Hey Riddle Riddle - #74: Booty Butt

Episode Date: December 18, 2019

We start by talking about our Chipotle orders and end with a Bond girl. All in a #Widdlewednesday! The three of us play for the bulls, Gollum tries to navigate his relationship, and we talk about a ��bad word” that’s all the rage amongst Chicago youth.Starring:Adal RifaiJohn Patrick CoanErin KeifEditing by: Casey ToneyTheme by: Arne ParrottLogo by: Emily Kardamis & Emmaline MorrisWant more? Get Weekly Bonus Eps on Patreon!Want merch? Visit our TeePublic Store!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a head gum podcast. Give me some Puzz, make it good, or else forget about it. It's Hey Riddle. And it's a hot one. What is it? Episode eight. I'll see you as so much energy. I don't know what is going on. What the fuck? You just like, yeah, you're open. Episode eight, you really brought it. Episode eight, you were like. So you're seeing episodes nine to now. I've been failing. No, I just think you were so scared of us just immediately shitting on you that. Yeah, I guess that's true. My friends that I in college, there's like a year in college where a few of my friends

anywhere we would talk in the lyrics of Smooth. Oh yeah, we'd go to get dinner and then one of us would be like, give me my change, make it dimes or else forget about it. Like just being obnoxious, make me some lunch, make it shrimp or else for a gig about it. I don't want trip for lunch. What else have I doing the rest of the day? I do I have no other plans?

Make me some lunch implies that maybe like you're making it in the morning to eat at lunch and it's like you're preparing shrimp and then letting it weigh. James, James, it's smooth. Forget about it, James, it's smooth. Gamer, it paid about a mega smooth. Or else for a gig about it. You're the only one of us who has like a nine to five. Do it, peanut butter, mac and smooth. Or else, fuck it, up to the bottom. You're the only one of us who has like a nine to five.

Do you pack your lunch in the morning? No way, no way, Jose. I go to Chipotle. What's up? My name's Eric. Your name tag says Jose. Oh shit, okay, hold on. I eat lunch like Chipotle or whatever similar

just Taurus, Codoba, I rotate between those. eat lunch like Chipotle or whatever similar to Storos could do by I rotate between those. I don't pack, I don't pack my lunch. I do order online though. Oh, I skipped that weight, baby. Never gonna wait, never gonna wait. I do that with Starbucks now. Mm-hmm.

And I just breeze past people like I'm the queen. Ooh, that woman is the queen. I thought, oh, I day day I have a norm to Starbucks line, you're so poor. Who's that lady? She just tore her skirt by stepping on it. Shut up. She got her entire dress caught in the door.

The dress took her door and she kept walking. And now she's having a fight with a dog and the dog's winning, virtually. It's a verbal fight and the dog's winning. All right, okay, you know I had a rough week. Oh. Get in a fat way, the dog. In the dog one.

Is it boring if I ask what your Chipotle order is? Do you think the audience will be bored? No, it's one of the most interesting orders. It's so kind of. I can't wait. It's not. I get a breeder ball. I get a light brown rice,

a half and a half on the beans. White rice. White rice. Very light. The brown rice is so light that it's completely bleached. That's interesting. Like a butthole.

Oh yeah, like mine. Hairless bleached. Tested like a white chipotle. And then fajita peppers. Peca de gallo guacamole lettuce. Oh, because you're a vegetarian. I do not eat the meat, but I also don't like the sofridas

that they have at a fucking chipotle. It's so gross. It's like wet tofu, it's nasty. But dostoroes and kadova both have impossible ground beef now. And it's good. It's good, yeah. But it's also like, I don't like either one of those restaurants as much.

So it's really a slog. Here's what I think. I think they're just serving you meat. Not like soy like green. It's people. No, it's just meat. Oh, the impossible meat? Yeah, then they're like,

we said it was fucking impossible. Like, what do you want from us? We want from us. We like you. We're airtight legally because we said it's impossible. Adela, is it boring if I know you're Chipotle order? My Chipotle order is that. You're setting myself up to be such a good friend.

I don't think I've been to Chipotle in a year and a half. What do you want you to know about my man? What do you snagged at my good boys? A lot of stuff from Costco. I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say,

I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, you just have to eat. Cause it's like when you buy something at Costco, you buy it in bulk. So it's like if you buy super Costco, it's like, you're a year. You're a super three days straight, my man.

Can I say, Aaron, I took you to Costco for the first time a few months ago. It was wild. I think you can hear about it over on the Patreon. I no longer when I go to Costco, I no longer eat the samples because the people there are fucking sharks. Oh yeah.

Like people circle the sample table, and as soon as there's some out, they'll grab like six, or they'll have their kids grab them, and it becomes like, it's like competitive sports. And it's nasty, and I hate it. Me and Mariah were at Costco this weekend, and they brought brownies at a little brownie oven,

and as she was walking up to them, fucking gone. Yeah, and then like sharks. I get like boxed out like the rebound. But also, like people are just insane, and I'm like, I don't like, I don't wanna do this. The point of the samples is to like, buy the product and I was like, man, we've had those brownies.

Like, we don't need the brownies. Like try something we've never had before. Yeah. But to throw a fucking bow in my neck, be, they're not short for elbow. To throw a fucking bows in my neck, because you want a rich cracker with tuna salad on it. Also, the samples at Costco are overhyped

on the food side, the real samples are on the appliance's side. I had a great harvest. I think you're a little bit of TVT. Yeah, the pharmacy. I know, if you keep tabs out. Let me sample a shark vacuum cleaner for 15 seconds. Oh, maybe. He sucked all over my body.

Yeah. I know the girl out back in there. He's not a lot back in there. He didn't over my body. I know the girl laughed back in there. He's not a lot back in there. He didn't even work there. But I called and said that he was the best employee that they've ever had. I'd like to give an employee a raise. Ernie, you were just in New York and you saw Harry Potter. Oh my God, I did.

You got to tell us about it. Oh my God, I'll tell you all about it. Well, without any spoilers. And there's something. I've seen it twice. Yeah. What without any sport? I'll miss something. Why? I see it. Twice. Yeah. And so no one else listens to this. So I think it's pretty safe to say you can talk about your experience. So, um,

You see it in two different days though, right? Well, you can see it in one day too. Like on Sundays and Saturdays. Okay. Why am I being yelled at? Am I yelling? I'm saying, I'm saying. If I had posed that so loud right now, I could be yelling and I have no idea.

I've called that, I'd say. So I, but I saw it Thursday, Friday night, and oh my God. Oh my gosh. I had hyped it up to my boyfriend so much that I, he was like, we need to go. So we already bought tickets and I'm going back. Oh, that's great. When you're going. After our live show in February. And before our live show, you and I are going to go. So I'm go, we already bought tickets and I'm going back. Oh, that's great. What are you going? When after our live show in February.

And before our live show, you and I are going to go see Haiti Stunned. I know, I'm so excited. What are you more excited for? Haiti Stunned with your boyfriend or time with me? Haiti Stunned. Have you seen Haiti Stunned yet? No, I haven't.

Oh, okay. So I think seeing the new thing. But so, I mean, I don't think Curse Child is perfect by any means. And like all of the criticism of it, I think, is fair and makes sense. I agree. Hagger to tall. Hagger to tall.

I will say, though. Hashtag Hagger to tall. My body started to shut down because for six hours, magic actually existed. And like the physics of that, I was saying to Adelaide last night that the coach Steve on Bigmouth, when he sees magic for the first time, when that dove flies out and he bursts into tears and he's like, oh no, I didn't like it. That's how I felt the whole time.

I was like, got my body, was getting angry that like physics didn't exist. You know what you'd love getting high? Maybe, but yeah, the magic of it really blew my mind and the theater is so gorgeous. And I just, I went to school for theater for a little while and I'm such a theater technard. Like I love finding out how special effects work on stage.

It's mind blowing, what they can do. Both times I saw it, the people I saw it with, I afterwards said, this show is gonna cause so many people to go into theater. I think so, yeah. So many kids to go into tech or production or directing or acting or whatever it may be. I mean, if you're a little kid and you're seeing fucking Broadway shows, probably yes.

You're probably going into that. One of the most because you're rich. One of the most frustrating things with like, because some of the special effects come back without this boiling, come back time and time again. And then I would think that I knew how something worked and would be confident and be like, okay, I did enough tech theater classes to know the basic principle of what they're doing. They're doing scumbling, it's a painting technique.

It's comfortable, yeah. And then they would do it a fourth time and how they did it that time would debunk completely my theory of what it was. So they would break the fourth wall? Yeah, they just were breaking. Our tag read rushes through like cool eight man. Hashtag Hagrid to talk. Oh, they just were breaking. Hydra-Hagrid rushes through like, cool-aid man. Hashtag Hagrid to talk.

Oh yeah. And the first three hours definitely has the cooler magic, but the second three hours just made me cry, cry, cry, cry. And this is a play or a song. Play or a song. Play or play. It's a song in the form of a play. But I think the music is by image in...

Poots? Heap. Oh man. Yeah, the much to say. Much to say. No, no, no, no, no. I remember the O.C. Ooh, what to say.

Anyways, I... Give me a child, make it cursed, or else forget about... Also, I don't want people to think that I'm rich because I certainly am not, and those tickets are so expensive. But... Then why did you just torch $400 in the parking lot before we came in? I'm rich because I certainly am not and those tickets are so expensive. But. Then why did you just torch $400 in the parking lot before we came in? Well, to make the world burn, of course.

And I don't want people to think I'm rich. I am big. Yeah. I just bought the tickets so long ago that they were pretty unexpected. I don't want people to think I'm rich, or it's just my dad. My name's Dr. Horscock.

Anyway, thank you for asking. Also, yeah, New York is so interesting. Tommy Dr. Horscock, I'm not a real doctor, but I have a New York tall buildings. Some, not all though. Yeah, Times Square sucks. Everyone knows that though. Everybody knows that. But yeah, it was fun.

I got to see some New York friends. Oh, yeah. Everybody knows that. But yeah, it was fun. I got to see some New York friends. Oh, yeah. Mary Teller Moria hair up in the air. Mm-hmm. My wig. Yeah. And then we were, we've been gone a little while.

I was gone for Thanksgiving too. I was in Massachusetts with my family. The old turkey day. How were your Thanksgiving? Good. I hung out with my sister and saw, and brother in law Doug and we saw knives out, which was being newman-o-ool.

And then we saw Mr. Rogers, which was pretty terrible. To be honest, I fell asleep during Mr. Rogers. Ooh. And then I woke up, I think it's called, like, beautiful day in the neighborhood, not Mr. Rogers, but I woke up at some point, and it was very funny,

because after the movie, I was like, that was pretty bad. And my sister's like, well, you fell asleep, which I don't normally do. And goes you missed it well you fell asleep he he fucked that guy's wife. So then her and I were doing bits of like hey there neighbor did you know that I made you a cook?

It's a fun little word isn't it? Can you say it with my cut? Sounds like something from a barn, huh? Cuck. I know. It's nothing sacred, Adel. Can we just of all the people that leave alone? It should be the geradjard.

I sang a little song. It goes, it's in the, if the pretenses that he fucked his neighbor's wife, I'm sure. Sure. She'll have a baby in nine months' time. The name will be yours. Face will be mine. He's taking off the shoes. Could you please put it on a condom? nine months times the name will be yours. Face will be mine. You're taking off the shoes.

Could you be putting on a condom? Did I fuck my neighbor? We're ruined. We ruined everything. Everything we touched turns to dust you guys. That's what I've shuttered against my massive. Stop it! Can you say massive?

I guess my Mr. Rogers is just Ronald Reagan. Yeah, really. Did you know the Gipper? Sean fell asleep during frozen, out like a light. 40 minutes in, sound asleep. Not even frozen too, frozen? Frozen too, when we saw it in theaters. Sound asleep, missed all the good parts.

Wake up and then I said, you can't say you saw frozen too. When I saw frozen too, I was aloof't say you saw frozen to when I saw frozen to I was O laughing my awesome. Do another one when I saw frozen to I had to get the else that out of there. There's the only two characters I know. I know. I knew that. I knew that. Well, this has been fun.

Do you had a good little break? Oh, yeah. Things have been the same for me. I got dressed down by best by employee. I kicked out of a comp USA for pink too. By dress down. By dress down, you mean that they put you in a khaki's in a blue polo?

In the vacuum, vacuumed you again. Shark vacuum. He took my hair down, took my glass off, made me hot and dirty. Pro. Yeah, it's great. Pretty good. Great.

Well, now we're all cut up. This is nice. Are we ready for some rentals? Oh, I'm old man puzzles. That's why we, it's been 12 minutes. We haven't had any riddles. I take the longest to get started, but I like to like, so I get to. You billi- you billi- you billi- you roll it.

You're the piano man. I'm gonna start with some really easy riddles that you should get right away. Okay. That's- this is such a fucking thing. Any time you get to that. Every fucking time you do that, we don't get them in your like yikes. I know, it's sort of a fun to me. Yeah, that's great. Aaron makes me feel very... Aaron said that she was going to start with easy riddles and then she made finger guns at both of us and blew our bare fingers out.

You, you. His stealing made his parents proud. They did not think of him as a thief. His stealing made his... Oh, he's a baseball player. Yep, see? Nice. Ricky Henderson.

Oh, Ricky Henderson. That's a baseball player. Yep. See? Nice. Ricky Henderson. Oh, Ricky Henderson. That's a baseball player. As he picked up the plates, all six fell on the brick floor. What? Not one plate was broken. Baseball player again. Yeah. He's picking up the plate and ground crew. Picking up the plates. It's at the brick yard. 500, 400, no. Oh, the plates are tectonic plates and he's God. No, it's something. God. That's funny. Oh, you're picking up tectonic plates. Can you reread it?

Oh, I'm not. Andreas fault. I'd love to. As he picked up the plates, all six fell on the brick floor. Not one plate was broken. They're rubber plates. Oh, no. Flumber plates.

Yeah, they were flopp, they were robin' Williams. Platelets. Who, who, who, flumber plates? Who, who, who, who, who, who, who, who, dropped on the floor? Ma, didn't break. Is that good? I like it.

John, mother fucks. Not good. That's great. It's great. Oh boy. Trump the place. You're sort of close, JPC. Oh, they're, they're plastic plates.

Paper plates. They're paper plates. Paper plates. MIA. Paper machine. All I want to do is boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And I check in a, mmm, mmm, fuck your neighbor. Oh.

Um, all right. A new bad boy. Yes. Kevin faced three bowls from three rings. He was overjoyed and totally unafraid. Three bowls, three rings. Michael Jordan's scabby bippin. Be chair, I'm sure. And they all wear championship rings. They're all wearing three rings. Michael Jordan's gotta be bippin. Be chair, I'm sure.

And they all wear championship rings. They're all wearing championship rings. That's actually a great answer. Yeah. That is a way better answer than this one. A quick, fun hint for this one. This one makes no sense and is stupid. And you said this is one of the easy ones we should get. Uh, you're not gonna get this one. Fuck you Jose. Cool. I want to see a brief little scene where everyone else has massive food poisoning. Aaron, Adel and I are the only three members of the Chicago Bulls that are able to play

in the game. We've never played a game of professional basketball before. You need five people to feel the team, but we're going to go out there and do it with three. Okay, can you guys just do like can someone do a talk that's gonna motivate us just really quick before we go out there? You want us to do the talk? You want us to? Yeah, the coach is sick. One of you just someone needs to get me motivated. Can we spend this time actually? Can we spend this time just reviewing the fundamentals of basketball? Can we get some reps in? Because every time dribble, it just goes right off my foot. Yeah, would I dribble too?

I'm getting the same thing. Would I dribble? I dribble it onto the top of my foot, and then it goes off at an angle. So does it come back up to my hand? Can I ask a question and no one judges me? Sure, can you be off-sized and basketball? Off-sized?

Yeah, box-sized. Off-sized. Off-sized. Can you be off-sized? I thought you met how one of your legs is two inches longer than that. That's true. This is not the time. I'm sorry, it's not the time.

It's true. It's important that we talk about a shortcoming if we're going to go out there and win a basketball game together. And what JPC actually said is true. Yeah, and your name is Ed of this, and my name is JPC. Sure. Hey, can I take you guys something? Yeah.

I just found this out. I saw one of the people's tickets in the stands. We're playing the Harlem Globetrothers. We're gonna lose. So just know, I don't know how we defend against somebody bringing a ladder on the court to dunk. We're having a bucket of water, but the bucket is paper. Okay, and I know their point guard's gonna dress up

like a woman, like an old woman, and come on. I mean. Also all the whistling. All the whistling. We can play this to our advantage. It sounds like they have the same understanding of the fundamentals of the game as we do. So, you know, maybe-

But they make all those trick shots from the halfway mark. I can make trick shots. It'll be a trick that I didn't make the shot. I'll say, surprise, we can do this. We can, we, sorry, I just have to backtrack to halfway mark. I don't know.

And then traveling is when you don't dribble and you just run with the ball. I wish halfway Mark was here. He'd know what to do. Same. So is that the answer? Is that the answer? Is nothing to do with basketball.

So there, all right. What is it? It's like a man with three. Three balls. Kevin faced three balls from three rings. He was overjoyed and totally unafraid. Is bull spelled B-O-W-L-S? No, B LLS.

Three Bulls. Oh, he is editing Nightcourt. Oh, three rings. He's using one of those looking glass, by glass telescopes and it has three rings in it to amplify the image. No. What the fuck are you doing?

But the rings are not like how their implying rings are and the Bulls are not how they're it was a stock market Yeah, ringing of the bell and then bull bear market story you're getting sort of there That's close enough that may get you yeah, and then you backed up like you you're the bull the when you said market and then the The way that you said rings is not correct It's not the ringing of the bell to open the market. Three rings. So the bowls are the market? Is it? What goes ring, ring, ring, ring?

Telephone. Yes. Peace phoning. My girlfriend? My girlfriend? Nice! That's funny. That's actually pretty solid comedy.

Fredo and Sam is. I don't know. Gollum, ring, ring, ring. I don't know. What a gollum my girlfriend have a comment. What is gollum's telephone go? Precious, precious, precious, precious. Ring, ring, ring.

What is this Korean water ghost calling my TV? Okay, wait, what, I gotta see you seeing. Oh. Um, Japs are gonna be gollum. Uh huh. And you receiving a telephone call and Aaron, you're gonna be gollum's gal. Okay. I'm receiving the phone call You're receiving the phone call

precious precious precious precious hello I got this fish I came Good night. Oh, she doesn't gonna tell you as can ask you I was gonna ask you a hungry. Oh, I could always each precious Well, I have a without you were the mood for her I Wanted to maybe just have a talk now that I have you on the phone up and thinking all day and really distracted it

We're nasty talking. I hate me. I hate talking Talking about feelings nasty feelings. Well, this is what I mean. I feel like we don't really get into our feelings much. And I just sort of want to talk about our future and like where we see ourselves in three years. Okay, three years from now, I have the pushes. So we're here to stroke me, make me feel good,

make me feel powerful, God, God, love. And we flash back two years to when it was Aaron or still your character and Japs you were smiegal at the time. Okay. Oh Sorry, I didn't mean to bump into him trying to fish It's like Erkman Erkman Erkman was a Steve Erkman and Steve Erkman Caller ever when he becomes oh, yeah, remember Erkman becomes swam. Mm-hmm. Let finish this joke What I'm what of what does my girlfriend and golem have in common? We call them.

They both turn invisible. They both... What is my girlfriend? They both kill the friend. And golem have it. They both kill the friend with a rock. I met them both at the anti-circus. It's been three rings, anti-circus.

They both love precious moments. My precious. God. Because I feel like it's, I, the only answer is maybe something, the sexist thing, which is they won't stop talking about rings. I think we can find it. Yeah, I know, but I think we can do a fun, like, we can do a different one. They're both mostly bald and a specific area.

That's my favorite. We got it. All right, are we ready? Go and only have those three wispy pieces of hair. What do you just cut those off? What is he, Homer Simpson? Oh boy, get me my ring, boys. I'm calling.

Call me. He's the guy that Kronos from God of War. Boy, boy, get me the ring. What does it say boy? That's cronus. No, cronus, no, cronus, crevice, creep, creep, prep. Let him go. He has to fight it.

Kevin. He's on his own journey now. We'll miss Addle, but he needs to do this one on his own. You got close enough. I'm just going to read it. Just, you know, I love the God of War games. I would love to see, like, you know, how the Witcher's getting its Netflix show or probably by this time it comes out, it already has its Netflix show. I would love it if they told Vind Diesel that they were giving him

a Netflix Kratos show. It really just like shot like a funnier dive video. and they just like, shot like a funnier dive video where the Jesus Christ was. Okay, never came out. It's just like a prank that they play on it. That would be amazing. Just to get them to wear like, whoa to paint. Yeah.

Put the ashes of a dead wife and kids on the side. Okay. I'm just gonna read you the answer because you are sort of you circled. You're ringin' a bowl. Kevin was a stockbroker who received three phone calls with three rings from three clients who desired to buy stocks in a bull market I can't believe you got that essential part yeah about the bull map I was very impressive bull market bulls and bears I don't

look correct it but I'm dumb what I don't look or I'm dipped like, dumb. That's a real, that's a humble brag. I don't look it, but I'm dumb. I'm dumb. Girl, I'm dumb. I found out I was talking to, we're not talking to the studio over things giving, I found some new youth speak, which she, she was just doing a play with a bunch of kids. Oh, I spelled the T. Hmm?

I spelled the T. Well, that's what it is. It's, they say period, but with a T, so they say period. So, like, he's like the coolest boy ever, period. Oh, really? It's kind of fun. And then, we also learned today from the World News Christmas Party that there's an epidemic, at least in Chicago, of little kids in like preschool saying booty butt.

And so, what? Like, a lot of the parents at the World News party were saying that booty butt has infiltrated their preschool And then all the teachers are freaking out and are like booty butts a bad word stop saying booty butt What's the context in which they're saying booty butt? They just say the word booty butt is booty butt a bad word. Why would it be where they hear what's the source? Well, that's how Rob so it was a Bobby and Marla both have their kids saying booty butt, but they learned it from different schools,

but it robbed school. It's one of the kids older brother taught it to him. And so then it infested the whole preschool where they're all saying booty butt. Why do little kids love booty butt? Yeah, but Rob's daughter now thinks bad words are fuck and booty butt. So at the party, I was like,

I was like fake dancing with her at the party and I was like booty butt, booty butt in her face went like wide and I was like booty booty booty but it was very funny. I did Rob yell at you. No, have you met Rob? Yeah, did Rob just like sigh? Yeah.

Yeah. We were doing sigh? Yeah. Yeah. We were doing a bit about his infant son being in the 99th percentile for that ass. I want to see a scene. What? I just love the term booty butt so much. I want to see a scene. Japs and Aaron, you are two preschoolers and you are learning, you have heard the scuttlebutt, which is these new words that are making it

sway into the preschool that you know are probably bad. Do I make a sand castle? Oh, yeah, Lucy, let's make a sand castle, but, can I tell you something? Yeah. Okay, don't tell anybody. Okay. My older brother said the worst word

that we could say at recess. What? Is tickle finger. I'm sorry, say that again. Sh, sh, sh, okay. Tickle finger. Tickle fucker. Five more minutes.

Okay, thank you. Thank you, fat, thank you. You tickle finger. What did you, what did you say? Lucy said it. Lucy, I don't even know what that means. I'm, I don't even know what that means. I'm sure you don't even know what that means. Do you call me tickle finger? What's a tickle finger? You called me one. What is one? Get my van.

No, thank you. Get my van. Don't tell your teacher. Get my van. Wait a minute. Hey you, you get out of here. You've been warned. Sorry about that, kids. What's a tickle finger? Well, that's what that man was. What's a tickle finger? Well, that's what that man was. See. Hmm. See, Eric. What do you think is the worst swear? Hmm.

I mean, I don't want to say it on the air. Yeah, but I agree. It's that one. I think we're all in agreement. It's not fuck. I'd say the seaworth. Yeah, I think the seaworth's the worst. The seaworth.

Cancer. More? They see. the seaworth. Yeah, I think the seaworth's the word. The seaworth. Cancer. Or... They see. Um, kind of think of things I thought were bad words when I was young. I mean, I've said this on the podcast before, but my mom had a rule where we had no head words. We weren't allowed to say like poopy head or dumb head or idiot head. So that's what I say, poopy cock and dumb cock and...

Yeah, we had to replace it with cock. That's really... I would be super devastated if people, if anyone called me an idiot head, that's, that's, that'll gut me. Yeah. You idiot head. But they are my favorite alt rock band.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Okay, computer. Mives out. Pick a fun guy's name. Hunter. Hunter. Okay. Kevin and Hunter inadvertently moved their team forward as they approached the finish line. Their Blunder changed a sure victory into defeat.

Their Blunder? Their Blunder. They inadvertently moved their team forward as they approached the finish line. Their Blunder. The finish line is the store in the mall. No. Okay, I find a finish line. I find a Blonderminer.

Captain Hunter inadvertently moved their team forward as they approached the finish line. Their blunder changed a sure victory into defeat. So they moved towards the finish line and then lost. So it's a finish line. So it's a race. Yes. Yes, okay. Is it a relay race? line. So it's a race. Yes. Yes, okay.

Is it a relay race? No. Is it a backwards race? Wait. What do you mean by that? No, okay. So finish a race, get for place. No.

Is it a potato sack race? No. They're blunder. They're blunder made sure they got first place. No, they're blunder put them in the history books as the biggest losers of the race. But that's any race. No, but they moved closer to the finish line. No. What? Kevin and Hunter inadvertently moved their team forward as they approached the finish line.

Oh, no. They're blunder changed a sure victory. It took a war. No. It's not a tug of war. Move their team towards the finish line. So what? No, they move their team forward. Forward, which is not to the blunder. The finish line. Yeah. So the finish line. So JPC was closest with backwards race. What is a backwards race?

Who races backwards? E-Lac. Well, I'd say white people are backwards race. We get everything wrong. We fuck it up for everyone. What race do you race backwards? Yeah. Boy, oh boy. That would be... I will say. This is a hint. This is your hint.

Is when I read this, I understood that this, what it was. I got it right. Am I a fan? Musical theater race? No, because of what part of the country. Oh, E-car, respect. So I think this is maybe bigger. Boston Marathon. Oh, yeah, the Boston Marathon, historically,

they run it all backwards and blindfolded. This is maybe a thing that people do that is really not, I don't know anyone in the Midwest. Box guard Derby. Who did this? Maybe they do. Would we know the phrase or the term or the words? Yeah. Hmm. I mean, it's in the Olympics. Scott Derby. Who did this? Maybe they do. Wouldn't we know the phrase or the term or the words?

I mean, it's in the Olympics. Do you wear a, are you in a car? No. Are you in a Bob's blood? No, you're in something. You're in something. You're in something. Are you pissing?

Yeah, you're pissing. It's a piss race. It's a piss race. I would win that. I think he's so fast, you guys. I think he's so fast. No. God, just what happened to me?

I was not like this have a stream like that. Oh boy. Um, I have a question that this is maybe I'm embarrassing someone if you don't feel this way. Um, uh, so Sean told me that when he was little, he always wanted to pee loud so that girls could hear him and think that he was like strong. Like, his loud pee would be an indicator of his masculinity.

When you were younger, did you think that? No, but I know a lot of people who did, a lot of people have mentioned that where it's like when they are at the urinal, they would like try and hit the water versus the sides so that they were like, it's almost like asserting your dominance. Yeah. Yeah. I will say that the strength of which you are peeing into a urinal, I think, is directly correlated with the amount of splashback that happens. So men are disgusting. But any public restroom that you ever go into when you're like, wow, look at all this

piss all over the toilet. It's not because people aren't aiming. It's, well, it is that sometimes, but also like, try going to a, using a urinal wearing shorts and you'll understand, oh, this is a terrible device. We should all just be sitting down to be nothing as sanitary here. Most people walking out of a public bathroom should take a shower. Can I tell you a secret of mine? No. Anytime I go into a stall, even if I'm like grabbing tissue to like blow my nose and I don't use the toilet, if there's

pee on the toilet seat, I have to wipe it down because I'm so fearful that whoever comes it after me is going to be like, this fucking guy. just a Disco worried it. I never piss on the seat But if if I go into a stall you never piss on the seat. No, not even a four-inch That is a secret but my brain is like broken to where I'm so fearful that someone's gonna come in after me And be like you see that guy over there. He pissed all over the seat I bet you get a lot of support on Twitter today. Really? Yeah, I do. Public Russians are very disgusting, just in general. Yeah.

There's a societal contract that they can't be too disgusting, you know? But people leave them in disarray, I would say. Whenever I go into public Russia, yeah, it does arrive. You gotta be cool, you gotta be pissed. Whenever I go into any public restroom, I loudly announce everybody out. This is a thing. You gotta be pissed. When I've ever went to any public restroom, I loudly announce everybody out. And this is a thing. I say, me and this guy are fighting.

And they can't see me, but I'm pointing right to my balls. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, did we get the answer? No, you didn't. It wasn't any of that talk. We moved with the show.

That should be on the tagline from the show. We didn't get the answer. It wasn't any of that talk. Move the team away. Kevin and Hunter inadvertently moved their team forward as they approached the finish line. Their blender changed a sure victory into a defeat in something.

Is it a car? Is the team have wheels? No. They're on their feet. But it moves. Is there a ball involved? No. Is it like a multi,

or not on their feet? It's not loose. No. Is it like a bike or like a multi person bike? No. Is it like a bike or like a multi-person bike? Nope. Are four people, are multiple people powering the same mode of transportation? Yes. Okay.

How many people? Four? I think it depends. I'm trying to think of the... Damn it. Is it a loose? Sometimes it's two people, sometimes it's four or six maybe?

Four, I think. Do you power this thing with your feet? No. Okay, so it's not like anything in your hands? It's gas powered. Do you power this thing with your feet? No. Okay, so it's not like anything like that. Is it gas powered? No. Because it's an Olympic sport. Bowling.

No. It's not skis. Is it skis or snowboarding or anything like that? No. Is it winter Olympics or summer? Summer. Summer Olympics. What a hell.

What the hell. Oh boy. Okay. What the fuck is the Olympics? So they're in it. I did the non-traditional version of the hell? Oh boy. Okay. What the fuck is the Olympics? So they're in a- I did the non-traditional version of the sport for two years in high school. Horse polo.

I did like a version of this. No, it's not horses. It did a brazen. Is it an animal that involved an animal? No. So it's a machine that you want? It's a water car. Water?

Water. Oh, synchronized swimming. Growing crew. Growing crew. Mm-hmm. They were in a rolling race and should have been moving backwards. You move backwards.

Mm-hmm. When you roll. That's, you gotta be pretty fucking dumb to go forward. Is it a race that's supposed to be to ride backwards? Okay, do you know that the person in the very front of the boat is called a cox-wayne? Mm-hmm.

And they are the one that yells out the orders, correct? I, Aaron, you are going to be the cox-wayne in the crew boat that Adel and I are rowing. Okay, ready? Row. Row. And row. Wait, I'm so sorry.

And compliment me, what? Sorry, my name is Derek Row. Oh, okay, should I say a different word for row? Yeah, Derek. I want to say Derek. No, that'll be just as easy as you. Yeah, can you just say any different word for row? Yeah, Derek. I wanna say Derek. No, that'll be just a stupid thing. Yeah, can you just say any different word for row? And let's take it from the top.

Okay. Chicken. Okay, I'm so sorry. This is Philip Chicken. We have to stop, I'm Phil Chicken. Okay, all right, so. And you knew that, right? I'm so sorry, maybe that was why it was top of mind.

My feathers in my head. I got this, I got this. Okay. Carnival and carnival and carnival actually can you set this is a carnival cruise line ship that we're rowing Okay, so that's not gonna help us Longest orders Hullabaloo Hullabaloo

I'm Dick Cheney and I own property primary state I think Sean Mullins. Mullins. Is this going to see us? Melancholy. I think Billy Corrigan was going to see us. I am shade. Who I think Steve Carell's a message.

Keep going. Playground. I think Marcia is going to see us. Keep going. We did a work. Jellyfish. Ooh, jellyfish. I think I think we're good. I think we're good. I don'tfish. Oh jellyfish, I think. I think we're good.

I think we're good. I don't want to say jellyfish. I didn't do the traditional, like, those sleek boats, like the two guys in social network. Oh, yeah. That kind of rowing. The Wink of Lost Twins. I didn't do that through my high school, but there was a place near where I grew up called Hall and through the Hall Life Saving Museum, we used to get into the old fashioned

row boats. And we would row out to one of the Boston Islands, like Georgia's Island, and go and explore like an abandoned war bunker and like go swimming and stuff and then row back. That seems illegal. Yeah, probably. No, I mean, you're allowed to go, but we, um, it was so, it was like the best exercise of my life, but I stopped doing that because any time it was bad weather,

we would still go and it would be, you'd be soaking wet and you'd be like chafing and then like cold in this boat and your clothes would soak through. But it's really cool if anyone's from that part of Massachusetts. You can also do it. I wonder if they still do it. You can go to a gym and use a rowing machine too. No, but there's something about like moving and going somewhere when you're rowing and doing it with other people and then going to a really beautiful location and it was really only fun

though when it was really nice outside. But beautiful location. You were in Boston though, right? Yeah. Yeah, okay. Okay. Well, on that note, I'm going to take a break, kind of. Um, do you guys want to take a break at the same time? I take my break?

Yeah, when you cool off, I'm gonna cool out a Dunkin' Donuts baby. Why you cool out of it? I'm gonna talk to Scott Akram and Zwei for cool off. Wow, not really. Okay, we'll be back. Hey, GPC. Uh, yeah? Hey GPC. Uh, uh, yeah.

You're not in trouble. I just need help. I'm, um, pranking Addle. And I'm setting up a whole website to prank him. Um, can I just need some advice? This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. I'm not, I'm not mad at you. We're pranking Addle.

Squarespace is the in one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and to see it online whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand. Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website engage with your audience and sell anything for products that cut into time all in one place all on your terms. Hey, Otto on your terms. Hey, Otto, come here. Come here, come here. Hey, what's going on?

I actually, I want to prank JPC, and I want to set up a whole website to prank him. Do you have anything that like, is there like an online store that could set up on my website to sell products? Did you know that with Squarespace, you can have custom merch. You can easily sell custom merch and create

passive income stream that engages your audience and scales your brand, design your products and production and inventory and shipping are handled for you saving you time and money. What is happening? Okay. Wait, what's going on with that all? Oh, nothing, nothing. I'm just setting up a very normal Squarespace website, not a prank thing.

No, he's gonna do it. And I'm gonna use analytics, use insights to grow my business and learn where my site visits and sales are coming from. That's pretty cool. I'm gonna improve my website and build marketing strategy based on top keywords, our popular products and content on my prank website, the prank activity.

Whoa, that's awesome, Aaron. I'm glad you're using Squarespace. Did you say what the website was for? I can't remember what the website was for. No, the website was for? I can't remember what the website was for. Frank. Squarespace. You can connect to your store to Vedent Third Party tools to extend the functionality of your website. Hey JPC, hey JPC. What's up, battle? I can't believe we pranked Aaron with our little boy routine. Dude, we got her. Anyway, if you want to prank Aaron with your little boy routine, head to squarespace.com

for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, she's back. She's back. Hey, Aaron. Hey, Aaron. Can we go to grandma's house?

Wait. I've been pranked. But how? I don't know. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey Adeline JPC, thank you for meeting me in the middle of the woods here. I am sort of at an impasse. I can't decide whether or not to go this way or this way.

I'm having a hard time choosing a path. You know, there never truly is a middle of the woods. Isn't it funny to think about something like that? There never truly is a middle of the woods. No, this is the middle. Okay, this is it. Addle, can you help? Yeah, actually.

So as per Robert Frost, I don't know if you know his poems. He has a poem called Better Help. I believe this is written in the 1800s, but it still stands true today more than ever. Aaron, you should try better help. Have you heard of this? You seen this? Mm-hmm.

Because sometimes Aaron and life were faced with tough choices and the path forward isn't always clear whether you're dealing with decisions around career relationships, being stuck in the middle of the woods. Therapy helps you stay connected to what you owl, owl. Sorry, that also does so fast. Therapy helps you stay connected to what you really want, owl. Sorry, that also does so fast. Therapy helps you stay connected to what you really want while you navigate life and the woods. And better help is entirely online,

so it's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. I've been using it for several years, and it suits the way that my brain works, way better than traditional therapy ever did. And when Aaron says traditional therapy, just so everyone's clear, what she means is tricking two of her friends to coming to the middle of the woods, even though there isn't

truly the concept of the middle of the woods. Isn't that fun to think about? All you have to do is just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a license therapist, and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. Hey, Aaron, a GPC's putting down bread crumbs and then immediately picking them up and eating them. Dirty bread crumbs. Mmm. And he's also like really into that owl who's swooping down. Anyways, let there be your map with BetterHelp.

Visit betterhelp.com slash riddle today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelpHELP.com slash riddle, R-I-D-e-l-p dot com slash riddle r-i-d-d-l-e. R-i-d-d-l-e the middle of riddles of D but there is no true middle of riddle because it would be the space in the L.I.P.C. I'm hoping at home. I am home. Who are we?

What is this? I, clink, clink, clink. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen. I just want to make a quick toast to, I know it's JPC's birthday. And we're all so excited to talk about him. But I want to talk about my favorite, my favorite thing in the world. And that is the app rocket money. Oh, yeah, Aaron, that's one of my favorite things as well. Rocket money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions. Monitor your spending and helps you lower your bills all in one place. I've been using it for

years way before they were a sponsor and it helps me so much, especially around tax season. Clink, clink, clink, clink, clink. Sorry, I also want to give a toast. Rocket Clean, clean, clean, clean, clean, uh, uh, sorry, I also want to give it a toast. Rocket money will quickly and easily find your subscriptions for you. And for any you don't want to pay for anymore, just hit cancel and rocket money will cancel it for you. It's that easy. Clean, clean, clean. Mm hmm. It also categorizes your expenses so you can easily track your budget in real time and

also get alerted if anything looks off. Over three million. Well, clean, clean, million, over three million people have used rocket money, saving the average person up to $720 a year. We love rockets coming here. Stop, stop, stop, no, stop, stop. Throwing your money away, cancel unwirted subscriptions today

and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocketm money.com slash riddle That's rocket money.com slash riddle rock at money.com slash riddle and tell them JPC's birthday got ruined by two of his friends for doing speeches about rocket money the website I love you. I'm gonna go grab your money. I'm gonna go grab your money. Hey, Rick, go Rick, go. Oh, man. And we're back and this is the Marcee's playground hour. We are taking over for Hey Riddle Riddles since they used our intellectual property. And we're gonna talk about different things

we're smelling in the room. Other members of Marcee's playground, do you wanna mention what you can smell in the room? Hey, Osmail drums in, uh, play drums. Who's that keeping for, for time for the duration? Baby, it's got to be Johnny drums. Aaron, uh, we were gonna do some more riddles. Yeah. I thought we'd move on to some listener submitted riddles. We don't burn through them fast enough and people keep sending in awesome riddles, so.

Yeah, we're getting pretty close to having a thousand listeners submitted riddles in real life. Really? Yeah. So probably some of them are repeats. We can't stress enough. Please continue to email us riddles at HRR Podcasts if you've not found.

Yeah, never stop. But if you can make up your own, that's the sweet spot. That's my favorite. I cannot stress this enough. We will not respond to the e-mails. We'll put them in a folder, from riddles emissions, and then we'll use them periodically. We'll put that in a folder and a computer,

drown that computer. Okay, computer. Speaking of original riddles. Would you say strokes? Speaking of original riddles. What'd you say, strokes? Speaking of original riddles. Buh-buh-buh. Oh, Aaron, went into that cartoon. I'm stuck.

Hey, HRR crew. My name is Aiden. I don't know if we have permission to say your last name, Aiden, from Chicago, and I wrote some riddles for you all. Okay. Hope you enjoy. Well, us too. Well, yeah, we hope we enjoy too. They didn't know what a weird thing to say.

We got three original riddles from Aiden. Are we ready? I guess so. Let's us do this. I need to get my vision checked. I put my computer basically up on my face. For listeners who aren't in the studio, which is everyone, Aaron has picked up her laptop in one hand and brought it closer to her face, like she's reading from a magazine.

If anyone has time to take me to the eye doctor, I'd really appreciate it. There is a cross on an iron hill with a road that leads to nowhere. There is a hole that must have its fill, but the hole is not filled with air. The lands are conjoined in addition, but by the road that leads to non-existence. But if the road fails its mission, the people will lose their sense. What am I talking about? What are this incubus lyrics?

What are you going on over here? This is incubus lyrics. Hold the wheel and drive. This is some flowery poetry. This is one of those kinds of riddles. Where this is maybe a common thing that we're really, what's that improv thing that's so hard to teach and to do?

Sweet bit, it's comedy. Sweet bit, it's funny. That's really funny. Being that really funny, not fucking it up. What is it? What are you talking about? When you go like, you are thou art. Oh, invocation. Invocation.

This is sort of like the end of an invocation type riddle. Okay. So like those are a very common type riddle. So an iron cross. There is a cross on an iron hill. Okay, so the hills made of iron, there's a cross. That's probably gonna be, I mean, right off the bat, I wanna say that that's like the site on a gun.

Oh, okay. Iron hill made me think like helmet, and there's a cross on a helmet, like it's a crusade. Cool. No, not other of those, but I love, you're thinking the right way. Okay. With a road that leads to nowhere.

There's a hole. Road that leads to nowhere, that's a happy trail. That's a Paul McCurney song. So both of these things are not gonna help you. He's a real nowhere road. This is probably a very helpful line. There's a hole that must have its fill. Vagina.

But the hole is not filled with air. Golf course, golf course. Golf course. She'll die. Oh, he's never joined in. That's supposed to wait. Can we pot? I have to call my doctor.

It shouldn't feel like a balloon. I'll talk to you later. I'll talk to you later. There's a whole. It's a hole that needs to be filled and it's. Is helium okay? Again, I'll talk to you later. Yeah, but your vagina sounded real high pitch. It's so expensive, too.

They're not making it anymore, helium. Thank you. A variance of a genus. Oh, boy. I did that to myself. Sure. The hole needs to be filled, but not filled with air. Okay, so donut. The hole needs to be filled but not filled with air. Mm-hmm. Okay, so don't it. The hole needs to be full. Filled with jelly. Is hole spelled H-O-L-E? Yes.

Hole needs to be filled but not with air. And it's not a golf course, like Jep said. No. Holes need to be filled with things that are big smaller. Big smaller. All the time. Big smaller than many golf course? No. Not many golf, all the time. Many, many offers. No, many calls. That was funny. The lands are conjoined in addition by the roads that lead to non-existence. But if the road fails its mission, the people will lose their sense. And the workers are going home. I say, okay, this is the most important part is the, there's a hole that must have its

fill, but the hole is not filled with air. There's a hole that must have its fill, but the hole is not filled with air. There's a hole that must have its fill, but the hole is not filled with air. Where do we put the hole? Oh, a hole. A hole. A hole. We got to go to a hole. No.

Let's see a quick commercial for a hole. Kids, if you are between the ages of 13 and 18, what I want you to do, I want you to get a big batch of coals. Go to your dads or moms golf course. You're going to dump coleslaw in the hole. Next time they go, next time we parent gals, they're going to try and get a putt, easy, give me putt. All's going to go right by the hole because it's filled with.

That band guy's back. Everybody get him. Fuck. Get out of here, band guy. Get out of here, booty butt. I had a name. It wasn't finger bangles. Tickle fingers.

That tickle fingers is always trying to get kids to do things they should. Hashtag whole slow. There's a cross on an iron hill with a road that leads to nowhere. There's a hole that must have its fill, but the hole is not filled with air. The lands are conjoined in addition by the road that leads to non-existence. But if the road fails its mission, the people will lose their sense. What am I talking about? Honestly, after the first line, my eyes glaze over.

Yeah, this is difficult. I don't know what any of the words in this mean. Like, because it's a jump so fast, it's like, hey, there's this crossing a hill. And then also this hole, and then it's like, and then two lands joined. And it's like, when did we get to that? I think this is a really good one. And I think all of the ones that I get. Because you see the answer.

Well, yeah, totally. But I think there's a cross on an iron hill. So there's the hill is made of, can I guess, Adon's last name? Yeah. A bedding? No. Which is really clever.

Like, what has a symbol like this on it? What has a symbol that has a cross on it? Jesus. Or like an X. Across or an X. An X. Map. I'd say like you can,

if you turn it on its side, it's more of an X. Turn it on its side. But like you can turn it. So it can be like a cross or an X, depending on what angle you're looking at it for. And sometimes it's just a line. I wanna see a scene. See said it could be a cross or an X.

James, I want you to be my favorite rapper, DM Cross. And you're rapping about Jesus and religion. Got it. Is this gonna lose us listeners? No, it's good. And Aaron, you're the producer in the booth. Hey, do you kids like rap music? Yeah. Well, great you kids like rap music? Yeah.

Well, great, because, you know, we're doing something different at church today. Please welcome a very special guest, Mr. D. M. Cross. And then the priest puts on, takes off his glasses and he ripples up his hair a little bit. Wow, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff, riff. I'm DM Cross and I'm here to say I'm down with Jesus in the major way.

He was in the major- Shut the fuck up! Okay, Deacon Gregory. I asked you before, Mass, if you could just please support me in this thing. So I'm just- Start over! Before mass if you could just please support me in this thing, so I'm just Woof rift bow wow wow well the M crosser in here to say I'm kind of into Jesus in the major way He went from the major to suck Deacon Gregory my name's not Deacon Gregory and he takes off his glasses and rustles us air

My name is microphone testament Well, well you Corridged in the house gonna eat some body of Christ who wants come on. Well, well, you've got to be in the house, going to eat some body of Christ. Who wants, come on, hey. I was helping. Don't woof me. DM cross.

Oh, you could eat my ass, deacon Gregory. I will eat it. And I'll save room for seconds. Ooh, this is what church is. Say it. Say it. I'm going to give you the answer to this.

No. Because I want to get to the other one. Get here. No, give me hints. Don't give me the answer. Okay, so this also, maybe I'm being dumb, but this also can just have a line on it. No, that's a really good hint. This can also have a line on it.

It's not always a cross. It's sometimes just a line, but I think it's mostly a cross. And it helps. Did she need some things? You need some things. Plus, minus, times? Yep, it looks like that, but you need, no. You need to, it's something that fills a hole.

And it not just fills a hole, it often is the thing that also makes the hole. Tetris? What's something that fills a shovel? No. Pickaxe? It's like a shovel or that stays in that spot. Dead shovel.

A post? So it feels a hole. Like for a fence? Yeah, close. Think of it really small. Roots? It's a really small. And on top of it is an X.

And the X is what helps something else put it into the hole. What? Is this tic-tac-toe? No. It's a small object. And you're saying? That is all that goes into something. I said the moment before. It makes a hole in something and then it stays there.

Until you take it out. A knife? No. I made a hole in this guy. It helps. Until you take it out. It helps keep something else in place. Make me a hole, leave it there or else for good.

It makes a hole to help you keep something else in place. Make me a whole leave it there or else for good. It makes a whole to help you keep something else in place. It's like iron glue. Iron glue. Welding. It's like iron glue. Glue is not a good thing because that implies that it's like a... I'm gonna tell you what it is. Yeah, I guess so.

It's a screw. It's like iron glue. It's like, I'm glue on your wedding day. Is that free ride? Would you just have to make? Is that amazing? And who would have thought that sucks? I like that one.

I mean, it's hard. Those like flowery language riddles are always really tough because it's hard to like narrow it down. So what were the two bodies were connected? I mean, it's hard. Those like flowery language riddles are always really tough because it's hard to like narrow it down. So what were the two bodies where connect, I mean, it's like connecting to pieces of metal. Sure. Why not? There's a cross of an iron hill with a road that leads to nowhere. There's a hole that must have its fill, but the hole is not filled with air. The lands are conjoined in addition by the roads that lead to that existence. But if the road fails its mission, the people will lose their sense. What is the hill? What is the road feels especially the people will lose its sense mean?

So here's the thing about this. I guess every story I've seen in my life is flat. When you two don't get riddles, you just hate it. This was a rule. This was a riddle with a lot of words and not a lot of information. We're doing the next one because I want to get to all of their riddles before Aden, honestly, please keep sending riddles. We're setting a back, we're like, please send us riddles and then we like tear it apart.

Well, I would say that if Aden wants to keep sending riddles, maybe make them better. Even with medaid and two because they live in Chicago. So hi Aden. Hi Aden. There is a kingdom with great walls around it. The castles and hills change every day. When it rains, the kingdom becomes stronger and when it's dry, the kingdom falls apart. What is the kingdom? Sand. Sorry, I was thinking if I met Aiden, can you repeat that?

Yep. There is a kingdom with great walls around it. The castles and hills change every day. When it rains, the kingdom becomes stronger, and when it's dry, the kingdom falls apart. Is this a great short story? What are we supposed to solve? What? What's the Kingdom? It's something that falls apart when it's dry but it's helped you mind it's wet. You kind of had it sort of before or what you said. What would you say? Doesn't matter. Desert matter? Desert, so sand. Yeah, that's funny. Yeah, but where? It is a desert? No. Sandbox.

Sandcastles? Yeah. It's just sandcastles. There's a kingdom with great walls around it. The castles and hills change every day when it rains. The kingdom becomes stronger when it's dry. The kingdom falls apart. Aaron, speaking of sandbox, we're going to take a little visit to more of your riddles

because Sandy is not here. Speaking of sandbox, I want to see a scene. JPC, we are back in the sandbox. Great. We're those kids from earlier. And you've learned a new bad word that you're going to tell me about. Hey, I'm sorry about earlier with that tickle finger guy. I should find his friend. He's a creepy, I'm glad he's not around anymore.

I was just, you know, we got school off for that day because of the incident. Yeah. And my big brother at home, he me to the curse word. What is it? School off. What is this frozen to? Oh, man, listen, I need to explain myself. I just want you kids to get in my van So you can test drive it because I'm trying to sell this man You gotta believe me. Hey, I'll all of my little with your jiggle fingers. We're kids. We don't want the van You know, we're not your target fingers. We're kids, we don't want the van, you know? We're not your target market.

I said, that's totally fine. That's totally fine. Now I know I'll leave you alone. Okay. I just need to clear my name. I'm not weird, I'm not a group. Hey buddy, this isn't how you do it. This isn't how you clear your name.

Just so you know, we're kids, you know. Wait, what you're doing now? Looks equally suspicious. Let me make it up to you, here's some candy. Okay, this is $400. Thank you. doing now looks equally suspicious. Let me make it up to hear some candy. Okay, this is $40 I call money candy Seen Can't go back to that. I can't see where this is gonna hide

Are we ready for another one? I call money candy Money candy money candy. Hey money canter I'm a machine if I wear a bond girl, I would want my name to be Money Candy. No, I wouldn't. What would my bond girl name me? Money candy. Percy kitty. Percy kitty.

Kitty. Meow meow. Kitty puppy. Um, you're a bond girl. So money penny is not a bond girl. So your, your, JPC and I will take turns, um, giving you, nobody knows.

No, so, so the way that a bond girl... Sleepy, Dirty. No, no, no, we're gonna do it. We're gonna do it. Sleepy, cookie. We're gonna do it. Word at a time, too. Okay.

So you give the first name, we'll give you the last name. Okay. And then I'll give the first name and you give the last name. Great. So Sleepy's gotta be in it. So Sleepy? Spooky, which. Alright.

How about Slouchy? This is just a door. A door? Yeah. Your first name is Valentine. Petunia. I'm going to look up online to see if there's a bond girl named generator. What if your bond girl name was baked potato? Someone else has googled this. It's like a quid. Yeah, there's a bond girl named generatorator. You got to find that one up. Yeah, Erin, you got to do this. Quick detour. You have to take a quick quiz, are you ready?

Absolutely. Which generation do you belong to? Are we? We're answering for you. So it's greatest generation before 1946, baby boomer, 46 to 64, Generation X, 6584, Millennial 82, 2004, Generation Alpha. I don't think that's what it's called, isn't it? Why? Generation Alpha? 2005, till now. I think greatest generation. I don't think that's what it's called, isn't it? Why? Generation Alpha Bob.

2005 till now. I'd say greatest generation. I would say boomer. I'm generation X, but I believe that X is the greatest generation. So you choose whatever you want. Basically, we're Aaron, we're doing it for you, right? Yeah. Who do you, what do you currently do in life?

Good question. I'm still trying to work that out. I work in an office. I do not work in an office. Full time student and rocking it. I'm a traveler. I'm going to office. I do not work in an office. Full-time student rocking it. I'm a traveler. I'm going to do I do not work in an office. Yeah, that's that's what your deepest desire. Inner and outer piece, a compassionate world, personal growth, finding true love, understanding other people. Say a compassionate world. Oh. What would you say is your strongest quality? I'm a bit of a bright spark intelligence. I'll

just read the intelligence kindness, creativity, strength, confidence. Confidence. Creativity. Confidence. Creativity. Maybe creativity. Okay. What role do you play in your friendships?

I like to make my friends laugh. They always come to me for advice. I tend to be the peacemaker between my friends. I offer support where I can. I'm usually the one who helps them fix things. Well, I was gonna say tree number two. What role do you play in life? Thirdly.

How often do you work out? This isn't sort of an attack. How many more questions are there? I'm gonna go through these areas right now. A couple more. And we can cut this out if it gets boring. The people that Jim know me by my name, I'm gonna say getting out of bed is enough work out for me.

Yeah, people say. Why did you take like this test? It looks like fun. Your bond girl name is you are not a bond girl. Okay. Okay. Ah. Um.

Okay. Your bond girl name is set dresser. Okay. This is taking too long. Okay. Aaron, you got to keep reading the quiz. Oh, okay. All right.

No, you two were talking. Um, uh, do you have a bucket list? Yes, I'm halfway through it already. Uh, no, but I don't't I do know what I want life. Mr. Bucket. Mr. Bucket list. Mr. Bucket list. Mr. Bucket list. Dark. Pick one of the one of the below. You are other or a slinky blonde female spy. I'm sorry, Aaron. We need to take a quick time out because I got mine. Oh, okay.

Go ahead, no, what's this? We're not gonna say, JAPES just gave for free the most brilliant advertising to any chicken place. Oh, yeah. Which is, put us on your bucket list. Uh-huh, uh-huh. So Popeyes, crystals, KFC,

but those are the big three churches, churches, reach out. JBC is willing to work with you. I'm willing, I'm willing, I'm willing, I'm willing to check it on your bucket list. I'm willing to sell you the thing that I just said for free. This is hysterical. Okay, what's your bond of girl name?

But the intro to this is lucky little you. Is that your name? Your classic looks in vapid charm have earned you the moniker, Misty Flex. Ooh, you have to call me Misty Flex. So because you don't work out at all, they gave you the last name Flex. Shut up, Adam.

It's like Mr. X in a rest of development. Misty Flex. Yeah, I mean. If you see me in person, please call me Misty Flex. We're gonna do a whole line of Misty Flex merch. This is gonna really take off for me. All right, are we ready for the last riddle? Yes, no, we know my bottom is what are JPC and annals? Bongo names. We can we'll do that on. Yeah, treat it as if you want them to take my

Danyles Are we ready? Yes, I'm a machine. I control all the people. I sit above the masses as I line up to see me I keep them safe from themselves those who disobey me might die. What am I church? God? Andrea God row back up hmm Sit above the people sit above the people. I'm a machine. I control all the people I sit above the masses as they line up to see me I put them safe from themselves those who disobey me might die. Satellite. No.

Fuck. What if you disobey my shoes? I have a new confidence now that I'm misty flex. Do you see how I changed a little bit? What gown is this? Weird flex, but okay. We're misty flex, but okay. Weird messy flex, but okay.

What machine that if you disobey it, you might die. I mean, oxygen tank. I got really burned from a popcorn machine once. Well, you called it a cum. Yeah. Oh, I guess I will say that right. You broke it hard. You dated it for three years, and then you broke it hard.

So yeah, of course I've heard you. It sits above you though, right? Toilet tank? I sit above the masses. So above the masses? Oh, it's a robot church. I'm a machine. I control all the people. I sit above the masses as a lineup to see me. I can't stop imagining you dating a popcorn maker. I keep them safe from themselves. Those who disabame me might

die. One am I. What machine do you line up to see cash register? I think Aiden. I honestly Aiden please keep writing riddles. I really love these. Well done Aiden. Aiden probably died years ago. Possibly. Aiden, I don't know, they burned down years ago. They sent this not years ago. Oh, okay, interesting.

Okay, interesting. That's a little clue for us for the riddle. So it's something of a pop culture rips from the head. So they didn't disobey the robot. When it says hi above us, Aaron, does it mean like in the atmosphere? No. Okay, good. So it's just,

we can see it. Okay, we can see it. That's actually essential that we see it. It's essential we see it. We don't see it, we could die. Hmm. Oh, uh, uh, yeah, stoplight. Yeah.

Yeah. Nice. I'm a bitch, I'm a lover, I'm a stoplight, I'm a lover, I'm playing red, green and yellow, I ever said I'm a self-ass. I didn't have started. Uh-oh, Missy Flex, your confidence just went down to one. Right where it was before. Or a nose dive, Missy Flex.

Um, right, those are Aiden's riddles. Aiden, thank you, Aiden. Thank you, Aiden. Thank you for your partnership in this great endeavor. Aiden, thank you. Next. I want to see a scene, uh, Adel, you are James Bond, JPC or a bartender. Okay. I'm Missy Flex, I'm sitting at the bar, and I may not be the most conventional bond girl

that you've met. bartender, please come over here. Yes, sir. What can I get you today? Well, I've put five sterling pound on the table and what I'd like is a collada, a pinia collada. How any special way that you'd like that preferred? Yes. Frozen.

Perfect. And this is, of course, on the house, because a certain someone has already paid for your drinks tonight, so. Oh, fuck me, who do we have here? What's your name, beautiful? Misty, flax, sorry. I have a little bit of a cold on my period.

It's like no funny business tonight, but I think you're pretty cute. You just coughed out a hornet. Now it's fighter. What's up with you? Your Pina Caladasa and man. So do you have gluten free pizza here? I'm like a little hungry.

Misty, I have to say that I like your style but I can't even comment on your legs because you have a weird towel wrapped around them. Yeah, well here's the thing, this is what happened. So I was wearing spanks all day, and those really get to you. And then I went to my hotel room, and I couldn't get my spanks off. So this is what I did.

I went out to see, yeah. Well, this is gonna be a whole story, huh? It's a whole story. I went out to CVS, and then I got scissors to cut the spanks off me. I accidentally cut my leg when I was cutting my spanks off me, which is like, oh, to be a woman, always a bridesman, yeah, always a bridesman.

And so I cut it off and then I hit that artery in your leg where you bleed out. So I wrapped this towel around my leg. So the femoral artery and I wrapped the towel around it. And that's just so I don't bleed out. Well, Misty, I have a suite to the hotel. Would you like to come up and I'll try and stitch that up? I'm a little tired.

Do you want to get brunch in three weeks? I'll probably cancel. No, I'm good. See you then. And that was my bond, girl. Probably cancel. Cool. Thanks for listening, you guys. I always feel guilty when I'm old man puzzles. I don't know why you feel guilty

I'm not funny to be a woman JPC just threw his head back and just like exhaustion I always feel guilty. I was feel guilty I always feel guilty. I always feel guilty. Anything to plug? Yeah, I'm gonna plug, come see us live. You can see us in San Francisco at Sketchfest. You can see us in New York.

And also, hello for the Magic Tavern. On the podcast I do, it has some live shows in January. We're gonna hit up Charlotte, Atlanta, Portland, Seattle, in San Francisco for Sketchfest. So please come out to those shows. We hope to see you there. And that'll be fun and exciting. JPC, anything to plug?

Fun and exciting, a real double threat. Let's see, this is the 18th. So I would like to plug the Witcher on Netflix. It comes out two days. You know what? Let's all get there together. You know, let's give it the old college try. It's see if old Henry Anvil,

the man who couldn't act his way out of a paper bag, could bring it home for the Witcher series. I hope in the Witcher he reloads his sword, like Hillary loves his arms and air anything to pluge. Follow me, Aaron, keep 10 on Instagram or look up my series, Welcome Back on YouTube, or you can find it on my Instagram too. Also, I had a friend send me a TikTok that a fan of ours made where they like, lip synced along to a part of one of our episodes. And so if any of you are on TikTok,

please do that with one of our episodes and then send it to us. Great. And here and what is TikTok? I don't know. It's a teenage thing where they are like learning to connect and love each other, but also they're destroying each other. If I cannot use it to buy drugs, I do not want to use it. So if we don't know how to use TikTok, we must. But we have teenage listeners who know how or young people. So just like just do a Hey Riddle Rittle TikTok and then send it to us. And if you don't use it, you'll lose it. It will post it on our Instagram. Sound good everybody? Hey, I don't have any complaints with that. Cool. I'm good. Well, this is very gentle. It's

weird when we're all being very normal. Aaron, I have a question for you. Sure. Say then planet that we say at the end of every episode. Jupiter. I just think that's a good idea. Oh, this is a command. I have a reply. Starting, Aaron, David, and John Patrick Collins. Casey Tony to the editing.

Now, are the parents of the music. The vocal created by Emily Cardamus and M.O.N.D. Moron. Boss, you're your hate-wit-wit-wit-jom. the HitGum podcast.