can put. A bullshit in a coozy.

Hot coffee. Let's make a coozy that makes cold coffee hot and hot coffee cold just to piss people off. Oh, okay. Yeah. Technology. I just want to slap a sweater on coffee here and I don't want to have to create something. Grok make a technology that makes cold coffee, hot coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee.

And then Grock does it. And then it's, okay. And then Grock does like this cool, totally not woke joke that makes the whole room laugh. Right, Elon? That's right, Aaron. In 30 years, we will not need coffee. In 30 years, we will not need coffee.

You all just be motivated to work for me. Full self-drinking. Full self-drinking coffee. In the next four months, no one will be drinking coffee. Coffee will be being drunk by you. Not if the Dunkin Witch has anything to say

about it, billionaires. Yeah, she can swim. I like to dunk him. I like to dunk him in a goddamn ditch. The Duncan ditch. Elon Muskin I'm dunking you in a ditch. And you fucking... JPC, you don't mean it.

You're just mad. You might have to bleep some of this stuff. You're just mad. You don't mean it. You're just upset. Yeah, you're right. You're right. I'm just upset.

But I'm fine. I'm cooling down. Like my hot dunk and coffee. I'm cooling down. Well, speaking of you can put bullshit in a coozy or whatever we said. Today we're going to play a little game known as... What's that Sinatra song? In other words...

In other words, what's that song? I did it my way. Now, I know what you're thinking, because he said, Sondatra's song, and your brain immediately said, stop listening to anything else he's saying and just say, I did it my way. My brain did the same thing. Am I wrong?

I don't know. I don't know who's right. I don't know who to believe. In other words. In other words. In other words. I guess that isn't my way. You're right.

You're right about what I did. I only know Sinatra. Like, I don't think I've ever sat down and listened to, like, a Sinatra album. I don't think I've ever, like, been like, let's hear what his whole Uvro was about. I think I know him from, like, songs from Ocean's 11 movies, and that's it. Would you believe that's Mel Tourme? Oh, fuck me. No, I'm just kidding.

So this is called, in other words, and what it is, is I'm going to say, hopefully, a semi-well-known phrase or adage. but it'll be in other words. So, for example, if I were to say young men act like young men, you might... Boys will be boys. Boys will be boys. Boys will be boys. Boys? Um, Adel, that's a great example.

I love that example. I feel like I'm absolutely fucking ready to dig into the rest of these. Can we take a little break first? Yeah, of course. Let's all drink our coffee. Boys will be boys. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. Oh, guys, I ate too much website.

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You can't eat the websites. What are they talking about? Hey, everybody. It's JPC. Well, it happened again. I was in the market for a weather balloon. I had stopped at a roadside weather balloon stand. And as I was browsing, kind of the new weather balloons, the 2026s, the 2027s that have just kind of hit the lot.

They release and fall of the previous year. I got all of my clothes snagged on a weather balloon and the dang thing took off and took all of my clothes with it. So completely naked and I'm thinking to myself, JPC, why does this keep happening to you? And then I thought, what doesn't matter, my friend? Because you can go to Quince. Quince focuses on high-quality wardrobe staples made with premium materials like 100% Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton, and marino wool. The styles are timeless, versatile, and designed to become the dependable pieces you reach for day after day.

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more specifically, it was JPC who got all as close stolen by a weather balloon. It's the best way to support the show. And JPC, Aaron, good day. I hope you notice my solid gold clothing. Wow. Whoa. Clink, clink, clink, clink. It's just I've saved so much money with Rock Money. Have you heard? Have you seen? Oh, yeah. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings and buy an awesome outfit made of gold at all. I mean, yeah, that's truly made of gold. I mean, it looks soft, but heavy. Malleable, yes. Yeah. Is it comfortable? No.

Well. But looking good. Because sometimes... It looks good. You look great. I love Rocket Money. I've been used. using it since way before they were a sponsor. I love how it consolidates my checking, saving loans and investments into a single dashboard and gives me a clear picture of where I'm at. I just moved recently and I've been loving rocket money because it's helping me see how much I'm going over a budget and some of my little categories. And I go, oops, I've bought in too many new vases for my new house, my vase budget won a couple hundred over. That's okay. Because I'm saving money by it's canceling all my unwanted subscriptions. Yeah, you can also

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slash riddle. Addle, there's a lightning storm. I didn't pay attention to science in science class. Are you safe from lightning when wearing all gold? I don't know. I don't know either. Let's see what happens. Rocketmoney.com slash riddle. All right. Let's do this. Let's fucking crush these. Well, that coffee hit your bloodstream right quick. Oh my goodness. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, baby. Coffee's in needles now, Aaron. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's why I have to be very very very. Very careful.

Got to find your coffee vein. That's what I call my throat. Here's the first one. I use it like Botox. My face is a mess. And I'm so sorry. We'd have to take a quick detour. Aaron, what's going on?

I was going to say I use coffee instead of Botox in the needles. They put coffee in the needles. And now my face is all messed up. In the name of beauty and staying young forever. They need to have like a, like a Botox opposite. That's like short use. For all of the celebrities that do too much Botox, and then it's not celebrities, I mean actors,

all the actors that do too much Botox and then lose control of any facial reaction muscles, I think that they need to, like, shoot them with coffee or something that loosens them up just for the day, and then they can go back to being, you know, whatever they're trying to be, I guess, like statues or whatever. I don't know what they're going for, but I've had almost enough of actors with absolutely no facial range.

We're about done with that. When their faces, move, you realize how much of a difference it makes. I was watching Kirsten Dunst in something recently and her face moved so much and I was like, oh my animal brain can so be

along for the journey that you're on. She's also just a great actress, but like I was like, that makes the biggest difference. Leave your face alone. Yeah, just do everything else, but leave the face. We need the face. Have it move at least. Keep your laugh lines. Do it for me.

Keep your laugh lines for me. Casey says that is almost kind of a real thing, right? Where they time the Botox shots to be between work because it softens a bit after a while. Whoa. Oh, interesting. Thanks Casey for being Hollywood watch. Okay, Casey. Now I'm going to have to look at Casey.

His camera's off, but I'm like, this guy knows too much about Botox for him to not be a practitioner himself. A ton of work done. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Casey Tony of work done. Casey Tony of work done. Here's our first one. In other words, maintain your snout to be sanitary.

Keep your nose clean. You got it, Aaron. Keep your nose clean. Keep your nose clean. How about... Do we know the etymology of keep your nose clean? Do we know why? Fascinating by that, but I don't know...

I don't know what that means or why it means that. I do want to see a scene. Okay. The two of you are in medieval England. and this is sort of the origin of that being like a really necessary thing to tell people. Right. What's on your face? Oh, it's on my phone?

Normal, normal stuff that's on everyone's face. Shit, dirt, bits of bread, oh, let's see, hair. Blood, not a blood. There's something missing. Are you right? It's not a thing on your face. It's a lack of thing. thing. What is it? Is this skin?

Are you nagging me? I don't smell... Are you inventing nagging? Well, my... My name is Elizabeth Negg, is it not? I don't know. I don't know your name, miss, but I'd like to. You're clean. Hold on. Hold on. You're clean. No, no, no, I'm not clean. I'm not clean. No, it's... I got everything normal on my face, like dirt and piss and shit and bugs. Smells like lemons and Linnens and

You took a bath He took a bath What? No Hey all I want to Can you take my bath Can you? Keep your voice down

I didn't take a bath Okay okay Okay Bath taker Shut up my bath I did I took a bath It feels fucking wonderful

Okay That makes you sick We stay Healthy And live long lives If we don't get clean I thought so too That's why I took a bath

It was a moment of despair I wanted to die And I said this is how I'd do it I take a bath And then the grim reaper comes And touches me with his bony skeletal finger But it didn't happen I feel great

I feel like 10 pounds lighter I feel like free William Clorox I swear If you've stopped some sort of trend In this direction I'll be mean to you until it gets you to fall in love with me, so help me.

Well, I am married already because I'm 15, but... Off with our head! Classic. Classic. Classic. Classic people being named after the products that eventually... What if Clorox was like? Yeah, Clorox, we are 700 years old.

We're a company that is 700 years old. Are there any companies that are 700 years old? Zest. Pepsi. Johnson and Johnson, I think. What's like the oldest company? The oldest company. Now here's the thing, and this isn't the oldest company,

but it's always surprising to me when you find out, like Nintendo has been around since like the 1800s, and it's like, wait, Nintendo. And it's like, yeah, they used to make playing cards and then they, you know, spun off into video games and stuff. So, it is... Casey says the company of good friends, Casey, you've got to stop. Tomato.

Oh, man. Tomato I was going to be like Dutch East Trading company Trading company They're probably not around no more Huh?

Harvard University Oh yeah Oxford I think Oxford was like Around Before like the Careful at all

Can I say the facts wrong Before like the Aztec Empire or something Okay Oxford was I'm looking at the Wikipedia of list of oldest companies And would you believe it? there's a lot of them in places that are in America.

Wow. Now, there's like, there is, there claims to be. Now, I don't know if, I don't know if this is, this can be corroborated. But the oldest company looks to be a construction company in Japan called Congo Gumi. I may be mispronouncing it. And it says it's from the year 578. Now, there's also a hotel from the year 705 in Japan. that looks to be a, yeah, it looks to be an existing hotel that was founded 1,321 years ago.

Can you imagine Aaron being like Lisa Congajumi and you're like the only child and you're like, you know what? Fashion. And they're like, honey, please. We are literally on internet lists. You wouldn't even believe how many lists were on on the internet. When people Google, oldest companies, it's us. Please go into construction. I just want to dance.

No, you don't. No, you don't. Can you dance in a building? In Japan, there is a word for a business that has been in operation for at least 100 years, some more than a thousand years. And it's Shanise, S-H-I-N-I-S-E. And it translates to long-established business. And they are prestigious in Japan. That's awesome.

It would be so cool that means from a country with a fucking history and not like ours that's got a not very good history. What do you mean? Well, that's like, I feel like poking around Japan of like, oh, what should I do in like Kyoto? They'll be like, oh, here's a candy, here's a place that's been selling and making candy for 400 years. And you stop and you're like, what? What's that now? You're like, I've been to a Denny's that's been around since the 50s, but that's maybe the oldest thing in America I've been to. Guys, this hotel in Japan that was founded in 705 that is, as of this year, 1,321 years old,

I'm pleased as punch to let you guys know that the hotel has password-free Wi-Fi. Whoa. Well, of course, Wi-Fi said for something else back then. JPC, can you quickly do a quick Google search of how long Oxford has been around? Because I fear that my statement of Oxford is older than the Aztec Empire is cartoonishly wrong.

I will say that Oxford, University in this Wikipedia article is cited several times, but just the university, like, dating things. But Oxford University is not listed as one of like the oldest things. And they go back to the oldest goes back to things that were from 1699. So I don't know if I don't know about Oxford being the oldest. Let's see. How old is Oxford? I don't know. It doesn't it doesn't seem like it is founded. Now that seems like they're hiding something. If we can't find out when they were founded. Okay, it says there's evidence of teaching as early as 1096, but that doesn't. Whoa. I don't know if that makes sense.

1096. The number one thing people ask is, is Oxford older than Aztec? And it says, yes, Oxford University is older than the Pontiac Aztec, which came out in 2007. Oh, wait. So that's what people is. This kind of communication makes me go, how does anybody think that a religious that was invented thousands of years ago hasn't been sort of misinterpreted.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You guys, they can't even make it pat through two guys. Boys will be boys. What are we doing? All right, fine, Erin. Let's just see you do any better. Okay, let's Google something.

Tell me anything. I will convey the information accurately to you. Ask me about anything. Is religion correct? Let's see. Let's do... Which religion is the right religion?

Depends on your definition of truth. Okay. Hmm. There's contradictory claims, if you can believe it. Huh. What about... Okay, can you Google... Okay, so you can Google...

I can make Aaron Google anything that I want. What about Famca Jansen Hug controversy? Oh. No. What about Who's the woman who sings TikTok? TikTok.

Oh, a Kesha. What about Kesha Seinfeld hug controversy? Google that. Aaron, do you know about this? What are the other hug controversies that we can trick Aaron to Googling? The Kesha one is so uncomfortable,

but she did not, she had the last laugh, did she not? I think so. Yeah, oh yeah. Did she? I think so. Oh, man. I, okay. I think that we should do riddles because I can't think of a hug controversy.

How about, here's another, in other words, recompense from within to out of the snout. Recompense from within to without from the snout. Snout? Recompense from within to out. Not on the nose. Aaron, very close. You said not on the nose. Something on the nose.

Very, very close. Out of the nose. Give out the mouth. Excuse me? Give out the mouth. Don't nose the mouth that fees you. Give, give with the mouth, but take with the nose. Recompense.

So this is going to be the transfer. of money. Pa paid paid paid paid paid out the mouth I paid out the mouth for this ass Or out Or or Or something out the nose

Yeah combined those two ideas Oh I paid out the nose Pay out the nose Pay out the nose Which means you're paying way too much right Yeah I think so Nose do you think that literally happened to someone And this is why we have that phrase

Yes JPC Some men gave all All men gave nose. Huh. Hold on. I'm not stupid. You guys treat me like I'm stupid and I'm not.

You guys treat me like I'm stupid, but I'm smart. I'm not stupid like everyone says. Some men gave all. All men gave nose. I just feel like I watched someone try to attempt to do a backflip after not practicing doing a backflip, didn't land it, and then got super hostile to everyone in the room. Okay. I do need to see JPC.

sorry to do this to you. Aaron, Aaron's going to help you out in this, but this is going to be, this is like Ken Burns, a documentary voiceover, and you did not sleep the night before, so you did not sort of go over the script at all. So you're just trying to make up facts as you go along, and this is for the Civil War.

And Aaron, you're sort of the voiceover director, and you have to chime in to kind of help out everyone so long. Got it. Okay, so you'll just roll the footage and I'll read the voiceover. Yep. Yep. And then a lot of what we're going over today is just sort of like love letters back and forth between some soldiers and their wives back at home. So just whatever you're ready. And again, that sort of warm tone that we're trying to that we talked about when we hired you.

Awesome. And can I get you a water or anything? No, I know it's hot in here. You look pretty sweaty. I'm fine. Yeah, I'm a professional, so I'm fine. Okay. And action. The American Civil War. Sure. We all know the story.

Sometime in the spring of 1860s. Up until the spring of later on. I guess I have two things. Yes, I'm sorry? One is please read the copy in front of you. In the copy in front of me, okay. And two is we can see the reflection. Yeah, I didn't have dates on here.

Right. Just read the letters. So just read the letters. So, and I would say we can see the reflection of you trying to order Taco Bell from Uber Eats off your phone. We can see it. The app has me blocked, so I have to go through Uber Eats. I'd rather go through the app, but they have to be blocked. Well, we're going to take lunch in a couple hours.

Sure. Let's just get into it. So let's focus up. All right. And action. We all know the story of years of intense combat, brother against. brother, father against nephew, cousins, at war.

But what about the personal stories of the soldiers who were deeply... We can't take a little bit of throw-up dribble out of post, so just take that part again. Yeah, of course. But you could take it out of post, so it's not... No, we can't. We can't.

We cannot. Yeah, sorry, I should pronunciate. Pronunciate. Annunciate, classic main. Big flog. And sorry, if we could just take that again and you say pronounce. I'm so sorry, I'm a little however.

And if you could pronounce your words and enunciate a little better. Sure. Most of the soldiers who fought in the Civil War were illiterate, but a select few knew their letters and could use their letters to write back to their sweetheart at home

to give them good tidings of what was going on. Like this letter from 18, Okay, we can see you sending a text. Oh my gosh. I realized I called you 14 times last night. I know we talked about going no contact for a while. We can see the reflection in the...

I know we're talking about going no contact for a while. I'm still talking. I'm still typing. I'll type you guys you're talking. Yeah. Okay. You know what? Yeah.

The drunk actions are sober thoughts, and I really thought maybe now was the time to reconnect. Am I not allowed to do... If as long as I'm talking, am I not allowed to do two things at once? I mean, I'm talking. I'm saying everything I need to say. That's a good point. If you could just jump right in from the start of the letter, that would be great. Professionals don't interrupt as much.

Just so you know, I've done all the Dragon Fire books. I read that whole series. We cut to a snippet of the Dragon Fire Books. Jacobs heaving penis heaved breathlessly in his pantaloons. Hey, yep. You're leaving this on a voicemail for me. me. We talked about going no contact, okay? Same.

You're not contacting me. He contacted Jacob from the Dragonfire books. I'll tell you what. I'll tell you one thing I know for certain. If I buy an audiobook and it starts with Jacob, I'm turning it off. If you make Jacob a 22-syllable word, I am not continuing. All right, fine, read it. So, who knows how to read?

Okay, cool. So you better than half the people in the Civil War. Great. Rag It would be funny Civil War letters And it's like a woman Writing this beautiful

Poetic sort of Ten page letter To her husband at war And then him writing back And realizing he doesn't know how to write Oh Bole at her out Maybe I'll just put my handprint

And I'll draw a turkey She'll love that Ladies love turkey It's just a picture She gets it back It's just a picture of a turkey with a flag or something. She's like, what the hell?

It's a bunch of just like shapes. My husband. Triangles and stars and squares and stuff up in the corner. What's that on the fridge? My husband's at war. And Aaron, your rap persona is LLT. Ladies Love Turkey. Ladies love turkey.

And it goes to something like this. I love... I'm not going to rap. Don't worry, everybody. I think my rap name is Ladies Love Cool James. And a friend is like, maybe we just do LL Cool James. Maybe that's a little smoother. Here we go.

Here's another, in other words. Okay. Water source of formative years. Water source, river lake. River of childhood. Oceans. Oceans of Youth. There you go, Aaron.

Got it. I'm such a fucking idiot. I said, River of childhood. I'm going to fucking, I can't even fucking believe how dumb I was just now in front of all people who listen. This is so vulnerable to be this dumb in front of this many people. I'm sitting on my house. I'm minding my business. I'm trying to live my life and I have to

log on to be this dumb in front of all of you. You understand how horrible this is? Aaron, someone gave nose. I know. I know and I know that you guys also feel, I'm talking to people who I think should have empathy for me here. Isn't this just so horrible sometimes to be this vulnerably dumb in front of people?

You too not as much as me. My My hit rate for dumbness is way higher, of course. No, I got that pretty high. River of childhood? Oh, okay, I'd like to see a scene. Okay, yeah, please. JPC, you are someone going to the fountain of youth. Adel, you're the fountain.

And Adel, you think that JPC is so old that you're not even able to help. Like, it's not even worth it. Got it. After so many years of searching, I finally found it, the fountain of youth. Now to taste the cool waters and transform into the man of my youth. Hey, listen!

You have found, oh, no, oh no. Hello? Oh, the fountain, you're talking to me. I'm just going to take a quick sip, if that's okay. Hold up, hold up. Don't dip that old glove. Don't get that old glove into the... Of course.

Of course. We should talk, we should talk, we should talk, ground rules, whatever, because you're going to give me, you know, youth or whatever. I don't want to be too young. Yeah, I don't think we have to worry about that. Listen, my wife is quite a bit younger than me, but not, I don't want to be younger than her. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to go down too.

I don't want to make her a pedophile, if you know what I'm saying. Would you believe that's the first time someone's said that word at the Fountain of Youth? So you're on the board, buddy. That's good, right? That's got to be good. if it's the first time someone said pedophile at the Fountain of Youth? I don't think it's good.

Good for you. Why? How? It would be bad if a bunch of people were here saying pedophile, right? Hey, listen, we we here at the fountain. That's a good question, too, Fountain of Youth.

Like, if I drink the water and I become a little boy, and then I have a consensual. Get this guy out of here. I'm still engaging in this. I'm trying. Don't people like with people this messed up. Sexual relationship with my wife, who's 40 years younger than me, but, you know, at that point,

is she a pedophile? Or I'm actually, it's like the person from, it's like the movie big, right? We're unfamiliar. We've only seen Splash. We've only seen Splash. Don't think there's a pedophile in Splash. Get out of here, man. I'm saying that.

I'm here. Just, hey, let me take a drink, okay? No. No. Come on. No. You need to go to the... We've never been drier.

Get out of here. Go now. You need to go to the middle-aged waterfalls. Look, I just think it's rude and actually kind of productive to not let people drink under the fountain of youth because they said the word pedophile. Stop saying. Get him out of here. That's like people turn it off a podcast because someone says the word cunt. Even if it makes sense.

It's in context, you know? Thanks, Adela and JPC. A little bit of a delay over here for me, Aaron, on Cunt Watch. We are up to another cunt from JPC of JPC. I'm here with JPC to talk about how he just said the word cunt on a podcast. JPC? Actually, that was a character. So that's the fun thing about improv.

Was it? Your voice sort of sounded similar. Oh, I sound a little younger. Okay. Eric, come on. You have kind of the same. energy you do now. Oh, yeah.

I'm that pedophile guy. That's what you're saying. You're saying, I have a pedophile energy. Casey, clip that. Back to you, Adel. Save. Wow. I think that's a good time to go on another little break.

You mean, like, for the podcast, like, take a year off or something? Like, Adel and I get, like, a year off. Think about how we got here. We'll be right back. Guys, I. just made you my favorite new drink. It's called a summer sandy. So it's like basically, are you familiar with a shandy?

Like half beer, half lemonade? Yeah, yeah, sure. It's a shandy, half beer, half lemonade, but half sand. Huh. Looks like the sand absorbed all the beer. Yes, and it's very clumpy and it's not wet. Oh, good. Yes, then that's the feeling that you're going for.

Oh, Aaron, it's very clumpy. Eddie Murphy? Is our guest Eddie Murphy? I think it might be Sandy. No, it's gritty. Oh, even better. You didn't know what he sounded like. It's me.

Sounds like me. That would be quite funny. It would be hilarious. I remember being overseas a long, long time ago as a kid and seeing my name on a menu. And I think it was like they misspelled Shandy or that's how they said it in the country. I was like, oh, great, what's that? And they're like beer and lemonade. And I was like, no thanks.

Not this time. Not this time. Very good. Yeah. Now I do. I've never been a big shandy guy. And I don't drink anymore. But even when I did, I was like, I don't think I'm a big combination drink guy.

I think I like, I don't like it when people get too, like. Chummy with each other. Like your armhole separated from your palmer. Exactly. Well, speaking of mixing things up. That's it. I don't know if anything to do with that. Great transition.

That felt great. No. That felt great. Fucking phenomenal. Speaking of fucking things. Fucking things up. I have a game. So I'm sure we're all familiar with the improv game where you're given a prompt

and you're having to tell the audience how sex with you is like that thing. Of course. We are going to do that in reverse, so to speak. I'm going to give you a bunch of clues. The audience is going to fuck me? I'm going to give you a bunch of clues for a given word. or a phrase that fills in the first blank, but I'm going to give you the second blank.

So I'm going to say sex with me is like blank because and then give you a bunch of reasons and you tell me what that blank is. Okay, I guess so. All right, so sex with me is an example. Sex with me is like blank because I'll always keep you stiff and I'm an animal.

So for those two, you might say taxidermy. Oh, great. I love it. This is fun. This is great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's no wrong answers except I only have one right answer. Great. You know. Yeah.

But there's no wrong ones. There's no wrong ones, but they're only one right one. Yeah. With me is like taxidermy, I got some at a Montana yard sale. Yes, please add your own. Because we're going to definitely. Sex with me is like taxidermy, unblinking. Oh, shit.

Right. Well upon me for trying to do jokes. No, no, no, no. Coming to the table of jokes. We're just monsters and we can't. We can't not say stuff like this. Oh, that's great. I actually wanted to do it.

Okay. Sex with me is like blank because, and I'll give you, I'll give you one and give you a chance of guess. And then if you don't get it, I'll give you another. And I have up to three or four for each one. Sex with me is like taxidermy. It takes six to eight hours of the ice. Never look right.

Sex with me is like blank. It's very sandy. The beach. The beach. Sex with me is like the beach. It's very sandy. That works. That's not what I had in mine.

Like I said, no wrong. answers, except for one. Yeah, hourglass. What else is Sandy? Reese? Is it Sandor? Is it just you? It's just me. All of these are me. It's just about sex with me. The planet from Dune. Oh, Arachus. Sadly, that is correct. I can't even give you my second clue, Aaron. Sex with me is like Arachus?

Nice. Sex with me is like Dune because when you put your hand in my box, it'll hurt like hell. Sex with me is like Dune Because we reuse fluids Holy shit Is that what they do in Dune? I'm starting to feel very self-conscious Sex with me is like Dune Because after we do it Yul Zadaya

Yeah I couldn't think of any others That was it for me on Dune Sex with me is like blank Because there's lots of tea bagging American Revolution The United Kingdom No

Sex with me is like blank because A pussy is going to be very happy Tea banking pussy Oh boy I feel like I should know this This is my zone Sex with me is like blank because When you eat me you're gonna grow huge Alice in Wonderland

Alice in Wonderland And the last one I have for that one is A furry is going to come but not for a while. I want to think of one house in Wonderland. Yeah. Um, uh, fuck. I'm going to think of one in the middle of the night.

Okay, hold on. You guys, you guys do them and then I will do mine. The whole time Aaron is just pencil the paper. Can I, can I say something about my rabbit hole? Should we wait for Aaron or keep going? Um, on birthday, you're late.

I'm going to tell you're late the whole time. Oh, yeah, being late. That was a good one too. We definitely need Aaron for this. We have to let Aaron finish. I'll be... Oh, sex with things like Allison Wonderland because I have no problem having sex with my red queen.

Put down a towel. Sex with me is out, Gales from Wonderland. I'm going to be late the... Fuck, fuck. Just keep going. I'm just going to be my worst self for the rest of the episode. Damn it. Sex with me is like blank because the sheets are going to get messy.

Wawa. Wawa? That's awesome. Sheets is a local Pennsylvania or it's like a Wawa-esque station right? Oh, got it. They're the ones of the competition.

It's like blank because we try to find balance but it rarely works. Microsoft Suite? Microsoft Word? Try to find balance but it All right. The sheets are going to get messy and we try to find balance. Yeah.

Actuaries. Yeah, yeah. Bookkeeping. Bookkeeping. Bookkeeping. Got another one? Sex with me. is like bookkeeping, I'm always in the red.

There you go. God, what am I? Sex with me, it's like bookkeeping? Um, uh, uh, excuse me. No, that's not, never mind. Sex with me is like bookkeeping. You're gonna see P, eh? Sex with me is like bookkeeping. I excel at it. There you go. Sex with me is like Alice in Wonderland. Nothing is the right size. Sex with me is like blank because there's lots of railing.

Balcony? Skateboarding. He's skateboarding. Aaron, you're too good at this. You don't give me time to get to my second and third ones. Sex with me is like a skate park. You're going to find someone riding goofy. And sex with me is like a skate park.

You're going to have to wear elbow pad. You're going to ride me until you're tired or you bring. A break a bone. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Sex with me is like blank. There's a very stiff man. Mm.

Sex with me is like blank. I want you to come in fancy clothes. A wedding? Sex with me is like blank. Jack Nicholson is there for some reason. Oh, the movie Anger Management. Stiff man, fancy clothes. There's always a, it's always being watched by

Jack Nicholson. Stiff. Oh, oh, oh, the Nick, yeah. Is it the Knicks? Is that what he watches? He wishes the Lakers, but the Lakers. The Stiff man would be. It's the Oscars. Oh.

Oh, the Oscars. Give me an Oscars one. Sex with me is like the Oscars. There's going to be a grouch there. Nice. Sex with me is like the Oscars. You have to campaign for it. Sex with me is like the Oscars.

I'm buttoned up in the streets, but I'm a freak in the Streeps. Sex with Me is like the Oscars. Conan O'Brien hosts and no one appreciates it in the moment. Sex with Me as like the Oscars, it's an honor to be nombed. It's so white. Sex with Me is like the Oscars, I'd be nothing without my production staff. I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about.

I'm still thinking about Alice in Wonderland, you guys. Of course you are. Of course you are. Sex with me is like blank, someone's going to suck. Dyson, Hoover, vacuum. No. Sex with me is like blank, someone's going to bite. Vampires.

Vampires. Vampires. Your face will turn very white. Sex with me is like the Oscars. Warren Beatty gets it wrong again. Sex with me is like the Oscars. There's going to be a slap that everyone's talking about. Eric.

Eric, very good. That's very good. Very good. Wait, what's the one that you just said? Vampires. Vampire. Sexony is like a vampire. We already did a lot of blood stuff.

What's another thing? What's another approach I can take? Upside down. Yeah. We're going to hang upside down. He already says something about suck, but I want to do something about suck it. Sex with me is like a vampire. I can't see myself in a mirror.

Yeah. That's awesome. Huh. Sex with me is like. a vampire. You don't have to be dead to do it, but it helps. You're underwent to enjoy it? He's like a vampire.

It's only with people who are like 100-something years old. Yeah, that's good. I'm always coughing. Nice. All right. Sex with me is like blank because someone will use a whip. Indiana Jones. It is Indiana Jones.

Sex with me is like Indiana Jones It'll melt your face And sex with me is like Indiana Jones Every time you say my name I think I'll think you're talking about my dad Sex with me is like Indiana Jones Me and my dad fuck the same Nazi There we go

Sex with me is like Indiana Jones Why did it have to be sex Sex with me is like a vampire It sucks There we go here Sex with me is like Indiana Jones I I'll

You think you're not going to get it at the last second and then you do Like his half Sex with me is like Indiana Jones I learned I got it from the dog You're gonna be running away From a giant ball

Yeah yeah Oh there's something with giant ball That could be very appealing Sex with me is like Indiana Jones But in Latin sex starts with a drag We smoke weed before we have sex Sex with me is like Indiana Jones The second one won't be very good

Oh yeah Sex with me is like a vampire I only come at night Only come at night. Very good, Aaron. Only come at night, very good. Sex with me is like, blank. There's a monkey involved for some reason.

Indiana Jones, too. Chilled monkey brain. God damn it, Aaron. Sorry. Sex with me is like friends. There's a monkey involved for some reason. You'll be mad if we take a break, and you'll be dreaming of Tom Selleck the whole time.

Sex with me is like friends. Could I be wearing any more clothes? We're all running towards it. We're all running towards it, and I got there first, and I ran right past you out all, and I grabbed the back of your ankle, and I ripped. I was running towards sex with me as like friends, pivot, pivot, pivot. Oh, see, I had sex with me as like friends. What am I doing? That rocks.

That's good. Well, God, there's got a these. Sex with me as like friends. Paul Rudd's there near the end. Mm-hmm. Sex with me is like I want to There has to be some version of like

I feeby on my chandelor till I Ross or something like that I don't have the combination of it But it's there's something there We're always going in each other's apartments Oh yeah We're always coming in each other's apartments Uh Yeah

Sex with me as like friends There's an ugly naked guy Wasn't that like a thing Yeah Yeah nice that's a good one That's very good Sex with Me is like blank, I'll beg you for more. Oliver Twist.

It is Oliver Twist. You're so good at. Why is this the only one I've ever been good at? Sex with me is like Oliver Twist, I'll beg you for more, and you'll put your dick in. That's all I got. I don't know anything else about Oliver Twist. Sex with me is like Oliver Twist. I get paid per the word, per word.

Yeah. Okay. I wanted to do something with Fagan. I'll let you. do it. Something with orphan? Is there something with orphan in it? I don't know.

I fucking don't know. I'll artfully dodge your calls after. I like that, Aaron. Yay. Sexism me is like blank. I'll demand that you stroke harder. Rowing. Yes, but it's not exactly what I was after.

It's the right reference. Vikings? Yes, it's Vikings. Sexism to me is like Vikings. I'll be literally horny. Love. And I'll spread my seat. all over.

Cold and salty. This is a stretch, guys. Bear with me here. Sex with me is like a Viking. You'll be asking, what was the pill age of? I don't. Hey, it's okay. Rest now. Kisses you on the forehead,

tuck you in the bed, go to bed. You've done good today. Time to rest. Okay, that's all we got from Viking. Yeah, go on. No, no, no. Yeah. Long ship.

Sex with me is like blank. It's better when we smash. Burgers. It is burgers. Sex with me is like burgers. You'll squirt all over my bun. And I prefer it from five guys. Oh, nice.

You have to flip me for me to finish. Oh, very good. Wendy's is technically better, but I'm cheaper. You have to go in and out. Oh, very good. Yeah, oh, in and out. Oh, I like that. Sex with me is like burgers, and I'm hungry, Jack.

Nice. It's very cheesy when you bite into my pickle. Give me 40 more minutes on this. Burgers. Make it a double. Animal style. Animal style. Animal style.

Animal style. Animal style. Of course, edible style. Sandy, I'm getting pissed off. Oh, Jesus, I'm so sorry. Sex with me is like burgers. If you're lucky, sometimes there's a little extra onion ring in there. Ew, where?

What? Where? Don't worry about it. Where? You're going to like it. You could have said ring, and that would have been enough. You're like, no, I'm going to make an onion ring. Sex with me is like, hey, riddle, riddle,

Aaron's going to get pissed off. Yep. Sex with me is like blank. Everyone lies about how big it is. Fishing? Yeah. Sex with me is like fishing. Put on something sparkly and I'll come.

Nice. It starts with a line and ends with the hooks coming out. Sex with me is like fishing. Peaceful. Sex with me is like fishing. I never catch anything, condoms. Sex with me is like fishing. Whatever you do, don't click my links.

That's nice. P.H. I am trying to think of certain fish. Oh, yeah. Sex with me is like fishing. I might carp the bed. No? Carpfeel?

Carpa feel. Carpa feel is good. Carpa feel is really nice. What do you do after carpa feel once someone says that? Yeah, carpafel is really nice. I like the way that carpa feels. Coming out of your mouth? Sex with me is like fishing.

It smells like fish. Sometimes. So, so true. Oh, sex with me is like fishing. I'm going to tackle that box. That's awesome. That's awesome. Sex with me is like fishing.

I only do it with Annette. He was a friend of mine named Annette. That's nice for Annette. Yeah, it's good for Annette. All right. Sex with Me is like blank. Lots of angry bitches. A dog pound.

Close. Kettle? Closer. Lots of angry bitches, lots of hungry pussies. Animal shelter? Yeah, closer. Someone's strapping. Yeah, the vet.

Someone's strapping me to a table to probe me with a piece of metal. Okay, sex with the vet. Okay, that's very nice. You want me to cut my nails before. Oh. Sex with me is like the vet Oh, if it goes wrong If it goes wrong, you're going to want to go to sleep.

Sex with me is like a vet of the other kind. Thank you for your cervix. Jesus. Couple times a year you're going to want to come in for shots. I think that's stolen valor. I think that's stolen valor, Adel. No. If I thank someone for their cervix.

What'd you say, JPC? I said a couple times of you. You're going to want to come in me for shots. Let's let let's just love that this again. I like that one. All right. Sex with Me is like Blank. You won't understand what's happening until you're older.

Twin Peas. Is it a movie? A father's advice. Sex with me is like blank. I'm always happy to play bottom. Oh, Midsummer Night Stream. Shakespeare. Shakespeare.

And the girl parts are always played by guys. Nice. Give me 40 minutes. Okay. Sex with me means like Shakespeare. You'll be taming my shrew. Much agoo about nothing. Wow. About nothing is very good.

Sex with me is like Shakespeare exit pursued by a bear. Alas, poor soft dick I knew you well. Soft dick. Everyone dies in the end. We'll always be asking to pee or not to pee. A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse, cock. Jesus Christ. A comedy of errors.

Oh, it's 12 nights. It's, um. Hand me my longs hard ho. Sex with me as like Shakespeare. What I'm done, people thought I was eight different guys. You'll get a pound of flesh. Oh, oh, yeah. Shex with me as like Shakespeare.

I'm like the merchant of penis. Oh, I'll bite my thumb. There we go. Merchant of penis is insane, by the way. Oh, sex with me is like Shakespeare. They call me bottom the lever. Nice. Because I bottom it and then I go.

Sex with me is like Shakespeare. Yeah. I go. I'm going to head out. Parting is such sweet sorrow. Man. It's been so long since I've had to know anything about Shakespeare. I've actually been like, Shakespeare pound me bard?

It's in the park. It's in the park, yeah. It's in the park, yeah. Or in the round? If you prick me, do I not bleed? Kenneth Branon makes me understand it. Um, it's double Toil and Trouble.

There's three witches there. Eric, you're done. I'm done. We got to do another one. We got to do another one. Let's go on. Sex with me is like blank. You're going to see some tits.

Burlesque. Tits. Sex with me is like like, blank, you're going to see some cocks. A farm. A shitty zoo. Is it Lake Dicaca? Sex with me is like blank. You might witness a swallow if you're lucky.

Bird watching. Bird watching. Bird watching. Uh, sex with me is like bird watching. I'm a robin you. Sex with me is like bird watching. I love your huge noculars.

That's awesome. Sex with me is like bird watching. The elderly really enjoy coming. Can I go? Sex with me is like bird watching. I'm a hobby for perverts? Oh, God. Yeah, I don't know if it's like bird watching,

you can identify it by the sounds I make. Mm-hmm. Something about a woodpecker. Oh, oh, sex with me is like bird watching. You're going to eagret it. Aw. The self-deprecating ones are fun. Come on.

Let's move on. Sex with me is like blank. It's covered in cream. Eric Clapton and Reunion concert? Wow. Derek and the Domino's. Dessert. I know. Sex and things like blank, the Jews do it best.

I don't want to say. Dessert. Covered in cream and the Jews do it best. All right. Last one. Seder? There's a hole and then you eat it. Donut Bagels

Bagels Biggles Biggles Sex with me is like a bagel Better in New York There you go Sex with me is like a bagel It's all about the water

Exactly what you want when you're hungover Mm-hmm Uh Oh Sex with me is like a bagel You just tell me how you like it's bread Yeah I'll put everything on it

I'll put everything on it. All right. Oh, please. No, I got two more. Let's do two more. Let's do two more. Okay. Sex with me is like blank,

somebody's getting fingered. A lineup. Yeah, it's a lineup. We'll watch through a mirror, and it'll be me and four other guys who look just like me. Mm-hmm. A lineup.

up. God, I want to... It's the usual suspects. I was going to say, I'm like, I'm Kaiser-So-so. Kaiser-So-So. Kaiser-Soso! Yay! I love it.

I like Kaiser-S-Sos-So-M-Mu. There's your tattoo, J-PC. I like Kaiser-Sos-So. Says no whatever. All right, last one. Okay. Sex with me is like blank. Somebody's getting crabs.

Somebody's a ver. and you'll think it means something, but it doesn't. Virgin, Crabbs. Is this like a red lobster? Nope. Somebody's getting crabs. Someone's a virgin, and you'll think it means something, but it doesn't.

Horoscope? I'll give you one more. Astrology? Yeah, it's astrology. Oh, Adel got it. Yeah, Horoscope. Oh, you said it. Yeah, horoscope.

Yeah, horoscope. Yeah, not the same. Yeah. Well, there's something like very, On the nose was saying that I have a horoscope or something like that, you know? Where to go with that? Something, something coming I? Rising, something's rising.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Something about the moon. You'll read about it in the newspaper? Yeah. Yes, yes, yes. Man, yeah. Hmm. Well, perfect.

Kaiser-Soso. Guys are so-so. We couldn't ask for it. That's for a better ending than that. Sandy, speaking of ending, where can people find you in the work that you do? Sex with me is like my game Rattle.

It's an anagram of something more interesting. You can do it every day. You can do it every day. Yes. We're using the latter as a metaphor. It involves some kind of play before a word. Rattle is my daily word game at rattle. dot quest, R-A-D-D-L-E.

It is a daily word game you can play about transforming words into other words. It's very fun. I've been doing it for about almost, I don't know, a year and a half, more than a year and a half at this point, every day. And it's going great. So we've got about, I don't know, at this point, hopefully much

more than what I'm about to say, but at this, at the time of recording, we're about 11,000 players a day. That's crazy. That's very cool. Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. I also make puzzles at Mystery League as part of my business, which I do for corporate team building and other things.

So if you're looking for more puzzles in your life, get in touch, and probably some other cool stuff that I can't talk about. But that's what it is. Well, Sandy, sex with me is like the episode being over and you leaving the show because... It's sad. Oh, it's sad. That's very true. Very true.

Bye, Sandy. It's Kaiser Soso. Bye, Sandy. Peace. Aaron, JPC. Aaron, is there anything you'd like to plug or promote? I want to plug our Patreon. Patreon.com slash air ritter-rido.

Lots of fun stuff happening over there. Some ad-free versions of our early episodes that JPC has been working hard to get posted. We didn't used to have them there, and now they're there, and we're really excited about that. And lots of fun reviews, lots of fun games, Lots of fun live streams. Just some fun stuff going on over there.

I don't know anything to plug or promote. I would like to plug if you are someone who happens to be buying a horse or maybe you raise and breed horses. Yes. I would like to plug naming one of the horses, Doctors in the Moonlight. Now, doesn't have to go into horse racing, but I think it's just a fun little thing. If you have a horse and you name it, Doctors in the Moonlight, And to show how gracious of hosts we are, you could even ascribe that name to a lesser animal. Say your dogs, we're cats.

I think we should hold that for horse. I think we're worth that. I think we hold that for horse. And I will also say, if you're one of those people that raises horses to turn them into food, we, well, all three of us will eat doctors in the moonlight. No. On stream. No, dibs. Oh, here we have to.

No, I'm saying I'm doing that alone. Every girl's dream. Aaron's going to Kobayashi a horse on the stream. Dipping in water first. And I love where we're going as a country. Back to you. James has you anything to plug or promote or a review to read? Hey, let me read a review.

It's been a while. So this one is a five-star review from Rabidicus. This is a five-star review. You can get your review featured by leaving a five-star review anywhere you leave reviews. This one's called automobile wheel. Automobile wheel. Automobile wheel. Automobile wheel.

Automobile wheel. Automobile wheel. automobile wheel, automobile wheel, automobile wheel, let's see if JPCS still got it. You know what? I almost did, but I... You fumbled on the funniest part of the end. That was amazing. Perfect. Automobile wheel, that's great. Well, hot dogs to all who celebrate.

Oh, Hi. Hey, Rick, too, three, four, hey, rid, don't know. Hey, rid, don't spider. If you like that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. We go into the scene suggestion channel in the Discord and take your scene suggestions. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com slash hey riddle riddle by joining the clue for $5 a month or start your seven-day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month and you get those ad-free episodes. See you there.

That was a hate gum podcast.