Hits 21 - 1998 (6): All Saints, Robbie Williams, Mel B, B*Witched

Episode Date: April 3, 2026

Rob dancing: https://x.com/Hits21UK/status/2039752587100995843Hello, everyone! Welcome back to Hits 21, the show that's taking a look back at every single UK #1 hit..You can follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/Hits21UKYou can email us: [e-mail] 21 DOES NOT OWN THE RIGHTS TO ANY MUSIC USED IN THE EPISODES. USAGE OF ALL MUSIC USED IN THIS PODCAST FALLS UNDER SECTION 30(1) OF THE COPYRIGHT ACT 1988

Hi there everyone and welcome back to Hitz 21, the 90s where me, Rob, me, Andy and me, Ed, are looking back at every single UK number one of the 1990s. Email us at Hits21 podcast at gmail.com, Twitter us, it hits 21 UK. Thank you ever so much for joining us again and thank you for waiting a couple of weeks while we got our affairs in order. We are currently looking back at the year 1998 and this week. We'll be covering the period between the 6th of September and the 10th of October. So we're almost there.

We're almost at the end of the year. It is time to press on with this week's episode. Andy the UK album charts as autumn turns to winter. In 1998, how are things faring over there? You're going to have to wait because the Wikipedia page is crashed. So I'm just going to have to quickly. The bastards. What are we paying for?

Jesus. I actually have considered paying for Wikipedia and that was one of my more boring days this year but I decided not to do that. I already do. I've even got a Wikipedia t-shirt. Have you really? Yes, I have.

You can all, there's got a shot now where you can support them with the... I think I will do that because Wikipedia, as far as I'm concerned, is the greatest achievement of the internet age. Probably. So, yeah. Okay, I wouldn't have...

I wouldn't have played down so much, as I was playing to the choir so much with this. Yeah, I would quite like to I want it to stay as independent as possible because I think it is something pretty wonderful and I use it such a lot that I do try and, you know, every day. To try and support

them. It's a relatively quiet period actually. I've only got a few albums to talk to you about this week, two of which we've spoken about before. First of all, it's boys' own with their latest I'm going to call it efforts, but that implies that there was any. And their album, Where We Belong. And of

course where that is is outside the pop charts. That were number one for two weeks and went double platinum. Before it's a return to the top, the fourth return to the top for the cause with Torcon Corners. Which just a reminder was the highest selling album within 1998, nine times platinum, and was at number one for one more week. And then to close off this period, turning into autumn in the sort of back-to-school period, it's Manick Street Preachers with this is my truth, Tell me yours. So their truth apparently is that their music is overrated. My truth is, I've never tried salmon.

Anyone else got any truths they want to share? I'm sorry, I'm flabbergasted by your salmon-free life. I just, I've needed to tell someone, and now I have. That went number one for three weeks and went triple platinum. So in the news, the Union flag dress worn by Jerry Halliwell at the 1997 Brit Awards sells at an auction for £41,000. That's equivalent to 80,000 today. Google is founded in California. Sarah Ferguson's mum, Sarah Brantz, dies age 61 after being involved in a serious car crash in Argentina. In America, Bill Clinton's testimony to the grand jury overseeing the Monica Lewinsky case is released to the public.

Dana Sue Gray is found guilty of three murders from 1994 and is sentenced to light. in prison and in Kosovo thousands of people flee the fighting as the Serbian army ramps up its efforts to seize the region. In TV news, the very first episode of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire is broadcast on ITV with Chris Tarrant as the host. Meanwhile, the royal family debuts on the BBC and American audiences tune in to friends to find out what happens after Ross says the wrong name at the altar during his wedding to Emily. The films to hit the the top of the UK box office during this period were as follows, saving private Ryan, and there's something about Mary. So, Rachel, how are the US charts coming along?

Look, what happens in America stays in America. Yeah, well, thinking about the Monica Lewinsky thing, I always get the same memory triggered when I think about that whole case. And I just wonder what happened to this guy and his amazing invention. I can't remember. if it was on tomorrow's world or something similar. But I remember there was a chap during this court case where he was doing his declaration on television about his professed innocence. And there was a chap who said, right, well, this new technology,

it's lie detector technology that actually, you can do it, you don't need the subject there. You can just do it from a television broadcast and it can pick up all the signals. And so they did a live demonstration where they played Clinton doing his I did not have sexual relations

with that woman thing and played this along and then at the end of it it was like yeah no he's completely telling the truth he's completely telling the truth and they're all like oh well well there you are then it's like

my God what happened to that man they always do this even now like I remember there was some YouTube video which I randomly landed on right after the infamous Prince Andrew Emily Maitless interview where two body language experts analyzed whether he was telling the truth or not and decided he probably wasn't.

And it's like, you know what? I used my own technology to decide that he probably wasn't telling the truth, which was my eyes and my brain. My bullshit detector. And it's up here. Right. Well, starting with the 12th of September in America, we start with three weeks of miseducation for Lauren Hill in the album charts, which I presume included classes in

patients testing and advanced spontaneity. Then it's hot topic man beast Marilyn Manson with mechanical animals in which we are probably the animals and media mind control is the mechanism or something one week. Then Lauren Hill is back on top. It would have been a consecutive month for her, but she showed up a week late. Singles. Three more weeks of every. Sarah Smith, and I don't want to miss a thing, which was actually written by one Diane Warren,

who also wrote, and I didn't know this before today, shares, if I could turn back time, and Leanne Rhymes, how do I live? She wrote loads and loads of big homes. I thought I knew the name, but I did not know she wrote that song, but now it makes perfect sense. By the way, I'm moving on from puns now after that previous disaster and experimenting with facts. So finally, for singles, that's all we're getting today. We have two weeks at number one for Monica without brandy. You're probably expecting a drinking joke there, aren't you?

Well, Smarty Pants, how about you drink this one down? Monica, of this song fame, once guest starred in Brack presents the Brack show starring Brack for Comedy Central. An accolade she shares with wrestler and life coach Diamond Dallas Page, and Hannah-Barbera cartoon heavyweight grape ape. You learned something new every day, don't you? The first of four songs up this week is this one. Bring it on.

You bring it on. Bring it on. Bring it on. Bring it on. Bring it on. Bring it on. Never stop giving good love, because that's what I call you for.

Never stop, baby, give it up. Okay, this is Boutique-it-you-can-bring-it-on with the rough stuff and give me your love. It's when you're watching your stop, baby. And always having you back for me to lock him in your one. Okay, this is Booty Call by All Saints. Released as the fourth single from the group's debut studio album titled All Saints. Booty Call is All Saints' fourth single to be released in the UK and their third to reach number one.

It's not their last number one overall, but it is their last number one of the 1990. BootyCall went straight in at number one as a brand new entry. It stayed at number one for one week. In its first and only week atop the charts, it sold 116,000 copies, beaten competition from Everybody Get Up by five, crushed by Jennifer Page, and my favorite mistake by Cheryl Crow. When it was knocked off the top of the charts, Booty Call fell six places to number seven by the time it was done on the charts in a bit inside the top 100 for 15 weeks,

the song is currently officially certified silver in the UK. As of 2026, Ed, it's a booty call. And the booty call wants your thoughts on the song. That's scattered, rather like the song itself.

It didn't help that when this came out and I have a very clear recollection, of this being in the charts and I remember the songs around it I remember deeper underground and you were there and you were there and star sounds, the music sounds better with you was there

but I had no idea what a booty call was I was 12 and the fact that this song has no real decisive tone really doesn't help it's catchy, it's one hook is catchy but I still don't know what this is

to be honest It seems to be going for like Machiavellian and naughty and cheeky. But all of the sound design and stuff it goes a bit like hammer horror and it ends up sounding like Billy singing about a murder or something. Why is it so spooky? Why have they gone?

I know it's a late night call but it's not like, it's not the guy from scream. I mean, to me, I was genuinely spooked out at the time And this is a totally me, this is a me issue that may have tainted my impression of this song. But in 1998, actually sort of around this time, about the Easter holidays, 28 years ago, I got taken by my family to a place called Thackeray Medical Museum in Leeds. I have a friend who works there.

Lovely place. It's brilliant. It was also for a 12-year-old who didn't really know anything. about medical history, genuinely traumatic. I've not been there since 1998, but I could probably actually draw the entire layout with all of the exhibits in that place. Because at the time, it was like, they all looked like Victorian torture devices. And so I was just a bit frightened by what people seemed to have to put themselves through in the past to try and cure themselves. and one of the things that stuck in my head was the iron lung.

This is related to booty core by all sense, by the way, somehow. But I remember, now, I didn't know what it sounded like. I didn't see one in action, but had a full size one there and some pictures of the big wards, which had hundreds of them, because polio was a big, big issue in those days. And it saved so many lives. It was an inspired invention, but it looked fucking spooky. It was a big long metal tube with someone's head sticking out of the end of it. And I remember my mum saying, oh, what used to scare me as a kid was the sound they made.

Now, I didn't know what that sound was, as I say, but in my 12-year-old mind, the noises in the background of booty call by all saints sounded like an iron lung must sound. And so this song was a confusing. confusing experience for the younger me. And yeah, what's happening? It's like nothing here coheres. It's like you over there, say booty car like like a parrot from time to time, because, you know, as you say, sexy. You, you make some noises like someone with sleep apnea.

You, you blow some raspberries, just go, and you go, uh, uh, uh, uh, like someone falling. to sleep after being slapped for an hour. And yes, it's got one hook, which I always remember as being booty call, booty, booty call. But it isn't. I can't even remember the hook, which has like three words in it. Because it's bring it on. Bring it, bring it on. It's, this is, this is nonsense. But by, by their standards, this is a total misfire. I could almost see what they're going for and the kind of sound they are trying to emulate, but it is a tonal misfire. And it's, it's, it's just a, it's a fascinating, unique train wreck. But it is a train wreck. I don't hate it, but I am baffled by it.

Hmm, yeah, I don't know. I didn't enjoy this. There are two really naked attempts in this episode by British artists to try and do something that Americans might like. And on both, occasions those attempts are pretty much dead before they've started. With something like under the bridge, I think they succeeded with the plan to take something American and give it more of a, you know, London at night kind of vibe. But I think in this, I think they take the idea too far, I think of All Saints being a British group that's cool enough to sell anything that seems slightly urban or aloof. There's an emotional core that should be at the center of this that is just not

there. I don't know what atmosphere they're trying to strike. For a song that's got fair enough intentions, like, you know, good love doesn't always have to come from the heart sort of thing. It seems to frame those intentions as something like, I'm agreeing with you, Ed, like insidious. The beat doesn't suit what they're trying to sell. This is something I could forgive, though, if the arrangement was up to much,

but there's very little going on here, no meat on the bones. There are long stretches where I'm not even sure if the All Saints girls know which melody they're supposed to be singing, especially in the verses. and there are long stretches in what I think is meant to be the chorus where nothing actually happens.

They just stop singing the verses and then a backing vocal comes in for a bit and then the verses start again. This feels like a very dull album track on an overloaded and overly long CD that accidentally got loose. I will give it credit though and keep it out of the pie hole

because I think is this the first track we've covered that uses like the mobile phone variant of the voicemail feature? I don't think it deserves to be kept out of the piehole just for that because I'm sure it didn't invent that device. It didn't invent it, no, I'm just thinking about it in context of the podcast. We have another next week that's not too far away. This isn't the first song to have ever done it,

but it is a massive staple of Norty's pop. Yeah, whether that's on Missy Elliott's first album or not is the question. Because that was like Timberlin's big sort of breakthrough project, wasn't it? So, yeah, I didn't find this to be hateful either, but let's just forget this happened, shall we? It's one of those, but it's like, write it off, move on, start again. We'll just, we'll pick up with pure shores in a couple of years, girls. How about it?

Andy, Booty call! Thank you. Yeah, this one take long. First of all, when you two are saying, Booty call in that fashion, it reminds me that I'm going to make the deepest cut reference ever, which Ed will get, Rob Want, from a Doctor Who story from 1988. called the Happiness Patrol, where there's a villain made entirely of sweets called the Candy Man, who answers the phone as Candy Man.

Might as well. You know, it might as well have just been the video of him kind of staggering around looking like Bertie Bassett. Be sexyer than the actual song. The Happiness Patrol is genuinely better than this. Not that, I mean, it's sort of apples and oranges. I don't think it's ever been compared to a distinctly gay 1980-time BBC show ever before, but there's a first time for everything, and if we must compare the two, then this is worse than that. Because this is worse than most things. This is shit.

What's going on here? Just, you're all saints. You make good music, not bad music. You've forgotten. It's just, I mean, all the ones we've had by All Saints, we had two in the Nauties that were fantastic, and then we've had two in the 90s, which, you know, good. I didn't love them, but they're good. You know, really consistent high bar.

You always, you know, feel satisfied with it. All Saints number one's. This, I just, I agree with Rob that, like, it seems like this is escaped rather than being released. Like, you could really have fooled me that this was a demo, because it's the sparseness that really gets me about this. That there's a level of minimalism to that production that it's really tacky and rubbish and, like, just boring. But then you think, it's just going to sort of loop around again to being kind of brilliant in a way that some minimalist songs do. And then you think of actually no, this is still going. It's looked back around again to be an even worse than before.

Like, it's just, it's reached this kind of uncanny valley in audio form, I think, where it's just, it's disconcerting. I agree with both of you. It's got this odd sort of unknowable atonal quality to it, which is not at all what you want with a sexy song. You want to be seduced. You want to be pulled in. You don't want to be sort of like feel a little bit like you're talking to the T-1000,

which is a little bit what's going on here. It's really deeply rubbish. I completely agree about this being, sort of looking at what the American market is doing and doing the Mr. Bean meme of looking over at their exam notes. You know, it sort of feels a bit like that. And there's certainly a stronger example of that coming up this week. But I just thought, you know, quality control for All Saints

just really collapsed here because they have a really good singles discography. This is rubbish and not worthy of them. And it certainly is getting pie-hulled, I'll tell you that. So, sorry. It's amazing how wide-ranging this brief discussion has been. It just shows what a tonal disaster it is. It is.

Because we've had Doctor Who, we've had Bertie Bassett, and we've had polio. So, well done all saints. What a sexy, sultry little number that is. I just want to say for our legal team, that hits 21 does not suggest that packets of Bertie Bassett sweets carry polio. It's not been proven. It's not been proven. Yet.

Alright then, so yeah, let's see all that off and forget about it. Here's the second song this week, and it's this. Okay, this is Millenium by Robbie Williams Released as the lead single from his second studio album titled I've Been Expecting You Millennium is Robbie Williams' seventh single to be released in the UK and his first to reach number one and it's not the last time we'll be coming to Mr Williams during our 90s coverage. Millennium went straight in at number one as a brand new entry.

It stayed at number one for one week. In its first and only week atop the charts, it sold 140,000 copies, beating competition from Sex on the Beach by Teaspoon. When it was knocked off the top of the charts, Millennium dropped one place to number two. By the time it was done on the charts, it have been inside the top 104, 31 weeks. The song is currently officially certified platinum in the UK.

As of 2026, Andy, how are we feeling on Mr Williams' first solo number one? Yeah, when I was younger, I used to really like this, and I used to love the whole vibe with the golden backdrop and the tuxedo and that sample, which is really good. I used to really like this, and then about really close to 20,000. 25 years I think passed, like most of the intervenant period between this being out and the present day, I've never really listened to it. For no particular reason, it's just passed me by. And I was a little bit disappointed, if I'm honestly.

I still like it. But the qualities that I tend to find grating about Robbie Williams and about his music start to really come in and be noticeable here for me. Because a lot of his earlier singles, like, I love Angels, I love Let Me Entertain You, I love Strong, You know, a lot of his stuff from the late 90s, I really like, and I don't think he's become this braggado show, really annoying, kind of, just, you know, sort of let the crowd carry you kind of guy that he becomes later on. It's starting to appear here, though. It's a little bit of a problem for me here, that I feel like he's starting to ride

the crest of a wave and become a little bit sort of overconfident, and that sort of cocky swagger that he's famous for is starting to become quite noticeable here, mainly because there's not a huge amount going on in this song for him as a singer. Anybody could sing this, really. Like, I feel like he's just kind of jumping in on top of quite a lot of different elements in this. You've got that sample from You Only Live Twice. You've got a pretty catchy tune, and you've got a very, very nice bridge. That's my favourite part of the song.

That's my favourite part of the song, for sure. And a really lovely music video and all the James Bond's things that are in that video, you know, really, really clever, really fun. It doesn't need to be Robbie Williams. He's just coming in and riding the crest of that wave, really, and doing it with a huge amount of cockiness. And I don't love that, to be honest. I think it's starting to set Robbie on a course

that will become really, really annoying in about six to seven years' time. And in the 2010s, he basically becomes, like, Gabbo from The Simpsons, basically. So, you know, it leaves me feeling a little bit sour. But it's a perfectly nice song. I got a little bit bored, to be honest, because I think each verse to chorus to the next verse to chorus is not particularly different to each other.

It's pretty playing down the line. Like, it's got a lovely sound to her, and it's very catchy, very sing-along, but there's not a huge amount of innovation here. It's just like a solid, big, designated hit for Robbie to have. And I can't help but feel a little bit kind of always on the back foot about it because you only live twice, both the film and the song, but particularly the song I love so much.

My absolute favourite Bond theme, I think it's a beautiful song. And by the way, what an absolute travesty it is, that that song is not on Spotify. The proper original version of that song is not on Spotify. Not many songs as big as that aren't on there, by the way. But yeah, I really love you when you live twice, and to hear it slightly butchered by this and put in a place that's not particularly suitable for it,

I don't love that. But yeah, this is fine. It's a good, solid, straightforward here for Robbie to have But I do think that he's kind of lucky to have landed on his feet with this one. And I get the feeling it's all starting to go to his head just a little bit. Who would have known that arrogance and Robbie Williams might be associated with each other? Yeah. But this is, it's all right.

It's okay. Not as good as I remembered, yeah. Ah, hello, Robbie. Nice of you to finally join us. We've been expecting you. Unlike you, Andy, I have very fond memories of this as a child. think this was maybe the first song I ever properly inherited from my mum because she had Robbie's first three albums on CD and tape.

And so it was everywhere in my life, really, like, in the house, in the car. Those are basically the only two places I heard music as a kid, actually. But, like, you know, Robbie was in both of them quite frequently. And among the many Robbie singles I heard during this time, this was always one of my favorites. It's maybe not got the, you know, the soaring, enduring, enduring. balladry of angels or like the attention grabbing glam quality of let me entertain you. But it does have something that a lot of Robbie's best songs have, which I think I didn't really

pick out as a child or could articulate as a child, but I can now, which is I think, you know, this is something that has a lot of confidence up front that is very clearly masking a great sense of insecurity. I think that's Robbie summed up, to be honest, someone who is so addicted to fame and wants to be known. and he's someone who's so ostensibly confident in public, but I think he knows on the inside that he's a bit broken and maybe not quite stable on the inside, you know, and that fame and the responsibility that comes with it

feels like to him the only thing that stops him from blowing his brains out. I think, like, in the film, that definitely revealed itself in a better man. Because, like, up top, Millennium, you know, it releases and unleashes the big guns, Like, you know, it's got the John Barry sample from, yeah, you only live twice, all this talk about stars directing fate, naming a song, Millennium, as we stand on the brink of one. All this come and have a go if you think you're hard enough, you know, it's gloriously decadent as well. I think it sounds grand and declarative, like it's trying to be an anthem for the millennial youth of the late 90s.

And, like, we've been making money since the day we were born and all this stuff, you know, born into good times. but then each of these images he paints, all this stuff about stars and prayer and players and pawns and stuff, it's all kind of juxtaposed with this idea that time is running out and that we're a generation looking for quick solutions to long-term problems, live for liposuction, detox for your rent, you know, get up and see the sarcasm in my eyes. It's a song about, I think, someone having a good time,

but is maybe worried that the good time they're having is fleeting. And in the song, the protagonist does, doesn't want the night to end, but against the backdrop of this coming at the end of the 20th century, I think there's a more kind of larger existential worry going on as we move from one millennium into another. I will say, I think the exposed insecurity is something that Robbie's maybe not 100% aware of at this time, but Guy Chambers definitely is. Because Guy never says anything, I'm sure, because he knows what the two of them could do together if he just keeps this hidden from Robbie, you know, that a lot of his deepest fears and insecurities were actually making

it out into the public. And in this song, it feels a little bit like, you know, Robbie comes in, wanting to do something suave and cool and Bond inspired. And Guy Chambers is like, yeah, Roby, sure, yeah, absolutely. And then gradually teases levels of vulnerability out of Robbie over the course of the recording and the writing sessions. This is actually where I think Robbie lost it years later after him and Guy broke up. There was nobody there to bring out that little boy in Robbie, who was still upset about his dad leaving, thinking that he's not good enough, thinking that he's broken in some way. I think the two of them working together grounded a lot of Robbie's flights of fancy in an emotional reality that is severely lacking on stuff like Root Box, for example,

which is what happens when Robbie's given full creative control before he grows up. Whereas with this, I do think that there is a solid degree of, yeah, vulnerability in this, which I think that they gradually work out together. And it means that in this moment where Robbie's like, let's do bond for the next album, let's go big with strings and orchestras and make it glitzy and glamorous and Guy Chambers is there like, yeah, but what about the man behind the suit? That's what I want to know about. And I think Robbie was kind of happy to let that happen during the creative process. And a shout out, I think, to my favorite bit of the song, which is that Coda section, which brings in a new.

chorus, the then when we come, we always come to like that bit. You know, that's a great new bit to throw it as just as we think the fade-outs coming. So yeah, I think this is a really successful outing for Robbie personally and a deserved first number one as well. But Ed, how about you on Millennium? Well, I am very fond of Robbie as a whole. I've probably mentioned it on this show before. But I didn't really expect to be.

He was always kind of background noise, really, when I was coming. I mean, up. He was just always there, and we'd been in tape that. And I knew his persona. Everybody did. He was the cheeky boy pop star. You know, come on. Have a look at me. Aren't I amazing? And, you know, I didn't really take the bait at the time. But many moons later, I got a, I was at a village fate. You might remember this, Rob, in my mum's village. And I'd been running one of the stalls. And they'd been running one of the stalls. And they're, They were clearing out, you know, trying to sell off all the remaining stuff they could. And I was looking through, like, loose, you know, just sleeveless CDs that were on one stand. And the chap was obviously trying to clear up. And he said, look, take the whole pile for a quid. And I'll even throw in a bag. Because it was basically like, I don't have time for you to funnel your way through this, this 25 unmarked discs.

And it was a pretty good deal. Half of them were knackered beyond listening, but one of them was sing when you're winning by Robbie Williams. And listening to that, I was a little bit shocked by actually how really, really good the singles were. And it's like, you know, these were actually good songs. These were actually good songs. Now, this isn't off that album, but you used the phrase designated hit, Andy. that's kind of how I feel about this a bit because what I'll say first off

this has so much more character than the all-sex song which sounded like a sterile sound design misdemeanour that this is suave cocky wanker all over it's very much Robbie however you feel about him he's very easy to recognise and it was all in place at this point you know there's nothing formative here

this is very much him including that the most Robbie moment of them all, which is him singing in a falsetto, the come and have a go if you think you are hard enough. I actually love, I love the suave, sort of cocky douchebag side of Robbie.

That does appeal to me because there's something slightly provocative about it. I get the impression, especially these, it's not quite as provocative as he would like it to be. I think he does want to have his cake and eat it too when it comes to being a pop star and an agent provocateur, if you get what I mean. But there is something very appealing about someone

who straddles that kind of pop art dimension, but he's very, very bankable and knows he's very, very bankable, and he knows what his bread and butter is, really. And yeah, Robert, it is built on insecurity, and it is built on hubris because he is a very insecure man and that becomes part of the dance and part of the character.

By the time you get to things like heavy entertainment show, it's really clearly on display and he knows it. You know, I think he knows that people know that he isn't all, he doesn't think that much of himself. He doubts himself a lot and he's constantly trying to check

and second guess his public appearance. But yeah, Andy, echo in your sentiments. You Only Live Twice is my favourite Bond score. It is one of my favourite songs of all time. And yes, it does irk me slightly. Talk about First World Problems. That it is the only song on my favourite songs 24-hour playlist

that I can't actually get the original version of on Spotify. It's just so infuriating. It really is. It is. It is. It has happened twice. It's come back and then it's gone again. At one point, it was only available through the Mad Men soundtrack, and now that's gone.

The version that is on there, it's just so inferior. It's a bit more twee and of its time. It doesn't have the sense of scope and exotica that the actual genuine theme does, which is a wonderful piece of music, I think, in so many ways. And Nancy Sinatra, as much as it was a nightmare to record it, bloody kills it. You know, it's... Yeah. She just has such great...

on that. Admittedly, apparently, it was made up of an assemblage of of individual words pretty much because they didn't get a single, proper, fully usable take, but it was a masterwork in that regard. But yeah, anyway, back to Robbie, because, yeah, unfortunately,

again, this is another bizarre 1998 story involving illness. Earlier on the year, I'd actually been out of school for quite a long time because I had a slightly rare disease that they were concerned would spread to my kidney. So I was initially just poorly,

and then I was in hospital on observation, I briefly. And then I milked the shit out of me. I'll be frank. Oh, my poor mum. But I hated school, so, yeah, I'd stayed home and watched a lot of Bond films and played Extreme G on the N64. But, yeah, you only live twice.

I fell in love with that film. and its score during that period. And so this song came just in time for me to be defensive about it later in the year. Like, oh, no, that's not that song. That's in the wrong song. And it just keeps going. It's the same thing again. That's rubbish, that is.

Yeah, that was where my head was at the time. I did grow out of it like a lot of people do. But, yeah, I mean, I think it says a lot here that I've spoken a lot about Robbie's character what I like about it. and the origin of the sample, but not very much about the song. Because the song itself, it's not really much to it. I like his lyrics. I like his delivery.

It's slick. It's smooth. It works with the tone it's going for, unlike the previous song we looked at. But by the standard of some of his bigger hits, it's not very interesting, I don't think. It's certainly not as dramatic or as dynamic, certainly. and I think in many ways when he gets to his big maximalist period coming up shortly,

you get some of his best stuff. I know it divides people, but I'm not going to get to talk about it. I love rock DJ, and I have always loved rock DJ. I think it's a real bright banger, really, to be honest. But, yeah, Millennium, I like it.

I really like the album it's off, actually. I think that's possibly his best record, personally. song for song. It's got his most variety. He's not just purely aping Oasis anymore. He's aping a bunch of other people instead. But it's a really solid collection of songs. And his character comes through on it enough, regardless of what he's jumping on bandwagon-wise. But yeah, this is an advert for Robbie Williams more than it is a great song in many ways. This, it's fine. So, the third song up this week. is this.

Because I keep taking you back So I'm stupid like that Yeah, yeah, you know a fool But I can't say no And I never say no I can't say no to you Because you treat me whack If I don't want you back

Uh, I think I want you back Your love is made a deep It might sound like Want you I think I want you back Might sound why I want you Want you back Mom I'm tired of you

Running over me telling me what to do Now what I've done to you To make his sex a lot I thought I made you hot Now don't mean me act a fool I know I talk my junk But I know what I want What I truly want is you

And even though you're a mad to that I want you back Okay, this is I Want You Back by Melanie B and Missy Elliott Released from the soundtrack album To the film Why Do Fools Fall in Love

I Want You Back is the first single To be released by Melanie B in the UK and her first to reach number one. However, as of 2026, it is her last as a solo artist. I Want You Back went straight in at number one as a brand new entry. It stayed at number one for one week. In its first and only week atop the charts, it sold 86,000 copies,

beating competition from I Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith and Someone Loves You Honey by Nutricia McNeil. When it was knocked off the top of the charts I Want You Back fell three places to number four By the time it was done on the charts It had been inside the top 100 for 15 weeks The song is currently officially certified Silver in the UK

As of 2026 Oh the number of songs Staying at number one for a week And then only getting silver Oh Those numbers are going through the roof right now. Andy Melanie B and Missy Elliott

oh god no that pretty much sums up in my thoughts on this just the word no um yeah no this doesn't work

at all I mean the choice of Missy Elliott as a companion for this song makes it even more nakedly obvious what Melby's trying to do with this I get that you know you've kind of got to make a little bit of a stamp if you're launching a solo career, you want to be different from the Spice Girls, you know.

Or if you're Jerry, just do more of the same. But, you know, Melsie certainly made a success of being quite different from the Spice Girls. Nothing wrong with that. It's not the fact that it's different that's wrong. It's that it's just so ill-conceived and so just nakedly trying to cash in on late 90s R&B and particularly like Missy Elliott's own style, to be honest. It's just really trying to ride a way that she's not part. part of and it comes across as we've got Missy Elliott at home basically it comes across as really

tacky and really just orderline trash to be honest like it's really really really cheap and nasty and the lyrics I mean clunky is not the word for some of these lyrics like you think how did this get through production like how did no one thing oh hang on that's a bit clunky because there's things that like repeat themselves over several lines and it's just weird there's that whole bit about i can't say no it's like yeah yeah you know we're through but i can't say no and i never said no i can't say no to you because you treat me whack what the hell is that that's just like it's really like Rebecca blackworthy that the way it just goes on can't say no i don't say no i don't say no to this because you're whack and also the use of whack i remember the 90s people

didn't really say whack they didn't not really certainly not people from the UK did not say that. It's just, it's really like a desperate, pandering exercise to people who are not currently in her fan base to try and get new people on board. And that is a tried and tested thing, of course, that you try and take the people with you from the bands you are in, and then try and add on a whole bunch of new people by taking it a new style. Worked so well for Harry Styles, worked pretty well for Robbie Williams, worked very well for George Michael. it's not rocket science but if you get it wrong

it suddenly leaves you without any fans at all I find because suddenly the fans of the band you are in get turned off and you haven't picked up any new people because your new song is rubbish so you suddenly get cast out in the cold very very quickly and unfortunately I think that's the story

of Melby's career is that she just never caught on as a solo artist because she didn't release anything any good again it's not rocket science really but this is like I said really tacky I don't know what on earth Missy Elliott is doing lending a name to this.

They must have drove a dump truck of money up to a house. It's properly rubbishness. Even worse than All Saints. Yeah. And the second song of this week, of course, that is deeply, heavily indebted to American trends, and that is not a good thing for the British chats. Do you know what's even worse, Andy?

This was Missy Elliott's idea. Really? What? She phoned Mel B., and Mel B. went to the Spice Girls and said, alright girls, do you mind if I go to America and do this? And they went, yeah, sure. And she went, yes, I'm going over to

America to do this. That's worse because she's so, this song is not worthy of her. Come on. And she produced it too, Missy Elliot. Yeah. Oh my God. It's just lost a point for me, yeah. Yeah, I can't believe this is the first solo Spice Girls

number one. Oh, God. Oh, dear, yeah. How did we get number one? I didn't even think about it. It's just names in it. It's names. And I know the heiressmith are there, but like that took time to become like, you know, a massive karaoke staple and whatnot. But yeah, Mel B says that she got a call like, hey, I'm Missy Elliott.

I've got a track for you. Want to work on it? And then Mel said, yeah. And then she flew over to America. And she recorded it in a day, apparently. Fuck me, we can tell. And that's how this happened. The second song.

this week done by a British artist who think they can crack America with this new R&B sound that's emerging across the pond. God, think of the wasted air miles and hours spent on that plane. Oh, God, I really, this has left me questioning Missy Elliott's judgment like never before. Her instincts on this, oh God, fair enough, you know, if you've heard Mel B on wannabe and you think, hey, she can rap. Not here, not like this. not convincing, Mel saying, I'm tight with my flows while struggling to stay on beat. In the introduction is a big personal highlight for me. And a highlight towards the end is that sort of you are British, like an epitaph for the song

as to why it didn't work. The chorus is nothing, the fidgety midi violin. Ha! The fidu-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-----. Yeah, not many redeeming qualities in this. all. I think this is aged terribly as well. This is very much like a trying to capture a snapshot of a snapshot and it's like how how is that going to make any sense outside of like 1990.98? I just oh dear. Oh no. The more I've talked about this the more I'm thinking

I need to downgrade my score. I say yeah I really don't think this works just I still I've got many flows from overseas me old mucker yeah but the I'm tight with my flows while the beat runs away from her is fucking brilliant

I wish she's giving her a bit more character by leaning further into her actual accent like I've got many flaws you know just lean into it or at least like maybe Missy could rap and she could do the singing but no it's oh my god I guess they did it in a day

because, like, they have no melodies. It's just, we've got to freestyle it. We've just got to get it done. And then you can get back on that plane in three hours and you make a number one single. Oh, my God, it's so bad. Ed, take over. Now, I'm actually going to go a little bit lighter on it.

It is rubbish. I will say that. But I think, for me, this is quite cool and refreshing for about 30 seconds. Missy just sounds cool she comes in and I'm like oh great

so this actually she's going to have some right even just a little guest verse at the end right she's going to come back in right it's not just going to be

Mel B sounding like a deer in the headlights is it right for the whole fucking song I also I'll be honest the cheap clicky sounding almost production

which is that deliberate you know let me say well they were partners basically in terms of production, but Timberland adjacent kind of deliberate artifice I actually really like, at least initially. The problem is this all feels like false advertising, because the whole thing is a contrivance. I can't really add any more to what you two have said. I want to hear more of Miss Elyette. She doesn't come back. And the hook is fucking lame.

it's rubbish. And maybe Missy could have sold it, but again, Mel B's just, she's not got the necessary slouch and confidence with this kind of music to do that. So it just becomes really boring, to be honest. And it's a real shame, because hearing Missy appear

after things like that fucking All Saints track, it's like, oh, oh, a whole call, here we come, it's the real stuff. and yeah, it isn't. It's pretty nothingy. It doesn't offend me, but it is boring. It's just nothing.

Yeah, that was the thing that upset me the most actually, listening to it. When this started, I was like, I have no recollection of this, but Missy Elliott on a track with Mel B. In the late 90s, now that sounds like a recipe for something. And then you listen to it, and it's like, oh, right, we're 90 minutes in,

and nothing has happened. 90 minutes in. I hope not. Jesus, whoa. Oh, sorry, is that what I said? Could I say 90 minutes? Hey, it might as well be. It's not even a long song. I mean, that's one of the things you can say

about even the crap songs this week. They're not very long, and thank fuck. All right, so the fourth and final song this week is this. That's a roller coaster. Okay, this is Roller Coaster by Bewitched. Released as the second single from the group's debut studio album title

Bewitched. Roller Coaster is Bewitched second single to be released in the UK and their second to reach number one and it's not the last time we'll be coming to bewitched during our 90s coverage. Rollercoaster went straight in at number one as a brand new entry and it stayed at number one for two weeks. Yeah. In its first week atop the charts it sold 157,000 copies beating competition from Perfect 10 by the Beautiful South and do-op that thing by Lauren Hill. And in week two, it sold. 112,000 copies beating competition from Top of the World by Brandy. You Don't Care About Us by Placebo, Cruel Summer by Ace of Base, and Come Back Darling by UB40.

When it was knocked off the top of the charts, roller coaster dropped one place to number two. By the time it was done on the charts, it had been inside the top 104, 16 weeks. The song is currently officially certified gold. in the UK as of 2026, Ed, you can begin the end with roller coaster. This is very much, you know, second billing to Selvi in popular memory, I think. I don't know, maybe you two would disagree. I think third or fourth bill, and I think second bill is probably blaming on the weatherman. And this is third probably.

Third, probably. I don't remember that one either, to be honest. So fair do's, okay. This I wasn't totally, totally off base. But it's very finely crafted. It's performed with great charm. Again, it does feel more directly derivative, like this bit's been taken from here,

because it works. This bit's been taken from here. It opens pretty much exactly like tub thumping. Have you noticed this? Yes, absolutely. The core sequence of, And the basic mixing is identical. So you could just go,

Oh, get knocked down. But then, so did Sailor V, just in a different key. If you were to put that in the same key as Tub Thumpin, it's exactly the same. Then the bridge is just nicked from Sergeant Pepper. You're such a lovely audience. We'd like to take you home with us. We'd like to take you home.

And then the chorus is basically just T-Rex with sort of frosting and cherries and things on it. Yet the feel of these songs, it doesn't sound like any of those. so it's not like total plagiarism. They kind of fit together. The thing that really gets me, though, is that it just doesn't have the chorus power of Sela V.

And it sounds sufficiently similar in style that it feels like there's something missing from the chorus, feels a little bit hollow. You know, imagine you can easily transpose the chorus of Sala V into this, and it sounds so much more lively and like a roller coaster, actually. I mean, what sort of rollercoaster? is this exactly because it kind of

it builds up it's like it goes up the lift hill and then it's kind of like oh I guess it's one of those like the mini caterpillar rides you get where it's like you must be below this height the Wallace and Gromit ride at Alton Towers that's quite a fun one is it is it good though is it a good ride or is it

it's good as an experience because it's Wallace and Gromber as a roller coaster I'd say the thrill factor is you know sub-zero really so if it wasn't Wallace and Grommet it would just be like, you might as well just walk, walk around outdoors for a bit. Yeah, yeah. It's pretty much, it's a Gromit world after all at that ride, to be honest. It's a Sean world after all.

But, yeah, as I say, I like it. It's well constructed, but it just, it doesn't, it just doesn't pick up the necessary pace, but I think it's perfectly enjoyable. roller coaster come on get on it and give us your thoughts I will indeed sounds thrilling this is interesting because so I didn't remember this from the time and I only became familiar with it again when I saw Bewitched play at Manchester Pride last year as I've mentioned for Sylvie and they did this and they did the whole dance routine with it it's just very very nice thing and then recall it so easily all these years on and so many people in the crowd

singing along and I was like this is not bad actually and you know compared with what we've had this week I think Millennium might be better for me but I'll tell you this this is the one that's in my head out of the floor this week like this is the one that's kind of you know stuck there Millennium's you know it's Millennium the other two garbage so maybe it's just because

it's not the best quality week but this is maybe in some respect to my favourite of the week to be honest I think it's very charming in its tweeness and how straight down the line, you know, just like fun and friendly and sugary sweet this is, such a feature of the very late 90s, of course, particularly 1999. You know, it's that kind of sweetness, that sort of eternal summer feeling that I think has been mentioned before. And also the thing that really comes up with this song, I think even more so than Saylor V, is the other big feature of late 90s. pop music, which is music that's written specifically for children, that's aimed directly and obviously at kids, where adults just aren't really meant to access this at all. I think there's actually even more obvious with that than Saylor V was, because it's just, the whole

roller coaster thing, it's just, it seems like it's appealing to kind of base childhood excitement. I can't help but compare it to wheels on the bus. That's the comparison that keeps coming through my head. It's like, let's go on the bus. Let's go on the roller coaster. I grew up in my family, all the kids in the family, always I played this cassette that had like nursery rhymes on it. It started with wheels on the bus and then it went into a different one that went, go roll it on your roller skates. And it just feels like it fits into that category where it's like, let's go on the roller coaster, just really juvenile. And there's nothing wrong with that. But it's like, very obviously, like, for actual kids and not for anyone else.

And so it's a bit weird to listen to it as an adult, because it just feels really, like, slightly cringy and certainly, like I say, very juvenile. But it's very nice, very sweet. I can't really pick it too many problems with this. Like, it is what it is, and it does a good job of being what it is. Be which know their market, and they target it hard and good on them. I really don't like how presumably some label person somewhere was the thought, The bewitched brand synergy isn't particularly strong in this one.

Can we throw in a fiddle for no reason? And when that just turns up about two days of the way through, it's such an unwelcome guest at this party. Like the rest of the sound of this song, so there's no room for that Irish fiddle at all. And when that comes in, I just thought, oh, that's really, like, yeah, that's not a good decision at all. It's, you know, it's very corporate that's there.

And it is corporate, you know, there's not much soul in this. but as a little fun thing that kids can dance to at their birthday party and do for their first ever song on karaoke which I think I might have just got that in my head because didn't you do this on karaoke rob throwing you slightly into the bus?

Literally the afternoon that we have recorded this episode I have posted a video of myself singing it into a karaoke machine and dancing around my front room to me. That's why it's in my head of course but yeah it's designed exactly for that it does that job well but it is nothing more than that

It's just a glass of full fat Coke. Yeah, I'll put a link in the description to that video. If anyone wants to see me dancing to roller coaster around my back room in the house that I grew up in, aged four, Christmas 98, New Year 99. This was a big deal to me back then. You know, bewitched for a big deal to me back then. I've misremembered the footage that I found ever so slightly.

I do remember me and my cousins doing the roller coaster video pose where they, you know, they line up like they're on a roller coaster or like a bobsled thing. But I don't think that was caught on camera. What was caught on camera was me doing roller coaster and then my cousin doing girlfriend by Billy Piper, which obviously we've got next week. And then my auntie getting up and doing like a virgin before mooning the camera.

She does keep her underwear on at least, but I won't put that footage online. If I may, if I may just break in and say, you need to watch this footage of Rob. dancing because you probably have an idea of a cute kid doing an impression of the video and did signal on that. What Rob is doing is remarkably abstract. And I mean that in the best possible way.

It is one of those bits of footage that it's like it was, it should have been used by fat boy slim or the go team for a music video. It is firmly unique and speaks of a mind. likely out of sync with the world in a precious way. Yep, that about sums it up, actually. Definitely out of sync with the rest of the world, even at four years old. With this, I think this is cute. I think it's just as charming as Stella V, but maybe without being as striking,

just because we're already familiar with the dynamic of the group and the sound that they're going to be bringing us. I also think as well that my opinion of Celad, about it, maybe trying to appeal to children, was it influenced by me knowing what comes next? If I'd never heard anything after SELOV, I may have had slightly different thoughts on this, because this is very much for children. This is them, like, you know, just in case you thought Sala V might be for children, here's where we remove all doubt sort of thing.

This is smiley and bubblegummy and unashamedly so. It has a very easy going, that two-cord sequence running in the back without much fuss on that kind of soft organ thing, bewitched all sound and come across like TV presenters for kids, which I think is the vibe that they're going for. If there was any debate amongst us about Selivie and whether that was aimed at kids or not, I'm not sure that debate has much life here. Like, you know how I said Sel Avie struck me as more cheeky than naughty? This is like a further step back from cheeky. This is like playful, which means it maybe doesn't imprint on you instantly like Sela V, but still sticks to the kind of brand of music you're happy with them to make

and they even chuck in another solo like they do. I should add, they were already more popular in the UK than they were in Ireland by this point, even just on their second single, which maybe taps into something we said last week, that I'm not sure Irish folks were 100% happy with them by this point. I think they were there, like, initially, like, oh, and then maybe just among enough of the popular. to keep them off number one again. There's a few people going, yeah, but we are kind of being stereotyped a little bit.

And in the UK, their chart record, clearly we can't get enough of them. We love all these Irish stereotypes, apparently. Their chart record in the UK, they have eight singles that chart in the UK, and they go one, one, one, one, 4, 4, 13, 16. Over their eight singles.

And in Ireland... Bloody hell. their chart record goes 1, 2, 4, 8, 5, 6, 29, 26. They're very much on top form in the UK at the moment, but as certain war generals find out, if you lose support at home, then your conquest elsewhere gets harder to maintain, and we are less than a year from them basically vanishing off the face of the earth,

as a chart concern, which is really strange to think that, like, Bewitched don't really make it into the new millennium. No, not at all. They were very much a flash in the pan, which is strange to think a group with four number ones, but this is just the era of the chart that we're in. We're in fan base number one era,

where if Bewitched have a big enough fan base for a year, the first four singles they release can all go to number one, and then as soon as that drops, the number one's dropped. Do you know what's bonker, though? I just, I don't remember any of the songs, except for Sela V. So for me, there were always a one-hit wonder. And looking at the charts, I'm like, my God, they were huge.

Yeah, it's just true for me. They're one of the biggest bands in the country, evidently. And I don't know, just seems to have been scooped out of my memory. It was just Taylor V and Blaming on the Weatherman for me. And blaming on the weatherman, I would have needed a little bit of reminder of how that went. So they were close to a one-hit wonder for me. Before we go, just going to check Andy. Oudicall!

Millennium I want you back and roller coaster how we're feeling on all these four well Candyman is going into the pie hole for sure

Millennium is staying exactly where it is and I can't think of anything funny enough to say about I want you back except to say I don't want it back

as Amon might say and I never want to hear it again so that's going into the pie hole with a vociferous kick as it goes. And rollercoaster, well, it's not on a roller coaster because it's staying still

at the station. It's staying exactly where it is. Canceled due to inclement weather. And Ed, All Saints, Robbie Williams, Melby and Missy Elliott, and Bewitched.

Well, nothing vaulted, nothing shamed, as they don't say. But it's less a roller coaster this week than the Swanboat ride. Booty Call, keeping to this contrived flat ride theme,

that I've got going on here would be the world's spookiest tunnel of love. You want to get hot and heavy, but there's skeletons flying everywhere and sort of spooky pumpkin noises. Citation needed.

At least the ride's fairly painless, though. It's very smooth. It's through the water, so it's fine. Millennium is Toyland Tours. It was pretty cool. It was pretty cool because it had Sonic the Hedgehog in it. which was enough to distract you from the fact that you are basically being nudged around a backroom on the track repurpurposed from a previous ride. I want you back is the monorail.

The novelty wears fast and it technically doesn't get you anywhere, which leaves roller coaster. And I've already done a roller coaster joke, you know, remember that whole hilarious bit about the caterpillar ride here. Good times. So I will leave you with this. fact. The etymology of the term roller coaster is contested with some scholars suggesting it's a hangover from an earlier form of the ride in which the vehicles were propelled by rollers on the

tracks themselves. So they coasted around on the rollers. Now, in an interesting bit of unintended, I presume, cultural self-erasia, the Russian name for roller coaster is American Ski I'm probably pronouncing that incorrectly But that translates to American hills Which is interesting As the earliest traceable ancestor Of the modern roller coaster

originated in 17th century St Petersburg And was known elsewhere As a Russian mountain Ah, thank you for that I funnily enough, it's nowhere near as good as Edds I funnily enough was going to raise a question about etymology. Not so much

an actual point. We're going to raise a question. About booty call. Do you think we only have the phrase butt dial for phoning someone accidentally? Because the phrase booty call was already taken. Jamie the question. I'd never considered that.

That's a good question. But I don't know. I don't know. Like, I don't know if that's true. Maybe one for Susie Dent. I'll ask her about that. I'll tell you what it is one for. online encyclopedia we championed at the beginning of the episode Wikipedia will have the fucking answer I'm sure

God bless you Wikipedia pocket dialing they have a very long article just about pocket dialing with a lovely illustration of a phone in someone's pocket so you know both from the text and from the picture which article you're actually well I know what I'm doing this evening you're welcome everyone

thank you and thank you Wikipedia yeah. Thanks for everything, Wikipedia. As for me, booty call. The last chance just to do it. That's just, just staying out of the pie hole, but only just. Millennium is going into the vault. I'm really happy with that, personally. I want you back is slipping into the pie hole ever so slightly.

Those 30 seconds at the front keep it from being awful. All the way at the bottom, but fucking hell, yeah. It's meager. And roller coaster is, well, it's not going up or down. It's a very boring roller coaster, actually. It's more like a travelator. It's not really going anywhere. So when we come back, it'll be for our penultimate episode, I think, of 1998.

Then it'd be Christmas, and then it'd be the last year of the 90s. Oh, geez. To the Arndale Food Court on the escalator. Bye.