Hey Riddle Riddle - Patreon Preview #241: Reaper's Mansion w/ Dan Lippert & Ryan Rosenberg

Episode Date: October 20, 2023

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Oh, I'm excited for this thing. It's supposed to be scary as shit. Yeah, I read online that it's like the scariest one. I hope so. Because they're making these haunted houses now that are just bull crap. Yeah, I mean, you last year you came home and then you slammed the door and you slammed your hat down and you said, Haunted houses aren't even scary anymore. I know and I'm so sorry for that outburst but it's ridiculous. You come out here, you pay 60 bucks to get terrified and then you go home fine? Yeah, you, I just have a quick question. Have you ever like fully made it through a haunted house though? Because it sort of feels like you get in and then you go, well, this is not scary enough for my taste and then you leave, like.
Starting point is 00:00:48 Yeah, I'm never scared enough that I leave so quick. It's that I'm never scared enough. And it's okay if you are, you could tell me if you were scared and that's what's actually going on. Not even close, not even close. I am so unscared by all this stupid stuff. A scarecrow? It's full of hay. Not scared. Not scared. Not scary. Right. And when we watch scary movies at home, you fall fall asleep right away. And I have to fall asleep clutching you. Right.
Starting point is 00:01:27 Because it's like that just so you know that I'm there to keep you safe. Because I know you get scared. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah, no, it's fine. But like you, just because like, I know my ex-boyfriend was really into scary stuff and he's super brave and I just don't want you feeling like you need to do this if it's not your thing. We talk about your brave ex-boyfriend like a lot. Like I don't want to be annoying but like I'm here at the scariest haunted house in Illinois with you and why are we talking about some other
Starting point is 00:01:59 brave guy? Didn't he like die cliff jumping or something? He died saving people who were cliff jumping. Well very brave, not too smart, I guess, you know? I mean, I don't feel like we talk about Jason that much. Do we? Do we talk about how brave Jason was that? I don't. I don't bring him up that much, but I just feel like he's in our lexicon a lot. And that's fine, it's fine. I just, let's just forget it.
Starting point is 00:02:26 There's going to be fun. Are you two next in line? I'm sorry, are you two next? Yes. Are you a couple? Are you going in together? Yes. Okay.
Starting point is 00:02:33 The Kwanahaus can get pretty scary. So we just checked in with everybody going in together. What you're comfortable with, just so I can radio ahead and let them know kind of how intense to make it. So scale of one to 10, like how scary would ten? Okay, ten. Ten, yeah. Spacest.
Starting point is 00:02:49 Yep. Ten is the scariest. Okay, and just so you know, everyone says ten, but the whole reason why I'm here at the front end again, I'm non-threatening, I'm shorter than both of you, is what I'm here to do is just make sure that you get the experience that you want. Just because we get a lot of people that ask for a 10 and then you know, they come back out afterwards and they're pretty disappointed with with um do you have an 11? Okay um because my boyfriend's so brave here. Yeah yeah the current one. Yeah I am.
Starting point is 00:03:21 Yeah, yeah, the current one. Yeah, I am. Make it full on spicy. Make it habanero. Can they do habanero? They can do habanero. Another part of my job is that I am, I'm really just supposed to encourage certain people that I see and that I flag
Starting point is 00:03:39 to go lower than 10. And, man, I just like to say, if you're a solo experience today I think 10 would be a perfect number for you. Thank you. Yeah, you're badass honey. But we have we just have a flag system that we just like to make it comfortable for everyone so everyone's getting the experience and there's just several things that we notice that kind of result in you know making my job easier if we just go at a lower level. What did you notice? Are you saying that he looks like a coward?
Starting point is 00:04:05 Did you guys flag him as a coward? Nobody has said that yet. No, it's not that and it's nothing. It's just certain markers that we check for before we have people go into it. Like, anyone who's wet their pants in line, we think that the haunted house might be too scary. And I'm not saying that that's exactly what your experience is. Sir, I'm just saying that that is a marker that we check for.
Starting point is 00:04:26 I had a huge slurpee. That was the issue. I had a big big slurpee. Yeah like three days ago. Hey Kyle come on in. You know I saw in the suggestion box from the employees, all the haunters as we like to call them. I saw there's one single suggestion which was written in cursive. We all know you're the only person here over 30 that just said, don't want to be the scarecrow anymore. The suggestion box is anonymous though, right? Yeah, but again, I don't think kids learn cursive in school anymore. I don't think cursive is a thing. I think you're the less breed.
Starting point is 00:05:09 Well, whoever's playing the scarecrow at any given time, probably we should switch it out, and that's just fair. Yeah. For the box. I guess it's not fair if we're reading into things when we read the suggestion box, right? We should just be taking the words that face value. No, no, no, of course, of course. I just know for the past 17 years you've been this scarecrow, and I know you've complained about, I mean, people of, you know, in line have mentioned how is a scarecrow supposed to complain and say, fuck this every 10 seconds? Is a scarecrow supposed to stomp off and get into his dodgy neon and drive home? You know, over the years,
Starting point is 00:05:44 there's just been a lot of signs that maybe you're unhappy with the role, but you are our tallest spooker. What do we, what do we cost? Scare, scare factor. What do we call each other? Hunters. Yeah, I don't even know. It's been so fucking long, man.
Starting point is 00:05:58 I look, I, there was probably a lot of good suggestions in there. That's one just to consider. I mean, I heard people talking to about maybe changing the hay on the scarecrow. So it's a little less itchy. I don't know if that ended up in the box, but I heard there's been a lot of chatter about that stuff. Interesting.
Starting point is 00:06:18 Okay. So people who view this scarecrow think the hay is too itchy. They're just kind of eyeballing it. I'd read the box. I would read the box. I've just heard chatter is what I'm saying and if your note is to make my suggestions more anonymous I can do that which is what I'm getting here I like you you get the coolest job of all you get to hold the chainsaw yes yeah oh can I can I just say the screams the looking people's eyes when I come
Starting point is 00:06:44 from out of nowhere from the parking lot and start chasing them, just I mean, it feels me for the whole year until the next hot, right? Yeah, I can imagine. Now, imagine instead of that, someone walks by and goes, ah, you know my ex-boyfriend used to do this six years ago and it was the saddest job. Oh.
Starting point is 00:07:04 And then you go, it's still me, you know, under your breath and someone hears you and you go, what Mr. Scarecrow and you go, move along. Interesting. I wasn't really under your breath if they could hear you, I guess. Well, listen, Kyle. You showed me under your breath. That showed me under your breath. Oh, yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:07:20 See, you could hear I said something, but maybe I meant Sotovoce. Ooh, dining outside, the Kyle. Here's what I have to say. Again, everyone else is emailing. I, we still have this suggestion box, but it's a bit of a relic. Everybody else emails me at suggestion box at Reapers Mansion.
Starting point is 00:07:42 So I don't know if you want to email to protect your anonymity, but again, I know it's you complaining. I don't want to have to let you go. You are a staple of the community. If you could just find more stillness, I feel like a lot of people complain about the scarecrow dancing. A lot of people complain about the scarecrow doing, sort of TikTok-esque dances around the line.
Starting point is 00:07:59 It just feels like it's more of a, you know, when people sit on their porch and you go to grab a thing of candy from the bowl and then they jump out, that's what it should be. Yeah. Okay. So my job just because it's a full scare, crow costume, real hay, long makeup, five hours early I get here to just jump out when people walk by. Yes, and ideally, ideally, if you're comfortable with it again, I know we did away with it for
Starting point is 00:08:24 two years, you hang on the pole. You put your back on that pole that we have in the ground. Uh-huh. So where you're stuck to the pole kind of there. Oh, okay. Did there been any suggestions about like a set amount of time where someone definitely has to get a raise? Not that I've seen.
Starting point is 00:08:43 So I mean, the turnover is prettyovers pretty you know I think the next closest you've been here 17 years I think the next closest is uh uh three weeks ago play three weeks ago yeah I'm a bit I am a bit of a bit of a I've been here a while what's that called I um tenure I'm a bit ten years and it does feel like I don't get treated that way sure sure well if you want we can give you a year of vacation you know if you want to go on I'm a bit tenured and it does feel like I don't get treated that way. Sure, sure. Well, if you want, we can give you a year of vacation. You know, if you want to go on, what is that called? Runch-pun.
Starting point is 00:09:10 Runch-pun. Runch-pun. Runch-pun. Runch-pun. Runch-pun. Runch-pun. Runch-pun. They get a year to explore other paths and seek knowledge.
Starting point is 00:09:20 It's just, yeah. I mean, what you're kind of talking about is just the year between the end of October and then September next year that we all always take, right? It just feels like I get that year already. Exactly. Exactly. And I look, you and I, when we opened this together, it kind of felt like it was a co-production full of a lot of growth. Would you not agree? I think to start. And when we first day one had the idea, I think ice screamed all-time chainsaw and you said, scarecrow and shrugged?
Starting point is 00:09:55 And I respect you to say it. I just think there's a whole different sprite of things you could have done. Okay. Yeah. But even in your memory, I didn't say all time, scarecrow. It's a very, I feel like, because I don't complain, I get the worst jobs. Like, I have to wash all the pants
Starting point is 00:10:13 that people piss in at the end of the day. And like, refold and steam and press the pants. We give it to people at the front of the line. Kyle, that's a reason we're in business. If we didn't offer that you leave your pants behind, we wash them, steam them, pull them, and deliver them to you, I don't think we'd still be in business. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪
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