Hits 21 - 2003 (7): Westlife, Will Young, Ozzy & Kelly Osbourne

Episode Date: May 28, 2023

Hello again, everyone, and welcome back to Hits 21, the show that's taking a look back at every UK #1 hit single of the 21st century - from January 2000, right through to the present day. Twitter: @Hits21UK Email: [e-mail]

Hi there everyone, welcome back to Hits 21 where me, Rob, me, Andy and me, Lizzie all look back at every single UK number one of the 21st century from January 2000 right through to the present day. If you want to get in touch with us, you can. You can find us over on Twitter. We are at Hits21UK. That is at Hits21UK. And you can email us too. Send it on over to Hits21Podcast at gmail.com. Thank you so much for joining us again. We're currently looking back at the year 2003. And this time we'll be covering the period between the 22nd of november and the 20th of december 2003 so that means that our next episode will be discussing the christmas number one can you believe that we have already made it to the end of 2003 in such short time

i feel like you know even with five songs per episode in the year 2000 it still took us like nine episodes 10 episodes to get to the end so yeah but i think what we've probably learned over our episodes from 2003 is that the the quality of number ones has improved i think over the last two or three years and we're now at a point where they're sort of staying around longer and they're having a lengthier cultural impact, I think. Speaking of decent number ones that stick around for a little bit, this one didn't, but it was the poll winner for last week and it was Slow by Kylie Minogue. That was the poll winner for last week.

I tell you, that Twitter, the Twitter poll was tight. Really, really tight. I think that's also the highest number of votes we've ever had on a Twitter poll as well. But as tight as it was on the Twitter poll for Slow, Be Faithful and Crash the Wedding, it was not tight at all on the Spotify poll Crash the Wedding got zero votes

on the Spotify poll and so Slow waltzed away with it, so well done to Kylie, that's not the first time she's won our Song of the Week and I think it's only fitting really that I think

she got Song of the Week when she was on with Can't Get You Out of My Head as well She got Song of the Week and I think it's only fitting really that I think she got Song of the Week when she was on with Can't Get You Out of My Head as well She got Song of the Year as well and for Song of the Year and so I think it's appropriate that her final number one is Song of the Week so thank you to everyone for voting and on to this week's episode and as always

we are going to give you some news headlines from around the time that the songs we're covering in this episode were number one in the UK. In Iraq, Saddam Hussein is captured after being found 10 miles south of his hometown of Tikrit. Making the announcement to the United States public was Administrator Paul Bremner, who uttered the phrase, ladies and gentlemen, we got him. It was claimed that the United States military was tipped off to Hussein's whereabouts by a member of his own extended family. The M6 toll officially opens, giving the UK its first ever toll motorway. It was designed to ease congestion on the M6 route through the West Midlands. Meanwhile, the

Court of Appeal overturns two murder convictions against a 40-year-old woman who had been wrongly convicted of killing her two children. Meanwhile, an outbreak of mad cow disease is reported in Washington State in the US. This outbreak led to Brazil, Australia and Taiwan banning imports of American meat for several months. At the UK box office, after Love Actually is top of the box office for four weeks. The Lord of the Rings Return of the King begins a five

week run at number one that will extend into the first few weeks of 2004. The second and final series of Pop Idol is won by 23-year-old Michelle McManus. During the series, Judge Pete Waterman

is hit with hundreds of unwanted phone calls after Simon Cowell gives out his contact details during an episode. When asked why he did it, Simon replied that it was done in retaliation after Pete gave out his address during a previous episode to people behaving like adults there.

Yeah, just normal men doing normal things. Yeah. And Westlife's cover of Barry Manilow's version of Mandy is named as ITV's record of the year, before Johnny Wilkinson is named BBC Sports Personality of the Year. He didn't cover Mandy,

but I don't know. He might have done a better job with it. Probably. Not to give it away too much there but yeah never mind Andy album charts in the UK in November December 2003 how are they looking? well we're very much on the same topic

because it's Westlife coming in at number one for one week at the end of November with their latest album Turn Around and the main thing I have to say about it is that it's some of the cheapest, most flimsy album artwork I've ever seen. If you've not seen it, please do look it up everybody listening, it's Turn Around by Westlife and it's just a white background, some text that's been done in Microsoft Word and the

five of them arranged in this weird shape that's like a sort of sentient eyebrow um and it's just awful awful artwork um yeah very little to say about Westlife which is um maybe a problem going forward but anyway that's toppled at the top for one week by Will Young with Friday's Child his second album, second album already for Will Young, they do chain them out don't they that's one week at number one and would eventually go five times platinum big success for Will there before we see the year out with another

three weeks at the top going through the end of December right through to the start of January with Dido, with Life for Rent the highest selling album of the year, taking another three weeks at number one. Already had five weeks at number one and then takes the whole Christmas period as well.

Likely because of Love Actually, I think we've said, haven't we? But yeah, big Christmas for Dido. Okay, thank you very much. Lizzie, how are things in America? This is a surprisingly busy period. so Beyonce and Sean Paul's number one run was finally broken in early December by Ludacris who got to number one for one week with Stand Up featuring Shauna. It was certified platinum in the US but back here in the UK

it only got as high as number 14 while Crash the Wedding was at number one. With six new entries that week that placed higher than it. So after that, we get our final US number one single of 2003, meaning that the US Christmas number one for 2003 is Hey Ya by Outkast. Ah, that's nice.

So that stayed at number one for nine weeks and was certified platinum in the US. And it also entered the UK charts at number six while Crash the Wedding was at number one. Despite initially slipping down in the charts, it returned to the top ten in early 2004, but only got as high as number three. Stupid British public.

In terms of albums, Jay-Z scored his sixth US number one album with The Black Album, which got to number one for two non-consecutive weeks in late 2003. But, despite being certified triple platinum in the US,

it only got as high as number 34 in the UK. Wow. Yeah. So, between those two weeks at number one for Jay-Z was one week at number one for Britney Spears' fourth album In The Zone which again was certified triple platinum in the US and Britney also became the second female artist in Billboard history to have four consecutive number one albums behind Janet Jackson who had the most at the time with five however this is more unbelievable it only got to number 14 in the UK on its release

and it peaked at number 13 in July wow that is shocking because it had some well we'll get to it next year but it had some hell of a singles on there wow yeah she has a big year that's a that's a shock to me i thought that would be a nailed on number one but anyway um i'm also shocked that she's on her fourth album she's only been going since 99 and i i would struggle to name all four of those albums wow that's she is prolific at this time yeah yeah definitely uh just got one more to mention this week uh so alicia keys got to number one for one week with the diary of alicia keys which returned to number one for one more week in january 2004 despite being certified five times platinum in the us it entered the charts at number 13 in december 2003 we're really sick of the Americans at this point. And it would get no higher in the subsequent weeks.

Also, it was not the final number one album of 2003, so I will save that for next week. Cool, thank you very much. Wonderful, right, okay. On to the first song that we're going to be covering this week, and it is this. I remember all my life that we're going to be covering this week and it is this The night goes into morning, just another day. Happy people pass my way.

Looking in their eyes, I see a memory. I never realized how happy you made me. Oh, Mary, you came and you gave without taking but i sent you away oh man will you kiss me and stop me from shaking and i need you today oh mandy Mandy. Okay, this is Mandy by Westlife. Released as the second single from the group's fourth studio album, titled Turn Around, Mandy is Westlife's 16th single overall to be released in the UK and their 12th single to reach number one. It is not the last time we'll be discussing Westlife on this podcast either. Mandy is a cover

of Barry Manilow's hit which reached number 11 in 1975 which itself was a reinterpretation of Scott English's hit song Brandy that reached number 12 in 1971. Mandy went straight in at number one for Westlife as a brand new entry knocking Busted off the top of the charts. It stayed at number one for one week. In its first and only week atop the charts it sold 70,000 copies beating competition from Jump by Girls Aloud which got to number two, Maybe That's What It Takes by Alex Parks, which got to number 3, 50-50 by Lamar, which got to number 5, and Miracles by Pet Shop Boys, which got to number 10. When it was knocked off the top of the charts, Mandy fell two places to number 3. By the time it was done on the charts, it had been inside the top 100 for 12 weeks,

the song was eventually certified silver in the uk in july 2014. andy um feel free to open the show with mandy oh i can't wait yeah i mean i have very little to say about this for a few reasons firstly it's because we've we've kind of done Westlife to death at this point. Like, I really am so done with them that, you know, there's very little new to add to the conversation about them because all of their songs are so similar from each other. They all have the same, not even the same basic formula, the same formula through and through, you know, where it's sort of mid-tempo ballad with a string back in sounds a bit like what would later be known as an x-factor winner's single has the key change really like crushingly

thrown in there at the end you can picture firework rain and them getting off their stools all of their songs with the exception of some sort of the exception of world of our own have been exactly like that and uptown girl maybe a little bit as well but just the other reason i have so little to say about this is that it's just if you could distill down an exact microcosm of the word boring it would be westlife doing a cover of mandy by barry manilow like i am i am already not a fan of the original. Barry Manilow, nothing against the guy, but really, it's just very bland music.

And then you give it to Westlife, and they're not known for putting character into songs. They're not known for bringing songs to life, really. And they do nothing with it. They do this cheesy key change, as they always do, but really, it sounds like it was recorded in about five minutes and then handed over to the producers to throw all sorts of crap out here like i said earlier the album looked like it was made in about five minutes as well they're phoning it in because unfortunately this stuff sells it's really popular and the one fact

that i had to say about this the news section has beaten me to it, which is that it got record of the year which is just like, what a condemnation of the British public it is that that got record of the year let alone the fact that it got to number one I'm mystified, I'm absolutely mystified why people were still buying this stuff

this is like the laziest Westlife song we've had so far it's not the very worst song that we've covered on the show, but I think it is a really, really strong contender for the most boring song that we've ever covered on the show. And that's all I have to say. Please be gone, Westlife. I don't want to hear you anymore.

Go. Just to add on, by the way, to your little factoid about the record of the year 2003 the fact that mandy won um it beat be faithful bring me to life crazy in love yeah if you're not the one make love sweet dreams my lax where is the love white flag by dido and year 3000 by what i watched it and they all i think they all performed live and it was like a hell of a show. I remember it quite well. And then the fact that Mandy won

was seen as a huge, huge upset and I seem to remember it kind of discrediting record of the year forever. That's when it started to disappear from public consciousness as a TV show because if Mandy was going to win in a year that was not exactly a quiet year then you can't trust the public, can you?

Lizzie, Mandy, Westlife. Yeah, well, as you well know, I am the owner of our story, the Westlife autobiography published by HarperCollins in 2008. And yeah, I do have a bit of information about this. Like, I agree with you, Andy. This is not an interesting song, not in the slightest. But it is interesting in that it marks the end of the original five-piece Westlife.

So the story goes that Westlife themselves, Kian especially, were pushing for Hey Whatever to be the lead single from the Turnaround album but after its release in September it only got as high as number four and was the first Westlife single to sell fewer than 100,000 copies in the UK. So then comes a phone call one morning from a mortified Louis Walsh who tells him that Simon Cowell has demanded a meeting with the group later that day. Quote from the book, Simon's office walls are covered in discs and awards, explains Nicky,

and he sits behind a huge desk smoking like a steam train. Behind him is a massive mirror engraved with the words, Yes, Simon, you do look terrific. Jesus Christ. Not anymore, you don't, but anyway. In that meeting, Cal plays the Mandy by Barry Manilow and tells the group that he wants it to be their next single. It was, and it was a number one. And as we've mentioned, it was record of the year for 2003. So according to the book Brian McFadden was proud of the Turnaround album which was released in December but was disappointed about Mandy being released as a single. He was personally pushing for On My Shoulders to be released as a single but it never was and by March Brian had left the group behind.

but it never was. And by March, Brian had left the group behind. So in an interview with Will Marlow, he had the following to say, I was standing there trying to sing a song like Mandy and be all emotional, and I've never even met a Mandy. And it shows, it very much sounds like that. So as much as, you know,

as much as Brian himself has stated that he left Westlife in order to spend more time at home with his family, it's hard to ignore the fact that this was the last single before he left. It's the crossroads that we've seen so many times with other pop groups. Either you continue with the group where you make a lot of money but you have no freedom over your schedule or your creative output, or you go it alone where the risk is much higher but you have much more control over your career trajectory and in any case I don't

think either Westlife or Brian McFadden have done too badly out of the split especially given that we'll be covering both of them again on the podcast, but I think this is the exception rather than the rule. And also, I have a little tenuous claim to fame. I actually once walked past Barry Manilow at Heathrow Airport when he was surrounded by six security guards. Wow. How tall is he in real life? He's tiny.

Yes, I can imagine. I had a feeling he would be, yeah. He's very small. He's only Diddy. Well, thank you very much for that dip into Westlife's... the story of Westlife as told

by that book. I'm so glad you've managed to get hold of that. I'm looking forward to it. I think we've got to do Westlife two more times on the show and so yeah interesting to see what the their world is like post brian maybe they'll get more cars who knows um yeah i much like andy have officially run out of things to say i think about westlife um they come along do their thing, which is to approach a ballad in the most straight-jacketed way possible that ends up removing all personality and character

from it. The original isn't, like, a huge favourite of mine, but I think the chorus is, like, really, really memorable and it sticks with you through the years i think um and for that reason i don't think westlife can go that far wrong with it really but well i didn't think that they could but you listen to the scott english version and you listen to the Barry Manilow version and they both imbue it with character they start lines in funny places they finish lines in funny places it feels like a performance of a song whereas this just feels a bit you know like one of the songs that they've you know one of the songs that's been made recently by like you know these AI early tester things where it's like, what if X performed Y instead of Z, where, like, the one that's been going around is, what if Notorious B.I.G. performed

New York State of Mind instead of Nas, and then you listen to it, and it's like, well, this doesn't work because Biggie's flow, the AI thing, is all wrong. Biggie doesn't sound like Nas, that sort of thing. And this kind of makes me feel a bit like that, where it's like, what if Westlife covered Mandy? And then you put it into a computer and then the computer spits this out. Um, and yeah, what, what is there to say? I just, I just, I've lost all kind of patience with them, to be honest. I don't think this is like particularly, it's not like, this isn't like an egregious offense or anything like that, but it's just so everything we've already discussed, like what is there to say? It just feels like by sheer force force these songs get to number one because

there's about you know there's roughly 70 70 to 100 000 people out there who will just go yeah solid i'll buy this because it's westlife and i like westlife and they have that solid core fan base that will always get them to number one in week one. And I think you can start to feel it in this song. You can start to feel the Westlife domination winding down because the numbers that they're shifting aren't quite the same as they used to be. You know, like this is a really popular cover of a really popular song,

and it's got 70,000 copies. When I'm pretty sure we've covered Westlife singles in the past that have pushed six figures in the first week. The one I mentioned in my bit, that sold more than 70,000 and didn't get number one, and apparently that was a crisis. Yeah. And this taking another 11 years to become silver like yeah when we've you know yeah it's not

great so you can kind of feel it winding down it feels like they've kind of run out of ideas a little bit i'm pretty sure that the next two westlife songs that we've got um they're both covers too. And so it feels... I remember reading a little bit as well, because this week I think that Mark Feely has had to pull out of a couple of gigs because he's had some health stuff going on. I think he's had pneumonia or something and he needs recovery time and stuff. And I sort of thought, oh, I'll go and have a look a little bit

at, you know, his backstory, or, you know, how he was involved with Mandy and stuff like that, and apparently, Mark Feely himself was kind of, he ended up in an interview where he was being kind of ragged on a little bit, because he was saying that, oh, the next Westlife single, album is going to be turnaround and it's going to be like original material like there's not going to be any covers on it you know we're going to try and push in a new direction and then the interviewer was kind of saying well you've done another cover you've got to number one again like where was the ambition you were talking about and yeah it feels a little bit i mean simon cowell was not wrong necessarily there's a reason that

his office is filled with you know gold and silver and platinum singles and stuff like that and a mirror that says you're looking great and you know that's kind of like the character he is but also he knows the business and he's a very cynical guy but he makes a lot of money for himself and that's fine but yeah it just you know i feel like we've talked around the song so much rather than discussing the song itself and i think that says everything that you need to know um i was listening to hey whatever and it feels like something that one direction maybe have done like 10 years later you know like when they were sort of midway through their run around the time of like Steal My Girl and songs like that but you know like if you add a few early 2010s bells and whistles to it um whereas and I mean it wasn't

great but like it stuck with me more than this where it's just like meh oh it's you doing that is it you know that's that sort of thing it just feels like the most obvious thing in the world i'm surprised we've not covered this already twice you know but well yeah it just feels like we've kind of been here before like in i think it was 2001 when bot bot baby only got to like number five and then you got queen of my heart which got to number one and i think they probably just got to the point where it's like okay well if we carry on we're going to be five barry manilows but we'll make a lot of money from it so i don't know it's like it must be

demoralizing to think of this fresh new creative direction and then just be told by someone like Simon Cowell, no, actually, this is what you're going to do. And it turns out he's right. Yeah. And at least Barry Manilow had Copacabana. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, well.

Yeah, the only other thing to add is just around the whole thing about how, hey, whatever sold more than this, despite not getting to number one, is that there has been this effect that's happened in enough years now that I think it's a thing that we should remark on, really, which is every year, I think every year we've covered, there seems to be around now, like the episode or the penultimate episode before Christmas, there is a real dip in quality with, with pop music that's to do with low sales perhaps, or not many people releasing at this time, but we had, because I got high happened in 2001 around this time. And last year we had, sorry,

seems to be the hardest word with blue. it, there seems to always be a dip around now, um, for, you know, like I said, there's maybe multiple reasons for that.

But I feel like at other times of year, Mandy wouldn't have slipped in at number one. It wouldn't have got there. But at this time of year, yeah, it seems a bit more achievable. And I wonder if that will continue because, yeah, it is a bit of an odd time, isn't it? Like the month before Christmas because people don't often release stuff then.

And I think stuff like this that's really not worthy of number one each year seems to be getting through around this time. Yeah, it must be that they're saving their big guns for the Christmas number one. Yeah, yeah, definitely. Or because people are buying Christmas presents they're not bothering to buy CD singles.

Yeah. But then people would have bought this as a present back in the day. I think if you were buying a Christmas present you'd buy an album Rather than a single Well I suppose the album's been out Oh no no no the album came out in December What am I saying And got number one this week

So that maybe would explain it That if people are buying the album then what's the need to buy the single True Which is why the sales are low for this one So yeah there's a couple of things around it But there's definitely this lull that always happens in December And yeah, I think Mandy is very typical of that Alright then, next up on this episode is this

I'm here just like I said though it's breaking every rule I've ever made my racing heart is just the same why make it strong My racing heart is just the same. Why make it strong to break it once again? And I'd love to say I do give everything to you,

but I can never now be true. So I say, I think I better leave right now before I fall any deeper. I think I better leave right now feeling weaker and weaker. Somebody better show me how before I fall any deeper. I think I better leave right now

Okay, this is Leave Right Now by Will Young. Released as the lead single from his second studio album titled Friday's Child, Leave Right Now is Will Young's fifth single overall to be released in the UK and his fourth to reach number one. However, to date date it is his last leave right now went straight in at number one as a brand new entry knocking westlife off the top of the charts it stayed at number one for two weeks in its first week at number one it sold 118 000 copies beating competition from i'm your man by Shane Ritchie, which got to number two.

One More Chance by Westlife, which got to number five. What? Yep. Another Westlife. Yeah, and Clap Back by Ja Rule, which got to number nine. In its second week at number one, it sold 83,000 copies, beating competition from Shut Up by Black Eyed Peas,

which got to number two. Say It Isn't So by Gareth Gates, which got to number four, You Make Me Feel Brand New by Simply Red, which got to number seven, Life for Rent by Dido, which got to number eight, Real World by D-Side, which got to number nine, and The Closest Things Are Crazy by Katie Mellua, which got to number ten. Thank you very much tell when it was knocked off the top of the charts leave right now dropped one place to number two by the time it was done on the charts it had been inside the top 100 for 18 weeks the song was certified platinum in the uk in july

2013 yes um just want to reiterate as well thank thank you very much to Terry Wogan for Katie Maluer. Lizzy, how are you feeling about Leave Right Now by Will Young? Yes, if I'd planned them, I'd take that worth life. Yeah. A full decade ago as well, Reason Custard. Oh, I know. Yeah, because that's the thing. I think this is kind of Will's signature song. This came up on Lorraine last week. Yes, I saw that earlier this week, and it really got in my head. Yeah, and I like this one a lot.

I think it's easily his best number one, and I'm very surprised that it's his last number one, because this seemed like an indication of bigger things to come after Will had shed the pop idol association because like I think this is quite a bold step to take when you consider that his pop idol success was only about a year prior and the other big singing contest winner had already crashed and burned with the release of their second album so Will could have quite easily played it safe here but instead he breaks out a very personal emotionally charged ballad with a title that would probably tempt some of his harsher critics

like doing this podcast has made me appreciate Will Young a lot more than I probably would have done during his prime. Of all the big talent show successes, I think he has one of the more distinct and soulful voices, along with the likes of Rebecca Ferguson is a name that stands out in that regard. A couple of others too, but it's quite a short list. a couple of others too but it's a it's quite a short list. I think the only thing that really lets this down is that I can't help but find the production to be a little bit flat. Like I saw a great comparison this week where the author compared this to Careless Whisper by George Michael but that song is a perfect combination of production and performance. I can't fault Will Young for this,

but I find the arrangement is a little bit too clean for a song that's clearly supposed to be very emotive and desperate. But it kind of feels like a nitpick, but it is such a big part of the song that I feel like if that had just been better, then this maybe would have been up in the top tens, top fives of the entire year. But regardless of that, it's by far my favourite song of this week's selection. And as much as I'm sad that we won't get to talk about Will Young at number one again, I'm glad that he managed to leave on a high note before he fell any deeper hey

nice one um do you know lizzie i am in total agreement um i think that when i was looking at this from a distance in our schedule i was like yeah i remember that being okay i think you know from memory the thing that always stuck out in my mind was the music video, which is fantastic. Oh, yeah. Superb music video. That single take. Really good.

Like, him trying to sing to the camera, loads of people trying to talk to him, your eyes constantly focusing on people in the background who are sort of making arrangements to go and, like, who wants to go and get Will? Like, should we go and speak to him? Like, should we go and pull him away from the camera? Like, what's going on here? And then the whole fight breaks out, and then at the end the guy

falls down the stairs. All that kind of stuff is, you know, really great chaos. I feel like it communicates the emotional fraughtness, if that's a right word, of the song in a way that, like, like you were saying, Lizzie, I feel like sometimes maybe the production kind of holds it back. But I think about two months ago, I was in the car with my partner, and we always have, it's either Greatest Hits Radio or Smooth on in the car, because they're never likely to play anything that isn't just like, oh yeah, this, I remember this, you know, like that sort of thing, it's, you know, that they are designed not to offend, and sometimes when

you're just in the car for 20 minutes, that's ideal, and so this came on, and I remember sitting there thinking, I'm singing along to this, like, I caught myself singing to it, and I was like, yeah, this is, this is good, this has This has got something. This is the sound of an artist ever so slightly breaking free from the public's original perception of them and how they were initially presented to the public. It's like the sound of Will trying to become his own artist. The album is from Friday's Child. I remember it being quite a big deal um it always

surprises me looking back that it wasn't like his debut album because of how it kind of relaunched him a little bit you know it was a bit of a i remember it kind of being marketed as like yes it's will young from pop idol but it's a serious album we've put thought into this you know that that kind of like it was trying to appeal to a different kind of market than just the pop idol fans who had stayed with him but also people who were you know this wouldn't surprise me if this had been the debut album if will young had been on fame academy you know like the more serious you know singer songwriter kind of show that's kind of how it was presented um i think this is the album that's also most associated with him and by extension this is the song that's most associated with him um because

i maybe it's more to do with my memory, but as big as his previous singles have been, that we've discussed, Friday's Child and Keep On, those two albums which were responsible for singles like Leave Right Now and Your Game and Who Am I and All Time Love and stuff like that, they're the ones that stick with me and the ones I remember the most.

love and stuff like that they're the ones that stick with me and the ones i remember the most um this i think shows exactly what westlife got wrong with mandy actually which is that just because you're performing a ballad it doesn't mean you can't have lots of fun with your performance it doesn't mean that you can't put your own character and personality into the song you know as well as this being really instant in terms of more surface level and superficial qualities like a earworm chorus and a great performance from Will, it's all the little details that I find myself discovering every time I go back to this. Like the way that Will rises from quite a melodic conversational whisper in the verses to more open-chested

delivery in the chorus, and quite comfortably too, and going even larger in the final stretches of the song. But it's the bridge section before the final chorus that I think really completes this. Just the way that he changes up the rhythm of his vocal slightly where he does the quick run with the i wouldn't know how to say and changes up the tempo slightly of his own performance and introduces new sections with vim and vigor and as much as is necessary for this song without going over the top um the reason not to give it away the only reason this just misses out for me on the vault, and really only just, is that I think it's just that the lyrics don't follow Will's emotional journey through the song. I think by the time of the final chorus, we have so clearly moved on from where we were with the first chorus,

and yet the lyrics are identical, even know we're in a very different place emotionally and i think unfortunately as well it's also been recorded in this era of pop where everything's very kind of trebly and light and too clean i think that with something you know some 70s dust or with some 2010s kind of like throbbing undercurrent I think this could have been a little stronger and more impactful but

everything comes through Will I think with this I think this is a lovely song but I think Will is the thing that kind of pushes it as close to greatness as it can be um i was actually quite struck by how my more recent perceptions of this have kind of they've been very different to what i forecasted for myself with this um and i'm yeah i'm really happy that we've uh we've covered it my favorite will song doesn't get to number one which is um well it's either your game or who am i i really like those two uh especially

who am i with that strange kind of like dusty hallucinogenic blue peter superimposed video thing where he's kind of wandering around strange images of his childhood associated with blue peter and it's like he's completely out of place there because all is the the costumes that he wears to try and look like you know blue peter presenters all look slightly uncanny valley and slightly out of place like you recognize it but it's not quite right um and it really fits the mood of the the song as well um but yeah no um i was more impressed with this than i expected to be andy how do you feel yeah i don't really know what else i can add to be honest you two have absolutely nailed it um fully agree with everything both of you have said really um that it's it is

really really good and it struck me far more than i expected it to. But it's not quite in that special territory. But I do think this deserves a lot of praise, and I think Will deserves a lot of praise individually. I really always had it in my head that this came out in 2005 and it feels like a very distinct era that's different entirely from Will on Pop Idol. This feels like he's years on. Really impressive that he's only actually about 18 months on from Evergreen and here he is

with this very kind of adult, very authentic material. It is helped along by that video. It's a really, really great video. Kind of shades of Bittersweet Symphony in there. Yes, good comparison. Yeah, I like that whole style of

like breaking the fourth wall and not being interrupted and stuff it's nice it makes you feel like you have a special connection with him and he has to do some actual acting in that video as well you know to make it work he has to kind of not be swayed by what's going on around him and keep that face keep that sort of poker face to the audience. It really works. It's a really great video. As for the actual song, completely, completely agree with what you said, Rob, about how it needs to advance a little bit further, both lyrically and musically,

that it sort of feels like it should be telling more of a story, and it's not, which holds it back slightly. It's got one central idea, which is like, I'm nervous, so I better go. And it doesn't really move beyond central idea which is like oh i'm nervous so i better go and it doesn't really move beyond that which is a bit of a shame and um i completely agree with what lizzie said as well in that the production is flat that it needs a lift needs something bigger i don't know what that is to be honest because i don't want it to have cheesy strings all over it i don't want it to have a key change it just needs something it needs a bit of a lift maybe some more different instrumentation maybe some kind of harmonies for will or something like that i don't know it needs

something maybe if it could follow in careless whispers example they can have an epic sax solo after each chorus i don't know never hurt any song ever but anyway yeah no i do really like this and i do think it's will's signature song the other thing as well that I just think was repeating is that it's just so catchy. It's such an earworm that I'm not surprised you were singing along with it in the car Rob because it's one of those songs you kind of can't help but sing along to and there's not that many proper down-tempo ballads out there that are actually that catchy that will really get in your head um you know it's generally something you associate more with upbeat songs and the fact that this is always always in my head this week while i've been listening to it and when it coincidentally came on on monday on the tv i think it's a testament to what a well-written song it is that it's it's

simple but effective and it's not like super effective like it doesn't really really go to somewhere special but it is very effective it does the job really well and I think it sets the stall out for Will's future in that actually he's got complex mature things to say he can deliver it in a credible and authentic way and just because he used the talent show as a platform doesn't mean that he is sorry for the comparison but it doesn't mean he's another Gareth Gates. He's got an absolutely fantastic voice, he's got, you know, real character about him, and he's got interesting material backing him up, so he's really got the whole package. I do wish that it had a bit more of a lift, that had a bit more of a kick in the pants, just to kind of give it something, which would probably put it in the vault for me, like Rob said.

But this is really nice and far and away, far and away the best song of this week. I mean, thank God for Will, because, you know, we obviously had Mandy before it. And wait till you see what we've got next. God, thank you, Will. Thanks for something. Yeah. Yes, it would have been a shite week. And maybe we should follow Will's advice and leave right now before we discuss the next one.

We'll wrap the episode up and pretend that the next song just didn't happen. No, unfortunately, we are obligated. So, next up, it's this. I feel unhappy I am so sad I lost the best friend That I ever had She is my baby I love her so

But it's too late now I've let her go We're going through changes We're going through changes Changes is Kelly's fourth single overall to be released in the UK and her first to reach number one. It is also the 15th solo single to be released by Ozzy Osbourne and his first to reach number one. As of 2023 it is the last song by either Kelly or Ozzy to reach number one. The song is a reinterpretation of Black Sabbath's original song released in 1972. Changes went straight in at number one as a brand new entry knocking Will Young off the top of the

charts. It stayed at number one for one week. In its first and only week at number one, it sold 86,000 copies beating competition from Santa's List by Cliff Richard, which got to number five, that might have been worse, My Immortal by Evanescence, which got to number seven, The Voice Within by Christina Aguilera, which got to number 9, and Have a Cheeky Christmas by the Cheeky Girls, which got to number 10. When it was knocked off the top of the charts, changes fell two places to number 3. By the time it was done on the charts, it had been inside the top 100 for 16 weeks.

The song was officially certified gold in the UK in January 2004. Andy, go ahead. Oh, can I? Yay. Jesus Christ. Yeah, so this, eh? So, when I was talking about Westlife and I said, you know, it's not the worst song we've ever covered on the show, but it's a competitor for the blandest show we've ever covered, the blandest song we've ever covered. Now, this is a contender for the worst song we have ever covered on this show, I think. This is just, it's awful in a way that is exquisite. It's awful in a way that is almost art. It's kind of on the back foot from the start for me, because there is something, I don't know what it is,

but there is something about Ozzy Osbourne's voice and him in general that I just cannot take him one tiny nanomillimeter seriously. He just makes me laugh so much. He could say anything and it would make me laugh out loud. That voice with the, Sharon! And, you know,

it works when he's in Black Sabbath and he's being this kind of big, over-the-top rock show and he bites bats' heads off and stuff. It works for that theatrical side of him. Very few people are as good at it as he is. But you give him a slow ballad

with his daughter and, you know, Kelly does a perfectly decent job with this. She's got a voice that is a little bit generic, but is basically fine. And then you contrast that with this demon voice that Ozzy's got, where he's like, we're coming! You know, struggling to hit those top notes. Like, struggling even more than I just did there. And it's really, like like such a badly conceived idea

and obviously you know the whole context to it which i i feel like lizzie will know more about because this is lizzie's area of expertise always having the backstory and things is it well i'm just just a guess but i you know the context of it with the osbournes and all that, that that show was at its height at this time, yeah, I get that. But really, what is the point of this? I mean, like I say, Kelly Osbourne, not got anything against her. And I think if this was just her, it would be unremarkable. It would be like a 5 out of 10, whatever, nothing to say about it. Weird choice of song for a young female musician trying to get into the pop scene,

considering it's like this old parental thing. But that's where Ozzy comes in, and it becomes this weird thing that doesn't sit in the pop landscape anywhere, that it's like this cultural thing that's just about the Osbournes and their relationship with each other, covering this really, really old song that doesn't fit in the pop charts at all, and is only here because of the Osbournes because it's certainly not there because of the vocals which, from Kelly's sense, are just fine and from Ozzy's sense, like,

I just want this song to end five minutes ago the second I put it on because it's just that hard to listen to. And then you've got that video as well with the two of them on thrones it's like let's rotate the boards from Mitchell and Webb

let's just go round and round and it's just I don't get it every single part of this song is so badly conceived the only reason I would consider it maybe not the worst song we've ever covered is that it was so bad it was good

I kind of got some joy from listening to this and watching the video because I've got a lot of time for Ozzy Osbourne just because he makes me laugh so much. And also, something this bad is at least memorable. But, oh my god, it's so awful.

Yeah, wow. Yeah, I hate it. Well, do you know, Andy, you're actually being kinder to this than i am going to be purely because you've said that kelly osborne's vocals are fine i mean i wouldn't say they're like you know i don't okay i'll say they're not just like offensively awful but to you i i don't think she would have earned a pop career if she was not you know the child of the osbornes i don't think i don't think she would have earned a pop career if she was not the child of the Osbournes. I don't think it merits a pop career,

her voice. But she's not off-key or pained in the way that Ozzy is. But go on. Maybe I'm wrong. What do you think, Rob? I think both of the vocals on this are two of the worst I've ever heard

on a number one single from any era I really really wanted to be kind to this but it's dog shit it's just like like you were saying Andy Kelly can sort of hold the melody but she over intonates

she sounds so flat when she's doing it as well even just like pronunciations of like words like daddy. Daddy. And Ozzy's currently in this weird era where he's still trying to hit the notes of old, but can't do it. And so he sounds like he's straining a lot and it can't be hidden with all the studio trickery in the world

I'm still not entirely unconvinced that the producers weren't playing some kind of massive practical joke on Ozzy by going yeah yeah that sounds fine mate yeah yeah and then sort of like when he's gone they go Jesus what are we going to do

with this because the way that they pan them both into the left and right ears in the chorus, Jesus, bloody Christ. They don't even make them do harmonies. I was going to say. They honestly just sound like starving alley cats in the chorus. It would solve

so much to have them harmonise. It really would. You could disguise both of their failings by having them harmonise. Yeah. That stood out to me as well. i was doing a little bit of research into this and i found that like this era of his solo career is largely considered to be the worst by his fans because you got his album um down to earth and then you've got another one which is called undercover which is literally just an album of covers, and those are the ones that Aussie fans kind of look at and go, nah, it wasn't on it here. Like, it seems like he has a bit of a resurgence in, like, the late 2000s and through the 2010s, like, some of his solo stuff

seems like it's alright, but not many fans of this particular era, the Osbournes TV show era. this particular era, the Osbournes TV show era, outside of the vocals, I just think this is long and plodding and very, very dull. Even the little changes that they've made to the arrangement compared to the original, where, like, they have the choir and they make it sound all large and stuff, you know, because the original is just piano and Mellotron, I think, with Ozzy singing over it to the end, and I'm not, like, the biggest fan of the original, but it at least gives me an image of a guy hammering away at a piano in a basement, lonely and despondent from a divorce, you know, like, because it's the, I'm going through changes, you know the i'm going through changes you know i'm going through a divorce that sort of thing whereas this just feels like a bizarre cut scene from the osborne show

like by the two minute mark i am done with this just done and then i'm not even halfway through there's a reason i had a look at every single tv performance of this that i could find on youtube every single one of them every single one of them is mimed and every single one performance of this that I could find on YouTube every single one of them is mimed and every single one of them stops dead at the three minute mark and it's because the four minute version adds fuck all to the experience and

like the vocals, god I dread to think how they sound away from the studio like honestly, there are songs out there that I just think, especially with vocals, like, what the hell were you doing? How did this make it past so many people?

The other one I think of is Jack White and Alicia Keys, Another Way to Die. Oh, I know. From Clockwork Solace. Oh, so bad. Yeah, the vocals are awful. If they were ever in a room together i am surprised because they both sound horrendous absolutely horrendous together i'm not the biggest fan of

alicia key's voice anyway to be honest like there's an advert of for lloyd's well not for lloyd's tsb but you know whatever bank exists now where the adverts are just horses, where they've got Girl on Fire playing over the advert. Oh, God. Jesus Christ, Alicia Keys' voice in that song drives me to the fucking wall. And this makes me feel a similar way where I'm like, no, you're being too harsh, you're being too harsh. It was trying to play into a storyline with the TV show. I always say that pop is a bigger product than the song itself.

And there was a whole storyline with this in the show, I guess, where, like, Ozzy was struggling to form a relationship with his rebel daughter and all this kind of stuff. And it was all managed and, you know, it all kind of... There's an element of synergy between it. So maybe you're just being, like, too harsh. And then I throw it on again. And, like, I totally understand why they're trying to repackage the song between it so maybe you're just being like too harsh and then i throw it on again and like i

totally understand why they're trying to repackage the song as one that's not necessarily about divorce but is one about parents having to let their kids go but kids also observing the pain that their you know that their parent is going through at watching them leave the nest. And every time I think about trying to look beneath the surface of this and find something deeper within it so that I can be kinder to it, you know, I just, all I have to do is listen to it. Like, when I'm thinking about the song and it's not playing, I'm like, yeah, maybe it's not that bad. You know, it has stuff to read into, but then I play it again and I'm just like, no, end it, do it, get it, just get

it off, basically, you know, maybe it reveals a side of Ozzy that a lot of people didn't know at the time that has stuck since, you know, and ever since like the quad biking accident, you know, like people have seen him as like a family man and someone who's more frail on the inside, you know, that sort of thing. I mean, I know that a lot of effort has gone into the thing about him biting the bat's head off like the confusion around that which is that like obviously it played well into his image in the 70s and 80s that like whoa ozzy osbourne's insane he'll do this whereas what happened was he in the moment of the gig he thought that he had been thrown a stuffed toy yeah when he had actually been thrown a dead bat

and it was like a prank that was played on him that kind of worked out in his favor um and so he did bite the head off a bat but there's context missing from that and i feel like the osborne's tv show as much as i think it made stars out of Jack and Kelly Osbourne when they were not ready and not equipped to be stars um and as much as I think it it sort of helped transition the public spotlight away from Ozzy a little bit and more towards Sharon because she's about to take over as an X Factor judge become one of the most recognizable faces on British TV and one of the most prolific faces on British TV during the 2000s but all of this I just I think the lyrical changes are actually really corny and the vocals are just nails on a chalkboard kind of stuff i don't feel the chemistry like i try to

be charitable to this but then like i say all i have to do is turn it on and i'm reminded of why i'm not being charitable i have a constant conversation with myself about this and every time the side of me that just sits there and thinks what on earth were we thinking when we got this to number one that's the side that wins i just think like it you are right rob that like it's a song that can have different contexts quite easily like it's the it's the theme tune well a cover of this is used as a theme tune for big mouth you know the show on netflix it's a it's about puberty yeah and you know you can easily repurpose it for that but I feel like what you were saying about how trying to be charitable about it because of all

the other stuff around it that it's a cultural thing and I feel like because I was a bit too young I didn't watch the Osbournes and I still never have and I feel like if you haven't seen it you're just completely shut out of this like it just you cannot access this song at all it's like what is this like we've just had like crazy in love a few weeks ago you know we've got all sorts of variety in the charts at the moment like pop is really exciting and then there's this where it's like this old aging rock star with his daughter who i vaguely know who kelly osborne is but it's like why should i care about this why should should I care? Like the context can be changed quite easily but the key to it is whether

you connect with it and I can't connect with it at all so I think you're right to not be charitable because you have to really squint at it and you'd have to really turn a blind eye to all of its problems to do that which I'm not prepared to do. Lizzie, how about you?

Well yeah Rob I'm glad you mentioned the acv accident because that what that happened the same day this single was released right okay and you could maybe call that um interesting timing i'm not saying he faked it to get publicity but oh god no maybe yeah maybe gave it another bit of a thrust into the public limelight because I don't think this would have got number one without it, arguably. I think it maybe would have, might have got in the lower reaches of the top 10 but I think that additional boost might be, it might be something. Obviously the Osbourne show was big and having watched an episode of it i can say that

kelly is annoying on a molecular level and ozzy is near incomprehensible because as he himself admits he was stoned throughout the whole run yeah and so yeah is it any wonder that this is a mess from top to bottom like the arrangement is cloying and mawkish. The rewritten lyrics don't make any sense, even with the show for context. And there was a comment on this song from the time that stuck with me regarding Ozzy's vocals. Sadly, I couldn't find the original quote, but to paraphrase, they said that he sounded like, quote, like all of his teeth had been replaced with bees I've never been able to get that out of my head

it's such an exquisitely perfect statement and also I sent you that you know about Kelly the John Fassold video how every Lana Del Rey song is written. Yeah.

And he does that thing where it's like, there goes my daddy. It's like, that's Kelly here. And yeah, much like the show, it's a product of its time. It's a fluke success born out of events in pop culture combined with the messy dynamic of the Osbourne family itself. The problem is I genuinely feel bad for both of the performers here which is never a good sign. Like people maybe talk more about Ozzy on this song because of his place in the history of rock and roll music and how far away this song

and this performance is from what made him an icon but with kelly she's not even 20 years old and she's already been typecast by her record label as daughter of ozzy osbourne like in 2002 she released a cover of papa don't preach which might i remind you was a song about teenage pregnancy she wasn't pregnant by the way i don't know if they were doing that on the show i can't be bothered to look at that episode but you know what i mean it's like yeah you're already just setting her up for failure like when you're the child of an incredibly influential artist in any discipline those comparisons are a death sentence unless you are a genuine star on the level of your progenitor, which neither Jack nor Kelly were and probably never would have been, regardless of the show.

So, yeah, it's a disaster from top to bottom. It's a complete failure. And I'd also like to introduce a new award for it, which is the most inappropriate bonus track on a single release. And I'd like to nominate the first winner, which is Changes, brackets, Who's the Daddy Dub Mix? Yeah, also Felix the House Cat did a dance remix of this. You've got to check that out.

It's not very good, but it's there. Of all the songs that just don't suit dance mixes as well, like... Yeah, I know. It's like you lost a bet. Jesus. It's really bad. There's just a whole sense of, like, deliberately airing dirty laundry about all this, isn't there?

That, like, they have a public image which is so closely tied together that it feels uncomfortable. It's kind of like the Amy and Mitch Winehouse relationship where it's like, oh God, you two both need therapy separately from each other. Get away from each other. It's gross. And I really don't like to see this.

I don't care, quite frankly. And I agree with you. It's like let kelly find her own place in the world because it can be done you know like miley cyrus has done it so successfully you know yeah you can do it you can do it you can find your own image just get away from your parents it's like a music career never really took off but she kind of went more into the Sharon mould of a solid judge on TV contests, panel show, a peerer. She's done a ton. She's one of those people where you wonder,

like, whatever happened to her? And then you go on a Wikipedia and she's got a list as long as Chris Jericho's 1,000 holds. But yeah, I'd also like to thank the Osbournes for inadvertently giving us the Kardashians

thanks for that guys appreciate it. That's a good point actually I think if this was a TV show podcast and we discussed the Osbournes that does feel like a moment, like a bit of a transitional point definitely, because it was very successful

really, really successful It was huge Maybe next year we'll have Caitlin and Kylie Jenner singing a cover of Changes as Christmas number one 2024 I mean, I just want to mention this again, I really wish we were

talking about Ozzy and Jessica Simpson's cover of Walking in a Winter Wonderland. So, so funny. So funny. Sleigh bells ring. Sleigh bells ring. Shara. My favourite bit in that is when they do the key change

and... Oh, God. Dear God, that is, I can't recommend that enough, it's so funny he sounds like he's gonna burst yeah just spontaneously combust okay so

before we leave we're just gonna check Mandy by Westlife, is that going in the pie hole or the vault for anybody that's definitely not going in the piehole or the vault for anybody? That's definitely not going in the vault. No. Piehole for me.

Piehole for me as well. Wow. Three piehole votes. Not good. Not good. Leave Right Now. That flirted with the vault for me but hasn't quite made it. Same. Yeah. Not quite. Just misses out. Thank you very much, Will. that flirted with the vault for me but hasn't quite made it same, yeah

yeah, not quite, just misses out thank you very much Will and changes by Ozzy and Kelly Osbourne oh, stick that pie in the oven that is a well cooked pie this one it is, yeah

yeah, same, yeah so another triple pie hole vote three pie holes two turtle doves and a Aussie and a pear tree six pie holes in one week wow not a good week

so when we come back we'll be covering the race for Christmas number one 2003 and I think anybody who's into pop will know that the race for Christmas number one 2003 was a particularly hotly contested one don't worry

we'll cover the top ten as we always do thank you so much for listening again this is it for this week's episode and we'll see you next time so thank you very much and goodbye. Bye-bye. See you.

But I said you've been gay, oh Andy. You kissed me and stopped me from something. And I... Dad, why are you singing? Tell a lie, tell a lie. Because I have a small role in a Broadway musical. It's not much, but it's a start. Bravo.

Are you hiding something from me? Like what? Judging from your song, you're infatuated with a woman named Mindy. Or a man named Andy. Lisa, look out behind you. Dad, I'm not going to fall for that. No, Lisa, I swear to you, I'm 100% completely serious. You've got to turn around right now before it's too late!

Huh? Sucker! Oh Margie, you came and you found me a turkey On my vacation away from worky Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr