History That Doesn't Suck - 17: Death of a Nation's Father

Episode Date: May 28, 2018

“I die hard, but I am not afraid to go.” This is the story of death and (another) revolution. The French Revolution means the end for King Louis XVI’s life. As his royal blood stains a Parisian square, the fallout of revolution in France is hitting George Washington hard; France is going to war against Britain! America is in no condition for war, but should George stand by his French allies? And with its regime change, is France still an ally? Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson couldn’t disagree more on the matter as a troublesome French diplomat, Citizen Genêt, exacerbates the feud between their respective political factions. But Louis XVI isn’t the only head of state leaving us in this episode. After explaining his views on slavery and their lifelong evolution, it’s time to say goodbye to George. This won’t be easy. Tissue is advisable. ____ Connect with us on HTDSpodcast.com and go deep into episode bibliographies and book recommendations join discussions in our Facebook community get news and discounts from The HTDS Gazette  come see a live show get HTDS merch or become an HTDS premium member for bonus episodes and other perks. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Is that Naughty Lister? Naughty Lister? Dwayne Johnson. We got snowmen! Chris Evans. I might just go back to the car. Let's save Christmas. I'm not gonna say that.

Say it. Alright. Let's save Christmas. There it is. Only in theaters November 15th. Welcome to History That Doesn't Suck. I'm your professor, Greg Jackson, and as in the classroom, my goal here is to make rigorously researched history come to life as your storyteller. Each episode is the result of laborious research with no agenda other than making the past come to life as you learn. If you'd like to help support this work, receive ad-free episodes, bonus content,

and other exclusive perks, I invite you to join the HTDS membership program. Sign up for a seven-day free trial today at htdspodcast.com slash membership, or click the link in the episode notes. Welcome to History That Doesn't Suck. I'm your professor, Greg Jackson, and I'd like to tell you a story. A dark green horse-drawn carriage moves slowly through the streets of Paris amid thick fog and intermittent rain. Armed guards standing four men deep line its three-mile route. Another 1,200 foot soldiers and hundreds of cavalry escort the carriage as 60 drummers keep this veritable army marching in time. I realize this might seem a bit extreme, but inside that carriage is the king of France, Louis XVI.

And you have to take all the precaution in the world when you execute your own king. Three men ride inside the carriage with Louis. Lieutenant Lebrasse and a sergeant are across from him, while Louis' loyal confessor, an Irish Catholic priest named Henry Edgeworth, sits by his side. Not a soul speaks a word. And with all of Paris' doors and windows firmly shut, only the monotonous sound of drums and soldiers' thudding boots reach his majesty's ears. Not that he's listening. Throughout the nearly two-hour carriage ride,

Louis resolutely prepares for death by reading from Psalms. But I have to wonder, does his mind drift back to last night when he briefly reunited with his family and told them he would be executed in the morning? Oh, how he and his wife, Marie-Antoinette, and their two children wept as they embraced and kissed each other for the last time. When he closes his eyes now, does he see his poor teenage daughter, Marie-Thérèse, in his mind's eye,

fainting from sheer terror and devastation at their parting? Or does Louis picture the cherubic face of his six-year-old boy, Louis-Charles, stained with tears and overcome with sobs as he processes the fact that his daddy will be killed tomorrow. The boy sat between Louis' knees only 12 hours ago. You know, he's Louis' heir too. Le dauphin de France. At least Louis' death means he won't ever know his heir, his son, will suffer abuse at the hands of his jailers and die by the time he's only 10. Maybe Louis is avoiding all these thoughts. Maybe that's why he's so intent on reading from Psalms.

I can't tell you which translation he has, but let's go with Isaac Lemaitre's Catholic and French translation. Perhaps Psalm 23. Le Seigneur est mon pasteur. Je ne puis manquer de rien. Il me fait reposer en d'excellents pasteurages. At 10 a.m., the carriage arrives at its final destination. Place de la Révolution.

In the 21st century, it'll be known as Place de la Concorde and be filled with fountains, statues, and most notably, an ancient Egyptian obelisk that will be gifted to France by the Viceroy of Egypt, Muhammad Ali, in the 19th century. Today though, January 21st, 1793, only two things adorn the square. One, a large empty pedestal where a statue honoring Louis XV sat until revolutionaries recently tore it down. And two, a scaffold with a guillotine. And it's here, only a few yards away from the empty pedestal that once honored his grandfather, that Louis will die in 22 minutes. Determined to die well, Louis confidently steps out of the carriage and

into the humid cold. Murmurs spread across the crowd of 20,000 citoyens gathered to witness this morning's regicide. Though in truth, they can barely see Louis. The gendarmes guarding him are so numerous, it's really hard to catch a glimpse. Three executioners grab at his majesty. He pushes them off. They mean to take his coat. He'll have none of that. He doesn't need these nameless assassins. Louis removes his coat and unbuttons his collar himself. New outrage sets in though when they try to bind Louis' hands. He did not expect this humiliation. Thankfully for everyone's sake, including the king's, his faithful confessor Edgeworth de-escalates the situation

by assuring Louis these final humiliations will only make his execution a greater similitude of the death of the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. With this thought alone, Louis consents. The king ascends the scaffold steps with difficulty. It's only six feet off the ground, but the stairs are steep and Louis struggles to find his balance with his hands tied behind his back. Again, Edgeworth is there for him, letting the king lean on him with each step. Upon reaching the top, this man of God continues to speak religious comfort to Louis while his royal hair is quickly cut away to ensure the guillotine finds his neck with precision. All is prepared. Louis now boldly stands at the front of the scaffold. He means to address the

20,000 spectators. With one look at the drummers, his royal glare brings them to a stop. Then, he speaks. Dieu, que le sang que vous allez repeindre ne retourne jamais sur la France. He says more, but we don't know what. General Santel denies his once king any last words. The order is given for the drummers to recommence, drowning Louis out. The king is now bound on a plank, which is slid into place with his head secured in a stock that places his neck in line with the guillotine's blade.

Fils de Saint-Louis, ascendez au ciel! calls out Edgeworth. The famed and once royal executioner Charles-Henri Saint-Saëns now lets the 12-inch thick angular blade fall and... Vive la République! Vive la Liberté! Some cry out as Sanson, on top of the scaffold, holds Louis' decapitated head by the hair for all to see. The crowd presses forward, pushing past the armed guards.

Some are bloodthirsty, literally. They dip handkerchiefs or their fingers in their decapitated sovereign's blood, taste it, and joke that it's well salted. Mmm, il est bourrement salé! Others buy locks of the dead king's hair, while another group dances around the scaffold, spontaneously singing La Marseillaise. Allons enfants de la patrie,

le jour de gloire est arrivé! Today's story is George Washington's second presidential term and final years at Mount Vernon. But in truth, we could just as easily say it's the story of the French Revolution making George's life a living hell. As a troublemaking French ambassador figuratively throws gas and a lit match on, well, everything. We'll see America avoid getting sucked into a war between France and Britain. The conflict between Alexander Hamilton's and Thomas Jefferson's political factions increase. New conflicts on the frontier, and even new treaties with Britain and Spain. This second term is busy, but after all that, it's time to say goodbye to George. I'll explain George's views on slavery, which are evolving even in his final years, but then we'll lay him to rest.

This one's a tearjerker. Got your tissue? Just remember, I warned you. Okay then, here we go. On March 4th, 1793, George takes the oath to uphold the U.S. Constitution as president once again. It's a very simple event. He gives a 135-word speech and swears the oath in Philadelphia's Congress Hall. Yeah, that's it. Things have changed since George's first oath. Americans, especially Thomas Jefferson's groupies, known increasingly as Republicans, are enthralled with the French Revolution.

Like George's presidency, it began in 1789. Ironically, its main cause, King Louis XVI's government going broke, was exacerbated by the cost of helping America fight for independence. Anyhow, many Americans feel a bond with revolutionary France. They see the spirit of 76 there. Americans love hearing about a new constitution ending Louis' absolute rule. And in this zeitgeist, we now have Americans hating on any ceremony or pomp, all of which is now associated with monarchy. That's why George's second inauguration is such a drab affair. Better to keep it Spartan than get attacked in the National Gazette.

Again. But indirectly increasing American distaste for ceremony is a trivial impact. The French Revolution now has George Washington trying to avoid getting sucked into a war between Britain and France. See, last year, in 1792, the French Revolution hit what we historians like to call its radical phase. We're going to stay light on the details here, but suffice it to say, the radical phase is when the French Revolution went from, hey, let's tamp down the king's absolute power with a constitution and a legislature elected by landowners to let's give the vote to all men. Also, let's purge the enemies within, guillotine or otherwise execute them. You think I'm joking? Just Google September massacres. And as a part of that purge, King Louis, sorry they took his title, Louis Capet,

got guillotined, as we heard at the opening of today's episode on January 21st, 1793. But the radical phase also upsets European kingdoms that aren't cool with les Français downgrading and eventually killing their king. These other monarchs don't want their subjects getting any ideas, if you know what I mean. So France goes to war, first against Austria and Prussia. Then, in early 1793, Britain and Spain join the fight. And America learns of this new Anglo-French war shortly after George's second inauguration. Ah, freak. Welcome to term two, George. France's and Britain's war just put freak. Welcome to term two, George. France's and Britain's war

just put America between a rock and a hard place. For one thing, Britain is America's main trading partner. 90% of federal funds come from duties on British imports. So best not to piss off Britain. But at the same time, America is officially allied with France

through two treaties. But wait, France has a new government, so does America have obligations? But if it does, America has no navy and little by way of an army. So which side should it choose? George wants to go with option C. Neither. Our flustered president summons Thomas, Alexander, Henry Knox, and Edmund Randolph for an emergency cabinet meeting to tackle this at his Philadelphia home on April 18th.

The number one question is if they can or should issue a proclamation of neutrality. The Constitution says the president needs the, quote, advice and consent, close quote, of the Senate to act on foreign affairs. But the Senate's out of session and time is of the essence. Crap. What does that mean? The next 12 questions are specific to France. Like, do old treaties apply to the new regime? Should America welcome the new ambassador? I'll cut to the quick on the meeting's outcome. Alex and Tom disagree on a number of points. I know, big shocker, but in the end, both win victories. Alex, who's cool-headed or

cold-hearted logic, leans towards Britain, gets his way with the cabinet deciding that, yes, it is constitutional and right for George to issue a proclamation of neutrality. Although for international law and treaty reasons, they'll avoid the word neutrality, this is the statement's real meaning. Tom, who goes along with the proclamation but questions if the president has authority to issue this without Congress, wins with the decision to accept the new French government's ambassador without reservation. So, on April 22nd, 1793, George sets another presidential precedent by issuing the Neutrality Proclamation. And it's a cute effort, but it's

not going to stop the French Revolution from putting America through the wringer. Now, for you to appreciate how bad this is going to get, we need to make sure you're clear on those two political parties forming under Thomas and Alexander, because this is going to break along partisan lines. First, we have Tom's crew. They tend to call themselves Republicans, but sometimes historians and poli-sci types prefer to call them Democratic Republicans or Jeffersonian Republicans. And quick note, no, this is not the same Republican party that exists today. That's another half a century away from being created. Anyhow, a number of the anti-federalists who fought against the Constitution become Jeffersonian Republicans. So not surprisingly, they push for states' rights and small central government.

As I told you in the last episode, they also believe in agrarianism, which they see as more virtuous than free enterprise despite a frequent reliance on slavery. And in 1793, the French Revolution gives the Republicans a boost by inspiring the formation of pro-French democratic Republican societies. In fact, a number of chapters are formed as the new French ambassador, who you'll meet in just a bit, passes through American towns.

These clubs make toasts to French revolutionary leaders, refer to France as America's sister republic, and hate the neutrality proclamation. As you'll see, these Democratic-Republican societies are going to stir up serious trouble for George. At the same time that these Jeffersonian Republican clubs are developing, the Federalists, with a capital F, begin to coalesce as a party. Unlike the Republicans, Federalists support a vigorous central government. Hamiltonian economic policies,

which we crushed in the last episode, so I'll trust you understand what I mean, and a broad interpretation of the Constitution. In the first few Congresses, Federalists win most seats, giving them a majority in the House and Senate. In his great disdain for Alex and his Federalists, Tom prefers to merge the words monarchy and aristocrat to call them monocrats. Yeah, that's right, Tom has a celebrity name for them. And while the Federalists have no interest in monarchy, as the Republicans claim, they are down to steal Britain's best ideas, like the Bank of England, and do it better, but with American and Republican flair. Basically, they see America as the Coca-Cola to Britain's Pepsi, and no, Pepsi's not okay. Recognizing America's reliance on trade with the ex-mother country, the Federalists remain pro-British

during the French Revolution's craziness. Now, one final clarification. Don't make the mistake of thinking the Federalists are the party of the wealthy elite merchants because they support a strong central government and a robust mercantile economy. Nor do you want to make the mistake of thinking the Republicans are the party of the common people because they push a small government agrarian agenda. These are common errors, and of course, a little laughable when we stop to remember that slave-owning old-money Thomas Jefferson and James Madison are the Democratic-Republican Party's founders. If anyone's the aristocracy of America, it's these guys.

And just as funny to me, how does the illegitimate immigrant Alexander Hamilton become the face of elitism. But don't flip the script either. The truth is that both parties, which are still nascent and still forming, have members from every rank of society. Alright, now that you're a guru on Tom's pro-French Republicans and Alex's pro-British Federalists, I want to introduce you to the Frenchman who will make things worse between them and be 1793 America's biggest troublemaker. Yes, I did just give him that honor even above Tom and Alex. So let that sink in. This is the one and only Citizen Jeunet. Citizen Jeunet is a true gem in revolutionary France.

Although a part of Louis XVI's court with diplomatic experience in Russia, he's a commoner who tended to get in trouble with his royal employer. For a revolutionary government that needs experienced diplomats, but can't trust those who serve the king loyally, that background alone makes him worth ten times his weight in gold. But furthermore, he's brilliant. This short Frenchman with red hair and a prominent aquiline nose speaks some half a dozen languages, including perfect English. Who better then to send to America?

And being an ardent supporter of the revolution, Edmond Genet wants to emphasize that he is no subject of a king, but the citizen of a republic. So he's going by Citizen Genet. And that's what we'll call him too. Was the Sphinx 10,000 years old? Were there serial killers in ancient Greece and Rome? What were the lives of transgender, intersex, and non-binary people like in the ancient world?

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and wanted to save it for the fireside. But what it actually was, was a warning delivered to the Hessian colonel, letting him know that General George Washington was crossing the Delaware and would soon attack his forces. The next day, when Raw lost the Battle of Trenton and died from two colonial Boxing Day musket balls, the letter was found, unopened in his vest pocket. As someone with 15,000 unread emails in his inbox, I feel like there's a lesson there. Oh well, this is The Constant, a history of getting things wrong. I'm Mark Chrysler. Every episode, we look at the bad ideas, mistakes, and accidents that misshaped our world.

Find us at ConstantPodcast.com or wherever you get your podcasts. Sound familiar? So he's hoping to coerce the Americans into paying their full debt to France up front and work out a better trade deal. But let's focus on the real problem. Citizen Genet intends to meddle in America's foreign affairs. On this point, his goals include inducing American citizens to attack two of the several monarchy-led countries with which France is now at war, Spain and Britain. To hurt Spain, the Frenchman hopes to raise an American army to attack Spanish Florida or Spanish Louisiana. To hurt Britain, Citizen Jeunet wants to enlist

Americans as privateers to attack British ships. In case you aren't familiar with this concept, privateers are pirates. Think Blackbeard, Henry Morgan, and Ambani. Or if you want to get fictional, think Robert Louis Stevenson's Treasure Island or Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean. But here's the difference. They are pirates with permission to pillage from a legitimate government. Sir Francis Drake is a famous example of this, as he ravaged Spanish ships and ports with English Queen Elizabeth I's blessing. Get the picture? So, Citizen Jeunet hopes to get American sailors to attack British ships on the Francis Drake model. And to accomplish this, the Frenchman has a sack filled to the

brim with blank letters of marque to enlist Americans as French-sponsored privateers. Making the transatlantic voyage aboard the Embuscade, Citizen Jeunet disembarks at Charleston, South Carolina on April 8, 1793. The people treat him like a rock star. They toast him at banquets. The governor declares that the state of South Carolina officially backs France in the war. So I guess we're still grasping state and federal roles under that whole new constitution thing, huh? And right off the bat, Citizen Jeunet starts handing out those letters of marque to willing American sailors like candy.

As the ambassador slowly makes his way to the U.S. capital of Philadelphia, throngs of pro-French Americans meet him in city after city. All along the way, he inspires the founding of more pro-French Democratic Republican clubs. And with all of this popularity, Citizen Jeunet is becoming more and more convinced that he can pretty much ignore old man Washington's silly little government. He's talking straight to the people. Yeah, his revolutionary ways are showing. Citizen Jeunet arrives in Philly on May 18th. French and American flags fly side by side. At a huge banquet soon organized, Americans sing La Marseillaise. This is all a boon to the pro-French Jeffersonian Republicans.

As most Americans dig the French Revolution, this pushes more people toward the Republican faction. Tom is thrilled, he writes to James Madison, that France's war with England, quote, has kindled and brought forward the two parties with an ardor which our own interests merely could never excite, close quote. But let's also point out, this is awful for the very government Secretary of State Jefferson serves. Vice President John Adams now keeps guns in his home for self-protection. Years from now, he'll write to Tom, quote, you certainly never felt the terrorism excited by Jeunet in 1793,

when 10,000 people in the streets of Philadelphia, day after day, threatened to drag Washington out of his house and effect a revolution in the government or compel it to declare war in favor of the French Revolution. Close quote. John being John, I'm sure he's exaggerating, but the point stands. Okay, now in Philly, Citizen Jeunet finally gets around to presenting himself as the new French ambassador to the president.

To quote him, We wish you to do nothing but what is for your own good, says the very Frenchman driving further divisions between Federalists and Republicans, trying to build a private army to fight Spain, and handing out privateering letters of marque. George is taciturn but polite with these citoyens. And so convinced of his own popularity and ability to appeal directly to the people rather than deal with George, the self-important Frenchman doesn't even grasp that the American president made no overtures. this illegal. And what's worse, this privateering gives Britain the impression America is backing France in the war. As the uncontested naval power, Britain's already seizing all American merchant ships carrying anything that could possibly help its French enemy, which basically

means all American ships it comes across. Operating like this, Britain will seize about 300 American ships this year alone and frequently force American sailors who can't prove their citizenship on the spot, so basically all of them, to either join the British crew or die. So given that fun fact, I'm sure you can appreciate why George is adamantly opposed to citizen Jeunet recruiting privateers. Furthermore, George will not revoke the neutrality stance, pay debts to France up front, nor renegotiate any treaties. Ah, but Thomas disagrees with George, so he'll get friendly with the French Republican. He won't say this during a cabinet meeting, but Tom sees the recruiting of Americans as French privateers as legal. He also supports Citizen Jeunet's plan to raise an army to attack Spanish Louisiana,

going so far as to make small moves to help. But at the same time, Tom urges Citizen Jeunet to be patient. Don't do anything rash, like commission more privateers right after George made it clear he thinks that's illegal. But alas, the French ambassador lacks the diplomatic skills to follow Tom's advice. Maybe the French revolutionary government should have thought harder about why Citizen Jeunet tended to get in trouble with Louis' diplomatic corps. I mean, was he really that avant-garde, or did he just suck at his job? Citizen Genet sucks at his job. While George is out of town, the Frenchman commissions yet another ship to privateer,

La Petite Démocrate, the Little Democrat. When George gets back to Philadelphia, he meets with his cabinet, and they forbid it to sail. Citizen Genet will have none of it. In knowing defiance of U.S. law, he sees to it that La Petite Démocrate sets sail on July 12th. And angry Alexander wants this French ambassador recalled.

Tout de suite. Oh, how this little Frenchman has made a mess of American politics. Angry pro-French Americans are demonstrating in the streets of Philadelphia. The leaders of both political factions, Tom and Alex, are frustrated and convinced they aren't getting their way enough and want out of government. On June 21st, Alex tells George he wants to resign when the congressional session ends a year from now.

A month later, Tom gives his notice of wanting to quit state. To be clear, neither is leaving immediately, but George is a bit freaked. How can two of America's best minds quit him at the same damn time? Meanwhile, the bickering duo take their fight to the newspapers again. In May, Tom's hired editorial gun, Philip Frenot, hits the president hard enough in the National Gazette that a pissed off George asks his Secretary of State to please fire this guy. But Tom won't. The sage of Monticello is convinced Frenot's work is that of a patriot. Well, fine. Alex has a pen and he's not afraid to use it. Under the pseudonym Pacificus, this wordsmithing West Indian writes seven op-eds defending the neutrality proclamation and

the pro-British Federalist views on the war between France and Britain, as well as the French Revolution. Ugh, Tom hates Alexander's well-argued prose. He urges James Madison to fight back. Quote, nobody answers him and his doctrines will therefore be taken for confessed. For God's sake, my dear sir, take up your pen, select the most striking heresies, and cut him to pieces in the face of the public. Close quote. Reluctantly, little Jemmy writes five articles of his own, signing with the name of Vidius. By the way, Alex is so proud of his Pacificus articles, he has them included in an 1802 publication of the Federalist Papers. I can't help but wonder, did he get some pleasure out of publishing these letters,

which take his Federalist Papers collaborator, James Madison, to task, in an edition of their co-authored work? Whether he did or not, wow, Alex, that's savage. And as if things aren't bad enough, deathly yellow fever hits Philadelphia that August. In an effort to keep the city calm, George sticks around at first. But as, to quote the president, Mrs. Washington was unwilling to leave me surrounded by the malignant fever. Close quote. He heads back to Mount Vernon to ensure his family's safety on September 10th. The yellow fever cloud has a silver lining though. John Adams says that, given the serious crisis provoked by Citizen Jeunet, quote, nothing but the yellow fever could have saved the United States from a total revolution

in government, close quote. As the disease ravages Philly, pro-French mobs grow quiet. Political societies can't meet. This allows cooler heads to prevail, especially as Americans finally hear about Citizen Jeunet's privateering shenanigans and disrespecting George. With this, the Frenchman's popularity wanes and the people rally behind their president once again. It's time for Citizen Jeunet to go. Even Thomas can't really defend him, and he fulfills his duty as Secretary of State by writing a letter requesting the French diplomats recall to France. Well, the French government is all too happy to oblige. The most radical and violent faction of the French Revolution, les Jacobins, have risen to power since Citizen Jeunet left. And these guillotine-happy leaders, whose time at the helm is so

deadly it will come to be called the Terror, have issued a warrant for Genet's arrest. A humbled Citizen Genet asks for asylum. And George grants it. Even Alexander supports it. They all know returning him would be a death sentence. And so, in the greatest of ironies, this Frenchman who's caused so much trouble for George stays. He becomes a U.S. citizen and marries the daughter of New York's powerful Republican politician, George Clinton, and lives out his days in the Empire State. Well, Citizen Je Genet's antics might be over, but George's problems aren't. Conflicts are brewing on the frontier. Let's get some background. Remember in episode 14 when the peace treaty ending the American Revolutionary War in 1783 granted the United States land out

to the Mississippi River? Well, British soldiers are still occupying forts in part of the western United States, and they won't leave. See, Britain's arguing that, since America hasn't kept up its end of the treaty by paying loyalists for their wartime losses, its troops shouldn't have to vacate forts on the now U.S. frontier. To make matters worse, these British soldiers aren't just hunting and fishing with their buddies. They're supplying American Indians with weapons so they can attack white settlers in the Ohio Valley. Want to learn how you can make smarter decisions with your money? Well, I've got the podcast for you.

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wherever you like to listen. And Spain's playing this game too. In an effort to secure the disputed territory both it and the U.S. claim between the lower half of Georgia and the Mississippi River, Spain is encouraging the Creek Indians to attack nearby settlers. The Spanish also control the Mississippi River, and they're preventing American farmers from using the important waterway to move their goods to market. Between Britain and Spain, Western Americans are desperate. And with little to no help coming from the federal government, I'm sure you can see how they're feeling a bit neglected and in no mood to pay new federal taxes. Ah yes, taxes. Remember that financial plan Alexander Hamilton set up in the last episode? Good, because I'm not explaining that again. Well, the import taxes

collected by the federal government weren't enough to cover the assumption of states' debts. Knowing that Americans are a tax-averse people, Alex asked James Madison for his opinion on which tax option the people would find the most palatable. Now, I know, these two aren't really friends anymore, but this happened just after the infamous Jefferson Dinner Compromise, so James and Alexander were getting along better at the time. Well, little Jemmy suggested that property taxes would never fly with farmers or land speculators, and direct taxes would be met with outright hostility. An excise tax, though, which is more like a duty, that, the two frenemies agreed, might work.

Targeting distilled liquor, Alexander set up a system of tax collectors and distillery inspectors and the tax measure went into effect in July 1791. But this excise tax hits the frontier hard. See, out west, America's favorite distilled spirit, whiskey, isn't just a fast path to liquid courage. Easy to make and light enough for easy transport, western farmers use whiskey as currency. Yeah, let that sink in. Whiskey's the cash of the frontier. Hence this tax's nickname, the whiskey tax. So from the moment this tax is instituted, most distillers won't pay. Violent and destructive protests flare up from north to south, but by 1794, frontiersmen aren't just harassing tax collectors. They're using tar and feathers, or searing the

taxman with hot irons. It's like Boston in the good old days of the stamp tax. I probably don't need to point this out, but it's usually the rougher types who settle the frontier at first. Anyhow, these rebels, or patriots, even attack distillers who choose to pay the tax. That's right, if you're a tax-paying citizen, your neighbors will burn down your barn and destroy your distillery. And what's the main cause of this greater resistance in 1794? The arrival of those democratic-Republican societies in the Alleghenies. I told you these societies would cause trouble. Oh, and thanks, Citizen Jeunet. You're not even in the picture anymore, but you're still causing trouble. All right, you've got the background. Things get really rough in western Pennsylvania that July. Whiskey tax rioters defeat a small group of about 500 regulars near Pittsburgh,

killing two soldiers and burning the home of John Neville, a hated tax collector. Their confidence in numbers grow. Some rebels are talking about breaking off and starting a new nation or collaborating with Spain. Pretty soon, there are over 6,000 whiskey rebels gathered at Braddock's Field on the outskirts of Pittsburgh, and they are threatening to attack the town. George has had enough. He's tried to reason and plead with these distillers

for the past three years. But now he decides this rebellion must be put down with force. Quote, If the laws are to be so trampled on, Now he decides this rebellion must be put down with force. Quote, Close quote. So George puts out a call for militia from Pennsylvania, New Jersey, Maryland, and Virginia, and in September, he leads the army of 12,950 men himself across the Allegheny Mountains. Gives a new meaning to the idea of president being commander-in-chief, right? As the army marches towards Pittsburgh, many rebels

flee into American Indian territory or Canada, but most rebels just sober up and go home. By the time the army arrives, the rebellion has completely died out without a shot fired. Scores of rebels who were too slow or still too drunk to flee are arrested, but no leaders of the movement remain, and George issues blanket amnesty for any participants in the rebellion. Only two of the men arrested are convicted of crime and sentenced to death, but George pardons them for it the following year. But the Whiskey Rebellion isn't the only frontier conflict that hits its breaking point in 1794. For years, American Indian tribes in the Ohio area, such as the Shawnee and the Miami,

have been resisting pioneers settling on their land. To make matters worse, let's remember those British troops refusing to leave their forts. They're encouraging conflict. And this veritable war has resulted in some serious loss of life, like in 1791 when an Indian coalition led by Miami Chief Little Turtle and Shawnee Chief Blue Jacket killed 630 American soldiers. This battle was and is the greatest Indian victory over the U.S. Army in history. Come August 1794, George sends General Mad Anthony Wayne, who is an aggressive, experienced revolutionary general with a stellar record and an even better nickname, with a force of about 2,000 regulars and 1,500 short-term volunteers to pursue the Shawnee Miami Army through Ohio. They throw down on August 20th. This battle will be known

as the Battle of Fallen Timbers. The battle is quick and decisive. Matt Anthony leads around 900 well-trained men into the woods and brush where they know the Miami and Shawnee, along with some Canadian militia, await them. Matt Anthony says, and forgive the bad grammar, I'm quoting him, the Indians and Canadian militia and volunteers were drove from their coverts in so short a time that although every possible exertion was used by the officers to gain their proper positions, each could hardly get up in season to participate in the action. The enemy being drove in the course of one hour more than two miles through the thick woods. Close quote. The Indians fall back to the British

fort, Fort Miami, but the British refuse to let them in. They fear that, if they do, they might start a war between Britain and the United States. So abandoned by their allies, the Indians flee with their families, leaving behind their homes and fields. Mad Anthony's men then burn and destroy it all. The Battle of Fallen Timbers is the end of coordinated Indian resistance to white settlement in the Northwest Territory of the United States. Indians are forced to surrender large parts of modern-day Ohio in next year's Treaty of Grenville. Not that settlers will

respect this new treaty much. George holds no illusions about the fate of American Indians. Land speculators and pioneers will deplace them. He hopes this will happen peacefully through government treaties and reservations, not battles. He urges Indians to abandon their traditional ways and take up European-style farming. But he knows better. In 1796, George declares, in frustration, I believe scarcely anything short of a Chinese wall or a line of troops will restrain land jobbers and the accroachment of settlers upon the Indian territory. The Battle of Fallen Timbers does have one non-Indian

impact though. It convinces the British to abandon their forts in the Northwest Territory. In fact, it's time to put a band-aid on some of the woes with Britain through a new treaty. George sends John Jay to London to get the British to back off. Now, John is a great negotiator, but Britain knows it has the upper hand this time and strong arms him into a less than stellar deal. This Supreme Court justice only gets the British to vacate their eight forts in the Northwest and a favorable trade deal for U.S. ships in the British West and East Indies. But that's it. Meanwhile, Britain gets a most favored nation trade status with the U.S.

This pisses off Southerners who complain because it hurts the export of their latest cash crop, cotton. They're also upset that the anti-slavery John doesn't negotiate payment for slaves liberated, sorry, slip of the 21st century tongue, stolen by British soldiers. Finally, this treaty doesn't even address the American sailors forced onto British crews. It's not a great treaty. John knows it, but it's better than going to war with Britain. So he reluctantly signs it on November 19th, 1794, and brings it back to the U.S. for ratification. The Senate ratifies the deal in June 1795, but only after John and, by association, George takes serious scrutiny.

Thankfully, another treaty in the works at the same time helps George save face and regain some popularity. The Revolutionary War veteran and former South Carolinian governor, Thomas Pinckney, goes to Spain to work out that disputed territory west of Georgia in 1795. Luckily for the American envoy, French victories have left Spain smarting and unsure of its alliance with Britain against France. Thomas uses these weaknesses to get major concessions from the Spaniards. First, the treaty moves the border of Spanish Florida about 70 miles south to what will become the border between Alabama and Florida. Second, it guarantees U.S. and Spanish citizens full navigation rights on the

entire Mississippi River. And finally, the Spanish promise to stop inciting Indians to attack white settlers. These last two points alone are enough to keep the entire Western American population happy. The treaty is ratified on March 7, 1796, after only two weeks of debate. Obviously, this is a much easier pill to swallow than the Jay Treaty. As George's second term winds down, his cabinet members resign and move on to other pursuits. Flustered over the Citizen Jeunet crisis, Thomas resigns at the end of 1793. Alexander resigns in January 1795 and goes back to practicing law. Henry Knox steps down as Secretary of War and even John Jay steps down as Chief Justice.

George scrambles to find people even half as capable as these brilliant men. He can't. And George is facing both staunch opposition and support. Republicans call him a hypocrite and a tyrant. Federalists clamor for him to take a third term. But George has been determined for some time to step down. He digs out the speech he meant to give at the end of his first term. Alexander, who wordsmithed for him so many times before as his aide-de-camp, helps him edit it. This is George's famous farewell address. He never actually delivers this address. He simply publishes it in newspapers

on September 19th, 1796. In it, George officially announces his retirement. He acknowledges that stepping down as the head of a nation is almost unheard of, but hopes that doing so will protect the interests of all Americans as presidential power transfers peacefully to a new leader. And he's tired. A toothless, arthritic, aged George acknowledges his faults and ponders his death, to quote, beseech the Almighty to avert or mitigate the evils to which they may tend. I shall also carry with me the hope that my country will never cease to view them with indulgence, and that, after 45 years of my life dedicated to its service with an upright zeal, the faults of incompetent abilities will be consigned to oblivion, as myself must soon be to the mansions of rest. George cements the new nation's Republican character while setting a two-term limit precedent that will continue for 150 years.

He happily hands over the presidency to John Adams on March 4, 1797. On March 15th, 1797, the aged American hero arrives at Mount Vernon. It, like him, is worse for the wear and in desperate need of renovations. Even the support beam under his banquet hall looks dangerously close to giving out. George sees to the repairs, but he won't enjoy them for long. Death will claim him in only another two years. There's one aspect of George's legacy left to discuss before we send the father of America to his eternal rest. Slavery. It's most appropriate to address the topic at the end of his life, because unlike so many people who are stuck in their ways, George is constantly evolving.

And that trait enabled him to grow as a person from being a typical 18th century Virginian who wouldn't even think to question slavery, into someone who ultimately frees his slaves. George was born and raised in an America that didn't really question slavery, especially in the South. Accordingly, he didn't really think to question it either as a young plantation owner. He bought, sold, and disciplined slaves, which included whipping and selling the ill-behaved, like a typical gentry Virginian. But all that talking and fighting for liberty during the Revolution changed George. We've seen that in past episodes, as you may recall.

For instance, remember when he became commander of the Continental Army in episode 7? At that point, the provincial Virginian didn't care much for Northerners and thought allowing African Americans to enlist in the army was absurd. But he soon changed his tune on both accounts, welcoming numerous Northerners and even foreigners into his inner circle while enlisting black soldiers, often with the promise of freedom. I wonder, did his beloved yet bold anti-slavery aide-de-camp and fellow Southerner, John Lawrence, ever say things that made the logical and consistent George rethink things a bit? Because the then commander-in-chief was also starting to

question his own role as a slave owner. On August 15th, 1778, he mentioned this casually in a letter to his estate manager and distant cousin, Lund Washington. Quote, I every day long more and more to get clear of slavery. Close quote. Now Now George didn't run home and free his slaves, but by the late 1770s, the changing man made a very positive step. He resolved never again to sell slaves against their will. This practice would damage him financially, especially as he shifted from cultivating tobacco to other less labor-intensive crops like wheat, and thus didn't need as large of a labor force. But he refused to separate families ever again.

We see further evolution during his presidency. Remember when Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson went toe-to-toe over the American economy, with Alex championing northern banking and Tom pushing southern agrarianism? Well, Southerner George sided with Alex in part because he knew that Tom's agrarian vision would perpetuate slavery, and the president wanted to see that end. Nonetheless, giving up his own slaves was yet another corner to turn. Remember how the nation's capital moved down to Philly during George's first term in office? Well, after getting there, he sent some slaves from Philadelphia back to Mount Vernon in 1791 because a new Pennsylvania law set slaves free if they stayed in the state for six months. If you walk by the historical site of the president's house in Philly today,

you can read about this on a plaque. Though 100% true, I do wish Philly's public historians would have also mentioned on it how George later used the same law to liberate slaves. At the end of his presidency, the founding father purposely left slaves in Philly, which was a smooth way to free some without his neighbors back in Virginia knowing. I know it might seem crazy to us in the 21st century, but George was getting serious hate from his neighbors by this point because George supported Hamiltonian northern ideas for the American economy, not Thomas Jefferson's. To put a finer point on it, George told Edmund Randolph at some point after 1795 that if the North and South separated, he had, quote, made up his mind to remove and be of the Northern, close quote. Damn, I'd say George just drew a line, but I think Mason and Dixon beat him to it.

Okay, I'll bet by now you're wondering, if George is this anti-slavery at this point, why didn't he free his slaves immediately? The answer is philosophical. I'd say George saw slavery like a knife wound. You'd never rip the knife out of a stab victim and just say, great, you're healed, and send them on their way. Not only could you do more damage taking it out, but the person needs medical attention.

Similarly, George felt responsible for his slaves, most of whom had no trade or education. Would they get kidnapped and be sold further south? He also worried about separating families. Roughly half of the 300 plus slaves at Mount Vernon didn't belong to him. They belonged to Martha and the Custis family estate. Her slaves and George's slaves had intermarried. Would husbands, wives, children, and siblings be separated forever? So the old Virginian planter came up with a plan. He tried to set it in motion during his second presidential term by writing to a British agricultural reformer named Arthur Young on December 12, 1793.

George wanted to induce recent British immigrants to rent out his Mount Vernon farms, then have the immigrants hire his freed ex-slaves for wages. This way, George could keep families together, free his slaves, and do right by them in that he wasn't just sending them out into the world, the southern world, ill-prepared. In this era where human beings can be and are assets, this move would greatly diminish his net worth. And right on, George, you were ready to do this. But alas, the plan never came to fruition. Still lacking a solid plan and knowing the grave wasn't far off, he wrote a new will in July 1799. In it, George listed his slaves in family groups, an act that in and of itself was

unusually humanizing for a slave owner. As state law prescribed, he stated that the sick and elderly slaves were to be taken care of. The young were to be taught trades so they could succeed in life and be freed at 25. Billy Lee received freedom and a stipend for life immediately. This I give him as a testimony of my sense of his attachment to me and for his faithful service during the Revolutionary War, George explained in his will. Billy chose to live at Mount Vernon until his own death in 1810. As for the rest, to quote George's will again, upon the decease of my wife, it is my will and my desire that all the slaves which I hold in my own right shall receive their freedom. And why not until her death?

Because he's still worried about splitting up families. Though that said, Martha, who became fearful that they might kill her, freed George's slaves about a year after he died. George wasn't perfect. I think I've made no secret of that throughout this podcast. He was mortal. He had a temper and was a bit thin-skinned. But tell me this, how many of the rich today would, upon their death, implode

much of their estate and wealth, which could be passed on to loved ones, because they feel the industry that generated it, say tobacco, liquor, or gambling, is immoral. Probably about as many as would in the 18th century, which brings me to my final statement. The fully evolved elderly George was the only Virginian founding father to set all of his slaves free. December 12th, 1799. The cloudy morning gives way to snow, hail, and then a cold winter's rain. George is off inspecting his farms in this weather.

The now 67-year-old Virginian's personal secretary, Tobias Lear, tells us that when George came home at three in the afternoon, quote, I observed to him that I was afraid he had gotten wet. No, he said, his great coat had kept him dry, but his neck appeared wet and the snow was hanging on his hair. Close quote. Remember, it's 1799. People don't understand germ theory, so the old wives tale that you'll catch cold in the rain is still alive and well. December 13th, sometime in the evening,

Tobias tells us that George has a sore throat and hoarse voice. Nonetheless, the retired president reads aloud anything he found amusing in the newspaper. Ugh. Then he sees in the paper that James Madison is supporting James Monroe for Senate. Oh, George's blood boils. Those damn Southern Democratic Republicans. No matter, Tobias has served George for years and knows how to get him out of his politics-induced foul mood. But before bed, the loyal secretary encourages George to take some medicine.

No, you know I never take anything for the cold. Let it go as it came, George responds. December 14th, sometime between 2 and 3 a.m., George, overcome with fever and chills, wakes Martha. She wants to go find a servant, but George won't have it. She's just getting over a cold herself, and he wants her to stay comfortable. At dawn, they send for one of the slave overseers, Mr. Rawlings, who will bleed George while doctors are on the way. Yes, you heard that right. They think draining vital life blood is good for the ill in this era. No wonder Madison of the day often does more damage than good.

Rawlings arrives. He's shaking with fear at the thought of administering to his legendary employer. Don't be afraid, George manages to say, bearing his arm. As instructed then, Rawlings cuts into George's arm. As the blood flows, Martha fears it's too much. George thinks it isn't enough. More, he croaks out. Rawlings ends up taking roughly a pint. George can't even swallow at this point. Tobias says George chokes

every time he tries to swallow the butter-melasses-vinegar concoction intended to soothe his throat. George's friend of 40 years, Dr. Crake, arrives. He bleeds George even more. He also places a beetle called Spanish Fly on the ex-president's throat. The emerald green insect causes a blood blister to form and bleed him yet again. George is now given a tea vinegar mix to gargle. At noon, he's given an enema that does no good. Around three or four, two more doctors arrive, Dr. Brown and Dr. Dick. They both examine George, then powwow with Dr. Crake. Doctors Brown and Crake both agree George needs

one thing, more bleeding. The much younger Dr. Dick disagrees. He wonders if bleeding someone so old again is wise. He suggests George risks suffocating from his inflamed throat, so it would be wiser to perform a tracheotomy. The older two doctors don't cave, but let's be clear, it doesn't matter. While Dr. Dick is on a better trajectory, chances are that George is already as good as dead. If he had diphtheria or streptococcus,

as some have since conjectured, there's no way 18th century medicine could save him. So for the fourth freaking time today, the choking, gasping for breath, 67-year-old George bleeds. This time, the blood flows slowly and thick. In total, George bleeds 32 ounces. George then manages to choke down some medicine, Calomel. It's actually toxic poison. But again, at this point in history, doctors think it's a great laxative. At 4.30, George tells his secretary Tobias to get Martha. When she arrives, George asks her to bring him the two wills he has in the study.

She does. He then tells her which one is outdated and which one is valid. Martha burns the old one while putting the new will and its promise of freedom for every single one of George's slaves in the closet. Tobias holds George's hand as the once continental commander asks him to sort his military letters and papers and settle his books. Doctor. George utters in a raspy voice to his old friend, Dr. Crake. "'I die hard, but I am not afraid to go.' George thanks the doctors for their assistance. Crake is wracked with sorrow.

"'But one last try!' Although George entreats the three doctors to just let him die in peace at this point, they can't seem to stop themselves. They have to try. Painfully, they force George into a sitting position, then form more blisters on his legs. Let's hope the wheat bran mixture they apply next dulls the sharp pain all over his lower body. It's grown dark.

George tells Tobias to make sure his body is not entombed until he's been dead for three days. Like so many in this era, George fears being buried alive. Do you understand me? George utters, eyes locked on Tobias. Yes, sir, responds the faithful secretary. Tis well, George replies. Martha sits at the foot of the bed. Tobias again holds ailing George's hand. House servants Christopher, Caroline, Molly, and Charlotte stand by as they have the whole day. Just shy of midnight, George moves one hand to the other's wrist to feel his own pulse. Craig! Tobias calls. As Dr. Crake approaches, George's hand falls from his wrist. Tobias grabs

George's hand. It's completely limp. Dr. Crake closes George's eyes. Is he gone? Asks Martha, utterly incapacitated. Tobias only manages to gesture. Yes. Thus ends the life of the Colonel of Fort Necessity, the Continental Army Commander-in-Chief, the Continental Congress and Constitutional Convention Delegate, the first U.S. President and Father of his nation. Enjoy those mansions of rest with the

Almighty, George. Production and sound design, Josh Beatty of J.B. Audio Design. Musical score, composed and performed by Greg Jackson and Diana Averill. For a bibliography of all primary and secondary sources consulted in writing this episode, visit historythatdoesntsuck.com. Join me in two weeks, where I'd like to tell you a story. HTDS is supported by premium membership fans. You can join by clicking the link in the episode description. to tell you a story. Thank you. Noah Hoff, Owen Sedlak, Paul Goringer, Randy Guffrey, Reese Humphries-Wadsworth, Rick Brown, Sarah Trawick, Samuel Lagasa, Sharon Thiesen, Sean Baines, Steve Williams, The Creepy Girl, Tisha Black, and Zach Jackson.