Hey Riddle Riddle - #66: On The Ground, In Disguise

Episode Date: October 23, 2019

Well, we're off to the races with the return of our good friend Padraic Connelly's Anagram Riddles! By far the best riddles we get on the show and we completely ruin them with our usual BS! Take a detour into the world of Dr. Seuss, aging backwards, the prison-industrial complex, and our pitch to Sesame Street for a new character. And, as always, a review of popular chain restaurants! If there’s an anagram in this description, we’d never know! #WiddleWednesdayStarring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifEditing by: Casey ToneyTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The doctor was the mother. He stood on a block of ice. It was the typical fish. It was the cat and of an airplane. It's happened with the hospital. And the horse didn't run it. I'm a real man. Listen up, Riddles. This is Bosley, and you're Riddles Angels. Thank you, Charlie. I said Bosley. You have a lot of fun.

Bosley is a hair growth fig for men. Bosley is a hair growth for men. Or, or a basil. Dogs. Or dogs. My dog wears a toupee. Famously. Where?

Where? Because dogs are covered in hair, though. Dogs are covered in hair everywhere, but they're butts are like baboons in that way. And I'm a JPC. Can we say our names yet? I'm Aaron Poppins. Okay, thank you. Aaron Poppins? That's fun. We say our names yet. I'm Aaron, I'm, oh, I'm Aaron Poppins. Okay, thank. Aaron Poppins?

That's fun. That could be your character. I'm Adore Fie. And I'm Aaron Poppins. And we are all on iOSka. Did Bosley say listen up, Angels? That feels aggressive. Fosley had a few catchphrases.

Number one, listen up, Angels. Number two, shut up women. Shut up, women. I fucking said listen up. Number three, shut up women. Number four. Hush, hush, little girl. I get 10 more times up number three. Shut up women. Number four. Hush, I get 10 more than times than you do.

10 more times. 10 more times. Not 10 times more. No, no, no, no, no. I get six pages a year, I get 30. I get paid equal amount. It's just divvied up because I don't know how, I don't budget well.

Not 10 times more, 10 more times. 10 more times, 10 more times. I get 36 pages a year, you be 26. That's, I just get, oh, that. Hush, hush, little girls. There's another case for you to do. I wish Tinder paid equality was as simple as men get paid 10 more times. We would have been two.

I could pay 10 more. I could pay 10. I could pay 10. I could pay 10 more times. Yeah, we do. I could pay two weeks on the month for a woman, for what a woman makes. Aaron, if you were a Charlie's Angel, what would be, because I think they each have their own skill set, right?

Yeah. Like, one is like on the ground in disguises, and one is like weapons, and one is like computer typing on the ground in disguises. On the ground in disguises. So not like, cuz trees are birds. If I just said in disguise, people would be like, oh, she's flying in dust guys. Mm-hmm.

So I have to clarify on the ground in disguise. In disguise. In disguise. That's also JetBlue's tagline. JetBlue on the ground in disguise. So what JetBlue does is they true and show you where they have you sit in the plane. They run painted cardboard past the windows to where it looks like you're flying. I'll say it. We gotta stop does is they true and show you where they have you sit in the plane they run Paint a cardboard pass the windows to where it looks like you're flying. We got us. Stop talking about the true Show this podcast never will never we gotta start talking about ed TV Aaron what would be my

I think I would be the one who knows the exact right mean thing to say Like the meanest thing you can say at any given moment. I would be like say this I was gonna say mine would be like, at times I'm passive aggressive, but then 90% of the time, I just get walked all over, and that's my power, is that? So you're on the ground.

I'm on the ground, getting walked all over in this guy's. Japs, what would be your... Uh, a webbing expert. That makes sense for you. Let's do a quick detour into James Weapons' corner. No, not a detour. I have it, no, the tours, it's the last time. I was dive.

Indeed. Indeed, a detour. Oh, this is my Weapons expert corner. Okay. So describe this gun in front of you. Okay, so this is chewing gun. This is chewing gun. This is the only gun that you can blow bubbles.

Pazuka? Like a Pazuka bubble gun? Erid, very good. Hello. Great eye. I brought my brain. Great eye, yes. So this is a Pazuka.

And it shoots in short cinnamon bursts. Yep. I'm sorry, cinnamon bursts. Pazita bursts. Eridem is like to give me another weapon. Mm-hmm. This one? Whoa, I'm so expecting there! Uh-huh!

Okay, I just did bazooka bubble gum. I can't swallow this. Sure, this is a tire iron. Um, you uh... Tired iron? Yes, you... So this is an iron that's been unplugged. It's no longer hot and it has been ironing up there. You guys know these? All right, how about this weapon? Uh-huh, this is a bow and arrow. This is a bow and bow and arrow.

This shoots bow and constrictor snakes. And so you, and let me hand you this, this is a Kit Katana. Okay, great. So this is actually four Katanas and as you break them off, they go down in size from a Wakazafu to a tonto. It's just a big ol' rock. This is Dwayne the Rock Johnson, this is a star of some stillman's screen. He's one of the highest paid actors in the entire world.

And can you show us some of the, because famously you do twix boxing. Yes. Can you show us some of the moves in twix boxing, like what makes twix boxing? Yes, actually what I do is be Twix Boxing. So it's boxing in between matches. We'll do my thing. So no, that's not the game that we're playing. I do a bit Twix Boxing. So after a boxing round where they go to their quarters, I sneak up a hide and punch up a

surface. I can't have the head. Then they have to go back and do more boxing. And here's a knife. That's not a knife. That's a spoon. Simpsons. And see And here's a knife. That's not a knife, that's a spoon, citizens. And see, that's a knife, this is a knife. So that was JPC's weapons corner,

which is a great segue, because we're actually gonna be talking about me a lot this episode. Oh, you're in your own segue. Yes, that you see that little thing outside in the parking lot. That kid? Hey, kid, get off my segue.

Sorry, thank you, good eye. No, I was talking about the segway. That's mine, that's why I'm riding around town. You're moving fast today, both of you. I don't know if I can keep up. I'm out of breath, 20, 10 times behind you. No, whoo, can't, can't keep up. We're all sitting down talking to my crew, but.

Let's just say before this episode, Jace and I were in the bathroom pattering our noses. Mm-hmm. We both were drunk. We're drunk. Well he potted our coat, that's a getting drug. Let's just say before this episode, Jace and I were in the bathroom hattering our noses. Mm-hmm. But we both were drunk. We're drunk. Well, you've had a no, that's a getting drunk.

We're both wearing a lot of foundation and mascara and heavy makeup. And we do not leave the house without heavy makeup. We're on the ground in this guy's. Yeah, we're on the ground in this guy's. So we're talking about you a lot this episode? We are going to be talking about me a lot because I'm going to be playing OMP.

The old man puzzles himself. It's back in action. JPC, you're old boy, you're old friend, you're old boy friend. Chiboy. It's Chiboy. It's the X-boyfriend JPC. When did we date? It went to do an anal date.

2007 to 2009, 2009 to 2007. I watched that movie with a... Benjamin Button. Benjamin Button dated you. There was no answer to that that I, I, what's that movie with the, Benjamin Button. Benjamin Button. Benjamin Button dated you. There was no answer to that that I wouldn't have accepted. And tell them, tell them why we broke up. Turned into a baby. I turned into a baby.

Mm-hmm. I've actually never seen that movie. Has anyone ever seen that movie? Of course. You have? Of course. Big hit. It was a cultural touchstone, but I felt like it wasn't something that you had to see I've never seen that movie. Has anyone ever seen that movie? Of course. You have? Of course. They hit.

It was a huge hit. It was a cultural touchstone, but I felt like it wasn't something that you had to see because you got it from just touchdown. How old were you when that movie came out? I thought you'd touch it out. Let's figure that out. Okay, that movie came out in 2011. In that you were an anarchist and you just didn't think anything was important in pop culture.

I just was not... I don't think I was interested in the subject matter or Brad Pitt's career. What did they get on Rotten Tomatoes? Wanna guess? Yeah, 87. That's probably a really good guess. I got a bushel.

Yeah, I would have guessed 87. I would guess in the B plus ring. I guess 74. Really? Uh, yeah, I don't know. I got a B, it had to have gotten a B. I just don't think it got above 90 because I don't think that it it was by the way it was 2008 and it got a 71.

What did I say? I don't know. 74. Great. I just fucking gradually did it. We all went over though. So set, yeah, 71. I wasn't interested in seeing in 2008.

I wasn't interested in seeing 71s at the time. Mm-hmm. I was only interested in those 90 plus maybe and dating tens Yeah, dating tens and blowing to You dated the 10 men, right? Yeah, I dated the 10 mil Dorothy's old friend the 10 man Yeah, and let me tell you fucking coward Really broke up with the VVTex cowing okay, how about that lion? Oh Yeah, yeah Look up with BBX, Cowan. Okay, how about that lion? Oh, you go see, you get me brain. You get me brain?

Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. But doesn't it get nominated for Oscars and stuff? Probably, for a fake hair. I think for digital effects, but not for like great content. Oh, I bet Kate Blanche had gotten nominated for something for that. How much time in that movie is he a baby?

Is he a little baby? 80%? No. No, I'm just kidding, of course not. Do you mean when he's like he a little baby? Baby, percent? No. No, I'm just kidding, of course not. Do you mean when he's like born an old man? Yeah, I don't know. I'd say the last five minutes or something.

I just don't. Yeah, so I don't think that that part is interesting to me. And it's a true story. It's just like, uh, meat joe black. Meat joe black. Meat joe black. Meat joe black. It's just like meat joe black.

Thank you. Thank you for your good knowledge. Me screaming, me, Joe Black. Yeah. Well anyway, I don't want to talk about that fucking movie nobody watched it didn't win any Oscars. We're going to get into it. It was bad.

I got something very special in store for you. Do you two remember our mutual friend, Pat Connolly? Yeah. Our world news cast mate, friend of the show, friend of a friend. We did riddles from him a few months ago. Now, Aaron, I'm glad that you brought that up. Yes, man. Yeah, different to me.

Pat? You got a pat here. Panty Newman. Yeah, you guys different to me. It sort of sounds like Randy Newman after he got his wisdom teeth out. It's my notes. Don't you dare make it be like this forever, mom? Yeah, so Pat sent in some riddles to the show in his special Patrick Connolly style.

And then he sent some more in. Yay. And when I can do this, we're going to do this from the blue book that we all fucking hate. That's all the bad riddles in it. Oh! Yeah. All the car values? Yeah, it's good.

We're gonna do it from a Kelly blue book. All right, your first riddle, 1997 Centra. Oh, I gotta say. Nissan Centra. $3,700? You think price is great. Yeah, and that's a good price for us. So what we said is said blue big money. No, so we have another segment.

And we are going to call this segment, Grandpa at Myers Lads. Oh, okay, now I remember remembering them. So couched within Grandpa remembers Lads. No, Myers, Grandpa at Myers Lads. Well, that's, I don't want it. Because they're pads, antigram riddles, and that's an antigram for pads, antigram riddles.

I don't want to hear that phrase again. Well, hey, padfuckin' rhoda, that'd be, you want to sit in him e-nails, don't sit in the little JPC. Hold on, I guess to be fair, lads does not, in my head lads is like kids, but lads could be, in the, they could be a ladder. Yes, well, it could be 40 ships.

It could be a gentleman of a certain age. Versus like in my head, I was like kids, but... An admiration does not necessarily have anything nefarious to it. You would admire... The way I admire those. A trophy horse. That's nefarious. There's nothing sexual about the way I look at a horse.

Nefarious. That would be a really good name for a horse. Nefarious. Nefarious. Itious is pulling ahead. And now he's won. I thought other people would jump on that and maybe finish that. It comes with Ferious. And he wins.

Why mustash? And he's whirling mustash. Oh, it's whirling mustash comes in a close second place. And second place comes in third. Fourth place is beat Joe Black, M-E-A-T. And here comes the fifth element. And the sixth man. Sixth sense comes in last. And the seventh samurai.

Followed by... Followed by it is enough. That jockey just drank it. Ava vodka he saw upset eighth place. Oh, here comes 11 from Stranger Things. Jesus on the track. Jesus stars. He does what the fuck she wants.

Followed by 12th night in 13th assassin. Oh, there's 12 angry men following right behind them That's the name of the 14th place. Oh, and one man. One man doesn't have his classes 27 dresses You know racing Hey, can we please do some of these puddles? Yeah, let's do some puddles. Okay, so these are from a good friend pad. You're right, me, the four paddels. So they're paddles.

So I was when I was saying Grandpa Mars Lads because they're anagram riddles. So inside of the riddle, it's all the same as last time. It pads us the anagram. The Misa anagram walker. Sky walker. You sure?

Anagrams walker. That's ruined a couple of people's careers. You sure? But you'd get a cool documentary made about you. The answer is hidden as an anagram somewhere in the riddle. And if you need an extra clue, just ask for the titles which are hints in love themselves. Poison. Poison. Start.

Oh, and Pad has plugs, but of course, I'll put the plugs up. He wears them well. He wears them well. You can't tell, he wears them plugs, but of course I'll put the plugs up. He wears them well. He wears them well. You can't tell. He wears them well. Bossly. Bossly hair for dogs hair plugs for dogs hair your head. Plades of the air. Bossly. What is this show? You're going to like the way you dog. We get it. Wolf it. I'm not. I want to go home.

I'm not part of this. I'm not part of this. Pad also lists and plugs. Uh, we'll try to get to them if we have time. Sure. I can't, I can't imagine that we're going to get to this. I can't, I can't right now. I can't, right, I can't right now. Uh, do you guys get this at all?

I literally can't even. I can't even. I can't even, Aaron. I can't even. Thoughts. I can't even. Okay. Okay.

Only odd. This is a warm up and a walk on. We need a break from all these riddles and puzzles. I know what this show needs. Come in, purves. Come in purves. So it's a couple words or anagrams, not all of them. Yes.

We need a walk on, come in purves. And I did say the title of it is time for a warm up and a walk on. I, his warm up has a title which confused me, but so that is the title of this warm up. And it's also I guess kind of a, a clue. Based on context clues, I want to say Brent lions, but I don't think he would do that. What word in here is an integrable bread? Purve. It was a more of a one to one.

Yeah. Yeah. It's a, it's a fundamental misunder more of a one to one. – Yeah, yeah. It's a fundamental misunderstood of what an anagram is, but it works. So remember, some of the words in here are anagrams for the answer to this riddle. – Great. – We need a break from all these riddles and puzzles.

I know what this show needs. Come in, purves. – Come in, purves. – Merv. Yes. Griffin. Merv Griffin. But remember, come in, pervs is an anagram to the answer to the riddle that I just read. Improv. Improv. Improv. Improv.

No. I should write this down. There's no these. Improv. Scene. Improv. Scene. I want to see a scene. I want to see a's no these in Props scene. Improv scene. I wanna see a scene. I wanna see a scene. Come in, pervs. I saw a scene today. I like to see a scene.

Of J.P.T. playing a doggy. I like the, the, the come in pervs also sounds like a classic setup line to like the, all right, get into my office. Yeah. It sounds like a Chevy Chase movie from like the 80s. Come in pervs. Yeah. Come in pervsves. Coming next November.

Coming perves. Well, the way you sound it sounds better. Coming to a Perv near you. We mean theater. Coming on a Perv near you. Paneron and an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an an a drums drums drums drums the drums drums. Okay, you ready for the first actual riddle here? Yes. Got it.

I'm not gonna make you guys do scenes where you are pervs because that's every scene that you would do, you all are pervs. Here's your riddle. These aren't on the menu as the catch of the day, but they're brought by the waiter if you don't wanna pay. These aren't the pieces of a tall jenga tower, but knock it over on purpose and they'll turn

game's sour. They might help a lawyer trying to get off his guy and you're certain to find them if you're caught in a lie. Okay, I may help a lawyer get off his guy and I'm not going to touch that one. Yeah, with a tin-foot-pull. You're a mean one. I got the last one from the business of that. You're a meme, but Mr. Grinch. You missed them? I missed, I just missed them.

I'm just home to the pool. You want to see them again? They've grown, they've appeared now. So the last two sentences are, they might help a lawyer trying to get off his guy and you're certain to find them if you're caught in a lie. I want to see a scene. JPC, you are going to be the Grinch.

Okay. Aaron, you're going to be Cindy Luhu. I might pop in as Tony the Tiger. Sure. Narrating. And this is like five years after the movie. And this is like a fifth Christmas together. Gotcha.

Mr. Grinch. Please call me Ned. Gotcha. Mr. Grinch? Please. Call me Ned. Cindy, we're married. The Grinch had a new name. OK. We're married. But Mr. Grinch.

Because in the original, you were, let's say you were 16. I was 16. Teen. No, just a child like this. You can't let Racken make this right. Um, Mr. Grinch. Okay, well, 16 years has passed. You're arrested.

No, Mr. Grinch. No, you're 22. You're arrest. I'm a fastly boy. How old's the Grinch though? Six. Timeless. Yeah, but also, like, he could just be young.

So I'm 22. Sure. Mr. Grinch? And I'm 22. Sure. Mr. Grinch. And I'm 31. Okay, Mr. Grinch, so it's not great. But not bad. Mr. Grinch. Have your age plus four.

Plus seven. Seven? It's got to be, sorry. Mr. Grinch. Yeah. Do you, do you believe in the Christmas spirit? What do you mean, like ghosts? No, not like Christmas Carol's spirits. I just mean like the spirit of Christmas.

I've always believed in it, but for this year it's really hard for me to have Christmas cheer. Wait, why? Why is it hard for you to have Christmas cheer? You're the cheeriest person I know, it's what I love about you. Well, sometimes the who's down in whoville, I've been seeing the Lorax. Huh? Into the Lorax? Well, I don't want to get anyone in trouble, but it's true when she says, I've been giving her my Lorax bubble.

He's not done. I...finger and lick. And... Finger and lick. And prod and I pride. And I do my little mustache all over her thigh. I... Squared but I squabbed. And I quibbed I quambed. Hahahaha.

Seen. I quim and I quim. Doctors who's words really do sound kind of disgusting. Quim come pro. Skibble d dabs. It's poopity bobs. It's a slobby bobs. I hated that I did that.

It'd be dabs. It's poopity hoops. Yeah, doctors use enrolled doll both took the same drugs. Mm-hmm. It's not just snows bearers. It smells like a snows bearer. I'll have what they're having. I'll have them.

They're having the cum sandwich. Sorry, quam sandwich. Quam sandwich. River's quama. Unfortunately, after the best greatest scene of all time, Cindy Luhu married to the grid, cheating on the grid to the Lorax. I don't remember the full thing, and I need to hear it.

Okay, so here's the riddle one more time. These aren't on the menu as the catch of the day, but they're brought by their waiter if you don't want to pay. These aren't the pieces of a tall jingotower, but knock it over on purpose in a little turn game's sour. They might help a lawyer trying to get off his guy, and you're certain to find them if you're caught in a lie. Remember, I can give you the title of the riddle as a hint. I can also give you the word or words inside the riddle that is the anagram for the answer. Can I ask, can you tell me yes or no?

Yes. Is turn game sour? Yes. Yes and no, because one of those words is extra. How about game sour? No, one of those words turn game. Turn game. Turn games.

Turn games. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Jenga Tower? What is the question? You said Jenga tower. Jenga tower? No, Matt, do you want to play? It's right, there's Jenga tower in front of me. I would love to knock it over.

I'd love to knock it over and act like I didn't mean to. Al, is it how? Turn games is the anagram. Tame gasterns. That's the turn games is the anagram that's he's looking for. Is Nest. Tag. Tag run. Tag games is the Anaconda. Oh, okay. Is Nest. Tag. Tag Run.

Tag Run. Tag Runs in there. Yeah, Tag Run is in there. Tag Runs. Tag Run is. Tag Run. It's in there, but does it answer the riddle? What was the riddle?

This is all improv-themed. No. Tag Run is not the answer. I know, but I was wondering. I don't think so. What is the question? What is the question? What is the title, rather? Oh, you want the title? I'll do you want was wondering. I don't know. What is the question? What is the question? What is the title, rather?

Oh, you want the title? Adel, do you want the title? Yeah. The title is, I disagree with this riddle. Rittle court? Rittle court. No, the answer's not riddle court. I disagree with this riddle.

It's just a hint. But it's the answer to the three prompts in the riddle, but they're brought by the waiter if you don't want to pay, but knock it over on purpose, they'll turn game sour, and you're certain to find them if you're caught and alive. I will say that it's one word that you're looking for. One word. It's two words turned into one,

but it's one word that you're looking for. And this is, is it Dermstrang? Strang. No, how's the Victor Cremson? Nope, it's not word that you're looking for. And this is, is it Dermstrain? Strain. The house that Victor Cremonson. Nope, it's not Dermstrain. Eh. Eh, Aaron. In school, it's not a house to full magic school.

Addle. And it's a house. Heh. Addle, Addle, don't joke about Harry Potter, don't. Hey, little dumbass, that school that you go to, that's a house. That's a house. Your home school. What? Um, tag. school that you go to? That's a house. That's a house. You're a home school.

What? Tag. No, my mom said I go to a school. It's one word, Aaron. I know I'm trying to find one with ST, ST. Maybe it would help less, if you focused less on what the word is from spelling it from that word and more on just what an answer to those three prompts would be. Addle, do you have any guesses?

Does it start with M? No. Does that mean S? Does it disregard the advice that I just keep? Yeah. I always say advice you just said. Listening to the, like actually, I didn't answer it. Try and solve it from the riddle.

So this is what happens. This is what they bring you when you don't want to pay your bill. They're brought by the waiter if you don't want to pay your bill. Okay, let's stop for a minute. They're brought by the waiter if you don't want to pay the bill. That would be breadsticks because those are never ending. Water. You don't have to pay for weight. If you, uh, these aren't pieces of a tall jingotower, but

knock it over on purpose, and they'll, they will turn game sour. Um, patch kids. Uh, what turns game sours and it's also cheating would be what would what would what would happen if you caught someone cheating? What would that what would that start a war or civil war? Yeah, that's how the civil war started. Two brothers brother against brother cousin, a game of a jenga, a jenga tower. Um, okay, cheating. Yeah, so you caught someone cheating and now when cheating and now you divorce them So you caught someone cheating and now what's happening and now you do or some fights. Yeah, you fight. So now we're just on sinning rumble. We're in temper tantrum fight fights. All right, let's say let's say fight, but let's take the physical aspect out of it. Punch argument. Nice. Aaron got it. It's arguments. It's arguments is the answer.

Uh, Pat must have been nice to be on jeopardy. Okay. The guy was on fucking jeopardy. Yes, this guy was a fucking jeopardy Wait, these are hard when we say he was on jeopardy what jeopardy is that drug you snort with your nose, right? Yeah, so he was on jeopardy makes you all good at trivia. Yeah, but bad at driving a car You ended up in a lake. He's through he threw his trebec out Nice, he was driving his trebec a trebec a that's a He ended up in a lake. He threw his Trebekah. Nice. He was driving his Trebekah. That's a... He was driving in Trebekah.

He was driving a super Trebekah in Trebekah. Take Indy Kulagra. Something about daily double. Something daily double. Something daily double. Yeah. Give us 10 minutes. Give us one podcast and we're going to get you the answer to that.

Are you ready for Pad's second riddle? Yes. Yes. And Pad says, Pad specifically wrote here, I bet that last one was hard. You has a riddle started? No, no, no. But I'm reading it in the poem that he wrote it.

I bet that last one was hard. You dumb mother fuckers. What? JPC is so smart and y'all are just suckers. Is he, are you the lawx? He's fucking suck. Yeah, I know, there's more too. Should I keep him with this guy every week?

Should I keep reading what pad wrote? Yeah. JPC's the king, the king of the podcast. Really feels like you're just making this. All of you rats can go eat. My ass? My ass. Yeah, that's not a great word for pad,

but I know, those were, of course, were written by Eddie Pignac. Yeah. Another guy out of world news. No, this is, it pads next, Rital. For bad, but I know those were, those were of course were written by Eddie Pina. Another guy on World News. No, this is, it pads next, Rettle. I'm not going to give you the title. I greet everyone as equals, every child, lady or fellow. I'll do the job no matter where, in a convent or a bordello. I might proceed a warm embrace or an angry threatening word, but of course you will find neither if my voice was left unheard. No need to raise your fist to me.

If my purpose you derive, I only want to sing your praise from the moment you arrive. Okay. Okay, what to do with that? So I will say it's right there. Just give me an answer. First impression, what's your answer? I gotta be honest. Call me a library book because I checked out.

Call me a library book because I'm overdue. Aaron, I'd call you a library book because you're fine. Call me a library book because I have hair and blood and it's not from all sorts of people before you even met me. Call me a library book because I have hair and blood and it's not from all sorts of people before you even met me. Call me a library book because I'm covered in tiny bugs that you can't see with your eyes. And that's true. We are doing that. That is true. Yeah, we're full of bugs. Call me a library book. I haven't been touched in 12 years since you mentioned the internet. Call me a library book. You can check me out, but you have to be very quiet.

Is this the show now? Yeah, I think so. Um, could you read it again? Yes. I greet everyone as equals every child, letter, or fellow. I'll do the job no matter where in a convent or a bordello. I might proceed a warm embrace or an angry, threatening word, but of course you will find neither if my voice was left unheard.

No need to raise your fists to me if my purpose you derive, I only want to sing your praise from the moment you arrive. Okay, at the end there kind of launches into the Lion King song. From this moment you arrive on this planet. From the moment you arrive, Adel, you have chewed into what I think is the most telling aspect of this riddle. From the moment you arrive at all you've chewed into what I think is the most telling aspect of this riddle from the moment you arrive breath Baby, oh breath baby When your room looks kind of weird and you were sick you were there

Keep going just grab a book and check it out Where you're underwear breath breath breath breath breath baby, breath. Babies, babies, babies. So boy, he's making direct eye contact with me. Why am I in charge? Anyone under 32 is like, what's this song? Ha, ha, ha. Like Aaron. NGPC.

You never watch Muppet Babies? I didn't trash. I watched Muppet Babies, but I don't remember that. I didn't watch Muppet Babies or the Muppets or Sesame Street or any of that stuff. Boof. That's why you don't have a soul. I was too busy doing math on my calculator.

Do you know what song just popped into my head? You might be too old for this. Remember Arthur, the art version? I do remember Arthur. The library song? Nope. Having fun isn't hard when you've got a library card. No one?

I'm really not making that up. It's so sad. I remember what Arthur. Why is it because you can go inside the library. It's so sad. I'm like, I'm making that up. Why is it because you can go inside the library when it's hot outside and just kind of hang out in there? Yeah, you also read books. What? You're going adventures.

She nerd. She nerd. She nerd killer with fire. Killer baby, when she reads, she reads. Killer with fire, see if she floats. You guys are getting into a very fun conversation and you're getting farther and farther away from the answer to this riddle.

Okay. And I want to see you become better friends. You said from the moment we arrive on this planet. From the moment you arrive, it's like, is it, is it, is it, to me, a very talented part of it? Um, shot clock. The moment you arrive climax. Do you guys want me to tell you, oh, okay, all right.

A rival, uh, Amy Adams. Can you guess the, the word in here that is the integram? Ladies and gents, what was it? Uh, no, ladies and gents, uh, I Adams. Can you guess the word in here that is the integram? Ladies and gents, what was it? No, ladies and gents, I greet you as equals every you just child, lady or fellow. I'll do the job no matter where in a continent or Bordello. Bordello seems like a out of place.

Okay, your correct, Bordello is the word that is out of place and that is the integram word. Just the one word? Just the one word. B is out of place. And that is the anagram word. Just the one word, just the one word. For Dello. Hello. Hello. So where's the H and Bordello?

I don't know. How do you spell Bordello? H-R. No. G-O-G-O-L. It's B-O-R-D-E-L-L-O. U-R-D-E-L-O. Uh, yeah.

Orlando. It's Orlando. Orlando. I wish it was Orlando. Delaware.L.A.L.A. Yeah, Orlando. It's the Orlando. I wish it was Orlando. Delaware. No, no, no, no. Doorbell. Yeah, doorbell. Yeah, doorbell.

We're proud of you. We is the collective. I'm proud of you. Hello, my name is Elder Christ. The Elder Christ. The title of this was also this one should ring true. And I want to see you see, Adel, you are going to be playing a kind of a door-to-door missionary.

Aaron, you are going to be answering your door, but it's going to be for a new religion that we haven't really heard anything about. Ding Dong. You can just ring the doorbell. Ding Dong. Ding Dong. Oh, here go. Hi. A sing my little song.

Hi. Uh, hello. How are you? Agree to sing upon you. My name is Mark. My last name you can't know. Because the Lord is watching all below. I actually am good on vacuums. I'm a Cloudboy. What?

Cloudboy. It's a religion based off final fantasy. I'm sorry I'm not familiar with a final fantasy. I really don't want to mom. What's going on here? Sorry, honey. Go back. I say you was ahead of religion based on final fantasy. You know final fantasy, son? Yeah, I know a lot actually. I heard it say cloud and Sephiroth. Oh, you're a ripe little potato. Uh-huh. Okay, honey Stan behind you. How old were you? How old was I? Yes I heard it say cloud and Sephora. You're a ripe little potato. Uh-huh. Okay. Honey Stan behind.

How old were you? How old was I? Yes. Five years ago when the Grinch came back. We're always getting older. That's one of the first laws of being a cloud boy. You're 17. That's just being a person.

Well in my religion, anyone under 18 is a liar. So if anything happens, we know that he's still like a lot. Okay. That's fair. Do you want to ask me about the religion at all? Yeah, sure. If you become a Cloudboy. It is based on Final Fantasy. It is based on the teachings of Final Fantasy. What is Final Fantasy? Final Fantasy is a square enix game. It has produced many, many use-eggles. There's 30 at least.

And it's a- You're repeating his half-year plan. Mm-hmm. And I'm sweating and it's running. It's a tactics game. It's real fun. No. Seven's the best one.

That's what people say. Yeah, that's the two characters you mentioned before. That's the bad one. Uh-huh. And I'm a Cloudboy. Honey, does any of this check out? Barely. But just enough that I can't stop him.

And in a new ones, there's cars. Huh. So basically, it's saying that life's a game. Life's a game. Everyone's the same. We're a character in a game. And you have multiple lives. You can select start stop, up, down, up, down,

left, right, a, b, a, b. We actually already have a religion. Honey, do you want to tell him what we are? So you don't want infinite lines? We're in Nintendo Terrians. You're in Nintendo Terrians. Oh, I didn't even, you're wearing the power gloves. Yeah, these are the power gloves. We're actually just about to sit down to Donkey Kong. Oh, okay. Oh, I'm sorry, you have a Donkey Kong. So you're going to hit that? It's true. Yeah, we only hit mushrooms. We only eat mushrooms,

and we throw turtles at people, you know. Okay, yeah. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We only hit mushrooms. We only hit mushrooms.

We throw turtles at people, you know. Okay, yeah. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit it. We're gonna hit If you wanna come in and grab a joystick, switch around, you're more than welcome to. The Ninja Terrians are very old. I prefer not, yeah. If I'm gonna play it should be in my station wagon. Oh, you're not. Sega. No.

Okay, good. Sega religious. Sega religious. Oh man, I love those Sonic games. Ah, you guys. Yeah. You guys are two riddles down. And you know what that means?

Time for a break. You deserve a break. You deserve one. So, I want you to go out there. I want you to practice your anagrams. I'm gonna get you. I bought you a bra, I bought you a bra. I bought you sabaros, I bought you all pizones.

A Mario Kart. We're gonna play sabario kart. And we're gonna hear a break. Are we gonna hear a message from some of our sponsors. Hey, GPC. Uh, uh, yeah? You're not in trouble. I just need help.

I'm, um, pranking Addle. And I'm setting up a website to prank him. Um, can I just need some advice? This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. I'm not up a whole website to print them. Okay. I just need some advice. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. I'm not mad at you. We're pranking app. Squarespace is the only one website platform for entrepreneurs to stay in doubt and to see it online.

Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website. It gays with your audience and so anything for products to cut into time All in one place all on your terms Hey, I don't come here come here. Hey, what's what's going on? I actually I want to prank GPC and I want to set up a whole website to prank him Do you have anything that like is there like an online store like could set up on my website to sell product? Did you know that with Squarespace you can have custom merch. You can easily sell custom merchant-crate passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand,

design your products and production, and inventory and shipping are handled for you saving you time and money. What is happening? Okay. Wait, what's going on with Adel? Oh, nothing. Nothing. I'm just setting up on with that all? Oh, nothing, nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal Squarespace website, not a prank thing, new, and he's gonna tune you. And I'm gonna use analytics. Use insights to grow my business and learn

where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool. I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my prank website, the prank activity. Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace.

Did you say what the website was for? I can't remember what the website is for. Yeah, the website is for. Prank. With Squarespace. Yeah, with Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Venet third party tools to extend the functionality of your website.

Hey, JPC, hey, JPC. What's up, battle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, Madel? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine. Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back, she's back.

Hey Aaron. Hey Aaron. Can we go to grandma's house? Wait, I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey, Adeland JPC.

Thank you for meeting me in the middle of the woods here. I am sort of at an empath. I can't decide whether or not to go this way or this way. I'm having a hard time choosing a path. You know, there never truly is a middle of the woods. Isn't it funny to think about something like that? There never truly is a middle of the woods. No, this is the middle.

Okay, this is it. Addle, can you help? Yeah, actually. So as per Robert Frost, I don't know if you know his poems. He has a poem called Better Help. I believe this is written in the 1800s, but it still stands true today more than ever. Aaron, you should try Better Help. Have you heard of this?

You seen this? Mm-hmm. Because sometimes Aaron and life were faced with tough choices and the path forward isn't always clear. Whether you're dealing with decisions around career relationships, being stuck in the middle of the woods, therapy helps you stay connected to what you al, al, al. Sorry, that also does so fast. Therapy helps you stay connected to what you really want while you navigate life and the woods. Mmm, and better help is entirely online, so it's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule.

I've been using it for several years, and it suits the way that my brain works way better than traditional therapy ever did. And when Aaron says traditional therapy, just so everyone's clear, what she means is tricking two of her friends to coming to the middle of the woods, even though there isn't truly the concept of the middle of the woods, isn't that fun to think about? All you have to do is just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapist at any time for no additional charge. Hey, Aaron, GPC's putting down bread crumbs and then immediately picking them up and eating them. Oh, dirty bread crumbs. Mmm.

Mmm. And he's also like really into that owl who's swooping down. Anyways, let there be your map with better help. Visit betterhelp.com slash riddle today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help h-e-l-p dot com slash riddle r-i-d-d l-e. R-i-d-d l-e the middle of riddles a d but there is no true middle of riddle because it would be the space in the middle of, you see, I hope you get home. Bye, baby. I am home. Who are we?

What is this? I clink, clink, clink. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, I just want to make a quick toast to, I know it's JPC's birthday, and we're all so excited to talk about him, but I want to talk about my favorite, my favorite thing in the world. And that is the app Rocket Bunny.

Oh, yeah, Aaron, that's one of my favorite things as well. Mm-hmm. Rocket Bunny is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills all in one place. I've been using it for years way before they were a sponsor and it helps me so much, especially around tax season. Kling, cling, cling, cling, cling. Sorry, I also want to give a toast. Rocket money, well quickly and easily find your subscriptions for you. And for any you don't want to pay for anymore, just hit cancel. And Rocket money will cancel it for you. It's that easy.

Kling, cling, cling. It also categorizes your expenses so you can easily track your budget in real time and also get alerted if anything looks off. Over three million, oh, clink, clink, clink. Over three million people have used rocket money, saving the average person up to $720 a year. We love rock. Stop clink clink. Stop. No, clink, clink, clink. Stop. Throwing your money away, cancel unwanted subscriptions today and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocketmoney.com slash riddle. That's rocketmoney.com slash riddle.

Rocketmoney.com slash riddle, and tell them JPC's birthday got ruined by two of his friends for doing speeches about rocket money the website My We're back from break you just heard an ad or maybe you did and Depending on if we sold one we may have not sold one we're back from break. I don't know how to rhyme Aaron Keith is broken Oh god, I hope we had an ad guys are you ready to do more of these pad Connelly style hurdles? No

Do you know what pad Connelly's an endocrine for bad? Connelly bad Connelly correct you guys are gonna be really good at these Bad, gahonally. Bad, gahonally, correct. You guys are gonna be really good at these. Dap? Dap. Lunally. Dap, lunally.

From a calm parent, it makes you act nicer. From a tense one, it makes you act terse. A fine uncle's will, I'm sorry. Go down the rice. A fine uncle's will help you be better. A rude aunts will make you much worse. A good teachers will make you much smarter. A bad tutors will make you fool.

For a war hawk, it's used as a weapon. For a diplomat, used as a tool. Missile. Missile. The answer is missile. So, I hate it. I hate it when my uncle brings the missiles to Thanksgiving. Yeah, I work at Raytheon and I have a missile.

I actually do have an uncle that works at Raytheon. What is Raytheon? That sounds like a, that sounds like a final fantasy character. Yeah. Do you think that, it could be. It's a weapons manufacturing company that is a, it makes the guy didn't systems for bombs, I believe. I was just in, oh no, I was in Kansas City never mind.

I was in Kansas City and I saw, I think it was Rolls Royce. Has there offices there? I was like, that doesn't make sense. Yeah, it's weird. But for me, I thought I was in the office. A guidance system for bombs, Adel, is that what you have installed in all of your jokes? Yes, so I have an internal system

that will only allow me to bomb. So when I say a joke, it immediately falls flat. Yeah. And I've killed so many rooms. But yeah, no, you have. In a bad way. Yeah, okay. I'm a comedian.

I'm a comedian. I kill every room that I'm in. I'm a comedian. I'm a comedian. I'm a comedian. I go up on stage and I commit. I'm a comedian. Okay. I have a comedian. I'm a comedian. I'm a comedian. I go up on stage and I commit. I'm a comedian. Okay. I have a comedian.

What's the title of this? Don't let me tell you how to answer. It's a title. Don't let me tell you how to answer. Don't let me tell you how to answer. Make it up. From a calm parent, it makes you act nicer. From a tense one, it makes you act turse. Let's stop for a minute. Let's unpack that. From a calm parent, it makes you act nicer. From a tent one, it makes you act turse. Let's stop for a minute. Let's unpack that. Okay. From a calm parent, it makes you act

nicer. Yep. So my mom's real chill and calm. So what would she do that would make me be nicer? And a conversely from a tent one, it makes you act turse. Turse. Freedom. Free time. Being alone. Let me keep going because you have to tie it to something else. We'll give you the ant and uncles. A fine uncles will help you be better. A rude ants will make you much worse. Um, birthday card check. Birthday card check.

Check. Confidence. No, but we're in the right direction. DNA. DNA. Reditary. A good teachers will make you much smarter. A bad tutors will make you a fool.

For a war hawk, it's used as a weapon. For a diplomat, used as a tool. Okay, for a war hawk. Claw! Trust. No, but you're a good base. Confidence, trust. You're in the ballpark, but in terms of like,

it's not like an item, it's not like, you know, cigarette, it's confidence, trust, it's that type of thing. It's an entangial. Something, okay. Something, something mutual. Something something mutual? Yeah, what's the little, what's the little word that's where? What do you, what do you, what do you just think the little war hawk?

I think War hawk. No, it's not War hawk. Yeah, War hawk, it seems like a fun word, but it's not Warhawk. It's actually something a lot more mundane. Speaking of Muppets, that's my least favorite Muppet. It's Warhawk. When the sirens would go off, and Warhawk would swoop in.

It's like Sam the Eagle. Sam the Eagle's younger brother. We're gonna take it over to the Warhawk here. My brother's dead. We're gonna teach you kids about a military complex. Are you? You know, our world financing Obama's wars, right? You're paying for Trump's wars out of your pocket.

You have blood on your hands, that's a big street. Don't spit on me when I come home. Okay, we're Huck. No, back to Fuzzy. Fuzzy's dead. Bucco, Huck. Oh, he's not at stage because he has a great comedian. Yeah, he only bombs.

No, I'd love. We're Huck is great, but he's not the answer to this riddle. So is it something, tutors, what was the... No, it's not a tutor part. What was right after tutors? It's not even those lines it's not teacher or tutor. It's somewhat the first four. First four words.

A couple. First four, uncle, a fine uncle's. So fine uncle's. Actually, just fine uncle. The apostrophe S does not look to be bold, and let me just confirm there is no S in the word. Fine uncle. One of my favorite bands of the 90s, fine young uncles.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Fine. There is no S in the word fine uncle one of my favorite bands of the 90s fine young uncles Fun Are we even fine yet fun icicle yes What a calm parent gives you a fun icicle Ikeopop That's what I got yeah Auto pop No, it's not an owl. It is an intangible, it is an intangible. Would you say Aaron? Life.

It's one word. Life. Lennon, Lennon, foreign, stolen, grad. Basically, what it works out to is if it's a good person, it makes you better, and if it's a bad person, it makes better. Friendship. Funnel. No. It doesn't give you an F, it does a- Friendship. Funnel, no.

No. It doesn't give you the nap. It does not begin with an L. It begins with an L. It does not begin with an L. It begins with an N. No, no. N is the second letter.

C. N is the second. Yeah, it's a C in the word. UN. Nope. UN. I am. Yes.

I am. Independence, in. You're so close. It's an in word. In-fin- In-fin- In-fun. In-fun. In-f. I am independence. Oh, you're so close. And it's an infinite, infinite, and in fun. In in inoculation. And so it's something that makes you better.

It's a good sell. A good in sell makes every man better. And I gotta, I'm when I'm in on the podcast, I am an in sell. I am involuntarily, involuntarily celebratory. In right. In in and got a and I got a involuntarily celebratory. In... In... In... In and got a...

In and I got a... In full... In... In... In... It's I and you. It's I in... F-I...

F-L... F-L... In... Hello... Influenced. Yes! Influenced! Influenced!

How sweet it is to get the rid all right. I want to see you sing. Yes, did all of yourself, too. I want to see you sing. What was the sentence pad wrote about something ant? A stern ant or a rude ant? A rude ant. Great.

I want to see you sing, James, you are playing someone and Aaron, you are a rude ant. Get in the car. Your mom couldn't pick you up from school, so I'm here. Uh, Aunt Martha, I haven't seen you in like seven years. Yep, that makes sense. Just move over some of my stuff in the car. You must, you better be actually sick. Oh, uh... I got three speeding tickets on the way to pick you up today. What? She's Aunt Martha. She's a bitch. What do you mean, like?

She's a raschly, raschly, dude. I'm not sick. Sorry. Man called me a bitch earlier and it put me in a fucking mood. Was it that cartoon tiger? It was. Just get in the car. You know, it can't be with the 200 yards of this school.

I know. I'm back. OK, yeah, I'm not sick, though. Oh, you're skipping. No, I'm going to a doctor's appointment. Oh, OK. Okay, yeah, I'm not sick though. Oh, you're skipping. No, I'm going to a doctor's appointment. Oh, okay, okay, okay. So everyone just can get out of school for anything these days.

What, no, I mean, I have to go to the doctor because if my pneumonia comes back, I could die. No, you have hearing. If you're pneumonia comes, you get a name. That's how you sound. Yeah, Martha, I haven't seen you in a long time. How was prison? Prism was fine, it was what it was.

Okay, I've just never met anyone. It was. It was. What it was? Okay, no, this is you. We cut the prison. You cut the prison. Hey, welcome to prison.

Hi. Thanks for coming to the bar, we're a new club. What can I get you to drink? I'm a prison. We have a lock up, then it's basically an old-fashioned. Hey, Jeff. Yeah? Confidence. What is Yeah? Confidence.

Confidence. No, push the confidence. Oh, we have a drink called the Con Fidence. Can I be honest with you? Um, I wish you would. I just broke out of prison and I haven't had a drink in six years. And your first stop was at a bar slash club called Prison? I had to reoclimate slow, so I thought I'm going to go to a bar called prison. I had to re-acclimate slow, so I thought I'm gonna go to a bar called prison.

No boys, no use looking for their jailbird would never go back to prison. Let's all go back to the police station and take a nap. Why is that officer screaming alone? I miss you, Diane! That's why you don't make pirates cops. So what was your name? Uh, Rude and? Rude and. You die in! That's why you don't make pirates cops. So what was your name? A rude ant?

Rude ant. No, sorry. Rude ant? Reading one of the names of your drink. Oh yes, that's called a rude ant. We also have a chive on the rocks. Call me a bitch. I don't think I want to.

Call me a bitch. No. A derrient. My derrient? I don't want to. Call me a bitch. No. I dare you. No. I don't want to. Did somebody take a bitch? I just... Hunch a boi!

Oh God! See, Trixboxing. I just love riding in the back seat. Trixboxing. Great job, guys. I think Adel's gotten two and I think Aaron's gotten one. And so we're right. This is not a contest by any stretch to the imagine.

We have this episode right where we want it. All right. This is not a contest by any search of the imagination. We have this episode right where we want it. All right, this is the next one. These are Underground riddles from Patrick Connelly for a divorce. I can think someone's starting the episode at minute 38. I think they are. Yep. A lot of people do. And we start riddles. I get a lot. I get a lot of tweets that say I started about 38 minutes. Actually, they say start running. You have 38 minutes. I just delete them every time.

I can stay right by your side while you work out on your bike or welcome you while you unwind after a calming hike. I'm a fan of certain sports and I'll support a crew. My family's half Canadian, but I'm American through and through. You can find me by Ohio, though I know we're near that state. I don't mean to brag to you, but most people think I'm great. Seth Rogan. Seth Rogan.

Aaron, it is not ocean. Water. Lake Michigan. It is Lake. Michigan. Is it? Yeah, that is the correct answer. Do you know which word in there was the

anagram for Lake Michigan or a series of words? Michigan, J-Frog, Lake, Kamal Lake. Mm. So just no, you could just say no. No. A calming hike. Mm. A calming hike is an anagram for Lake Michigan.

I sort of got a body of water. You did, you said ocean, that was the first thing that you guessed, which is great. And also, I wanna see you see. Well hold on. Can I say, can I finish? Can I finish? Can I finish? Pat has a fun bonus fact in here. He said, my families have Canadian, but I'm American through and through with an asterisk. Fun bonus fact of the five great lakes. Four of them are considered shared waters between the US and Canada. The fifth, Lake Michigan, is the only one that's completely within the US borders.

Also, I just noticed that an asterisk between a parentheses looks like a butthole. Oh, my proxologist, I had an asterisk. He put an asterisk instead of parentheses. Your ass is at risk. Well, I've also seen risk. I wanna see you seeing Aaron, you are the lead character

in this reboot of Ocean's 11, or Ocean's what is the most recent one? Ocean's eight, and this is, they wanna make another one, but they don't quite have the budget. So this is called Lakes Three. You are Danny Lake, and I'm sorry, Ricky Lake, and we are your two squad members. All right, gentlemen, take a seat.

There's no chairs on the floor. On the floor? Okay. We're gonna steal something of great value. I mean, all of your specific skills to do that. You, you're a weapons expert, right? Yes, I am a, I'm sorry, a little correction there. You're a whip at expert. I'm a wet buns expert

I are you familiar with are you familiar with the Kobayashi method for eating hot dogs very fast? No, well yeah dips the buns in water. So that's why what I bring to the table I didn't really you know about it. Well fuck that's why I was Especially was explain the buns and water see he can sweat what so the thing that Kobayashi discovered when he was eating hot dogs very fast was that the bun takes up a majority of the eating hot dogs. And it dries out your mouth. And it dries out your mouth. So he takes four buns, dips them in water, smooshes them together, and then eats that.

And it's much easier to eat the hot dogs fast. I heard you were talking. Why was he eating the hot dogs so fast? Oh, it's a hot dog. It's a hot dog eating contest. He has the world's record in it. No, No, he got fucking rocked by Joey Chess and that's starting around 2012. That's true, but Chess not that long.

You know so much trivia anyways. Chess, it's from Boston. You should know not that you're from Boston. Yeah, I'm not. I know. What's the area of it? I said not that you were. I said not that you were.

Okay. I'm also a wet buns expert. Okay, so I got two wet buns. I expert. But I'm a different type of wet bunse. What do you mean? No, I don't come on asses. What I do.

What I do is I make cinnamon rolls. Okay. That's my piece delivered. Is this don't? Also, I can't recommend coming on asses. Enough. If you haven't tried it. Well, to be fair, I do come on acid. Okay. So I take acid. And then I play coming on acid. Adolf, if you haven't tried it. No, well, to be fair, I do come on acid.

Okay. So I take acid and then I play come on island. That's what I call coming on acid. Sure, why not? Never had sex, I'm a virgin, I'm a revener, even masturbator. If there's too much of a cross over here, I'm also a wet bus expert. It's an improv team, improv team,

prolly Munkango. Yeah, he moves, so he's not really honored anymore. Who else is on that? Sean Coil, Ray Tasky, Haley Palmer, Harrison Lot. Holy shit, he did it. Is that the whole team? Yeah, okay, I got him. I got him all.

I was really scared. I missed somebody. I'm also a Fred Kuss expert, so I can play a guitar while just screaming expletive. I'm a Fred Klaus expert. I know every Vince Vaughn movie that is that movie, and I can say parts of it. And what else? And I'm a dead Claus expert. I know every Vince Vaughn movie that is that movie and I can say parts of it. And what else?

And I'm a dead Paws expert. If you cut off the paws of an animal and show them to me, I will be able to tell you what animal those came from. And what else? Speaking of what animal? I am a... He's a cop? I am a cop? I gotta say I have a cop. Speaking of cops, here's the next riddle. A story about somewhere, there's nothing about cops in here.

Oh, there is at the very end. A story about somewhere a friend of mine went, a place to find fair after coins had been spent. Animals watching, their eyes say that they know she shouldn't have ordered the chocolate volcano. She felt quite alarmed when right at the start, her only reward was a free sonic fart. The only sound heard from the bathroom's thin door, the audible noise of her feces faint roar.

Not a toilet was usable for the entire duration after a forensic investigation. And I will say there is four anagrams there. Damn. Um. Ooh, you really turned on the nitrous there. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Okay. Um, what does that start?

It begins with the first line, a story about somewhere a friend of mine went. Applebee's Ireland. So you're two things that you know about Pat as he goes to Applebee's in Ireland. He goes to Ireland. He goes to Applebee's in Ireland. But this is a friend of his. This is not his story. Well, it's probably one of us.

It's probably, right? I'm guessing it's one of us. So where did one of us go recently? Well, A, he wrote this email like seven months ago. Jesus. What's the title? A wild place to poop and eat. Wild place to poop and eat.

It's got, I mean, seven months ago I was in India. Is it like New Delhi? No. Chili's. No. Chili's too. I wish. Chili's. I wish this was a chili to pass to

I don't know if they have if a chocolate volcano isn't actually a menu item, but I get out of it It is no outback steak house. Is it is it a restaurant you it is a restaurant. Olive Garden Mm-hmm. I love gardens. Do you guys want to try to guess what any of the anagrams are in here? One does have a V in it? No, I think this game works better when I just shout out the answer and it's right. Sure. But when I start guessing it's bad. It's bad, yeah.

It slows it down. Can we never got the title of this one, right? A wild place to poop and eat. A wild place to poop. Buffalo Wild Wing. No. But in the wild poop. Buffalo poop, boys.

In the title, is there an antiviram? No. Okay. A wild place to poop and Buffalo poop, boys. In the title, is there an underground? No. Okay. Long place to poop and eat. Whole food. Safari. Safari. Rainforest Cafe. Rainforest Cafe.

No way. Bwam, bwam, bwam, bwam. Yeah, the four anagrams here are fair after coins, a free sonic fart, feces faint roar, and after a forensic. They're all fourth. those things are adegrees for Raid Forest Cafe. That's so much work. I've never one in East there again.

And, well, you never wanted to eat there to begin with. I've been there once in my life. I've been there for two separate work lunches. Are you serious? Yeah. When you worked at Raid Forest Cafe? No, no, no, no. I was like, let's go to Raid Forest Cafe.

We're at work, it's lunch. And famously, the Raid Forest Cafe is the, they're all on fire, right? I will tell you right now, it is dead at lunch, but guess what? Very expensive. That's great. And the food's just fine, I guess.

Sean used to have all of his birthday parties there for like 10 years. Where would, how would you rank part of all of his birthday parties? For 10 years, it was. He had them all in 10 years. How would you guys rank Hard Rock Cafe, Planet Hollywood and Rainforest Cafe? Do you know I used to collect Planet Hollywood shirts? No. Like from all in 10 years. How would you guys rank hard rock F.A. Planet Hollywood and Rainforest Goofy?

Do you know I used to collect planet Hollywood shirts? No. Like from all over the place. No, that's good. When I was a kid, people would give them to me. So I guess I collected them. This is the saddest thing ever. Sure, I still have to.

And that's what you call an Indianapolis hobby. I hate it, yeah, exactly. What's fucked up is I have planet Hollywood shirts. No, it's called an Indianapolis purpose. I got shirts with cities on them. And it had a run the world. And Indianapolis purpose feels like a dog's purpose, like the next chapter in a dog movie,

an Indianapolis purpose. Indianapolis feels like a name of a white trash dog. But we named the dog Indianapolis purpose. Indianapolis purpose is coming in at 18th place. When I was a kid, like 10 or 11, the style I guess was to wear like really back-y t-shirts. So all of the, um, uh, Planet Hollywood shirts that I got were like super back-y

and now as an adult, they like fit me like normal t-shirts. So fun. Yeah. Still have them. I still have a few of them. I don't keep stuff, I get rid of stuff a lot. So I maybe, I maybe don't have any anymore. Maybe I have one from Dublin, maybe. And sorry, you had been to these or people just gave you that?

But most, I went to a summer and I got some. I didn't get the one from Dublin, I didn't go to Dublin. Has Vicki traveled a lot? I'm not, a lot. She lived in South America for a while. That's right, there's something where I was like, your mom's been somewhere in the world. She's been everywhere, man.

South America, what I do. But she's been in those two places. Very cool. Yeah. Bogota, Colombia. I would rank it. Bogota. Hard rock cafe.

Hard rock cafe. Planet Hollywood. And then Rainforest Cafe. I would agree. I would concur. Hard rock's better. Yeah. Planet Hollywood, I don't remember the food being good.

And they're all closed, right? They're mostly closed. I used to come, the first time I came to Chicago was when I was like 12 or something because my dad lived up here for a little bit. And when my parents were divorced, I'd take the train up to Chicago and we'd always go to Michael Jordan's restaurant.

Yeah. That was the jam. So he'd be like, the space jam? Right out of the space jam. It was a space jam. So in like a one block radius would be rock and roll cafe, hard rock cafe,

rock and roll McDonald's, reinforced cafe and Michael Jordan's restaurant. I'm moving right there to where that in that square. That's awesome. Can I ask you a question? If we went to Michael Jordan's take us, could we play a game to see how many times we can get the waiter to say jam? Yep. And whoever wins has to whoever wins does that.

Are these preserves or jelly? Mm, and jelly. If you still have the seeds in, that would be course. Yes, a core. Yeah. Yeah. And another game, sort of unrelated,

can just someone take me to Red Lobster, please? Yeah, you've never been to Red Lobster. Hold on. Hold on. Stop the fucking podcast. I can't. I don't have any control of it. And don't actually, is Casey's not the podcast.

Oh, sorry. You can't stop it, people. No. All right just keep the stuff. Sorry, I'm getting stuck off of you. No! Oh, well the podcast is so... It's got dammit. We will do, we have to do an outing at a red lobster and I will bring... Should we do it for Costco? I'll buy it, yes.

And I'll buy like a little Zoom Pro or something and we'll record a podcast at a red lobster table. Oh my God, okay. We just just fully transitioned into doing the Doe Boys podcast. Yeah, we'll, no. We'll tell, we'll tell, we'll tell a red... tell, we'll tell, and of course my name is Mike Mitchell. We'll tell riddles about seafood at a red lobster.

Yeah, someone take, you can film the whole thing, but I want a full red lobster experience, and then we'll talk about it on the paper. Do you know what I have in my cabinet right now? What? I have the Chetarebe biscuits. Those are so fucking, Aaron, you don't even know what we're talking about.

They have a thing called Chetarebe biscuits. I know all the famous stuff like Cheteddar Bay Biscuits and Shrimp. But I- The two famous licks? But I really just want to have like a bunch of butter and I feel like that's the place to go to these. Here's one more thing. You gotta do with that butter, put it on this Cheddar Bay Biscuits.

Mmm. I don't eat butter anymore. I'm a country cook. I went out to the country with my wife, she fucked another farmer in front of me. Mmm. I got country cooks. Yep, Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. But let us know if you want to see a video of Adil taking me to Red Lobster and JPC being at his job. And we'll call that red lobster redemption. Oh, okay. Well, fine. I'm good. I'm good. Sood. By which point? By the movie redemption. By the Indonesian martial arts movie redemption.

Here's what I'll say, the three of us go to Red Lobster. I'll pay for it. What? Here's what I'll say. Three of us go to any Olive Garden in the city. I'll pay for half of the waiters. Troubles. Sorry for your troubles.

Sorry for your troubles. I'm so sorry we kept making you try and say jam. Does it make sense of Olive Garden? There's not a Red Lob lobster in Chicago, is there? Either shouldn't be. There's one right outside, probably Shomburgers, Skokie or Evanston. 100% were making this happen. I cannot wait to drive to a red lobster with all of you and recorded podcast there.

So for people who are listening, we might even do more because Pat gave us more riddles. So we might even do more of Pat's riddles at a red lobster. With a mouthful of lobster. You know, or we'll forget that this ever happened. Most likely that. Most likely that. Do you know the restaurant's motto or slogan?

No. Red lobster. Yum. Oh, I thought it'd win you're here, your lobster. When you're here? You see food. Red lobster. Pick which one you wanna die. I'd pick which one you're lobster. What are you here? You see food. You see food. Red lobster, pick which one you wanna die.

Pick which one you wanna die. I've not been to a lot of, not even to my 20s, I didn't go to like, cheesecake factory or P.F. Changs or a back steakhouse or any of those, I cannot, Cheesies was great. Yeah, we had Cheesies.

The Friday screen. I cannot stress enough how badly Aaron wants to be asked to be a guest on the Do-Boys podcast. Yeah, am I doing a good job? You are. You are. Nick, Wigger, we know you're listening. Yeah. Now I'd be too nervous.

Mike Mitchell, we know you're sleeping. Don't have me on your podcast, I'll blow it. Wow, what a great. Nick, when I did what's the, how this get played, Nick was like, if you guys ever want to come on Do-Boys, we should have you guys on. And I was like, yes, but I think he was just being nice. Yeah, well, you know what, it's nice

sending people a fucking email at all. Yeah, that's fair. Let's get a mini email, huh? Let's get a mini email. Let's get a mini email. Yeah, but tweeted us what shows you want to see us on. Yeah, we would do a bad job. That'll be a fun, weird game.

But only ones that you think we would not be great at. But don't tag the, don't tag the other show. Don't tag the other shows. But do put their name in there. Just to see if they're searching their names. Yeah, put their name in there. They have a good tag. Don't tag it.

Let's have fun. Let's have fun. Speaking of having fun, we've had a lot of fun with these riddles. We have more left over, so we'll do more soon. Do you guys have anything that you would like to plug? I want pad to plug first. Oh shit, yeah. Okay, so let's get to something that pads plugs. Now, he sent to plug? I want pad to plug first. Oh shit, yeah. Okay, so let's get to some of the pads plugs.

Now, he sent this email, I want to say months ago. Let's see if he's still doing any of these things. Let's see, he is going to be doing the eulogy for his, okay, no, that's one pass. Pat is the host of the Our Father podcast at our Father podcast on Twitter. Have you, Aaron, you've been on our father. I had the time of my life. Adela, have you been on our father podcast at our father podcast on Twitter. Have you ever had the time of my life? Have you been left so far?

Our father podcast? No. I have been asked and I have said no multiple times and I got to get on that podcast. He's also a writer for Let Sleeping Dogs Lie, the live comedy trivia game show and podcast at LSDL show on Twitter. And also he's on world news and he says, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. He's great on world news. And yeah, here's what I'll say as much as we were poking fun at the him through this, Pat is literally one of the nicest people you

ever know. Please come see world news. Enjoy him. He's brilliant and say hi to him afterwards. And say, and say, go walk up to him, say, we love you and keep writing more more on the grand people. People also email the show all the time because one episode Adel mentioned this email that he wrote about his trip to New Orleans and how he could share that with people and people email us being like, can we get those New Orleans recommendations? And I send them.

And Adel sends them, if you want Ireland recommendations, legit pad goes like, he's been going like once every, towards twice every year for 500 years. Yeah, for like an hour. These are the Lorax. But he will give you Ireland recommendations. like once every, towards twice every year for 500 years. Yeah, for like an hour. These are the Lorax. But he will give you Ireland, Ireland of Reconmissions. So right into our show and we will make pad,

recommend places in Ireland to you. He will give you Ireland reclamations. Had all anything to blug. I would like to plug a podcast I was on someone recently called Interparty Conflict. Check that out. I also want to give you a little doctor recommendations. Check out the show Undone on Amazon Prime.

It is so fucking awesome. It's really full of heart and depth, but it's weirdly funny, and it's beautiful. It's in that sort of rotoscope animation. I think Mariah's mom watched that. It is fantastic. Check that out Undone.

Also, I just bought a pair of all birds, which is a type of shoe. They're the most comfortable shoe I ever bought, so please buy some all birds. There's these sponsor podcasts, right? Yeah. Okay. All birds sponsor podcasts. I'm sure I think I've heard of the podcast before.

So if you're all birds and you hear this, we would also, we'll do ads for you. I think are they a good company? I can't remember. It's a sponsor I ever wore. Okay. And then also, I want to plug. There's a check out our Patreon at patreon.com slash Hey, we're a little five bucks a month, five bucks a month, Uncle Bucks a month gets you new content every single Friday. So please, so please subscribe

to that. But I also want to plug another podcast, another Patreon, which is you're the man now dog. It's Dan Lippert and Ryan Rosenberg to they make up one half of the teachers line. They were on a show Famously one of our favorite podcasts of all time. They were on our show They have a patreon called you're the man now dog. Please go to that subscribe. It is so worth it They have some free episodes the concept is the two of them just talking doing scenes having fun Yeah, we invented it They do it much better.

Sometimes they have guests. If you listen on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts, they have a few that are out in front of Patreon. They're not behind the paywall. So check out the one with Lauren Lapgas. It should win a medal. It's so good. And check them out.

Yeah, and that's how. And tell them Adelson. That sure sounds good too. And if you like that show, you might like our show. So listen to our show. Sorry, Daddy. You can also please, please, please, we want people to find the show. Go to iTunes and write a review. We would love five stars.

If you have to give us four, it's because of Aaron singing. We understand that. Give us four. Did someone say that? No. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Do we get four? No. One guy said that he, I was dunking too hard on Christian. So he gave us a one-star review. Will you say Christian Bale was the worst Batman? Yeah. He was the worst Batman.

I only got one Batman, and that is the Batman from the planet. A Jupiter. Oh, I didn't plug anything. Oh, well, sorry. Is it gonna... Call me Aaron, keep 10 on... on your hate, break, break your mind. On Instagram, please have a new web series. Bye. You better buy.

Forever.