Historically High - HH 1v1 - Best Smoking Buddies

Episode Date: September 16, 2022

I want you to close your eyes for a second, yes you reading this just do, well crap wait I haven't told you what to actually do yet. Okay I want you to close your eyes AND imagine your smoking Dream Team. Well that's what we did. We took our White Whales of sports, entertainment, the imagination, etc and explain what would make them the ultimate Bud Buddy. Support the show Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

After I said I was done, I only looked back at this list like 15 times last night. I was going to say, I re-looked at it once this morning just to make sure all my picks still sounded good. All right, one-on-one-one time. What is the topic, Adam? Our topic today is going to be the best smoking partners. So we're going to have our first pick will be a celebrity to smoke with. Our second pick will be a musician. Third pick will be athlete.

Fourth pick will be a dead. And fifth pick, which you threw this in at the last second and it just exploded my mind. But our fifth pick is going to be a fictional character. I went very deep into fictional characters. I had to think about that one probably the most just because you have so many versions of fiction. It could be a TV, movie, book character, video game character. I don't know what it says about my childhood, but fictional characters brought me right back into childhood. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Which childhood character I'd like to smoke with. um so just like all over other one-on-ones we'll start with the ceremonial flipping of the zin can to figure out smoking partners or figure out who goes first call it the air calls in in the air can you go first okay um so my one-one and this to me is just easy uh as a celebrity he's somebody that i love i love all of his movies i love everything that he's ever done seems like a really great guy i don't know anything about his recent escapades that he was in hot water for talked about, but mine's Bill Murray.

Bill Murray would be the greatest smoking partner and you see it a little bit in Zombie Land just as a joke but the guy loves going to baseball games. He owns a minor league team so him and I could roast a bowl or we could smoke a J and then we could go watch baseball. I can ask him about Ghostbusters. I can ask him about one of my all-time favorite movies in Caddyshack. Like me and this dude will talk about everything in his career that he's ever done.

And not to mention, like I say, it seems like a very nice guy. Likes to go and just like crash parties in some places. Yeah, he'll just show up at like random events or like at a wedding or something like that. If he happens to be at like the country club that the wedding's at or... Yeah. And he's worked with some of the... Some of my favorite characters in movies. Some of my favorite actors.

The guy's been around for... Can you imagine if you would have picked a Bill Murray character? character as your fictional character too. Yeah. Like if you wanted to smoke with like, oh, what's the Cousteau guy? Steve Zissot or, yeah, the underwater adventure of Steve Zissot, that one where he was like the Jacques Cousteau type guy. Or the dad and Royal Tannenbaum's, he's not the dad in there.

He's the psychologist, isn't he? He's the one that's married to the daughter that cut her finger off. Oh, I can't remember that. Or even Carl from Caddyshack. Yeah, Carl from Caddyshack would be my choice. Would it really? Yeah, because you'd get to sit. And all the fictional Bill Murray characters, okay.

And you get to go and hang out at his little shack that he lived at, that Chevy Chase plays through. And he makes his moonshine, and he grew his own weed that he has like a blend. Cannonball. Yeah. It's been in northern since Mia. Get to give new grass. It would be so much fun.

We would have such a good time to talk about different movies and things that he's done in his life. And I can say just an all-around fairly cool guy. Talk about old SNL. Yes. Yeah. Talk about hanging out with balusies and all those guys and just how that all went. Like Lauren Michaels, early Lauren Michaels talk when he was just in his prime bringing in just gold left and right. Yeah.

He's my one one very easily. When you were describing yours, I actually thought up until you said the name. Oh, until you said hot water that you'd actually pick mine. So I think the person that I would most like to smoke with would be, uh, Dwayne the Rock Johnson. I could see that. Find out first and foremost if he really is that guy.

As far as like his personality or just, like, you know, he seems literally like the, you know, the greatest guy on the planet and everything like that. And just to kind of find out and pick his brain to be like, is this real?

Like, is this really you? Do you dial it up? little bit or anything or is this just like how you operate and if you could get him to smoke too at the same time you would really be able to see more clearly that's what i'm saying that's why i would want to do that just to peel back the layers and then also just the fact that like like the dude like has lived like a genuinely awesome life even outside of the fact that he didn't get into hollywood until like later in his career just like his growing up like in the wrestling circuit with his dad and all that kind of stuff moving around so much going to play line or d for miami and then having to go play canadian

football then joining wrestling you know what are you what are you missing okay um yeah oh so okay but yeah just to hear his story and then to be like man after that first movie like did you feel like confident or like when did you feel like you were confident enough to step away from you know this huge following you had in wrestling to I mean like, how the fuck do you stay motivated, dude? And when was, like you say, when was that point where you realized that you didn't need wrestling anymore?

And that you would become, wasn't he still like one of the highest grossing actors in Hollywood or something like that? There's been several years where he has been. He's on that top five. Like, I think every single year, because you work so damn much too. But he also has all of his other things.

And at what point were you just like, ah, tequila sounds good? And then where you like, I can do an energy drink better. There's an interesting correlation. which I don't know who the first one was, but that jump to be like, you're super famous in what you do.

Do you want to make 10 times more money than you ever have? We're going to go ahead and sign you up with like a gin company or a tequila company or a whiskey company and it's going to grow your wealth. It's not even signing you up. You're buying it. You're starting it.

Like you're acquiring an already low-level existing one or not widely known. Something you can still purchase. But then your celebrity makes that so big. Well, yeah, you got Clooney's got his, Ryan Reynolds has his, everybody. That's the thing right now. Yeah, they branched out to it,

but it makes them so much more money. The spirits industry makes them so much more money than they ever would have. When you turn, yeah, when you turn around and sell it. I'm curious to know, I know that wrestling probably wouldn't be in his top five ventures, but I'd be curious to know what his top five moneymakers were. Like, is Teramatta taken over from anything? I'd be interested in there, too.

So, like, do you, do you like, do you like, like it when you go back? Like, what's your real, what's your real reason for going back and doing those, like, WrestleMania events? Even after you'd establish yourself as, like, the Aist actor, and just find out, be like, if it was genuine and be like, that's the company that, like, brought me up. Because that's, I've heard him say that kind of stuff. Like, he's, that's the company that made me what I am and gave me this opportunity. So to go back and to, like, revisit those fans and everything, because he seems to enjoy it. Well, and I think so much for him, and this is, I think it's cute and sad that I was talking about all the other things that I would have asked him

and talked to him about because we'd have never got to him. We would have never left wrestling. Like that, him and I could sit and talk for 48 hours and we wouldn't get to. You would have him walk you through every stone cold match. Yes. Every match is mankind. And Fast and the Furious, we'd have never got to because I would have been stuck saying, what was it like growing up with your grandpa being high chief? His little pussy. Yes. you grew up the grandson of High Chief Peter Mayavia who was a wrestling legend

the son of Rocky Johnson who was also a wrestling legend you grew up in a first family of Polynesian wrestling like you surpassed everyone yeah you were the rocket ship like you did that how in the world do you see yourself going from

curtain jerking and being brought into a faction like the nation of domination when you didn't have any firepower to outliving all them to moving up the stages to being a very famous intercontinental champion. I'll bring you with me when I spoke with him. I wouldn't if I were you. You wouldn't get a word in it.

I would limit you and be like he has five questions he gets to ask you. Well, in question number one is we've talked about this before. Just with my love of wrestling, I would love nothing more to get in and take bumps. And I would be the asshole that my first question would be like, hey, dude, can you either hit me with a people's elbow or can you hit me with a rock box? I'm like, teach me how to take that bump and do it to me because... A rotten air mattress. Hey, dude, I have a trampoline that I would like to assemble.

If you could just give me one. And that would, that would be, that would make my experience. We could never talk again. But if I took a rock bottom... You just be smiling there sitting there while I was talking being like, eh. And I would play it up. I would fall. It would just be so good.

He's, yeah, he's fantastic. All right. Who's your honorable mention? My honorable mention was, oh, I don't need a list for that. he's kind of like our generations I don't know necessarily like a Cheech and Chong but Seth Rogan would be Oh fuck god damn it

He's kind of a chalk pick because he is such like a weed smoking No but that that means that like he would know the best way to do it He'd be like no no no I'm going to show you all of the stuff in my line And this one is just gonna you would it would be like going with just like it would be going to like a tasting with someone that would make you laugh the entire time they were getting you stoned and teaching you all about this stuff. Oh my God, that...

And you would want it in a cross joint because that's what you saw in Pineapple Express and that was like... They had made creative designs and joints before, but that was the first time that the public had ever really been introduced to seeing something that wasn't just a regular joint. And you could talk about all the different movies that he had.

And even if you weren't talking, if something catches him off guard and you're going to laugh your ass on. I know. Plus, he's doing all that stuff with house plant now where he's creating joint rolling stations and all these super artistic

grinders and like decorative ashtrays. Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, he would be a blast. And he's another guy. Like, what is it like, what is Jonah Hill outside of Jonah Hill? What are all these guys? What's that group of people like?

Yeah. Is hanging out with Jason Segal? Yeah, was Franco always a pervert? Yeah. How do you feel about, shooting a movie about a dictator that we're currently at odds with. Like, how do you feel-

And then having that dictator hack and release the movie to where you don't get a theatrical release? Like, that's some crazy shit. Yeah, you got a pop from a world dictator. Like, that's a very big... You probably have, honestly, you probably have a price on your head in North Korea. How does that feel? Other neighboring places that feel the same. Like, I don't know if Seth Rogen movies do well in China.

I doubt Seth Rogen movies make it to China. But, yeah. What's your honorable? God, that was a good one. Ryan Reynolds. Yeah, I figured you were either going to do McConaughey or Ryan Reynolds. I thought of McCona. I'm not even shitting you, man.

I sat here and I was like, it's obviously got to be McConaughey. And then all I sat there was he is so fucking mellow as it is. Yeah. Then I feel like we would just sit there and I'd be like, hey, Matthew and me, he's like, easy, man, easy. I'd be like, I just need to ask you a question. Wait for it. Wait for Mother Nature.

to quit whispering to me. I just sit there for about and then 30 minutes go by and he goes all right, what do you want to ask me? And I fucking forgot it. Do you still have the bell bottoms from dazed and confused? But like the thing about, and this is going to sound weird,

but the thing about Ryan Reynolds is like, so he's come out and talked about how he has like major anxiety. And so he likes to put himself into, even in situations in which he's going to someplace like, you know, Tonight Show or whatever. He feels like he's like,

I step into the character of Ryan Reynolds, and he's like, and that's how I get through it is. He's like, I feel like I'm playing a character of myself. He's like, that's me when I'm, he's like, I'm playing me when I'm comfortable, but I'm not comfortable, so I'm happy to play me when I'm comfortable. And I feel like getting him a little stoned,

he could just kind of relax, and I'd be like, so like, how did you like work on your career? First of all, like, you dated the most beautiful women in Hollywood, and you feel kind of like, you're really good looking, but you also feel kind of like an every man. Yeah.

So I'm like, you bagged a woman that is very good looking and had like a very successful life. During a horrible movie. Yeah. You turned that movie into your life and your marriage. But then also talking to him and like, and so what point were you just kind of like with the Deadpool thing? You saw you wanted to do this.

You wouldn't take no for an answer. Did you leak the footage and find out if he leaked the footage? Yeah, that would be a good question. And then be like, and then the gin company branched out, that's huge. and then at what point did you and Rob McElheny decide that the soccer team was, have you watched?

No, so that's what I was going to ask you because that's like the perfect encapsulation what you're talking about. When I see the previews for that, I'm just waiting for them to bank a bunch of episodes so I can just rip through it. But when you see it,

I didn't know if it was a documentary, if it's a mockumentary, like what is it that him and another extremely funny guy like Rob McElheny would do together? I'm going to do it real quick because we've got to get to the next one. Okay. Basically what it is is,

they met over social media. They hadn't met in person until after I think they had gotten close to buying the team, but they talked about it. McElhanie said that he heard about this through some means, but it reminded him of Philadelphia because it was his town centered around the team. And then somehow suggested to Ryan Reynolds that they do this. The team was owned by the town. They wanted to go ahead and take over the team and they spoke to the town. They ended up acquiring the team. But it's a serious documentary.

It's funny and everything. But are they them playing themselves? Yes, no, it's not, it's the documentary crew following them through it. They filmed this two, a year and a half, two years ago when they were going through all this. So they already knew they're like, well, this is either going to, even if this ends in a fireball and this team doesn't win. Great TV. It's going to be great TV, but yeah. Okay.

All right, so musicians. All right, your first. This one was pretty hard, too. I went with Dave Grohl. Yeah. Because he's already been there. He's used to it. He'd probably sit there and teach me a few.

things, but at the same time, to be able to go ahead and kind of talk about not only food fighters, but Nirvana. And then the whole rise of that, like the whole rise of MTV, the, the rise of MTV, music videos becoming like a new level of popular when you can reach an entirely new audience, being able to see, you know, moving to streaming music and all that kind of stuff. But then just really just talking, been like, you play like every instrument man, like what band do you like playing with most aside from food fighters do you like playing with queens of the stone age what's like what's a session with you and jack black and cow gas like when you guys going to do a tenacious d album or when you go and just like what's the the best time you've ever been asked

to to guest play at a concert like you were in town or an artist called you of him was like hey do you want to come sit in for this concert or come play a few songs with us and like just to be able to kind of listen to that entire his life would just be amazing and the fact that he's done it so long And to pick that up too, to just be like, yeah, I'll come play guitar for you tonight. I'll come play drums for you tonight. Yeah. How fucking cool is that that your mind is so good at instruments and understanding music and knowledge that you can just jump into that and not miss a beat. Still be, I mean, he was a great drummer in his time for Nirvana.

And then he transitions that into the foo fighters, which I think he probably had a few stops in between maybe. Or did he go? I think he kind of, he may have played with some other people. but I think he may have started the band and then used a couple of guys from that band or then added some guys in and they all made a different group. But you transition yourself

into a very famous career, arguably historic career as the lead singer of the foo fighters. A member, a core member of two of the greatest rock bands that ever existed. And one that died too soon. And maybe a second one.

Yeah. That died and it still had a lot of legs. When you saw, it's weird that you bring that up, but wasn't it last night that they did the benefit concert on MTV? It was last night or a couple nights ago because I've been seen it show up on my feed. And the Taylor dude's son. Yeah. Playing my hero. That's so cool, dude.

That's the best way to do that. But yeah, and I'm fortunate enough to be able to say that, and I know people have seen them multiple times and everything, but just within the last couple years, I was fortunate enough to get a seafood fighters in concert. and it was just the show was amazing and, you know, that's a group that could, you know, the comparison I think is, is warranted, but that's a group that I feel like could have almost been like a Rolling Stones' itch group that could have maybe not put out an album as frequently or anything like that, but it continued to just tour once every few years and just been able to sell out every time. Well, and he gets to, like you say, with all the different performances that he does and everything,

he gets to scratch that edge so much more than just in the foo fighters. He's everywhere. That's very close to kind of one of the reasons why I chose my honorable mention for this one, because just that diversity that you get to see. You got to tell me your pick, though. Yeah. So my first pick is of historical lineage without actually having to be blood-related. But this, my generation, our generations,

and maybe one below us, their version of Snoop Dog, and it's Wiz Khalifa. Whiz is been baptized in the smoke of every great weed smoking rapper in the history of the whole entire culture. Snoop's got a lot of nephews, he's got a lot of cousins, but he was bathed in the smoke of Snoop Dog, one of the greatest pot smokers of all time. Baved in the bong water of Snoop. Yeah, he was baptized. in the bong water. They have done albums together.

He is a guy who just really kind of stays in his lane. I remember reading stories about how Wiz would pay like $1,000 an ounce. Not because he couldn't get it himself, but just because he didn't have like any sort of thought processes, how money works with the amount of weed. Like it's just here's the money, go get me weed. Like he smokes all the time. He's transformed his life.

he's been through different like big scandals he's got a great family it seems like but like him in black china it had don't know if you know who she is but they kind of had a fling and had a kid and things got weird and amber rose was a part of it like it was just a very Kardashians in on this at some point they always show up in there they stick the rugby head in there but he's just a fun loving guy who seems like he would be a blast to smoke with plus us listening to, I don't know if you would do that. Like if you went to go meet an artist like that, like if you were sitting around Dave Grohl, you'd be like, hey, can we listen to the Food Fighters?

Like, would you want to bring his own art up in front of him? I mean, I would discuss certain songs and like what they mean to me. And like... Not to like put it on in the background, though, like when you're hanging out. No, I think it'd be cool to be like, hey, you put something on. Like, what do you like listening to? That'd be so cool to take a peek into, peek behind the current of what he likes. You get to see what the creative mindset is that brings him to where he is.

I think that would be just a great reason to choose like a whiz or something like that because he would just be so much fun. You'll be able to do it like in studio while he's doing a little, yeah. Yeah, just to be able to sit in there and I would take that, like not even a whole day. Just like sit in on a studio session and watch these dudes smoke blunt after blunt, after blunt, get up freestyle, mix stuff together. Can you imagine? Can you imagine how much recording studios have had to advance in like the last like,

20 years for their filtration and ventilation systems. They pull out the filter and it's just green. It's just completely resonated over. Who'd you go for for your honorable mention? My honorable mention is John Mayer, because the man has had a run of sexual conquest that are damn near unmatched, and he gets to travel and play with deaden company. So he's had his own super successful career

And then also gets to go play guitar With a tribute band to one of the most influential drug music Bands to ever live It seems like such a jump to hear like your body is a Wonderland And then know that he's going and riffing off a 25 minute set Straight with Dead and Company But he transitions that world so easily And he's just an all around like nice guy

I've never forgiven him giving him for what he did to Jennifer Aniston. No, but I also think he's probably paid his penance because she's just forever going to be hot. She's going to be 100 years old and still smoke. That's true. He has to live with it. He probably got scared.

Yeah, I don't think she's a human being. But to know, like, every time you have to open up a magazine and see how hot Jennifer is and still is and know that that's what you're missing out. That's true. She's aged better than probably anybody that we've seen. That's true. Her and Halliberry.

Yeah. Yes. All right, I went with Mick Jagger. And I'm not even a big Stones fan, honestly, but I think that just sitting down and being like, and go. Start at the beginning. Yep. And I'm just going to sit back and listen, and then I will interject with questions every so often.

I'm like, leave no stone unturned, leave no detail out. I want to hear everything. I want to say it was another interview that he was doing where they calculated it out that Mick Jagger, and it might have been him. I think it was him that they were talking to. He had done like seven. million dollars worth of cocaine in his career or something like that like that was they asked him to put a number on it first question sorry first question before that'd been like first first question i'm gonna need you to go ahead and write down your health regimen yep and what you use and then please go from the beginning of your life him and keith moon two dudes that have just outlived their expiration date they feel like i would like the the british accent i feel like that would make the story better the whole thing it'd just be fun like an old male manny telling me an elaborate filthy night time story.

How do you feel that the way that you guys used to dress and think was cool on stage is now like the fashion icons of like female fashion now wore the same shit that you guys did? You ushered in an era of fashion for women instead of men, but somehow you pulled it off and you looked so goddamn cool. Yeah. All right. Athlete is your first. Uh, mine's a 100% pandering pick.

Mani Ramirez. Mani Ramirez, not a pandering pick maybe as much as just like Homer. Homer pick? Yeah, Homer pick. Yeah. He is my guy. He is the wackiest, weirdest dude that has probably ever played baseball. There's nobody, I guess there are turns of phrase in sports that are related directly

to guys. But the fact that whenever Mani would screw up, they would just say that's Mani being mani. And like, he just got a pass. No matter what he did. Yeah, he has one of arguably, in my opinion, top five sweetest swings in baseball. The guy could hit a ball a country mile. And during pitching changes, he would walk into the green monster and sit in there with the

scorekeeper and have like a hot dog to the point where they would have to send somebody that was managing the field out to knock on the door and say, hey, manny, they're ready to start playing again. Are you done? Like, him catching a fly ball running towards the fence, jumping up onto the, the fence, high-fiving a fan before turning around and throwing a ball in to get some dude out on a tag up. Like, just the goofiest shit that that guy is done.

When he got popped for steroids, which I've just made my piece with, he's never going to be in the Hall of Fame because of it. But him saying that he was trying to take female hormones, obviously, to cover up his steroids because he wanted to grow his dreads longer. Like, that's just an unabashed stupid excuse. You just want to ask him, be like, who told you to say that? Yeah. You didn't come up with that on your own, did you?

No. And there's stories about him being in Boston in his time in the off season where he was living in an apartment complex. He walks down to the doorman. He says, hey, I'm gone until we start up again. Just go ahead and watch this bag for me. It was just a black trash bag. He walks down and he hands it to the front door guy. And what do you, what do you ask?

Like, Manny Ramirez just asks you to hold a black trash bag that he doesn't want to keep in his apartment. What is it? Mani comes back next season the guy goes hey mannie i got your bag for you that you wanted me to hold on to hands it to him it was the silver slugger award that he had just won that year as a professional baseball player one of the greatest hitters in the outfield he bagged up all of his awards for that season as all-star everything like that

in a black trash bag and just handed it to a doorman to hold on to like that's a level of i don't give a fuck that i would love to achieve because if i had those i would figure out how to wear them around But he just doesn't even care. Like, just a super fun guy off the field, a super fun guy on the field. One of my favorite Red Sox of all time, he's just an easy pick. I went with Tiger. And I have like a whole day planned out.

What's the day look like? We meet early at the course. And so... Wait, who drives? We meet. You don't... I'm responsible. for me. You're not going to take a chance. Nope. If anyone, I'm driving regardless,

myself or both of us. No, but go to the course, start early, get stoned on the course, start talking about, and just during that time, I want to know about like his early life, and I want to know about his real feelings toward his dad. Yeah, and his mom. And his mom, and just that entire situation. And then kind of as we get off the course, kind of start moving into the other stuff. We can go, we can go back to his place, chill out, out back and everything, but I want to know about how he handled,

like how he really felt about handling that, like, rise to fame and literally being the most famous person in the world at a time. Oh, yeah. At a young age. At a young age. And if he felt like at any point in life, it was never worth it.

Like the childhood that he had to give up, does he ever think that, he would have been happier a different way based upon all of the negative stuff that's happened in his life. Why a goddamn Perkins waitress? Waitresses. Waitresses. He had a type and it was a very odd niche type. And I'm not kink shaman either. No. Not at all. Was it something about like they smelled like pie?

Did he ask them to bring a pie every time they came to see him? Yeah, exactly. I wonder if he could relate. the pitching wedge coming through the back of his escalade being swung by his wife, Ellen, as like maybe a ceiling, a glass ceiling in his life that he had broken through. Like this was it, that wedge going through his back window was like literally another chapter being brought up in his life. Well, and then the other thing too is like coming back like like the redemption, kind of

the redemption story and everything and then kind of finding out and this is, this would be like kind of interesting no being like you know when you got hooked on either painkillers or something like that like what what aspect of that like what were you trying to bury like was it that you were dealing with childhood shit or you were dealing with just like the pressure from society that everyone expected to come back and that they would be the greatest thing ever and so you felt like you had to give people that it was your duty to do that just he he would just be a really interesting person did his entire life has been tailored for this and he's been such a celebrity like, I wonder if he ever has regrets about not trying to live a more normal,

more normal life. Yeah, I think he's doing it now. And I would probably get into the more sapiness with him of talking to him like now. Like, you're out golfing with your son. Charlie's out there having a fucking blast. He has the swing. Like, when you see the mirror image of both of them next to each other, it's the exact same thing. Yeah, what was it like playing that round with your kid and literally just seeing,

a little mini you out on that course and you're like do I want like what level do I want this for my kid you just immediately know if you're Tiger I don't want him raise the same way that I was yeah and you want him to do what he wants you want him to have fun but at the same time you have that hyper sportsmanship in you like that that drive to be the best how do you convey that to your kid without going too far like that's a very odd question to try to ask you I like that All right, who Jeff is your honorable mention? Childhood legend, Dennis Rodman. I'd like to ask him what he thinks he's going to do for Brittany Griner over in Russia.

I'd like to ask him what him and Lough Kim did over in North Korea. I don't want to get too far into like his early life because that was a cluster fuck, and I know to stay away from that. Like, what did you go do? You and Carmen Electra during the NBA season and in the playoffs, like, just snuck off to Las Vegas and banged for two days straight. What was involved in that? When you married yourself and you were in a – when you tried to marry Carmen Electra, I think it was, and you dressed up in the wedding gown and she was in a tux? Like, was that all you?

Was that just something in your mind that you wanted to do? Was that something that you had – Did you fly with the dress? Yeah. Like, what is that? Why would you pull up to basketball? basketball games when you're making millions of dollars on a fucking chopper. You just decided that pro wrestling was the natural progression to jump off to and do it.

The NWO was calling. Come on. Yeah, he definitely. If you were a professional athlete during that time, knowing your background in the NWO was like, hey, what would you think about stepping in for a run? You get to wrestle, A. Carl Malone, who you've fought on the court in some of the best brawes that have ever happened in basketball. You guys are going to go do a complete storyline and a fabricated wrestling. world where you get to be Hollywood Hogan's right-hand man and poorly execute a lot of wrestling moves. But like that to me seems like when you cross those kind of, you could talk to him for days. Yeah. Because he crossed so many boundaries. Oh yeah. I went with Michael Phelps. Because I just

want to know what that like, what would have been like a 16, 16 year span? Yeah. He was in four Olympics, I think, three or four, but what that span was like after that first one and like breaking the world records and winning all those gold medals. And then what would that was like happen to? Did you feel like you could be done after that or did you want to go for more? Then after you got more in the next one, were you near the record? And so was that your obligation to keep training to try to break the record? You try to beat out Mark Spitz? Was that your goal? Or were you just trying to do whatever you could? Yeah. And then what was your life? Because during that 16, like everybody knew your name. Like you were Mr. Gold, you were the most highly decorated Olympian.

So much so that they took a picture of you ripping a giant bong at a party. But that's the thing, is that's what kind of brought you down. Is that's what had a bunch of your sponsors back off on you and you kind of like, you could have had a much more illustrious, maybe not even like competing again, but your name would be looked upon much more favorably. That got so much, like, reporting that I think that that definitely negatively impacted his career and just to kind of find out like, what does that feel like now that it's so common,

but everyone made such a huge deal out of that, especially considering that, like, that's not going to enhance your performance. You were doing it in the gap of a four-year period in which you were training for the Olympics. Like, were people looking to just try to shatter, like, the myth? And I'm not saying he's not a fault for stuff and everything, because you've got to, you know, if you're that famous,

you kind of got to watch out for your image and everything, so that, you know, fault is like there. But it'd just be interesting to see what it was like, that rise and then kind of that fall. And how you feel becoming a weed smoking legend. Yeah. And now all of a sudden, like, people that don't give a shit are just like, yeah, he was probably fucking sore after workouts and shit. He was having to eat 10,000 calories a day. You think, like, you don't need some assistance in making you hungry or being able to eat?

For as many people were shitting on him for what he was doing. there was a large swath of people that realized why he was doing it. I wonder why he has it tried to pull off a marijuana deal, like a sponsorship. He probably does at some point. I would, why would you not? That's a natural progression for him. All right. On to dead people.

First? Yeah. Okay. I went with Leonardo da Vinci. That's a deep. You're getting into some real philosophical conversations. And I assumed that I assumed in writing this that there would be no communication barrier. It would just be able to occur like we could understand each other perfectly.

Just two bros having a good time. It's pretty short on for him. I would just want to know how his thought process worked to be apparently so far ahead in thought and technology and what was possible between like human anatomy and, you know, his flying devices. and all these inventions that he was responsible for. On top of that, not just his mind working toward invention and figuring out problems and solutions, but then also being like a very talented, like, artist. Like, how did those two influence each other? Yeah.

But also then be able to talk to him if he could see our society now as being like, did you ever envision anything like that? Oh, and look, your painting is still highly protected. And was she smiling? Was she not smiling? Is this a dude? Is it not a dude? like there's been so much talk about it.

Oh, by the way, people still try to throw shit on it. Causely, yeah. You have a couple movies called the DaVinci Code. Would you mind weighing in on these? We're going to sit down and watch them. I'm going to live stream them. That's a good pick. He would be, you just have endless questions

or you would probably show them like modern stuff today. 45 minutes in, I'm probably like, dude, you're talking like even though you're 300 years more advanced than you or however long it's been, like you're talking fucking circles around me. I need you to dumb it down. Pretend I'm the Pope. Bring it to my level. And you're trying to explain it to me. Yes. I went pretty much on par philosophically with you.

I chose Chris Farley. I would more than anything just want to see him with the lights off and with the cameras off and see just kind of what kind of a person he was if he still felt like you needed to turn it on from everything that I've seen. He being Tommy Boy was a very influential movie as a kid. And same thing with Black Sheep. It was basically, it felt like the same movie. They just kind of rehashed it.

Him and David Spades back and forth was great. But just his level of funny and slapstick and physical comedy, I hope that he probably didn't bring a lot of that into his personal life because it would take a toll being the funny, fat guy all the time. Oh, yeah. Especially his level of energy that he had. Well, I mean, you've heard people talk about it now. I mean, even like people talk about like Robin Williams and stuff,

feeling like he had to be on a lot of the time to meet the expectation. And then Jim Carrey has said the kind of something similar. He's like, I feel like there was a certain point in my life where I always had to be movie Jim Carrey or presentable Jim Carrey. And he's like, it's just, it's so taxing. And those are guys that were able to do it linguistically, whereas, Chris Farley was so much physical. He was, yeah, he was like an act, like, as big as he was and everything. His ability for physical comedy was just, like, he could have been, he could have been great with either the physical or the way he acting, his acting, his actual, like, you know, lines and everything.

But he had the combination of both of them. Just the perfect combination. And it's like, you want to talk to him about, like, what was it about, like, you saw the roadmap to, like, you saw the roadmap to, like, destruction with Belushi, but that was still like your roadmap. Like you knew where it was going to lead. You had contact with you. You knew where this whole thing was going to take you. But there was just something about it that was so, whether it was medicating or.

Well, it's better. It's better to burn out than fade. Is it that mentality the better, it's better to burn out than fade away? Yeah. I could see that. He just, there's so many stories. I guess Bob Oden Kirk had written a book lately. I don't know if it was in the last couple months,

but he even makes reference to the night when he saw Chris Farley in the back of the limousine and Chris Farley kind of knew that the end was coming and Odenkirk knew that this was probably going to be the last time that he was going to see Chris Farley. It wasn't a surprise when it happened to anybody that knew him. And that's such a bummer to know that you have somebody so close and that's so just a good person.

And at that point, being funny is the least biggest attribute that you're looking for out of a person. You just want their health to be good, but he just, up until the end, he was so great. And, you know, being that guy, everyone expected, you know, maybe or maybe he had the expectation of himself. It was probably both, but that everything had to be funnier. Yep.

He always had to be funnier. There was always a boundary that he had to push in that and see how far he could get. I'd love to know where he thinks that he would fit in today. Yeah. Like, would he have tried to get skinny and go? skinny Jonah Hill where it was less funny Would he have leaned into it more? Would he have been in grownups with Adam Sandler?

Like where would he have played? How many more David's fate teamups would we have gotten? Yeah, dude. That would have been, I think, a whole series of movies. It's like the Kevin Hart, Rott, or Dwayne Johnson team of. You could have had that. You could have crushed everything. Who did you have as your honorable mention?

My honorable mention is Ben Franklin because I got a lot of questions. There's a lot of things about the way that the country was made. And if it was made more of a haphazard manner than it seems like, and just some of his escapades and going over to France and all the shit that he had done in his life. When did you guys intend, like, new shit to be written? Like, did you guys have just the automatic assumption that people would be smart enough

once things were out of date to just go ahead and start making changes, which we did make changes, but minor. We made minor changes, but, like, I'm talking about changes to the things that people think. think are unchangeable and just kind of find out be like what was your guys' intention? Was this a 25 year plan and then we revisit it? Was this supposed to just live on in perpetuity? Was there somebody in charge

of like sounding the alarm being like, hey everyone it's time to go ahead and get back together and fix this and that person got like the scurvy and died or some shit? Yeah, were there new inventions that you guys were seeing and you thought hey maybe we need to go update what we believe now because we have this new look on life?

Yeah. Would you have? I had Alexander the Great. It'd be fun. Yeah. I just, just kind of stepping into the mindset and being like, what, what's the feeling like when you don't know,

like you have something in you that's like, I don't know what's over there, but let's go fucking conquer it. Yeah. Just blindly, just let's keep going. And then you go conquer something, and then there's still nothing in the distance.

And you're like, well, fuck it, keeps going. Okay, let's go conquer that. And to be able to, you know, I'm sure there was a healthy dose of servitude in there between his army and everything.

but also somehow have like the faith and your soldiers and your commanders belief in you that everything that you're telling them is just like I guess we're doing it. He'd be a fun hang because everything would just be free. It would all be. Oh, yeah. You could do anything that you wanted. I'm sure he would probably be. You want a tiger?

Yeah. Yeah, he won't. I got tigers, man. You liked the way these guys are working? You want to take them home with you? Yeah. Is that a... Like I'm more guys.

Yeah, I got endless amounts of guys. What do you think in this city? You like this city? Oh, okay. Before we get to the last one, which we'll probably talk about for a bit, I got a pee. Okay. All right. Fictional characters.

I think it's you first. Yeah, this one's going to get, uh, we're getting young. Wait, we're getting young, like, or we're going back? Uh, a little from column A, a little from column B. Okay. Um, my fictional character, the, uh, my fictional character, the, uh, my fictional character that, I would like to smoke marijuana with would be Winnie the Pooh.

Winnie the Pooh lived such a little magical life where I mean, the guy would just I could send him a talking bear. Like talking bear wearing a cute little shirt Like me. A talking stuffed bear.

Not even a, it's a TED situation. He's got his own house. So you're probably not crashing at your place if he gets too stoned. He gets the munchies. We're going to find the closest tree to crawl up there and he's going to get us some honey. Guy is synonymous with getting his head stuck in honeypots. So you're always going to have the physical comedy aspect that you would have.

He broke so many honey pots. And then he would just take his fist covered with honey and just suck on his fist. But he was a stuffed animal. So it was like he was written mittens. It was just the thumbs and then the... It was perfect. Yeah. He had a whole bunch.

He had a whole cast of characters and other just kind of funny people that you can go hang out with. He or was not funny. He was just fucking depressed. Eeyore is... If anything Eeyore needs to smoke. Yeah. And maybe that's it.

Maybe he's a straight lace buddy that doesn't like to hang out with. Piglet definitely got in. He was an edible guy. At what point do you address him not wearing pants ever? Are you like... I know you're usually hanging out with your buddies and I don't know what flies.

Some of your buddies don't even wear clothes. Eeyer wears like a bow on his tail, maybe like something on his neck. Yeah. But other than that, like, what's your guys' policy? Is it because you're stuffed animals? You're already kind of wearing pants? or well and you just wanted that's what you want to do it at his place too because you don't want him

sitting bare-ass bear bear bear-bear-ass bear bear bear on your furniture it's it's not a clean healthy thing where does the honey go man yeah how do how do you do you do you do you think it's weird that you have a little kid friend named Christopher robin that hangs out like how old are you I would just want to hear his voice when he was told me like I'm trying to think of it was a kind of a, uh-huh. Yeah. Adam.

I can't even do it. Like, I can hear it in my head, though. But, like, it would just be so, like, I feel like, you could be like, tell me a story, Winnie the Pooh. And you could just lay back and close your eyes. And it just, it's this higher pitch, silky voice. This one time.

Yeah, just non-threatening. It's the safest voice ever. He would be a very comfortable hang. Yes. You would be able to just snuggle up. That's the other thing. Complete relaxation. Oh.

you can just cuddle with him. He would be so soft. You'd have a belly full of honey. He'd protect you from all the bees. I see you just sitting there in Winnie the Pooh's hat, and he's got you laying on his lap, and he's got a honey pot next to him, and he just keeps dipping his paw on the honey. And then it's often he'll eat some honey. And then the next dip, he'll reach it down to your mouth, and you'll just suckle honey off his tiny first honey-covered paw. And we would just have the best time.

I'd definitely be the big spoon for a little bit, but then eventually if I got a little bit chilly, I'd rotate and he'd be the little spoon or he'd be the big spoon on me and it would just be so much fun to go hang out in their little mythical world and go get into hijinks and go fuck with the ore and pull out one of his sticks

from his little lean tooth that he made. Now you're just being fucking mean. I think you'd like it. I think you'd get him. Like, oh well, I knew this was going to happen someday. All right. I went with Dumbledore from Harry Potter. Quality?

Yes. He's a wizard. Yep. So there's just a lot of, like... He's got some good shit. Oh, yeah. And his smoking devices are top tier as well. I think...

I do want to say that there has been, at least in the books, situations where he was smoking me out of a pipe. And I would definitely expect Dumbledore not to have anything trash. No. The other thing, too, is, you know, you pretty much have zero knowledge

of the Harry Potter universe, correct? Uh... cursory a little bit. So I understand Hermione a lot. So when he was growing up, he was friends and then became lovers with this other guy who turned into this like super, he was like the Voldemore before. Dumbledore?

Yeah. Okay. Voldemore before Voldemore. And so he ended up fighting him and then finds out that this other evil wizard that only he can beat. But then guess what? This kid comes along whose parents get murdered. And all of a sudden he knows at some point that this kid

has to die for the evil wizard to die. So then I'm like, hey, dude, where do you, where does your mindset go? You're about to, there's, this like 15 year old kid. You're going to send a giant man with a big grizzled beard on a motorcycle to fly to his people's houses. And that's going to be his first introduction. Is that his first introduction to the wizarding world? Yeah, like he gets dropped off as a baby at his aunt and uncle's house, which is

questionable to say at least because they're horrible people. And they make him live. He has to be there because there's protection or some shit. And, yeah, but he, oh, and he's also lived for like 190 years. Dumbledore? Yeah. So, and, like, you're probably smoking a blunt, and he's, like, sticking out his magic wand with a flame at the end of it to like your blonde. The wand turns into, like, some magic elaborate pipe.

Yeah. And then his phoenix comes down and dips its feather in it to light it. Yeah. And that's how he does his thing. And you're probably munching down on some Burt Bot's beans. Oh, you've got the, if you're at Hoggwar. you've got the entire elf kitchen. Anything that you want just magically appears on the table.

An elf kitchen, huh? Yeah, they just make all the food. Huh. And then it magically. So, like, I could be like, I'm tired of this roast chicken. Can I get some fruit and all of a sudden? And then you can just, whatever, keeps popping up on the table. He's got some invisible cloak that he can throw on so he can do, like, different magic tricks to you while you're high and really blow your mind.

I don't want him to, I want him in front of me the whole time. I'm already in a dangerous wizarding environment and I'm not magical, so. you don't want to have to file some sort of HR complaint with Hogwarts because Dumbledore's in the invisibility cloak Yeah, I could see that that to me seems like a world that just Just magic like any any type of magical character like stepping into that world You would need marijuana to be comfortable there Oh yeah

You'd just have to be high to accept what was going on because if you weren't your regular brain would be asking so many questions I just pull it out and he's like what's that I'm like oh this is marijuana And he's like, oh, that's as close to magic as your people will get. He's like, yeah, we actually gave that to you guys years and years ago, just to kind of give you a taste. Am I going to see some shit? You're going to see some shit. You're going to want to smoke a little bit more. What was your audible mention?

Mine was actually sticking with the bear theme, strangely enough, was Ted from Ted. Yeah. That would be great to have just a lovable Teddy Ruspin. I wouldn't have to worry about offending it. Like, I would feel like I was going to offend Winnie the Pooh. If I started, like, getting really in depth being like, so, man, like, you've been at this for like, you know, like 70 years and like, does this kid not age? Or is it like the kid's kid just generationally? And like you like at some point, you're going to start falling apart.

Like, how are you in such good condition? I feel much more comfortable talking to a fucking bear from Boston. With a good, yeah, good Boston accent. Oh, yeah. Of course. It would have to be that character, yes. Yeah. Teddy would be a solid pick.

just watching the movies and getting a little bit of the knowledge that we have of him. And Teddy Ruxpins were like a real thing back then, weren't they? Yes, I had a Teddy Ruxbin. Really? Yeah. I had a Teddy Ruxpin long enough to where he was battle damaged Teddy Ruxman. Really? At some point, I poked his eye out somehow, so then I tied headband and gauze around the eye,

and then some other shit broke. Because he used to add the tape recorder in his chest, and you would flip him around on the back would be the cassette, and then he would tell you his stories. But it got to the point where he looked like a fucking zombie. and like the mouth would still work on the tapes except it would be distorted and he'd be like Rha-w-r-r-r-r-r-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

But as a child, what better dream could you have than your favorite toy growing up becoming a real-life thing? Oh yeah, there was a cartoon that went along with it. It was a Saturday morning cartoon. You would wake up, grab Teddy Ruxpin, go watch Teddy Ruxpin with Teddy Ruxbin. That's marketing genius.

And that guy grows up with you. That guy goes through high school with you. He, if you go to college or whatever, And then he's just like an adult buddy that you'll always have. The fact that I'm, and I'm wondering kind of how the tapes work, because they would have had to give commands for the mouth to move to at least stick along with when they're talking.

Man, I'm wondering if you had a Teddy Ruckspin, a fully functional Teddy Ruxbin, if there's something about any other cassette tapes, if you put in like ECDC, and there was something about the way that it, the tape hit that would have it move its mouth. Yeah. So it would be fucking yelling Brian Johnson at you.

There was some MK Ultra shit that they were plugging into the radio cassettes for the kids. Teddy Ruxman just that's what decodes it You don't even hear what's on the tape It's just like President John F. Kennedy has to go It wasn't that far back But I'm saying like

You could plug it into a regular cassette player And it would just be like normal music He just starts talking Russian Yeah You're just like Disinformation campaigned left and right All right Who'd you have is your honorable

I went Probably in the same realm of being a kid Snuffelufus from Sesame Street That guy was always high Yes, he was. The big red elephant. Was he purple or red, something like that. Oh, but he always had...

Now I'm starting to think he was orange. He always had the bloodshot eyes. You could always tell that he was high. And he lived in a certain block on Sesame Street that seemed like it would be a little bit more rough and tumble than the regular area. He was like a brownish orange. Like, and he was a woolly mammoth. Oh, that's right. But man, yes, he definitely looks like big old eyelashes.

His tongue always hanging. out of his mouth. That guy's seen some shit. And that guy, he's, if something goes wrong and you get pinched by the cops, he's not going to say anything. He's, he's a ride or die guy. Snuffy's high-telling it out of there as soon as shit goes down. Oh yeah. I'm telling you right now. He's gone, but he's also like just a great person to hang out with because he's never going to take stuff too seriously. He's never going to be energetic. He's probably going to be so encouraging to you with like your problems and if you're not feeling great. He's going to be like, what's wrong? Just a great listener.

Any, your theme tends to be cuddly. Because this, well, while you're having to barely cuddle with poo, you could just like lay, you could use snuff luffagus as a bed. And just lay him down and cuddle up against him? Him and I get to, pull his trunk over you. Yeah, dude, him and I get to walk down Sesame Street together. We get to see a big yellow bird walking around. We get to see Bert and Ernie, who were very odd, a very odd pairing.

You get to go see Count Dracula. Was Kermit a part of? No, Kermit wasn't. He was, I don't know if, is that he said, Jim Henson? I think they both were Jim Henson. Yeah, but they kept him kind of separate. Oh. But there was Grover and Oscar.

Yeah, you get to go down and see Oscar the Grouch and he's being an asshole and you can throw him back in his trash can. See, I think he's just a victim of circumstances, man. You think he's just angry because of where he is? Yeah. I think he's had a rough life. I feel like if anybody is like the Vietnam vet. Oh, Sesame Street, it's fucking, yeah, it's Oscar, man. He looks like he's seen some shit.

Oh, yeah, and you get hungry, you get the munchies. You just go hang out with the cookie monster. You have to be on your guard the whole time with the cookie monster because he's going to steal your shit, but he's always got cookies. I see you walking down Sesame Street, and you literally have, like, cookies, and all of a sudden you look down in Cookie Monsters just eating them all out of your hand, and you're just like, what the fuck? Yeah, I had plans for that.

He's like, oh, cookies. Just always stealing everything from you. I he would, Sesame Street, the world in and of itself would be just a fun place to hang out. It's just so innocent, carefree. Yep. And you don't have to question anything because you know where you are at that point. That's true. No one's going to hurt, it's a safe place.

No one's going to hurt Sean Sesame Street. That's the best place to do drugs. You're going to lose your cookies and then guess what? He's going to feel bad and he's going to go make more cookies and it's going to be the lesson of the day. Or he's going to bring you cookie dough. Yeah. Ultimately at that point may be better. Yeah.

Yeah. It'd be a fun little world to live in. All right, man. anything else? Well, I think it's all. All right. Later, folks. Peace.

All right, guys. Hey, thank you so much for making it through another episode and sticking with us. If you want to kind of follow up on the next upcoming episodes, get some teasers. Adam, can they get us on the Twitter? You can get us on the Twitter. Our Twitter handle is historically high. That's historically H.I. Nice.

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Peace.