Hey Riddle Riddle - Patreon Preview #281: Listener Scene Requests Vol. 3

Episode Date: July 26, 2024

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Comment below why you listen to the show. And I doubt you're going to say it because it's good, conventionally good. Conventionally good. The show is a Boston 8. And here's, let me add to this, because I appreciate this and I agree with this. But to me, I don't want to sit down and have a homemade lasagna every day.

I don't want to go out to a Linea every meal. Sure. Sometimes I want a fucking bag of Doritos. And I think that's what we are. You want a fuck a bag of Doritos? Sometimes, he said sometimes. Aaron, did I say that out loud? Blue or red, blue or red?

Blue or red? Oh, blue. Here's the thing. It's gonna be blue after you're done with it. Sometimes chefs are like, yes, I can make a chicken cordon bleu. Yes, I can sous-vide foie gras. But then they're sitting there and they're like,

what if I dusted a tortilla chip with flavor? And then they do that and they're like, I just made a fucking delicious snack. Is it good for you? No. Is it healthy? No. Is it the best thing I've ever eaten?

No. But sometimes I feel like a fucking Dorito and that's what we are. We're a Dorito. We are 2 a.m. Taco Bell after you've thrown up on the street. Oh, Erin, make this an Alanis Morse song. You're a white castle craved case after the rain. After the rain? That's the most beautiful thing anyone's ever said to me. You're a handjob in a bathroom stall when you're in total pain. In total pain. And isn't it a riddle? Don't you think?

A hey, riddle, riddle. I think that then what we should resolve to do is stop saying that the podcast is bad and be more honest. And I think that we should rebrand, kind of like starting now, as a listenable podcast. No, no. How about a podcast. I don't think that's true. Well Aaron, we can't say that it's bad anymore. We have to be more down the middle. What about bad for you? Okay, the podcast is bad for you. Okay, that's- But with a wiki face. Yeah, because we're not saying- Remember when we got that review where they said we made their

ADHD worse? Yeah, I mean, that's, yeah, that's fair. Okay, so that's fair, but that tracks when the podcast is bad for you. So the podcast is no longer bad. We're not gonna say it's bad anymore. We're just gonna say it's bad for you. Yeah, and then we can't get sued medically. Medically we can't get sued.

And medical debt is out of control in this country. I think we can all agree that medical debt is out of control. With that in mind, since we can't medically get sued anymore and we know the podcast is bad for you, we're going to be encouraging on today's episode people to continue to feed into the part of the podcast that is bad for them by going into the Discord, going into our Scene Ideas channel,

and suggesting any scenes that you would like to see. And today we're going to do some of those on the show. We do this about once a year, so I'm going back into some scene requests that have, well, let's just say they're over six months old and leave it at that. The first one that we have, it comes from MacMacMac. MacMacMac says, and I love, these are so old that I hope that some of these people no longer

are like patrons. I hope that they like came in, you know, a year ago, left their seat request was like, I'm not waiting around. Mack Mack Mack writes, you're all in a conga line at a wedding. And the person at the front has curved the line to meet the back, creating a loop with no end. Somehow, a person whose username is Mack Mack Mack suggesting a conga line really sinks up for some reason. Yeah, I agree. Do you think this person's just kind of going into any discord that they can find and

however it is appropriate to suggest a conga line, they're like kind of just doing it in there? That makes sense. Sorry, sorry if my hands are getting sweaty or slippery. I'm... What's been going on? Ryder groomside! Oh, I'm... Technically neither. I'm a-

Huh? I'm a waiter, but I don't know if you remember the beginning of the conga line, there weren't too many people getting up here, and so I think one of the groomsmen told me to, you know, kind of help out and yeah, I'm a, I'm a waiter. Okay.

Yeah, sorry, sorry. And again, sorry about my hands. They usually, we're usually wearing gloves. We're usually wearing gloves and. Your hands are soaking wet. Well, I was washing dishes earlier tonight, but this isn't dishwasher. This is sweat.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry, yes, I'm sorry. You could have gotten away with it. You could have just said it was from washing dishes. Well, then, I mean, dishwater, I don't feel like, is any better. And then, like, there's, you would probably ask, like, why are they still wet? Why are you in a suit?

Okay, so this is, this is not on me. The company that hired me, this is our uniform. It's green-like plaid suits with dark green plaid ties. This is also with the groomsmen. Same as the groomsmen, yeah. Yeah, but I don't know, we wear this because they were like, no one would wear this to a wedding, so I don't know why.

It's just a company, it's just, yeah. That's why, I don't know if the groomsmen thought I was another one of the groomsmen probably right. Oh, thank you guys all for giving speeches. I guess there's I guess there's one groomsmen left And if it isn't um, ooh, I'm a little hungover. I can't remember his name. Here's the mic, buddy. Oh Same. Here's the mic, buddy. Oh. Um. Wow, what a wonderful ceremony. Another round of applause for the two people that got married.

Um. Wow. And the food, huh? How about the food? Crab dip with those little mini tortillas. That's so good. It's so good, right? Woo! Really focusing on the food. Talk about how we know each other.

Chicken planks with the little chopped up avocado pieces. That's pretty great, huh? Speech! Speech! Um, well, I've known one of the people up here a whole heck of a lot of time. We go way back to when they signed a contract to float me the money for my first business venture, food prep, ugh. So that was you earlier making that speech? That was so weird, that speech. Well, I don't know why I kept trying to give the mic back

and you kept pushing it into my hands. I mean, the end of it was beautiful. Everyone ended up crying, but. That was from, that was from, You've Got Mail. I just did the end speech to You've Got Mail. And let's see that. Erin, it's been great chatting with you.

I just gotta say, you're really animated today. Thank you, Addle. It's a little much. I, I, I... I know what's happening. Oh. I mean, Erin, have you been watching Anna Mayhem on Hulu?

Hulu Anna Mayhem is your animation destination to watch full seasons and new episodes of your favorite animated shows Have I zorp falls through a trapdoor lands right back in the same spot. I was standing I guess he has a little weird when Aaron does it but I love when Hulu does it JPC I don't know if you've been watching like Bob's Burgers, which is incredible. Love Bob's Burgers. Futurama, which is a classic. Ooh. Hit Monkey, the Monkey Assassin, played by Jason Sudeikis.

American Dad, I mean, tons of animated shows are on Hulu, anime-hem. And it seems like Aaron from, I mean, your eclectic bunch of animated features that you're kind of, you're kind of inhabiting all of them. Aruga, my eyes pop out of my head. Whoa, I think you could be right. Aruga, that doesn't make sense.

Is that Brian? Is that Family Guy? What is she doing? Is that Brian? I don't know, but eyes popping out of her head isn't necessarily the freshest bit, but Eren, there are some of the freshest animated series on Hulu right now, like the Great North, Grimsburg, Krapopolis.

Sort of a fun Greek mythological world and the guy from, uh, what we do in the shadows, Matthew Berry plays in some of them. Oh, I love Matthew Berry. Oh, he's so good. He's so good. I bonked my head and there's a bunch of birds flying around it. Whoa. Well, I know Erin probably isn't, but if you're looking for your favorite animated shows, there's only one destination you need to remember.

That's Hulu Animaheim, your animation destination, now streaming on Hulu. Run through the wall. Perfect shape of me in the wall. I'm actually really hurt. Is the bone sticking out? Yeah, guys, help. Let's watch some Hula. And I guess when I got that email,

it wasn't just that I had mail. It was that I had mail friends for the first time in my life. That's beautiful. Bravo. That's beautiful. Bravo. That's beautiful. I mean, my name is Ryan Meg, so you messed up that- you inverted my-

besides that, flawless. Yeah, it's been like 20 years since I've seen that movie too, so I may have not gotten it picture-like-word perfect. Um, god, this- this comic line's been going on for like, a long time, right? Yeah, I feel kind of dizzy. Oh, I don't want to put pressure on you because you're a stranger.

And I've got to say, I've kind of completely ruined your dress with my head sweat. I really apologize. But if you were to like pass out, or even just fake pass out, I'd catch you. And I promise no slippies, I'd catch you and I promise no slippies. I'd catch you and then maybe we could stop stop the conga line. You know what I'm saying? Because I feel like it's just I can't even see where it ends and

where it begins and every time I try to turn my head back the guy behind me keeps pushing it to be like straightforward. I don't know what his deal is. Oh yeah he's uh that's the father of the bride. He's a little intense. He's probably mad about, he's probably mad about the speech that I had to give for the bride as well, which I don't know why they made me give two speeches. Yeah, probably.

That was really crazy. Yeah. You know, there's no greater sin at a wedding than stopping the conga line. So like, I'm not going to be the one to do it. Oh, I've, oh, that can't be true, right? I've sinned way worse at weddings. What? No, no, it's the worst possible thing you can do.

No, I think the worst possible thing you can do is forget your gloves, even though you know you have a condition where your hands are gonna be really, really sweaty and you're still handing out food to everyone at the wedding. And then later you hear that everyone at that wedding got pink eye.

What? It's not what you think. There's like many different ways to get pink eye. I touched a cow that had it. You can get pink eye from touching a cow that has it. It's not necessarily like truly one of the worst moments of my life. My hips are soaking wet from your hands. Yes, right here.

That's where I know you do shoulders keep moving. Oh no, you do shoulders. Well, I've been moving up, but I've been doing shoulders, and now I'm looking down the back of your dress, which, either way, I never would do until you mentioned hips. That's the only reason why I'm looking down here, and I do see that the sweat has trickled down. Oh my god, it's so gross. But you have, may I say, a banging figure. Thank you. And I've banged a lot of people at weddings.

Oh my God, scene. Wow. I think the last time I was in a conga line, at all, was your wedding. Have, has there ever been a conga line that got loose? Like outside of- Got loose! Like down the sidewalk, middle of the street. It's scary. There's like a helicopter circling it.

There's a sheep dog trying to wrangle them so they don't get hit by a car. 1, 2, 3, 4, Hey Riddle Riddle's Clue Crew! Listen to the rest of the episode now by starting your free 7 day trial at patreon.com slash hey riddle riddle.