Higher Learning with Van Lathan and Rachel Lindsay - Live from New York, It’s Higher Learning!

Episode Date: May 14, 2025

Van and Rachel took to New York’s Gramercy Theater in front of a lively audience to discuss the old guard of the Democratic Party, after David Hogg’s “get over yourself” comment (12:57). Then Van debuts a new spinoff, “Glaze of the Decade” (29:37), before thought warriors join the show for Animal Games (54:38) and a Rachel Apology Contest (1:12:07). Hosts: Van Lathan Jr. and Rachel Lindsay Producers: Donnie Beacham Jr. and Ashleigh Smith  Additional Production Support: Chelsea Stark-Jones Live Events Coordination: Elizabeth Fierman, Helen Eichner, Tessa Herrick Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's up, everybody? Okay, guys, I don't want to start the podcast on a down note. I don't want to. But... But you guys have been seeing in the news. It's still open season on Black Men in America. We're not doing this. And it's sad.

So before we get the podcast started, I just want us all to bow our heads and have a moment of silence for Didi and Tori Lanes. Okay. Please feel free to boo at this one. moment. Thank you. Thank you. Wait, wait. I didn't tell you this though. Wait, wait, wait, I didn't tell you. On the way over here, so we're so excited to be here, guys. Thank you so much for being here. This is so exciting. I brought my grill out. That's how you know I'm excited. But on the way over here, and with my girl, Kimmy, shout out to Kimmy, we're walking out the elevator

and who do I run into right at the entrance? Just take a guess. Did he? Shannon Shark I would have ran for the hills 25,000 and Shire. Diddy's entire family. Oh wow. They're staying at the hotel.

Don't follow me on the way back home. Kids, mom, bodyguard, everybody. Christian wasn't there. What did you say to them? I didn't say anything. I got nervous. They didn't look happy.

They looked, they were very solemn. I mean, obviously, Can you imagine we saw the headlines of what came out today? Like, I can't even imagine being a child and seeing that kind of stuff. So this is the thing. If you see them, I feel like you got to take the moment to make some type of impact. What? Okay. Let's roll.

Let's play this out. Right. You come off the elevator. You're on your way here to see you wonderful, beautiful people. And you see Diddy's entire family. What do you do? Okay, so you got two choices. Because I'm going to tell you what we did.

One is you play it. I play Uncle Roe. Uncle Role, right? I become Uncle Van. Something happened on the basketball court where I shot the ball and it went in and his little nigga went

because shot old school. I was like, what? So I've been getting to my uncle. If I'm Uncle, then I go, hey, you youngsters keep y'all heads up, okay? It's raining today but it will be sunny tomorrow.

But if I'm being the old van, I look at them, I go, Y'all niggas fucked. I hope he put that money in the trust. Or all y'all gonna be on Holy Fans. We didn't do either one of those things. Didn't do that. We looked at them.

I made eye contact and then I got nervous. And I got so nervous, I just went to the bar and took a shot. See, that's the thing. You let them make you and I'm calling. They got the problems. I felt bad for them. I looked the daughters in the face. I felt bad.

It's just so sad. Now we can have the moment of silence. They could have told somebody. Look. Welcome to higher learning guys. So look, but... So here's the deal. People accuse me, because, you know, I knew Puff and whatever.

People accused me, but I really didn't know anything. The only thing I knew is that it was weird. Like, I went to Puff's house one time. Okay, so... That's what I was going to say. When you say you knew Puff, you need to tell them how. No, judge him. Judge him.

When you say you knew Puff. Puff, how did you know Puff? So this is what happened. The whole Kanye thing happened, right? And I get a call. No call ID. I pick up the call. Yo, what's up?

What's up with you, nigga? What fuck is this? Yo, it's Puff. I'm like, oh, my God. I'm on. I'm about to be a Ciroc boy. I'm getting off the plane in Vegas. And so he's like, yeah, I want to offer you a job

and all of that stuff. And I'm like, cool. Okay. So then he invites me out to the house. So the house on Mapleton, the ground zero. And so I go, right? Tell everyone I, yo, man, we're going to Puff House. Yeah, I'm saying, whatever, whatever.

So I go out there and I get there, and this was when I knew that, like, something was up. I haven't heard this part. You haven't heard this party? No. So something was up. So I see this guy that I know because you get there. Puff didn't have the Floyd Mayweather six foot seven. 350-pound bodyguards.

Nah, this nigga had Russian contract killers. So, like, you get to the front door and it's like, a Sergei will invite you into the house or something like that. Did you get there? You're here to meet Mr. Combs? Okay, you stand right there. Okay, don't fucking move.

And so I get there to the front, I get let in, and then I'm nervous. I'm actually nervous. I've driven over from TMZ. I'm not really supposed to be doing this soliciting other jobs while I'm still under contract with Satan and all of that stuff. Well, you didn't say that part. So he was interested in you. He was trying to get me to come run content at Revolt.

Okay. Right? And so I go over to this crib and I see a guy that I know. Who? So this is a guy that was on the real world for a long time. His name is Adam. And his dad was in the Commodore. And so y'all know that guy?

Like his dad was in the Commodores. And I see him. Oh, yeah. And I used to see Adam around the town. And me and Adam would pal around and drink and stuff like that. I'm like, oh, shit. Oh, my God. It's so good to see somebody.

I know Adam's doing like the whole thing. It's cooling or whatever we're chilling. And I'm like, hey, it's great. He's like, it'll be cool. He's a great guy. You'll love him. Cool. We're just talking regularly.

So I go down there and I sit down and I'm talking to Puff. Puff actually gives me a cool. quiz on black people. What do you mean? So Puff is vetting me for the job. Okay. So I'm sitting down there. I'm across from him and he goes,

yeah, you did your thing with Kanye. That was powerful black man. But there's some people that might think you've been in the bubble over there. Maybe you're not keeping up with the culture. I'm like, it's my job to keep up with the coach. I'm the only nigger they got. And he goes, yeah, that might be true.

But yo, who signed Nas? I'm like, what? He's like, who signed Nas? I was like, MC Sur. She's like, yeah, black man, yeah, King. Wait, did this really happen? I swear on that. And he goes, name three artists that's on QC.

I'm like, nigga, you're dead ass right now? And I'm like, yeah, I'm like, Migos, a little baby, the city girls. He's like, oh, okay, you really tapped in. So I'm cool, that's cool. I'm like, this nigga is quizzing me. What the fuck is going on? Adam walks over, and the Adam that I met at the front door is gone. That nigga is gone.

He comes over, he's like, hello, chairman. Is there anything I can bring you? I'm like, he's like, puff, it doesn't ask for no sir rock. He goes, yeah, I'll take a chamomile tea, okay, light, light honey. And I mean light. It better not be too sweet. He goes, thank you very much, chairman. I'll get on that right away.

Mr. Lathen, is there something? I don't want nothing. And I started to look around. And when I started to look around the house, I saw a lot of people like smiling and bowing to Puff. And it was, y'all think I'm bullshit. But I was like, I called Charlemagne. I was like, yo, this nigga Puff got these motherfuckers on lock.

And the next time I met with him, I was like, I don't want to meet at your house. Wait, wait, wait, wait. You went back? That wasn't my last time at the house You're one of them You're one of them You're part of it Oh I went to a party at look

I could tell you the story Oh I went to a party at the house That's right That's right Judge away All I'm saying is I didn't see anything I would have told somebody Oh hold on

Before we get going First of all I got to show you out The hair transplant real quick There you go Can we get a spotlight? Spotlight on the hair transplant So look I don't know if you guys

been listening to the podcast lately, but I've become the world's foremost expert on many things. Rachel? What? You're your chance to be supportive of a black man publicly. I always support you. You do. I do as your co-host. Go ahead and tell them, you have a new title.

Yeah, I'm the world's foremost expert on hailing cabs. So, I love my New Yorkers, but I noticed something that you guys are doing wrong when you hail the cab. You guys are very, aggressive, right? You're aggressive.

You got to be when you're hailing the cab. So I see the New Yorkers hell in the cab and it's like, hey, I'm walking here, stop, you know? Fuck out of here, capice. And... Like, nobody talks like...

Do y'all talk like that? Do y'all say, capice? I'll watch your movies. That's the second time that's happened today, though, by the way. But go ahead. Zero support. I'm telling you, this is what Paul Pierce was talking about. So I decided that I would come up with a way to hail the cab that was cabby friendly.

All right. That put the cabby first. Because I think about these guys, you know, they're driving around Manhattan. They got ice asylum claims that they're worried about and different types of things that are going on. Okay. So I'm going to heal the cab with some flair and in a way that entertains them. So I came up with a technique called the Step Through follow-through. By all means, please show us.

And as New Yorkers, I want you to judge these skills, and if this would work or not. Go ahead. No, Rachel can't do it. I don't want to. Rachel's a North Dallas, North Dallas princess. Okay, this is what you do. So the cab is coming down there.

It's got the light on, right? You see the cab, and this is what you do. Got it. Van, you literally look like a temptation. Just one more time. So this leg moves first, and you pivot, you step two, and you follow through. I'll do it one more time for you guys.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Now, would that work? So let me tell y'all something. No. Let's move on. Because we can move on and start the podcast, but y'all don't have to be with her the whole time. Van, it's so obvious.

You literally, can I get the count again? I'm not doing it anymore. And one, two, three. I don't want to do it. You're literally on, on beat. Your Beyonce on beat with that. No, I don't want to show it anymore. And they don't want to see it.

Let's go. The playoffs are here, and you can predict the action all the way to the finals with Fandul predicts. Predict the spread, total points, and even the game winner. Sign up and get a $25 bonus. Offered by Fandul prediction markets LLC, a registered futures commission merchant, 18 plus. Bonus is non-withdrawable and expire seven days after receipt. Trading derivatives involve significant risk and may not be suitable for all investors. Manage your activity with our consumer protection tool.

Restrictions apply. See terms at Fandul.com slash predict slash bonus dash offer dash term. For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters. Trimphia offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Trimphia is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks. If your doctor decides that you can self-inject trumphia, proper training is required. Trimphia is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to six.

severely active Crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis. Serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur. Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine. Explore what's possible. Ask your doctor about Tramphia today. Call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more or visit Trimfair Radio.com. Let's get it to the big deal of the day. Big deal of the day. Oh, we forgot one point.

What? Yo, yo, thought warriors. What is up? Harylora is on is Ivan Lathen Jr. And it's me, Rachel and Lindsay. All right, let's get to the big deal of the day. Let's talk about these goddamn Democrats. Donnie, give us the sound.

Donnie is here. Yes. Donnie's here. Donnie's here. Donnie talk to the people. Is Donnie might? Oh, they don't give a fuck about you. Sweet booty.

Sweet booty beat them. Now Donnie's never going to come out. He can't come out to sweet booty. All right, so there's a, I'll cue in. So there's a talk amongst the Democrats, the party that we have to have our faith in, about whether or not the old guard of the Democrats are doing a sufficient enough job

or whether or not they need to be jettisoned for a new group to come in. kind of reached a boiling point when David Hawke, who you guys might know from his activism following the Parkland shootings, who is now, I guess, the co-chair or the vice chair. He's the vice chair of the DNC. The vice chair of the DNC. Same to directly call out Jim Clyburn of South Carolina, who is 84 and a very tenured and respected congressman.

He called him out. And this is what he said on Bill Maher's. real time with Bill Marshall. Check it out. There have been a few members that have come out that have said, well, you know, if I retire, my life is effectively over. And what I would say is get over yourself. This isn't about you. This is about our country and it's about your constituents. Nobody isn't, I don't care if you've been there for decades or just one term. That seat is not yours. It is your constituents. That is who you're there to serve.

And if they choose to serve somebody else, so be it. That's all what all we're trying to do with leaders we deserve is give people the option to vote for somebody that isn't necessarily. the same person that's been different. Okay. So, Bacari Sellers, who we've had, friend of the podcast. Friend of the podcast, you lie to us, Baccarre. Bacari Sellers, friend of the podcast, responded to this on Twitter.

Yeah. And the gist of it was that David Hogg... I have the tweet. Read it. I have a tweet. So Bacari Sellers gets on X and says, I like at David Hogg. Don't know David, but the audacity to tell, and he adds Clivearn,

to get over himself is wild. Right. So I reached out to Bacari about this, and I talked to him about it, and the gist of what, I'm really interested in to see what you guys think about this. The gist of Bacari's retort was that, sure, there needs to be some type of movement at the top of the Democratic Party. However, he is uncomfortable with David Hogg speaking to and about Rep Clyburn like that because he is a black elder. How do you feel about that?

You think it's disrespect. Wait, show of hands if you think it's disrespectful what David Hogg had to say. Sister said it depends. I want to hear what you got to say. I didn't hear her name. That is my soror, Aaron Campbell over here. Nobody cares about that devil worship and shit. I'm sick of this.

But wait, can I just say this just for context purposes? Why do we say he was specifically calling out him and not just every elder member who has held a seat for too long in the Democratic Party? I think that the specificity of what Hawk said being that if we retire our lives of over or our lives are over or whatever

I think that is directly something that relates to something that Rep Clyburn said. Okay. So he's, for most people that understand the full, holistically what they're talking about. They assume that he's talking about him. So this is the deal, and this is my whole thing. So most people agree with David, just by the way.

You agree with what David Hawke had to say. All right. So look, this is what I would say. So the way he said it, I heard someone say that. You don't like the way that he said it. All right, so this is my thing. I'm from Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Let me tell you what the stakes are in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

What the stakes are in Alabama, what the stakes are in other places. The stakes aren't tax codes. They're not, even things that are more amorphous, like, you know, changes to voting rights and rolling things back. The stakes are the justice and health of your body. So we were moving to use the Biden administration's environmental justice initiative to change the standard of the drinking water, Gardier, where I'm from,

there's a shit plant. We wake up and we smell the shit. And that kind of stuff gets into the water. I've talked before about a friend of my name Eddie Murphy, that was his name. He died of, his parents just was like, fuck it, we're going to fucking confuse this little nigger. And he died of throat cancer.

That's not so funny. Now you feel bad. When he was 15 years old, cancer is very prevalent where I'm from, and we need someone and something to care about the environmental standards that black people live under in these places. So when the Democrats fucking lose,

what happens is the Republicans come in for whatever reason, they outwardly go, we don't care if y'all drink shit. Happened in Alabama, happening Louisiana, all over the place. So when I'm hard on the Democrats, it's because I don't look at the battle between political parties as something that makes either party beyond reproach or criticism.

I look at it as something that directly affects people's lives. So their incompetence means that the people where I'm going, from die slow, painful, agonizing deaths because we need someone that have the political will and the political incentive to change

things. So when these niggas lose, we die. If that means that Clyburn got to fucking get out of the Congress, then I don't fucking care. There's no one

and respect to him and respect to Ms. McMan I wouldn't even call her rep Maxine. That's my elder, Ms. Maxine. Respect to all of them that have done so much. But I got to be honest, I care more about those people. Yeah.

My people that are down there than I do about the careers of people that have been there since gone with the wind was in theaters. But that's the problem. In all respect to Baccaria Sellers, we said he's a friend of the podcast, but that type of gatekeeping is exactly the problem with the Democrats

that we keep talking about. On this podcast, we keep saying, like, we need change, we need something that's fresh, we need something that's new. And when I listen to David Hogg, what he said here and what he said in the rest of that interview with Bill Maher or just even outside of it, that's exactly what he's trying to do. As the vice chair, I was like, what is the role of the vice chair of the DNC? I'm not sure even I even know what the DNC really does outside of title.

And part of what he's supposed to do is look, it policy and strategy and analyze it and how we can change it. And that's exactly what he's doing. And when you get pushback from people who care more about hurting the feelings of the people who've been in office for a long time, it doesn't mean that we're not acknowledging their legacy or the work they've done. But we're saying, look what happened in this last election. We need something new. And the way things are working right now is it is, it's two parties at this point. So why not work within the party and figure out how it is that we can change it and make it more reflective of what people want? I don't understand why somebody like Bacari Sellers, who has such a big platform and a big voice is pushing against that to protect the feelings of Claburn in this instance.

That's exactly what's happening. Give it up for that. And like, you know, at this point, Baccari should be a rep Clyburn. He should be the guy in South Carolina. Yeah, that's a really good point. fresh and new and young and lies to us. And, like, he should be, Bacari came on the, boy, Bacari came on

the Election Day live stream. Don't throw, don't do that to Bacari. Don't do that. Baccari made me feel like I was the dumbest nigger in the world. I'm watching the way the shit is going and I'm like, well, you can cancel Christmas, motherfuckers.

This is bad Baccarry said, Hey! The fuck up, idiot. It's going to be a red wave, a blue wave that's coming. He did save it. He was very dismissive of us. You don't have the analytics that I have. You haven't talked to the people that I've talked to.

You don't know the pollsters I know. You have no clue what's going to happen. He's going to be so mad at you for this. You don't know. Dummy! So, of course, I do what I do is I listen to somebody smarter than I pretend like I said, that shit.

So when people call me, I'm like, hey, stupid, you haven't talked to the pollsters I've talked to. Jamal. And then these niggas called me about 6.30 the next morning. Yo, what happened to them

pulses, Nick? So, but look, like, for me, you know, you guys listen to us talk, and sometimes it seems like we are hard on the party that we caucus with.

Sure. Like that we in some way are trying to subvert the democratic agenda or what the Democrats have going on. It's not that, despite what the Reddit says, okay? The stakes are just very high, right? Yeah. The stakes are very high. So the stakes are so high that sometimes I'm like, I get a little frustrated.

Well, I think it's just about holding people accountable. And that's what it is. And I think it's frustrating when you see headlines. that are trying to trash David Hogg and are saying, oh, he's trying to uproot the party or he's taking the party down. What all he's doing is literally saying what we say on this podcast. All he's doing is literally asking people to be accountable for the positions that they hold, to represent what their constituents want, and that's what we elect you for.

And he's saying, if you don't do that and you just sit in that chair to hold the title and status and whatever it may be, then you've got to do that. get out and that's what we want. And he's not running for office, but they're low-key trying to push him out of even being, holding the position that he has right now in the D.A. Now here's the thing. I've got to be honest about this.

It's tough to hear from a white boy. Makes me think of something. Wait, what's tough for you to hear? Because you feel like you should, the person who's saying this should look different? I'm not saying that they should look like anything. I'm talking about how they do look. Okay.

So I think about a situation that happened in Louisiana Tech University in the year 2000. It's me, it's Ryan. A girl named Kalina. The way you remember people. Her name was, there was two girls. I remember the second girl because Kalina had a friend named Jolita. And Jolita, this was when I realized that it wasn't going good for me in life. Because Ryan was with Kalina.

And I was like, you know, Jolita gonna be down. And y'all ever seen one of those videos from, like, Carnival, where a guy tries to dance on a girl? And then she looks back, that happened to me. So she was dancing. I got by, she was, she started laughing, and I felt like the only man on planet Earth. It was like, all of a sudden, mystical stopped playing.

It was like, or it was playing in the soul motion, shake it fast. Watch it. yourself. Anyway, we're all in the room, and this was the first time anyone had ever said this out loud where I could hear it. It was me, Ryan, Bean, A.D. Vito, Quentin,

and his white boy that lived on our floor named Jensen. And Jensen was from Anchorage, Alaska. Yeah, so Jensen would, he would be like, yeah, Anchorage is the biggest city in Alaska. We call it Lost Anchorage. I'm like, that shit not funny, dog. And so Jensen says, we're talking about something, and Jensen goes, yeah, well, you know,

black women, by all metrics, have it significantly harder than any other segment of the population. If you look at all the things you're talking about, when you're really talking about the advancing of black people, if you look at it and you break it down, it's actually the advancement of black men because when you're talking about black women and all of a sudden, Kalina and Jolita go,

and we've never thought about this before. We've never considered this. Of course you didn't. So we like, nigger, that shit ain't true. And he says this, and he's literally spitting. And I'm thinking, I'm not trying to hear that shit from you.

White man? So I think that's the thing with David Hogg. For this one, Bacari, he's got to let this happen. He's got to let this go. We have to get the old people out. Man, if you watched I Love Lucy in first run, you can't be in Congress. I swear to God, if you were watching TV before Good Times came out. Come on.

My nigger. No, that makes more sense than I was. You were watching TV and it was like, there's this brand new show that's going to drop Friday nights on Fox. Sanford and Son. Watch the crazy hijinks. You can't be in Congress no more.

What's the year? What's the cutoff? What's the cutoff of when, because you couldn't, you couldn't have watched Good Times. Right. You couldn't have watched San Francisco. But you couldn't have been there at first run.

But you couldn't have been an adult when that shit came out. Like, you couldn't have been talking about your coworkers about good times. So what I'm saying is this is like, but I get you. They cut off air traffic. Controllers, shout out to y'all flying out of Newark. They cut off air traffic controllers at 56 because it's a very important job. Oh, do they really?

Yeah. See, this shit I'm talking about. Oh, you're an expert in this too. Van Lathen, air traffic control expert. But they let you make laws about people until you croak on the job. Sure. Obama asked Ruth Barry Ginsburg, he was like, Ruth. Like, we fuck with you.

We gave you a nickname. Because you retire so that we don't have to do back alley abortions. And Ruth was like, no. And she died. So what I'm saying is we can't baby these old niggas. I agree. I agree. I agree.

This episode is brought to you by Spectrum Business. Fast, reliable internet means everything for your business. And even this podcast, that's why I trust Spectrum Business. It keep companies of all sizes connected with Internet. advanced Wi-Fi, phone, TV, mobile services, plus 24-7 U.S.-based support, millions of business owners already trust Spectrum business. So visit Spectrum.com slash business to learn more. Restrictions apply. Service is not available in all areas. For adults with Crohn's disease or ulcerative colitis symptoms, every choice matters.

Tramphaya offers self-injection or intravenous infusion from the start. Tramphia is administered as injections under the skin or infusions through a vein every four weeks, followed by injections under the skin every four or eight weeks. If your doctor decides that you can self-inject trumphia, proper training is required. Tramphia is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with moderately to severely active Crohn's disease and adults with moderately to severely active ulcerative colitis. Serious allergic reactions, increased risk of infections, or lower ability to fight them, and liver problems may occur.

Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection, flu-like symptoms, or need a vaccine. Explore what's possible. Ask your doctor about Tramphia today. Call 1-800-526-7736 to learn more or visit Tramphia Radio.com. Donnie? So there's a new segment that we've been doing on higher learning. It's called Glaze of the Week.

Guys. Now, we wanted to do that segment for. you guys tonight, but here's the deal. We can't do glaze of the week because this is two moments as of an occasion. So we have to do glazes of the decade. We're going to do a glaze of the year

for every year in these 2020s. Okay? Also honoring the five years we've been doing this podcast. So this is our five year, this is our five year anniversary this month. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you all. Thank y'all. Thank y'all. Thank y'all.

Glaze of the year. Glaze of the year. I bet you didn't hear. You're the glaze of the year. Glaze of the year. Glaze of the year. You're getting tears from sucking dick. All right.

Glaze of the year, 20 turn. We had to. You had to Nothing has changed Nothing has changed Now the whole fucking world is on fire This nigga back here has a picture of George

Rest in peace George Floyd The whole fuck Nancy don't even have her mask on Because she wants people to know that's her Right So the whole world is on fire And the Democrats were like You know what? There's legislation we could do

Yeah There's emergency funds that we could appropriate, but that's not what these niggas need. No. They need us to take a knee in dashiki. I'll be honest with you. If the dashiki wouldn't have been up there, I might have let these niggas slot.

It's not the dashiki. What is it? It's the kinti claw. Oh, it's kente? It's the kinti claw. Shout out to my Africans. Where y'all at? Might be too many. Has we?

Have we discovered whose idea this was yet? Who do you think came up with this? Probably Baccarre. No, it's a joke. Tell us who Baccarre like that. It was Jim. It was probably Jim. It was probably Jim.

Look at Jim. Jim like, Jim's like, I would be remembered forever for this. All right. Now look, this was a terrible, crazy glaze. But little did we know that a short couple of months later, this glaze would be overdone by a whole thing. whole group of people, Donnie. Look at these white people.

Look at the front center. Look at his nigga in the front. Look at this nigga in the front. Like, look at him in the front. They're taking our country. So Trump was able to make these morons believe that, you know, the government was being taken over because they lost an election.

And so then they popped up here and decided they need to take over the world. And God rest of the soul, one of them had to die. That is now getting $30 million. This is one of the biggest glazes of ever. This started the Republican glazed fest that we still see. Can I push back on this? You know who are bigger glazers that kind of came about from this? Are the people who, when this happened, people were kind of in unity as far as.

You mean the Republicans? And then Kevin McCarthy. Yeah, they were like, you know what? This is wrong. This is an injustice. We were like, wow, they get it. They understand the common sense. And then they agreed with it.

They're the bigger glazers, in my opinion, with January 6th than the people who storm the Capitol. Because they legitimize them. So hold on for a second. Before we, are there, just for fun. Are there any conservatives in the house? I just want to know. Don't be afraid.

You don't have to be scared It's okay It doesn't mean you're MAGA If y'all are here I just want to see my nigger back there I see you We got one we got one hand We got one brave soul

You're a conservative You're conservative? Oh Hey No no no You're probably not alone You're probably not alone You're probably

Vance sit down Vance sit down Don't let them bully you Okay Hey stand up Stand up real quick So I'm talking about, look at him. Hey.

What's your name? What? Terrence. Terrence. Terrence. Terrence. Terrence. You're fiscally conservative.

What don't you want to spend money on? You think the government's wasteful. All right, so I'm going to name some things you tell me whether or not the government's wasteful with these things. Snap. Hey, brother, don't you do this. Hey, my nigger. Hey, look at me.

Look at me. Look at me. I did this for nine years at TMZ. You're going to feel so fucking bad. Don't do it. Let Terrence. Let Terrence. Yeah.

Thank you. I don't like the whole fucking rhythm right there. So, Terrence, okay, so snap. You don't like it. Niggas don't need no food. Cool. Terrence, what about the military? Okay, give it up for Terran.

He's not wrong. He's not wrong. You redeemed yourself a little bit. Terrence, what about Medicaid? Listen to what he has to say. Let's hear Terrence out. So last question I'm going to ask you. The government should have no part in health care

should be universal rights. So then you're for single parent health care. You think that health care is a human right, as is housing. Okay. So, so as is housing. No, fan, we're not doing squatters. We're not doing the squatters conversation.

We're not doing it. Don't try to loop it in. As is housing. No. So, Terrence, what do you do, by the way? Thank you, Terrence. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

Thank you so much. Brave soul, a brave soul. Very brave. Shall we move on in 2022? Oh, yeah. You don't want the squatters conversation. Don't do that. 2022.

Yeah. So that's Kanye West. So Kanye West decided in 2022 to set a new fucking standard in glazing. He decided to glaze the unglazable. Adolf Hitler. This is Kanye saying that he likes Hitler, which was really the last thing that the nigger could say. Now he's gone even further.

He dropped that Heil Hitler. And I know that there's at least some of you here who listened to it and enjoyed it. I just want to let you guys know that if you like that song, You know. All right, so that's Kanye. So 2020, 2023. Y'all, you know you're wrong for laughing. You know you are wrong for laughing.

Okay. It's a little too much noise. That's the moment of silence you should have asked for. It's a little too much noise. So let me make the point. Let me make the point. Let me make the point here. So imagine that somebody comes to you and they say,

hey, we want to take you down to the depths of the ocean. We ain't got no backup plan. We got an Xbox controller. No backup oxygen. No real radar. No nothing. If you go down there, you're on that nigger dick.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry, this is a glaze, and this was the clays that really cost people. This shows the delusion of when you have too much money. Yeah. Like, they thought their money would keep them afloat. They thought their money would save them. They thought they were invincible. And within what, 17 seconds? It was a different story. Now, this is what I'm saying. And it's,

I'm not trying to say it to be funny. It's just, it just shows you how wrapped up in your own world you can be where you didn't ask the simple questions that you just said. I mean, before, like, I've been all, everywhere I go. Look at it. Like, I was in. The site alone. So I was in club playhouse in Miami, which is a strip club in Miami Gardens. And they were like, hey, we're going to take the boat out the next day. I was drunk. I was down like a bottle of tequila. I was throwing it all over the place.

People were looking at me like, who's the guy with the cowboy hat? And they were like, we're going to get on the boat the next day. And I asked, the first thing I said was, what could go wrong? That's the question I asked before anything. And if you don't ask the question, what could go wrong, especially in some shit when you going down to the bottom of the ocean. You're on the nigger dick. I'm sorry. Next one. 2024. Okay, now let me tell you. I don't know about this.

Let me tell you what this is. This is actually for y'all. Because this is a battle between two rappers, okay, one white and one black. Ask how many people are Drake or Kendrick. Let's figure out what we're dealing with right here. First of all, I'm not sure. I fuck with Drake. Okay, I like Drake. You're a big Drake fan? Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on, first of all, there's nothing wrong with being a Drake fan, but hold on, I need you to say a couple more sentences. Introduce yourself to me. You're Canadian. Oh, I was about to say.

Where are you from, Scott? Yeah. Philly? A hour north of Philly. Like, what's the name of the town? He's from the Lehigh Valley. Oh, Allen Town. Okay, so, so you're a Drake fan. So, look, that's fine. during this entire battle, you couldn't talk critically about the battle

because this was really about glazing. Who? Or just the battle itself? The battle itself was between two rappers who have been in contention for biggest artists of their generation for rap. And this guy was going at this guy,

this guy was going at that guy, whatever. And really, we should have been able to talk about this and just be like, I like this record, like this line, but the fandom took this over so much that it became a real contest of which fan group could have the most glaze on their face and still be able to talk. So I looked at this, this was a whole glazing session. We can't think critically about things anymore, but you disagree with this one. But are we guilty of it because we talked about it so much on the podcast, did we not? We were right there in it. We had it in our faces. I think, I think, I think,

think we're guilty of it. Probably. Listen. I went to the pop out. I definitely have it on me. Yeah, so I didn't go. But you got a ticket. I got you the tickets. So look, I think that

Kendrick Lamar won this back and forth, right? I do. Hands down. But I do think, I do think that Drake is still a fantastic, prolific artist with a ton of talent. Oh, because you're heavy on that Nokia.

No, no. I, like, I'll, like Nokia. Like, I'm fucking with that shit. So I don't think, you can't support me even. What? Laze. Do that again for the people. They like that shit.

My boy, I'm telling you, these niggas are so thirsty for Rachel. It's so crazy right now. Y'all would not even realize the guys. And they always hit me up. These be niggas I ain't seen in years. Yo, King, how you doing, bro? You know, I know, King is crazy. Yo, King, how you doing, bro?

I know, you didn't fall in on some hard times lately. Things been crazy for you. I'm like, okay, yeah, you didn't reach out then. Yo, man, what's so much about you know? So much shoddy. But you never hooked me up. Because I know, I know better. Remember, I worked at...

So are you telling me it's hopeless for me out there? No, it's not hopeless. Okay. But you're going to go through some bullshit, and I'll be here for you. It's not hopeless. It's not hopeless at all. But you got Willie. You know, you're saying?

Willie Jones. All right, last one. And by the way, before we go, Donnie, before you change it, this right here, this last one, is one of the most prolific glazes I think that I've ever seen before in my life. Okay. Donnie? On Americans see deportations or repatriations happen. They're going to be like, thank you.

When I see the border close, they're going to be. say this is what I voted for. When they see P starting to like break out again around the world, they're going to be like this is the stability that we were asking for. Daddy's back. So Terrence, Terrence, that's one of yours.

That's Florida Congressman Byron Donald's. And this is at the beginning of the year in January, when Byron Donald said that Daddy, Donald Trump is Daddy. That Daddy is home. Three times in my life I've been called Daddy

One is when I bought a really expensive purse The other one is when we wrote And the third one is from a kid Who thought that I was their father But I really wasn't I cannot imagine Rest in peace to Van Terry Lathen Sr. Get up from a father My nigger right there in the green and white

Hat, you didn't clap for my dad And I'm not sure I looked around and I looked directly at you And this nigga was like shit, I don't know that, nigga. The Bronx, nigga. I still fuck with you, though. I fuck with uninterrupted, too.

But anyway, so this nigga got nut on his face. And more importantly, it really was a window into Rachel, just how attached to some members of the Republican Party or the right, the paternal relationship that they feel with Donald Trump. And it's something that you really can't talk through or talk around, it feels like sometimes. Well, it's disgusting. And, I mean, we're out of, we run out of slides. But you easily could have put Tim Scott.

Tim Scott. Friend of the podcast. He doesn't know it, but he's a friend of the podcast. I call him gummy bear. We said we were going to stop. We said we were going to stop doing that. We said we were, guys, don't laugh. We said we could stop.

Let me talk. We said we were stopped. No, no. No. Listen. Stop. Do the voice, way. The Ukrainian people have to understand.

The only way out of their situation is the leadership of Donald Trump. Donald Trump is the one that can bring the world together. If not for him, I don't understand what me and my wife, who I just met three months ago, are going to do. I'm not gay. I should never brought him up. Well, that's it. That's the glazes of the year. Look, let me tell you guys something. There could have been more for sure.

There could have been more. Here's the thing about the glazer the week is we've been giving it to the Republicans a lot, but it's getting boring because glazing is a part of the platform. We're going to start. We just, 2020 was the Democrats. I know. But that was just an unimpeachable glaze. But there's a lot of glazing that goes on.

And my next book, by the way, and I'll announce it right here. have another book coming out. The name of this book is Dick riding must die. Okay. I'm being 100% serious. How objectivity can save the world. And I truly believe that the ability

to critical think and to set apart tribalism to a degree, I'm always going to be with y'all. But we have to be able to look at an issue and do the information synthesis in a way that is outside of centering ourselves or allegiances and we have to use our brains. We have to work that muscle. But can I be honest, I don't think that it's the ability to critical think. I think that they're fully capable of doing that. It's the ability to be fearless and not care what people think about you or what the repercussions

they're going to be or what your party's going to say, it's just the ability to call things out for what they are and just speak your mind. I wish I agree with you. And so many people, you wish you agreed with me? I wish you agreed. I would agree with you. Because so many people won't do that. So this is what I think.

I really do think that intellectual fearlessness is a skill. It's not something that you're endowed with, right? And so, like, I remember back in the day, I was in Mr. Holland's fucking physics class. And he said to me, he said, you know, the sun is going to burn out. I was like, what? He's like, the sun won't be there forever. And I was like, he was like, don't worry, we have billions a year left. I was like, I don't give a fuck how long we have.

You mean to tell me it's going to be somebody that wakes up, one day and they're going to be like, there's no sun. The sun is going. And he was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. The sun will supernova. And then I was like, so how are we going to get Nova? Nova. He was like, I'm like, how are we going to get the UV rays and stuff that we need for the sun?

He goes, oh, that won't matter. Because when the sun's supernovas, it will consume the earth. But he said billions of years, right? Don't matter. Okay? And I remember going home to mom, Mom was like, how did the algebra test go? I go, who cares?

When were you going to tell me that the sun was going to supernova and consume the earth? And she was like, we got billions of years. I'm like, I'm taking crazy pills. Like, no, like, who's going to care about the people? So what I'm saying is that truth is truth, no matter how inconvenient it is.

So you can pretend like that's not. not going to happen, or you can come up with a contingency to save the human race, which would be long gone, save the human race a billion years from now. And I think that there are people that are more afraid of the inconvenient truth than they are willing to confront it, talk about it, and deal with it. The fact that the United States of America has been a country that has been involved in systemic and institutional racism since its founding is a very interesting. conventional truth, unconventional truth for the terrances out there. But it's something that we have to reconcile.

I guess for me, when you talk about the truth, it's way closer. Like the decisions we're making now, what we're doing now is so much more closer that if it doesn't impact us, it will surely impact the next generation as opposed to the sun, you know, doing whatever it does billions of years. You don't care. Well, you said we, and I was like, we, who cares? I could care less about that. I'm sorry.

What? It's billions of years. Like, let the people who are a million years, maybe like 10,000 years care about that. But when we talk about what's happening politically to us, that is affecting us now. We see it, we feel it. And if it's not, it's going to affect us in the next generation.

So two totally different things. I don't give a fuck about the sun. Who says that? I don't. Who says I don't give a fuck about the sun? Walking around cold all the time? We got to move on in the next. next thing. All right, it's time for animal games.

It's time. So here's the thing. But our next two, we have animal games and then we have the apology game. Okay. But we need one of, we need one of you. Who in the audience right now thinks that they know about animals? Who wants to play? Oh, they're pointing at you.

They're pointing at you. Nobody. Nobody. Are you some kind of... Okay. Wait, wait, wait, hold on. Hold on. Are you some kind of zoo biologist? Hey, what's your name?

Give it up for Naomi. She's coming up on the stage to play animal games. Naomi, come on. No, Naomi. Naomi, come on. Naomi. Naomi, Naomi. You don't have a choice at this point.

Naomi. Naomi's coming on stage right now to play animal games. And while we're doing this, okay, Naomi's coming up. She's playing animal games with us. While we're doing this, this is what we need for the segment after animal games. We need two people, a man and a woman, that think that they are good at apologizing.

We're going to have an apology off between men and women. My brother right here. It's a bit of gender wars. Gender wars. It's a bit of gender wars. You think you're good at apologizing? Right here.

Her hand shot up first over here. So you want to do it. Okay, we need a sister. Right here. She was right here up here. Who? Sister, okay. And you.

So the two of you and you go to the back. we're going to put off of the men and the women. Who's better at apologizing right now, brother? Go to the back. Go to the back. Okay, but first, it's Animal Games. Donnie. Play the theme song.

Animal, Animal, Animal, Animal Game. Donnie! Animal, Animal, Animal, Animal Game. That's the Animal Game Game series song right there. You keep the hat right here. I'm going to sit right here since I'm hosting. Where's Naomi? Donnie, you're a brand new father.

I don't know about brand new. How is Junie now? Junie is a year and two months. Wow. That's brand new. That's great. You abandoned a podcast for untold months so that you can go be a dad. Van was upset.

I know. But you know what? I was upset, but then Ashley did such a great job. Ashley. Ashley's here, guys. Give it up for Ashley. Then at a certain point, I was like, do we need this, nigga?

It got there. About month three. I was like, we're okay. Y'all are rolling. Yeah. And then stop trying to act like you didn't care. You saw the way he came up on stage, right? Did you want us to fail? Donnie, let me tell you something.

So this is what I don't like. Okay. I don't like that sometimes I go to the Reddit and people go, Dan, stuff. I hate his thinking. I hate his game. I hate his voice. I hate everything about him.

You know who we should get more burn on the podcast? You know who we want, know who we need? We need Donnie. We need Donnie's taste. They love Donnie. They love Donnie. Donnie, I want you to say something. I want you to give a take right now

that you think would be unpopular with the people. Don't live in my world. Don't do this. Don't do this. Don't do this. Don't say something right now. that you think the people... Where's Naomi?

Well, Naomi, come on up here. Donnie, say something right now. It's safe over here. That you think the people wouldn't like. Duh. Hi, Naomi. Donnie, do it. Fuck the Knicks.

Oh, my God. I love it. What's the score of the game? What's the score of the game? What's the score of the game? Huh? Who's up? We appreciate you guys being here in the middle of the next game.

That's real loyalty, so thank you, despite what Donnie said. All right, Naomi, do you have a microphone over there? Naomi, speaking to the mic. Hi. How are you? I'm well. How are you? Oh, I'm doing gross.

Naomi, where are you from? Oh, I'm from Boston. Oh, I'm sorry. Oh. Oh. The same thing is. Are you a Celtics fan? I am, which is funny.

Yes. We chose well. Wow. Yes. My boyfriend's actually at the bar watching the game because he's a Knicks fan. Oh, wow. And he was offended. I didn't invite him tonight.

Yeah. And I was like, oh, well, you don't need to go. Naomi, we're so happy that you're on stage with this planet. Thank you. Your friends pointed directly at you. No. Do you have a love of animals? Well, okay, long story short.

I had, I went to college for. marine biology. Oh, no. But I switched my major to environmental studies, and now I work in social impact. Oh, give it up for Naomi. Thank you.

Thank you. You're going to be great. It's animal games time. Donnie, let's go. All right. Since we're in New York, obviously we're going to do New York-based or New York-themed animals. What, rats? We're saving that for less.

We'll do a whole animal game of rats? Do y'all know the rules to animal games? Do I need to explain them? Explain the rules for it. Okay. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to ask a series of questions, multiple choice or true or false. To each of them, they'll answer them.

And we'll tally up the winner. Hey, nigger, don't take over the podcast. We had to have it off mic moment. We were like, look at Donnie. Tell the rules. So we can go. These are the rules. Those were the rules.

All right. Guest first. You ready? Okay. All right. The actual, the first animal isn't rats. It's going to be pigeons. Oh.

Right? I haven't seen a rat in my time in New York yet, but I've seen hell of pigeons. Okay. First question is, what is a baby pigeon called? Multiple choice. Oh, okay. A, chicklet. B, peep.

C, squab. Oh, shit. Or D. Pufflet. I don't know. I like Pufflet, so I'm going to go with Pufflet. I like Pufflet too, but you're wrong. Naomi, what the fuck?

It's C, Squab. They were trying to help you out. I know. I was like, I want to cheat. And y'all better do the same for me. Squab comes from the Scandinavian word for loose fat flesh. Oh, my, daddy. Oh, daddy.

Lose, flesh. Oh, my God. Oh, father. All right. Let's continue with the ladies' first theme. Rachel, which one of these things is a lie? Is a what? Is a lie.

Which one of is not true? A, in lab experiments, pigeons have learned to read simple words. B, New York City once tried to give pigeons birth control. Oh, my Lord. C. Pigeons make milk. D, all of those things I just said are lies. Hey, why don't you just answer the question while I'm doing?

Y'all think pigeons read? I'm going with D. Yeah, you're right. Yay! Oh, wait, wait. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. D is a lie. Everything I said was true.

Yeah. Pigeons make milk. I hurt that wrong. Thank God I've been taking shots. One point for me. One point for Rachel. Crop milk is a thick, cheesy paste. Oh, my God.

I've dissected a pigeon before. Did you? Yeah. In our middle school, our science teacher caught pigeons. He would trap them. I'm pretty sure this was illegal. Wait a minute. Wait, wait.

He caught the pigeons himself? All right, all right, all right. So seventh and eighth grade, our science teacher, shout out to Mr. Minzik. He would, we went, I went to school in downtown Dallas, and so he built a contraption that would lure the pigeons in, and then he would close the box down, and then he would freeze them. and then we would dissect them. Rachel. So that's how I know some pigeon fash. Rachel.

Rachel. You just shouted out Mr. Minzick. Mr. Minzik has killed so many people. It was Dave Minsk, to be correct. Leaders' tears? All right. You ready? This is what you could do at private school.

There are no rules. Last question is going to be. for Van. You got a true or false question. Okay. Pigeons made for life and only form new pairs during the breeding season. True or false? That's false.

It's true. Damn. Pigeons are generally monogamous. But... My time to stand up. Thank you so much. Sorry, Donnie. Go ahead. I don't believe that.

Yeah. It's true. But pigeons, just like humans, aren't always faithful. Male pigeons often make other female pigeons. You feel me? I mean, we respect our queens. We good, but we got to grow up.

Like in our 20s, you know what I'm saying? So when we get to our 30s, like 35, we calm the shit down. Um Rachel To my deep deep chagrin One animal games Give it up for Rachel

There's another round Oh there's another round Sorry I don't like You got time We have time Okay go There's one more round I'm gonna roll let's go

I start with me this time Start with me nigga No No No We're starting with our guests Right Naomi

Naomi where'd you go to college again Where'd you go I went to the university of Delaware Oh wow And so you went to the University of Delaware, and then you, so what do you do? You say you do impact work now? Yes.

I do social impact in the corporate space. So I work for a team called Tech for Social Good. And we basically do pro bono work in tech capacity building for, you know, globally for all nonprofits, socially focused organizations. Give it up for Naomi. Look at our thought warriors. Make it a difference in the world. Thank you. All right. One more round of animal games.

All right. Rats. This rat species is the most commonly found in New York City. Multiple choice. Okay. A. The brown rat. B. The thicket rat.

The thick rat? Thicket. Thicket. Because I was thinking, Scotty with the body. C. The black rat. Ford. D, the giant naked-tailed rats.

These are some sensual rat names? Are these all real species? Yeah, these are all real. Okay, what you got, Naomi? I feel like maybe because they're brown. I don't know if it's dumb to be like, uh-oh. You can ask for help from, because you're a guest, you can ask for help from the audience. Who thinks they know?

Thickett. They're not sure. They say the thicket rat. One person said thicket. She's not from here. Don't ask her. She's in Texas. Don't like you.

Okay. I'm going to say the brown rat, the first one. Yes. I want to say the brown rat too. I want to say brown rat. The brown rat is bigger and more aggressive than the black rat, which was officially displaced by the brown rat in 2014. Go ahead, man.

Oh my God. The joke's right themselves. Yeah, they do. All right. Rachel, you ready? This was multiple choice, too. All right. The average lifespan for a wild brown rat in New York City is A, four to five years, B, 10 months,

C, one to three years, or D, seven to eight years. Years. Lifespan. What was C, one to three? C was one to three. I don't know. I'll go with C. You'll go right.

You're right. You're correct. It's over. It's over, guys. It's over. Y'all are tied. It's over. Thank you so much.

All right. I think you're kind of out of it, but we still ask this question. Give me the fucking question. True or false? Again, rats are one of the few mammalian. species where females prefer mates with smaller penises. Donnie.

Donnie. This is perfect for you. Nigel why? That's perfect for me. Have you heard? Sexual question. You know how the glaze of the week. You love to bring these things up.

This is perfect for you. You should be an expert. True or false? 50% chance. Now, they like little dicks. What do you say? True or false? Rats like little dicks.

So here's my question. How the fuck do we do we? notice. What? I knew. Naomi knew. True. It's false. The bigger, the better. Studies show that female rats prefer mates with meat.

It doesn't matter who you are. Rats actually have a bone in their penises that's called the baculum. It helps it with size and rigidity. You're out, though. I love it here. We do have a tiebreaker because you guys are tied. Well, no, I had two. You had two?

You have one. But that's okay. We can do the tiebreaker. We can do the tiebreaker. It's a guess. No, why would we do it? The tiebreaker. Let's just do it.

Let's just do it. Let's just do it. Like, like, like, by the way, let's a little tiebreaker. Let me tell you y'all something. Let me tell you y'all something. Donnie fixed his animal games. No.

He's that what she does. You see how you can't give a woman credit? You can't give women credit that they're just better than you. In that right. Yeah. Come on. That's true. That's really what it comes down to.

Thank you, Donning. Thank you. We can do it. We can do it. We can do it. This is the bonus question. In Donkey Kong Lord, the original 1981 version

had Mario trying to rescue the princess from atop the Empire State Building. The question is, the princess in this original version, her name was, multiple choice. A. Persephone.

B. Peach. C. It was just princess. Or D. Pauline. This is all Naomi. First. Yeah, just go like name.

I'm going to go with Persephone. Just because I like it. Damn it, you're wrong. I'm going to go C. It was D. Pauline. Damn, we both were wrong. Her name was Pauline. She had an old black lady name.

Yeah, what the fuck? That lady would never find herself in that predicament in the first place. No, that's right. That's true. All right. Now I'm done. That shit was whack.

Bye. Thank you, Naomi. Y'all give it up for... Animal animal, animal game. Thank you, Donnie. Thank you, Nail. Animal, animal, animal game. Are you mad?

Are you upset? That's the animal game. No, because let me tell you, it's not about being mad, okay? But let me tell you what the thing is. You don't care about animals. That's not true. Clearly. And I brought animal games to the podcast.

in order to raise awareness for animals. And what Donnie does is he fixes animal games. He fixes animal games every single time to where I get crazy dick questions. You had a better percentage than we did. You had 50-50 and you still couldn't get it. But what he did, though... We had 25%.

Okay, listen, guys. Ooh, ooh, I'll give a fuck. See, I'm so glad you y'all get to see a man. Hold on. Hold on. Y'all don't understand. This is my life, okay? my life is getting judged by Rachel

about different things she keeps me you know me and Rachel but here's the thing how are you going to give me a question about the size of rat dicks I got all of this entrenched homophobia I'm trying to get it out I would have known it's true y'all know what I'm saying ladies I would have known it was true oh for real yeah

it doesn't change well I just know I just know women you know women but then there was a white boy so anyway um Not the low-hanging fruit What else you got? Nothing. I got nothing.

Come on. I got nothing. Because you back, you back to the black. Give it up for Rachel. I came home. I came home. This episode is brought to you by Sweet Green. The day doesn't ask for permission.

Lunch window? Gone before you saw it coming. You deserve a break that actually satisfies. Sweet Green's new wraps have got you. Real ingredients? Zero shortcuts. Everything you love in one hand. Think green goddess chicken.

Garlic aoli. Crumbled bacon. Corn salsa. 40 grams of protein. Made to keep up with whatever comes next. New sweet green wraps hit different. Order now at order. Sweetgreen.com.

This episode is brought to by weather tech. Everyone knows winter is the MVP and making a mess. You don't need weather tech floor liners in the summer unless you hit the beach or go camping. Then you'd want a cargo liner. Or a road trip goes sideways. ketchup goes rogue, ice cream drips. Yeah, you'd be pretty happy about those weather tech seat protectors. So just to be clear as the mud, you're inevitably going to step into the summer.

You don't need weather tech unless you plan on doing summer. Visit weathertech.com today. Oh, my next day. It's time for the apology. It's time for gender wars. Gender wars, yeah. Hey! All right.

Now, you guys get to sit here. And I'm going to read that, so this is a Rachel. situation. Rachel, of course, you guys know, is the apology raider here at Higher Learning. Now, she's never given an apology rating that is sufficient for anyone ever. However, we want to know who's better at apologies.

Men. What's this hat you got? Oh, my God. Tell us about the hat. You really want to know? Yeah. Yes. I'm a very boring person. When you... Everyone, my name's John. When I heard that you guys are going to be here, I was like, let me do something special for the Thought Warriors. And so I went to New Era, and I got a lot of spam text afterwards.

But I asked them to make a custom hat. Oh, my God. Oh, wow. Thank you. We don't even have our own merch, so thank you. We don't even have it. No, we don't. But we need to.

Give it up for John. We need more applause. Thank you. Thank you. Okay. That's actually awesome. One more thing. What's up?

I was talking to my boy D over here from my dad, but you guys got me through the pandemic. It was really, really tough. Really want to thank you guys, yeah. Thank you. Absolutely. It's amazing. John, thank you, John.

And what's your name? I am Brianna. Brianna. Brianna, what have you done special for the podcast? You're here. My presence is your gift. I like that energy. I like that energy.

Now, ladies, not mad. But I will say, my husband is a huge fan. and he turned me on your podcast. He's been a loyal listener since day one. Your husband? Where's he at? That's what I'm talking about, brother. Let's not forget

this is gender wars. Got a good one. And we're already bringing the energy. Let's go. But John, I appreciate you too. You want him to be like, gna, you want him to be like, nigger, come home. That's what I'm talking about.

That's all the other than this. Anyway. Okay. Apology contest. The first scenario. You're apologizing to your romantic partner for an argument that you had with their mother.

Here is the caveat. You truly believe their mother was wrong. Sister, you can go first. So she's apologizing to... She's apologizing to her partner, this brother right here, because she got an argument with his mom. However, she truly believes that his mom was wrong.

I just want to start by saying that I would never do that. Not that I love his mom, but that I love him. You already got a point. A lot of people are going to look. You got a good one. That's the type you want. Fuck your mama. You're my husband.

That's what you want. So my thought process and apologies is that I acknowledge my part in it and I acknowledge what I did wrong as much as I could, but I also talk about what got me there. I think it's very terrible that women always get called out for their reactions and never, what happens, pre. So give us the apology. What would you say? That was great. So I would say, listen, things have calmed down. Now that things have calmed down, I want to talk to you about what happened. I just want to say my execution was wrong, right from the bat. I know you're mad at me. But I do believe that if you listen past my frustration,

and hear what I have to say, it is valid. And please ignore for one second how I did this. And can you please hear where I'm coming from? But I am truly sorry and I deeply regret the issue that I have caused with you and your mother. Let's see if we have steps forward. This nigger, God. This nigger crazy. I'm going to be honest with you.

All right, John. I hear a lot of booze, but what would you do? Same scenario. Same scenario. Once again, we're going to the same scenario. You're apologizing to your romantic partner for an argument you had with their mother. You truly believe the mother is wrong.

I know that you saw pretty hair and I, like outside during dinner, but I want you to know that that discussion was truly from a good place. She wanted to plan the trip. in the middle of your closing statement and I really didn't want to make that a conflict for you and a challenge and so I told her

that I thought the week before would be better or the week after. Give them some space. Let John Cook. Are you done? I think the background is that he's a lawyer so I think I heard you say closing statement. He was talking about an actual...

He tried to actualize the event. Let John cook. John is cooking some chitlins. All right. Rachel, score each one. Just score John first. Oh, shit, John. You're not reflective of what I'm at Rose. Rachel.

Who am I doing first? Score John first. John gets a three. But it's a three. It's a three. Which I do have to say John is higher than I've ever given any apology on the podcast, for starters. I don't know what you were talking. talking about.

But I love this you created merch, and for that I'm appreciative. And three is a lucky number of mine, so that's why I decided to go with three. Okay? So what's your name again? This came with it. She gets a nine. I'm sorry. The explanation, the thought behind it, the time, the care you gave to him to his mom, the respect.

I don't know how you could do anything else. I wanted to give a 10, but I was trying to be fair. Are you listening? Are you listening? Thank you. It was good. We're going to try again. We got more. We got more. Second one.

Okay, here's the deal. You're apologizing to a good friend for missing their wedding. Here's the thing. You had a once-in-a-lifetime career opportunity, and you think they're marrying the wrong person. John, you get to go first. again, you're apologizing to a good friend for missing their wedding. You had a once-in-a-lifetime career opportunity and you think they're marrying the wrong person. All right, first of all, I want to start off with saying, I'm sorry. I think you understand that for me, this opportunity was truly

once-in-a-lifetime. And I want to take a step back for a moment and explain why I'm starting off with the career opportunity. It's because... primarily for me. Hey! Wait a second. Don't do that. Go ahead, John. Let John get through his apology. John, continue.

For me, on my values hierarchy, security is number one. And so I have to let them know that truly they are a good friend for this opportunity couldn't be missed. You said it's a good opportunity. Wait, wait. You to finish. Let him go. Let him go.

Come on, John. Come on, John. He's not done. And once that hierarchy is satisfied, I can give myself to everyone else. So I want to give my full self to you as a friend. And truthfully, as a token of my true, true regret, I want to give $500 to your honeymoon. Okay, because you got the job now.

Because you got the job now. Because you got the job. I get it. I get it, John. I get it. You got the job. I'm just trying to think of a good number. John, listen, John gave up

I'm going to be honest with you. That was the most male apology I've ever heard before in my life. Okay, now, sister, come through. Okay, here we go. I'm going to try my best here. Just want to set the scene. This is happening before the wedding, not after the wedding. I would never just not show up.

Not a fan. That's part of the accountability. Either you tell them straight up or don't tell them at all. So I'm calling to let you know, hey, you know, I want to have a serious conversation with you. I'm not able to go to your wedding. And for myself and you, I want you to understand why. It's a two-prong issue here. One, as much as I would love to support you and be there for you in your relationship,

you already know how I feel because I've voiced it about your partnership. And although I would still stand there on that day to support you. you, I don't want you to think that that's why I'm not going. The second part is, I unfortunately, fortunately for me, unfortunately for you, I got a new job. It's popping. I'm like VP of whatever I wanted. And unfortunately, I know that I can't be there, but I know that you would support me on your big day and I would support you on my big, on your big day and vice versa, excuse me. So we're going to be clapping for each other in different places. And we're going to get, after your wedding, I won't take you guys out,

even though you know I hate him, but I will be there for you. And you'll be there to pick up the pieces when it ends. Exactly. When it is. You'll be there for her when it ends. Damn. Okay. John. Van threw his hat.

You don't want Van to score this one. Oh, wait, wait. I'm not, I can't score it. No, no. But I'm going to give you a five. Hold on. John, you say you want to try one. One, run, quickly.

Go. Go. On this topic? Help John. The next one. The next one. On the last one. I'm giving you a five. It's okay.

Because you did come full circle. It's okay, Tessa. And you did try to bring it back. Everybody did try to give them money to compensate. Oh, wait. Give it up for Elizabeth. Give it up for the whole Spotify team. Come over here, sit down.

I'm a deduct a point because I was trying to give you a score and Van was talking over me. Thank you. No, I'm just kidding. I'm sorry. Sorry, with my own eyes. I started with my own eyes. No, no, no. I'm giving you a five because you tried to bring it full circle. You came back. You gave them some money. That was nice. But you never addressed the issue of the fact that you didn't like the significant other.

You just skirted over that. Some people think, okay, that's a good point. Some people think you shouldn't have. I'm giving sis a nine again. Yes. I did what I was told. Yes. I told you guys. I wouldn't do that anyway.

She addressed everything. It was thoughtful, considerate. It covered all the bases. I wouldn't be mad at you. But I would have liked the gift. I would have liked something. I said I was going to take you out. That's a good gift.

And I'll give you a Dyson. I'll give you a Dyson. I'll do a Dyson. Okay. That's not $500, even. 478. For the last round, we're going to bring, you know,

some brotherhood into it. We're going to double team it. You don't need it, sis. Okay. Eiffel Tower this thing. My man, what's your name? Skylar. Skyler?

Yeah. That's a white-ass name. I know. So. Blame my mom. So. Happy Mother's Day. This is...

So we're going to go back and forth. We're going to go, you, Skyler, John. Last one. You're apologizing for old tweets. The tweets are bad. racism whatever schism you can choose there's all the isms

you can do whatever isms and schisms that you like whatever but you know damn well someone is out to get you by digging up these old tweets so you're apologizing for the tweets but at the same time

you're like I'm just got popping and people digging up old tweets man fuck them okay so that's what's in your mind go I just want to say it's been a really difficult time oh my nigga hold on bro

my bro bro let me tell you something hold on real quick real quick my guy I know you're in a fucking blender weekly weekly you're in a blender

bro I know you don't because you come home and the dishwasher is not empty and she goes let me tell you what this means Okay, you're in a blender. You got... Okay, go ahead. It was great. I just want to say I've had a very difficult time,

processing all of my feelings and everything around me. I want to thank my support system who's been here to really show me who I am, and that's honestly you guys. And this are the moments that I know that I have family. And I just want to say, when I saw what I said, I can't believe it was me. Don't make me laugh. I couldn't believe that was me.

And honestly, all of the work, the introspective work that I've done to find myself gone in five seconds. Because I was just a child then. But now I know I made a mistake. And I just want to say I deeply regret it. and all the frustrations that I've caused, all of these people questioning who I am, just know it's the real me now. They like it.

They like, and your husband. The ladies are your husband. Okay, all right, all right. Turn. The tweets are bad, but you know damn well someone is out to get you by digging them up. Try your best, nigga. So, first off, I would just like to apologize to the community.

I never ever, ever harbored any ill feelings, any resentment toward who I offended by those tweets. I did make those tweets. I can't deny that I said those words. What I can say is that I didn't intend to make anyone feel that way. I know intent isn't impact. In the way that I've impacted this community, I can't take that back.

Okay? I know that my words hurt people and I am truly, truly sorry. I have turned to God. I am actively. I am actively in therapy. I am unlearning. I am unlearning the views of my grandfather and my ancestors.

I am doing what I can. This little went black. I am doing exactly what I can to make sure that I apologize and mend any of the fences that I have broken, I am so sorry. I promise that I will be better in the future. I cannot say that I will be...

Don't do too much, Scholar. I cannot say that I will be perfect, but I would, again, sincerely like to apologize to all of those who I've offended. What up? He's good. John?

I'm going to make this quick. All right. Give him a chance. What I said. But... But... But... But, that's what I would say.

And that's the tweet. But that should not take away from what I'm going to do going forward. I'm a different person. I saw and I see the hurt. I'm going to change man. John. Quick, clean. Give it up for John, y'all.

Hey, you know what this told me? All three of y'all got some fucked up tweet somewhere. Because y'all was too cold at that shit. I've been practiced in my whole life. That was the best one. All of y'all had great apologies. I think the audience agrees. Give yourselves a round of applause.

However, I have to keep the same energy I do with the podcast. I don't believe any of y'all. Not a one. It was very transparent. It was beautiful. You said all the right things. Changed, man. God.

Your whole thing was great. But I don't believe any of you. You all get a one. All equally a one. Because I don't believe you. I don't believe you. I don't believe you. Sorry.

Sorry. So my tears were nothing? That's crazy. The tears, you lost me with the tears. Because I don't believe you. You all said what you're supposed to say. But, you know, you did it. And you know, on the podcast, I'm a firm believer.

I don't care what age you were. In this first, gender wars, sister, you took it home. Yeah, he did. Thank you. So all my women out there, thank you. All the ladies. I'm here for you guys. All the sisters.

Okay, you guys can leave. Thank you guys so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And have a seat. Sit down. Sit down, sit down.

Exactly. What did y'all think about this first live show ever? We couldn't do it without you guys bringing the energy. You guys have been great. Give y'all selves a round of applause. You've been great. Till the next time, take your thin caps off, but do not stop learning. I'm Van Lathen, Jr.

I'm Rachel and Lindsay. Bye, guys.